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#but we planned it out and we planned so many things and they're gone
ofswordsandpens · 2 days
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Am I the only one who thinks about how The Lightning Thief would have gone if instead of Grover, Percy picked Luke to go with him and Annabeth on the quest? Luke, who was sick of the idea of doing quests that had already been done was just picked to go on a unique quest by this demigod who he was planning to manipulate, and the quest was unique because he helped to make it so. And while he'll likely be plotting to hide the fact that he's a lightning thief, reworking things to take heat off himself, one of his quest mates would be Annabeth, the half blood he personally saved and brought to camp, whom he would have to work like hell to hide his deeds from.
listen I'm loving the comedic potential of this because in my heart of hearts, I feel like Luke's too enamored with the idea of razing Olympus for him to doubt what he's doing, but balancing that razors edge where he's actively trying to sabotage the quest and kill Percy while not tipping off Annabeth, and also trying to plant seeds of doubt and discord both between Percy and Annabeth and also about the gods while trying not to be too obvious about it because maybe, just maybe he can convince Annabeth to side with him.
except as usual Luke's nefarious plans are constantly being foiled by 2 tweens and its embarrassing cause they're not even trying. Percy's not wearing the shoes and keeps making up polite reasons on why he can't without seeming like he's rejecting Luke's gift (cause that would be rude) and Annabeth's like "well I'm gonna wear them then" and Luke's panics like "NO" but he also can't wear them so then they just stay in the bag untouched. then Luke keeps directing them into the paths of monsters in the hopes Percy's gonna get taken out but holy hell this kid just won't die. Like literally just escapes mortal peril by the skin of his teeth and doesn't even realize it. It's like an old silent film where the entire front of the house falls off and the guy survives because he just happened to be standing right where the open window is.
Then Luke's also trying to stir up some anger at the gods, testing the waters with Annabeth, but she's so in the height in the idealization of her mom it's getting no where. Luke's trying to be subtle like "hey... don't you think it's kinda of fucked up that the gods are..... uh... blaming? percy for this? and that he has to do this quest to set things right" but annabeth's like "what do you mean by that? 🤨 this is what heroes do this is how we prove ourselves" and unfortunately Percy is the only one vibing with the "hey don't you hate your dad" comments that's Luke's throwing down and that makes him fond of Percy against his better judgement but he's still gotta kill him so you know, bummer
anyway, in this quest AU Percy perceives Luke as the Responsible Adult cause he's 19 (lmao) and thus feels a little less pressure to be responsible for things himself and so when they get to the Underworld, Luke's like smirking, grinning, cause a. he's in in the Underworld and how many heroes have achieved that? b. the shoes in Percy's bag are about to drag that kid to the depths of hell or c. the lightning bolts about to appear in the bag and Luke will throw Percy under the bus to Hades (he's been practicing his betrayal speech) except wait "Percy... where's your backpack??" and Percy's like "oh I forgot it at the hotel 👉👈" and Luke loses it and picks him up to throw him into tartarus himself (he is unsuccessful)
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strawberrynightmare · 7 months
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Mikey, Baji & Inupi getting whacked while they're trying to wake you up
Content warning: These take place during/after a sleepover! Tickling, something awful happens in Mikey's fic
Mikey
~Modern problems require modern solutions 🤠
~Late, late in the night, you were playing all kinds of games. Cards, truth or dare, illuminati, board games, video games, fire boy and water girl, you name it. Mikey was reaching the peak of competitiveness and you were not far behind.  
~And you would have been long knocked out had it not been for the sugar rush the two of you were on. Needless to say… the two of you were more than a bit hyperactive. 
~It was good after two am that a blood-curling crisis made its way into your blissful playtime. 
The two of you looked at each other in horror, as if to make sure you were not imagining things. But this dreadful situation went beyond human imagination. After a few minutes of deadly silence, your lover spoke in a quiet, shaky voice. 
“We ran out of snacks.”
~Even though the two of you stocked up so well beforehand, it was all gone now. After some good 15 minutes of crying about it, a rock paper scissors match began. Of course, the loser had to go through the hardships of getting their ass up, dressing up, going to the nearest 24/7 convenience store and buying some more food. 
~And he lost.
~As he dragged himself through the room, you could swear it looked like he was going to his own execution. He mumbled under his breath but the two of you were so out of it, you didn’t care and he didn’t even know what he was mumbling in the first place.
~He was back pretty soon but still found you passed out on the floor of his room. Your boyfriend didn’t think much about it when he began to gently kick your side. 
“Wake up, y/n I’ve got your favourite cookies.” ~Guy who looked and sounded like a zombie
~He knelt down to unpack the two bags of snacks while continuing to nudge you with his hand. And next thing he knew was a kick to his jaw as you shifted from laying on your back to your side. 
~He blinked a few times, instinctively touched his chin, sat there for a while, then stood up to turn off the light and fell asleep next to you. 
~Via the two of you trying to figure out how he got a bruise on his jaw after you woke up. 
Baji
~Aaand he took that personally 🙄
~It was definitely not a great idea to have a sleepover at his house on a Wednesday, but he got a bit impatient. For three whole days, you listened to him complaining about not sleeping well and insisting that the cure would be you sleeping over. 
~”What is it? I’m telling you, my mom likes you anyways. And if I sleep well, my grades will be better too!”
You’ve slept well for so many years, and the good grades were never in sight.”
”That’s foul, y/n!”
~In the end you settled for a study sleepover. Instead of messing around, the plan was to study together for some time and then go to sleep at a reasonable hour. Yeah, the plan was all it was.
~You were able to go through two pages of your textbooks before getting utterly distracted and doing whatever the hell you wanted. You ended up sneaking out even before the clock struck midnight and enjoyed the city basked in the night to your heart’s content. It was heavily past 2am when you came back and it was only because it started raining.
~Soon afterwards you fell asleep cuddling into his chest with his arm around your shoulder.
~And he recklessly followed you into the land of dreams without any awareness of what was going to happen in the morning. 
~He was woken up by his mother at the usual hour. Mrs. Baji brought you two breakfast straight into his room and as he was half awake, she urged him to wake you up as well. In a half-awake state, he barely began to complain and tell her to wake you up herself before she cut him off with “I tried”.
~In his defence, he thought that shaking your arms lightly and calling out your name would be enough to wake you up. Jokes on him, you didn’t even budge. He tried everything his mother ever used on him, taking away your blanket, rubbing your back, hell, he even tried to wake you up with a kiss - nothing worked.
~He was absentmindedly poking your cheek while trying to come up with something else. All he could think of was a glass of cold water or calling his friends. It was then that he suddenly got smacked in the face with a pillow. The force of the hit was enough to have him rolling out of the bed. His traitor pillow was dropped right next to him. All you did was roll onto your side. Still asleep. 
~If his loud ‘HAA????’ didn’t manage to wake you up, you might as well have been dead. Anyways, prepare because he took that as a declaration of war. How does a sleeping person prepare for anything
~He climbed back, pushed you onto your back and began to mercilessly tickle you in all the weak spots he was aware of. He even took a feather out of his pillow and began tickling your feet and that was the final straw, for you to wake up completely disoriented, fall from the bed and instinctively kick your boyfriend off the bed. Both of you ended up on the floor, but Baji didn’t even notice that. He was too busy patting himself on the back and praising his genius for managing to wake you up.
~All while he existed there in a half-conscious state, trying to comprehend the whole situation. 
~And then he dragged you to school. You were late because waking you up almost took him a whole hour. 
~Surprisingly, he managed to take the test and actually answer enough questions for you to consider him passing it. 
~So now he has an excuse to invite you in more often. Although he did learn to only do this on weekends so that you can sleep for as long as you wish, Sleeping y/n is the one person he’s too afraid to face again.
Inupi
~Bro gave up 💀
~It happened during a sleepover. The two of you were on the couch and watching a movie late in the night. He excused himself for a while when he noticed someone koko calling him. The call lasted longer than expected and when he came back, you were already asleep.
~All he wanted was to gently wake you up by rubbing your cheek so that you could move to his bigger and more comfortable bed. Totally not because he wanted to cuddle you. Not at all. 
~But then he got smacked with a pillow you  were clutching to your chest so hard, the force made him fall backwards and land on his ass. You were still asleep as he sat there, trying to comprehend what just happened. 
~He wasn’t even sure whether you were just pretending to sleep to take the sofa or it was really just you reacting to unwanted stimuli. 
~He sighed and simply went back to his room to gather the blankets and cushions. Then, he slipped a cushion under your head, gently fixed it into a more comfortable position and wrapped you up in a blanket. After that, he just made some adjustments for himself and sat next to you, leaning his body on yours.
~This fixed the issue the two of you always had. The issue was called ‘Who takes the bed?!’. While he insisted that you should take it, you insisted that it was his bed and you were fine with the couch. But he was also fine with the couch and he couldn’t just- sleep comfortably in his warm bed and make you sleep out there. Sharing the bed felt so intimate that none of you dared to suggest it although i know some of ya simps would jump at the first gotten chance to share a bed with him
~...So the two of you are now sharing a couch, but he swore that the next time, you’re taking the bed even if he has to drag you in there himself.
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creedslove · 8 months
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WHO KNEW? 💍💔
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No outbreak!Joel Miller x f!reader
"You took my hand, you showed me how
You promised me you'd be around (...)
I took your words and I believed in everything you said to me (...)
If someone said three years from now, you'd be long gone, I'd stand up and punch them out, 'cause they're all wrong
I know better, 'cause you said forever, and ever, who knew?"
Summary: You and Joel had been married for a few months when he broke things up with you because he'd fallen in love with someone else, Sarah's mom. You parted ways but more than a decade later you end up meeting Sarah and that leads you to face your ex-husband one more time
• Inspired by this amazing HEADCANON request ❤️
Warnings: angst, broken hearts, asshole!Joel, divorce, infidelity, pregnancy, fluff (a little, maybe?) age gap (Joel is four to five years older than reader and the time skip is 12 to 14 years (Sarah's age) but feel free to imagine whatever you want)
A/N: Hi guys!!! I got obsessed with this story ever since I received that ask and turned into a headcanon but it wasn't enough, I had to write a longer, fuller version of this story! I think it's so appealing because we are all used to Joel being our knight in shining armor, always the perfect husband/boyfriend and well, here we can see another part of him. It's not a crime to fall in love with someone else, but the way he broke reader's heart was very mean. Also, I didn't specify reader's profession, just keep in mind she studied A LOT and now she makes good money, but feel free to idealize her job the way you want. Anyway, I hope you enjoy this story, besties ❤️
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You never really understood why some people told you getting married so young would be a mistake. It didn't make sense to you, at all. You and your soon-to-be husband Joel, were young, yes, but you loved each other deeply. You figured it didn't take much more than that to make a happy marriage.
You were fresh from highschool, always had good grades and it didn't take long for you to be accepted in many different institutions, and yet, you decided it would be a good idea to take a sabbatical year in order to get yourself sorted out, maybe get a job and save up some money and enjoy your marriage a little. Joel was very supportive of you, even if he knew you would eventually leave for college and you would both have to make it work long distance.
Joel was just a couple of years older, he'd just left the military and he also needed to know what to do in life, in order to support his wife, he didn't have the book smarts his girl did, but he was kind-hearted and hard-working. He also hadn't planned on getting married that young, but before he could even try to make any sense out of it, he was deeply in love with you.
So Joel proposed, you said yes, his dad helped him get a small, but cute house and the two of you started your new wed life.
For the first few months, everything was a bed of roses; you were so in love, that man was simply intoxicating. His touches, his kisses, his body, his smell, everything about him was addictive to you and you couldn't be without it.
You had found yourself a part time job as a sales clerk at a baby clothes store at the mall, just as Joel was working as an apprentice in the construction business, it was a very hard job, and just in a matter of a couple of months, you saw your boyfriend becoming bigger and more muscular. He worked hard for you, for your relationship, your marriage and the future family you would build in a couple of years. Even if your friends had told you it was madness getting married so young and your family had asked you not to do it, everything was just fine, what could go wrong?
Every single day, Joel would come back home, tired from work, and he would be welcomed by you in your fullest housewife version. Dinner all ready, house spotless clean and a loving wife dying to be in his arms. He would not disappoint you, taking you into his arms, lifting you up, pressing you against the wall, his kisses were so urgent, so needy of you, his hands roamed all over your body as you felt his cock throbbing. Every night next to your handsome husband Joel was a delight, it was your personal piece of heaven, nothing could stop the two of you when you were together, but eventually, it happened.
You didn't know exactly how it started, or when for that matter, it was all a thick fog in your mind, being unable to say precisely when your marriage began falling apart. Perhaps it happened sooner than you thought but you were just too naive or too blind to see; first thing you noticed, were the kisses; they were gone. No kissing before going to work in the morning but you shrugged it off, thinking that maybe Joel was just in a rush to get to work. Though you really missed them, your skin seemed to burn and ache for his touch, you didn't want to seem like a clingy wife, or nag him with unimportant things. Whenever he came back from work, he was still all yours; that's why it took you long enough to notice it.
Every evening, he came back with the same hunger he felt, only this time, he didn't seem to have felt that hunger for you per se, more like a desire within that needed to have you to help him relieve it.
He took you every single night, he gave you pleasure, simple, raw, indifferent pleasure. You didn't actually remember the last time you actually made love, because everytime Joel touched you, he always had you on your hands and knees for him, always fucking you on your back. At the time you thought it was just some kink or something like that, but now it was pretty clear to you it was just the easiest way for Joel to close his eyes and pretend you were someone else.
It was just simply fucking, a means to get to an end.
Then, he began getting home later and later, sometimes he would be too late for dinner, or he would just skip it entirely. Never explaining exactly what he was doing or why he was spending less and less time at home.
"Sorry babe, just had a sandwich with the guys"
That's what he would say before shrugging and going straight to the bedroom; not taking his time to actually see you'd cooked his favorite or that you were starving because you'd waited for him until that hour. The weekends weren't different at all, at first, right after you two got married, you'd spend the entire day in bed, just enjoying each other's company, each other's bodies and love; caresses full of affection carried with lust, turned into nothing more than just a memory some months later. Every weekend Joel simply got up, had breakfast and told you he was heading for work; and he would spend the entire day there, no phone calls to let you know he wouldn't be back for lunch nor calls to tell you he would grab a few drinks with the guys.
Always the guys, and as much as you tried to convince yourself it was indeed just one drink, or a burger, or a soccer match with the guys, your heart was sending you signals, trying to warn you there was something seriously wrong. Yet, you chose not to believe it, you told yourself it was actually kind of cruel of you to have such thoughts about your poor hard-working husband. What kind of wife would you be if you became paranoid while Joel was just working hard to provide you a good life?!
Joel was so busy with his work he barely even noticed when you asked for a double shift on Saturdays. Not that you liked working at the mall, but if you were going to stay alone all the time, you figured you would at least earn some money. Maybe Joel was just stressed about having to put up with the bills all by himself, you reminded yourself. Perhaps things would be back at what they were in the beginning, you were now marking six months of marriage and you knew this wasn't supposed to be happening. Your husband wasn't supposed to be that uninterested in you, he wasn't supposed to be indifferent towards your presence or so ungrateful, and yet you decided to fight for his love, after all, you loved him more than anything, more than anyone, it was an overwhelming feeling but you simply couldn't move on from it.
You waited for Joel another night, you'd made dinner, but of course he said he wasn't very hungry because he had grabbed a bite to eat with the guys.
Your heart clenched, he didn't kiss you, nor held you, it was like you were two different people sharing the same house; not lovers, not husband and wife, perhaps not even friends anymore. It felt each time more and more empty next to Joel, but you tried. You sat down and had dinner on your own, as he glued himself to the TV, watching whatever it was on. You knew him enough to know his mind was drifting away, thinking of something or someone, you weren't sure, the only thing you were a hundred percent sure was that he did everything at his willpower so he wouldn't have to spend time with you. It hurt, like a knife piercing through your chest, it was humiliating and you still didn't know why you were insisting. You swallowed after dinner and walked to the couch, he was nearly asleep and you ran your hands through his hair, feeling how soft his curls were; you had missed dearly times like that, it had been only a few months prior and yet, it felt like an eternity. The way your Joel would come to you, crave your touch, and just overall pay attention to you, unlike the haunting reality that you had to face, in which your husband simply began to ignore you, as if you weren't much more than a shadow, or an invisible and yet quite annoying presence. You looked down at his sleepy and peaceful form, he always looked so young and innocent when he slept it always warmed your heart.
The tip of your fingers ran through his scalp once more, he had always loved that particular display of affection. Minutes passed while you stroked his hair, you could feel Joel shifting softly under your touch, satisfied groans coming out like purrs as he began to slowly open his eyes
"Angela.." he murmured under his breath, but it was loud enough for you to catch it.
At that moment you felt as if you'd lost all balance, gripping the couch and staring at him in disbelief
"Who's Angela?" Your voice suddenly loud and serious, making Joel snap away from the sleeping haze he was in and stare into your eyes. He was carefully not to give it away immediately
"What are you talking about?" He got up from the couch, determined to turn his back to you
"You said a name. Angela, who's she?"
"I don't know what you're talking about, Y/N, stop being crazy"
Your blood boiled at the accusation.
For months all you did was try to be the perfect housewife, you cooked, cleaned, worked and brought home the little money you made in order to win back your husband's attention, not only that, you didn't want to have to give away to everyone who told you you would be making a mistake by marrying so young. It had been so difficult to actually admit to yourself your marriage was at a risk, and now you just had enough proof. After months of indifference, your husband was now mumbling another woman's name; as if it wasn't bad enough, he was trying to make the tables turn by accusing you of being crazy. That was so typical of men, but not of your Joel, you thought he would never do that, you were so sure he was honest, honorable, a decent human being, he wouldn't hurt you on purpose in order to prove his point. Or so you thought.
