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#but no there's like creepy horror movie sirens instead
madreemeritus · 6 months
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POTO adaptations analysis — Part 1 — The Phantom of the Opera (1925), by Rupert Julian, starring Lon Chaney and Mary Philbin
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I will list the positive and negative points of which midia and give a score at the end (remember this is MY OPINION)
Positive points:
– this movie has a lot of different soundtracks, but my favorite is Gabriel Thibaudeau's. His Don Juan Triumphant piece is simply fantastic
– the casting couldn't be more perfect, even if Raoul and Christine were blonde in the original novel, the actors still give an amazing performance for their characters. Mary Philbin and Lon Chaney as the two main holes are the best thing of this movie
– it's extremely Leroux accurate. Sure, they needed to explain the events as fast as they could because it's a silent movie of less than 2 hours, but it still captures the atmosphere of the novel
– the scenarios are amazing and they were made specifically for this movie (no, they didn't go to the actual Opera Garnier, it was all built!), specially Erik's lair which is amazing
– can we apreciate more the unmasking scene? Aside from the acting and direction that are already great, the scene is both frightening and tragic, it makes you sympathize for both Christine and Erik in that situation
– the figurine of this movie is speechless. Although i miss Christine's black dominó, but it's still accurate to the characters and the 19th century
– aside from horror and romance, this movie also includes the comedy scenes that the original novel had
– the chandelier scene was pretty difficult to simulate back in 1925 yet they still managed to do it realistically 👌🏼
– Erik's hand gestures and expressions 🥹 it's a whole movie by himself
– THE RED DEATH OMG his red cape in a black-and-white scenario is just 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼
– Erik's make-up is obviously the best thing about this movie. Lon Chaney made it all himself, his work is still the most accurate and realistic deformity
– they included the Grasshopper and Scorpion scene
– Erik's lion alarm is so cute (not sure of how it works but anyway)
– the scene where Erik enters the lake as the Siren is so fucking perfect, really it's weird and cute the same time (and seeing wet Erik honestly makes me wetter than the Count's corpse)
– the scene where Erik leads Christine to his lair for the first time is the sweetest scene ever, he is so sympathetic and trying his best to make her comfortable
– also; the Don Juan was written out of the love he had for Christine. She was his inspiration 🥹 he wrote it for her!!
– DAROGA IS HEREalthogh he is a white man and has no relationship with Erik butAND HIS NAME IS LEDOUX
Negative points:
– instead of the love triangle, Raoul and Christine are just lovers since the beginning of the movie and it obviously makes him more "sympathetic" (even if he's useless and has creepy behaviours such as hiding in her dressing room to spy on her)
– Erik directly and shamelessly threatens to kill Christine in the unmasking scene? No, why??
– Christine has little to no agency here, and the rooftop scene makes her much more unsympathetic, she wasn't so petty in the novel even in the Apollo's Lyre
– the ending. Obvious that nonsense angry mob that discovered Erik's lair out of a miracle was included after the original ending was changed. It's just nonsense and cruel and takes away the redemption that Erik needed, like if the original message didn't even exist
Movie score: 8/10 🌕🌕🌕🌕🌗
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ungusthebungus · 6 months
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The Police Are Coming (Sebastian Debeste & F OC)
Rating: T
Fandom: Ace Attorney
Relationship: Sebastian Debeste & F OC
Characters: Sebastian Debeste, F OC
Additional Tags: Breaking and Entering, School, Police
Summary:
Annie's teacher gives her an F on a paper. Pissed and annoyed, she breaks into Themis Academy to change her grade and Sebastian tags along.
Annie was usually such a good student. That’s why she was surprised to find out that one of her test scores was a bit low. It didn’t help that the teacher hated her guts for no reason, but that wasn’t an excuse to decrease her score. That asshole must have deliberately changed her grade from an A to an F.
As she turned the doorknob to one of the side doors of Themis Academy, she heard her partner in crime, Sebastian, gulp loudly. “Shush! Do you want us to get caught?” Annie asked him. He shook his head quickly and followed her into the dark hallway.
“I don’t even know why I’m here with you.” He grumbled. As he was sneaking behind her, he accidentally knocked over a bucket. The sound of the bucket hitting the floor echoed through the hallway, causing her to turn around and glare at him.
“Dude, seriously?! Be more careful.” She warned him and proceeded to walk through the empty halls of the school. Finally, she reached her classroom, so she turned the handle to the door and stepped in.
Being at Themis Academy was really weird at night. There were no students here having debates. Although Sebastian was here with her, he was usually more obnoxious and talkative during the daytime. A faint light from the moon shined through the window, but otherwise the room was pitch black, giving off a creepy horror movie aesthetic.
“My dad’s going to flip out.” He whined as he helped Annie search through the teacher’s desk. Although she found many other students’ papers, she somehow couldn’t find hers. She picked up one that accidentally fell on the floor and glanced at the name.
“How did you get a goddamn A?” She asked him, resisting the urge to crumple up the paper. He was as dumb as a rock. She faintly remembered his prosecutor dad, Blaise, and concluded that he must be bribing Sebastian’s teachers. That is the only possible reason.
As she put Sebastian’s paper down, she thought she heard sirens in the distance. “But there weren’t any alarms…” Annie said, heart rate rising from the thought of being arrested. She nodded her head towards the window, hoping that Sebastian would keep an eye out.
He raced to the window and she saw his face go pale. “Sebastian, what’s wrong?” She questioned, frantically shoving papers back into the desk.
He turned to Annie, his ahoge standing straight up like an exclamation point instead of a question mark. “The police are coming.”
Note: Redo of an older fic. Please let me know if you want me to tag something.
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approximateknowledge · 11 months
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An only vaguely coherent rant/lamentation about an isekai from the mid-2010s
So, context: little egg me got into anime within the context of the isekai-boom of the first half of the 2010s, and the first anime I actually watched (that wasn't something like the Dutch tv dubs of beyblade and pokemon) was, in fact, an isekai; SAO, to be precise, and the reason was litterally just gender envy towards femme Kirito in the second series. This rant is not about SAO.
It's about No Game No Life. NGNL has, to put it lightly, issues. The biggest one by far being the creepy and very uncomfortable, uhmm, situation the 2 main characters have going on. It gets bad to the point of being unwatchable on multiple occasions and it's completely undefendable. I hate it.
The thing is, if it was just a crappy creepy isekai, I wouldn't care. But the issue is, the worldbuilding and concepts in this story are genuinely inspired. The fact the 10 Pledges are equivalent to Laws of physics in-context is such a great concept, expecially in how it interacts with all the different sentient species.
The weird symbiosis of the dhampir and sirens in a world where non-consensual violence is physically impossible, the double-edged sword of magic as a method of cheating, the way structural violence, all the way up to inheritable slavery, can still exist despite the pledges.
And my personal brainworm, the flügel. Immortal beings made for eternal war stuck in a world where war has become ontologically impossible. Living forces of destruction in a universe where all of that became meaningless. They're teleologically made to go apeshit and the fundamentally can't anymore. Beings without purpose, and with an eternity ahead of them. So what do they do? They gather knowledge and stories and whatever else just to not be bored. They become archivists and collectors and they learn all there is to lear nto fill the unfillable hole in their existence. They're escapists.
My younger self was positively obsessed with them. I unironically made a flügel-sona (her name was Ëzisheill). I still think the flügel are fascinating as a concept. Living weapons of a god long-rendered powerless, in a world were the concept of a weapon has been refuted by the very laws of physics. They deserved better. Most of the concepts did.
Even after almost a decade, I'm still so frustrated at how this thing manages to be so fascinating on a conceptual level and so utterly garbage in most aspects of its execution.
I don't recommend ngnl to anyone; it's creepy and horny in way too many places and all the wrong ways.
But I wish I could. I wish it was actually good instead of "like that".
Alas
(the Zero movie is actually good, but because it takes place *before* the Pledges it doesn't have the most interesting worldbuilding dynamics. I do recommend the movie though. Mainly because it isn't isekai at all and mainly just a somewhat post-apocalyptic dark fantasy/cosmic horror story for the most part. And the anime mcs aren't there, thank fuck, and the main couple of the movie actually works without being horrendously uncomfortable and disgusting.)
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best books with morally ambiguous narrators!
all y’all’s problematic faves and villains! :) also included are third person narrators but in books with morally ambiguous leads/themes 
Sci-fi
Scythe by Neal Shusterman: in a future free from pain, disease, and war, people can live forever. ‘scythes’ are given the power to decide who lives and who dies to preserve the balance. sad and kinda gives of hunger games vibes, if you like that.
Neuromancer by William Gibson: basically invented the cyberpunk genre. strange and removed protagonists. (a team of computer hackers have to face off against an evil AI). you kind of dislike everyone and suddenly you’re crying over them. one of those trippy sci-fi classics.
The Sirens of Titan by Kurt Vonnegut: very beautiful and very very sad (same author as slaughterhouse five). the richest man in america has to face a martian invasion. more about free will and bad people doing good things than a plot that makes any kind of sense.
The Man in the High Castle by Philip K Dick: set in an alternate universe where the germans and japanese won world war two. not really like the tv show at all- it’s not an action story, and there’s not really the hope to somehow fix the world that drives a lot of dystopia stories. instead its about how people survive and connect to one another in a hopeless society.
The Scorpion Rules by Erin Bow: a supercomputer convinces the leaders of the world to keep the peace for hundreds of years by taking their children hostage and obliterating any city that disobeys. what happens to the hostage protagonists when war seems inevitable? lots of morally fraught decisions and characters slowly losing their identity. (plus a fun lesbian romance)
Cryptonomicon by Neal Stephenson: a brilliant mathematician and a dedicated marine fight to keep the ultra secret in world war two. fifty years later,  a tech company discovers what remains of their story. one of the most memorable sequences in the book is a japanese soldier slowly becoming disillusioned with his nation and horrified by the war even as he continues to fight.
Blade Runner by Philip K. Dick: another one of those sci-fi classics that’s not at all like the movie. there is a bounty hunter for robots, though, as well as a weird religion that probably is referencing catholicism and a decaying society with a shortage of pets. kind of a trip.
Wilder Girls by Rory Power: girls trapped in a boarding school on an isolated island must face a creeping rot that affects the animals and plants on the island as well as their own bodies. the protagonists will do anything to survive and keep each other safe. very tense (and bonus lesbian romance whoo)
The Fifth Season by N K Jemisin: three women are gifted with the ability to control the earth’s energy in a world where those who can do so are forced into hiding or slavery. some veryyyy dark choices here but lots of strong female characters.
Historical Fiction
Fingersmith by Sarah Waters: two victorian lesbians fall in love as they plot to betray each other in horrific ways. lots of plot twists, plucky thieves, gothic settings, and a great romance.
Quo Vadis by Henryk Sienkiwicz: a powerful roman soldier in the time of Nero plots to kidnap a young woman after he falls in love with her, only to learn more about the mysterious christian religion she follows. very melodramatic but some terrific prose. 
All the Light We Cannot See by Anthony Doerr: a blind girl in France and a brilliant German boy recruited by the military struggle through the chaos of the second world war. ends with a bang (iykyk.) very sad, reads like poetry.
Boxers by Gene Luen Yang: graphic novel reveals the story of a young boy fighting in the boxer rebellion in early twentieth century china. the sequel, saints, is also excellent. beautifully and sympathetically shows the protagonist’s descent into evil- the reader really understands each step along the way.
Fantasy
Three Dark Crowns by Kendare Blake: three triplets separated at birth, each with their own magical powers, have to fight to the death to gain the throne. lots of fun honestly
Six of Crows and Crooked Kingdom by Leigh Bardugo: everyone in these books is highly problematic but you love them all anyway. a ragtag game of criminals plan a heist on a magical fortress. some terrific tragic back stories, repressed feelings, and revenge schemes.
The Dark Tower series by Stephen King: idk how to describe these frankly but if you can put up with King’s appalling writing of female characters they’re pretty interesting. fantasy epic about saving the world/universe, sort of. cowboys and prophecies and overlapping dimensions and drug addicts galore.
The Amulet of Samarkand by Jonathan Stroud: lots of fun! a twelve year old decides to summon a demon for his cute lil revenge scheme. sarcastic demon narrator. lighthearted until s*** gets real suddenly.
