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#but like I'm not upset at them really so I don't want people to be like 'oh this person was mean' or whatever
silverynight · 1 day
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Dynamight's type
Izuku has noticed that whenever someone asks Katsuki's certain questions during interviews he gets really irritated; it's usually things about love and relationships that bother him the most.
It's one of the many reasons why Izuku hasn't told his best friend he likes him romantically; maybe Katsuki is not interested in romance at all or he just hates sharing his love life with the world.
Although it's not like Izuku ever thought he had a chance; he probably doesn't. Sometimes he thinks about looking for someone to start a relationship with.
"Let's move in together," Katsuki tells him for the... actually, Izuku has lost count of how many times he has told him that.
But Izuku always thinks he doesn't mean it because it doesn't make sense.
"Why?"
"Just because..." Katsuki says this time, looking particularly frustrated.
"We don't have the need to," Izuku points out, getting a little bit confused by his friend's response.
"I know."
"Kacchan... what if one of us starts dating soon? Wouldn't that be–"
The look Katsuki throws at him is enough to make Izuku shut up immediately; the other pro hero not only looks angry, he also seems hurt.
"Are you seeing someone?" The way Katsuki asks the question makes it look like each word is hurting him somehow.
"No, but–"
"I'm not going to start dating an extra!" Katsuki growls and, as usual, he walks away more irritated than when the day started.
Izuku honestly doesn't get it.
However, he usually goes back to normal when his patrol begins.
Until a reporter finds him after an incident; just right the moment after Katsuki and Izuku manage to save a group of people from a villain.
Actually, there are a couple of reporters, one of them even tries to corner Izuku and instead of asking him about the villain or the civilians, she asks Izuku about romance.
Alright, Izuku has started to get why Katsuki gets irritated at those type of questions.
"Are you dating someone at the moment, Deku?" The young woman asks, smiling at him and using one of her fingers to play with her own hair.
Izuku doesn't understand; is she nervous?
"Uhh... no."
"That's great!"
Not that far from him, one of the reporters is asking about Katsuki's type... again.
"So what would your ideal date be, Deku?" The reporter manages to draw Izuku's attention away from his friend.
"Maybe an amusement park? Sharing a crepe?" The green haired hero doesn't mean to make it sound like a question, but interviews always make him feel flustered.
"That'd be a perfect date for me too!" The girl says. "Would you like to–"
"DO YOU REALLY WANT TO KNOW MY FUCKING TYPE?" Katsuki's loud voice cuts off the reporter who's interviewing Izuku.
"Of course, Dynamight!" It's a good thing most of the reporters are used to Katsuki's explosive personality already.
Instead of answering right away, Katsuki gets closer to Izuku and to everyone's surprise, grabs the other pro hero's freckled face and kisses him on the lips.
"There. That's my type!" Katsuki growls as Izuku's face turns completely pink. "Him. Only this nerd. Now, fuck off!"
The female reporter who was asking Izuku questions looks particularly upset about what happened, although it seems like she's a little bit reluctant to go... but she does anyway when she notices Katsuki is glaring at her.
Izuku doesn't get his hopes up, because it's obvious that Katsuki only wanted them to stop asking questions about his love life.
"But Kacchan... they're going to think we are–"
"Move in with me."
"Why?"
It feels like this is not the moment to have the same conversation all over again, but there's something different in Katsuki's eyes this time; he looks determined.
"Because I'm in love with you, oblivious nerd!"
Izuku's face is on fire, he's sure of it; Katsuki just told him he loved him. It almost seems like it's a dream.
"Are you sure, Kacchan?" His voice doesn't sound shaky at all, which is something Izuku feels ridiculously proud of.
"Of course I am! Wouldn't be asking you if I wasn't!"
After a heartbeat in which Izuku thinks about all the time they've been together and tells himself this is going to work, he nods.
"Let's move in together, Kacchan."
Just a year later, Katsuki proposes to him and of course, Izuku can't help but tear up. He's never been so happy before.
***
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pururing · 3 days
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Hi everyone, thank you so much for your supportive messages. I'm not sure if it's okay to answer since I don't allow anonymous questions, so I didn't. I'll go thank you personally later when I have time.
I was pretty upset yesterday and will be thinking about what to do for a while(probably just sit and wait for the next episode for now), but thanks to a few people who were willing to speak up, I had a much better day for you. It means a lot to me that you took the risk of getting involved in a needless dispute and did this.
I think most of the communication failures start with the disagreement that Asians can't be whiter than Caucasians (I'm not convinced of this, so I prefer the way it's portrayed in the show).
And when I said that children tend to have lighter skin than their parents, I meant that they are generally lighter because they haven't seen much sunlight yet. They will change as they grow, This is due to the experience of watching many children(mostly my baby sibling and cousins) and my own growing up experience. but perhaps my translator mistranslated it as "getting lighter as they older" which is opposit of what I tried to tell, and I didn't catch it, so there was some miscommunication.
As I mentioned, I'm just working from what I see on the screen. I did find some pictures that suggest that Jee may look brighter than maddie, but I won't upload them here because the gif creator may be offended that I'm dragging his work into this debate. (My google search was jee maddie. If anyone wants to look it up.)
I don't think there's any more controversy to be had, and I'm sure anyone who disagrees with me has already blocked me, so I'm going to try something a little different. Here's the real reason for my boring and long post.
I wanted to clarify that I am very careful with racial descriptions.
As I said before, I'm a mainstream Korean and because of this, I grew up in an atmosphere that was pretty indifferent to other cultures and countries. When I became an adult, I was fortunate enough to have friends from Europe, America, Canada, Latin America, Southeast Asia, etc. I was quite shocked. The world is so much bigger and more diverse than what I had conceptually known. And that people in those cultures are very proud of their identity. And I really respect it.
After that realization, I could have gone back to living a normal life in Korea, but unfortunately, I was born to be a fanartist, and I started to like foreign content instead of Korean content. (like Japanese, Chinese, English-based content, etc.).