"Don't you fucking dare call me crazy, Joel Miller, for the past couple of months you haven't given a shit about me, you're never home, you never spend time with me, you don't hug me, don't kiss me, you don't even fuck me anymore, and now you are mumbling someone else's name? Who's she? Is she your mistress? How long have you been with her?"
Again, you tried being strong, you really did, but your voice cracked, and the tears threatening to escape now ran freely down your cheeks, he'd walked away from you, but you managed to corner him in the kitchen, you were tired of being blinded by your own feelings, at the same time you were tired of being played by Joel, he had no right to act that way.
"Answer me, Joel!!! Who's the fucking whore?!" You yelled at him, the impatience and anxiety creating an explosive combination inside of you. You were so close to solving the mystery that haunted you at the same time you didn't wanna hear any further word. You just wished you could close your eyes and make all that away, you wish you could just wake up and see the last couple of months were nothing but a nightmare and that you still had the same good old loving Joel Miller as the best husband in the world; instead, he simply groaned, rubbing his face and looked down, not having the courage of look at you in the eyes.
"She's not a whore, don't call her that. I-We.. we're in love. I met her at work, she's the receptionist there and we hit it off… she's gorgeous, funny and I fell for her" he swallowed not sure where the strength to be honest with you about his feelings was coming from, but it was enough to make eye contact "I've never cheated on you, Y/N, I haven't slept with her yet, I haven't even kissed her, but I think she's the one, I wanna be with her, I'm not gonna lie to you anymore"
"You don't love me anymore?" That was all you could ask, out of all the cruel and raw information he suddenly threw on you, the only thing you could register was the lack of feelings from the man who swore to love you forever one day.
"Jesus, Y/N, let's not do this now" he groaned, wanting to shift all that anger towards you, somehow blaming you for what happened so he wouldn't be consumed by his own guilt. He wasn't blind, he knew you loved him, he knew you waited at the door for him every single day, with dinner ready a pie in the oven and giving you those sad, heart eyes in hopes of receiving his affection once more. You reminded him of a puppy, as bad as it sounded, all it took you to be happy was a crumble of his love. What angered Joel was that you weren't satisfied with just crumbles, you wanted more and more from him, and he was unavailable; he simply couldn't give it to you, because his heart belonged to someone else. He hadn't planned on that happening, if it were up to him, he would've honored the vows he took on his wedding day, but Angela walked into his life without a warning and swept him off his feet. He couldn't stay with you out of pity, you deserved to be happy and so did you, but you weren't meant to be together.
"Do you love me or not, Joel?! Did you even love me?" Another grunt from his lips, you were so frustrated you didn't know how to rationalize, how to wrap your head around the fact he proposed to you, he had promised you the world and yet now he was treating you as if you had never mattered to him. His cowardice made you sick, he wasn't even man enough to look you in the eyes, you felt so angry a part of you was glad his body blocked your access to the silverware set because if you got your hands into it you knew at that moment you were willing to make a mistake. You gripped his shirt, slapping his chest and scratching him in a sloppy way, demanding answers from him. He could stop you at any moment, Joel was bigger and stronger than you, but he let you have your moment of hurting him out of pity, before calming gripping your arms and pushing you away
"I guess it's obvious I don't love you anymore, I love Angela, it's not my fault, it just happened, but I'm sure I want to be with her, you and I can't keep lying to ourselves, you can't keep lying to yourself, we're over, just as the love I felt from you, it's over…"
•••
You didn't remember much more after that. Some flashes of the following days, where the initial shock was still going strong, the waves of sadness mixed with anger, how Joel gathered some of his clothes and left the house that same night - probably to go to Angela's, how you refused to eat for the couple of days, you didn't talk to anyone, just spent your time alternating between crying yourself to sleep and actually sleeping, were just moments of blur. At some point you remember Tommy - Joel's brother checking up on you just to make sure you were alright. Tommy was the youngest of the Miller brothers, he was said to be the inconsequential one, but he would never do what his older brother had done.
Only after a few days Joel stopped by the house you once had shared, he had heard from his brother the pitiful mess you'd become because of him, and though a part of him didn't have the courage to ever face you again, another part - a more honorable one - insisted on it because he had to give you some kind of explanation. So after work, he didn't drive to Angela's like he'd been doing for the last few days, becoming his sweet routine and bringing so much joy now that he was free to love her just as much as she wanted to love him. Instead of going to his happy place, Joel drove back to the house that used to be his home for a while, a place where he'd been happy but it hadn't been enough for him. It was funny how he expected things to be drastically different, because his life had taken a dramatic turn just as yours had, and yet, things were just the same, or they appeared to be at least. He got off his truck, seeing that not a lot had changed, but this time there wasn't music coming from the house, it didn't smell like fresh cooked dinner, simply the living room with the lights on were the only thing that showed there was still someone in the house.
When he walked in, he expected to see you crying, depressed and begging him to get back, but much to his surprise, all your bags were already nearly packed and though it was visible you'd had some rough time by dark circles under your eyes and how pale your skin was, you welcomed him with a emotionless expression on your face, pointing at the couch, so he would take a seat and you could talk things through. After all the crying and suffering, you felt as if something had clicked and suddenly you went from heartbroken to numb. You knew the swirl of feelings would come and go, but taking advantage of your numbness, you put your head into place as best as you could and packed all your things, you didn't want to stay at that place surrounded by Joel memories, knowing he'd left the place you once called home and you were both so happy and also so unhappy in a short span of time. You wanted to put yourself back together, heal from him, forget he ever existed, go back to studying and focus on yourself only. But for that to happen, you wanted closure, not only wanting, you needed closure.
His low apologies combined with the rambling that came out of Joel's mouth was getting on your nerves, why couldn't he man up and actually tell you what he needed to in order to finally close that chapter in your lives.
"If you're not getting straight to the point, I will, Joel… I packed my bags, I am leaving this house, it's yours, your family managed to help you with it and I wouldn't feel comfortable living here. I'll go to college as soon as the next semester starts and I'll be waiting for the divorce papers, sign it as soon as possible, and pretend this never happened"
"Wait… what?! You want to divorce?!" Joel was quite shocked, not that he didn't want to divorce, because he did, so he could finally be officially with Angela, but he didn't think it would be that easy for you to agree, let alone be the one suggesting it.
You laughed. It was a dry, ironic laughter, because honestly, you didn't think Joel was that much of a dick, it was fascinating how he broke your heart and he still found a way to have his ego bruised by the fact you wouldn't accept being in a submission position, that you wouldn't cry and beg for him.
"What did you expect Joel?! That I would stay here, legally married to you, cooking and washing your dirty underwear while you go out of the door and keep cheating on me with that whore? Seriously? That's how low you think of me?"
"I already told you she isn't a whore and I have never cheated on you, that's why I want to divorce, us getting married was clearly a mistake and it's not my fault if I don't love you anymore.."
"So whose fault is it? Mine?! Do you really think what you did isn't cheating, Joel? Just because you hadn't fucked her while we were still together, but you had spent time with her, emotionally connected with her, fuck, just the fact you let her get closer to you even though you were married, that's cheating! You say it isn't because you don't want to feel guilty, but deep down inside you just know it is! I agree with you on one thing, though: our marriage was a stupid mistake, because of you I delayed a whole year of my life, I almost sacrificed my future because I really took your words and believed them, that we would be together, I never thought out of all the people in the world, you would be the one to hurt me! I trusted you, do you even know how many times I cried and sulked because I blamed myself for your behavior? The amount of times I felt guilty for even remotely considering the possibility of you having someone else? Because in my mind you'd always been the perfect husband and yet, you were backstabbing me day after day, with that slut!"
"Don't you fucking call her a slut! She's not a slut, she's not a whore! It's not her fault if you are a petty envious woman!"
"She is a slut Joel, I'm sure of it, because if she had any decency she wouldn't have come closer to a married man, my husband! She is probably excited about the thrill, but I'm certain that once the reality hits and she sees herself locked inside having to carry out chores everyday, take care of the house, the husband and even the kids if you two ever come to it, it's not gonna be as fun, and then you'll meet her for real. I don't wish you anything bad, but god help you if you ever have to face a disappointment as big as mine"
You dried your tears and began removing your wedding ring, it was quite pricey taking into account how complicated your financial situation was. You intended to return it to him, but the mere thought of maybe Joel taking the ring and handing it to his former mistress and soon-to-be official girlfriend, was enough to make you nauseated. You gave up removing it and left the ring right there.
"I'm leaving this place tomorrow, you can send the divorce papers over to my parents' and I hope I'll never see you again, Joel"
•••
You wished you could say that was the last time you ever saw Joel Miller in your life, but unfortunately, things weren't too easy for you. Only two months before you could finally enter college and forget about the disastrous year you had, you were working double shifts at the mall, in hopes of saving a decent amount of money for yourself. It was supposed to be another lazy evening, in which you would have to kill time until you could go home, you had just had your break and as you walked back into the store, you couldn't help but pay attention to your left hand. The wedding ring still there. It brought you shame and embarrassment, the mere fact you left it there. You often lied to people and to yourself by saying it was a way of keeping disrespectful customers away, but the truth was, you just didn't know why it was so hard to do it. It felt like a weight you couldn't get rid of, a part of your life that seemed like nothing but delusion.
You were scared of removing that ring, it was a sign that Joel wouldn't be much more than a memory to you, and even if you knew that was exactly what you needed, your heart still yearned for him. It wasn't fair, to still love the person who had hurt you the most, burying deep those feelings but also knowing they were there was nerve wracking.
You were ready to get back to work, just about to enter the store you were so used to spending your whole day when you felt paralyzed.
"What do you think of this one, darling? Do you think our baby will like it?"
It was Joel's voice.
His voice.
Darling.
Our baby.
You stopped yourself right there, too far away from their distracted eyes, taking in all the colorful and beautiful options they had before them, but also close enough so you could actually hear the conversation. Joel Miller was going to be a dad, it was a fact, you weren't having a nightmare that you were about to wake up in cold sweat at any minute, instead, he was there, with her, the woman he dumped you for, the woman who was now carrying his child. Under the shelves you'd been hiding, you could only catch a glimpse of her baby bump, and the way Joel's hand rested over it in a protective way. It was enough to make your stomach upset, your eyes burning with the tears that once more insisted on appearing. He had moved on from you, much faster than you had moved on from him; their happiness could be beautiful to anyone, but to you it was disgusting, infuriating, they had no right to come to your place of work and be so glad about life itself.
You couldn't actually see Angela's face, all you were able to watch from where you stood was Joel's hand on her womb, his right one, but the moment he rested his left one on her waist, you gasped softly. The wedding ring was gone.
Joel wasn't feeling that comfortable about being at that particular store, though it was the only decent baby clothing store at the mall, he knew you worked there or at least used to; but Angela wanted new baby stuff and he was going to be a dad, so it was his duty to take her and help her sort things out. He thought of you, not having seen you or listened to your voice in months he sort of missed you? He couldn't lie to himself, he was glad to be divorced, he was happy in a relationship with a baby on the way, but you'd been important to him too, he wished things didn't have to end the way they did, he has gotten used to living with you, seeing you, kissing you, touching you, it was natural that he missed the dynamics you two had established. A part of him sort of wanted to run into you at the store, he wanted to see how you were doing, if you were taking good care of yourself, but it was a relief to everyone you weren't there. It would be just awkward and embarrassing to be baby clothes shopping in front of you. And of course, he never wanted to hurt you more than he had already done it, but you would have probably interpreted it as provocation.
He scratched down his head while Angela picked all her favorites, Joel tried hard not to pay attention to the price tags, money was still a delicate matter for the two of them, but he had managed to get some by selling his wedding ring. Of course the pair would've been worth a lot more, but he couldn't go after you to ask for your ring, so he just negotiated his own and took the money. It wasn't the ideal situation, but in a few months they'd welcome the tiny little person that would become the most important thing in Joel's life.
You were too hurt to continue watching their display of happiness, you turned your back to the place you were hiding and you returned to the small break room. That was indeed the last time you'd seen Joel Miller; that was it until you also met someone who brought chaos but also colors into your life.
•••
"Aren't you too old to sell cookies door to door for school?" Joel asked while chewing his scrambled eggs and slurped his coffee, watching as his daughter rolled her eyes at him
"Aren't you too old not to eat your vegetables?" She snapped back at him in their usual morning routine.
Sarah was a teenager, much to Joel's sadness, as he still had serious attachments to when she was younger. He knew it was part of life, and watching her blossoming into a beautiful young girl made him proud and hopeful about the future, he knew his sweet Sarah would go far. But that also made him scared, because no matter how irrational it was, Sarah always reminded him of you; and he knew that if any guy ever dared to do to his baby girl, what he did to you, he would be really to kill him in no time. Joel Miller would like to think he had improved a lot as a human being, after all, he wasn't a young man anymore, he was a full grown adult, who had to get himself together and mature after he was abandoned by his girlfriend with a newborn baby. Life was full of irony and he was one to witness it, being left by the woman he loved and trusted a little more than a year after he was the one who walked away from someone who loved and trusted him. It was what everyone said: karma is really a bitch.
Through the years, Joel really felt an urge to call you, perhaps ask you to meet him, so you could catch up and he could finally apologize to you, but he had lost all contact with you. In fact he had no idea what you were up to through the decades, the few times your parents ran into him on the street or at the grocery store and made sure to ignore his presence and pretend they'd never met. He just couldn't approach them and ask for your phone number. Besides, what would he even tell you?
"Hey, I just wanted to tell you the woman I left you for also left me, so now I'm a lonely single dad and I realized I took you for granted and maybe if you ain't busy, we could go for a cup of coffee or something?!"
It would be just straight up stupid, not to mention he was sure you would've found someone nice, someone worthy of you, probably you'd be married by then, perhaps you'd have a kid or two, and he was sure you'd be an amazing mother, because he just knew you were an amazing wife, and he was the only one to blame for not treating you the way you deserved it.
So Joel decided it was best if he pretended nothing ever happened just like you did with him, of course destiny had other plans.
He gave Sarah a ride to school and went to work. It would be another busy day, like all of his days, in which he would work hard in order to save as much money as he could, wanting to assure his daughter the future she deserved. For Sarah, it meant another day of classes and selling cookies. She didn't like the activity, but she didn't hate it either. In fact, on that particular day she felt kind of excited as she was about to head towards the 'good' part of the neighborhood, where most houses were big and seemed expensive. Getting her backpack and her stash of goodies to sell, she left home and went on with her day.
You, on the other hand, hadn't planned on coming back to Austin so soon, as the years turned into a decade, and then a little bit more than that, you had dedicated yourself fully to your academic and professional life, focusing on yourself only, managing to bury deep your memories of Joel and never paying attention to anything remotely close to a love life.
Yes, you'd had relationships, affairs, and you'd been with a few guys: one of them was Javier, he was a handsome but very slutty cop who you had a no-string relationship with; it was good for a while, he was handsome, sexy and he fucked like no other, but he had a taste for women that unabled himself to keep it inside of his pants. You liked the freedom, but that was too much.
You also dated a guy named Dave for a brief period, he was nice, also painfully handsome, a tiny bit mysterious about his high profile government job, but he wanted a family, not just another relationship. He wanted marriage and kids, and you were just out of it in no time. The last straw was when you were traveling back home and during one stop for dinner at a small, cozy bar, a guy dressed entirely in cowboy attire came onto you. It was the undeniable proof you weren't made for relationships at all; it was like Joel Miller had casted a spell, or worse, a curse on you: it had become impossible for you to be in a relationship. Still, that wasn't your main concern, not more than why you had to move back to Austin after all those years shifting from New York to Boston, Texas and even a brief period in Spain which led you into an affair with another guy named Javier, but well, that was definitely another story. You'd simply got a phone call from your parents talking about a family emergency and once you had asked for a leave, your boss had mentioned the opportunity of you working for the Austin branch, it was a promising one, with a lot of chances of career growth and becoming the head of the office would actually come in handy, so you had no other option than say yes and pack your stuff. When you got back to Texas, despite the suffocating heat, you were also welcomed with suffocating news of your grandmother's passing, and a couple of weeks later, the news she'd left you a house in the suburbs, a real good area with many families, easy traffic and a lot of space. Having become an apartment person over the years, you first thought it was so odd to live in a house, especially by yourself. Everything seemed so big but now you didn't have to worry about having to clean it all, being able to afford someone to do so, you found your way by decorating everything exactly the way you liked it, using the spare rooms to build your home office, your closet space and a guest room, you slowly turned grandma's house into your own. However, the exterior still bothered you: there was a great space in the backyard, but the swimming pool was empty and dirty, and you could definitely have a barbecue area built so you could welcome your friends and family on weekends. As it wasn't your priority, you didn't bother so much about it, turning your attention to settling into your new office first.
•••
"Oh, hi ma'am, I'm selling cookies to help our school fund, would you be interested?" Sarah displayed a wide grin, hoping that would soften up the very annoyed looking old woman who opened the door. She noticed how the old lady looked at her up and down and just groaned a 'no' before practically slamming the door shut. Sarah sighed and shook her head, and there she was thinking the people who lived in the wealthier part of the neighborhood were more generous, but apparently they were just a bunch of snobbish cunts. Her stomach growled in hunger as she walked some more, she knew she should've eaten before going to sell the cookies, but she didn't have time at that moment. She insisted some more, knocking on another door, having no clue she was actually knocking on her father's ex-wife's door.
Sighing tiredly as you closed your laptop, you looked around and focused on what you would do next. You knew you needed to go grocery shopping soon, but you just didn't feel like driving to the store and pick up vegetables, so instead, you left your study and went to the living room, getting comfortable on the couch and groaning slightly the moment the doorbell rang. You were just so comfortable on the couch, you considered ignoring whoever was on the other side of the door, but for some reason, a slight wave of guilt made its presence and you obliged to answer whoever was disturbing you.
