#but my dad keeps making all these comments uhhhhhh

[phoenixyfriend]

When Obi-Wan gets to AotC, there's also about two dozen Anakin clones on-site. They're all girls because... IDK Anakin is trans. They have a hive mind and are developmentally a few years younger than Anakin himself.

It's incredibly unsettling to Obi-Wan.

It's almost definitely a "fuck with Anakin's already fragile mental health" ploy by Palpatine, along with a "what if Jedi Black Widows, for me, a Sith Lord. Wouldn't that be neat? That would be neat."

Anakin is torn between "this freaks me out" and "GANG OF BABY SISTERS LET'S GOOOOOOO."

(I just finished reading Like Real People Do by glimmerglanger, so this is definitely inspired by that and the obligatory 'lay back in bed and daydream variations on plot points of that fic you just really enjoyed,' and also a little by Same Heart, Same Blood by loosingletters.)

They're physically like 14-16 on average, and Anakin's vibrating out of his skin with a million conflicting emotions, but when he tells Padme she's just like "oh, you have a handmaiden gang!"

I told this to @willowcrowned and she suggested:

Once Anakin decides to repress the part of him that’s weirded out and just regard them as baby sisters he gets. A little strange about it The first time one of them dies he may or may not slaughter every person he can [in response to Padme's comment] Anakin starts worrying that he needs to get them cool matching outfits

I also chatted about it with @firebirdeternal and they said:

Gang of Unsettling Smol Siblings is exactly the Karma that Anakin deserves

Do you think the Clones have a kind of Collective Name that they use at first that eventually just kind of morphs into a new last name? Skysisters or something? Like Palpatine was trying to be clever and name them like the Nightsisters.

I initially went with "functionally one person" hive-mind but I'm torn.

I think maybe they're BASICALLY one person on Kamino but drift into Separate Consciousness once they're far enough apart physically that their minds don't blend from proximity anymore.

Then they start Dating (like half of them are dating Fett clones because they grew up with these dudes, it's like childhood friends romance), and Anakin loses his mind about Protecting Them and They're Too Young.

Padme: You're nineteen and we just got married, they can date. Anakin: THEY'RE EIGHT. Padme: And the Fett clones are ten and dying for us in the field. Get them rights before you panic about their love lives.

Firebird:

it could be worse, one of them could imprint on Obi-Wan. "Anakin I promise I won't yell at you for the next five stupid things you do if you can figure out a way to stop this baby from having a crush on me" (I like the idea of Obi-wan bargaining not with "I won't be mad at you ever" because they Both Know That's Not True, and instead haggling with specific allowances. Like he's handing out Stupidity Coupons)

Please imagine Mace and Obi-Wan's personal responses to the idea of suddenly having to deal with not one, not two, but OVER TWENTY SKYWALKERS.

Plo is delighted to take one off their hands.

So is Yoda.

Willow:

Mace is like. okay suicide isn’t the Jedi way but on the other hand. i physically cannot deal with this Yoda: a skywalker, you say? one who is tall enough to reach the top shelf, you say? such a skywalker, bring me

Anakin would be given at least one because fuck you, suffer with us, but he's still a padawan so Ugh, fine, no.

I want to say one stays on Coruscant to hang out with the Guard, and ends up half-adopted by Padme. She keeps dressing up the Aniclone left with her in handmaiden outfits and sending selfies to Anakin.

"Hanging out with the little SiL!"

Anakin has so many issues about WHEN his genetic material was acquired.

And there's some confusion from the Fett clones about how much of a hive mind is normal for Jedi. They are confused that the answer is basically none, and "this is WHY nobody clones a Jedi"

ONE OF THEM STEALS BOBA FROM THE ARENA ON GEONOSIS.

Firebird:

"I have followed in our progenitor's footsteps and acquired a sibling." holds up a struggling Boba "He bites."

Willow:

Ooooo okay so if they have a sort of hive mind then they probably don’t have names other than their designations on Kamino right BUT When they SEPARATE The one that picks Boba up on Geonosis gets a name specifically for that. Okay what if the one Padmé picks up gets some variant on ‘pretty’ because she’s always being dressed up BELLE Maybe Yoda’s Ani has a name that means thief? Because obviously Yoda is using Anakin to steal sweets

So, to make the timeline work...

I don't think anyone would give Anakin one of his sisters until after he's knighted at least.

So obviously when they're doing initial placements none of the sisters go to him or Obi-Wan.

Once he's knighted, of course they're already all placed with someone, and Anakin instead gets Ahsoka. He loves Ahsoka. She is also a little sister. He said so.

At some point afterwards, one of the sisters is left without a place because the Master that was in charge of her died in the field battle.

That sister then gets placed with Obi-Wan, because he's already mostly-successfully raised one Skywalker, so he can do it again.

Anakin gets to hang out with her basically all the time.

Ahsoka is very very jealous of this girl stealing Anakin's attention.

Anakin is oblivious to the rivalry.

He asks Barriss to look after them while he's discussing Adult War Things with Luminara and Obi-Wan, and Barriss gets an eye into This Mess, which is quickly colored by Ahsoka growing a puppy crush on the lovely Miss Offee herself.

Firebird:

Ahsoka: Ah yes, my nemesis. Anisister: Ah yes, my new older sister whom I want to impress so bad.

"I will impress her by being Stoic and Competent" "Oh my god she must think she's so much better than me what a bitch"

Anakin is oblivious to most things to be fair Anakin: Laser focused precision fighting machine who can read the tiniest body movements and predict your moves seconds in advance, who also cannot understand even the most basic social nuance. I was originally writing this as to Dunk on Anakin but then I made myself sad, because none of those things are really his fault.

So you know that post about like, Sasuke and Brooding, specifically in the context of "Brooding" as it's used to refer to Nesting Chickens? Grouchy and protective and sitting on a tennis ball trying to hatch it because they're just. "These are my Babies." Anakin Broods. Baby sisters. Must protecc. "I'm actually fine and extremely deadly in combat." "MUST PROTECT."

Bad Guy: [catches Ahsoka in a Trap] Aniclone: Must rescue sister! Aniclone: [fights, is not winning fight, gets ouched] Ahsoka tearing her way out of Trap: I lived bitch. Also: stay the fuck away from her. [murders so hard]

Ahsoka catches the Protective Older Sib feels by the traditional method: "Hey, only I'm allowed to be mean to them."

Willow:

Oh Anakin has no clue what’s going on. He walks in on Ahsoka glaring at the Ani and is like!!! Little sisters!!! Bonding!!! When Ahsoka was about three seconds away from tossing her out of the airlock. Ahsoka mistakenly assumes that Barriss has a crush on the Ani, and gets even MORE jealous.

Obi-Wan is like oh god. I can’t take care of an Anakin going through puberty again. He’s great with periods and other stuff because he read about a billion books. He is TERRIBLE with everything else, as he was the first time.

Barriss is like???? YOU'RE BOTH CHILDREN, PLEASE CALM DOWN, I HAVE ZERO INTEREST IN DATING ANYONE, LET ALONE SOMEONE YOUR AGE.

IDK how old Obi-Wan's Aniclone is, probably physically the same age as Ahsoka?

Per @atagotiak on discord:

Also something something, similarities btw Anakin and Obi-Wan where like. "Am I a parent? That seems uncomfortable, I'm too young to be a dad to a kid this age, I mean I'm cool with being a mentor/caretaker but..."

Obi-Wan can't even sidestep parenthood this time.

"Is Anakin basically your dad?" "Uhhhhhh" [Muffled discussion] "So Obi-Wan is your dad." "Okay!" "WAIT NO I DIDN'T AGREE TO THIS"

Ahsoka: She's stealing my brother, that BITCH. Obi-Wan's Aniclone: new sister new sister new sister gotta make a good impression

Firebird:

I feel like the Sister Squad would make very effective interstellar espionage agents Even like, kind of by accident. They just get encouraged to branch out in their interests and figure out what they want to do with their lives and end up all over the dang place, and since they're all pretty dang competent they tend to gravitate towards Important Positions wherever they end up. Except for one sister who just retires to raise Space Sheep.

I like that in this AU Palpatine is just like "I will create an army of Loyal Murderers who will obey my every whim and also be a big psychological lever on my Other Pet Murderer," and then they all just Baby Duckling imprint on the first Jedi to be nice to them instead and he has to just be like "Wait no not like that."

AND one of them Steals Boba

I want Obi-Wan's Aniclone to start dating Fives. All the sisters judge her for it, because he's a Goof. A very competent, ARC Trooper goof! But a goof.

Not as goofy as Anakin, though.

Firebird:

Who expects a clone of Anakin Skywalker to not make questionable lifelong romantic choices impulsively?

#Anakin Skywalker #Ahsoka Tano #Obi Wan Kenobi #Disaster Lineage #Sheev Palpatine #Skeevy Sheev #cloning #Yoda #Mace Windu #Skysisters AU #trans anakin skywalker #Phoenix Posts #hive mind #Padme Amidala #Anidala

[sohotthateveryonedied]

Fic Writer Interview

thanks @allthebooksandcrannies for tagging me!!

How many works do you have on AO3: 160!! yes i have a problem

Total AO3 word count: 844,446 oh god

How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?: 5 i think? dc comics, young justice, voltron, the teen titans cartoon once, and that one tiny fic i did for the lunar chronicles which is the only time i ever strayed from my fic-writing comfort zone lmao

Top 5 Fics (by number of kudos): the #1 fic is "obedience" with 3395 kudos, #2 is "don't touch me," #3 is "no pain, all gain," #4 is "hi bi, i'm dad," and #5 is "the same mistake twice" with 1353 kudos

Do I respond to comments, why or why not: i tried to respond to all of my comments at one point, but it was a lot of work to keep up and eventually i just gave up after a month of that. nowadays i try to respond to the longer comments that people put actual effort into or if they have a question or something

Do I write crossovers (and if so, what is the craziest?): nope nope nope. it's just not my thing (unless you count the ones where i give characters plots or traits from other forms of media like my "tim sees ghosts" au but that's about as crossover-y as it gets) (also julie and i come up with crossover ideas all the time but for my real, public writing, it's a hard no)

Have I ever received hate on a fic?: oh gosh so so SO many times. it's never fun

Do you write smut?: nah, it's not my thing. i've thought about it sure, just to branch out my writing style and to see if i'd be any good at it, but it doesn't match my audience so it's a no for now

Have you ever had i fic stolen: i hope not? i actually don't know what that means but it doesn't sound fun

Have you ever had a fic translated: yep! a couple have been translated into different languages and a few awesome people have done podfics for my stuff :)

Have you ever co-written a fic before: sort of? sometimes julie or i will write stuff together, but it's usually in a way where one of us will write a fic based on headcanons we've come up with together and then we'll credit the other when it's posted. there have been a few times when we've written actual fics together in the same document and everything, but i tend to step back and let julie do most of the work because i'm inherently bad at working with others and my instinct when partnered with other people is to shut down and let them take over everything 🤷‍♀️

What’s your all-time favorite ship: i don't know actually?? i'm sure i have one, but as far as writing goes, i tend to mostly lean on ships like jayroy, timsteph, spitfire, and birdflash occasionally. there are plenty of other ships that i care about way more than those four, but most of them i just haven't written for yet so yeah. for someone who's obsessed with love and romance, i'm pretty lukewarm on most ships

What's a WIP that you want to finish but probably never will: oh gosh. oh man. foster dad bruce au, my beloved. i love that fic with all my heart but like icarus, i forgot my sunglasses and rocketed straight into the ball of burning gas. this fic gives the phrase "bit off more than you can chew" a physical form. the fourth chapter has been sitting in its document half-written for months now and i know i vowed to never ever ever ever EVER post a fic and never finish it because i always hate when people quit on fics i like,,,,, there's a 50% chance that i will get back to that fic. it's just too long. i've only finished 3 out of 7 chapters and already it's at almost 59,000 words, i'm TIRED okay i'm sorry guys maybe one day i'll reclaim my braincells and finish that fucking thing

What are your writing strengths: i'm good with the mechanics and stuff, like the way my sentences are arranged and thought-out, but this is also my biggest weakness, which sucks. it's like in monsters university when mike spends so much time studying the technical aspect of scaring but he can't do it naturally like the other monsters can? yeah. i'm so focused on the mechanics of my writing that it's hard for me to let loose and actually let myself think and go loose with it. the only times i can really WRITE without one hand tied behind my back is when i'm overly tired or caffeinated. i have a feeling i'll be one of those writers who can't write anything of value without a bottle of wine lmao

What are your writing weaknesses: see above

What’s your thoughts on dialogue being written in other languages in fics: i don't know what this means?? is this asking whether i approve of dialogue being written in other languages?? or is it asking how i want it formatted?? what does this mean?? sometimes a story requires dialogue in another language, idk what to tell you man

First fandom you wrote for: oh god. don't make me think about my fanfiction.net days. i'm not strong enough (it was batfamily btw because what else do i write)

What’s your favorite fanfic you’ve written: my young justice gsa au <3 my pride and joy <3 that au was when i truly peaked as a human and it's only downhill from here <3

tagging uhhhhhh @damthosefandoms @haljordangreenjedi @catboykonel and @magebirdi because i have very few friends

#tag game #soho speaks

[chicknparm]

1. "Stay here tonight." + 31. "Calm down." Chaseprice

Uhhhhhh went a bit overboard with this one...it’s quite long and there’s some big big CWs for sex, alcohol, and mentions of abuse and suicide. Only felt right for the first Chaseprice scene I write to be extremely dark and angsty. Also gotta give credit to @chaseprice as the preeminent scholar in this field for letting me bounce ideas off of her and graciously editing.

“There...now get your hands off me.” Chloe says as she pushes Victoria’s arm away from her. 

“Well that’s a new one,” Victoria scoffs back, catching her breath. “Not in the mood to whine about being held this time?”

“Shut the fuck up.” Chloe says coldly.

Victoria watches her walk over to the mini fridge she keeps under the desk. Chloe reaches inside the freezer compartment and pulls out the bottle of Vodka that permanently occupies it. She unscrews the cap and takes a large swig, furrowing her face as she does so.

“What the fuck is your problem, Price? Do you have any idea how expensive Grey Goose is in this dump? Put that shit back right now.” She scolds. Chloe turns back at her.

“What are you going to do about it.” Chloe says, monotone and disinterested.

“Are you fucking kidding me right now? You of all people can’t pull this tough guy shit. What do you think I’m going to want to put you in your place and pounce on you or something? That’s not how this works, you’re not worth my energy. You come over, I cum, you cry, you leave. That’s how this works.”

“You think I want you to touch me right now?” Chloe says, raising her eyebrows. 

Clearly Chloe isn’t expecting, or doesn’t care to listen to, an answer, as she takes another large swig of Victoria’s Vodka and sets it down, still uncapped, on her desk. She grabs her tank top that was tossed over a chair and nonchalantly puts it on. Usually during this stage Victoria can’t help herself but to sneak a couple more glances at Chloe’s chest, but it’s becoming clear this isn’t some ploy to keep her turned on.

Chloe is always moody after sex, but not like this. Normally, she just has a breakdown and embarrasses herself with a flood of tears, and the words never cross either of their lips, but it’s understood who and what she’s crying over. Victoria likes it when Chloe is aggressive, a little angry, that’s kind of the whole deal, but this is different. 

“I think you want someone to touch you.” Victoria says with a cruel smirk, having found her angle.

“Who?”

“Wow, you really are a masochist huh?” Victoria smugly looks at Chloe, if Chloe wants to play with fire let her get burned. “ Rachel. Rachel Amber. Your fucking angel dream girl whatever the fuck. You know, the one who left? The one who disappeared without a word?”

“Yeah. I do. You do too though.” Chloe grabs the vodka again and takes another swig.

“You’re going to be so fucking trashed, Price, you already stank of cheap beer when you got here. If you throw up in my dorm I’ll make sure you never step foot on this campus again. But, anyway, what the fuck are you getting at?”

“You wish she was here too. You miss her touching you too.” Chloe says, starting to raise her voice. Several shots worth of vodka seem to be catching up to her now. “Whole fucking school knows you two hooked up. Whole school knows what you are, Vic.”

“You’re such a cunt.” Victoria bites back. She shouldn’t lose her cool though, she can’t give up control like that. “Well if you know that, then I guess you should also know that she fucks better than you do.”

“I know exactly how she fucks. You think I care about your stupid fuckin, fuckin dick measuring contest?” Chloe sloppily screws the cap back on the Vodka and slams it back into the freezer. She starts fumbling with her pockets. “Where’d I put my keys.”

“No,” Victoria says, much more softly than she intended, “go walk home, you’re not driving anywhere like this except headfirst into traffic.” 

“Put some clothes on, you’re embarrassing yourself.” Chloe says, continuing her search.

Victoria hadn’t even thought about the fact that she was still naked. Duly embarrassed, she grabs some shorts and a tank top of her own as nonchalantly as she can so as not to give Chloe any satisfaction. Vic looks over and sees her still searching around the dorm room, illuminated only by the moonlight through her window. 

Victoria doesn’t care about her. She’s just a sex toy, a dirty one at that, but this still doesn’t feel right.

“Knock it off, Price, seriously, go catch a bus with the rest of the drunks.”

“What the fuck do you care?! Stop acting like you give a shit!” Chloe finally snaps.

This is also new. The way Chloe is looking over at her, looking down at her, is different from all the times she’s hate-fucked her. Usually all it takes is some comments about her being poor, being pathetic, being lonely, that get her to hold Victoria down and be rough with her, just as she likes it. But there’s not an ounce of lust in her eyes tonight. Not an ounce of desire, just hate. Can’t be far from breaking her now. 

“I don’t. Go get turned to paste like your dad for all I care.”

That does the trick. Chloe stomps her way over to Victoria’s bed and screams in her face. “Don’t you ever fucking say a word about him!” She grabs Victoria by the chin, with more force than she’s ever touched her before. “Not one fucking word!”

