#but i'll never make again because it was so convoluted and stupid | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

theerurishipper · 5 months

Note

The biggest truth that solves all plot holes in Miraculous: they’re bad writers.

No excuse of this being a kids show works because if you want to be not held accountable for holes then fine act like SpongeBob

but you can’t have everything

Yeah. I didn't give a damn about the "plot holes" in Seasons 1-2, or even Season 3 to some extent, because those were mostly monster of the week type of episodes. Sure, there were some semblances of plot and world-building, but it was still mostly episodic and the show still mostly focused on being goofy and entertaining, so I turned of my brain and enjoyed it greatly.

But then Season 4 came along and tried to change the tone of the series entirely, from being a monster of the week to having an actual plot and overarching story, and proved that the writers for the show don't really know how to do that? And then they started digging their holes deeper and deeper and made so many baffling decisions in the writing that the show just turned into a huge mess, full of unresolved plot points, underdeveloped characters, convoluted storytelling, and many unfortunate implications.

And it's like you said. If the show wants me to take it seriously, I will. I'm going to look at a show for what it is. When the show was presenting itself as a goofy episodic show to entertain kids, I judged it as such and I enjoyed it, because Miraculous is good at that. I loved Seasons 1 and 2. Season 3 less so, because it started The Plot™, and it wasn't good at that, but I still enjoyed a lot of it. But Seasons 4 and 5 came along and demanded I take them seriously, so I did. And they weren't good, because the writers aren't good at that kind of storytelling. They're good at goofy shenanigans, but not at complex plots and characters.

And "it's a kids show" is not an excuse. Kids shows can explore complex subjects and can have great plots and characters (ATLA). But it still has to be, you know, good. Kids aren't stupid. I know that kid me would have also hated the Season 5 finale, because Adrien is my favorite, and he wasn't there, and they made Marinette lose.

But at the same time, this is still a show for kids. Miraculous is a kids show, and therefore, it has the responsibility to not promote harmful messages. What would an abused child who is in a situation similar to Adrien's think when they see him call Gabriel a hero in the finale and say that he doesn't know if he'll ever be like him? Children aren't stupid and incapable of understanding anything, and they do deserve good quality of writing, but they also aren't capable of complex media analysis. And when you see people making these long-ass posts talking about how the finale is actually not what it seems like, actually, you have to consider the target audience. A kid isn't going to be picking up on the deep and nuanced hidden meanings in Gabriel final moments that prove he hasn't changed. They are going to see Gabriel hugging his wife, smiling and surrounded by pretty and warm lights while beautiful music plays. If we have to write all these long theories justifying the ending and trying to suggest that what was obviously portrayed on the screen isn't what the show is really trying to say, is a kid really going to get it?

Which is why you see so many people saying shit like "aw Gabriel was really a good man," or "he was never the villain." These people are probably like, 12–13 year olds, and they are watching a show meant for kids. And as a kid, I'm not going to like that Adrien wasn't in the finale, sure, but does that mean I'll understand that Gabriel is supposed to still be a bad guy when the show tells me to my face that he isn't?

It's not like the show can't deal with complex and nuanced characters. I myself have written many character analyses and have treated these characters as complex and nuanced, and they could have been. Again, look at ATLA. Zuko, for example, is a very complex character, but he is still brought to life in a way that allows kids to understand all the nuances and subtleties in his story clearly. There is a lot of rather complex symbolism, but the kids get the jist of it and can understand his story well, even if they don't catch all the minute details. Hell, take Azula. The show doesn't shy away from showing her doing bad things, but it also makes it blatantly obvious that you should feel sorry for her in the end, and that she's also a victim. Again, kids can understand this.

And that's where Miraculous falls flat. The writers fucked up their message. They wrote some deeply problematic stuff, where the abuser won. The bad guy won, but he was actually a good guy. So, people who act like Gabriel maybe aren't all that bad. What Gabriel did in the end was good, and we should all try to be like him. Kids aren't going to question it. In this way, "it's a kids show" goes from being an excuse to being a problem. It's what it says on the tin, and what's on the tin is not good. That's how I feel.

Thank you for your ask!

#MLB #Miraculous Ladybug #S5 Finale #Meta #My meta #ML Salt #ML Writing Salt #ML Writers Salt #Asks

67 notes · View notes

rin-enjoyer · 4 months

Text

ok finally put my hands in the air and sat down to compile the team 7 sensei rin au timeline. subject to change but like. for now here it is ^_^

-obito doesn't push kakashi out of the way of the boulder. MINDNUMBING GUILT FOR THIS CHILD!!!! rin cares about as much as she did when obito was the one to die (not at all lmao)

-important side quest! minato's favorite was kakashi and when he dies he is sad. this sadness makes him sloppy and he ends up getting captured by iwa and killed for all of the war crimes. he deserved it <3

-obito: devistated rin: eh

-with minato and kakashi gone, the team is kind of... less important... obito and rin stop going on missions outside of the village as much and without the spotlight of Politics pushing rin to become a mednin in order to copy previous succesful team setups she starts persuing other interests which.

-rin: yay now i can do what i want!!! i am free to choose any path i want!! i don't have to be a medic if i dont want to be!! i can finally follow my dreams of-

rin: *remembers that she only dislikes being a mednin because she didnt choose it. and doesnt know what she Actually wants to do*

rin: ah

-she waffles around a bit. a lot. she never actually really settles on anything, and just sort of ends up becoming a very well-rounded guy.

-anyways meanwhile in grampy madara's spoopy cave kakashi is having a Bad Time. so is madara. he got like,, the WORST guy ever to enact his plan, on account of kakashi's stupid single-minded loyalty to konoha, and he doesnt even have a sharingan

-convoluted plan to murder obito in a way that hopefully convinces kakashi to help out and gets madara an eyeball so that the plan can actually be fulfilled: activate

-obito gets the three-tails and rin hunts him down because she doesnt have anything better to do and when she finds him he's all "rin we gotta find kushina!! i can't go back to the village yet otherwise explodsions :C" and rin does some quick mental math and decides that that seal is NAUGHT getting fixed.

-rin kills obito there and then in that cave, annoying madara and the kiri ninja and obito if he was not dead. this is a Big Moment for her because she makes a Decision!! she views this as "a sliver of her true self shining through" for a while which.. is complicated but i'll get back to that.

-madara throws a rock at her. or something. and knocks her out so he can at least go scavenge the eyeballs but he only gets one before uchiha search and rescue shows up (obito was NOT disregarded by his clan disregarded uchiha do not get put on the Special Superspeed Pathway to Become Hokage team fight me)

-they see rin, unconscious, and obito, missing an eye and only recently killed, and put two and two together and get five and go "awwww D: girl almost died protecting his body from that mysterious shadow guy who just disappeared. even if she failed her effort means a lot."

-so rin, despite being kind of filler on the politics team, getts thrust into the limelight as a handy-dandy link to mend village relations with the uchiha. "girl who protected her teammate with everything she had..." ect ect. which is funny

-as a sign of good will the uchiha give her obito's remaining eye, which is a surprisingly good fit for her jack of all trades style.

-orochimaru is the last candidate for hokage so danzo n hiruzen start really scrambling to get his public reputation up. what better way to do this than to give him a child? orochimaru is studying sharingan anyways, right? he's not unhappy with it and it once again consolidates political power and anko increased his likability by that much, so like? another student? yeah? yeah?

-anko is REALLY good for rin because she'll suggest something and rin (who still just goes along with a lot of stuff at this point) agrees. and anko is the first person to realize that rin is NOT a sweet polite little girl she is messed up in exciting new ways. orochimaru is a close second.

-anyways orochimaru's poking around with bodies and stuff and the sharingan letting her take techniques and not having a convenient mask to pull on eventually leads rin to the realization that she doesn't HAVE a "true self" girrrll who would have thought....

