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#but i'll always be grateful for the time i spent with her
killuaisaprincess · 3 months
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happy new years to the person who stalked and bullied me with their 1,000 plus twitter followers while I had like 30 lol
Stillll was the best thing that ever happened to meeee NOT JOKING
THANKS FOR HELPING ME BECOME MY TRUE SELF ALMOST THREE YEARS BABY OF BEING TRUE ME
AND HAPPY NEW YEARS FOR EVERYONE ELSE LOOK AT THE PRECIOUS BABEY PRINCESS 🥺🥺🥺🥺 I AHHHHHHHH
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#personal#AND THIS WAS MY OG ACCOUNTS#Where I had more followers in the span of a few months vs now where it’s been years#it really proves the numbers aren’t everything#I’m so much happier here as I am now#And it’s so funny it’s thanks to some hater lol who’s account that I know of doesn’t exist anymore#though for all I know they’re dedicated to their cause and was one of the guest anon haters on ao3 till I turned them off#At this point I've spent more time as Qutie than Q by a long shot#I'll always be grateful for her getting me started but I love who I am now#I wouldn't be confident happy me without that asshole it's so funny how they tried to get rid of me but oopsie poopsie#They just made me stronger#It genuinely brings me so much joy to do what I love so much#CUTE KI IN DRESSES GONKI#AHHHHHH#And not have that anxiety loooming over me of wanting to fit in but not fitting in cuz I don't like kg I don't like main fandom#and praying my tag blocker saves me and I will keep silent on some things I like and believe in and#yeah I should apologize in my authors tag for writing too much of my niche of G carrying Ki and yeah#I'm so scared of antis and oh no ect ect I look back at her like whooo#Like whooo are uuu all that anxiety? Now my only anxiety is hate comments and that’s cuz of RSD BUT I WILL NEVER STOP WHAT I LOVE#I'll always be grateful for her but it's funny how in three years I went from no confidence me to someone who I AM MY NUMBER ONE FAN#DAMM I LOVE MYSELF not that that happened overnight but! Was a slow crawl but at the least! FULLY Since 2022 esp end of year! I LOVE ME DAM#And this no confidence thing it goes much further back then my blog too so anon changed my life#It's funny how just one person made me course correct and now I'm the person I am today and I love me I don't know how much time I have lef#But I'll spend it doing the things I love I still get depressed and sad from time to time and think everyone hates me but it's like RSD and#Depression it can't always be perfect but I'm so happy and confident most the time I just love what I do#Anon hate is never right I hate shit with my whole being and I've never once thought hmm let me send hate it doesn't make sense to me#And I still get harrasssed by these antis and some bad apple kg people and they don't offer me shit but a headache so I don’t want moreeee#But it's kinda funny how grateful I am towards this hater literally changed my life thank u if your out there man my lady non binary pal#So yeah I unironically sit back and thank them sometimes#IM SO HAPPY I GET TO DO WHAT I LOVE AND LOVE MY KI AND MY GONKI AND AHHHHHHHH
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xreaderbooks · 3 months
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Asphyxiated | Azriel
Summary: you overhear your mate talking to the inner circle about someone being clingy and annoying, and you decide to remove yourself from the court and your mate to avoid further humiliation.
based on this request
Warnings: language, insecurity, eavesdropping, feeling unworthy, court of nightmares, there's a stalker, some random OC, angst, miscommunication, fluff
Word Count: 2.9k
Azriel Masterlist | Navi | Wattpad | AO3 | Masterlist
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"Azriel," You sing his name as you walk into your secluded home. A decently sized cottage to fit your tall, broad, wide-winged mate, that you designed and built together, just outside the city of Velaris. "Look at what I brought you."
You walk into the sitting room where you and Azriel enjoy each other's company in peace, however rare the occurrence. He appears troubled in his sleep as you've found him lying on his back with his wings spread open and a hand draped over his eyes.  He removes his arm from his face and blinks your way, feeling your presence as you enter the room.
"What do you have there?" His melodic voice makes your stomach flutter in a frenzy as it always does and you hope the bond doesn't translate too much to him, or his shadows, the gossipers that they are.
With a bright grin, you bring the box from behind your back and show him a white box with clear plastic for the perfect view of the treats inside. "Cupcakes," You reply cheerfully, awaiting a grateful response. "Went by the river today and Hilaria was working at the shop you like, did you know she found a job? how great for her!"
Azriel grumbles slightly and your smile falters but you don't let it show, opening the box you move to the couch and sit beside him with the room he gave you tucking in his wings.
"You got my favorite," Az murmurs, carefully taking out the beautifully decorated dessert. You take the statement as a note of appreciation for how well you know him, that much was obvious as you've known each other since birth practically, and in love with each other for half of that time.
He bent his neck down to kiss your cheek and muttering a thank you.
"Don't get too excited now, I heard from Rhys about where you're next assignment is gonna be and I expect a little something when you get back," You tease.
Azriel exhales through his nose and it sounds like a small laugh, "I'll be sure to return the favor if all goes well, love."
"What's wrong?" You ask, the energy in the room has been off since the moment you arrived and you couldn't deny it frightened you a little.
You and Azriel have been going through a rough patch, it happens as often as he overloads himself with work but you have always managed to work through it, it's never too serious mostly the both of you missing each other.
Whenever Azriel was working, you were home, and whenever you were working- he was home. You've spoken to Rhysand about your and Azriel's assignments but it wasn't about when he wanted you both to work, it was simply what needed to be done when it needed to be done.
Both of you being spymasters of the night court, it wasn't ideal to send you both on the same mission unless needed. Most of the time, either one of you or both of you were needed in separate places.
On the days, weeks- if you were lucky- months, that you had 'easy' assignments or days off, you spent it together. You and Azriel would spend time in bed or with your family, going on outings, and trying new things to add to the excitement of life. You loved to be together, your relationship being very sacred to both of you.
"Just tired," Azriel shrugs. You know him better though, something was bothering him that he didn't want to tell you.
You felt his frustration through the bond, you wanted to help him but knowing Az he'd tell you when he was ready.
~~~
"-the fucking shop, I mean honestly how close is she trying to get?"
You didn't mean to eavesdrop. Originally you were coming by to talk to Rhys and Feyre about some of the rumors going around the court of nightmares, nothing too concerning but something that needed to be checked on the next visit. When you heard the muffled voices in the townhouse sitting room.
"Perhaps if you spent less time with her?" Mor suggested.
You couldn't think of anyone else Azriel might be spending time with if not for you. Did Azriel want to spend less time with you?
Your brain immediately jumps to conclusions, Azriel has been in his thoughts as of late, and he hasn't told you what's been bothering him. You thought it had something to do with the distance, perhaps a lack of communication. It was putting a strain on your relationship but you didn't think even more distance was the answer.
Azriel shakes his head insistently, "I don't spend time with her, ever. She finds me somehow, it's maddening and I can't tell Y/n to stay away while I figure out how to solve this, she's always just there."
It was like a dagger in your heart. If you were always there it was because you felt like you never spent time together, how were you supposed to have a relationship if you were never together?
You thought for sure, Azriel felt the same.
"She is a bit clingy," Cassian nods. You felt another pang in your chest, Cassian who was your partner in crime, Mor who was your favorite person to talk to about anything, and your mate had all agreed that you were too much.
"A bit is a bit of an understatement," You heard Feyre chuckle.
You almost couldn't believe what you were hearing, your fault for listening to a conversation you weren't privy to you suppose but you would've never guessed your family felt you smothered them.
Perhaps you were too clingy, you were over at their house every other day. You felt like you were dividing your time between the people you loved, maybe they didn't want you there, and you were an imposition on their daily schedule. You felt embarrassed and humiliated that they were in a meeting to discuss what to do with you.
"I can talk to her if need be, brother," Rhysand gives Azriel a reassuring nod.
Azriel shook his head, "No, no need. I will speak with her, it's my relationship, my responsibility."
Cassian snorted loudly, "Your need to fix things yourself is admirable brother, truly. Let us pray that this will not dig you a deeper grave."
You didn't hear the rest, didn't need to.
Silently, you slipped out the doors of the townhouse. You didn't want to lose your friends so if they wanted space- you'd give them space.
~~~
You disappeared for the rest of the day, and the next. You left a note to Azriel so he wouldn't worry- not that he wouldn't appreciate your shared home now all to himself. You still had your apartment in the city that you rented out when you moved in with Azriel.
There were currently no tenants as there were renovations to be done.
You avoided your room at the townhouse knowing you weren't as welcome as you thought. You didn't show up to training with Cassian and Azriel that morning. Instead, you met informants and did some investigating yourself.
You sent a letter to Rhysand with details on the Hewn City problem, told him that he should look into it as soon as possible, and asked if he wanted you to get a handle on it instead.
He replied with a note giving you thanks and telling you that he'd deal it himself but would call on you with the rest of the inner circle when the visit would happen.
Days passed by until it had officially been a week of no contact. Azriel had sent you letter after letter requesting to see you. You denied them all with sweet words to show that there was nothing wrong, that you didn't overhear what they said about you.
Where'd you go - A
Miss you -A
Come back, our home feels empty without you - Azriel
Are you alright? - Desperately need to see you, Az
Several letters with pleading undertones, each one more than the last.
Then letters from Cassian about training, you reassured him that you were following the usual routine. Mor had invited you to Ritas one night and lunch another day- you declined both with excuses of having too much work to focus on anything else. You didn't realize how much they felt it was an obligation to do things with you.
Eventually, the time came, and Rhysand called on you for the visit to the court of nightmares. You were anxious at the thought of seeing them again, maybe as time passed they would feel better with you around now that you gave them space.
~~~
You dressed appropriately for the setting, your leathers, and weapons strapped to your body. The scowl was natural as you hated being here, glares sent to everyone who looked your way, intimidation being the only way to survive this gods-forsaken place.
Bowing in front of Rhysand to fit the narrative, Feyre sent you a curious as you bowed to her, you felt her stroking the inner walls of your mind- a request to enter. You shut her out with strong mental walls, standing once she allowed you, and took your place next to Azriel, slightly behind him and Cassian.
Azriel's eyes followed you, he tried to brush a finger against your hand as you passed him but you clasped your hands behind your back. Through the bond, you felt a sting in your chest. You spared a glance at your mate, you missed him so much your body craved to be near him but you resisted.
It went as well as it usually did, a dramatically villainous speech from Rhys, with some added threats to those opposed to his reign. The High Fae in attendance got drunk on Faerie wine and danced with the whole night ahead of them.
Azriel attempted to talk to you over his shoulder, "Are you upset with me?" He muttered to you with a crease on his forehead.
You shook your head, "No, why would I be?"
"Where've you been?"
With the few looks you've gotten of his face he looked stressed, circles under his eyes, his hands were clenched and you could tell that it was to keep him from fidgeting.
"Now is not the time," You told him, straightening when you saw a reveler get too close to the High Lady.
"We're done here anyway," Rhysand's voice echoed in your mind. You didn't doubt Azriel heard him as well. You took your leave, Azriel right behind you, he caught up so quickly he held your wrist you didn't notice until you felt the world shift and you realized he traveled you both to your cottage home with his shadows.
Azriel had stood in the same spot he landed while you backed away from him a couple of steps.
"You've been avoiding me," A statement. It was heavy with questions, with want of information you didn't want to divulge.
You asked one of your own, "Have you watered the plants?"
"Have I watered the plants?" He scoffed out the last word. "I've barely been able to function without you, Y/n."
You flinched although he didn't yell but the tone in which he spoke felt like he was scolding you.
He continued, "Yes, I watered the plants."
A weak smile was pulled out of you, he probably loved those plants as much as you. You weren't as much a gardener as Elain but you managed a small garden of your own, they were like yours and Azriel's children, something you both grew together. A garden of both of your favorite flowers and fruits and vegetables.
"Seems like you've been functioning just fine," You responded in a smart tone, it just slipped out.
"Tell me what I did, please, it's driving me mad." He stepped in your direction, shadows reaching to touch you, and you saw Azriel forcefully reigning them in like he wanted to reach for you too.
You softened at the sight, "It's not something you did, Az."
"Something I said, then?" He didn't refrain from fidgeting now, in the comfort of the home, he fidgeted with his fingers. "Something I didn't say, I know I didn't want to talk about what was happening before, but I'll tell you whatever you want me to if you promise not to leave again."
You just about melted, you felt yourself wanting to sway at his beseeching. "What was happening before?" You questioned in barely a whisper.
"Hilaria happened. She- Nothing happened- I swear to you, she grew attached. She grew attached to me," He grimaced as he said it. "She was everywhere I happened to be, it wasn't normal, I've warned her off so many times I was glad you didn't notice. I didn't want you to be uncomfortable with her. The moment she got a job at the sweet shop, she got too close, you went there and I knew it wasn't a coincidence."
Azriel had a fucking stalker and you didn't know about it. That was what he was so stressed about. Hilaria- an Illyrian female who had a shitty life, Azriel had given her refuge, because she had no family left to care for her, and a female alone in that camp was no place to be.
You helped Azriel find her a living space, and gave her safety for her to heal from the traumas, she must've mistook that for something else entirely. You couldn't help but to feel bad for her.
"I went to Rhys, he and the others offered their advice and I tried to talk to her about her behavior. She didn't take it well, so we sent her to Dawn court with the assurance that they would do all they could to help her."
"You talked to the others about this?" It all made more sense now. 
He nodded.
"Did Cassian say she was clingy?" You needed to be sure you were getting all the details now.
His brows furrowed, "How did you?"
"Because I was there when you were talking, but I didn't know you were talking about Hilaria." You sat on the couch slowly, forearms on your knees, hands clasped.
You laughed incredulously, slapping your hands to cover your face and running your hands into your hair. "I thought you were all talking about me."
"What?" Azriel's eyes were on you, deciphering your words when he pieced them together. "Why would we ever?"
"You weren't telling me anything about what was going on, I thought I was prying too much, I do spend a good bit of time with everyone, it wouldn't be too far off."
A smile tugged on his lips, one he was trying not to show. He was trying not to make you feel foolish but it was too late. "I love you, but this was not your wisest moment."