Victoria doesn’t flinch. She barely blinks. She doesn’t know how to react. Chloe lets go of her face and steps away, her own mouth agape in shock.

“I-I…” Chloe starts, but falls to her knees and starts to sob.

“Calm down…” Victoria tries to maintain her detached tone but it’s not working. Chloe has never snapped like this. Never even come close to getting physical (in a way Victoria didn’t explicitly want). But she’s never hit Chloe below the belt the way she did just now either. Victoria obviously wanted a reaction, but she didn’t want this. Or, maybe she did want it, and what does that say about her? After what happened last semester she’d been trying to save that extra level of cruelty only for herself. But Chloe’s always been the exception. And now she’s seeing the result.

“Price, you’ve gotta...come on just…” Victoria stumbles over her words as Chloe continues to sob on the floor, “Chloe. Don’t do this.”

“I’m a fucking monster!” Chloe cries into her hands.

“You’re not, no, you’re not a monster. You’re a lot of things, but you’re not a monster.” Victoria’s voice is softening, almost against her will. Used to be Victoria could make girls cry without a second thought. Or if she did feel a pang of guilt, she could always drown those feelings later, but this situation is on the verge of danger.

“I am! Get drunk, come over here and hit you, I’m like him...I’m like him and, him and your dad.” Chloe says wiping her face on her arm.

“No. You’re not my dad, and you’re not your step-dad either. They’re the monsters. Neither of them feel anything when they hurt people.”

“I gotta fuckin...gotta…” Chloe slurs, trailing off at the end as she looks across the room and gets up from the floor. She walks over to Victoria’s closet and grabs her jacket from the handle. She fumbles with the pockets but Victoria can hear the jangling of a keychain inside.

“Chloe, no, don’t do this.” Victoria panics, grabbing Chloe by the arm. “Please. Don’t do this, I don’t want you to go out there and kill yourself.” She says through tears of her own.

“Well why didn’t you say that to fuckin Kate Marsh! She didn’t do, fucking anything to you! I deserve this, she didn’t.” Chloe says, looking away from Victoria.

Victoria’s grip tightens on Chloe’s arm. She’s right. Kate didn’t do anything to her. And she kept pushing that girl, and pushing her and pushing her, and now she’s dead. 

“No. Chloe, neither of you deserve to fucking die and I can’t let another person do this. Please, stay here tonight.”

Chloe finally looks at her. A mix of fear, anger, and self-loathing shine through her watery eyes in the moonlight. Victoria never saw Kate this close, but she wonders how many times she had that same look in her eyes. Chloe looks at the ground again and pulls to move away from Victoria, but Victoria doesn’t let go. Chloe tries taking a step forward, maybe thinking she could drag Victoria with her, but she loses her balance and falls to the floor. Victoria still holds onto her arm and kneels down next to Chloe, once again sobbing into the floor. Victoria lets out a sigh and finally lets herself feel just how much she’s been shaking. She will have to push Chloe out of the door as soon as she wakes up. 

Just because Victoria doesn’t have any love for Chloe doesn’t mean she wants to see her dead. Every other night from here on out she’ll be her own problem, but at least she’s safe. For now. Victoria reaches over and pulls a pillow and quilt off of her couch, properly setting Chloe up for the night. She’ll have to get up to get her a bucket soon, just in case. It’s a while before she lets go of her arm.

#chaseprice #explosionshark #mmmmbestie #thanks again for helping me with this morv #will have to write these two again sometime...maybe as part of cusp...eyes emoji #prompts

[janna-the-breaker]

How would the turtles react to the poopy diaper prank???

A//N:My sister and i watched a few videos about this prank and we laughed a lot. But i laughed more when i imagined the boys getting pranked by his s/o with this.

Warning: Turtle dads!!!!💙🐢❤️🐢💜🐢🧡🐢👨‍👦‍👦

You decided to give him a good lesson as he wasn't paying much attention to your baby boy/girl. He would just check if he/she doesn't need anything and would go back to his training/work out/computer/video games. You've warned him that he needed to pay a closer eye on your baby, and he would promise to do so. And always forget later. You had an idea to make sure that he wasn't going to forget about it ever again. You set up a clean diaper and pour a mix of peanutbutter and Nutella and left the diaper on the floor next to the baby, who quickly used his/hers tiny hands to eat the yummy and gross looking mix. You made sure to leave him/her on the kitchen floor so he/she would get caught easily, and you went back to pretend you were doing something else. May the prank begin!

Leo:

The fearless leader was training with his swords at the dojo. So, there was no way he would be the one who caught that scene. Acttualy, it was Raph. The big red masked turtle went to make himself a proteine shake, when she almost stumbled on his cute nephew/niece sitten on the floor. He noiticed that he/she was eating something, from a diaper. He instantly clicked what that might be and began to piss himself off. Snorting a lot more than Donnie does. He went to get his brother, not taking the wide smile on his face.

"Hey, number one dad! Your son/daughter has a little surprise for ya at the kitchen!" He announced as he continued to laugh. Leo frowned confusedly and went straight to the kitchen to see what was the trouble. Now, Leo have seen lots of crazy or scary stuff in his life. But, none of it could ever make him give such a girly scream like when he saw his son/daughter eating his own poop from a diaper.

"Holy Bushido!!! What are you doing, c/n?!" He quickly got him/her from the ground and examined his/her mouth. There was nothing but brown pasta. "Oh man! Your mom is gonna kill me!" He said as he tried to clean up the best he could, Raph laughing all along on the background. "Raph! Quit laughing and go get Donnie! Jeez, i'm a terrible father." He lamented as the guilt fell over him. Until he heard your laughs and turned to look at you very confused.

"How do you like the Peanautbutter, Fearless?!" You teased him as you kept laughing along with Raph. He had a serious frown now.

"Did you two set this up??" He asked agrily.

"Don't look at me! I'm the one who found him/her." He said in defensive mode.

"I set this up, Leo! So you can learn not to leave our baby unsupervised. This is one of the things that can happen if he's/she's left alone." You scolded him and he looked down in defeat.

"Alright, i got it. Sorry, akachan." He said kissing his baby on the cheek and even got some of the Peanautbutter on his face. You went to give him a kiss and your mouth was covered on it as well. This day was last long remembered and brought lots of laughs when brought back.

Raph:

The big cuddly teddy bear was in the middle of a work out section, when Leo, who was only going to take a bath, found his little nephew/niece sitten in there, with a "dirty" diaper on it's hands and his/her mouth covered in brown pasta. He got instantly disgusted, and next, furious. He had the feeling that Raph couldn't handle himself all of the responsabilities of having a baby in his life. He grabbed the baby in his arms and brought him/her to the gym, where he leaned the small being to his father who turned at them confused.

"What happened?! Why is his/her mouth covered with goo??"

"You should've known! You're his/her father, Raphael! I found him/her eating from the diaper." Said the older brother angrily. Raph's eyes widened when he told him what that goo might be. He quickly took the baby in his arms and looked around desperatly.

"Shit! Literaly shit!!! What am i gonna do now?? Uh, i know! I gotta clean him/her!" He rushed to the kitchen with the baby and placed him/her on the sink. He took a lot of tissues and used to wipe the infant's face. "Shell, i am totaly sleeping on the couch tonight."

"You would if it was for real." You said as you showed up at the kitchen with a vitorious look. He looked back at you and then to the baby, trying to figure what was happening. "That's not poop, Raph! Don't worry, he'll/she'll be okay."

"Damn! Ya gave me a scare here!" He exclaimed with a hand on his chest. Relieved that his son/daughter wasn't acttualy eating his/her own poop.

"Unless you want this to happen for real someday you better keep and eye on him/her."

"Alright, i needed a little helper at the gym anyway." He said and the two of you chuckle as the baby pointed to the Peanautbutter jar, wanting more of it.

Donnie:

Mikey was the one who found the baby at the kitchen when he was going to make himself a snack. When he saw that mucky substance spread all over the baby's mouth and tiny hands he entered in shock. He have heard that kids can make a mess, but this was riddiculous! And kinda funny too. He went to get his brother at his lab, who were working on another project.

"Uhhhhhh... Brah?! I think you should see this." He couldn't find the words to say that his son/daughter was covered in poop.

"Not now, Mikey! I'm very busy." Said Donnie in a serious tone.

"But, brah, this is serious. It's c/n..."

"WHAT HAPPENED?! IS HE/SHE HURT?! PAPA'S ON THE WAY!!!" He panicked when he learn that it had to do with his baby and rushed looking around for him/her. He finaly found his son/daughter with his/her mouth and face covered with his/her own droppings.

"Nononononono!!! Oh my god! Spit that out! Spit it!" He said desperatly, and kinda loud which caused the baby to cry. However, Donnie was more preocupied with all of the germs and bacteria that he/she might have consumed and was ready to take him/her to his lab and perform a stomach wash on his baby.

Until you showed up to safe the day.

"Hey! Donnie, it's okay! This isn't real!" You tried to calm him down from the inicial scare.

"I'm sorry, what?!" He said in disbelief.

"I set the whole thing up. This is just Nutella!" You said taking the jar you used for the prank. He took a deep sigh as he calmed the baby down.

"Oh thank goodness! It's okay, c/n, daddy is sorry for screaming at you." He cooed as he pets the baby's back gently. "I took the lesson from this one, those projects can wait. The two of you are the best projects of my life." He said as he brings you for a hug with him. Nuzzling on you and then on his son/daughter, covering his face with Nutella too. "And, time for bath!"

Mikey:

The big sunshine turtle was on a Mario Kart maraton, totaly foucused on his game. Donnie was looking for a certain joystick that he remembered to have borrowed to Mikey. So, he went to look for it at his room. That's where he found his baby boy/girl making a mess with what was in the diaper and even putting it on his/her mouth. Donnie used all of his self control not to throw out to what he saw and went to call his brother.

"Jesus Christ, Mikey! You can't leave a child all alone like that! Just take a look at what he/she have done, gross!" He scolded his younger brother who paused the game and went to get to his baby. Almost passing out when he saw his little boy/girl looking like some goo monster from his comic books.

"Yuck! Baby, that's not for eating! You let it out, you can't let it in anymore!" He said as he picks the baby up and started thinking on what to do now. "To the shower! To the shower!" He demanded as he quickly took all of the suplies, like towels, wipes and rubber ducks. He filled the litte thub with water and places the undressed infant onto it, starting to use a sponge to wash his/her face. "That's it, buttercup! Daddy is screwed! You problably don't know what that means, but daddy is in big trouble. I think we should move and change our names, what do you think??" He asked as the baby laughed at the bubbles he made. The orange masked turtle chuckled at the innocent life he have created with the girl he loves.

And, speaking of you, you were standing at the door watching as he was being such a great father. "Isn't it as fun as playing with video games?!" You commented and he looked at you with puppy dog eyes.

"I'm sorry, angelcakes! I wasn't paying attention on him/her. I'm a terrible father. Do you forgive me??" He cooed as you came closer to them."

"Of course i forgive you, Mikey! Acttualy, this whole thing was a prank anyway." You confessed before laughing at him. He looked at you in disbelief but then began to laugh as well.

"Yo, girl! You really got me this time. Hope you're prepared for our revenge." He said looking at his baby with a little wink as he/she played with a rubber duck.

#i wheezed so hard making this #turtle dads #tmnt leonardo #tmnt raphael #tmnt donatello #tmnt michelangelo #tmnt bayverse #tmnt x reader #tmnt 2k16 #tmnt 2k14

[h3trappedcollection]

Author Interview Part VII

@ctl-yuejie does us the honours and answers the questions for our next Author Interview! 🎉

Stories written for the Collection:

when you want to call in sick for work, to have them return your boyfriend

Fox’s lair

Interview:

How did you come into the Trapped fandom?

I am very fond of HIStory2 Crossing The Line and the ChocoTV team so I tried to keep up with news about their next content and a cop x gangster series just sounded delightfully silly. I really enjoyed everyone gathering together to talk about and create content for this show, so the fandom drew me more to the show than the other way around.

Who’s your favourite character?

Hmmmmm....I think I like Shaofei the most. To me he is the most interesting character. His honesty and openness without a care for how awkward he might come across usually would make me cringe and feel second-hand embarrassment but he does it so innocently without seeming pitiful and has a lot of strength behind his positive attitude, which in turn makes me admire him a lot. He is a unique character I haven’t come across so far. Out of the supporting cast I love Andy and Jun Wei. Andy because...he’s Andy and Jun Wei because if his snarky comments all the time.

What’s your favourite trope?

Found family!! And Trapped had some of that so I was more than happy! (Although my dislike of the dad parent trope kind of balances it out by a bit)

What do you like about writing for Trapped?

All the characters are a lot of fun to write and the good (?) thing about Trapped is that some of the motivations and background stories weren’t flashed out that much due to the limited number of episodes. There is a strong set-up with much left for the imagination to work with so they are just so many opportunities. The mix of sad backstory and slapstick romcom also makes it easier to write for the characters in very different genres. Somehow I am particularly interested in getting into the supporting roles’ background stories and post-canon development. I would love to get a sequel with more of leather jacket police woman and Yiqi. All my love to @florbexter at this point, because without her doing so much for the fandom and organizing the H3 Trapped Collection I wouldn’t necessarily have written anything for the fandom.

Care to elaborate on your writing process?

I write everything in one go, at least as long as I can and then later go over it and fix sentences. My biggest challenge is not changing my tone during a longer piece so I try to get the bone structure done as quickly as possible.

Your favourite Trapped fic by another author?

just waiting, waiting (on you) by @stebeee

Tousled by @alipeeps

The fabric of my heart by @piningbisexuals

Rawr in dinosaur means I love you by @florbexter

manifestly by @sarah-yyy

Gauging the Field by scy

What softness could (not) bestow by @weilongfu

But it has been some time and I bet there are many more fabulous fics out there. @weilongfu ‘s oneshots about Jack and Zhaozi are always a lot of fun and @florbexter has nice ficlets featuring about just every character I adore.

What do you want to write but never had the nerve to?

Uhhhhhh, I want to write so many things but don’t have the time to do so.  It is a very sad thing because I’d love to create some more content for Andy and his boyfriend and TangFei. I want Shaofei to take on a case and home husband Tangyi providing surprise back-up from the kitchen. Really want to see Shaofei shine as an investigator and them solving a case with their combined abilities. Attending a fancy gala under disguise (in suits provided by Tangyi’s tailoring business, Zhao Zi getting lost at the buffet, and an awesome chase scene through the event hall). But first of all I have to get back to reading Trapped fanfiction, because there’s so much great content out there.

If you want, please share a snippet of your current Trapped WIP!

sadly, there is no trapped wip at the moment. blame my workload ;A; (but thank you for including me in these interviews <3 )

Thank you for your answers @ctl-yuejie

#h3trappedcollection #history 3: trapped #history 3: 圈套 #author interview

[queeruma]

Thoughts on Escape from the Isle of the Lost

under the cut because spoilers

good things 

Celia is Fantastic. reads fortunes, cheeky, realises her own potential and does magic with her shadow. 10/10 would die for

Uma misses her crew, also it’s confirmed that she can create storms and generally affect the weather, and transform into more than one sea creature. in general she seems to be a natural when it comes to magic.

Harry is miserable bc uma’s not there. the crew are still on the ship.

‘But all she felt for this ragged, unruly crowd was deep empathy and affection. Mal wished they could all understand that there were greater things to live for than revenge or violence or pettiness, greed, and graft.’ mal is... suddenly the person most interested in helping the kids on the isle?? i’m not sure how I feel about it but if they’re going to position her as ‘the liberator’ then at least they’re making her act like it

Dr facilier is very fun and also the most decent parent we’ve seen by far

‘Mal would never forget her name, or who freed the Isle of the Lost: UMA.’ okay so at least uma’s still interested in freeing the isle, even if they’re implying it’s only because she knows mal wants to 

MDLC has finally realised that it’s spelt ‘deux’, and not ‘doux’

bad things

idk basically everything else??

i might have said this before on this blog but MDLC is really, really bad at making the core four in any way sympathetic to me. this book is by far the worst from that standpoint.

we don’t get to see a lot of the core four actually being friends. they do stuff together (not even that much bc they’re constantly with their significant others instead), but that Bond between them just isn’t there.

carlos honest to god forgets that there’s nothing nice on the Isle. He brings his spa bathrobe with him. He was expecting a hotel. What on earth?????

jay just... doesn’t really think about the Isle. At All.

evie is still going on about kids ‘deserving’ to go to auradon.

mal has done a complete 180 and now loves doing all the things she hated doing in d2.

they’re all kind of spoiled now. it sucks. 

dizzy is still on the isle. somehow no one is fighting very hard to get her to auradon anymore.

ben is suddenly way more like his parents in terms of his attitude towards the isle. he still wants to unite them eventually, but he and mal literally negotiate how many kids can come to auradon with him arguing for lower numbers and her arguing for higher. as far as I can tell, when Ben and Mal swapped saliva at the end of d2 they also swapped attitudes towards the isle

hades is whiny, annoying and pathetic. and Mal’s dad (at least they’re hinting Very Strongly at it). he doesn’t match the energy we’ve seen from cheyenne jackson in the trailers at all. we don’t hear a single one of the ideas from the meet hades trailer at any point.

the ‘evil plot’ between him and uma is.... just uma. who is only interested in revenge against mal now. no more interest in the isle. nope, we have to bring down the barrier just so uma can defeat mal. 

There’s a royal council. It’s ben, king beast, queen belle, mal, and fairy godmother. they sit and eat scones, served by mrs potts, chip, lumiere and cogsworth. beast is very grumpy because people want to help the villain kids. 

carlos’ name in their group chat is ‘c-dog’

‘Ben had sympathy for the kids on the Isle, but he wasn’t sure he really wanted his friends to go back there. Wasn’t it too dangerous?’ WHAT DO YOU THINK IT IS FOR THE KIDS WHO ARE STUCK THERE, BEN

“Dangerous? Not to us,” scoffed Jay. “We know every trick in the book.” Jay. Baby. Last time you went back, you lost Ben in about 30 seconds despite two of you standing with him the entire time. The time before that, Maddy literally came this close to drowning Mal.

