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#but you're sitting there like we don't ACTUALLY live with that many people i am capable to figure things out from observation
pururing · 2 days
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Hi everyone, thank you so much for your supportive messages. I'm not sure if it's okay to answer since I don't allow anonymous questions, so I didn't. I'll go thank you personally later when I have time.
I was pretty upset yesterday and will be thinking about what to do for a while(probably just sit and wait for the next episode for now), but thanks to a few people who were willing to speak up, I had a much better day for you. It means a lot to me that you took the risk of getting involved in a needless dispute and did this.
I think most of the communication failures start with the disagreement that Asians can't be whiter than Caucasians (I'm not convinced of this, so I prefer the way it's portrayed in the show).
And when I said that children tend to have lighter skin than their parents, I meant that they are generally lighter because they haven't seen much sunlight yet. They will change as they grow, This is due to the experience of watching many children(mostly my baby sibling and cousins) and my own growing up experience. but perhaps my translator mistranslated it as "getting lighter as they older" which is opposit of what I tried to tell, and I didn't catch it, so there was some miscommunication.
As I mentioned, I'm just working from what I see on the screen. I did find some pictures that suggest that Jee may look brighter than maddie, but I won't upload them here because the gif creator may be offended that I'm dragging his work into this debate. (My google search was jee maddie. If anyone wants to look it up.)
I don't think there's any more controversy to be had, and I'm sure anyone who disagrees with me has already blocked me, so I'm going to try something a little different. Here's the real reason for my boring and long post.
I wanted to clarify that I am very careful with racial descriptions.
As I said before, I'm a mainstream Korean and because of this, I grew up in an atmosphere that was pretty indifferent to other cultures and countries. When I became an adult, I was fortunate enough to have friends from Europe, America, Canada, Latin America, Southeast Asia, etc. I was quite shocked. The world is so much bigger and more diverse than what I had conceptually known. And that people in those cultures are very proud of their identity. And I really respect it.
After that realization, I could have gone back to living a normal life in Korea, but unfortunately, I was born to be a fanartist, and I started to like foreign content instead of Korean content. (like Japanese, Chinese, English-based content, etc.).
I learned about how some effective but insensitive depictions can be historically and realistically offensive and unpleasant experiences for certain races. The problem is that there are a lot of small details that you really don't notice if you're not a party to them, especially since so many discussions are primarily in English and the information curated by a few active people and translated into our social media is where most of our knowledge comes from, so we can offend people without even trying.
I am very aware of this and am open to input from others in this regard. I am very cautious about drawing a race I don't know in the first place, so I try to avoid realistic depictions. But on the other hand, the "cartoon" style I've been taught actually leads me to omit many features. Age, body type, beauty. So this is the style I've adopted when I want to draw fanart of works based on real people, especially if they're multiracial (especially since I've always been more of a comic artist than an illustrator.) I wish I was a better artist and had more options, but honestly, this is my limit. Sorry.
I would like to apologize if anyone feels hurt or upset by any of my non-Asian characters and thinks they are too stereotypical, don't look like them at all, or are too ridiculous.(Even white people. I was taught that there are many differences and histories even among people who are considered white.)
I really don't want to use my art style as a shield to justify any depiction of race, and I'm worried that someone might get the wrong idea that I have such an opinion.
All of my intentions are simply to make sure that no one in the fandom is offended by the artwork, and to provide some lighthearted entertainment that is just a good laugh at a silly cartoon.
Sometimes people wonder why we invest so much passion into a character on screen, but it's a great feeling to share and empathize with someone who feels the same way. Especially when they have something in common with you. That's why I cared so much about Jee and Chimney even though I'm primarily a Buddie shipper. I don't know a lot about immigrants, but I found it very funny and entertaining that he immigrated when he was 5 years old, his family moved back to Korea, and his father video calls from his very traditional grandfather's room. Despite the many inaccuracies, it's fun to see someone try this hard. I will say here that I am very cautious when drawing other races because I understand that my inaccurate depictions can create an unpleasant experience for others, especially if they feel a strong connection to them.
So, I'm not sure what I will do in the future or when I will draw and share more, but if anyone finds any depictions in my future drawings that may be offensive, I will be open to being corrected. I just don't want my Korean identity to be infringed upon by claims that I don't resemble the way "Asian stereotypes" are drawn. (There's a reason I say Korean identity, not Asian or East Asian. The history here is too complex to group into one word…) I will respect others and you will respect me. That's all I want.
Anyway, that's all I have to say. I am aware that my upbringing inevitably narrows my perspective, and I don't want to use my people of color or non-Western culture as a weapon to further an agenda of agency that I don't have.
If anyone is still reading, thanks for the long read. really. And I'm sorry for bringing conflict into the fandom.
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heavyhitterheaux · 1 month
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Drive Safe Part 3
First Lady of Private Garden Fic
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AN: Our wild ride has come to an end 🥹😘
Synopsis: You confront your best friend for what she did to you behind your back all while trying to make sense of your future with Jack. The ultimate question is, are you willing to give your ex-husband another chance?
Pairing: Ex-husband!Jack Harlow x Ex-wife!Reader
Read Part 1 and Part 2 first
Please Do Not Repost My Content Anywhere
After hearing Taylor confess what you had heard Jack tell Urban left you in a daze. So, he in fact was telling the truth, however your best friend or someone who you thought was your best friend went behind your back and betrayed you. Never did you think that in a million years that she would do something like this and try to play innocent and continue on with life as usual as if nothing happened.
“Y/N, I know you're pissed at me and for good reason and I know I shouldn't have done it and…”
You immediately cut her off.
“Let me ask you something. Did you honestly think that you could do that and ultimately get away with it? Yes, me and him have our issues but stepping out on one another because of a disagreement has never been a reality. No matter how mad at each other we are. Bottom line, you took advantage of him being in a vulnerable stage. Even if I am still very mad at him, I'm going to defend him when someone does him wrong. And in this case, you were in fact… wrong.”
“I…”
“I thought that at least you were one of the last people I could count on to have my back, but low and behold you wanted my man for yourself. Everyone has treated me like shit since this first happened and since obviously my feelings don't matter to you or anyone else, there's nothing left for me to say. We are done here and you can forget about being their godmother. Lose my number and do not call me again for as long as you live.”
“Wait, just….. we're throwing our friendship away over a mistake I made? I confessed and I apologized. I don't know what came over me to do that and deep down I knew it wasn't right. But I just….”
“A mistake you hid from me for damn near two years and it wasn't a mistake actually. I had my suspicions, but I was trying to give you the benefit of the doubt, thinking no, there's no way in the world that my best friend would do that to me. You were in your right mind and knew what you were doing. And to think I trusted you. I've told you things In confidence that I have never told anyone else and you just….I need to leave. And you can pick up the tab since you want to be kissing other people's husbands.”
“It’s never going to happen again, I don’t want to lose you as a friend.”
“You've already lost me as a friend from the moment you tried to kiss Jack. It's not going to happen again, because you are going to stay as far away as possible from us. Did you really think that I would forgive you for doing something like that to me? You broke my trust and that is not something that cannot be repaired overnight. Oh, and one last thing, I knew what you did for months now and was just simply waiting for you to confess.”
Taylor was sitting there absolutely stunned and unable to speak. And it looked as if her eyes were starting to water.
“Didn't think it was going to take this long, but here we are. I'm taking my food to go and have the day you deserve. And you can save your tears for someone who actually cares.”
Without another word, you slid back from the table and went to the front of the restaurant to let them know that you wanted your order to go and that Taylor would be paying for it. 
Once you got outside in your rental car, the tears started to roll down your face. You were proud of yourself, but also hurting. You felt that at this point, you didn't have anyone anymore and you simply wanted to go back home to Louisville or Atlanta rather and be away from it all. Because Atlanta was the only place where you felt that your life actually made sense. Louisville held too many memories for you and every single one of them had to do with Jack. 
You had gotten back to the beach house in record time and stared at your phone contemplating if you were going to call Jack or not to let him know that you had talked to Taylor. Making your way inside, you sat everything down in the kitchen before making your way upstairs to the bedroom since your desire to eat anything was now gone. You picked up your phone and then shook your head and placed it on the dresser before the tears started falling again.
If you knew the shitstorm that would happen when Jack asked for you to marry him, you probably would have never done it. But who were you kidding? You knew deep down that you still would have said yes despite what was going on around you at the present moment. Did you see yourself marrying him again? Only time would be able to tell. The most important thing that you needed to focus on right now was trying to heal. 
Jack played with his phone in his hands contemplating calling your older sister, Danielle, but had a strong feeling that she wouldn't want to hear anything that he had to say.
But he had to try.
He was willing to do absolutely anything to get you to forgive him and get him to marry him again. Even though you told him that marriage was definitely off the table, in the back of his mind and deep down he knew that if he wasn't able to get married to you again that he wouldn't get married again at all. You were the love of his life and he ruined it.
Before he backed out, he quickly hit her number to call her as his heart was damn near beating out of his chest.
And now he was hoping she didn't answer. 
But luck wasn't on his side and she did.
“Hello?”
“Dani, it's Jack.”
“I know. I have something called caller id on my iphone.”
“Umm….”
“What do you need?”
“Um, for your little sister to stop ignoring my calls and talk to me.”
All Dani did was scoff before responding.
“And you think that you deserve to talk to her after what you did?” Dani asked and now Jack was starting to regret ever picking up the phone to call her.
“Dani, she's pregnant.”
“I am aware. I was there when she took the test. What's your point?”
“Dani, please. I just want her to talk to me so she can hopefully forgive me and we can get back together.”
“Jack, I told you to do one thing when it came to her. ONE. Do you remember what that was?”
“Take care of her.”
“Hmm, and did you do like I asked?”
“Well…”
“No. You didn't. Instead you hurt my baby girl and quite frankly, I’m surprised she stayed with you as long as she did. That girl LOVES you and would do anything for you, but instead you let your little fame get to your head. As much as she would call me crying all times of the night over you, you honestly think you deserve to be in a relationship with her again?”
“I know I've messed up and that I've hurt her, but all I want to do is make it right. I don't want anyone else or be married to anyone else. I didn't even want to sign the divorce papers!”
All Dani did was sigh before responding.
“You better listen to me and listen to me good. I will do what I can, but it is ultimately her decision. If she gets back with you, fine. I'll support it. If she doesn't, I'm also going to support it. But one thing I'm not going to tolerate is you disrespecting her. That is the mother of three of your big headed children so give her the respect she deserves. She's in Miami and I'm going to check on her so I'll do my best to see if she’ll talk to you. No promises.”
“That's literally all I ask.”
“But if she says no, unless it has to do with your unborn children, you better leave her the fuck alone.”
Not realizing that you fell asleep after confronting Taylor, you woke up to see that it was dark outside and had no clue what time it was. Grabbing your phone and wincing from the light as you put your password in, you saw that it was around nine at night.
Sighing to yourself, you threw the comforter away from your body to make your way downstairs to come face to face with your older sister who was currently sitting in the living room and scrolling away on her phone. 
Hearing your footsteps come up behind her, she quickly greeted you.
“Lil Bit, I thought you were going to sleep until next week.”
“Uh? What are you doing here?” You sleepily asked as you rubbed your eyes.
“Don't you think I know when you need me?”
“I'm fine.”
“Are you?” She asked as you came to sit across from her.
You wanted to say yes, that you were indeed in fact fine, but the words just weren't coming out. Instead, something else did.
“I miss him and I HATE myself for feeling like this.” You breathed out while wrapping your arms around yourself.
“It's not like it was a one night stand. You two were MARRIED. And have known each other since you two were fourteen. That doesn't go away overnight. There's going to be ups and downs with healing from that. It isn't linear.”
“But I'm just so MAD at him for what he did. No matter how much he tries to take it back and apologize, what's done is done. And that song felt like a legit slap to the face.”
“He's not perfect, but neither are you. He definitely could have gone about it a different way, but what's done is done and the only thing you can do is move forward from it.”
“He called you, didn't he?” You asked as you were eyeing Dani.
“Maybe, maybe not.”
“DANIELLE….”
“He did and in not so many words, begged for me to convince you to talk to him and to stop ignoring his calls.”
“And? What did you tell him?”
“After I threatened him, I said that I would try to convince you, but no promises. He has a show in Miami in two days so I figured you two can talk then. If you want to, that is.”
“I don't know If I want to.” You answered being completely honest. 
“You said you missed him.”
“I miss a lot of things, but I've learned to adjust.”
“You aren't adjusting. You're avoiding it.”
“I don't remember asking for a therapy session.”
“Look, I get that you're hurting and want to take some time for yourself, but you cannot keep this bottled up because you are legit going to explode.” 
“What are people going to say if I take him back?”
“Who gives a flying fuck? That's your business and no one else's. Two people would be in that relationship and not the entire world.”
“But he legit disrespected me multiple times.” 
“Y/N, if you are looking for me to tell you what to do, it’s not going to happen. In the end, this has to be a decision that you have to live with. No one else. Just know that whatever you decide, I will support you 100%.”
Before you answered her, you simply sighed.
“What venue is he performing at on Saturday?”
—-
Saturday finally rolled around and you had been on edge for the entire day. The time for you to leave was inching closer and closer and you were seriously about to back out of it altogether. Taking a deep breath, you gave yourself a once over in the floor length mirror at your black dress that you were wearing along with a pair of your Steve Madden sandals and was satisfied with how the outfit came together. You had straightened your hair earlier in the day, so the only thing left to do was to confront him.
You had been confronting a lot of people lately and wanted for this to be the end of it.
Dani volunteered to go with you and the two of you rode in silence to the venue with her taking quick glances at you to see that you were scrolling on your phone from time to time. Once the two of you arrived and made your way inside, Jack was already on stage and Urban had quickly spotted the two of you.
“Hi Urby.” You said as he engulfed you in a bear hug.
“Hey, didn’t know you were coming tonight.”
“I didn’t know either until two days ago.”
“He’ll be happy to see you. Come this way so I can take you two backstage so you can watch from the side.”
“Hmm, we’ll see if that still rings true after I talk to him.”
All Urban did was hold his hands up in defense before shrugging since he knew that you were just about at your wits end with everything that had been going on. 
You and Dani quickly followed behind Urban and since everyone recognized you, you were able to get backstage with no problem. But you also knew in the back of your mind that your so-called ex-best friends were probably there as well, right along with Neelam. And of course she had spotted you.
“Y/N?”
“The one and only unless there’s another one that I don’t know about?” You quickly said to her as Dani stifled a laugh.
“Can we…?” She started to say, but you immediately cut her off.
“No. I’m here for one person and one person only. If I wanted to talk to any of the rest of you, I would have told you. I’ll let you know when I’m ready whenever that time comes.”
“I.. fair enough. You both can come over here to watch him from the side.”
It took less than five minutes for Jack to spot you standing on the side and he got the biggest smile on his face and you simply gave him a tight lipped smile in return. You did your part of willing to open the lines of communication, but if it was something that you didn’t want to hear, you were immediately going to cut it off.
Once his set was over, he quickly jogged off the stage towards you and opened his arms for a hug which surprisingly you actually returned.
You had missed this feeling. 
“Can we go somewhere and talk?” You asked him and he quickly nodded as he led the two of you to his dressing room.
Once the door was closed, you let him have it. 
“Babe? Is everything okay? What are you doing here? And I mean that in the best way possible.”
“Don't call me that, Jackman. You lost the privilege to do so. But let’s just cut to the chase shall we? You called Dani to get me to talk to you so here I am. Now onto my most pressing question, why didn't you tell me what Taylor did?” 
Jack, obviously taken aback, cleared his throat before answering you. And all he did was rock back and forth on his heels before sighing.
“Because I didn't think you would believe me if I had told you when it originally happened.”
“But not to say anything at all? You were supposed to protect me, we're supposed to protect each other! I had the fakest person under my nose for the longest and you said NOTHING.”
“I…. I didn't know what to do. You already didn't want to be bothered with me and I didn't want to create an even bigger mess. Wait, she told you?”
“Yes and kept asking me before she did if you had said something to me first.”
“I'm sorry, and I know that I should have. I would never cheat on you no matter how mad I might be. You mean too much to me for me to do that.”
“Hmm, your actions lately say otherwise. You hurt me with that shit you pulled and should have come and talked to me.”
“I know and I don't have an excuse for it. I just wish we could start over and just forget that any of this ever happened.”
“Do you honestly think that you deserve another chance?”
“Dani legit said the same thing.” He mumbled before taking a seat next to you and grabbing your left hand which was still decorated with your wedding ring. Except it wasn’t on your ring finger.
He began to play with it as he was waiting for you to say something.
“How do I know that something like this won’t ever happen again?” You asked and that was when he finally looked up at you.
“Because we’re going to communicate better and be honest with each other about how we’re feeling. That was my biggest downfall.”
“Hmm.”
“And I need to put you first. You were the one who was with me when I had absolutely nothing and I lost sight of that. Anytime I needed you, you were there but I didn’t give you that same treatment in return.”
“I want to believe you, I really do because I miss you, but… I just don’t know.”
“Y/N, please. Things are going to be different this time.”
“Maybe, but I don’t know if I’m at that point where I want to find out or not.” You answered being completely honest.
“Well, how long do you think that will take? You know I’m willing to wait. I legit do not want anyone else.”
“Only time will tell.” You shrugged while looking at him.
When he didn’t say anything else, you simply let go of his hand and began to get up.
“Wait, where are you going?”
“I did what you asked and I came and heard what you had to say, did I not?”
“Yes, but…”
“And now I’m leaving.”
“Baby girl, just…”
“Just, what, Jack? Just what? You said your piece and I’ve said mine. When I’m ready to take you back, you’ll know.” 
“I love you and I want this. I want us.” He said as he grabbed your hand and squeezed it.
“Yes, you’ve made that very clear and you’ve done it more than once.”
“At least just spend the night with me, let me take you out.”
“Maybe some other time. I’m pretty tired. I am pregnant, the last time I checked.”
“Okay, I get that. Some other time then.”
Jack then stood up and gave you another long embrace as he leaned down to kiss your forehead.
You then felt him cup your cheek and knew he wanted to kiss you. You wanted to kiss him too, but you definitely weren’t letting him back in that easily.