I learned about how some effective but insensitive depictions can be historically and realistically offensive and unpleasant experiences for certain races. The problem is that there are a lot of small details that you really don't notice if you're not a party to them, especially since so many discussions are primarily in English and the information curated by a few active people and translated into our social media is where most of our knowledge comes from, so we can offend people without even trying.
I am very aware of this and am open to input from others in this regard. I am very cautious about drawing a race I don't know in the first place, so I try to avoid realistic depictions. But on the other hand, the "cartoon" style I've been taught actually leads me to omit many features. Age, body type, beauty. So this is the style I've adopted when I want to draw fanart of works based on real people, especially if they're multiracial (especially since I've always been more of a comic artist than an illustrator.) I wish I was a better artist and had more options, but honestly, this is my limit. Sorry.
I would like to apologize if anyone feels hurt or upset by any of my non-Asian characters and thinks they are too stereotypical, don't look like them at all, or are too ridiculous.(Even white people. I was taught that there are many differences and histories even among people who are considered white.)
I really don't want to use my art style as a shield to justify any depiction of race, and I'm worried that someone might get the wrong idea that I have such an opinion.
All of my intentions are simply to make sure that no one in the fandom is offended by the artwork, and to provide some lighthearted entertainment that is just a good laugh at a silly cartoon.
Sometimes people wonder why we invest so much passion into a character on screen, but it's a great feeling to share and empathize with someone who feels the same way. Especially when they have something in common with you. That's why I cared so much about Jee and Chimney even though I'm primarily a Buddie shipper. I don't know a lot about immigrants, but I found it very funny and entertaining that he immigrated when he was 5 years old, his family moved back to Korea, and his father video calls from his very traditional grandfather's room. Despite the many inaccuracies, it's fun to see someone try this hard. I will say here that I am very cautious when drawing other races because I understand that my inaccurate depictions can create an unpleasant experience for others, especially if they feel a strong connection to them.
So, I'm not sure what I will do in the future or when I will draw and share more, but if anyone finds any depictions in my future drawings that may be offensive, I will be open to being corrected. I just don't want my Korean identity to be infringed upon by claims that I don't resemble the way "Asian stereotypes" are drawn. (There's a reason I say Korean identity, not Asian or East Asian. The history here is too complex to group into one word…) I will respect others and you will respect me. That's all I want.
Anyway, that's all I have to say. I am aware that my upbringing inevitably narrows my perspective, and I don't want to use my people of color or non-Western culture as a weapon to further an agenda of agency that I don't have.
If anyone is still reading, thanks for the long read. really. And I'm sorry for bringing conflict into the fandom.
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AITA for sort of ignoring when my boyfriend is upset?
My boyfriend struggles with some depression, and I'm of course supportive, as someone with a lot of mental health issues myself. We're generally very communicative about a lot of things.
The thing is, sometimes he's clearly upset about something or talks badly about himself, but in a way where he's sort of dropping obvious hints without saying something like "I'm really upset" or "I could use support right now." For example, I'll be talking about something I did with my friends, and he'll say something like "that's great, I'm glad you had fun! I wish people liked me enough to do fun stuff like that." And I don't really know how to respond? Like I wasn't trying to gloat or anything, I just tell him about things in my life. And I know he's genuine when he says he's glad I had a good time or whatever. He's just really really insecure.
There was a time recently, for example, when a friend had offered to take pictures of me outside of a party we were both at. I told him that I was going outside and he asked if he should come with, and I said sure! Afterwards he was really torn up about whether he was supposed to come outside with me or if I was just saying that to be nice, but like I wish he trusted me in that me saying yes means I'm saying yes. If I didn't want him to come with, I would have said no. I don't really have any issues with saying no to people.
Previously I was reassuring him when he brought these sorts of things up, but to be frank it's gotten kind of tiring. There's only so many times I can say "you're a good person who is fun to be around and I like you" until it gets on my nerves. It feels like what I say doesn't make any impact on him, which I know isn't his fault, but it's frustrating for me. So I'm kind of like. Why bother repeating the same thing again and again if it isn't making a difference?
Also, because I anticipate this being brought up, I've asked for support explicitly before and he's given me support. It kinda feels like he cares about supporting me more than he cares about himself, which is sweet and all but I don't like that. I want him to care about himself too. I've told him this, and told him he can ask me for support when he needs it.
For the record, the times where he has explicitly said he's not doing well/needs support I've offered it. If he says "I really need a hug next time we hang out" or whatever, I'll do it. I just sometimes feel like an emotional nanny to be honest, because it feels like I have to be on alert for these hints or whatever and take care of the insecurity.
So, am I the asshole for not responding to my boyfriend's upset feelings unless he explicitly states them and/or asks for support?
What are these acronyms?
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shiraishi-kanade · 2 days
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Interactions that I want to see in proseka: An Shiraishi edition
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Buckle up, folks. This is gonna be a long one.
New interactions
An & Kanade: this is actually more of a biased one (in a "I want to see two of my favourite characters interact" way), but I really hope to see more of them. An and Kanade are aware of each other's existence through Mizuki and the Twilight Festival event, but it's very surface level and I really want their potential to be explored more.
Despite appearing very different on the surface level and leading very different lifestyles, An and Kanade have been foils to each other basically since launch. They both grew up surrounded by music; they both have, and have shown since a very young age, a prominent talent in it (singing and composing respectively); they're both extremely passionate about what they do and are very hardworking, to the point of sacrificing their own well-being to it (a trait that, interestingly, more like early Kanade, but more recent An), and they also have a shared topic of grief.
Both An and Kanade suffered a loss of a loved one that impacted them deeply, and both of them choose to, at least to some extent, repress their own feelings regarding that. While I don't think their interaction/event should necessarily touch on that topic, I think it would be good for the both of them to have a friend who can relate to something that horrifying and personal.
(Additionally, while we didn't know what killed Kanade's mom, we know it was some kind of illness, and chances are it'll be same/similar to what killed Nagi. If Kanade shared how it was for her to witness her mom slowly fading away... I think that would make for an interesting conversation.)
Honestly, I'd take just about anything with those two, from grief and angst to composing and potentially even light-hearted event like Spojoy Park. I just really want them to meet properly.