‘For a brief moment, back at the Auradon Cotillion, she had been a princess; she had stood on the deck of a magnificent ship, and Ben was hers. He had looked in her eyes with love—sure, he had been spelled, but who really cared? Except in the end, that’s all it was—a brief moment.’ SINCE WHEN IS THIS SOMETHING UMA WANTED. MELISSA TURN ON LOCATION I JUST WANT TO TALK

“Do we really need to discuss this right now?” King Beast yawned. GUILLOTINE. GUILLOTINE! SORRY BEN YOU’RE JUST GONNA HAVE TO BE LIKE THE REST OF THE CHARACTERS AND ONLY HAVE ONE PARENT.

“We hear from our people that Uma has been seen underwater. She’s out there, free to wreak havoc and do whatever she wants.” okay but has she though. or is she not bothering you at all. guys.

“It’s just, her mother… her mother almost destroyed my family.” yes. and then her mother was killed. and then YOUR FAMILY TOOK PART IN BRINGING HER BACK FROM THE DEAD AND IMPRISONING UMA FOR LIFE FOR HER MOTHER’S CRIMES

mal is aware that her mother is out there somewhere as a lizard.... and she does not give a damn.

apparently it has not occurred to any of the core four that maybe children shouldn’t have to apply to be able to have decent food. maybe try telling ben to stop sending them trash?? and start sending them stuff that’s edible instead of trying to convince them to come to auradon so they can eat

okay, so facilier’s like a semi-decent headmaster, even if it is of a school of evil. does he like.... get paid?? because he’s working with auradon here. i hate to bring this up disney but keeping someone in prison and forcing them to work for free is uhhhhhh. slavery.

‘if Celia deserved to get in to Auradon Prep, she would. But it would be on her own merit, not because the VKs swayed the committee.’ WHAT FUCKING MERIT EVIE. SHES LIKE 12. SHE DOESNT NEED TO EARN THE RIGHT NOT TO BE IN PRISON. YOU DIDNT FUCKING WELL HAVE TO.

gaston is a coach. this isn’t a massive problem but I feel like it kind of undermines jay’s relationship with his coach in d1?? also since when does gaston know literally anything about teamwork.

the Marry Hint 

cj is back on the isle???

MDLC wrote out the whole of the under the sea mess and i understand it even less than before. was the entire thing a hallucination from hades??? why even put harry, gil and dizzy in there??? was uma using her necklace in some way? how much of it was hallucination?? did any of it happen??

doc brought up the goblins back in the first book. this is the fourth book. nothing has changed for them, except for the things that have got worse

................. mal’s friends seem to have forgotten that she can’t swim. apparently they’re not afraid of her drowning, despite her being stuck underwater. 

mal can swim underwater as a dragon apparently??? yes, she’s definitely designed for rapid underwater movement

“A haircut? At this time of night?” asked Carlos. “I’ll never understand women.” first the friendzone comment in d2, now this??? why are they so determined to make carlos a Certified Heterosexual Bro™

they get the isle kids to watch them graduate. somehow this is written like it’s a good thing.

everyone forgets what happened on the isle. I can only assume this is MDLC’s way around the fact that it won’t be mentioned or thought of at any point during the movie

#eftiotl spoilers #h speaks #eftiotl

[b00bconnoisseur]

60 questions for @not-my-brain

1. selfie.......Ugghhhh ok. Imma take one rn

Ok here u go (yes thats a bmth shirt)

2. what would you name your future kids?.....Ooo hmmm well when i was a kid i really liked the names disney, and mesiah. I didn't know at the time that mesiah was another name for god i think lol. I liked it cause of handlers mesiah. I still do. Ooo and maybe Tj too

3. do you miss anyone?......Yeah. My friends on Pinterest from a year ago. My friend lucas. Stan lee. Bob ross. My cousin who died from cancer some years ago. Snape. Sirius. Lupin. Tonks. Dobby. *continues to name every unfortunate death in hp*

4. what are you looking forward to?.......SE-YA next month!! Its the south eastern young adult festival at this college. You can have meet n greets with authors and alot of stuff its the besstttt

5. is there anyone who can always make you smile?......DEFINATELY. @dirtysocke @mysisterlooksforthisaccountsobye @cristal-kyd1280 @sammchenry my friend lucas and @septembersbloom. ^^

6. is it hard for you to get over someone?..... What like...romantically? Or like a death? If romantically uhhh idk it took over a couple weeks but im ok now. Ive never had another relationship so idk. If death oof yeah idk maybe. Ig it depends on how much i knew them idk. Like when my nanny (great grandma) died i was sad for days (is that alot?)

7. what was your life like last year?.....Sucky af. Still is. But the highlights of my life last year was getting and making friends on tumblr, going to the tøp concert and going to warped tour, volunteering at the library, going to seya and meeting some of my favorite authors, reading, changing and improving my art, listening to all the bands i listen to now, getting into more fandoms, going to a friends house for the first time

8. have you ever cried because you were so annoyed?.......Yes lol. Some years ago when i couldn't find smtn id be so annoyed and pissed id start crying. I dont now but still lol

9. who did you last see in person?.......Hm ig family doesn't count....? Wait do u mean a friend? If so uhh my friends rebekah, anika, and Judah at a TAB meeting at the library sometime last month.

10. are you good at hiding your feelings?......I think so? Like i mean I can hide whenever i get my....time of the month from my mom (talking abt stuff like that with her makes me uncomfortable) and i hid a breakup. And other p big stuff too. So imma say yeah

11. are you listening to music right now?........*pops on earbuds after reading this* yee im listening to bitch lasagna by pewdiepie xD (do i have the best spotify playlist or what?)

12. what is something you want right now?.......To hug @mysisterlooksforthisaccountsobye but SOMEONE has to live so far away

13. how do you feel right now?........Happy that my earbud still works cause they got washed in the wash yesterday....oops. Its not my fault. I told my dad to remind me to take it out of my jacket pocket before they threw it in but noooooo he forgot

14. when was the last time someone of the opposite sex hugged you?.......Uhhhhh fuck idk it was probably from my lil 4 yr old bro sometime last week. Other than him (hes my favorite sibling) i dont let them hug me too much

15. personality description.......Nerdy. Fangirl. "Emo". Tomboy. Hotsause obsessed. Book lover. Music lover. Black. Blue. Harry potter. Introvert. Fall. Sports. Values friendship. Loyal. Uhhhh i cant think of much lol

16. have you ever wanted to tell someone something but you didn’t?.......*sigh* yes. Yes yes yes. Theres some things abt me, or my life really, that i havent told anyone on here or my irl friends that i sooooo want to so bad but i haven't cause i feel like they'd feel bad and pity me and i don't want that

17. opinion on insecurities........I dont really understand this one. Everyones insecure abt something. Is this askin like if i think its ok or not? I say its ok. Im insecure about literally everything about me. My face. My personality. My socialness. My art. What i do. What i say. Basically my whole body. The things i feel good abt are my books, music taste, and my friends (ily fuckers)

18. do you miss how things were a year ago?.........Hmm this time around a year ago....idk its sorta the same but all the stuff i mentioned abt my year from last year didn't happen yet so nah tho my life sucks rn its better than this time last year

19. have you ever been to New York?........Nooo but i want too soo baddd i wanna visit @septembersbloom !! Im coming for ya soon gramps *does the eye watching thing* my dads been to nyc before tho cause he does construction and he had a concrete job to do there. It was a 23 hr drive for him

20. what is your favourite song at the moment?........Uhhh idk!!! So hard! Maybe.....the whole thats the spirit album by bmth ;)

21. age and birthday?.....15 yrs of age and September 27th 2003 (whats yours brainy? I'll put it on my calendar)

22. description of crush......Its weird idk im not sure if its a genuine crush or not but uh....They like hp :).Thats all u get

23. fear(s).......Losing my best friend @dirtysocke and my other friends. Death. Failure. Momo chasing after me then killing me slowly keeping my eyes open to look her dead in the eyes while i die

24. height......5'6 call me short and I'll fuck u up with THIS *pulls out trusty potato peeler named now steve* dont test me boi

25. role model......Hhhhhhhh so many! But uh gosh one of them is @superraedizzle (youtuberrrr) and vexx and bob ross and da vinci and aaaaaaa so many

26. idol(s)......First person that immediately comes to mind is @sammchenry cause he's super cool and he's really nice and his art's reallyyy good (if u havent seen it w-w-what are u even doin with your life?) And he has a great sense of humor and *continues to ramble about why samms the best*

27. things i hate.......Dabs. Transphobes. Homophobic ppl. Basically any hate on the lgbtq+ community. Bullies. The ship starker. Umbridge. Snape haters

28. i’ll love you if….....U you'll eat pizza, draw, and rp harry potter with mee

29. favourite film(s)......Fantastic beasts. Every hp film. Twilight. The maze runner 1-2. The hunger games. Spiderman homecoming. Kingsman: secret service. Into the spideyverse tho i havent seen it yet

30. favourite tv show(s)......Inkmasterrrrr. B99. The mick. The middle. Uhhh idk mostly ink master xD

31. 3 random facts........Ive never had shrimp. I had a beta fish for over a year once. Im eating pizza crust rn

32. are your friends mainly girls or guys?.......G i r l s. I have all girl friends irl and one boy. And on tumblr it seems like i just meet girls? Likei agree with @cristal-kyd1280 its like alot more gals then dudes here. But i do have some guy friends on here too. But mostly girls

33. something you want to learn.......TO DRAW ANATOMY DAMMIT

34. most embarrassing moment........Every moment of my lifes an embarrassing moment. Idk of i can pick a "most" embarrassing one. But one time i i sent my crush (now ex bf) a hey fuckface and like some hearts or whatever for an ask game that meant like "i have a crush on u" "youre adorable" etc and said Hewo but i did it all anonymously. But he confronted me askin if i sent it cause im the only person he knows that actually says hewo lol. Then later on i finally admitted i really liked him and well y'all know the story after i think. Unless you're new

35. favourite subject.......A R TTTT OFC

36. 3 dreams you want to fulfill?........meet my friends on tumblr. Get into mtsu (college i wanna go to) and study art. And go skydiving

37. favourite actor/actress........favorite actor uhhhhhh probably thomas brodie sangster or tom felton and my favorite actress? Hmmm idk maybe evanna lynch (luna lovegood)

38. favourite comedian(s).......probably kevin hart lol he's p funny

39. favourite sport(s)........basketballllllll and football

40. favourite memory........uhhhhh idk?? One oh my favorite memories was when we went to see tøp in concert

41. relationship status.....single as a pringle

42. favourite book(s)......harry potter and the order of the pheonix. Harry potter and the half blood prince. Simon vs the homo sapiens agenda. Divergent. Maze runner. Twilight. Fangirl. Fallen. Red queen

43. favourite song ever.......TOO HARD DONT MAKE ME CHOOSEEEEEE

44. age you get mistaken for.........16 and 17 sometimes lol

45. how you found out about your idol........i was watching someone on yt and superraedizzle always poped up in my feed and my mom turned on one of her vids cause she always saw her vids too now ive seen most of em i love her. Id heard of vexx but never watched him and i was watching a collab from anthony miller art and shrimpy and i checked out shrimpys channel and was lookin at comments and alot of ppl said his art is like vexxs so i checked out vexx. At first i was like eh ok. Now i cant click fast enough when he posts a vid. And i actually fpund out about bob ross from my grandpa on jan 20 2017 when trump was getting sworn in or whatever. We turned on pbs and my grampa told me to look and bob ross was on and i was IN. I loved it. I even started watching full episodes on YouTube of the joy of painting after that. Wonderful man. My first painting i ever did i think was when i followed one of his tutorials xD (i didnt know it was popular at the time)

46. what my last text message says......."ok your turn"

47. turn ons.....uhh nerds ig idk um book lovers, music lovers, art lovers, potterheads, idk and nice ppl

48. turn offs......jerks. Homophobia. Idk ig whatever i said in things i hate

49. where i want to be right now......uhhhh idk wait didn't i already answer this? Ok this ones different ig so uhh with my friend lucas

50. favourite picture of your idol.....oh shit...favorite? Idk xD i have a fave of vexx but not of rae or bob. But heres pics of them any way

51. starsign......a libraaaaa boiii

52. something i’m talented at......drawing and speed reading. Thats about it lol. Oh and procrastina

53. 5 things that make me happy.......ooooo art, my friends here on tumblr, books, harry potter, and music ^^

54. something thats worrying me at the moment.....if my friend thinks im being annoying

55. tumblr friends......hhhhh so manyyyyyy. @dirtysocke @mysisterlooksforthisaccountsobye @cristal-kyd1280 @chinesewaffles2 @kingantlion @queen-baelin @sammchenry @septembersbloom and more

56. favourite food(s)......green beans, pepperoni pizza, and vanilla madelines

57. favourite animal(s).......basically any reptile. Puppies. Cats. Any animal really but my #1 are snakes

58. description of my best friend.....well she's a tiny bean (5 feet) and she has dark hair, she wears glasses, she doesnt take shit, she's in love with Josh dun, she's awesome, funny, nice (YES youre nice jackie) and shes the best friend ive ever had. Oh. And she has a weird obsession with spaghetti

59. why i joined tumblr.......well i heard abt it on Pinterest over a year ago but didnt want it. Then @mrfastbass-deactivated20181231 on DeviantArt said he got tumblr so i made one then followed him and figured id just post art and that's it cause i thought tumblr was boring as hell when i first got it. Now im p much obsessed with it

60. ask me anything you want.......go ahead brainy shoot. Give me smtn good

#my face #mutual peeps #not-my-brain #asks #60 questions

[ldarchive]

all or some of: 10, 18, 19, 20, 25, 28, 30, 35, 36, 39, 40, 41, 42 for the ask meme =) lay all the ari facts on me

ty indigo ilu… shepardposting no limits (HOPEFULLY THE READMORE WORKS?)

10. What kind of friend is Shepard?

the “will give you shit but also go to the ends of the earth” for you type i suppose…he shows his affection thru gentle bullying. he can also be kind of genuinely an overbearing asshole at times, but he gets better with it; it takes him a while to, uh, adjust to having “friends” in the first place. he’s a dad friend if your dad is kind of a grumpy punk with a rude and morbid sense of humor

18. Share a headcanon about Shepard and their LI.

[struggling to come up with something i haven’t talked about a million times] uhhhhhh

kaidan wanted to propose with one of his dad’s old rings but he figured out it wouldn’t fit ari’s finger, so (with his mother’s blessing/assurance that his dad would have been more than happy abt it, etc) he had the gold melted down to make a new ring. in my mind it looks smth like this and yes ari totally cried a little

it also took kaidan weeks of near-misses to work up the nerve to propose even tho he Knew ari was gonna say yes, he was just really worried about getting it right. eventually he just did it on their balcony and ari got surprised and dropped his cigarette and kaidan got a cool new engagement burn scar on his arm but it was nice

19. Why did they fall for each other?

ari fell for kaidan bc he’s not just intelligent, but perceptive; he’s a realist who errs toward optimism and making the best of bad situations; he believes people can and should be better; he has a surprisingly understated sense of humor; he can keep up with ari’s teasing; ari asks him if he’s a romantic and he denies it and then gives, like, the most romantic answer in the world. he’s cute.

kaidan fell for ari bc……. he has big arm. ok but uh i think it’s because he’s, pretty practical and matter of fact and doesn’t care all that much about the social trappings that kaidan continually tortures himself with… he makes kaidan feel Seen and Understood but doesn’t make a big dramatic deal out of everything kaidan tells him, he just treats him… like a person. for someone who’s been living with & defining themselves by their issues for as long as kaidan has, it’s pretty incredible to find someone who just makes him feel like a human being again

20. What are their common interests or hobbies?

a lot of their relationship is like, meeting each other in the middle haha, but there are some things they both enjoy a lot with no caveats:

- cooking! kaidan’s a foodie and it becomes ari’s therapy hobby after me3, so it’s smth they enjoy doing together a lot. they try to do it more often if possible, but their general friday night tradition is to come home, crack open a couple beers, and cook a big meal together

- they are both outdoorsy Adventure Dads… it takes a while before ari can handle more than a walk around the park but eventually he and kaidan can go hiking again and they both rly love it. i imagine theyd be into stuff like camping, swimming, kayaking, etc too dfjnfg

25. Is there something they fight about?

well, everyone gets into arguments occasionally, but i don’t really think they fight all that often… not that they agree on everything all the time, but they’ve both gotten pretty good at talking things out and also deciding whether or not something is even worth arguing about in the first place. when you are dating someone during the apocalypse and don’t have to any time to waste those are both pretty valuable skills haha [i think the most they ever fought in their relationship was post-me3, when ari got out of the hospital and they’d both started to ‘settle in’ to their new lives but it was a bumpy adjustment and they were both going thru a lot of trauma and stress and bottling it up etc. it wasnt a great time but they worked thru it]

28. What would they like to change about the other?

it’s a double-edged sword, bc it’s part of what attracts kaidan to him as well, but sometimes kaidan really wishes ari had more a self-preservation instinct!! sometimes his tendency to charge headfirst into trouble is sexy, sometimes kaidan is tired and sad and it just gets really old

ari wishes kaidan would loosen up a little although, again, the straight-laced military thing (unfortunately) kinda does it for him. he would also take away kaidans chronic pain if he could

30. When did they realise they fell in love?

fr kaidan it was shortly after virmire and it absolutely scared the shit out of him ahaha

ari is dumb so he didn’t really realize until after horizon, which was probably a bad way to figure that out,35. Is there anything they dislike about the other?