Instead of meeting his lips with yours, he met your cheek since you had turned your head and you heard him sigh.
“When I fully forgive you, you can give me as many kisses as your heart desires, but until then I need you to remember something for me.”
“What is it?
“Remember one thing, I'm not your girl.” You whispered against his lips before smirking and laughing to yourself as you made your way to the door of the dressing room.
“Drive Safe tonight, Jackman.” Was the last thing you said before you disappeared on the other side of the door leaving him absolutely speechless.
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icaruspendragon · 5 months
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im sorry to ask but i dont know what else to do—how did you do it how did you dig yourself out because it feels like i am choking on dirt and people keep shoveling it onto me and i miss her so much and i dont know how to make this feeling stop. she was my best friend. ive never lived in a world without her before. how did you do it. how are you doing it
grief is so hard and so heavy when we first meet it. it feels like all our arms will ever hold for the rest of forever. and it is, in a sense. once we pick it up, we never really set it down. not fully.
and I don't think it gets lighter, I think we somehow, impossibly, get stronger.
there's lots of metaphors for grief. that's one of them. another one I like to use is that it feels like you're in the grave with them. like lazarus. like yourself. waiting for someone to raise you from the dead. to raise you both.
I've learned a lot about crawling out of the grave. more than I would have ever wanted to learn. like how emptiness is actually quite heavy. or how to pretend like you feel half-alive. but I think the most important thing I've learned is that somedays, we inexplicably end up back in it. and that sucks.
because we just spent months clawing our way through the bugs and the earth. because our soldier-hands have finally breached the surface. because the sun is finally caressing our hell-fresh faces. because for the first time in months we feel like we can finally breath. and then, suddenly, we're right back in the terrible thick of it.
those days make it feel like I'm sisyphus and grave dirt is my rock. or like I'm prometheus and the darkness is my eagle.
but then it's tuesday.
which is to say my brother died on my 25th birthday, a monday. and that day is now a memory that's fuzzy around the edges. single snapshots I know are connected, but I couldn't tell you how. I remember my mother standing in my bedroom and tears and family and phone calls and cleaning my living room because I didn't know what to do with my hands. I remember going to my grandmothers and my phone vibrating off the table and leaving to go get coffee because I couldn't sit still. I remember joking, trying to joke. trying to do whatever I could to make sense of that impossible day. I remember checking my phone and reading and rereading the messages, a mixed bag of congratulations for surviving another year and condolences that my brother didn't, I remember not knowing how to respond to any of them. so I didn't. I remember being surrounded by so many people doing nothing but extending love and kindness to me and never feeling more alone. the world was ending and I was alone. I thought that day would go on forever.
but it didn't.
it ended, as all things do. monday was over and my first day as an only child was done.
and suddenly it was tuesday. and everything was different but also exactly the same.
it was tuesday and my brother was dead. I was so heavy when I woke up that first tuesday. so heavy and confused. I thought the world had ended. it surely felt like it had. but it hadn't. because the world couldn't have ended on monday.
not if it was tuesday.
it was tuesday and my brother was dead but the world wasn't ending. monday should have been our demise, but it wasn't. and it hasn't. and it won't. because just as sure as we have mondays, we'll always have tuesdays.
that's something I've taken a strange comfort in, knowing that we'll always have tuesdays.
the feeling never stops. but I think that's okay. because you're only feeling that way because there was love first. and as much as what I felt on that first tuesday hurts, as much as it suffocates, as much as it consumes, I'd take the hurt and the suffocation and the consumption because the love I felt first will always, always be worth it.
tuesdays will always be worth it.
like yeah, if I loved less, it wouldn't hurt this bad. but I don't want to live in a world where I have to love less. where I was loved less.
I'll take the pain. I'll take the grave days. I'll take the rock. I'll take the eagle. I'll take apocalyptic, earthshaking mondays. I'll take every last wretched bit because goddamn what a miracle it is to love so bad it hurts this big.
I hold that love, his love for me and my love for him, a love that's now become our love in the cage of my ribs while I'm in the cage of the grave. and I dig.
it's monday and I dig.
I dig.
and then tuesday comes.
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animexts · 3 months
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Broken hearts - Chapter 1
Summary: Ran Haitani did the worst shit of his life by cheating on his wife Y/n, but she forgave him and everything was fine now... right?
Pairing: Ran Haitani X Wife!Reader | Kakucho Hitto X Reader
Word count: 1.479 | Masterlist
A/n: Hope you like this! Comment what you think, and HAPPY NEW YEAR!
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Ran doesn't really know what he's feeling in this situation, he's sure he just saw Kakuchu giving his wife a kiss, but... would he do something like that? What is he thinking, of course he would do.
Ran is a shit, he knows that, but he was sure of it when his wife found out about his cheating.
Y/n was the light of his life, his ray of sunshine, I know a reason to smile and live, and this was the worst mistake he ever made in his entire life, he is aware of that.
This was probably one of the happiest days of his life but... What was this feeling he was feeling now?
They talked, she cried and hit him, but after a long time of trying and trying, Ran got her second chance.
Ran was almost sure he saw Kakucho speak close to his wife's ear, he was almost sure he saw her blush, was that right?
Yes, he was a little drunk and they were in a crowded club, but he didn't think his eyes would deceive him that much.
"Ran, are you deaf or something?" He wakes up with Sanzu screaming in his ears.
"What?" Ran says looking back at his letters.
"It's your turn Ran." Rindou says staring at his older brother.
"Yeah, I actually don't know if I want to continue this match."
"Haitani already given up?" He hears a voice behind him and feels his stomach drop or realize it was Kakucho's voice.
"And where were you Heartthrob?" Sanzu asks taking his pills out of his pocket.
Kakucho smiles passionately, as if she's remembering where she was just a few seconds ago.
"Bastard"
"And you're still seeing that girl Ran?" Kokonoi asks with a mischievous smile on her face.
"Who? My wife?"
"You know better, one of the girls from Sanzu's clubs." Ran looks at him in surprise.
"You know better, stop saying that shit before she hears it and thinks I'm seeing someone else." Ran says seriously.
"Oh please Ran, we all know you can't keep your dick in your pants." Sanzu says laughing.
"Shut the fuck up, she's already suffered enough for this shit." Ran speaks and hears Kakucho laugh softly next to her.
"I think Y/n is a much stronger woman than you imagine Haitani." Kakucho speaks and sits across from Ran.
"Do you suddenly know my wife well?" Ran asks feeling her blood boil.
"Maybe you don't know her very much."
"What the fuck does that mean?" Ran asks, already getting up.
"Calm down hothead, I'm sure Kakucho is just trying to say that it was so stupid of you to exchange the cure for the disease." Kokonoi making everyone at the table laugh.
"Because you guys don't mind your own fucking business." Ran says throwing the cards and leaving there.
Rindou chases after his brother, dodging people he has no idea who they are.
After spending a few minutes looking for Ran, he finds his brother near the toilets with his head resting on the wall and his eyes closed.
"Hey, what happened? What's got you so riled up?"
Ran opens his eyes when he hears his brother's voice and rubs his hands over his face.
"I think... I think Y/n and Kakucho are having an affair."
"Are you saying that because of what he said at the table?"
"I think I saw the two of them kissing." Ran says this, feeling his voice tremble a little.
Rindou's eyes widen when he hears this, he's surprised but at the same time he's not, it's been many months since Ran was "mistreating" his wife.
"Well are you... sad about it?" Rindou asks, trying to read his brother's expression.
"Of course I am, she's my wife brother, how could that not destroy me?" Ran asks, looking incredulously at Rindou, who shrugs.
"You were seeing another woman Ran."
"But I'm not anymore, Rindou I love Y/n with all my heart, we've resolved this and everything I'm doing in my life is for her." Hearing this, Rindou mocks his brother.
Ran was very clever sometimes, but he was also dumber than ever.
"Do you think it's easy to forget a betrayal?" Hearing this, Ran clenches his fists and leaves in search of his wife.
Now, all he wanted was to find his wife and get out of there as quickly as possible.
When he finds her, she's drinking and laughing with some other women.
"Baby, let's go." He says, looking seriously at his wife, who stops smiling when she sees Ran approaching.
"Right, bye girls." Y/n picks up her coat from the chair and walks straight past Ran towards the car without waiting for him.
If he was Kakucho, would she wait? No, not Ran, she's your wife, not his.
Ran turns and walks quickly to catch up with his wife.
"Hey doll, I almost didn't see you today." Sanzu says, stopping in front of Y/n and hugging her.
Y/n just smiles and hugs Sanzu too, and when Ran looks away, he notices Kakucho gazing lovingly at his wife still hugging Sanzu.
"Holy shit, I'm going to kill this guy."
"Come on honey, let go of her, you fucking addict." Ran says, pulling Sanzu out of Y/n's arms and taking her hand lovingly.
"I know the way Ran." She says, letting go of Ran's hand and continuing to walk on her own.
Now that they were both in the car, all Ran wanted was to hear something from his wife, even if it was her swearing at him, anything.
"Was your week good, dear?" Ran says, looking at her.
"Yes, Ran, I'm tired." Y/n says cheekily.
"Well, thanks for coming with me even though you're tired."
"No problem, I missed some of them too." Y/n smiles and Ran grips the steering wheel.
Did she mean Kakucho?
At that moment Ran feels like he could beat someone up, and even that wouldn't be enough to get all the sadness and anger out of him.
Y/n feels his cell phone turn over and smiles when he sees a message from Kakucho.
"I know I've already told you this, but you looked so beautiful, have a good night princess."
"I got to see you, so obviously I'll have a good night."
Back at the club, Kakucho smiles like a teenager in love when he reads Y/n's message.
"Are you in love?" Kokonoi says, smiling and pulling Kakucho out of his enchanted little world.
"Maybe I am, is there a problem?"
"Maybe if she's already married."
Kakucho looks surprised at Kokonoi, who is still smiling.
"I just want to make her happy." He says softly and Kokonoi laughs out loud.
"I know that, she's a great girl and if Haitani was foolish not to realize that, then fuck him."
Kakucho remains silent and Kokonoi continues talking.
"What if he hits her?" Kakucho feels his heart race at the thought of that possibility.
"If he touches a single strand of her hair, I'll kill him without fear."
268 notes · View notes
genericpuff · 6 months
Text
Lore Olympus will be officially ending in 2024.
While this is vague both in Rachel's responses (as always) and the actual specific timeline, considering this is the final 'arc' and most of Rachel's arcs rarely go any longer than 12-15 episodes, I have the sneaking suspicion she's going to try to wrap this up by March/April. That's just a prediction, mind you, it could just as well go on throughout the entire year of 2024.
That said, it's wild to see it finally confirmed, like a weight has finally been lifted of our shoulders. Many of us have been speculating on it for a while now that LO would undoubtedly get dragged out as it's Webtoon's golden goose and clearly Rachel's lifeline to the industry.
Lore Olympus has been a part of my life since 2019, and an even larger part of it in the last year and a half when I joined the critical community. It's going to be weird to live in a world where LO just doesn't update.
Of course, as mentioned in the article, there's still the matter of the physical books which are still FAR behind the webtoon version, and the TV show which they swear is still happening (but we all know it's not happening lmao).
So I don't think this will be the end of WT milking it for all its worth, but I am interested to see what happens to WT when they don't have their golden goose on a leash and chain anymore. They've sunk so much money and priority ad space into LO that even other Originals creators can't stand the comic due to how much its undercut their own opportunities. I'm hoping this will be a wake-up call to WT to give more attention to their series that are struggling and deserve to be seen, rather than focus all of their attention into one series that's barely got a pulse to speak of.
Of course, I'm sure people are wondering, "What about the fandom communities? What about antiLO/ULO?"
Listen, this isn't the first fandom I've taken part in, though it's certainly the one I've been the most directly active in with the essays I write and the stuff I do through Rekindled.
But if being in fandoms has taught me anything, it's that it doesn't matter how long a series has been gone. If there are people who still love it - or love to hate it - taking part in discussion, that discussion will continue to thrive. A series existing in hindsight is just as much a reason for participation as an active series existing in the present day. If anything, a series falling into the realm of 'hindsight' can give us the room we need to sit and reflect on what the series actually did, and what we were left with in the end. It's never stopped the folks who still talk about long-ago-completed series like The Office, House M.D., and Avatar: The Last Airbender.
So if you're new to the LO critical community, or asking yourself if it's still going to be "worth it" to take part in the fandom after LO is done - it's as worth it as you make it. There will always be something worth discussing in this fandom if we're wanting to discuss it.
As for me, well... I'm just getting started.
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when-november-ends · 1 year
Text
witchcraft things
that didn't work for me
and why
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- kitchen witchcraft
i love cooking and i love working with plants, however incorporating spells into my food didn't work for me. i got way too distracted by the spell part, that i completely forgot to make the food taste good. and as much as i love magic, it took the fun out of cooking for me. because now, cooking wasn't something fun where i could experiment with flavors and textures, it was something i had to put thought into beforehand. and i like to be spontaneous with my cooking.
- protection spells
protection spells seem to be the most important part of the witchcraft community. and i do think it's important to know how protection magic works, but it's also very unnecessary to have protections up 24/7 if you're not famous or have many enemies. i tend to forget about my protection spells, so they just sit on my altar, untouched for months and i forget to make new ones. hasn't hurt me so far tho, so i'll be saving those up for when and if i actually need them.
- casting a circle
not gonna lie, i tried that once and never again. it felt so pretentious to me.. like i was in Chilling Adventures of Sabrina. and not in a good way. i stumbled across that practice on witchtok first, that was when i thought i was wrong for practicing my way and not how other people said i should. i don't think casting a circle is a bad thing to do, but it absolutely is a bad thing to do for me.
- bowl spells
bowl spells are one of my favorite kinds of spells because they're interactive. you put things in, you take things out. the energy doesn't feel stagnant and the spell is always working it's magic as long as you interact with it. ....but unfortunately my adhd made it very clear to me that those kinds of spells aren't something that works for me. i forget about them 5 minutes after i made them and they never get interacted with, so they don't do much of what they're supposed to. i would definitely recommend them to people who remember to take out and put in stuff tho, because the concept is great.
- scrying
gods, did i want that to work. divination is my favorite kind of witchcraft and i'm great at it! so when i learned about scrying, it was something i immediately got interested in and tried. i tried fire and water. fire worked a bit better, because the flames are dancing and water is reflective. that meant for me, i was always seeing things in it that were physically there, and couldn't concentrate on the scrying part. honestly i don't really remember why the fire method didn't work out, but i assume i got distracted really fast or lost in my thoughts.
- veiling
veiling can be done for many reasons. mine was, that i wanted to use it as a way to protect myself from all the different types of energy in public places. every person has their own life, with their own problems and their own current state of being. and since i have social anxiety, i thought veiling would be worth a try so that public places perhaps wouldn't get overwhelming as fast. well, that backfired because before i could try it, i realized i was trans and the head covering made me feel very dysphoric when i put it on at home. i never attempted anything similar again after that.
- ancestor work
i lost someone really close to me in early 2020. she wasn't a blood relative, but she was my dad's best friend, our landlord (who lived in the same house as we did by the way) and she saw me grow up since i was a baby. i was so desperate to try and talk to her. i tried to reach her myself, i asked other witches for help, but it never worked. after a while i decided to let her be, because the constant getting my hopes up and then being disappointed didn't help my mental health. i just wanted to know if she was okay now, but i think i just have to trust that she is. as for my other ancestors, i don't know anything about them and i am not really interested in finding out. i wasn't close with any of my great grandparents because we saw each other about once a year until they died. they didn't do anything wrong, but i don't want to force a connection.
- dragon work
damn. i really love dragons. all my life and with all my heart. and i truly believe that they are out there (not physically, like dinosaurs were, but in a similar way the gods are out there). i've done a lot of research on the topic, but my mental health got in the way. i don't have the concentration to reach out to them, nor will i be able to dedicate a specific amount of time to them regularly, which i feel like they won't like. i will try again when and if i get better, but until then it goes on this list of witchcraft things that didn't work for me and why.
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clanwarrior-tumbly · 1 year
Note
Request: Wally with a Child!Reader who snuck backstage during a special live taping of Welcome Home to see him, as he is their favorite character
Oh this idea is cute!!! I like the trope of humans and puppets/cartoons coexisting (like in who framed roger rabbit) so im absolutely using that here
........
"Aaaand that's a wrap! Thank you all for coming to our exclusive live taping of Welcome Home! Be sure to gather up all your things before leaving through the exits on either side of the studio. Wally and his friends appreciate each and every one of you visiting their neighborhood!!"
The director's voice echoed over the intercom as the audience's applause gradually died down, with you being the last one to clap. Your hands almost hurt, but you didn't care. The smile on your face was huge
You still couldn't believe that you and your family got to actually see the entire Welcome Home cast in-person!
Especially Wally.
It's probably lame to say you liked the main character as a majority of the show's fans probably did...but it was true. You loved listening to his narrations, seeing him paint, and getting into all sorts of shenanigans with the gang.
During this live taping--which you won tickets to--he interacted with the audience a lot with his sweet eyes and warm smile, taking all of you on a journey into his world. You could see he was really happy to interact with all of you.
And that's why you were kinda sad when the curtains closed and the camera crew started packing up things, realizing it was already over. They still had a lot of work to do before they could put the episode on the usual television station Welcome Home was featured on, so they made sure every guest was out of the studio.
But fortunately, none of them noticed you sneaking down the steps and managing to find the door conveniently labelled "Backstage Access".
You knew you could get into a lot of trouble, though your family was catching up with some friends and their children. So surely they won't notice you were gone for quite a while.
You just really wanted to see Wally and personally tell him you're his biggest fan. It would make his day!
Eventually you did find him sitting by himself at the makeup booth, in front of a mirror surrounded by lights. His blue cardigan was draped over the chair, and he rolled up his sleeves before undoing the ascot around his neck. All the while, he smiled at his reflection dreamily with half-lidded eyes.
He looked a little tired, but happy nevertheless.
You would have approached him...if not for the director abruptly showing up, a stack of script papers in his hand. He seemed upset and annoyed, compared to the cheery tone he had earlier, so you just hid behind one of the large loudspeakers, eavesdropping on their conversation.
"Look, Wally. How many times do we have to go over this?" He huffed. "You need to ease up on the excessive eye contact. It's been giving a few of my cameramen the creeps."