You grabbed a pillow from the couch and threw it at him with little force, "Az!"
"You had everyone concerned, they thought they had offended you in some way."
"Of course not!" You shook your head in disbelief, at how easily your insecurity took over.
"Now my family has some attachment issues, you couldn't get rid of them if you tried, you would probably want space from them yourself."
You rolled your eyes knowing them all too well, centuries with them and you still felt undeserving.
Azriel kneeled in front of you taking your hands in his and settling them on your lap then caressed your face in his hands. "I could never not want you near me, you're everything to me, understand?" His hands gave your head a gentle shake in emphasis.
"I don't think you understand where my mind was at the moment," You avoided his gaze. You didn't want him to know, the feeling of not being worthy enough for him, how you compared yourself to everything in his past and it didn't seem plausible for him to accept you. When he did accept the bond, it was the greatest moment you ever had the pleasure of experiencing.
Azriel was the love of your life, with and without a bond. It was hard for you to accept that he loved you without it if it wasn't for the fact that you trusted him to tell you the truth. He came to you and confessed his love and then the bond happened. You would have continued to pretend you weren't in love with him, otherwise.
"Do you not understand," Azriel sighed, "Do you not understand my love for you, at all?"
"It was easier to believe that you needed space from me," You confessed, shutting your eyes tight. Warm lips landed on yours, you were startled for a second before reciprocating the kiss.
He kissed you breathlessly, a minute, two or three- you didn't know how much time passed. Your blood pulsed in your ears, or was it his? it was rapid and created an electric current in your veins.
"I want to drown in your love, to be asphyxiated by it until all I know is you, in this life and after. I could never get enough of you." He whispered the promise on your lips with his eyes closed. You nudged your nose against his to open his eyes.
The warmth of his hazel eyes graced you and you murmur his name, he nudges your nose in response. "I love you."
Hours into the late night, after Azriel insisted on a bath together, you had a late-night snack nuzzled on the couch catching up on the lost time. You whispered sweet nothings to each other in bed with limbs entangled, and long-lasting kisses.
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joelscruff · 11 months
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feelings on fire (joel miller x f!reader) 18+ PART ONE
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"trying to play it coy, trying to make it disappear"
⚠️ new series alert! ⚠️ and also my 1k follower celebration!!! (altho it might as well be the 2k celebration now considering how fast my following has grown. thank you ;-;) i polled my followers a little while ago to choose between 3 different fic premises and this one was the winner! it was originally meant to be a stand alone but i'm actually more interested in making it a brand new series, so i hope you guys enjoy! i'm not exactly sure how many parts this will be yet, i'll let you know when i do. title and lyrics are from 'bad liar' by selena gomez.
summary: you're back from college for the summer, staying with your devout catholic parents in your childhood home while they order you around and try to keep authority over you. as an act of rebellion you ask your new neighbor mr. miller to teach you how to play guitar, but it turns out there's a lot more he wants to teach you. (no outbreak, no use of y/n) rating: 18+ explicit (minors, do not interact) warnings: (for this fic in general) age difference (reader is in her 20s, joel in his 50s), innocent/inexperienced reader, dirty old man joel, corruption (but it's consensual), praise kink, dirty talk, general smut, mentions of religion (reader's family are very catholic) -- (for this chapter) wet dreams, mentions of masturbation. word count: 5k ao3
The sun is warm and pleasant on your bare skin as you lay out in the freshly mown grass of your backyard, absorbing the heat and smiling languidly despite the humidity. You're grateful for your family's wealth on days like today, knowing that at any moment you could take a few steps and dive headfirst into the cool water of your pool, fresh and inviting. It's been about a month since you returned and you've spent almost every day outside among the green grass, the chlorinated water, the burning Texas sun. It's been heaven.
The backdoor suddenly swings open and your father's voice booms out into the backyard, "Family meeting," he states, loud and serious, "Five minutes."
Or hell.
With a groan you slowly sit up, hands digging into the thin towel laid out beneath you. You know better than to ignore an order like that. Being back from college for the summer has certainly had it's perks; no annoying roommates, no loud parties, a large backyard and pool to yourself, but having to deal with your parents again certainly isn't one of them. You'd thought coming back after three years might have softened them a bit, lowered their guard, made them less strict. Instead, it's almost had the opposite effect.
You slide into your flip flops and walk begrudgingly inside the house, making note of your mother standing anxiously by the stove with her arms crossed. What's the issue now? At least once a week your father calls these "family meetings", which always pertain to you and only you, seeing as you're their only child. Last week they'd spent half an hour berating you about forgetting to put the garbage out, the week before they'd tried to explain the importance of an early bed time to you, like you were seven.
You're a grown woman, a full fledged adult. Sure, you're only twenty one, you're unemployed, you're currently in the process of obtaining an arts degree that probably won't secure you anything tangible in the real world, but you're an adult nonetheless. You only have one year left of school before you can leave all this behind and start fresh somewhere else. You'd thought coming back home for one more summer would bring nostalgia and happiness, a few months of normality before life exploded in front of you.
Turns out your parents had pictured something different.
Your father gestures toward the kitchen table, urging for you to sit. You hate when they do this, make you feel small and childish while they both stand above you and reiterate rules they've had your whole life, rules that apparently you'll never grow out of. You wonder what rule you've broken now.
"We've noticed that you barely leave the house," your father begins, voice deep and authoritative, "We were under the impression that when you came home you'd be spending time with old friends, doing some volunteering again."
"Going to church," your mother adds beside him, a frown permanently etched on her face, "You've only gone twice since you've been here."
Call the cops, you think to yourself, forcibly holding back an eyeroll. Ironically your father is a police officer, and you highly doubt he'd ever come if you called.
"Instead, you just spend all your time in that backyard," he continues, nodding along with your mother, "We didn't invite you back to simply laze around all summer, there have been clear expectations you're not meeting."
You take a deep breath, feeling a hint of anger and stubbornness burning in the pit of your stomach. You shove it down, back to that secret hiding place you've cultivated throughout all these years of having to deal with them.
"I'm sorry, dad," you say, trying to sound as earnest as possible as you look to him and then your mother, "Sorry, mom."
"Sorry doesn't cut it, we need to see action," your father replies quickly, brow furrowed, "No more lounging around in the backyard on weekdays, that's a weekend activity from now on, we clear?"
You nod, "Clear."
"We want you to get involved in something," your mom takes a step forward, places her hand awkwardly on your shoulder, "Why don't you call Bethany? She's always looking for more helpers at Sunday School, or maybe Alice? I hear she's been volunteering at the soup kitchen for the summer."
You haven't spoken to either Bethany or Alice since you left for university three years ago. The thought of calling them, let alone having to work with them in either setting, makes you feel ill. You nod again, pretending to agree.
"That sounds good, I'll call them tomorrow morning," Both of your parents smile, appeased, "I think I'll go for a walk now, if that's okay. Clear my head, think about things I can do to improve."
"That's the spirit," your dad says, wrapping an arm around your mother, "Remember, be back before dinner or the door will be locked."
"I know," you nod, forcing a smile, "I won't forget."
--
Well, that's it, then. You'll have to leave.
It sounds dramatic to say that your parents telling you to get off your ass is enough to send you packing, but it goes so much deeper than that. You've spent your entire life doing everything these people say, nodding and smiling when you're meant to, apologizing for everything, doing anything you can to appease and impress them. You'd spent your high school years in youth choir, church group, organizing fundraisers, studying your ass off, tutoring, joining as many extracurriculars as possible until you had no free time. And even then, nothing ever seemed to be enough for them.
When you'd left for college they'd both cried at the airport, held you in their arms and told you with sincerity that they'd miss you so much. Your mother had kissed your face and held your hands and your father had hugged you for the first time since you were eleven years old. And because of their sudden burst of emotions, of affection, you'd actually missed them once you left. You remember you'd cried on the plane, scrolling through pictures of them on your phone until the battery died, thinking to yourself that maybe they weren't the horrible, authoritarian people you thought they were.
They called you once a week while you were at college, asking for updates, telling you they missed you, giving you neighborhood gossip that made you laugh and feel nostalgic for home. Being away from them, it was like they suddenly became two entirely new people, bonded together by their suddenly empty nest and seemingly trying to do right by you now, even if it felt a little too late. You'd thought about coming home a few times for a visit, but the memories that triggered the anger in the pit of your stomach kept you from doing so. You'd kept them at arm's length until you felt ready to come back.
And now you're back, and nothing has changed. They're the same people they always were, expecting too much of you, thinking they can control you, never quite believing that you're trying your best. You'd told them before you came that you just wanted to relax this summer, spend some time at home, maybe meet up with some old friends - keyword being maybe - and they'd seemed totally on board with the idea. There had been no mentions of keeping busy, no mentions of Sunday School or soup kitchens or rules. Then you'd arrived and realized how stupid you'd been to believe that they could ever change.
Your entire life you've been their perfect girl, their A+ student who volunteered and read bible verses and tutored the neighborhood kids, sacrificed your happiness more times than you can count for the sake of keeping them satisfied. But that's the thing: they're not satisfied, and they never will be.
Your flip flops smack against the concrete of your suburban street, sun beginning to set in the distance as you think about how exactly you're going to escape this hell. Yeah, you could just walk out the front door without a word, but it's not like you have anywhere to go or the money to do it. You have your plane ticket for your return flight back to school, but it's not 'til September and it's under your father's name. Your family might be wealthy but none of that wealth has ever gone directly into your pocket, and you doubt it ever will if you just bail on them in the middle of the night with no warning.
Your thoughts scatter when you hear someone call out your name nearby. Your head swivels and you see one of your neighbors, Mrs. Lillard, waving from her front porch. You wave back, give her a small smile.
"How's college treatin' ya?" she calls to you, taking a sip from a bottle of beer, "Got a boyfriend?"
Your cheeks warm immediately and shake your head, "Not yet!" you call back.
"I bet you're battin' 'em all away," her voice is slurred and you're sure that's probably not her first beer of the day, "Nobody's good enough for ya, huh?"
"I guess," you say awkwardly, continuing to walk and hoping she won't ask you to join her for a beer, "How's your husband?"
"Pain in my ass," she responds with a grunt and takes another swig, "Bet you can't wait to have your own white picket fence, perfect as you are."
Her words make you uncomfortable but you just give her your signature fake laugh and flip your hair, waving again, "Bye, Mrs. Lillard."
Your face falls as soon as you turn around, anger burning again. You've spent so much of your life being the picture perfect little suburban girl, doing everything your parents say, saying your prayers and reading to the elderly, killing yourself to get straight A's and only speaking when spoken to. Your reputation is widely known around the neighborhood; the sweet little girl, the pure and innocent God fearing angel. You've portrayed yourself as that girl for so long that you almost don't know which part of you is real anymore.
You keep walking down the street, eyeing the sunset as you go and wondering what would happen if you just didn't go back home tonight. As your father had said, he locks the door every night after dinner; you don't have a key, you've never had a key. You're only allowed into your house on the basis of trust and good merit. If you just refused to go back tonight, how would they react? The thought of doing something like that sends a warm flush of rebellion across your skin, eyes bright with intrigue. But where would you go?
You turn the corner and your nose is suddenly hit with the delectable scent of a barbecue, smokey and delicious. You slow a bit, closing your eyes and breathing in the warm air, stomach growling. You suddenly realize that if you don't go home tonight you'll also miss dinner. Another rule broken. You keep walking, trying to follow the scent like some kind of bloodhound. Maybe you know whoever's cooking and they'll invite you to eat with them.
A few houses down you start to hear the sound of music. There must be a party going on, a birthday or some other special occasion. It's only as you get closer to the sound that you realize it's not being played from a speaker or stereo, but from someone's front porch; a real guitar, live and acoustic.
You approach the house in question and see a man sitting on his front step, guitar in hand as he strums a steady tune. He's looking down, watching his fingers, monitoring his movements, but you see dark brown curls with hints of grey peppered throughout, a stubbled jaw line and curved nose. You slow your speed, furrowing your brow as you try to place him. You're not sure you've ever seen him before.
His music is calm and inviting, a plucky sounding tune that seems vaguely familiar. You're suddenly filled with intrigue, trying to place the song and slowing to a complete stop in front of the house without meaning to. You watch the man's callused fingers pick away at the strings, fast and professional, like he's been doing this for years. He probably has.
You're still trying to place the song, biting your lip and swiping through songs in your mind like an invisible rolodex. Johnny Cash? Bob Dylan? It sounds like one of those songs your parents would forbid you to listen to as a kid, the ones with devil worship in their lyrics, sung by bad men who didn't believe in God. You'd always questioned this logic, wondered how songs about living out in the country or falling in love could be inherently against your religion. They didn't even listen to it, just blindly told you it was against the rules.
Suddenly the man stops playing and you realize the song has come to an end. He looks up then, notices you standing there at the end of his walk with your furrowed brow and flip flops. His eyes are brown, expression startled at first but then fading into something softer as he gives you a small smile.
"Been there long?" he asks, voice crackling slightly, like he hasn't spoken much today.
You shake your head quickly, "I'm sorry, I heard you playing and I-"
"S'alright," he replies strumming his guitar absentmindedly and giving you a shrug, "I don't mind an audience."
He's southern, definitely a Texan, but you're sure you've never met him before. His face and voice are unfamiliar to you, but certainly not unwelcome. He's older, probably in his 40s or even 50s, but he's handsome and slightly boyish in a way despite his greying hair and freckled skin. He reminds you of one of those men on album covers your father had slammed down one day in the record store when you were nine, yelled at you in front of everyone that the men who made that music were filthy sinners. It hadn't stopped you from listening to them, though, curiosity getting the better of you.
Is that who you're looking at now? A filthy sinner?
"You okay?" he asks slowly, tilting his head. You realize you're just staring at him, gathering your thoughts.
You shake your head again quickly, feeling yourself blush under his gaze, "Sorry," you repeat, "I'm uh, I was just passing by and I heard you playing that song. It sounded really familiar."
He gives you a crooked smile and a nod, "Tangled Up in Blue, Bob Dylan."
