#but not that kind of terf

[crtter]

#noticed this post was made by a TERF so get stolen idiot #and in case she sees this: ​if cats could understand the kind of hate you stand for they’d avoid you forever. you don’t deserve cats #animals #cats #eepy #seepy #eepying #iz sweepy #soooo eepy #kittens #sleepy

[sarasade]

One of the most generally useful things to come out of Hbomberguy's plagiarism video and Todd in the Shadows' similar video on misinformation is how they bring transparency to the internet phenomenon of "I made up a guy to get mad at".

Seriously, I've seen people make up a lot of stupid shit on the internet over the years and it's often just a manipulative attempt to paint a group of marginalized people in a bad light.

That's the TL;DR version of this post. 

ANYWAY here is the long version

Those videos are mostly about James Somerton's plagiarism of other queer people's work. However I'd like to talk about that 20-30% of Somerton's original writing- and oh boy. It's mostly about complaining about White Straight Women and misgendering well-known trans creators such as Rebecca Sugar and calling Becky Albertalli a straight woman while it's pretty common knowledge that she was forced to out herself as bi because she received so much harassment over "being a cishet woman who appropriates LGBT+ stories".

One thing that irks me especially is how in his Killing Stalking and Gay Shipping videos Somerton brings up how straight women/ teen girl shippers exploit gay men for their personal sexual fantasies. This gets brought up several times in his videos.

Being all up and arms about Somerton being a "White Cis Gay Who Hates Women and Queer People tm" is not that useful because the kind of rhetoric he's using is extremely common in fandom and LGBT+ spaces on Tumblr, TikTok and Twitter. We really don't need to bring Somerton's identity to this since he is in no way an unique example.

It's hypocritical to make this about an individual person when I've seen A TON of posts, tweets and videos where queer people talk about these Sinister Straight Women who are supposedly out there fetishizing and exploiting queer men. It's pretty clear to me that this is just an excuse to shit on women and queer people for having any sexual interests. At worst these comments are spreading misinformation about BL, a form of media that has been excessively studied by both Asian feminists and Asian queer women.

This all sounds really familiar and I think it's good that people are calling it out as what it is: misogyny and transphobia. I'd also point out the potentially racist motives behind being this hypervigilant about Asian media.

People can absolutely be misogynist regardless of gender or orientation. I really don't know why we need to create some kind of made up enemy to get mad at. I actually think it's almost sinister how "anti-fujoshi" people call Slash shippers and fujoshi misogynists or claim that they have internalised misogyny while being dismissive about women's interests and creative pursuits under Japanese obscenity laws, China's censorship, book bans in American schools and various other disadvances that are part of being a queer and/or female creator.

I think we shouldn't be naive about the bad faith actors who want to turn queer people against each other. For example Fujoshi.info mentions anti-gender (TERF, GC etc) movement using this kind of rhetoric as well.

Anyway if you want to read more:

- about the false info around BL fandom fujoshi.info

-There is the scholar Thomas Baudinette who studies gay media in Japan. Here is a podcast with him and the scholar Khursten Santos

-James Welker is a BL scholar as well. Here is a podcast interview about the new international BL article collection he edited.

-I've already talked about this Youtube channel by KrisPNatz and his great Killing Stalking video that actually engages with the themes of the manhwa

- There is also HR Coleman's thesis DO NOT FEED THE FETISHIZERS: BOYS LOVE FANS RESISTANCE AND CHALLENGE OF PERCEIVED REPUTATION where she interviews 36 BL fans and actually breaks down why fetishization has become such a huge talking point in the fandom discourse. Spoilers, it's mostly about young queer people and women being worried that they will get judged and pathologized for their interest in anything sexual.