ari appreciates how thoughtful kaidan is but sometimes it’s like… a bit… much lmao, he’s not as navel gaze-y as kaidan is so sometimes the process of having to talk everything out gets tiring. for kaidan it’s kind of the opposite, he sometimes perceives ari’s lack of forethought as a lack of care, which isn’t really true, he just works differently

on a much pettier level, ari gets annoyed that kaidan wants to sleep in all the time and kaidan gets annoyed that ari drowns all his food in hot sauce. hello, i worked hard on that steak36. What are their best memories together?

advtykefd cheesy but i like to think they got to take a little bit of leave after me1 so… they rented a log cabin somewhere (not sure if they went back to earth or just a colony planet somewhere?), turned off non-emergency comms on their omnitools and just chilled for a bit… went hiking, had drinks at the tiny bar in the closest small town, holed up in the cabin all day and had sex lmao it was probably the most peaceful week of aris entire life and it left a big impression on him

ofc later there’s stuff like their wedding day, their son’s birth, adopting their daughter etc. kaidan would probably even say, with the emotional distance provided by time, that horizon counts cuz even tho it sucked at the time nothing could have been better than realizing ari was alive

40. Is there someone in the squad of ME/ME2/ME3 Shepard dislikes? Why?

MIRANDA LOL… they just. do not see to eye or get along at all. i find their relationship very entertaining for this reason bc the dynamic of commander & XO who are both trying to be professional but do not respect e/o even the tiniest bit is so funny. theres a convo w her in me2 (i think it might be the one where you can initiate her romance?) where if you choose the renegade dialogue is hilarious to me… miranda makes some snide, passive aggressive comment about shepard based on their background (it’s like “it’s amazing how you’ve managed to succeed despite being _____” lmao) and then shepard is like “OH i get it, you’re jealous bc i’ve been more successful than you and TIM likes me more even tho i’m a big piece of shit idiot?” i love it it’s so funny. they both suck. eventually they do build some kind of mutual respect btwn them but theyre still… not exactly friends. i think in me3 ari was like “damn i hope miranda’s ok” and then when he actually met her again remembered why he used to be so pissed at her all the time lmao. (after me3 tho she saves his life Again and they probably have a lot of time in the hospital to just talk so maybe they do become genuine friends)

41. Are there any important relationships in Shepard’s past that defined their character? /42. Is there someone who had a great influence on Shepard?

just gonna try to combine these i guess,

- his parents, although he only got an unfortunate short time with them, he takes after both of them a lot, and the things his parents imparted on him stuck with him, but especially as he gets older he’s also really aware of the mistakes they made

-the reds, in general. not a really positive influence lmao but. they were his home for years & he learned how the world works through them, for better or worse… it’s why he’s a bit of a cynic, although later he is able to characterize it more as “this shit sucks But we can make it better” rather than just “this shit sucks”

- anderson was the first person ari ever felt saw him as a human being, and it was… a slow-going thing to learn to trust him ahah, but wanting to be worthy of anderson’s approval shaped a lot of his career decisions

#neositter #ask #oc: ari shepard

[deeeelightfuldee]

When was the last time you felt like “getting into someone’s pants”? hahaha no comment 

What is your favorite energy drink, if you have a favorite at all? i dont like energy drinks. just not my thing.

Would you have kids with the last person you kissed? no, no, no. definitely not.

Do you know someone who threatens to kill themselves? I have. all of them have luckily gone to extensive therapy and have not reported suicidal ideations for some time now.

Would you ever completely dye your hair the color green? no. that just looks like youve been swimming in chlorine too long

Have you ever been in a long-distance relationship before? yes. honestly, idk about doing that again. it’s so easy for someone else to be living a double life and for me to be invested without knowing 

What is your favorite food to eat around Christmas? omg everything. I love the wintertime foods.

Do the people in your town speak like rednecks? No. the accent in my area is the accent used for most movies. it’s considered to be neutral.

When was the last time you cried happy tears? umm. wow, it’s been a long time.

How liberal are you? i’m more of a i-hate-the-ugliness-in-politics-and-the-way-it-divides-people type of person

Would you mind living near large predatory animals? ummm, I guess it would depend. I don’t think I’d be bothered by living near bears.

Have you ever experienced altitude sickness? oooooooo my goodness yes. I was on a mission trip one time through the smokies and we drove through i think it’s called devils triangle and we were driving in a huge church van. it. was. so. bad. everyone was throwing up.

What’s your biggest priority right now? probably to become employed

If you’ve stayed overnight in a hospital, how did you entertain yourself? sleeping, tv. the last time I was there overnight for myself I was on such extreme meds I was sleeping for days.

Are your hands unsteady? Typically they’re quite steady. right now tho I am constantly shaking from weakness so I have a ways to go.

Do you listen to a lot of mainstream music? I would say half of my music is. 

Do you think you’re pretty? i think I have some pretty features

Have you ever added someone you don’t know on Facebook? uhhhhhh i have when it’s like following a page of a person with a medical condition and it’s like an update account or something like that. I don’t really know, i’m never ever ever on facebook.

Do you have dirty pictures in your phone? I have pictures of myself that are sultry but not nudes. other people send me nudes allllllll the time but i try to keep up with deleting those.

Would you ever shoot someone right in the face? man I am just so so so non-violent that it would be hard to. but if someone was coming for my family members or someone I loved, i like to think I would.

Have you ever sold drugs? nope. drugs are just absolutely not my thing

Did you ever try cutting yourself? eh.

Who’s the last guy you texted? either chip, nathan, or michael

Who do you know that wears the most make up? people that i surround myself with wear very minimal makeup.. if any at all right now. I wear the most in comparison. 

Do any of your friends have kids? two of them yes

Have you ever been tied up? yes.

How many times have you been cussed out? goodness I dont know the number. my dad used to do while I was growing up that during his rage moments. once in a while a customer would at bbb if they disliked store policies or we didn’t have something in stock -.-

Are you anyone’s first love? hmmm. I had been told that by I think 2 people before but I’m not entirely sure how legit that is.

Have you ever had an out-of-body experience? yes.

Do you have more than one personality? no 

Do you prefer gory horror films or the psychological ones? psychological 

Do you have a favorite YouTuber or do you not watch much YouTube? I seldom ever watch youtube. I did watch yesterday a bunch of whose line is it anyway, but it wasn’t by any one channel in particular.

Are you a good dancer? no ahahahaha

If you could find one long-lost friend of the past, who would it be? probably chris? 

Was your sixth grade teacher a man or a woman? mom

Have you ever had any teeth pulled? ummmm when I was getting my braces put on my daggum orthodontist pulled a baby tooth without telling me first. that was not fun. also I’ve had my brother pull my teeth out. beyond that, no.

Do you wash your hair or your body first when taking a shower? I typically do hair then body.

Have you ever been to a nursing home? yes many times

Have you ever lived in a house that has been broken into? so one time when I was home alone in HS a guy-friend broke into my house and watched me sleep. that was effing creepy. umm one time someone broke into our shed. beyond that, no.

Is there someone in your life you don’t want in it? i mean there are people dating people that I dislike, but i just seldom interact with them.

How many different people of the opposite sex have you cried over? I think 4. One from assault, one from abuse, two from heart break.

Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with? i’d imagine mom.

Has anyone ever told you they were in love with you? yes.

Pretending to “never get the text” from someone who annoys you. Is that you? ehhhh sometimes yes

If your ex came up to you and asked you to take them back, what would you say? depends on who the ex is. if it’s Kile, I’d ... well I don’t know that I should type that. if it was my other exes I can only think of one I’d be curious about but truth-be-told, i don’t think so.

Do you enjoy watching cooking shows? I never got into that. 

Do you worry about gaining weight? yea I’m just over it.

Have you ever seen the movie A Walk to Remember? Cliche or worth watching? yes that was so popular in hs

What’s one event your town has that you don’t like to participate in? none come to mind 

Are any of your siblings married?  2/3 are married.

Do you like being home alone or does it freak you out? goodness I love it. it never ever happens. I would love to have my own apartment but that’ll be some time for now. 

Did you lose friends when you started dating someone? no. I always maintained all my friendships.

Did you leave milk and cookies for Santa when you were little? not that I can recall. if I did it would have been before age 5 so I don’t quite recall.

To who did you last give the finger to? I don’t.

Do you talk in your sleep? Nope. 

Do you have a good relationship with your parents? I have a great relationship with mom. I do not talk to my dad.

Have you ever been a featured member on any website? uhhhhhhh a work website yes and on a wedding website my friends made (i introduced them)

Do you feel that your previous relationships were a waste of time? I mean I don’t know that I’d go that far. I think they taught me lessons.

Do you prefer hot chocolate with or without marshmallows? i’m neutral either way

Which do you like better: Regular cakes or cookie cakes? I love both but can have neither lol

Have you ever been hit by the opposite sex? yes. 

If your significant other cheated on you, would you take them back? cheating just plain sucks. it sucks so bad.

What was the last song you listened to? something Christmas-y i think. I’m so ready for that season.

[coldcomputersoul]

Marco vs. the Forces of Love Episode 9: Do I Wanna Know?

Summary: It’s a hoot and a holler when Star helps Marco to hide from Tom by taking him to her secret place. Meanwhile, Hekapoo’s job at the Magic High Commision gets complicated.

Star vs. the Forces of Evil belongs to:

© Daron Nefcy

© Disney Television Animation

[theme song]

ACT I

[The episode starts with Mrs. Diaz going upstairs to Marco’s room]

Mrs. Díaz:

[opening the door] Oh Marco: It’s time to wake up, as you know that early to bed and early to rise makes a dude healthy and...

[She sees Marco and the girls sleeping together in the same bed and gets shocked]

Marco:

[yawning] Mom, don’t you think it’s a little too early for… [he realizes that his mother caught him] Oh, crap… Alright, listen mom: It’s not what it looks like, I-I-I can explain it to you...

[Mrs. Diaz is too shocked to listen to her son so she stands still at the door completely silent]

Star:

[waking up] Marco, what’s all that noise? don’t you see I’m trying to… [she also realizes that they were caught] sleep… oh boy...

[In that moment, the rest of the girls wake up]

Jackie:

[yawning] Good morning guys, did you have a good sleep? because I… [she becomes aware of the situation] Oh… Uhm, good morning Mrs. D you… you have a lovely home I must say he-he…

Janna:

Well, this is awkward...

Hekapoo:

Yeah, perhaps we should have thought this through before…

[Mr. Diaz enters the room to see what’s going on]

Mr. Díaz:

Honey, what’s taking you so long? the breakfast is ready and… [he notices Marco and the girls] Oh no… [he tries to get a reaction from his wife] Honey? Are you okay? please talk to me...

Marco:

Dad, you don’t understand… There’s this demon guy that...

Mr. Díaz:

[holding his wife’s hand] Marco, please… we’re on the middle of a crisis here...

Marco:

But Dad, I’m just trying to explain...

Mr. Díaz:

Don’t… say another word please. We can discuss this later in therapy.

Marco:

But this is not my fault, I...

Mr. Díaz:

Marco!!! PLEASE... don’t insist. This is not the right time, okay? [grabs his wife’s arm] come on Angie, I’ll make you an iced tea...

[Mr. Diaz takes his wife downstairs. Marco hides his face under a pillow and lies down on the bed]

Marco:

[sigh] Great job Marco Diaz. You’ve really done it this time. Now we’re gonna have to go to therapy… again...

Star:

Marco, I don’t really know what to say. I think I speak for everyone when I say: We’re SO sorry...

Marco:

No no no, don’t apologize Star. None of this is your fault. I’m the one who let all this to happen and… I guess now I’m gonna have to live with it...

Jackie:

Listen Marco, if there’s anything we can do to help you, don’t be afraid to tell us.

Marco:

That’s a very nice gesture Jackie, but… this is something I gotta make it on my own.

Jackie:

Oh, don’t worry, we understand perfectly. Right girls?

Star:

Uhm, sure...

Janna:

Yeah, no problem.

Hekapoo:

After all, we don’t wanna get in the way between you and your personal problems...

Marco:

[looking down] Thank you for understanding...

[The girls get worried about Marco and try to cheer him up]

Hekapoo:

Hey, I’ve got an idea: Next time we can make the sleepover on my dimension.

Jackie:

Great idea Hekapoo, it will be the perfect opportunity for us to… know each other a little bit better. What do you think Marco?

Marco:

[uninterested] Yeah, whatever you say...

Star:

[grabbing Marco’s shoulder] Then it’s settled: Next time we’ll have a sleepover at Hekapoo’s house. I can’t wait for it...

Janna:

Oh, this is gonna be fun.

Marco:

[uninterested] Yeah sure...

[Cut to Marco walking to school with his hands on his pockets followed by Star, Jackie, Janna and Hekapoo. Star tries to break the ice and starts a conversation]

Star:

You know, last night I had this really strange dream where we were remembering things while commenting on them like some kind of recap...

Jackie:

No way: I had the exact same dream.

Janna:

I remember that Star got angry because we made some jokes at her expense...

Hekapoo:

...that was when you told us about that time you and and Star went to buy some drinks at the store...

Jackie:

...and Star got distracted with the fluorescent lights. Yeah I remember that too.

Star:

[sigh] Would you please cut it out? I know that I get easily distracted, you don’t have to shove it on my face every single time, sheesh...

Jackie:

Star, relax. We’re not judging you in any way...

Janna:

Yeah, don’t get so serious about it.

Hekapoo:

Nonetheless: Don’t you think it’s a bit weird that we all had the exact same dream at the exact same time?

Star:

Indeed, that’s something you don’t see every day. What do you think Marco? 

Marco:

I don’t know. I’m feeling way too overwhelmed to come up with an answer... 

Jackie:

Okay Marco, we all know that you’re not in the best mood right now, but come on, lighten up. 

Janna:

I agree with Jackie: stop being so grumpy. Do you think you’re the first guy who got caught by their parents doing something embarrassing? don’t be silly...

Marco:

[sigh] It’s not that I don’t appreciate your efforts to cheer me up, but right now I feel like I have all this weight over my shoulders between Tom, my parents… I just can’t take it anymore...

Jackie:

[holding Marco’s hand] But Marco: That’s where you’re getting it wrong. You’re trying to deal with all these problems all by yourself. We want to help you, but we can’t do anything if you keep pushing us away. Am I right girls?

Janna:

Indeed...

Hekapoo:

Absolutely...

Star:

I couldn’t said it better myself... 

Jackie:

You see Marco? We understand how hard it must have been for you to adapt to all these changes, but don’t forget that you’re not alone. [she kisses Marco on the cheek] Now come on, let me see that smile...

[Marco smiles as he sees Jackie’s calm expression]

Marco:

Thanks Jackie: You always know how to make me feel better...

Jackie:

It’s what I do... [winks at him]

Star:

AND... [grabs Marco’s arm] don’t forget that you also have me to cheer you up...

Janna:

And I’ve got your back whenever you want... 

Hekapoo:

If there’s anything you need, just give me call and I’ll be there for you...

[unbeknownst to Marco and the girls, Ludo is watching them hidden behind a bush]

Marco:

Girls, girls, It’s fine. I know you’re trying to help me, but I don’t want you to sacrifice your personal lives just for me. For example: Hekapoo, you have your job at the Magic High Commission.

Hekapoo:

Oh, don’t worry about that. I’ve already asked someone to cover my shift.

Marco:

[raising an eyebrow] You do?

Hekapoo:

Of course I do you silly human. I’m always prepared for situations like this.

Marco:

I’m glad to hear that, because I wouldn’t like to get in the way between your job and...

[Before he can finish that sentence, Hekapo’s phone starts beeping]

Hekapoo:

Excuse me Marco, but I’ve gotta take this...

Marco:

Uhm, sure… no problem.

[Hekapoo picks up the phone and answers it]

Hekapoo:

What is it Rhombulus? [gibberish sounds] You what?!!! [gibberish sounds] And what the hell are you doing there in the first place?!!! That’s not your job... [gibberish sounds] Yeah, I know that today is the deadline, but I specifically told you that I would take care of it… [gibberish sounds] Well, I don’t care if it was the Pixie Empress who asked you to advance the delivery date. She perfectly knows that right now we’re on the middle of a crisis and we have our hands tied… [gibberish sounds] Alright, alright, stop being such a crybaby. I’ll be there in a minute just… hold on right there, okay? [gibberish sounds] Relax, I’m not gonna report you… for now. [hangs up the phone]

Marco:

Is everything okay?

Hekapoo:

[sigh] Yeah, it’s okay. Rhombulus just made a big mess that I’m gonna have to fix. What else is new?

Marco:

Is there anything I can do to help you, or...

Hekapoo:

No, no, no, don’t bother Marco. I know exactly what to do, but I have to go right now… [she opens a portal]

Marco:

Well, in that case, good luck with that.

Hekapoo:

Thanks... [kisses Marco on the cheek] oh, and before I go… [she sends a photo using her phone] now, check out your phone...

[Marco checks his phone and sees a picture of Hekapoo lying on her bed wearing black lingerie, which makes him blush. This also somehow annoys Star]

Marco:

Uhhhhhh...

Hekapoo:

You can thank me later for that one. [winks at him] See ya...

[She enters the portal and leaves. Meanwhile, Janna takes Marco’s phone while he’s distracted]

Janna:

Let me see that...

Marco:

Janna!!!

Janna:

[watching the picture] Wow, talking about the right angle. I don’t think those legs can spread even further, right Marco?

Marco:

[taking the phone back] Give me that.

Jackie:

Uhm, I don’t want to interrupt you guys, but… We’re gonna be late for school.

Marco:

You’re right. Come on girls, let’s go.

Janna:

Whatever you say loverboy.

[Cut to Ludo watching Marco and the girls walking away]

Ludo:

Finally, this is the opportunity I’ve been waiting for… now it’s time to...

[He sees a dog growling at him]

Ludo:

Hey, calm down buddy. I don’t want no trouble with...