"I knew it was Bob Dylan," you say, a satisfied smile spreading across your face. That song was from one of the albums you'd listened to in secret, one of the only times you'd had to delete your browser history. You feel pride swell in your chest at the smile you elicit from the man in response, like he's recognizing a fellow music lover.
"Good ear," he continues to lightly pluck at the strings of his guitar, "You play?"
"Um, not really." It's a half truth but mainly a lie, you've never played in your life. You feel slightly disappointed in yourself and you're not sure why; it's not like you've ever felt any kind of urge to learn, especially considering your parents would've made sure you only learned appropriate songs. When would you have even found the time between all your extracurriculars?
"Well, it ain't difficult," he starts playing the song again, slower this time, "Pretty repetitive chord progression, room for some adlibbin' here and there once you get the hang of it."
You nod like you understand what he's talking about, suddenly lost in the way his fingers pull at the strings, make the music come to life out of nothing. His hands are big, fingers long and thick as they curve back and forth, up and down. It's hypnotic to watch. He stops again and looks up, catches you staring.
"How old are you?" he asks, raising an eyebrow.
You swallow, unsure what exactly the right answer is. Part of you wants to lie, tell him you're older than you actually are so he doesn't just see you as some bright eyed kid. This is the first person you've encountered since coming back who doesn't know who you are, doesn't know about your reputation. You could tell him anything, be anyone, and he'd take it at face value.
"I'm twenty five," you lie, but it sounds unnatural in your mouth.
He looks you up and down, eyes raking your body in a way you're unfamiliar with. Like a man. Like the way your roommates back in college get looked at, sensually and flirtatiously, being eyed up by drunk guys at the bar who only have one thing on their mind. You feel your heart begin to thrum quicker in your chest; is that really how this man is looking at you? This grown man, not a high school crush or a college fratboy, a real man?
"Sweetheart, we both know that's a lie," he says with a chuckle, eyes coming back to rest on your face, "I'd guess twenty."
You make a face, "I'm twenty one, actually."
He laughs again, putting his hands up in surrender, "My bad, twenty one."
You watch as he starts to strum once again, something new and unfamiliar. You listen for a few moments, eyes trained back on his fingers, watching him play.
"You wanna come in for a bit?" he asks, voice nonchalant, like he's asking you something completely casual.
And maybe he is, but the words make your eyes widen, your breath catching in your throat. The way he'd looked at you just then, laughed at your words, wanted to know your age... now he's inviting you into his house? You've never actually been flirted with before, not when it mattered, and you're not entirely sure if that's what's happening. But it feels like it, even though you can't imagine how someone like him could see anything sexy about a girl like you.
"...Why?" you ask quietly.
He looks up at you with another smile, still plucking the strings, "If you need to ask then maybe I read you wrong," he chuckles again, eyes trailing down your legs and taking in your short dress, the way it stops at your knees, "Now that I really look at you, maybe I'm talkin' to a good Christian girl."
"You're not," you say it too quickly, "I mean, I'm not. I'm not a good Christian girl."
"No?" he smirks, "Don't have a good southern daddy waitin' for you to come home? Momma waitin' with a pie in the oven?" he's not being serious but you feel your skin flush at the accuracy of his words.
"Maybe," you mutter, hand going down to touch your dress nervously, "But maybe I don't wanna go home."
He nods and stops plucking, licking his lips and thinking to himself. You have to admit, there's something about him that draws you to him, something masculine and new. He's much, much older than you but not in a way that creeps you out or makes you want to run away. You find yourself hoping he'll ask you to come inside again so this time you can give him the right answer, the one he wants to hear.
"You probably should," he finally says, then stands up on his porch steps and slips his guitar onto his back. The strap digs into his broad shoulders, accentuating his size as he suddenly towers over you on the step.
"Sh-should what?" you ask breathlessly, and you wonder if he can tell your heart race has picked up, see the thumping of your pulse in your exposed neck.
"Go back home," he says with a shrug, "I mean, if they're waitin' for you..."
"They're not," you say it with firm finality, shaking your head, "I'm twenty one, I do what I like."
He walks down the steps then, getting closer and closer to you until he's suddenly standing directly in front of you. His eyes cast downward, assessing your expression; you swear he looks at your lips and licks his own again.
"So would you like to come inside?" he asks again, peering down at you with a dark sense of desire that makes you swallow roughly, feel a light and steady thrum between your legs, "Let me teach you how to play that song?"
Here's your chance. Just say yes.
"N-no," you gasp, taking a step back from him, "Um, n-not today."
He smirks, almost like he knew that would be your response. He hitches his guitar up his shoulder and gives you one last smile before turning around and walking back up his steps.
"Well, I'm here if you change your mind," he calls back to you, reaching for the doorknob on his front door and peering at you with another side glance, still assessing you, "Would love to teach a pretty thing like you how to use her fingers."
You feel your lips part in surprise, an unfamiliar tingling sensation flooding your body as he gives you a wink and walks into his house, shutting the door behind him. You've still got that steady throbbing feeling in your underwear, something you've only felt a handful of times. You know what it is, you're not completely clueless, but you can't remember the last time it happened.
You take another step back slowly, heart still pounding in your chest as you stare at his closed door. Then you turn on your heel and speed walk back the way you came, flip flops slapping against the ground aggressively. You revel in the way your thighs rub together as you walk, soothing that ache.
Any thoughts of not going home have gone from your mind. You need to ask your parents who this man is. As soon as possible.
-
You get home right before dinner, giving yourself just enough time to formulate exactly how to ask your parents about the man with the guitar. You're slightly afraid that you might seem too eager, too curious, and that they'll see right through you; you can't imagine how they'd react to knowing their perfect little girl is getting butterflies over a middle aged man.
But that's what you have: butterflies. In your tummy, all over your skin, between your legs. Being talked to the way he did, being looked at the way he did, it's making you feel hot all over, itchy and uncomfortable but in a good way.
The last time you felt this way was during your first week of college, at a party you'd gone to with your roommate. You'd seen him across the room, tall and blonde, watched as he licked his lips and looked you up and down. He was gorgeous, an angel you were convinced God had placed at this party just for you. You felt that tingle between your legs, swallowed down the nervous lump in your throat and imagined what it would be like to be kissed by him.
Then he'd approached and you realized he'd been looking at your roommate the entire time.
Your mother is just beginning to plate the meal when you slip into the kitchen, taking a seat at the table beside your father. She serves you both with a smile and sits, then extends her hands to both of you.
"Bless us, O Lord, for these, Thy gifts," she begins quietly, and you quickly hang your head and close your eyes as she continues, "which we are about to receive from Thy bounty. Through Christ, our Lord. Amen."
"Amen," you and your dad echo, then begin your meal. Just the same as always.
"How was your walk?" your father asks.
Here goes nothing.
"It was nice," you say, nodding thoughtfully to yourself and hoping you sound nonchalant, "I said hi to Mrs. Lillard."
"We've been praying for her," your mom interjects immediately, "She's an alcoholic, you know."
Your mom stays on top of all the neighborhood gossip, part of the reason you feel she might know something about the mysterious man. With a nod of your head you continue, "And then I saw someone else, a man playing guitar on his front porch, but I've never seen him before."
"Oh, him" your mom rolls her eyes, "Mr. Miller. Piece of work."
Bingo.
Your eyebrows raise, intrigued, "How so?"
"Kindness, dear," your father says with a disapproving nod to your mother, "He's done nothing to us."
She sighs and shakes her head, "You're right, I'm sorry."
The conversation is definitely going somewhere but it's already taking a turn into dangerous territory; you're not one to question, to interfere or interject. Pressing them further might make them suspicious, but you have to know.
"What did he do?" you ask, trying your best to sound casual, "If you don't mind me asking?"
Your mother is about to speak but your father gives her a look, almost a warning. She closes her mouth and sits back in her chair, waiting for him to answer you instead.
"He didn't do anything," your father explains, "Your mother invited him for dinner and he declined, that's all."
"It's the way he declined," your mother sits forward again, voice curt and irritated, "He was very rude."
"Rude?" You can tell your mom wants to talk about it, dredge up something she hasn't been able to discuss for a while; you're surprised she hadn't already told you over the phone while you were at college.
"This isn't appropriate conversation for the dinner table," your father says sternly, and you're not sure if he's talking more-so to you or your mother, "End of discussion." As usual your mother folds in on herself, picking up her fork and starting to eat again.
"Your father's right," she says, though you know she doesn't really believe that, "Let's just eat."
You wonder what the man - Mr. Miller - could have said to make your mother react this way. It's not unusual for her to get stiff and bothered by people - it's pretty easy to push her buttons, actually, but the list of things that offend her is long and detailed. He could have said pretty much anything to set her off. The specifics are lost on you.
You resign yourself to defeat and eat your dinner, sincerely glad that the tingling sensations in your body have subsided. You do not need to be feeling like that with your parents in the room.
-
You dream about him.
It's muddled and confusing, taking place simultaneously back at college and in your childhood bedroom, but he's there. In both places, somehow. You're back at that first week of college party, but instead of the blonde boy it's him standing across the room, eyeing you up and down. But this time he doesn't go for your roommate, he walks over to you and looks deeply into your eyes, gives you that delicious smirk and brings his hands down to touch your waist. He's so big compared to you, so much older. He pulls you in with a strong grasp and holds you to his broad chest, runs his hands down your back.
Then you're both transported from the college party to your parent's house. You're on your bed, sitting next to him atop the covers and watching him play guitar. You watch his fingers, long and thick, hypnotizing you with their movements. He stops playing and brings one to your chin, tilts your head up to look into your eyes again.
"You're not a good Christian girl," he whispers in that southern drawl, breath ghosting across your face, inching closer and closer, "You're all mine, aren't you?"
You wake up with a start and immediately feel the dampness in your underwear, the butterflies back again with a vengeance as your pussy throbs and pulses. You've never felt anything like this before, grasping your chest and reaching for your bedside lamp in the darkness. You sit there in bed for a few moments, catching your breath and waiting for the feelings to vanish again, for your aching core to stop reminding you that it's never been touched, not once, even though you know it's absolutely begging for it.
With shaky hands you reach down and run a finger through your wet folds, shivering at the soft touch. You've never masturbated before, never had sex or anything else you've learned about from your friends at college. They'd looked at you with disbelief when you'd told them you'd never even had an orgasm; one of them had gone so far as to ask if she could give you one.
"No," you'd said curtly, "No thank you."
Now you sit on your childhood bed with your legs open and a finger pressed lightly against you within your underwear. You're not even sure what to do, where exactly to touch, how to bring yourself to completion. You're twenty one years old but you've spent your entire life being the good, pure, God fearing girl waiting for marriage like her parents taught her.
"Enough," you whisper into the darkness, "I'm done waiting."
You yank your finger out of your panties and lay back on the bed, switching off the lamp and closing your eyes again. You've already decided before you drift off that you'll be paying Mr. Miller another visit tomorrow, as soon as possible.
He told you he wanted to teach you how to use your fingers; you intend to make sure he does.
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girlgenius1111 · 27 days
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i'll angel in the snow until i'm worthy
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putellas!reader [p2 to make it through the winter if it kills me] tw: contains descriptions of self harm. a long look back at what happened a year ago, when alexia found out. a brief glimpse into the present.
“Alexia,” you called. Your tone didn’t reflect the urgency of the situation, and Alexia didn’t think to be alarmed when she answered you. 
“In the kitchen.” She replied, assuming you would come to her. 
“Alexia,” you yelled again. This time, some fear leaked into your tone, and you knew your sister had heard it. Her footsteps were loud, stomping down the hall, and to the door of your room. She pushed it open without a second thought, eyes widening in panic. 
“Fuck.” To her credit, Alexia moved fast. She was grabbing a towel from the linen closet and sprinting back to your side before you had time to try to say anything, pressing it down on your leg hard. 
“Okay, okay. We’re okay. Everything is fine.” You weren’t sure if your sister was reassuring herself, or you. 
You didn’t know what had happened. One second you were tracing the familiar lines on your leg with your finger, the next, you had a blade in your hand, and you’d pushed just a bit too deep. It was bleeding. A lot. You didn’t know if you needed stitches, if something was wrong, but you knew that you weren’t in the right mind to deal with it. In your moment of panic, you called for Alexia. You trusted her to fix it. To fix you. 
Alexia’s eyes were stuck on you, stuck on your leg. Your shorts were pulled up, and if Alexia had ever thought that this was an accident, she no longer did so. The scars marking your skin told a different story, and as your sister stared down at your leg, her horror was evident on her face. 
Alexia was speechless, and your sister was never speechless. If she were to be honest, she didn’t know what to  do. Here you were, in front of her, clearly not doing well. And she hadn’t noticed. You’d been doing this for long enough for there to be numerous scars on your body, and she hadn’t noticed. 
You, too, had no idea what to say. Calling for her had been an instinct, but now that the panic had left your body a bit, you regretted it with every fiber of your being. She was going to freak out, you were sure of it. 
She kept her composure longer than you expected, long enough for the bleeding to stop. She pulled the towel away from your leg and inspected the damage that you’d done. It wasn’t as bad as it had seemed originally, and you sighed in relief. At least you wouldn’t be dragged to the hospital. Before you’d really even had time to really be grateful for that, Alexia was fixing you with a piercing stare, a slew of words leaving her mouth that reflected very clearly her feelings on the situation. 
“What the fuck is this, nena? What were you thinking? I- I don’t understand, what would possess you to do something so incredibly stupid. This could have gone deeper, this could have needed stitches. What then, hmm? This is not okay, pequeña, and it stops, now.” 
Alexia wasn’t even quite sure what she was saying, her heart racing in her ears as she panicked. She was terrified. You always put on such a happy exterior, and it was beyond frightening that she’d had no idea, not even a clue, that this had been going on. You lived with her, you spent everyday together, and she’d been completely oblivious to the fact that you were hurting so badly, you’d turned to this. She felt like she’d failed you, failed your mom, failed everyone. She was supposed to take care of you, and protect you.
None of these sentiments were expressed, though. Instead, she practically shouted at you, not sure what to say or do, other than make sure, make completely sure, that you’d never do this again. A pained look flashed across your face, before it was replaced with one of defiance. You stood up, shoving your sister away from you. 
“It’s fine, Alexia. This is none of your business, please, just leave.” 