Elegy and Swansong by Vale Aida: fantasy epic with machiavellian lesbians and enemies to lovers to enemies to ??? to lovers. charming and exciting and lovely characters.
The False Prince by Jennifer Nielsen: an orphan boy must compete with a few others for the chance to impersonate a dead prince. really dark but very tense and exciting and good twists.
The Grace of Kings by Ken Liu: fantasy epic. heroes overthrow an evil empire and then struggle as the revolution dissolves into warring factions. interesting world building and three dimensional characters, even if they only have a small part.
Circe by Madeline Miller: the story behind the witch who turns men into pigs in the odyssey. madeline miller really said, i just used my classics degree to write a beautiful gay love story and now im going to write a powerful feminist retelling because i can. queen. an amazing and satisfying book that kills me a lil bit because of the two lines referencing the song of achilles.
Heartless by Marissa Meyer: the tragic backstory for the queen of hearts in alice in wonderland. a little predictable but very fun with a compelling protagonist
A Song of Ice and Fire (Game of Thrones) by George RR Martin: ok I know we all hate GRRM and rightfully so but admittedly these books do have some great characters and great scenes. they deserve better than GRRM though. also he will probably never finish the books anyway....
A Series of Unfortunate Events by Lemony Snicket: not really fantasy but not really anything else either. plucky, intelligent, and kind children fight off evil plots for thirteen books until suddenly you realize the world is not nearly as black and white as you thought. 
Classics
Rebecca by Daphne du Maurier: gothic romance!! a new wife is curious about the mysterious death of her predecessor in a creepy old house in the British countryside...good twists and lovely prose.
A Separate Peace by John Knowles: not really morally ambiguous but one awful decision suddenly has awful consequences and certain people are haunted by guilt forever.... really really really beautiful and really really really sad. boys in a boarding school grow up together under the shadow of world war two.
Anna Karenina by Leo Tolstoy: while imperial russia slowly decays a beautiful young woman begins a destructive affair. a long book. very russian. the ending is incredibly tense and well written.
Lord of the Flies by William Golding: I think you know the plot to this one. the prose is better than you remember and the last scene is always exciting.
And Then There Were None by Agatha Christie: one by one, the guests on an island are slowly picked off. one of Christie’s darkest mysteries- no happy ending here! very tense and great twists.
Contemporary
The Secret History by Donna Tartt: inspired the whole dark academia aesthetic. college students get a little too into ancient greece and it does not end very well. lovely prose but I found the characters unlikable.
Honorable Mentions
The Dublin Saga by Edward Rutherford: has literally a billion protagonists, but some of them are morally ambiguous ig? follows a few families stories’ from the 400s ad to irish independence in the 20s. beautifully captures the weight and movement of irish history.
Artemis Fowl by Eoin Colfer: how morally ambiguous can you be if you’re, like, eleven? a lot if you’re a criminal genius who wants to kidnap a fairy for your evil-ish plan apparently!
Redemption by Leon Uris: literally my favorite novel ever. the sequel to Trinity but can stand alone. various irish families struggle through the horrors of world war one. the hero isn’t really morally ambiguous, but the main theme of the novel is extremely bad people suddenly questioning their choices and eventually redeeming themselves. sweeping themes of love, screwed up families, redemption, and patriotism.
The Lymond Chronicles and House of Niccolo by Dorothy Dunnett: heroes redeem themselves/try to get rich/try to save their country in early renaissance Europe. if I actually knew what happened in these books I'm sure it would be morally ambiguous but its too confusing for me. in each book you spend at least a third convinced the protagonist is evil, though. lots of exciting sword fights, tragic romances, plot twists, and kicking english butt.
Bonus: Protagonist is less morally ambiguous and more very screwed up and sad all the time
The Goldfinch by Donna Tartt: you know this one bc its quoted in all those quote compilations. basically the story of how one horrible event traumatizes a young man and how he develops a connection to a painting. really really really good.
Never Let Me Go by Kazuo Ishiguro: hard to describe but strange... not an action novel or a dystopia really but sort of along those lines. very hopeless.
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khrsecretvalentine · 5 years
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KHR Summer Exchange 2019 for @khrkin
Notes: KHR Secret Summer Holidays 2019! For Fran (@khrkin), who asked for terrible comedy and found-family (and 1827, which I unfortunately didn’t manage, sorry ;o;). 
 From @kyogre-blue to @khrkin
~.~.~ 
  The Special Investigation, Containment, and Discipline Committee, Namimori branch, was supposed to investigate, contain and punish supernatural crimes — hauntings, possessions, curses, use of magic in illegal affairs, as well as monster attacks. Ghostbusters, pseudo government version, basically. Sawada Tsunayoshi, terrified out of his mind, had received a full course of training on all those things during new hire orientation… the “orientation” that was just a shaky home-made video and a powerpoint slide with clipart zooming onto the screen. 
  Anyway, apparently all those scary things did exist. 
  However, dealing with them… was not what they actually did, day to day. In his three months at the Committee, Tsuna hadn’t seen a single supernatural thing outside of his coworkers. 
  He had seen a distressingly high number of stalkers, serial killers and scammers though. 
“Don’t worry, Tsuna-kun!” Sasagawa Kyoko, the secretary, receptionist and nanny of the team, comforted him when he tried to bring up the subject. “It’s summer now, and we’ll have more real work. Summer is the season for seances and ghost stories, after all. That’ll stir up the spirits. Lots of people going exploring too, in all kinds of places, waking up all kinds of things… I’m sure it’ll pick up soon!” 
  That wasn’t comforting. 
  …Let’s start at the beginning. 
  Sawada Tsunayoshi, also known as Dame Tsuna, age 18, had completely bombed every university entrance exam he’d taken — as expected. His middle school crush Kyoko found him crying behind the school building on graduation day, completely without future prospects. With the kindness that had made him fall for her in the first place, she gave him her handkerchief and listened to his sobbed complaints. 
  “It’s okay, Tsuna-kun,” she said, after he calmed down. “I know a place that’s always looking for people!” 
  That place was the Special Investigation, Containment, and Discipline Committee, Namimori branch. 
  Kyoko and her brother Ryohei had been recruited after they ended up involved in a supernatural incident. It wasn’t a kind of “you know about us, so now you must join” thing. They could have forgotten all about it and gone home to their normal lives. Although the Committee did not have anything as nice as actual memory alteration, they did have a substance that could blur recent memories, which was given to most witnesses. 
  Ryohei refused. Punching ghosts or whatever was apparently too exciting. And Kyoko followed his lead. 
  Frankly speaking, Tsuna hadn’t really believed in this stuff. He figured that this was the designated ‘loser’ group that was changed with wild goose chases and hoaxes — someone had to deal with the citizens calling in hauntings and such, after all, even if it all turned out to be squeaky windows and leaking pipes in the end. 
  Most importantly, it was a job that didn’t care about his qualifications and didn’t require any competence test. As long as he could escape being an unemployed waste upon society, Tsuna would take anything. 
  He… did not expect his boss to beat him up on the first day, or one of his coworkers to have a shape-shifting bamboo sword that could cut through sheets of solid steel. Or the weird foreign kid, who might have been a coworker but Tsuna wasn’t sure, to be able to generate lightning out of nowhere. Or his other, other coworker who may or may not have been possessed. 
  But it was still a job. Tsuna would take anything, including all that. 
  The current job market was scarier than any ghost. 
  …Probably. Final judgement pending actually seeing a ghost. 
~.~.~ 
  Just as Kyoko said, summer was the season of ghost stories and seances. What this meant was that the police, the fire department and sometimes even government agencies that didn’t like naming themselves would transfer over cases from concerned citizens who were absolutely sure they were being haunted by the spirit of their great-grandfather, a jilted office lady who hung herself at the abandoned building a block over, or a famous serial killer. (Why did people like trying to call up the ghost of Jack the Ripper so much anyway?) 
  Kyoko and Yamamoto, the only two employees with basic social skills, were on the phone without rest, using their friendliest, most soothing voices. Meanwhile, Tsuna and Ryohei were given links to videos of exorcism ceremonies and some very realistic looking Shinto priest robes, sewn up by their intern Haru. Thus equipped, they became… con artists on a government salary. 
  Gokudera had also been offered a costume, but he insisted on trying to prove the concerned citizens’ worries unfounded through the power of science — even if Gokudera’s idea of science included “energy fields” that could not be detected by modern instruments, which left “imprints” that carried an “echo of the deceased’s biopatterns” blah blah, and other things that sounded no less creepy than just calling it a haunting. 
  Gokudera’s success rate dropped to an all new low, along with his salary. 
  It was the usual combination of dumb job and crazy coworkers, just in sweltering heat. 
  And then, Tsuna tried to perform an… exorcism (scam) at the new Nonohana Building downtown. 
  The building had been suffering from a number of creepy rumors, which came to a head when several bored employees had a few too many drinks after working overtime, did a seance (of course), and then ended up in the hospital one by one after mysterious accidents (of course). 
  “Na-mo-ta-mo-ra-su-ro…” Tsuna chanted pure nonsense while walking through the motions roughly approximating an exorcism. The paper ropes at the end of his stick rustled as he swung it back and forth. Nearby, the building owner and several other figures in business suits watched with expressions ranging from worry to desperate hope to outright boredom. One of them was filming with her cellphone. Tsuna sweated a little more than usual, under the heavy priest robes. 
  Thankfully, he didn’t trip this time — that was always hard to explain away. 
  The air felt a little strange, as Tsuna knelt and completed the fake exorcism. And his stick — currently serving as a scam prop with paper ropes tied onto it, but in actuality a collapsible nightstick he had been given as self-defense weapon — was almost uncomfortably hot in his hand. It made him hesitate and get up only slowly. 
  Before he could lift his head, the nearby peanut gallery gasped collectively. When Tsuna looked at them, they were all staring at something on the high wall of the lobby, behind the reception desk. 
  Tsuna turned. 
  “Hiiiiieeee—!” 
  There was dark red, blood-like substance flowing down the smooth surface of the wall. There was no indication where the hopefully-not-blood came from, as it seemingly appeared out of nowhere several dozen feet up. It didn’t flow straight down like a proper rust stain either. The red smears thickened and thinned, and curved — into what looked entirely too much like writing. 
  PAY 
  PAY 
  PAY
  —It said. 
  “M-Mr. Sawada!” the building owner whimpered. “Wh-what…” 
  Tsuna also did not know what. With trembling hands, he fumbled through his robes and pulled out his cellphone, hitting the speed-dial for the office. 
  The call did not go through. What came from the speaker was instead an almost cliche horror movie mix of sounds — a screech, static, and a long moan-like clicking. The screen flickered and showed Tsuna’s wallpaper, only to glitch and twist until there was something like the shadow of a screaming face among the pixels. 
  Tsuna wanted to pass out. He really, really wanted to pass out. 
  His terrified shrieking — as well as that of the gathered businessmen — was drowned out by the clatter of the storm shutters descending across all the lobby windows. The suited clients, er, concerned citizens scattered, running in several directions in a futile bid to find some way out of the lobby that was suddenly in lockdown. Tsuna’s legs trembled too much to follow them. 
  It was suddenly the real deal?! Unfair! Illegal!! 
  …Hauntings were, in fact, illegal. They had rules about them. Tsuna couldn’t remember them now, but they were definitely in the rulebook. (He had thought it was kind of funny at the time, but he definitely couldn’t laugh about it anymore.) 
  “Mr. Sawada! Mr. Sawada, do something!” one of the suits wailed, suddenly grabbing onto him. 
  Do something? Like what?! 
  The lights flickered disconcertingly, taking on a red glow. There was the sound of static and an air raid siren echoing across the lobby, almost loud enough to drown out the sobbing and the screaming. 
  Between the half-light, darkness, and eerie red backlight, a figure appeared near the blocked off doors. Shapeless under a swathing cloak, it turned slowly toward those that had been pawing hopelessly at the shutters, prompting a new round of screaming. 
  Now, there was even a… ghost? Grim reaper? 
  Tsuna was so terrified that he mostly just felt numb. 
