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saleeba · 6 months

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fool ; jude bellingham

summary ♡ betting on the phenomenon of unrequited feelings, you and jude have never dared to make the first move with the other until a reunion forces new questions to be answered.

pairing ♡ jude bellingham x fem!reader

content ♡ 18+, smut, friends to lovers, alcohol consumption, cursing, kissing, both jude & reader are pining idiots, fingering, p in v sex, marking, missionary, unprotected sex (jude pulls out but still pls practise safe sex!!)

a/n ♡ she's baaaack :D but first☝🏽alexa play fool by nct 127 !!!! the lyric "you’re a goddess but i’m a fool, what should i do?" was written for this fic in particular i just know it was :] anyway hehe this fic is based off this request so tysmm to anon for sending such an exciting prompt !! i hope yous enjoy 🫶🏽💗 WAIT P.S this isn’t proofread bc i lowkey am not rocking with it so i didn’t wanna put myself thru having to read it again & again … im sorry for any mistakes :’)

you had just gotten off work to a stream of relentless texts from your best friends’ groupchat — phone pinging off the rails whilst you were on shift, muffled buzzes from your bag making you wonder what on earth was worth blowing up in that whatsapp group on a random friday afternoon.

on the train back home, you tap open the green app, anticipating yourself easily spending the entire journey catching up on the three hundred-plus texts from your closest mates. you decide to start right from the beginning of the influx, thumb scrolling nonstop and eyes blurring from the rapid movement until they focus back on the screen where you stop, finally having reached the destination of the first text that set it all off.

it was from none other than jude bellingham, and you were nearly embarrassed by the way your face instantly lit up upon reading his message. the groupchat’s golden boy had popped up after weeks of minimal contact, asking if he could take everyone for a night out tomorrow to make up for it, stating that he finally has some small gaps of free time between hectic pre-season schedules to allow him to do so.

it honestly warmed your heart that the first thing he wants away from football is to see you all. you’d been a band of good friends since the first year of secondary school, contact not necessarily strained as you all had a lot of love for each other but rather unspokenly reduced after leaving school two years ago and falling into busy university or career ventures.

instead of scrolling through to read and react to the plethora of follow-up texts after his, you ignore them and jump straight to typing your reply to his invitation, casting aside that nagging voice asking you: doesn’t that seem too desperate?

no, right? i’m just accepting his invitation, getting straight to the point, the convo ended half an hour ago anyway. you’re arguing with yourself now, feeling the need to give unnecessary excuses to nonexistent accusations. if you were to be honest with yourself, you were always self-conscious of the way you behaved around jude, even now debating on whether to add your signature heart emoji or if it’d come across as you trying too hard given your feelings for him; albeit them being feelings that no one knows about, not even him. you made sure for it to be that way.

with a mental note to get over yourself, you send an affirmative ‘i’m up for it!’, signature heart included, and quickly shut off your phone. heart beating so rapidly, you scolded yourself for getting so worked up over a mere reply and for definitely not getting over yourself. god knows how you’re going to handle seeing him in person.

a sudden double buzz from your device does nothing to calm you down, instead dampening your hands with sweat when you grab it and see a pair of messages from him.

jude 🌟: heyy i’m so glad you can make it tomorrow :)

jude 🌟: can’t wait to see you!! ❤❤

he had messaged you separately for some reason and he had included two hearts… the overthinking starts for you again, without even beginning to think about what to reply this time, and you question why he couldn’t have just replied to you in the groupchat or why he couldn’t have just left the end of the messages with a ‘x’ like he usually does or why he would even say what he said in the last message. mind frantic and unable to clear itself, you thank yourself for having your read receipts turned off so you can have your mini meltdown without worrying about jude knowing you’d seen his messages multiple minutes ago. god, you were down so bad.

you force yourself to open the messages app and send the most casual reply you can type.

you: can’t wait to see you too! ❤

you try to keep it short, sweet and nonchalant even if your fingers are itching to type more – more about how much you had missed him, more about what he was planning to wear tomorrow night so that maybe you could match your own outfit with him, more about your true, unfiltered feelings for him. it’s pathetic really; you hadn’t seen him in two years and the first thing you wanted to do was throw yourself at him, spilling all the secrets you’d been holding close for so many years. you leave it at that, put your phone on do not disturb mode and head on home, waiting for the long hours of friday evening to pass and saturday night to arrive.

***

and so saturday night rolls around and you just about finish touching up your makeup and smoothing out your dark blue dress before the doorbell rings, and you’re whisked away to the club by a couple of your girlfriends.

as soon as you step your high heels into the building, you’re met with the sight of flowing booze and the noise of noughties r&b beats bouncing around the brightly lit walls. dragged by the hands of your friends, you find yourself standing next to a booth at the back of the club, the rest of the group now welcoming you latecomers with a loud cheer.

“finally, girls. you took your time!” one of your male friends remarks, ushering you all to sit down.

“oh god, what have we missed?” you beam, trying to scan the group amongst the strobing lights to catch a glimpse of the person you were really there for.

“nah, you’re just in time because… first round’s on mister madrid!”

the callout breaks your friend group into a raucous holler as your gaze fixes onto the six foot-one footballer who stands up with an amused grin and a sigh of feigned defeat. your heart quickens and your smile turns into a state of near disbelief over how good jude looks right now – graphic white t-shirt hugging his biceps in all the right places and hanging over a pair of smart-casual black trousers.

“yeah, yeah, anything for my groupies,” he winks at no one in particular but your brain almost convinces you that he was looking at you while doing it. you send a shy smile his way just in case but what he says next has your mouth running dry. “help us out, will ya, y/n?”

you hesitate for a second too long for your liking, stumbling over your words while your friends peer at you. “uh… uh-huh, yeah, of course.” you answer as quick as you can, standing up on your feet slowly as to not trip over your now-shaking legs and send yourself flying into jude, and to avoid embarrassing yourself more than you think you already have.

he responds with a grateful smile and you follow him to the bar where he places an order for a round of drinks and some shots to be delivered to the group by the two of you. there’s an odd unfamiliarity to the silence between you both and you realise that you aren’t normally this quiet around jude, and neither is he around you; you would always joke that he’d be eligible to talk for england if he wasn’t already playing football for them. he’d retort with a comment about how his ears could almost fall off with the amount of chatting you do, and you’d dryly reply with a ‘well, they’re too big for your head anyway. look at the size of them!’ the pair of you were always as thick as thieves in the eyes of everyone else. which is why you didn’t expect it to be like this, especially after two years of not seeing each other – there was so much you wanted to catch up on from his world and so much you wanted to share from yours. you decidedly gain some courage and take the initiative to spark some conversation, get something going at least.

“soo, how have you been, then?” you’re both facing the bar, your head barely tilting in jude’s direction to indicate that yes, it is him that you’re talking to and not some random like he assumes you are with the way you’re positioned away from him, eyes just about turning to steal a glance of his figure but not to hold eye contact. “how’s la vida española?”

jude finds amusement in your sudden flaunt of the spanish language, a smile breaking out on his face, unseen to you since he’s still facing the same direction that you are, preoccupying his eyes with the myriad of bottles on the shelves while his mind searches for an apt reply.

“yeah, it’s been great, i think i wanna stay there forever,” jude laughs, his fingers tapping on the black surface of the bar. you can’t help the selfish feeling of your heart dropping at his confession. “i miss you, though, y’know… a lot.”

this one confession forces your whole body to turn itself towards him, eyes now chasing after his to seek some form of sincerity, to see if he was just messing about or if he really meant what he just said. he shifts his head to face you now, a bashful look painted onto his features. the expectant silence says it all really; of course i mean it.

you gulp and decide to break the quietness with a sarcastic, jesting “ugh…”, jude’s face dropping at what he thinks is genuine disgust from you. you realise your attempt to denounce the awkwardness has backfired.

“oh my god, you dickhead, i’m joking,” how is it that mere moments ago you were shaking at the sheer real-life presence of him but now you’d transformed into having this confident playfulness? and all of it without a drop of alcohol in your system as well – you’re quietly proud of yourself. “i missed you too, jude… a lot.” you coyly repeat his words.

upon your turn of the confession, the bartender sets down your drink orders and the two of you wordlessly carry the trays over to where your friends are situated, the silence way more comfortable now that you’re both basking in assurance, unbeknown to the other that your hearts were racing at a hundred miles per hour.

***

not even two hours and an innumerable amount of shots later, you’re all a drunken mess; definitely not a surprise to a single one of you. what is a surprise is the way you’re strewn across jude, right leg wrapped around his left, head on his chest, swirling and sipping from what’s clearly an empty glass to any sober, sane person. you grumble and mutter a complaint about the lack of liquor in the booth, taking it upon yourself to head to the bar and order another round for everyone.

“i’ll come with you,” jude announces over the pounding of the music, standing up so quickly that his next five steps are staggered and he has to cling onto your arm to steady himself. “i’m fine, i’m okay.” he assures nobody that asked.

the two of you stumble your way into the path of the bar, determined to drink until the sun comes up and forget every strand of stress until the hangovers come knocking. jude’s soft grip on your arm has you being led in the opposite direction all of a sudden, though.

“uhm, where are we going?” you question, head still turned to where the bar is located, about to ask him if he was so hammered he couldn’t walk in a simple straight line to get to where you’d planned to go. “jude?”

he’s silent, save for humming his way to his desired destination, and you question if he even knows where he’s leading you. before you make the choice of going along with him or leaving his clearly confused self to go cop your next cocktail, you find yourself in the disabled toilets, pushed up against the sink with the door not even shut properly, gasping at how rough jude is handling your body compared to his soft touches from before, and how close his face is to yours, warm breath fanning the skin of your lips. you weren’t strictly against it all but how the hell have you ended up like this? The alcohol and the questions come at you fast, dizzying your brain but you can’t help but feel so keenly anticipative.

“i’m sorry, i just…” he pulls away from you, eyes fluttering closed so he can re-evaluate his actions, exhaling through his nose as if he was letting go of all doubts before continuing. “am i okay to do this?” he places his hands on your waist, pushing himself back into your space, his full lips more or less about to take yours. you have to refrain from letting the effects of alcohol take over your tongue and uttering back with a breathy ‘you can do whatever you want to me’.

instead, you answer with an earnest, eager nod, inviting his lips to finally do that one thing you had been dreaming of for so long, to kiss yours so silly that they’re left with the imprint of him. and jude does just that.

his mouth takes in yours so determinedly, shyness and hesitation now long-dissolved feelings for you both as your hands find home around the back of his neck, pushing his head further onto you, feeling the need to taste him more and more until you’re both consumed by each other.

it’s a messy makeout, noses bumping and teeth clashing, but it’s oh so hot, the way he gasps into your mouth from breathlessness and pleasure, running and gripping his large hands over the material adorning your waist and hips as the need to rip it off you nearly overtakes him. to you, he’s so utterly intoxicating that a gallon of alcohol would pale in comparison to how dizzy his skin on yours makes you feel.

you release a moan at the meagre thought of jude all over your body, and he takes the opportunity to slip his tongue over yours, filthy noises of wetness and carnality from the both of you reaching high pitch as jude somehow simultaneously pushes you against the sink and pulls you against his chest, his manhandling of you getting you even more hot and bothered before you’re both interrupted by the hub of people passing by and huddling right outside the bathroom, their self-occupied shouts and cheers dragging you out of the bubble that the two of you had wrapped yourselves in, almost sobering you up on the spot.

you push jude out of your way, gentle but abrupt, and give him a look of apologetic regret. “i-i’m sorry,” you say, jitterily walking past him and exiting the room without a second glance or word, heading straight to the booth where your friends are hollering and hurraying, occupied with shot-drinking contests.

your girlfriends offer to go home with you when you lie and tell them you’re not feeling very well, but you decline them, instead telling them to have fun on your behalf and letting them know that you’ll try to text them once you get home safely. you can tell they’re confused by your shaken state and the absence of jude but you grab your bag and make your exit before the interrogation can even begin to brew.

you manage to grab a taxi back home, surprised by how competent you are despite the alcohol in your bloodstream and confusion in your brain. on the way there, you can’t stop the bouncing of your knee nor the racing of your psyche, asking yourself how and why whatever went down with jude went down like that. you curse at yourself for being so impulsive in starting and finishing the whole ordeal with him in the way that you did – you don’t know if it’s the empty, depressive drunk thoughts or just clarity from the whole jude thing that makes you feel like there’s no coming back from this at all. you feel like crawling into your bed and never coming out from it ever again.

the taxi driver has to call for your attention multiple times until you reach earth again and pay him the journey’s fee. you go skulking all the way up to your front door, only letting out a breath that you feel like you’ve been holding since the beginning of the night once the door shuts behind you.

the rest of the night is quiet and orderly for you, telling yourself to not invite any more chaos into your brain and to simply drink some water and to go to sleep. waking up tomorrow morning is going to be painful in more ways than one.