"Hello! My name's Sarah Miller and we're selling cookies for the school fund, would you be interested?" The smiley girl repeated her memorized speech the moment you open the door, she discreetly watched you, seeing you didn't seem so closed like the woman from the previous house, but still she wasn't sure if you were friendly, not when you stared at her with a seemingly shocked look.
Miller.
Her name was Miller.
Your heart raced and lost track of what she was saying, knowing you desperately needed to get your shit back together; Miller wasn't an uncommon name at all, quite the opposite, you had met a few people who also coincidentally had the same last name as your ex-husband, so your reaction to the girl's name was just absurd. Maybe it was because you were back in Austin, where everything happened, but then again, you reminded yourself Joel wasn't the only person named Miller in Texas.
"I-I'm sorry… I got distracted but yeah, I'll take two boxes" you smiled at the girl, she was a teenager, a very pretty one, she was pretty good at expressing herself though she looked exhausted and sweaty.
"Would you like to drink some water?" You offered her, feeling sorry for her at the realization she had probably been walking under the sunlight for quite some time. Sarah didn't think twice before nodding eagerly as she stepped inside, dragging her school bag and her cookie cart along. You let her in, finding sweet how she looked all over the place, taking in the different details from your home and enjoying that environment.
You guided her to the kitchen, getting her a tall glass of iced water, frowning at the fact she wasn't following you anymore. Instead, she stood in front of your bookshelf, looking at it up and down, trying to take in as many titles as she could. Sarah would love to have her own bookshelf like that, she loved reading ever since she was a little girl and though she used the school's library a lot, she thought the idea of having her own things was appealing, but she understood her dad couldn't simply splurge on books for her whenever she wanted to.
"Do you like books?" You asked her, walking closer and handing her the glass of water, which she killed with only a few gulps.
"Have you read all of them?!" Her surprised voice made you chuckle, she was such a sweet girl, you had no idea why you instantly liked her, but you did.
"Well, not all of them… I've just bought some of them and I haven't had the time yet, why? Did any of them interest you?"
"Well…" she said shyly and hesitantly ran her fingers through them, only pulling one out to read the description at your encouraging nod. "This one seems nice…"
"It is nice… do you want it? You can take it!" You smiled at how she blinked a little confused but nodded, so thankful for your kindness. Even if she didn't know you, Sarah already liked you. She smiled at the book and placed the glass down.
"Have you had lunch?" She shook her head shyly and you smiled "come on, I'll make you a sandwich…"
For the next hour, you and Sarah talked about several things: she told you about her school, her interests and how much she loved reading. She had assured you she would return you the book as soon as she finished it and you assured her she could borrow as many as she would like. She also briefly talked about her family, mentioning she lived with her dad on the other side of the neighborhood and you told her a little bit more about yourself.
She widened her eyes the moment she saw what time it really was, and quickly grabbed her backpack and the book you'd lent her, thank you several times as she walked towards the door "go before your mom gets worried about you" you told her without much thinking, but she shrugged "mom's not around… I live with my dad only, but it was really nice meeting you, Y/N"
•••
And for the next month, at least once a week you'd get a visit from Sarah. It had become a habit of hers to just stop by, spend a couple of hours with you, return you the book she'd borrowed the week before and get a new one. She didn't talk much about her family, it was mostly about school, friends and boy crushes and books. You were kind of suspicious she was missing a feminine figure, since she briefly told you her mom left a couple of months after she was born without looking back, you picked up the hint she wasn't open to talk about it yet, and you respected it. You were glad you unexpectedly got a new friend, a very young friend, and at first you thought it was kind of odd, until you realized she sort of resembled a daughter figure to you. After all, if you had had children with Joel, your child would be around Sarah's age.
Joel also thought it was kind of weird his daughter made an adult friend, he was well aware of how dangerous things were in the world, especially for young, innocent girls like Sarah, but when she told him her new friend was a woman, single, childless woman, who was nice, definitely had some money but also seemed quite lonely, he assumed she was one of those old cat lady kind of women; in his mind, his daughter's mysterious friend was probably a widow, who didn't have any kids and now had to approach random people for attention so she wouldn't be alone all the time. If only he knew how wrong he was, he would've asked your name, but he didn't. And he also knew he should've done it, perhaps even asked for your phone number so he could call you in case of god forbid, an emergency. But he worked so hard, not only that, he was going through a very stressful period too, so he didn't pay as much attention as he should have towards several things.
Sarah had become acquainted with several aspects of your life, from the time you spent together in your weird version of a book club. Mostly the conversations were about her and the struggles she often faced as a teenager, but sometimes you let out information, plans or complaints here and there. It wasn't different the day you were very displeased with how your backyard was looking; it had potential to be a beautiful place but it needed fixing and remodeling. Perhaps it'd been the stress at work, but for whatever reason the way that place looked was bothering you and making you cranky, if any other given day you wouldn't give a crap about it, but at that moment you did, and not only that, you mentioned it to Sarah, who tried to be useful and told you she could ask her dad to take a look at it, after all, he was in the business and could help you with it. You said yes and told her you'd be expecting the two of them on Saturday morning. Only when the girl had left happily carrying another book in hands, was that you realized that maybe, and just maybe, you should've asked her father's name.
•••
"So, you're really sure this friend of yours wants to get some stuff remodeled? And that she can afford it?" Joel glanced at Sarah before focusing again on the street as he drove to her new friend's house. He wasn't truly convinced you would actually want to hire his services, it just seemed too good to be true. He held back a smile at the way Sarah rolled her eyes at him, she'd told him hundreds of times that yes, you needed someone to repair and remodel the backyard, if anything, he could at least indicate you someone who could provide the service you were looking for.
"Fine, let's help the old lady then" he grunted at the same time his daughter turned to him "what old lady?!"
"Your friend… isn't she old? I mean, she's lonely and she lets you hang out… I thought she'd be like our neighbor an-"
"Dad, she's younger than you, I think! And she's pretty too…"
At that information Joel was more curious about you. Why was a pretty young woman all alone and willing to be friends with a girl who could roughly be her kid's age?! Were you really pretty? And did you really want your backyard remodeled or was Sarah playing matchmaker? He really hoped she wasn't, otherwise he would be very angry. Joel didn't need a new relationship, he didn't want to, having failed the two major ones he had in his life, the first one being so immature and cruel to his sweet young wife and the second one he didn't exactly where he screwed up, perhaps he had just been naive and thought the woman who wanted nothing more than just some fun was actually willing to build a life with, or maybe he wanted her to take over your place, after all, you'd set the bar pretty high for Angela when it came on being a dedicated housewife. The raw fact was that Joel was alone all those years later, his first wife was hopefully living her best years with someone who truly deserved her and Angela was God knows where but he didn't give a single fuck. She'd been dead to him from the moment she walked out of his door, denying her own baby, and all that passion he felt turned into hurt and anger. Unlike the feelings he had for you: as the years passed and he grew older, he thought of several times he could've treated you better than he did, he thought of how he would have tried not hurting you as much as he did, even if the situation the two of you were was tricky, he often fantasized about a version of your marriage where he hadn't ruined everything, where he had been honest without being cruel, without playing with your feelings, he didn't know if it was just his conscious weighing heavily on him or what, but he always thought of you with affection and love. At that time he was sure he didn't love you anymore, the passion he felt for the other woman was too intense, too much, it blinded and deafened him from everything around, everything that mattered the most to him at the time. But all those years later, Joel was sure the love for you was still there, perhaps it was just hidden away, or it got stuck under all that shit that went on, still, he didn't know who you had become, what you looked like or where you were at that moment, so it was a fairly assumption he was still in love with a memory and nothing more than that.
"Fine, so what's her name after all?" He questioned his daughter after some moment of silence but before she could answer, Joel parked his truck in front of your home.
You heard the engine and you went to the window, checking the unknown car parked in front of your place and though you couldn't actually see them inside, you knew it was Sarah and her dad. Just as you went to the door, he exited the car, his back to the entrance as you walked to them and greeted Sarah, at the sound of your voice he immediately turned around and the two of you froze in time as you watched each other there.
Joel.
You felt as if you were trapped in a weird dream, the ones you know you are just dreaming and yet you can't move or speak, just taking the role of the audience of a bizarre picture that formed before your eyes. Joel on the other hand, stared at you in complete silence, you couldn't really read him, it was impossible to know what was going on in his mind, in his heart, you could just feel his eyes roaming over your body, taking all the image of you as if he was trying to make sure you were actually what he saw in front of him. He couldn't believe it, after all those years, after everything he did to you, you were there, beautiful as you'd always been, even more so, the fancy lifestyle really suited you, he could tell by your clothes, your nails perfectly done, your hair looking gorgeous and styled nicely, you had succeeded, you had had a life he knew he could never provide you, and for that he felt kind of relieved, at least one good thing came out of your divorce: the chance of you having the success you deserved it, you weren't that housewife who needed to still work part time at the mall, you were above that now, and Joel was so damn proud of you for it.
"I-I.. yo-"
"Nice to meet you, you must be Sarah's dad" you interrupted him before he could say your name and extended your hand to him, pretending you'd just met. He was confused but you tilted your head very discreetly towards his daughter, being sure she didn't know anything that had happened between the both of you. He immediately picked up the hint and introduced himself, as if you were meeting for the first time. His hand engulfed yours like it always did, Joel Miller had always had big and strong hands, surely they got calloused through the years, but you knew damn well what they were capable of doing to you. He was older, looking more handsome than you thought he would, he aged like a fine wine, streaks of silver here and there but the majority of his hair still dark and soft like always, he was bigger too, he was stronger, broad and grew several muscles, all of it a result of years of hard-working. No matter if he had broken your heart, there was no denying he was an extremely attractive man.
He appreciated how heartfelt you were towards his daughter and gladly followed you inside once you invited him into the backyard to discuss what could be done. Sarah was right behind the two of you, but you turned to her, smiling big
"I went to the bookstore yesterday and I think you might enjoy what I bought, wanna take a look at it? They're all in the living room" you suggested to her who nodded and happily went after the books.
Once you and Joel got into the backyard, he stuttered some apologies but you immediately cut him off.
"I don't want apologies Joel, I didn't know Sarah was your daughter and I probably wouldn't have let her in if I knew who she was, but now I got attached to her and I hope our situation isn't going to prevent us from being friends" you told him honestly and watched as he nodded
"You know, her mom, Angela, she left us and I'm very sorry I left you for her.. "
"I don't wanna hear it, Joel. As I said, I don't wanna hear it about her mom or the apologies or anything at all, I mean, Sarah told me what happened and it's enough, you and I aren't together anymore, we're better off without each other, so let's just overcome this part and focus on the job I need you to do…"
"You know, I can indicate you another contractor to do it for you, so it won't be weird…"
"No, you can do it, unless you are feeling uncomfortable but other than that, I'd rather you do it, besides, Sarah would find it awkward"
And like that, Joel got into his professional mood and the two of you discussed the project you had in mind, hiring his services, he told you he could start the next Monday and he would take care of it himself, to make sure things would go according to your wishes. He noticed you didn't wear any commitment rings, nor there were pictures of you and any guy indicating a relationship and in his heart, the hope of perhaps taking you out for a coffee and getting to know you, the woman you'd become after those years, after growing mature and changing your life completely, growing in his heart. It was a fair assumption Joel had an immediate crush on you, the feelings he held within, were now blossoming more, at how beautiful, intelligent and attractive you were and suddenly, the roles were reversed: if more than ten years ago you had it bad for him, now he was the one who felt like a sick love puppy towards you.
The first week of working wasn't so bad at all, Joel would arrive at yours earlier than you expected and would start working. You didn't stay around much, letting him do his job while you were probably working in the living room or any other part of the house whenever you didn't have to go to work per se. He tried making small talk during some of his breaks and since you didn't see any harm in it, you chatted briefly, that was how he'd learned what you did for a living, where you'd been after you left Austin, and stuff like that. He told you some things about his life, mostly about how it'd been the experience of raising a child on his own, but whenever he got near bringing up your past or trying to apologize, you'd cut up any kind of interaction with him. At the end of the day you and him had nothing but a professional relationship. He understood your reasons, and yet, he hoped you would find at least a small breach in your heart to let him in, he really hoped he could show you he was a better man now, that he could be suitable for you, and yet, you kept yourself all the way distant and protecting yourself from him.
So it became a very common scene to always escape from Joel, moving seats or rooms whenever he was around, you didn't know how else to act, what he expected from you. It wasn't like you were old buddies catching up after years in a long-distance relationship. And he always got displeased.
It was about the third week of working at your house, he asked if he could use your kitchen to have lunch, heating up the food he'd eat, you smiled at yourself as you were taken back by the memories of times where you would prepare him lunches and send it in his lunchbox, how you would worry about him being hungry so you would always make sure there was something fresh out of the oven for him to nibble on as soon as he got home from work and chuckled softly, shaking your head and excusing yourself. He'd thought you would at least have lunch next to him, but you weren't willing to do that at all, and that both pained and pissed him off.
"Would it kill you to spend time with me? Look at me? Or act like a human being instead of being all stiff like a robot whenever I'm around?" He asked, breaking the silence, you could see he was frustrated and that puzzled you to no end.
"What are you talking about, Joel?!"
"You don't talk to me, Y/N, I try making small talk, you don't answer me, you don't even look at me, suddenly I'm not worth your time? You're too good to even acknowledge I am next to you?"
"Do you really want to talk about not being worth someone's time? Really Joel? I thought you had grown up during all these years but I can see you are just the same shallow fuckboy who gets pissed off when you see I'm not crawling towards you…"
"Stop being unfair to me! All I'm trying to do is to show you I've changed, I am a better man, a better person, I'm not that same immature Joel you met so many years ago, I'm trying to make you see I'm a new man…" he went from angry to desperate, you took a step closer and looked into his eyes, not breaking the eye contact for one second.
"I know Joel, I know you've changed… you've grown into this hardworking man, this amazing father, I can see it, I hear it every time Sarah comes over, but you don't have to try too hard, it's not gonna change anything… You and I are two different people, we have nothing to do with each other anymore"
"You can't say that, I want you to see we could try it again, I still love you, Y/N!"
"Joel, we'll never try it again, the marks of your betrayal still linger here, all over me, forgetting you was the hardest thing I've ever done, and I don't want to ever feel it again. You don't love me, Joel. You love the idea of me, of picking up the shattered parts of your broken life and making it right, you love the thought of building up a family, of giving your daughter the mom she deserves, and it's all because it didn't work out with that woman. We both know it… if she hadn't left you wouldn't even be thinking of me" you looked down, trying to hold back a tear that insisted on falling, but failing at that matter. "I wasn't good enough to be by your side, to build a family with you, you can't just expect me to throw myself into your arms as if nothing had happened, what exactly do you think would happen between us in the first place? I'd be waiting for you every single night with dinner ready? Those days were over, Joel…" you sniffed and he sighed, placing his hand on his waist.
"Give me a chance, go on a date with me, please… before you say no, just think about it, of what we could have together… please! You don't have to answer me now, think about it and when I finish the job, you can tell me your answer"
•••
The following weeks were as normal as they could be; you hadn't told Joel yes but you hadn't told him no either and even if it pained you to admit it, you sometimes thought of his proposition. Sarah was still coming over, your bond was now stronger, you really liked each other and despite everything that happened, you were thankful Joel wasn't against your friendship. You two had agreed on not telling her anything about your shared past at the moment, but in case you two decided she needed to know it for whatever reason, Joel would be the one to tell her, it would only make sense. You also thought about his words and you decided to be nicer to him, actually stopping to talk to him, or having lunch next to him instead of rushing away as fast as you could and in retribution, he stopped with the feelings talk. The deadline was coming to an end, as your backyard remodeling was getting prettier and prettier each passing day. It was odd and awkward and you wanted to get things over with as soon as possible at the same time a strange fascination with watching Joel caught you. It was hard to explain, but when the final day came, when Joel and his assistant showed you the word ready and done, and after you paid them the large wage you owed them for the services, your ex-husband asked to talk to you. He had hope in his eyes, he was wearing his flannel, and he'd combed his hair a little, which made him look painfully handsome, your heart clenched. Even before he could say anything, you already had your answer. He stood in front of you, baffled at the fact you threw your arms around his body, pulling him for a hug. His hands locked around your waist, strong grip not wanting to let go, while you sank into his warmth. He was your old Joel, the one you'd loved so deeply and broke your heart, but nonetheless your Joel.
Taking your hand to his face, you stroked it gently, feeling his beard scratching your palm a little and you smiled "I forgive you, Joel… I don't know if you wanted my forgiveness or not, but I forgive you anyway, I don't resent you anymore, what's gone, it's gone and now we can only focus on our future. I know that if I tried looking for a space in my heart, I would find it a part that still keeps all the love I felt for you, but we've changed, for the best and that teaches us we should never make the same mistakes from the past, so you do understand why we can't go on this date, right? We can't be together, I'm sorry Joel, but you know it's true… I just need one last thing from you…"
You told him, leaning towards him and pecking his lips. After all that time, it still felt like your favorite place in the world, your heart raced the moment he groaned into your mouth and his hands tightened his dominating grip on you. It was quite pathetic how he still had the same effect over you and if he hadn't hurt you as much as he did and condemned you two to a relationship based on lack of trust, perhaps you could even consider trying again. Forgiving and forgetting were different things, whereas you didn't resent him anymore, you hadn't forgotten about how broken he left your heart. You would never be able to trust him again, always worrying he had found someone better like he did once, you couldn't do that to yourself, you loved yourself too much to go back to Joel Miller. That last kiss you cherished, you would keep it in your memories, but it wouldn't go further than that. You and Joel were done for years and nothing would convince you otherwise.