  Some of the other businessmen had been frantically pounding the elevator button up, and their prayers were unexpectedly answered. With a quiet ding that was almost drowned out by the chaos — why were there sounds of thunder?! — the thick doors slid open, and blessed, pale light flooded out of the elevator cabin. 
  Everyone who hadn’t been standing by the elevator rushed toward it. Those that had been already there tumbled inside like knocked over bowling pins. The suit who had been clinging to Tsuna followed suit, dropping him like last season’s designer boots and sprinting toward the salvation elevator with a speed that belied his impressive salaryman drinking belly. 
  Naturally, Tsuna very much wanted to follow. But when he tried to do so, still staring fixedly at the cloaked apparition slowly approaching, the hem of Haru’s carefully sewn robes tangled his legs. 
  With a yelp, he splattered across the polished floor. His attempts to either scramble to his feet or just scramble away on all fours were impeded by those same robes, leaving Tsuna faceplanting a few more times. The cloaked figure approached slowly but unrelentingly. 
  “Hiiiieee—! S-s-stay away!” Tsuna squealed. 
  In pure, mind-numbing panic, he threw his baton at it. 
  What happened next could only be considered an act of providence, proof of the divine — or that the universe had a terrible sense of humor. Tsuna’s aim was and had always been atrocious. He really couldn’t even hit the broad side of a gym. 
  And yet, with a dull thud, the nightstick planted solidly into the center of the ominous figure’s hooded… head? It bounced off and clattered away somewhere in the shadows, but Tsuna had no mind to care about that. 
  Along with the ability to aim, he also lacked any sort of arm strength, so logically, getting hit by something he threw should have not been worth noting. But the cloaked figure swayed and, unbelievably, toppled over into a heap of fabric and… limbs? 
  Legs in jeans and sneakers, completely normal-looking arms… With the cloak bunched up carelessly, the true nature of the ‘menacing figure’ was revealed. 
  The lights were still flickering, there was still a horror movie soundtrack of noises echoing through the lobby, and the exits were still all blocked. But Tsuna didn’t have the mood to ‘appreciate’ that any longer. Slowly and carefully crawling over, he used two fingers to pull back the hood of the cloak. Beneath was… the face of a completely ordinary young man, maybe a couple years older than Tsuna. 
  “Oh, Madam President, isn’t that your youngest?” the suit, who had clung to Tsuna and then heartlessly abandoned him, had come back and peered over his shoulder with interest. 
  Tsuna had a truly annoying premonition. 
  In a while, they would indeed confirm that this young man was the building owner’s youngest son, skilled with computers and going through a rebellious phase. Since this building was quite modern, everything was controlled through electronic systems. Painting something invisible on the wall to leave an outline for the rust-colored liquid to fill was also simple, if you were creative. He had apparently planned to lock all the executives, their assistants and Tsuna in the elevators for a while to give them a good scare, then let them out without too much harm. 
  So basically, a horror-themed family dispute, the kind of thing no one even wanted the cops to be involved in, much less some dubious government committee. 
  …There were actual hauntings, zombie outbreaks, and monster attacks out there. Tsuna had been assured of this point. 
  However, this was not one of them. 
  ~.~.~
  It was late night, and the Committee office had been slowly emptying. Even Kyoko was already packing up. Before heading out, she stopped by Tsuna’s desk, where he was mournfully pecking away at a report regarding the latest joke of an incident. 
  He was mourning his overworked brain, his lost youth and innocent dreams, and also his sore eyes from staring at the computer screen for so long. At least this incident had been minor enough that only Deputy Chief Kusakabe would be checking his report, not the actual Chief. Reports to the Chief had to be written with a brush. 
  “Don’t stay too late, Tsuna-kun,” Kyoko said, patting his shoulder kindly. “You can finish in the morning.” 
  “Deputy Chief said it has to be in his inbox first thing tomorrow,” Tsuna said gloomily. 
  Kyoko’s lips pursed disapprovingly. “For such a minor incident? He’s just giving you a hard time because you’re new,” she said, huffing. “We should make a complaint!” 
  “It’s okay, it’s okay,” Tsuna assured her quickly. “It’s just so that I learn the ropes!” He appreciated Kyoko’s willingness to stand up for him — truly worthy of his first crush — but this level of… what couldn’t even be called hazing wasn’t even worth mentioning, for someone who had been thoroughly bullied all through his school years. This was just actually doing his work, not having his shoes hidden or his books torn up or anything like that. 
  “…Well, okay,” Kyoko conceded after a moment. “But tell me if it gets too much, okay? I’ll see you tomorrow.” 
  “See you tomorrow!” 
  Once she had stepped into the elevator, drops sliding shut behind her, Tsuna let his waving hand drop and slumped in his not very comfortable office chair with a groan. 
  He had always received abysmal scores in composition, but this was far from Tsuna’s first time writing a mission report, so it wasn’t like he didn’t know what to do. Even if there remained a 50-50 chance that Deputy Chief Kusakabe would send it back to him for corrections, that was still an improvement over his previous 4 out of 5 returned as unacceptable. 
  Tsuna was really just dragging his feet and procrastinating too much, partly out of embarrassment. He had actually gotten caught up in that prank and believed it. None of the others would have fallen for it, he bet. But mostly, it was taking so long out of boredom. Writing reports… was really boring. 
  Sighing, he sat up and went back to typing. 
  Half of the lights in the office had automatically turned off once the motion sensors no longer picked up anyone around. With almost all staff done for the day, the only sounds were the clicking of keys from Tsuna’s desk — and muffled cursing from Gokudera’s, where he was supposed to be working on his own report, along with a formal apology to the owner of the construction site he’d blow up instead of ‘exorcising’. 
  Tsuna had already been almost done anyway, and once the main recounting of events was done, the more formulaic closing sections came to him with the ease of practice. 
  His head snapped up in surprise at the sound of an office chair skittering back. Not his chair — Gokudera’s. 
  His coworker stalked around the row of desks with a scowl and a slouch that any delinquent would have been proud of. With the Chief absent, Gokudera had even dared to wear his regulation black suit unbuttoned, with his tie pulled loose. Frankly speaking, he terrified Tsuna only slightly less than Chief Hibari and Chrome in one of her kufufu moods, so Tsuna made every effort to remain very still, in hopes of being overlooked. 
  No such luck. It was precisely his desk that Gokudera shambled his way over to, and when Tsuna failed to look at him in a timely manner, he kicked snappishly at the legs of his chair. 
  “Hey, new kid!” Gokudera barked. 
  “Y-yes!” Tsuna spun around, spine ramrod straight and his gaze somewhere to the left of Gokudera’s head. 
  Unexpectedly, a phone was thrust at him, making Tsuna fumble as he tried to take it, missed, and finally clutched it in his sweaty paws. “This is… my phone?” he realized. How did Gokudera manage to get it? Tsuna thought he might have left it on his desk, or maybe in his bag, or… Well, he wasn’t sure where he’d left it, but he hadn’t handed it over. 
  “Getting hacked by some amateur, that’s just embarrassing,” Gokudera grumbled. Sticking out his lower lip in a way that was probably meant to be intimidating but would be more sullen to anyone except Tsuna, he looked off somewhere to the side and rubbed the back of his neck. “I put in some actual security for yah. And a couple sensors for fluctuations in od, in case you finally manage to run into some actual deviations in ambient true energy.” 
  “Like a ghost sensor?” Tsuna guessed, mostly because he wasn’t sure what else Gokudera could be talking about. 
  “Don’t call it something so unscientific!” 
  “Hiieee! Yes! Yes!” Tsuna squeaked, ducking his head and trying to hide behind his newly modified phone as Gokudera snapped at him. 
  Clicking his tongue irritably, Gokudera turned and shambled away, perhaps back to his own report and apology letter that were still waiting for him. He was exceptionally brilliant, Tsuna was aware, so a few updates to a phone wouldn’t take him long, but the fact that he had taken the time to do it… 
  Tsuna smiled down into his lap, fiddling with the device. 
  “Th… thank you, Gokudera-kun,” he mumbled. 
  His didn’t have the guts to raise his voice, but in the quiet, empty office, there was no doubt Gokudera heard him. 
  ~.~.~
  Sasagawa Ryohei and Yamamoto Takeshi returned the next day, making the office much livelier. Ryohei had been on helping look into recurring disappearances of hikers on the ominously named Death Mountain, while Yamamoto had been sent to the beach regarding a supposed sea monster attack. 
  Both of those definitely sounded like better assignments, so it was no wonder the more senior agents snatched them up. …That being said, Tsuna was aware that his pathetic stamina and physical capabilities wouldn’t have been up to running around in the mountains, or even out in full sun on the beach. Ryohei and Yamamoto, being sports club types, were far more suited to those kinds of missions. 
  “So was it a real one this time?” Kyoko asked when she stopped by her brother’s desk that morning. Since it wasn’t a private sort of conversation, naturally everyone listened in. 
  “Nah,” Ryohei waved one hand wrapped up in bandages like always. “They all just kept getting lost to the extreme. Only thing out there was piles of beer bottles. I made a few groups help cleanup, and since they all made it back, everyone calmed down about the place.” 
  Kyoko laughed, bright and cheerful. Tsuna, two desks away, sighed. Typical for their office, really. 
  Pushing off from his desk, Yamamoto rolled over in his chair. He spun around to face them smoothly and said with a grin, “Mine was real.” 
  “Oh!” Kyoko gasped excitedly, and even Gokudera, who detested Yamamoto fiercely, leaned closer to listen in. 
  Yamamoto’s smile widened as he began to narrate. “There really was a sea monster, tentacles and everything. It was a kind of mutant octonus thing, but also with lobster pincers. It swallowed a bunch of people and a few boats, and when it spit them out, they were covered with goo… very gross.” 
  “Mutation? From pollution? Radiation?” Gokudera muttered to himself. 
  “It’s good that it spit them out,” Kyoko said. “Were they okay?” 
  “Oh yeah, they were fine,” Yamamoto said. “I mean, grossed out, but fine. It turns out… somebody dropped an ice cream cone into the water, and it really liked the taste, so it was looking for more. Once it figured out where to look, it mostly just kept eating ice cream trucks…” 
  Kyoko laughed again, but Tsuna could only groan internally and palm his face. 
  Really? A real life monster, and it just… wanted ice cream? Why was his job like this? Why was the world like this? Ice cream?! What about the hunger for human flesh! What about revenge against mankind! What about invasion of the sea dwellers! Manga had lied to him!!
  Even when the monsters were real, the cases were still ridiculous. 
  …Well, at least he was getting paid. The benefits were also good. 
  Their gossip time came to an abrupt end as Yamamoto spotted something behind them and quickly sat up straight, his expression serious and professional. A quick glance confirmed — it was Deputy Chief Kusakabe, coming over from Chrome’s… office, or maybe cell, Tsuna wasn’t clear. In the presence of an authority figure, everyone quickly turned to their desks and computers, trying to project an image of productivity and focus. 
  Their attempts weren’t very good, but Kusakabe didn’t seem to notice. He wasn’t like the Chief anyway. Although he was certainly stern, he had always been patient with Tsuna’s many, many, many screw ups. 
  Trailing behind him was Chrome. Tsuna blinked in surprise — it was rare for her to leave her area. 
  “Sasagawa,” the Deputy Chief called out. “Your status?” 
  “Yes! I’m extremely good!” Ryohei sounded off without hesitation. “Ready to go any time!” 
  Kusakabe nodded. “Good, then come along,” he said. “The rest of you, don’t take any cases today. Stay at the office and hold down the fort. I will contact you if the situation changes.” 
  He didn’t explain what that meant, walking off quickly with Chrome and Ryohei in tow. When the Deputy Chief’s figure vanished into the elevator, Tsuna glanced at the others. “W… what situation?” he wondered. “What was that all about?” 
  “Are you dumb? There must be something big going down, if the Deputy’s taking Dokuro out,” Gokudera said snappishly. 
  “Sounds like it,” Yamamoto agreed, somewhat pensively. Agreeing with Gokudera earned him a sharp glare. “And we’re on standby, so I guess we should be ready to help, if it comes to that.” 