***

you spend the rest of the weekend nursing a ferocious hangover and a frazzled heart, only contacting your friends to tell them that you got home fine and to joke that you probably need a century or two for this hangover to be gone. you thank the high heavens that they don't bring up the topic of you and jude

you try not to think too much about jude, you really do, but sunday night has a couple of taps landing you on the instagram app and you learn that he’s already back in spain, pictures of him in training sliding across your phone screen on his story along with selfies with his teammates. usually, you tap that small red heart at the bottom and hope that he sees it amongst his millions and millions of notifications, a tiny ritual of yours that now has you feeling so pathetic that you don’t dare to do it anymore.

running a hand over your weary face, you set your phone down and opt to nap the night away, finding comfort in the non-intrusion from your friends and the no contact from jude, hoping to keep yourself busy and distracted with whatever the work week brings.

a ring from the doorbell rips through your flat just as you’re organising your pillows, forcing you to stop what you’re doing and ponder who could be at the door on a sunday while the clock ticks some minutes past one o’clock. you don’t recollect ordering any food nor are you expecting a delivery, especially not this late.

trudging your way to the front door, you open it to find jude bellingham standing there and you feel an instant pang of regret, wishing you had peeked through the window to see who it could be, wishing you had pretended to not be in, wishing the ground would open up right now and swallow you whole – anything to escape the confrontation that you’re now having to face. your face heats up with embarrassment and nerves but you manage to rupture the silence before your mouth can turn dry.

“j-jude, hi,” you try and keep your greeting as polite and cordial as you can, even when all you really want to do is to chase him off your doorstep. “what are you doing here?”

your query has jude visibly gulping, hands fiddling with each other as he attempts to hold eye contact with you, his vision a bit blurry from exhaustion. “y/n… sorry, can i come in?”

you oblige, holding the door open wide before you guide him to the living room and invite him to sit down on the plushness of your sofa, settling yourself on the opposite end of it. you silently prompt him to say what he came here to say with a nod of your head.

“uhm, i’m sorry for turning up unannounced, and so late…” ever the courteous. “i had to sneak away from the lads and catch the last flight to here so it was all a bit down to the wire.” he lets out a small, uneasy laugh.

you cut off his rambling with a curt “what do you want, jude?” you don’t mean for it to sound so rude but you still hold the attitude of wanting to get this over and done with, already feeling annoyance at yourself for even letting him into your home.

“right, yeah, i actually wanted to talk about what happened on saturday,” he goes back to fiddling with this thumbs, eyebrows furrowed but he avoids looking at you this time. not that you can blame him because your own vision shifts to anywhere but his direction. “i’m so sorry for making you uncomfortable a-and please tell me if this is inappropriate, but i haven’t stopped thinking about last night, i haven't stopped thinking about you, i-i’m sorry, i know this is all so silly and you probably don’t even feel the same bu-”

you stop him right there, this time with good reason as you can’t bear holding back your real emotions, not when he’s practically given you the green light to spill the contents of your heart.

“no, jude, i didn’t feel uncomfortable at all,” you assure him, gaze now on the footballer in front of you and you almost can’t believe the words leaving your mouth right now. “i wanted it to happen, i’m glad it happened, you know, i think i’ve had dreams about it happening,” you try and offset any tension with a timid chuckle before turning quite pensive. “i really like you, jude, i have for a long time… god, sorry, this is so embarrassing.” you return to making light of the situation you’ve put yourself in, the timidness sinking back in as quick as the relief lifts you up.

jude moves closer to your now-cowering body, knees touching as your heartbeat surges with worry and self-consciousness all wrapped up into a tight, miserable ball. he puts his sweat-dampened hands into yours and squeezes in silent assurance before raising them up to his lips and laying a chaste kiss on the heated skin.

he can’t help but break out into a sweet smile, eyes threatening to crinkle at the edges. your face is still sketched with tension and now confusion has joined the mix.

“i can’t tell you how long i’ve waited to hear that from you, how much i needed to hear it,” your eyes meet his, widening in surprise a little. “i’m a fool for not telling you sooner… i like you, y/n, i really like you.” he repeats your own words back at you, leaning in with a smattering of amusement dancing in his vision.

“can i kiss you?” the question leaves your lips faster than you can even process it in your brain.

jude wastes no time in replying with a firm pressing of his mouth on yours, deepening it within seconds, the need to cement his feelings for you being told through the way he cradles your head in his hand, leaning you back onto the arm of the sofa to further intensify the kiss. your lips move along with his, the soft weight of his body pressed against yours making you whine into his mouth in ecstasy.

he lifts off of you with a puckering of his swollen lips, the both of you taking the chance to draw in some air and attempt to regulate your breathing pattern.

“please take me to the bedroom,” you beg, breathless from the sheer sight of his dark eyes and pretty pout. there’s no fight nor denial from jude as he picks you up and prompts you to wrap your legs around his waist, quickening his pace once you point in the direction of your room.

he lays you down on the bed so gently, lips latching onto yours once again before they travel down your jaw and over the warm skin of your neck. the light touch of his fluttering eyelashes married with the pressure of his soft lips has your head spinning, hands tentatively laid on top of your sheets since you don’t trust yourself to not grab his head and bring it back to your lips. his fingers tinker with the waistband of your pyjama trousers, stretching it off your skin before he asks permission to peel them down your legs.

once they’re cast away in some corner of your bedroom, jude divides your legs by the underside of your knees, tucking himself into the now available space between them, turning onto his side and resting on his left forearm. he leaves a small kiss over your covered cunt and you try your best to not just clamp his head in between your thighs and smother him with your growing wetness here and now.

“need to get you ready, baby,” the sudden mention of the petname has you throbbing, squirming even more when he traces a line from your clit down to where there’s a small damp spot forming on the dark material of your underwear.

“jude, please,” you whine out, lifting your hips in a desperate bid to get the boy to strip your lower half completely.

he shushes you in his own charming way, making sure to comply with your demand by getting up onto his knees and discarding your soaked panties in a matter of seconds, the cold air generated by his large hands whipping them off you hits your exposed pussy, making you hiss through gritted teeth.

jude returns to the gap between your spread legs, sitting back but still on his knees, his higher position causing you to shift onto resting your body weight on the palms of your hands in order to peer at his actions – which start with him re-tracing that same teasing line from your aching clit to your hole with his thumb, the feeling now so intense on your unclothed skin. he hums in what sounds to be satisfaction when you throw your head back in pleasure, taking it in his favour to slip his index finger into the tightness of your pussy.

you release a guttural groan at the feeling of finally having some part of him inside you; you of course don’t want this to be the only part but you’re still so very grateful, so fucking grateful he’s now rubbing at your clit in delicious rounds, thumb tracing circle after circle while his fingers form a pair, pistoning in and out of you so easily due to the way your cunt douses itself with every move of jude’s.

“fuck, baby,” jude moans at the sight of his soaked digits every time they barely pull out of that pretty pussy, his thumb torturing your sensitive bud increasingly so, the cries and whimpers spilling from your lips an incentive for him. “feel so good and tight around my fingers, can’t imagine how you’ll feel around my dick.”

his words have you absolutely reeling, writhing against his hand to try and chase that moment of release.

“please, jude, i’m so close,” you’re warning and demanding at the same time, almost begging him to not stop or even think about moving his fingers out of you. “god, please, i need it,”

jude suddenly retracts both of his hands, leaving you bare and empty. “no way, baby, need to have you cumming on my cock or not cumming at all,” he comments with a shake of his head, denying you the opportunity of leaking your cum over his hand. upon seeing your bewildered face, he makes up for it by putting on a show of licking your juices clean off his fingers, the digits popped inside his mouth and dragged right back out with a low moan, him praising the way you taste.

“move up the bed for me, angel,” he orders, watching you while he stands up and unclothes himself as quick as he can. you scoot backwards, legs still spread open like they’ve been locked in that position, before pulling your oversized t-shirt off of you, chest void of a restricting bra . “good girl,” he praises, crawling up to hover his body over your laying one, cock in hand as your legs come to wrap around him. “are you still okay with this? we can stop at any point, okay?”

the sincerity of his voice has you melting. some would remark that the bar is in hell for you but the truth is that you hadn’t been with anyone like this for more months than you could count on your hands. you've been touch-starved and lacking words of affirmation for so long, and you needed something to be only about you for once.

“i’m more than okay with this,” you smile up at him, nodding to make your approval fully known. “and yes, i know i can stop you if i need to.”

jude reciprocates the same smile before leaning in and smothering your lips with his, pushing his cock into your tight wetness, so tight that your pussy almost pushes him back out, not used to being penetrated by something so thick.

“oh my god!” the feeling of tightness/fullness has you both gasping out the same thing at the same time, erupting into quiet giggles when the two of you realise your matching reactions.

jude’s mouth finds its way back home in the embrace of your lips and you swear this is heaven, the way his cock slides in and out of your sopping cunt, set at such a perfect pace, the slight friction causing you to grow even wetter – the filth of it all contrasts so well with the sweetness of his muffled moans and tender kisses on your neck, moving down onto your collarbones and tits.

a particularly harsh thrust of his cock has your back arching, chest pushed up to his heated face, and he takes this golden opportunity to wrap his lips around your erect nipple, spending a good while sucking and tugging on the skin around it. you’re amazed at how his cock doesn’t relent inside you, the speed still so quick and consistent even when he’s so occupied in painting splotches on your tits with his mouth.

“there,” he pants out, pulling his head back and marvelling at his own creation. “now, there’s no doubt that you’re really mine.” the smile he gives you is a killer.

you whine at his declaration of you belonging to him, scratching at his shoulders and calling out his name to indicate that it’s all too much for you, that you’re so, so close to cumming on his cock and really giving him what he wants rather than pleasing yourself. you figure that’s you gone now; you’re more willing to put the boy above your own needs because you’re down that fucking bad for him.

“fuck, jude, i’m gonna cum!” you sob, your moans becoming more frequent and higher pitched, legs starting to shake from the intoxicating mix of exhaustion and delight. you’re frantically chanting “please, please, please” into his mouth which parts to swallow your whimpering, wet lips kissing your trembling ones.

“go on, baby, cum for me, cum all over this cock,” he groans out, eyes squeezing shut when the feeling of your pussy clamping down tightly on his thickness proves too much to handle, face finding refuge in the crook of your neck. he knows you don’t need his permission, he would’ve let you orgasm as many times as you wanted to, would’ve let you use him like your own personal sex toy, but the words were only there to keep you going when his hips felt like faltering – he needed you cumming on his cock like he promised before, and he wasn’t about to fuck it up himself.

a final scream rips from your throat as you cum hard around jude, pussy clenching and pulsating around his cock so sporadically you thought you were having two orgasms at once. jude can’t handle it anymore, pulling out with a myriad of moans as he pumps his shaft with a hand, decorating the expanse of your lower abdomen with warm, white liquid. you’re still squirming, slowly trying to wheeze out the remaining whimpers from your lungs which you’re finding hard to do with the way jude pants and moans above you, the boy so spent he can’t help but breathe like he hasn’t had access to air for the past hour.

he flops down by your side, arms and legs sprawled like a starfish, chest rising and falling as he attempts to recuperate from the mindblowing sex you two just had. the image is so unserious that you can’t stifle your giggles but you decide to take another step of courage to lay on your side resting your head on his shoulder, fingers stroking his abs and playing with the curly hairs of his happy trail.

the room is quiet now with the scent of sex wafting through your nostrils on occasion but it’s the most comfortable silence you’ve experienced with jude, the feeling of his hot skin on yours so soothing to you.

after a period of panting, jude clears his throat and your ears prick up at the presence of sound. he turns his head towards you and you lift yourself up and off him out of instinct – you want full attention on him.

“i don’t want this to be a one-time kinda thing, y’know,” he proclaims, biting his lip from saying too much in one go.

“what, is this your way of saying you want round two already?” you joke, nose crinkling at the way he rolls his eyes playfully.

“shut up,” he delivers a poke to your side. “i mean, well, i don’t want either one of us to see this as a spur-of-the-moment thing, i just…” you look at him expectantly, silently telling him to continue. “i want you to be my girlfriend, y/n.”

you’re nearly knocked back by his words, wondering if they’re real or if you’re simply just hearing things. you thought dialogue like that, coming from him, was only reserved for your imagination, kept secret and only spoken to you in late-night mental scenarios that would comfort you on your way to slumberland.

you let out a laugh that’s an odd mix of relief and disbelief, quickly replying “yes, yes, of course” to his awaiting face, which releases a look of relief itself before jude captures your lips with such passion you’re both knocked back onto the plush pillows, giggling into each other’s mouths until your hands find themselves running down the defined muscles of his abdomen and over his hardening cock.

#girlies i’ve never had alcohol in my life so i hope the way i wrote reader & jude being drunk was ok !!! 🫶🏽#then again i’ve never had sex in my life and i write extensively about it so u know . 😭😭😭#guys imagine if before every smut fic i wrote a disclaimer like ‘guys i-i’ve never had sex before but i hope i did okay with this 🥺🥺' LMAO #ALSO omg im sorry abt the inconsistencies in tone + tempo i legit wrote this over a 5 month period + came back to it at times when i didnt #feel like writing + i was just tryna get to the good bit iykwim ( ͡ ° ͜ʖ ͡ °)#˗ˏˋ 📝 ˎˊ˗#˗ˏˋ 💬 ˎˊ˗#jude bellingham #jude bellingham smut #jude bellingham imagine #jude bellingham x fem!reader #jude bellingham x reader #jude bellingham x you #jude bellingham x y/n #football imagine #footballer smut #footballer imagine

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lani-heart · 5 days

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|| series masterlist || next // previously

parings -> ( eventually ) enhypen x reader genre -> soulmate au, fantasy au, angst warnings -> angst, self-harm word count -> 1.5k

abstract -> "i'm not a monster"

y/n’s perspective

I don't understand why Jake would want to know how it feels. Seeing someone hurt should give him an idea… He even wanted to keep it a secret, but why?