Alexia scoffed, rising to her feet too. “Leave? Leave. I’m not letting you out of my sight ever again. I’ll take your door off the hinges if that's what it takes but this cannot happen again, do you understand?”
Your sister didn’t understand. Never in her life had she felt the need to do something like this, and her mind was not focused on trying to understand where your head was at, it was only on making sure you were safe. She didn’t know that you needed this, more than you needed anything. It was the only thing you had, the only thing you could rely on to make yourself feel better. She couldn’t take this away, you wouldn’t survive it. 
“Fine, I won’t do it again. Get out.” You lied, shoving her towards the door. Your sister shook her head, seeing clearly through your lie, pushing you right back. 
Despite her shove, she forced herself to take a few deep breaths, to calm the situation down. “No. We need to talk about this, we need to fix it. Give me your phone, I need to call mom.” Alexia reached her hand out, freezing at the look on your face. At the mention of your mother, all the color drained from your face, and you stepped backwards, shaking your head frantically. 
“Alexia, don’t you dare, mom does not need to know about this, you can’t tell her, you can’t tell anyone.” 
“I have to tell people to get you help, nena, mom needs to know, the club needs to know,”  Alexia rationalized, stepping closer, her hands raised in a soothing manner. 
“NO. Alexia, you cannot tell anyone this, you can’t. I don’t need help. There is no issue, I am fine. I won’t do it again, I promise, Alexia, I promise. Please, just please don’t tell anyone. Please.” You begged, tears beginning to well in your eyes. 
Your sister’s frustration only grew. How could you say you were fine? How could you say you didn’t need help? It was absurd, completely absurd to her, that you could think this was okay. 
“Pequeña, either there is an issue, and you need help, or there is no issue, and you just wanted my attention. You have it, sí? So which is it?” She spoke slowly and carefully, only realizing she’d said the wrong thing only when you flushed red with anger, hands connecting with her chest again, harder this time. She stumbled backwards, not expecting it, and you moved right past her, fleeing through your bedroom door. 
Attention. Attention? How could she say that, how could she possibly think that? You didn’t want her to know. This was your thing, it was none of her business. It had nothing to do with your self centered, overbearing sister, and it made you livid that she’d think to say that. You ran down the stairs, shorts rubbing painfully at the open wounds on your leg. You weren’t quite sure where you were going, but you couldn’t be here anymore, not with Alexia. Not if she was going to insist on talking about this, insist on acting like you’d done something horrible. 
“Come back, now, pequeña, don’t you dare leave this house.” Alexia shouted after you, rushing down the stairs just a second too late, the front door slamming shut just before she reached it. She was panicking now, panicking for real, as she threw the door open and stepped outside, just in time to see you start her Cupra, backing it out of the driveway. Your sister stood frozen, watching as you drove away, so worried she thought she might be sick. 
She didn’t know where you were going, or what you were going to do. You’d taken the only car at home, and she had no way to go after you. Alexia stepped back in the house, looking for her phone. She needed Olga to come home, now. Olga would know what to say, she’d know where you were going. She was perfect like that, knew you almost as well as Alexia did. When your sister lost her head at you, Olga was the first one to calm things down. Alexia needed Olga, now, more than she’d ever needed anyone in her life. 
-----
You didn’t go far. Only a few blocks to Mapi and Ingrid’s apartment, parking the car, and taking the elevator up to their floor, pitifully knocking on the door, hoping to god they were home
Mapi knew. She’d known for a few weeks, after she’d caught a glimpse of your leg when you hadn’t changed quick enough in the locker room. Unlike your sister, she hadn’t freaked out. She’d picked you up later that day, making an excuse that she needed your advice on a gift for Ingrid, driving you guys to the beach, before she brought it up. Mapi was kind, compassionate about it. She told you what you needed to hear, realizing that you were not quite at the point of stopping. Mapi knew she had to discuss this delicately, that pushing you too hard too soon would only do the opposite of what she wanted. All she asked of you was that you talk to her more. She’d promised you that she’d help you figure everything out, that you’d do everything at your pace. She’d promised she wouldn’t tell Alexia, if you promised to be honest with her. You’d kept her promise, and she’d kept hers. You were probably only a few minutes from calling her and asking for her to come get you when you’d panicked, and decided to call for your sister. Mapi always knew what to say after- not making you feel guilty, or stupid, but not sugar coating everything either. She’d told you, about a thousand times, that if you needed her, to call or come over. No matter what. 
You were still pretty closed off from her, and Mapi wasn’t expecting you to take her up on that offer. She moved quickly, though, when she pulled open the door and caught sight of you, arms wrapped around yourself, shaking enough for it to be visible. 
“Hey, nena,” she murmured, guiding you into the house and right into a tight hug. “What happened?” She asked, making eye contact with Ingrid over the top of your head. Ingrid knew too, mostly because Mapi didn’t keep things from her girlfriend. You trusted Ingrid, too, as much as you trusted Mapi, even if you didn’t rely on her in the same way. 
“Ale knows,” you cried. “I cut too deep and I called for her and she freaked out, Maps, she was so mad,” 
This wasn’t good. Mapi knew Alexia well, and knew how quick she was to respond with anger when she was scared. There was no doubt in the defender’s mind that this is what happened. If past fights were any indication, you’d likely fled before Alexia could really understand what was going on. You were Mapi’s priority, though. She took a calming breath, before pulling away and putting her hands on your shoulders. “I’ll take care of it, alright? Just try to relax. Go with Ingrid, she’ll patch you up. I’ll call your sister.” 
“Mapi,” you began, not feeling at all interested in facing your sister anytime soon. 
Mapi could be strict when she wanted to be, though, and she shook her head firmly. “No, she needs to know you’re okay. Go with Ingrid.” 
Reluctantly, you turned to where Ingrid was waiting for you, first aid kit somehow already in hand. She led you out to their little terrace, settling you both in chairs before she asked you to roll up your shorts. To her credit, she didn’t flinch, only blinking a few times before she got to work cleaning and bandaging. 
“You know Mapi wants another cat?” She said after a minute, glancing up at you. You choked out a laugh, wiping at your eyes. 
“Bagheera is not made to be a sibling, she’s much too spoiled for that.” 
“That’s what I’ve been telling her, but you know how she gets.” Ingrid agreed, very easily distracting you. You fell into conversation with her, most of it at Mapi’s expense. As if Ingrid wasn’t cleaning your cut, as if she wasn’t bandaging the wound you’d inflicted on yourself. 
-----
Inside, Mapi was trying to prepare herself to call Alexia. Your sister would not be happy that Mapi had known about this and kept it to herself, but the defender had been doing what was best for you. Her plan was to get you to tell your sister eventually, once you’d warmed up to the idea a bit more. It was too late for that, now, so she clicked Alexia’s contact. The speed with which your sister answered clued Mapi into how truly panicked Alexia must have been. Alexia was famously awful at answering her phone, but she must have had it right in hand, waiting to hear from you, before Mapi had called. 
“María,” Alexia began, seconds away from begging Mapi to help her look for you. 
“She’s here, Ale. She’s here, she’s with me and Ingrid, and she’s completely fine.” 
“She- she’s there? With you?” There was a pause, muffled voices hitting Mapi’s ear as Alexia assumedly relayed the information to Olga. “Mapi she’s hurt,” 
“I know. Ingrid’s taking care of it. Why don’t you come over?” 
“You know? She told you? Why are you being so calm about this María?” Ever observant, and ever suspicious, Alexia was alarmed at how little surprise and anxiety was notable in her best friend’s voice. 
“She told me. Just come over, Ale, we can talk about it. Bring Olga, she makes you act like less of a crazy person.” 
-----
Alexia must have done some thinking on the short drive to Mapi’s because she came in guns blazing. Mapi was being too calm about this. The seemingly random increase in time she’d been spending with you was now making more sense. Mapi had known. Mapi had known that Alexia’s baby sister was hurting herself, and the defender hadn’t told her. 
“You knew.” Alexia accused, pushing past Mapi to enter the apartment, Olga trailing behind her. Mapi nodded her head. “You knew and you didn’t tell me.” 
“She wasn’t ready for you to know. She didn’t think you’d react well, and clearly she was right.” There was no malice behind Mapi’s words, but Alexia responded like there had been. 
“How I react is none of your business, María. Where is she? I'm taking her home.”  
“She’s on the terrace with Ingrid.” Alexia stopped her pacing, turning towards the sliding door, spotting the back of your head through the clear glass. Mapi stopped her. 
“Not yet, we need to talk first.” She said carefully, not backing down when Alexia turned back to her, the captain’s face fixed with an intense, fury filled expression. 
“María, I appreciate you taking care of her, but I am taking my sister home. Now. I’ll deal with you later.” 
Mapi shook her head, looking to Olga for help, knowing that although she could probably stop Alexia from going out there to get you, she’d rather not have to do so. Olga stepped closer, placing a careful hand on her girlfriend’s shoulder. Alexia’s body deflated at the contact, and she turned towards the brunette, suddenly looking much less angry, and much more upset. 
“Let’s hear Mapi out, okay? I know you’re mad, but she’s your best friend, and you trust her. If she didn’t tell you, she had a reason. If she wants to talk before we take pequeña home, she has a reason. Ingrid’s got your sister, let’s just take a moment to relax.” 
As if hypnotized, Alexia nodded gently, flopping exhaustedly onto the couch. Mapi took a careful seat in the chair across from her, while Olga sat next to Alexia, keeping a calming hand on her leg. Privately, the defender wondered how differently this would be going if Olga wasn’t here. All her teammates gave her so much shit, constantly, for being completely whipped for Ingrid. Though this wasn’t a story Mapi would ever tell, she wished, briefly, that she could present the evidence that her tough captain was down just as bad for her own girlfriend. 
Mapi took a breath, thinking carefully about how she wanted to start this. She wasn’t sure how to make your sister understand, but she’d try her best.
-----
Ingrid could keep small talk up for a long time, it turned out. Through the raised voices, and even when they quieted down, Ingrid kept you talking. Eventually, after you glanced back inside nervously for the 5th time that minute, the Norwegian gave up on distracting you. 
“She’s not mad at you. I don’t know what she said, and I know it probably feels like she’s angry, but she’s not. She’s scared, and she’s worried about you. She just loves you a lot, and she’s not sure what to do.” 
Hesitantly, you leaned over, resting your head on Ingrid’s shoulder. “She’s going to make me stop.” 
“You were always going to have to stop. This isn’t healthy. Alexia is going to be more intense than María was, but she was always going to do everything she could to make you stop, to help you get better.” 
“She asked me if I was doing it for attention.” 
Ingrid sighed. Sometimes, she wished her normally level-headed captain was more level-headed when it came to the people she loved. That intensity was what made Alexia, Alexia. A fierce love that knew no bounds, though it had its drawbacks. 
“You’re not.” Ingrid dismissed. “Even if you were, elskling, that doesn’t make you a bad person. You need help. If you were trying to tell your sister that in this way, it just means you need help. You’re sick, honey. You need help, you deserve help, and if I know you’re sister at all, she’s going to get you help if it’s the last thing she does.” 
That, at least, you agreed with. 
-----
When Mapi was finished giving Alexia a long lecture, a role reversal if either of them had ever experienced one, she walked to the door, knocking softly. Ingrid led you back inside, taking in the very grim expressions on everyone’s faces. Alexia looked destroyed, honestly, and Ingrid knew it was a combination of factors; guilt that she had missed this, and guilt that she’d been so harsh earlier. 
Your sister didn’t move when you walked in, but Olga did, pressing a kiss to your forehead, before pulling you in close. You clung to her, and your sister watched out of the corner of her eye, the way you collapsed into her girlfriend without a second thought. She’d never felt worse in her life, never felt like she’d failed so greatly. The feeling only grew when Olga released you, and you finally looked at your sister with so much apprehension that Alexia wanted to cry. 
You didn’t move any closer to your sister, and you didn’t look at her again, instead focusing your attention on Mapi. 
“Nena, do you want to stay here tonight? You can go home and talk to Ale tomorrow.” Mapi offered. 
Your eyes flickered to your sister, shocked when she didn’t object. Instead, she nodded stiffly, speaking more to the ground than to you. “If you want to stay, you can. I’d rather you come home, but if you would feel better here, then I want you to stay.” Alexia paused, looking hesitantly between Olga and you. “We don’t need to talk tonight, I won’t call Mom, I won’t tell anyone. I… we will do what makes you comfortable.” 
You looked between the older girls, finding everyone’s attention fixed on you. They were giving you control, it seemed, truly allowing you to decide what you wanted to do. It calmed you, no longer feeling completely powerless. And even though you were hurt, and angry with Alexia, even though you kind of wanted to shove her again, you could tell she was trying. Trying to make up for what she’d done and how she’d acted. You knew Alexia, and you knew she was probably terrified right now, and having you stay here would probably keep her up all night. You loved her too much to stress her out like that. And if Alexia stayed as calm as she was now, you’d feel much better at home. 
-----
Alexia had promised you, and Olga, and Mapi, that she wouldn’t make you talk tonight. It was proving difficult, however, more difficult than she anticipated, as the three of you sat in the living room, none of you paying attention to the football match playing on the TV. You’d wanted to go to your room, but the look of pure panic on your sister’s face when you headed for the stairs was enough to have you turning around, albeit grumpily, to join the two older girls in the living room. 
You didn’t particularly feel like talking. Your frustration with your sister was fading rapidly though. Her eyes flicked over to you every minute, it seemed, and she’d attached herself to Olga the minute the brunette had joined her on the couch. Alexia wasn’t one for PDA, not in front of family or anyone. What she was doing couldn’t even really be considered PDA, but it was more than Alexia usually allowed. She’d captured Olga in a half hug, wrapping her arm tight around her and pulling the brunette into her chest. Olga had allowed it willingly, tangling her hand with Alexia’s, knowing she needed the comfort right now. If she was seeking it out so openly, neither you nor Olga could really even guess what was going on inside her head. 