-Great podcast about Danmei and censorship with Liang Ge

#Also I don't mean that you can always tell if someone is a transphobe or a TERF based on a couple of things they have said. #My point is that sometimes ok people can have very regressive ideas too. #This is not a call out post about how we should go around accusing anti-fujoshi people #todd in the shadows #hbomberguy #sarasade text #even I've got those “Fandom is mostly straight women fetishizing gay men” comments once and it begins to sound kind of passive-aggressive #when you're a bi woman. Lot of fandom stats at AO3 show that fandoms are montly bi women. who are these people calling straight exactly hmm #also straight women are completely ok leave them alone. I know I know Yes I'm so brave for saying this #cw: transphobia

[pinkcarabiner]

hey quick reminder/psa!!!! if you shame lesbians for previously having sex/dating men you can genuinely go fuck yourself!!! not everyone figures out every part of their identity when they're 15 and we live in a heteronormative society that TELLS a lot of us that we have to date/be attracted to/marry men. a lot of us grow up in places/communities/families and where expression of our sexuality isn't safe and are taught that our identity is wrong and bad. so if you're going to shame lesbians who have previously slept with men, take your lesbophobia elsewhere and leave my friends and my community alone!!!!

#literally shut up #also a lot of this kind of shit ties directly into terf rhetoric

[genderkoolaid]

If having sex without attraction is enjoyable, isn't it fucked up not to have sex with someone you care for? Some of my guy friends wanted to have sex with me and said no because I wasn't attracted to them and they stopped being friends with me. So now I'm. Idk. I ruined my friendships because I was told sex w/o attraction is unhealthy, but apparently I could've kept them... I feel so shitty, some of those guys were desperately trying to lose their virginity & I denied them for no reason 😕

Something being potentially enjoyable and not inherently unhealthy does not mean it is something you have to do. It can be enjoyable and healthy to go sky-diving with your friends, that does not mean you have to or that, if your friends break up with you because you refuse to go sky-diving with them, that you have done something wrong by not wanting to. Just because some people find it enjoyable doesn't mean you will, and just because it can be healthy doesn't mean it always is, especially if you feel like you have to do it to keep your friends.

You don't have to view sex without attraction as inherently unhealthy to not want to have sex with people you are not attracted to. If someone tells you that "sex without attraction is healthy so if you don't fuck me, you are an asshole" they are making a completely illogical point to manipulate you because they are both an asshole and bad at arguments.

#im assuming this ask is genuine altho it does kind of feel like bait #given that ive talked about aspec relationships in the past & TERFs are weird about that shit #m. #ask box

[limethechef]

Let people be happy for who they are ffs

#jschlatt #transmasc #limethechef #no seriously #it’s disgusting #fuck terfs #let people live #live happily #kindness costs nothing #I’d let him hit tbh

[public-trans-it]

i was a trans man until after a lot of build up of doubting myself, i finally realized that we are putting ourselves further into boxes by not accepting that we are the biological sex that we are and we can do WHATEVER we want at the same time.

clothes and makeup and certain interests do not equal gender.

and not liking being a woman is an unfortunately natural symptom of puberty and/or experiencing society’s deeply ingrained misogyny. and everyone deserves support for those problems.

but we can all fight together against gender social constructs in a healthy way without prescribing people hormones and invasive cosmetic surgery to make them more like the sex they “should” be according to… social constructs…. and help them be comfortable in who they are

Alright. Its been like 9 fucking months that I have been staring down this ask. What better time than to give TERFs some nuance than right in the middle of a fucking hate campaign going on where people (well... singular person probably) are calling me a TERF. This wont backfire.

This post arrived in my inbox shortly after I made another post about gender, and just how fucking weird it can be, and how I genuinely believed every single person on this planet has a fascinating relationship with gender, and so much nuance and personal identity in theirs. Even cis people. Even TERFs. In the tags, I even begrudgingly encouraged TERFs to talk about their gender on that post if they wanted. I genuinely think that TERFs do have really cool relationships with gender. As I mentioned in those tags, the quickest way to explode a group of TERFs is to get them to start talking about their own relationships with gender, and see how vastly different it is, and watching them stab each other in the back over it. So I told them to ramble away about how they view gender, as long as they stayed the fuck away from the rest of the blog WHICH THIS ANON CLEARLY FUCKING IGNORED.

But... this anon does bring up another topic I want to talk about.

Detransition.