____
A/N: I hope you enjoyed it 😭💔
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luna-lovegreat · 5 months
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Twilight and Legends relationship
...I love it
**in this post there's a lot of stuff I didn't notice before. I'm gonna resist the urge to write an essay on each point, and attempt to leave most of it up to the reader's interpretation**
Ok ok there's a ton of stuff here, starting with early character scenes
They're like the rest of the chain: They fight together and talk. Legend is close to Hyrule, and Twilight to Wild and Time.
We see some things Twilight and Legend have in common. One is their dislike of Hyrule knights, and-
As seen in the Gerudo clothes scene, both Twi and Leg like to mess around with pranks and have a lot of snark... wonder what would happen if they worked together
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But there's something really important about how Twilight views Legend:
I wasn't aware this was before looking closely at their interactions but... Twilight didn't originally like Legend. This is shown a lot later on- in his facial expressions and words towards Legend. But from the start he didn't like him much, and here's why:
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From the start, Jojo says this- Twilight judges Legend's actions as too harsh since his mannerisms come across as picking on someone. (Also Sky you are so so pure and cute 10/10 most huggable Link)
Legend is abrasive because he's had so many adventures- he's hardened to the point of being sharp. But it's wonderful that that character can still be so loved- his heart is good (hero duh)
Twilight has always been a big brother. It makes him well loved (rightly so). Jojo says he knows people can change- for good or bad. But because of his past Twilight doesn't like people picking on others "not even a little". It's complicated- we see it affect Twilight's attitude towards Legend a lot.
Anywho moving on to the plot
Wolfie, Aka twilight
Dark mirror stuff happens, and Legend finds out Twi's Wolfie- as we all know. But he can't just. Acknowledge it of course. He's gotta probe and tease, asking pointed questions (snark snark snark)
And in his attempts to be certain about the Wolf stuff, we were blessed with:
Bunny Legend
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Welp. That investigation did not go as planned.
Animal forms:
Bunnies are soft, but Legends actions are not. He is guarded and sharp yet his form shows how sweet his true heart is
Wolves will love/protect their family yet are fierce, they have fangs and will fight. The root of who Twilight is is his kindness and family
Also (sarcastic) good job to Four and Wild for being SO SUBTLE with their emotions when Legend's asking questions hinting he knows Twi's secret
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Legend: asking questions about the secret shhh
Four and Wild: Are having a freaking heart attack about it
Twilight: starts ranting about goats
...
Once Twilight gets over the shock of Legend like. Absorbing his crystal. He... well, looking at the harshness in his face and words, this is where Legend's attitude and his past with Colin being bullied biased him against Legend.
Look at his face in each panel through the progression- Twilight is more and more confused thinking legend is not who he thought he was...
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And Twilight certainly sympathizes/relates to being hurt by losing someone he loved (in whatever form the relationship took)
And WHY is it always girlfriend trauma with these boys of COURSE it's girlfriend trauma that brings them together NOT SHARING A SPIRIT AND LOVE OF SWINGING GLORIFIED METAL NO THEY HAVE TO BOND OVER RELATIONSHIPS GONE WRONG
Twilight then thinks well that's a good reason to be pretty changed because from the start Jojo said he'll always understand people changing...
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So they go, and make legend human again (with pink hair) and Legend is... surprised. And grateful...
Another few defining moments:
Legend's dialogue thanking him is the real start of them connecting like in Leg's original character description "the most reliable, you want him on your team"
And again Twi's face, Twilight is looking at Leg differently throughout this- contemplating to be honest. Considering...
And remember when I said these two both like to prank? Well the second they have a shared experience and get back to camp they immediately team up and start barraging Warriors with snark
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Heaven help the chain when these two are on the same side
Legend has never been close to people outside of the few he's accepted as his (love him and hyrule's bond). After this? Twilight's one of his people. There's much more expression of caring and closeness towards Twilight- something we don't see with many.
And then, well, Twilight nearly dies. And Legend, he cares
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Bunny boys puppy dog eyes are gonna kill me someday
Twilights pretty injured, he really doesn't see/remember all these moments showing how much Legend wants to help
And then we have this moment
this moment
Matters so so much
Look at Twi's face. Look at his surprise, realization, and acceptance- this is when he realizes- when he sees how much Legend cares for him
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Twi woke from his deathbed for his family
and then in the next few updates it's really cute- he just is barely recovering and legend is just... beside him. Staying by his side
Animal forms later development:
Legend's bunny form is soft- but he is still not totally soft. Looking at Legends actions and facial expressions towards the others, while he's definitely closer to Twi now, he's still the snarky boy we know and love.
Twilight's Wolf form is loyal and loves family: Once he knows legends heart? Full on pack love.
And WHY were they so very intent on petting each other
Legend: I'm gonna go try and pet the wolf since I think he's my dude yes good plan
Twilight: I KNOW THIS IS WEIRD BUT IVE NEVER PET A RABBIT BEFORE LET ME TOUCH YOU
...
Here's a few random parallels of them to chew on because I love parallels (them snarky snarking each other, then some brother love parallels)
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The thing with these two is their character bonding and whatever is not all sweet and lovey like some of the others. They have some REALLY sweet caring moments with each other. But snark plus snark equals double snark, meaning them together is the weirdest mix of kindness and teasing you've ever seen
And although at the beginning they were pretty harsh towards each other, it makes their getting closer and learning their similarities all the better.
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thisonehere · 6 months
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The webs we weave
You are the weaver, once a mere mortal(???) who centuries ago challenged Liu Kang to a weaving competition. The loser had to grant a request from the winner. Spoiler alert: you won. Your request: Immortality and eternal youth and beauty. The usual. Nowadays you are known across the realms for your work... among other things.
Shang Tsung, Kung Lao, Johnny Cage, Bi-Han, Kuai Liang, Kitana, Mileena, & Liu Kang
A/N: Serious intros mixed with flirting and just the right amount of almost-smut. Be sure to send any other ideas you might have.
Shang Tsung
Y/n: Does my skill flatter you, sorcerer?
Shang Tsung: It amuses, maybe I'll let you live after all.
Shang Tsung: I must say, now that I see your work in person. It's quite... mediocre.
Y/n: Mediocre? MEDIOCRE?
Shang Tsung: That Liu Kang lost to you speaks volumes.
Y/n: I can say the same about you losing to him.
Y/n: You're... you're very charming for a villain.
Shang Tsung: Do I make you weak in the knees, Y/n?
Shang Tsung: That silk coat you made me had acidic venom in the fibers!
Y/n: *grins* Oops.
Y/n: The silk sheets have been crafted as you requested.
Shang Tsung: Excellent, now I just need you on them to make it complete.
Kung Lao
Kung Lao: I need a new costume, something that matches my greatness.
Y/n: Of course, I think I have some leftover pieces of scrap from Raiden.
Kung Lao: You know what, I like you.
Y/n: *rolls eyes* Wow, thank you so much. Your validating me makes me feel so special.
Y/n: What would you like me to make you?
Kung Lao: A nice, big, soft cover. We'll need it for our honeymoon.
Kung Lao: Why do you have so many spiders?
Y/n: I like having company as I spin my threads.
Y/n: Keep you and your hat out of my workshop!
Kung Lao: Oh come on, all I did was accidentally cut some of the work that took you years to complete.
Kung Lao: You should come with me to Madam Bo's.
Y/n: NO. My tab with her is big enough.
Johnny Cage
Johnny: If I knew spiders could be so hot, I'd still smash them all day.
Y/n: I'll never forgive you for killing Gunter!
Johnny: I've got this sweet idea for a new look.
Y/n: Of course, but I'll need your measurements... I need you to get naked, Johnny.
Johnny: Just so you know, I'm cool with doing nudity.
Y/n: Johnny, I'm a weaver, not a sculptor.
Johnny: You got to become my costume designer, we'd kill it on the red carpet.
Y/n: That would be a dream, Johnny!
Johnny: Y/n..that's such a beautiful name. It almost makes me want to sing.
Y/n: Please don't, your musical flopped for a reason.
Johnny: I don't think Christina will ever come back.
Y/n: Remember Johnny, I'll be here for you...With open arms, open legs, and an open mouth.
Bi-Han
Y/n: I'll make nothing for you!
Bi-Han: Good, I want you, not your talents.
Bi-Han: You are living proof of Liu Kang's incompetence.
Y/n: Says the man who lost to two farmers.
Bi-Han: I was holding back against Raiden and Kung Lao.
Y/n: Oh, Bi-Han, you don't need to lie to impress me.
Bi-Han: I'll freeze your little insects and leave you defenseless.
Y/n: A. They're Arachnida, B. Pick up a book, and C. Some of us like the cold.
Y/n: Your bed must be so cold.
Bi-Han: Come lay in it with me and find out.
Bi-Han: Let me guess, you think your love can "fix me"?
Y/n: Who said I wanted to fix you?
Kuai Liang
Kuai Liang: Your growing relationship with Bi-Han is concerning.
Y/n: Oh Kuai, don't tell me you're getting jealous.
Y/n: Come to me, Scorpion. I burn for you.
Kuai Liang: You've been spending too much time with Johnny.
Y/n: Perhaps you and I coul-
Kuai Liang: I'm sorry, but I'm spoken for.
Kuai Liang: Harumi loved the tapestry.
Y/n: Only the best for her.
Y/n: Are sure?
Kuai Liang: The feeling I had for you are gone now.
Kuai Liang: What have you been planning?
Y/n: Just a little present for your wedding, specifically for the honeymoon.
Kitana
Kitana: Can I hope to have your loyalty in my ongoing battle with Shao?
Y/n: I guess we both shall see.
Kitana: You beat Lord Liu Kang!?
Y/n: Of course, when it comes to combat he is my superior, but no man can best me in my craft.
Kitana: I must say, the stories about you do not do your talents or your beauty justice.
Y/n: What exactly do those stories say?
Kitana: Have you ever considered silk worms rather than spiders?
Y/n: *blech* Never, they're gross, slow, and squishy, and worse, they're all gossips.
Y/n: I already have the train ready, just needs some more embroidery.
Titan Kitana: Train? Are you making me a wedding dress?
Y/n: You and Liu Kang are so cute together.
Titan Kitana: I thank you for being so approving, but our relationship is really none of your business.
Mileena
Y/n: Why do you stare, Empress?
Mileena: I don't know, something about all those bugs around you seems...familiar...
Mileena: Your ascension to the plain of the immortals is most admirable.
Y/n: Perhaps there are some things I may be able to teach you Empress.
Mileena: Are you making wedding attire for Titan Kitana and Lord Liu Kang?
Y/n: Of course, but don't be jealous, I already have something special for you and Tanya.
Mileena: Perhaps you may stay a bit longer, teach me some of your trade.
Y/n: Of course, Empress.
Mileena: *Bloodlusted* I will rip your tongue out from through your cheek!
Y/n: Ooohhhh, cheeky.
Mileena: When I am done with you I will burn all your work to ashes for what you did!
Y/n: No, please! Mercy, MERCY!!!
Liu Kang
Y/n: You knew I'd win?
Liu Kang: I can recognize talent when I see it.
Y/n: Why did you accept my challenge even though you knew you'd lose?
Liu Kang: I was hoping for a chance to be near you.
Y/n: Who is this D'vorrah? Geras said I reminded him of her.
Liu Kang: Nothing should concern you.
Liu Kang: Please, I ask you, keep your distance from raiden.
Y/n: Why? Worried that I'll tempt your little champion?
Liu Kang: You made me a wedding dress?
Y/n: Of course, I see you as much more of a dress-wearing type of man rather than a boring old tuxedo.
Liu Kang: Be careful, Y/n, your hubris can lead to your downfall.
Y/n: What is wrong with showing a little pride in my work?
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eitaababe · 1 year
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KISS IT BETTER !
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ao'nung x metkayina reader.
a/n — sorry guys it's been a reallyyy rough past few days some shit has gone down but here's a lil drabble while i finish a fic 🫶 / also they're like 18 in this for sake of plot !
To say you and Ao'nung didn't get along would be an understatement.
You two always argued, no matter how little or how big. From the way your hair was done, to who couldn't hold their breath as long, who was better on an ilu, you name it.
Though, despite you not being able to see eye to eye with him, you were always close with his younger sister. You were attached to the hip ever since children, and you spent practically your whole lives with each other, pretty much growing up together. You also grew close with her family, spending many dinners over at her marui.
So of course, you always had to see her brother.
Tsireya wasn't blind. Pretty much anyone could see the way you two acted around each other. And if they couldn't see it, they could certainly hear it. There wasn't a minute you could be in the same vicinity as each other and not throw insults at each other.
However, nobody really knows how or why you're like that. It's almost as if you were born into the world and just decided to hate each other.
And so you're sitting in between Tsireya's legs, her doing a new hairstyle for your hair and you whining about her brother once more. "I just don't get it," you complained, huffing in annoyance. "He really thinks he can insult me with a face like that! 'You'll never be able to get a boyfriend looking like that, y/n'," you gruffly mimicked, inaccurately impersonating his voice. "As if he's any better! Like you're the one who can't keep a girlfriend. He's projecting, I'm telling you."
Pulling extra tight on a certain braid you yelped, glaring over your shoulder. "Y/n, you seriously have a problem," Tsireya stated, sighing. "I mean if you really hate my brother so much, just don't talk to him. You both are around each other a lot for people who claim to hate each other so much."
"It's not my fault!" You quickly replied. "I swear, he's everywhere. I want to go clear my mind and go for a swim? He's already there. I want to feed the ilus? Apparently he was planning on going on a ride. I want to stop by and have dinner with my best friend? He-"
"Lives there, Y/n. He lives there," Tsireya finished for you. "I'm just saying. He may be my brother, but if he pisses you off that much you don't have to talk to him. He's good at riling people up. Especially you." She commented, finishing your hair and patting your shoulder lightly for you to turn around.
"He could piss anyone off with the things he says," You grumbled, shoulders drooping when you fell under Tsireya's disapproving gaze. "Fine. I'll try to not let him get to me. Starting now."
"Oh that's lovely, because he's right behind you."
"What-"
"Hi sister," he paused, eyes glancing to you in distaste. "Y/n."
"Ao'nung." You acknowledged him blandly, trying to take your friend's advice and not be disturbed by his mere presence.
"Mother wants you home for dinner," He continued, letting out a sigh before going on. "They invited you too." He finished, not sparring a glance your way before turning around and walking back.
"That went better than expected." Tsireya grinned, grabbing your arm and taking you to her own marui.
"Wait until dinner."
Dinner was going better than expected. You and Ao'nung hadn't argued yet, considering you chose to ignore him and he did the same. Your parents had joined the dinner as well, so you had no other choice but to be respectful.
Your calm nature soon disappeared as you heard the words coming from your parents mouths.
"What?" You exclaimed in disbelief, Tsireya sitting next to you with a shocked expression.
"Really, we think it's for the best."
"No offense or anything, but have you met Ao'nung? I can barely stay in the same room with him, nevertheless spend the rest of my life with him!" You complained, ignoring the stern looks from your parents. "It won't work. Me and Ao'nung, we don't work well together."
"For once, I agree." The boy finally spoke, not looking up from the table.
"Y/n, Ao'nung, I know this is unexpected, but we've all talked about it. You would make a great mate for Ao'nung. We'd like you two to be mated soon before Ao'nung chooses a girl us or the clan would not approve of."
You noticed how his jaw clenched at the comment, yet he stayed silent. You closed your eyes, trying to accept your fate. When you both fell silent, everyone got up and started to exit the room. "We'll give you two some privacy."
You watched as they all left out the marui, turning towards the male. "Why didn't you say anything?"
"It's my mother, I doubt anything I would've said would have made a difference."
"Of course it would! You're her son!"
"You're just so stubborn, aren't you?" Ao'nung suddenly shouted, standing up now. "Thinking you can have everything your way? We have duties, y/n. Grow up."
"Clearly, I'm the only one who's thinking rationally right now! How can you be willing to spend the rest of your life with someone you can't stand?"
"Well like it or not, it's happening. Deal with it, because you're not going to change our parents' minds."
"I can't believe you," you scoffed. "I hope they don't expect me to love you. I can't see who would." You walked out furiously, stomping back towards your own marui.
"Oh, you're one to talk!"
The next few days you two kept your separate ways, but both of you knew your parents wouldn't let it stay like that. They'd practically set up a date for you guys, claiming it's so you could 'settle the feud'.
So you woke up, already in a bad mood, putting minimal effort into getting ready. You headed outside your marui, grumbling what sounded like a farewell to your parents, blood boiling at the sight of the boy who was waiting for you on the beach.
"Y/n." He gruffly greeted you, not meeting your eye.
"Ao'nung." You acknowledged him back, mind drifting back to the other night. Were you too harsh with your words? It was possible you could've gotten caught up in the heat of the moment, and if you were forced to spent the rest of your life with him, you should at least try to be civil.
"...how are you?" You inwardly cringed at yourself, making an awkward attempt to make conversation.
He sent a questioning look your way, realizing what you were doing. He almost wanted to laugh at how out of place you looked. He decided to play along, for whatever reason. "Okay. You?"
"I'm good."
The both of you didn't talk much for the rest of the day, but you didn't argue either, so maybe you were showing signs of improvement. You walked along the beach quietly, the occasional tight-lipped smile, or a hum in response to one of your or his attempts to make some small talk.
Your hangouts usually went like that, you'd greet each other and walk, tension so thick you could cut it with a knife. You were too scared to say anything about it, or change the newly made routine, until Ao'nung seemingly had enough.
"Y/n," he sighed out tiredly, stopping and turning to face you fully. "This isn't helping us at all. All we're trying to do is not argue every time we're around each other. We're not fixing anything, hell, we're probably making it worse. Even if we can't love each other, shouldn't we be able to get to know one another?"