An & Emu: Genki girls!! They are very dear to me personally despite not having met properly yet. They're also the reason I'm upset An has moved on from disciplinary committee: missed opportunity for her to catch Emu sneaking in! They would be fun to be around each other, I think, once An would get used to Emu's manner of speech (which she also somewhat shares, as shown in Nuanced Language sidestory. An being able to understand Emu-language from the get go would be a hilarious twist)
On the more serious note! Emu and An have a lot of shared themes, especially those of loneliness and abandonment issues, and also the way they chose to deal with those feelings. A lot of people say they're suppressing their emotions; I'm rather inclined to say they're avoiding them. If faced with each other who are, in a way, a reflection of their flaws, they might not be able to avoid it anymore - I think that would potentially be a very insightful interaction for them.
Moreover, they (along with a couple other characters, like Touya and Kanade, although for them it's much more minor) share the topic of legacy. Both of them lost a close one that has left behind a dream and both of them, voluntarily, stepped up to keep it alive. I think in that regard An and Emu would be able to understand each other in a very unique way. They have way more to their possible friendship than it seems on a surface level.
An & Mafuyu: one of An's most defining character traits is being a good friend and accepting of everyone - more than that, she earnestly believes she could accept all people if she tried hard enough. I think, for Mafuyu, having a friend, or even an acquaintance like that, someone who is put off by her behaviour and overall mannerisms but actively tries to understand her and be friends with her despite that, as well as someone who is so passionate about a dream she has she build her whole life around it, would be very useful.
(this is also the reason I hold a grudge with 2024 White Day event. It's beautiful and fun and all but An's not had a limited card for over a year and haven't had neither Valentine's nor White day, I thought FOR SURE this one. We could have had it all :( )
An & Saki: similar to An and Emu, both of them have a lot of both serious and comedic potential. They're lively, they're athletic, they're passionate about music - there is no feasible reason for them to not hit it off right away when they meet. I don't quite imagine the rest of their groups being able to keep up with their energy.
Still, underneath that energy, there is an underlying topic of loneliness that they both went through, and although An's is incomparable to Saki's, I think there would be this kind of understanding between them, too. While being extroverted and having a lot of friends, An has spend years searching for "her" person without success up until main story. I don't think she had any actual, deep bonds with peers going on in her life aside Haruka. Having a close-knit, big friend group might just be what both An and Saki have missed out on in middle school. That's an interesting observation, isn't it?
More of That, please (Already know each other but I want to see them More)
An & Haruka: in terms of Haruka and An, I really want to see more backstory for them. I know we've already seen it briefly, but there is so much more to it. How close were they? Did Haruka know Nagi in person or from description? What is Haruka's relationship with Vivid Street? Did she go to WEG to sort her thoughts out because An was there, or because it has a connection to her, too (The Non-Idol Me sidestory)? Did they grow more distant throughout Junior High? There is much to unpack here still!
And also, I just like their friendship overall and think we're really lacking their area interactions and accidental meetings, stuff like that. There should definitely be more.
An & Rui: the sillies. Now that An isn't a hall monitor I expect her to take absolute delight in Rui's antics.
They've performed together a total of three times (if we count the New Year show, even though it was more of a Tsukasa stage) and all of them went spectacularly. An is just the right amount of impulsive and reckless to be someone who's able to meet Rui's ideas halfway and match his energy, even though she's normally skeptical about it when she isn't a part of the performance. Hell, An even jokingly mentions becoming an actress!
I think they definitely should interact more and I want it to be utterly ridiculous. It's a shame it didn't happen a little earlier in Rui's story, but, for example, An (together with some other characters) doing acting gigs for Rui could be extremely fun.
An & Tsukasa: both the comedic and the serious angst potential is there; An's and Tsukasa's recent arcs do align quite nicely even though they're not exactly the same. They could probably have a nice conversation about it.
I think it's also fun to see An not realising that she comes off just as loud and pushy to other people as Tsukasa seems to her. But they definitely do have the same energy! I really liked Let's Study Hard and the New Year's Show for that; they're extremely passionate and Tsukasa admires An's passion and skill - I wish they elaborated on this more!
Also, An should definitely have something going on with Tsukasa with her passing the role of the hall monitor to him, especially with Rui around. No way they won't even mention it.
An & Shiho: they had an awesome time together during the In The Corner of Resonant Town and I'm BEGGING for them to get closer as friends. From fashion sense to music to their personal issues, they have a lot in common. I think they've had their share of deep talks and I'm not exactly looking for that anymore; something more relaxed like a jam session or just hanging out is another thing, thought.
An & Ichika: I'm biased in a way that I love them and I also think it would be very funny for Ichika to have a second vocal teacher. Ichika & Nene are very dear to my heart, but as things stand, An should canonically be more skilled in vocals (while Nene is definitely a superior actor) and her skillset probably fits Ichika's genre better. And An was teaching Kohane at the start, so we know she knows how to! There is no particular motive behind it other than I want to see them together more and I think that would be a perfect way for them to get closer.
Additionally, Shiho mentioned how An must be experienced in MCing and how there must be a lot they can learn from her. That. I want that to happen so badly.
An & Nene: no thought head empty just please more of them. Especially singing. I want them to sing together again, I loved hearing Nene's little monologue and I like the way Nene was able to give An tips on acting and singing while acting; they're extremely sweet, they're polar opposites while also being similar in a bizarre way, and I really want the writers to go all in with the classmates thing.
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cutecinnamoroll · 5 hours
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what does your future spouse/partners jealousy look like when it comes to you?