Read More

I am a huge supporter of detransitioning. This is... surprisingly... not a very common stance in the trans community, and it breaks my fucking heart. Like, I get it. I understand why. A LOT of detransitioners, like the person in this ask, end up weaponizing their feelings of gender against other trans people.

My support of transition comes from the intersection of two very central beliefs of mine:

Everyone should explore their gender without feeling a need to commit! This is a pretty common belief in the trans community! Damn near universal in fact! We even have a fun little term we use for people who decide to play around with gender, only to end up a bit closer to where they started and being perfectly happy with that: Cis+. Someone who is cis, but at least put in the work to understand the trans experience, and actually CHOOSE to remain Cis instead of just defaulting to it with societal pressure. Many trans people are much more comfortable around 'Cis+' people, because they know these are people who have taken the time and put in the work of being an ally. Self examination isn't easy, especially not publicly, and doing so is genuinely one of the strongest ways a Cis person could ever show their support.

It is never too late to transition. This is also a pretty common belief in the trans community! It is... sadly not quite as universal though. But it is something very important that needs to be said. You could be 80 years old, sitting in a retirement home, and go "You know what? I think I'd rather wear a dress and be treated like a lady. I don't want to be buried as a man." And I think every single trans person should have that freedom!

I was discussing this with @thydungeongal the other day, far more paraphrased than this post, and she said something incredible that has been knocking around in my head ever since.

"Gender is an ongoing process"

Those five words they said to me sum up my feelings far more than this entire post could. Gender IS an ongoing process. My gender has changed SO MUCH over the past three decades. From the straightjacket of assigned gender that I was once forced into; to the very stylish and still lovable finely tailored suit of femininity that grew a little too stuffy to wear constantly, even though I do still enjoy it and try it on from time to time; to the wonderful and freeing losely fitting clothing of being aegogender, finally feeling free to be myself and just act naturally and feel natural without having to keep up an appearance!

And I think, there is no length of time you can try out being trans, and trying out new genders, before eventually coming to the realization you were cis all along. Even if you started HRT. Even if you got SRS. Heck, I don't even think you should have to call yourself trans to do either of those things in the first place, why would I be upset that someone did them and then realized they weren't trans? No single moment in your life should EVER lock your gender in place into some unchanging, set in stone thing.

So I support detransitioners completely, with my entire heart. They deserve just as much support as every other 'Cis+' person out there.

So anon, while many people may hate you and lash out at you for detransitioning, I want you to know, that I am not one of them. It sounds like your detransition might have been forced by peer pressure, which is heart breaking to hear. No one should ever force their own gender expectations on another. I hope that wasn't the case. I hope you came to the decision yourself, after realizing whats right for you. I will never give you hate for your detransition.

I WILL ABSOLUTELY GIVE YOU HATE FOR BEING A FUCKING TERF THOUGH. YOUR OWN EXPERIENCE WITH GENDER DOES NOT GIVE YOU THE RIGHT TO POLICE THE GENDER OF OTHERS, FUCK OFF. GET THE FUCK OFF MY BLOG, YOU PIECE OF SHIT!

#I think I'm gonna start doing that for Read Mores #so you can find your place easier after click it #since my 'style' in these long posts is like... a fairly longish NON-readmore post. followed by the actual readmore. Let me know if it work #text essay #gender #detransition #I uh... also have some more... complex feelings of detransitioning #that may be a LIIIIIIITTLE more controversial......... #none of it goes against what i said here #its more personal stuff with my own gender and how detransition specifically is something that exists not as gender itself #but as the societal perceptions of a persons gender #but thats a more complex topic that I'll add on to this at another date #also I am absolutely taking this ask at face value for the sake of this post #but I am not so naive as to believe that the blatant TERF that sent it was being genuine #this is ABSOLUTELY the kind of thing they send people to drive a wedge in the community #I'm not even going to fucking dignify that part of it with any mention in the body of this post #edit: ........... okay the readmore accidentally moved somehow #I fixed it now though

[acowardinmordor]

Fucked up thought as I do material spec: transmasc Eddie Munson who gets bullied and called a guy because of how he dresses and acts (transphobic so bad they looped back to what Eddie wants on accident) dating Steve post S2, who knows and supports him, but still has to misgender his bf in public until they can get out of Hawkins. Eddie fails again, they get in a fight about whether they should leave, and aren’t broken up, but aren’t really together as S3 starts. So when Eddie visits Scoops, Steve is so happy to see him that he calls him Eddie and he/him in public, just like the bullies, and can’t explain to Robin, who is absolutely pissed that Steve is treating her Eddie like that.