-meanwhile kakashi is having Cave Time and through a lot of wheedling and no social interaction besides madara kakashi is convinced to do the infinite tsukuyomi For Konoha. a la danzo. (danzo sakumo hiruzen kakashi essay In Progress lol)

-rin, new, healthier self image acquired, goes on to be Very successful. orochimaru becomes the hokage, rin rotates between his private guard and missions, and everything is dandy!! once again danzo keeps his flirting with hiruzen out of the politics and the uchiha massacre doesn't happen cuz Rin tm and stuff is greatttt!!!

-also naruto is born With incident but its. fine. its fine. kushina dies jiriya who is visiting dies to seal kurama in naruto and its like. sad but who cares amiright

-so right as naruto sasuke and sakura are about to graduate, the politics machine starts working, and like. to Consolidate Power rin is the obvious choice for sensei.

-she goes "ughhh fine ok" and does it and like. its fine. its good.

-...until wave happens!!!!! :D

-fun fact! rin does love people! shes just weird about it. and sometimes she doesn't notice.

-she does beat zabuza and haku on their first meeting because she hasn't been depression napping her way through the past two years.

-but it's still a nasty wake up call, yaknow? those kids could have died! and she would have been... sad? like actually sad?

-rin still preforms on occasion, but she's weird about it in different ways now. and she's pretty sure that she actually likes these kids???

-which is weird and novel but eh. whatever. she'll do her best to teach them apparently.

-sasuke becomes a medic and. this is long and i need to wrap this up but i will elaborate on narrative signficance of this later lol because its there

-kakashi finishes collecting tailed beasts much slower because he keeps passing out (rip) but he does get there eventually

-rin is dodging hokage-ship so that she can keep messing around with her kids. yes they are jounin shut up she's not taking care of them they are her BESTIES. (important distiction that isnt even a lie. she is NOT their mom she is NOT their older sister she is the Cool Older lesbian who taught them the tricks of the trade and now they party together. a ten year age gap is not as big as you guys think it is. you can be friends with old people.)

-anyways eventually kakashi comes for naruto. it goes badly because he is perpetually exhausted and team 7 is perpetually hyped and also no one's even gne missingnin. AND his one cool trick gets countered by rin who can do the Same Cool Trick

-oh also he goes by sukea. hehe sometimes fanon is correct.

-any other version of rin would have gone ballastic but this rin scrunches her face and goes "ok so he is kind of a nohara in the same way that i am kind of an uchiha." thats not whats going on but ok i guess

-rin also kills him (now she is two for two) and madara never even got revived and then everyone just kind of. "that was weird"s the whole situation and goes home.

#hmgh i left a lot out but ive been working on this for a while. and explaining how rock lee dying leads to his entire team defecting #would take too long :C #i will do a deep dive on my tenten thoughts another day. add that one to the list boys #anyways important note that while konoha is the most succesful in this world that isnt'. that doesn't mean that its the best one #this isnt a “good” rin au she is honestly still doing horrific things #just in the name of a more concrete village. sigh.#once i figure out how to make it fun and spicy i might make an au of this au where rin anko and orochimaru Overthrow the Shinobi systerm #because if anyone's making it happen its them.#well. whatever. i think im gonna go ttake a nap im so tired. jet lag >:/

4 notes · View notes

barry-j-blupjeans · 1 year

Text

@taznovembercelebration - Monster

((this is part of a very convoluted werewolf taako au i made very self indulgencey skdlfjs you can find part one here and part two here))

The morning after the full moon began in the same way it always did: Exhausted, achy, and emotionally not all there. It took a few moments for Taako to remember where he was. The walls were a soft, pale blue and there was a window where light was streaming out of the torn-up curtains. There's an uncomfortable feeling in Taako's gut, which is not unusual, just- bad. Very bad, this time.

There was a knock on the door and Taako jerked his head back toward it, already on high alert. The days leading up to the full moon often meant twenty-four-hour of overstimulation. He could hear everything twice as much, smell four times as much, and don't even get him started on taste. The days afterward were very much the opposite. He felt like his ears were stuffed with cotton and right now, all he could taste was dried blood along his mouth.

The door creaked open and Lup peeked her head in.

Lup. Gods, Lup. Taako was an awful brother. He was an awful person, in general, and being a werewolf didn't really help with that. But then he had just- just up and left ten years ago without telling anyone, because how were you supposed to tell the people you had known all your life that you were stupid enough to let yourself get bit by a werewolf? Running away was a much better option. Taako liked running away.

"Hey," Lup said so quietly Taako barely heard, stepping into the room. She had a blanket in her arms. When he and Kravitz had first arrived one night ago, he had already been too fucked up to make any real conversation with her. He wanted to say so much, but- but, but, but. "How're you doin', bud?"

"Just peachy," Taako said. Lup didn't seem to believe him. Taako didn't blame her. She knelt down next to him, looking him over. She got her wand out and tapped it against one of his thighs. He shuddered, feeling the healing spell take over for a moment. Magic and him didn't really, uh, agree anymore. Like, he would, if he had to. But the waves of magic from the spell sent his stomach twisting. Taako pressed his lips together.

"I know," Lup said. "I'll be quick."

Another spell, this time focused on his upper torso, where there was a deep gash across his right shoulder. That one wasn't too bad, he did that literally every single time he turned. The bite being there certainly wasn't helping. Lup's gaze lingered on it and Taako cringed, backing up a bit toward the wall. Lup looked away and passed the blanket to him wordlessly. He wrapped it around his shoulders.

Finally, Lup stood up and offered him a hand. Taako shook his head.

"I'm good," he said with an uncomfortable laugh.

"You're sitting in your own blood," Lup said.

"I'm used to it."

Maybe not the right thing to say. Lup grimaced, but took her hand back. After a tense second when she glanced between him and the door, she sat back down.

"Now you're sitting in my blood," Taako said.

"I'll get used to it," Lup said. Taako's heart clenched. He looked away, curling himself under the blanket. He was so tired. He was always tired after the moon, but gods, it hurt more this time. He wished... well, he wished a lot of things. He wished it hadn't happened, he wished he was better at talking to people, he wished Lup didn't feel obligated to invite him back in because Taako had imagined this a hundred times before, and ninety-nine of them had ended with him back on the streets.

In a stupid, selfish way, he wished that Lup had also got bitten because then, at least, he wouldn't be alone. But Lup would never leave Barry behind, and Barry would never go without telling someone, at least, and eventually, it'd trickle down to where everyone knew, and ughhhhh.

"Taako..."

"I can't right now," Taako said. Lup pursed her lips. "Later, I- I promise. But not right now."

"I love you a lot," Lup said, holding onto his hand. Taako tried not to flinch again. "You know that, right?"

"Yeah," Taako said, feeling so, so small for someone who was a man-eating beast less than an hour ago. "I know."

#taz nc #taz november celebration #taako #lup #taz #taz balance #mine #ise cube writing #werewolf mafia au #dw about the mafia part it's normal and regular #tw blood mention #ask to tag

40 notes · View notes

aphantasia-culture · 2 years

Note

just found this account and as a community starved aphantasiac (i made a whole ass post about it on my blog sometime last month i think) i was so excited to see people having conversations about it here!

i'm a generally creative person and love DnD, so i'm sure i will inevitably send in future asks about how aphantasia affects me in those regards but like, omg the driving directions thing in your topic suggestion post—like, that and having a shitty autobiographical memory have probably been the biggest issues for me in trying to navigate the world while having aphantasia.

i've lived in the same city my entire life (except for college), and i can't tell you where jack or shit is. spoken directions mean nothing to me. i know how to get to like, five places from my childhood home without google maps and that's it, and most of those are walkable distances with only one or two turns. the other ones, i could not actually give you the directions to unless i'm on the road. it literally took me until months after getting my driver's license to realize that two grocery stores i'd been going to for literally a decade were right across the street from each other and also just a block from a strip mall that's just a block from my great grandma's house—and when i excitedly shared this revelation with my parents, they teased me about it because yeah, obviously those places are all close together, how have you never noticed that before?

not being able to form mental maps made me so self conscious growing up, like, a friend's parent would try to take me home from an event and i couldn't tell them how to get to my house even though every other kid could direct the parents to their house, and it crushed my little perfectionist heart that i was so bad at something everyone else did so easily? and then i found out about aphantasia and while thinking about it one day i was like, oh, i'm not actually stupid, i'm just operating at a severe disadvantage in this arena! i literally cannot access the cheat code everyone else uses to make this so easy! it was such a huge relief 😮‍💨

i could probably go on but this is already a very long ask. if you have similar struggles and want to just bitch about them with someone for awhile, my inbox is open! :)

Yesssssss send all the DND asks. Struggling to explain what I needed help with to be able to play DND is part of the reason I created this blog.