As time passed, Alexia remained firmly wrapped around her girlfriend, looking over at you every few seconds, as if to assure herself that you were still there, still safely next to her. You felt more and more that you had to say something. Anything, to assure Alexia that you were alright, at least for now. You weren’t going anywhere. She didn’t need to worry so much. Of course, that was something she’d been hearing her whole life, and it wasn’t something you’re sure she’d ever listened to. 
The problem was that you weren’t sure what to say. You didn’t want to say the wrong thing, but you couldn’t stand the anxiety radiating off your sister any longer, so you reached out your hand, laying it on the couch by her. Alexia grabbed it instantly, squeezing tight, and you heard her let out a relieved sigh. At least now, she wasn’t staring at you anymore. 
It was another 20 minutes before you spoke up. “Ale, I’m really sorry.” For 20 minutes of thinking, it was admittedly rather pathetic, but it was something. 
Your sister and Olga looked at you instantly, Olga immediately shaking her head at you, nudging Ale when she didn’t respond right away. 
“You don’t need to be sorry. I shouldn’t have made you feel like that before. I didn’t understand, I don’t really understand, but I will do whatever you need from me. Just talk to me, please, that’s all I need from you.” 
There was a choice in front of you, one you were conflicted about. You wanted to talk, but you didn’t know what to say. You wanted to stop, but you didn’t know how. You wanted to feel better, but you weren’t sure that was possible. You could keep doing what you’d been doing. You were still alive, that proved that it worked, at least a bit. Or you could put your faith in your sister, who was absolutely desperate to help you. Alexia was good at fixing things. You hoped that applied to people too.
-----
Alexia thought about that day a lot, and the days that followed. It always struck her that even in some of your toughest moments, you worried about her too. That’s what came with being sisters, she supposed. She wasn’t your parent, and she knew that. Most of the time. You worried about her just as much as she worried about you, though. Even when you were angry, when you had every right to be angry, you still reached out to hold your sister’s hand, to make sure that she wasn’t too stressed. 
As she stood, with you still wrapped up tightly in her embrace, Alexia remembered how hard it had been for you last time. How hard it had been for all of you. It would be hard, again. Your sister knew you wouldn’t think you could do it again. She knew that you could. 
Alexia had always believed in you, almost to a fault. She’d gotten you through this before, and she’d do it again. No matter what it took. 
-----
not promising a part 3, but IF there was going to be one, let me know what you'd like to see.
476 notes · View notes
rainyreading · 2 months
Note
If you want to (no pressure), could you do one for Theo?
The reader (girl) and Theo are friends in their sixth year and have to babysit, maybe the reader's niece or nephew.
Maybe Theo isn't good with kids and the reader helps him. You can decide all that, I'll leave that up to you.
Thank youuuuuu <3 <3
Babysitting
Theo Nott x bestfriend!sytherin!reader
wc: 1.5k
a/n: requests open
(not my gif)
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It was winter break and you were staying at Hogwarts. A lot of your friends were staying at Hogwarts for break as well. You got a letter from your sister asking if your niece could come stay with you. You wrote back and replied with a yes.
Your niece was 4 years old. She was a little ball of fire, who always kept you on your toes. You truly loved your niece and cherished any time you spent together. So you were excited that she was coming to stay with you for a little bit.
Sixth year was equally exciting. It was like you were one of the oldest kids on the grounds, witch felt good. You had amazing friends and your classes were doable. It was hard to imagine next year was gonna be your last year at Hogwarts.
You and your friends decided to have a picnic by the black lake. Everyone in your friend group was there, which you were happy about. Some elves in the kitchen helped you out with the food, so you were very grateful.
"This is nice," you began.
"Yeah it is," Draco responded.
"Makes me want to jump in the black lake," Theo said through a mouthful of bread.
"You totally would," you teased.
"Listen, I have my niece coming to visit soon and I was wondering if you guys could help out, please," you begged.
"Yeah of course," Pansy agreed.
"I'm not good with kids," Theo put out.
"I'm sure your better than you think," you reassured.
"I'm really not," Theo argued.
"Well I still need you to be there for me," you deadpanned.
"Yes mam," Theo saluted.
Eventually your group finished up being around the black lake. Everyone packed up the picnic and carried on with their day. You stayed in the Slytherin common room reading a book by the fire.
Theo came strolling in, spying you curled up on the couch. It was in Theo's nature to bother you. He was always with you and always paling around with you. You were his best friend and he'd like to think he was yours.
"Hey Y/N/N, whatcha reading?" he asked.
You flipped up the book angling it to show him the cover then said, "Pride and Prejudice."
"What's it about?" Theo asked.
"The relationship of a boy and a girl as they try to overcome the titular sins of pride and prejudice in order to fall in love and marry."
"Sounds interesting," Theo stated.
"You're not gonna let me read are you?" you sighed.
"Well when you put it like that it sounds bad, but I just want to hang out with you," Theo smiled.
"Aw you're sweet," you cooed as you ruffled his hair. Theo swatted your hands away.
"What do you suggest we do?" you questioned as you shut your book, after bookmarking it.
"Well I haven't gotten that far yet, Um I don't know we could talk, take a walk, play a prank on Filch, maybe gossip?" Theo suggested.
"Ha ha ha," you laughed.
"You want to gossip?" You were surprised.
"I mean if you want to yeah," Theo shrugged.
"Well I just happen to know Draco asked out Astoria but she turned him down. And he was all like "I'm not taking no for an answer," but she said no. He told me he's not gonna give up though," you explained.
"I bet they will end up together, they would be good together," Theo replied.
"I herd Pansy got a F on her potion essay." Theo shared.
"Oh my god no way really?" You put a hand over your mouth.
"Yep. She was pissed," Theo responded.
"I bet."
"Blaise told me he likes Luna like a lot," Theo began.
"Wait what that's crazy. I never would of guessed," you stated shocked.
"Yeah I know right!"
"What are you two crazy kids up to?" Pansy saunters in and takes a seat next to you on the couch.
"Nothing much, just talking," you say.
"Oh well I hope it's about me," she flips her hair.
"Of course Pans," you laugh.
The three of you all chatted for a while, talking about the break. How excited you were to have time off from classes. The three of you were enjoying the break and being able to be carefree.
——————
The next day you woke up early. Your niece was coming today. You were a little bit nervous and anxious to see how she would get along with your friends. She was adorable though so you knew your friends would love her.
You went to the gate to pick up your niece and she was already there waiting for you. You were excited because you haven't seen her in a long while. You quickly embraced her after you said hellos.
"I've missed you Evie," you greeted.
"Missed you too," Evie responded.
"Come on let's walk to the castle and you can tell me what you have been up too."
Evie told you about her days and how happy she was to be visiting you. She told you about her mom, your sister and she told you about her friends in preschool.
When you got back to the castle you wanted to introduce your friends to your niece. You wanted everything to go smoothly so you secretly prayed it would.
You assumed everyone was in the common room. You made your way to the Slytherin common room with your niece. When you arrived all your friends were sprawled out on the couches and by the fire.
They all looked at your direction when you entered.
"Hi guys. I want you to meet Evie. Evie this is everyone. Everyone this is Evie." You gestured to the group and to Evie.
"Hi Evie it's nice to meet you, I'm Pansy and that's Draco," Pansy spoke up.
Evie waved to both of them.
"Hi Im Blaise," Blaise greeted.
"Hi," Evie whispered.
"And this is Teddy," you introduced.
"Teddy? Hi Teddy!" Evie is exclaimed.
"Hi little one," Theo addressed.
Evie came over to Theo and looked at him curiously. Theo smiled at her. She then reached out her hand and then stopped.
"Can I touch your hair?" she asked.
"Um sure," Theo replied.
Evie touched Theo's hair and then she giggled.
"It's so fluffy!" She laughed.
Theo gave you a look that said "what do I do?" You laughed at his lack of being around children.
"Give her a high five"' you suggested.
Theo raised his hand and said, "High five!"
Evie grinned and slapped her hand on Theo's. Evie took a liking to Theo and you could tell fairly quickly. Evie was one of your favorite family members and you were glad she liked your friends.
"Do you want to take a walk with me?" Theo asked.
"Yeah!" Evie answered.
Pansy, Blaise and Draco decided to stay in the common room. You, Theo, and Evie decided to roam the castle grounds. Evie was a bundle of energy.
"Could I have a piggy back ride Teddy?" Evie asked.
Theo looked to you for approval which you granted.
"Yeah of course," he allowed.
Evie jumped on his back and threw her arms around his neck. Theo grabbed ahold of her legs and shifted her up a little bit.
"Giddy Up horsey!" Evie called out.
Theo laughed and started to run. Evie yelled "weeeeee!" You started to catch up with them happy that Evie was having so much fun. Theo stopped at the top of a grassy hill.
"Can we roll down the hill?" Evie questioned.
"I don't see why not," you shrugged.
"Teddy go first," Evie pushed Theo on the back, urging him to roll down the hill first.
"Ok ok ok I'm going," Theo rushed out.
Theo laid down and then turned around to begin rolling down the hill. You started laughing as he speeded down the hill.
"Your turn Auntie!" Evie insisted.
"Alright settle down I'm going I'm going," you responded.
You got down on the ground and rolled down the hill. You ended down by Theo's feet and he helped you up.
"Come on Evie, tumble on down," you called.
"You guys ready?" Evie asked.
"Yes!" You and Theo both answered.
Evie came tumbling down giggling and getting covered in grass. You applauded her when she reached the end of the hill. She was beaming. Theo also joined in and clapped for her. Evie took a bow.
Eventually you all went back to the castle chatting about anything and everything. Evie held your hand and Theo's hand as she walked in the middle of you guys.
When you guys returned back to the common room Evie was tired and wanted to take a nap. You were so excited that Theo and Evie were getting along you didn't notice that Evie fell asleep on Theo's lap.
"Are you ok?" You mouthed to Theo.
"Yeah she's fine right here," he whispered.
It made your heart melt at the sight. You were thankful for Theo's help today and hoped that Evie had fun today, you certainly did. You hoped the three of you could hang out more and more. You watched as Evie slept completely content resting on Theo.
705 notes · View notes
sissyisawitch · 3 months
Text
I'll Be Home For Christmas
Relationship: Sebastian Sallow x f!MC
Summary: After leaving everything behind and starting a new life almost three years ago, MC returns to Hogsmeade for Christmas Eve. Little does she know that her brief return will be enough for her past to catch up with her…
Word Count: ~9.4k
Warnings: Mentions of alcohol in the beginning? Otherwise it's just pure pining and fluff
Author's Note: Special one shot because I just love Christmas. It should've been even longer, but I had to shorten it, or I'd never have managed to post it in time for Christmas. Anyway, I had a blast writing it, and I hope you'll enjoy it as much as I did!
I wish you all a wonderful Christmas!🎅🎄 Lots of love💕
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“Oh, MC, I can’t get over how much we’ve missed of each other’s life. You can’t imagine how much I’ve missed you!”
MC and Poppy sat in a cozy corner of the Three Broomsticks, whose dim lighting and soft hum of conversation provided a comfortable backdrop for their reunion. Excitement and laughter had been echoing for the past hours, as the two best friends shared their numerous respective adventures, and reminisced about the wonderful times they shared while at Hogwarts.
“Life sadly took us on separate journeys after graduation, there was no other way… But I'm so grateful that we haven't lost touch.” MC said as she took a sip of her third Butterbeer of the afternoon. She had never realised how much she had missed the sugary drink, especially after being away from Hogsmeade for so long. It tasted of the good old days when she spent the entire day shopping with her schoolmates, before going for a collation to relax and forget about the homework they had to do.
After Hogwarts, Poppy became a renowned Magizoologist, following in her grandmother's footsteps, like she had always dreamt of doing. As for MC, she had taken a very different path. Barely a few weeks after graduating, the girl had decided to leave everything behind and embark on a life full of travel and adventure. She never stayed in one location for very long. Her aim was to discover as many places as she could.
Now, the only thing left of her former life was her best friend Poppy, and the letters they regularly exchanged. It was for her that MC had exceptionally returned to Hogsmeade, to see her on this Christmas Eve.
“Merlin… I didn’t realise it was so late already.” MC sighed as she looked out the window. The evening sun painted the sky in hues of orange and pink, casting a warm glow through the pub windows.
Poppy grimaced in response, as if a bittersweet realisation came to her, “Time flies when you’re having fun. I wish I could stay longer... but Gran hasn't been well lately, and I've already left her on her own all afternoon...”
“Don't worry, Poppy. I totally understand.”
“I'd love to offer you a place to stay, especially since it’s Christmas Eve… but as I said, it's complicated at the moment.”
MC offered the girl another genuine and reassuring smile, “It’s okay, I don't mind. I've managed to find a room in an inn for a couple of days.”
“I'm glad to hear that.” Poppy smiled back, although ruefully.
After paying for their drinks, the two girls made their way out. They stood on the porch on the Three Broomstick in contemplative silence, the air thick with unspoken emotions. The time had come to bid farewell once again.
Poppy took a deep breath, as if to get rid of the lump in her throat, before breaking the silence, "MC, it's been wonderful catching up with you. I wish we could freeze time and stay like this forever."
A wistful smile played on MC's lips. "Life moves on, though. We have our own journeys to continue."
Poppy hesitated before uttering her newt words, “…Don't let it be another three years before our next reunion."
“It won’t. I promise.” MC replied weakly, having to bite the inside of her cheek to hold back her tears. She had never been very good at goodbyes.
Maybe that was why she had never said one to Sebastian.
With a lingering hug, they exchanged a few more words, promises to stay in touch, and expressions of hope for the future. It was nightfall when Poppy finally disapparated, leaving MC alone on the village streets, which were neither crowded nor deserted. Most of the people still outside were on their way home, or off to enjoy a late drink with their friends.
MC walked for a while, before stopping at a vantage point overlooking the quaint village which was bathed in the soft glow of Christmas lights that shimmered like a galaxy full of stars. Tremendous decorated Christmas trees could be found on every street corner, perfectly matching the garlands of fir branches that linked the roofs of the various cottages. It was even possible to find some snowmen that were bewitched to fill the air with the enchanting melodies of Christmas carols. The whole scene resembled a holiday postcard brought to life, especially with the thick blanket of snow covering the village.
It was magical. Literally.
