#but my dad must not have been ok ig

[meshlasolus]

Your Beauty Never Ever Scared Me

Dbf!Joel Miller x College!Reader

A/n: Listen… I don’t have any excuse for ditching my other three active series except for tiktok made me do it… That, and the CLM series by @macfrog has ascended me to a new level of crazy and I just needed an outlet for it somewhere. Another shoutout to @theatrelove3000 who keeps putting up with my dbf joel shenanigans, they are indeed insane.

Warnings: girl this whole concept should be a warning but anyways… age gap, some fluff, light smut, uncomfortable situations with readers father… probably some editing mistakes bc ya girl is tired ok its 2am

Please be kind to this chapter, I actually like it, despite the horrors.

Decided on the song ‘Mary On A Cross‘ by Ghost for this one bc it fits ig.

MASTERLIST

Age gap is approximately 15 years or so, reader is over 21 and joel is about 37

"I think I'd probably only slow'ya down," you chuckled, looking to Sarah who seemed to read the displeasure off your face from your dad's offer. "I'm studyin' to be an archeologist, dad. I don't know nothin' about framin' and all that house buildin'..."

Maybe it had been your dad's idea, but he wasn't the one who planted it into his own head. Joel subtly turned to you and cooly uttered a response.

"You could work on interior stuff with me."

It had been almost three days.

You looked out the window to the front of your house repeatedly to try and remember it clearly. The drive home, the kiss, and how abruptly it ended with a promise to see each other around. You thought about it so often you almost wondered if it happened the way you perceived it, if any details had been skewed in your mind simply because you wanted to keep it there, fresh, untouched. Maybe he thought of it differently... but maybe he didn't.

"Did you bring home the stuff I asked ya?" Your dad came into the kitchen with a smile, embracing you with a side hug and turning to help you unpack the groceries.

"Course' I did, Pa," you handed him the bag with the six-pack of bud and the other one full of snacks.

It was the first Rangers game night, and as per tradition, that meant the company of the next-door neighbors. It had been a while since you'd been around to enjoy it, but now that you were back, there were quite a few more reasons why you were on edge to now participate. It would look weird if you came up with an excuse not to be there, and you knew that. You also knrw that you'd gotten into a rather complicated entanglement with your father's closest friend, and weren't sure what the outcome really was.

Had that driveway light not spooked you both apart, and had that little black stray cat not made an appearance, how far would it have gone? Things were pretty heated, but even still. Would he have said something? Maybe along the lines of 'I've known you since you were sixteen, and this isn't appropriate at all.'

You didn't have time to think about it, you were set to work on helping your dad cook dinner for the soon-arriving neighbors. Dinner and a baseball game, once a relaxing and enjoyable time to bond with your dad, now turned into an anxiety fest where you were convinced you'd have to walk on pins and needles around every topic.

"So," your dad piped up from his silence at the stove, stirring the pot of chili he'd been prepping. "Joel told me he gave you a ride 'few nights back."

You knew it was harmless, and that he wasn't asking for any reason, other than that he was probably curious. You hadn't seen Joel in a while, not since two Christmases ago. Your dad had driven up to Dallas to spend both Thanksgiving and Christmas with you last year, and you didn't come home for summer break given an internship opportunity. You must have seemed different to the man in some way. All grown up.

"Yeah, gave me a ride n' saved me at the bar," you chuckled, trying to seem playful and unsuspicious about the encounter.

He seemed to be confused, his brows furrowed and a funny look on his face.

"Whad'ya mean he saved ya?" he of course was continuing to speak all the while dumping his favorite spices into the pot of chili, looking across here and now to keep engaged.

"Just scared off some weirdo who couldn't take no for an answer," you let a sweet and genuine smile fall across your features, but didn't let it get out of hand. Your relationship with your father was airtight, and he could read you pretty damn well. You weren't going to give anything away, not with what was potentially on the line.

"Glad he was there," he replied with a chuckle, sending you a soft glance. "Never thought you'd have grown up so fast, now I gotta carry a shotgun whenever we go places. Fend off the wild beasts."

His jokes were only so funny now, because in this situation, you knew he wouldn't hesitate to shoot Joel if he found out what had happened. All in the nature of protecting you, but it made you sad to think of the situation that way. Joel wasn't just another weirdo following you around at a bar.

"It's only because I'm so pretty," you did your best to respond lightheartedly, making a quip that would soothe the silence. "And I believe that's yours and Mama's fault, givin' me the genes and what not."

You'd finished chopping a nice garden salad by the time the doorbell rang. You ran upstairs to change your shirt to the Jersey your dad bought you for your birthday, claiming it was good luck for the team. Truth be told, you didn't wanna be downstairs when Joel and Sarah got here.

Sarah was here, too. Her, you could easily handle. You were almost hoping that she would be in a rather talkative mood, that way the attention could be swayed to her inconspicuously. You doubted Joel would even try to talk to you, anyway.

"Lovebug, come on down, Millers are here!" Your dad shouted up, even though he saw you run upstairs right when the doorbell rang to change your shirt.

"I'm comin', hold on," you replied sassily while heading for the staircase.

You got to the bottom and had to take a breath before turning the corner into the entryway. Joel stood there with a sweet smile to you, and you tried your best to hold back the one you wore. It was too bright, too happy to see him. All despite your nerves.

You were quickly embraced by Sarah, whom you paid immediate attention to.

"My lordy, girl," you held up your hand by your shoulder to show the height difference, "last time I saw you, you must've been this tall."

"Dad tells me I'm growing like a weed," she tossed a finger over her shoulder to where he was standing, and you gave him a small glance and a smile.

"Us daughters do have a tendency to grow up," you laughed, slinging an arm around Sarah and pulling her along to the kitchen as your dad and Joel did the same behind you.

Why had you been so anxious? Joel is happy to see you. He makes causal conversation with your dad, but he catches your eye every chance he gets. His expression doesn't change, except for the tug of his lips in a smile that's barely there. Joel doesn't smile too often, except apparently when you and Sarah are around.

It doesn't take long for everyone to get situated with their food at the table, playful banter between Joel and your father filling the air as you made less rambunctious chatter with Sarah.

She's doing pretty well since last you saw her. She was always a bright girl, but as she grew it became more apparent that she would probably excel further than anyone in her graduating class. You were sitting across from a future valedictorian, you were sure.

You'd tried to ask her about her out of school interests before your dad interrupted with a question.

"How about you, lovebug?" He watched your eyes flick over to him with a turn of your head. He added context, given you hadn't been listening to them earlier. "Are you gonna look for a summer job?"

You really should, if you're being honest. There's not much work in your aspiring profession located here, but you weren't as lucrative as you used to be, given your educational expenses.

"I've thought about it," you tilted your head back and forth, and your dad seemed to need more from your answer. "I need to earn some cash before I get back to Dallas, but I'm not really sure where to apply."

Sarah seemed to know where this was going before you did. She'd been around the last time your dad was begging Joel to find some help for the contracting team they worked with. But surely your dad doesn't expect you to build houses, does he? Your dream job is to dig holes in the ground, not fill them in and put homes on top.

"We got some spaces to fill, you should come work with us 'few months. The pay's good and you don't have to stay on long, probably just till the end of July."

You gave him a look, and he instantly knew you weren't interested, but you figured you'd try and justify your reasoning. It was an argument either way.

"I think I'd probably only slow'ya down," you chuckled, looking to Sarah who seemed to read the displeasure off your face from your dad's offer. "I'm studyin' to be an archeologist, dad. I don't know nothin' about framin' and all that house buildin'..."

Maybe it had been your dad's idea, but he wasn't the one who planted it into his own head. Joel subtly turned to you and cooly uttered a response.

"You could work on interior stuff with me."

Did he just-?

"S'not much more fun than what your dad's been doin,' but at least it's out of the sun, and easier to learn."

You were almost dumbfounded. Your dad offering you a job that potentially could give you heat stroke with your lack of experience seemed like the worst idea in the world... but working on interior projects? With Joel of all people? Well, that didn't sound so bad.

You didn't want your dad to catch on, of course. Being so protestant of his suggestion, but then falling right into it as soon as Joel was the one to offer would be a dead giveaway to some sort of favoritism to his best buddy. It simply wouldn't look right.

"What kinda interior stuff?"

He smirked. The motherfucker was smirking. He knew you'd changed your mind, but couldn't exactly just come out with it. He understood, but it was still slightly amusing to him.

"Flooring, cabinets, countertops... 's things like that," he explained, knowing you really didn't care what all it entailed. He was still happy to play along. "S'not as fun as archeology, but it pays alright."

You nodded, acting as though you were turning the thoughts over in your head.

"Well, if you're sure I won't mess it up, I'd be happy to try it out," was your final response. You figured it left some leeway in case your father became suspicious, but gave a good enough answer to end the conversation on.

"That's my girl," your dad clapped a hand on your shoulder in excitement. Truth be told he would very much enjoy your presence on a work site. "I'll go ahead and call Eddie in the morning, let 'im know I found someone to replace Charlie for interiors."

It was said more to Joel, you figured, because you didn't really know who either of those people were. He'd nodded to your dad, taking a sip of his beer and then looking back to you. You smiled sweetly, nobody catching it but the one it was meant for.

"Game's gonna start soon," Joel spoke aloud, drawing everyone's eye to the clock over the stove.

Sarah cleared her throat before jumping in on the conversation.

"About that," she looked to her dad with the same puppy dog eyes she used to use against you. He was just as poor at saying no to her when she pulled those bad boys out. "Sammy texted me to ask if it's okay to stay over at her place tonight?"

Joel sighed. He knew that no matter the attempts he made for her to like baseball, it wasn't her thing. It was summer vacation, and he had no reason to say no, so he didn't.

"Is she coming to pick you up?" He began, fishing his keys out of his pocket to drive her if need be. The girl lived five minutes away, he'd be back only a few minutes after the game started, but he didn't really want to leave.

"I can ask her," she pulled her phone back out of her jeans, opened her screen, and checked her messages.

"No need, I can take you," your voice rang out, standing from the table and taking your bowl to the sink. It was a genuine offer, but it was also to get out of the house and process what just happened with the job situation.

Joel was the first one to stand up with you.

"You don't have to-"

"It's fine," you cut him off, leaving no room for discussion. It was lucky he liked you, otherwise, Joel Miller might have put up quite the argument for such a small dilemma. As was his way, of course. He huffed, but accepted he had been overruled.

"Thanks, then." It was mumbled, but there was gratitude in it.

"We gotta hop over to ours real quick and grab my stuff," Sarah told you, waiting for you to return from the kitchen before beginning to head out through the front door. You'd grabbed your keys off where they hung on the wall before going behind her.

"I'll be back soon," you called over your shoulder into the house, and got a chirped 'alright' reply from your dad.

You walked out passed your driveway, seeing the light flicker on as you both went passed the censor on the ground.

"Y'know, I didn't think you'd have caved so fast on that job thing." She had piped up once you were almost to her porch. You found it only slightly funny that she chose the exact topic which had been swirling in your mind since it happened.

"Not sure I really wanna do it, but your dad made it sound better than every time my dad's talked about it, guess he just convinced me," you chuckled, playing it off in a way that she absolutely was about to use against you.

"That's another thing," she turned to you as she backed into the house through the door, only turning once she was inside. "Since when are you friends with my dad?"

She said it in a joking tone, but having known a few things she didn't about interactions that occurred between you and her father, you felt constricted to answer seriously. Probably with a lie if need be.

"I've always gotten along with your dad," you gave her a confused look, accompanied after by a playful smile.

She grabbed her backpack and opened it, checking to make sure she'd taken all the school stuff out before starting to shove things in, her charger, headphones, etc.

"Yeah but... you're just all young and cool and stuff," she shrugged, turning around to walk towards the staircase. "My dad is all old and boring and only talks about baseball."

"Thirty-seven isn't old, babe. My dad is two years from fifty, and I don't even think he's old, yet. Boring? Maybe..." you reasoned, hearing her laugh before she sprinted up the stairs, giving you time to think of some answers before she asked any more questions. Had she really caught onto you that fast? You didn't think you'd acted noticeably. If Sarah was able to see it, then maybe your dad did, too. You needed to be more careful, in that case.

Sarah returned a few minutes later, her backpack now stuffed and her pillow under her arm. You nodded out the door and headed back to your driveway to open the door for her, seeing as though her hands were full.

-

The drive after Sarah had been dropped off felt so much longer. Maybe it was just your thoughts, or maybe you consciously drove slower to avoid getting home too quickly. Your dad was waiting, but above that, Joel was there, too. Probably sitting back on the leather couch, relaxing with his feet kicked out on the floor. He usually leaned onto the armrest with his elbow, and held his face against the hand it supported. You'd noticed it years ago. He only ever spoke up when your dad did, usually in reply to him.

He was content simply watching the game in the presence of a friend. It was endearing.

When you pulled into the driveway, you had come up with an excuse to not remain downstairs for the duration of the game. It was too risky, and you weren't apparently as good with self-control as you'd thought you were.

You went inside and hung up your keys on the hook, immediately passing the living room on the way to the stairs.

"Hey, lovebug, you missed the top of the first," your dad called. He knew you liked baseball, so if you were to lie and say you didn't want to watch, he'd know something was up.

"Y'know, pa, I think I'm just gonna watch it upstairs, I forgot I still got some stuff to unpack," you peaked your head into the room to respond, and saw that Joel, just as you had pictured, was sitting in his most usual position on the couch, feet out on the floor, arm up with a hand holding the side of his face.

"Can't you do it later?" Your dad pleaded, but you knew, seeing as how your father occupied the recliner, you would have no where else to sit but on the floor or next to Joel. You didn't trust yourself with that.

"I could, but I might fall asleep if I wait too long."

He sighed, throwing an arm in your direction and shooing you away. He wasn't annoyed, but he'd admit he missed watching these games with you. It had been like a tradition, but if Sarah wasn't here either, he wasn't gonna make you stick around.

"Sure you don't wanna stick around? We could use your lucky jersey down here," Joel piped up, lifting his face from his hand and giving you a pair of soft eyes. That was exactly the reason you would not be staying. He didn't even realize how much he affected you, but you'd make sure he did at some point. Maybe you could just tease him a little.

"You're right, it would be a shame to take the lucky jersey with me."

You walked behind your dad's chair, out of his sight, and tauntingly stripped the jersey over your head, revealing the tight black tank top beneath it, just like that night at the bar. Joel's jaw clenched and his eyes turned darker, even under the bright light of the flatscreen in the living room. You never took your eyes away from his as you slung him the jersey.

"Hey pa, can I get you anything from the kitchen before I go upstairs?" You leaned over the back of his recliner, looking at him upside down. He chuckled and shook his head, trying to move your hair from obstructing his vision.

"We're all good, lovebug," he spoke in addition to his physical response, his laughter dying down as you stood back up. "Come on down if you change your mind."

"I'll probably be down later," you spewed a half-lie. You weren't sure if you would be or not, especially if Joel was still lurking in the living room.

You gave those brown eyes one last look before heading straight upstairs.

You grabbed your remote and flicked on the TV. It was already on the right channel, so you tossed the remote aside onto your bed and flopped back into it. You didn’t actually have anything left to unpack, but they would never have known.