"Oh, I'm awfully sorry, sir. But..I thought that's what people liked.." Pouting slightly, the puppet looked at him, resting his elbow on the armchair to prop his chin up. "Where else can I look if not the camera or adoring audience? I can't just stare at the ceiling, y'know."
"..well it helps to blink every once in a while. That's what we humans do so it doesn't look like we're staring into each other's souls....like you're doing right now."
"Ah...am I..? Haha.." Wally laughed uncomfortably, forcing himself to blink as he fidgeted with the ascot in his hands. He looked down at the floor. "Sorry. It's just a habit-"
"Don't make excuses, Wally. I know eye contact is essential to your character but...I'm sure you wouldn't feel comfortable if I stared at you like that all the time, right?"
"Actually that wouldn't bother me at all." He gazed at the director with a polite smile, only for it to drop as he looked furious.
"Are you being sarcastic?"
"...no? I'm only being honest, sir."
"...whatever. I have my lunch break now, so just...try to get what we discussed through your head." The director huffed, shaking his head before he turned and walked away, bumping into one of his assistants.
"You good, boss?"
"Huh? Yeah, I'm fine..it's that damn puppet. I keep reminding him about his staring problem, but it's like I'm talking to a brick wall.."
Although he could barely hear them, Wally knew that he made the director upset...again. And that turned his usual smile upside down as he looked back into the mirror.
"I don't get it...everybody loved the show..." He muttered to himself, touching up his hair, but not even seeing his own reflection could cheer him up. "So why is he so...angry at me all the time?"
You frowned slightly as you watched his shoulders slump, hating how sad he sounded. That director of his was so cruel! He didn't know what he was talking about!
Determined to help your favorite character feel better, you finally gained the confidence to say something and emerge from your hiding spot.
"What am I doing wrong?"
"I...think you're doing your best, Wally. Don't listen to him."
"Huh..?" Surprised, he looked over and saw you shyly standing beside the loudspeaker, blinking in bewilderment that you were able to sneak back here unnoticed. "Oh hello, Neighbor--! I mean..." He paused, a bashful smile on his face. "S-Sorry, it's-
"Habit? Don't worry, it's okay." You reassured, stepping closer to him as you tried your best to contain your excitement. "You can call me Neighbor..or [y/n], if you wanna."
"[Y/n]..that's a nice name." He nodded, although his gaze turned serious as his eyes flickered left and right, before he leaned down to get closer to you. "It's nice to meet you, but I'm afraid you've must've taken a wrong turn. You can't be back here."
"I know, but..I really wanted to see you! You're my favorite and..I didn't like what that mean man said to you."
"Oh..him? Don't fret, my friend." Wally softly chuckled. "That "mean man" is my director and...he's only suggesting how I can improve myself! He can be blunt sometimes, but I have to listen to him. Just like how you have to listen to your parents and teachers."
"Yeah.....but he didn't have to be so rude." You huffed, hands on your hips. "If he has a problem with your staring, it's his fault, not yours. He's just a big ol' dummy."
He was amused by your attempts to defend him so fiercely, and he couldn't help but break into an even bigger smile.
"I agree, he is a big dummy..but that's a secret between you and me." He winked, before hopping down from his chair, opening his arms up to you. "Well thank you for lifting my spirits, dear [y/n]. I wish I had something for you, but...this is all I can offer."
"That's okay! I'm happy to help!" Nodding, you eagerly hugged him, feeling how soft his plush body was. "You're...not gonna tell anyone I'm here, will you?"
"Nope. Why would I do that to my number one fan?"
All you could do was beam at his compliment.
This was truly the best day ever. Not only did you get to meet Wally face-to-face...but you also helped him feel better!
Sneaking backstage was absolutely worth it.
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qxldnya · 1 year
Text
Enemies to lovers
Part 1 part 2 part 3
Jude Bellingham x baller!reader
Taglist now open
Wc: 2k
Warning: past flashback, swearing
⚠️ A/n: PLS STOP SPAMMING ME! I beg man 😭 i will post parts as soon as i can and people spamming me everywhere only puts me off this. If you wanna be apart of the taglist comment down below<3 THANK YOU FOR 900 FOLLOWERS <3
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"A favor?"
You repeat, the words feeling thick and heavy on your tongue. A part of you suspects that he's about to pull a fast one and make some belittling joke at your expense.
Or he's going to ask you to do something completely impossible for him, just so he can prove his point that, haha, you fucked up!
Because there's really no conceivable reason that he would-
"You need me to act as your boyfriend for the wedding thing. Fine. But I need you to..."
He trails off, and you stare in awe as a light pink hue dusts his cheeks. Is Jude... blushing? You'd seen him blush out of rage before, many times actually, but never... shyness? Is that what this even is?
"...It'll be easier if I just explain it first."
Nodding, you feel like you're stuck in some kind of trance as he sits down on top of the desk next to yours. He sighs again, and then those blood-red eyes are focused on you.
"My parents are... fuckin' nutcases. I don't know if you've heard much about them, but they're kinda well- respected in England. Not like your aunt, just pretty influential in politics n' shit."
You openly stare at him, head tilted.
"I, uh, don't follow."
A glare. "So let me fucking finish then, eh?"
Bristling, you bite your tongue and grit out a strained apology. He just rolls his eyes in response and continues on.
"Anyways, my mom's been creepily invested in like, making sure I have a girlfriend so I can 'continue the family lineage.' I'm still 19 so it doesn't make much sense, but it's just for her to show it off I guess."
He makes air quotes with his fingers as he speaks, and you almost want to laugh a bit because the idea of Jude having a wife and kids is just... unrealistic. He looks away, eyes hardening as his tone shifts into something more somber. "So then I had a girlfriend, but we uh, broke up a few months ago."
Hold the fucking phone. Jude had a girlfriend? Like, as in living breathing girl? Who was interested in actually dating him?
Your attempt to conceal the look of shock clearly written across on your face utterly fails, because Jude instantly notices before you can even try to correct yourself. The look he gives you makes your spine go rigid.
"The fuck you looking like that for?"
"Nothing," you say a bit too quickly. "so then what about the rest of the favor?" He scowls for a few moments longer, as if he's wondering if he really wants to pursue an argument right now, then thankfully drops the issue altogether and continues talking. You let out a breath you weren't even aware you'd been holding, feeling slightly victorious at the fact that for once you've managed to avoid a giant mess. It's a nice change of pace.
"As I was saying, we broke up, but my mom doesn't know that. Hell, she didn't even meet my girlfriend to begin with. Was just happy to know I had one, and then bragged about it to all her friends or whatever."
Your fingers begin to drum wildly against your desk. You've got a feeling you know where this is going, and it does not appeal to you.
"But you're single now, so she doesn't know?"
"Yeah. Which is where you come in."
Yep. Laughing nervously, you stand from your seat and grab your bag, slinging it over your shoulder.
"Yeah, look... I know I fucked up with the whole phone call thing, and I'm sorry about that, but I am NOT going to be your pretend girlfriend for god knows how long just because your mom-"
He makes a face, appearing as if you've just gravely offended him.
"What? Why the fuck would I ever want that? Idiot, it's only going to be for one night, not a year."
A short laugh escapes his lips, curt and blunt. “You think I'd enjoy having you of all people as my girlfriend?"
You wince, because ouch, but at the same time, you'd probably reply with the exact same thing had he been the one to insinuate that. So it's fair, you suppose. "Only one night?" Is your hesitant response. "My mom's got a stupid party with her fellow political snobs coming up in a week," he grumbles, leg swinging impatiently.
"I just need you to pose as my girlfriend for the party. That's all."
Mulling over your options, you bite your lip and give him a skeptical glance.
"So that's it? And then you'll- you'll do the wedding thing with me?"
Jude nods. You then start to feel slightly bad, because here he is only requiring you to act as his significant other for one night, whereas you'll be having him act for a week... "Are you sure it's a fair exchange?" You mumble, nervously picking at the seams of your shorts. Rolling his eyes for the billionth time, he hops off of the desk and snorts.
"I get out of having my mom scream at me and get a free vacation to fucking Malibu?"
"The Bahamas," you correct him.
Another eye roll. You silently hope that they stay stuck in the back of his head someday.
"Whatever, same difference. So yeah, it's a pretty fair exchange.
I mean, we just fake "break up" after the wedding or whatever." He hums to himself a bit, before grimacing slightly. His next words are nothing more but a mumble, and you strain to hear them.
"But, if anything, we're both kinda getting fucked over here." You narrow your eyes suspiciously. "Hey, hold on, I never explicitly agreed to all of this. What do you mean by that?"
A sort of realization dawns on him. He slowly faces you before flashing a sarcastic grin in response, his sharp canines now visible at the corners of his mouth.
"Come on, you didn't think this was gonna be as easy as just saying we're dating and expecting people to believe it, did you?"
Heat rises to your cheeks. "I- I don't follow." "It means," he says, taking a few slow steps towards you. "that you and I are gonna have to actually play the part. I mean if we're both all stiff-shouldered and awkward, ya think your aunt is really be convinced that we're actually dating?"
"I mean, it- it doesn't matter too much, right?"
God, you hope your face isn't as red as it feels. And then Jude is directly in front of you, both of his hands squarely planted on the desk as he looms over you. You're now certain that it is as red as it feels. It's unclear to you if you're more flustered over the blatant invasion of your personal space, or... no, you're not finishing that thought.
"Here's the thing, 'babe,' " he growls, his voice strained. "you can try and convince your aunt about whatever the fuck you want. I'm definitely not complaining if I don't have to bring the whole romance shtick along on the trip. That would be ideal, actually, cause there's no way I'm trying to shack up with you."
His face is now only inches from yours, hot breath slightly fanning across your cheeks. You think your heart has leapt straight into your throat. Since when has it been this hard to breathe?
"But with my family, you're not getting away with any of that half-assed crap. So whether you like it or not - and I can assure you that I for one don't -we're gonna have to get used to acting like a real couple. Otherwise, this isn't gonna work. Understand?"
You physically cannot move, only offering a blank stare in response. He smirks in a patronizing sort of way, seemingly mistaking your bewildered reaction for one of fear. As if he expected you to react this way all along.
"Unless, of course, princess prude here can't do that. So make your choice."
Hold on, is he trying to scare you off?
Oh, he definitely is.
He takes your momentary silence as an answer and chuckles.
"That's what I thought."
You've been described as a lot of things that you can agree with. Easily flustered, hard-headed, passionate... the list goes on. You've also been described as incredibly stubborn. Petty, too. And those statements are just as factual.
"Well, if you change your mind, I'll probably have until tomorrow before I go looking for a stand-in" Jude shrugs, finally backing up from your desk and turning toward the door.
"but otherwise, if you can't do it, we're probably done here-"
All things considered, you're guessing that he probably didn't expect you to stand from your seat and grab him roughly by the back of his shirt. He lets out a startled noise as you yank him towards you, forcing him to face you as your fist bunches in his collar. Pulling him down to meet you eye-to-eye, your response is forced from your lips with a ferocity that surprises even you.
"Try me." You regret the words the momont they leave your mouth. But you're too busy relishing in Jude startled expression to really care. He stares at you for a few moments longer, seemingly dumbfounded, before abruptly prying your hand off of him with a look of disdain. He smoothes out his shirt with a smile.
"Damn, didn't know princess prude had some balls on her."
Trying to maintain your false facade of confidence, you cross your arms stubbornly.
"The joke's only funny once. Don't call me that." And for a moment you swear he smirks, a smirk that's not full of hatred or sarcasm for once, but it's quickly replaced with his normal resting bitch face that you've seen so frequently over the course of the past semester. "Alright," he grumbles.
"Let me give you my number so we can plan shit out." You hand him your phone, and he quickly punches in his contact before carelessly tossing it back to you. It almost slips from your grasp, and you glare daggers at him as you fumble to recover it.
"Watch it, asshole." He just sniggers.
"Yeah, whatever. Anyways I'm blasting this dump. Later, princess prude." "I said, don't fucking call me that!"
You shout after him as he exits the room, fists trembling with anger.
"Whatever the princess commands."
"You're not funny!"
"Don't care." It's the last thing you hear before he disappears out of the room and down the hallway, leaving you to stand in place, furious, and process what exactly you just agreed to. Jude is your fake boyfriend. What the fuck?
It feels taboo to even think about. An even scarier realization that hits you with the speed of a freight train is that to everyone else, Jude is now your real boyfriend.
Crouching down, you wrap your arms around your knees and resist the urge to scream. By the time you make it through the rest of your classes and back to your apartment, you think you're about to drop dead on your feet. You'd been too focused on what had happened back in the empty room with Jude to really pay attention to any of your lectures, instead debating whether or not you should just call the whole thing off and stick to trying to pay your aunt back, or roll with it and move onto the next set of problems that would arise from sticking with it. Is he still going to tell people you two aren't actually dating? Are you still going to be outed as a liar?
God, you hope not. Hell, you'd even written out a whole pros and cons list during your last class, which you were now reviewing from the privacy and comfort of your bed.
PROS: No Tom (Jude is somehow more bearable, cause at least he's not a creep) Aunt + Mom are happy (no guilt-tripping) Don't have to pay aunt Sylvie back VACATION TO BAHAMAS??? Maybe won't be outed for "lying" (did I lie tho) Not permanent I'm technically doing something nice for someone else at
I'm technically doing something nice for someone else at the same time :))))
(kind of, fuck you Jude)
CONS: He's not Tom but he's also still Jude and that means that I have to deal with the asshole for basically a month
Family is gonna ask questions Prep stuff for the fake dating I guess Oh god do I have to kiss him??
Might still have to deal with the Rice thing and being called a liar Have to deal with HIS family asking questions And... that's about it.
At first glance, you try to convince yourself that both sides are semi-even, but... the cons are mostly superficial or just plain uncertain, now that you look at them. And the pros are stupidly strong and... shit.... The only big thing you'll be sacrificing is your dignity. And your time and patience. No, no. That's still worth something right? Maybe not. Are you seriously about to go along with this? And as if on cue, your phone buzzes with a text from Jude.
From: Jude
6:17 PM
Hey, I told Rice the rumors are true. Might be easier for you and I to keep our story straight. We can just tell him we broke up
You stare quizzically at the message for a few moments, sort of in awe. He still sounds as harsh as ever but this is... oddly considerate of him.
Did someone steal his phone or something?
From: Jude
6:19 PM
Your name in my phone is Princess Prude, just thought you should know.
Never mind.
Definitely the same guy.
From: You
6:20 PM
Why
From: Jude
6:20 PM
Cause it pisses you off
From: you
6:21 PM
was about to thank you for what I thought was a really nice gesture but now all I have to say is fuck you
You make a new contact name for him and send a screenshot.
From: Judyhoe
6:22 PM
The fuck? "Judyhoe?" You've got some meedy insults yk. And the feeling is mutual btw
He sends a middle finger emoji with nothing else, and you suppose that's the end of the conversation.
But despite all the insults, his infuriating personality, and the shit you're probably going to have to put up with...
At least he's not Tom
-
Naturally, Mason had been the first in your admittedly small social circle to know the truth; he was probably your closest friend on camp at this point. And considering the fact that you had kind of ghosted her since the end of training, you supposed it was only right to fill him in on what was going on.
That, and you weren't sure if you'd remain mentally stable enough if you'd kept all of this a secret.
"Are you shitting me?" Was the first thing he'd said when you'd finally picked up her calls. The whole ordeal had been explained over text - a tedious process, looking back.
But you'd just been too embarrassed to recount everything out loud.
"No," you mumble, rolling over in your bed so you can stare at the ceiling. "I swear I'm not."
You hear him inhale sharply, before he starts laughing like a maniac. Reddening, you clench your fists as you sit up in bed, shouting words of indignation into the speaker as he continues to cackle at your expense.
"You and Jude-" he seems to be almost laughing through tears.
"You guys are faking... This can't be real. You guys are like Arsenal and spurs!" Grumbling, you slouch.
"I know, and yes, it is real."
"Are- are you two sharing a fucking BED on your vacation?" He howls, trying to catch his breath, and you try your damndest not to hang up right then and there as your face goes aflame at his suggestion.
"No!" Comes your high-pitched squeal.
"Me? Share a bed with that asshole? He would probably suffocate me in my sleep!"
"I dunno, maybe it's the perfect time to figure out if one of you has a degrading kink-" Grinding your teeth, you glare down at your phone.
"If you don't shut up, I'm going to end the call." he half-heartedly apologizes as his laughter dissolves into giggles.
You just sigh, one hand rubbing at your temples. This is going to be a painfully long month.
"So..." he starts. "how do you honestly feel about it?" his tone is genuinely curious this time.
Humming, you search for an answer. "I don't know," is your honest reply. "I'm relieved, because it kinda solved three problems all at once but... I'm also really dreading the whole thing. I'm scared something's gonna get fucked up along the way."
A short laugh. "Fair enough. I'll be surprised if you two don't kill each other before the whole party thing." You silently agree.
"So like, to convince his parents, is he gonna have to practice kissing you or something?"
The sound that leaves your mouth is nothing short of a squeak. Oh, you can practically hear him grinning over the phone.
"Oh? Looks like someone isn't prepared. What if he pulls you onto his lap, huh? Wraps his arms around your waist..."
"That's not- Shut up!" is your garbled reply, throat constricting at the thought. "If I didn't know any better, you sound flustered~" he purrs.
No, you protest very firmly. You aren't flustered. You're just grossed out. The thought is appalling to you. One hundred percent. He can tell that you're lying. And shit, why the fuck is it making you flustered? He's a fucking dickhead. And you genuinely do hate him. But he's a hot dickhead, a voice in the back of your head whispers, and you try to beat it over the head with an imaginary baseball bat. Ok. Fine. He's attractive. You'll admit it. And you hate it, because otherwise, you wouldn't be nearly as flushed thinking about all of this.
And why do all the assholes get to be attractive??
You don't realize you've said all of this aloud to Mason until he bursts out laughing again, much to your embarrassment, and then you have to spend a whole five minutes shutting him up. He's not going to let you live this down. Not for a long while. The two of you continue to talk about the logistics of the arrangement for about an hour longer - you pointedly ignore a few of the sly jokes he slips in here and there - before he has to leave for his family dinner
And when the call finally ends, you can't help but feel a tiny bit relieved that this isn't a secret you need to carry alone anymore.