You stood silent for a moment, considering his offer. "I hate it when you're right," you deadpanned, dropping the 'nice' act. "It's just so irregular. Why would I want to be stuck with you?"
"Cmon, I struck peace and you're insulting me?" He teased, flashing a rare grin to you.
"Stop smiling, people are gonna start thinking you want to be around me." You told him, walking off.
Ao'nung went after you, chuckling to himself. "I won't make it a habit then!"
To everyone's surprise, you were finally starting to get along. You acted like friends, even if neither of you would necessarily admit it. You were spending your time with Tsireya, deeming you'd spent too much time with her brother.
"I can't believe I actually saw you smiling in the vicinity of Ao'nung." She teased, laughing once you rolled your eyes.
"Oh shut up. We're basically going to be with each other for eternity, we had to stop hating each other at some point."
"He was talking about you the other day at dinner, actually. If I didn't know any better I'd say he's taken a liking to you."
"Absolutely not!" You denied, shaking your head. "We're not like that. Like at all. We're just friends now, okay? We don't see each other that way."
"Whatever you say."
What the two of you didn't notice, however, was that the boy heard the two of you talking, heart slightly sinking. Could you really not tell how he felt?
And oddly enough, he felt even more determined to prove how he did.
To your shock, Ao'nung started making advances towards you during your scheduled hang outs. They were subtle, but you noticed the slight flirting, or how his touch would linger on you longer than usual.
You didn't think much of it however, considering you just went from enemies to friends in the span of maybe two weeks. You were right to do so, when you spotted him with another girl one day.
When you first saw them, you really could've cared less. Ao'nung was popular, and knew many people. If he had friends who were girls, it didn't matter. Everyone knew you were each others promised mates, and the word quickly spread since people knew of your dislike for each other.
You trusted Ao'nung, he was not only your betrothed but your duties were to each other, and he wasn't dumb enough to try and change that.
At least you thought.
Their second interaction, you saw the same girl, Mau. She was a sweet girl, you knew her through Tsireya. You watched quietly from afar as the two talked animatedly, large smiles and their laughter heard from where you stood. You hid behind a smaller palm tree, it's leaves shielding you from their view.
You couldn't quite hear what their conversation was, so you settled for just watching. You were shocked when she pressed a kiss to his cheek, and how he turned purple in response. You denied how you felt your heart drop to your stomach, and deemed that their conversation should be private and hurried to leave.
In the midst of rushing out you accidentally walked right into one of the leaves, your lip getting cut in the process. "Oh, fuck." You cursed underneath your breath, hoping no one could see you leave. You sprinted away to another part of the beach, moving over to the marui near the ilus.
Ao'nung squinted his eyes at the sight of someone running away, thinking it oddly resembled you. A wave of adrenaline quickly hit him when he realized you might have seen Mau, and he jumped up in panic. "I'm so sorry, I have to go." He excused himself, rushing after you.
He found you with the ilus, smiling when he heard you talking nonsense to them. He cleared his throat, "You seriously have got to make some new friends."
You froze at his voice, almost turning around but realizing he'd see the wound on your lip. You stayed in place, back turned to him as you kept feeding the creatures. "Don't be salty I have more friends than you, even if they can't talk."
"In your dreams, hun," He teased, sitting down next to you, confused when you turned away from him. Concerned, and a little scared you saw his previous interaction, his head followed yours, trying to meet your eyes. "What's wrong?"
You pursed your lips, turning around and eyes widening when you realized how close his face was to yours. Afraid of talking and showing him your cut you only shrugged, shaking your head.
"Why are you holding your lips like that?" He questioned, making you hot with panic. "It makes you look even more stupid."
"Oh just shut up." You mumbled, figuring there was no way out of this. You lowered your head, but not before he could see your wound.
"What happened?"
You really just wanted to let the ocean swallow you whole.
"I ran into a tree."
"While eavesdropping?" He laughed, seeing the way your head quickly perked up, the caught look on your face.
"I didn't- I mean-"
"Oh don't worry, I know you were just questioning my loyalty. I mean with a face like this, there's loads of girls after me. Had to break many hearts knowing I was promised to you."
"Keep telling yourself that. And if I was testing your loyalty, you definitely failed. Not that I mind, but who lets other girls kiss them when they're promised to someone else?"
"If you're jealous, just say that," he simply shrugged, smirking at you. "I turned Mau down, by the way. Told her I was already to be mated with another."
"Oh," you couldn't help but let out a breath of relief. "Your parents will be happy to hear that."
Rolling his eyes at your ability to not take a hint, he only sighed. "Yeah, sure."
Ao'nung then refocused on your lips, looking at the cut. "You know, we should really do something about that."
"It doesn't hurt that much."
"You should let me kiss it better."
"What?" You exclaimed, looking at him incredulously.
"You heard me."
Not bothering to hear your response his lips pressed against yours gently, in fear of making the cut any worse. His hand came to rest against your jaw as his lips moved slowly. You felt him smile against you before he quickly pecked your lips again, pulling away with a smug look. "Feel any better?"
"I'm not sure, you might have to kiss it better again."
a/n — I FINALLY POSTED AGAIN. WRITERS BLOCK IS A BITCH.
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tumb1rprincess · 3 months
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Thoughts on episodes 7 and 8 of Hazbin Hotel
The fucking "ace in the hole" joke with Alastor, that was funny.
I want Rosie as my therapist. I can't believe a cannibal is one of the sweetest characters on the show.
So angel weapons are the only thing that can kill angels, okay. I knew that was a thing, but I wondering if maybe Carmilla did it some other way. Also, her instantly recognizing Vaggie as an angel made me laugh. Was that supposed to be a nod towards the fans for figuring that out ages ago?
More fucking bops, hell yeah. I think my favorite out of this bunch had to be Charlie and Vaggie's reprise of More Than Anything. So fucking cute!
I legit that Angel Dust was going to be like "So, if this is our last night, how about we fuck?" to Husker, but I guess their relationship is going to be more of a slow burn. That's fine with me.
Alastor and Nifty are so cute, they're fucking weirdo besties.
Sir Pentious my beloved, you were a good boy. I didn't expect him to be the one to go, but I also didn't expect him to end up in Heaven. Does this mean that Heaven will finally see that redemption is possible?
We finally saw Adam's face! It's kind of generic, but maybe that's the point? Also, I just now realized his robes are supposed to look like a sports varsity jacket.
This fight was bloody, man. Angels getting ripped apart, Lute ripping off part of her own body to get out from under that rubble, Adam getting the shit beat out of him.
Lucifer and Charlie finally showing their true demon forms and showing their real power was so satisfying. Glad they showed Adam what for, although Nifty killing him was hilarious.
Dude, Alastor got shook during this fight. He got hurt, he had to run, and whatever deal he's in is suffocating him. I wonder if his favor to ask of Charlie is her figuring out how to free him.
So Lilith is in Heaven. This raises so many questions. Why is she there? What is she planning? Does she have Alastor on a leash or does somebody else?
This also makes me question where the series will go from here. Heaven probably won't be doing exterminations anymore since they don't want to lose anymore angels. Will the main conflict next season be getting Heaven to recognize that redeeming sinners is possible? Will Heaven even let Charlie and the others know that Sir Pentious got there? Will Lilith be the big bad? What's Lute's next move now that she's in charge of the exterminators?
I guess me theorizing so much about season 2 shows how much I loved season 1. I'm so glad I got into this series, and this show has gone from a little Youtube pilot to a full fledged show with one season done another on the way. The only thing I hope is that season 2 will have more than eight episodes, I want more time with these characters and to see their development more. I want to see what happens next. God, what a show.
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myfeetrcolddd · 3 months
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Under the mistletoe
"And you're sure it'll only stop the two of them?" Draco asked, his eyes narrowed and skeptical of the curly haired Gryffindor.
"Yes, Malfoy, I'm sure." Hermione replied, annoyed at the Slytherin boys skeptics.
(✿◕‿◕✿)
Theodore Nott and Y/N L/N were completely oblivious and deep in denial. The amount of times the two gushed to their respective friends about something the other did was far too many.
It was obvious that they liked each other. Everyone knew, but them it seemed, and it was unbearable. Especially for their friends who couldn't take the constant talks about how much one liked the other but 'It would never happen because he's way out of my league.' or 'She deserves better than me.'
So Harry did the unspeakable, he went and talked to Draco. The two groups came up with a plan.
It was the holidays, Theo and Y/n were already practically a couple, doing things together that no normal friends would, all they weren't doing was kissing or shagging.
The two groups knew there was no way of really forcing them to confess, but if they could get the two to kiss then they'd have to confront the obvious attraction they felt for the other, and surely they wouldn't be able to deny the face that the other liked them.
It was nearly fool proof. The just had to find a way to execute it.
"Mistletoe!" Blaise shouted, grinning as he ran into the room of requirement, the official meeting place for operation Kiss, as Blaise suggested, though no one else wanted to call it that there was no other options.
"What're you on about." Ron said, frowning.
"Mistletoe!" Blaise repeated, still grinning like a madman as he held up the tiny bundle of mistletoe, showing it to everyone in the room.
"Yeah, we get it, mistletoe." Mattheo mocked, "What about it?"
"This," He waved the thing around in his friends face, "Is how we get them to kiss!"
"Mate..." Harry said slowly, "Hate to break it to you, but they've gone under mistletoe before, the completely ignore it. Like literally everyone else does."
"Yeah, I know that." Blaise says, annoyed by the lack of enthusiasm in the room, "But what if we found a way that forced them to not ignore it!" He waited for someone to interrupt him, to say it was a dumb idea, but when no one didn't he went on, "Hear me out, what if when they both walked under it it somehow kept them there! So that they wouldn't be able to leave that spot until they kissed!"
Everyone stared at him, confused but intrigued.
"And how would we do that?"
Blaise rolled his eyes, "Well I don't know." He sassed, "I came up with the idea, you all can figure out how to do it." He huffed as he dropped himself onto one of the many sofas in the room.
As if they were all thinking the same thing they all turned towards Hermione, who looked startled by the attention, "I don't know why you're all looking at me." She frowned.
"Well you're the smartest one here..." Enzo said and the girl pressed her lips into a thin line before she rolled her eyes.
"Well, there probably is a way it's possible, we'd have to modify a potion or maybe even a spell, especially since we don't want to trap others under the mistletoe, so we'd have to find a way to keep it person specific..." Hermione then rattled on about all the ways they could go about it and soon they had a plan.
It took a week for things to be ready.
(✿◕‿◕✿)
"Have your friends been acting weird lately?" Y/N asked Theo as they walked out of potions.
"More than usual actually." The boy replied and glanced down at the girl he was sure he wanted to marry.
"Same, and I swear I've seen Hermione talking with Draco so much this week."
"Maybe they're finally getting together." Theo smirked, "Salazar knows it's about time."
The girl laughed and shook her head, "Tell me about it. If they don't get together this year then I'm going to be out of ten galleons."
The pair went quiet for a moment and Y/N took the chance to look up at her best friend. He was beautiful, and quite possibly the love of her life. She had never planned on letting her feelings get this far.
It had only started as a small crush on a boy she was friendly with back in second year. But then they got closer, and the closer they got the harder she fell.
Now they're in their last year and she still hadn't confessed, she figured it was too late, and it was clear he didn't want anything other than friendship from her. He had had multiple girlfriends before, and none of them looked like her, they were quite the opposite actually.
Y/N was counting on losing feelings for him this year, it would be for the best.
As if he could feel her eyes on him Theo turned and looked at her, his green-blue eyes meeting hers. For a moment she felt her heart stop, she was lost in them and the swirling colors.
But then she shook her head and looked forward and started to rant about whatever came to mind. It was a good thing she always had at least one thing to rant about. Or she should say two, but it would be idiotic to rant to Theo about himself. It would also make her feelings for him obvious.
The two turned into a deserted hall and as they passed beneath an arch way they found that neither of them could take a step forward.
Their feet were stuck to the ground.
Y/N turned to Theo frantically, "What's going on?!"
"I dunno, I can't lift my feet off the ground."
"Neither can I..." She went silent and found that she could pivot. She looked around, and it wasn't until she looked up that she saw mistletoe hung from the high archway. But surely that had nothing to do with it, so she ignored it.
"Did the twins do this?" Theo started to ask but then remembered that the infamous pranksters had graduated. But that was all either of them could come up with, it was something the twins would do.
So maybe it was a Weasly.
The pair ended up staring at each other, the both of them ignoring the close proximity and the fact that their chests were touching.
After ten minutes Y/N had come up with an idea. It was a stupid one and she wasn't sure if it would even work. But Theo wouldn't stop staring at her and she was sure she looked like a tomato under the heat of his gaze.
"Theo." She said.
"Y/N."
The girl took a deep breath before blurting the words, "Kiss me."
"W-what?" Theo stuttered, his heart beating ten times faster now and a light blush coating his cheeks. His eyes flicked down to the lips he dreamt about kissing, the plump lips he fantasized about at night. He swallowed thickly and met her eyes once more. "I- Why?"
"I'm just-" She paused, "Testing out a theory." She wanted to kiss him, but she didn't at the same time. She didn't want to kiss him under these circumstances, if she was going to kiss him she wanted him to know it was because she liked him.
"Okay..." Theo said slowly and Y/N looked up at him with determination in her eyes.
She took a deep breath and brought her hands up to the boys face, instinctually his hands found her waist, "I really really like Theodore Nott!" She blurted quickly before smashing her lips onto his.
Theo stood still for a moment before he realized she was kissing him, and he wasn't kissing her back. So he did.
The kiss was sloppy, and rushed, and there was passion and hunger in it. Both of them seemed t have forgotten what was happening, losing themselves in the kiss of their lives.
It was only when she tugged on the hairs at the back of Theos head and he let out a groan did Y/N realize what she was doing.
Horrified she pushed him off, and when he stumbled back a step she saw that her theory was right and she bolted off. Running far far away from the boy and her feelings.
Meanwhile Theo stood there, dazed and confused and impossible flustered, and all he could think about was that he had just kissed her. And he knew he was going to marry her.
"She likes me too." He mumbled, smiling to himself as his fingers brushed across his lips.
No clue how to go on from this. Might make part two ;3
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pinksatinsashes · 3 months
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The Dream Girl's Guide to Setting and Achieving Goals
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If there's one thing that I am insanely good at, it's planning and setting goals.
However I have not always been great at achieving them.
Call it laziness, lack of self discipline or being over ambitious, you can take your pick. But every year I would set goals and every year I would never achieve them.
This year I was, and am determined to transform. I'm tired of putting it off. I've tried a completely different method (read about that here) and it's finally working out, I cant't wait to share it with you.
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Why is Setting and Achieving Goals Important?
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Setting and achieving goals will forever be important, no matter what stage of life you're in if you don't want time to pass while you stay in the same place.
If you're happy staying exactly as you are, looking the same way, doing the same thing everyday, making the same money, dating the same guy or having the same conversations, year after year after year. Then this post simply isn't for you.
But for the rest of us, who want more, who understand that wanting something different means that you have to do something different, who want to grow, learn and develop and that who understand that time is the most valuable thing that we have; setting and achieving things, day after day, month after month and year after year is insanely important.
If you are one of us, I'm sure you already knew that, the issue might be actually following through.
You're good at setting goals, not so much with actually achieving them?
Maybe it's not your fault, maybe you're just doing it wrong.
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------------- How To Set Goals -------------
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How many of us start the new year, or the random day that we decide we need to be better by writing a list of Goals?
Maybe that list looks something like this.
Lose 10lbs
Grow Hair Longer
Dress Better
Save Money
Get 1000 followers on X platform
Can you see the problem here? My STEM girlies are yelling at the screen saying that the goals aren't SMART (Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Timely).
The real problem?
All of these goals are end products.
And to eliminate this problem, and make these goals better, we have to turn them into habits.
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-------- How to turn Goals into Habits --------
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Let's go through our list again.
Lose 10lbs -> Workout 4 times a week, do one form of excerise a day and eat at a caloric deficit.
Grow Hair Longer -> Keep hair in protective styles, use hair growth oils daily, only brush hair when in conditioner
Dress Better -> Sell the clothes I don't like to buy clothes I do like, do a closet clear out once a month, only buy things that are high quality
Save Money -> Budget all money once a month, unsubscribe from things I no longer use, declutter and sell things I no longer need once a month.
Get 1000 followers on X platform -> Post 3 times a week, create meaningful content, reply to all comments left on posts daily, interact with posts from others in the sam niche every day
Can you see the difference?
By changing your goals from the end product to the process these goals suddenly mean more. They're more helpful and seem much more achievable.
End goals cannot always be controlled, you can do everything right, post 3 times a week, reply to all your comments and your following count may still not change for months... then all of a sudden something goes viral and they'll call you an overnight success.
By shifting your focus to the things you can control, rather than the end product, your sense of achievement comes from your consistency and hard work, allowing you to keep going even when you don't see any changes.
This prevents you from giving up when success could be just around the corner.
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-------- How To Achieve Your Goals --------
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Now that we've gone through how to set Goals, lets talk about how to achieve them.
A lot of people just stop at the first part and never think about the things that they can do to ensure that their goals are met.
Never stop at the list.
Why?
You have no initiative to ever look at this list again so you'll most likely forget you even wrote them down in a few weeks
You haven't factored how your life may make achieving these goals a priority.
The answer to this problem?
Turning your Habits into Routines.
It's all well and good setting goals, even setting good goals. But you also need to make sure that you're creating an environment that's conducive to the goals you want to achieve, the habits you want to keep, and the life you want to create.
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------- How to turn Habits into Routines ------
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We've written down all our goals, turned them into habits and now it's time of the most important part, turning them into routines.