I can't drive any newish places without a GPS, and I've been in and out of this area my whole life. I can't even get to the library without gps even tho I've been there before, bc it is surrounded by one way streets and that is just too much for me to keep track of mentally.

I've lost appointments to new places bc they didn't have a map of their college campus size facilities, and no matter what I said, they couldn't understand that Google maps wouldn't be enough.

I had the worst meltdown I've had in years just trying to vote, back in August, bc of how convoluted the organization of voting places is. I ended up wandering around in 3 different places all across town for almost 2 hours only to end up at a place that was 5-6 blocks from my apartment.

I am constantly surprised at how close things are together. Like everything is separate in my mind. Like unless they have the same street on their address, or I have to regularly go to both on the same trip, I will not make the connection.

I have a sneaking suspicion that many of my family has aphantasia but I'll probably never tell them bc that would mean talking to them again.

But like probably almost half, bc it was just common sense that certain people could not be trusted with finding their way anywhere, and so would be at least 20 minutes late to everything. These family members would be described as

"they couldn't find their way out of a paper bag. the light at the end of the tunnel would confuse them as to which way was out"

So yeah, I'm starved for aphantasia community too.

#aphantasia #aphantasia culture

6 notes · View notes

adelle-ein · 1 year

Text

CSP 2.0 features test and rant

I bought my copy of CSP in 2022 due to a variety of Wacom-caused convoluted circumstances, meaning I get the "upgrade" to version 2.0 for free. So, because I enjoy talking about (and shittalking) digital art programs....my thoughts on the "upgrade." To summarize, this update is basically the same as various pre-2022 CSP updates, adding a handful of useful and some godly-sounding features. It doesn't change anything fundamental about the program, really, although allegedly background saves are faster and more reliable now (massive dick move to lock that behind a paywall!) On this PC, I really only get lag on background saves with huge files or if I haven't saved at all for hours, so I haven't really tested that aspect. Other features are: a new brush setting that allows for allegedly more realistic color mixing, a few new 3d model options, an AI auto-shading program, and ~*~align tools ~*~ which really should have been implemented like...five years ago minimum but hey. But, hey, are these features actually as ~life changing~ as Celsys makes them sound? Traditionally no but let's find out

Upon installation I was immediately greeted by said align tools. They were just...there.

Fantastic UI decision I love it. Anyway I couldn't get this stupid window to be part of a sidebar, or treated as a tool, or anything except for a floating window. God knows why it has to be its own "palette" instead of being just a regular tool like liquify etc, but I ended up getting rid of it. figure I'll put it back whenever I need it. It seems to work fine, though in usual CSP fashion it is excessively complicated if reasonably easy to figure out.

And now the new brush color mixing setting (new brushes on the right/bottom). This was the only feature I was personally really excited for. It's something of an improvement and feels a little closer to Krita's infinitely superior painting engines. There are replacements for nearly all of the "thick paint" default brushes, some pastels, and a few assorted others. The "wet wash" brush still lags horrifically at every size even on blank canvases, just fyi.

The updated brushes have the "ver 2.0" tag. And I'm not sure if this was added in a recent update or my own faulty memory, but you can add multiple default brushes from the "add defaults" window now, thank god. I remember having to reopen the damn thing and add them one by one.

I painted this Celica entirely using the new defaults (plus design pencil for the lineart and a custom watercolor for the background, but the painting is all the defaults.) It's definitely a step up, again it feels more like Krita which is my favorite program for painting. Is it worth the upgrade price, though? For me personally, not really.

The head model seems to work well enough, it has settings to let you adjust the features and seems nicer than the various user-made options on the asset store. That being said, using and manipulating the 3d assets is as obtuse and frustrating as ever, and I personally think they make my art look incredibly stiff and robotic, so idk if I'll be using this much.

Just to illustrate how little I use the models, apparently I didn't even have them installed. I had to redownload the entire default asset set to get my hands on them so I could test out the "hand pose" thing. Basically, CSP claims that you can take a picture of your hand and have the model instantly recreate that hand pose. It doesn't look like you can just...use an existing picture. Because that would be too useful. Get posing and upload yourself to the CSP AI instead.

No pictures, because I couldn't get a shot on my shitty webcam without my face in it, but it was unimpressive. The poses were...vaguely similar to the pictures, I guess, but not exactly the pinnacle of accuracy.

This was a straight-fingered peace sign, for example. It's in the general realm of correct, but...not what I was aiming for.

I never use the text tool, for the record - I don't really do comics, and also I hate it. Even with the update, it is still not...good. Better than Krita's, maybe? At least by a bit. But still quite awful. And that's bizarre to me, because this is what was originally *manga studio*, used and promoted primarily by manga and comic artists. But its text tools suck, as well as its general graphic design capabilities.

Trying out the new fog settings...it just looks like a gradient, honestly. I'm not sure why this would ever be helpful. School-live vibes from my little experiment here (i've never watched school-live lol)

Multilayer liquify actually works decently. There's a jolt of lag when you start it and at the end when your changes register, but the actual action of moving your cursor is fairly smooth, unexpectedly. I did it with a huge stack of layers and was pleasantly surprised by the results. That being said, liquify in CSP is really finicky, and even that little bit of lag might prevent it from being a consistently usable tool in my workflow. Not sure yet.

As for the AI shading assist....

I tried a bunch of old .csp drawings and the only one I could even get it to run on was the Eunie above. And it still looked like absolute shit no matter how I messed with the settings. I could have tried to do every layer individually but I just didn't have the patience for a feature I frankly don't want, AND that's not what it was advertised for so I don't see that as a valid test anyway. I just couldn't get this one working, it looks hideous, and I have no desire to have something be shaded for me automatically. Flatting, lineart cleanup, sure! Not the lighting and creativity and stuff that's actually fun! Hard pass.

There's also a fish-eye ruler. I don't see this ever being useful for me because I honestly don't like fish-eye perspective much. Meh.

So...yeah. That's all. That's the upgrade. It's not an impressive upgrade by any means, and clearly just a handful of assorted desirable features Celsys deliberately left out of the last year or so of updates in order to try and bill them as "2.0" now. No significant improvement to the base program, just assorted bells and whistles. And of course, even if you pony up for the flat upgrade fee, you do not get access to any new features going forward. Even if they finally drop a decent selection of filters or make the text tool workable, we plebians will have to pay if we want the goods. And get any features we don't continually pay for revoked.

Wait, how does that work? Yeah, Celsys has been incredibly bad at explaining their bizarre new plans. People have no idea what's going on -- they think CSP is sub-only now, that their copies of 1.0 will be revoked, that everyone's getting 2.0 for free, that they can pay for individual updates they want...nope. TLDR: You can pay a flat price to get version 2.0 now, either as a base program or an upgrade to 1.0. Users who bought 1.0 recently (roughly mid-2022 to 2023, I believe), like me, get that upgrade for free. Alternately, you can pay a yearly or monthly fee to get not only 2.0 but any other continuous upgrades Celsys rolls out between 2.0 and 3.0 (if, say, they add better filtering options or an automatic flatting tool, you must pay for the subscription to get them.) If you at any time end that subscription, ALL updates are revoked and you return to 2.0. 3.0 will be available eventually under the same system. Mmmm microtransaction art program (except worse, you can't even keep your microtransactions and this program ALREADY HAD microtransactions through premium assets to begin with! aaaaaaa why does ibispaint have a bad reputation and not this?)