#steddie #I always love when Steve is *processing confusion* : immediate support #Eddie wants to be called Eddie? sure thing #‘what’s trans?’ Steve’s not sure #but that’s his boyfriend eddie #who he has to call his girlfriend #because his boyfriend asked him to #also don’t @ me #the shit you do to stay safe in unsafe areas is ridiculous #also there’s a weird confluence of feminism and trans experience #that predates terfs #where feminists were advocating for a woman’s right to wear pants #and have short hair and muscles #to be typically male looking without being less of a woman #so in 85 Robs first thought is probably to defend Eddie’s right to be any kind of woman

[daftpatience]

im no good at making memes but here this is a useful image i made for when you see those kinds of posts circulating

#those kinds as in like memes from terfs that vaguely reference womanhood or lesbianism that is soured from the source being a terf #i dont wanna see no red names on my dash cmon guys #everyone thats tagging it sayin ur on mobile. im sorry for ur loss

[knowledgequeenabc]

Helpful info I found being mocked by terfs, because they refuse to take antisemitism seriously. (Naturally). Go on and spread this version, please

#hogwarts legacy #harry potter #antisemitism #terfs don't touch #and if you do I'm manifesting your house blowing up I want nothing to do with your kind. #if you are a r*df*m and you interact with me in any way whatsoever I hope you trip and shatter every bone in your body.

[mintharasthrone]

more “gay” pages posting complete homophobic garbage claiming bisexual women are lesbians

#tra homophobia #drop the t & b #of course there’s a comment calling us actual lesbians trans/biphobic 🙄 #all lesbians are terfs bc homosexuality is only real if a woman is a feminist or political like what kind of homophobic logic #they think they’re so different than het men who argue all lesbians aren’t real and want a male and piv #the obsession with also equating toys to wanting a man is never ending #and i remember the poll here that showed most lesbians of course want to eat pussy most of all #and bi women wanted to use toys #like lesbians don’t want anything that looks like a dick when they have sex only bi women do and i know from experience #why the fuck would we #i wish people would stop fucking obsessing over and disecting how lesbians have sex and why #they always have to make it about males and dick #it’s socially acceptable to make creepy perverted comments always talking about or mocking lesbian sex #bi women are like why do lesbians hate us? you literally are with whole ass men calling yourselves lesbians and dykes and bonding over how #much you hate real lesbians and insinuating we aren’t real and can be fixed with conversion #therapy #people hate us so deeply for loving only women and only the female anatomy #they genuinely believe we can’t be happy being homosexuals and bring up toys as some kind of proof #the same people who can’t make women come unlike us

[dashedwithromance]

thinking about how dracula, at its core, is a queer novel that bleeds with loneliness. we don’t know how bram stoker would identity if he had access to modern terminology and contemporary views on sexuality as an identity rather than a sexual preference (and i don’t think we should know), but queer is super useful term here

and dracula, a novel about a monster who passes his infection on through blood, published two years after oscar wilde’s terribly public, terribly dangerous trial for sodomy, in a time where it was fresh knowledge that STD’s could be passed through blood… i mean, it feels disingenuous to the source material to ignore the terror steeped in the novel like that.

this is a book that revolves around the presence of and the physical lack of sex, that features a single man of his kind so monstrous he cannot say holy words or stand the touch of consecrated things, or even see himself in the mirror… it echoes such a terrible, tortured loneliness echoed in a lot of queer work and gothic in general (and the two very often overlap). the idea of being the only one of your kind, or at least, feeling like the only one, in a world that actively hunts you