This is important because consistency is key, always. Instead of saying that you'll do something 3 times a week and leaving at that, let's go deeper.
Which days of the week will you do it? What time? For how long?
Leaving it up to chance is risky. What if you forget?
We need to create consistent routines.
Pick which days to do your habits
Pick what time you'll do your habits
Pick how long you'll do them for
Pick what you'll do before and after.
Try to make this as consistent as possible, for example, same time every day, same day every week.
Make sure that every single hour is accounted for, even if it's just set as free time.
Its easy to convince yourself you don't have enough time to do things, let's put all the things you have to do into a spreadsheet with how long it'll take and when you'll do it. Better yet we can use a calendar app or website.
See all the free time you've got?
Now creating routine is so much more than writing it down and doing it everyday or every week. At first you may have to check the app every five seconds to see what you're meant to be doing but if you stay consistent, after a few weeks it'll become second nature.
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------------ Removing Distractions ----------
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Organising your time and creating a routine is really eye-opening because it gives you a chance to wonder what the f*** you've been spending your time doing.
Nothing productive probably. Take a look at your screentime, what apps are you spending your time on? How long are you spending? Is this part of the life you'd like to build for yourself?
It might be time for a break.
I am being so honest when I said that getting rid of every single distraction that could be keeping me from my goal was the single most important decision I could've made when planning 2024.
I went full on, no Netflix, no YouTube, no music, no games, no social media. No distractions. For at least the first month of my new routine and I plan on only adding everything back slowly.
I advise you do the same.
Remove the things that you can see could distract you from your goals. What's keeping you from going to bed early? What would you rather do than going to the gym?
I'm telling you, I haven't stopped working on myself, because I genuinely have nothing better to do. I've cut all the distractions out. Going on my one hour walk is now what I look forward to all day. The gym is the best part of my day.
My days currently consist of self improvement, wellness podcasts, reading Jane Austen, being active, cleaning my spaces, skincare and early nights.
But it feels like I'm living my dream life? Whenever I think of my ideal day it's never included 4 hours of mindless scrolling or spending 2 hours down a YouTube rabbit hole.
When I think of my dream life it's always been home cooked meals, reading and fancy skincare routines. I couldn't be happier and I really don't feel like I'm missing out on anything.
TRY IT.
This is probably the most important step because the power that distractions have on us is so real.
You can do all the planning and have the best intentions but if your want to play games, scroll mindlessly on social media, text a guy that doesn't care about you or engage in celebrity drama is greater than your want to be better? Good Luck Charlie.
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---- Making Your Goal Your Obsession ----
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This is actually the fun part.
All I do is listen to podcasts about my goal, read books about my goals, make pinterest boards about my goals and talk to myself about my goals. I'm so obsessed.
Make a reading list, find some podcasts that align with your goals, follow blogs with the same mindset, talk to those of your friends that will get it.
This makes sure that nothing can distract you, and you can't just 'forget' to work towards your goal.
However, you must not let your time obsessing over your goal be more than your time actually working on your goal. Do not forget that.
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------------- Books that could help ------------
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Atomic Habits by James Clear
Digital Minimalism by Cal Newport
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----- May the odds be ever in your favour.. -----
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ghostboneswrites2 · 2 months
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A Mess || Part 7
New account! @ghostbones was banned! Transferring everything here starting with this series since it was the most popular!
A/N: The long awaited seventh part :)
Summary: After escaping the treehouse, you and Daryl must find food, water, and rest in the forest on your way to complete the mission Rick had sent you on in the first place. You also almost die.
18+ MDNI || WARNINGS: profanity, TWD typical violence, Daryl being effortlessly attractive
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        You laid silently on the wooden flooring, out of site of the hungry beasts below. Daryl sat against a wall, sharpening a knife. Whoever built this thing left no form of entertainment or even comfort. Just some random tools and scrap wood. Guess they never got a chance to actually use their treehouse.
        "I'm bored." You complained.
        "Quiet." He whispered. You sighed.
        "I'm bored." You whispered. He sighed.
        "Can't do nothin' about that."
        "Wanna play twenty-one questions?" You asked.
        "Sure." He said, setting the knife down. "I'll start. What would it take for you to shut up?" He asked. You shot him a glare. He smirked and went back to sharpening his knife.
        "You'd be the worst person to be stranded on an island with." You grumbled.
        "Nah. I'll keep us fed."
        "I'd rather die of starvation than boredom."
        "Might get your wish. Food'll be out by tomorrow." He sighed. It had been two days. Two fucking days.
        "Water?' You asked.
        "Out."
        "Fuck." You sighed. "Might as well just jump down and end it."
        "How many bullets ya got?"
        "Like, six."
        "Got thirteen bolts and nine rounds."
        "So thirteen shots, thirteen bullets. How many are down there?" You asked.
        "More than twenty-six." He said.
        "What if we distracted them somehow?" You suggested.
        "How?"
        "I don't know. Don't you have a lighter sir-smokes-a-lot?"
        He nodded.
        "So, we light a bolt or two on fire and you shoot it at a tree far away."
        "Might not work." He warned.
        "But it might, and that's better than nothing." You countered.
        "Okay." He nodded. "We wait 'til dark. It'll be our best bet."
----
        That night he dropped the rope ladder down and the two of you climbed about halfway down. Just enough that you could leap down without injury. Daryl shot two flaming arrows at two different trees in opposing directions. To your surprise they actually drew a decent chunk of the walkers away, but  not all of them. You knew it wouldn't work for long, so your window was short.
        With a nod, you both lept down to the ground with knives in hand, taking down the three or four walkers that were he closest to you. Then, you ran. You ran as fast as you could in the pitch back, relying on the sound of his own footsteps ahead of you to guide you. 
        By the time it was safe enough to slow down, you chest was on fire and all you could do was hunch over and pant for air. Thankfully you two had lost the walkers a ways back, but unfortunately now you had no idea where you were. Just trees and more trees shrouded in darkness.
        "I think if we keep goin' this way there's a town. Can follow that road due north and we'll find where we were headed." Daryl finally announced, still short of breath.
        "Should we just go back?"  You asked, finally standing up straight. "To the prison, I mean? We've been gone for days, now. They're probably worried."
        "Nah." He declined. "Been gone this long, we're goin' back with what we left for in the first damn place.
----
        By daylight, your feet were blistered and sore and you hadn't stopped walking. The plan was to find some place in town to rest, but it was a long journey. Neither of you had spoken a word. Exhaustion and hunger were too overbearing. 
        "Can't you like... Shoot something so we can eat?" You whined. "I'm thirsty. And hungry. And tired. And--"
        "And you say I'd be the worst person to be stranded with." He grumbled.
        "Weren't you the one that said you'd keep us fed on a deserted island?" You shot back.
        "Yeah, right after I asked what it'd take for you to shut the hell up."
        "Food. That's what it would take." You told him. He sighed.
        "Alright. Start a fire. I'll be back with some grub." He relented, offering you his zippo. You didn't protest. You got straight to work throwing twigs and dry leaves into a small pit you dug and ignited them with his lighter. It wasn't cold, so you didn't stay too close. It was hot enough without the extra heat. You did, however, hear a very faint trickling sound. Could it be? Water? Finally?
        You immediately followed the noise. As it grew closer you got excited. You might actually have had something to reward Daryl for finding you food.
        You stopped in your tracks. It definitely wasn't a glistening stream of cool clear water. No, in fact, it was just Daryl, taking a piss on a tree.
        "Do ya mind? Some privacy would be nice." He complained. You sighed and did a 180, trying to shake the image out of your mind.
        "Sorry." You mumbled. "When I heard the trickling I thought there was a little stream or something over here."
        You turned back to him when you heard a zip. 
        "Could probably drink that." He shrugged. Your jaw gaped.
        "Ew!" You shrilled.
        "How ya think I survived eight days on my own in the woods when I was a kid?" He smirked. He was just messing with you, but he had no intentions of admitting that. Your expression was too priceless.
        "Say less." You held your hand up. "I'll wait for you by the fire."
        With that, you were on your way. Back by the fire, you sat and sharpened some thin sticks to keep yourself busy. They'd make nice skewers for the meat if he could find any game.
        It was probably an hour or two until he made it back, and not only had you sharpened a lot of sticks, but you also had created a flimsy perimeter out of fallen branches and other forest debris. You figured if nothing else, it would at least trip a walker and let you know they were coming.
        "Got a raccoon." He said. It was already skinned, he just needed to skewer the meat, which you helped him with. It had a strange aroma as it cooked. You were never a fan of rodents or the like.
        However, the full feeling after scarfing down its delicious flesh made all of your complaints go out the window. As you licked each charred stick skewer clean of the grease, you moaned. "Thank you." You said. "I was so hungry."
        "Mm." He grunted with a nod. "Say we take turns gettin' some shuteye an' head out in a few hours."
        "I'll take first watch." You offered. 
        "Nah. Need to tune up my bow. You rest." He declined. You shrugged. 
        "Suit yourself."
        You weren't going to argue. You were exhausted.
----
        When Daryl opened his eyes, you were still sound asleep just a few feet away. It was pitch black outside. The fire had been out for a while. He remembered putting it out himself. There was no need for it after the meat was cooked and the remnants of the animal were burned to ash. He wiped his eyes and pushed his aching body up into a sitting position. How could he have fallen asleep? He was meant to keep watch. Anything could have happened to either of you while you were both out. He silently scolded himself. 
        His throat was dry and scratchy. He really needed to find some water for the two of you. Another day like that and you'd both be dead for sure. He sighed and moved over to you. He crouched down beside you, reaching to shake you awake, but something stopped him. You looked so peaceful, but you also looked dry. Your lips were cracked and flaky, and had it not been so dark he would have seen how dry the skin on your face looked. 
        "(Y/N)." He whispered, laying a hand on your arm to gently shake you awake. You didn't budge. "(Y/N), c'mon. We gotta get movin', we need to find some water."
        "Hmph." You made a little puty noise as you rolled away from him. Had he not been so damn thirsty, he would have laughed.
        "We can't survive like this much longer." He continued in a hushed rasp. "Get up."
        "Tired." You mumbled.
        "I said get the hell up." He demanded.
        "No."
        "Fine then. Stay here and die." He huffed, standing to his feet and gathering both of your things before he stormed away. He made sure his footsteps were loud so you could hear him walk away, hoping you'd feel the pressure and get up. He stopped when he realized you had no intentions of doing so. With frustration, he threw his head back and turned around. "C'mon. I ain't tellin' ya again."
        Nothing. Not a peep, not a shuffle, not a damn thing. He groaned.
        "You're a fuckin' child, ya know that?" He grumbled as he marched over to you and scooped you up, throwing you over his shoulder.
        "Hey!" You whined. You slapped at his back. 
        "Quit your bitchin'." He scolded. 
        "Fine. I'll just sleep like this." You reasoned, closing your eyes and trying to ignore the feeling of his shoulder digging into your stomach.
        "Like hell you are." He said as he dropped you down on your feet. "I got your shit. Now walk."
        "It's dangerous to travel at night." You pointed out.
        "It's more dangerous to die of thirst." He argued.
        "Not as dangerous as disturbing a woman's beauty rest." You crossed your arms.
        "Beauty rest." He scoffed. "You don't need any. Now walk." He demanded, pointing his finger in the direction he wanted to go.
        "Fine, but only 'cause you asked so nicely." You gave in.
        Besides your bickering, the night was relatively quiet, save for the crickets and frogs and rustling branches. After a little while, Daryl handed you your things, growing tired of carrying them for you. After another while, he stopped you, holding his hand out in front of you.
        "Ya hear that?" He whispered. You perked up your ears, listening intently. It took a few seconds but finally you heard it, a soft white noise that you could only assume was; "Water!" You gasped.
        "Mm." He nodded. "C'mon." 
        You followed after him, creeping silently over the dead foliage of the forest floor. Just a few yards away you stumbled across a small creek. 
        "Do we have anything to boil water?" You asked.
        "Nah." He shook his head, holding an empty plastic jug in the water as it flowed by. "Just have to take our chances with it."
        You flipped his zippo that you were still holding onto open and held it down to the creek.
        "Looks clear at least." You observed. Even in the small firelight you could see clearly to the bottom of the shallow stream.
        "Here." He offered you the first sip. Well, not really a sip. More like a gulp, or two, or ten. You wiped your mouth as you handed it back to him. He drank his own share before dunking the jug back into the stream and letting it fill all the way. When it filled up, he screwed the lid on and you both stood up. You gave his lighter back, before you forgot, and the two of you set off again with full bellies, a jug of water, and some rest under your belt.
----
        "Sure we could one of these cars runnin'." Daryl said. It was just past daybreak  now. You finally found the town that was supposed to lead you to the town you needed to be in. The two of you were in a small neighborhood with cars lined up and down the streets.
        "I'll keep an eye out." You told him. He nodded and got to work checking out the vehicles.
        As far as walkers go, the town wasn't too bad off. A few stragglers here and there, but nothing seemed particularly overrun. It was pretty small and rural, though, so that was no surprise.
        You took down a lone walker that trudged toward you and turned your attention back to Daryl to check in. He may have been dirty and smelly after four days on the run, but damn he did look good. 
        His tan arms glistened in the sunlight with a sweaty sheen. His hair stuck to his forehead tightly and his muscles flexed and contorted under his skin as he yanked car doors open and leaned in the driver's side doors to try to crank them up. 
        "Shit!" You hissed as you fell to the ground. A walker had snuck up on you in your lusty stupor, falling on top of you as you struggled against the mangled thing. "Asshole!" You insulted the corpse as you struggled to reach for the knife you dropped on your way to the ground. It was too far, though, and if you shifted at all the walker's mouth would surely make contact with your face. 
        A whistle shot over you and an arrow impacted the top of the walker's skull. It went limp on top of you. You gagged at the feeling of its dry rotten flesh against your chest. Daryl appeared over you and yanked the body off yours, pulling his arrow out of its head.
        "The hell were ya doin'? Just one took ya down?" He asked as he held a hand out. You accepted it and he pulled you to your feet effortlessly.
        "Uh, I was just -- Uh, yeah. Didn't hear it." You stuttered.
        "Pay attention." He scolded you.
        "Right. Won't happen again." You nodded. You definitely wouldn't be admitting that you almost lost your life just to admire his sweaty arms.
        "C'mon. These cars are dead. Let's move down the street a bit an' see if we got better luck." He instructed. 
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breelandwalker · 11 months
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Strawberry Moon - June 3, 2023
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Grab your baskets and your moon jars, witches - it's time for the Strawberry Moon!
Strawberry Moon
The Strawberry Moon is the name given to the full moon which occurs in the month of June in the Northern Hemisphere. The name is taken from the ripening of those little red heart-shaped berries we find in so many summertime treats. Strawberries are typically ready to harvest beginning around the summer solstice, though this will vary depending on variety, planting times, and local weather. The Strawberry Moon, sadly, does not turn pink to match the berries.
Other European names for this moon include Honey Moon, Rose Moon, and Mead Moon. Indigenous names for the June moon include Blooming Moon (Anishinaabe), Green Corn Moon (Cherokee), and Hatching Moon (Cree).
What Does It Mean For Witches?
Full moons are excellent times for bringing wishes to fulfillment and plans to fruition, all the more so under one named after a prolific berry. This is an optimal time to make things happen!
Your intuition may be stronger than usual during this time, so pay attention to those little inklings and gut feelings that won't be ignored. They might be telling you something important. Dreams may also be more vivid, though not necessarily more accurate or revealing.
This is a time to explore things that catch your attention or pique your curiosity, and to let yourself be open to new ideas and new opportunities.
What Witchy Things Can We Do?
With a full moon in the sky and the summer solstice hot on its' heels, it's time to prepare for a full bloom. Here's hoping you've been nurturing those plans and seeds of growth you planted in the spring, because they're about to start flowering and the way is clear to sow the next stage of your plans. What they will be and what new prospects the summer will bring is entirely up to you.
With the moon in Sagittarius again this year, it's a good time to look ahead to the future. Think on the plans you have in process and let yourself dream of how things might turn out. If you're inclined to journaling, make a note of how things are going so far and how you hope they'll turn out. Pick your favorite divination method and do a reading for the month ahead. (Make sure you write that down too so you can check back later!)
This is a great time to go berry-picking or flower-gathering, so check your area for pick-your-own farms or farmer's markets with local produce. Have a picnic with friends or just enjoy a quiet afternoon with your own thoughts and a few favorite treats. Make a jar of sun tea or a sweet and summery berry salad. If you're partial to strawberries, indulge that sweet tooth!
Strawberries are also excellent ingredient in spells for love, beauty, fertility, and emotional healing. Create a charm for self-love or perhaps to attract a summer romance. Enchant your favorite makeup or skin care products with a glamour of confidence. Just as expectant mothers once carried strawberry leaves as a folk remedy for pregnancy pains, you can carry a clutch of them in your pocket to help heal a broken heart or assuage the pain of grief. A packet of strawberry leaves is also a potent good-luck charm. Snack on strawberries to bring fertile abundance into your life, whether you're looking for creativity or opportunity or perhaps hoping to grow your family this year.
Charge your crystals and spell jars and moon water under the light of Strawberry Moon to catch the energy of blooming flowers, ripening fruit, wishes coming true, and carefully-laid plans realized. (If you're planning to use it for any consumables, please make sure you're using fresh, potable drinking water rather than rain or runoff.)
Spend a little time reflecting on how your year has gone thus far. Try to focus on the things that have improved and how you've grown as a person and in your life journey. Reflect on your accomplishments and what you plan to do next. Take a moment to be unashamedly proud of yourself for everything you've done and for making it this far despite everything life throws at you.