I wonder if K already gave it to him… if he drank it knowing what it was.

“Why are you so lost in your own head love?” I heard and smiled. “Just tired, Won,” I said and he chuckled. “Too tired even for me?” he teased and I smiled at him. He really was the best. “No, never for any of you,” I said and he smiled while kissing my forehead.

“Jay is busy today, so he wanted me to tell you to eat at the cafeteria today,” he said and I nodded. “Are you gonna join me?” I asked and he chuckled. “I would, but I need to get my dinner at the cafeteria so I’d rather not let you wait,” he said and I nodded.

It's been a while since I've eaten dinner by myself. Eunchae and Wonyoung are busy with after-school activities today. “Don’t miss me too much,” he said while speeding away.

I packed up my stuff and decided to go to the cafeteria.

While we could make our own food and eat at the cafeteria, we couldn’t get other foods made for different species. That's a concrete rule… humans have a specific process of checking food, it's quite similar to witches but our food has more nutrients for our energy in magic. Whilst werewolves consisted of a lot of meat… sometimes rare. Of course, vampires have blood bags and blood-infused food.

Wait… if Jay was busy today, what was Jake gonna eat?

“I need help” I heard and I immediately got scared of the man behind me… speaking of the devil. “I know it's not your ideal way to spend the end of the day, but if I can't stomach a blood bag I won't be able to eat any of the cafeteria food,” he said and I nodded.

“Why don’t you go into the city?” I asked and he shook his head. “The humans know I'm a vampire… It's on my uniform. They'll refuse to serve me. Why would a vampire go to a human-owned restaurant alone?” he asked and he proved a point. There was a lot of fear when it came to humans… some trusted witches and werewolves but when it came to other supernatural creatures like vampires… not so much.

“Well… I could go with you? We could go to the witch area, there's food you can eat as a human '' I said and his eyes lit up and he grabbed my shoulders making me freeze. “Thank you! You’re a lifesaver!” he said as he let me go… I tried to calm down my over beating heart, but it wasn’t like he could hear it with the effects of the potion.

“Do you need time to get ready?” I asked and he shook his head. “No… I just want food” he said and I understood he must be feeling an overwhelming amount of saturation.

“Lets go wait for the bus then”

jake’s perspective

I was happy she was true to her word and was willing to help me.

We finally got out of the bus that took us to the nearest city. It had a lot of different species-owned shops and restaurants. While shops were okay, restaurants were hard since vampires primarily drink blood scaring humans when they go in saying they're hungry.

“This is a human and witch-infused place. I hope you can find something you can eat” she said and I nod hoping it was true. “Jake?” I heard and I saw a she-devil. I hid behind y/n who looked at me confused.

“Jake, you should not be hiding behind the poor girl” she scolded and she smiled at the y/n who put her hand out. “Hello, if you know Jake you must know my brother Heeseung '' she said and I could see the shocked expression on her face. “I’m sorry for those idiots, they’ve always been that way,” she said and I scoffed.

“But you’re a witch and Heeseung–” “Is a vampire? The only vampires born from them are Sunghoon, Jake, and Niki the rest were turned. Heeseung was actually a witch” she explained.

“That's a long story though!” she said and I scoffed…

“Oh, it's nice to meet you,” she said, causing the she-devil to smile. “Be careful, Jake. Being human is a lot harder than you think” she said, seeing right through me. “How’d you know?” I asked as I stopped hiding. “I’m a witch… of course, I'd know, '' she said. “Besides any idiot could feel the magic radiating off of you” I heard as I now saw Vernon-hyung. “Oh, uhm she’s actually in HYBE Academy '' I explained and her eyes lit up. “I want to go into HYBE Academy when I graduate!” she said with an excitement I hadn't seen before.

“Oh? Maybe you’ll be my junior!” she said and y/n smiled. “We should get going now, your mates are waiting for you” I heard as I saw Jeonghan also.

“Mates? I didn’t know you found your mates yet?!” I said and she chuckled. “Neither do they,” she said and I should've guessed. From what Heeseung explained she knew who her mates were before even meeting them.

“Bye! I would love to see you again y/n!” she said as she left. “I didn’t know he had a sister, '' she said and I nodded. “She’s evil,” I said and she laughed. “She seems nice…” she said and I nodded. “Nicer than Heeseung at least but those two are the worst. Now can we order?” I asked and her eyes widened.

“Oh! You’re right, uhm here” she said while showing me the menu. “Oh, Rabokki sounds good!” I said and she smiled. “Let's go order then,” she said and I put down the menu as we got in line. “Are you not gonna get anything?” I asked and she hummed. “I was thinking of getting the same thing actually,” she said and I chuckled. “We could just order a big one and share?” I suggested. “Are you sure?” she asked and I nodded.

“I’ll pay by the way… as a thank you for doing this for me”

y/n’s perspective

My time with Jake was… nice.

He was actually really funny and sweet so I felt comfortable around him. Even meeting Heeseung’s sister was shocking, but the evening was good despite my other soulmates being busy.

“I’m so full!” he said as he yawned. “Why am I so sleepy?” he asked and I chuckled. “Because human food fills you so much that it just makes you tired. Unlike other species they don’t use anything to give extra energy to their food” I explained and he nodded.

“Being a human… it's weird” he said and I was curious. “How does being a witch feel?” he asked, making me laugh. “I know it sounds weird,” he mutters softly with a smile. He was...

No, he likes Sooha, not me.

“Well, I almost have excessive energy that I need to release. Witches need to do magic to not only be healthy but practice” I explained and he nodded.

“Vampires just have an excessive thirst,” he said and I nodded. “Does it make you uncomfortable with… you know eating with your mates?” he asked and I shook my head.

“It's a natural thing, none of it bothers me,” I said and he nodded. “Being around you… is overwhelming” he said and it confused me. “Not right now! Just… as a vampire. I’m not the best with control so you constantly smell like blood” he said and I felt my eyes widen in shock.

“I need to work on my control… control plus heavy emotions lead me to do horrible things. I’m sorry for that” he explained and I now knew it wasn’t really his fault.

He probably was defending Sooha… but he didn’t mean to hurt me. “I still don’t know how it feels to be hurt. But I wanted to explain that” he said and I nodded. “Sorry for not hearing you out,” I said and he shook his head.

“I don’t blame you”

jake’s perspective

I dropped her off at her dorm when I left the school again. I went to the plains to test it out.

I took a deep breath and summoned my fire. It was warm… then it turned hot and then turned unbearable. I couldn’t even control the scream that I let out.

“That pain you feel right now… remember it. It was only a fraction of what you did to her” I heard as I saw Heeseung? “Asking her for a potion to make yourself human? What were you thinking?” he asked as I could only feel my vision get blurry.

The burns hurt… the smell of burning flesh even made me gag.

“You’ve hurt countless people, you're under a rehabilitation program Jake. You're supposed to learn not to be a monster and yet you do monstrous things” he said and it was true.

There were vampires like him… who were made and are taught how to control whilst there's one like me who has killed and needed to be taught morals.

“I get it… I’m still a monster”

taglist -> @sunus-sun @loumin908 @on-1ce @shinkenprincess-oh @b-a-nshee-blog @bnnyniky @sakuxxi @chiiiiiiiiis @cncreams @pre1ttyies @justanunstablefrog @graythecoffeebean @starzniiky @singlepringle4you @chirokookie @kthstrawberryshortcake-main @imtoanonymousforyou @lovgfrd @ilovecheese09 @sousydive @pink-but-rosie @kyleebob @jihyosgf @in-somnias-world @jilxxasu @bee-the-loser @mitchikeli @cyberpunksunwoo @lhspeachie @loafsunshinesworld @vixensss @zhenya109 @luumiinaa @rosas-in-the-garden @b3tt7boop @moony-mari @vixialuvs @ilovecheese09 @capri-cuntz

please don't be a silent reader !! reblog, comment, and like <3

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thenyoumightaswellwrestleangels · 6 months

Text

I'm not me anymore (and maybe you're not you)

love is not designed for the cynical - series masterlist here

pairing: jason todd x reader (gender neutral)

length: 1.6k

genre: hurt/comfort, angst (happy ending)

warnings: reader is almost mugged and has zero self-preservation instincts but everything works out, jason doesn't know how to handle being in love, lots of talk of reader grieving jason after his death but it's fine because he's back, reader is vaguely / generally physically unwell

a/n: is this too similar to my dick grayson story? probably but we'll all just have to deal with that, tell me you still like it or I'll cry

It's late - too late for someone like you to be outside in Gotham. But sleep was hard to come by for you and working through the night meant regular trips to the bodega around the corner. You walked back to your apartment complex slowly, stepping one foot pointedly in front of the other as you sipped your energy drink.

You heard Jason's voice in your head as you walked, slipping into an alley that provided a handy shortcut. 'Avoid the back alleys,' he'd said. 'I want you to be safe.'

And then you died, you thought bitterly. And now you're here but you won't actually be here for me and I had to learn to keep myself safe. And, my god, I'm tired of being safe.

Maybe it was stupid, the way you slouched against the brick wall and took a swig of your drink as the man stood in front of you, knife blade gleaming in the darkness and voice spitting threats and not-so requests for your money.

You didn't even have a chance to respond, though, before Redhood himself dropped down behind him and put him down.

Jason. Jason. Jason.

But it wasn't Jason who walked towards you, you thought wearily. It was Redhood. And he was angry.

"You didn't even wait for the fun part," you drawled and his fists clenched.

"I'm walking you home," he said gruffly before turning and stomping down the alley, leaving you to follow him.

The two of you stopped by the entrance of your apartment building and you looked up at him, waiting for him to either talk or flee.

"You know you shouldn't be out this late. You're being reckless," he says stiffly.

"I want to talk to you," you respond. "Properly… preferably when I can see your face."

"I'm… working right now."

"Well yes," you sigh, "but presumably you stop at some point. Come by after. Please. I'll only ask you for this one thing." He straightens at that, a surprised sort of gesture, before reaching his hand towards you as if to cup your cheek the way he so often used to. He seemed to think better of it halfway through, though, as he let his hand drop back to his side.

"You can always ask me for what you need. I'm here. I'll… I'll be here."

"So be here. Whenever you're done, come by. I'll be awake." You don't let him respond to that, slipping through the door of your building and pointedly not looking back.

Just as you'd promised, by the time Redhood is standing on your balcony tapping gently on the glass, you're still awake. You look up from your laptop and gesture for him to come in, and he does, pulling his helmet off and sliding the glass door closed behind him before pointedly locking it.

"You shouldn't leave that unlocked. Anyone could get in here," he scolds as he comes to stand in front of you, eyeing the way you sit straight-backed on your couch.

You shrug. "It doesn't bother me." Jason opens his mouth to respond as his fists clench, and your eyes flicker to the duffle bag he has slung across his shoulder.

"You can shower first if you want," you say, nodding your head towards your hall. "I'm in no rush." Jason doesn't move, though. He stands, his eyes tracing over you silently in a way that makes you lean back from his gaze.

"You haven't slept yet?" he asks.

"Neither have you," you shoot back. He huffs and tightens his grip on the helmet in his hand.

"I'll be quick," is all he offers before stomping down your hallway towards your bathroom.

Sure enough, it's not long before he's padding back into your living room, t-shirt and sweats replacing his Redhood gear and hair damp and curling. You close your laptop and set it on the coffee table when he comes in, sitting across from you on the couch.

"Should I start?" you say quietly. "Or do you want to?"

"I'm sorry," he offers gently, and you feel the air leave your lungs a bit. "I'm sorry I didn't come for you when I got back. I'm sorry you had to be the one to call Bruce and find out what happened from him. I just…"

"It's ok, Jay." Your smile is small and sad and makes Jason's fingers twitch in an effort not to reach for you. "I left. I never expected you to chase me. And I didn't… I took my time coming back, you know. It's ok."

"Are you… back?" Jason asks tentatively, shifting where he sits. "Are you staying?"

You shrug. "I bought an apartment, didn't I?"

"That's not an answer."

"Well, I didn't call you here to talk about my life plans."

"What do you want to talk about, then?"

"I just… want to know what you want from me?"

"What?" Jason asks, bewilderment clear in his voice. "What do you mean?"

"Come on, Jay," you sigh. "I know you're around, watching me, looking out for me. But… I've been back in Gotham for a month and that's all you've done. I just want to know what you want."

Jason sights, a little oh escaping his lips as he slumps down into the couch cushions.

"Nothing changed for me," he explains quietly, keeping his eyes trained on the empty space between the two of you. "There was you, always, and then I died. I came back… and it was still you. It wasn't… it hadn't been three years for me. Not really."

"I understand," you soothe gently.

"But - for you it was. For you, three years had passed and your boyfriend was dead and you moved away and I - I had to assume that was so you could build a new life for yourself and… I was there. I heard you on the phone that night with Bruce, saying you missed Gotham with or without me." You inhale sharply at Jason's words and he looks at you with big eyes.

"Hey, no -" he says quickly. "I'm not mad, baby. Never. I'm never mad at you. I just… I thought maybe you'd moved on. It would make sense for you to move on. But then you came back and I saw you and…" Jason trails off, looking you up and down again and you can't help but shrink back ever so slightly, aware of the ways in which you'd deteriorated since he'd been gone.