Also, bear in mind that if you upgrade your 1.0 license to 2.0, you lose your 1.0 license immediately and permanently. 1.0 licenses are for two computers and 2.0 licenses are for one. Reddit confirms that you will be forced to uninstall from one computer if you upgrade the license. So if you have CSP installed on two computers, absolutely do not upgrade, you're essentially throwing away one copy of the program to add a small handful of mediocre features to your other copy. This might be one of the most disgusting parts of the whole deal, actually, because BOY they do not make this clear up front and their little stans are defending it tooth and nail.

So, what's the pricing plan for all this? Um...honestly, I'm not sure. I'm navigating the website right now trying to figure it out and I am totally, utterly lost. The plan is distributed across several pages, and I suspect Celsys is relying heavily on machine translation, so things are...slightly incoherent. I believe it's only $10/year for the PRO (not EX, which is $30) upgrade pass, which isn't unreasonable on the surface, but the "revoke features if you don't keep paying" bit sure is. Not to mention how many user-made assets will be inaccessible to those without the same versions as the creators, or how people's 2.1+ files may break if that person stops paying for their subscription...like, they don't deserve even $1 for pulling this shit and I'm really disappointed by the huge number of users I see not only buying into but defending this awful shit.

Celsys is clearly trying to be the next Adobe, gently easing their users into being forced to go fully subscription-only. We'll see how that works out for them, but I think they are drastically overestimating the loyalty of their userbase, the lack of alternatives, and their rate of use in the professional industry (unlike Adobe, nobody is mandating CSP in graphic design college courses....) They're slowly boiling the frog as we speak -- we'll see how long the userbase can stand it. Personally, I would suggest just waiting for 3.0 - nothing in this upgrade is exceptional, and I wouldn't assume anything else the devs put out for the next couple years is.

TLDR: mediocre update is mediocre, fuck celsys

#csp #txt #lace reviews

2 notes · View notes

gayspock · 1 year

Text

OK not a liveblog per se but i have to SAY THINGS GOSH and im stalling so i dont finish LOL IM SCARED

alright bc thething is i have had my brain shut off for the past few weeks whatever the fuck i havent been in a "lets sit down and talk ad nauseum about it"

whichis such a shame bc LIKE... first bit of s4? i think the opener was bad but a lot of it otherwise middling- HOWEVER AFTER THAT.. GOD THERES BEEN SO MUCH TO SAY SINCE I JUST HAVENT TALKED ABOUT IT

and speaking of openers. i think its kinda funny. premiere notwithstanding, it feels like farscape kinda sucks at openers but literally KNOCKS IT OUT OF THE PARK with season finales. literally. in the thick of it now- but i genuinely think theyve always been, like, so so strong.and thats genuinely so hard to pull off, man.

like im a dw fan and anyways yeah so dw has some of the most inconsistent finales imaginable and it makes me really appreciate a show that CAN do them. like: theyre busy but paced well; its not predictable but its not overly convoluted; theres ups and downs, and theres complications but theyre never contrived.

and i do think farscape has a problem with benching characters and forgetting they exist sometimes but HERE at least they are keeping all of them constantly engaged which is really hard man i do admire it its like..... theres such an ENERGY . like its a proper culmination of events and people coming together and all characters just on their a-game, with a genuinely good story as a foundation. BC ITS EASY ENOUGH TO JUST BRING EVERYONE IN, and arbitrarily up the stakes BUT its another thing to not just... rely wholly on that? which i say again bc you know. doctor who. SORRY TO BE GUY THAT ONLY WATCHES 2 SHIKWS- BUT ITS IN MY HEAD RIGHT NOW, FOR OBVIOUS REASONS.

ANYWYS

i shouldhave tlaked more abt the eps in specific but firstly the lead up to this was crazy like the last part of s4 has been so good.

i loved bringing home the beacon. #jirl power. like for all my reservations about noranti and sikozu (which i'll get into more) i do love likejsut seeing... an episode full of women? which i dontknow that probably sounds stupid but god i jsust feel like... EVEN NOWADAYS, when they do have a lot of women in a show sometimes its just forced and i dont mean that in the arsey way i mean that as in, like, they just put more and more women in without properly developing them and so its just a load of stock characters- BUT HERE, we have a genuine range of girlies here carrying the episode each with their own agency, so theyre capable of having such a good dynamic and LISTEN. DUMB BUT ITS REFRESHING. and i really loved the back and forth with aeryn and sikozu in particular and the more tenuous political situation and their reactions to it and how theyre actually similar but obviously have such different ideas on what to DO here like ougghghgh ... AND THE END. SHEESH. its like- its one of those things where you knew it was coming but BY GOD. THE END OF THIS EPISODE.

and then i really loved a constellation of doubt- love introspective episodes, set before/after the more epic finale-type parts - and how it functions like.. especially establishing john's distance from earth and like... how we STARTED this journey with him so desperate to return to it and you'd think that would be the finale of the show but we've been there and it wasnt right bc hes different now and NOW its about aeryn SHE'S the end goal now baby..................

then my fucking god. prayer was holy shit that was DARK as fuck and like- LIKE YAOI BREAK JOKES ASIDE, like... i fucking loved scorpius and john "working together" like that and the tension and JESUS when FUCKING SCORPIUS JUST.... like that whole alternate world is so fucked up man. so fucking fucked up.

AND THEN- GOD, THE AERYN STUFF... LIKE EVERYTHING I SAID ABOUT JOHN/SCORPIUS, part of me wishes the whole episode was a long and . immersive look into hers but also i sure a sfuck dont because holy fucking shit like... I WAS SO NERVOUS, YOU KNOW, about the pregnancy storyline going into s4 bc with scifi, stories about pregnancy can so easily go fucking wrong and get horrible and uncomfortable if the writers dont do well AND ESPECIALLY if youre going to darker places likethis like jesus fuckingchrist but... i do think they did a good job of like leaivng aeryn in control of her narrative if that makes sense. i think thats my issue otherwise- like again, with dw the worst fucking offender, who barely even let amy fucking reflect on any of that shit when what she went through was a bodily violation compatable to r#pe but WHATEVER uhm - LIKE... obviously aeryn is also going fucking through it, jesus, horrible fucking shit is happening to ehr, but i dont- like im not against that, you know, so long as we do get to see her and we hear her and its not about crichton although his side is important, and its not FOCUSSED on the horror of it in some strange voyeuristic way (although it can be dangerously close to that) i still found it to be about... HER. YEAH? AND SEEING HER PERSPECTIVE. AND god.....................fuckme.............

andits so funny bc liekfor all i said abt loving the ifnale I DONT EVEN KNOW WHAT TO SAY

I DONT I FOR SURE DONT IM STILL IN IT AND MY HEAD IS FUCKING MUSH THATSWHY IM WRITING ALLTHIS

WHEN STARK REAPPEARED- okay firstly. i love the hair so bad. why didnt we get that. BUT LIKE- WHILST SCORPIUS didnt buy it i for sure bought it at first LOL like msotly bc i have always admired farscape for allowing characters to always have quite a lot of nuance, and having their own individual agenda like.. you know what i mean? its like- going back WAY back to the beginning, with dna mad scientist, it'd be so easy to have them all have a firm allegiance to one another BUT NOPE. and here i'd be like- FUCK, MAN, I DONT KNOW. i wouldnt be fucking mad with stark if he wanted to fuck around and just torture the shit out of scorpius after all he fucking went through, you know.