As MC gazed at the picturesque view, memories started flooding her mind. The charming village setting reminded her of the spirited Christmases she used to share with Sebastian, spending the best part of their day at Zonko's trying to find a way to prank Ominis, before heading off to Honeydukes to buy Chocolate Frogs, just in case the blond ended up sulking for too long. The inseparable duo then made it back to the Great Hall just in time for the big Christmas feast, where they joined Ominis. The smell of roasted turkey, and the sound of familiar laughter echoed in MC’s thoughts.
After dinner, the group of friends used to return to their common room and sit down by the fire. She could almost hear the crackling of the fireplace, and feel the camaraderie that accompanied their joyful exchange of gifts. After that, Ominis fell asleep very quickly, and MC and Sebastian usually took the opportunity to get a little closer. If she closed her eyes, she could feel the sensation of his shoulder used as a pillow against her cheek, while his woody cologne invaded her nostrils.
MC could never escape these kinds of memories, especially when she was in Hogsmeade.
Everything always led back to Sebastian in Hogsmeade.
That was why she had refused to set foot there for so long.
To forget the insurmountable heartbreak of never having her feelings returned by the love of her life, MC had decided to start a new life. She had wanted to move on, to forget her feelings for Sebastian, but she had known that this would prove to be impossible with him in her life. She had therefore decided to make a clean break – because she knew that bidding Sebastian farewell was not a skill she possessed – and to disappear brutally. To make her plan even more effective, she had also cut ties with Ominis, seeing as he was Sebastian’s best friend, and MC had felt awkward to put him in the middle of her drama. The only thing MC had kept from her old life was Poppy... now her one and only friend.
MC had then spent years travelling around the world, searching for a place where she would feel comfortable enough, and that she would love enough to want to settle there for the rest of her life. The goal to her quest was to find a place that felt like home.
After almost three years, she still had not found her home.
“Ow!” MC suddenly exclaimed. Someone forcefully colliding against her back disrupted her reverie.
“I’m so sorry, ma’am. I didn’t see you.”
MC turned at the sound of a deep masculine voice. Indeed, the man could not possibly have seen her, for he was carrying a large pile of children's toys in his arms, up to his eye level, thus blocking his field of vision.
The man shifted the pile of toys into one of his arms instead of both, moving them away from his face to take a look at the unlucky person he had just unintentionally bumped into.
Next thing MC knew, before she could even realise it, MC found herself face to face with none other than Sebastian.
His chocolate eyes widened in recognition as they locked onto hers. An amalgam of shock and bewilderment flashing across his face, washing away his previous apologetic look. He was so flabbergasted that he forgot about the packages in his hands, which began to wobble. MC rushed closer to him, to put the parcels back upright, and prevent them from shattering on the floor.
“…MC?” He asked hesitantly, never tearing his gaze away from her, just to make sure he was not dreaming, that his former best friend was well and truly standing in front of him.
“Hi.” She smiled softly at him. She could not believe that she had not recognised what had once been the only voice capable of soothing her even on her worst days. To be fair, it had changed remarkably. It was more intense, manly... even sexy.
“You’re back?” He questioned eagerly, a beaming grin breaking through the initial stupor.
MC nodded in response. She could not bring herself to tell him that it was only temporary, or even worse to admit to him that she had not come back for him, that she had never had a single intention of ever seeing him again. She could not be the one to wipe that gorgeous smile from his tantalising lips. It would break her own heart all over again.
As she kept staring into those familiar eyes, a rush of emotions overwhelmed MC. The old crush she had once harboured seemed to reignite with an unexpected intensity. It was unbelievably insane that just one glance at him was all it took to make her flamboyant feelings for him resurface. She thought she had managed to eradicate them, but she had actually only been able to bury them deep inside.
However, with that also came the horrid realisation that Sebastian was carrying a large number of toys in his arms. As MC looked once again at the eye-catching bundles in his arms, reality struck her like a cold breeze.
There, nestled in his grasp, was the object of the rude shock that life had evolved without her, in ways she never could have foreseen. Obviously, these toys were for his children, meaning that Sebastian was also married and had a loving wife waiting at home for him.
MC, still quite in denial, racked her brains to find another rational explication, but there was none. There was no other option because Ominis always said he never wanted kids in order not to pass on his ‘cursed Gaunt genes’. As for Anne… well last time MC had heard of Anne was the day Solomon Sallow died. After that, she had severed all contact with everyone except Ominis, who had promised her not to divulge any information about her whereabouts.
MC’s heart sank as her mind kept repeating itself that Sebastian had moved on, embracing a world that now included the joy and responsibility of raising a family.
“Merlin, MC! I thought I’d never see you again! You’ve missed so many things, there’s so much I need to tell you! Do you live here now?” If Sebastian had ever held a grudge against MC for disappearing without warning, no trace of it was visible. His excitement was taking over completely.
“I have a room at the Hog’s Head.”
“What? The Hog’s Head?” He exclaimed in horror – rather dramatically if you asked MC – “You can't possibly stay in this dodgy shithouse!”
MC was surprised by his crude words. She was used to his outspokenness, but she had not expected to hear it again so soon after such a long time. She could only shrug sheepishly, “I don't really have much choice... Sirona didn't have any more rooms available for me. Everything was booked up… you know… with the holidays.”
“Ah... Well, I can't exactly let a lovely lady like you sleep there. I've got room at home, you can come if you like.” Sebastian puffed out his chest, putting on his false air of chivalry.
MC tried her best to conceal the blush creeping up her cheeks, but alas, she could do nothing about her nervous stammering, “Oh… Oh, I… I don’t wanna bother you. Besides, the Hog’s Head’s not that bad…”
“Don't say no. Please. Really, I insist. We could spend the evening drinking and catching up… What d’you say?” Sebastian gave her the sad puppy eyes, and MC could feel all her resolve slipping away at the same second.
Thinking about it twice, the Hog's Head was truly, absolutely dreadful. The few times MC had been there, she had been catcalled far too many times for her liking.
So yes, she knew that staying with Sebastian, his wife and their children was going to be pure torture, but MC still preferred that to the risk of being mugged or assaulted by one of the Hog's Head patrons.
“Okay.” She ended up saying, forcing a smile that masked her internal turmoil.
“Brilliant!” Sebastian looked so excited that it would not have surprised MC if he had started jumping up and down. “Have you got any luggage you need to pick up in your room before going to my place?”
“No, I've just got this." MC replied, pointing to her small rectangular shoulder bag, barely large enough to hold a box of Bertie Bott’s Every Flavour Beans. “I travel light.”
“Perfect! Well then, if you will follow me, my lady.” He offered her his arm with a wink, and after a brief moment of surprise, she accepted it.
Sebastian made it so effortless to fall back into their old dynamic, that it made it just as natural and easy for MC to do the same. It was like they had never been apart.
They walked together, sticking close to each other, in the same way they used to do when they were still teenagers. As they strolled through the streets of Hogsmeade, MC assumed Sebastian was taking her to a Floo Flame. The girl was therefore genuinely caught off-guard when he stopped in front of her. a small house typical of the village – made of stone with an excessively pointed roof – and took out a key to open the front door.
“Ladies first.” Sebastian's face lit up with pride and joy, while he let MC in first, still the perfect gentleman as usual. Even married, he could not help being flirty.
Before entering, MC took a deep breath to try and calm her nerves, in anticipation of meeting the woman who had succeeded where she had failed, the woman who was better enough than her in Sebastian's eyes to have succeeded in stealing his golden heart.
However, instead of coming face to face with her nemesis, MC found herself immersed in an intimate reflection of Sebastian's essence, overwhelmed by how homey it felt. The house was truly cosy, but a little small for a family in MC's opinion. But then again, it had to be remembered that Sebastian was used to small spaces, having lived in his little one-room cottage in Feldcroft for most of his life.
The living room had the charm of disarray, with stacks of well-read books scattered on the coffee table next to empty mugs, suggesting that Sebastian had not lost his messy habits. The smell of the fireplace and coffee intermingled, creating a comforting atmosphere that reflected precisely the way Sebastian always managed to put MC at ease.
MC guessed that the upstairs, which was in fact a mezzanine, must be the bedroom. She did not dare go upstairs to respect his privacy, but from the ground floor, she could see the top of bookshelves reaching up to the pointed roof, proof that Sebastian was still as thirsty for knowledge as ever.
All these little details showed MC that, although his life had evolved, the man standing a few steps away from her was still her beloved Sebastian.
Sebastian, observing MC's reactions, could not suppress a grin, "It's not much, but it's home. You can have the bedroom, and I'll sleep on the couch.”
On further inspection of the house, MC came upon the kitchen, which was open to the living room. She could not help noticing that the worktops bore the marks of failed culinary experiments. Some pans with burnt bottoms were abandoned on the counter, and dirty cutlery had accumulated in the sink. In short, the kitchen was a mess, just as Sebastian could be in other people's lives.
However, what stood out most to MC was the absence of signs of shared living. There were no visible traces of another person – no stray belongings, no indications of a partner or children. It was as if the whole house resonated with Sebastian alone, as if his whole person had become woven into the fabric of his environment.
As MC continued to stare in silence at his topsy-turvy house, Sebastian scratched the back of his neck nervously, “Don't pay attention to the shambles, please. I didn't clean up... since I wasn't exactly expecting any guests.”
Instead of reassuring him as she would have liked, MC's curiosity was quicker to take over her next words, “Where’s your wife?”
“My wife?” Sebastian frowned.
“Yes. The woman you married.” She added bitterly. Her curiosity slowly lowered its mask to reveal its true self of authentic jealousy.
He looked away, but MC could still see that he was biting the inside of his cheek to keep a straight face, “I’m flattered you think I’m charming enough to get a wife, but I’m afraid there’s still no Mrs. Sallow. Besides Anne, of course.”
“Oh.”
“Oh?” Sebastian chuckled at her enigmatic reaction.
“I thought the toys were for your kids…” She admitted shyly, pretty embarrassed after making so many wrong assumptions about him.
“My kids? Bloody hell, MC, you sure have high expectations for me!” Sebastian exclaimed, clearly amused by the situation. “But no, I don't have kids. The toys are for my niece.”
MC was gob smacked, eyes wide and mouth agape, “Your… niece? You have a niece? Anne had a child? Wait, did she get married? With who?”
“That’s a lot of questions.” He smirked playfully at her, while looking for a bottle in one of his cabinets. “But I think you can guess the answer to the last one.”
MC looked down at her feet, taking a moment to think, when realisation hit her like a bolt of lightning. She turned her head back to Sebastian so fast it almost gave her whiplash, “Ominis?”
“Bingo.” Sebastian replied casually, uncorking a bottle of Firewhiskey. “And he took Anne's name. He's Mr. Sallow now.”
“No way!” She gasped, letting herself fall limply onto the sofa out of utter stupefaction.
“Yes way.” He laughed wholeheartedly, sitting down next to her and pouring two glasses of alcohol for each of them.
"How? When?"
"Apparently, after fifth year, they did more than just keep in touch."
MC took her glass in hand, but did not drink from it. She had far too many questions on her mind to take the time to have a sip, "But how did they deal with Anne's curse?"
"It disappeared once you killed Rookwood, since he was the one who cursed her. Apparently, magic disappears with the caster. I learnt all this a few months after graduation, when Anne got back in touch to invite me to their wedding…”
Sebastian suddenly paused in his explanations to down his glass of Firewhiskey in one gulp.
“She wanted to invite you too… I had to explain to her that you'd disappeared without warning." He continued, looking pained, and MC suspected it was not just because of the bitterness of the alcohol.
"I'm sorry." MC winced at her own words. She was pathetic to listen to, using the most clichéd and basic phrase. But it was all she could muster to respond, because it was exactly how she felt. She was profoundly sorry. Sorry to the people she cherished the most, for abandoning them without looking back. But also sorry for herself, because she now had to accept the bitter realisation that she had been absent for so many crucial milestones of their lives.
Sebastian only shook his head, avoiding her gaze and preferring to stare at his empty glass, "Why did you do that? Why didn't you say anything? I was worried sick ‘cause I thought something bad had happened to you, that some Ashwinders were still out there, and had kidnapped you. I spent months looking for you... I'd even asked the Aurors to search for you.”
MC sipped her drink slowly, using the alcohol as a distraction from the painfully heartbreaking explanations of the man sitting next to her
“…They eventually found you overseas. In perfect health... and in perfect company so I've heard. That's when I realised that you hadn't been taken away, but had gone away of your own free will.” Sebastian poured himself another glass before throwing it back again.
“I'm so sorry.”
He scoffed bitterly, “I don't want to hear that you're sorry. It's no use. I just want to know what you were thinking when you left.”
This time, it was MC's turn to down her glass before pouring her heart out in the most honest way possible, "I just needed to get away from everything, from the past. I just wanted to start again."
Against all odds, he nodded understandingly, "Wish I could stay mad at you for it... but I won’t say that I don’t understand."
What he did next surprised MC in the most pleasant way. Sebastian reached out towards her, placing his large hand on top of hers, which was resting on the brown leather of the sofa. Even if his hand was calloused and weathered by time and experience, MC was amazed by how perfectly it fit around her own.
"What matters is that you're here now." He offered her a tender smile that warmed her heart in the most appeasing way. Only he could do that to her.
"I am." MC smiled in return, even more brightly. It was contagious. She turned her hand over and intertwined their fingers together.
As their conversation died down, MC could not help but steal a moment to observe the transformation in Sebastian’s appearance. The once-adorable teenage boy she remembered had blossomed into a handsome man. His features, chiselled by the passage of time, sculpted a strong jawline that added a touch of rugged refinement to his countenance. The shadow of a beard adorned his face, giving him a distinguished and slightly mysterious air. Sebastian's tousled hair fell with a casual elegance, framing a face that bore the subtle imprints of life's experiences, such as a scar on his eyebrow arch that MC had never seen before.
The only remaining trace of the boyish charm that MC had cherished years ago, was the constellations of freckles that beautifully decorated his face. They had always made MC weak in the knees, but the butterflies in her stomach were multiplied tenfold now that they were highlighted by his light tan.
MC internally begged herself to stop ogling him before she fell further under his spell (if that was even possible, considering how head over heels she was for him).