Your phone buzzed beside you, and you lifted the screen to your face to see a text from an unsaved number:

Missin you down here…

You’d never put Joel in your contacts, because in highschool, your friends thought it was weird to even text or call him regularly, but you had his number for years, always just as a backup. You’d known it by heart, now, and nearly had it memorized back then, too, for the times you needed his help.

I’d come back if there was an open seat.

A bit sassy of a response, maybe, but you were hoping he’d understand the hidden meaning behind it… Although, Joel didn’t usually pick up on those things very easily.

Open seat right next to me

Yeah, that’s why I’m up here…

You huffed, realizing it wouldn’t be that easy. The three little dots indicating his next response was on the way slightly nerved you. Maybe he took the last text you sent the wrong way. You didn’t mean it to sound badly.

What’s that supposed to mean?

Means that I can’t keep my hands to myself.

You quickly rectified the situation, although you might have gone too far. He was taking far too long to answer, now. The little dots that before nerved you would now be your saving grace if it meant he would just fucking respond, already. You dropped the phone on your chest, raising up and down in a scattered rhythm while you wiped your hands over your face. Your phone vibrated over your shirt and you immediately opened it.

I can’t either. Stay up there.

You breathed out a sigh of relief. He was thinking the same things you were, and likely was under more stress for it, given he sat right across from your dad, responding to his comments about the game here and there. Your dad had no idea what was happening right under his nose.

Wasn’t thinking about leavin.

This little back and forth went on, the majority of the game, in fact. It was more-so about the plays then on, because you didn’t have anyone to talk to up here.

Joel thought it a bit funny, your dad would say something oddly specific about one of the players, and then you’d text him right after saying the exact same thing. You’d been a product of watching baseball with your old man for just about ever.

“I’m thinking about gettin’ some tickets over the summer for a game or two. They’re always cheaper in them group packages, you n’ Sarah should come along,” your dad was barely paying any attention to the words he spoke, but they came flowing out anyway, clear and cool. “Could be fun.”

Joel knew that there was only so much group interaction he could handle with you, and you with him. It stands to why you’re upstairs, an he’s down here, fist wrapped tightly around your lucky jersey. All out of your father’s sight, of course.

“It could be. Don’t think Sarah’s much for baseball anymore, though.”

He’d hoped that your dad would drop it. Halfway through his third beer, he hoped the man was a little more than tipsy, and maybe didn’t even mean the words he was saying.

“Doesn’t mean you can’t still tag along,” your dad was definitely still sober enough to keep it up, although the way he spoke became slower. Maybe he was getting sleepy.

“I’ll think about it.”

His response was followed by a hum, then a lull of silence that endured the rest of the game. He sat all the while and thought about his predicament a bit more.

He couldn’t stop thinking about you. It was insane… like you’d leeched yourself to the inner workings of his mind and he wouldn’t be able to pull you off without hurting himself, too. You were just upstairs, and had been texting him. You were within his vicinity, and yet… so unreachable.

He’d wished for you to be down here, or for him to be up there with you. Obviously, that wouldn’t go too well with the man sitting next to him, but he’d be asleep soon. If he could just touch you again, just kiss you one more time, maybe his cravings would be satisfied and he could go about his days… but what would happen if he kept feeling the addictive urge to do more? What if he was never satiated enough to quit you?

The game was called, and you’d texted him a small ‘victory’ at seeing the Rangers had won.

It was wrong, and the presence of his friend beside him was a constant reminder that you were his kid, and he would have a final say. Even though you were an adult, he understood this was completely taboo, and you should be off with guys your own age... but he’s made up his mind about the thoughts spinning in his head.

He didn’t respond, though. Your dad stood up out of his chair, his arms stretching outwards with a loud yawn as he took a few steps forwards, clapping his hand down on Joel’s shoulder.

“I hate to kick you out…” your father joked, a low and tired chuckle under his words.

“It’s alright, I got some stuff to sort out anyway.”

They started making their way towards the door when light but fast footsteps could be heard coming down the stairs.

Joel turned quickly, a smile on his lips and in his eyes when he saw you trying to catch your breath after sprinting down here.

“Leavin’ already?”

They both laughed heartily. As if Joel hadn’t been here almost three hours, most of which you spent upstairs. Your heart was beating far too fast for your liking, but there didn’t seem to be a way to stop it. Now that you were present again, in the room with him, you didn’t know what else to do.

“Your dad’s half asleep as it is, if I stay any longer I’ll send ‘im into hibernation,” Joel’s response made you giggle softly, although you withheld most of the laughter, because in all honestly, it wasn’t that funny, and you needed to learn to control yourself.

“He’ll be over next week, we’ll talk about gettin’ you into that job.”

You nodded, turning back to Joel as your dad opened the front door. What were you supposed to do? You couldn’t hug him, could you? That’s too much… maybe just wave, or maybe-

He held his hand out… for you to shake it. A hand-shake. Yeah, sure, fine.

You shook it, but he pulled you in half way, tapping your back once and then letting go.

He just bro hugged you. This man just-

He turned and did the same to your dad, giving you one last glimpse as he stepped out the door. Your dad closed it behind him and you were almost clean out of words to say. That had to have been the strangest interaction you’ve had.

“I’m beat, love-bug. I’m gonna head to bed,” he slung an arm around your neck and kissed the top of your head before turning and going down the hall to the stairs. “Don’t be up too late.”

“I won’t, just got a few things to do.”

You waited approximately ten more seconds before running to the garage door, going as quickly and as quietly as you could through to your front yard. Joel was still on his porch when you got out there, but was about to go inside.

You ran out to the sidewalk in font of his house and called out to him, all the while still barefoot.

“Hey Miller,” you crossed your arms, watching him turn around and lean in one direction. “Did you just bro-hug me? Or did I imagine that?”

He stepped closer to the edge of the porch, leaning against one of the wooden beams closest to him.

You slowly walked up to him, tilting your head to side as you observed his stance. he looked rather good. Hair tousled, body adorning a black t-shirt and some dark jeans. He was a sight, even in the dark light of the neighborhood.

“I reckon I oughta’ try again?”

"Seems like the fair thing to do."

“You’re takin’ your sweet time, baby,” he irked, grabbing gently under your elbow and pulling you up onto to porch once you were close enough.

You smiled to him, and wrapped your arms round his neck, over his broad shoulders. He pulled you close, tucking a head into your shoulder. The anxiousness you felt before fell apart, the rapid beating of your heart slowed, because you were comfortable. You felt immense peace in his arms like you’ve never felt before.

He backed away too soon, but still kept you relatively close to him.

“Was that better?”

“Yeah, I’d say so.”

There was a moment of silence, of contemplation, but it wasn’t stiff, and it wasn’t awkward. It was just there, a nice and pleasant quiet, and you standing still with Joel Miller on his porch.

“You wanna come inside a while?”

Sarah wasn’t home, and wouldn’t be till morning. Your dad was probably passed out in bed by now, leaving the opportunity completely open. You had nothing to lose, no risk to be had.

“Yeah, I think I will.”

He didn’t let you go, he just walked you both backwards until he was able to reach the door, reaching with one hand to open it before stepping slightly to the side to allow you entrance first.

“Ever the gentlemen,” you smiled, walking inside before he followed you in.

“Gotta make up for all that nonsense earlier,” he closed the door, taking your hand and walking to the kitchen. He pulled out a stool at his counter and let your hand fall to your side as he made his way to the fridge.

He pulled out two beers and uncapped them with the tool hanging on the side of his fridge. You think you remember your dad buying it for his birthday one year. You can remember sitting in this exact seat many times before, actually. Never alone, though. Never just you and Joel, and nobody else near.

He slid you one beer an you smiled at him in thanks, taking a sip.

“Last time you had one of these, I didn’t know if you liked it or not,” he gestured to his own bottle, drinking some and setting it down on the counter.

“I don’t know, I think it’s growing on me.”

He looked straight to you, leaning both hands on the edge of the counter. You leaned forward, mimicking his more stern face of features before he said anything else.

“I didn’t wanna say so with your dad around, but you look awful pretty tonight,” he spoke the compliment smoothly, but he had to drop his head after he said it. Seemed that giving you compliments alone in the night was something of a struggle for him, since he was blushing still even when he looked back to you.

“I seem to be feelin’ a lot prettier as of late whenever I’m around you. Think you’re just good for my self esteem,” you paused, leaning back onto the stool to take a drink of your beer. “That, or it's just nice to be complimented by a handsome guy like yourself.”

He didn’t seem to believe you. His scoff was loud and heard immediately after your compliment returned to him.

“You think I’m handsome?”

He’d always thought he was average. Maybe even slightly below. As he got older, that notion grew until he felt that maybe he was beyond trying for a woman on behalf of his looks. Perhaps there were women from time to time that would agree to a date, but there were none since Sarah’s mom who actually stuck around, not until you… but you were different as far as relationships go, because technically, you shouldn’t even be considering one with him.

“Absolutely, I do. Why wouldn’t I?” You were curious, because he was clearly attractive. Maybe you’d spent too much time around the more traditionally preferred young men in dallas, but something about Joel intrigued you that never did with anyone else. Maybe it was the forbidden aspect of what you two were doing, but before that, it was something else. He was rough and rugged, and good looking in a mature way that the boys your age couldn’t mimic if they tried. Those dark brown eyes with little crows feet at the edges every time he smiled were a dead give away to his age, but it was so appealing somehow.

“Don’t know. Guess I’m just old,” he spoke, trying to hide the insecurities that phrasing brought about. He was too old for you, he shouldn’t be sitting here with you you alone and calling you pretty, and yet…

“Maybe that’s a good thing. Too many boys my age are still very immature these days.” And it was very much true. Too young, too immature, and too stupid to see what’s in front of them and really appreciate it. Older men have a tendency to take care of the things they have, because they know that with time they can lose them.

“That so?”

“Mhm.”

“They don’t even realize what their missin’ out on, do they?”

You shook your head in reply. Nope. Not a single one of the younger guys you’ve dated has treated you with the care you know he could. He’s always treated you with care, before… why would that change now?

“They probably figure there’s a million girls linin’ up after me that they can take a shot at,” you raised your eyebrows and drank some more. Maybe it was just a thought of some past experiences, but this beer was tasting better and better to you.

“I pity them,” he said nonchalantly, without really thinking about it.

“Who, the girls? I mean, I kinda feel bad, but other times, I think we all know what we’re getting ourselves into n’ we just try to ignore the red flags.”

It was meant as a joke, but he was being genuinely serious.

“No, the guys. I pity ‘em.”

“Oh, do you?”

“I do,” he nodded, thinking of the right words to say. “They lost you, didn’t they? Biggest mistake of their lives and they didn’t even know. Pity ‘em just for that.”

You didn’t know what to say. You figured the wide smile you wore was doing a fine enough job, but he wasn’t looking like he had anything else to voice yet.

“You think I’m somethin’ special, Joel Miller?”

He set his bottle down on the counter and walked around it to stand right in front of your barstool. He took both your hands and pulled them to his chest, just holding them there and looking to you with the sweetest expression you’ve ever seen from him. He’s so different than what you remember in your earlier years. He used to be so stoic and serious. Sometimes even a little grumpy. Guess time changes things.

“I wouldn’t be gettin’ myself into sum’ this crazy if I thought anything else,” he mumbled it almost, but he definitely meant it. His words rang true in every aspect of the implications they made. This was crazy, it was very unlikely in the first place, but even still, it was happening. Neither of you backed down, neither of you said no.

“If it helps, I happen to think you’re pretty damn special, too.”

He didn’t respond, just leaned closer towards you, nudging his nose against yours, before letting your lips meet in a kiss. it washed rushed and hazy like the last time. It wasn’t forceful or fast or anything of that sort. It was gentle, and it was meaningful. All the years he’d known you, but never like this. You knew this attraction was new, but it was still real. You wondered how many women pined after him over the years, only for you to now gage his attention when clearly no one else did. The man’s been single since Sarah’s mom left, and otherwise, you didn’t know him to be much of a ‘dating around’ kinda guy. Standing here with him, now, you felt such excitement in knowing he’d pursue you, the off limits woman, over anyone else. It was a true victory, or at least you thought so, sitting on a stool in his kitchen while he kissed you softly, his thumbs going over the backs of your hands that still lingered in his.

When the kiss broke, you inhaled deeply, the scent of him so close to you, surrounding you. He was like a warm blanket you just pulled out of the dryer. He was comforting, and soft, and his skin was currently hot to the touch. You could only hope that you had something to do with that.

“Baby,” he breathed, hands letting go of yours and finding a new home at your waist. You left your hands on his chest, feeling his heart rate fluctuating. “Gotta know something before this goes any further…”

You hummed in response, still trying to even your breath intake. He backed away a few inches to be able to look you in the eyes correctly. He’d spent enough time with you in the past to know if you were telling the truth, and he was going to use it just this once to his advantage.

“What we’re doin’, you sure you’re okay with it?” He knew better than to jump into this without clarification. “Don’t want you feelin’ pressured if you’re not.”

“I want this,” you spoke softly, just loud enough that he could hear. “Promise.”

You had thought you’d been the instigator to this, if memory serves you correctly. Even still, you know now that whatever happens, he won’t take it somewhere you don’t want it to go. This show of good faith was something you could put trust in him over. He’s a good one, you always knew that.

And again his lips were on yours, differently this time. It was a bit more hasty and fervent like the first time, but there was still something different from then that you couldn’t quite decipher.

You absent-mindedly opened your legs and he instantly came between them, letting your bodies become flush with one another. His hands ran up and down your sides, every once and a while dipping to your hips and somewhere below on your thighs.

There was a heat between them that you didn’t realize was there until he came so close to touching it. He never actually did, though, and you were both endeared by and upset about it. He was the one making that heat spread, he can’t just leave it there… but he’s testing his limits, and you think it’s respectful that he is.

He doesn’t want to cross any lines… as if this entire entanglement has not already done that. This situation in every sense of the definition, has crossed the line. Him hugging you that tightly on his porch, him inviting you in after dark when it’s only you and him alone, having a beer with some very personal conversation, and now making out with you in his kitchen. They all crossed the line of what should happen between a man and his best friend’s daughter.

“Tell me to stop,” he mumbled against your mouth, almost as if reading your mind. His hand on your thigh drifted between your legs, just barely caressing the heated pool sitting there, waiting for him. It was still very reserved, and you had to buck against his hand for more friction, but at least it was something.

The taste of him somehow made it worse, the feeling growing inside you without an end in sight. The arousal was evident, but you weren’t sure he would be able to do anything about it, yet. You could tell it was weighing on his mind, what was okay for him to do, and what wasn’t. You would beg him if you had to, you just needed more.

He had an idea, one that could allow both of you to explore this dynamic easier, and one that could potentially keep him from overstepping like he was afraid to.

He removed his hands only for a minute, bringing yours up and over his shoulders before he settled his back down below your ass.

“Hold on,” he told you, lifting you from the seat and walking until he got to the living room. From there, he let the space guide him until the back of his knees hit the edge of the couch. He sat almost abruptly, and when you relaxed your weight onto him, you felt the stirring between his legs as well. You moaned into his mouth at the mere size and feeling of it, beginning to slowly grind down onto him. He encouraged your movements, and used his hands to guide your hips as you went, back and forth, getting into a rhythm.