  The earlier cheerful gossip mood had all but dissipated, and everyone began to turn back to their tasks with a lingering sense of tension, even as Kyoko quietly wondered whether to let Lambo know. Tsuna cursed internally. With the current state of things, Deputy Chief Kusakabe had almost certainly had no time to read his report. If he’d know it would be like this, he wouldn’t have bothered staying late yesterday to finish it! 
  ~.~.~ 
  The weather recently had been sunny and very suitable for summer, but by afternoon, thick gray clouds had overtaken the sky and wind battered in strong gusts against the windows. Although it was still early, typhoon season had begun. 
  After lunch, Kyoko read out the weather forecast. “Meteorologists were taken off guard by the sudden appearance of the storm front rolling onto the Kanto coast…” she said distractedly, her eyes skimming the text on her screen. “Expected to make landfall around sunset… Category is not yet determined… I’d say we should head home a little early to make sure we’re not caught out in the storm, but with the way things are… what should we do?” 
  The Special Investigation, Containment, and Discipline Committee, Namimori branch, wasn’t a large group to begin with. With the Chief, the Deputy Chief and even Ryohei out, everyone left was about the same age and with little difference in seniority. When it came to making a decision, they could only exchange uncertain looks, no one willing to take on the responsibility. 
  After about a minute of silence, Kyoko accepted that there would be no answer. “Okay,” she said. “Deputy Chief didn’t say we needed to stay late, and we don’t have a night shift to begin with, so let’s have one person stay until closing, and everyone else can head home early. Who lives closest?” 
  Ah, Kyoko-chan really was amazing, Tsuna thought. 
  “Probably me,” he volunteered. “I can stay.” 
  It was summer, so it wasn’t like sunset was at all close to the normal end of business. It would be windy, but he’d make it home fine. 
  …Or so Tsuna told himself while foolishly smiling at Kyoko. Things like logic and actual thinking were not involved. 
  Since meteorologists had completely failed to predict this storm coming in at all, why did he think they’d be able to predict when it would arrive? By five PM, it was so dark out that the few passing cars needed headlights, even hours away from sunset. The sky was a roiling gunmetal gray. When Tsuna stepped outside, he was nearly blown off his feet by a gust of wind, and his backpack was shoved up so hard that it hit the back of his head. 
  Stumbling along with a series of yelps lost on the wind, he managed to grab hold of a lamp post and clung for dear life. 
  There was no one else out on the streets, because every other person in Namimori had more sense than Tsuna. Aaah, why did Kyoko-chan’s smile have to be so cute and wonderful? Why did he have to go and try to act all reliable? Bemoaning his own foolishness, Tsuna squinted against the wind and tried to get his bearings. There was nothing to do but hug the buildings and stagger off in the direction of the train station. 
  However, Tsuna only made it a block over before a hand clamped onto his shoulder and he was suddenly dragged into a narrow alley between buildings. 
  “Hiiiiee! Take my wallet! Take my bag! Take anything, just don’t kill me!” he started begging immediately, throwing his arms over his head and cringing away. 
  But the presumed mugger, or maybe human trafficker, or maybe serial killer made no demands and didn’t hit him. After several long moments of silence, Tsuna dared to peek out, trembling. 
  What greeted him was infinitely more terrifying than a petty crook. Or a human trafficker. Or a serial killer. 
  It was his boss. 
  “Ch-Ch-Chief!” Tsuna stuttered helplessly. 
  Hibari Kyoya stared at him with the same blank coffin face as always, somehow still faintly exuding an aura of violence and murder. Unlike usual, his suit jacket was missing, and his tie was askew. He was also soaked, even though it hadn’t started raining yet. 
  “Phone,” Hibari ordered sharply. As Tsuna scrambled to obey, he added, “Call Kusakabe.” 
  “Y-yes! Right away, sir!” Tsuna blurted out, fumbling as he went through his pockets. Where had he put it? Oh, he better not have lost it. He’d be losing his life next… 
  Fortunately, his work phone turned up before Chief Hibari could lose his temper and give him another beating that was precisely short of putting him in the hospital. This was, Tsuna felt distantly aware, completely illegal and abuse of an innocent subordinate. But even Deputy Chief Kusakabe had just said it was “training,” and since Tsuna only saw the Chief once a month at most, it was still preferable to… shudder, returning to the job market. 
  It was only with his phone in hand that Tsuna realized it was continually beeping and vibrating as some kind of alarm went off. Given the juvenile punk font of the notification on his screen, Tsuna could guess this was Gokudera’s ghost sensing app. 
  He couldn’t tell how its metrics are supposed to work, but the weird typeset certainly looked threatening. It was also annoyingly hard to dismiss. 
  “J-just a moment, sir!” Tsuna squeaked, darting a nervous glance at Hibari. 
  The Chief was no longer paying him any mind. Hibari’s attention was on the main street outside their little back alley, and his expression was subtly furrowed. “Hurry up,” he ordered shortly, lifting up one of his tonfas. The other was notably absent, along with his belt and one of his cufflinks. “It’s here.” 
  …What was? 
  Down the street, a manhole cover was suddenly thrown into the air as a geyser of water burst up from underground. Then another, and another, and another, geysers burst up one after another, moving down the street — toward them. 
  “W-what the…” Tsuna muttered, staring in shock. The phone in his hand blared an alarm, louder and louder. 
  Water was flooding down the street, crashing against the buildings and sweeping away anything that had been left outside. But as the wave rushed past their alley, Chief Hibari inexplicably… lifted his tonfa and struck out at it. 
  The force of his blow parted the water halfway across the street, revealing the asphalt and the painted lanes — and making Tsuna’s eyebrows climb in shock and some horror. He’d known their Chief was strong, but this was just shounen anime levels of ridiculous. Thank goodness he’d apparently held back when beating up Tsuna. Thank you, Chief, you’re so merciful! 
  Something moaned unhappily, and waves twisted around to bear down on Hibari. 
  Great. So it was a water monster. 
  Hahaha… ha…
  Frantically, Tsuna pounded on his phone screen. He could barely tear his eyes away from the spectacle of his boss fighting a wall of water that continually reformed under his devastating attacks, but somehow he finally managed to hit the contacts and the Deputy Chief’s entry. 
  “This is Kusa—”
  “Sir! Sir! Sir! Chief is here! And fighting! And water!” Tsuna wailed without waiting for Kusakabe to greet him. 
  “We’ll be right there,” Kusakabe said with an unnatural degree of calm. Presumably, they could track his phone’s GPS to fight out where ‘here’ was. 
  Tsuna did not pay this or the end of the call any mind. Screeching, he threw himself aside just in time to avoid a lashing water tentacle that struck down the alley. The heavy industrial dumpster which took the hit in his stead was dented into a rough V and was thrown free of where it had been chained down. 
  This was it, the real deal. A real monster or supernatural phenomenon or ghost or whatever. Tsuna’s internal whining about his boring con artist job had finally been answered. 
  And now he was going to die for it. 
  But before the next water whip could turn Tsuna into another rough V shape, Hibari forcefully punted him aside. …Well, no. Despite the pain, all his organs were still intact, so it wasn’t that forceful, really. Ah, Chief, so merciful…
  “Useless!” Hibari barked, but he didn’t have the attention to spare for the glaring that usually accompanied such a pronouncement. Although he was still fighting with relentless intensity, even a useless wimp like Tsuna could see that he was being forced back step by step. 
  Distantly, he considered drawing his own weapon, but really, what good would it do? 
  And in the middle of the chaos, it began to rain. 
  It came down suddenly and heavily, almost blinding Tsuna. And even though the volume of water added shouldn’t have made any difference yet, the wave blocking the alleyway and advancing on Hibari swelled and reared up. 
  ‘Oh no,’ Tsuna thought, just before it crashed down over both of them, completely disregarding Hibari’s last attack. 
  Blub, blub, blub — a few bubbles sprang free before Tsuna managed to clamp his mouth shut. The underwater currents sent him spinning head over heels, and he was vaguely surprised that he hadn’t been thrown into any of the buildings. The alley had been narrow, after all, and despite having lost his bearings, he thought that he had already floated quite a ways. When he tried to pry his eyes open, he couldn’t see anything at all. 
  A pale hand shot out of the dark water and grabbed hold of his jacket collar. 
  It was Hibari. He glared at Tsuna, then twisted — and somehow, in defiance of all laws of physics, hurled him away. Before Tsuna knew what was happening, he shot out from beneath the surface and crashed onto a ledge a couple stories up. Rain was pelting down in full now, driven by gusting winds. Rolling onto his hands and knees, Tsuna scrambled up to the edge and looked down at the flood water that ran along the streets. 
  “Ch… Chief!” he called out. “Chief!!” 
  He needed to do something! But he couldn’t do anything! Tsuna wailed helplessly. 
  With an ear-splitting screech, a car skidded around the corner down the street. It sent sheets of water flying, making Tsuna realize with some surprise that the flooding was not nearly as high as he had expected. It was only just above a person’s knees. Even accounting for a strong current, how in the world could Hibari have been swept away…? 
  Right. Supernatural monster thing. 
  Even before the large black car had jerked to a stop, the rear door was flung open and Chrome, looking tiny and delicate as always, jumped out onto the rainy street. A long trident appeared in her hand — Tsuna felt sure she hadn’t been carrying it inside the car, since how could she have moved so smoothly with it? And then, just as she landed on the wet asphalt, Chrome… turned into a man. 
  Okay. 
  Twirling the trident over his head, guy-Chrome (??) slammed its tail into the pavement, and a shockwave rippled out all the way down the street. 
  The rain was sent flying. The water was sent flying. Tsuna was sent flying, barely managing to stay on his ledge — the fall was the kind that killed normal people. 
  There was a long silence as even the storm was momentarily halted. 
  Then, something landed on top of Tsuna’s head with a wet plunk and bounced off. It wasn’t rain. Left wiggling helplessly on the ledge was a single ordinary goldfish. 
  It wasn’t single for long. A veritable torrent of goldfish soon followed it down, covering the entire street in piles of flopping little bodies. The largest pile stirred, and Hibari rose up out of it, looking particularly murderous and also entirely too threatening for someone with fish in his hair. 
  “Kufufufu,” guy-Chrome laughed mockingly. “No need to thank me, ‘Chief’. How could I possibly leave you to struggle on your own with just your meager power? Kufufu…” 
  Tsuna’s first thought that guy-Chrome clearly wanted to die very much, but that didn’t seem to be the case. Without giving Hibari a chance to brutally murder him, guy-Chrome swiftly turned back into normal Chrome, his creepy laughter still echoing in the air. Chrome looked at the Chief wide-eyed, clutching the trident’s shaft to her chest. 
  Hibari, waist-deep in goldfish and under the pleading stare of a cute girl, gritted his teeth and, kicking his way free, stalked toward Kusakabe, who had emerged from the large black car’s driver’s seat. 
  “Deal with this,” he ordered Kusakabe, passing by Chrome without a look at her and stepping into the still open rear door of the car. The car door slammed shut behind him. 
  Then, it opened again, and Ryohei was unceremoniously flug out, followed by another slam. 
  Wordlessly, Kusakabe pulled out his cellphone and began to make arrangements. 
  Clearing his throat, Tsuna called out, “Um… Excuse me? Could someone… help me get down?” 
  ~.~.~ 
  The next day, the Chief did not come in and the Deputy Chief was away as well, probably handling some kind of cleanup and explanations to their superiors. Regardless, the office gossip circle reconvened with impunity. 
  “It’s so sad,” Kyoko sighed. “Those poor fish… I don’t think I’m ever going to be able to look at those festival stalls the same way again.” 
  It turned out that the water monster, which drew in a storm and flooded several locations across Namimori, had been created out of the accumulated resentment of all the goldfish that had been flushed down toilets over the years. Many of them had come from the summer festivals and the traditional dish scooping booths. Kids and couples and who knows who else would win themselves a goldfish in a bag, only to realize they didn’t actually want one after they got home. 
  So down the toilet the fish would go, and its little resentful goldfish spirit would haunt the sewers, schooling together with its countless wronged brethren. Until they had enough to make an entire monster. 
  Tsuna didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. 
  “Hahaha… yeah, same,” Yamamoto agreed. “I’m just sad I missed it. But hey, good on Sawada for having his first real encounter, huh? So how was it? Exciting?” 