and speaking of agendas

okay sikozu. which can i say? i keep mispelling her name. thats one thing farscape sucks at. the names are good and inventive and pack flavour- but not fucking memorable, in the slightest. frell me. GOOD CUSSES THOUGH THEYRE GOOD AT THAT I KEEP ACCIDENTALLY ALMOST SAYING DREN WHEN MESSAGING PPL. EMBARRASSING. anyway

where was i

FUCKING SIKOZU

i havent continued watching yet but the whole relevation of her and her allegiance to this resistance... right, ok. heres my thing. i really LIKE it, actually, and i have grown to really like her character and i think shes such a fucking interesting person to drop into the cast and has such a good fucking perspective on things and gives good fucking dynamics with quite a few of the existing cast AND i dont hate this storyline with her at all either and i think if itd been established a bit more beforehand or we'd gotten to explore her a bit more beforehand i would have LOVED-LOVED-LOVED her for what she does BUT

its like.. she kind of got introduced weird AND she starkly.. contrasts the kind of sloppy inclusion of noranti and jool? because listen. i just- i cant help but think...FUCK me. i wish sikozu was introduced WAY back in place of jool, since jool kind of did come back around in the end but ultimately i dont think she ever truly found her place in the show or did much constructive, and what she did do sikozu functions as better as AND that extra time could have really better sewed the seeds of this story bc right now it does kinda feel out of nowhere... not completely far-fetched, though, bc i do think it fits for her as she has always been quite cagey and- SHIT MAN. IM REALISING. I COULD REALLY HAVE FUCKING LOVED SIKOZU IF THEYD JUST DONE HER RIGHT LIKE

and its like i said. i did like jool by the end of her run but i dont think she was... im sorry but i dont think she was ever worth it for what she was and i dont think she really DID much. and i think its like an overall problem farscape as a show has HAD since its moved past s1, wherein like... s1 is SO FUCKING GOOD, and so efficient at building characters well and really putting in the work. but as the show grew it kind of struggled to do that whenever they introduced new ppl which i guess is my frustration with it? they dont rlly take the time to work them into it, in the same way, and i guess they really cant do what they did with s1 bc they have more plot to cover but its a shame. i feel like there was a way to adapt better esp bc like i said like- a lot of the time... the new characters were kind of just?? unnecessary?

and its like dont get me WRONG i dont think a character has to be actively doing something all the time. i stand by the fact rygel is an important character. i think he balances them out really fucking well, serves an important function on the ship in terms of diplomacy and DOES give really good moments and different perspectives that the others could not give. but i think thats also like... dependent on him being a reliably well established character within the show and a thing that has been demonstrated over seasons and in PARTICULAR early on and its usually done with good measure

whereas jool was justlike... genuinely downright bad for the first few eps she was there and it doesnt really feel like she WENT anywhere either in the end even though she did improve and its like. -_- cmon bc SHE DID HAVE AN INTERESTING PREMISE BUT EERHGHG...

and i also bring up noranti bc she too is kind of... just drifting? dont get me wrong- i actually do kind of like her. i know im listening to a podcast alongside the show- and omg, the hosts HATE her so bad. i think shes definitely a taste thing, so id assume jool is too to some extent, bc characters like this are BUT... i do admit she really... hasnt added anything?

and sorry to do this. but im relating it back to dw again. you know dan, yeah? dan was pointless. i liked him. i liked what he brought to the show and i dont think what they tried to do with him was bad. and usually im of the mindsetof like... oh well if they had some good moments with him it wasnt BADLY spent but no ehrm... look... it kinds was, man. bc look- his stuff was good, but it wasnt so original or unique, and i do think a comic relief character did balance them out BUT... its still kind of, like, lazy to just make a whole character for that, yeah? instead of just... developing the ones you have and committing to them? kind of slapping a bandaid on it? like- can yaz and 13 not be funny and lighthearted? cant they carry scenes? and was his story of, like, some fucking dude so singularly unique that you had to compromise 13 and yaz being alone and working on their relationship more in isolation?

thats a more drastic example but my point is i dont know. shes nice and she has had moments but i jsut feel like her too its like... shes really not necessary and its just- i become super conscientous fo it when it jsut feels... redundant to have them about when theres a lot of other more interesting things to explore. i think they justkinda... needed a fucking plot device to write them out of stuff with her powders but like- cmon man..

ANYWAY GOD

WHERE WAS I WITH ALL OF THIS

fucking hel fuck me ive lost all train of thought i should fucking ginish the episo-

IM SCAREEED IM SCAREDDD IM SCAREDDDDTHGOGUGHGHGHHG

#Egg.txt #Farscape liveblog

4 notes · View notes

a-pale-azure-moon · 2 years

Text

Midnight Plays Azure Gleam: Preamble

So I've decided to "live blog" my playthrough of Three Hopes (or at least Azure Gleam), just for fun and my own future reference. Before I begin, a couple of notes about my hopes, expectations, and reservations about this game. I've tried to avoid spoilers as much as possible, but I've heard some....things through the grapevine, not much of which is encouraging. I'm trying to keep an open mind, but I have concerns that some of my fears that sprung up when this game was announced are going to be proven right.

This will be the first musou-style game I've played. I've been tempted to try one before but never actually committed. Age of Calamity almost swayed me, but I forgot to pre-order it, and after its reception I am eternally glad I did and saved the 60 bucks. That said, I have a friend who loves the genre and sank hundreds of hours into the original FE Warriors just because he liked it for its dumb fun.

I won't list all of my fears here, but my biggest one is probably in regards to Her Majesty (name withheld to hopefully keep discourse out of here). Her redesign rubs me the wrong way; gone is her badass iron lady look in favor of what's basically an armored sailor fuku, and I cringe at it. I'm worried this game is going to go out of its way to "soften" her. Her writing in 3H was already sexist AF, and I'm preparing for it to be even worse here, because the writers are far more concerned with making her a marketable waifu rather than an actually engaging and interesting villain character.

Similarly, a worry that Rhea will get shafted again, especially since it looks like she's not even playable in the main game? Not promising.

I'm anticipating a convoluted "team up" scenario between the three leaders that'll probably leave a sour taste in my mouth, either because it'll break one or all of their characters, or because said team up will be against the Church of Seiros.

I think those are the main ones. So why even buy this game in the first place when I have such glaring reservations? Um...

As for expectations, well...I don't have many. I realize these games exist primarily for fanservice, and that's fine. Keeping that in mind will help curb whatever disappointments will likely crop up. What I said to my friend when the first trailer dropped pretty much still stands: don't do my boy dirty and I'll probably be satisfied enough.

Related, that specifically means keeping Dimitri (and the others) in character. His mental health issues are hard baked into his character, and if they get shoved aside (or magically "solved") in the name of empty fanservice, I am going to be very angry. Even in a spinoff AU, that needs to be respected.

Since this is a fanservice game, some shipping fuel would be welcome. My stupid Dimileth brain will latch onto whatever crumbs are thrown at me.

I think that covers it. Anything else will come up eventually. I'll have my thoughts on the Prologue and Chapter 1 up shortly.

#fe3hopes #few3h #azure gleam #midnight plays azure gleam #blue lions

1 note · View note

kittybug99 · 3 years

Text

a recipe i found on the internet didn’t work and I feel personally affronted

#it was a cinnamon pull-apart bread recipe #it seems like it used wayyyyyy too much butter #also wayyyyyy too much cinnamon sugar #it's still going to taste good probably #it just won't turn out texturally #I feel cheated out of ingredients #I used up the rest of my cinammon #I have no more cinammon #but now i have like 3 cups of cinammon sugar #because this recipe called for way too much sinnomom #what do i do with 3 cups of synonym sugar???#those were good ingredients #I also wasted like 6 hours of my life on this!#I could have been doing homework #or like #baking something that would have actually turned out #I could have made cookies instead!#I could have been cross-stitching #instead i wasted my time on this god-awful recipe that took 6 hours and is gonna taste good #but i'll never make again because it was so convoluted and stupid

1 note · View note

motownfiction · 2 years

Note

17, 19, 21, 3

3. which 3+ songs would make up a playlist for the novel?

does this constitute a novel or a convoluted soap opera lmfao ... either way, here are the top five songs for the whole group, the whole setting, the whole cast, because there's no way i could stop at three.

my eyes don't cry // stevie wonder: the theme song to the detroit hustle, definitely something they've danced to at every school function and every wedding they've ever been to ... whenever i hear this song, i think of these fictional gen-x'ers i love more than i love myself

pink moon // nick drake: it just feels right. i can't explain!

dirty world // traveling wilburys: "i can't wait to introduce you to the other members of my gang"

my back pages // the byrds: genuinely don't care if it's cliché; it works.

lazaretto // jack white: "i'm so detroit i make it rise from the ashes"

17. pick a color to represent each character.

i'll do the main six.

lucy: red, obviously. she is defined by the passion and the pain of red.

will: blue, because compared to lucy, he's the calm one. also, in her words, "motherfucker looks good in blue."

sadie: green, always. it's welcoming, nurturing, intelligent, and crisp, just like she is.

sam: pink, actually. he's a pink starburst, and i love him truly. also i love how sam's essential color is just a version of lucy's ... the parallels i have inadvertently created and purposefully capitalized upon ...

daniel: gray, and that's not an insult. daniel exists in a gray area, between feeling like he's part of those four above him and feeling like he's one with charlie. also he's a cool color, not a warm one.

charlie: purple, even though that's my favorite color. he thinks he's royalty.