“That’s it, baby,” he praised, tearing himself away for a moment to expel his breath from his lungs at the new feeling. Your head fell against his, and suddenly it was the movement of your lower half taking you over.

He let his hands move over your body a bit more freely, now, but still careful not to make any harsh movements, or grab in places he felt he shouldn’t linger too long. He knew you wanted this, but something inside him questioned how comfortable you really felt… that was until you started doing the same, roaming his body with your delicate touch, making him feel like the most important man in the world. You could have sworn you marked the exact moment he snapped, rolling his hips upwards into yours shamelessly. It was so deliciously addicting, the feeling of his body pleasing yours, and vice versa. His rough and sturdy hands, though still gentle, ravished any part of you available to him.

The air between you was hot and thick, and you could swear that by breathing it in, you were drawing even more arousal into your body.

The motions kept going until there was a quickening of pace brought on by you both simultaneously. You couldn’t mark a distinction of when it increased, you just knew that the speed you were going wasn’t where you started. All you could think of was that your spend was fast approaching, and you wondered if his was, too.

“Gettin’ close,” you murmured, barely able to get the words out for the moans that slipped passed your lips. “M’gonna…”

He heard you, and understood. Truth be told, he’d started getting hard since that moment on the porch, so this was just nothing but sweet relief to him. He kept on, trying to meet you at your finish.

“Let go , baby.”

You had no qualms about being told twice when it came to him. You gave it up easily, the muscles in your body contracting when you felt the wash of utter ease through every inch of you. He tensed beneath you, but relaxed with a groan of relief right after, and you could feel his length twitch in his jeans.

You just dry-humped Joel Miller on his couch. Like a horny teenager. What the fuck.

The dawn of realization was cut short by his hand softly coercing the back of your neck, bring your lips back for him to claim as he did earlier. Soft, and gentle, no rush, no heat. Just that feeling between you both that started this mess.… and it was indeed a mess.

“You wanna stay over?”

-

Tags (open):

@justanothersadperson93 @moonchild-warrior @hopplessilse @brittmd115 @michilandcof @untamedheart81 @just-someone-broken @joelalorian @xybil @yvonneeeee

If i tagged you wrong, or you want to be taken off at any time, just lmk!!

#joel miller x reader #joel miller smut #joel x reader #joel the last of us #dbf!joel miller x reader #dbf! joel miller #joel miller age gap #pedro pascal fluff #pedro pascal smut #pedro pascal x reader #pedro pascal

[lovinbarzal]

THE GREAT WAR

kacey dutton x fem! reader

summary: kacey always told y/n he only had eyes for her so what happens when he comes to the ranch only to announce he got another girl pregnant?

warnings: angsty, not very happy ending?, not kayce endgame sorry ://, ab4se, and john dutton

i'm not a huge fan of this lmao but enjoy ig

i also just realized i spelt kayce wrong but i'm too lazy to fix it sorry 😞

masterlist

Y/n and Kacey had gotten into a fight which caused Kacey to storm out.

He was gone for exactly 2 weeks before he arrived back home. Y/n had just gotten back from riding around the mountains.

"Kacey!" She jumped off the horse and bolted for him. She jumped onto him and held him close to her but was quick to notice that he didn't return the hug.

"Are you ok?" She questioned running a hand down his chest. His eyes softened.

"We need to talk." He said as Y/n furrowed her brows. The two walked into the house since no one was currently home.

Somewhere in the haze, got a sense I'd been betrayed

"Darling, I'm sorry." He said as she shook her head and paced.

"You slept with another girl, got her pregnant, and all you can say is sorry!" Y/n screamed as tears pricked her eyes.

"I was upset about our fight so I got drunk and it just happened." Kacey explained but Y/n was already upset.

"Fuck that! I cried about you! I was worried about you and where were you? Fucking another girl!" She yelled as John and Beth walked in.

"Who got who pregnant?" John asked taking his hat and coat off.

"Your son, sir." Y/n said calmly while crossing her arms. John thought of Y/n as one of his daughters since he was best friends with her Dad before he passed.

John didn't say anything. He walked up to Kacey and punched him square in the face. Y/n looked down and grimaced. It wasn't unusual for John to hit his sons and she knew better then to interfere.

"You know better, Kacey. Get out!" John yelled and Kacey scrambled to his feet before running out.

"I'm sorry, dear." He said placing a kiss on her forehead before walking upstairs. Beth was long gone probably with Rip so it was just her.

She walked outside to see if Kacey had left. He hadn't. He was sitting on the porch with his heads in his hands.

"I'm sorry. I didn't think he would hit you." She said sitting next to him.

"It's not your fault. I'm gonna go. He doesn't want me here and I don't think you do either." He said standing, hoping that Y/n would argue and say she wanted him there.

She stood and walked back into the house.

That was the night I nearly lost you, I really thought I lost you

Years later...

Kacey never thought he would see Y/n so when he saw her attempting to train the horse he found, he was shocked.

"Fuck." He mumbled seeing her fall off the horse. He ran to her, with Tate following, as she layed in the same spot.

She was fine. She justed wanted to take a break for a second.

"You ok?" She heard from a voice she knew all to well.

"Peachy." She said sitting up. She got back on the horse and started slow. She didn't notice the kid with him.

"What are you doing here?" Y/n asked as she went in circles slowly.

"Came to see my dad, have you seen him?" She laughed.

"He's probably in the house." She said leading the horse to the barn. She jumped off and took the saddle off the horse. She turned around and saw Kacey with his son.

"You must be Tate." She said bending down to his height as the boy nodded shyly.

"I'm Y/n." She said tipping her hat in his direction.

"You look like you would make a fine cowboy." She said standing up.

"I'm an Indian." He said and she raised a brow.

"Cute kid." She said directed to Kacey who looked down.

"Y/n!" Someone called as they walked out of the barn. Ryan turned the corner with a smile.

"The boys are wondering if you wanted to play poker with us." Ryan asked with a smile which made her smile.

"I would love to but Lee asked if I could go riding with him, Jamie, and John. But I'll swing by later and kick all of your asses." She said crossung her arms. Ryan shook his head with a smile before running back to the bunks.

"You and Ryan?" Kacey asked as she shrugged.

"Fuck no. He's my best friend." She said as the three walked back to the house.

"Monica left me." He said walking towards the bunks.

"You must be husband of the year." Y/n said walking next to him.

"I wasn't boyfriend of the year either." He said as she laughed lightly.

"You sure as hell weren't." She said as the two reached the Bunkhouse.

"Well, goodnight, Kayce." She said turning to walk away.

Kayce wanted nothing more then to kiss her but he couldn't. She wasn't his anymore. She was her own person.

She wasn't his girl.

#yellowstone #luke grimes #Spotify #kayce dutton x reader #kayce dutton #lovinbarzal writings

[reflections-in-a-critical-eye]

Right, I'm back. I didn't post anything yesterday because I thought it's best not to rush. But it was indeed fascinating to see reactions in real time to the photo. Yes, I'm talking about the photo posted on IG of JM, JK and another person.

I think I must have read opinions that varied on a entire spectrum and expressed quite vehemently. It's safe to say everyone has really strong opinions and you either condemn it or you're totally fine with it, as long as you pick a side and don't question anything. In sitautions such as these, the tendency to add just a touch of conspiracy is right there. And it gets a pass when there's a lack of information, a language barrier, etc.

I too have my own questions and observations, to which I don't necesarily need an answer, but I'll just write them down.

1. I couldn't help but think of how deep the level of social media stalking is in this fandom. I looked up the account immediately as I saw a screenshot because initially there was confusion about the source. That guy made no previous photo uploads of either JM or JK. At a first glance, there is nothing to connect him to them. And still he had fan accounts following him, before it all blew up and he gained a lot more. My question is, how did that happen? Are there people who look up Jimin's followers list and they try to figure out if there's someone from an inner circle? In all those 50 million people? Do they check some select few accounts daily to see if there's a possibility of a post? The logistics of this are giving me a headache. Or maybe there's some obvious, easier answer and I don't know it.

2. Considering that the account is public, it's not like the photo is leaked. I don't know exactly the nature of the relationship that man has/had with JM & JK and I do not wish to make any speculation with regards to his intentions.

3. I think the outrage was mostly caused by jikookers bringing back to the surface that old photo under the heart arch. Which indeed paints a certain picture, but it's also not the most incriminatory thing out there. I don't think there's any real actual danger, considering that it was supposedly taken from Jungkook's dad Kakao talk. If that's true then it means the dad was ok with showing it.

3. What I personally believe should not have happened was to circulate that photo so easily on social media. People knew about it for a long time, even before someone posted it on I-Jikook twitter. But in cases like these, the photos will always be revealed. They will leave the group chats and out into the wild usually for a petty reason. Because at the end of the day, that's the issue. It has nothing to do with giving a shit about the people in the photo, it's about winning a shipping argument, about screaming "we won". Win what exactly???? It shows who is in it for the fantasy. No single argument could work for them. Replying on and on about deleting doesn't matter.

4. Maybe my last point, but this situation has revealed some things which were already known, but maybe not really articulated specifically all the time. As people not only part of the fandom, but also using social media 24/7, our ideas about privacy and what we should have access to when it comes to public figures has certainly been influenced by the current landscape. In the case of JM & JK particularly, they have been sharing pieces of themselves for more than a decade. It was the BH strategy, the BTS brand. It worked wonders because look at the huge fandom it gathered and the relationship that was built between idol and fan. Hell, Jungkook is doubling down heavy on it with his livestreams. How can anyone really expect a mass of people to really stop and think about privacy? We ourselves as regular people curate our social media image and we voice our opinions and share the places we go to, who are our friends, what parties we attended, when we get into a relationship. Every mundane or special occassion is posted for public consumption. I'm not saying this as some excuse that would justify sharing what looks like a private photo. What I'm saying is that it's to be expected in a way. As harsh as it is, but we live in this reality where the line between the public and private sphere is getting more invisible day by day.

What I think it's scary is that if there's a situation in which an actual compromising photo would somehow be leaked and which can be in the detriment of the people in it for various reasons, so called fans would still share it as proof. Because it doesn't matter for them. It's the high of finding it, of screaming about it on social media, without thinking for more than a second about possible implications. Everything needs to be done fast, regardless of consequences because people need to feed themselves with gossip and leaks.

I'm really just rambling here and not making too much sense. Anyway, I think we should always take a step back and really assess the situation and not scream about it, regardless of our position. Not everything is a threat, or privacy violation or putting people in danger, but it doesn't mean that it needs to be treated lightly as if it's no big deal (which usually comes from people who care more about their own safisfaction and feeling like a "winner").

#m thoughts #jikook #jimin #jungkook

[pianocat939]

Could we please get more of the yandere rottmnt with a younger sibling reader?

Sure! I've been kinda laughing for a while now over some random shitposting haha.

Tw: mention of murder, overprotective behaviour, controlling behaviour, crack and fluff

Some Hcs with Yandere Turtles with Younger Sibling MC

(MC is a turtle mutant for those who don't know)

✦Ramona✦

As we all know, he's the mama of the group. That solo mission episode where Mikey got babied at times? Yeah take that but amp it up.

He likes to carry you around just so he knows where you are and what you're doing. He especially does this if you're in the Hidden City.

Works together with Mikey and Donnie to have a nutrition management system. Primarily because he has a habit of spoiling you.

Bedtime at 10. No questions asked.

"No, you are not going to stay up until 3 AM giggling at videos on social media. Now, bed."

Asian kids, you know how your mom/dad just walks in and randomly gives you cut-up fruits? That's him. Gives you a hug when he leaves.

You are not allowed to touch hot foods/containers, let big bro handle it.

✦Le' bottomsworth✦

The spoiler/rule breaker brother ig.

You need to buy/get something but aren't allowed to leave? He has you covered, just say the word and he's sassily homosexual walking over there.

Teaches you sword art when you guys are free. Lets you win before going in for the "kill".

If you can't sleep bcs it's too early/insomnia then he'll know. He teleports or pokes a head through and keeps you company.

"Yeah so um. Do you have any dirt on Donnie? I need something good to attack him with."

You guys break rules together. It pisses both Raph and Donnie.

Texts you memes at 3 AM with 13 emojis alongside.

If you ever speak about a friend he'll get jealous real quick. He'll start interrogating you and makes up his mind to frame them somehow.

He teaches you self-defense yet does everything to ensure he does most of the actual fighting. He's not risking it.

✦Da Hermione Granger but in Purple✦

Builds you a protective shell whether you like it or not. You will wear it at all times other than sleeping. Oh did I mention there's a camera on the back side?

I know siblings aren't supposed to have favorites but Donnie will have a personal beef meter with Leo. (Right? I'm an only child so idk)

"I'm the favorite. Why else would they come to me every day? Leo, you stand nothing against me."

Tries to teach you about his tech, not only because it's his special interest but so he can brag he's the better parental-brother (oh and favorites).

Loves playing video games with you.

If he doesn't like certain media on your phone/devices he'll eliminate them. Including some of the memes Leo sent.

Shares his playlist like it's the last thing on earth to do.

If you like an interest in something and he notices it he'll buy/invent stuff.

✦Mi Left Gripper✦

Aww, it's your twin. Welp time to activate clingy af.

He whines if he isn't in the same room as you, to the point Raph and Leo have to pry him off.

Loves cooking your favorite meals! It's his way of showing that he loves you so much and that everybody else should burn away.

Draws you a lot too. If you're an artist he likes exchanging art styles, portraits, anything really.

Freaks the fuck out if sees even the slightest inconvenience in front of you.

"OMIGOSH! YOU STUBBED YOUR TOE! DONNIE, EMERGENCY CALL!"

Do you like fashion? If so, please exchange outfits with him so he can take the clothing to his secret shrine of his adorable twin!

Will jump on top of you to wake you up.

✦All✦

No leaving the lair without a trusted member of the family.

Friends can only be friends after background checks and approval.

Daily head pats are a must.

——————————————————

That was really on crack ok. Do you guys like the names I chose? I used all my brain cells for "Mi Left Gripper".

- Celina

#yandere rottmnt #rottmnt #yandere tmnt #tmnt #rottmnt x reader #tmnt x reader #yandere #yandere x reader #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rise of the tmnt #tmnt2018 #raph #donnie #leo #mikey

[sparklingpax]

"Would this make you feel better?" and of course Masterforce for the ask game if you'd like 😄

From this prompt list; yes, requests are still open :3

HII!! I hope this works :D

///

Quick A/n:

-SORRY theres probably typos/mistakes here and there, this was 100% written on my phone; I finally had a good idea for this after two different tries at a story and then being busy with this sudden art project I've taken upon myself to complete hehe (ok unrelated but worth mentioning maybe?? idk--) anyway so. then I tagged along a trip to the park and had like an hour so...here it is ^^''

-set in canon! (insert my usual disclaimer abt what I mean by that ig)

-also, if anyone reading hasn't watched masterforce/did but might have forgotten, it's eluded to the fact that Cab can understand animals in the actual series! Even in a character song!! So...I slipped that in here briefly...just an fyi. I'm not making it up 👍💫

-Writing Hawk being like a kind parental figure is my favorite thing. Dad Hawk Supremacy™ (actually canon)

-Im gonna just put a slight tw for mentions of animal death. Nothing horrible, but it's part of the premise here so...yeah.