  “Uh… I wouldn’t really call it that,” Tsuna said. “Did you think it was exciting, when you had your first, uh, encounter?” 
  “Yeah! It was great!” Yamamoto said, laughing. 
  Uncharitably, Tsuna enforced the ‘crazy adrenaline junky’ label in his mind. He’d suspected as much. After all, Yamamoto was good looking, popular, and talented. Why else would he stay at this kind of job? 
  “Did you even do anything?” Gokudera asked dubiously. 
  “I… called Deputy Chief Kusakabe?” Tsuna said, thinking for a moment. “I think Chief lost his own phone, so we had to use mine.” 
  “That’s good!” Kyoko encouraged. “The first I went out on a case I just got kidnapped…” She laughed self-deprecatingly. 
  Feeling daring after facing death by monster the day before, Tsuna patted her on the shoulder and offered her a smile in return. “Let’s work hard,” he suggested. 
  “Yeah!” Kyoko agreed brightly. 
  The warm glowey feeling of camaraderie sustained Tsuna through the day and writing this time’s incident report, which was more nerve-wracking than usual, given the need to avoid putting anything that might make the Chief look not absolutely terrifying and invincible. Tsuna felt he did pretty good at that, so it was utterly unfair that the Chief appeared anyway, as if summoned by the mere thought of him. 
  Instead of striding straight from the elevator to his office like usual, looking neither left nor right as if his minions, er, employees didn’t even exist — which was how both sides preferred it — Hibari paused mid-step and took a sharp turn, heading for Tsuna’s desk. 
  Tsuna watched him approach in mute shock. So did everyone else. It was only when Hibari came to a stop slightly further than necessary from him that Kyoko, Yamamoto, Gokudera and Ryohei remembered to snap their heads away and furiously pretend to be busy and not eavesdropping with their ears pricked. 
  Naturally, Tsuna wanted to turn away too, but he didn’t dare. Jumping to his feet, back ramrod straight, he saluted instead. “Ch-Chief!" 
  He also didn’t dare to ask what Hibari wanted. 
  The silence stretched on. 
  ”…You,“ Hibari said finally. 
  "Yes!” Tsuna sweated intensely. 
  “Are you quitting?" 
  The question was blunt and simple, but also so unexpected that Tsuna only stared at his boss in confusing. "Am I being fired…?” he wondered. 
  “No,” Hibari said. 
  “Um,” Tsuna said. “Then… also no…?” 
  The Chief pinned him with an unreadable (terrifying) look for far too long, before finally nodding sharply. “Good,” he allowed. It was glowing praise for Hibari, and Tsuna had no idea what to do with it. Turning on his heel, his boss strode away just as abruptly as he had come, leaving Tsuna feeling like he’d managed to escape death — as usual. 
  “Great job, Tsuna-kun!” Kyoko said, giving him a thumbs up. He returned it numbly. 
  “Yeah, great job! You didn’t ditch like the last three new guys!” Yamamoto said. Rolling over, he threw an arm over Tsuna’s shoulders. “Now you’re one of us for real!” 
  …Oh! Was that what it had been about? 
  Well, it was true that a normal person would have probably run away screaming after their first encounter with a real supernatural being. Probably, the Committee had lost many recruits that way. Tsuna also… somewhat wanted to run away. 
  But the hazard pay was very high. 
  And, frankly, the monster was still better than a job interview. At least it didn’t stare into his soul and demand, in various ways without pause, that he justify his place in society and his right to exist. 
  Even though it was equal parts ridiculous and terrifying… he thought he just might like this job. 
  ~.~.~
22 notes · View notes
placesyoucallhome · 3 years
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the good: thunderstorm this morning, yay!
the bad: random alarms and sirens keep going off and that is distressing!
5 notes · View notes
imsofuckintiredbruh · 5 years
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Scary True Stories
Dog-Sitting 1
When the oldest of our friend group got her first car, she drove us around and we spent a lot of time hanging out at places other than each of our houses. One time she was house/dog sitting for a couple who were on vacation. She had a good reputation as a responsible sitter so she was given permission by the owners to invite friends to spend the night. We all were very excited. She had an afternoon shift at Taco Time that day, so we would just chill out at the house until she got back and then we would have a fun girls’ night.
The two dogs were kept in the garage and were not allowed in the house since they weren’t house trained yet. My friend told us to just let her feed them when she got back, so we left them alone. We spent a lot of time just lazing around, eating snacks, and watching TV. Things we never got to do at home.
It was around 4:00 when there was a knock on the door. One of us got up to see who it was. It was a woman who told us that she lived nearby and had found one of the dogs on her property. She pointed to her truck and we saw the dog in the back. We all hurried to the garage to see if the other puppy was there but to our horror, the garage door was wide open and the second dog was missing.
The neighbor woman scolded us for being irresponsible and insisted that she would take the puppy she found to her house and that we go out to search the property for the lost dog. We told her that we would look and she left us to our work.
None of us had any phones so we used the house phone to call our friend at her work. No answer. We tried calling our parents to help us. Only my mom answered but it was no use. She asked for the house address, but I wasn’t familiar with the area and really had no idea where we were.
All of us went looking around the property to try and find the missing dog but the area was on a steep hill and there wasn’t very good visibility. The dog could be anywhere at this point.
We met together in the house to think of some sort of solution to our mess. After making two more desperate calls to our friend again, the owners called. My friend answered the phone and I didn’t hear what the woman was saying but I could tell just by her face that the owner was chewing her out. I didn’t blame her, but we were at a loss of what to do.
The neighbor woman was at the door again, knocking angrily. When we opened the door, she yelled at us demanding to know where the other dog was and to keep looking for it. Two of my friends were panicking and began crying when she left, so they stayed in the house while the rest of us just wandered around the woodsy area without direction. I felt so helpless.
We walked in separate directions and went as deep into the surrounding forest as we dared until it was too dark and we did not feel safe alone.
Together at the house again, we had mostly calmed down and with our heads clearer, we voted to stay put and rest until our older friend came home. She would know what to do. Hours went by and other than a phone call and some sharp words from the owner again, it was quiet.
We were beginning to worry about our older friend, since she was due back by now. We heard voices outside. A man and woman were arguing. We cautiously peeked out the front curtains to see the same neighbor lady and a man. I recognized the man from church. It was Carl. When the woman backed away from him and he approached the door, we opened it and asked him for help. He told us that the woman had found both dogs and he had ordered her to return them to us.
While she brought the dogs back, he called the owners on the house phone. He comforted them and said that the dogs were in very good hands and that we were a good bunch of kids. He hung up and made sure we were all okay. Our friend came back just then and so did the neighbor. Carl put the dogs in the garage with food and water and shut the big door. Our friend insisted that she had locked it before she left and we never figured out what exactly happened.
The adults left and we ate dinner and watched a movie and went to bed.
Cat-Sitting Part 1
A family friend owned a mother cat with four young kittens. When she asked me to stay at her house to watch them for a month, I readily agreed to it. I was also working at a new job, so it was a great opportunity to handle lots of responsibility at a time.
It was winter and they lived in a really rough part of town. But, my parents didn’t live too far away, so I was comfortable sleeping there. The first few days were pretty uneventful. I mostly hung out with the mother cat. I’m not a big cat person, but we got along pretty well.
One night, I was eating dinner and watching a movie. I heard a police car drive by with the sirens on. This was a pretty usual occurrence around there, so I thought nothing of it. Maybe five minutes later, another one raced by.  Then I saw three different police cruisers driving past in the same direction as the others. This usually means that a drug house got busted. Nothing I hadn’t heard before, but the sound was a little annoying so I turned the TV off and listened to music with earbuds, instead.
I was getting pretty sleepy a few songs in, when the cat sprang out of my lap. Someone was knocking at the door. The owner of the house never told me she was expecting any visitors, but regardless, I had no intention of responding and I sat very still, waiting for my heart to slow down. Whoever it was knocked again. This one was more aggressive but I was insistent on ignoring them.
They eventually gave up and left. I didn’t think I was really fooling anyone, since my car was out front and a lamp in the living room was on, but I was glad they got the message.
When I was sure they were gone, I got into bed for the night. I slept in the Master bedroom which was at the corner of the house and had two windows. I made sure the curtains were shut and I spent a few hours messing around on my phone.
It was about 11 at night and I was so sleepy I nearly missed what sounded like someone fiddling with the chain-link fence gate. I’m a very paranoid person, but I tried to keep calm and listen carefully.
It scared the shit out of me when the aggressive knocking at the door happened again. I heard the cat jump in surprise and she must’ve bumped into something because I heard an object falling. Part of me assumed it was the same person as before. I heard nothing else for a few minutes. Lying there in bed I remember silently pleading that they would just leave me alone.
I’m very easily frightened, so when I heard shuffling in the grass outside my window, I was paralyzed. Someone tapped on the window right above my head and I felt my soul leave my body. I knew that I could call my mother or the police or someone to help, but I was completely frozen.
I couldn’t see the person, but I heard a man’s voice. He was very obviously off his rocker and addresses me by the name of the owner of the house. I then remembered that the owner had an ex husband who was a severe drug addict. They had a rocky on and off relationship. I suspected he was too high right then to function.
He kept tapping and saying her name. I cleared my throat and tried to be as firm as I could to tell him to fuck off. He pleaded once more and I said I would call the police if he didn’t get off the property.
I didn’t hear him again but I couldn’t sleep the rest of the night.
Dog-Sitting 2
My boss at my new job asked me out of the blue if I liked dogs. She and her husband loved to travel and were getting a puppy and needed a good dog sitter to hire whenever they would be gone. I loved dogs and after a few visits to their house, where I got a tour of the house and a tutorial on puppy and garden care, I was left to watch a sweet little retriever and water their garden for a few weeks.
It was odd from the beginning. The room I was to stay in had a church pew in it which had a collection of very old and very creepy dolls standing on it. That’s pretty common in an older folks house, but I knew I wasn’t going to get any sleep with those faces staring at me, so I very gently placed them all in the closet and set my clothes on the pew so I wouldn’t have to even think about the dolls while I was there.
The garden was impressive and I would’ve enjoyed watering the plants more but there always seemed to be people walking past while I did the chore. There were walls surrounding the garden, but they weren’t very high up and I’m rather tall, so if one of their neighbors were outside at the time, I would see them. This wouldn’t be a problem if they didn’t stare. They would just look at me for an uncomfortable amount of time. I even started to wonder if I was watering the plants the wrong way or something.
I’ve had my fair share of creaky floors, but this house was so much worse. I would just sit in the living room playing with the puppy and hear a long, moaning creak. It was just the house being a typical old house but the intensity was unnerving. Every step I took was broadcasted and I felt exposed in a weird way.
There was a night where I heard a group of people get into a fight in the alleyway below my second story window. From what I could hear, it was a drug-related argument and they were pretty young, maybe high schoolers. It got a little physical and after they left the area, a police car drove by.
This was all just weird but the last few days were absolutely horrible to get through. One evening I was eating a bowl of ice cream and watching TV when a person walked past the sliding glass door to my right. It was a woman in a dress and she looked right at me and smiled. She was inside the garden but the gates were both locked. No one told me to expect any other people and I don’t know how she got there. She walked past once and then she was gone, I never saw her again. I’ll be honest, I was a little drunk so I could have just been seeing things at that point. It messed me up though.
The number one worst thing that scared me shitless was Alexa. I had never been around an Amazon Echo before. Hell, I didn’t know that the owners had one, but I sure found out.
I was eating dinner and messing around on my phone (which is always on silent). I’m a very non-vocal person, in fact I don’t think I spoke aloud at all my entire time in that house. Suddenly the device laughed and my spoon flung out of my hand and landed with another loud sound that startled me a second time. I thought someone was in the house and I swear I almost cried tears I was so sick to my stomach with panic. I listened for the sound of feet or some sign that someone was there and Alexa said “Are you okay?” I’m an idiot and don’t realize that it’s her. I can’t even speak now I’m so shaken. I’m still waiting for someone to come into the kitchen and stab me or something. I nearly called the cops because of a dumb Amazon Alexa.
When the couple came back I was very glad to leave. They paid me well enough but I told them that I was not interested in house-sitting a second time.