Your phone buzzes with a text.
From: money mase
8:49 PM Just always remember the importance of condoms and good ol birth control
You should've just kept your mouth shut. From: You
8:50 PM I have no idea why you're so convinced that we're going to do anything. This is literally a contract out of convenience.
From: money mase
8:51 PM That's what they all say, mate
From: You
8:52 PM The day I fuck Jude is the day you finally confess to Declan
He doesn't respond to that one. The rest of the night passes without much of a hitch. You do get a few curious messages on your social media asking about Jude, but you elect to ignore them for now, favoring the sweet embrace of sleep.
And when you finally manage to drift off to sleep after what feels like ages of constant tossing and turning, your dreams are filled with brown eyes that burn through your body over and over, until nothing of you remains but charred ash.
From: Judyhoe
8:15 AM Meet me today at my apartment after lunch so we can plan shit out for the party. I've only got one massage class, so I'll be here all day. And don't keep me waiting
Waking up to a text from Jude feels like whiplash. (a/n referenced the best movie to exist;)
And waking up to a text from Jude demanding you to come to his apartment, of all places, more so. And what does he mean by "plan shit out?" You mull over whether or not you should fake sick and bail, gingerly sipping at your coffee. But then comes the reminder that all of this technically counts as an obligation now, thanks to your poor critical thinking skills that are permanently coupled with your big fat mouth
You told him to send his adress. He does, and you can't help but gawk when you recognize the location because holy shit, it's in a really nice area in London. You always seemed to forget that some on the team lives by themselves rather than on camp like you. Simply out of convenience. Your cat rubs against your ankles with a purr, and you pick her up, scratching behind her ears as you silently pray that today won't be a complete disaster on your end.
Unfortunately, things are already looking glum. The stares are even more prominent today. Probably a result of Jude's confirmation with Declan about it all. You even overhear a huddled group of girls whispering as you pass, shooting you a few glares. You try your best to ignore it all, but by the time you slide into your seat at lunch, you want to do nothing but hide.
It'll pass, you think to yourself, desperate for consolation. He's basically a high class celebrity, so of course it's a hot topic. But it'll pass soon. Old news. Despite your anxiety about, well, everything, everything pass by far too quickly.
It's 4 PM before you even realize it. Wait, why are you so worked up over this? It's just a stupid meeting. Nothing weird is going to happen. It's just a result of everything Mason said last night. And even if you have to practice being... being a couple, it's not like he's going to do anything
Right? You should bail. But as you pull up his messages and start typing out an excuse to remain hiding at home with your cat, you can practically envision Jude calling you "princess prude" again, and it's all the conviction you need to erase the stupid message, grab your bag, and stride as you confidently head for his apartment.
The confidence lasts for a whole twenty minutes, until you reach the lobby of the apartment building. You're not sure if it can even be classified as a lobby, it looks more like a resort. There's even a bar to the right.
You instantly feel out of place, suddenly hyper-aware of your admittedly plain looking clothing in contrast to the other walking around in designer brands. Not because you couldn't afford them but because it wouldn't fit you.
Shit, maybe you should've worn something your aunt gifted you... You catch a few people giving you sideways glances, some hostile, others curious. Probably recognizing who you were. Pulling out your phone, you retreat to a corner and quickly send a text to Jude.
From: You
4:25 PM I'm here please come down idk how this place works and the posh people are staring at me
From: Judyhoe
4:25 PM are you serious
You wait for a few more minutes, idly shuffling your feet as you try your best to stay out of everyone's direct line of sight.
Not just because you definitely look out of place, but also because the people living here probably know Jude. Which means they also probably know about Jude.
Which means they also probably know about you. And there seems to be very mixed reception to that. And then you spot him coming into the lobby, adorning a plain black tank top and matching black sweats. And for a second, you want to laugh, because he looks just as out of place as you do.
But he very obviously isn't, judging from the way that everyone greets him as he passes.
He offers nothing more than a nod of acknowledgement in response, even to the two glammed up girls that try to rest their hands on his arms in an attempt to stop him long enough for a brief conversation.
He just shrugs them off and keeps walking, narrowed eyes scanning the room in search of you. Stepping out of your little hiding place, you try to nonchalantly raise a hand to catch his attention, hoping that no one takes much notice of you.
Jude spots you, and his eyes narrow even more as he storms over to where you awkwardly stand.
"Why didn't you just come up?" He hisses, stopping right in front of you. People are staring. "I- What do you mean?" His voice drops an octave, and hushes to nearly a whisper. "Do you know how this looks? How much attention we're drawing to ourselves?
"Shit, I told Mason to tell everyone it was true, but I didn't want it to be a fucking spectacle."
Trying to keep your expression neutral, you respond through gritted teeth.
"I'm sorry that I don't know how to navigate your huge apartment lobby. There's so many stupid hallways and rooms down here, why does it all look so fucking fancy and expensive?"
"What?you're literally a fotballer you are loaded."
"Yeah, but not posh loaded, everything is in the bank you i do not show it off dickhead," you huff indignantly, eyes darting around nervously. Jude looks like he wants to say more, but it quickly comes to his attention that the two of you are on the verge of causing a scene.
There's quite a few people watching the two of you, some more obviously than others. The two girls that tried to hit on him are muttering something to themselves and "subtly" pointing at you, something the both of you are quick to notice.
You can't help but shrink in on yourself, feeling exposed and more than a bit humiliated. Why the fuck couldn't he just act normal and wait until you were in private to tell you this? Jude's eyes flicker from them, then back to you. Then, with a scowl, he grabs your hand - not your wrist this time and pulls you along behind him to the other end of the lobby where he first appeared from. You can't fight the blush that works its way onto your cheeks as his calloused palm envelops your own. Since when is hand-holding this embarrassing? You feel as if you're committing an act of public indecency.
Thankfully, your previous anger helps to combat the unwelcome feelings, and you silently fume as he pulls you into one of the several elevators lined up along either side of the hallway. Punching the button to one of the highest floors, he finally lets go of your hand, and you can't help but sigh out of relief.
There's an awkward moment of silence as the elevator begins to rise. You stare at the excessive amount of decor. It's a fucking elevator, why does it need a mini- chandelier?
"I... thought you'd come earlier." Jude breaks the silence first. "London traffic ," you muttered. More silence. The silence lasts for the rest of the elevator ride. The doors ding open with a merry chime. and Jude steps doors ding open with a merry chime, and Jude steps out, hesitating briefly to ensure that you're following before striding down the hallway.
You trail behind, marveling at how your shoes slightly sink into the plush carpeting. The whole place is impressive to look at, actually, and you get lost in the painted gold embellishments on the light blue wallpaper.
So lost, in fact, that you don't notice when Jude abruptly stops in front of a door, turning to face you. You look back just in time to face plant into his chest.
Letting out a startled yelp, you quickly jerk back and lose your balance, falling straight onto your ass. He just stares down at you, dumbfounded, as you rub at your nose with a wince. Why the fuck is his chest rock solid? You think to yourself, groaning.
"Look where you're fucking walking," Jude mutters with a glare, extending a hand for you to take. Prick. You bat it away, stubbornly standing on your own with only a tiny bit of struggle. He just rolls his eyes and turns to unlock the door, cursing as he fumbles with the key. It jingles a few times, and then the tell tale click of the lock gives way. When the door is open, you can't help but eagerly follow him inside, admittedly curious to see what a rich boy's apartment looks like. Does he have a master bathroom? TV's everywhere? Maybe some gold bars lying around? It's just a whole lot of nothing, much to your disappointment. He throws his keys on the kitchen counter as you take in your surroundings with a raised eyebrow.
The whole place is... minimalist, to say the least. Save for a few dumbbells lying around, a couch in the living area, and a clean and tidy kitchen, the rest of the space is bare. There's obviously appliances and a large flatscreen TV, but you'd really expected... more. Maybe some gold curtains, a regal throne even. Jude walks over to the living room and throws himself on the couch.
"Is your nose ok?" He asks, kicking his feet up on the ottoman in front of him with his arms folded behind his head.
You're not sure if it's the sudden privacy, the recent memory of colliding face first with his chest, or the fact that his pose just really... accentuates everything, but it's then that you really realize just how tight his tank top is, how clearly it defines every dip and curve of his muscles underneath and... no wonder you busted your nose.
Shut the fuck up shut the fuck up shut the fuck up
Forcing a nod, you swallow thickly.
"Uh- yeah." He grunts in response, then finally hunches over to rest his elbows on his knees - much to your relief - before sending an apathetic glance your way.
"So."
"So," you mimic uncertainly, finally taking a seat as far away from him as possible.
"The party is in six days," he says.
"And let me tell you, there's gonna be a lot more to it than just acting like you're obsessed with me and... vice versa or whatever. You're gonna be around more..."
He trails off, scrunching his eyebrows. "How did you put it? "posh" people, innit. So yeah, you're gonna need to learn how to act proper and, y'know, when to finally shut the fuck up."
He says that last sentence with a smirk, and you glower at him from your position on the couch.
"Are you serious? 'Act proper?' What, you think I'm some kind of barbarian?"
A wolfish grin stretches across his face. "You? A barbarian? Nah, you're too ditzy to be a barbarian."
Ditzy. Your father's eyes darken as he leers down at you, teeth grit together. You try not to cry, ignoring the way your eyes water as the broken plate trembles from within your grasp. "Fucking brain-dead," he slurs, breath reeking of alcohol. "That's what you are. You gonna grow up to be as ditzy as your mother? Huh?"
"Don't say that." You can feel anger rising, reddening your cheeks, but you do your best to remain calm. He shrugs, your serious tone going unnoticed.
"Ditzy. There, I said it. I mean, you probably don't know shit about the customs, so-"
You stand, still trying to maintain your composure but everything feels a bit fuzzy now.
"I said, don't call me that." And the fucker just laughs, glaring at you like he's challenging you.
"Why shouldn't I?"
"Because. I don't give a shit about the other nicknames, but that is something I don't want you calling me." Jude glowers at you for a few moments, before relenting with an eye roll.
"Fine. Jesus." And then he's blabbing off stuff about fancy customs, and you're finally starting to calm down, trying to tune in on what he's saying.
"My dad's kinda seen as the authority of the household, even though that's really my mom, but if you see him, you need to address him with respect."
You couldn't help but giggle a bit.
"Is that funny to you?"Jude's voice cuts through your thoughts, and when you turn to look at through your thoughts, and when you turn to look at him, he seems pretty pissed.
You just shrug, not really sure what to say. And Judd does not like that. "Hey, you might think all of this is a joke and that's fine, but my dad's cool. So just be respectful, asshole."
"I never said I wasn't going to be!"
"Then don't laugh when I tell you to be respectful!" You don't have a response to that, you'll admit. "Bitch," he mutters under his breath.
"Dick wad," you respond just as quietly.
"The fuck did you say?"
"Nothing, you stuck-up asshole." And the tension's back, thick in the air and hanging onto every spoken word. You stare each other down for what feels like an eternity, before you finally fold. This is all so exhausting.
"Ok, we can't do this anymore." He wrinkles his nose. "What?"
"This!" You gesture to him and then yourself. "We keep going for each other's throats and it's like, how are we supposed to pretend to be in love, when everything feels like a constant fight?"
"Not my fault."
"It's both of our faults!"
"You basically insulted my father," he growls. "You got pissy when I told you not to call me 'ditzy!' It was a simple request!" Jude groans, flopping back onto the couch to pinch his brow.
"Fine. What are you suggesting?"
Folding your hands together, you give him a stern look. "A truce."
He raises an eyebrow. "Which means...? Cause let's get one thing straight. I refuse to act like your little buddy buddy. We aren't friends." Sighing, you rub at your eyes.
"Ouch. That's not what I was aiming for, but thanks for the confirmation."
He just grunts, crossing his arms like a petulant child. "Ok, so then what?"
"No more fighting. No more trying to rile each other up every second of the damn day. That's what it means."
You stick out your hand.
"Just until the vacation is over. Alright? I'm not asking you to be friends." Jude looks at your outstretched hand suspiciously.
"So you're gonna actually listen to what I have to say about the party? The shit you're gonna have to learn?" You nod. "And you're gonna need to listen when I tell you not to call me something."
He thinks on it for only a second longer before grabbing your hand to shake it.
"Fine." And when the both of you let go, you almost want to celebrate because, score! Your fake-boyfriend maybe doesn't totally hate your guts anymore. Jude just scoffs, reaching into his pocket to fish out his phone.
Taglist: @valerysimps @like3dbypierregasly @enjoymyloves @capriaura @neymarssideboo @mad-die45
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hopelesslyromanticgay · 9 months
Text
An Americano, Please? Part 3
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Word count: 1.3K A/N: Just an FYI, I don't usually upload twice a day, I just felt particularly inspired today. As always, italics in quotation marks signify the speaking is using romanian dialect.
Y/N's POV:
I gotta admit. It hurt when Jenna didn't send me a text immediately. It's been two days, and still nothing.
Maybe it was a meaningless banter. Oh well. I guess I just really thought something could come out of it.
"What are you sulking about?" Nessa asks me one day after our shift. 
"I'm not sulking, I'm just a little sad because I didn't get a text from someone," I explain, "It's not like she owed me a text or anything, but I don't have to be ecstatic over the fact that she hasn't done so."
"Oh my god, you're into the American one," Nessa exclaims, "I knew it! I mean, she's gorgeous. Like if I were into girls I would definitely be into her." I take a sip of my cortado (half espresso, half milk) as I listen.
"Well in any case, she's probably not interested."
"Stop sulking, Y/N," Nessa scolds me, "Let's do something fun. Gotta get your mind off of this girl."
Since our shift just ended, and we have a whole afternoon ahead of us, Nessa and I take her car to Predeal, the closest thing to a modern city we have around here.
It's about seven miles, so about twenty minute drive. The town's mostly filled with ski resorts, but there's a few fun places to shop.
A great deal of the afternoon is spent sitting outside a store judging the tourists. 
"Oh my god she's probably saying something stupid like, 'I know it's winter but my husband will love this hawaiian T-shirt I bought in Romania,'" Nessa mimics the normal thought process of the typical tourist.
"This guy's even worse though,"  I stifle a laugh, mocking his actions.
After a thorough mockery of all of the Predeal tourists, we head back to our town, content with our afternoon.
I still haven't stopped thinking about Jenna, though. I wish I could have gotten to know her better. It's so nice to finally have someone I can talk to in English.
All I can do is hope that she comes back to the shop. Even then though, she probably won't want much to do with me.
Nessa drops me off at my apartment, waving goodbye. Almost instantly, I shed my winter coat, relieved by the warmth of the building.
The first thing I do is turn on the TV and open Netflix. A new baking show just dropped, and I'm not the type to turn down new entertainment.
The show turns out to be a combination of baking and engineering. It seems cool, but it's hard to tell from the first episode.
My phone lights up with a bright reminder Remember to feed Cupid!
Sighing, I get up from the couch and grab my fish flakes.
Cupid is my purple betta fish. She's about a year old and as of yet hasn't had too many health issues, which is super lucky for both of us. She's at the point where she recognizes my face. So when I go up to the tank, fish feed in hand, she eagerly swims up to the glass.
"Hey Cupid," I laugh, sprinkling some food into the tank.
After feeding her, I head back to the couch, where I continue watching my cooking show. Before I know it, I'm five episodes in and the sun is starting to set. I look out of the window, trying to gauge the temperature and weather condition.
It's a fairly clear twilight right now. There's a good chance I'll get to see stars tonight. Actually, I've decided I will see stars tonight.
I don my winter coat and make my way down the apartment complex stairs. One of the perks of not living in a huge city is that I can see the night sky beautifully.
One of my favorite places in town is on the outer edges of it. At this point, all of the buildings are housing, be it apartments or actual houses. The long stretches of pavement are perfect for strolling down while admiring the night. 
Not a lot of people choose to come out here late at night, which is honestly their loss. I wouldn't necessarily say I'm super into nature and the great outdoors, but when I am outside, I can find an appreciation for my surroundings.
So that's how I found myself strolling the streets of Bușteni Romania, not looking at the cement in front of me.
BAM! I find myself crashing into another person, almost knocking both of us over.
"Fuck, I am so sorry," I find myself defaulting to english, "I- I mean, I'm so sorry, are you okay?"
"Y/N?" A familiar voice asks.
"Jenna?" It may be dark, but I can just barely see the details of her face. God I hope she's not mad.
"Yep, it's me," I hear her faintly laugh.
"Are you okay? I almost knocked you over."
"I'm okay, just a little rattled."
"Sorry for that again," I apologize, "I should have been watching where I was going." 
"You could make it up to me by walking me to my apartment?" she offers.
"I'd like nothing more," I laugh, linking my arm with hers and we start to walk.
"So, Y/N, tell me about yourself," she starts the conversation.
"Well, my name's Y/N L/N, I work at a coffee shop. I speak English and Romanian, which is useful for when people like you come to the shop."
"I know that stuff," she interrupts me, "what do you like to do outside of work?"
"You know, the normal things, be around the people I care about, watch shows, I read sometimes, listen to music, that kind of stuff. What about you?"
"Well for starters, I'm Jenna Ortega, I also love to read and listen to music," she tells me, "I also like to write though, I have like, twenty scripts and stories sitting in my FinalDraft™ folder."
"Damn, you must really like writing," I respond, "that's pretty awesome."
"I guess so," she shrugs.
"Have you ever considered publishing your work?" I ask.
"Yeah, I actually published a book called It's All Love," she answers proudly.
"That's like, the coolest thing anyone's said to me all day," I tell her.
"I guess I'm just a cool person," she jokes, "I'm kidding, I'm kidding, only an arrogant person would say that."
"No, you have reason to say, it. You're a published author, the lead in a TV show, and fun to talk to. Don't discredit your own awesome-ness." 
She laughs, "thanks for saying that."
"Sure thing." 
"So, does your offer to take me around town sometime still stand?" she changes the subject.
"I'm a woman of my word, Jenna, if you still want a tour, you have my number," I remind her, trying to sound kind and cool at the same time. Which is kind of challenging.