[The dog starts barking as he comes out from his hiding spot]

Ludo:

Okay, you asked for it: LEVITATO!!!

[Ludo uses his magic powers to make the dog float like a balloon]

Ludo:

Ugh, I hate the creatures from this dimension. Now, where was I? Oh yeah, [ehem] now it’s time to put my plan... [close up of Ludo’s eyes] into action.

[Cut to Marco and the girls walking in the school hallways. Star watches for danger at every corner while the rest of them just stare at her]

Marco:

Uhm Star, can I talk to you for a moment?

Star:

Not now Marco, I need to be sure we’re in a safe spot.

Marco:

Yeah, I get it. What I’m trying to say is that you could be just a little bit more subtle.

Star:

No problem Marco. Subtle is my middle name...

Janna:

Really?

Star:

Nope.

Marco:

The thing is: There’s no need for you to act like a full time bodyguard just because Tom is now after me. If something strange happens, we can contact each other by phone. Simple as that.

Star:

But Marco, don’t you get it? At this point, he must already intervened our phone lines. The only thing we can do to guarantee your safety is to remain as close as possible.

Marco:

Okay fair enough, but what if someone starts to suspect that we...

Star:

LOOK OUT!!!

[Star, Jackie and Janna hug Marco at the same time]

Jackie:

What did you see?

Star:

Oh, nevermind. It’s just a moth flying around. My bad.

Marco:

Uhm, Girls?

Star, Jackie & Janna:

Yes Marco?

Marco:

Would you be so kind to let me go? remember: [whispering] We’re in a public place.

Star:

[changing her face expression] Ohhhhhh…

Marco:

Yeah, you got the idea. Now hurry up before someone finds out that...

Brittney:

[o.s] In the name of all that’s good and decent, what are you guys doing?!!!

[The camera shows that Brittney is watching them with her arms crossed. Soon, the rest of the students are watching them as well]

Marco:

[deadpan] Aaaand... my social life is finally over.

Brittney:

Ugh, please tell me you’re not doing what I think you’re doing.

Janna:

It depends: What do you think we’re doing?

Brittney:

It looks like you’re about to make out in front of everyone. Disgusting.

Marco:

Brittney, this is all a huge misunderstanding...

Star:

Yeah, we were just protecting Marco from my evil ex-boyfriend who wants to... kidnap him, or something like that...

Brittney:

[sarcastic tone] That’s a nice story. Very believable.

Star:

[whispering] We’re in luck Marco. She totally bought it.

Marco:

[deadpan] She’s being sarcastic Star...

Star:

Really? Aw man...

[The girls let Marco go while more students gather around them]

Brittney:

People: THIS is the kind of behaviour that’s getting our country right in the gutter. You should be ashamed of yourselves.

Janna:

Uhm excuse me, but have you ever heard about this little thing called “free love”? You judgemental prick...

Brittney:

Ugh, now you sound like a filthy hippie. That’s the kind of nonsense I would expect from someone like Jackie, but I thought you were smarter than that.

[Meanwhile, everyone around talks about the situation while Marco stares at the floor, embarrassed. In that moment, Ferguson and Alfonzo show up]

Ferguson:

What’s going on here?

Brittney:

What’s going on? I’ll tell you what’s going on: Your perverted friend right here is having a four way with Star, Jackie and Janna like it’s no big deal.

Ferguson:

[to Marco] YOU WHAT?!!!

Marco:

Ehem, before jumping into conclusions, I wanna make absolutely clear that none of this was my idea.

Brittney:

Knock it off Marco, not even my senile grandma would believe that.

Jackie:

[stepping up] He’s telling the truth Brittney. I was the one who allowed this to happen. [everyone gasps in surprise] If you have to blame anyone, that should be me.

Marco:

Jackie...

Jackie:

Don’t worry Marco, I got your back.

Ferguson:

[to Marco] Wow, wow, wow, slow down. Let me get this straight: You’re dating THREE girls at the same time… and they’re all okay with it?!!!

Marco:

Uhm, dating it’s not the term I would use, but...

Janna:

Actually: We’re four.

Ferguson & Alfonzo:

FOUR?!!!

Janna:

Yep. Unfortunately, she’s too busy with her work to be right here, but… here’s a picture of her.

[She takes Marco’s cell phone from his pocket and shows the photo to Alfonzo and Ferguson]

Ferguson:

Holy guacamole… she’s SO hot!!!

Alfonzo:

She’s like an RPG character, but in real life.

Janna:

I know right? and that’s not even the half of it.

Marco:

Janna, what are you doing?!!! You’re gonna get me into more trouble.

Janna:

Trust me, I know what I’m doing. [winks at him] 

Brittney:

I just can’t believe what I’m hearing right now. You’re actually encouraging this kind of behaviour?!!! You all make me sick to my stomach.

Janna:

And what exactly makes you so high and mighty? I mean, it’s not like someone is forcing us to be in this relationship. You’re just too closed-minded to understand our love.

Brittney:

But it’s unnatural!!!

Janna:

Is it Brittney? Or maybe you and your outdated viewpoints can’t accept the fact that we chose an alternative lifestyle so you want to shut us down. Yeah, real mature...

Brittney:

Don’t try to make me look like the bad guy Janna, it’s not gonna work this time. Everyone knows that I’m 100% right.

Janna:

Well, in that case: [close up to Janna’s face] Let’s ask what everyone think about this...

[The camera makes a long shot of the crowd before cutting to black]

ACT II

Brittney:

[crossing her arms] You gotta be kidding me...

Janna:

What’s the matter Brittney? Are you afraid to debate me?

Brittney:

Give me a break... No one with half a brain would support your crazy ideas. Just give up, you’re just wasting your time.

Janna:

Pfft, what a wuss. You just don’t want to debate because you know you’re gonna lose.

Brittney:

Ugh, there’s NOTHING to debate about!!! What you’re doing is disgusting and that’s it. End of story.

[Everyone around start talking while Brittney stares at Janna]

Star:

[to Janna] Okay, this is getting out of control, maybe it’s time to go to plan B.

Marco:

Plan B?!!! There’s no such thing as Plan B, don’t you get it? it’s all over. 

Janna:

[getting nervous] Marco, what did I just tell you? Let me handle this.

Brittney:

Yeah, perhaps you should listen to Marco and accept defeat Janna. You’re making a fool of yourself.

Janna:

What, because I stand up for friends? When was the last time you did something nice for someone other than yourself? or for that matter: When was the last time you did something for this school? and don’t start with the “my daddy makes donations” routine. That doesn’t count.

[The crowd is now talking about Brittney]

Brittney:

Well… I’m the cheerleading captain. I’m responsible to lead our team to victory.

Janna:

Oh sure, because that “booty shaking” strategy from last year was soooo effective.

Brittney:

And what’s your point?

Janna:

My point is: You should leave us alone and mind your own business.

[The crowd start taking again, so Janna decides to confront them]

Janna:

And as for all of you: How could you be so ungrateful to even consider to condemn Marco after all the things he has done for us? If it weren’t for him we wouldn’t beat Silver Hill’s swimming record at the presidential fitness test. The least you can do is to give him the benefit of the doubt.

[The crowd quickly agree with Janna’s point which makes Brittney upset]

Janna:

Besides, who wouldn’t want to date a guy like Marco? I mean, think about it: He’s kind, intelligent, athletic, not to mention very handsome too. What’s not to love?

Star:

Don’t forget he’s an excellent cook as well.

Jackie:

And knows karate...

[The crowd once again agree with Janna and the girls]

Janna:

Also… [seductive tone] that’s not the only good thing about Marco.

Sabrina:

[approaching Janna] What do you mean?

Janna:

Well, if you really wanna know...

[Janna whispers in Sabrina’s ear and she just gasps in shock]

Sabrina:

NO… WAY...

Janna:

Oh yeah, it’s true. [winks at her]

Marco:

Wait a minute: What did you tell her?

Sabrina:

Do you mind if I post what you told me on social media?

Janna:

Be my guest.

Marco:

Janna!!!

[Sabrina uses her phone to post a message on the internet. Then all the girls check out her phones and react to it]

Hope:

Oh my...

Leah:

This is just too good to be true...

Chelsea:

I know right?

StarFan13:

Marco is SO hot...

Ingrid:

[speaking in russian] I would love to be her bride.

Linda:

What a pro...

Chantal:

And does he really can last for THREE hours straight? 

Janna:

That’s not even the half of it.

Raya:

Is it true that he also has a huge…? uhm, you know...

Janna:

Now, that’s a very personal question… but the answer is yes.

[All the girls (except for Brittney) gather around Marco]

StarFan13:

Hey Marco, can I watch you and Star making out?

Leah:

You know, I’ve always kinda liked you...

Hope:

Do you think we can go out on a date one of these days? If you don’t mind of course...

Chantal:

Here’s my phone number. Just in case you wanna have a good time... [winks at him]

Sabrina:

I wanna know what it’s like to to be with Marco... 

[Alfonzo and Ferguson also gather around to talk with Marco]

Ferguson:

Dude, you gotta tell us your secret.

Alfonzo:

Yeah, what can we do to get chicks? please tell us...

Marco:

Guys, guys, please… I know you want me to help you to improve your romantic life, but to be honest: I’m just as clueless as you are.

[Meanwhile, Brittney gets mad as she watches all the girls flirting with Marco]

Brittney:

Well, I don’t care how allegedly good you are in bed, or how allegedly huge your… thing is… You’re still a loser to me Marco Diaz...

[beat]

Janna:

[smiling] Mmmm, Sure… [air quotes] “Allegedly”

[Star, Jackie and Janna laugh at Brittney’s comment. Soon everyone else starts laughing too which annoys Brittney]

Marco:

[thinking to himself] This day just keeps getting weirder and weirder...

[Cut to Marco and the girls having a picnic at the park]

Janna:

...and then she said: “you’re still a loser to me Marco Diaz”, that’s when everybody just laughed at her. I’ll never forget the look on her face, so funny...

Hekapoo:

Wow, that Brittney sounds like a total jerk...

Janna:

Yeah, but to be fair: it’s not her fault to be like that. When you’re rich and powerful you can become a jerk without even noticing. Right Star?

Star:

Tell me about it. I don’t wanna sound rude or anything, but there are certain people at my family’s inner circle that I just can’t stand because they’re SO obnoxious.

Marco:

I think you went WAY too far this time Janna...

Janna:

What are you talking about?

Marco:

You know, thanks to you, everyone thinks that I’m womanizer. Now I’ll have to live with that label for the rest of my life...

Janna:

That may be true, but look at the bright side: Now you have a group of female admirers. Isn’t that the dream of every teenage boy?

Marco:

But it’s already difficult for me to take care of all of you, and don’t get me wrong: I think you’re all wonderful, but… [sigh] I’m so exhausted. Perhaps it’s time to settle things right and take a decision.

Jackie:

That’s... very manly on your part. I hope you the best on your choice.

Hekapoo:

And just to be perfectly clear: Whatever decision you make, you’ll have my total support.

Janna:

Really? Too bad, cause I was starting to enjoy this, but it’s your decision so I won’t get in the way.

Star:

Neither do I, after all we’re still gonna be friends, right?

Jackie:

Sure...

Janna:

Of course...

Hekapoo:

Absolutely...

[awkward silence]

Marco:

Okay, no more beating around the bush, it’s time to decide: Uhm… I choose...

[In that moment, Hekapoo’s phone starts beeping]

Hekapoo:

[sigh] Can you hold on just a moment? [answers the phone] What do you want this time? [gibberish sounds] The royal library? [gibberish sounds] Yeah… [gibberish sounds] Oh, and the bookshelves just fell down without any explanation, right… [gibberish sounds] Do you have any idea how long it’s gonna take to restore the whole place? [gibberish sounds] Even if you use magic, it would take at least FOUR months of work to put it all back together… [gibberish sounds] Are you crazy? that’s not even in the budget!!! [gibberish sounds] And where the hell are we supposed to get a loan for that you moron? Don’t you think the current debt we’re holding is already bad enough?!!! [gibberish sounds] Look, just stay right there and don’t do anything. I’ll fix the problem all by myself... [gibberish sounds] That condescending tone it’s not gonna work this time. We’re gonna talk about this on our next meeting… [gibberish sounds] Look, I’m just gonna hang up, this is getting ridiculous... [hangs up the phone] I’m sorry Marco, but I have to...

Marco:

No, no, no, it’s okay. You don’t have to apologize for doing your job.

Hekapoo:

I know, but I just can’t help but feeling guilty for making you delay your decision.

Marco:

Don’t worry about that. I can... wait a little bit longer.

Hekapoo:

You’re so considerate. Let me give you a quick kiss...

[Just when she’s about to kiss Marco. Hekapoo’s phone starts beeping again]

Hekapoo:

[groaning loudly] That IDIOT!!! Sorry, but I have to go right now...

[She opens a portal and quickly leaves]

Marco:

Poor Hekapoo. Her work at the Magic High Commision must be so hard.

Jackie:

And did you notice how stressed she looked? 

Janna:

Indeed, she was like a ticking time bomb ready to explode.

Star:

That’s pretty bad, but… I’m pretty sure she can handle it. I mean, come on: She’s been doing this for more than 700 years.

Marco:

I guess you’re right.

Star:

Besides, we have to take care of other problems, like: What are we gonna do with Marco’s parents?

Marco:

Oh right. I completely forgot about my parents.

Jackie:

So, what are you gonna do?

Marco:

Well, one thing’s for sure: I can’t go back to my house right now. It would be so awkward to be face to face with them. Can I stay with one of you just for a week?

Janna:

Sorry Marco, but I can’t invite you to my place. It’s being fumigated. Also, we’re staying at my grandparents house and… let’s just say they don’t take too kindly the visit from strangers. 

Jackie:

No problem: you can stay at my place as long as you want. I’ll let you use the guest room.

Marco:

Oh thank you, thank you Jackie. It means a lot to me...

Star:

WAIT, YOU CAN’T!!!

[Everyone pays attention to Star and she immediately calms down]

Star:

I-I Mean… I know the perfect place where you can hide, so it would better for you to… stay with me...

Marco:

Are you sure about that? How are we gonna explain to your parents what’s going on?

Star:

That’s the thing: I’m not gonna take you to the castle. I’m talking about my secret hideout.

Marco:

Wait… this whole time you had a secret hideout?

Star:

Well duh, every princess in royal training have one. What are you ten years old?

Janna:

Did anybody else besides you knows about your secret place?

Star:

Well, there’s Princess Pony Head, but I swear: Absolutely no one else knows about it. Not even Tom.

Marco:

I don’t know Star. I appreciate what you’re trying to do but... I just don’t trust in princess Pony Head. I better stay at Jackie’s place.

Star:

B-But Marco, what about your personal safety? Like… right now, you’re being chased by Tom and… don’t you think it would be better if you stay with someone who knows how to use magic? just in case he finds out where you are.

Marco:

Mmmm… that makes a lot sense.

Star:

Yeah, and don’t get me wrong: I have nothing against you staying with Jackie, it’s just that she’s a bit… mmmm… how can I say it without being rude?

Janna:

Useless?

Star:

Yeah, that’s it. Jackie is useless for this situation. I’m sorry Jackie, but this is a magic emergency and...  I don’t think you could handle it properly.

Jackie:

[awkward expression] Uhm, sure none taken. I can... see your point.

Star:

Oh, I’m so glad that you understand. You know that in any other situation I would let you have Marco, I-I-I mean… take him to your place.

Jackie:

Yeah, don’t sweat it.

Star:

Great, [grabs Marco’s arm] come on Marco, I can’t wait to show you my room... 

Marco:

But wait, I have to go for my toothbrush.

Star:

Don’t worry, you can borrow mine.

Marco:

That doesn’t sound very hygienic...

[Star uses Marco’s scissors to open a portal]

Star:

Well, I guess we’ll see you on another time. Bye.

Marco:

Take care...

[Jackie and Janna watch Marco and Star leave through the portal]

Jackie:

[looking concerned] You don’t really think I’m useless, do you?

Janna:

[sigh] Look, if you think what I said was too harsh, I apologize, it wasn’t my intention, but...

Jackie:

But...?

Janna:

Star actually made a fair point. Right now Marco’s life is on the line and as much as I hate to admit it, she’s the only one who can protect him from that deranged demon dude...

Jackie:

I can understand that, it’s just that… I feel so powerless right now because I can’t do anything to help Marco. I wish I could be like Star.

Janna:

I know how you feel, and believe me: I would do anything to help Marco to overcome this problem, but in the end, we’re just a couple of average girls. The only thing we can do is give him our support. 

Jackie:

Yeah, you’re right. I guess I’m gonna have to learn to live with it.

Janna:

Well, in that case: welcome to the club. [gives her a pat on the back]

Jackie:

Thanks Janna.

Janna:

You’re welcome, and now if you excuse me: I have to go home before my parents ground me for being 5 minutes after curfew. See ya...

[Janna gets on her bike and leaves. Jackie just stares at the ground looking disappointed. Cut to Marco and Star arriving at some isolated place in the middle of nowhere]

Marco:

Okay, where are we now?

Star:

Outside the limits of Mewni. This part of the country is so isolated that you can’t even find it on the maps, isn’t that great? 

Marco:

I guess, but I can’t see anything. Are you sure we’re in the right place? 

Star:

Marco: I was born and raised on this dimension. I know exactly what I’m doing, okay? Now, follow me. I’ll take you to my secret place.

[Marco follows Star who just keeps walking in straight line for two hours]

Marco:

How long till we get there?

Star:

[looking at a rock] That’s odd. I don’t remember that rock. Maybe we should have go northwest...

Marco:

WHAT?!!! You mean we’re lost?!!!

Star:

Marco, don’t be silly. We’re not lost. I just need to remember we are we supposed to go.

Marco:

Well, now that’s just great. We’re in the middle of nowhere without any direction whatsoever. I’ll just use the scissors to get us out of here...