Cat-Sitting Part 2
The family friend, whose cat I watched before? She moved into a new house and now she takes care of one of the last kittens (now an adult cat) and she offered to hire me to take care of him for a month. I needed a nice quiet place to rest after the shitty holiday I just had. They lived out in the boonies where I wouldn’t have to deal with people. It was perfect.
I say out in the boonies and I mean it. That house sat on the outskirts of a forest and since it was winter, the fog was so thick and white in the mornings that you could not see the grass outside the window. And it was quiet. Painfully quiet. I kept the heater going almost all day for some white noise because I could hear my own heartbeat otherwise.
The cat was a sweetie and warmed up to me in no time. I like to think he remembered me from when I cared for him in his kitten years. I spent most of the day reading and cuddling on the couch with him.
I tried to make as few trips into town as possible during my stay. One reason was gas money; and because the road up to the house was very rocky and the pile of junk that I use as a car doesn’t do very well on the steep, unpaved hill.
On a Friday, I had just gotten more food and clay masks for some ‘me time’. I also rented a few scary movies and was planning on vegging for my last days off for the holiday season. Before long I had a few slices of pizza, a coke, and a thriller film on and I was already feeling better.
Funnily enough it was right around the same time as a cheap jump-scare in the movie that the first Thing happened. The living room had giant windows with no curtains, since there were no neighbors for quite a ways. Out of the corner of my eye, I see a small child in a pink coat approach the window. She seems around 5 maybe and presses her nose against the glass to watch me. I’m a little out of it so I don’t react immediately and it takes me a moment to realize that she’s real. She has no emotion or expression on her face but she waves at me and tries to speak.
I go to the door to see what she wants. She asks me if I can play with her, which is weird. I decline her offer and she asks if I have kids that can play, which is less weird. The owner of the house did have children but they had just moved and there were no toys or other indications that any children lived there.
When I told her that she would have to come back in a week or so to ask again, she just stared at me and slowly turned to walk away. I stood there and watched her go and was rather puzzled at why she would walk all the way over by herself at 7:00ish. I lost sight of her pretty quickly when she disappeared into the dense fog.
My movie ends and I put on another one. I soon fall asleep with the cat on my lap.
I’m jolted awake again by booming thunder. At first I think it’s the movie, but the TV is off. The rooms lamp is off, too; as is the heater and the digital clock in the kitchen. My phone has full charge, thank god and it tells me it’s 2 in the morning. It is raining buckets outside and the thunder/lightning storm is intense.
After grabbing a big blanket and the poor, skittish cat, I sit in the living room and enjoy the show. I can’t see very well but when the lightening strikes, the silhouettes of the trees are very clear. The rain turns to hail and for a full minute the storm goes absolutely insane.
There is no space in between the thunder crashes and the whole room is lit up again and again. I love thunderstorms like crazy but this was pretty intense. The cat jumps out of my lap and makes for cover.
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rosey-writes · 5 years
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Eliot- Violin, Marimba, Fiyero- Bagpipes, Jason- Harp, Jonathan- Oud, Sparks- Recorder, Matthias- Organ, Axel- Harpsichord, to the mod- Marimba, Hai Lin- Trumpet, sorry for such a long one, you don’t have to do them all!
mSorry I took for literal ever, I wanted to make sure they were all good, hopefully I succeeded! I’ll try to be faster next time Eliot
Bravon’s going to call me an ‘emo bitch’ for this, but- I don’t get sad all too often. Never have. Usually it comes out as me being pissed, which I personally find much more useful. Even at things that do make me sad instead of the much more useful anger, I do everything in my power to turn it into anger- to find a problem and solution and do it. I don’t believe in lying down and accepting whatever happened. You move on and you break whatever did it to you, or you die trying.
As for my ‘defining trait’? I have no fucking clue- let me go ask Bravon and Axel.
(Ten. Minutes Later)
Well Bravon said it was that I’m bottom, and Axel said it’s that I can make great hot chocolate so they’re useless. 
I guess if not those, I don’t fucking know- I guess I’m resilient? If that’s the word? I don’t like inaction, not doing anything to me is worse than self destruction. Humans weren’t meant to take being pushed down, you keep going even if it hurts you more. 
Fiyero:
How sweet of you for asking ❤️
My heritage is my lifeblood. Why wouldn’t it be? Not everyone is lucky enough o be a Deamorte, why wouldn’t I show it as much as I could~ We’ve been celebrities since Venice, what’s there not to be proud of! ❤️ 💖
As for country wise, while I admit I’m not the largest fan of my hair, I love my Irish background from my father’s side, they’re such a fiery people, how could I not? And my mother’s Roman ancestry is the reason I have the gifts I do- the bedrock of civilization and all that. And nothing in this world could compre with the marble streets of Italy.
Of course, I would love to add some more Irish to the family line, right, @liliesinwrittendreams ?
Jason:
Bagpipes? Really? You pick the most lame-ass instrument there is? Whatever- least I got a better ask than Johnny. Good luck to that creep explaining his shitty parents. 
Anyway- pride? In my heritage? I mean, gotta say, I’m white as fuck. We’re Mayflower bitches. Some of the first police officers in the state, went back since for literal ever. Pretty proud I guess, police, generals, pretty badass. But I don’t really like relating to my old man unless I have to.
Fuckin’ dick.
I drink a lot of beer? That count as ‘showing my heritage’? Fuck it, sure, love German beer. We’ll call it that.
Jonathan:
I don’t know why Jason would think I wouldn’t want to answer this, I love my family, all of them, even the...problem child, Jason grew up to be.
Well, not ‘grew up’. He was always like this. Throwing my dolls in the river and all that.
It’s a hard call, honestly, between Jason and my ma, but, I’m sure you’ve all heard enough about Jason to last a lifetime.
[”Jonathan you creepy fuck stop trying to write me ou-]
Ignore him. He got his attention seeking from father.
Besides that, I’d say my ma’s the one who taught me. She fell sick when I was younger, so I was the one who took over the farm work, especially when Jason left to move to the city with father. Seeing her so weak, helpless, the woman who gave life, who held me when I was crying as a child, protected me from my father’s rampages, would jump in front of his fist in the name of protecting her child, I learned just how important it was to protect the weak.
That’s why I know it’s my callin’ in life, protecting what can’t protect themselves. Animals, children, weaker adults. Even if my mother is no longer in this world-bless her heart- I’m still around to keep her legacy around. 
And, if I can say anything about it, I’m goin’ to make a world safe for people like her.
Sparks:
Oh, gosh, I-I, I don’t remember much of when I was a kid. I spent a lot of time inside, we were traveling all the time, s-so I didn’t get much of a chance to make friends. I had a lot of siblings, though, who were always with me, I loved a lot! I don’t keep in much contact with them anymore, my older sister, Mai, tries to call me sometimes but, u-usually it’s to try and get me to join It Works...
Oh! I remember it. It’s like a really really specific thing but...
When I was a kid, really young, I got picked on a lot. I was kinda weird, had- have- a gaptooth, didn’t really get other kids. A couple kids started messing with me, pushing me to the ground and I hurt my arm really bad on the school steps.
I guess...I just remember really clearly how I felt in that moment. Well, that, that I didn’t feel. I’d seen in every movie, seen other kids in that moment, they’d cry, they’d feel bad and...
I didn’t.
I wanted to. I tried to talk mean to myself while they did it. I repeated the names they called me, I called myself ugly and stupid and a freak, but, I couldn’t make myself sad. It was weird. I wanted to know what sad felt like, if nothing else than curiosity. 
That was when I realized why I was different, I think. I didn’t know why mom was taking me to doctors before that, I didn’t understand. I do now though. It’s been hard but, I’ve worked through it. I just needed an ù̶̟͋p̶͇͈̑d̷̦͊a̴̠̳͗̔̇t̶͇̬͆́e̷͇̜̋͑̿.
Matthias: 
LOL, thought you said Organ. Like, ya know. A dick. Is a dick an organ? BRB, gotta google that.
Tumblr media
Well I’ll be danged.
Anywhoswhatevers. Blowy thing. Duuude, we watched the Ring, it was sick. Dad and I have horror movie Mondays, which, yeah, tehcnically god doesn’t like or whatever, but, dad says as long as we get permission from the pastor ahead of time, we’re good. 
And, when ya’ got the pastor’s nudes, anything is good by him.
It’s so funny, that movie scares the poop out of anyone, so watchin’ dad watch it was so freaking funny. Wish I had a vid. He started crying once, unplugged the phone, it was great. 10/10, would recommend. V good.
Axel: 
I got one! ;LDKFDSAKJ That is so cool!!!!
This whole thing is cool, I haven’t heard a harpsichord, what’s that? It’s like a super big piano right, with ploppy keys? I should learn to play one- it’d be so cool I could play that cool song from Rainbow Rocks with the siren peopl-
Eli says I need to get back on point because he has homework 
Oh...when I was told I was ‘weird’? It’s not super happy I guess but, I get called that a lot at school. There’s a group of girls who like making fun of me a lot, say my clothes are all raggy trash and stuff, and throw stuff at me, say I’m weird...but it’s okay! I don’t mind really, if they think I’m weird- they can think I’m weird, since it makes them feel better!
If I’m weird, it means they’re not, and not feeling weird is nice, so, it’s got to make them feel good to throw things at me right? That’s what matters? Right?
Right?
Hai Lin:
Blog. You people. Started. A blog.
I’d say I’m surprised, but honestly- this is not the dumbest thing you people’ve done. Not that it says much.
Alright, though, I’ll bite. Sue’ll be happy about it.
Honestly? I’d say I’m almost there. I’ve clawed my way from poverty to queen of the underworld, there’s not a soul who wouldn’t refuse to kneel before me...well, one who’d live to say anything about it. 
I guess, if there’s one thing I do still wish for though, is a life for my little sister. I know she doesn’t like this life, even if she knows little about it, but, I don’t want her forced into the same world I was. I want to give her a good, safe, life. 
I know sometimes she gets swept up in the romantic idea of the thief, she thinks she’s the kind to swing from masts and find a Romeo and Juliet love story, with her as the criminal and them as the good boy, but, I just can’t see her as anything other than my little bird. Maybe that’s on me, but, that’s the last milestone I have before I’m where I feel I can really rest.
Rosie! (Me)
Fun fact, when I first signed up for band, I tried to get the Marimba. I cried trying to hold two mallets because I have really sensitive skin thanks to childhood eczema. Then tried Timpani, couldn’t figure it out, freaked out, quit, and refuse to go to the half of the school where the band room is to this day. 
I know. I’m a wreck. 