"I was just so worried about you," he continued. "I wanted to look out for you, that's all. I understand if you've moved on and don't love me anymore - really, I do. But I… I still love you. And I just - I want you to be safe. That's all."

You stare at him after that, letting him shift around in apprehension while your eyes get wide and your bottom lip trembles.

"Oh, Jason," you whisper before reaching out to him. He makes a small, alarmed sound at the tears that have begun dripping down your cheeks and pulls himself towards you instead of letting you reach out into empty space. His heart thumps painfully in his chest as he considers just how many times over the past three years you reached out into nothing, wishing he was there for you to hold on to.

"Hey…" he says gently as you pull him closer, hands fisting his t-shirt and face buried in his neck. He smoothes a hand over your hair and wraps the other around your waist, anchoring you to him as he feels hot tears on his skin where your face is pressed against him.

"You're an idiot," you mumble against him and he huffs out a quiet laugh. You pull away from him and he reluctantly lets you, holding your hips tightly as you stare at him, cupping his face firmly in your hands to make sure he looks at you.

"There was never an after you, Jay," you say, voice warbling slightly with more unshed tears. "It was always, always you. Forever. I'm… I'm sorry I ran away."

"Well," Jason drawls, but you don't miss the thickness in his own voice and the way his eyes blink back tears. "In your defence, people usually stay dead longer than I did." You huff at that, a smile twitching against the corners of your mouth as you lean back into him. You bury your face back into his neck and hum appreciatively as his arms wrap back around you, holding you tightly to him.

"I'm sorry for acting like that in the alley," you murmur against his skin and he drops a kiss on the top of your head.

"Don't apologize for that, baby. You always have been tough on the outside."

"Yea but you did all that work to get through it when we first got together," you whined. "Now it's gone."

"No way," Jason responds lightly. "This, right here," he continues as he tightens his arms around you, "this is it, sweetheart. And besides… nothing would make me happier than getting to know you again."

"Yea?" your voice is cautious in a way that makes Jason tenderly pull your head away from his neck so he can press kisses across your face.

"Yea," he says sweetly. "Neither of us are the people we used to be, and we both know that. It'll take some time for us to relearn each other."

"Yea," you sigh. "I guess it will."

"Aw, cheer up baby," he says gently. "This is the good part. How lucky is it that we get to do it all over again, huh?"

"Yea," you say, the faintest hint of a laugh leaving your lip and making Jason's heart swell in his chest. "It's nice to have this back."

"Yea it is baby," Jason agrees as he cups your cheek in one of his hands, guiding your lips to his. "It's nice to have this back."

#smsn.writes #jason todd #jason todd x reader #jason todd x you #jason todd imagine #jason todd fic #jason todd fluff #jason todd fanfiction #jason todd x y/n #red hood #red hood x reader #red hood x you #red hood fluff #red hood fic #red hood imagine #red hood fanfiction

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brighttears · 11 months

Note

I have a request!!

I cannot stop thinking about Joel noticing that the reader leans into his touch but is scared to initiate anything herself. So when he finds out that her ex made her feel insecure for being clingy, he immediately talks with her and tries to tell her how she deserves all the touches she needs ❤️❤️

It's just so sweet!

Joel Miller x f!reader

No physical description, no use of y/n

Word count: 1.5k

Warnings: pet names (darling, sweetheart, good girl, baby), a little hot and heavy but no smut, mentions of previous mental/emotionally abusive relationship and reader is not fully recovered, reader’s former relationship is with a man

A/n: Sorry this took so long hope it doesn’t disappoint eeee ! also referring to Joel as ‘boyfriend’ does something to me boy oh boy

—

You try replacing touching Joel with looking at him, listening to him, just trying to soak up everything you can, hoping for something to be enough to relieve the yearning ache you’ve always felt for him. When you first got to the point in your relationship where you could touch freely, it was difficult to hold back—you’d wanted it so much and fantasized about it too often beforehand. When Joel does want physical affection, you give him as much as he’ll take, and you always have the solace of how he holds you every night. Still, you have to reel yourself back in constantly. You’d rather have that than a repeat of your ex, though. Joel is different from him in many ways—he is a better man, a good man, and you know he’s not him, but you can’t shake what your ex had told you, and you don’t want Joel to start hating you for being clingy like he had. So, you keep the dog that drools for him at bay; but as it turns out, the leash isn’t as tight as you thought.

You were at the Tipsy Bison that night, chatting with Tommy and Maria on your way out. Joel leaned against a post with you at his side, already standing close, but then he casually slung his arm around your waist, pulling you to him, brushing his thumb up and down your hip. You were barely able to follow the conversation after that, and when you had to ask Tommy to repeat his question, your boyfriend decided it was time to say goodnight.

He held your hand the whole walk back, and you once again had to ask him to repeat something he’d said, distracted both by the warmth of his large hand in yours and digs of anxiety about your behavior. When the touch breaks as you enter the house, so over you does a wave of anxiety and shame. You bow your head deeply, trying to hide your burning face, and go straight up to the bedroom. Sitting on the bed, you take your time untying your shoes, trying to mentally prepare yourself for the talk you’re sure Joel is about to give you. You’ve been trying so hard, but you’re still too clingy—freakishly clingy. No one likes someone like that. That last relationship was for two years, and you thought you’d loved him—that is, until Joel came into your life—and he was the one that left. Don’t mess this one up. you scold yourself.

When Joel walks in, causally unbuttoning his flannel, you keep your eyes on your laces, but as he moves, you can tell he’s looking at you. Left in his white tee, Joel folds his flannel up in his hands, then tosses it onto the bed as he sits down next to you.

“I’m sorry,” you begin for him, “it won’t happen again. I can control myself. I’ll be better about it. I promise.” your mind is fogged with anxiety, your chest knotted tight.

“What?”

You look up at him and his brow is furrowed, but a smile plays at the end of his lip like he thinks you’re joking. You blink. “I mean, like about being clingy, I know I have a problem with it, I’m sorry.” you turn your head back down, closing your eyes and shaking your head, hating yourself.

“Clingy? When did I ever say I have a problem with you bein’ clingy?”

“Well, I just,” you try to hide frustration in your voice, targeted only inwards, “I know I am, and that I’m just too much with that stuff, and I know that's just like unattractive and I didn’t mean to humiliate you in front of Tommy and Maria like that, I’m sorry I made such a fool of myself and you,”

He interrupts, “Woah, woah, where is this comin’ from, darlin’? Who put all that shit in your head? Cause I know I never said anythin’ like that.”

Afraid of a scowl, you keep your head down as you explain yourself, feeling another pang of guilt in your chest. “Well, my ex, I was really clingy, I mean, I am really clingy, but he, you know, taught me about it.”

“Taught you what?”

“Just that, you know, it’s—bad, and embarrassing when I do it in public, and annoying.”

“Your ex told you all this?” Finally, you look at him timidly. He’s leaning forward with his hands on the bed, looking at you with his brow knit with confusion and concern.

“Well, yeah,” you reply sheepishly.

“Okay, well first of all, that’s all bullshit,” he chuckles lightly, “you’re not clingy. Clingy’s different. An’ if this is about, you know, touch, I like you touchin’ me.” He nudges you with his shoulder, making you chuckle despite your mood. “An’ this ex a yours, well he’s just one man—actually, sounds more like a boy than a man, talkin’ t’you like that—but just cause he did’n like it doe’n mean no one else does, or that it’s bad. It’s not bad, sweetheart,” Joel shakes his head lightly, “nothin’s wrong with… liking to be touched.” his eyes travel up and down you and he shifts his torso towards you, supporting one hand on the bed, and with the other, he takes your chin with his thumb and index to angle your rosy face to look at him. “You deserve all the touchin’ you want, baby. If this is what you like,” he moves his hand slowly over your cheek, and you lean into it, “this is what I’ll give you.” Instantly you’re liquid in the cup of his hand, warmth making your eyelids lazy. You let out a sigh, near overwhelmed with, just, Joel. Those big beautiful brown eyes wander over your face and he gently presses his hand into the weight of your head and you automatically lean further into the pressure and warmth. He smirks, “I like you like this.” You giggle, easily with all of you feeling lighter.

Your anxiety has washed away completely. You can be an easy forgetter, but ground easily with Joel. He’s your man, he loves you, he’s always held your body like he needs it. You can’t even fit in a thought of your ex with Joel so close to you, holding the weight of your head, and god, those dreamy eyes on your lips.

You slide your hand up his forearm and wrap it around his wrist, then turn your cheek just enough to start kissing his palm, keeping his gaze.

Joels’ eyes flash and then he takes his hand away to take your waist and sits further back on the bed to pull you on to straddle his lap. You yelp and giggle but you’re barely actually thinking, just feeling him. He kisses you tenderly and you smooth your hands up his chest and to his face, lips slow, impassioned, and heavy. You’re on autopilot, letting your body move how it wants over Joel. Joel’s hands slide around to splay on your back and he pulls you into him; it pushes a breathy moan out of you, electricity humming over every inch of your front pressed against his body, warm and sound. Your head is angled over his shoulder and he trades your lips for your neck. The pressure of his hold, feeling all of him right up against you, relieves your ache for him, you feel it dissipate and it escapes out of you in a drawl of his name. At that, he clutches you tighter, and you feel a buzz as he hums into your neck. Then he takes his lips away, making you let out a deep breath, his nose and top lip still ghosting over your skin as he says in a husky purr, “Y’know, you’re not the only one who likes this.” Eyes closed, you let out a breathy chuckle, feeling it move against his body. Joel loosens his hold so you fall back just enough to be able to look at him, his head tilted up slightly to meet your eyes, “So don’t be afraid of touchin’ me, sweetheart.”

“Okay.” You respond, almost automatically—if he ever wants to convince you of something, this would be the way to do it.

“Good girl.” He kisses you once and then enfolds you again in a tight embrace, you hum a sigh, resting your chin lazily on his shoulder, arms around his broad back, and you want to stay here forever. You skim your hands up and down his back and he sighs deeply. Then, quiet and muffled against you, he says, “God, I want you all over me, baby.”

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heavypressure · 6 months

Text

Imagining (unknowingly) being a host for an alien fungus of some kind that reproduces through spores and gas and slowly changes my body to accommodate it's needs. It starts fairly innocent, I'm just pretty gassy for a few days and it will probably go away soon. But it doesn't. The bloated belly on my slim figure is getting harder to ignore with each passing day, growing more and more, spores multiplying every hour. I feel constant bubbling in my guts, and it's getting louder. It's starting very hard to control my farts and burps, sometimes a loud PPFFRRRRTT just slips out of my ass, and all that's left for me do is blush and apologize, while rubbing my stomach to try and calm it down. After several days of farting and belching at the office workplace (and getting scolded for it) , i notice that my appetite has increased ten times, and despite my stomach being constantly full with gas, i find myself always very hungry, and I feel the need to be constantly stuffed to the brim with food too. My body, especially ass, thighs and belly quickly gain a thick layer of fat, and the cheap fast food diet, of course, makes my gas situation even worse, and the alien fungus in my gut finally decides that I'm ready to spread it's spores. Almost no clothes can fit my bloated figure now, and what does fit, covers very little of it. I can't stop myself for blasting nasty gas from both ends everywhere i go, unknowingly spreading gassy spores to unsuspecting people around me who just thought I was a slobby weirdo.

My huge, stretched stomach constantly sounds like a bubbling cauldron with all of the glorps and gurgles, and i constantly feel myself ready to blow up, unless I release some pressure from my guts. I quickly grow to enjoy this feeling though, and become really proud of my gross behavior, spores probably influencing me to be a more proactive host.

After another week, almost all people in the office where I worked at, cannot stop themselves from blasting ass every minute or so too, clutching their huge bloated bellies, although none of them are even close to being as huge as I am. Absolutely no signs left that I was quite skinny and petite a month ago or so.

I absolutely love all of the attention I'm getting now from passerbys and random strangers when they see my unbelievably bloated form and hear my loud ass from miles away. Being constantly bloated, farting, belching, releasing thick clouds of gas almost every moment of my life is truly the life i've always desired... Even if these thoughts are not entirely mine. 🍄

#bloated gut #gassy belly #bloated stomach #belly gurgles #eprocto #inflated belly #fart kink #burping #spores

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fanfiction4sooya · 9 months

Text

Let me help (Tiffany x Fem!R)

Was feeling soft today so decided to go for a bit of fluff, but the end is just smut since (I'm a whore and cant contain myself) I thought it made sense for the story.

I'm ALWAYS up to writing for snsd, so send requests if you wanna talk abt them 💖💖💖

Mommy tiffany young, smut, fingering, oral, praising, +18, angst, mentions of harassment on work settings;

It was a horrible day.

It started good as usual, you were full of joy since you loved your job and your little routine. But it all went south when you stepped inside the office, coffee in hand and a big smile on your lips.

Your boss, may the devil take his soul, gave you three different contracts to redact before noon and kept rushing you all the time, passing by your desk and tapping his expensive watch in front of your face; watching you all the time, quietly cornering you when you were alone.

"Creep" You said to yourself as he went away, trying your best to ignore that gut wrenching feeling as he observed you.