Star:

Wait, now I remember: We were supposed to go east. That’s why I can’t recognize any of this... 

Marco:

Oh, so now it turns out that we were walking in the opposite direction this whole time.

Star:

I know… crazy, isn’t it?

Marco:

[sigh] Now we’re never gonna make it before sundown.

Star:

Hey, what’s with that pessimistic attitude? Don’t worry Marco, I’ll get us out of here in no time...

[Star uses her wand to summon cloudy]

Star:

Ta-Da...

Marco:

[deadpan] And you didn’t summon cloudy 2 hours ago because...

Star:

[changing her expression] Oh… Maybe I should’ve thought of that before.

Marco:

[deadpan] Yep, you definitely should.

[Cut to Marco and Star arriving at a small grey tower in the middle of nowhere]

Star:

...and we’re finally here. Marco, I present to you: My secret spot. What do you think?

Marco:

It looks kinda dull, and don’t get me wrong, it’s not bad, but… It just doesn’t resemble anything from Mewni.

Star:

That’s the idea. I mean, who would imagine that this seemingly abandoned tower actually belongs to the princess of Mewni?

Marco:

That makes sense.

Star:

Yeah, and if that’s not enough. The tower uses a special magic force field that makes it look like it’s abandoned, but if you use the right spell… [raises her wand] DIAMOND IN THE ROUGH!!!

[The force field disappears and the tower becomes bright and colorful]

Marco:

[impressed] Wow, it’s beautiful.

Star:

Thanks. I made the decorations all by myself. Follow me this way...

[Marco follows Star inside the tower. Cut to Marco and Star walking through the darkness]

Star:

[clapping her hands] Lights on...

[The tower magically illuminates while the camera pans the entire room. There’s a king-sized poster of Love Sentence hanging on the wall, a jukebox full of Love Sentence bootlegs, a giant TV screen with microphones to sing karaoke, a photo booth and a lot of games]

Marco:

This place is so… AWESOME!!! So many games and there’s a karaoke and… look at this thing [pointing at the jukebox] just when I thought I would never see one of these again in my life. The only thing this place needs to be perfect is… [the camera shows a Love Sentence themed arcade] THE LOVE SENTENCE ARCADE GAME: AWESOME FEELING?!!! but only 5 of these were made and most of them are in Japan.

Star:

Let’s just say I have my contacts.

Marco:

[with hearts on his eyes] Star, I can’t feel my legs.

Star:

Oh, too bad. Because I was about to invite you to LOVE SENTENCE’S NEXT CONCERT!!!

[Star pulls three tickets to see Love Sentence out of her pocket]

Star:

Can you spell: Front row seats?

Marco:

Star: You’re the best.

Star:

I know. But enough about me... let’s get busy.

Marco:

Are you thinking what I’m thinking?

Star:

I guess so...

Marco & Star:

It’s KARAOKE TIME!!!

MONTAGE:

-Marco and Star sing karaoke songs while dancing to the music.

-Marco and Star play twister. Marco loses the game, but they laugh about it anyway.

-Marco and Star play in the arcade. Star asks for one more chance after losing twice in a row.

-Marco and Star have a pillow fight using Love Sentence themed pillows.

-Marco and Star have fun in the photo booth while cosplaying as the members of Love Sentence.

-Marco and Star watch some old Love Sentence concerts while eating ice cream.

[Cut to Marco and Star rolling on the floor laughing]

Marco:

Oh man, I don’t remember the last time I had this much fun

Star:

Yeah, me neither. We really need to do this more often.

Marco:

You know, it’s been a long time since we hang out together, like… just the two of us.

Star:

Hey, you’re right, I never thought about that before, but it makes me glad that we can still have fun together like in the good old days. 

Marco:

Remember when you use your magic to freeze time because you were afraid of getting late to school? 

Star:

And we goof around for a while until I decided to gets things back to normal, but it didn’t work so we had to go to that weird time dimension? Yeah, I remember that... and how about that time you taught  me how to ride a bike, but I was keep asking you to hold my seat...  

Marco:

Yeah, and I had to chase you all the way to the highway. Yeah, how can I forget that?

Star:

We’ve been through a lot together and here we are: Having a good time together. Maybe Starco is not as platonic as I thought after all... 

Marco:

You know, that little nickname you use to refer to our thing: It’s not as clever as you think it is...

Star:

Yeah, I know...

Marco:

So, what do you wanna do now? Play some more games? Have another pillow fight? Watch another Love Sentence concert?

Star:

Nah, I think I had enough games and songs for today.

Marco:

So, what do you have in mind?

Star:

I’m glad you asked. Follow me...

[Star takes Marco upstairs to her room, which has a giant bed full of stuffed animals and more Love Sentence posters hanging on the walls]

Marco:

Well, this looks nice...

Star:

And I haven’t showed you the best part yet… [raises her wand]

Marco:

Have you considered to make your next sleepover right here. I mean, this place is big enough to have at least 20...

[Marco turns around and sees Star wearing a blue tight dress along with high heels that accentuates her figure. Marco just blushes as he watches Star getting close to him]

Star:

Yeah, that sounds good and all, but I think having a secret place is far more romantic, don’t you think Marco?

Marco:

Uhhhhhh...

Star:

Well, what are you waiting for? We both know I didn’t bring you here just to play checkers. Here, let me show you how to do it...

[Star puts her arms around Marco.. he reciprocates and gives her a passionate kiss while grabbing her waist]

ACT III

Star:

[thinking to herself] Okay Star, this is your chance. Don’t screw it up.

[Star throws Marco onto the bed and gets on top of him]

Marco:

Star, don’t you think we’re moving too fast?

Star:

What are you talking about? We’ve already done this before.

Marco:

Yeah, but… I was hoping that today I could… you know… take a time off from doing this...

Star:

But that’s exactly what we’re doing right now, or is it because... you don’t want me?

Marco:

What? No, that’s not it. Of course I want you...

Star:

Then what are we waiting for? Let’s get down to business… [she tries to kiss Marco]

Marco:

But Star...

Star:

What now?

Marco:

It’s just that… Uhm… I… [sigh] nevermind...

Star:

You know, you’re acting very strange lately, but don’t worry: I know how can I fix it. [whispers in Marco’s ear] now, pull down my zipper.

Marco:

[looking uncomfortable] Okay...

[Marco starts pulling down the zipper from Star’s dress, when suddenly...]

Hekapoo:

[o.s] Enjoying the evening your royal highness?

[Marco and Star turn their heads and see Hekapoo in front of them with her arms crossed]

Star:

[getting out of bed] Hekapoo?!!! What are you doing here? And how did you find my secret spot?

Hekapoo:

Princess, I’ve been around for more than 700 years. I know this land like the back of my hand...

Star:

And how did you manage to get through my magic force field?

Hekapoo:

Oh please. I’ve using that spell long before you were even born, but enough about that: Just what do you think you’re doing right now? 

Star:

Uhm, we’re in the middle of something here, so… why don’t you go back to mind your own business?

Hekapoo:

And let you have Marco so you can take advantage? ah-ah. No way...

Marco:

It’s alright Hekapoo. We were just about to stop anyway, so...

Star:

Well, this is a new low for you. First you kidnap Marco for 16 years, and now you’re stalking him like a complete pervert. So do yourself a favor and stop being so petty.

Hekapoo:

Mmmm… Seems like you know about being petty, considering that slim bath you gave me three weeks ago at the Bounce Lounge, your majesty... 

Marco:

Okay Hekapoo, we all know about that awful incident and we all agree that was a dumb mistake that will never happen ever again. Right Star?

Star:

I know exactly what’s going on? You’re just jealous because Marco prefers to be with me and you just wanna get in OUR way.

Marco:

Or, simply don’t listen to anything I have to say.

Hekapoo:

Jealous, huh? Seems like you know all about that...

Star:

And what is that supposed to mean?!!!

Hekapoo:

As if you don’t what I’m talking about... [shows her cleavage]

Star:

Watch your words Hekapoo. Don’t forget who are you dealing with...

[Marco watches both girls fighting over him while trying to figure out a solution]

Hekapoo:

Unbelievable. It’s like you can’t wait to become queen to boss me around all day long. You’re so petty.

Marco:

[raising his hand] Can I say something?

Star:

Well, I’m least I’m not a cocktease.

Hekapoo:

Oh yeah? Well let me tell you something princess bitter-fly: I’d rather be a cocktease, than be a  phony, cynical, spoiled daddy’s girl who treats their boyfriends like merchandise.

Star:

[raising her wand] I’ll show you merchandise...

[Marco gets in between to stop the fight]

Marco:

Okay, this is getting ridiculous. How many times do you have to tear each other apart over me? Don’t I have the right to choose?

[The girls stop fighting and stare at each other in silence]

Hekapoo:

You know what? You’re right Marco. There’s no point to start another pointless fight. Just tell us which one of us do you want to be your girlfriend.

Star:

Yeah, I agree. Come on Marco, tell this backstabbing boyfriend stealer to screw off...

Marco:

Uhm… yeah, I was about to get into that...

Hekapoo:

No, don’t do that Marco. Choose me and I’ll give you the sweet love of a woman...

Marco:

[thinking to himself] Oh boy, now I messed up big time...

Star:

Ha! You’re just wasting your time. Marco is WAY too smart to fall into that game of yours. Am I right Marco?

Marco:

Well I...

Hekapoo:

Oh, okay... so answer me this: What's with that skimpy outfit you’re wearing right now? because I don’t see any party near around this area. Do you Marco?

Marco:

Please, do not involve me into this...

Star:

Say what you want about the dress, but you can’t deny the fact that Marco loves to see me wearing it. [makes some poses for Marco] Do you like this, don’t you baby?

Hekapoo:

And then you say I’m the cocktease.

Star:

[getting angry] EXCUSE ME?!!!

[Both girls get into a heated argument while Marco puts a pillow over his face out of frustration]

Star:

You see what you did? Everything was okay until you came to ruin our fun.

Hekapoo:

Forcing someone to do things he doesn’t want it’s not exactly my idea of fun, and I’m pretty sure Marco would agree with me on that.

Star:

Oh, shut up you... Slut!!!

Hekapoo:

Brat!!!

[They aggressively stare at each other until Hekapoo’s phone starts beeping once again which makes her groan in annoyance]

Hekapoo:

[answering the phone] This better be good Rhombulus… [gibberish sounds] You what?!!!

[Her expression quickly changes from angry to concerned]

Hekapoo:

Okay, just... slow down and tell me exactly what happened… [gibberish sounds] Aha... [gibberish sounds] yeah… [gibberish sounds] and the crystal is fine, right? [gibberish sounds] You’re kidding me… [gibberish sounds] Hold on, are you telling me you’re holding the Espercrystal with your bare hands?!!! Are you crazy?!!! [gibberish sounds] No, I don’t wanna hear your excuses. You know perfectly well that you can’t mess around with that thing!!! [gibberish sounds] Okay look, I’m on my way, so keep hanging there and please, PLEASE don’t let the crystal touch the ground, otherwise the consequences would be catastrophic... [gibberish sounds] [sigh] Yeah, whatever… [hangs up the phone] Okay, I’m leaving for now, but don’t even think that this conversation is over… to be continued.

[She opens a portal and leaves]

Star:

Well, I’m glad that’s over… Now, where were we? Oh yeah, you were about to pull down my zipper...

Marco:

Uhm, Star? Don’t you think there are other things to be worried about? Like that crystal thing Hekapoo mentioned just a moment ago...

Star:

Oh, forget about that. She can handle it. Now kiss me wildman...

[Star tries to kiss Marco, but he turns down her affections]

Marco:

Stop that!!! Seriously… just… Okay, that’s it...

[Marco gets fed up with Star’s unwanted affections, so he throws her to the bed]

Star:

What’s wrong? You wanna do it with me, or not?

Marco:

Ugh, I can’t believe how shallow you’re acting right now. The whole universe as we know it might be at risk of disappearing, and the only thing you care about is to have sex with me. Keep your priorities straight...

Star:

You know, I don’t understand why are you making such a big deal out of this. I told you she can handle it. It’s her job for crying out loud.

Marco:

That’s beside the point. What I’m trying to say is that you’ve been acting strange lately, like... First, you take me to this isolated place to play games and sing karaoke, and then out of the blue you lure me into your room and force me to have sex with you. Is this your idea of fun? Am I just a joke to you?

Star:

Well, excuse for trying to give you a nice surprise. I thought boys liked this kind of approach. 

Marco:

I didn’t ask for any of this. I just wanted to spend some time with you without having to take off your clothes. You know: Like in the old days?!!!

Star:

Oh, so you’re admitting that you only want me as your friend, aren’t you?

Marco:

[sigh] That’s not what I meant. Stop putting words in my mouth!!!

Star:

[getting angry] So then what is it Marco?!!! What do I have to do to get your love?!!!

[In that moment, Star breaks into tears and turns her back on Marco]

Marco:

Star, I...

Star:

Go away!!! I don’t wanna hear another word from you...

[Marco gets worried about Star so he sits next to her to talk, but she tries to avoid eye contact]

Marco:

Star, I know that you’re mad at me and you have all the right to feel like that and all, but… I can’t help but think you’re missing the point of this relationship, you see: I don’t hang out with you because I only want to get into your pants, I hang out with you because I like you as a person, as a human being…

Star:

[sobbing] And what about the other girls?

Marco:

Although I do have feelings for them as well, the thing is: You and I have something more intimate. We’re like soulmates, “the other half” of each other. And that kind of connection goes beyond any sexual desire you can possibly imagine...

Star:

Am I that important to you?

Marco:

[grabbing her shoulder] Of course you are Star. Don’t doubt it for a second...

[Star looks at Marco’s candid expression and smiles while he wipes the tears from her face]

Star:

Thank Marco. You always know how to make me feel better.

Marco:

Hey, you don’t have to thank me. That’s what friends are for.

Star:

Yeah, about that… Can I ask you something?

Marco:

Sure, what is it?

Star:

[blushing] Have you... considered the possibility to become more than friends with me? I mean, we know each other for quite some time and... I always thought you were kinda cute...

Marco:

[blushing] Star...

Star:

[standing up] And it’s not like I wanna get in between you and... the person you’ll choose as your girlfriend, but… I want to think about my own happiness as well. That’s why I’m trying so hard to get your attention. You must think that I’m pathetic.

[Marco smiles as he watches Star opening herself to him, so he stands up and gives her a hug]

Marco:

You know I would never think of something like that. I care about you and I want you to be as happy as possible no matter what.

Star:

[blushing] I know that you do.

Marco:

And yes Star: I did consider the idea of you and I as a couple, but I was too confused and scared to make a proper decision...

Star:

Marco...

Marco:

But now that I know I can trust you, there’s no doubt in my mind anymore… I choose you.

[Tears of joy fall from Star’s eyes as she hears it]

Star:

[smiling] I’ve always dreamed about this moment ever since I met you. I promise that I will not let you down and I’ll do my best to be the best girlfriend you can possibly imagine.

Marco:

That’s all I needed to hear for now… I love you Star.

Star:

I love you too Marco.

[Marco gives Star a passionate kiss as he starts pulling down the zipper of her dress. Cut to the Magic High Commision having an emergency meeting with Queen Butterfly. Rhombulus is sitting in the corner looking at the wall as this happens]

Omnitraxus:

You wanted to see us, your majesty?

Queen Butterfly:

Yes Omnitraxus, please take a seat.

[Everyone except Rhombulus sits down on the table]

Queen Butterfly:

Okay, the first thing I want to address on this meeting is regarding our current magic crisis and how are gonna deal with it. As you know, the empress of Pixtopia recently stated her kingdom’s withdrawal from our historical trade, which will result in a massive shutdown of all our sources of interdimensional communication within the next few months. We have to come up with an alternative solution.

Omnitraxus:

I know, what about we buy tramorfidian crystals to Quest Buy in exchange of approve that safe harbor protection act to protect their business?

Hekapoo:

That’s not gonna work, I just went there last week and they told me they don’t have enough crystals to maintain the entire kingdom. Also, their staff recently unionized, so right now they’re not in position to make any big decision.

Omnitraxus:

Okay, and what about the Lucitors? Last time I checked they had plenty of magic energy we could use as a backup.

Queen Butterfly:

I thought the same thing, but our relationship with the Lucitors is very delicate since we relegate their domain to the underworld. If we ask them for a favor, we’re at risk of losing half of our territory in the best case scenario.

Rhombulus:

[raising his hand] Can I say something?

Hekapoo:

Shut up. Don’t forget you’re grounded for almost destroying the entire universe.

Rhombulus:

But it wasn’t my fault...

Queen Butterfly:

From what I see it, now we only have two choices: Either we declare state of emergency and risk to lose more approval, or we keep on relying on the Espercrystal to backup our line servers until the next magic convention which will be in 6 months.

Hekapoo:

But Queen Moon, the Espercrystal is too unstable to work with. It requires someone with a lot of experience and attention to detail to extract the right amount of power, and Rhombulus is just too clumsy to do it...

Rhombulus:

Hey...

Hekapoo:

Shut up.

Queen Butterfly:

That’s why I want YOU do it Hekapoo.

Hekapoo:

Me?!!!

Queen Butterfly:

That’s right. I know I promised you vacations from the next 2 months, but we need you right here. The fate of Mewni is in your hands.

Hekapoo:

Yeah, I understand, but what about my actual work? I told you can’t clone myself anymore.

Queen Butterfly:

I’ll hire a crew to help you with that. The thing is: You’re the most qualified person to do this. 

Hekapoo:

[sigh] I guess you’re right. I’ll do it.

Queen Butterfly:

Good, so we all agree that Hekapoo will take care of the magic crisis. In that case, the meeting is over.

Hekapoo:

[looking disappointed] Whatever, [whispering] goodbye to my free time with Marco.

Queen Butterfly:

Don’t be sad. You’re making a really important sacrifice and you’ll be compensated for this. Now, come on, let’s go to the cafeteria. Today’s lunch is on me.