HIII AND WELCOME TO A NEW PICK A CARD LOVELIES!! pls remember to take this as a grain of salt as it is a general reading!! I just got paid so I went out shopping today and got some stuff I needed (I also bought plushies)
pile 1: okay so your future partner or spouse can be a bit controlling when they're jealous! they might be the type to scheme to try to get you to cut off this person. I also feel like they'd probably just be straight up though and tell you to block them if they make them uncomfortable. honestly when you're future partner is jealous they're scared this person is going to take you away from them and you'll move on with whoever this person is and leave them so you should definitely give them reassurance so your future partner doesn't live inside their head so much about this. reassurance and communication definitely is key. yeah they're probably due to the friends you have and therefore that triggers they're insecurities, if a friend is being too touchy they might come to u and tell u that it makes them uncomfy!! im getting they might get upset when they feel like you're way TOO close with your friends or other people that aren't them. they feel like they're overthinking and insecurities kind of manifests these awful moments where you're too confident around other people and touchy with other people and it really scares them. I think they will feel much better if you just reassure them that nothing is going on between you or another person/friend. I feel like they're not THAT jealous but a few friends you have just raise red flags for them. most of the time they're really sweet and open with your friends!
pile 2: so I'm getting that your future partner is actually pretty secure from what the guides are telling me which is great! so this doesn't happen often. that or they're so happy and fulfilled in this relationship that feelings like these don't often arise. when they do get jealous though they overthink and get really frustrated and JUST STRESSED. they get stressed as hell, wondering if what they're seeing or hearing is just a rumor and nothing is going on. they're not the type to do any negative confrontation. they might not even be the type to come to you and tell you you should cut this person off, whether it be a friend or ex. that's just not it for them, they don't roll like that. but it'll be hard for them to let it go because they're HELLA STRESSED SOMETHING ELSE IS GOING ON!! they'll just feel so upset, I'm getting they'll clutch their chest in pain. also I'm getting ur fs might be more feminine or is a woman, and if u don't like girls they might be a guy with longer hair🥰 they just feel like their day is ruined or they just don't know how to handle a situation like this because they believe if they make any sudden decisions it'll ruin what you have. GIRL THEY ARE STRESSED AND SCARED OUT OF THEIR MINDS. you seem really special to them so something like this gives them hella anxiety. honestly they're not the type to confront you or do something drastic, but they might just come to you and ask you if anything is going on? without being too rash and just spouting insults about this person or telling u to block them! they just want to hear it from you if there's any weird things going on because they trust you! GOSH PLS DONT BREAK THIS PERSONS HEART THEY SEEM SO PRECIOUS! they might have a very soft voice :D
pile 3: okay so I'm getting they're not usually the type to get jealous, they simply just don't care, if they're jealous they'll just come up to you and flirt with you and kiss your neck while some weirdo is trying to flirt with you, they'll stake their claim on you by saying hey this person's mine by kissing you or touching you, grabbing you and being all over you!! they'll show the other person that you're theirs by just being all over you and giving you their love by physical touch. they seem pretty forgiving. but if you genuinely hurt their feelings they might pull back from you a little bit because they're not about that and they know their worth. honestly they don't have many insecurities it seems but they're very honest if someone makes them uncomfortable when it comes to you, they'll just talk to you about it basically, honestly they'll think of a way to embarrass the other person like saying THIS ONES MINE SUCKAAAA!! by touching you or kissing your neck. they're not the type to fight physically with other people over jealousy tbh!!
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gaycrashbandicoot · 2 days
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there is a subreddit (on reddit lol) called r/ftmpassing and trans guys post pictures on it to see if they pass* and people on there are very brutally honest about the pictures. which is like obviously fine bcs there's no point asking ppl if u pass if ur worried about not passing and they don't tell you the truth. HOWEVER I know for certain some ppl who post on there think they pass or are expecting to be validated and then they are upset they are told they aren't passing and told exactly why and it isn't necessarily something they can change.
like passing is such a changable thing depending on the culture you live in and also your body moves differently in real life than in pictures like I've met trans guys who passed in pictures but didn't pass in real life or vice versa like someone seeing the way u move and speak definitely effects how you pass and I know the people in the comments are working with what they have but I think it's a very American centric view of passing first of all like if u pass in America you won't necessarily pass everywhere and vice versa. and also given that they don't have the full information about ur mannerisms and your body in motion they are very brutal with their comments.
like me personally I pass as a cis man 100% of the time even pre T I passed 50 - 60% of the time and I'm not even genetically gifted, I live near an open minded area which helps and also pre t the main ppl who misgendered me were old ladies. and now I know I pass I'm never misgendered or having my gender questioned in public spaces like i used to and I even pass to trans people who often don't believe me when I tell them I'm trans and I've genuinely been asked over and over again if I'm joking or actually trans by trans people I meet and told I pass really well. but I reckon if I put a picture on that subreddit I would be told I don't pass because I don't look how you expect a passing trans man to look also I think I pass more irl than in pictures bcs I have masculine mannerisms which helps.
idk I just understand the point of the sub but I hope the ppl recieving the comments know that it is very subjective and they don't necessarily have to change the things they are told to bcs they might pass! and ppl on reddit are not the arbiter of ur passing capabilities.
*(and I'm actually not criticising this as a concept I know there is discourse about passing in the trans community but I think that "passing isn't everyone's goal of transitioning and it's absolutely fine if trans ppl can't or don't want to pass" and "passing can lead to safety and comfort and is some ppls trans goal so it's okay to want that" are two statements that can coexist)
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shepherds-of-haven · 2 days
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Hi Lena! I remember Chase referring to MC as their 'guaranteed ace in the hole' or something along those lines before they headed out on the bog adventure (sorry, I've forgotten the exact name of the town they get to) - how would the RO's react to a MC who gets uncomfortable when referred to as a fail-safe / guaranteed win / trump card kind of thing, or if MC pulled them to one side and asked them not to say things like that because they weren't comfortable with it / feel they might jinx it? Thanks for all your hard work, the game is amazing!
Hi there, thanks for your question, it's an interesting one!