He was having that type of behavior since you rejected him on the latest happy hour, telling him you already seeing someone. Of course he didn't believe you, but it was true. "Is he better than me? More good looking? Come on, he doesn't need to know" He said all that and concluded that you were lying to not engage with him. If he even knew...

Tiffany Young, your boss's boss was the person you were seeing. Of course he didn't knew that, very few people knew. You didn't want anyone to know so you wouldn't be seen as a gold digger after all.

She worked at another company and owned the one you worked at, but still. You didn't want to be anyone's target.

It was finally time to leave and your body was sore, you had a massive headache and you felt like crap. You just wanted to get home and pretend nothing happened, reluctant on telling Tiff what happened since you didn't wanted to bother her but it was almost impossible to keep anything from that woman.

When you got home she was already there still on her work attire, her hair up on a bun. God, she was gorgeous.

"Hi, baby" She went your way hugging you as you tensed a bit.

"Hi, Tiff" You sheepishly said, holding back the urge to cry.

"Did something happen?" She said, worried eyes meeting your sad ones. You pouted, really on the verge of tears, sniffling a bit. "Oh, sweetie..." She hugged you again, petting your hair as you nuzzled into her neck and started quietly sniffling.

After a while she managed to calm you down a little and prepare a hot bath for you, helping you take off your clothes and enter the bathtub as she did the same, positioning herself behind you. Her boobs pressed against your back almost made you give up on telling her anything as she washed you.

She didn't rush you, didn't say anything as she kept you company; After a while you finally mustered some courage.

"Mommy" You quietly called her. "I need to tell you something..." You looked down at the water and she positioned her chin on your shoulder.

"I'm all ears, my love" She kissed your skin and that made you relax enough to tell her everything that was happening as she attentively listened.

You felt her slightly tense behind you as you were talking. You knew it wasn't jealousy, it was pure rage, her protective side kicking in hard.

"'I'm so sorry you had to go through that, baby" She hugged you. "Don't worry anymore, I'll take care of it" She said, her tone lower and quite dangerous.

"Thank you for not scolding me" You were a little bit ashamed it took you almost a week to tell her. She gently held your chin, turning your face to look at her, kissing your lips in such a passionate way that it got you dizzy.

"Thank you for trusting me with such delicate matter, my love" That made your heart melt. "I would never judge your decisions, specially on this" She said, her nose touching yours. "You are so brave, baby"

She was so encouraging, so careful, it was turning you on. That secure side, her honey-like voice, the way you felt so protected, everything felt so attractive that you found it hard to hold yourself back.

You turned around on her embrace, straddling her naked form and pressing your hips against hers.

"I love you so much" You said, kissing her more passionately now as she hugged your waist kissing you with equal fervor.

"I love you, baby" You breathed heavily as she licked your lips, sucking your bottom one. That made your hips jolt, slowly grinding. "Are you sure?" She whispered and you nodded, moaning against her lips.

"Make me forget mommy, please" You pleaded and again you felt her tense under you. She loved when you pleaded for her.

"Anything for you, my love" She said, before kissing you.

She kissed you slowly, caressing your back and cupping your ass so you would grind a little harder. You rolled your eyes as she kissed your neck, trailing off to one of your stiff nipples; That made you whine, gripping hard at the sides of the bathtub. She alternated between long and hard sucks and some more shallow, light ones.

She stood up with you still on her lap placing you on the cold marble sink of her expensive bathroom, the sudden cold made you shiver a bit but her hot body made you entirely forget anything that wasn't her.

She touched you lightly at first, two fingers circling your clit making you moan and she smiled against your skin as she went down on her knees.

"My pretty girl" She said as she licked your inner thigh, eyeing your already reddened cunt. "Pinch your nipples for me, baby" She knew how you loved getting ordered around during sex and loved even more getting your nipples stimulated when getting head. "And keep your eyes on me, princess" She smiled, holding your legs. "I like it when you watch me eat"

She dove on your pussy, licking first at your slit to gather your wetness. You opened your mouth to moan but even that was hard, pinching hard on both of your nipples, your eyes glued to Tiffany's beautiful face, her hair completely tossed to the side as she sucked hungrier and hungrier. She hummed, tasting you in the most obscene way ever, making sure that you were seeing her enter your pussy with her tongue.

"Mommy" You cried out, bucking against her face. Trembling, shivering, cursing a lot when she switched her tongue with her fingers, massaging your spongy spot and fully making out with your swollen clit.

"You look so pretty with my fingers inside you, baby" She said, getting up and kissing you. "My pretty thing" She moaned when you clenched, taking your hand from your nipple to replace with her mouth. She fucked you hard now; your pussy wet and loud as she added a third finger, making you close your eyes and throw your head back. "Open your eyes, sweetie"

Pulling you from the sink, she made you stand on shaky legs as she quickly turned you around to face the mirror, holding your chin.

"Open it" She ordered again, slamming her fingers inside you, kissing your neck from behind. You shivered, forcing yourself to obey. "That'is it, sweetie" She smiled. "Look at your pretty face, look how hot you are when my fingers are all up your pussy, baby"

Indeed, you were hot like that. Disheveled hair, sweaty forehead, blushed cheeks; you put your tongue out, sucking on the fingers that were previously on your chin. That made her mind go fuzzy with desire, her fingers slamming against your core even harder now.

You moaned loudly, clenching, shaking so hard it was impossible to stay up if it wasn't for her body pressing your front against the sink. You felt that familiar tightening on your belly, feeling yourself spilling your juices on her hand.

"Mommy, fuck-" You managed to say even with your stuffed mouth, coming so hard you kind of blacked out for a moment.

Still holding your limp body she slowly took off her fingers from inside you, turning you around to kiss your puffy lips and press her body against yours.

She took you to bed after a while, laying you literally on top of her as she caressed your back, humming a soft lullaby.

Her warmth was something so utterly safe that it made you curl up and stay on her lap like a kitty would do to it's owner, so protective and quiet in a good way.

"How are you feeling?" She said as your head nuzzled to her neck.

"Loved" You said, not thinking twice. She softly laughed.

"No, baby" You looked up at her. "About that jackass" Her eyes lost a little of it's sparkle when she mentioned him.

"Oh" you blushed a bit. "I feel lighter now that I told you" You took a deep breath.

"You can tell me anything, sweetie" She kissed your lips and then your forehead. "And always count on me for help"

You nodded, kissing the corner of her lips, that pretty eye smile making your heart swell.

"I know, mommy" You said, feeling happy to be hers.

#snsd tiffany #tiffany smut #gxg smut #tifanny x fem! reader #female reader #snsd #girls generation #girls generation smut

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haikiria-san · 11 months

Text

If they were your best friend

AN: This headcanon wasn't a request, but one that I thought of doing myself, but you can ask for one if you want! <3

Synopsis: You, Y/n, are this character's best friend, what would that be like?

Characters: Tanjiro Kamado, Zenitsu Agatsuma, Inosuke Hashibira, Nezuko Kamado, Genya Shinazugawa, Kanao Tsuyuri and Aoi Kanzaki x Fem! Reader

Warnings: None (?), Fluffy, Not Romantic, Modern! AU

Tanjiro Kamado

— He's nice to most people, that's a fact, but he's even nicer to the people he cares about.

— Tanjiro is happy to see you playing with your younger brothers, he thinks it's the cutest thing in the world when you do Hanako and Nezuko's hair or play board games with Kanata.

— He helps you study, this boy is really smart and knows how to explain well. You are in good hands.

— He is very happy when you help him cook, and if you can't make some part of the recipe he will help you.

— He'll want you to meet his friends, and he'd be happy to see you getting along with them.

— He cares about your well being and feelings, and is always there if you need comfort, this boy is just an angel <3

Zenitsu Agatsuma

— Yes, he is scared and whiny, but he is a loyal friend and loves you <3

— He's smart, but not very good at explaining. He tries his best, but always ends up fumbling a little.

— Very, very affectionate. Zenitsu will hug you whenever he can, he will always walk close to you. You are his best friend after all.

— When he gets sad or scared, Zenitsu will come to you looking for comfort.

— He doesn't much like how Inosuke acts impolitely, and is jealous of Tanjiro and his far too kind treatment of you.

— He is capable of facing his fears for you. As his best friend, you have a special place in his heart.

Inosuke Hashibira

— He is certainly the most restless among you, regardless of whether you are a quiet person or not.

— Always gets you into trouble, which has gotten you a fair amount of scolding.

— Sometimes it ends up being a little impolite, but don't get so mad. He has some difficulty expressing how he feels.

— He'll take you to meet his friends, even if he creates some competitions to get your attention.

— It's not a good help to study, please, if you want some help ask someone else.

— Inosuke is someone fussy and quarrelsome, but a really loyal friend who will be there for you in most situations <3

Nezuko Kamado

— Usually likes your help cooking, whether it's something for an outing or just snacks for the afternoon.

— She is affectionate, she likes to hug you and comb your hair. She always asks Hanako to join in when you're at her house.

— Smart, but not very good at explaining. She can help you understand something when she tries hard.

— She is not a very agitated person, so the girl usually prefers to just talk or play with you.

— Nezuko is sleepy, especially after expending energy, so you end up being the girl's “private pillow” most of the time.

— She's calm, sleepy and all, but can be someone really excited when it comes to making you happy or just being around you <3

Genya Shinazugawa

— The entire Kimetsu Academy wonders how you can be best friends with someone as scary as Genya, but little do they know that the boy is a sweetheart <3

— Even with a frown on his face 90% of the time, Shinazugawa is a true angel to you and always shows his gentler side.

— He is not a genius in subjects that require calculations, like mathematics, but he does his best to be able to help you!

— Sanemi knows you, and even though he is the way he is, he's happy inside that his little brother has a friend.

— The kind of friend who is always there for you, ready to cheer you up in happy times or comfort you in sad ones.

— He introduced you to the Kamaboko Squad, first to Tanjiro because he knew the boy would be kind to you.

Kanao Tsuyuri

— Quiet, very quiet, but she tries to be more open with you and her sisters.

— She's good with botany, and she'll help you plant and care for the flowers if you like it too.

— Tsuyuri really prefers to stay at home, reading a book that interests both of them or watching a movie.

— She's very smart, but average when it comes to explaining, so she ends up asking a few questions.

— She's already introduced you to her friends, although she still feels much more at home when she's with you.

— Kanao is not the best person when it comes to comforting with words or communicating in general, but for you she tries <3

Aoi Kanzaki

— She is certainly the most responsible among you, acting almost like a big sister.

— Intelligent but without much patience to explain, although it is a help.

— The kind of friend who is concerned about your well-being, always ready to give you a hug or a scolding.

— She introduced you to her friends, and she is happy inside to see you talking and having fun with them.

— Not fond of affection, but she makes an exception for you when you're alone.

— A very kind friend in her own way, taking care of you like a sister, showing her more loving side to you always <3

AN: I hope you enjoyed this post, until next time! <3

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little-miss-dilf-lover · 1 year

Note

Hiii! its me once again. First off, hope you're doing well and I want to thank you so much for the last 2 request I had. Outstanding work! So here goes my next request: public sex with Matt, so the reader and matt are at a fancy party with Foggy and Marci, so in this special occasions the reader decides to dress really fancy and Matt goes feral with her scent. After a while at the party he just haves to fuck her. So they run to the bathroom and fuck but then they are kicked out.

Thank you sweetie!

hii lovely! im doing good thank you, hope you are too! thank you so much, it means the world. you always give such great ideas, so I hope you like it. I loved writing it, maybe a bit too much lmao💌

inspired by this gif (bc it suits perfectly)

behave (matt x f reader)

wc || 1.6k

warnings || public/ toilet sex, p in v, mentions of alcohol. think that’s it’s, just a fun and naughty one

masterlist + rules

taglist

Foggy’s here.” Matt calls out to you, pacing patiently around by the front door.

“One sec.” You shout out in reply, spritzing a couple pumps of perfume before adding your essentials to your little clutch.

Pacing towards Matt, snickering at the way he was purposely knocking his stick into things, clearly bored of waiting. “Well don’t you look handsome.” You beamed, straightening his tie.

His hands rest on your waist as he feels the fabric. “What’s this? This feels different.” He smiles at the new feeling.

“Well, that part is sheer but underneath is satin, and underneath that… is just naked skin.” You sweetly flirt, brushing over his stubble before lingering with a half kiss. “Chop chop, Foggy’s here.” You tease, holding his hand as he groans, walking you both out of the apartment.

“What colour is it?” He smirks while locking the front door.

“The satin is the same colour as your glasses, and the sheer part is the same as the suit you’re wearing- yellow.” Hiding a playful smirk.

“Yellow?!” His eyes bug out.

Snickering to yourself, “no I’m just messing, it’s black… or is it?” You tease, walking arm and arm down the stairs. Walking out to the limo, Matt holds it open, letting you in first.

Greeting Foggy and Marci warmly, “hey guys.”

“What colour is my suit?” Matt blurts out immediately, wasting no time.

“…black…” Foggy says slowly. “Did she tell you it wasn’t?” Looking at you.

“Yeah.” He pretends to look upset, causing you to laugh hard.

“You can’t do that- he hates that.” Foggy tries to scold you, but just ends up laughing himself.

“I couldn’t help myself, I’m sorry honey.” You teasingly coo, rubbing over his back.