"Oh my god, I forgot to text you, didn't I," she gasps, "I'm so so sorry, Y/N. I've just had so much going on." She starts to talk herself into a panic, "I have work for like, eight hours a day, plus cello lessons, plus german and fencing, it's just so much." If I had known how busy she was I never would have felt so hurt. That must be so overwhelming.
"Hey, it's okay, I'm not mad about it." Which is true. 
"That's such a relief," she exhales, "again, I'm so sorry."
"Hey, Jenna, it's okay. How about the next time you have a day off, we get in touch and I take you around town."
"Well, conveniently enough, my next day off is tomorrow, so how about I see you then?" she offers.
"I wouldn't be opposed to that," I smile, doing my best to hide how excited I am for this.
"Well this is my place," she announces, "thank you for walking me home." 
"Anytime," I reply, sad to know the night is ending. She heads through the door to her apartment, leaving me to walk the short five minutes to my apartment alone.
As soon as I get home, I dash to my bedroom, putting on pyjamas and getting ready for bed. I'm tired from the day. At at the same time, I'm so happy I got to see Jenna. I'm so excited that she wants to see me again, maybe tomorrow! I can't wait to get to know her better.
My phone lights up with a text from a new number
                       +1 ***-***-****
Does 11 AM tomorrow work for you?
-Jenna
I smile, quickly texting back 
                               Sure thing, see ya then :)
I can hardly wait.
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fuzybby · 3 months
Text
Punishment
Gale x F!Reader
Synopsis: You haven't been doing the best in your classes, and Mr. Dekarios needs a better way to punish you.
CW: spanking, fingering(?), no penetrative sex, Gale is a Professor, student and teacher relationship! (not healthy in real life but this is fiction)
1.4k words, enjoy!
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The sun peaking through the window is what woke me up from slumber. The bright rays felt warm against my face, and I instinctively tried to swat them away.
Fuck.
Another day of class. Not that the class is horrible, it's actually quite thrilling learning of the adventures from my Professor, the problem is how hot my Professor is.
Professor Dekarios. The man that he is. He keeps his hair in a half bun everyday. His beard is scruffy and I wonder what it would feel like against my neck, my chest, in between my thighs..
I can feel the wetness between my legs already. Another day where I go to class soaking wet for my teacher. The teacher.
If my friends had known I had the hots for him, they'd never let me live it down. Or, they'd agree to also wanting to fuck him, but I doubt that's the case. Many people don't actually enjoy Professor Dekarios's class, they say he rambles too much. The study of Arcana can be difficult at times, especially when the teacher is watching your every move with his sultry brown eyes..
Stop thinking!
I groan and finally get out of bed, rubbing the bridge of my nose with my pointer finger and thumb as I try to calm myself down. There's no need to work myself up before every class thinking of him.
I dress and eat, going about my morning routine as if I'm not insanely horny, before finally grabbing my books and making my way to The Study of Magic building on campus.
I find my regular seat, not right in front but not right in the middle of the rows. The closer to the front, the closer I am to the writing on the chalkboard so I can take notes. That part is real, I need to get better at focusing for class, because as of right now, my assignments I have been handing in are only getting average marks in return.
Class ticks on and on, and I study my Professor's movements methodically. His teaching robes are dark with stripes of red going down on his shoulders. They reach the floor, which leaves absolutely nothing to the imagination. He wore his glasses today, round lenses that don't sit on his nose well, making him constantly have to push the glasses up higher on his face. His hair is messy, small grey streaks sneak into his brown locks. He is so handsome.
At the end of class, when all is dismissed, I haven't taken any notes. All I've done is watch Professor Dekarios's hands as he swung them around, his lips as he spoke, his eyes as he went through the emotions of telling his story.
Everyone in the class packs up their books in their bags, chatting freely as they leave their seats to leave. I'm slower packing up, waiting for people to leave the row first before I start shoving my books into my own bag.
I look up to find Professor Dekarios's gaze on me, I can't tell the emotion in his eyes. He makes a ‘come here' motion with his finger, to which my heart rate spikes. Am I in trouble? I think to myself.
I finish packing quickly and make my way over to him and his desk, every other classmate now out of the room.
“We need to talk.” He says with a sigh, leaning against the front of his desk and crossing his arms.
“I have threatened suspension, called your parents, I have given you so much time and leeway for you to finish assignments, and yet you refuse to get your act together.” He continues, taking off his glasses and setting them down on his desk.
“I'm sorry, I-” I try to say, trying to come up with some sort of excuse that isn't ‘all I think about is you. you're the cause of my bad grades.’
“I am running out of appropriate punishments. At this point, I'll need to spank you like a child to get my point across.” He spits out. His face has contorted to anger.
I open my mouth to speak and nothing comes out, I'm at a loss for words. Spanking? Does he mean that? My face feels hot, and I try to forget the constant throbbing that comes from my clit.
“Maybe you should then.” Is what I say. I meet his eyes to convey my seriousness. “Spank me, I mean.”
He raises an eyebrow, his jaw clenched as he looks at me.
“Fine. Set your bag down, and bend over the desk.”
I stand frozen for a minute, realising that this is happening. He moves slightly to give me more room on the desk, his anger still evident.
I slowly set my bag down on the floor and stepped up to the desk, leaning over it slightly. Placing my hands to lay flat against the mahogany. I hear my Professor before I feel him, he stands behind me and quickly lands a sharp slap to my behind. I gasp and lean forwards more, my elbows now against the table.
The sting from his hand hit me hard, even though my clothes were still on, the roughness of his hands were evident.
“Mr. Dekarios!-” I gasp out, to which he replies “Call me Gale.”
“Gale” I breathe his name. It feels good against my tongue, comfortable.
He hits me again, on the other cheek this time. I crumble forwards again, my chest hitting the desk now as I'm fully bent over. My nails claw against the wood, and my breathing becomes ragged.
“Have you learnt your lesson yet?” Gale asks me, his hand comes to lay on my ass gently, hoping to bring some sort of comfort to the situation. He presses his crotch against me, and I can feel how hard he is. I whine out a quiet “yes” as I try to push myself against him.
The friction, for even just half a second, feels so good it makes me want to cry. I've wanted this for so long, I could probably cum from just the friction.
His hand on my ass moves to cup my cunt, bringing a whimper out of me. “Please” I beg, trying to move my hips against his hand.
“Can I take these off?” He asks, his other hand moving to snap the waistband of my trousers against my skin. I nod quickly, spewing more “please”s.
Gale takes them off quickly, only pushing them down to wrap around my ankles, his fingers coming back up to my uncovered folds. spreading them open with his thumbs, my slick already coating his digits.
“How long have you been wet for?” He breathes.
“All day.”
He groans. A gutteral sound that sends shivers down my spine as his fingers move again, this time to prod at my clit. Flicking it back and forth agonisingly slowly. His other hand moves to press against my lower back, keeping me grounded against the table.
A very gentle slap is sent to my cunt, the sound of flesh slapping against wetness filled the air for only a second. I whine again, biting my lip to stop the tears that threaten to spill. I have wanted him to touch me for so long, and how here he is, teasing me as I wriggle in his grasp.
He moves back to flick my clit again, this time harder and faster. Every once in a while circling it. My hips back on their own trying to get more pleasure, more friction from him.
It doesn't take long for me to scream out that I'm cumming. My body feels on fire as ecstasy courses through my veins. My legs shake from the pleasure as Gale tuts at me. My mouth opens in a silent scream as I try to control my emotions, tears have spilled from my eyes and landed onto the desk. Remnants of the filthy things we have done.
Gale removes his hand and pulls my pants back up, tapping my ass again gently.
I turn around on wobbly legs and try to move his robes up to get to him, but he grabs my wrists and stops me in my tracks. He smirks devilishly, his next words make my legs threaten to collapse even more than before.
“Only good girls who pay attention in class get my cock.”
Before long he's sending me on my way, not even a kiss on the lips goodbye. By the time I make it back to my dorm room I'm collapsing on the bed with a squeal. I will definitely be paying better attention now.
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Text
Clandestine. Part Two.
The affair was always a ticking time bomb. No one could have predicted how big the explosion would be.
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Part One. Part Three.
Pairing - Stewy Hosseini x Female Roy Reader
Age Rating - 18+
Warnings - cursing. so much angst. sorry not sorry <3
Word Count - 1.7k
Author's Note - thank you thank you thank you for all of the love on clandestine!! it makes me so happy that so many people love reading stewy fics, because there is a criminal lack of them on here. i am more than happy to provide <3 as always, feedback and reblogs are massively appreciated !!
Series Masterlist.
Masterlist. Requests.
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Knock. Knock. Knock.
Your eyes blink open, sunlight streaming through the sheer curtains. You’re resting comfortably on Stewy’s chest, both of his strong arms wrapped around you. You yawn sleepily, wondering what’s awoken you.
Knock. Knock. Knock.
Oh. That. You check the clock on the nightstand, realising that it’s only 7am. On a Saturday. Who’s knocking on the door at 7am on a Saturday morning?
Knock. Knock. Knock.
Fuck, is the noise getting louder? You nudge Stewy carefully, waking him.
“There’s someone banging on your door,” you whisper.
He groans and untangles his legs from yours. He throws on a pair of boxers, and moves to investigate the source of the knocking. You listen intently, curious to know who’s trying to gain Stewy’s attention so determinedly.
The door swings open.
“Ken?” Stewy questions, and you can almost hear the fear in his voice.
“Hey, man. Where the fuck is my sister?”
✵  ✵    ·  ✵    *  · ✵
You're half awake and disorientated. Stewy got up to find out who was at the door 10 minutes ago, and frankly, you're getting worried. Against your better judgement, you throw on his shirt from the night before and make your way out of the bedroom.
You enter the living room to be met face to face with Kendall. Shit.
You briefly wonder if you can play it off, fabricate a story, tell him it's not what it looks like!
Apart from, it's exactly what it looks like.
Someone from Kendall's team saw you and Stewy leave the gala together. And now you're here, in his living room, wearing nothing but his shirt. And your shoes are by the front door. And there's a wine glass with your lipstick print on it abandoned on the counter.
There's no getting out of this one.
Stewy wants to scream, yell at you to go back to his room. He wants to pick you up and throw you out of sight, praying Kendall hasn't noticed all the tell tale signs. But it's too late. He has.
"Okay. Uh - what the fuck is going on?"
Kendall asks the question while looking between the two of you like some sort of cartoon character doing a double take. It doesn't require a genius to figure it out, but Kendall needs to hear one of you say it out loud.
"Listen, Ken-"
"Ken, don't get mad-"
You both speak at the same time, verbally tripping over each other. You've never actually discussed what you'd do or say if you got found out. You both just always naively assumed it wouldn't happen.
You sit down on the edge of the couch, and look at your brother earnestly.
"Ken, I'm not going to sit here and lie to you. It isn't fair. But you can't get mad when I tell you the truth."
"I'll be the judge of that," he mutters sassily. You decide the backtalk is a result of his confusion, and give him a pass.
"Will you come and sit with me, please? The standing is making me nervous. I feel like I'm on trial."
"You might be. I haven't decided yet."
You can't tell if he's joking. He's certainly not smiling.
Kendall moves to sit down next you. Stewy follows, perching himself on the opposite end to give you space. Close enough if you need him, far enough that it won't upset your brother more.
"Start talking," he commands, still confused.
"It's... well I - we - me and Stewy, we're -"
"Together," Stewy finishes for you. Kendall glares at him, and he decides he'll keep his mouth shut for a while.
"Yeah, we're together," you continue. "We have been for over a year. It isn't just sex, or anything. I'm in love with him."
It's weird to finally bear this truth after keeping it a secret for so long. It feels wrong, but also refreshing - like a bitter lemon on a hot day.
Kendall is scarily silent.
"You're... kidding, right?" he asks, finally breaking through the quiet.
"Do I look like I'm kidding?" you question, anger bubbling up. "It's my life, Kendall. It actually doesn't matter who I date. It doesn't change anything. It doesn't make a difference."
He looks at you incredulously.
"You're so fuckin' naive. How can you sit here and tell me this doesn't change anything?"
You go to speak, but he continues.
"You lied to me, first off. Both of you. For God knows how long-"
"Kendall-"
"Let me fucking finish."
You shrink back into the couch, willing it to swallow you.
"You both lied to me. You broke my trust... and uh, that fucking hurts, actually. And then there's the business side of things. You work for Waystar. Stewy is a board member. That's a conflict of interest."
You scoff at him, but then realise he's deadly serious.
"... A conflict of interest?"
"It's against company policy. How am I going to trust you? How is anyone? Information might get leaked. What if I tell you something, and then you tell Stewy? And he tells Sandy and Sandi, and then the Pierces, and all of a sudden nothing is private anymore. I. Can't. Trust. You."
Tears are welling up in your eyes quicker than you can control. You're trying to take deep breaths, begging yourself not to cry in front of Kendall.
"You're breaking my fucking heart, Ken," you whisper.
"Yeah? Well I walked in here this morning, and you broke mine first."
A choked sob escapes you, and the floodgates open. Fresh, hot tears sprint down your cheeks, landing in your lap. Stewy can't stand to sit and watch any longer.
"Okay, man, that's enough. This isn't fair."
"What's not fair is the two people I trust the most both lying to my face for a year. That's what isn't fucking fair."
With that, Kendall stands up and strides towards the front door, slamming it behind him as he leaves. The minute he's gone, Stewy is wrapping his arms around you, pulling you into his chest.
"It's okay, baby," he murmurs, stroking your hair. "He'll come around. We'll be okay. If we stick together, we'll be okay."
His reassurances are only making you cry harder, sobs escaping you uncontrollably. You eventually exhaust yourself, falling into a restless sleep in Stewy's arms on the couch.
✵  ✵    ·  ✵    *  · ✵
You wake up in bed. You've temporarily forgotten the events of the morning, before it all comes crashing back down around you suddenly. Distantly, you can hear Stewy in the kitchen, talking on the phone. You look around the room, and know what you have to do.
You leave the bedroom with a bag in hand, throwing it onto the ground as you grab your shoes. Stewy clocks you, and hangs up the phone.
"Can I call you back? Thanks, man. I'll see you tomorrow."
He runs over to where you're slipping your heels on, precariously balanced against the side of the couch.
"Honey, where are you going?" he questions, panic washing over him at your frantic state. "Wait, have you packed a bag?"
He's trying to catch your eyes, but you keep looking away, desperate to avoid his unrelenting gaze.
"I'm going home."
A pause.
"... This is your home."
You knew he'd say that. It hurts just the same.
"No, Stewy, this is your home. My apartment is across town."
"You haven't been there in months. All your stuff is here. Baby, talk to me. What's going on? Did Kendall get in your head?"
"Kendall's right!" you shout, trying to pick up your bag. Stewy gets there first and grabs it, flinging it behind him, out of your reach.
"About what? He's just in shock, baby! He's confused and he feels betrayed. You don't owe him fuckin' anything. Not after everything that family has put you through."
"They're still my family. I can't lose my entire family, Stewy!"
"What kind of fucking family stab each other in the back? Lie to each other? Sell each other out for business? You're better off without them and you know it."
You know he's right. You're trying to convince yourself he isn't.
"You heard what he said! He won't trust me anymore. No one will. It's shitty, but my job is important to me. I can't be known as the Roy liability."
"Trust me, honey, you're the least likely to be named the Roy liability."
"That's not the point! You're not listening to me. I'm the youngest, I've had to fight for respect every fucking day of my life. I'm finally where I deserve to be. I can't throw it all away for... for love!"
Stewy flinches like you've punched him in the gut. He takes a step back and leans against the kitchen island, trying to keep his balance.
"What happened to 'you and me against the world', huh?" he murmurs.
"I think I got too wrapped up in this - in us. I was stupid to think it could work. We both were."
"I wasn't," he replies defiantly. "I knew exactly what I was getting into. I knew it would be really fucking difficult and I loved you anyway."
Stewy swears his hard breaks so hard, the both of you hear it shatter. A silent tear rolls down his cheek, big brown eyes filled with sadness.
"I'm not sorry for loving you," you whisper. "I'm sorry for a lot of things, but never for loving you."
"If you meant that, you wouldn't be giving up."
You duck your head, unable to look at him any longer.
"This isn't giving up. This is... quitting while we're ahead. If we keep going, we'll just end up having a huge, horrible, public breakup," you stop, and take a deep breath. "I think we were always doomed to fail."
Stewy thinks about the diamond ring that sits in a box in the top drawer of his nightstand. Doomed to fail.
You finally look up at him, and all the air leaves your lungs. You've never seen him look so defeated, so vulnerable. You're the cause of this. And you hate yourself for it.
You pad across the kitchen and pick up your bag from where he threw it, before stopping in front of him.
"I don't regret you, Stewy Hosseini. I never will."
With that, you stride out of the front door, closing it gently behind you. Stewy is left, cold and empty, in the apartment that no longer feels like home.
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so... part 3??
Stewy Tag List -
@shawty-writes-a-little
@616wilsons
@justacaliforniandreamer
@isuspectitwasthenargles
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gyll-yee-haw · 2 months
Note
Your age gap writings are so good! Can you write something where the reader is in her 20s in college and Jake protects her from hate from fans or maybe one of his friends is like 'She's way too young for you and she isnt famous or trying to be famous so why are you with her???' and Jake just shuts them down
Thank you so much, babyy <3
I've got a taste for men who are older, can't help it.... 😔
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Warnings: age gap, misogyny (not from Jake obv), cockwarming, pool sex, size kink, oral (f), creampie, soft!dom Jake, daddy kink, so many pet names, a hint of innocence kink
Like 3.2k words
---
It was a hot summer day. You were outside by the pool, book open in front of you as the sun burned your skin. You were finally relaxing after an exhausting semester in college.
Poor Jake, though, couldn't join you. He had a lot of things to solve about upcoming projects... you weren't complaining, you were extremely proud. And why would you even complain? Most days he worked from home. He sat with his laptop at the kitchen table, which was separated from the pool area by a glass door, that allowed him to enjoy the view of you in a bikini, living your best life. Well, you earned it, college can be really rough.
More often than not, you would tease him. Like when he was taking an important call and your bikini top would accidentally fall off... or when you (also accidentally) made eye contact with him while enjoying your popsicle a little too much... and all that would lead to him delaying his work just a little bit.