She poured herself another drink and cleared her throat, “You said you wanted to catch up over drinks, right? Go ahead. Tell me about yourself.”
As Sebastian spoke, MC found herself captivated by the way he carried himself – his confidence unaltered after all these years, and the assurance with which he gestured. There was an understated magnetism in the way he spoke, a reflection of the man he had become since they last parted. As he easily recounted all he had achieved, MC marvelled at the beauty of the journey that had transformed him into the person sitting in front of her.
And so, MC listened attentively, desperate to know everything she had missed about him. She thus learnt that, after Hogwarts, Sebastian had joined the Auror recruitment programme. His first reason was that it was a profession he was passionate about, and that allowed him to do what he loved all day long. The second reason – and perhaps the most important – was because he knew that this career would help him to achieve noble things. In other words, it was his way of making amends for all the mistakes he had made in the past, in the hope that Anne would eventually forgive him too (which had taken a long time, but eventually worked out).
After having been accepted into the programme, Sebastian knew that he would not be able to stay in Feldcroft, firstly because the cottage held too many painful memories, but also because it was now Anne and Ominis' shared home. Consequently, he had found himself a small studio in London, not far from the Ministry. However, even after spending several months there, it just never felt like home to him. He resented the lack of green space, and the fact that he always had to check that none of his Muggle neighbours noticed that he was a wizard. So he moved again.
Looking for a place that was both in the heart of the Highlands and still bustling with life, Sebastian found only one possibility: Hogsmeade. The small, all-wizarding village met all his expectations, and the Ministry was easy to reach thanks to the Floo Network. And so, Sebastian moved into this small cottage, perfect for his life as a bachelor.
“So Auror Sallow, huh?” MC said playfully. “Well, can Auror Sallow win a duel against Ancient Magic Prodigy MC?”
“He sure hopes he can, since it’s supposed to be his job.” Sebastian laughed along with her.
“Do you want to put yourself to the test?” She cocked an eyebrow at him mischievously.
“You know I never shy away from a duel.” He replied with the same spark of deviltry in his eyes.
Without wasting any more time, Sebastian stood up, then turned to MC, holding out his hand to help her up. It was a simple gesture, but it was enough to make MC's cheekbones turn pink, as would any act of affection she received from Sebastian.
The two took their positions, taking a few steps apart before facing each other. It had been years since they last engaged in the exhilarating dance of magical duelling, a pastime that had once defined their youth, especially after being named Crossed Wands champions for three years running.
"Ready?" Sebastian grinned, the confidence of experience illuminating his eyes.
"Always." MC replied, wand at the ready, and they prepared to rediscover the thrill that had bound them together in shared laughter and friendly rivalry.
Ever the perfect gentleman, Sebastian let MC commence hostilities.
“Expelliarmus!”
“You're off to an easy start.” Sebastian laughed after brushing the attack off with a simple Shield Charm. “Confringo!”
MC deflected the spell just as easily, smirking right back at him, “You're off to a predictable start.”
A symphony of lights ensued, as sparks and spells flew, and the air shimmered with the energy of their magical prowess. MC’s spells were fluid and controlled, a testament to the skill she had honed over the years. Sebastian, however, moved with a newfound grace and precision, his every movement reflecting the growth and mastery he had attained thanks to the Auror training.
The duelling only grew in intensity as the two friends weaved intricate spells, each trying to outmanoeuvre the other. Laughter and teasing remarks echoed through the night as memories of their youth resurfaced in the midst of their magical exchange.
After several long and intense minutes of competing against each other, Sebastian unexpectedly directed his wand away from MC, aiming instead at the ceiling, and more precisely at the chandelier hanging from it.
“Glacius!” The candles obviously failed to resist the ice and were instantly extinguished on contact, plunging the room into semi-darkness.
Distracted by the newfound refined strategy established by Sebastian – which he had no doubt learnt to put in place at the speed of light during one of his courses – MC did not notice Sebastian disappear under a Disillusionment Charm, which was all the more effective as there was hardly any light in the living room, apart from the orange flames crackling in the fireplace.
With a final, masterful flick of his wand, Sebastian cast the final blow, “Depulso.”
MC found herself propelled to the floor, her back slamming against the sofa. Judging by the underwhelming low force of the impact, it was easy to guess that he had restrained himself, so as not to hurt her.
“Looks like I've had my long-awaited revenge for fifth year. I've finally bested you in a duel." Sebastian, breathing slightly heavier but grinning ear to ear, extended a hand to help her up.
MC, refusing to admit defeat, grabbed Sebastian's hand but only to make him fall to the ground beside her. She rolled them over until she was astride him, holding him firmly down.
She grinned down at him, “Really? Because I actually think I’ve won.”
He barked a laugh, “And I think you've forgotten the rule that you're not allowed to use physical violence in a wizard duel.”
“Since when do we play by the rules?”
Their gazes met for the umpteenth time that night, but this time was different. It was as if time had come to a standstill, as if the world had momentarily stopped spinning for them, just to let them savour the closeness of the moment.
MC kept staring into Sebastian's chocolate eyes, and was truly taken aback by what she saw in them. His eyes, once full of youthful curiosity, now sparkled with a different kind of radiance. They shone with a brightness that seemed to reflect the happiness and contentment he had found in his life. The laughter lines around his eyes only enhanced their glow, and as MC looked into those bright, expressive eyes, she could not help but feel a sense of joy for the man who had evolved from the adorable teenage friend she once knew, into the confident and content individual currently lying on the ground beneath her.
In those eyes, she saw the echoes of the genuine happiness that had transformed Sebastian into the person he was meant to be, the person she should have met from the very beginning of fifth year, if only Anne had never been cursed by Rookwood.
But now Sebastian was completely fulfilled with every aspect of his life. It was as plain as the nose on his face. And the feeling was made all the clearer by the fact that his lively eyes were perfectly matched by his wide toothy grin, which shone brightly even in the middle of the darkened living room.
After eventually snapping out of her thoughts, MC pulled herself away from Sebastian and helped him straighten up, “I’m proud of you, Seb, of what you’ve become. The future Mrs. Sallow will be very lucky to have a capable man like you by her side.”
Sebastian sat down next to her on the floor, facing the fireplace, and back resting against the sofa behind them, “She’ll never be as lucky as Mr. MC will be. I hope he’ll realise he’s got the most brilliant witch of the world by his side.”
MC grabbed his arm and hugged it close to her chest, while hooking her leg over one of his. Their limbs were tangled together, clinging to each other. Sebastian seemed to have no objection to this new positioning. In fact, he seemed quite delighted as he wrapped an arm around the shoulders of the girl next to him.
“What d’you think he’ll be like, my future husband?” She asked quietly.
“He’ll have to be right for you.” He replied all too solemnly.
A small laugh escaped her, “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“It means it has to be someone who will know how to take care of you, and give you everything you need to be happy, without a single shred of hesitation. It will be someone who's worthy of standing by your side and will be able to protect you from any danger… so basically someone who'll be able to defeat me in a duel."
"Seems like I'll be stuck with you for the rest of my life, then." MC continued to smile, but it was no longer in amusement. It was something more akin to contentment.
Sebastian mirrored her expression, "Perhaps you will. I can’t imagine it'd be too bad, would it?"
"Apart from your occasional bad temper, I think I could take it." She rested her head on his strong shoulder.
MC was not sure whether it was the fatigue accumulated from her perpetual travels, or the feeling of being in a warm, comfortable home, or even the fact of being reunited with Sebastian (it was probably all three), but her eyelids became heavy without her even realising it, leading her into a peaceful sleep.
“I'm going to celebrate Christmas at Anne and Ominis' house tomorrow. You're coming.” Sebastian declared out of the blue, without realising that the girl had started dozing off.
“What? No, Seb, I can’t do that. I can’t just barge in when I wasn’t invited.” MC mumbled groggily.
“You don’t need an invitation, MC. It’s you. You’re always welcome.” He retorted instantly, as if it was the most common fact to ever exist. “Plus, they miss you, so they’ll be the happiest people in the world if you show up.”
“I won't even have a present to give them...” She muttered like a pouting small child, which made it impossible for Sebastian to hold back a chuckle.
“You're back. Believe me, that's better than any present you could buy.”
Sebastian's fingers subconsciously started tracing invisible shapes on her arm, effectively lulling her back to sleep.
❄∗❆∗❅⁂∗☃∗⁂❅∗❆∗❄
The next morning, MC was woken by the few rays of winter sunshine that the curtains had failed to hold back. Keeping her eyes closed to enjoy a few more minutes of rest, she rolled onto her stomach and was pleasantly surprised by the feel of soft sheets against the skin of her face. But what struck her most was that she could smell Sebastian's perfume all around her, as if she were immersed in one of the bottles.
Completely enveloped by the sophisticated fusion of woody undertones and hints of vetiver, and the enigmatic charm it carried, MC opened her eyes and realised that she had indeed spent the night in Sebastian's bed. On seeing this, MC let herself think that Sebastian had slept in the same bed as her, and that perhaps, with a little bit of luck, he reciprocated her feelings.
A flutter of anticipation flickered within her, one that prevented her from staying in bed any longer. Without wasting any more time, MC descended the mezzanine stairs to the living room, where Sebastian was already sitting on the couch, Daily Prophet in hand.
“Good morning, sleeping beauty.” Sebastian greeted her with a smile when he noticed her standing at the bottom of the stairs.
MC realised he must have been up for quite some time, for he was freshly cleaned up – the lack of stubble which had been present the previous day was testament to it – and already dressed up for the imminent Christmas reunion. He was clad in a tan windowpane shirt, coupled with a gingerbread brown vest matching his tailored pants. The choice of colours could not have been more perfect. All those shades of brown brought out all his most majestic features: his unruly yet soft hair, his freckled skin, his warm and reassuring eyes…
Sebastian was making it humanly impossible to tear one’s gaze away from his god-like appearance, and MC could not resist making a comment about it.
“Morning, handsome.” She smirked playfully back at him.
“Did you sleep well?”
“Better than ever.” MC admitted, a discreet pink tinting her cheekbones. “Just a question, though. How did I get up there?”
“I carried you, of course. Couldn't let you sleep on the floor. What kind of host would I have been?”
“And… you slept…?”
“On the couch. Just like I told you I would.” Sebastian smiled tenderly.
“Right.”
And with these few simple words, reality dawned on MC. Disappointment settled in, like a gentle snowfall dampening the warm embers of her previous hope that Sebastian harboured feelings for her.
The truth was that he had chosen the sofa over sharing the bed with her, a sign that he still viewed MC as nothing more than a friend. The girl felt her heart tug, like a reminder of why she had chosen not to be part of his life any more.
MC took a deep breath, “I'm gonna go and get ready, so we don't arrive late at Anne and Ominis'.”
“Anne likes us all to be dressed up for Christmas. We can go and buy you a dress at Gladrags, if you'd like–”
She immediately shook her head, “No, no, it's fine. Don't worry, I've got everything I need.”
MC took out her wand and pointed it at her small shoulder bag on the floor. With a simple flick, the object grew tenfold in volume until it reached the size of a suitcase. MC opened it, revealing that the bag had been enchanted to be bottomless, and she climbed inside it before disappearing. All that could be heard was the sound of her footsteps, and her bustle as she went through all sorts of outfits.
“Talk about travelling light.” Sebastian snickered.
A few moments later, MC emerged back from the suitcase as if climbing a ladder, wearing an ankle-length cotton mahogany dress. The corset hugged her waist perfectly, and highlighted her bust with its square neckline and short puffed sleeves. The dress was nothing extravagant, but the fact that it fit her like a glove was what made it so charming.
“Is this dress all right? Think it'll be nice enough for Anne?” She gave it a twirl, so that Sebastian could see it from every angle, before putting on a black cloak to protect herself from the winter cold.
“It looks great. You look great. Well, not great, actually. I mean– More like stunning. You look stunning, you do. We’re even matching. The colour, I mean. Because obviously you look better than me.” Sebastian stammered awkwardly, his cheeks tinged with a hint of shyness. “Merlin, this is awful. I need to learn to shut up.”
“It’s alright. I understood what you meant, that's the most important thing.” MC could only chuckle at his new bashfulness. She found it absolutely endearing.
Sebastian took a deep breath before speaking more clearly, “What I’m trying to say is… You're beautiful. You’ve always been.”
“Thank you, Seb.” She met his gaze, a gentle smile playing on her lips.
He tried to divert attention from his nervousness by slipping on his long black coat, and grabbing the wrapped gifts for his niece, “Ready to go?”
MC nodded in response, waiting for Sebastian to apparate them. She expected him to grab her by the arm, but instead he wrapped an arm around her waist. He brought her small figure close to him, as if he wanted to make sure that she would be comfortable during the apparition, that there was not even the slightest chance for her to get splinched.
With a loud crack, the world began to spin. Next thing she knew, MC was standing in the middle of the snowy village of Feldcroft. As she tried to right herself, she staggered slightly, dizzy from the apparition, whose effects were far more brutal when someone was doing it for you. Fortunately, Sebastian still had an arm wrapped around her waist to cradle her against him. With his other hand, he grabbed her elbow to steady her.
Once Sebastian was certain that MC was all right, he guided her towards the Sallow cottage, which she had not seen for years. From the outside, it looked much bigger than she remembered, particularly because it had an extra floor. Sebastian explained that he had helped Anne and Ominis enlarge it after their wedding, so that they would have enough room for their future family.
Sebastian was the first to set foot on the cottage porch. He hid MC behind him with his body, to create an effect of surprise, then knocked on the door. It was Anne who answered, appearing in the doorway wearing a sublime ankle-length midnight-blue velvet dress adorned with cultured pearls.
"Sebastian! I told you to buy only one present! She's going to end up spoiled rotten if this keeps up." Anne exclaimed without even greeting her brother.
"She's my only niece. Who am I to spend my money on if not her?"
"How 'bout your sister?" She raised an accusing eyebrow at him, while clearing him of all the packages in his arms.
"Ah, but I've brought a surprise for you too. Look what I found last night…" He intoned with amusement, and stepped aside to reveal MC. "A lost soul who wanted to spend Christmas alone at the Hog’s Head!"