“You guys better behave yourselves tonight, it’s kind of a big deal.” Foggy says seriously, looking

between the two of you. His hand lacing into Marci’s, “keep it in your pants.”

Rising your hands as if to show innocence, “we’d never do such thing.” Looking over at Matt to see the beginning of a smirk appear.

“Matt!” Foggy scolds, “I’m talking to you, you- you, man-whore.”

“Oh, he’s such a whore.” You tease, playfully slapping his thigh.

For the rest of the car journey, you all exchanged jokes, hoping to get it out of your systems before you got to the event.

The limo slowed down and pulled up. Foggy and Marci got out first, which left you and Matt in there for a few seconds. Turning to him, “you better keep it in your pants, Mr Murdock, you heard your friend.” Lingering yet another kiss on his lips, before you stepped out.

Adjusting your shawl, linking your arms in Matt’s as you walked into the building. “So many snooty people in here.” You quietly say.

“It’s a law event for lawyers… does that make me snooty too?” He asks, leaning down to talk into your ear as the space was too noisy.

“No. You’re slutty. Come on I need a drink.” Holding his hand, pulling him through the crowd. Asking the bartender for your drinks, paying before you both stepped aside.

“I kind of should mingle.” Matt says with a joking scowl.

“‘Mingle’ who are you?” You tease, taking a slip from your straw. “I’m just kidding, tell me who you need to see, so I can take us there- gotta make this blind guy act look believable.” Jokingly tapping his chest.

“Alright, I do actually need to speak to Hogarth.” Matt says into your ear, kissing the soft skin underneath. “You smell great, by the way. It’s my favourite perfume of yours.” He places your arm through the gap in his so that they’re linked once again. “Now please lead the way.” He chuckles as you walked towards Jeri in the corner talking to some women.

“She seems kinda occupied right now.” You wryly laugh. “Oh! Oh. That guy you met with last week is over there, want to speak to him?”

“No.” He groans.

“Why?” Groaning back, copying his tone.

Bending down to talk into your ear, “I’d rather be with you.” Pulling away with a devious smirk.

“You are naughty. No, come on, you might get some information about that case.” You say trying to perk him up.

“Hello sir, I met with you the other week, this is my girlfriend.” Pointing his thumb at you standing next to him. “I was hoping you had a few spare moments to talk about the case again.”

You were very professional when you needed to be, you could turn your playful nature off instantly. Which was actually a great thing, as it meant you were able to adapt and be charming whenever necessary. Matt’s head would tilt to the side grinning as you wooed the man, listening to the way you’d become so passionate when you spoke of Matt’s work ethic.

Saying your farewells to the man, both of your professional exteriors immediately vanish. Matt’s head hangs low, mouth mere centimetres away from your ears, “I need you, right now.”

Giggling as you looked around for Foggy, hoping not to find him. “I’ll meet you in the toilet’s upstairs. Far corner, right at the back. Two minutes.”

He brushes a featherlight kiss to your lips as you walked away from each other separating, both thinking that this way will be less obvious.

Matt is already there waiting, noticing his frustrated breathing, quickly walking over to him. “Are they all empty?” You subtly ask.

“Yeah.” He replies instantly.

“Are you just saying that?”

“Yeah.” Pulling you into the individual toilet room, slamming and locking the door shut behind you.

His hands eagerly hold your face as he brings it towards him, planting desperate kisses all over your lips. Shrugging off his suit as he panted exasperatedly into the skin under your jaw.

Gripping onto your hips as he pushed you up against the door, making out urgently. Hands roaming to the back of your neck, holding it to control your movements.

Hiking your dress and pulling it up to rest above your thighs as you begin to wind your hips forward, purposely rubbing yourself against his bulging crotch. The desperation leaves both of your lips in a whine.

He undoes his trousers, allowing them to pool around his ankles. Lifting you up from under your ass with great ease as you wrapped your legs around his lower hips. His chest is flush with yours, holding you up while he pumps his cock a couple times. Rubbing himself through your slick folds, using your wetness as lube. Lining his tip up with your entrance and keeping it there while his hands wrapped back around you.

Lowering you slightly, allowing you to sink down, moulding around him as you adjust. His grip on your waist pulls you off his cock, before he slams you back down onto him.

Your arms wrap around his shoulders, draping over his head as he starts rutting up into you. Grunting desperately into the crook of your neck as your body jerked up and down. The back of your head pressed up against the door as you whimpered at the engulfing feeling.

All of the teasing you did throughout the night felt like edging and it felt so incredibly intense to finally be here. Eyes screwing shut as the front of his cock repeatedly hit the spot you both loved.

His teeth graze along your neck as he whines into it. A slurry mix of words leaves his parted lips. “You feel so good, so so good.” Kissing under your chin. “Sound so unbelievably pretty.” Those words alone made you want to explode on site. “As much as I love those beautiful noises, you gotta be quiet, people are outside.” He pants into your ear. He hushes you, while picking up the pace.

His spare hand clasps over your mouth to block your increasingly louder whimpers. Whispering into your ear, “someone’s coming, you gonna come too, hm? You got to keep quiet though, Angel. Shush.” His thrusts becoming more precise and desperate.

The main toilet door opens, eyes screwing shut trying to be quiet while Matt incessantly rutted up into you.

His hand gripped tighter over your mouth as he could tell you were getting close. You accidentally clamp around him causing Matt to gently groan at the sensation, your hand immediately slapping over his mouth to quiet him.

Unable to hold it any longer, you let go- spasming and convulsing around his cock, causing his own warm release to spill into you.

A combination of cum ran out of you, pooling on the floor as he slowed down.

Hazily kissing over your face in a post-sex glaze-over. “You did so good.” He praises, tucking rouge strands of hair behind your ears. Kissing your nose, “so good.”

“Hello?” A random voice says.

Both of your eyes bug out, clearly not hearing a stranger enter.

“Security. I’m going to have you ask you guys to leave.” The male voice says sternly.

You both decide not to engage, hopefully, the man will just walk away. But no, you were wrong. The man knocks on the door behind your back. “Hello.” His tone sharpened.

“I’m just changing my tampon, do you mind?” You lie.

“Someone told me what was going on in here, you gotta go.”

“It’s just a tampon dude. Nothing going on.”

“Why are there two people in there?” Growing frustrated.

“I uh- needed help…?” You slowly say, trying to stop yourself from laughing when you saw Matt’s confused expression.

“I don’t get paid enough for this, you two- OUT.”

“Okay alright, one minute.”

Leaning into Matt’s ear whispering, “we both run out, you go left I go right. Go far so he can’t catch us.”

Even though Matt is technically a man of the law, he loved these fun and spontaneous moments with you.

Both adjusting your clothes and getting ready to run. He pulls you in for a tender kiss, before unlocking the door. Both immediately bolting out the door, running out of the toilets and down the hallway in a zigzag motion, loudly giggling to yourselves.

#matt murdock #matt murdock x you #matt murdock x reader #matthew murdock #matthew murdock x you #matthew murdock x reader #matt murdock smut #i need him

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nogenderbee · 4 months

Note

Hi! Saw ur requests are open! :] So, can I request Akito, Toya, and Ena with a younger sibling that's around preschool age or something? I think the dynamic would be adorable in here! How would they treat or act around this ball of energy and imagination?? I also saw how long ur list of requests are, so I'm sorry if this puts more pressure on to u!! Please take care and I love❤️ ur writing so much

Don't worry! I made sure not to overwork myself in the end so that's good~ And yes! This is such a cute idea!! And I literally enjoyed writing this so much so I hope you'll like this too!

♡˗ˏ✎*ೃ˚ 𝕃𝕚𝕥𝕥𝕝𝕖 𝕤𝕦𝕟𝕤𝕙𝕚𝕟𝕖 ₊˚ˑ༄

*ੈ✩‧₊˚ Akito, Toya, Ena with a younger sibling!reader

*ੈ✩‧₊˚ platonic

*ੈ✩‧₊˚ @bleachtheidiot @prsk-krow @yulikesminori @qxmmi @toyaswif3y @miya-akane @toyaslove @bl4cktourmaline @modyuki

✧ now Akito is the one who'll teach you how to protect yourself, if you're at late kindergarten age, trust me

✧ he may come off as irresponsible for teaching a child some verbal and physical self defence at such a young age but in reality, he just wants to make sure you won't ever get hurt

"Alright, but remember... we don't start fights. But if someone starts it, feel free to hit them back."

✧ moving onwards, he's much nicer to you but still stays with his tsundere mask

✧ when it comes to your creativity, he doesn't have a heart to tell you something is impossible or doesn't exist so he just plays along

✧ if you ask him to play pretend in private, he'll go along. But if you're asking of him to do so in public, he might come as a bit salty... he makes it up to you by treating you to pancakes later!

✧ now your energy... that's surprisingly something he likes!

✧ he'll do any sport or play any game with you, all you need to do is suggest something or tell him you're bored and he'll give you suggestions

✧ and let me tell you, if he hears someone talking badly about you, he will beat them up so... you may want to close your eyes or listen to Toya when he suddenly wants to treat nyou to some ice cream-

﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌

✧ Toya will do his best to take proper care of you and not let your father break your innocence and dreams in any way

✧ he'll also be the one picking you up from kindergarten and the one who'll always agree to play whatever game you find. he also agrees to give you piggyback rides on your way back

✧ you probably spend most of your time hanging around with his group since he'd just feel bad if he was to leave you alone in the house... but if that's what you want, he'll let you do so!

"Yes, An does have starts in her hair. No, don't pull on it, it's not nice. An you don't have to agree-"

✧ he'll agree on any idea of yours that isn't dangerous. You want to play hide and seek? He's ready to leave the house at 6am. You want to do his make up and tie his hair in ponytails? He'll sit still.

✧ he also has the patience, you can make his life harder, babble or just be extremely energetic all the time and he'll still sit there with a smile, eventually scolding you if you lead to dangerous situation

✧ and finally, he'll ready you a story before bed, scare the bed monsters away and so on!

✧ he'll never say no to your imagination and if he'll have to, he'll fight imaginary dragon in the middle of a street

﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌

✧ Ena was absolutely CHARMED by you, she loves almost every single thing about you

✧ she actually felt the need to protect you and surprisingly wasn't hiding it, untill people around her started teasing her... she just slowed down for some time but don't worry! Because soon she was back at her normal self again

✧ she loves how creative you are and will never bring you down! She even borrows you some of her art supplies!

✧ but if art isn't your fortee? Don't worry! She'll be the one who'll introduce you to make-up and music!

"Would you look at that! It seems that the idea you gave me for my art turned out fantastically!"

✧ somehow it's just hard for her to get mad at you when you're just so pure

✧ now remember how I said she loves ALMOST every single thing about you? The exception would be your energy...

✧ now don't get her wrong, she's happy your excited about life and all but not when you're too excited...

✧ she's just trying to get some rest during day and not deal with you running around house or babbling her ear of...

﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌

Affiliation with @virtualbookstore

#virtualnetwork #project sekai x reader #colorful stage x reader #project sekai colorful stage x reader #x reader #project sekai #colorful stage #project sekai colorful stage #akito shinonome #toya aoyagi #ena shinonome #project sekai akito shinonome #project sekai toya aoyagi #project sekai ena shinonome #platonic #project sekai platonic #headcanons #project sekai headcanons

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thesecondplacename · 5 months

Text

The Boy with the Bread

part 8

summary:

-------------------------------------

I was left standing. He was always going to pick her, and I was the fool who kept hoping that he would someday pick me.

I left his home, carefully walking outside, I glanced around and my eyes found Prim. She was putting the fallen snow into a bucket rather quickly.

Walking over to her, “What are you doing?” I county help but be curious over what was happening.

“Gale, “ she seemed to think of something before continuing. “The Peacegards whipped him, he’s in bad shape. The snow, I have to bring it to him.” Gale? He was injured?

I followed Prim into her home, and everything felt like chaos. Katniss was a mess, crying and screaming. Peeta was holding her back, Ms.Everdeen, was working on Gale, who seemed to be dead. Blood was everywhere.

I couldn't breathe. I made eye contact with Peeta who only casted me a glance before turning his attention back to Katniss, she was bleeding. I shouldn't be here, I ran out the door trying to breath the smell of blood filled my whole being, Gale’s lifeless body was playing like a loop thru my mind.

I don't know how I made it home, but I did and quickly made it into my room.

It was too much, again I had gotten my hopes up, and again I was hurt, it was a never ending cycle of pain. And now Gale is bleeding out in Katniss' home, everything was too much.

I lost it. I threw my dresser onto the floor, ripped my mirror off the wall and smashed it onto the floor. Someone was screaming and destroying my room. It was me. I had completely lost it, everything had become too much for me to handle.

I don't know how long I was there for but I do know that once I regained consciousness, my entire room was gone, everybit of furniture had been completely destroyed. And I laid at the center of it all. I was sobbing, so hard that I didn't even notice that my room door opened. My mom had returned to see the destruction I made. She didn't yell or try to scold me for the mess, instead she joined me on the floor and wrapped her arms around me.

“Shh, baby it's ok, I'm here.” she spoke so softly as she held on to me so tight. “Let it out baby, it's ok, I can take it.” And she did as I sobbed into her arms. She didn't once loosen her grip. She didn't once let go.

“Why am I so hard to love, why is loving me so hard?” Why am I so unwanted? Why do people struggle so hard to want me?