Happy Strawberry Moon, witches! 🌕🍓
Further Reading:
Strawberry Moon: Full Moon in June 2023, The Old Farmer's Almanac
Strawberry Moon 2023: The Spectacular Spiritual Meaning of June's Full Moon, The Peculiar Brunette
Everyday Moon Magic: Spells & Rituals for Abundant Living, Dorothy Morrison
Image Source - Pesto and Margaritas
(If you're enjoying my content, please feel free to drop a little something in the tip jar or check out my published works on Amazon or in the Willow Wings Witch Shop. 😊)
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swanimagines · 2 months
Text
A MISTAKE | KAZ BREKKER
Summary: Imagine doing an unsuccessful heist and Kaz taking it out on you.
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The heist hadn't gone as planned. It was no one's fault, you had just been incredibly unlucky, but Kaz was still enraged at everyone and looking for a guilty one, accusing everyone on their turn before you stepped in.
"Kaz, stop it." You sighed, wrapping your arms around yourself. "We could have done nothing otherwise. Sometimes these things happen, it isn't anyone's fault. You made a brilliant plan, we all tried to follow it-"
"No," Kaz grumbled, glaring at you in turn. "A mistake like this can't happen without someone taking responsibility. You weren't much of an use either, or what were you doing there at the hallway when guards were rushing towards us? We could have hid, but you gave us away before we could. I blame you all the same for this failure!" He shouted, his eyes flashing dangerously.
Your face dropped at Kaz's words and you took a step back from him. His hands clenched around his cane as he glared at you.
"I didn't do anything wrong," you mumbled, trying to hold his gaze.
He snorted and turned away from you. "Yes, you did. This wasn't your first job, so why the hell did you think you could get away with going solo there?!"
You rolled your eyes, clenching your jaw. "I had to! They could have reached us and killed us all if I didn't slow them down!"
Kaz scoffed. "If you would have followed the plan, we could have had an opportunity to hide!"
"No," you shook your head quickly. "They knew exactly where we were, they would have surrounded us and either imprisoned us or killed us! For your information, I saved our lives so thank you so much for your fucking gratitude!"
"Kaz, they're right, we could have-" Jesper tried to intervene but Kaz interrupted him.
"This is between me and them, keep your mouth shut!" Kaz growled.
"Hey, let's just all take some time to calm down." Wylan murmured as he carefully approached you but Kaz still hadn't stopped.
"You're of no use," he snarled at you. "We don't need people like you during heists, maybe you should take up the broom instead or stay in your room, out of sight."
"Kaz!" Inej scolded him while the rest of the Crows stood dumbfounded, staring at Kaz in shock.
Your eyes became glossy, tears threatening to spill over. But Kaz still didn't seem to care. So you turned around and sprinted towards the Slat, letting the cold wind bite your face as your tears finally began cascading over your cheeks.
The Crows stood there for a while, seeing you disappearing to the crowd. Then they all laid disappointed looks at Kaz.
"Happy now?" Nina sighed and started walking faster, with no doubt of wanting to offer a listening ear for your once again broken heart.
They all knew you both had feelings for each other, but you didn't deserve to be treated like this by him. Kaz was usually cool and collected, but his conflicted feelings for you merged with frustration was never pretty to watch. But this was something worse than your usual bickerings, and Inej noticed the slight flash of regret in Kaz's eyes. He hid it incredibly well, but it was still there. She'd pop by his window in the morning and talk him into apologising to you like so many times before - you deserved to know he still cared about you, even when you had fights like these. She was just concerned about how many fights would you take before giving up on him...
---
Inej's presence floated in the air early in the morning. Sun had barely risen, and Kaz had once again stayed awake the whole night. You had usually made him sleep a little, even take a nap. Telling him his brains would be able to work harder if he slept and he wouldn't feel so frustrated.
But yesterday, from obvious reasons, you hadn't come to talk him into going into bed for a little while. It had felt weird, but Kaz knew the reason. Nina had taken food with her at the evening and headed towards your room, laying a glare at Kaz as she passed him but didn't say anything.
Kaz had sensed Inej long before the shadow passed his desk and Inej's soft steps approached him.
"Kaz," she sighed. "You owe them an apology."
Kaz ignored her. "What time is it?"
"Early."
"Is anyone else awake yet? We need to start working on a new plan."
"No. We need to talk about your fight yesterday with a certain Dreg."
"Why?" Kaz asked, irritated.
"When will you go and apologise to them?"
"There's nothing to apologise for."
"You had them cry in Nina's arms for an hour. Nina had to help them to fall asleep. So yes, you do have something to apologise for."
"It's fine, Inej."
"I'm serious, Kaz."
"They'll get over it."
"If you want them to hate you forever."
"They already hate me," Kaz muttered.
Inej sighed, staring at Kaz for a moment. Kaz ignored her accusatory look and just continued working with the plan. Suddenly, Inej's hand appeared on his way.
"Saints, Kaz!" she exclaimed suddenly and Kaz's eyes met hers for the first time today. "You need to think about their feelings for once."
"I don't have time to think about whether someone gets hurt from things I say, in the Barrel, you have to be tough and if you aren't, you're screwed." He huffed.
Inej sighed. "We all know you care about them more than you care about the rest of us. We know you have feelings for them."
Kaz paused then, letting a long breath through his nose. "I don't have feelings for them."
"You do. We all have seen how you look at each other. Nina has heard your heart when you look at them. You both are just so stubborn and won't act for it. It's getting ridiculous."
"It's not like that."
"You say it's not like that, but still everything points the other way."
"You don't know what you're talking about," Kaz growled, his fingers tapping the desk.
Inej groaned. "Kaz, you know you want to go to apologise. Swallow your pride for once.."
He huffed. "Dirtyhands being soft for someone doesn't fit the picture."
Inej laughed and rolled her eyes. "I know that while living in the Barrel and being a crime boss, it's necessary. But I know you. This is just petty, and you don't want to lose them. Go apologise. Or I'll drag you there."
Kaz looked at Inej for a moment longer before he took a big breath in and stood up. "Fine," he grumbled, "I'll go talk to them."
---
Kaz didn't know how long exactly he had stood in front of your room. He couldn't help but think that you would be too angry at him to speak - and Inej's claim of you having feelings for him.
It wasn't possible. Kaz's feelings for you were hardly possible, so yours would be even less. And you'd deserve someone better than him anyway.
Kaz tried to convince himself of this, but a little voice echoed at the back of his head.
What if they do like you back?
He stared at your door for a moment longer before finally bringing himself to knock.
A groan was heard and then your groggy voice, "Coming..."
The door opened and Kaz's heart started to beat faster the moment he saw you. You squinted your eyes at the light and when you recognised him, your expression immediately transformed into a scowl.
"What do you want?" you snapped, your hands on your hips and your hair messy from sleep.
Kaz opened his mouth but then shut it again. You were angry, he was sorry but he didn't know how to word it. He sighed.
"I thought we should talk this through," he finally said, taking a step forward.
You didn't say anything and just stared at him for a moment. "Oh, mighty Dirtyhands wants to talk now."
Kaz groaned and was quiet for a moment. "I owe you... an apology."
"I don't want to hear it," you said and attempted to slam the door shut, but Kaz got his cane between it and pushed himself inside to your room.
"We need to talk," Kaz said, moving his cane into your way again. "And I won't leave until we do."
"Stop that," you snapped.
"Why?"
"Because I'm trying to be mad at you."
Kaz bit back a smile at that. "If you want to be mad at me, you need to have a proper reason for it."
You huffed and crossed your arms. "Fine, then talk."
Kaz sighed and laid his gaze on his hands gripping the cane. "What I said last night was needless and inconsiderate. I..." He clenched his jaw and cast his eyes downwards for a moment, and then met your eyes again and continued. "I apologise for it."
He glanced up at you, expecting to still see your anger, but instead, your expression was confused.
"Well, I wasn't expecting that."
Kaz smirked at your confusion. "I know how to be an asshole, but I'm trying to be a good boss, too."
You chuckled. "I've gotten used to you being an asshole even when I know you care about me- care about us, I mean, so... it's weird to hear you apologise."
Kaz huffed with a small smile, his heart thudding. He smiled at you, and you were smiling too, and he felt his heart jump at that.
"Have you slept at all last night?" you asked him.
Kaz shook his head. "No. I had work."
You sighed and rolled your eyes. "Work can wait, you go have a nap right now."
You opened the door for him, and you began ascending the stairs together. Kaz smirked at your order. "And if I won't?"
You laughed. "I'll knock you out and drag you to bed. Your call."
---
Requests are always open! FANDOM LIST | PROMPT LIST(S) | RULES (READ!!!)
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shadowystan · 6 months
Text
YANDERE! celebrity x f!reader – he's so pretty, so popular (you really don't wanna be his sweetheart)
No but YANDERE!celebrity with a toxic fanbase.
It's not him you should be scared of. Not his bodyguards or his influential family; not his obsessive ex or crushing best friend.
The fanbase.
Jealous fans would cloud your life. If you have social media, you'd be hacked a few thousand times a week. If you block them, turn off your comments and go private, you'd get doxxed. Plain and simple.
It's upsetting. It's suffocating. And it's downright terrifying whenever you're out in public. Death threats at your face, stalkers outside your door. No peace of mind, none whatsoever.
But of course if you're pretty enough...
YANDERE!fans who want nothing but the best for their idol. Only someone as dazzling as you could deserve him.
(It's set in stone. You have no choice.)
YANDERE!fans who're the epitome of degeneracy. Writing dirty, smutty fanfiction on the side while making ship edits with you and their celebrity. It doesn't matter how many times you've streamed live, asking them to quit it because the both of you weren't official or how much it makes you uncomfortable.
YANDERE!fans who instead of agreeing and respecting your wishes, go as far as to send you everything. Gone are the rules of RPF. They're spiteful, they're overbearing and most of all, they want you to know you have no power.
YANDERE!fans who litter whoever you try to date with messages of "kill yourself <3" or "jump off a roof. respectfully." on their social media comments or DMs.
YANDERE!fans who spread elaborate rumors about you when you do something that remotely doesn't meet their standards.
The air was soothing. The atmosphere lively. You heard the chatter of the birds, the laughs of the couples, the giggles of the teen girls-
"-Let's say she assaulted someone!"
What?
Leaning slightly to the left, you nonchalantly readjusted the dark spectacles framing your eyes. Hoodie pulled over your face and a lone piece of lettuce peeking out of your lips, the thought that someone might recognize you left your mind for the briefest of times.
And you focused on the task at hand. Eavesdropping on the conversation happening two tables to your side.
They were being rather loud. And concerning. Quite concerning.
"-That's too much, Sana." A puff of air left your mouth, a reassured smile curling in it's stead. At least Sana had wise friends-
"I mean how bad would it look for Iseul's reputation? He can't be dating an assaulter!"
You froze.
Iseul. Iseul. Iseul. Iseul Iseul Iseul Iseul-
That damned name.
A bunch of collective "oohs" and "aahs" splattered. The teenagers nodded in agreement, being particularly vocal.
"Let's say she bullied one of us!"
"Or that she has been to prison!"
"We caught her shoplifting?"
"Boring!"
A fry was thrown at whoever said the last word. Useless bickering followed by rolls of their eyes, the girls easily overcame the little hindrance and got back to brainstorming.
You sucked in a breath, spoon limply hanging off your fingers.
They were definitely talking about you.
Whatever. Whatever. Whatever. It's not a big deal. This is normal-
"We should break into her house or something. The address is leaked anyway."
The table screeched, you stood up.
Legs having a brain of their own, you paced out of the restaurant, the memories of the girls fibbing and bickering and planning like no tomorrow kept echoing through your mind. Like a broken record. Since when had your life turned to such shambles?
God. Why were things like this for you?
Releasing a shaky breath, you gulped, burying the insecurity deep inside of you. Whipping the lopsided glasses away, you stop caring for a moment.
You don't care. For sure. But then your hands are moving and they're looking through your pockets, seeking for something and my goodness, since when did your phone start feeling so heavy?
Unfamiliar and hesitant, you went through your contact list, heart beating so fast that you felt like it'll rip right out of your chest. Your lips quivered, flushed skin feeling hotter and hotter by the second. A fever? Or was this anger?
You shivered, ignoring the tears and the salt and the aching, aching feel of your soul. You fiddled for a moment – just a moment – but then you're harshly pressing the call button and wiping snot off your nose before placing the phone to your ear and waiting like a madwoman. Impatient and uncalm and-
"My love! You called!"
Him.
Him. Him. Him. Him.
How you hate him.
"I'll-I'll do it,-" You spluttered, very much on the verge of choking on your own spit and mumbling strings of curses at him and them and every single person who's so, SO mean to you- "I-i'll make it official. We.. we will! Just..- just please.."
You've perished. You've perished until this second, this moment and you'll continue perishing but-
"J-just.. make them stop."
Don't you deserve a break too? With everything he puts you through?
A tsk from his side was heard. Iseul sounded amused, almost cross with you. Almost pouty. Almost smiling.
"Really now? This easy? Things were only just getting fun."
You wanted to gut YANDERE!celebrity. Brutally.
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poppadom0912 · 4 months
Text
A Prom Mess
Warnings: Shootings, blood, injuries, scared high schoolers
Summary: Prom didn't go according to plan.
A/N: This has been collecting too much dust in my drafts and so I thoughts I'd spoil you all. It's my birthday today so take this as my treat for you all. <3
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Sticking your tongue out, you moved your curler back from your head, inspecting the curl in the mirror. Proud of it, you let it hang by your temple, moving around to turn off all the plugs, shoving bits of make up into a drawer.
Standing up, shoulders out, you dusted off imaginary lint from the prom dress that fit you like a glove.
It felt like all your childhood dreams were coming true, you were also somehow allowed to have a date which you might have blackmailed your brothers in allowing you to have one but you don't talk about that.
"Look at you." Jay whistled once you entered the living room. "Our baby sisters all grown up now." He elbowed Will in the gut causing him to jerk away.
Scowling at Jay, Will complimented you. "You look beautiful kid." He paused as he looked for his hospital ID. "Do a spin?"
You begrudgingly complied, spinning once to show off your dress entirely, blushing at the whistles, whoops, claps and compliments your brothers threw your way. They were acting as if they weren't there with you and Hailey when you went dress shopping.
Downing his coffee, Will would've loved to see your date before you left but he was working the night shift.
"Alright, be good, don't do drugs and call Jay if anything happens okay?" He wrapped an arm around your shoulder for a one armed hug, pressing a kiss into your hair before he was dashing out the door. "Have fun!"
Waving him goodbye, you turned to Jay who was staring at you with an emotion not many saw. If you squinted hard enough, you would've thought he was tearing up. "What's up?"
Jay shook his head, completely deflecting your question as he stood, setting down his beer. He held up his phone knowingly with a smirk, relishing in the groan you let out.
"Do we have to do pictures?" You looked at your brother, pleading for him not to. Your brother taking your pictures was slightly embarrassing, you'd provide him with the plenty you'd take all night.
"Everyone wants to see how you look." Jay indirectly mentioned his co-workers. "They're all very invested."
And he wasn't lying. Everyone at Intelligence and Med had seen you grow over the years, your final year at high school was a big thing for everyone.
You scoffed but smiled anyways trying not to look too awkward standing alone when he started snapping pictures but was stopped by the doorbell.
Your saviour was here but before he could whisk you away, he'd be involved in a very productive 'conversation' with Jay.
Jay beat you to the door, swinging it open and intensely glared at the smartly dressed boy who immediately shrunk under his gaze.
Fifteen minutes later and you were finally out the door. Pushing your date into the hallway, scowling at Jay who was very much proud of himself, forcing out a nice goodbye before you were off the the school.
*****
You straight up refused the alcohol. No matter how much your friends tried, you were up to everything but drinking. Your brothers would kill you if they had even an inkling that you touched alcohol.
Your date had long gone, staying long enough for the cute pictures before he admitted he would've preferred spending the night with his friends. Surprisingly, you couldn't care less and found yourself swept away in the 'glamours' of prom.
You and your best friend danced arm in arm and then messed around as a group, jumping ridiculously in heels and nibbling on the room temperature finger foods.
The ridiculously large crowd on the dance floor slowly started dispersing, everyone having their fill of loudly singing songs that everyone knew off by heart.
Just as you were going to make a quick detour to the bathroom to fix yourself, a familiar sound rang out in the large sports hall. The reactions were instant.
Everyone screamed and it almost drowned out the gunshots, that's how loud people were. In a flurry of movement, you grabbed your best friend who clutched tightly onto you and ran towards the exit everyone was heading to.
Running in heels was definitely not ideal but that didn't matter right now. Everyone was in a rush to get out unharmed and all in one piece.
There were so many of you that stumbling and people tripping was assured to happen and so they did. The occasional girl tripped on her dress, some catching themselves in time while others didn't. A part of you wanted to help but being stuck in this crowd, the only way was forward.
The shots continued on and they only got louder despite running away. You felt your heart lurching out you throat as it all sunk in; there was a shooting while at prom.
All of a sudden, you felt a hand grasp the back of your dress and within seconds you were falling onto the floor with someone on your back.
Trying to ignore the sharp pain in your ankle, you turned to look at the struggling girl you recognised from your chemistry class and the blood dripping down her temple made you swallow harshly.
"Harlow, come on." You tried sitting up on your knees, pulling her up from around her waist. "Hurry up, come on."
Clutching onto each others waist, you both fell to the back of the crowd. Harlow was getting drowsier as time went on and you were struggling more to support her weight against your own and the gunshots still weren't stopping.
For a split second, you let yourself think that this could be it. A night that was meant to be for celebration and saying goodbye had turned incredibly sour and at this rate, would be a day everyone would want to forget.
Wincing at the sharp pain in your ankle, you cursed your stupid heels and were ready to stop against the wall when the weight against your body decreased massively.