But tomorrow would be different. A few people on his team would come over for a meeting. So you told him you would just hide in the bedroom until they were finished. He insisted that the meeting shouldn't stop you from enjoying your time however you liked, but you said you preferred it that way. Not only you wouldn't feel comfortable having foreigner eyes on you, but you also didn't want to embarrass Jake... you knew by the comments you've been reading the kind of things people called you. You didn't want to give anyone any evidence that you were irresponsible or bad for his career.
-
So, by the time everyone arrived the next day, you were comfortably snuggling on your pillows, searching for something to watch on tv. Or some background noise for you to nap to.
Meanwhile, Jake was downstairs, discussing important things with his crew.
The meeting itself didn't take too long. But as everyone was saying goodbye, one of his oldest friends, who worked on his image's management asked him if it was okay for him to stay a little longer, so they could speak privately. Jake didn't mind and didn't think much of it... after all, they knew each other for a very long time, and would often talk about non-work related things.
"Hey, man." Jake greeted him as soon as the last person walked out. "Sit down, want something to drink?"
"No, I'm okay, I won't take too long, actually." The man replied in a very serious tone. "There's just something that a few of us been talking about and... we really didn't want to bring it up during the meeting, because it's quite delicate."
Jake's face fell. He had been so happy these last days... and the meeting was so successful, he didn't expect to have any trouble soon.
"Actually..." The man continued, as there was no response from Jake. "No one really wanted to bring it up, but... I'm your friend, am I not? I knew I had to."
"What's going on?" Jake asked, trying to get him to go straight to point, instead of explaining himself over and over again.
"It's about Y/N." He said at once. "Listen, man... I know you, I know you're in love and you're happy, but..."
"Hey, don't start." Jake felt his blood boil as he brought your name up. "I know what people say about her. But they don't know her. And neither do you."
"Jake, man..." he shook his head, hands on his waist as he tried get into Jake's head. "Come on, we all know how much shit starts with you don't know her, she's different..."
"Well, and you know that people on the internet are just waiting for opportunity to misinterpret something... at least you should know, since it's your job." Jake shrugged. "I mean... how many times did we have to deal with this?"
"Jake, I'm not talking as someone worried about your career. I know that these comments will die when they find someone else to cancel." He explained. "I'm talking as someone who's worried about you. You know how these girls are... maybe she finds a richer guy before the comments die, you know."
"Get out of my house." Jake closed his eyes and counted to ten, trying to keep his voice low.
"Come on, man..."
"Get the fuck out." He repeated. "If you leave right now, you're just fired. If I have to ask again, I'll make a few phone calls just to make sure you won't be getting another job anytime soon."
"You know what?" The man raised both hands in the air and chuckled. "You do whatever you want, I'm just trying to warn you..."
The look on Jake's face made him walk through the door without saying anything else.
Jake's body felt heavy and he allowed it to fall on the sofa. His heart ached. How could anyone talk about his princess that way? People didn't know how sweet and caring and kind you were. People didn't know how happy you made him.
"Fuck it." He rolled his eyes.
He was stressed and decided to take the rest of the day off. Take the day off to enjoy your company. You relaxed him like nothing else and nobody knew shit about you.
The eager manner he opened the bedroom door made you jump.
"Sorry, baby." He spoke as he climbed up the bed, resting his head on your chest. He left out a frustrated sigh.
"Oh no, what happened?" Your arms automatically wrapped around him. He looked exhausted.
"Just had to fucking fire someone." He replied, feeling his skin crawl. It made him even more angry to remember that asshole's words now, while he was being comforted by you. "Sexist piece of shit."
"Why?" Your eyes widened. He told you it would be a simple meeting... you would never expect things to end this way.
"I don't really wanna talk about it right now." He knew that if he told you, it would ruin your day. It would hurt your feelings, you would get insecure and maybe even feel a little guilty, which you absolutely didn't deserve. "But you could make me feel better, pretty princess."
Your face visibly lit up at the possibility. And that sparkle on your eyes made Jake regret not punching that guy on the face.
"Why don't you put your bikini on, darling?" He suggested. "Wanna spend the rest of the day by the pool with you, how does that sound?"
"Really?" You smiled at him, warming up his heart. "Just you and me, no work?"
"No work." He promised, returning your smile. "Hurry up, angel. I'll be downstairs waiting for you."
You didn't waste any time. You ran to the bathroom to put on your cutest bikini. One Jake himself bought you. You loved it when looking pretty for him could solve his problems. You felt so powerful.
When you were ready, you wrapped a towel around your body and went downstairs. From the kitchen, you could see him inside the pool. His hair was wet and the way he was breathing indicated he had swam a few laps already. You bit your lip. The roles were reversed at that moment. Now you were the one who was appreciating how the sun hit his wet skin so beautifully. His breathtaking body. God, no man your age looked like that.
But his beauty wasn't all that caught your eye. He also looked so stressed. And he tried to hide it as soon as he noticed you approaching the pool.
You tossed your towel on a chair and sat on the edge of the pool, feeling the water cover the lower half of your legs. He swan closer to you and placed his hands on your knees, which you took as sign to spread your legs. As soon as you did, he stood between them and cupped your cheeks with both hands, placing a sweet kiss on your nose.
You shivered as drops of cold water rolled down his fingers through your neck.
"I love you." He said, out of nowhere. "You make me so fucking happy."
"I love you too." You smiled, placing your hands on top of his, still on your face.
His hands went to your waist and he caught how your body reacted, letting out a laugh.
"What? Water is so cold..." you felt relieved by seeing him laugh.
"It kinda is." He admitted, and you knew that look in his eyes. He had an idea. "Why don't you come here and keep me warm, huh?"
"Alright, but give me a minute." You took a deep breath.
"Take your time, baby, I'm yours all day today." He leaned down, spreading your legs a bit more so he could place little kisses on the inside of your thighs, dangerously close to what your bikinis barely covered. "In fact, I'm yours all the time. Everyday. Even when I'm not here, you're all I think about."
"Yeah?" You bit your lip, bringing your hand to the back of his head, grabbing his hair very gently.
"I do." He continued his trail of kisses as he wanted to make sure not an inch of your thighs wouldn't feel loved. "If I could have my mouth on you all day I would, princess. For the rest of my life..."
He grabbed your thighs, making you move foward a bit. Then he used two fingers to pull your bikini panties to the side before getting his tongue on you. He licked your folds up and down slowly, like he was trying to discover what you tasted like. Like he didn't have you for breakfast that very morning. And the way his tongue began to work afterwards, hungrily, in and out of your hole, indicated he liked it very much.
He used his other hand to finger you, one finger in and out slowly, until he felt he could accommodate two, and as your moans got louder, he began curling them inside of you, all while he licked and sucked on your clit with passion.
Your hips bucked against his face and you pulled his hair, trying not to fall inside the pool, since you were dangerously close to the edge.
"Jake!" you gasped loudly. "Gonna cum, gonna cum..."
His mouth was working too hard on your clit and no force in the universe could make him stop at that moment, so he wasn't really able to reply, but you took that as a sign that he really wanted you to. And you did. You screamed his name, pulling his hair hard enough to make him moan against your core. When you were finished, you had to push him away, cause he didn't want to stop.
"Please... it hurts, too sensitive..." you begged.
He separated his mouth from you, wearing an unbearably gorgeous grin. Then he removed his fingers, immediately sucking them clean.
"Taste so fucking good, baby, can't help it, want more..."
"Fuck, Jake, I..."
"It's okay, princess. Won't you join me?" He helped you fix your bikini as if nothing had happened.
"I will, turn around."
He immediately understood what you meant. He turned his back to you and you hopped on it like a koala, gasping as you felt the water involving your whole body, arms and legs wrapping tighter around Jake's body.
"Easy, baby, you'll get used to it." He chuckled, moving around the pool with you in his back.
He was right, soon enough you felt your body relax against his.
"See, I'm keeping you warm." You said, kissing his shoulder.
"Oh, sweet girl..." he laughed. "That's not what I meant."
Your eyes widened at the realization. "Oh... I'm sorry, I'm so stupid."
"You're not stupid. You're my sweet, innocent little girl, aren't you?" He comforted you.
"I guess..." you felt your face grow warmer.
You untangled yourself from him, feet touching the floor. He turned around to face you.
"You're so pretty." He murmured, touching your face softly.
"Wanted to look pretty for you." You smirked. "Make you forget all your worries."
"You did it." His hand wrapped softly around your neck. "You're such a good girl for it."
"Hmm..." you started feeling him through his swimming shorts. "You're so hard."
"Yes, pretty girl. You did this." He brought his lips to yours, brushing softly as you reached inside his shorts.
His hands went to your hips and he kissed you to distract you from the fact he was getting rid of your bikini panties, then threw them somewhere outside the pool, keeping an eye contact that was enough to make you clench around nothing. He pulled his shorts down just enough to free his cock.
"Ready, baby?" He asked sweetly and you nodded. "Don't move, okay? Stay very still and relax."
You wrapped your legs around him and he entered you slowly. When he was all the way in, he stopped everything, just held you tightly.
"Just wanna relax with my pretty girl today." He said, giving your forehead a kiss. "Cock buried deep inside her, where it belongs."
It was the way he spoke the dirtiest things in the sweetest tone that always drove you crazy. That made you wanna bounce on his cock like no tomorrow. That made you moan under your breath, but he always, always heard you.
"What's wrong, princess?" He mocked.
"You're so fucking hot..." you almost cried as you watched him lift your bikini top and pinch your nipples.
"So cockdrunk and I didn't even fuck you properly." He kept playing with your tits.
"Please..." you whined.
"Y/N, it hasn't been 5 minutes." He kissed your neck. "Be patient, I thought you were a good girl... I just need a break, can't you see that?"
"I'm sorry." You moaned. "But... but you can take a break, and maybe I could move, just me?"
"Come on, you can do better than that." He laughed at how incoherent you sounded. "I know you know how to beg, baby. Just say the words, you have to be more clear."
He pinched your nipples again as he saw you hesitate.
"Jake, fuck!" You moaned in pain, feeling your pussy squeeze him. "Let me sit on your cock, PLEASE. I will be good, I promise..."
"That's better." He removed himself from you, earning protests. "Calm down, baby, I'm gonna do what you asked, unless you wanna be a brat..."
You bit your lip, to keep quiet.
He fixed his shorts and got out of the pool, signaling with his hand for you to follow him, and you did, like an obedient puppy obsessed with it's owner.
He sat on a chair, beside the pool, legs spread, waiting for you. You had to take a moment to appreciate his body again. His hairy chest, with a matching beard. He was so big... his thighs, his posture so masculine. The way he looked so intimidating, but was the softest when it came to you... he was perfect.
Soon enough you were standing between his legs. He kept eye contact with you as he got rid of your bikini top, directing his mouth to your tits as he grabbed your ass with both hands, hard enough to leave a mark.
"You're so fucking gorgeous." His voice was filled with lust as he spoke. "Gonna be a good girl and sit on my cock now?"
"Yes, fucking love your cock..." you agreed, feeling dumb as you saw it throb when he pulled it out of his pants.
"You're such a dirty girl, saying things like that... I mean, I know you love my cock, but jesus..." he mocked you with a smirk, helping your straddle him.
"Don't like it when I talk dirty, daddy?" You asked innocently.
"Fucking love it, baby, can't you see my cock throbbing? Come on, angel, make daddy cum like you promised, be good to me..."
He didn't even finish his words before you managed to get it inside of you, moaning at how good he stretched you.
You started moving up and down at a nice pace, knowing both of you were just too horny for games. Knowing that you only had the illusion of being on control because you were on top... but he could make you regret the smallest teasing.
"Fuck..." he moaned both at your movements and the sight of your tits boucing.
One of his hands cupped one of your breasts as the other one went to your hip, a sign that he wanted it harder. And you gave it to him harder.
"You're so good to me, such a pretty baby... you're gonna make me cum."
"Need you to!" You already looked and sounded like a mess, boucing on his cock as fast as you could, feeling your pussy start to squeeze him. "Need to you to cum inside, daddy..."
"Of course, baby, you deserve it, yeah?" Both his hands were now on your hips, handling you like a doll. "All of daddy's cum belongs to this pretty pussy..."
You cried out as you came again. So much harder. And he just kept thrusting hard, his thighs hitting your ass made a sound so loud you could barely hear him.
And then he came too, as deep as he could. He rested on the chair, breathing heavily and you collapsed on his chest. A few minutes of the most absolutely perfect peace he felt in days filled the air, and he breathed it in.
Not even your whines and protests when he pulled out could interrupt it, he just chuckled.
"Shhh it's okay, little one." He said sweetly. "Just wanna take care of my princess."
You accepted, feeling safe as he wrapped a towel around your body and stood up with you still in his arms. He carried you bridal style to the bedroom.
"Waaait! No!" You laughed as he tried to put you down on the bed. "We're still wet!"
"That doesn't matter, we'll change the sheets afterwards, come on..." he rolled his eyes. "Just wanna look at you for a second."
"You've been looking at me a lot these days..." you mocked him. "Watching me through that glass door, I see you pretending to work..."
"It's just hard to believe you're mine." He admited, intertwining his fingers with yours. "I'm afraid you'll disappear if I look away."
"That's right, I'm yours... and I'm not going anywhere." You promised, placing a soft kiss on his lips. "I love you, Jake."
You had no idea how much he needed to hear that. Of course he knew it, but having moments like this, so intimate, even more than the sex they just had, gave him strength to face all the bullshit people said about you and him. Cause in the end, this is what he was coming home to. He felt safe.
"I love you so much, my princess."
128 notes · View notes
shhh-secret-time · 2 months
Note
HIII could you do Kyle x reader where it's a soulmate au?? plsss and thank uuu
Anon you were so patient with me! Thank you! And thank you for requesting my favorite boy! I'm so down bad for the sweet red head.
Warning: Strong Language, Tooth-Rotting Fluff
Pairings: Kyle x GN!Reader
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'Oh my god! I'm going to fucking kill him.'
The tips of your fingers traced the golden ink like sentence on your palm, watching as the cursive font danced across your skin. It happened every morning at eight on the dot, a new sentence would sketch itself into your skin. When it first happened, you thought maybe someone drew on you when you weren't paying attention, especially since the next day the words changed. But the font was beautiful and shimmered in the light, what pen could do something like that?
Later as the years went by you learned that apparently you had a soulmate, and these were their thoughts. Whoever they were scared you sometimes with the things they thought about, usually very violent thoughts. It made you wonder what type of person they were. I mean you were sure they wouldn't act on it; you've thought tons of things but that didn't mean you were a bad person. It almost made you wonder what your soulmate thought of your inner voice.
South Park was a small town, not many people chose to actually live in a town that was riddled with a backwater run down mentality. It was famous for all the wrong reasons, but that meant everyone kind of knew each other, or at the very least of each other. The kids you went to elementary with followed you to middle and you followed them to high school. Now here you were in community college sitting in the library with the few people you could call friends.
Bebe Steven's was the first person to call you a friend, so her friends became yours, adopting you into their little group. A close-knit group of people who cared about you, what more could you ask for?
"I can't do it anymore Wendy, please!" Speaking of the blonde, the poor girl was slumped over the table with her cheek pressed into the math textbook. Her bottom lip was poking out and if you didn't know her so well you would swear those crocodile tears were real.
"Bebe you barley passed the last test, and that's because you were copying off of Nicole!" Wendy sighed as she gave into the pitiful whine of her friend, reaching over to pat the top of her curls.
"I knoooow but can't we just have a little break? Pleaaaase! I need to spill some tea!" Bebe sprung up and you knew what was coming. Bebe had a secret weapon, the most powerful puppy eyes in South Park. Before Wendy could avert her eyes, she delivered the killing blow. "Please Wendy? Just ten minutes~ it's super hooooot tea~."
You smiled softly at the both of them, shooting Wendy a look of pity as you watched in real time her lose the internal battle. Wendy's shoulders slumped forward, and she finally smiled.
"Fine...ten minutes and then we're going back to work."
"Yes!" Bebe cheered as she threw her arms around Wendy, pulling her into a tight hug. "SO, guess who found their soulmate!"
You tensed up at the subject maybe without even realizing it, you pulled your sleeve over your palm and held it up to your mouth. You had a horrible habit of chewing on your bottom lip to keep yourself from protesting the conversation.
"Who?"
"Mercedes!"
"Like...waitress Mercedes?"
"Yeaaah! Ugh she's so lucky! I wanna find mine already! At least you're in the same boat I am." Pulling herself from Wendy, Bebe turned to look at you with a smile.
"Y... yeah. Wait Wendy is too, isn't she?" You muttered past your sleeve.
"No! Wendy already knows hers! She's just not doing anything about it!" Bebe sneered and crossed her arms under her chest, her lips pursed into a pout.
"But...why?"
"I just want to focus on me right now. School is important and I don't know, I've got time." Wendy replied with a shrug of her shoulders.
You stared at her in awe, there were times when you couldn't help but admire her. Wendy seemed like she had it all figured out, like she knew what she wanted from life and wasn't afraid to grab ahold of it.
Maybe you should take a page from her book, start doing things for you. The fear of your soulmate being some terrifying violent person shouldn't stop you from at least trying to find them.
It was as if the conversation was breathing life back into Bebe, she perked up and grinned at you. But when your eyes met hers all you could see was the mischief in them, if you didn't know better you'd swear it was excitement.
"Apparently the closer you get to your soulmate the words on your palm with change! You'll be able to tell what they're thinking in real time! Haaaave yours changed yet?" Bebe sung out, her hands reaching across the table to gentle take yours.
She flipped your hand over, so your palms were facing up, her beautiful done red nails seemed to contrast yours. She traced them across the font on your palm with a hum. "Or are you like Wendy and you're waiting? You've gotta know right?"
"N...no I don't. I've been-", you stopped and bit your bottom lip again, "... kind of afraid to find out who it is."
"What? Why?" Bebe took your hand and gave it a squeeze like she was trying to reassure you to keep going.
That's when you pulled your sleeve up the whole way so she could see the rest of the sentence. Their eyes widened and silence fell over the three of you. You kept your eyes on your lap as you let them read it so you missed Wendy's little head tilt. The words ringing in her ears like she could hear it. No, it couldn't be...could it?