“I love you, I love you so much (Y/n).”My mom spoke as her grip around me tightened. “Let my love for you be enough (Y/n).” I wish it could be. But it wasn't, and I think that she knew that.

“I’m sorry.” It was all I could say.

“It’s ok, as long as I’m here you don't have to shoulder this pain. As long as I’m here you will always have someone who loves you more than life itself.” I let myself break down in her arms, knowing that she wouldn’t leave or let go.

I don't know how long we were there together, but the sun was already setting by the time I had managed to pull myself together.

“You ok?” I looked into her eyes and she looked so tired, she must have just come home from working and saw the mess I was in. I felt so guilty she deserved her rest, but here she was taking care of me instead.

“Yeah, thank you mom,” there was something I needed to do. “I need to see Gale. the Peaceguard.” She seemed to understand, as she let me go, and pulled me up to stand with her.

“Go.” She spoke with a tired smile.

--------------------------------------------------

Working on part 9 as I upload this!!

#male reader #x male reader #katniss everdeen #the hunger games peeta #peeta mellark #katniss and peeta #peeta mallark x male reader #peeta x male reader #the hunger games x male reader #thg gale #gale hawthorne #primrose #ms.Everdee #part 8

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purple-plum-petals · 2 years

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—⊱ Cuddles for a Rough Day ⊰ || Floyd Leech x Reader

╭─━━━━━━━━━━━━─╮ Character(s): Floyd Leech (Twisted Wonderland), Jade Leech (Twisted Wonderland, mentioned), Azul Ashengrotto (Twisted Wonderland, mentioned), Grim (Twisted Wonderland, mentioned) Reader Type: Human, Ramshackle Prefect (Gender-Neutral Pronouns) Warning(s): Alludes to Mental Illness (Symptoms of Depression Noticeable in Floyd’s Behavior, but Nothing is Stated Outright), Use of Japanese TWST Terms (Madols instead of Thaumarks, etc.) Genre: Drabble, Slight Angst, Fluff (Can be Read as Romantic and/or Platonic) Word Count: ~1,200 words Prompt: “…and you're absolutely sure this is what you need?” [Prompt List] Author’s Note: First time writing for Twisted Wonderland, whoo! Apologies if anything seems OOC, I tried my best to keep Floyd in character but he’s just a difficult character to write for in my opinion (tbh, I feel like all of them are kind of hard to write for in their own ways haha). I knew I wanted Floyd to be the first character I wrote anything for since he was the first character I fell in love with; I’m probably one of the biggest Octavinelle simps out there, but Floyd will always hold a special place in my heart. I tried to stay away from the “Reader can immediately improve Floyd’s mood if they’re around even though his literal brother and childhood friend can’t” trope and tried to go for more of a “Reader is an emotionally mature and caring individual who helps Floyd by just being there for him” route. Helpful and constructive criticism would be much appreciated, but nothing too harsh please!

→ If you enjoyed my work, please reblog it if you can! Exposure on Tumblr is based on reblogging content rather than liking it, so your support would be much appreciated! ♡ ╰─━━━━━━━━━━━━─╯

⋆﹥━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━﹤⋆

When you had gotten a sudden text from both Jade and Azul about Floyd’s current dismal mood, you weren’t exactly surprised; the eel was well-known for his sudden and rapid mood swings, after all. Though, you had no idea what exactly they expected you of all people to do. If even they of all people had trouble trying to lift Floyd’s mood as his childhood friend and brother respectively, what exactly were you, a magicless human from another world, supposed to do? Still, their texts seemed a bit urgent, and you did consider Floyd to be a good friend of yours… so you made your way over to their dorm now that (thankfully) classes were done for the day. That was how you ended up where you were, awkwardly standing outside the door of Floyd and Jade’s shared room in Octavinelle with a tray of takoyaki in your hands (gifted to you and cooked by Jade himself for you to bring to his brother).

Floyd had skipped class throughout the entire day and, apparently, hadn’t even gotten out of bed yet – not even to get something to eat. With a tentative hand, you raised it and lightly tapped your knuckles against the door, waiting for a response. You tried again and, with your second attempt, you heard shuffling from inside the room but nothing besides what sounded like him just shifting around in bed. You took a deep breath and finally asked, “Floyd? Are you alright? Jade and Azul said you seemed… a bit out of it today and asked me to come to check up on you myself.” Still nothing, so you continued talking, “I brought some takoyaki – Jade made it since it’s your favorite and you haven’t eaten today; it smells pretty good, I think. Hehe, Azul wasn’t very happy about it, though.”

Another minute or two passed by silently before, all too suddenly, the door flew open and two arms wrapped themselves around your waist, pulling you into the dark room as the tray of food fell to the ground with a loud ‘clang’ that resonated throughout the halls of the eerily quiet dorm. You couldn’t see anything, but you could feel Floyd holding onto you like a lifeline, his head pressed against your neck as he kept squeezing your body closer to his. You didn’t have time to scold him for wasting the food before his mood began affecting you, too – usually, whenever he was like this, it never lasted longer than a few hours but, for some reason, it has lasted all day.

“Do… do you want to talk about it?” Floyd didn’t say anything, but you felt him shake his head ‘no’ before picking you up like you weighed nothing and walking back to his bed, flopping down on his side with you still held tightly in his arms. You didn’t say anything more, shifting slightly to get a bit more comfortable as your stroked his hair lightly, staring aimlessly into the dark room.

As your eyes started adjusting, you turned your head slightly to look at the wall that was to your back, noticing the multiple open containers of cookies and bags of sweets on the shelf – at least you knew Floyd hadn’t been starving all day, but he needed some food with more sustenance like the takoyaki… that was probably still lying in the hallway outside of his room. Hopefully, Jade and Azul wouldn’t put the wasted food on a tab for you to pay off later or something – you didn’t have the madol for that given how much Grim ate you out of house and home.

You turned back to where Floyd was still buried in your chest, sighing as you continued to pet his head and telling him in a soft voice, “Floyd, you need something real to eat – I’m sure these snacks aren’t very filling… or healthy for that matter.”

He didn’t say anything for a moment before muttering out, his voice slightly obscured due to where his face was currently, “… ‘M not hungry. Just need my Shrimpy to stay here and cuddle with me.” Floyd punctuated his sentence by squeezing your body closer to his ever so slightly, not as tightly as his usual hugs were, though this was something you weren’t going to complain about. It’s nice when his embraces don’t make you feel as though he’s going to squeeze the living daylights out of you, but you did miss the usual vigor they had.

You sighed quietly and pushed him away from your chest gently in order to make eye contact with him, telling him, “Okay but, once you’re feeling up to it, I’ll go make you something to eat, okay? Eating that much sugar isn’t good for you, you know?”

You could see his cheeks puff out slightly in a pout before he rolled his eyes, the golden one seeming to glow in the darkness as he muttered out a “…fiiiiine” before returning to his previous position nuzzled against your chest.

“Thank you, Floyd.” You said, your voice a whisper and a soft smile gracing your features as you returned your attention to his hair. You ran your fingers through his teal locks, working out any knot with a careful hand in order to try and not cause him any pain in the process – there was nothing worse than a tangled mass of hair being ripped out of your head when you’re just trying to relax. Floyd’s hair was surprisingly soft, but you could tell from the slight grease that coated the strands that he hadn’t washed it for at least a day or two.

Time passed by and, after what seemed like hours with him just holding you close and you absentmindedly messing around with his hair, you asked him tentatively, not expecting an answer since you were 99% sure he had clonked out at some point, “Is… is there anything else I can do for you?”

Floyd’s response was immediate which surprised you greatly since you were almost positive he had been asleep, “Nah – just keep playin’ with my hair.” He pulled away from you for a moment and grabbed your hand in his, placing it against his head with a content smile on his face, his sharpened teeth not as intimidating as they were to you in the past and his eyes shining teasingly.

You rolled your eyes like he had done before, smiling as you continued your ministrations as you asked in an attempt to make sure you were giving him what he required, “…and you're absolutely sure this is what you need?”

“Yep~… Now be quiet and just let me squeeze you, Shrimpy.” Floyd sang out, pulling you into his chest as he nuzzled his chin into your hair. Well, you weren’t expecting this, but it was pretty nice. Your neck had started hurting after so long in the same position, and now you were able to use the Floyd Leech as a pillow – not many people could say that in their lifetime.

Smiling you told him, “Okay, okay – my lips are now sealed,” before closing your eyes and falling into a deep sleep wrapped up in his arms; hopefully Grim wouldn’t wonder where you disappeared off to.

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thetriplets3 · 1 year

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❊ never alone ❊

TW: mentions and alludes to mild to severe depression, descriptions of physical signs of an eating disorder, allusions of an eating disorder, talks about nightmares, and panic attacks are mentioned

You have the sweetest soul there is. You are so mindful of how I’m feeling and always asking if there’s anything you can do for me or if I’m okay. Usually I find this annoying because the answer almost every time is no, every day is a struggle for me, every day is the same. But I’ll never get annoyed hearing you ask because you care so much and would take my problems in a heartbeat if you could. You’re my medicine. You radiate this comforting and healing energy that is slowly healing all my wounds.

The wounds you have started healing in me are beginning to open back up. I’ve moved 2 hours away for school, 2 hours away from you and anyone I know. I’ve gotten to the worst place I’ve ever been mentally, and it’s noticeable physically. Whether you say it or not during our facetime calls, you noticed everything. You noticed how much weight I had lost, that I was merely just a skeleton. You checked in on me occasionally but never brought up the change in my appearance, not entirely sure how to approach that. I don’t think I realized just how bad it had gotten. When you deal with something every day for so long, it becomes a new normal for you. It makes you blind to the things around you.

I had tremors 24/7, graphic vivid nightmares that I can still see when I close my eyes, permanently scarred in my mind. I could barely sleep because I was so afraid of the nightmares. I’d start my days with a shower hoping it would add a little pep in my step but that was always unsuccessful. Putting my music on, I’d turn the water to scolding hot and just think about how I couldn’t stand every day being the same, it was a never ending nightmare. From the moment I woke up to the moment I fell asleep I would cry and cry until I cried myself into a panic attack to the point of not being able to breathe. I didn’t recognize the face staring back at me in the mirror, it was as if I was a ghost watching myself bleakly trying to survive. Food was impossible. Everything tastes different. Barely able to get a snack down, I was on a fine line between life and death, and no one seemed to notice. All I needed was for one person to realize I was barely able to keep my head above the water and no one did. I was desperately and silently pleading for help.

Waking up everyday and knowing exactly what will happen, as it’s been like this for weeks, knowing there’s nothing you can do to make it stop, knowing you are merely just an empty vessel of a skeleton leads me to think of only one option. To think those thoughts weighs so heavily on my mind it will forever haunt me. I’m laying in bed, crying so hard I’m on the verge of a panic attack, I hear a knock on the door. Waiting to see if my roommate will answer the door, the knocking stops, must have been for her. I’m sucked back into my thoughts and tears, clawing at my chest desperately gasping for a breath when I’m interrupted by a knock. I freeze, confused as to who would be knocking on my door. I crawl my way out of bed, bringing the blanket that’s wrapped around my shoulders with me. With a heavy sigh I opened the door not really wanting to see anyone. I was in shock, you were the last person I thought would be at my door but the one person I needed.

“You gonna say hi or just stare at me?” You ask with a smirk on your face.

I attack you in a hug, causing you to stumble backwards. My blanket covered body engulfs your torso as you wrap your arms around my shoulders and back comfortingly rubbing them. I refuse to let go because this is the one thing I’ve been needing so badly and I’m afraid if I let go it’ll all disappear. One thing I love about you is that you won’t let go of a hug until the other person does first, so we stay hugging each other in my doorway like our lives depend on it. Pressing a sweet kiss to the top of my head, you briefly pull away from the hug to wrap your arms around my torso, lifting me off the ground. I move my blanketed arms to wrap around your neck, burying my face in the crook of your shoulder and neck. I can’t help but let the tears continue to fall, wetting your neck.

“Oh sweetheart, I’m here it’s okay, let it out I’ve got you” you coo into my ear, resting your head against mine. You walk to my bed with our bodies still clinging to each other. Placing yourself under my covers with my body laying partly on yours, holding on to you for dear life. You reach up to remove the blanket that’s been hiding my body.

“You’ll be too warm honey, you gotta take the blanket off” you say.

I release my grip on the blanket letting you put it to the side, covering me with my bedding. Now that my blanket is gone my body is revealed. You can see and feel just how much I’ve been struggling. A tear slips your eye as you quickly wipe it.

“I see you sweet girl, I see that you’re not okay, I’m here to help” you whisper in the sweetest voice, rubbing my back soothingly.

That’s what I’ve been needing to hear, to know that somebody sees I’m not okay and is willing to help. Cuddling into your side, you delicately trace your fingers along my back. You can feel the tremors that have taken over my muscles. You knew I had hard days but weren't aware they got this bad. I didn’t know what was happening to me and I was scared. Seeing me in this fragile, vulnerable state breaks your heart. Your gentle tracing on my back is lulling me into a much needed nap.

“You’re not alone now sweetheart, I’m here I’ve got you. We’ll get through this together” you whisper in my ear as I drift off into sleep.