#terfs don’t even fucking look at this post #but dracula IS queer at its core #dracula #daily dracula #bram stoker #thinking about stoker’s letter to walt whitman… ‘my kind’ #and of course there are other fears present in the novel - racial anxieties and fears of immigration and fin de siècle fears etc #and those readings don’t necessary counteract a queer reading and vice versa #okay to reblog (💚) #queer

[ot3]

imo if you're trying to discuss the concept of Sexual Orientations and you kind of need to come at it from the understanding that, at least in the Western World there isn't really a concept of sexual orientation or sexual deviance that isn't categorically reliant upon gender expectations to make sense of. concepts like sodomy, like homosexuality and bisexuality, are constructed entirely by the gender-based ways that people are expected to perform their sexuality. see: the way inversion theory was the prelude for a lot of academic understanding of sexual identity and how echoes of that continue into the modern day. this isn't really a hot take or anything i just feel like its a nuance a lot of discussions are missing.

#which is part of why terfs are so fucking stupid. although this post isnt about terfs #and part of what i feel like is missing from some of the framework around asexuality. although this post is not about asexuality either. #and part of why i think bi lesbian discourse is kind of stupid on both sides. even though this post is not about bi lesbians #although i might make a post about that. because i have some thoughts in my head Cooking that i want to try to sort out at some point

[terven-queen]

terfs make me ashamed to be a woman tbh.

Why though? Terfs are seriously the BEST women. They awe me by being so brilliant, articulate, brave, funny, compassionate, knowledgeable, wise, etc. I am so so blessed to share this world with them.

Radical feminists seriously just want to make this world a better place for women and girls… what the hell is so horrible about that?

#asks #thanks for the ask even though it was kind of a troll one #I’m still happy to answer lol #radblr #radical feminism #radfem #TERFS MAKE ME PROUD TO BE A WOMAN

[feral-radfem]

Hey, do y'all think we could stop doing the following:

Post about sex-based injustice women in foreign countries are facing.

UK/USA Radfems: So how is the trans crowd going to pretend sex doesn't exist now??!??!

These posts are important for radical feminism on their own, without connection to the trans issue. We make plenty of posts about the damages of denying the sexes' existences, one that better address that particular issue with plenty of fitting example of sex-based oppression.

However, that is not the only goal of radical feminism and I'm sure it comes across as dismissive and performative to non-UK/USA Radfems when we only use their issues to point out sex based oppression exist. Especially when we have local examples of sex-based oppression in the UK/USA at our disposal.

The issues that are affecting the women in those areas are worthy of being talked about and taken seriously without any association with gender critical arguments. We should work harder at not using them as tokens, but rather realize that they are real women with their own societal misogyny that deserves the same respect and consideration we afford to western feminists.

#lily responds #radical feminism #radfems please touch #terfs please interact #radical feminists please touch #radical feminist #radical feminist theory #radfem lesbian #there are so many good informative posts that I want to reblog but this kind of dismissive commentary is littered in the reblogs #making it impossible to pass around this info without also contributing to being dismissive of the actual issue that we are discussing

[cemeterything]

hi sorry to bother but that post about bein sad when a book ends is by a massive terf :/ which is too bad because it’s very funny.

:( you're not being a bother dw, thanks for letting me know.

url is @/moondrunklesbian for anyone who wants to block

#as always with these kinds of posts i did check the account myself and op is a terf unfortunately

[blueskittlesart]

not to be dramatic but it really is beginning to feel like there isn’t a single safe place on the internet for trans people anymore. 2 years ago i could post something about trans pride and have nothing but positivity in my notes but this year i end up fending off terfs for the crime of a post where i called a fictional character trans getting more than 5k. tumblr used to be a safe haven from this shit. it’s disturbing to see the flood of terfs to this website and the way staff openly refuses to do anything about them. there’s only so much i can do when half the fucking userbase wants me dead. its tiring & i wish staff would fucking do better

#sorry i know this is depressing but like. tumblr kind of feels like the last line of defense to me here yknow #like if i can’t call a character trans on tumblr i can’t do it anywhere. we have lost. #sigh. anyways block every terf you see with reckless abandon freeze them out or whatever bc staff clearly fucking won’t #personal #transphobia