19. which character most fits a character trope? which trope?

time to visit tvtropes ... i'll do one for each of the main six again.

lucy: academic alpha bitch. she is at the top of her class, and she's never going to let anyone forget it, ever. she talks a big game about graduating valedictorian and getting into an elite school from the very beginning. neither of those things happen (bc will is more important 🥺), but she still manages to be this wherever she ends up.

will: insecure love interest. will pretends like he's a badass (and in some respects, i'll say he is), but on the inside, he's not sure he deserves to be adored by anyone, especially not lucy. he's wrong, though. he deserves the world.

sadie: girl next door. i don't mean this as an insult! but the whole point of sadie is that she's everybody you've ever gone to school with and kind of remember liking. she's approachable, she's down-to-earth, and she's there to help you.

sam: obfuscating stupidity. sam typically plays dumber than he really is so that he can more easily get out of things that are too structural and confining, like school and office jobs. he's not a strong speller, but he's just as intelligent as either of his siblings.

daniel: chick magnet. need i say more? sadie was his twelfth girlfriend, and he was only going into the twelfth grade at the time.

charlie: disneyland dad. charlie doesn't have time to raise his children, but he does have enough time to buy them really lavish gifts and say that counts as parenting and love. it doesn't.

21. which character is the best liar? worst?

not to put all the cards on the table, but lucy is the best liar. she lies to herself. denies her feelings, be they positive or negative. minimizes them to the point where she's not sure whether or not they really exist. she can also lie to save her reputation better than anyone in the world, probably.

i think charlie might actually be the worst liar. he wants to be a good liar, but he isn't. he's in such a romantic poet "i gotta be true to myself" mood all the time that he can't misrepresent himself ... not even for the better. h8 him.

#ask games #ponyboyatreides #thank you

2 notes · View notes

gayopinion · 3 years

Note

What’s wrong with fear street? I liked the trilogy, it seemed well planned out and like,, the only loose end I didn’t quite get was why someone decided to curse sam when the one guy was already cursed cuz like in the trilogy it gets established that like every decade and a half or so only one person needs to be cursed to maintain this one family’s deal with the devil or whatever

Like it was convoluted but t seemed well put together? I’m not asking to argue I’m just like, curious about what you didn’t like I guess >~<

"Oh but the decisions were stupid like the whole blood clothes removal and then painting their fresh clothes with the blood, that one guy doing it on his chest??? Did he want to die? Like oh my god just use something else as a target holy fuck" (2/2)

totally fair question bestie. i'll elaborate in full detail why i thought it was bad. ok spoilers below

totally fine if you enjoyed the movie as i see many others did as well! to each their own of course. i haven't seen much negative feedback on it which i just thought was weird because i really did think it was so cheesy to the point that i just couldn't take it seriously. i expect a lot more from netflix than just high production value and good camerawork.

i'm not really qualified to speak so heavily on the whole backstory bc like idk something something hanged witch something something shadyside town curse. don't remember much. i agree that sam herself doesn't rlly do anything to get cursed? all sam did was get a nosebleed and touch the grave. and idk like why didn't she go crazy until the way end if some people go crazy before they die and then come back? right? weird. and yes weird that ryan is cursed already like did he also touch her grave w blood? 😭

also genuinely where was the realism. where are the parents. where were the coaches and band directors like these high schoolers were on roids or something to be acting so hyped up at a VIGIL no less and no one stopped them? like genuinely in what world. and there was like maybe one scene with overhead ceiling lightning and everything else was flickering creepy vibe. calm down set design like we get it it's a horror movie.

i found deena to be pretty annoying like she was just always saying mean or rude comments for no reason so. like what was her deal. and then her friends get pretty brutally murdered near her and she didn't have any reaction at all to that, never is it acknowledged ?? at least from what i remember??? and then her and sam just get back together and it's framed like thats some cutesy ending story like......? your friends are being slandered in the media for prescription drug addiction after both clearly being murdered in an unrelated way and.... nothing? at least josh stuck up for them in the chat room lol. also when c berman called back again she was so rude like for what sorry someone couldn't answer your call right away ...... literally not their job .

and yes exactly with the decision making...... frustrating to see so much critical thinking lacking. she basically was ready to throw an ice cooler out a window at the car following the school bus which. surely would have fucking killed everyone in the car no joke like? at the speed they were traveling? and then that really really fake looking grass/weed where they crashed the car was oh so goofy. like all around it was forest and leaves and then just a 10x10 patch of fake grass i- lol. when they found the bones there that was so...... spirit halloween decoration on a suburban lawn. like it's been 300 years since she was hung there and her bones are just sitting there? and then when they buried them with peters jacket? why lol. and yes exactly with the blood thing. also when kate was like "deena you're literally ready to let us all die to save sam" she was right and that literally happened, deena essentially sacrificed both her friends to save her ex gf which? she apparently ended on horrific terms with. i would pray to god my friends never pull that shit on me. sam was ready to sacrifice herself movie coulda ended there

just some other highlights i found ridiculous (or just off putting enough for me to be like ... what??), even for a slasher movie:

1. hijacking an ambulance and driving it all around town. what did they leave it and all the medical equipment inside just unlocked in the open? and is the school unlocked too? ik this is a common trope so it gets a pass but like, doors get locked irl

2. heather closing the bookstore at night, apparently the only shop in the mall that stays open that late and actually closes and locks up their merchandise?

3. the hospital having 2 employees, one being a really strange nurse lol. also when they walked past an entire group of patients just sitting staring dead at some tv program? have y'all ever been to a hospital

4. josh (or whatever the little brothers name is) and kate kissing in the stall. i found this genuinely inappropriate as he seems to be a freshman and her a senior in high school. no need for that. also why did she ask for help? can she not undo her own bra? just ew all around there. he seems like a child. disgusting

5. deena and sam tryna get it on at multiple points throughout the movie like why are y'all having sex knowing y'all are absolutely not safe. what lol

6. people keeping their bloody clothes on, knowing that it was what was causing them to be hunted. it was genuinely confusing like you said

7. this town had one actual cop, poor dude went on every call and saw all this shit, even tho we see a ton of cops in the background of the hospital massacre crime scene? only he goes inside and investigates like why is he taking every single call

8. everyone going to a "mandatory vigil" in their football, cheerleading, or band uniforms but no one actually??? played or cheered or performed like why was that a thing. and they were literally ready to kill each other on the bus ride back like calm down pls