My defining trait, I’d say, is probably my...for lack of a better term, ‘fuck it’ mentality. I’m the kid who, and this is true, rolls around school in Heelies with a yeet or be yeeten shirt. I was voted Most Unforgettable for Senior Superlatives. Generally, in life, I try to assume that nothing matters so I may as well have fun with whatever I’m doing :)
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theklancecollection · 6 years
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Keith & Krolia Modern AU
Keith is an only child who lives with his mom
he doesn’t know much about his dad; his mom refuses to give any concrete answers save he loved you very much but now he’s not here
he used to care a lot when he was younger
on father’s day when all the kids would make glittery cards for their dads, keith would come home empty handed
when he learned about families, he was taught the nuclear family code; how every normal family has a mom and a dad and a baby and they all live in a big house with their cats and dogs
keith came home crying that day because he didn’t have a dad or a big house or a cat or a dog
his mom marched her way to the school the next day and had a long talk with the principal about the wrong messages that are are being delivered to the children
you don’t need to abide by the nuclear code to be considered normal
a normal family can have two moms or two dads, or no parents and only grandparents; or siblings/caretakers/guardians or just a single mom or dad
there is no rulebook that says there needs to be a mom and a dad in order for the child to be happy
the principal argued back, stating the child’s mental well being which pissed krolia off
keith ended up changing schools in the middle of the semester
since it’s just the two of them, they live in a small, but cozy, apartment
he loves the view of the setting sun
the entire flat would be bathed in a deep golden light
during summers, they pull out a mattress and sleep in the living room since their rooms become really stuffy
the fan will be on full blast but it’s no use; so they will have the windows open
they can hear the cars zooming past and the occasional siren
keith is more of a sportman
after school, he will drop in only to chug down a cold water bottle before he dashes out to play with his friends
loves playing basketball
he prefers doing his homework when his mom is home
krolia comes home by 5 / 6 pm max
she hates making dinner
when she comes home, she just wants to sit back and relax
keith’s teenage years were a nightmare for her since that boy ate like a vacuum cleaner
he would inhale rather than properly chew his food
she loves summers as she can just walk around in her shorts and tank tops
she loathes winters because of all the layers she has to wear
they love watching horror films together
their halloween preparations begin as early as september
they don’t care much for thanksgiving; it’s all about the scares and thrills for them
they will hit all the stores and buy huge bulks of various chocolates, treats and flavored popcorn
but they don’t share any of it with the trick-or-treaters; they hoard it for themselves
keith loved buttered popcorn for the longest time until he switched over to chex mix
it has everything
kroila loves spiced popcorn
every friday and saturday night, they will cuddle together munching on their goodies as they go on movie marathons
if either of them scream loudly and hide behind the other, they don’t say a word about it the next day
krolia is scared of all kinds of insects while keith is terrified of clowns
he fucking hates pennywise with a passion
he’s not scared to admit, he had to sleep with his mom for a whole week after he watched It
they love to play pranks on each other
they try to up the scales with each prank
krolia purposely put in a red sock in the washer making all of keith’s clothes turn pink
he was teased about it for about a month
keith bought a bunch of rubber spiders, threw them on his mom’s bedroom floor when she was asleep
she woke up to the sound of skittering and screamed at the top of her lungs seeing all the “spiders”
keith recorded the whole thing and never let her live it down
keith loves going on hikes even though his mom doesn’t want him to go on his own
there’s no telling who might be out there
he still goes and one day he’s actually followed by a creepy, looking guy
he manages to get away but when he comes home, he’s a mess
krolia yells at him a lot that day
from then on, all hiking adventures are saved for the weekends and during the day time
keith hates all the science
he likes his social studies class more
he only manages to pass his science classes because his mom is super smart and is able to dumb everything down for him
they like to cook together
tacos, enchiladas, pizzas (anything that can be assembled really)
they don’t have the patience for long duration meals especially during school days
during summer times, they like to experiment a lot
krolia loves to bbq
keith always brags about his mom making some of THE BEST bbq foods ever
wings, steaks, kebabs etc. she’s a PRO
keith loves to make popsicles, smoothies and milkshakes
they both love waffles over pancakes
BACON and turkey sausages are a MUST for them
saturday mornings, they laze around in bed
keith would bring their breakfast and they will slowly re-energize
they spend at least an hour just finishing up their meals and watching cartoons
if he’s really lazy, he’ll just bring bowls of cereal (honey bunches of oats with crispy almonds)
if he’s feeling a bit fancy, he’ll make scrambled eggs, toast (buttered for him not his mom), some fruit (they both split a banana and share the grapes and strawberries) and have a side of bacon (he can never get the sausages right)
sundays, they have to get their asses in gear and get all the chores done
usually means laundry, sweeping, cleaning out the bathroom etc
keith takes the longest showers
he would spend hours pampering himself with all the scented shampoos and conditioners
kroila had to learn the hard way to get her ass out of bed and into the bathroom before he did
on her really bad days, kroila loves to take bubble baths so that she can de-stress
she’ll light up the candles, use her special bottles and crack open her favorite romance novel and playing calming music
keith knows not to disturb her during this time
kroila hates grocery shopping
she never knows what to get
once she’s in there she feels like a black hole as she wants everything
once she went out to get a tub of ice cream and brought home some yuccas instead
so keith ends up going along with her much to his chagrin
she’s okay with all other forms of shopping though since she only gets what she needs
they have a monthly ritual where they alternate between picking out a new restaurant to visit
keith loved the last caribbean place they visited a lot
he earned a fond taste of spicy foods while kroila needs things to be on the sweet and sour side
keith’s mom works at a hardware store and is very knowledgeable about fixing things
she would often be called on by people in the building for help
she’s able to make decent money this way but she chooses not to
she’s often invited by men who are lusting after her
once, a man followed kroila home and tried to force his way in
keith, who was about 6 at the time, was frightened but kroila was able to fight the man off with no problem
she called the police and filed an official complaint on him just to be safe
even though he was scared, keith had a baseball bat in hand, ready to strike in case his mom needed help
kroila got teary eyed and after locking the door shut, hugged her boy really tight
they both cried and huddled together that night
kroila tried teaching keith the basics on how to defend himself but he kept holding himself back whenever she urged him to attack her
she enrolled him to several karate and martial arts classes
keith’s favorite show at the time was power rangers
he would imitate the fight sequences the rangers performed
he would get yelled at every time he broke a vase / lamp
when he was 11, he asked his mom if she ever wanted to get married again or have a boyfriend or something
she didn’t; she was perfectly happy with what she has with keith right now and truthfully, doesn’t think she can make time for a relationship
she just doesn’t feel attracted to people that way anymore
keith isn’t entirely sure what she meant by that but he didn’t push it since he was happy with the answer he got
part 2 || part 3
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luci-is-a-devil- · 7 years
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Vampire!Joshua
Notes: thank you for the request! I think Joshua and jun are the more difficult ones for me to write… I hope it came out well! Thanks for the request nonnie! Requests are open!!!
tw: guns and slight violence
•when you were little, you remember having to go to the doctor a lot so they could take the blood •you had an excess amount of it, also being type AB, meant that you could give to anyone •so your blood was greatly appreciated and sure that was nice knowing that you were saving lives, but you were terrified of needles •your friend, seungkwan told you that if the needle was dirty it could get you sick, and you would die •even though the next day when you told your other friend Vernon who had been absent, he told you that was wrong, that doctors needles were sterilized, his mom said so •nonetheless you weren’t fond of them •at all •you just wouldn’t look at the needle, or at the doctor •you’d insist on wearing a face mask, and short sleeved shirts •because that would air the wound out??? •kids are weird man • •even into your early twenties, you didn’t like needles •two time a month, you’d go get blood taken, maybe more if you had more than usual •you had decided since you were little to become a nurse, since you spent a lot of time there anyway •studying was difficult, but you were the top of you class and became an intern at an amazing hospital •now began crazy hours, rude patients, and barely eating •and being surrounded by needles •Fun •but the best part of the job, was most definitely the boy who worked in the cafe that was inside the hospital •Hong Joshua, aka the best hot chocolate maker in the cafe •coffee was bad for you, but it kept you awake, something that you needed but you refused •so hot chocolate and other sweets to keep you up and running •wary in the morning you’d get your beverage, chat with the brunette who spoke softly with a cat like smile •today’s topic so happened to be mythical creatures •"I think it would be cool if mermaids existed, but then sirens would too. Cool but slightly terrifying.“ •you said taking a sip of your hot chocolate as you spoke •Joshua was wiping down tables as you sat on a stool by the counter •"I think werewolves could be cool, or fairies.” •Joshua said, spraying the table with a cleaner and scrubbing a tough stain •"team Edward or team Jacob?“ •you asked jokingly, not expecting an actual answer, since the two of you had talked about your dislike towards the franchise •"…Jacob. Edward doesn’t do vampires justice.” •Joshua said, walking behind the counter, walking into the back, he put away the supplies •"you say that you like you’ve met one, josh.“ •you said laughing, taking the last sip of your now warm hot chocolate •"yeah… I mean they sound cool?” •he said awkwardly, adding a nervous laugh at the end •sending him an odd look, you jumped off your stool, waving goodbye to him •you began to walk home, to sleep for a few hours before returning to the hospital •your apartment was tiny, the living room and kitchen wasn’t separated by a door, the bathroom didn’t have a bathtub •it was just the bare essentials, after all you were only an intern •laying on the couch, you fell asleep, not even bothering to change • •you could function of five hours of sleep, but you needed a shower • badly •so you went and showered, scrubbing your skin with a orange blossom body soap •rinsing it off after you felt clean enough, you put soap in your hair •then rinsed that off and turned off the water, hopping out of the shower •getting dressed back in scrubs wasn’t the most fashionable but what could you do •so grabbing a small apple, and leftovers that you could heat up in the microwave at the hospital •you left your small apartment, and walked back to the hospital, where you came from seven hours ago •sighing, you shook your head •your converse padded on the cement, a rhythm coming as you walked •humming along with the padding of your feet, you enjoyed the walk to the hospital •looking at the huge building before you entered •as you walked through the hospital, you got a text from your boss •boss: hey kid, sorry I actually don’t need you to come in tonight •groaning at the text but simultaneously being happy that you didn’t have to work tonight, you texted back •y/n: okay, thank you for letting me know •deciding to get your cup of hot chocolate and have a chat with Joshua, since you wouldn’t be here tonight •walking into the small cafe, you expected the boy to be at the counter or to be playing the guitar at a table since it was a slow shift •what you didn’t expect was Joshua sitting at a table, drinking out of a blood bag •"please tell me that you’re drinking tomato soup out of that.“ •you asked, startling the boy who had zoned out •"yep! Haha, I just really like messing with people! Yep!” •He said awkwardly, nervously laughing in the middle of his sentence •sitting down at the table he was at, you raised an eyebrow and waited for him to explain •"I’m a vampire, but I don’t like drinking blood from people because it hurts them. So I have to drink these?“ •he mumbled, not looking at the you, his eyes drawn on the table •"is that why you said Edward was a bad representation of vampires?” •you asked after it was silent for a while, you could see the tension in Joshua’s shoulders as he nodded, saying that not all vampires are creepy old man who stay in high School •staying and chatting with him was still the same, now there was just some extra characteristics that he had •if it was just you two hanging out, he would let his fangs out, drink blood packs •but of course, you’re a little curious piece of shit •on late nights you’d wonder what it would feel like if Joshua sunk his fangs into your skin •or just remembering the boy with eye smiles for days, with a cute smile and beautiful hands •you were a little bit in love •but who could blame you, everyone was probably in love with Joshua •the boy could sing and have birds land on his finger and sing along with him •but it was just an unrequited crush, after all you guys were just friends • •evening hot chocolate with Joshua, working until three am, leaving with a wave towards the cafe was routine •the streets were always cold, lined with light posts, the artificial light was the only warmth you felt •your phone was in your hands, a promise that you had to make with Joshua so he wouldn’t be worried •he was number one in speed dial, but you had done this walk hundred of times •nothing should happen, right? •you could feel it in your gut that someone was watching you •quick steps were made into a sprint, wanting to get away from the unwanted gaze of a stranger who’s intentions were unknown •reaching the front of your apartment, you slowed down •maybe you were overreacting, no one was probably watching you •you just needed more sleep, or no more horror movies late at night •but a small step forward would leave your fear come true •"Don’t move and I won’t shoot.“ •a cold voice spoke, a male holding a gun said •pressing number one, you called Joshua and put him on mute, wanting to come out alive •"give me your wallet, give me your whole bag actually.” •doing as he said, you slid the bag to him, after all a cheap bag was nothing compared to your life •and you still had your phone •"Now I want your phone, I know it’s in your hands, so don’t do any funny stuff.“ •you spoke to soon, hesitating on giving him the phone, he cocked the gun, letting you know he wasn’t playing •sliding it the same way as you did with the bag, he picked it up, seeing that he was being heard, he started to yell •"you fucking bitch, wanna die?” •you wanted to ask if that was a rhetorical question, but you’d never get that chance •a bullet entered your chest, another in your leg •falling on the floor, you were left hearing his footsteps as he ran away •blankly thinking about how you’d never be able to see Joshua again, after all this was it •years of being afraid of needles didn’t prepare you for other deadly weapons •before your eyes fluttered shut, you could’ve sworn that you caught a glimpse of Joshua running toward you •his brown hair looking like he had run his hands through it, his lip had been chewed on •weakly smiling, you felt like you were floating •your last conscious thought wondering if Joshua was an angel in disguise, no one could be that beautiful • • •the first thing you saw when you opened your eyes was Joshua •his eyes weren’t their usual chocolate brown, instead being a dark green •his fangs were out, but what startled you more was his hand being on yours •"y/n.“ •his breathed out, and If you could only hear him say your name, you’d be okay •"Joshua” •you spoke, your throat itching as you whispered his name •the relief on his face made you want to pull him close and kiss him •sitting up, you groaned, your chest hurt, your neck hurt •bringing your fingers to your neck, you felt two small holes, equal amount to Joshua’s fangs •"josh? What happened?“ •you questioned, immediately his eyes avoided yours and you were reminded of that day many months ago •his hand was still on yours, squeezing it softly, trying to reassure him •"when you called me, I was on my way home, so when I heard what was happening, I rushed to your house, only to find you…on the floor but…” •he trailed off, tears filled his eyes, and this time you do what you wanted •slipping of the bed, you crouched on the floor, ignoring the ache in your leg •both of his hands in yours, you looked into his eyes •"I know, it’s okay.“ •you spoke, not needing to know the rest of the story, with the fang shaped holes in you neck, you could guess what happened •a sob racked his body, as you comforted him to the best of your aching body •when they was no more tears to be cried, both of you were on a bed •(which you later found out was his) •"hey Joshua?” •you spoke softly, pulling Joshua closer into your chest as you cuddled •"yeah y/n?“ •his voice was mumbled and kind of hiccupy •"I like you.” •you were already kind of dead, what was the worse that could happen? •"I like you too.“ •everything felt right, lying in a bed with Joshua, as he listened to where your heartbeat should be beating •you’d have forever to help ease the pain from him having to turn you • •"DoEs tHiS meAN tHaT I caN’t dRinK hOt ChOcolAte AnYmOrE???” •"I love you y/n?“ •"I live you too but NO HOT CHOCOLATE JOSHUA???” •you’d get used to it eventually •right???