-uhhhhhhh.....thats all! Enjoy, I hope...

///

It was all a blur, honestly. 

And when Cab had finally returned to the cavern again…it was too late. 

A shrill wail of horror went up into the air. 

…

"Now, that won't account for irregularities with the alloy when put in contact with the new engine itself." 

"It hasn't been tested to that level of heat yet?" 

"Not quite. So to that, I'd actually like to suggest placing—" 

A loud crash sounded from down the hall, causing Hawk, Ranger, and Diver all to snap upright. Startled, they hesitated to carry on, exchanging looks instead. 

The silence hung for a moment longer before there was another loud noise.

This time, worry had immediately seemed to light Hawk's gaze, and he swiveled sharply in the direction of the door. Something tugged at him to leave the room and see what was up.

Perhaps he couldn't call it "parental" instinct, but it was somewhere in that ballpark.

It had struck him, suddenly, that he hadn't seen Cab at all today.

Though perhaps...this time-sensitive discussion should be concluded properly first...?

But the cloud of worry had already formed, beginning to rain immediately. Hawk was now unable to refocus on the discussion at hand, or the idea of it up again.

Was he maybe...jumping to conclusions?

As if to ask their permission, Hawk glanced at the other two, at the papers, then the door again.

Picking up on this, Diver and Ranger looked to one another and gave a short nod of agreement.

"We can pick this up later," Diver prompted as he reached over and started to fold the blueprints back up. Ranger rounded the table, tapping a stiffened Hawk on the shoulder gently. 

"This isn't so urgent," he agreed quietly. "Let's go see what's up."  

Hawk nodded firmly, gratefully, and took that as a cue to leave the room. He tried to walk out quickly, but found himself almost jogging instead. He figured the others would simply follow, so he didn't think to wait.

Emerging to the hall, he was met with the sight of Shuta's head peeking out from one of the rec rooms. He seemed to be debating stepping out or remaining in place, lip pursed in thought. Catching sight of Hawk and the others, however, seemed to shift his mind to decision, and he scampered up to the three.

"You heard it too?" He asked, blinking up at Hawk as they headed down the corridor. In response, Hawk gave a sharp nod.

They rounded the bend, seeing up ahead a shaft of yellowish light spilling from the crack in the door to the kitchen. Since it was usually the case that doors remained closed when rooms were in use, Hawk deduced that must be where the noise had originated from. 

So far, there hadn't been any other noises, except—

Drawing nearer to the door, Hawk held out an arm and motioned the others to stay back. He leaned forward a bit, listening intently.

At first it was hard to make out, but the sound registered immediately after a couple seconds. 

It was a small, wavering voice….

….crying?

Hawk felt a twinge in his stomach at the realization. 

He immediately darted forward and to the threshold of the open door. 

And immediately, felt his heart drop to his feet. 

Before him was Cab, knelt on the floor, body wracked with each wordless sob that escaped him. His head was bowed, curled over something he was holding. He seemed unaware of Hawk as stood there, or of the others as they slowly shuffled in, gathering behind him. 

Hawk took another step forward, peering closer to see what Cab was holding. He felt himself stiffen upon realizing.

Oh, Cab...

There was a small puppy in his arms, lying haggard....and limp.

Hawk eyes shut for a moment, turning his head downward. He knew without even having to ask or check...its little soul was no more. 

No one dared utter a word.

A weighted air hung about the room, as the depressing sight took away whatever any of them could have mustered to say for the moment. 

Hawk then listed his eyes and looked over his shoulder at the others, giving a sharp shake of his head. They seemed to get the message. 

"I'll...get the simulation prep started, Hawk," Diver murmured quietly, ducking out of the room.

Meanwhile, Ranger had put a gentle hand on Shuta's shoulder.

"Hey, why don't we go finish that program you were trying to show me the other day…"  

He ushered the boy in the other direction with a forced, light chuckle. Shuta didn't say a word back, eyes cast to the ground as he went along and out of the room.

Hawk watched them go for a moment, then turned back to Cab, his heart wrenching the more he regarded the sight. Weighing whether it would be more helpful to ask about what happened or simply remain as a presence, he drew closer until he stood right over Cab. 

I could never presume to understand how much this hurts for him...

Finally opting for the latter, he knelt carefully and slowly, until they were eye-level, and then said nothing for a couple beats. 

Hawk shifted his gaze to regard the animal, its fur matted slightly and its frame thin. Something didn't look right with its body, its bone structure…Hawk looked away again. It hurt too much. 

It was their mission on this Earth to protect those who could not defend themselves. 

To respect and preserve all life. 

To save it. 

And yet…we must still witness death. 

Then, finally, Cab slowly began to raise his head, revealing a tear-streaked face, and an expression of such raw anguish that it made Hawk's breath catch in his throat. There was a look in the boy's eyes that he'd not yet seen. 

For a moment, he almost panicked, not knowing what he should say or do...

Calm down. You just need to be someone there for him.

Hawk stared back at Cab, his own eyes shining with grief. Having known the animal or not, Hawk did regret its passing. 

Wait for Cab to tell you what he needs, if he needs anything. 

And finally, he did. 

"I-I…um…" he reached up to rub at his eyes, trying to wipe away the tears. He took in another shuddering breath before turning his gaze back to Hawk. 

"...I f-found her on the w-way back from, uhm…t-the...store…." 

Every word wavered with the emotion he seemed to be fighting to hold back. It was like mere sticks holding back a flood. 

Hawk simply nodded slowly, patiently. He gave such a calm and gentle expression, Cab felt his breathing begin to even out. 

It was alright, the boy remembered.

In this place, it would be alright. 

He took another breath and continued. 

"S-she was probably a stray, cause...she was just there...starving on that sidewalk, w-walking under people's feet, so…I took her to a…s-safer place..." 

Cab squeezed his eyes shut, dropping his head again. His shoulders began to shake with the beginnings of another wave of sobs.

"I should've never left her alone!" He exclaimed, voicing rising. "I-I was just…trying to get her something to eat, cause...cause I didn't have anything w-with me…" 

Hawk reached out, gently placing a hand on Cab's shoulder.

"It's my fault she's gone," he whispered, brokenly. The choked noise he made, in an effort to hold back his cries, hurt to hear. But Hawk knew it was necessary for Cab to take his time, let it out as he needed, uninterrupted.

"I-I heard her saying she was hungry so I left...I never shoulda left…" he repeated himself, seeming to clutch the animal closer. 

It was with a heavy heart that Hawk realized the first thing to help Cab would be...distancing him from the animal. But for the moment, he simply continued to pat Cab's shoulder, a calming and rhythmic motion that...seemed to be helping.

And finally, Hawk decided to speak. 

"Cab," he murmured gently. "You didn't do anything wrong." 

"But—"  

"..."

"Cab," his tone was still as gentle, yet with more firmness. The boy quieted, as if focusing on Hawk's words before he could start to panic again.

"I know you might...feel that you were too slow in getting this animal what it needed."

"I'm...so sorry, Cab. I'm so sorry you went through this….it hurts and you feel at fault…but don't forget that you were trying to help. That's the most important part of all this." 

He spoke softly and evenly, holding Cab's gaze. 

"All those people in the street, who didn't even think to get someone who could help, that was their choice. You are not at fault for the omission of others." 

One should not be made to feel guilty over what's beyond their control. 

Cab shifted a bit, his breathing having evened out. He seemed in consideration of those words, as if the thought had never once crossed his mind.

Considering the present state of the animal, Hawk surmised it had been beyond saving when Cab had found it. He only hoped he could get Cab to understand...he shouldn't hold himself personally responsible for the unfortunate inevitable.

But Hawk didn't exactly…know how to say that without it sounding insensitive in one capacity or another. Or at least, he was sure of that much.

Hawk considered saying more, but abandoned the thought as quickly as he'd had it. He ultimately figured that, for the moment, letting the words sink in was a better idea. 

And that was the last thing Cab needed at this moment. 

What he needed, was quiet. Gentleness. Patience.

So they sat with the silence for a little bit, listening to distant sounds from outside the room, and out the window. 

Hawk found his gaze drifting to the objects that had fallen to the floor, accounting for the crash earlier. Judging by their positions, it was likely the result of Cab having stumbled into the room without looking. 

Honestly, how could he with what he was preoccupied with? Hawk nodded to himself. Of course, he'd get to cleaning it up later. 

As for—

"Uhm…Hawk?" 

Hawk jolted a little at his name. He'd gotten lost in his thoughts, he realized. He centered his gaze back on Cab.

"Yes?" 

"Can…we…bury her?" 

With something of a sad smile, Hawk felt his heart wrench. It was a sight so bittersweet that Hawk felt tears well up in his own eyes. 

"Would...this make you feel better, Cab?" 

He nodded firmly. He reached up and rubbed at his tears again, now probably dried a bit. He then looked back up.

The smile he gave Hawk was as sad as his own.

"Then...let's do it."

"I think..it'd make her feel better, too."

Hawk gave the boy's shoulder another pat before they both stood up. 

Cab smiled, his eyes shimmering with something complex. Somewhere in there, though, they shone with peace.

A single tear slid down his cheek, as he looked at the puppy again, then back at Hawk.

And Cab nodded. 

///

#super god masterforce #ask game #kuniwrites #kuni talks #kuni answers #asks #fic requests #fanfic #transformers #transformers stuff #tf #masterforce moment òwó 🥺💖✨ #transformers super god masterforce #masterforce #maccadam #writing #writing stuff #hawk #cab #ranger #diver #waverider #shuta #anime #transformers anime #super god masterforce fanfiction #btw! thank you for the req!! <3

[charmixpower]

Ok honestly any rivusa shipper will enjoy the comics and their stories like as a child (I collected the comics from the debut issue and in the country I live every month they would realise a new issue so I’d buy the winx comics every month) I watched the show but the comics made me genuinely love the characters and their relationship ESPECIALLY rivusa and it’s honestly thanks to the comics they solidified their spot as my otp. I mean rivusa have a whole wiki section on the winx fandom wiki dedicated solely to their comic storyline and honestly it’s so iconic. They just have great moments (like I rmb there was one issue where Musa was panicking to look presentable while she was gonna go meet riven in magix city and once she got off the bus to meet him as he’s waiting at the bus stop there’s a whole frame of them holding each other and staring into each other’s eyes and he calls her beautiful😍😍😍 and in that issue when the girls ask about him there’s a whole frame of her heart eyes with hearts in the bg as she raves to the girls “riven is very sweet and kind when you get on his good side” like PLEASE YOUR HONOUR I LOVE THEM SO MUCH and I distinctly rmb from my childhood this issue where the winx and specialists get stranded on an island back In time and Musa and Brandon are knocked out cold and even tho there’s no dialogue riven is just carrying musa to safety bridal style🥺🥺 (I think this ig acc @/rivusa._ did this thing where they screenshotted the moment he carries her in the animated cartoon and in fate and the in the comics and put all 3 side by side and idk there’s smth so fulfilling and heartwarming knowing riven will always carry musa to safety when she needs it in every version of them😭) so yes if you ever have time please go read the comics it really made me love the winx franchise as a whole even more

I've been slowly reading the comics and I'm obsessed with their s1 interactions, tho I mostly open them to see if I can make thematic edits XD

It really shows how Riven is more interested in school stuff over dating, while Musa is easily swept up by crushes

It's really cute. Riven hears something maybe dangerous and he gives it his full focus and Musa is trying to flirt with him because she doesn't think it's dangerous

They have completely different priorities, which I think is a adorable way to keep them apart lol

Omg!! That must of been so much fun!!!

The comics actually involve the assassin's that Sky's family has been so scared of in the story and I'm really excited to see how it includes other details the show glossed over

The more you talk up the comics the more I want to read them 👀

I think all of the couples have a couple part of their wiki but don't quote me on that, it's the middle of the night and I don't feel like checking

OMGGG NO NO NO NO THATS SO CUTE!!!

Musa definitely worries about her outfits, for no reason tho bc Riven is like 😍 abt her always. I imagine the most ideal response she wants to get is looking so good he forgets words exist for a while

Nfkskskejsjskskwjjw Musa and Riven are the epitome of two mentally ill people dating that are just similar enough that they understand each other without being too similar but so different that their friends are like "what???" Riven definitely stuggles to let people in, but he clearly wants to help people by going to RF and it's just 🥰🥰🥰 he doesn't trust people but he wants to protect them and I love him

OHHHHHH JESTER TOLD ME ABOUT THAT COMIC IT WAS APPARENTLY V GOOD AND IM EVEN MORE EXCITED TO READ IT NOW TNX U

Riven's love language is acts of service and physical affection, change my mind. He would never leave Musa in danger come hell or high water and I love him!!! He's doing his best and it's amazing!!! Musa from her actions in s1 isn't used to having people she can rely on so seeing that Riven will always try to help her gives her the warm fuzzies

I've always had this hc that before Musa and her dad start understanding each other, and her dad is still deathly terrified of Musa going the way of her mother if she joins the industry, Riven offers to help her get an apartment. Like no questions asked. You dad sucks? Let's help you move out. He didn't have a clear picture, Musa's dad is over protective the exact opposite of Riven's and he was projecting just a bit, but Musa was all like 🥰🥹 when he offered

I love them your honor that is all

#rus chatters #asks #rivusa #long post

[willel]

I thought Hopper and Bob were stated to be old friends from high school even though they didn't exactly cross paths. Maybe like you said, they knew each other but did not exactly talk while Bob was secretly crushing on Joyce. Hmm... I wonder how they're gonna portray that then? Because from what we know, Joyce did not exactly have a connection to Bob until later on. Are they gonna just kinda change that? If that's not the case it would mean that we're just gonna most likely see Joyce and Hopper together instead, with a little bit of Bob, also I am not sure how correct it is but the wiki says that Bob was classmates with Joyce and Hopper, which is ig interesting. I do not think Bob would be 2-3 years old younger than Hopper or Joyce though because it is said that Hopper and Bob knew each other and were friends to an extent, I think they must have been in the same year for them to meet, but I am not sure. I just wonder how they're gonna connect their dynamic together since Joyce is said to be unaware of Bob's existence whereas Hopper seems to have a more connection to Bob when they were in highschool.

I'm imagining a situation where Hopper is the kid that kinda talks to everyone but isn't exactly super close friends with anyone? The one that's always chill but doesn't get too close.

So it'd make sense if he was friends or friendly with both Bob and Joyce but Joyce and Bob never actually crossed paths/met face to face.

One hour he's skipping class smoking cigarettes with Joyce under the stairs. The next hour he's with Bob in the library as Bob is trying to help him write a paper.

Next hour, I guess he's screwing a girl in the back of his dad old car as he claim he did in season 1.

If I had to guess what they're going to do with Bob, he's going to be connected to Hopper, who is connected to Joyce. Maybe it's possible out of all the kids, Bob is the one that interacted with Henry once or twice. He created and looked over the middle school AV club after all and that seems like something Henry would be interested in.

Then again, I don't think Henry was THAT into it because Will was able to use morse code to get by the Mind Flayer's mental block on him. If Henry knew Will was using morse code, surely he would've stopped him from doing that too. Then again, he was only there for a month, so it's not like Henry could've memorized morse code that quick. It could fit actually.

Bob really cared a lot about the whole outcast thing and being bullied. And how he never stood up to his bullies and admired that Joyce did. I dunno. I can see that coming into play.