"Well, they're just thoughts, right? It's not like whoever it is will actually do it! Come on hun you can't let that stop you! Just, like, pay extra close to your palm today! There might be something sweet on there if they're nearby!"
You furrowed your brows at that if they were nearby? Maybe it was a little harder to tell when everyone in the school wore gloves because of how cold it was, you included. After a few moments of debating between everything you nodded at her and decided you'd keep your gloves off today. With that Wendy's phone chimed letting your little group know that your ten minutes were up, and it was time to get back to studying, but now you were out of it. You couldn't focus on learning anything else but your palm, watching the font like if you blinked you'd miss it.
But nothing changed, the threat on your palm stayed for the rest of the study session. With a sigh you packed your things and got ready to leave the library, the girls hugging you tightly as they went their own way. Leaving into the halls of the school, passing past other students whose voices seemed to fade into the background. But despite your attempts to smother everyone else out, no one could really tune out South Park's famous boys. Stan and Kyle were standing by their lockers talking and for once it was Stan that seemed to be getting under Kyle's skin.
"Dude, this is the fourth time you've blown me off! Come on, we made these plans last week!"
"I know man, but the band needs me! We've got a gig coming up and we have to get more practice in! I'm sorry Kyle, I'll make it up to you!" Stan shot him an apologetic look.
Kyle sighed and simply rolled his eyes, "Sure dude, one of these days I'm going to cash in all of the times you said you'll make it up to me."
Stan let out a laugh and wrapped his arm around the taller man's neck bringing him down to his level. You smiled at the both of them, you didn't know Stan very well, but Kyle was always nice to you. You admired the fact that he always spoke his mind, whoever his soulmate was had to be the luckiest person on earth. Not only because of how sweet he was, but again he always spoke his mind, there was no guessing at what he was thinking. You peered down at your palm again and blinked in surprise, it had changed.
'He's lucky he's my best friend.'
Oh. Oh.
'Are they looking at me? Do I have something on my face?'
You could feel your heart rate pick up, eyes bouncing between your palm and Kyle. Your head was now on a swivel looking around as if the answers would emerge out of the many groups walking around. When Stan broke away from Kyle with his guitar on his back, the red head began putting his books away. There you stood, glued to this spot watching him with intense eyes. So, when he turned and saw your passionate gaze he couldn't help but flinch on the spot, but he couldn't tear his eyes from you.
Your palm changed again. You couldn't believe it. Just a minute ago you were telling your two best friends about how you were afraid to meet your soulmate and now here he was. This felt almost too cliche, like the universe was tired of you trying to run from it. And now here you were standing in the hall, a few steps away from someone who was supposed to be yours. Did he know? Probably not from how quiet you were and how you liked to keep to yourself. So now here you were with all that knowledge and nowhere to run.
'Their eyes are so pretty; I don't know why I've never noticed before.'
Was he trying to kill you? You felt the compliment go straight to your heart, making it speed up. Your face was turning red at his words, even if he didn't say them, you could almost hear them. You felt something in your chest tug you towards him, like your heart was leaping in his direction and demanding that you listen to it. Kyle watched as you made your way to where he was standing, moving through the halls like nothing else matters.
"Um...hey, is everything okay?" Kyle nervously looked down at you, he couldn't help wondering why his heart was racing so hard.
Sure, you were attractive, but that wasn't all you were. Sure, he really liked your laugh when he heard you talking with Bebe and Wendy, and he secretly wished he made you laugh like that. Sure, you had the most beautiful eyes he had ever seen, but he would never tell you that. How could he? What if you thought he was a freak and oh my god you're saying something and he's not paying attention.
"- so yeah, can you take your gloves off for me?"
"H-huh my gloves? Uh sure." Kyle shook himself out of his trance, he didn't know why you needed his gloves off but that was his fault for not paying attention.
As he removed his gloves you got a glance at his palm looking for any signs of words on his palm.
'I never realized how tall he is.' Those were your thoughts. Your thoughts were on his palm, and he doesn't even realize it yet.
"Did you need to borrow them? Are you cold?" He's asking you with such a soft voice, care laced in his tone.
"No no I just um okay this is going to sound really strange... b-but can you think of an animal for me?"
"An... animal? Like my favorite animal?"
"Sure. That works." You chuckled at the confusion on his face, brows furrowed together in deep thought which was exactly what you wanted.
'Fox.' That's cute.
"Your favorite animal is a fox?" You asked looking up from your palm with a smile.
"Huh but I... how did-" He stopped. The whole situation came crashing down onto him, his mouth opened to say something, but nothing would come out. So now he just looked like a fish gasping for air.
"Yeah I- wow this is it. I think you're my soul-mate Kyle." As you showed him your palm you almost had to laugh about how many times you've flashed it at people today.
Those deep forest green eyes of his watched the golden light on your palm swirl and change as his thoughts did. The tips of his ears turn red as he desperately tries to keep his thoughts under control, soulmate or not he didn't want to scare you off with stupid shit his brain comes up with.
"Is um...is your favorite animal on my palm too?" No. It wasn't.
'His eyes are like emeralds.'
"You think my eyes are like emeralds?"
"You think my smile is cute?" You shot back with a small smirk making him look away, covering his mouth with the back of his hand.
Kyle and you stood in silence for a few moments, hearts racing and nervous shifting from foot to foot. "So, um...my weekend is free do you wanna grab a coffee?"
"I'd love to get coffee with you Kyle~" You let out a laugh, your hand coming up to cover your smile, but it was stopped by his.
The warmth of his hand beating back the chill of yours, they were softer than you thought they'd be. His thumb nervously rubs against your knuckles enjoying the way your hand felt in his, so much smaller but it fit so perfectly. Kyle smiled brightly at your response, a wave of relief washing over him and a breath he didn't know he was holding. He took the first step towards the door with you in tow, a soft glow between the both of you. Something deep inside of you felt complete, like pieces of a puzzle or links of a chain.
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tatasoom · 2 months
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"I'm still turning the pages"
Promised proper analysis of what happened in ep 12 and what creators wanted to tell us. Many quotes and pics and very real stories included. Enjoy!
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The more I was thinking about the ending and how much disappointment and even hatred it brought, the more I was doubting the decision to make this analysis. However I believe there're people who open enough to look deeper, so you may like what the writers gave us.
It's three years after breaking up. Mhok and Day are hard-working people (as they used to be actually). Mhok is exploring his potential in cooking. Day is diving into his obsession with books.
There's a little hint for understanding how little these years mean for the brightest picture you'll never forget. It's Aon asking Day about writing his own book:
Should we get someone back here to assist you write?
Day's face has changed signaling that feelings are still there. Even after three years.
And then the meeting. And feelings from the perspective of Mhok.
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And when it's almost the saddest scene in the whole world we're back to romantic comedy with P'Aof's one second cameo and pranks from Mhok. It feels like Mhok is silent in this scene only to laugh at Day, but it's a scene where Day is given a moment to think about his own feelings. And to get a little verbal slap at the end.
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Then Mhok has a meeting with Phojai and Night. And if you look at their faces, you'll notice that nobody believes MhokDay story has ended. Some viewers have a question for Mhok acting like there hasn't been three years without the love of his life... Don't you think that all three years he has being told about Day by Phojai? I'm sure she did her best to be in contact!
And for Day blocking Mhok's number I have a personal experience reference. I unblocked my ex only when I was sure I feel nothing for him. I needed to be sure that whatever we'll say to each other my heart wouldn't feel the same way as when we were dating. It took around two or three years to learn this. Now do you understand Day better? After three years Mhok's number is still blocked.
So Mhok came to the Day's bookshop. They're playing this game second time. First it was Mhok's voice, and now it's Mhok's scent.
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Day almost did it. He almost saved his face neutral. The book he chose as an editor betrayed him.
"Many books encourage us to put the past behind us and move forward. But this book raises the question: if the past was so beautiful, can we simply hold onto that beauty?"
Was their story beautiful enough to begin again with the same person?
Then they're again in the house they used to spent so much time together. And if it seems like Mhok again acts like caretaker, he's not. He is a guest now, he can make jokes, he can freely sit with others and he doesn't say another sorry to Mrs. Mhon. He's enjoying cooking for friends and teasing Day.
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Later in another scene (that for sure is a homage to their fitting room scene from the third episode) Mhok said:
You don't have to put up such high walls with me. You know how happy I am when I get to take care of you.
For Day these words raise a question: what taking care of Day means for Mhok now?
And what we need to mention is Day's response to all this flirting:
You're going back in a few days.
That's also a question. For himself. For Mhok. What if going back won't happen? What then?
They continued this walk down memory line with another dining scene. When cake is served Day says something worth quotation.
"Everybody is created for development"
That's when Mhok is saying thank you for breaking up with him. And says something that truly correlates with them having adult's conversation:
I thought you couldn't live without me.
THIS is what tells us that Mhok has grown up due to their separation. When you're young you think that love is about someone you can't live without, but the truth is you can. You have yourself no matter what. And the mature love is about choosing to live this life with someone you can live without, but just don't want to. "Pity" is just a word, but Mhok is apologizing for more complicated thing, for treating Day as someone who can't understand mature things.
Btw, do you have any ideas about this close up of glass? For me it's the representation of something cold starting to warm up. Day?..
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Then the wedding is happening and that's where I started crying for this big family becoming happy again. I think this whole ceremony deserves an award for melting hearts. The way Mrs.Mhon welcomed Phojai. The way Night gave a chance to speak up to his father. The way Day assured Night once again that the accident and the blindness have no effect on a strong bonding between them.
"... everyone should get a second chance. Especially a second chance to make themselves happy"
And then they're dancing. Even without flashbacks we can remember that day when they were dancing for the first time.
You were tense. Your palms were all sweaty.
And another try from Mhok:
If you could see, you would know that from then to now, my feelings for you remain.
And another question-not-question from Day:
... no matter what, you will need to fly back to work anyway.
I didn't see anyone mention this, but for me Day's repeating answers almost scream "tell me you have no reason to go back". Day is trying his best to be mature and he doesn't feel he has any rights to tell Mhok to stay. But he wants it, he wants it so damn much and he's afraid of it.
What you felt then should just stay in that moment.
Are these words for Mhok or Day is actually talking to himself?..
It's not like I wasn't happy with him. But how do I know if I give him a second chance, he won't repeat what he did? I can't live with this feeling for the rest of my life.
Some of you may say: "Won't repeat what? Won't go to Hawaii because of you?". Well, three years later things are different. Back then Mhok wanted to take that chance to start a career, we saw his face when rejecting an offer. Now he's experienced enough to find job anywhere. What Mhok shouldn't repeat is to stay just because he's afraid to leave Day alone. And all that words about repeating Day is also addressing to himself: is he now independent and confident enough to be with Mhok without feeling guilty?
This is love that normal people have. We don't know if it's head or tale but we choose to take a risk in order to step forward.
Some of us find love from the first try. Some of us have to try many times. For some of us it's always different people and sometimes it's the same person. As you growing older you realize that your heart is bigger than you could ever imagine and stronger than you could ever feel.
All of this leads to the one of the most hilarious scene in BL history. That whole airport scene also deserves an award for bringing back that 2000s romantic comedy vibes! Pure art, bravo!
Even though this airport scene didn't result in finding Mhok, they meet each other anyway. And dance. And Day says words that must tell us that he wants to see this world again! And he ask Mhok to be his boyfriend again. Not Mhok is apologizing and pleading as some viewers keep mentioning, but Day is asking for a second chance.
Then we have a glance at Day three years later. He can see again and he's helping a person who can't see.
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At first I didn't get what the writers want to tell us with such a short scene. But later I remembered my cousin's story and now everything makes sense.
A couple years ago my cousin was diagnosed with a cancer. She was living in a small town where there's no doctor even to take all needed tests. She moved to the capital city, she found a doctor. Her family helped with money, and I know that the price for that medical treatment was extremely high for them. She had a surgery... at it didn't work. A cancer was still there, after months of suffering, after all money spent.
She didn't give up. She tried another treatment. She made a doctor to do more check ups. Finally she had another surgery. And it worked. Months later she's in remission, she's clear. She's struggling with having to take pills for the rest of her life. She also gained 20 kg and also started dieting and lost most of that weight.
My uncle, her father, told me all of this and mentioned the most impressive detail. Now she keeps in touch with different people who have cancer via chats to provide psychological support and to give practical recommendations. This story wasn't written by some novelist and wasn't directed by anybody, but could you believe it if I didn't tell you it's about my cousin?
"I have read Last Twilight countless times. I always wondered how Me would live if she had a normal life. I couldn't think of the answer then. Life amidst the dilemma caused me to forget what it was like to live a normal life or how happy I could be. When I finished Last Twilight for the first time, it was like my heart was shattered to pieces. I had always imagined myself as Me. If she disappeared, I must also disappear. But eventually, I realized that everyone had their unique tale to tell. We were made to discover our own preferred version of the novel's final. I consider myself lucky to have gone past the worst page in my novel. But I don't believe that this is the end. I'm still turning the pages"
As you could realize through these quotations, the story of Last Twilight is mostly about Day. And at the same time it belongs to every person around him, like in his favorite The little prince there're many characters that surround the main one.
In the end we see Mhok visiting his parents and Rung with Day. We see close up of Rung's car and there's no band aid on it, but the little scar is still there. What does it mean? I think it means that Mhok also is not covering his scars anymore. Somewhere behind the story we were shown he can finally talk about everything.
- You completely changed my life,Day.
- You completely changed my life too.
- I love you, Day.
- I love you, Phi Mhok.
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As for the main question for the last episode, the mood of it... P'Aof and the writers wanted to show what the storm feels like. If you experienced the hardest part of your life and managed to survive the thought of losing any hope, you will not be the same. You will be funny, you will be ridiculous, you will be spontaneous, you will live your life like it's a damn hard to believe movie.
Btw, we were told a story of a boy who likes sunflowers - the flowers that refuse to stay in the dark🌻
And that's it. That's all, dear readers. If you're here, you should know that it means a lot to me. As much as Mhok and Day I guess. As much as Last Twilight. The story of hope. While writing this analysis I had to omit some details, so I think I will make small posts with different favorite moments. It was a nice journey and I already miss all metas and gifs and memes about Last Twilight every Friday and not only Friday. Let's stay here for other beautiful stories and of course for new stories from Jimmy and Sea and P'Aof!
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euphoricimagination · 4 months
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Summary: After the match against the U-20 you are given 2 weeks of freedom, with your decision taken, you use this time to tell the truth to as many as you can and spend time with the people you grew to love
Part 11 - Part 12 [Final] -> Masterlist
"So this is where you live, quite big for living alone" you say walking around Nagi's place, you could see the last drops of light from the sunset entering through the windows,
After the match you were given 2 weeks off where you could finally go outside. You were planning to go back to Hyogo, but the guys had planned to do a reunion outside of the project to finally see each other in another ambience. You weren't planning on going, since Hyogo was far away from Tokyo and you didn't want to spend half a day just getting there, but Nagi told you you could stay with him for a day or two.
Now, your relationship with Nagi has been quite different since that kiss. He hasn't asked you out, therefore you weren't technically together, but he's definitely much clingier with you; you didn't mind this, though, it was too soon to actually date each other.
"Yeah, my parents chose it" he says, passing his arms through your shoulders "it's nice, and it's close to a lot of things"
"I noticed, i think i saw an arcade coming here"
"Yeah, there's many actually" he says, kissing your shoulder before moving to his bed, starting a game on his phone. You took some of your clothes out, putting them on top of a dresser he had, you feel uneasiness in your stomach for tomorrow's reactions
"Are you telling them tomorrow?" Nagi asks, you didn't know if he noticed your discomfort or if he knew you that good already
"Yeah, I'm telling them everything. They deserve to know"
"I don't get why though, why does it matter so much?"
"Not everyone is so unbothered like you are Sei" you chuckle, sitting on the bed
"But the princess didn't care either, so why are you so nervous?" He asks once again "agh, i died"
"Chigiri…he's different, it's nerve-wracking telling everyone that what they thought was a lie" you say, your feet tapping the floor nervously. Suddenly Nagi's hands wrapped around your waist, pulling you closer to the window in where the stars were starting to appear
"It'll be fine, don't worry too much about it" he pets your head "By the way, that's Choki, he helps me wake up"
"Don't tell me you purposely touch it to wake up" you chuckle
"I won't tell you then" you both stay like this for a few minutes, you watching the view while Nagi lazily lays his head on your shoulder "...are you sure about leaving Blue Lock?"
"Yeah, i already thought about it, it's the best for me and everyone"
"Then I'll allow it" he presses his head closer in your neck
"I don't need your permission" you chuckle "I'm gonna go to arrange the couch"
"The couch? Why?"
"Where else am I going to sleep?"
"You're not sleeping in the couch" you feel him frown, pulling you down into the bed with him as he puts himself on top of you, laying his head on your chest "you're comfy"
"Thanks" you chuckle, playing with his hair "we should order some food, it's pretty late already"
"What a paiin" he whines, getting his phone anyway.
++
You woke up pretty late, around 10 am, with a pair of arms tightly holding in place and warmth feeling warmth breath in the back of your neck. After eating dinner yesterday Nagi decided to cuddle with you while he plays on one of his consoles, you sitting in between his legs as his hands were right in front of both of you; and once you both got tired, he simply laid you down on your side and proceeded to fall asleep.
"Oi, giant baby" you poke his side, making him groan "you're phone just rang"
"What a pain. Who is it?"
"Isagi, we have to meet them, remember?"
"...Right, ugh, don't wanna" he says, answering his messages before stretching out
You get up from the bed and go to the bathroom to get ready, it was late already, so you went to get ready first assuming Nagi will take forever to do something. Once you leave the bathroom Nagi was already sitting, waiting to use it
"You look pretty" he says to you "it's weird seeing you with a skirt, thought"
"This is the first time you see me with outside clothes, of course it's gonna be weird"
"Well yeah, but i like it either way" he kisses your head while going to the bathroom and getting ready. Once done, him wearing an oversized white hoodie and sweatpants, you both go out "hey, let's go that arcade"
"But we have to meet the guys.."