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It Section Seven
Chapters 16-18
1. Why does Mr. Keene want to see Eddie in his office? How does Eddie react to their encounter? Mr. Keene wants to tell Eddie that he isn't really sick. He says he's gone along with the charade long enough. Eddie's doctor might not be brave enough to stand up to Eddie's mother but Mr. Keene no longer feels comfortable lying. So he explains to Eddie what a placebo is and tells him that's what's in his aspirator. He says that it isn't really medicine but it helps Eddie because it's his brain that thinks he needs it. Mr. Keene thinks that Eddie's mother is determined for him to be sick and that's why Eddie's doctor prescribed the aspirator in the first place. So basically if Eddie stops listening to his mother's insistence that he's sick, he would actually be alright. And Eddie doesn't take this well at all. He basically thinks Mr. Keene is crazy (though some small part of him thinks Mr. Keene might be telling the truth but he dismisses that pretty much instantly) and he Won't Hear Any of This and then runs out of the drug store.
2. How does Eddie break his arm? He's on his way home from the drug store and his mother always gives him a dollar so he can stop in and get two candy bars and a soda. So he's going to do that when he sees Henry Bowers and company. Well, Henry is aLL KINDS OF UPSET about the rock throwing and since Eddie is all alone, it's the perfect chance to get his revenge on his one of the Losers Club. So he starts attacking him but then the shop owner comes out and tries to stop him. But, unfortunately, Henry is literally crazy and also a little bit bigger than the guy so he just shoves him out of the way. Well, Eddie takes this opportunity to make a run for it and that's when Henry and company start chasing him. He had a pretty good lead but then he tripped over a kid on a tricycle and they caught him. Henry then proceeds to break Henry's arm but then they hear sirens (the guy at the store said he was going to call the cops and apparently he did) and so Henry and company leave without inflicting more damage. But still. They broke Eddie's arm =/
3. What did Patrick do when he was five? What has he been keeping in the Amana refrigerator? He murdered his baby brother when he was five. He didn't care that his parents had another child; he cared that his schedule changed and, mostly, that his meals were late. So one day he came home and his mom was taking a nap. So he went in to see the baby, who was also taking a nap. He noticed that the baby, Avery, was sleeping on his stomach with his head turned to the side. So he just turned Avery's head into the pillow. He did this, experimentally, a few times before he just held it there, until Avery died. Then he went about his business as his mother, hours later, discovered Avery's death and it was ruled a crib death. And Patrick discovered that he had a taste for killing so he started stealing the neighbors pets and locking them in the Amana fridge down at the dump until they died. He would take them down there, lock them in and then check on them until they were dead. Eventually, though, he stopped stealing pets and started taking animals that were already dying or were sick because they wouldn't be missed.
4. What happens to Patrick? So Henry hinted that he knows Patrick's secret and what he keeps in the fridge. Well, Patrick decides he needs to get rid of the evidence. The only thing currently in there, so he thinks, is a pigeon. So he plans to take it out and bury it. But when he opens the fridge, it's full of these, like, giant macaroni noodle looking things. It turns out these are It parasites and they start attacking him and he's screaming and bleeding and ends up dragged off to be eaten by Pennywise. Well, Beverly is watching the whole thing and she can't really tell what is happening? But she follows him and one of the parasite things attacks her too but she gets it off. So she follows the trail and finds evidence that Patrick was taken. But she doesn't find his body and when she hears Pennywise laughing, she gets out of there.
5. What do the Losers discover when they open the Amana refrigerator? Beverly tells the rest of the Losers Club what she saw and brings them back with her. So Bill ties a string to the refrigerator door and they all hide and he pulls it open. Well, the parasites are gone and, instead, the fridge is filled with orange pompoms and written on the inside of the door, in blood, it says: STOP NOW BEFORE I KILL YOU ALL A WORD TO THE WISE FROM YOUR FRIEND PENNYWISE
6. What do the Losers make in preparation for their meeting with It? They melt down one of Ben's silver dollars and make two little pebbles with them so they can shoot them at It. They also had a contest to see who was the best shot and Beverly won so it's decided that she will be the one to shoot It with the bullets.
7. What happens on July 25th? The Losers go to 29 Neibolt Street to face off with It. They go in through the basement and make their way through the house. They see a few weird/creepy sightings but when they finally reach a bathroom (behind which has to be the layer of It from the smell alone), they see an exploded toilet which is how It has been coming to the surface. It makes an appearance and it's clear that it's really after Bill. But then Beverly goes to shoot it and Ben steps up to protect her. He gets scratched across the gut and ends up bleeding pretty badly but Beverly does shoot it with one of the silver bullets and it disappears back down the drain. They know that they haven't won yet and they'll have to face off with it one last time, very soon. But they, at least, won this round.
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  Section Seven Reading Journal
So I know that I picked this book but I am seriously ready to be done with this book. The fact that there are still 300 pages left, astounds me. Why???? What could you possible have in 300 pages besides more of the same??? It’s not like the last 800 have been exactly riveting.
I was honestly hoping this was going to be an actual face off with Pennywise. But instead it was like 20 pages of buildup for a half a page of battle before It jumped into the toilet. This is not at all the fight I was looking for.
And, honestly, just from what I’m seeing in the gifs, it looks like there is way more story in the movie. Unless a few of the gifs I’m seeing happen in the next 300, it looks like the movie actually has more progressive buildup. Which is what I wanted from this book.
All of that being said, I am glad I’m reading this book because I would’ve always wondered. I’ve heard a lot about this book and it’s literally hailed as one of the greatest horror novels of all time. But I’m just really not impressed?? I guess I like what other people have done with this story better than what Stephen King did with this story.
So. I’m just ready to be done with this book and on to something that isn’t so unnecessarily long and repetitive. Because, honestly? This book doesn’t need to be more than 300 pages. That’s how much story has actually been in this book. 300 pages worth. Everything else has just been unnecessary and, in my opinion, boring.
It’s getting harder to actually pick up this book and force myself through the sections. Can we just face off with Pennywise already? Please. Because I’m ready to read literally anything else. /rant
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THIS IS NOT A TEST: Ranking THE PURGE Films from Best to Worst
It’s been 5 years since the release of The Purge. A groundbreaking horror film from Blumhouse where all crime in America is made legal for one grisly night a year. Since then, the world of the infamous crime night has been explored through 3 different installments; The Purge: Anarchy, The Purge: Election Year, and this year’s The First Purge. Four films in, I’m taking a look back through the murderous universe to determine where the movies rank in the series. Be warned, SPOILERS are abundant. Lets get into it!
  4. The First Purge (2018)
It’s hard to really expect greatness when viewing the fourth entry to a film series. Even with low expectations, The First Purge still felt like a missed opportunity. What’s truly missing in this film compared to its ancestors is anything unique. We’ve seen this movie before. The New Founding Fathers of America (NFFA) once again play the villainous role, sending out mercenaries to “get the murderous ball rolling” so to speak. This time, they target a cast of economically-poor residents on Staten Island, who must power their way through the killing convoys.
Unlike The Purge, Anarchy, and Election Year, there’s no special plot device here to separate it from the pack, other than it’s the “first” purge night. Also lost, and perhaps most importantly, is James DeMonaco’s directing. DeMonaco took a politically-charged idea and turned it into horror in an expert fashion. The First Purge simply isn’t scary. In director Gerard McMurray’s vision, missing are the visually stunning & creepy environments, the claustrophobic set pieces, and the overall sense of dread. What’s left can only be defined as a political action film with slasher elements, with a sprinkle or two of horror.
  3. The Purge (2013)
The Purge films are a bit of an anomaly. How often does it happen where the first movie of a series come in at 3rd place? There’s no mistake here. The Purge plays out as a home-invasion suspense/thriller based on the concept that what the perpetrators are doing is legal. That’s really all that the idea of a country-wide “purge night” is needed for here. Fresh off of bare bones budget hits such as Sinister and Insidious, Blumhouse Productions continued the trend here. Unlike those films, however, you can really feel the $3 million budget constraints in this one. With an idea bursting with possibilities, we are stuck in Ethan Hawk’s house as his neighbors break their way in.
Don’t get the wrong idea, there are fantastic concepts here that birthed what we all know and love as “purge night”  (the unsettling masks, the AWESOMELY SPINE-TINGLING alert siren, etc.). The Purge just can’t outrank the following entries in my ranking because it is frustratingly contained in a world begging to be explored. In a way, Blumhouse and co. really nailed this one if their true intentions at the time were to launch a Purge film series.
  2. The Purge: Election Year (2016)
The change from #3 to #2 on this list is a huge one. In Election Year, the world of “the purge” is wide open. The American public is becoming disillusioned with the annual purge, and are about to elect a presidential candidate who has promised to put an end to the night. The NFFA see the writing on the wall, and make a nefarious change to the purge night “rules”; no one, including high-ranking government officials, are off-limits.
While the plot of the government trying to assassinate a political rival seems to fall into my complaints about The First Purge, there’s so much more to like here that I forgive it. Most importantly, action takes a backseat to horror in Election Year. The plot expands to include a shop owner and his immigrant protegé out to protect their deli from destruction, a vigilante ambulance service, and an underground resistance to the NFFA. In addition to a tight and fulfilling plot, Election Year may boast the strongest cast of the film series altogether, including the return of Frank Grillo and Edwin Hodge. Lastly, the film is shot absolutely beautifully and captures a horrific atmosphere. Director James DeMonaco’s importance to the Purge series cannot be overstated.
  1. The Purge: Anarchy
As a horror fanatic, I keep a ranked list of every horror film I’ve ever seen. Right along with the ranks of Halloween, The Thing, and Insidious sits The Purge: Anarchy. The second entry in the series, this film gets everything right. Breaking out of the claustrophobic home setting of The Purge, the second entry takes the story to the streets of Los Angeles. There, Sergeant Leo Barnes (Frank Grillo) decides against seeking revenge against the drunk driver who killed his son, and instead guides a group of survivors through the infamous night.
Anarchy contains everything you ever wanted from a Purge film. The visuals are phenomenal, as the empty streets of LA at night make for a truly haunting setting. The “purgers” are terrifying. The cast puts together a great performance, as I connected with the characters and wanted them to survive the night. The climax of the film, playing out like a vicious game of laser tag, rates by far as the best of the series. Lastly, we get an extremely satisfying final sequence where it’s revealed Barnes spared the life of the man who took so much from him, and the man saves him in return. B-R-A-V-O. Anarchy realizes the Purge series’ full potential, and belongs among the great horror films of our time.
  How would you rank The Purge series? Let me know by following Nightmare on Film Street on Twitter and Facebook, and leave your rankings there!
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