Imagine a repeat of season 2. Bob telling Henry,

Bob: If my parents treated me that way. I would stand up to them once and for all. You get me? Don't be afraid to talk to your parents.

Henry: Oh ok. -goes home later that night and tries to murder everyone-

Bob seeing the news: Oh... his parents really were terrible. His dad ended up murdering him. :C

Pfff. Random thought don't take it too seriously. But anyway.

As for the same year thing, that's not necessarily true. Take Robin for example. I think she's a year behind Steve but shared at least 1 class with him. Depending on the high school, the subject, and the student, it's not odd for there to be younger and older students together in the same class. I wouldn't be surprised if Bob was super smart and was put into some higher level classes. Not sure if the concept of "AP class" existed back then but maybe it did.

So it'd be like:

Bob - direct interactions with Henry encouraging him to defend himself, much like he did for Will

Hopper - No interactions with Henry but has interactions with Bob, Joyce, and his parents. We got a lot of Hopper exposition in the show already to be honest so I don't think we need too much more

Joyce - No interactions with Henry or Bob but interacts with Hopper . Will probably learn about her family dynamics and how she came to know Lonnie. May have very indirect connections to the Creel tragedy.

Henry - Might barely appear to be honest, might be more focused on Virginia Creel and an occasional scene with Bob or something

At the very least could make for some fun fanfiction one shots!

#stranger things #joyce byers #joyce maldonado #jim hopper #henry creel #bob newby #theory

[traumasurvivorshelpingsurvivors]

TW a vent maybe? Maybe abuse definitely messy family shit

I feel like my family is abusive. Which is. Weird ig, because it's not physical. The most "physical" it's ever been was lol when I was little and got my mouth washed out with soap all the time for sticking out my tongue. Nothing violent ever happened. Its just words. Words that don't count bc we're "family". Nothing ever matters when it happens to me tho. It's always just something I need to handle by myself. I have to " stop being so sensitive" or "stop fighting back" or "learn to be quiet"... It doesn't count bc it's my siblings or its my parents...that's shit you're supposed to work out on your own. Everyone has family issues so I figure everyone else must be this miserable too.

But I get so tired. I figure ok I'm not made for this life, yknow? I'm too sensitive, so its on me. But I don't like being constantly put down, I don't like it when I voice a boundary and instead of people listeningz they think "oh shoot a new way to hurt this person's feelings! Yay" and not only do they get encouraged for that but I get in trouble for being upset. I don't like being bullied by siblings or by my dad and I don't like how I'm a nuisance to my mom if I complain or fight back when they do it but I'm also nothing more to her than someone to vent to. I don't like that I'm the black sheep of the family. I don't like that I keep getting told that if I'm the only one upset or the only one really hurt, then what happened didn't matter. Bc it's a "majority rules" house and I've never been part of the majority. I feel like I've never been home and I'm so sick of wishing I could be. I don't want to call what I'm going through abusive bc 1. That's scary and 2. I could be wrong and just be another kid getting up in arms over shit that doesn't really matter bc it happens to everyone. Even though I don't even believe kids like that are really running around all the time lol and I'm also an adult. So. Yeah. But I really, really wish someone would just toss me some advice or tell me I'm not just a fucking wimp or say "what's happening is fucked"-I want someone to say " that isn't normal" or SOMETHING. I want help. I want someone to give af. I wanna hear that I'm in a bad situation and someday, Ill find a home. I don't know how to explain it but I just want whatever anyone can offer. If you just post this as a vent and nothing else, that's fine too, I guess I'm just grasping at straws and I'll take anything at this point

-Luci

Hi Luci,

I'm sorry about what you've been through. You don't deserve to go through this. You're right that these things aren't normal.

While I know that a lot of people have experienced soap in the mouth as punishment, it's actually not okay and there are better ways to discipline. Plus, it sounds like unusually cruel punishment for just sticking out your tongue.

Please remember that abuse doesn't have to be physical to be valid, and it doesn't have to be physical to be violent either. Also please remember that abusers are more likely to be people you know, such as family, so being family isn't really an excuse for doing hurtful and traumatizing things. Verbal and emotional abuse are real, and it can absolutely happen within families.

I know you've been told a lot that you're too sensitive and such, but you're really reacting in an expected way because it's expected to cry out if you're hurt. I feel like someone who says "you're too sensitive" is only trying to be hurtful, because they should be more mindful of how that may affect you.

As far as calling it abusive, it's completely up to you how you label or describe your experiences, but it may be helpful to imagine it in a different way. Let's say I'm living in a house with some housemates, and they tell me to stop fighting back, that I'm too sensitive, and to learn to be quiet. They constantly say degrading things to me and violate my boundaries, and they justify it because we're friends. I'm always the scapegoat and when we have meetings they all vote for things I don't agree on. Is this abusive? The answer may be clearer to you. Ultimately, it isn't right. Whether or not you want to call it abusive is completely up to you.

I hope that you can reach a place soon where you could maybe limit some contact with them so they can not only potentially realize the gravity of their actions but you can improve your mental health. I hope I could help, and please let us know if you need anything.

-Bun

#mod bun #trauma talks #tw abuse #tw child abuse #tw emotional abuse #luci

[ericmun]

2022.09.11 Shinhwa’s Eric IG Updates From Kintex + Comments and Replies.  Baby Rabbit Is Coming!

I can’t be the only one to see the sun rising on Chuseok (meaning he’ll share with others)  #Jibbitz #Chuseok #Sunrise #Sunset #spelling is weird #The comments say it’s sunrise so I corrected it #Sunrise

Comments and Eric’s Replies:

OP: Oppa, I think you will be a friend-like dad to your childㅋㅋㅋ I think your child will be even more mischievous than you! 😂 Congratulations😍 Yay, I’m getting a nephew MunEric: I hope the baby will be kind and smart like mom, and cute like dad.

OP: Oppa, congratulations on becoming a father ~~😍 I think you will be a really good father ❤️ MunEric: I think so too

OP: The photos are so nice. What did you think of when you took the photos~ Thank you.🔥 MunEric: I must show to my best friend (Hyemi) *clicks*!

OP: I’m a Shinchang and mother of two kids. I hope you enjoy the spiciness of parenting as well as greater happiness ❤️ I’m happy (I'll be sad if I can't go to concert but I'll raise my kids quickly and go🤣) MunEric: All mothers are respectable. Mommies jjang! (Moms are the best!)

OP: Long time no see, oppa😍 MunEric: I know. It’s been a day, right? (T/N: he teases OP since his last post was just 9 hours ago)

OP: Oppa, show us a picture of yourself!!!!!!🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡 MunEric: You couldn’t find it? You have to look closely

OP: I can't believe you can take such nice photos with an iPhone...😮 I'm also an iPhone user, but why I can’t... MunEric: I recommend darkroom+ It’s a free app

OP: Oppa, you are from Oh family... MunEric: Not oc. It's Mun OP: Ok Lancers...🤷🏻‍♀️ MunEric: How do you know about lancers? Are you from Sunny Hills? OP: I’m formerly from K-Town🫡 (T/N: Eric went to Sunny Hills High School in Fullerton, California. Students at Sunny Hills High are called Lancers)

OP: Such a cutie Mun oppa ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ muneric: mimi_gw  Cutie Mun

OP: Wow that’s so cool! Both the sun and oppa 😆 MunEric: Your eyes nose lips ears (T/N: "Eyes, Nose, Lips" is a song from Big Bang's Taeyang. Eric's reply is a play with "Taeyang" because it also means "sun") OP: I can't believe I got a reply… I'm going to buy a lottery ticket today! If I win, let’s split half and half!!😈 MunEric: If it’s splitting in half, it means it’s 5:5… Who is 5? (T/N: It's probably another word play again) OP: Of course it’s oppa and me 😲Let me win first....ㅋㅋㅋㅋ

OP: I'm getting married this week... !!!!!! I will live a beautiful life like you, oppa🙌❤️ MunEric: Congratulation~~👏

OP: Wow...you took this with your phone!? iPhone!? MunEric: iPhone is the best

OP: If the sun is rising isn’t it sunrise..?ㅋㅋ Anyways, I am so happy you uploaded a pretty photo today🧡ㅠㅠ MunEric: Oh right OP: You replied so quicklyㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ It's okay. It can be confusingㅇㅇㅋㅋㅋ

OP: Oppa, are you using RICOH well? I splurged because of you (?) I am using it well 🤩 As a fellow RICOH user, I’m curious🔥 MunEric: iPhone is the best also... (T/N: RICOH produces electronic products, primarily camera and office equipment)

OP: Oppa, I'm like being jobless but the holiday is almost over 😢😢 MunEric: Resting after the holiday is a true unemployed life

OP: This is late, but congratulations on your new baby! 😍 My life changed(?) because you told me to study hard. I’m a long-time Shinhwa Changjo and the mother of a five-year old🤪.. MunEric: You are so cool~👏

These are Eric’s replies in English.  A baby Rabbit!  Congratulation! 🐰

Source: muneric @ Instagram Translation: EricMun.tumblr

#Shinhwa #Eric Mun #Eric Moon #Mun Jung Hyuk #Moon Jung Hyuk #Sunrise #sunset #Munstagram #IG: Eric #AugTV #Chuseok #신화 #에릭 #문정혁 #나혜미 #Na Hyemi #릭미 #cute dad #mun rabbit born from the peach #rabbit babby #Disney Music

[wonwoonlight]

my daisy / chapter 1 | kim mingyu

➝ CEO!Mingyu x Secretary!Reader

➝ strangers to lovers // single dad!Mingyu // fluff // lighthearted // non idol!au // like pls dont expect any dramas here lol // tiny bit of angst ig

➝ series warning: mentions of sex, no smut but there's implied sexual activities, insecurity (as always jshbdjhsfshbf am sorry), curses, food, let me know if theres more ^^

➝ word count: 3k~

➝ A/N: ok AAAAAAAAA im actually very nervous for this bc this is my first ever series and i finally had the guts to post it bc im done writing all of it, i just gotta edit some stuff. that said, im sorry if i cut the chapters weirdly and etc lol thank you for being interested in my daisy!! Also tbh i decided to post it today to match the 1st anniversary since i started writing svt haha. your feedbacks will always be appreciated <3

when your cousin asks you to be her substitute at SVT Inc. as she takes her maternity leave, you're pretty sure this wasn't what you signed up for.

series masterlist

Seokmin laughs out loud at your story, and you honestly still wish the ground would swallow you whole so you’d never see the light of days again.

“You managed to get a one-night stand with a guy who has the money to get a suite room in Triple W Hotel drunk, and you ditch him the moment you wake up?” he recaps in disbelief. “You should’ve at least left your number just in case he wants to keep in touch.”

You glare at him, making the guy cower if only a little. “What, so I could be his booty call when he’s horny?”

Jihoon chokes on his drink, not used to you talking about your sex life in broad day light. You turn to him apologetically as you gently pat his back, whispering a ‘sorry’.

It’s a little past 1PM now, roughly 4 hours since you leave Mingyu, whoever that guy is, in the suite room and quickly make your way back to your apartment. Not long after you’ve washed up, Soonyoung has called out of nowhere, saying it’s been a while since everyone gets together to have lunch and it’s time to celebrate you finally quitting your job.

“Was the sex good at least?” Soonyoung chirps as he innocently slurps his cola, which earns him a slap on the back of his head from Jihoon. Seokmin hands him a napkin even though he doesn’t bother to hide his laugh.

“It’s nothing,” you try to calm yourself. It’s been hours since you’ve stepped out of the hotel and you’re still freaking out. “It’s nothing.”

It’s still fresh in your mind how some of the staffs greeted you politely when you hurriedly made your way to the elevator. You close your eyes at the memory; gosh, he must be the boss or something if they feel the need to do that to you.

“Hey, it’s okay,” Jihoon tries to comfort you. “You did say you both were drunk, right? He probably understood why you left.”

Soonyoung nods in agreement as he bites into his fries. “True that. Plus, it’s not like you’ll meet him ever again. You just went to that club because of Jisoo, not because you’re a regular there. So you should have no business meeting him the second time as long as you don’t go to that club again.”

“Oh, you made sense for once,” Jihoon says with a mock impression.

“Well, but I do agree with Seokmin,” he grins widely through your glare. “What? He’s probably some bigshot dude and you missed that chance. We could’ve slipped into that life, you know?”

“Don’t Seokmin has some bigshot friends too? You go ask them out,” You shake your head at him and Soonyoung just grins shamelessly at your words.

You look at your phone to check the time, standing up from your seat as you notice it’s time for you to leave. “Gotta go first. Promised to visit Jennie. You both don’t make trouble for Jihoon.”

Seokmin and Soonyoung send you a playful salute while Jihoon just waves his hand, telling you to be careful on your way.

"Say hi to Jennie from us! We gotta see that cousin of yours one of these days," someone mutters, but you're already too deep in your thought to reply.

Soonyoung’s right. You just need to avoid that club and all should be fine. This Mingyu guy, whose touch you can still feel ghosting across your skin, would eventually be forgotten, and you’ll happily live your life as it was before because he’s exactly that: a one-night stand.

”Hi Jen,” you hug her as you arrive in her place. Jennie’s a few months away from her due date now, her stomach rounding because of the baby inside her. “How are you and the baby doing?”

Jennie smiles and her hand automatically goes to where her baby’s at, caressing it softly. “Good. We’re both good. You?”

“Well, I told you a few days ago,” you sigh as you make yourself comfortable on her sofa. “I finally quit my job. Been good to rest for a few days at last.”

You consider telling Jennie about what happened the night before, but decide against it because you don’t feel like reliving the embarrassing walk of shame just yet. Instead, you stand up again to rummage her fridge.

“Have you started looking for new jobs?” she asks. There’s more than genuine curiosity in her voice and it makes you wonder if she’s up to something. Jennie’s always been a close cousin to you, only three years older than you are. She takes care of you like an older sister and you trust her with your life; but it’s not everyday that Jennie calls you to visit out of nowhere.

When you sit down and lean back again, Jennie’s eyes are way too focused on you for it to just be curiosity. “Not really. I’m contemplating if I want to try another job or if I should just apply as secretary again.”

Her famous gummy smile makes an appearance and you kind of see where this is going. “Great, how about working as my substitute when I take my maternity leave?”

“Can you do that?” you blink at her, confused and amused. “Is your boss okay with your way of looking for a substitute?”

“He trusts me,” she shrugs. “I’ve been working there for almost 6 years now and he knows I wouldn’t accept just anyone for my substitute.”

Jennie’s boss must be pretty good then, you conclude. Your cousin is the very definition of perfectionist, the perfect secretary if you’re looking for someone who never misses to make sure everything goes well and nothing is ever askew. On another note, if Jennie’s been working there for 6 years with close to no complaints (at least to you), it means the company is probably somewhere between great and amazing.

You know Jennie makes quite a lot, and even though there are times when she’s slightly overworked, Jennie herself says it’s rarely because her boss asks her to stay. The more fitting scenario is: she and her boss are both perfectionists, which leads to them being the ideal pair for working overtime. Plus, the money she makes from working overtime definitely makes up for it.

“And he’s okay with that?” you smile in amusement. “I mean, this person is going to be his secretary. Shouldn’t it be up to him to decide?”