Blade: I think he would be disconcerted to hear this from MC, and while outwardly agreeing not to say anything like that in the future, he'd feel guilty and conscious of having made them feel the burden of responsibility and over-relying on them too much, so he's probably be a bit distant towards them afterwards (trying to be considerate by not relying too heavily on them/putting pressure on them, which could come off as coldness)
Trouble: "oh shit, sorry, I didn't think about that. But I don't think it'd jinx it, you're MC after all! But I get it, I'll try not to say anything like that again." I think if it were about MC's discomfort, he'd feel a bit guilty, but also like he wished they saw what he saw in them, this total confidence and faith, but he'd ultimately respect their wishes and try not to do anything like it again. If it was more of a superstitious thing, I think he'd challenge them a little bit on it, like "Nah, have more faith in yourself, look at what you did in ____ and _____, after all!" Like trying to hype them up a bit and give them more confidence in a good-intentioned way, which might result in a back-and-forth where he came off as a bit stubbornly asserting his faith in them and wanting them to feel the confidence he feels in them, which could also make MC feel frustrated, like he's not getting it. Ultimately he'd concede and drop the subject, but feel a bit troubled about it after, but not in a way that he'd really articulate unless MC brought it up again!
Tallys: I really don't think Tallys would say anything like this to begin with, because she's already conscious of how it might make MC feel and how she would feel if she were in their shoes, so she tends to avoid making statements like this right out of the gate!
Shery: she'd feel horrifically guilty, lol, and she'd apologize to MC profusely over and over and sort of torment herself about it afterwards, like, I'm just another of the people who depend too much on MC, I never even considered their feelings, I'm a selfish person... So she'd definitely feel a bit subdued by this!
Riel: he rarely makes statements like this unless it's a joke/sincere compliment, so he'd be a bit surprised to hear that MC felt that way. But ultimately he'd just accept it, briefly apologize, and then move on, as with any well-intentioned social gaffe. It makes sense to him why MC would feel that way; it would make sense to him why he would have said otherwise. Very straightforward! It would be pretty much business as usual after that--he's glad that they communicated it to him and then doesn't think too much about it afterward unless they seemed really upset!
Chase: I like to think that he's emotionally perceptive enough to avoid making comments like this to an MC who was obviously uncomfortable with it, but YMMV, obviously, since he says it in the game! If they asked him not to, he'd sort of say something like, "Aw, sunshine, I didn't mean anything like that, you know we all think you're the cat's pajamas, that's all, it's not like we expect you to do anything or be perfect" and would try to explore their feelings about it and why they felt that way. Basically he would just try to clear the air or walk things back to make sure they didn't feel that kind of pressure moving forward or understood that he wasn't implying anything by the statement, then encourage them to just live their life without feeling the burden of these expectations. Then he'd move on and try to be more delicate in the future! Ultimately, he'd get it, he can see how being "the Hero of Haven" would be a lot of pressure!
Red: I think he'd quickly apologize, but would want to know more about why MC was feeling that way, what caused that reaction, etc. So he'd be interested in talking about it with them in more depth. He'd feel bad, of course, that he said something that bothered them, but I think his priorities would be more about understanding their perspective and maybe helping them with their discomfort/complex feelings about the whole thing than dwelling on the specific interaction that kicked it all off, if that makes any sense!
Ayla: I think her initial reaction to this would be defensiveness: she'd be a bit annoyed, because praise and compliments already come so rarely from her, especially being vocalized in front of the subject/other people, so to be "corrected" on something that's already difficult for her would be like, "wtf, I was just trying to be nice, I have confidence in you/I'm telling the truth, it's a proven fact that you're remarkable, what's so bad about that?" Kind of like a, Seriously? I'd kill for people to admire me and have faith in me and actually say so, what kind of person is like, 'Hey, I don't like it when you do that.'? And also hurt because she's trying and doing things that are pretty foreign/unusual for her (being vulnerable and sincere, giving praise), so to be 'punished' for that would make her feel like withdrawing. So outwardly she'd be a bit put-off and shirty about it, like "Okay, sorry, I won't say it anymore." *obviously disgruntled, not gracious and understanding* But I think after calming down or hearing someone else advocate for MC (like Briony going, "Well, I get it... can you imagine if you felt this pressure to save the day every time? MC's just a person, after all..."), it would click for her, she'd feel a bit bad about it, but she wouldn't feel the need to pursue it or apologize further and would just comply with MC's wishes moving forward!
Briony: she'd pretty much be the same as Shery, writhing in guilt and feeling horrible that she didn't consider MC's feelings more, but after they talked about it and she profusely apologized the first time, she'd be able to move on so long as it didn't seem like MC held any hard feelings or awkwardness about it! Ultimately she'd be glad they said something and would be extra vigilant both about herself and about correcting others if they happen to say things like that around MC! Like she'd start feeling protective and maybe over-conscious of MC's feelings!
Lavinet: she would be similar to Riel: because she meant it as praise, she would be surprised to hear that they found it off-putting or intimidating, but she would simply apologize and then move on without doing it again; it wouldn't be something she really dwelled on unless it seemed like it was a really big deal to MC, in which case she might discuss it with them intermittently moving forward, wanting to understand the exact feelings and reasons behind their feelings and wanting to encourage them in resolving them!
Halek: he's pretty much in Tallys's camp: because of his position in life, he'd be more conscious of not saying stuff like this in the first place, because he understands the pressure those kinds of expectations come with, even if they're reverent and well-intentioned! If he slipped and said stuff like that as a joke, then was asked by MC not to say it, he'd apologize and commiserate with them, then keep it in mind moving forward, being careful not to do it again!
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pinksmonkey · 2 days
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Roblox Has A Problem
Hey everyone, sorry for the more serious post today, but I have an important issue I really need to talk about and bring attention to.
Recently when I was trying to upload one of my autistic pride designs to make a t-shirt on Roblox, I was sent a moderation warning saying this:
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(And this was the image I uploaded btw):
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Obviously I was annoyed and frustrated by this, so I contacted Roblox and sent an appeal message.
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Today I received a response from Roblox Support saying this:
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Does this action seem fair to you? Because it doesn't feel fair to me. I ranted to one of my autistic online friends about it after, where we discussed it in more detail and you can understand more of the context around why this is so messed up. (I got permission to share these screenshots.)