"They can wait, let's go" he takes your hand, dragging you towards the arcade
You decided to give in, after all it was a vacation, you could enjoy things freely for now. At some point you started playing different games, you were stuck in a claw machine while he was playing Street Fighter since he wanted his online record to go up again. After you got another figurine from one of the machines, you heard a big commotion coming from where Nagi was, noticing a bunch of Blue Lock members.
You started to feel nervous, but at this point there was nothing you could do, so you started walking towards them.
"Hey Sei, i got the figurines" you say, instantly getting intimidated by the fact all eyes went to you, looking at you up and down. Chigiri eyes looked at you amused, crossing his arms as he winks at you
"Oya? Did we interrupt a date, Nagi-chin?" Karasu asks with a cheeky grin. Reo was looking at you confused, almost as if he could recognize you
"How did you score such a hottie? You, out of all people" Otoya adds "hi there cutie"
"But didn't you know we had a reunion? Why did you plan it for today?" Asks Yukimiya
"Maybe she's a classmate?" Asks Bachira
"Nah, I've never seen her at our school" adds Reo
"Eh?" Confused faces appear
"Ok, why don't we let her introduce herself so we can know?" Chigiri says, giving you an encouraging look
"Well first…" you go to sit next to Nagi, your heart beating fast "hi again guys"
"I'm Yn…i was your teammate" you say, even more confusion arises
"Yn…Yn-kun? Is that you?" Isagi asks, making you nod "you were a girl all this time?"
"Yep"
"There's no way…how were you able to play in the match against the U-20 while being a girl?" Otoya asks, Chigiri raising his eyebrow annoyed at the comment
"Well, she's just amazing, isn't she?" Chigiri comes closer to ruffle your hair, you trying to stop him
"So you knew, Chigiri? And you Nagi?"
"Yeah" simply shrugs Nagi, as he keeps playing
"Nagi untied my binder and almost saw my chest, then i told Chigiri cause i felt bad about lying to him" you explain, some heads nodding "Ego ask me to join to help Team Z bloom and give him information, i was only supposed to be until the first round, but i proved to be too good to just…leave the project…sorry for lying to y'all"
"It's alright, it doesn't change much to me, especially if Ego knew" Yukimiya says, smiling to you as he extends his hand "it's nice finally meeting you Yn-chan, you're very pretty"
"Thanks" you shake his hand, smiling at him
"Well, that explains why Nagi suddenly started to act like this with you, nice meeting you Yn-chan, take good care of that idiot for me" Reo says nudging your shoulder with a grin, making you roll your eyes
"It doesn't change much for me either! I like you because of you, not your gender!" Bachira passes his arm through your shoulder, hugging you tightly
"Me too, plus you're a good player" Isagi adds, smiling at you like everyone else "but…why are you telling us now? You could have continued like it was, couldn't you?"
"Well, yeah…but I already reached a conclusion. I'm leaving Blue Lock" you confessed, some eyes widen
"What!? Why? You're soo good to just leave!" Retorts Isagi
"Well, I can't tell you exactly what's coming for the project, but it's supposed to help you out for your futures in a more direct way, and I can't have that. I can't be on a professional team because I'm a girl, and I can't play professionally on a woman's team because I'm too used to playing with dudes, so I'm gonna leave the project"
"Well, it makes sense, now that we won against the U-20 there's probably gonna be a lot more professional teams looking at us, you won't be able to hide this type of things to them" adds Karasu, making you nod
"Anyways! Let's enjoy this free day even more then! Since we won't have Yn-chan with us after this" Bachira stands up, grabbing your hand while taking you with him to the claw machines you previously were in
You end up with a lot of prices given to you after some of the guys won in them; then you move to the darts, where Nagi was forced to "accept his punishment" by being in the front of the darts board while you were losing in a battle with Yukimiya; then you move to pool, where Aryu showed his stylish moves; and then to ping pong, where you took turns to play into teams.
"How about karaoke?" Reo asks, his arms on your shoulders as you guys walk
"Let's go"
"We can hear you sing, darling, that'll be interesting" Reo adds, petting your hair
"Shut it, elite, who says I'm singing" you hit his stomach, making him laugh. In that moment you all noticed some girls coming out of a room angry, Aiku being the reason. You didn't know if you wanted to tell him who you were or not, so you stayed quiet while they exchange some words
"Oh? Who's this girl? Of course you would have a girl already, Mikage-kun, but bringing her with you while hanging out with the boys?" Aiku tells him, you exchange a look with Reo, shaking your head slightly
"She's a friend of mine, she happened to be here today too, so she joined us" he says skillfully, understanding your signs as he takes his arm off
"I see…well then, may I know your name, pretty girl?" Aiku says to you, making you scrunch your face. It wasn't that he was ugly, he sure wasn't, but it still made you awkward
"Yn, nice to meet you" you say shortly
"Pretty name for a pretty lady, want to join me?" Aiku winks at you at the same time you feel a pair of hands sneaking on your waist, pulling you back until your back touched a chest and a chin rest on your head
"We fighting?" Nagi says, beside you were also Yukimiya, Karasu, Otoya and Aryu, all saying some type of comments while the door of the U-20 team opens and reveals the whole team there.
"You okay, pretty?" Nagi whispers at you
"Yeah, just didn't know how to react" you say, taking his hand
They decided to bet dinner with a bowling match, in which you find Barou playing by himself, who ends up joining the match since you weren't playing; after all you decided to not tell them about it. You were waiting for Chigiri to play when Barou sits next to you, looking at you inquisitive
"Oi, you are Yn-kun, aren't you?" He asks you
"Eh?"
"Don't play dumb, you are at Blue Lock with us, only a fool wouldn't be able to tell, even though you have make up on today" he says
"Yeah, that's me" you say, high fiving Chigiri when he does a strike
"So, do you swing to the other side or…"
"I'm a girl, but I'm also leaving Blue Lock now" he nods at the information
"You were good, you scrub, well played" he adds, ending the conversation right there
Nagi does a strike after falling down, which ends up with all of you calling the game off since it was getting late. All of the guys say their goodbyes to you, Bachira and Chigiri hugging the longest, leaving you with only Nagi and Reo left
"So, I'm assuming you're staying the night with Nagi again? It's too late for you to leave to Hyogo now" Reo asks
"Yeah, I don't know if leave in two or three days"
"You can stay with me as long as you want, just saying" Nagi adds, petting your hair
"Yeah, you should stay until our vacation is over, since we won't see you in Blue Lock after this we can enjoy time together and you get to enjoy Tokyo more!" Reo says excitedly
"I still haven't got paid by Ego, so i don't have much money" you answer, you were going to get paid for your work after the two weeks were over
"Don't worry about it, I'll cover you" Reo winks at you "besides, if you need money for anything let me know and I'll give it to you"
"What are you? A sugar daddy or something? Do rich people have the need to spend money?" You raise an eyebrow
"Nah, i just don't mind spoiling my treasure's girl, i can afford it after all" he adds
"I mean…if you insist, I'm not denying that offer" you shrugged, making him laugh
"Alright, let's hang out again, bye!" Reo says when you arrived to Nagi's place, his attendant waiting for him in a limousine in front of his place
"Bye"
"See ya!" Both you and Nagi say, entering his place
You took all your makeup off and put on comfortable clothes, which means you were wearing one of Nagi's hoodies since they basically reach your knee. You got out of the bathroom only to find Nagi laying down on his stomach while playing a game, so you go and lay on top of him to watch him
"...you really can stay here as long as you want, by the way" he interrupts the comfortable silence you were in
"I know, but i do also need to go back to Hyogo soon, i have to go back to classes" you say, your head laying on his back
"Classes are such a pain" he whines "can't you just transfer here? I'll ask Reo to help you out"
"Isn't your school one of the best in the country? I doubt that nepotism can just help me enter"
"You'd be surprised" he says
"Even if i transfer I'll have to wait until next year, besides, we don't know where you'll be next year, maybe Blue Lock gets you an offer in an international club and you'll have to transfer there"
"True, that'd be cool" he pauses, moving both of you with ease until you are laying down in the bed with his head on your chest "then I'll tell them to include you too"
"Eh? Why?" You ask
"I like having you around, i like you" he simply states, as if it was the most normal thing to say, as if it was such a simple thing, as if it didn't make your heart flutter "and you like being around me too, so it's a win win"
"Who says I like being around you that much?" You ask
"Your heart beats and your blushed face speak for themselves" he looks at you, slight smirking on
"Shut up" you hit his head
You spent the rest of these two weeks like this, sometimes you hung out with Reo in his penthouse, sometimes you went to the arcade with Nagi, you even got to meet Chigiri's family and stayed with them for a few days after explaining the whole situation. Now two weeks later, you arrived at the place where they were picking the guys up with Nagi and Reo, since apparently a huge crowd of paparazzi were waiting at the entrance of the project.
"This kinda bring back memories" you say
"It does, we didn't even knew each other back then, who knew we would be friends now" Reo says, ruffling your hair "by the way, i already told Baya-san to pick you up later so she can take you to your house"
"You shouldn't have, it's like 5 hours driving" you say
"She insisted too"
"I don't bel-"
"Ynnnn-chaaan!" A scream interrupts you, soon a pair of arms wrap around you and shake you around "you came to say goodbye to us!"
"I did, I can't just let you forget about me, Bachira"
"I will never!" He hugs you tighter
"You're going to kill her if you keep squishing her" Chigiri takes you out of the embrace, pulling you into a side hug himself "you know, I'm sure you can still come with us, just change into a uniform and hope on"
"I can't, i already know what's waiting for you and it's not gonna be beneficial for anyone" you say, knowing well what the phase two of the project was
"But you want to" Chigiri grabs your shoulder, he was able to tell how wet your eyes were, how your hands were shaking slightly, he knew that you still wanted to be with them
"I do…we can't have it all, can we?" You say, making him hug you harder "don't forget about me when you become a famous pro player, you better maintain me once you have money"
"You already have people ready to maintain you, but if it doesn't work out with him or his best friend, I'll think about it" he jokes back, kissing your temple affectionately "see you after I'll become the best in the world, little one"
"See ya" you chuckle, saying some quick goodbyes to some of the ones that enter the bus when a pair of arms wrap around your waist, a pair of arms that were already used to do this
"I'll see you after this, okay?" Nagi says, pulling you closer
"Of course, I'll make sure to watch you, so keep doing your best"
"Watch me? How?"
"You'll find out soon, just do your best and play amazingly like you always do" you say turning around, fluffing his hair
"I will. See you" he bends down, giving you a quick kiss in the lips
"See you"
You watch him enter the bus as it closes the door right behind him, being the last member to enter. Some of them scream their goodbyes to you while the bus leaves, so you wave back at them until you are sure they can't see you clearly, finally letting the tears roll down your face. You wanted to go with them, you wanted to keep playing with them, you wanted to be on the project, but since Blue Lock was turning into a reality TV for scouting, not only you wouldn't be able to keep up the secret but you also won't be able to join any team, it would do nothing more than waste your time. At least that's what you told yourself to feel better about this.
"Hello" Anri appears beside you, looking at you carefully "Ego-san told me to give you this"
She gives you a package, inside was the same uniform the guys were given before leaving, the same custom size you had for the first phase
"He thought you'd miss them, and since you're technically still part of Blue Lock until a few more minutes, we managed to get you one too. It won't make you less sad, but it's the best we can do to help you"
"Thanks" you hug it, smiling through the tears to Anri, who gives you a hug before walking away.
You'll miss them, of course you'll miss those idiots, but you'll see them again once they're on the top, you know you will.
-The end-
Taglist: @suyaaachin - @anurst - @celestair - @futuristicxie - @miyanaranagikenmal-intp - @kaldurahms-lover
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how do you keep your faith even while such horrific things are going on in palestine? i've been a christian all my life and i understand that the question of why god allows suffering is one that people have always been asking, that we can never really know the answer to, but it's just so hard for me to see things like this, all of these innocent people being terrorized and murdered in such evil ways, and understand why god can't stop it from happening. in church we pray for both israel and palestine and it feels so pointless, and just makes me frustrated that i can't actually do anything to stop this. especially knowing that even bethlehem, the place of jesus's birth and home to many palestinian christians, is being attacked and churches are being bombed. it seems pretty clear that the people committing these atrocities are never going to open their hearts and stop, and the world leaders who would have the power to make them stop either don't care or directly support them. i do not want to believe that god doesn't exist, or that god would just sit by and watch all of this happen if it were possible to stop it, but it's such a struggle at times like this. i feel like it shouldn't be and like i should've had this figured out by now. it's okay if you don't answer this, i just love your blog and have learned a lot from it over the years, and am incredibly saddened by the state of the world right now.
Hey there, anon. I feel with you and stand with you in your struggle. I also gently suggest you work on letting go of the sense that you "should" have this figured out by now. Firstly because learning to release myself from "shoulds" is something my therapist taught me and it's been super helpful for showing myself love; secondly because I believe it is deeply, deeply faithful to ask these questions, to demand to know where God is in the face of evil — not just once, but continuously across our lives.
If at any point we think we have it "all figured out," if we think we've reached a fully satisfying solution to the problem of how a good God could "let" evil things happen, we're more likely to be numbed by fatalism or become complacent in the face of injustice. As Rabbi Jonathan Sacks (may his memory be a blessing) put it when asked why God lets bad things happen to good people,
“God does not want us to understand, because if we ever understood, we would be forced to accept that bad things happen to good people, and God does not want us to accept those bad things. He wants us not to understand, so that we will fight against the bad and the injustices of this world, and that is why there is no answer to that question.”
Ask the questions. Bring all that you feel — your grief, your confusion, your frustration, your doubt, your fear — to God. Study and pray and converse with others.
And while you're doing all that, and accepting that it'll be a lifelong exploration, act.
Let your love, your words, your actions be the divine response to injustice — because for whatever mysterious reason, God chooses to act through us, through all who follow Their call to "do justice, love kindness, and walk humbly" (Micah 6:8).
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So yeah, I can't tell you why God doesn't just jump in and stop the evil, why God seems to limit Their own power to intervene (or even to lack that power to begin with), why God respects our free will even when we misuse it to such great harm (though you can see the bottom of this post for places to explore all those questions).
But I can tell you where I believe God is in the midst of all the questions, all the loss, all the suffering — and that's not on some lofty throne indifferently observing our pain; God is right there in the midst of that pain.
Where is God in the face of hate, violence, death? God is co-suffering with us, shouldering the burden with us.
In Exodus 3:7, God says They don't only see the enslaved Hebrews' misery, don't only hear their cries, but that They know the people's suffering — an intimate knowing, as of one who experiences it themself.
In Matthew 25, Jesus tells us that when humanity fails to welcome the stranger, visit the prisoner, feed the hungry, clothe the naked, comfort the oppressed, we fail to do those things for him — for he identifies so intimately with all whom the world calls "least" that he is one with each and every one of them.
So I don't know why God doesn't just fix everything, dammit! — it's the first question I'll be asking Xir when I die, because wtf!!
But I do believe, and I do draw some comfort knowing, that God does not leave us to suffer alone. God is one with the oppressed; God shows ultimate solidarity to the oppressed; and God acts with each of us who act for and with and as the oppressed.
And the good news in the midst in this horror is that there are things that all of us can be doing to act in solidarity with the oppressed!
Our efforts truly are making a difference. Politicians and whole governments across the globe have been startled by the resistance to pro-Israeli propaganda and solidarity with Palestine. The change is slow, but our protests are making an impact. Palestinians have been asking that we keep protesting, boycotting, educating, spreading the word. Because it is helping, slowly but surely.
As long as Palestinians refuse to give in to despair, we too must continue to fight. Palestine will be free. We will not stand silent as genocide occurs.
Boycott as many of the companies named by BDS as you can. Notice that they're focusing on a narrower, more targeted group of companies than some of the enormous lists people keep sharing — that's to help us avoid becoming overwhelmed! So boycott what you can from their list; these are the companies directly contributing to Israel's violence. And spread their list to anyone you can.
If you live in a country with a government that has yet to join the call for a ceasefire — and especially if you, like me here in the US, live in a country that is actively funding/otherwise supporting Israel's violence — call or email your representatives to demand a ceasefire.
Resistbot can help make that easy, in the US at least.
Educate yourself about the history of Palestine and Israel. It's important so that you can recognize lies and propaganda, and also so you can speak knowledgeably about the issue with others. It's also important because understanding and simply bearing witness are two big things Palestinians ask of us. You don't need to know everything, but know enough to bear witness, to remember the loss, and to debunk bullshit when you see it.
Here are some places you can get educated — link to free ebooks; article on current events; article with current perspectives from Gaza; and I've been reblogging news & resources as I see them over on @a-queer-seminarian
Post about what Gaza is going through on social media!! Don't let the fight die down! Talk about it with friends or others you think might be swayed to join the fight if they had the information that most media stations are failing to report on.
Stand up against Islamophobia in all forms.
Stand up against antisemitism in all forms. As Christians, this includes recognizing and uprooting supersessionism in our biblical interpretation, our liturgy, our hymns, etc. It also means learning about Christian Zionism.
One of Israel's primary arguments for the "necessity" of its oppression of Palestine is that Israel is necessary because nowhere else on earth is safe for Jews. They're right that nowhere else is safe for Jews; but they're wrong that Israel is safe for Jews — an settler-colonialist state, a war zone, a state that requires every civilian to serve some time in the military, is not safe for Jews either. But as long as they can point to the antisemitism rampant across the globe, they can use that as an argument. So to counter Israel, and much more importantly to stand in solidarity with Jewish people across the world, don't let antisemitism go unchecked.
Join in protests in your area. Follow Jewish Voices for Peace or Jews Against White Supremacy for info on such events.
Link to places to offer fin.ancial support
Want more ways to act? Check out https://www.palestineaction.org/
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There is no easy answer to the question of suffering — but even so, it can be helpful to explore it deeper, to examine what conclusions others have drawn over the eras. If you want some resources for your wrestling, here are some:
This post goes into the basics of theodicy, the "the intellectual effort to jerry-rig three mutually exclusive terms into harmony: divine power, goodness, and the experiences of evil"
Then there's my #theodicy tag where I put all posts / links about this issue
I also have a long-ass YouTube video diving deep into "the problem of suffering"!
___
I hope this response brings you comfort and courage, friend. Don't be afraid of questions, of grief, of concern — let them galvanize you for the struggle. Solidarity forever <3
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