“He can’t do anything without me,” she rolls her eyes playfully, but there's a fond smile nevertheless. “Plus, I don’t have the time to train someone properly and I know you’re competent.”

You ponder for a while; it is a really good chance, obviously. Jennie works at SVT Inc., which was only established less than a decade ago. Naturally, this means Jennie joined when the company was still making its way up the business ladder. From year to year, the company has been famous for its tremendous and continuous growth and it’s now one of the most sought-after companies despite only having two branches: the main one in Seoul, and the other one in Jeju.

You’ve heard from Jennie that the Jeju branch has only been open for 2 years, the old CEO saw an opportunity and wanted to retreat there and move to a less busy city while his son, Jennie’s boss, took over the Seoul branch. You still remember the way things turned too hectic for Jennie for a while because she suddenly becomes the CEO’s secretary.

“It’ll be a great experience, you know? And it’s just for a few months. 6 at most,” Jennie tries to convince you. “And maybe if my boss likes you, he’ll either extend your contract or offer you another position. I know one of the directors need an extra secretary. Or you might be his PA.”

“When do I start if I say yes?” you decide to taste the water, though you know this sentence only encourages Jennie more and, if anything, she knows you’re pretty much convinced by now.

“Next Monday? Or the Monday after that if you still want to enjoy your unemployment,” she grins hopefully, knowing full well you can’t say no to the tone she’s using. Isn’t she supposed to be the older sister here? “You won’t work alone. There’s another secretary and he will help you adapt once I’m off.”

Next Monday is three days away, you count. You kind of want to rest more, but you actually enjoy working if not for the way your old company was overworking you with minimum salary. There’s just something unsettling about being at home and not doing anything.

“And when will you be off?”

“After training you for a month,” she smiles sheepishly. “I know a month is short. But I’ll be on standby in case you need help, plus I know you’re more than capable.”

“What if your boss doesn’t like me?”

“He will,” she says firmly. “He also has agreed when I say I have someone in mind for my temporary replacement. I’ve told him I don’t want to train anyone else and he can try training the new secretary himself if he refuses my choice.”

It’s kind of amusing to hear Jennie speak about her boss like this, but you know she’s only able to do so because she’s worked hard to get into that position. On top of that, she has probably proven more than enough time that her judgement is rarely invalid.

“You really care for your boss, don’t you?” you suddenly say, catching her off guard.

Jennie’s silent for a while, but there’s a smile in her face as something passes through her mind. “Yeah, I do. I mean, even as a person. He’s a good friend, you know? He’s definitely a friend when he’s not my boss; we got a lot closer three years ago because he went through…something and I had to cover for a lot of his schedules.”

You don’t push further. There’s probably a good reason why Jennie words it that way and it’s probably something that you don’t have to worry about just yet.

But now that she mentions it, you remember that exact period of time where Jennie called you crying because her boss was not answering any of her calls and she had to take care of everything by herself. The only reason it’s clear in your mind is because that was one of the rare times Jennie ever complained about her job. A week later, though, she suddenly said she felt bad for her boss and worked overtime almost everyday for a month without complain.

“Okay then,” you finally say.

“Really?!” she sits up, her eyes sparkling with excitement and gratitude.

“I’ll see you in three days,” you shrug nonchalantly and Jennie moves to sit beside you to drop a wet kiss on your cheek as her thank you.

It should be a great opportunity, right?

The SVT Inc. building stands a little short compared to the buildings beside it, but it’s something that you actually like. There are probably 6 floors, judging roughly from the height, which is great because it means you can go up by the stairs on the rare days you feel like exercising.

You prefer buildings like this than towering offices that go almost as high as hotels, to be honest. There’s just something about smaller offices that brings you in, makes working together a little bearable.

“Hello,” you greet the receptionist as you introduce yourself. “I’m here to train under Kim Jennie…?”

The receptionist mirrors your smile, handing you a temporary access Jennie has requested for you as she tells you to go to the 5th floor where the CEO’s floor is at. You thank her before making your way to the elevator. Thankfully, the building is easy enough to navigate through and you only need to ask one more time the moment you get to the designated floor to find Jennie.

“Hello?” You call to someone, your eyes drop to the name tag he’s wearing: Seungkwan, it reads. “I’m, uh, here to see Kim Jennie?”

Seungkwan looks at you in recognition, immediately outstretching his hand to you as he tries your name. “I’m Seungkwan. You’re going to be her substitute while she takes her maternity leave, right?”

“Yes,” you smile awkwardly, this Seungkwan guy sure seems friendly when it’s your first time meeting him. Kind of reminds you of Soonyoung and Seokmin. “Are you the other secretary?”

Seungkwan nods as he signals you to follow him. “Yup, I hope we can work well together.”

You let out a sigh of relief inside, glad that this guy seems nice enough and looks like someone pleasant to be around with.

“Oh?” Jennie turns to you and Seungkwan, having only returned from the pantry. “Why didn’t you tell me you’ve arrived!”

“And make the pregnant woman come and get me?” you ask her pointedly, though there’s a giddy smile on your face. You’re probably more excited about working with your cousin (even only for a month) than you let on. “I don’t want my niece to come early.”

Jennie laughs, her hand waves at you so you’ll come closer. “Who says I’ll come and get you? And who says my baby’s a niece? I will just ask Seungkwan to go down for me.”

You look at Jennie’s desk, almost twice longer than the desk you used to have in your old office. It’s neat and there’s a computer for her to use; everything’s in place like you expected Kim Jennie’s space to be. Seungkwan’s desk isn’t that far off hers, it's a little messy but not all over the place. You figure the only reason it looks messy is because you’ve just seen Jennie’s.

“You’ll sit with me for the time being, help me with things as you learn how it goes around here,” she explains, telling you to put your bag on the chair next to hers. “I’ll let you handle some stuffs too, just to remind you you’re not here as my assistant.”

You chuckle a little at that but nod nevertheless. “Is the CEO still not in?”

“Nope,” she shakes her head as she pulls up some documents you need to read first. “He comes late every Monday and Wednesday; usually sometime after 9. You’ve got to call him once it’s 9.30 and he’s still not in the office unless he doesn’t have meetings and urgent documents, okay?”

Taking out a small notebook from your bag, you write down important stuffs you’d need to remember while Jennie continues to tell you everything you need to know first before anything else.

“Do I need to make coffees every morning or something?”

“Only when he asks for it. He usually has drinks ready by himself when he comes in though.”

You’re about to ask about other stuffs when Seungkwan stands in front of your desk, announcing that you should introduce yourself to the people in the department and he’d come with you for that.

Jennie nods encouragingly at you as you reluctantly stand up. It’s a must, yet you’re always nervous when meeting new people. Plus, you know sooner or later there’s going to be talks going around because you got in through Jennie.

You shake the thoughts away, there’s no need to think about worst case scenarios when it’s literally your first day and you might not even need to talk to some of them at all.

Seungkwan brings you around the floor, introducing you to everyone and you're thankful most of them seems nice enough at first glance. Some of them though, you can tell already, are going to be problems, but you wish the CEO is always busy so you’d have no business dealing with these people unless you really need to.

After he’s done, you thank Seungkwan for accompanying you before you excuse yourself to the restroom. Seungkwan just nods as he jokingly tells you not to get lost.

Truthfully, you don’t really need to go to the restroom, but your heart always beats too fast after meeting a group of new people, and it doesn’t help that you’ve somewhat become the center of their attentions because you’re the new girl.

You exhale another breath, going out of the stall when you think you’ve calmed down enough and wash your hands just for the sake of it.

When you return to your desk, Jennie stands up instead.

“Mr. Kim is in, let’s go to his office,” she says, her professional tone never wavering.

You nod, fixing the nonexistent wrinkle on your blouse. Jennie looks at you encouragingly as she knocks on the door. Her hand reaches out to squeeze yours, the least comfort she can give you because she knows you’re always nervous in new environment, before opening the door to the office without waiting for her boss’s reply.

“Sir?” Jennie calls to the tall figure in the room, busy rummaging through his shelf first thing in the morning.

Your eyes immediately go to Mr. Kim. He’s obviously taller than average, you easily register. Even from behind, you can tell this is a man who carries himself well, an aura of authority hugs him even though it’s not one that scares you. This man hasn’t even done anything and you already know he’s one to be respected.

You wonder what is it about him that feels familiar to you.

Your eyes wander to his broad back, cheeks abruptly heating as it clicks why; he reminds you of that Mingyu guy. It’s probably his wide shoulders and seemingly muscled but lean body, along with the black hair even though it’s styled neatly in contrast to the man whose hair was tousled from sleep and, well, probably your doing the night before.

You shake your head at the memory, making Jennie look at you in concern. This is definitely not the time to think about that guy.

Mr. Kim hasn’t turned around, simply hums as he flips through a file.

“Sir, here’s the substitute secretary I told you about,” she tells him, and you’re about to introduce yourself and bow to him when Mr. Kim turns around and shows his face, freezing you in place.

Fuck.

How on earth did you forget Jennie’s boss is named Kim Mingyu?

©wonwoonlight – all rights reserved.

taglist: @yslshua @penny-quinn @nollixtrml

#mingyu scenarios #mingyu fluff #seventeen scenarios #seventeen fluff #seventeen au #mingyu fic #mingyu imagines #mingyu x reader #seventeen x reader #svt fluff #svt fic #seventeen fic #seventeen imagines #seventeen scenario #seventeen imagine #seventeen fanfic #mingyu scenario #mingyu angst #seventeen angst #my daisy masterlist

[dyeyourhandsblue]

I’ve been meaning to post my prediction about how the next episodes of Not Me will go since last sunday but as usual I just kept procrastinating, and now after the ig live with P’Nuchy I’m like “gdi I should‘ve posted it earlier because now people won’t believe I really was thinking this even before the live!” lmao but when she said “ep6 will end on a cliffhanger but ep7 is where the sweetness begins” that was EXACTLY what I was thinking also! our minds???

but anyway, here’s my prediction:

episode 6

gram and sean are the ones behind white’s “kidnapping”, but white finds a way to not reveal the truth to them (gumpa helps?)

sean then tells everyone his plan, white proceeds to tell the plan to tod (tod trying to get info from white last ep was a too pointed of a scene imo to not be foreshadowing)

so when they get to tawin’s building, there are cops there already

sean at some point is captured/in danger? and white comes back to save him (possibly that scene of the teaser where gawin is beating up white is about this, his character probably got altered from the teaser to now)

that’s the turning point of seanwhite’s relationship

episode 7

they find a way to escape (that scene where white is helping sean/half-carrying him is from here)

the scenes of seanwhite in black’s room are from this episode

we probrably get the first kiss here?

then I thought ep8 would be mostly fluff and then at the end we’d get a cliffhanger where we’re shown black waking up... but now that P’Nuchy said the love scenes were divided between eps 8 and 9, I guess Black is coming back on the end of ep 9 instead.

now for my questions! i have no idea how the show will proceed re: white’s reveal and tod’s... everything.

about white’s reveal, there are three possibilites: sean finds out the truth before anything really happens between them; sean finds out the truth after they kiss but before anything more serious happens; sean finds out the truth after they’ve slept together/are dating.

I LOVE the theory that the seanwhite scenes in black’s room are actually them both trying to play each other and the scene on the bed (where white is tied up... ayyy) is where sean tells him he knows he’s not black. BUT if that happened we wouldn’t have any drama about sean feeling betrayed etc and I somehow feel that... P’Nuchy wants the drama? the fact that seans knows the truth from the beginning in the novel and P’Nuchy changed that in the show makes me think she wants the reveal drama.... so I was betting on sean finding out after they kiss but before anything more serious happens, because I feel like the last option would just be a BIG betrayal for sean and I don’t want him to suffer that much lmao. but P’Nuchie saying she divided the love scenes in two eps.... somehow... makes me suspicious..... that we’re really getting the last option...... sean will really go through the ringer :( I can’t believe we’re really getting off’s character suffering more for the first time.

about tod, I fee like he’s suspicious but he’s SO obviously suspicious that this can’t NOT bet a red herring??? it’s just TOO obvious that he’s a bad guy. there must be another plot twist coming. I do think he’s a bad guy based on how he treats white (more on that coming in another post), but i don’t think things will be as straightforward as "Tawi and Tod are working together”. my theory was that Tod is actually Tawi’s rival (because they both sell drugs lol), but if my theory that he’ll bring the cops in ep6 ends up being real... why would he help Tawi if he’s a rival, right? so maybe he’s working for Tawi instead? but that’s 1) too easy 2) with the way Tod’s character has been developed until now, do you guys really think he’d be ok with being someone’s subordinate? so now my theory number 2 is that his dad was Tawi’s subordinate and he inherited his position just like he inherited his dad’s building, but he secretly wants to take over Tawi’s business, so he’s actually double-crossing both white/the gang AND tawi.

there are so many ways in which the plot could go and they all make sense based on what we’ve seen so far and it’s driving me insane in the best way possible lmao i want to know in what direction P’Nuchy will go!!!! also the bts scenes from the last few days where everyone seems to be in a protest and people are holding the lgbt flag has me SO HYPED are we going there?????? will Not Me also criticize lgbtphobia?????? I JUST WANT ALL THE EPISODES ALREADY.

#not me #not me the series #this post is a MESS and ALL OVER THE PLACE but that's just a representation of my mind rn #running in five diff directions at the same time but they're all about not me #someone talk to me abt this show plsplspls #tv #not me spoilers

[charmixpower]

For me recently I’ve been eating up all the rivusa crumbs in the movies ESP magical adventure but since I have no irl outlet I’m just gonna say here that in secret of the lost kingdom the freaking cut scene from the Italian where the old white man tells riven that he needs to figure out whats his reason fighting and Musa just comes and links arms with him owns my heart AND THEN it links back to when they have their moment towards the end where he tells her she is what he’s fighting for😭😭 dude that kiss is engraved in my head for absolutely no reason I love it so much the animation was giving all it could have been giving at that moment😭😭 and also when Musa was giggling while riven was doing extra stuff with his hover bike just makes me so happy🥲

But then magical adventure ironically outsells the sotlk rivusa moments Bcs let me say when they meet in eraklyon and she runs and pushes up on his shoulders to kiss the side of his forehead😭😭 and his hand placement just gives me life and when they kiss (with so much tenderness that my heart is exploding) his hands deadass brushes over her ass😀😀😀 (the fact that the animators made an ACTIVE DECISION TO ANIMATE THAT TOO) it just helps with my hc that musas favourite place to hold riven is around his neck and his is around her waist (and lower ig🤷‍♀️ ) and they’re holding hands to wan to the ship too🥲🥲🥲 ALSO when riven ran up to musa on the ship to tell her “I always loved playing pirates” I MEAN COME ON THEY ARE SO CUTE and when they’re all kinda mourning over sky’s dad riven just puts his hands on her shoulders to comfort her and she later just reaches back to place her palm over his hand on her shoulder😭😭😭 URGH my heart can’t handle all these moments and then when the winx get back their powers she tackles him from the back and wraps her arms around his neck while she’s flying😭 and they just stay that way and look at each other when bloom and sky kiss lol🤪 and then when they need to fly back to the ship THEYRE THE LAST COUPLE TO SEPARATE AND HE JUST HOLDS HER HAND FOR AS MUCH AS HE CAN BEFORE SHE FLIES OFF😭😭😭 ok I think I’m done with my rivusa verbal diarrhoea I spent a whole 3 hours watching magical kingdom because I kept going back and slowing down the cute rivusa crumbs and analysing everything🤪 thank you for coming to my Ted talk about why rivusa have always been and will be the best

HELPPP THIS ASK IS EVERYTHING AND MORE!!!!