Rhombulus:

Can I go too?

Hekapoo:

No, you have at least 3 more weeks of punishment left, so no lunch for you.

Rhombulus:

Oh, tartar sauce...

[Everyone except Rhombulus leave the room to have lunch. In that moment, a portal opens and Star shows up bringing a backpack with her]

Rhombulus:

What took you so long?

Star:

I had some important things to take care of, but anyway... [opens the backpack] Here’s my PS4 with all my favorite games, a music player with the entire Love Sentence discography plus B-sides and rarities, and bag full of nachos.

Rhombulus:

Thank Star. It means a lot to me and all but… I must say: The fact that you paid me to mess things up on purpose to maintain Hekapoo busy with work is... kind of a dick move. even for you.

Star:

Well, since I don’t have a dick, I don’t know what you mean by that, but thanks for your help.

Rhombulus:

You’re welcome…

MARCO VS. THE FORCES OF LOVE - EPISODE 9: DO I WANNA KNOW?

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #134

“i got detention ‘cuz i made a face; nobody believed me that it’s stuck that way.”

If you were to die today would your life be complete?  No. How good is Coca-Cola?  It's my second-favorite soda. Who was the last person you took a picture with?
  My niece Aubree <3 Do you have a bad temper? 
 No. Do you know anyone who is pregnant right now?
  One acquaintance, one old friend off the top of my head. Have you ever had someone pick you up off the ground and carry you?  Mom when I passed out. If you were in the hospital, do you think any of your exes would come see you?  Girt probably would, and he's the only one I wouldn't have a problem with visiting. If you were kicked out of your house, would the last person you texted take you in?  I'm sure they would, but it's more realistic I'd live with my dad. If you were immortal for a day, what would you do?  Skydive. What fictional place would you most like to go to?  Yo can I go to Azeroth. Who has impressed you most with what they’ve accomplished?  UHHHHHH.  I'm honestly not quite sure.  But Mark is like super high on the list, if not #1.  I'm not well-informed on a lot of people's accomplishments lajsfdaowe. What’s something you like to do the old-fashioned way?  Hmmmm.  Good question. What is one thing you really want but can’t afford?  Lmao dude I want so many expensive things atm. What is the most impressive thing you know how to do?  I almost snorted reading this question because like do you honestly expect something impressive of me.  I... guess I understand Sony Vegas well? What are some of the turning points in your life?  Uhhhh meeting my ex, the divorce, discovering my passion for photography, the breakup, re-uniting with Dad, r e c o v e r y. What’s your cure for hiccups?  NOTHING.  NOTHING WORKS. Don’t you think it’d be cool to see a colossal squid?  FUCKING NOPE THEY ARE SPAWNS OF THE NIGHTMARE REALM. What kind of steak do you prefer?  When I ate meat, I liked medium well. Has anyone ever cheated on their significant other with you?  Yes, allow me to (not) tell you about my stupid 12-year-old self. Are you fascinated by outer space?  *cue the Mark "Space is Cool" mix* Do you answer your phone when it’s a number you don’t recognize? Never. When washing your hands, do you wet your hands or put soap on first?  Put the soap on. When was the hardest you ever cried? What was the circumstance?  The night of the breakup.  I had left the house to walk to Jason's, and Mom got in the car and kept driving in front of me to stop me (I was too practically catatonic to run).  Eventually gave up, she drove me home, and when she opened the door, it was my goal to run to the kitchen and slit my throat, but the moment I made the action to run, she pretty much tackled me and I sobbed my lungs out for like 30 minutes.  Fuck that entire night. Who were your last 3 Facebook messages from and what do they say?  "lol but hey thats the world we live in lol well goodnight honey and i hope to speak to u again" from Leslie, "How quaint O:" from Girt, "Its okay :)" from Amanda. Who was the last person to comment on your Facebook status? What does the comment say?  Sara saying "YEP" when I shared a picture of straight people dating versus lesbians and it was spot-on. Which do you use the most, smiley faces, kisses or hearts?  Faces, probs. Do you like sweet or salty popcorn? Ohhhh both.  But I've gotta side with salty. Have you ever had to put your hand over someone’s mouth to keep them quiet?  Once. Have you ever fed a wild animal?  Yes. The last time you packed, where were you going?  Sara's. Do you believe in astrology?  Definitely not. Do you have an accent?  Not really, but you can pick up a southern tone with some words.  Example, my "your" sounds more like "yer," usually. Has someone ever made you a Build-A-Bear?  No. Do you sing in the shower?  I have been a tad bit lately...  I used to never. Are you satisfied with your current camera? My phone camera is SHIT, and I need a new actual camera.  55-200mm lens is broken, the other one's automatic focus setting is and I'm not great at manual focus. Have you ever been in a choir?  In Catholic church, yes. Does it bother you to have dirt on the bottom of your bare feet?  Y E S Has anyone ever told you that you have a big butt?  I literally have the flattest ass of any female you'll ever meet. Do you often skip breakfast? Pretty much daily now, yeah.  I'm fasting and don't eat until 11, so breakfast's passed. Last person who drove you somewhere (besides your parents)? Nicole. Who last grabbed your behind?  I'm sure it was Chelsea being her crazy self. Do you eat raw cookie dough?  Yeah dukes up salmonella. Do you watch Grey’s Anatomy?  No. Would you survive in prison?  No.  I would find one way or another to kill myself. Do you drink? Smoke? Do drugs? Why, or why not?  Rarely, no, no.  I drink usually in celebratory settings to loosen up some and sometimes just because I like the flavor of weak, fruity alcohol.  Smoking's gross, drugs are ew. What was the first cigarette you ever smoked?  Never smoked. Are you scared about the end of the world?  If I'mma be in it, hell yeah.  But it's not something I actively worry about because I don't think it'll happen in my lifetime. Do you prefer landmarks or street names when being given directions?  Landmarks.  I don't know street names for shit. Do you read the prologues in the beginnings of books?  Yes. Where is one place that you’d never be caught dead in?  Never be caught dead in, ever... uhhhh... nothing's coming to mind right now.  Oh wait.  Probably a strip club. Apple Jacks: yay or nay?  YAY. Do you have a favorite Scooby-Doo movie?  Yeah, but I don't remember which one. ;-;  It's that one where the girl says her name is Mary Jane and Shaggy goes, "That's, like, my favorite name."  Totally went over my head as a kid lmao. Have you ever met a guy for coffee?  No, I hate coffee anyway. Who is your pet most attached to in your family?  Teddy's most attached to me, I'm the only one who has any physical contact with Venus and she trusts me, Bentley is bonded with Mom, and Mitsu is still apprehensive of anyone. Does the last person you shared a bed with mean anything to you?  The whole world and more. What do you normally do when you’ve had a really bad day?  Cry, have a shit attitude occasionally, a nap is common, talk to Sara, binge my favorite Markiplier videos. When is the next time you will wear a dress?  Hm.  Maybe this summer if I'm confident enough in my body by then lmao. On the main page on YouTube, what’re the three recommended videos? 8-BitGaming beating SCP: Containment Breach, a DanAndPhilGAMES video of Golf With Friends, and then an 8-BitRyan vid of the full release of Raft. Do you know anyone from Canada? Yeah, my former roommate's ex. Are thongs sexy? Yeah, but oml I know I couldn't wear one. Did you grow up in a healthy environment? I wouldn't say "healthy," no.  My dad was an alcoholic at the time, parents always fought, and our neighborhood was dangerous. Heavy rain or heatwave? Heavy rain, easily.  Fuck the heat. You have a choice to shoot your father or die, what would you do?  I hate these damn questions, but I'd rather die.  My father deserves the longest and happiest life possible without the betrayal of his daughter. If killing yourself meant saving the world, would you?  Yeah.  It's a lose-lose situation for me; if I didn't, I'd still die if the world's gonna end. Who knows your most darkest memory or secret?  Jason and Mom should know, and whoever read those specific surveys. Who was the last person you almost went out with?  Meh.  Juan.  We talked and hung out once in... late 2016 I think and I was pretty confused as to how I felt about him.  Meanwhile, he hasn't kept it a secret in the least he's liked me since freshman year.  He's always treated me like a gentleman should, but I know the dark and disgusting parts of him.  Glad I decided against it. The Rolling Stones, Led Zeppelin, or The Beatles?  Stones. What does your grandma call you?  Just my name. And what do you call your grandmother?  Grammy. Would you rather have a pool or a hot tub?  Pool. Do you think ‘everything bagels’ are disgusting?  No, but I have to be in the mood for one. Do you find serial killers fascinating?  I wouldn't call them as a whole fascinating, but what has to be going on in their brains to create such grotesque desires and creativities. Do you have high blood pressure?  No. Have you ever pumped gas?  No.  I'm 22 btw lmao. Have your parents ever caught you drinking?  I mean Mom's seen me with a drink when she didn't know I'd gotten one, but I wouldn't call it "caught" since I'm allowed to and I made no effort to make it secretive. Do you prefer writing by hand or typing? Typing.  Writing makes my carpal tunnel act up quickly, and besides, typing's way faster. Think of one of the biggest decisions you've had to make in your life. If you made a different choice, how different would your life be now?  Panicking and telling Mom when I overdosed.  I took way more than what I should've taken of a cold medicine I can't even look at now, but I don't think it would've killed me based on how I felt, but then again, the fluids or whatever I got to purge it could've saved me; however, I feel like I would've killed myself through another method if I didn't tell her.  It all led to the psychiatric care I needed. Have you ever taken a course on CPR?  No, but I should. Do you wear a watch? No, I don't even own one. When are you at your most energetic? A little after waking up.  Just gotta get over the initial drowsiness. Do you like playing cards? If so, what's your favorite game?  I don't really enjoy card games.  I liked Magic: The Gathering tho when I was with Jason, but I wasn't that good at it considering it's got like a billion rules.  I'd still play with someone who knew how to, though.  I loooove the PS3 version that was made for it, it was much easier and I found it relaxing.  And I adore the artwork like jfc. What are your parents’ natural hair colors? What is yours?  Extremely dark brown, black, dirty blonde but turned to brown. How do you react to random strangers suddenly trying to make conversation with you?  I get nervous. Do you like Slim Jims?  YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAS MAMA. Have you ever been in a castle? The Disney World castle, if that counts? Would you rather write a mystery or love story? A love story. Are you afraid of getting shots?  No.  I don't like them, but. What do you currently hear?  "Pour Some Sugar On Me" cover by Ninja Sex Party. What’s one text that you saved?  Two texts from Sara that I love way too much. Have you ever cut your own hair?  No. What’s your favorite color combination? Probably orange and black bc Halloween. Did you share a locker at school? No. Have you ever sang karaoke?  No. How old were you when you went on your first date?  Huh, I dunno.  Just the guy and myself?  Probably dinner with Jason at 16? Has anyone besides your family seen you naked? Yeah. Would you rather have strep throat or an ear infection?  Holy fuck, after my last ear infection?  Strep. Where was your first job?  GameStop. Have you ever been to a night club? No. Do all good things really come to an end?  No, not all. How many people do you trust with your life?  Three. Are you too kind for your own good?  Don't think so. Have you ever held a baby? Yeah. What's your favorite '90s TV show?  The Nanny. What are you favorite book series? Warriors. Favorite superheroes?  I know he's technically an anti-hero, but does Deadpool still count?  If not, uh.  Batman I guess. Would people consider you more immature or mature? Mature, probably. Would you say most of your friends are older or younger than you?  Younger. If you have a significant other, do you get jealous of people a lot? She knows I was insecure as fuck in the beginning.  Now, nope. Who was your best friend in the fifth grade?  Ummm I think Quiata? Do your parents still help you financially?  I don't have a job.  So. Have either of your parents ever been in trouble with the law? Don't think so. Do you have a preferred brand of bottled water?  Essentia.  Thanks for not having it, NC. Are you more prone to overthinking things, or being too impulsive?  Hunny I overthink if I have to pee or not if it's not a massive need. How bad are your worst cramps on a scale of 1-10? Eh, maybe just a seven thanks to the pill. Have you ever thrown up from cramps?  No. List three people you had a hard time forgiving.  JASON, Dad, Mom multiple times. Who was your first celebrity crush?  Jesse McCartney. If applicable, what form of birth control do you use?  The pill.  But it's for cramps. Are you happy with your gender?  Yeah. What gender do you identify as?  Female. What gender were you born as? Female. Have you ever gotten high off a prescription medication?  No. Have you ever used a tampon?  Yeah. How old were you when your parents talked to you about puberty?  I don't think it's something we ever properly "talked" about, but rather indirectly when Mom taught me how to shave and told me when to start wearing a bra. How many people have you known who were suicidal?  Sadly, I think MOST people I know/most friends. What's your favorite pain reliever? Advil. Who has the cutest baby/babies you know? My nephew is literally the cutest child I have EVER seen. Do you have a lot of people blocked on Facebook? Actually yes, but most because Mom instructed me to block them when I was younger.  A few are of my own volition. What color is your razor/shaver?  Orange and white. What's your boyfriend/girlfriend's sisters name? She doesn't have any sisters. Do you like the sound of violins?  YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS. Would you be interested in going on a blind date?  Even if I was single, no. If you formed an unhealthy habit, would it be smoking or drinking? Oh boy, idk.  I think an alcohol addiction is more dangerous, but smoking has disgusting consequences. Have you ever bought a video game expansion pack? No. Do you wish YouTube had been around when you were a kid?  Nah.  I wouldn't want the risk of an earlier technology addiction. Do you remember preschool?  Yes. What color(s) was your backpack in high school?  Browns and black.  It was a Ouija board design. What health conditions do you have?  Physically, baaad dry scalp, dry af skin in general, inactive MRSA.  I've been over my mental ones enough. Have you ever collected seashells at the beach?  Yeah. Did you ever take dance lessons?  Yeah, for many years. If you took dance lessons, what was your favorite style of dance?  Modern. Have you ever worn a tutu? No. What was your favorite vacation that you went on as a child?  Disney World. Have you ever had braces?  Yeah. What is your favorite photo editing site? (or what do you use?) I don't use editing sites.  I use Photoshop, Lightroom, or PhotoScape. How many times did you take your driver's test?  I haven't yet.

#survey #quiz #questions

[authenticaussie]

Maybe MarcoSabo for send a ship????

who’s the werewolf and who’s the hunter

Marco again as the werewolf bc like…………….wb fammmmmm wb fam are Totally this rock’n’roiling pack of messy & dumb werewolves and he’s long-suffering but in an endlessly fond and adoring way, and like?? Imagine Sabo being raised by hunter!parents and knowing that what they tell him is wrong but also like they’re his parents, who is he to question them, how can he question them when he’s never known any different, when the werewolves he’s seen have been vicious and angry and cruel and tried to kill his best friend-

Marco who protects Haruta, who’s the smallest and the newest shift and they’re all so proud of her and he’s the one that’s closest to a goddamn dire wolf, what sort of beast of legend would he be if the only tale to his name was  I let my younger sister die? But Also Sabo’s never seen one of them protect anyone before and he’s like whaaat the Heck is this even a werewofl (and then sudden half-clothed man and sabo’s like ashjdfg yep he is very much a werewolf) and like!! Haruta growling and trying to get sabo to stay away but sabo has a gun and marco’s telling her to run and then because he knows she won’t run telling her to get help, and she whines but?? Does so?? And Sabo is just. What the Fuckity is going On Here and demanding to know wtf marco was doing and also jfc he keeps forgetting—(well, repressing,) that…the werewolves aren’t just wolves. They’re human under there, too….and it’s awkward talking to a wolf you just shot but he can’t shoot it(him) again. And so they talk and marco’s growling at him and being like if you go after haruta I’ll rip your throat out and sabo’s like look you’re gonna have some problems w/ that????

who’s the mermaid and who’s the fisherman

Sabo’s a marine biologist studying the effect of pollution on coral and marine life coughcoughhe’s also totally a really aggressive protester who does a Lot of shit like exposing corruption and infractions of environmental law and Marco’s the mermaid!! Sabo, while diving, accidentally snaps a picture of his tail and is like woah I’ve never seen that before…And then he’s like!!! RARE FISH MEANS WE CAN GET THIS CORAL PATCH DECLARED A PROTECTED ENVIRONMENT AND THEY CAN’T BUILD AN OIL SITE HERE. And so he goes diving heaps to try and catch sight of this fish again. And like?? random stuff also keeps happening around him?? Like, some of his notes are put in the wrong spot, and he’s sure he put them down by the table why are they now near the stern?? Why’s his sunglasses/cap missing??? where’s his left flipper??? And it all comes to a head when he looses his camera overboard while they’re sailing to a new patch to dive and he’s like !!! no!!!! Bc they can’t really get another out here and like?? Koala’s got one, but it’s hers, and it’s also technically the spare, and even if he could use it his was…It was his, and it was one of the first things he bought for himself and it’s…Sentimental

Anyway when they go diving he finds it perched on the reef and in the camera memory there’s a picture of this guy looking super shocked and heavily illuminated by the flash and holy shitting fuck the dude has a tail.

Following those photos are also really gorgeous ones of fish and coral and stuff, but Sabo’s more preoccupied with THE UNDERWATER DUDE WITH A TAIL  

who’s the witch and who’s the familiar

Again shapeshifting birb!marco as the familiar but Sabo is much better than ace at magic/practicing and is much more fascinated than ace is by the concept of magic so a lot of marco/sabo witch/famillair is sabo blowing stuff up/doing stuff he isn’t meant to and Marco being like whY THE FUCK DID YOU DO THIS THING I TOLD YOU NOT TO DO??