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I know Roblox moderation has never been great, it's always had its issues. But as annoying as that is, in this case I feel like it's crossed a line. This isn't just about Roblox either, this is about how society views autism and the lack of autism education in general. I'm not just upset because I can't post something on Roblox, I'm upset because my voice as an autistic person is being silenced while other products on that platform are clearly mocking autism, and I'm trying to teach people about us. This is completely unjustified, and it sets a scary precedent when marginalized groups get censored for talking about their own experiences. Yes, Roblox is for all ages, and we should keep conversations appropriate, absolutely. But autistic people's existence, disability in general, is not inappropriate, kids should be learning about it. We don't need to discuss eugenics and hate crimes towards disabled people on Roblox, of course not, but I should be able to mention my identity without fear of being punished.
Basically, censoring the word autistic doesn't protect autistic people from hate, bullying, and discrimination, that is still happening regardless. What it does do is make it harder for us to fight back and stand up for ourselves, teach people about the realities of autism and normalize us as human beings. It's doing more harm than good, and that's what I hope Roblox can start to realize.
If you agree with me and want to make a difference, please reblog this and share it as many places as you can. We need to send a message to Roblox, and show them that silencing autistic voices is not ok. Obviously, be civil and respectful though, I just want to have a peaceful conversation about this problem, and hopefully Roblox will care enough to hear us out.
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beyond-a-name · 2 days
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Polymour
I invented a word to describe someone you love
Polymour:
(noun) A person with whom you share a deep and intimate connection that is distinctly polyamorous and non-amatonormative; someone you love and share a relationship with, especially a relationship-anarchistic, non-romantic, and/or queerplatonic relationship
denotes love, significance, non-exclusivity, and a freedom from role-defined relationships
I think that practical use is the single best way to learn a new word, and certainly the best way to create one, so here's the gap in my life this word was made to fill.
So I've been in love with two people for a while, and we're all a-spec and very poly, and I'm very relationship anarchist. Relationship anarchy is in fact the only relationship model that makes any sense to me, that accurately works well with how I feel and doesn't feel like a trap, contract, or obligation.
I don't really like the word "partner", but these two people I loved and connected with, one of them did use the word partner and I wanted the validity of their other relationships. We will call this person MV.
The other person I connected with and loved, well they felt even more trapped by romance than I did, and it was clear we cared about each other very much, but "partner" was never going to be a word to enter their vocabulary, and I wanted to share in that too. We will call this person V.
So, I was MV's partner and V's friend, but to me, these felt the same. I loved them the same way, and our relationship structure was identical. They were (and are) both deeply important to me, but both words seemed insufficient. Speaking to anyone else, "partner" felt more obligatory than the way MV so freeingly used it, and "friend" sounded way more distant than the intimacy V put behind it. I didn't like either word, but more than anything, it hurt that I couldn't just say I loved them. It upset me that I loved them the same but our words were different.
What really sealed it was talking to a colleague about my two loves, I said MV was my partner and friend, and that V would never describe themself in those terms but that I loved them both the same. My colleague listened, and was happy for me, and it really seemed like they got it!
The next time I saw them, they had bought me two movie tickets, for me and my partner. It was sweet, but I could only think about how to upgrade the tickets to include all three of us, thinking those two would each go to Mv and V and I'd buy my own ticket to share treat them both to the movies and- And it hurt.
It was only a few days after that I invented this word in the shower. And it works so beautifully for us!!!!! V could relax because they knew that our love for them wasn't going to be the amatonormative trap we'd both suffered, and MV was just as relieved as I was to have a word that wasn't still so romancey and role-defined. We have a way to tell people that we're important to each other without worrying about those people's pressures or expectations, because well, we invented it.
Like everything good about relationship anarchy, instead of roles and contracts or hierarchy, we just get to focus on the love we feel.
When someone hasn't heard this word (because they obviously haven't), instead of managing someone else's baggage, we just get to teach them how we all love each other.
So it works well, for me and my polymours.... <3
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Hi!!! How can deductions be used in day to day life, or like, usefully? And how have you made useful deductions? Sorry if that made little sense
Hi! I see you sent this question in the past two days, i'll gladly answer it, but in case you send any other questions in the future and i don't answer them as quickly i'll inform you that usually all the questions of the week are collected in my inbox and you'd get your answer on a Monday (this week i had some scheduling problems so i pushed it to Wednesday), so if you don't get as quick an answer next time just wait for Monday!
Now, regarding your question! There's many ways deduction can be used in daily life, sometimes it even depends on what you do for a living. For example i know psychologists and other healthcare profesionals have to rely on non verbal communication and information they gather from observation, along with what they're told, since patients can't be relied upon to be transparent and honest all the time, or even know what information is releant to share. In this case deduction can be massively useful.
On a more general note, it depends a lot on the type of relationships you have, i know people who use deduction to interact with their friends, it allows them to know when they're feeling upset or worried, and about what, and act accordingly, all without needing to do more than just glance at them. I know people who use deduction to navigate social situations because they're not good at interacting with people and having the extra information deduction provides helps. Personally i'm someone that introduces deduction into everything i do, from acquiring helpful knowledge when talking to superiors, to knowing what waiter is best to call over at my table cause they've gotten more hours of sleep.
I recommend you watch Sherlock, House M.D., The Mentalist, and all of these deduction heavy shows that sometimes showcase how these characters use their skills casually, it's really not much different than what you see there. If you want a blog that really goes into casual uses of dedduction i'd check out @froogboi 's blog, it's full of everyday life uses of deduction
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thebirdandhersong · 6 months
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I think the problem. the problem is that I have always been afraid of not being invited into the inner circle. and am always wanting to be part of the inner circle. inner circle being the circle of love and companionship and communion. of course being a TCK and a bit of a sheltered homeschooled oddball child has nudged this further along over the years. but I didn't realise how STRONG that desire still burned. to actually be wanted.