I thought I was the only one obsessed with movie Rivusa, bestie I love you, I could talk about "I've always loved playing pirates" for hours straight

YOUR SO RIGHT

SotLK is about big dramatic Rivusa while MA is all about those domestic casual Rivusa moments and I could stare at them forever

I rewatch the first and second movie p often because I love and are obsessed without them thank uuu so I am absolutely the person to send this to thank u for the food

I'm so mad they cut that scene bc Riven's arc in the first movie makes so much less sense without it but it's literally the same arc again and I'm sick of is, MA forever for just letting Rivusa vibe and exist

Like I know Riven is the most interesting and well written male character in the show but give my man a break 🙄🙄🙄 his shoulders must be in so much pain form carrying most of the specialist sub plots

I love all the Rivusa kisses from the first kingdom, but the one where she was surprising him was so cute. Riven defo stuggles with being openly affectionate even tho he really really wants to be and Musa knows this show she's being affectionate enough for the both of them I love them so much sobbing

Their so soft but I can't believe you needed the movie to tell u that Riven is handsy with his s/o /j like it was so obvious. I couldn't tell you who is worse between them tbh. Musa, as seen by her s1 outfit, is more attention getting, Riven is only subtle when you compare him to her. Musa is going to kill Riven with her outfits one day, and she's not gonna even be a little sorry because it was completely intentional

The animators knoooo

My hc is that Musa really likes just attaching herself to his arm. His arm is stuck being cuddled to her chest and he's not getting it back thank youuu. That hc is because the s2 finale party is literally everything I've ever needed in Winx, but I can definitely see where your coming from. Musa is part of the "I'm going to jump on my boyfriend" coalition with Stella and Aisha

And yes true, canon

THEIR LITERALLY SO CUTE ADORABLE AND SOFT IN THAT MOVIE AND I LOVE THEM SO MUCH FOR IT

I love how Musa prefers to sneak attack Riven by jumping on his back. Stella and Aisha r so proud. She definitely does that just to mess with him. "Hahaha I snuck up on you 😜" and Riven, who damn well heard her is like "yaah you did babe" and then she messes with his pointy hair

They are BOTH CLINGY BECAUSE THEY WORRY ALOT ABOUT EACH OTHER CHANGE MY MIND I LOVE THEM SO DEARLY

YE S YES UES IVE DONE RHE SAME THING YOUR THE MOST VAILD PERSON IN THE WORLD

I completely agree and I am patiently waiting for the next ted talk this was WONDERFUL

#winx club #rus chatters #rivusa #asks #long post

[khaleesiofalicante]

OK I GOT 5 HOURS OF SLEEP LAST NIGHT WHICH IS PRETTY OK IG (I did stay up to read the fic-) BOTH MY TESTS WENT LIKE SHIT, I HAD AN ANXIETY ATTACK IN PROGRAMMING CLASS BECAUSE BY TEACHER IS A LITTLE SHIT WHO KEPT ON YELLING AT ME WHEN I DIDN'T UNDERSTAND SOMETHING AND I SPENT LUNCH ALONE BUT AT LEAST NOW IM ALONE WITH MY LAPTOP SO YAYAYAYYA

first of all, this chapter right here is my comfort chapter from now on. i said what i said. I will be rereading it again and again just because i can. it was PERFECTION

here's me going crazy at 2 am yesterday.

MAGNUS' CHAPTER

LET'S GO LET'S GO LET'S GO

AHHHHHHH IT'S THEIR ANNIVERSARY

SCREAM

oh

alec shaved his beard because it made him look older

RAFAEL WAS SO UPSET AFTER THE MEXICO ATTACK BECAUSE OF ANJALI RIGHT??

magnus and alec are the oblivious parents istg

“Are you decent?” Max yelled. “I don’t want to be traumatized again.”

“Hey! We agreed not to talk about that!” Alec yelled back.

Im not even surprised at this point

“Happy anniversary, bapa!” Rafael kissed him on the cheek and handed him the flowers.

“Where are my flowers?” Alec asked.

Rafael plucked a rose from the bouquet and threw it at Alec. “Here you go.”

“Thanks, son,” Alec mumbled.

IM WHEEZING

DAVID BAKES

“David made it,” Max said shyly. "

Oh,” Alec replied and then shrugged. “Well, the icing could be a little sweeter I think.”

Ever since Max started dating, Alec had become incredibly protective. Alec liked David of course – it was impossible to find someone who didn’t. But that didn’t mean Alec approved.

And it didn’t help that the blond boy was absolutely terrified of Alec.

ALEC STOP TEASING HIM

THE BOY IS ALREADY SCARED

“I don’t know,” Alec analysed the card. “David used too much glitter.”

“Since when do you have a problem with excessive glitter?” Max demanded.

ALEC

“I didn’t use him!” Max huffed. “He was thoroughly compensated for his efforts!”

“Compensated how?” Alec asked.

“Uh,” Max said. “With donuts.”

when i saw donuts i immediately thought of rose and luisa from jtv

iykyk

but should i continue the show? i got tired of jane continuously embarrasing herself

“You expect us to follow rules?” Alec asked in surprise. “In our own home? On our anniversary?”

The warlock boy grinned wickedly before leaning close to Alec.

“You better do it, or I will tell everyone about your secret,” Max whispered.

Alec blinked at that.

the secret...

I DONT LIKE HOW MANY THINGS POPPED INTO MY HEAD

is highschool musical that bad? i havent watched it. should i?

what if i cried

i just wanna hug alec??? but i cant say it'll be ok because it wont

“Is that why you are not attending?” Magnus grinned at his friend. “Or is it because you are terrified of Georgia?”

“That child is the reincarnation of Christopher Lightwood!” Ragnor complained. “I heard she made explosives out of demon ichor! Who makes explosions out of demon ichor?”

RAGNOR IS PROBABLY GETTING FLASHBACKS

THESE STUPID FUCKING BITCHES

how tf do you think we have survived huh??

medicine that's how

vaccines, anti biotics and what not

stop being close-minded and fucking do it

ok i know the risk is great

BUT OTHERWISE THEY ALL DIE

it was different for warlocks. The Shadow World was their universe. The nephilim kept it safe. At one point in their lives, they had learned to coexist with them, out of necessity and out of obligation.

And now here they were – working together in the name of friendship and love.

how things change...

what

say what

the causes are what

ok let's not jump to conclusions

im fucking crying wtf

alec doesnt deserve this shit

all he's done is make the world a better place

hes worked so hard on this

RAZIEL CAN GO FUCK HIMSELF

what am i supposed to say to my parents if one of them comes to check on me and im sitting here crying at 2 am

He didn’t want to believe in a reality that would punish Alec. Alec who only wanted to do what is good and right.

Alec was who was losing his hope and strength every passing day. Alec who was struggling. Alec who was turning to desperate measures to cope with all the stress.

please alec

no please

THE ANGELS ARE BITCHES

Because if Magnus found out Raziel was the one causing all this pain for Alec, he would march up to heaven and set the bastard on fire himself.

AND I'LL GO WITH HIM

KNEW THE SPY WAS LIVVY

AWW RAGNOR LIKES SELENA THATS SO SWEET

blue and gold

STOP IT IM CRYING AGAIN

The shadowhunter was a good influence on him. Magnus hoped Alec would see it sooner rather than later.

HUH

HUHU

HUH

omg

GIGI GETTING A SIBLING

“Max isn’t allowed to do a lot of things,” Magnus chuckled. “But he does them anyway.”

thats my boi

GASP

]THE NECKLACE

rafael is growing into the consul voice

they grow up so fast

nope nope he's still the little 5 year old

voice cracking what do you mean he's 20

im glad hes happy with mila. or is he...?

Magnus had deduced as much. Alec lived in his beautifully oblivious world. But Magnus noticed.

He noticed the hickeys. He noticed the late-night visits. He noticed the tense phone calls.

well thank god there's at least one non-oblivious person (alec i love you so much but you are very very oblivious)

“What’s stopping you then?” Magnus asked.

"2554 miles,” Rafael chuckled sadly.

me with all my online friends

probably more miles

Magnus tried to do the math but promptly gave up.

me

But Alec did lie though. Magnus pushed the thought away.

NOT NOW

LET ME LIVE IN PEACEFUL OBLIVION

HUSH

“Except melt it?” Rafael chuckled.

“Yes,” Magnus chuckled back. “As you can see, the bar is extremely low in the Lightwood family.”

AHHIUCCDSKUHDCV

i have no clue what the words describing the outfit are

time to google

OK PRETTY

Fifteen years. Fifteen years of loving and Alec still made his heart stutter.

dont do this to me right now I WILL CRY

“What the hell?” Max exclaimed. “Why are you all dressed up?”

“In case you haven’t noticed, it’s my anniversary,” Alec chuckled.

Max-

Fifteen years. Fifteen years and Magnus still took Alec’s breath away.

HJCSDHJBJDHSGCDYGJVVC JHVDFYMJ

it's not funny MY EYES ARE WATERING

“Bapak is a good looking one in the family,” Rafael pointed out. “You are the chaotic one and I am the smart one.”

“What am I then?” Alec asked dryly. “A sack of potatoes?”

“You’re the sexy one,” Magnus grinned. “A sexy sack of potatoes.”

yes.

Alec grinned back and leaned forward. Magnus put his hands around Alec’s neck and kissed him. He kissed Alec with all the love he had inside his heart.

Just like the first time. Just like the hundredth time. Just like the thousandth time.

Because with Alec, every kiss mattered. Every single one.

muffled sob

“Stop making out, oh my god!” Max groaned.

Magnus sensed a pillow coming their way but Rafael caught it before it hit them.

“Max, stop!” Rafael scolded. “You will wrinkle dad’s suit and ruin bapak’s hair! I spent hours ironing both!”

why is max me when i see people display affection in front of me

ALSO RAFAEL HKUIUIDCSKIHUDFVHJDFVHU

“They are here,” Rafael said. “You two better look exactly the way you did when I left with Max or I will raise hell.”

IM SCREAMING

Selena was wearing a blue crop top with the words “MIND YOUR OWN UTEREUS” written in gold.

i need that top

DAVID'S SHIRT IS THE COLOR OF MAX'S MAGIC

AHH ISABELLE DOESNT KNOW SHE'S PREGNANT YET

The argument of “who gave the best gift” had started when Jace and Izzy had gotten drunk on vodka. It didn’t help that Alec had gotten drunk as well. All three Lightwood siblings had then proceeded to have an argument about who had the best spouse. The whole night had been drunken chaos. Magnus, Clary and Simon had let them have it since the Lightwood siblings had a tendency to carry the world on their shoulders even when nobody asked them. They rarely ever let loose ever since their worlds had plunged into sickness and demon attacks. Especially Alec. So, Magnus had let his husband be that 18-year-old boy again. The boy who got drunk and fought with his siblings and sang songs about Magnus’ pretty eyes.

OH MY GOD THE CHAOS

Georgia considered that. “I’m not allowed to melt it, right?”

“No,” they all replied in chorus.

LET GIGI MELT IT

SELENA IM SO PROUD OF YOU

“Dad,” Max said. “Can you keep a picture of me wearing this necklace in your office?”

“Why?” Rafael asked.

“I think it will piss off the boomers,” Max giggled.

“Nice!” Lexi grinned. “A downworlder wearing a shadowhunter heirloom? They will lose their heads. Uncle Alec, you must do it.”

“I will do you one better. I will hang a tapestry,” Alec chuckled.

YASSS I CANT WAIT FOR THE SHADOWHUNTERS TO BE PISSED

AWW THEY DIDNT KNOW THE NECKLACE USED TO BELONG TO MAGNUS

he actually gave to camille first-

Why couldn’t this boy just cause chaos during his travel year like the rest of them? Why did he actually study and do his research as recommended?

why would you NOT study and research during your travel year????

oh shit

well well well

david bby stfu

i love you but pls stop speaking for all our sakes

“Holy shit,” Max said. “It is expensive then!”

“Don’t pawn the ruby!” Rafael warned.

MAX NO-

OH THE STONE COMES FROM EDOM

oh no

pls dont fight

oh so i was wrong about magus confronting him from that snippet

all you need to know is im sobbing right now and grammarly is the only thing making this coherent

dont mind me just

NO I FORGOT ABOUT MAX AND DAVID

GET BACK IN THE ROOM YOU IDIOTS

don't do this to me at 3 am

OK THE DILF PART

thank you for adding light into my life again

(me while editing this: today really isn't my day huh? i just slipped in rainwater outside my balcony because I heard rain and ran there. now my knee and back hurt and I think I sprained (?) my toe-

ANYWAY

wait im gonna go check out the rain and then continue editing this

ok i got bored of the rain)

that made me laugh through my tears

“Objectively good looking?” Jace snorted. “Excuse you, but my parabatai is smoking hot! He is a freaking prize, okay? If we had a magazine for hot shadowhunters, you would be on the cover page. Every single issue.”

“Okay, that’s enough!” Alec interrupted. “Magnus, are you happy? Now all my friends have told me I am pretty.”

“I said smoking hot,” Jace corrected.

“We are not being biased,” Clary pointed out. “It is the general consensus, Alec.”

“It’s true,” Lexi said. “So many people have asked me for your number, Uncle Alec. And I would have given it to them if I wasn’t worried about being turned into a marshmallow.”

LEXI DUHDUGHUDFCUHKVDFUIKFDU

“Dad, I don’t know why you are so worried,” Max said in a bored tone. “You’re a told DILF.”

David choked on his champagne and Jace patted him on the back.

“What the hell is a DILF?” Alec demanded.

“Oh, I know this one!” Jace said excitedly. “It means Dashing and Irresistible Looking Father. Max is right, you are a total DILF.”

“Mr. Herondale-” David raised a hand.

“I heard one of the shadowhunters in their travel year calling me a DILF too,” Jace said proudly.

THAT IS NOT WHAT DILF MEANS OH MY GOD

“It’s not a rumour,” Selena spoke up and passed her phone. “There is a group chat at Scholomance just to thirst after you.”

add me to it

ALL THE COMMENTS I CANT BREATHE

“Alec Lightwood can run me over with a Maserati and I would thank him.”

“Give me that,” Izzy grabbed the phone and started giggling. “Petition for Consul Alec Lightwood-Bane to stab me with his mortal sword.”

“Isabelle!” Alec hissed, cheeks flaming. “Stop it!”

“I want one!” Jace grabbed the phone now. “By the Angel!”

“Read it!” the kids yelled in chorus.

“I would gladly let Consul Lightwood-Bane inspect my mortal instruments,” Jace chuckled and threw the phone at David.

David shook his head vehemently and threw it at Max.

“My body is just a hole for Alec Lightwood,” Max read out loud and started laughing so hard that he fell off his chair.

Lexi grabbed the phone and giggled. “I want the Consul to strip off my runes among other things.”

She passed the phone to Gigi, who looked at the phone and look at Alec.