9. the epipens being used to wake sam up? first off epinephrine is just adrenaline used to suspend anaphylactic shock reaction time to get someone to a hospital. she also used them extremely incorrectly (used no force, did not hold needle inside, struck chest instead of thigh) and gave same like 6x the dosage. instructions are literally written on epipens

again just the delivery of every line was so riverdale so over the top so epic highs and lows of high school football 😭😭 nothing wrong with enjoying riverdale either, but everyone can acknowledge that the writing is a little goofy

also the biphobia. deena rlly did not have to be so weird about sam dating a man. bisexuals exist 🤨 even if she was a closeted lesbian it's the 90s.... have a little sympathy miss girl

i don't often watch slashers i do know they're known for their "girl acting out of her mind" moments and "unrealistic stuff to make the story work" elements but as a genuine horror movie fan who doesn't mind gore i just thought it could've been done in a way that made it seem like the story took place in this universe and not the upside-down lmao

my apologies if i got anything wrong here i didn't have my eyes glued to the screen and i missed some scenes when i went to pee and stuff. but i think enough here is correct to explain why i don't really understand the hype. which might be the real problem - it's been so insanely overhyped that as an indie flick i would give it a pass as a fairly well made movie for resources available but as a netflix slasher i just...... expect more. you are of course more than welcome to still disagree with this and that's fine! if this trilogy was your style then i'm happy for you, twas not for me however. maybe the other two movies are better or make the story make more sense but i don't plan on watching them. 💜💜💜

#long post #ask #anonymous

1 note · View note

erideights · 5 years

Text

Through history to get to you. (1)

Request by @adela-topaz-caelon : Reader's an angel casted out of heaven because, well, she's weird. She's in love with Crowley and, of course Crowley is in love with her. Our poor Aziraphale is just fucking tired of seeing how neither of them realize the feelings of the other.

Part two: here

Pairing: Crowley x Angel!Reader (Good Omens)

Word Count: 3215.

Warnings: none.

A/N: I'm sorry, I didn't wanna make this request in two parts but I was having inspiration problems and... Well. I'll post the second part tomorrow, by the way. I hope you guys like this!

4004 B.C., the day that every christian remembers as the moment when everything went wrong,— when God expelled humanity from paradise and condemned them to an unhappy existence for the rest of their days because Eve bit the forbidden apple and escaped with Adam from the Garden of Eden; yeah, that day—, an angel and a demon were chatting for the first time in their lives, both standing on the top of the east gate wall of that cage of life that the first two humans in history left behind.

They were not friends, oh no, quite the opposite, they were hereditary enemies, but even so, they shared their existential concerns in a calm, friendly tone, typical of those who have known each other for a lifetime.

But they hadn’t know each other 10 minutes ago.

Meanwhile, another of the so many of the angels of Heaven, one expelled from it by her disturbing peculiarities but not bad enough —or so God considered it— to make her fall to Hell, observed from the north gate how his winged companion gave refuge to the vile demon of the first rain fallen on earth, and before she could realize it, she smiled.

Her corners rose in a sweet and tender expression before even being able to stop to think what it meant something like that, holy rain falling on her face, her clothes and her own wings, soaking every inch of her being until there was not a single dry hair.

Y/N was, indeed, peculiar, her way of seeing the world was completely out of tune with the rest of the cold, calculating, maniac and, in a summary, good soldiers of God who didn’t question absolutely anything that is ordered.

She must have fallen with the others, many thought, but she didn’t.

Instead, and because of the obvious discomfort that the playful angel caused in others, God simply and subtly banished her from Heaven, assuring her that her mission on Earth, guarding the North Gate of the Garden of Eden, was much more important than anything else she could do up there.

And that was the last thing God ever told her.

But she couldn’t care less, in fact, she was happy with her fate; she knew that wasn’t her place, anyway. She always knew.

''Hey, Aziraphale.'' Y/N greeted with a melodious tinkle in her voice, appearing out of nowhere and successfully scaring her co-worker. A sweet laugh then echoed in the girl's throat, whose wings swayed with the gentle breeze that ran up there.

''Y-Y/N, please,'' the blond platinum angel begged, right hand positioned over his left lung. ''You need to stop doing that to me because one day my heart won’t be able to take it anymore and the heart attack will send me right back to Heaven. Do you have any idea how much paperwork would be done? Uncountable.''

During his reprimand, the girl watched her colleague with a devilish smirk in her lips, enjoying every word of the dramatic attacks suffered by the former bearer of the flaming sword. But her eyes, inevitably and within a few seconds, went to a specific point on the ground, back to the garden, not too far from the apple tree and there they remained much longer than she would have thought, feeling how her attention was slowly fading away and the voice of the angel deafened with each second of the clock.

As expected, Aziraphale noticed this, but before he could ask out loud, Y/N beated him to it: ‘’Who was him?’’

Him? Was she talking about...?

‘’Crawly’’ he answered, knowing that lying to his extroverted companion was totally useless; she wouldn’t stop until she got the answers she wanted. Anyway, in his voice could be felt a bit of anxiety for that same matter. ‘’A demon.’’

''Oh, well'' her answer was immediate and without thinking, very typical when talking with Y/N. ''He's hot.''

41 AD, soft music enveloped a crowded tavern in some corner of the large and great Rome, warm weather, pleasant atmosphere and its people dressed in sleeveless tunics in pale ochre, white, or cinnamon tones.

Or at least most of them.

Then there she was, sitting on a low wooden bench next to a table not much taller than it, its surface occupied by a distant predecessor of the chess whose pieces consisted of stones and board on a sheet of brown leather.

She wore the typical and loose roman dress, barely fitted in her chest and waist by two thin bands that held the soft textile against her body, but it was in a eye-catching green color, making her stand out —inevitably— from the others.

In addition, her long hair was braided into a hairstyle that resembled one of the many sculptures that capture beautiful goddesses or nymphs of the mythology they so venerated, making her impossible to avoid in the eyes of the others; she was beautiful.

Perhaps the attention of many others was placed on her, a star that seemed to shine with its own light, but she didn’t notice it, her big eyes watching carefully the funny expressions Aziraphale adopted in his face while he decided what his next move would be, and it wasn’t until her friend's attention was scattered, stolen elsewhere —some point behind her— that for the first time, the girl turned around to see.

Sitting on a stool, he was leaning slightly on the bar that separated the woman who attended the inn and the rest of the clients, his voice loud and clear, asking for anything that could be drunk. His body was covered by the typical clothing for men in that time, a tunic that reached to the ground and a horizontal piece held by a golden pin on his left shoulder, but like her, the black color he wore made him stand out from any of the others in the room.

Y/N found herself holding her breath; It was him.

She couldn’t believe she was seeing him again, not after 4,000 years since that day in the garden.

Aziraphale, who since his escape from Eden had spent a considerable amount of time with her, had dropped in some occasions, when both were reunited again after some of the many adventures that the woman liked to live on her own, that he met by chance the —for her— attractive demon, and in each and every one of these times, without missing, Y/N sighed abstracted, assuring her friend that she envied him so much.

It was stupid! A nonsense, feeling her heart beating faster inside her chest when she hadn’t even spoken to him once, when she hadn’t seen the color of his eyes or feel his voice reaching her ears, but the vague memory of the fallen angel on the wall of the garden knocked at her door some nights, and she couldn’t help but wonder what he would be like.

But that was how she was, an angel repudiated by her insatiable curiosity and her uncontrollable range of emotions that, for nothing in the world, she tried to repress or hide from anyone.

So, as expected, Aziraphale, with a small smile on his lips and feeling soft by her friend's attitude —although he didn’t understand it and, at times, even scared him because, for God's sake, he was a demon!— he realized instantly what was happening. "Do you want to come with me to say hello?" He asked in that tone of voice that he used to use when he was with her, full of love and understanding, of empathy and affection for an angel like her. ''I could, I don’t know, introduce you to him'' Aziraphale suggested right away, believing that such an idea would excite her to no end.

'’What?'' Y/N's head spinned so fast it was hard to believe she hadn’t hurt her neck in the process, and even though there was no blush on her cheeks, her expression, her eyes, left to see how nervous a scenario like that made her be. ''No no no no. What would I say? I can’t do it.'’

One could believe a celestial being like her, given her history and extrovert personality, able to get away with any situation and talk to anyone —whether or not she previously meet them—, would never feel embarrassed no matter what. The fact of her being nervous was, simply, unthinkable, but that same day, Aziraphale learned that, in matters of the heart, Y/N felt much more than she was physically and mentally able to endure.

Who knew the reason?