Snapping your head up, you were ready to do anything really but stopped yourself when you were met with a frazzled boy in a no longer neat tux that you recognised from the football team.
He nodded wordlessly and the three of you walked forward, watching with a pit in your stomach as the crowd ahead got smaller and smaller.
Gosh, your best friend had your phone in her purse. You couldn't even call Jay.
And the rest of the long corridor, that became nothing but a blur.
*****
Jay couldn't breathe.
One second, he was finishing paperwork that he forgot to do at work when his phone rang. He rolled his eyes, annoyed that he couldn't have one night off but that all changed when he heard exactly what happened.
Jay had never moved so fast before.
He could barely hear himself think over his sirens. He called you repeatedly but it went to voicemail every single time and dread began overflowing his systems. He couldn't let himself think like that, he refused.
The school was a warzone.
Somehow, he was one of the firsts to arrive and a fire caught inside his chest. His sirens and lights caught all their attention, hundreds of heads turning and staring with such desperation that Jay felt the ground crumbling underneath him.
He had to be a professional now. These kids needed him to do his job and he'd be damned if he let them down when they were all his sisters age.
Jay shouted, directing everyone away from the school, further away from danger. As loud as he could, he shouted instructions, pointing where the non-injured, injured and heavily injured should go; that should make it easier for the paramedics whenever they arrived.
As he continued to make his way through the crowd, repeating the same instructions again and again, he faintly heard Adam and Kevin shouting as loud as him and not too far behind, he could hear Boden direct his team.
With a little less pressure weighing him down, Jay swerved through the crowd, his eyes searching desperately for the shimmering pastel dress you wore but the more he looked and the more he walked, he was left with nothing.
Jay's heart was thundering out his chest know, probably heard by all neighbouring cities. His fear skyrocketed to such a height that he never knew existed.
Even without his bulletproof vest on, Jay was ready to storm the school in search of you. He needed to know, he needed to find you because what was he going to tell Will or what about the promise he made to his mum when she-
"Jay!"
The detective whipped around so fast it was almost inhumane. He looked around for anyone he could recognise before stopping at the running figure of your best friend.
She looked relatively alright. Her hair was a mess, a few marks ruining her dress and dirt collecting at the bottom as it dragged but her eyes were frantic and red and in her hands were her purse and your phone. He could recognise that case anywhere, it had been sitting in his draw for a month before gifting it on your birthday.
No no no no
"Mr Halstead?" Jay flinched at the words, hating how he was called what his dad was. No matter how many times the school called him, he'd never get used to it.
"Sorry- Detective Halstead." The boy immediately apologised, his eyes brightening despite the hellscape that surrounded him and the dark sky.
The boy couldn't find any words, his eyes dimming as fast as they were lit. Jay turned his back to your best friend who had no words for him, his eyes zeroing in on the blood droplets on the boys white shirt, his blazer nowhere to be seen.
Suddenly, the boy was holding Jay's forearm and dragging him in a different direction. If he wasn't so concerned, he would've been impressed with how strong the boy was.
Several twists and turns later, Jay was finally able to breathe again, oxygen rushing through his veins as the world around him faded away and became nothing but white noise.
"Jay!"
You cried out, tears spilling the second you lay eyes on your older brother. He was disheveled but any outsider would say Jay looked perfect, nothing out of place. You knew your brother though and the fear swallowing him was something you never wanted to see again.
"Thank goodness." Jay mumbled, rushing forward and enveloping you in his arms. Being in his embrace only made you cry more, your hands curling and gripping his shirt so tight your nails hurt.
Jay's nose dipped into your hair, inhaling your familiar scent and placing several kisses to comfort you or himself, you didn't know but you also didn't care.
"Are you guys okay?" Jay got a grip of himself, forcing himself to pull away and look at the mini group surrounding him now. With an arm still around you, he inspected you and the girl sitting besides you and the several other teenagers that looked at him as though he hung the stars in the sky.
Gosh, Jay would never get rid of that sight from his memory. The fear painting your eyes in bold, looking for a saviour with such hope all eighteen year olds became innocent toddlers.
"My heads banging."
"My ankle's done for."
"I've got a few scratches."
"My hands bleeding."
"My arms bleeding I think."
"I think I'm good."
"I don't know."
"My leg hurts real bad."
Several voices overlapped as they all responded to him, their eyes still wide. They all looked so childlike Jay's heart clenched.
"Alright, it's going to be okay. I've got you all, I promise."
They held onto his promise like it was their lifeline and they were all drowning. Their grips so tight is was suffocating.
*****
Will was almost on autopilot. He wasn’t too sure how he hadn’t gone completely mad at this rate.
The ED was swarmed as it usually was following a mass shooting and no matter how many there were in Chicago, you could never really become accustomed to the chaos of it all.
Will wanted it to be a coincidence that several new adults were being wheeled in all fancily dressed up, he so badly wished that other proms were happening at the same time as yours but his fears came true when he recognised your best friend walking in beside a paramedic by her side.
The ED was overwhelmed beyond possibility that Will wasn’t given the chance to call Jay to at least get a hint at what was going down. One of the biggest reliefs was seeing no one heavily wounded, no one was bleeding out to death.
He’d been handing over a patient upstairs to make some more room when he heard his name being called and his hate rate instantly spiked. Turning around as fast as he could, Will wasn’t too sure how to feel when he finally set eyes on you.
Relief was short lived as he caught sight of the blooding dripping down your arm and how heavily you relied on Jay to help you walk, you were hobbling in your heels and several worn out classmates were at your side and following behind.
“Will, I’ve got no room.” Maggie solemnly told the doctor, her face and tone telling what Will already knew.
“It’s all good, follow me guys.” Will gestured for the group to follow him through the ED, pointing them in the correct direction and helping the others walk.
Moving out the ED but then moving into a slightly less packed corridor, Will apologetically asked for them to sit down on the few beds they managed to fit and the chairs they had on standby. The situation wasn’t ideal but they’d done it plenty times before and it worked perfectly.
Before he could ask, April and Doris were following right behind them, arms filled with equipment. With barely any words shared, the three of them got to work tending to the group you walked in with.
Will came to you first and with Maggie’s permission curtesy of a stressed-out Goodwin, he’d been allowed to treat you. With gentle hands, Will surveyed the cut on your arm, asking you all the questions part of protocol. You were semi-delirious because you snorted at your brothers professional side that came out automatically without much thought or effort.
Upon hearing you complain about your ankle, Will crouched down to the floor, and prodded your foot, his touch as light as a feather, hands withdrawing when you whimpered in pain.
Trying to push his brotherly smothering aside, Will continued to remain as professional as he could, cleaning up the bullet graze on your arm, delicately placing on butterfly strips and covering it wholly.
“I’ll send you up for an x-ray but it’s going to take a while.” Will didn’t need to explain why, it was pretty obvious. “Just sit tight for me but I’ll get you some painkillers for the meantime, that sound good?”
You hummed, smiling up at your oldest brother who was now standing up. You hadn’t seen yourself but you knew you looked like a mess, a total 180 from the immaculate state you left earlier tonight.
“You’ll be okay kiddo.” Will said, knowing he’d get a smile out of you, fingers carding through the knots in your hair, pressing it all back before kissing you on your forehead. You weren’t too sure who he was comforting, you or himself.
“Shout if you need me.” Will told both you and Jay before moving onto the next person who just so happened to be Harlow. If it wasn’t for your pain muddled brain, you would’ve turned to watch how she was doing.
The silence that followed Will’s departure wasn’t really silence when there was incessant beeping, people conversing loudly and quietly, ambulance sirens coming and going and the occasional person expressing their pain. It was all so stimulating you couldn’t understand how Will did this for a living.
“My head hurts.” You mumbled a complaint, rubbing your temple to somehow ease your headache. Closing your eyes, you let yourself fall into Jay’s side, sighing in relief as his arms wrapped around your body and holding you close.
“I know, I’m sorry.” Jay could only provide you comfort, keeping you as close to him as possible for as long as he was allowed. “I’m sorry your prom was a mess.”
You hummed; eyes still closed. “It’s okay, at least we won’t forget it.”
Jay didn’t laugh at your joke, even when you snorted.
Right, this was going to take a awhile to get over
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exeggcute · 4 months
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well it's been almost six months which I think is long enough to break my posting embargo, so, uh: guess what! I got liposuction lol. specifically hip/thigh lipo to quell some pretty wicked dysphoria that stemmed from having such a feminine silhouette… and I have to say I'm really, really pleased with the results.
tbh my initial plan was to keep things under wraps for good which is why I haven't said anything about it yet (and even as I'm typing this up I keep debating whether to post it or trash it)—partly because I was/am worried people might Act Weird about it and partly because I get a little embarrassed talking about bodygendershit in general. but here we are. one reason I do feel compelled to finally share, other than being super happy about how everything went, is that I haven't encountered a lot of discussions about body sculpting as a possible avenue of gender-affirming care (although, to be fair, maybe I just haven't been looking in the right places) and I figured at least one person out there would be interested to learn about what I did and where I've ended up so far.
anyway. pics/details under the cut—nothing even remotely risqué (or yucky), I just know that body image stuff is fraught + not everyone is eager to hear surgery talk.
to be precise: I got tumescent liposuction of the inner and outer thigh, plus this ultrasound thing to help the skin shrink. a different surgeon who I consulted (but ultimately did not go with for a number of reasons) said that even if I got the results I wanted from lipo, which he claimed was unlikely, the affected skin would look loose/baggy/weird forever... and that surgeon was wrong on both counts lol. my elasticity was great bitch!!!!
they didn't take out that much fat overall, only eight pounds or so, but it's way more about the Where than the How Much. my actual surgeon (who kicks ass btw) said lipo isn't that great for weight loss per se, and what it's really good for is sculpting targeted areas—so basically exactly what I did. six months post-op I actually weigh about the same as what I did pre-op, but the distribution has held steady; more weight goes to my stomach now and less, proportionally, goes to my hips since there are fewer fat cells in that area now. so my silhouette retains its new shape!
the overall change is admittedly on the subtle side, since I'm pretty short and have wide hip bones (and you can't change your literal skeleton) but it's still gone a looooooong way. the main thing I requested from my surgeon was "I want to fit in men's pants" and boy did he deliver.
also a good place to note that if you're in the las vegas area looking for a plastic and/or cosmetic surgeon—this guy is board-certified in both btw—then I absolutely have the guy for you. feel free to DM me for details. lipo is clearly his specialty (and it shows!) but he also does a lot of breast revisions/mastopexy (i.e., fixing implants that other surgeons did a bad job putting in), regular implants, and face work (particularly facial feminization surgery). one thing that sold me on this guy was an enthusiastic yelp review from a local stripper who said he hid the incisions for her breast lift in her armpits so none of her clients would notice that she'd had work done... a true master of his craft
okay you've scrolled enough so I'll give you what you're here for lol. I don't have many pre-op pics because I was obviously unhappy with how I looked and was not taking full-body selfies on a regular basis, but here's a few I took ~2 weeks beforehand:
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these super thin men's joggers were my go-to dysphoria pants, to the point where I bought five pairs in different colors, but now they're so baggy on me that they have the opposite effect and make it look like I have wider hips than I do. so I retired them from my wardrobe...
...except not immediately because I had to wear compression garments 24/7 for the first three months post-op and these joggers were just loose enough to comfortably wear a medical girdle underneath them at all times, 110° degree temperatures be damned. (not that I was going out much for the first month since I was soooooooooooo fucking bruised and sore lol.) here's a few post-op pics in the same style pants:
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(first pic is less than 24 hours post-op, about to go to my follow-up appointment, looking greasy as fuck because I wasn't allowed to shower yet; second pic two days post-op and also post-shower, thankfully; third pic is about a month post-op.)
so, like, CLEAR improvement already. I will not be posting pictures of my black-and-blue-and-swollen-all-over legs but considering how puffy I was from getting internally pummeled with a cannula it's wild that I still saw improvement literally as soon as I came home.
recovery was obviously not a blast in the moment but I got off easy, all things considered. I was supposed to get drains put in and was Not looking forward to that at all lol. the first thing I asked when I woke up after surgery was "how many drains?" because they weren't sure if I'd end up needing two or four, but it turned out the answer was zero. no drains!!!
I did have to lie with my feet elevated for the first two weeks straight, and had major bruising that receded over the first month (you could barely see my regular skin underneath all the mottled spots), but little to no nerve pain, no weird complications, and I was more or less back to normal after six weeks. also noelle took very very good care of me and was brave about injecting me with blood thinners so I wouldn't get clots and die :)
when I went into it I was fully expecting to get huge vertical scars up and down the sides of my legs (and had made peace with it!) but instead I wound up with four tiny incisions like this, each less than two inches long:
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what's totally crazy is that the scars are basically Gone now. like even when I'm trying to find them I struggle to locate the ones in the front. I joked to noelle that if someone did an autopsy on me they might not figure out that I'd had cosmetic surgery, especially since the skin on my thighs is back to its normal color and texture. (in this scenario I like to imagine that it's dana scully giving me the autopsy and I'm in an x-files plot where instead of regular lipo I got alien lipo and mulder figures it out purely by accident.)
with lipo it can take up to a year to see the full results but I already feel so much fucking better in my body that seeing old pre-op pics throws me for a loop. and I can absolutely wear men's pants now—pants for short and stocky men, to be fair, but actual regular men's pants and not exclusively Pants For Men With Huge Butts And Legs. which is the only style I could even hope to fit in before. and even then it was a stretch.
big pic dump of shitty mirror selfies taken over the last few months:
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:)
(also I really debated sharing this one but I already included it in the yelp review I left my surgeon so fuck it: here's a tasteful before-and-after in my undies where you can see my bare legs for easier comparison. left pic is one week pre-op, right pic is about five months post-op. including it as a link instead of embedding it in the post in case your boss happens to be reading over your shoulder at this very moment. also this is the one and only time you will ever see me stripped down on tumblr dot com so don't get used to it lol.)
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pumpkin-patch-cat · 4 months
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New Job, Who Dis?!
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(Grim x Gender Neutral Reader)
Warnings:(DLC ending spoilers. Suggestive themes)
Grim is now living rent free in my brain.
After completing the DLC ending of A Date with Death, I have decided it is my favorite ending and conjured up a little dialog. This oneshot hints to the endings outcome, so spoiler warning ⚠️. This was written quickly, so pardon any grammatical errors! Enjoy!
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“Hold up, start from the top. What's my job description again?”
“Your job will be to give life back to those who aren't supposed to die. Sometimes, innocent people are caught up in things where losing their life was NOT part of the original plan. Because your soul harbors the essence of life itself, with you at my side, you'll be able to attempt to save those people who are at the presepist of dying too early.”
“Attempt?” You eye him quizzically from your place at your desk. Casper is sat at the foot of your bed, long legs outstretched, hands in his lap. He nods and continues.
“Basically, when a mortal is on the verge of death, their soul has become tainted with what we call a ‘blight’ or ‘blight of death’. Similar to ‘the taint’ for reapers, though much much harder to bounce back from when the soul or a mortals very existence is overtaken or ‘infected’ if you will. Some people can bounce back on their own, while others succumb and meet their unfortunate end. I say attempt because sometimes a mortal is beyond cleansing. The blight is too far gone, and no amount of divine intervention will save their existence....so naturally, when we, no, you receive cases like this, time is of the essence.
“I see...wow, that's heavy. No pressure or anything. Sheesh.”
“Yes. The job will be difficult at times. Y/n, there will be times when a person will be beyond help. You'll want to save them desperately. Times where no matter how much effort is placed into saving them, it may not work, and you will be angry. I can't tell you how many times I've witnessed an innocent person parish entirely too early at the hands of a twisted version of fate. Those moments are out of my hands, and I have to ferry them away regardless. But that's where you'll come in.” 
“Sooo I'm basically an angel??”
“No, they're grotesque creatures. They instill fear in humans and sugar coat their acts with pretty words. You'll actually give hope. Plus, you're much prettier than they are. Who really needs that many eyes and wings, honestly??? But anyways…”
You fall silent in deep thought.
“Y/n? Why are you screwing up your face like that?”
“Can I really do this, Casper? What if I mess up??”
“My sweetest, little nightmare. I'll be there with you every step of the way.” Casper smiles reassuringly.
“Thank God. OH! Do I get a cool ass scythe of my own, too?” You perk up almost immediately, wistfully looking at his impressive weapon that is currently leaning against your wall nearest the door.
“I...I'll never get used to the way you can flip subjects so easily. But yes, I guess. Once you're settled, we will get you fitted with a 'cool ass scythe'. Or at least a decent weapon you'll use to channel your soul energy. I know a guy.”
“You know a guy? That doesn't sound shady at all, but fuck yea!”
He chuckles softly at your enthusiasm.
“I'm glad you're okay with this decision. I really couldn't think of a better way for this to work out for both of us but-”
“But you have a big, sexy brain that was able to figure it out, now you're stuck with me foreeevvver.” You beam, triumphantly.
“I suppose I am, and quite frankly, I would have it no other way.” With a smile on his face, Casper stands, reaches for your hands, and pulls you to your feet.
“Awww, little reaper. Since when did you get so mushy? It makes me want to violate yo- I mean...I could really go for some food right about now. Yea, food. That's what I meant."
“...You really are something else. We will grab something on the way to my place.”
“Bet. Finally making good on us moving in together?”
“Obviously. I can't escape you.”
“It was inevitable, Casper”
“Seems so…and by the way…”
Casper slips his arm around your waist gently, leaning into your ear.
“I'll take you up on that offer of 'violating' me later, my little nightmare.”
“You just want to be stepped on.”
“S-stepped on? What..uh...I”
“The blush on your cheeks says you do. Can't take it back now. Your fate is sealed. I hope you're ready.” you wink.
“Haaa....fuck.”
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