You stay awake and watch me for a while to make sure I don’t need anything. Your eyes graze my face watching as it contorts and slightly reacts to the nightmares. You tighten your hold on me, reminding me that you’re here. You eventually drift off into sleep yourself. I’m awake at 5am, unable to go back to sleep. You’re a heavy sleeper so I know reaching over you to grab my laptop to put on a show won’t disturb you, even putting my headphones in to make sure I don’t wake you. Putting on my comfort show, I try to relax. I zoned out that I didn’t see you wake up.

“Good morning sunshine, how are you feeling today?” you say with a sleepy voice that makes my heart skip a beat.

I grumble in response and shove my face into your neck. “Nightmares, only slept till 5” I mutter into your neck.

“I’m sorry honey that’s gotta be unpleasant” You say sincerely.

We stay in bed for about an hour watching tv as your hand rubs against my back, in an attempt to soothe my body. “We should get up and get ready” You tell me. This is the hardest part of the day for me. It always feels like the most difficult thing for me to do. I stay in bed while you go to the washroom to do your business and get changed. Coming back to my room you find me sleeping. Letting me sleep for a little while longer you pick out something comfy for me to change into. You even go as far as pairing items together to make outfits for me, so it takes less effort. You tidy up my room a little just by straightening and putting things where they belong. I wake up as you're doing so and sit up in bed stretching. You hand me a hoodie and sweatpants to change into, you turn around as I change.

“Shower? Skincare? What do you want to do?” You ask.

“None, too challenging” I mutter, embarrassed that I couldn't manage basic self care.

“I can do it for you, well at least the skincare. I can stay in the room while you shower if you don't wanna be alone” you suggest. I nod knowing that I should take care of myself.

I hear you enter the bathroom and you announce that you're just on the counter. It feels easier knowing that you're here encouraging me every step of the way. I take my time and wash my hair while I'm in here, not knowing when I'll be able to manage it again. I call out to you letting you know that I'm done and I see your arm stick through the curtain holding a towel that you must've thrown in the dryer to warm it up. My heart melts at the small but meaningful gesture. Drying off in the shower I reach for my robe and put it on, stepping out to see you. You pat the counter telling me to hop up so you can begin my skincare. You know my routine by now having seen me do it plenty of times. My eyes flutter shut as your fingers delicately take care of my skin. You’re always so gentle with me it makes my heart do backflips.

Everything feels easier when I have you here. I no longer feel like I’m drowning, you keep me afloat. It’s been about a year since I’ve moved back home, it’s a long healing process and you’re here to help me every step of the way. With you by my side, I’m never alone.

#matt sturniolo #matt sturniolo x reader

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acourtofinkandpapyrus · 5 months

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A Flower With Petals of Flame: Part nineteen (Eris x Reader)

Warnings: Mentions of trauma, toxic father, mentions of past attempted SA on reader. Emphases on attempted. Arguing, secrets

Part eighteen Part twenty

Tag list: @esposadomd

Call me a magician because I pulled this out of nowhere! A second post in one night! So this is mostly a fun episode where Y/n hangs out with Eris and Rhys in a cabin. That is until her father shows up...

The place we end up in is not too unlike the illyrian mountains back home, but as we step into the snowy landscape, I feel as if I’ve come back alive, not slowly losing myself as I have been for the past few months.

There’s a cabin in the distance, and I start trudging toward it.

I start to feel warm, and I realize it’s Eris’s doing, even if he’s not looking at me.

My brother seems to still be freezing his ass off though.

“So this is where Dad’s living?” Rhys asks, looking at the small cabin. I shake my head, gritting my teeth.

“No, this is where he meets up with me. He and mom live elsewhere.” I shout, trying to get him to hear me as the wind starts to pick up.

I can’t hear his reply, and don’t bother to look, focusing on their sorry asses into the cabin.

That is until I hear a crash, and I see both of them in the snow, rhys trying to get off of Eris as fast as possible.

“What is wrong with you two?!” I shout over the wind, and they both talk over each other in their attempts to respond.

“It was his fau-” “He tripped me-”

I don’t even bother to figure out who's saying what, turning around and muttering about stupid males as I throw the door open, heading straight to the fireplace.

The sounds of the males entering after me and closing the door has me jumping into speech, “You two are going to behave. However you remember my father being, he’s worse now.” I warn them, remembering the last time I went head to head with him.

“We aren’t children Y/N.” Eris bristled, and I rolled my eyes.

Rhys took a step up to him, looming over him ominously. “Maybe my sister loves you, but if I hear you speak to her in that tone again, I’m going to rip your throat out.” He growled.

I choke on nothing, dropping the log I had just picked up, almost smashing my foot. “Behave!” I scold, trying to imagine a situation where we manage to get my father to come back to Velaris without burning the whole house to the ground.

They both bristel, but they settle down a little.

Without a word, once I finish piling the logs into the fireplace, Eris lights it up without a word.

Rhysand sits down and he huffs a laugh. “Hey, his style seems to have stayed the same.”

A smile pulls at my lips. He was right, everything was stuffy and formal, extremely uncomfortable. I have memories as a child of sitting on the floor because of how stiff all of the couches were, preferring the carpet.

“If you two want anything to eat or drink, the kitchens that way.” I say, gesturing to the hall and plopping down on the couch, next to Rhys, grimacing.

Still as hard as rock.

Rhys seemed surprised, but Eris just chuckled.

I groaned as Rhys’s head whipped around to look at Eris. “Something funny?”

Eris shrugs, a smug smile on his face. “I don’t know, just the fact that you think your sister was going to play housemaid.”

I close my eyes. I needed sleep, that’s what I needed. But instead, I was getting stupid quibbling from my brother and my mate.

My mate.

I hadn’t really had time to think about it.

Somewhere deep down, I think I had always known. I had never cared for someone the way I had for him, and if he wasn’t my mate, then I didn’t want one.

Something goes flying past my head and my moment of peaceful thoughts is gone.

The dagger imbeds itself in the wall beside my head, and I look between the two, and they are both paused mid argument, staring at me.

At some point Rhysand had gotten up, and the dagger had flown in their scuffle.

I sigh, using my magic to winnow the dagger into my hand. It was one of Rhys’s.

“If you two can’t get along, I am going to throw you into the snow until I’m done, capiche?” I say, staring both of them down.

Rhys hangs his head a little bit, but Eris just looks away with a huff.

“Sit down.” I order both of them, waving the dagger around.

They did, and I just stared at both of them for a minute. “We are all going to say one thing that’s bugging us about the other two. How about I start?”

“The two people I care the most about can’t get along in the same room for five seconds.” I say, then pointing the dagger at my brother, the tip pointing downward so he knows I’m not going to stab him or anything. “Now you.”

He gives me a sort of “Why me?” look before relenting, taking a deep breath. “I don’t like how Eris seems to think all of this is a game for his enjoyment, and I don’t like that you didn’t tell me you could have lost all your memories.”

Eris snorts before adding, “She didn’t tell me either. Not only that, but apparently there’s other things that she’s just not going to tell us.”

I slowly get up as Rhysand starts to respond.

Of course. Of course they were going to bond over me not telling them things.

“She came back from the dead and just acted as if everything was normal. I mean, I would have been fine if she had just told me she wasn’t the same person that…”

I make it into the kitchen without them noticing and get myself a glass of water.

This was a horrible mistake. I should have left them at home. If Dad comes by and decides to start bringing up what happened.

I chug the water, trying to take my mind off the possibility.

“Hey, are you okay?” I turn to see Eris leaning against the door frame, still a hint of a smile on his face.

“Nope, but I thought I made that clear.” I respond, rinsing off the cup and putting it back.

He shifts, entering the room. “You know you can talk to me, right?”

I sigh. “If you’re saying this because of what I’m not telling you, it’s not like the memories thing. It’s not time sensitive and it’s really not important.”

“Then why did you not tell me you told me everything if it’s not important?” He questions as I push past him, going back into the living room.

“Because I wasn’t sure, but I am now.” I say, plopping back down on the couch.

Rhys winnows into the seat next to me. “What are you sure about?” He asks, batting his lashes at me.

I look between the two of them and groan. “I know what you two are doing.”

Rhys lays down across my lap and I roll my eyes as he says, “I have no idea what you’re talking about dear sister.”

“The two of you begging isn’t going to make me change my mind.” I say, pushing out of my lap.

He dramatically rolled off the couch and onto the floor, and Eris chuckled. “We’re just worried. Can’t you put our minds at ease?”

“I can play uno.” I say, heading over to a box on a bookshelf, pulling out a deck of cards.

Rhys looked up at me curiously from where he lounged on the floor. “What’s that?”

I grin.

I manage to keep them entertained and distracted enough not to ask me questions for a few hours, pulling out all the games we didn’t have in Prythian.

Monopoly was the worst, since Rhys wouldn’t stop using magic to put his face on the money, and Sorry the best. Mostly because they could beat each other up in the game, and I didn’t have to worry about physical violence.

I got up as I heard a knock at the door, the boys too busy bickering about the rules of the current game to notice.

I open the door a crack, and lose my smile as I see my father standing outside in a suit, not a single hair out of place.

Before he can make himself known, I quickly step outside, shutting the door behind me.

“So you’ve decided to let Rhysand in on the secret of the afterlife. And was that Beron’s son I saw?” He asks, his face splitting into a nasty grin.

We have had many arguments about bringing Rhysand into the fold, but I had always turned it down.

If there was one thing I have learned, it’s that I could not trust my father. He always had his own agenda, and if he wanted Rhys to know, it was better that he didn’t.

“That was Eris, yes. But what I’m here to talk about is Velaris. It’s in danger.” I state, getting right to the point.

“Oh? And I thought you’d finally decided to take me up on my offer.”

I stiffen.

I hadn’t seen my mother in years. I had tried to find her, but my father had taken her and hidden her away somewhere.

He told me that he'd only let me see her if I came to live with them and gave up on all this “nonsense”.

Of course he wanted a bargain. I, of course, said no.

“No. But I do need your help.” I grit out, hating the way the words taste.

He toned down his smile, knowing he had the upper hand. Bastard.

“Well, I knew this day would come.” He says with a flourish, coming over to me and placing his hands on my shoulders. “Of course I’ll come back and help run-”

“Oh fuck you.” I snarl, slamming him away and sending him tumbling, his eyes wide. “We need help because Velaris is about to be under siege, and I need help strengthening the defenses.”

I stepped up to him, even though I could not reach his height, I made up for it with my rage. “My brother could live the rest of his life happily without seeing you again, but I need your help. So whatever the hell price you demand, demand it from me.”

We stare at each other, and his eyes narrow slightly, his lips tugging upward again. “I want you to come home after all this is over.”

I take a deep breath, closing my eyes. “Okay.”

He blinks, surprised. “I don’t want you hanging out with those ruffians anymore.”

I want to scream, to tear him apart. But instead, I say softly, “Those are my friends.”

He scoffs. “Some friends they are. Well, you won’t be consorting with their type anymore.”

For Velaris.

“I-”

No.

“No.” I say, holding my shoulders higher. “I’ll go back with you, I’ll live with you and mom, but I will not let you control my life anymore.”

He stares down at me, shrugging. “I guess you’re on your own then.” He turns on his heel, walking off.

“You’re seriously just going to let Velaris get destroyed over this?” I shout, following him deeper into the snow.

He turned, snarling as he loomed over me, “No. You are going to let Velaris get destroyed because you’re petty enough to let a whole city burn because you want to spite me.”

I hadn’t realized I had curled into myself. I take a step back, feeling like the little girl he put through hell again. “It’s not like that-”

“Of course it is. It’s always been to hurt me. I arranged for you to marry an Asteri so that you could keep your family safe, and you ran away on the day after your wedding.” He sneered.

My stomach flipped. “You married me to people who had tortured me. Of course I ran away.” I say, my voice smaller and meeker than I wanted.

He took another step towards me and I barely avoid falling backwards into the snow. “You never told me about your wedding night. Maybe you just left because you didn’t like-”

“I never let him touch me.” I manage to get out, ice tears starting to form around my eyes.

“He tried, and I stabbed him. That’s how I got out. So if you think you’re going to use some sort of trauma against me, think again.”I manage to say before taking a step back.

He snorted. “You know, maybe if he had you wouldn’t be such a-”

A wave of darkness crashed into him, and I turned to see Rhysand and Eris standing side by side, glowing with rage in the snow.

I blanch as I see them there. How much had they heard?

Rhysand winnowed forward. “What the fuck did you do?” And I knew then that he heard all of it, or at least the important parts.

Eris came up next to me, looking at me questioningly.

I shake my head. “Let him handle this. He needs it.”

My father made to stand, but Rhys pinned him to the ground, using an Illyrian technique I recognised.

“I did what I had to for the family.” My father hissed, and I watched as Rhys’s fist fly through the air.

I took a step forward. Even if I hated him, even if I watched him hurt me over and over again, I didn’t want to see my father hurt.

Eris takes my arm, and we’re suddenly in the cabin.

He turns me toward him and pulls me into a tight hug. “Rhys won’t kill him, just let them work it out.” He murmurs into my hair.

“I know. I know I shouldn’t care about that asshole, but I do.” I say angrily into his chest. Wishing that my heart would stop twisting in pain.

My father never loved me. I forget that sometimes. Maybe when I was a baby, but ever since I became me, he never loved me.

“Sometimes our heart does funny things.” Eris reassures me, running a hand through my hair.

The cabin is all too quiet as he holds me, and my fathers words all too lasting.

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