“Uncle Alec,” the girl said. “This person wants you to crush them with your massive archer arms.”

“Give me that,” Rafael grabbed it now. “Aw, this one is a classic, dad. Alec Lightwood turned me gay.”

He threw the phone at Simon, who stared the screen and looked up. “Uh, I don’t think I can read this one out loud in front of the kids.

“Is this the one about the basement?” Selena chuckled and Simon nodded.

WHAT'S THE BASEMENT ONe

TELL ME

AWW GIGI AND LEXI PUTTING MAKEUP ON DAVID AND MAX RECORDING IT

google translator time

oooo Rafael's gonna talk with Mila

Magnus you're such a good father

seriously

“Sometimes things are just sad. So, you need to let yourself be sad.”

YES

SAY IT LOUDER

THEY ARE UNDER THE BED

AHHH MAX AND DAVID

DAVID CALLED HIM MY ANGEL IN FRENCH

Alec and Magnus hiding under the bed and spying on them is just-

Jace had tried to give Max the shovel talk and had gotten a little too emotional.

of course, he did smh I love him so much

“David doesn’t need a shovel talk,” Alec smiled. “He knows what would happen to him if he hurts my son.”

David gulped. “You will throw me into the silent city?”

“I will ask me husband to portal you to hell,” Alec said – Consul Voice. “We have relatives there.”

the beloved relatives yes

“Goodnight,” Jace gave them a salute. “Have fun inspecting Magnus’ mortal instruments.”

JACE

OH SO THE QUESTION WAS ABOUT SMOKING

damn it

oh my god guys he said he'll stop smoking

just lemme have this moment

my boy's lungs will be intact

HIS LUNGS WILL BE OK

“I can’t wait to see all the messages on the chat after that,” Magnus giggled.

Alec looked up. “I’m more than a tall glass of water, Magnus!”

SCREAMING

In his dream, he saw them again. But they weren’t smiling this time.

what

wait

THE PROPHETIC DREAMS

nope nope nope

Nah I don't know what you're talking about

haha

damn, I think I really hurt my back...

OK BUT THE IMMORTALITY ANGST???? WAS SO SO GOOD???? I know it makes me cry but is it bad that I'm always so excited for angst written by you because of HOW GOOD it is????

"When I die I will love you from my grave" I NEED THIS ON MY FOREHEAD OH MY GOD I LOVE THESE TWO SO SO MUCH

alright I need to get something for my back and my knee (I'm home alone so this will be fun)

OK, I THINK THE NEXT CHP WILL BE ANJALI'S POV I JUST FEEL IT!!! I miss my girl so much I hope she's doing ok. Jaime too...

I'm rereading all of these chapters after chapter 10 because why not. Bye!!

OKAY I AM GLAD YOU LIKED IT BUT I AM ALSO DEEPLY WORRIED ABOUT YOUR HEALTH.

I hope your knee and back feels better soon!

also fuck that teacher yelling something doesn't make people understand it any better ugh dumb piece of shit anyway screw that person.

I hope you get some good rest and recovery from this rollercoaster of a day.

Take care!

#lbaf

[eyesaremosaics]

TRIGGER WARNING:

The past few days, I have been shocked, saddened and disgusted with an artist who I have admired since I was a child. I remember seeing the sweet dreams video when it came on MTV in 1995 when I was 6 years old. I remember being frightened, but mesmerized by him. I pretended to hate him whenever he would come on TV, and my dad would tease me: “oh, there you go it’s your boyfriend Megan.” I would shriek in disgust and say “no!” Secretly I would watch his music videos when no one else was home, there was a hypnotic quality to his voice...something that drew me in. I know many females my age can relate. I bought his albums in secret, and until I was 15 years old I had this very real fear that if my family found out I listened to Marilyn Manson—they would stop loving me. Which seems silly and absurd, I often laugh about that.

However, once high school hit, he became more gimmick and less rock and roll. More self aggrandizing and less of a nihilistic commentator on society. He was once a major influence to me, my style of art, expression and creativity. The women he dated became icon’s to me, something to be emulated. I became a vintage girl because of my interest in Dita Von Teese at age 14. I wore high heels to school, seamed stockings with a garter belt, dressed like a 1950s housewife. I was voted best dressed in my high school senior year (2006).

I never had a crush on him or anything, it wasn’t really like that, it was more like he was a person I looked up to. After his interview in bowling for Columbine, all his interviews, his book, tv appearances etc. he came across as a highly intelligent and creative person who challenged social norms and societal constructs. I appreciated his androgyny, and admired his fearlessness. I listened to his music a great deal in high school, and it got me through some very dark and angsty times.

As the years went on, it became apparent he was losing his edge. I loved Rose McGowan, she was one of the women I modeled myself after as a young person (next to Winona Ryder of course), and she always spoke highly of him, saying he was a good boyfriend, but the drugs were something she couldn’t hang with. When he was with Dita, I fell in love with her too, and found her to be just as cool and interesting.

When he cheated on Dita with Evan Rachel Wood I was devastated. I felt like my idol fell. The stand-up man I thought he was—wasn’t real, and I am ashamed to say I blamed Evan, vilifying her as some “scarlet woman” who destroyed what was (to me) the perfect marriage. Little did I know that this poor girl was suffering. In ways many of us can relate to, and many we can’t begin to understand.

A few girls that I follow on IG have come forward with graphic accounts of the abuse to which they were subjected by Brian Warner (aka Marilyn Manson), and it made me sick to my stomach. I mean... I wrote him off as a has been in 2007, but I still thought he was an ok person, I still respected him for the art he made that inspired me as a kid. Now I feel like a huge chunk of my childhood was a lie. All the things I thought he stood for were merely conjecture.

All this background was necessary to get to what I really wanted to say: this whole ordeal was very triggering for me as a survivor of narcissistic/sociopathic, sexual, emotional and physical abuse. I stand with these girls, because though I can only begin to imagine some of the things they have described in their testimony... other things I know all too well. In fact many of the situations these poor girls were violently subjected to, have happened to me as well. It actually broke me down in tears to read.

My heart goes out to the survivors, you are strong and beautiful. It takes YEARS to survive this type of abuse. I know because I am living proof. I have been in more than one relationship like this, which led me to have zero self esteem, resort to substance abuse, risky self-destructive behavior, attempted suicide etc. I have been in extensive therapy for these traumas for over five years now, and only in the last two, was I able to get a full sense of self back.

There is so much to say on this issue. I am proud of the girls who came forward, it takes an insane amount of bravery to call out your abuser publicly... I still haven’t had the courage to call out mine. However it gives me strength to know there is a movement of women empowering each other to break their silence and speak their truth.

I am disillusioned and sad about this person I used to think highly of, but it’s the same feeling you go through when leaving a narcissistic/sociopathic relationship. In my own situation... I left feeling like Marion Cotillard’s character in “inception”. The top forever spinning...Not knowing when I would wake up into the real world....Not knowing which was the real world, and which was a dream. Wanting to die, so you can finally wake up.

There are stages of grief that you go through, accepting that this person never cared about you, and saw you only as narcissistic supply, or as “food” for their ego. They see matters only as a means for power and control. They don’t feel things the way you or I do. It is in this that you should pull power from. You are not the one who is weak, it is they who are weak. They who lack the emotional depth or compassion to function as a normal human being. They will never know love, or real friendship—and you should feel sorry for them. What a terribly lonely and meaningless existence that must be. To be a parasite.

You ( the survivor) still have a chance for life, YOU will love again. It may feel like you will never reach the other side of it, through the panic attacks, the sleepless nights, the terrorizing anxiety, the bouts of crying, the humiliation, the silence, the nightmares—but you will. I learned a long time to let things build and not destroy me. To any of you reading this who may be able to relate: you can do it too.

I never thought I would survive my demons, I have a history of abuse that goes back to my childhood, which is why I am so protective of children now. It’s almost like I have made it my personal mission to assure that no child will ever be hurt the way I was, not on my watch.

Keeping your inner child alive is so crucial to survive the darkness of this world. We have to be the architect of our own reality, and rebuild a new world, a safe one to live in. One where a man can treat us with love and kindness. That doesn’t mean we should forget. We forgive the abusers not because they deserve forgiveness, but because we deserve peace.

I stand with all women out there living with this kind of abuse. Living with domestic violence. You are not alone. I hear you, I see you. There is a deeper systemic problem going on here enabling this kind of violence, and it Must. Be. Stopped.

#breakthesilence

#me #marilyn manson #break the silence

[the-greatest-story-untold]

I’m rambling abt NCT. Bear with me.

So, NCT 2020 Resonance Global Wave Beyond Live concert (sheesh, that’s long!) ended about 3 hours ago.

I finally got to sit and think through what I had experienced.

I’ve read through twitter, IG and of course, Tumblr.

I know quite a lot of fans are upset that SM went through with the concert when both Taeyong and Jisung are both unable to participate. And when Jisung was actually able to somewhat participate but Taeyong wasn’t, it ruffled some more feathers.

It is of course, very worrying that Taeyong may be injured/unwell enough to be completely uninvolved in the concert. I would have thought they would try to put in at least a clip of him wishing well to his team.

Then it occured to me that either way, fans won’t be happy. There will still be some that’ll bark that SM is not letting him rest or whatever.

In the end, yes, it would have been better if they could have postponed the concert till next year or whenever. But seriously, there is no promise that no one out of the 23 members will always be completely ok.

They’re a ridiculously large group with multiple members playing dual/multiple roles half the time. One of those members are bound to get tired or injured. I don’t want it to happen but hey, life is horrible and things happen.

(If you can’t already tell, I’m very much a pessimist. I don’t really look at the bright side of things. So excuse my morbid acceptance that people will get sick/ill/injured.) 

I mean, at the rate that SM is pushing some of these members, it is not very subtle that the distribution of responsibilities are not even. We definitely see some faces more than others.

if you want to argue that Taeyong is the leader of the group, the backbone, the pillar, the very essence of NCT... I won’t stop you. I feel that way too. But seriously, the leader missing out on one online concert won’t render the team useless.

Taeyong is a great leader. I acknowledge it. And one major thing he has done well as a leader is to ensure the team carries on without their leader. 

Watching the concert, I see how the different members who are often labelled the ‘mum’, ‘dad’, or ‘big brother’ of the team step up and lead the group. 

Taeyong is NCT’s leader but I will argue he is not NCT’s only leader. We have Taeil and Johnny, both of whom stepped up to look over the members (regardless if it was a forced situation or not). We have Kun, himself the leader of WayV. We have Doyoung (and let’s throw in Jeno), who were in a way the co-captains of their units. We have Mark, lovely Mark, who was the unofficial Dream Leader but made official through Dreamies’ and NCTzens’ sheer will. Even Renjun and Haechan stepped up during the ‘Surprise Live’ to lead the youngsters.

So yeah, it was sad that Taeyong wasn’t in the concert. My heart ached when I didn’t see him performing his parts. But at the same time, I HAVE to admit, I felt so proud that his teammates were able to fill his parts so well. 

And before anyone accuse me of saying Taeyong is replaceable, I must enforce that I DON’T. Taeyong is Taeyong, he brings his own charms and charisma to every song he performs. And that was made very obvious in the concert when it felt so blatantly ‘in-your-face’ that he was missing.

BUT. I will not diminish the effort put in by the other members who had to cover his parts. Kudos to them for taking the baton, it must have weighed heavy. I am sure that they are aware of the expectations EVERYONE has for Taeyong. So KUDOS to them for being able to carry that baton and YET, put in their own flair to it.

Apparently, Jeno was required to learn the first bit of ‘Make a Wish’ within an hour in the waiting room. Why? For the love of all things good, we know SM will never explain. But the fact that he did, and he did it WELL (he slayed it of course), KUDOS to him.

Sungchan covered Taeyong’s part in ‘BOSS’. It wasn’t Taeyong’s flair but Sungchan pulled it off with his own style, and just as fine.

Shotaro covered Taeyong’s part in ‘7th Sense’. You can clearly see he was a professional performer even before being part of NCT. He definitely threw in his own flair into that performance.

Yangyang covered Taeyong’s part in ‘Lightbulb’, and boy, he delivered. I watched that performance and I realised how much talent that young man has. It is disappointing he was not given a lot of parts (regardless if it was as WayV or NCT).

Jaehyun covered Taeyong’s part in ‘Kick It’, and of course he did great. We’ve already seen him cover for TY before. Yuta in turn covered Taeyong’s dance break in ‘Kick It’. Similarly, he shined.

Ten carried ‘Baby Don’t Stop’ all by himself! It must have been exhausting, he was performing consecutively from one song to another! He’s another one we must applaud for! 

Overall, I feel very grateful towards NCT for being able to put up this concert. Performing in front of a live crowd would have been better but personally, I felt this online stage allowed them to perform/act a little more freely. It felt like a home stage that you put on only for those special to you... a little bit more personal compared to a real-live concert but definitely just as high quality.

I enjoyed the concert, I smiled so much through it. I am going to miss OT23, even more than I missed OT18. When NCT was just 18, I was just getting to know them. Now, they’re a full fledged 23 and counting.

Sungchan and Shotaro fit so well in the group, I forget that they were recent additions. WayV was so very much embraced by the OG NCT members that I forget the unit is only 1 year old (going to 2 soon!)

I love how NCT feels like a family. I am sure every fandom feels the same way about their own artists, but I’ve always felt NCT was different and special because their brand makes them a family of different units. I’ve grown up in a large extended family, and I feel that NCT is just like that. They are friends and yet family, colleagues and yet brothers. 

I saw many wishes from NCTzens for the boys. I saw fans putting up placards saying NCT saved 2020. I’ve read many comments thanking NCT for uplifting them and making them feel present and here. I feel so proud that the boys are able to do that.

I may be just one more fan for NCT and I am sure they’re thankful either way. But I really want them to know how thankful I am for them too. They’ve had an extremely busy year, so I hope they get to rest. Not just some rest, but a full complete holistic break that lets their battery recharge.

I know their schedules are probably already packed and overflowing, but I want them to know that if any one of them needs a break from the hectic schedule, they should take that break AND NOT FEEL BAD ABOUT IT.

Self-care is essential: 

“Rest and self-care are so important. When you take time to replenish your spirit, it allows you to serve others from the overflow. You cannot serve from an empty vessel.” - Eleanor Brownn

I love this quote and I wish to extend this advice to all 23 members of NCT too. 

I am still looking forward to the projects NCT will put out of course. I’m excited to see the unit (new ones?) Sungchan and Shotaro will be in. I’m excited to see Mark back with Dream (*cough cough* rooftop fight?). I definitely want to know what more WayV has in store. 

I hope they have a great year ahead but still think of themselves too once in a while.

Don’t worry boys, NCTzens will always be with you. We are the grass field that awaits you at the end of a ‘long ass ride’. Through the seasons, to infinity and beyond. We love you!

#nct #neo culture technology #nct2020 #nct2020 resonance #nct127 #nctdream #wayv #nct ot23 #nct taeyong #nct taeil #nct johnny #nct yuta #nct kun #nct doyoung #nct ten #nct jaehyun #nct winwin #nct jungwoo #nct lucas #nct mark #nct xiaojun #nct hendery #nct jeno #nct renjun #nct haechan #nct jaemin #nct yangyang #nct shotaro #nct sungchan #nct chenle