“It looked fun!!!/I was curious!!!” 

who’s the barista and who’s the coffee addict

They’re both coffee addicts but Marco would Totally be a barista and like no-one knows how much coffee he drinks every day bc well who knows if he’s filled up the cup again or if it’s the same cup from this morning?? (it’s totally been filled up at least 7-10 times) and Sabo is this Perpetually Exhausted young man who is like?? doing a ridiculous amount of work, people are like how have you not keeled over and d i e d yet and sabo’s like *raises coffee, looking at it vaguely like it is his god, absolutely exhausted,* “how can I die when there is still such beauty in this world??” and everyone think he’s being pretentious/talking about something actually beautiful but marco’s seen him confusedly mumbling to his laptop/coffee cup when it’s empty and bemoaning his loneliness bc how could coffee, coffee!!! of all things, leave him. Marco just gets into the habit of making sure Sabo gets a new coffee before his runs out, and also that sabo leaves the cafe rather than staying there for 24 hours in a state of absolute exhausted delirium.   

who’s the professor and who’s the TA

Sabo would be TA!!! Like I can see him being a professor but I can also see him just like, angrily colour-coding marco’s schedule and organising so much shit and marco’s vaguely annoyed because he knew what was going on and now it’s this fucking rainbow riot in his notebook and oh god sabo’s following him around and taking notes on how marco interacts w/ others and teaches and offers hints and has little stars next to things he thinks are Good and—-

sabo’s bringing him coffee at 4am Sabo is a God

who’s the knight and who’s the prince(ss)

Marco’s the knight and Sabo’s the prince!! Kind of. He’s a noble and he’s set to marry the princess but he sure as fuck doesn’t want too and he totally sneaks off and disguises himself as a pauper/doesn’t introduce himself to marco properly and marco’s like oh are you one of the new guards from the Outlooks’ place?? don’t worry abt being late I know some of the other knights are dickheads and like making sure the newbies get lost. And sabo’s just like uhhhhhh yeeeep that’s me, guard in training, t o t a l l y

Accidentally introduces himself as sabo as is like SURE DOES GET CONFUSING AT THE OUTLOOK HOME, BEING THE SECOND SABO. HAHA. HAH. Marco totally ends up figuring it out, mainly because when Sabo is confronted with things that look interesting but he knows nothing about he is curious and inquisitive to a degree that he cannot hide, and he gets curious/confused about so many things that don’t make sense, like sword smithing and break times/shifts and training regimens and what you need to study to be a knight, but like?? I don’t think Marco would make a big deal out of it. Like….he’d be shocked, and confused, and be like hooooly shit and maybe act a little weirder/stiffer around Sabo because he’s like this dude is going to be my boss some day I should really really really not find him adorable and funny and clever but also?? He totally figures out why Sabo hid it from him and why he did what he did- because there was so much freedom in curiosity, in being able to see something new, in being somewhere where people didn’t know you. And like, Sabo’s parents totally discouraged him asking questions, so like?? Marco not only permitting it but encouraging it??? Sabo loves that. 

who’s the teacher and who’s the single parent

Marco is the eternally tired and utterly adored/adoring single parent that dotes on his kids and also has several thousand siblings who also get referred to as various mom/dad/uncle/auntie/sister/brother titles and Sabo-the-only-child is like oh my god I’m So confused. He later finds out that Marco is basically just helicopter mom to all of these orphan/abandoned kids and that the wb fam is the Best foster home/orphanage system in town and all the adults are trained to deal w/ the different issues the kids might have, and support tf out of them, and Marco usually gets??? problem kids??? Or ones who need a lot of attention and to be the only kid?? Bc Marco can handle one kid, and can honestly be kind of suffocating in his affection/worry later on in the kid’s life, but he’s still?? Dude he’s raised for 40 other siblings he Knows how to Control the House. And sab’s just…super impressed and they talk about what marco’s current kid needs and sabo works harder at his job bc like!!! damn,,,marco’s inspiring w/ how much he cares……  

who’s the writer and who’s the editor

Either Sabo or Marco would make good editors!!! Sabo can be a perfectionist and is very stubborn when it comes to learning things he’s interested in (sometimes I’d like to see like….or I mean, something I’d like to see more of??? Is like, his dream was to write a book or every place he’d ever been and all the people and have a great adventure, and just?? I wish I could see more of how that would affect him in aus where he doesn’t loose his memory, BUT. DIGRESSION.) I think that while both would write, Sabo would write to a vicarious, excessive degree. Fantasy novels, travel books, food reviews, short stories, poems! Everything, and constantly. Marco is his harried and amazed editor who’s always like sabo before you start your 29873th novel what about novel 29872 and Sabo’s like,,,,,,,,,,,,,,#sweats

I can see him primarily writing travel books and huge adventure novels. Massive and intricate and delightful and !! they’re just super good. They can be a bit hard to read, bc they get a bit dense and complicated, but he’s a super smart and captivating writer, and though he errs too far into description (Marco one time sent him back a manuscript with two chapters circled and only the comment ‘sigh’ because they’d been two chapters on the history of some people who lived on a mountain who only came up once) he’s enjoyable and clever and his books are so interesting. 

#aussie's anons #ask aussie #zali #ahh my favourite is the mer one tbqh like #darn i have a scene in mind for that one which is fun #also famillair au sniggers #laughs @ myself in a vaguely depreciative tone bc i was like why do these take so long #welluhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh it's bc you're writing miniture essays u dumb dumb #marsab #marcosabo #sabomarco #sabmar #that looks weird

[dawnofspeed]

INTERVIEW MEME

★ pick one of your muses. ★ fill in the questions as if you are being interviewed for an article and you  were your muse. ★ tag some friends to do this meme! tagged by:  @sonofsuperman tagging: uh @ofaarok @stylish-alastor @purplespxedster @thedarkempath @notpietro @combvsticn @capedfound @hearstheearth @elextrospeed @alwaysxlate @ofscarllet @ofboomerangs @selfdxfined @theoreticalguardianangel​ @nevaramon​ @wallyingwestward​ @celerem​ @fastestboyalive​ @rxnningadifferentrace​ @strayimpulse​ @speedyistheotherguy​ @dcficit​ @legionrunner​ @jxsontodd​ @crownedthunder​ @believeinxtheimpossible @espressiio

1. What is your name? "I guess... since we’re in the past it doesn’t matter that much if I reveal myself? I go by Cyclone mostly. One of the Tornado Twins. My brother, he’s Hurricane.” She smiled and reached into her pocket, pulling out a photograph of them together in costume. “He’s sorta busy with uh- see he has this girlfriend-- never mind. Scratch that. Off the record.”

2. What is your real name? "Wait. Are you working for someone? I can’t just give out my real name, geez! It’s like painting a bullseye on my back and saying ‘Dear all enemies, here I am!’. Do you really ask that of people?” Dawn frowns and crosses her arms. “What? Does Batman just TELL you who he is? Superman?”

3. Do you know why you’re called that? A giant grin crosses the ginger’s face. “Okay so, my brother and I weren’t allowed legacy names because that was just asking to be murdered, where we come from. Really sucks, because I totally wanted to be one of the legacies. And it’s unfair too because everyone in my family gets to and I’ve been dreaming aboutitsinceIwaslittle. Anyway, moving on, so Hurricane and I had to come up with something. Our mom always used to comment when we entered a room at speed that ‘here comes the Tornado Twins’ and it just stuck. Didn’t help that we both got a little obsessed in the third grade with making mini whirlwinds. But yeah, we also needed separate names so I chose Cyclone and he got Hurricane.”

4. Are you single or taken? "Uhhhhhh... I’m a lover AND a fighter. What do you think?” She winks. Mainly, revealing that information could be extremely damaging to the timeline.

5. What are your powers and abilities? "WELL I’m a speedster so I’m fast as all hell, last time we measured Hurricane and I were at light barrier speeds so that’s pretty cool. Course, we’re not always great on control. Kinda working on that. We can also create those whirlwinds I mentioned, we’re both trained in combat by the Virtual Physical Training facility... Vibrating through matter. Time travel. Speed healing. Split second processing. Does smartness count?”

6. What color are your eyes? “Blue! Mom always said I look similar to my dad, and got his brains but I got a lot of her personality.”

7. Have you ever dyed your hair? "I tried to, but the colour doesn’t stay in when I run. Like I dyed it my mom’s colour but when we vibrated through the walls, my hair was back to normal. Kinda like how I can’t keep tattoos because they heal off.”

8. Do you have any family members? She frowned slightly and looked away. “There’s my brother. And my mom. We’re not really connected with anyone else. I mean, I want to be but there’s a lot of baggage there.”

9. Do you have any pets? Dawn brightened considerably. “A rabbit. He’s called Marshmallow. And recently I got a dog called Pancake.”

10. Tell me about something you don’t like. "There’s a lot of things I don’t like but the main ones are systematic oppression, xenophobia and lack of activism. If you want true justice and equality you have to be willing to stand up and go against the things you don’t agree with. I’ve learnt that the hard way.”

11. Do you have any hobbies or activities you do in your spare time? "I love science so little experiments are always fun. I do a lot of running and training. Research. I used to waitress a bit. Cooking. I’m not great at it but it’s cool. Oh! Dance and gymnastics. I love those. Trying to get back into it because there’s so much on offer here.”

12. Have you ever hurt anyone before? "Uh. YEAH. They deserved it! Look, Karate Kid and people like him, they’re tough. They’re hard. Superboy couldn’t take him down, and the only way was to beat his ass. So I did. But we saved a tonne of people and KK is on the road to redemption now. Win-Win.”

13. Have you ever… Killed anyone? Dawn shook her head. “We’ve been close to death and close to killing, but luckily Hurricane and I have the time and powers to avoid going that far. At least, so far. But with the things are in my timeline I’m not sure how much longer we can hold out against Thawne and the Dominators on our own.”

14. What kind of animal are you? "Mmmmmm! I’m not sure. I’d like to think I’m fierce but also sweet and loyal. You know?”

15. Name your worst habits. "Binge eating and leaving nothing for anyone. Nitpicking. Replying to people with sarcasm and sass that is unwarranted. Tearing myself down.”

16. Do you look up to anyone? "When I was young I used to look up to my dad and my cousin. When it began to feel like I was alone, and not worth the effort, I stopped holding them on a pedastool. Now I look up to 20th and 21st century female heroes! Like Batgirl, Oracle, Wonder Woman, Supergirl, Wondergirl... you know. The amazing babes?”

17. Gay, straight, or bisexual? Dawn stared, “Why? What does it matter? Anything goes really. As long as you love and respect me and I’m the same to you, then it’s good.”

18. Do you go to school? "I did. It was a Mind Link school, with weekly real world periods, and occasional life excursions. It was okay, and made it easier for Hurricane and I to fly under the radar and avoid being noticed. But it was also kinda lonely. I’m glad I’m done. I want to go to graduate school, though.”

19. Do you ever want to marry and have kids someday? "Totally. I want a family of my own. Someone to love and be loved by, and supported. Kids. My biggest worry is that I die like my dad did and leave that family alone... without me. It haunts me. Makes it harder to connect to people longterm.”

20. Do you have any fans? "I don’t think so. I don’t know why I would. Not like I’m a Flash legacy.” Her tone is bitter. “ ‘sides, where I come from metas are hated, not adored. And here I don’t matter to anyone.”

21. What are you most afraid of? "Abandonment.” True, death was a fear of hers, but it wasn’t the biggest one. “Being close to anyone is terrifying. I know I’m not a worthwhile cause, I’m just waiting for them to realise it. And my mom... the timeline is so unstable she could disappear through no fault of her own. The only person I can ever truly rely on and trust is Hurricane. He’s my rock.”

22. What do you usually wear? "Comfy, speed resistant shoes. Clothes that are easy to move in. Nothing specific.”

23. Do you love someone? "I love my family. I mean... I love my mom, and my brother.” Everyone else... could forget her or disappear or she deemed not to care anyway. 

24. What class are you? "Uh.” Her mom worked hard but when you’re living on edge and flying peacefully below the radar it was hard to make it work. “We’re middle class... to lower middle class. My brother and I both try to help out, especially with our eating habits.”

25. How many friends do you have? "I’ve made some in this timeline but it’s easier here. And they have their own lives to lead, while mine is... all up in the air.”

26. What are your thoughts on pie? "What’s a pie?”

27. Favorite drink? "Ooohhhhh, there’s this really cool drink developed on Venus that comes with living flowers in it and it fizzes and-- it’s so amazing. I love it.”

29. What is your favorite place? Dawn shrugged. “I don’t have one.” She didn’t like attachment, and she always felt out of place.

30. Are you interested in someone? She shrugged again. “Doesn’t really make a difference.”

31. What’s your bra size?  “Bra... size? Um. Wait, those are the feminine body support clothing? My support size is a T70.”

32. Would you rather swim in the lake or the ocean? "Ocean! I love the ocean. It’s one of the only places you can feel free and unconcerned. And it’s amazing how it got saved in 2890.”

33. What’s your ‘type’? "I don’t do types.” She kind of did, but Dawn was yet to realise the few types she seemed to attract or be attracted to. “Everyone is cool and interesting and has something attractive about them.”

34. Any fetishes? Dawn tilted her head in thought. Did she have any? “I kinda like... attention. Being adored. Affection all over. Compliments. Fastest thing to turn me on.” Why is she so open about this? Her century kind of didn’t have the sex taboos that ours does.

35. Top or bottom? Dominant or submissive?  “I like both a lot. Swing between the two. But it depends on the personality type I’m with. Sometimes I just KNOW when to be dominant, when it’s going to work. Other times, I know when to play off the other person, be dominated, let go of my control for a while...”

36. Camping, or indoors? "Ooooo! I love camping. It’s so freeing!”

37. Are you waiting for this interview to be over? “A little, but I kind of like the attention.” She admitted, no one really wanted to know this much about her usually. “Thanks.”

#long post for ts #long post #dawn hc #dawn headcanon

[deeeelightfuldee]

surveyss 012.

If the last person you kissed invited you to a family dinner, would you go? Ohhhh heck-ie no. No, no, no. Noooooooooooooooooooo.

Has anyone ever told one of your secrets they promised they wouldn’t tell? I very seldom share anything that is a secret. It’s possible someone could have but I mean really, if I am that concerned about sharing then I won’t share.

Do you remember what you were wearing last time you cried? pajamas. Do you have any friends you have never gotten into an argument with? I don’t think I’ve ever gotten in an argument with em.

Do you think you could survive living by yourself for a month? If I had money to do so, heckkkkkkkkk yessssssss.

Can you cook anything other then toast? yes.

Have you ever lended the last person you called, money? Yes.

How many times have you cried over the last person you cried over? Oooof. Many times. I am positive he doesn’t even know how much.

Have you ever been in an on-and-off relationship? So annoying right? I suppose ish. We were such a great fit but the timing was crap.

Have you ever developed a crush on someone the first day you met them? Ha! YES. that has happened twice.

Have you ever been with someone who was really clingy? Did it annoy you? I have. actually, most of the guys I have been with have turned super clingy. Sometimes I appreciate the situation, sometimes I’m extremely turned off. Depends on who.

Is there a store you go to so much the employees know your name? They did at meijer for a while but I haven’t been there in months.

Did you get the last person you texted a present for their last birthday? Uhhh, not a present but a card yes.

Would you be able to live without the last person you fought with? That’s what i’m in the process of doing now. I would have originally said absolutely no way. I’m not sure how to do it, but I just keep on going. I’ll figure it out somehow.

Does your best friend get along with their parents? Em does get along with both her parents. Nathan gets along better with his mom than his dad. I know I shouldn’t count Kile anymore, but he got along with his dad for the most part and didn’t interact much with his mom.

Would you be able to tell me your mom’s favorite food? I know she loves like 14 things from the coopers hawk menu as her fave

Has anyone seen you naked in the past 48 hours? lololol no comment.

Is there anything in you room your parents would be pissed about? What? Uhhhhhh, probably. Not pissed, but like whaaaaaaa.

Have you ever sneezed more than 10 times in a row? Yes one time that I can recall. It was when I first realized I had very much developed an allergy lol.

Do you have any friends who never shut up about their boyfriend/girlfriend? Ugh, I have in the past. not now.

Where did you buy your favorite pair of jeans? I’m pretty sure old navy.

Has anyone ever told you they loved you but not meant it? Yeah. I’m so over that.

Have you ever helped someone while they were drunk puking?  Hahahahaha yea. Though I wasn’t much help. I had to peel myself off the grass in order to do it lolol

What annoys you more to do, sneeze or cough? Coughing. I hate thinking about what it does to the vocal folds.

Would you rather have a pet snake or a pet cat? CATTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT.

Are you welcome at the last person you kissed house? I think he would probably think so, I would never try. 

Did you have any unread texts when you woke up today? Yes. people seem to want to start communicating at like 3 am. 

Do you fall for all the lines about making guys/girls like you on magazine covers?  I can’t recall the last magazine I read.

Do you have a calendar in your room? What’s it’s theme? No I do not.

Have you ever gotten anything racist about you yelled at you? Yeah one time a customer was super pissed at me because they wanted to print a registry at the registry counter and they were like 6th in my line. There were people of all different ethnicities in front of them, and they started screaming that I was racist and not taking them first. I then had a coworker of the same ethnicity as this customer kick them out of the store. It was so awkward because I couldn’t do anything about it.

Does the last person whose house you were at like anyone? Oh definitely.

Have you ever watched someone being carried into an ambulance? Goodness, many many many times. Is that unusual?

Do you own more pink or black clothes? By far black. I’m trying to introduce more color.

Has a boyfriend/girlfriend ever given you a stuffed animal? Hahaha yes. I had someone win me one at a carnival one time and that will forever be special to me. I would love for someone to do that that I genuinely care about though lol. I’ve gotten other ones for special occasions.

Do you think you could be with one person for the rest of your life starting now? I would love to begin a life with someone, but I don’t know of anyone right now that would fit that role for me. What time did you wake up last Saturday? Why? I am trying to recall if I got up early for any reason. I wanna say that I did not because it was super stormy and glorious. 

What does the last body wash you used smell like? It’s this lovely scent that matches a body spray I used on my first day of college. It instantly makes me calm.