#in other words today has been an oddly sad day! discovering that the friends you've made have their own group chats#that are separate from the general group chat (that no one ever talks on) that you aren't a part of is......... i don't know#i KNOW i'm liked by them and i KNOW they love me but do they WANT me around?#like. i know i'm not UNpleasant to have around. i am a good listener and a good conversationalist.#i work very hard at it because it doesn't come naturally to me.#but clearly that's not enough to be added to exclusive group chats! clearly that's not enough to be part of inner core circles#i don't know this just came out of nowhere and i feel as if i've been slapped in the face#sitting at a table where people are talking about the thing someone sent to the group chat#or the photo or quote or reel someone sent to someone else is....... bizarre.#i am trying not to be so hurt by it! i am trying not to take it so personally#it happens. i know it happens. i know it will keep happening. it is just that i thought this was a place where i wouldn't be lonely#and this is the dorm community i've invested so much of my time and energy and love into since last year.#so i think i'm justified in being a little upset!#i'm not crying about it but that's because i'm not about to cry with other people sitting here in the study lounge!#the math is probably really wrong here but i thought that if i poured love in for the sake of pouring love in#somehow somewhere along the line i would also receive love. that i would actually be a part of this community.#anyway that's not going to change how i live here! i committed myself to doing my best this last year#because i don't want anyone to feel left out or unwanted or lonely. i already made the decision#to do everything i can to love the people here.#i'm not trying to toot my horn this is just what i actually want to and have decided to do!#i have birthday cards planned! i have midterm snacks planned!#i've just worked out how i can print christmas and easter cards and stickers!#i'm GOING to love darn it all i'm GOING to pour love in#i think it hurts especially because there's the boy problem going on too#of not being wanted in an area that i DIDN'T expect to be wanted in#and then learning that there is a collective not being wanted in this whole community#it is a Lot and it is very hard and i don't know what to do with it!#i have had this lie (that i'm inherently unloveable and undesirable) in my head since childhood#and i've worked SO HARD to shut that voice up. and it is so so hard to not believe it right now
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galedinner · 7 months
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self ship please chill out challenge
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baejax-the-great · 3 months
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Hi, I saw on one of your ao3 comments that you think Homers' Achilles is on the spectrum. This is a really interesting idea to me, but I don't know that much about autism - could you elaborate on why you think that? (Also, I think all of your fics are amazing ☺️)
Autism as a word and diagnosis did not exist in ancient Greece, and I have no idea if there would have been a similar concept about it (doubt it) or if more likely people with certain autistic traits would have been considered to have a certain type of personality. So for me to say that Homer deliberately wrote Achilles as "autistic" is a little tongue in cheek.
That said, reading the Iliad I did have a moment of "Ohhhh, dude's autistic I get it." Some people might look at my reasoning and say, "well, that could be a whole other thing with these other reasons," and that's fair. This is just how it came across to me and why.
Sense of justice/fairness. This is one of the more obscure autistic traits (that often gets misunderstood and shit upon by people), but it's how the book begins, so I'll start here. Autistic people are more likely to learn and follow rules to a T. This gets rolled into the trait of "rigid thinking" and has been related to autistic people's preference for solid routines. To think about where you lie with this trait, one example is the "walk" signal at a crosswalk. Some people jaywalk when the road is very clear and no one is around. Some people jaywalk when the road ISN'T clear because they don't give a fuck. And some people will wait for that light to turn white no matter what because that's what you are supposed to do and there are rules (although culture/country of origin will also affect how much relevance traffic lights have in your life).
This is a rule, but it has little do to with justice. So to figure out where you stand in terms of justice sensitivity, another metric is how angry you feel when you watch someone cut in line and not get punished for it. Some of us will sigh and move on with our life because dicks are everywhere, whatever, and some people will have a harder time letting go because this person broke a rule in an obviously unfair way, and they should be punished for that.
This trait does not mean that autistic people have a better sense of what justice is or what rules/laws are "just." That is all very subjective. But this trait does result in a stronger negative reaction to seeing those rules/laws violated.
Such as rage.
Achilles fits the bill here in both in terms of rigid thinking and his sense of justice. His reputation in the Greek tradition is as someone who was very educated. In fact, he is the most educated with regards to law and religion than the rest of the Achaeans thanks to his time with Chiron. More than that, he actually cared about what he was taught and was considered kind of a stick-in-the-mud in terms of believing that the armies should follow the rules and customs of their people at all times and that violating their own laws was bad, even if you really, really wanted to bang a hot chick.
When Agamemnon decides to take Briseis, he is breaking a Rule. The common interpretation of what happens here is that he has violated Achilles' pride and honor in doing so, and Achilles loses his shit. That's valid. To me it read a little differently. I mean, for one, Achilles is 100% correct in the first book. Agamemnon pissed off the gods in a way he shouldn't have bringing plague on everyone, and how does he solve this? By agreeing to do the thing Achilles told him to do to solve it and then immediately violating their customs to steal from Achilles, bringing down a plague of "Achilles is not going to help you anymore."
Achilles cries to his mom that he wants the gods to fuck over the Greeks to prove Achilles right, which is deeply immature, but also really makes sense to me. Like, Agamemnon did this shitty, illegal, rules-breaking thing, and he needs to feel the consequences of that action. Achilles isn't a god who can bring down a plague, but his mommy is, so get fucked, Agamemnon. It's Zeus time.
During the time Achilles is out of the fighting, he is routinely called hard-hearted, stubborn, and other words to indicate he will not be swayed, which again speaks to his rigidity of understanding how things should be done.
The Way Achilles Talks About His Emotions. Achilles very clearly states what he is feeling throughout the book, and he often restates it. We get it, bro. You're mad. And then sad. Really, really sad. While this is almost definitely for the audience to understand his feelings and just how deep they run, Homer also could have just told us outright what he was thinking without having Achilles say it out loud repeatedly. It also felt to me that Achilles talks about his feelings far more often and bluntly than other characters do, but again this could be because the story revolves around his 'rage.'
Regardless, even if it was purely for audience benefit, this is a behavior I have noticed with my adult ND friends, which is basically after a childhood feeling confused by what other people around them are doing or why they are reacting to things in a certain way, they have a strategy of very bluntly expressing themselves and where they are at in this situation. It can be far easier than trying to follow the subtleties of NT culture and just get whatever issue it is out in the open. Saying to someone "I am angry at you" can come off as overly aggressive and blunt depending on context, but it cuts to the heart of the matter. We can compare this with Odysseus, who does not express any very deep emotions at all in the Iliad (other than the fact that Thersites should shut the fuck up, anyway), presumably because that's nobody else's business.