The only thing he totally understood was that the relationship between his friend and that very human emotion called love was so pure, so convoluted in its own way and so latent within her, that for the first time in 4000 years— and with absolute certainty, it wouldn’t be the last— he saw her hysterical, alarmed and a totally loss for words.

Little did she know that, the moment she finally introduced herself to Crawly —Crowley, as he corrected with that deep and velvety voice of his— and didn’t know after what façade hiding those skin-deep nerves that pushed her to play with her own hands and smiling like an absolute idiot throughout the meeting, the demon felt his heart skipped a beat, falling for her long before he could stop it.

Of course, the only one who noticed this was Aziraphale, who from the outside could see with absolute clarity how an angel and a demon smiled at each other, chatted at ease —after 10 minutes in which Y/N didn’t know what to say and Crowley practically had to tear the words out of her mouth— and in their eyes, a strange feeling that they would be shaping during their many encounters over almost 2,000 years for them was reflected, beginning this way an endless torture for Aziraphale.

Nowadays...

‘’Aziraphale.’’ A beautiful voice pleaded, although it sounded more like a warning to the angel who, without stopping, reminded her each and every one of her encounters with the love of her life as if he was the author of a painful love story whose end was still to write.

He was killing her patience.

‘’Aziraphale…’’ She tried again, this time a little louder and lengthening the last vowel of his name, emitting a heavy nasal sigh as her whole body rocked to the rhythm of that same breath.

She was going to explode.

‘’Aziraphale!’’ She exclaimed after a few seconds, seeing that the rest of her attempts were completely useless and that, if she didn’t scream, she would never be able to shut her friend up, who then watched her with eyes wide open and an expression between confused and offended. ''I get it! I fucking get it!'' She breathed, exasperated with the situation almost as much as the angel in front of her. ''But I won’t do it. You know I can’t.''

The blonde snorted, frowned and pressed his lips in a thin line that, in silence, intended to reprimand his friend for her behavior.

And strangely, even though Y/N was used to that mixture of anger and disappointment, he got it.

''Oh c’mon, don’t look at me like that! You know I’m physically incapable. Do you remember that human I was interested in in 1487, Florence?"

‘’You’re talking about Leonardo da Vinci, aren't you?’’

‘’Yeah, him!’’ Oh, everyone remembered those years, when Y/N fell in love with the young, eccentric, faddy and complicated artist and couldn’t do more than talk about him.

At all hours.

All over the place.

Oh, the girl was head over heels for him.

''You know I tried. Hundreds of times. But each and every time I felt a knot in my stomach and my brain stopped working," she apologized, lowering her gaze until she lost it somewhere on the ground, far from the eyes of the angel that only judged her in the distance and in silence. ''Also, it wouldn’t have worked. I'm sure he didn’t like me that way.’'

And there are theories that would refute the young woman's suspicions, such as the rumor that Leonardo da Vinci was homosexual when, all those who knew him, knew for sure he didn’t dislike anything, and enjoyed both female and male company at all hours.

Leonardo's problem, if Aziraphale didn’t remember badly —and he didn’t usually do— was that he was only truly committed to his art, and the moment when perhaps he considered committing himself to someone else —one of his many muses— and shared this thought one night with one of his questionable friends... this one definitely convinced him not to do it.

Aziraphale nipped nervously at his lower lip; he knew the one who convinced the young artist not to take the step with his friend was no one else than Crowley. He could still hear the music of the florentine tavern that night, the voices shouting one above the other and the demon doing what he knew best, manipulating others to dance to his song, assuring Leonardo that love wasn’t gonna do more than hinder his art career.

Jealous selfish bastard, he wanted her for him.

''W-Well, but that was eons ago, my dear. I thought you’d overcome a long time ago from the story with Leonardo.''

''Yeah, I got over it, of course, don’t get me wrong, that's not what I'm saying, '' quickly corrected the girl, raising her eyes again to meet her friend's, catching the guilty look in that ones but deciding to leave it aside and not to ask about it. ''All I’m saying is if I couldn’t do it with him and he was a human like any other who would die after no more than 80 years... How could I do it with Crowley? Just to think about it terrifies me.''

But recapping, he knew his friend had had a partner on more than one occasion. Lasting more or less time, the girl had her fun throughout history; so in summary, her problem was only and exclusively confessing, taking the first step.

It hurted, even physically, because he was literally fed up with watching Crowley and Y/N constantly flirting with each other but at the moment of truth, they both thought it was just a game, a joke, part of their relationship and their personalities, nothing more.

How could they be so fucking blind!?

''I know, I indeed know, the only thing I say is that... the situation has already become untenable. What am I saying? It has been almost 2000 years. But before, Crowley and you only saw each other on rare occasions, once every 30 or 50 years with luck. Now? Almost every day." He reasoned, sighing deeply and calmly and leaning his body a little forward to be a little closer to his friend. '’Besides, you know he’s gonna notice that sooner or later.'' And without thinking twice, the angel brushed the exposed skin behind his own right ear, tearing from the girl's throat an audible gasp, almost like a silent scream.

‘’Shut up!’’ Y/N's eyes quickly scanned the room, panicking, making sure the aforementioned demon wasn’t sneaking around and, instinctively, covering the same ear Aziraphale had touched on himself. ‘’I swear to God If you say anything about it I’ll—’’

‘’I never told him and I promised not to do it in death or life. Your secret is safe with me.'' He assured, amused by the girl's reaction. "But being honest, it's a miracle you managed to hide it for almost 30 years. Someday he’s gonna see it, Y/N, and I can only hope that by then, you have confessed what you feel because otherwise it would be, how to say it? Wild.’’

To understand the conversation the two angels kept in the back room of this small bookshop in London, we must move to the late 80's, when during one of her worst drunkenness, Y/N couldn’t think of anything better than tattooing herself a snake identical to the one Crowley wore on his sideburn, but behind her right ear.

When Aziraphale heard about this the next day, he was absolutely scandalized, asking why. The answer he got? '' Because I know he hates it because it reminds him of Hell but I like it because it's part of who he is and I wanted him to be loved.'' But of course —sober— she knew it was definitely a bad idea and she couldn’t show it to him under no circumstance.

For some odd reason, she didn’t want to miracle it away either, so her strategy during those 30 years was to leave her hair loose and relatively long so he couldn’t see it.

'’Listen, Aziraphale,'' the girl started, turning the curl over again, having had this conversation with her friend countless times throughout her life. And it’s not that she didn’t appreciate his tireless attempts to see her happy and from the hand of the demon that had stolen her heart, it’s that she didn’t believe it was even possible. ''I appreciate what you're trying to do, really, and you know you're my best friend and I'd follow you to the end of the world again, if necessary, but I can’t look Crowley in the eye and tell him I've been in love with him long before the wheel was invented.'' It felt like she was apologizing to him, but anyone would know that the real apology was directed to her heart for not following her feelings and doing what they dictated. ''What I can promise you,'' she rose from her seat after a small pat on her own legs. ''is that I’ll try not to talk to you about this ever again so as not burn your patience so much.'' and leaving a quick kiss on the angel's cheek, Y/N waved goodbye and started walking towards the shop door.

''Thanks for the coffee!''

‘’She’s gonna kill me, isn’t she?’’ Aziraphale's voice rose fearfully, concerned once the bell on the door of the bookshop signaled that his friend had left and slow steps were noticed right behind him, stopping by his side.

‘’Yeah, probably.’’ But the face of the demon showed no concern for the angel, too happy to do anything but bite his bottom lip in order to hide the huge smile that threatened to spread through his face.

He still couldn’t believe all that he’d heard, hidden for at least a couple hours behind one of the huge and crowded shelves of the place.

‘’Well, you better take advantage of the situation so that all the paperwork I’ll have to do if that happens would be worth it, Crowley.’’

#good omens #good omens prime #good omens one shot #good omens one shots #good omens Crowley #Crowley #Crowley x Reader #crowley x angel!reader #crowley x fem!reader #good omens crowley x reader

674 notes · View notes