The Embassy. Achilles' point to Odysseus that this entire war was started over a man stealing a woman is so correct and so ignored. He looks at this situation and says: Paris stole Helen, and Agamemnon rallied all the Achaeans to come make war with Troy. Agamemnon steals Briseis, and I'm meant to... keep fighting for him? In what way does this make sense?
Everyone around him sees it from a completely different perspective, basically that Achilles got angry over a girl. To Achilles this is not what it is about at all. And I'm with him on this. If stealing a woman is a sin egregious enough for thousands of Greeks to spend 10 years attempting to sack a city, then it is the same amount of egregious for Agamemnon to take Briseis and he's lucky Achilles didn't kill him immediately and sack Argos. He's getting off easy, which Achilles tells him.
Reading Odysseus lay out his argument followed by Achilles cutting him down with that bit of logic was like, yeah, I'm with Achilles, I don't even think he's being stubborn I just think he's right.
In the embassy chapter, Achilles also has his famous line about despising men who say one thing but mean another. Being very truthful and having difficulty noticing lies is another common trait of autism, and it would make sense for Achilles to find the dishonesty of his colleagues deeply annoying.
Old British scholars called him a sociopath. This might seem like a weird one, but I'm adding it into evidence. When I read the Iliad, I see Achilles as a very emotional person. Given that half the book is about his grief over Patroclus, I find calling him incapable of caring about others incredibly bizarre. But in addition to determining that these scholars who wrote these batshit essays have never once in their life had a friend, much less a friend that they loved, this kind of fits with how a certain type of old-fashioned scholar understands autism. I've actually been at neuroscience talks with crusty old assholes who talk about how autistics and orphans are incapable of empathy, and then use evidence that really just says to me they express empathy in a different way. (Yes, orphans. For real. A real talk I went to in like 2015. Did you know that orphans don't have feelings and don't care about the feelings of others. /s) Add to the old British tradition of their feral private school kids (which I believe they call public school? idk those assholes in blazers, you know the ones) literally caning each other for being smaller, weaker, or just different, and this to me is solid evidence that Achilles is neurodivergent and unwittingly awoke the bloodlust in these old (dead) bastards.
Speech Patterns. Not being able to read Ancient Greek, I can't actually say much about this one, but multiple scholars have commented that the way Achilles speaks in the Iliad is different to all the others. He has a unique way of speaking. Again, this is not necessarily an autistic trait, but it is common for autistic people to have different speech patterns than NT people, so it's more just a "hmmm, maybe" than actual evidence.
I feel like I'm forgetting other little things, but I'd have to fully reread the Iliad with this in mind to jog my memory, and maybe one day I will. TLDR; Achilles has a very rigid way of thinking and an uncommon way of expressing his emotions.
And as always, autism is a spectrum. Anything I've written about here isn't necessarily true of any autistic person out in the world.
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steakout-05 · 3 months
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//ableism mention tw
ok just gonna say something really quick: i absolutely hate Abe's characterisation in the reboot of Clone High because it is nothing like how he acted in season 1 and it just. isn't funny. they've turned this good-intentioned but flawed loser kid who just wants to be like the original Abraham Lincoln but doesn't know how to, into a self-centered and arrogant asshole who literally almost said a horrible ableist slur twice in the first episode. like. i'm being serious, he almost says the R-slur twice in the same minute and i dunno about you but i really don't find it very funny when a) the only "joke" behind it is "oh look at how bad Abe is compared to the more progressive sensitivities of the new generation of clones, isn't he just terrible", and b) they felt the need to completely rewrite a pre-existing character that fans are already attached to to do something against his own morals for the sake of a shitty joke, and c) TOPHER WAS RIGHT THERE!!! isn't he supposed to be the asshole or am i missing something?? like...
i'm not saying you can't have "edgy" or "dark" comedy or whatever, but personally, i don't find it very funny when a character that actually means quite a lot to me and is one of my favourites is twisted and rewritten into an arrogant asshole in an apparent attempt to appeal to the people who hate Abe for his flaws in the original show. especially when he's rewritten to be someone who would say a slur that's literally been used against my fellow disabled peers, myself included. it just feels... wrong. it actually hurts a lot to see a character i once loved and found to be one of the funniest and most important characters in the show be turned into an arrogant dick, with barely any thought or meaning put into him. i don't like what they did with the rest of the OG cast as well (such as Joan making a complete 180 in her entire character, JFK's character assassination, the removal of Gandhi, Cleo barely being in it etc.), but to me, they did Abe the dirtiest in this season and i'm really disappointed that one of my favourite shows had to continue like this :(
#clone high#abe lincoln#rant#sorry this post is a little heavier than what i usually post on here but i just felt like i really needed to say this#abe from clone high is actually quite an important character to me and i'm still upset that he's been written so poorly in season 2#like he's a silly parody of a teen drama protag but honestly i think his struggles in the original series are actually really meaningful#like he's a little shy and doesn't exactly know how to express his ideas in the best way but wants to help and i just think that's so real#especially as someone who struggles with that myself#he has so much pressure to live up to the OG abraham lincoln and he really wants to be like him and tries but doesn't get it#i mean he even says something like that in episode 2 when joan and gandhi come to see him in his room and that's really relatable#so to see him so horribly misinterpreted as a selfish asshole really hurts me.#they've essentially done the thing where a fandom will tear apart the neurodivergent coded character#and write them off as selfish and arrogant and completely misinterpret everything about them#not saying that Abe is written to be neurodivergent but you get my point#it's kinda like that#he's relatable to me as an autistic person and a lot of his struggles are similar to what the autistic community experiences#also i'm sad that gandhi had to get removed because he's important to me too#he's actually one of my favourite ADHD reps on tv i've seen and he's just really funny#i know he was removed because people in India got offended and they probably don't wanna cause another incident like that again#but still it's such a shame he couldn't be included because he was a great character#also slightly unrelated but i think turning characters into a moral debate it stupid and often results in stuff like this happening#ableism mention#tw ableism mention
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cantstayawaycani · 8 months
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Personal...
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eveythemoth · 4 months
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One-word review of "Saltburn (2023)":
upsetting
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