"Oh my, MC!" Anne swiftly pulled the girl into a bear hug. "Ominis, come here!"
"What is it, sweetie?" The blond man called from afar, carrying his daughter in his arms.
Judging by the way he had stopped dead in his tracks, coming to an abrupt halt, MC knew that he had sensed her presence thanks to his sentient wand.
Sebastian decided to take his brother-in-law’s daughter off his hands, so that the two friends could reunite peacefully, "Hey, little monster! Wanna give a hug to Uncle Seb?"
Meanwhile, MC approached her old friend and spoke softly, "Hello, Ominis."
Knowing that Ominis was not very comfortable with physical contact, especially with people he did not know well, MC was not sure how to greet him. So it came as a great surprise when he made no hesitation whatsoever and took her in his arms, holding her tightly.
"I should be telling you off for disappearing... but I'm not going to. Not today." Ominis whispered in her ear.
She chuckled lightly, "I'm happy to see you too."
"Let me take your coat." He offered after pulling away.
MC untied the ribbon from her cloak, and handed it to Ominis. She then turned to Sebastian to pick up the toddler in his arms, so that he too could remove his thick winter coat.
"Hi, little princess. I'm a friend of your mummy and daddy, and your uncle Sebastian too." MC cooed in a honeyed voice. She could not help noticing that the little girl in her arms was the perfect amalgam of her two parents. She had all her mother's features, but with meadow-blonde hair and grey-blue eyes like her father.
"Unkie! Unkie!" She pouted and made big gestures with her arms to indicate that she wanted to go back to her uncle. She truly was an uncle's little girl.
"I'm here, baby.” Sebastian immediately took her back into his arms, after giving Ominis his coat, to cradle her. “You don't have to be scared of MC. She's really nice too, you know."
"Auntie?" The one-year-old asked hesitantly, reaching out to wrap her hand around MC's index finger.
"That's right, that's Auntie MC." Sebastian encouraged her. It was impressive how he naturally had his way with kids.
It may have been silly, but something as simple as being called Auntie by a child she had just met, as well as by Sebastian, awakened something in her, a sense of belonging that had been dormant for a long time. She truly felt like a fully-fledged member of this family.
Anne suddenly let out a sigh, "I'd love to be able to celebrate the reunion with you, but I've still got lots of things to do in the kitchen. Sebastian, can you look after the baby while Ominis lays the table?"
"I'll come and help you, Anne." MC declared.
"Thank you, MC. You're too kind." Anne exited the living room, followed by MC.
“So… You and Ominis, huh?” MC started once they were alone. She was sitting across from Anne at the small kitchen table which was covered in food stains from preparing the meal.
Anne immediately shook her head, “Oh, no, no. We’ll have plenty of time to talk about my marital life later. Let's talk about how you ended up here with my brother after all these years."
"We ran into each other last night in Hogsmeade. He offered me to sleep over, and we basically spent the better part of the night talking." MC shrugged.
"And?” Anne pried impatiently. “What happened?"
"Nothing. What do you want to happen?”
“Nothing. It was just a random question.” Anne replied coyly while she finished icing the Yule log. “So, update me as well. Where are you in life? Have you met anyone?”
“No, not at all. I haven't really had time for that.”
“That's a shame.”
“What – uhm – What about him?” MC did not look up from the kilted soldiers she was preparing, in an attempt to appear nonchalant. Needless to say, it was a failure.
“Who?” Anne feigned ignorance.
MC heaved a sigh, deciding to finally meet her friend's gaze, “Sebastian. Has he met anyone recently?”
Anne bit the inside of her cheek, "I think you should ask him directly."
"I'm scared it'll be awkward…"
"Well… if you want to know everything, he hasn’t courted anyone since you went away. He claims that he's not interested in dating, that he’s focusing on becoming a proper Auror first. He always finds an excuse to avoid admitting that he's already got a girl on his mind, but is too much of a coward to act upon it."
MC felt her heart skip a beat. A cold realization settled over her, making her stop everything she was doing. Her heart sank, the weight of unspoken truths pressing upon her, and she forced a tight-lipped smile, concealing the ache within as she navigated the sudden revelation that someone else was in Sebastian's heart, and it was not her.
MC swallowed thickly, "Has he known her for long?"
"Several years."
"And is she a good person? Does she treat him well?"
"He's never been happier than when he's with her." Anne admitted with a sincere smile that contrasted drastically with the unsettled look that MC was unable to disguise.
"Who is it?" She asked weakly, not entirely sure she wanted to know the answer.
"I fear that’s too much information, and that's not for me to tell. Just ask him."
Without another word on the matter, Anne gracefully pivoted, excusing herself to go back to the living room and announce that the meal was ready. MC took a moment to compose herself, swallowing the bitter pill of disappointment before joining the others in the living room.
Seated at the table, surrounded by the warmth of holiday decorations and the aroma of a festive feast, the four friends engaged in a pleasant chatter. The clinking of cutlery and laughter created a veneer of normalcy. They reminisced adventures from their time at Hogwarts, shared stories about their jobs, exchanged anecdotes about Anne and Ominis’s little one, and indulged in the delights of the Christmas meal.
“So, MC, what have you been up to during your travels?” Ominis asked as he had just finished feeding his daughter.
MC swallowed her mouthful of turkey before replying, “Well, you know, trying to explore the world and discover new places. Honestly, I’ve just been searching for a place that makes me want to stay, that feels like home.”
“And have you found that place yet?”
MC was silent for a moment. How was she supposed to explain that she had found this special place years ago, but had fled far away from it, just to search the world for something similar? Because if MC was willing to face the truth, she knew that her home was wherever Sebastian was.
Sebastian was her home.
It was quite ironic that he did not feel the same way about her…
“I… I’m not sure.” MC finally said.
“…Does that mean you’ll be back on the road again?” Ominis questioned again, but this time with caution.
“Yes. I leave tomorrow morning.” MC replied resolutely.
The clatter of dropped cutlery echoed like an unintentional punctuation to the tremendous silence that followed. Eyes widened, gazes met with uncertainty, and an unspoken tension pulsed through the room.
Anne was the first to break the palpable unease by raising her voice, “What? But you just came back! You can’t leave so soon.”
The next sound came from Sebastian's chair legs scraping the floor as he stood up abruptly and threw his napkin on the table, “Excuse me. I need some fresh air.”
His eyes did not meet anyone's as he left the table. Without even grabbing his coat, he stormed out of the house. The door slammed behind him and echoed through the deathly hush inside.
"What’s up with him? Did I say something wrong?" MC asked, disconcerted. She was completely unaware of the weight of her revelation, which had hit her friends like a tidal wave.
Anne huffed in irritation before shouting at her, "Of course you did, MC! You're supposed to be his best friend! Can't you see how cruel you're being to him?"
Ominis rested a hand on his wife's shoulder, "Calm down, sweetie. It's not her fault MC is dense."
"Hey!" The girl exclaimed indignantly, but Ominis ignored her.
"Let me put it simply for you, MC. We were all hurt when you left without saying a word, but Sebastian's been a complete wreck ever since. The usual cheerful Sebastian you know was nowhere to be found for years… until today. And that's only because you came back.”
“And now, you've just brutally told him that you plan to disappear tomorrow, and take his happiness with you! Again!" Anne insisted, determined to keep rubbing it in until realisation eventually hit the girl.
Fortunately, it worked quite quickly, but now MC did not know what to do with herself, "I... I didn't know that... I thought he’d just forget about me and move on."
"I thought you knew him better than that. Haven’t you yet realised that you're everything to him? Because it's more than time you do!"
“I… need to talk to him. Excuse me.”
MC, in turn, rushed out of the cottage, only grabbing Sebastian's coat in her haste.
The freezing air greeted her as she stepped outside, snowflakes landing on her hair and the bare skin of her arms. Thankfully, it did not take her long to spot Sebastian, who had moved slightly away from the house to lean against a tree, his shoulders hunched slightly against the winter chill.
She approached him slowly, but with a determined step, the snow crunching under her feet. She knew he had heard her by the way he straightened up, even though he seemed intent on ignoring her.
“Seb, come back inside. It’s freezing, you’re gonna catch your death.” She implored him, covering herself with her arms to protect herself from the icy wind.
“What’s it to you? You won’t even be there to see it.” He replied even more coldly than the weather, without even turning to look at her.
“…Put on your coat at least.” She insisted, extending it to him.
Sebastian took the coat from her, but instead of putting it on like expected, he draped it over her, so that she would not get cold. His hands lingered on her shoulders, which were now protected by the thick felt.
At last, he met her gaze, his eyes silently pleading with her, “Am I not good enough for you to stay? Not good enough for you to notice me?”
MC grabbed his wrists as if by instinct, “Seb, of course you’re plenty enough. You’re my oldest friend–”
Sebastian sighed in annoyance and pulled away from her, “But can’t you see it’s not enough for me?”
“…What?”
Sebastian reached into his pocket, retrieving a small velvet box. He had always imagined giving her this gift with a broad smile, but now he was opening the box with a rueful frown, to reveal a delicate ring.
“I wanted to give it to you a little after we graduated. I wanted to give it to you to confess my feelings. I wanted that ring to be a symbol of my devotion, and a promise to always remain loyal to you… Turned out life had other plans because you left the day I bought it.”
“Sebastian…” MC croaked out, doing her best to fight back the tears that threatened to fall as she stared at the magnificent jewel that was the poignant representation of all the missed opportunities and lost time.
"Now’s a good time to give it to you, I think. If you’re going to leave again, might as well be honest while I have the chance, before you run away like last time." He said acrimoniously as he placed the ring on her finger.
"Wha…” The shock took away MC's voice before she could even finish her sentence. Her eyes were riveted on the golden band. “What about the girl you like? Anne told me you were interested in someone."
"The girl I like?” He laughed humourlessly. “MC, I've been ridiculously and irrevocably in love with you since fifth year, since the day you kicked my arse in Hecat’s class. You literally knocked me off my feet. I know I didn't always show it well, but it's true, it's always been you.”
MC let out a pained grunt and hid her face in her hands in shame, "Oh Merlin, Seb... I've been such an idiot."
“Why?” Sebastian frowned.
“I've always loved you too. But I was so miserable thinking I'd never be anything more than your friend, that I decided to disappear to try and forget you.”
“And? Please, tell me it didn’t work.” His words came out desperate, almost begging.
She took his face between her hands, and lovingly caressed his cold cheeks, “It didn’t. How could I ever forget you? Being away from you only made me miss you more.”
His hands came down to rest around her waist, bringing her close to his body, in search of both solace and warmth, “It's all right. We're together now. You don't have to leave anymore. All's well that ends well.”
“Well… Not exactly all. You gave me this beautiful ring, and I have nothing to give you in return.”
“I finally have the witch of my dreams back at my side. I couldn’t dream of a better Christmas present.”
Suddenly, MC and Sebastian were interrupted by a cracking sound coming from above them. They looked up and saw a branch of mistletoe sprang out of thin air from one of the branches of the tree they were standing under, its delicate white berries shimmering in the soft glow of the surrounding lights.
Sebastian looked back down at MC, a playful smirk tugging at the corners of his lips, “Actually… I’ve just thought of a gift you could give me.”
The snowflakes descended gracefully around them, creating a magical scene that mirrored the fluttering emotions in their hearts. In that enchanting moment, with the world cocooned in a quiet hush, MC found the fiery courage and desire to close the thin gap between them. Their lips met in a passionate kiss, and their hearts were set alight, for the moment they had dreamt of most in their lives had finally become reality.
Out of enthusiasm, Sebastian tightened his grip around MC, with his arms completely wrapped around her petite frame, enveloping her in such warmth that she completely forgot they were both covered in snow. He pressed and secured her tightly against him, and lifted her off the ground. Out of reflex, the girl's hands travelled up to wrap around his neck to steady herself. Her fingertips grazed his soft curls, sending shivers down her spine.
Unfortunately, their winter wonderland moment was abruptly interrupted by the joyful cheers of their friends inside the house. MC and Sebastian reluctantly pulled away from each other, and turned in the direction of the commotion to see Anne and Ominis glued to the window to spy on them. The wand in Anne's hand was proof enough that it was she who had conjured up the mistletoe.
MC giggled, looking back at her boyfriend with stars in her eyes, and her hands resting in his chest, “Merry Christmas, Seb.”
“Merry Christmas, darling.” He answered softly before leaning in to steal another kiss from her.
MC sincerely hoped there would be another Mrs. Sallow other than Anne next Christmas, for she had finally found her home and never planned on leaving ever again.
❄∗❆∗❅⁂∗☃∗⁂❅∗❆∗❄
Part 2 : Christmas at Home (link)
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apomaro-mellow · 6 months
Text
Wrong Number 4
Steve was eternally grateful that he'd finally told Robin about Eddie. Because now, he could torture her with his outfit choices. Robin groaned and covered her eyes as Steve held out more shirts.
"What do you think? Stripes or no stripes?"
"Steeeeeeve", Robin whined.
"You're the one that told me stripes really shows off my chest."
"Is Eddie a tits guy? Or an ass man?"
Steve put the shirts back in the closet. "I don't know. I don't know Robin and the fact that this is a video call date makes it worse."
"Actually....actually it makes it better." Robin uncovered her face and grabbed Steve's shoulders. "You'll be on the phone the whole time!"
"Yes...We've established this", Steve said, not sure where she was going with this.
"I mean, if you're doing a video call, YOU control what Eddie sees."
Steve stared at her face for a long while as she simply emoted using her eyebrows. "Robin, no."
"Robin, yes. Come on. We're going shopping. You're waaay overdue for this. And I need a couple of things myself."
"Things going that well with Chrissy?", Steve asked right before Robin threw his shoes at him.
"What do you think I'm doing while you're on your date?", Robin grinned.
-----------------------
Eddie's excitement just got more and more intense with each day. By Wednesday he was vibrating any time his hands weren't occupied with something. He only hoped it didn't translate to his texts. Cool as a cucumber, that was his motto when it came to Steve. He couldn't come on too strong.
(9:45 am) Thinking about those beefy thighs (9:46 am) god i wanna wrap them around my head
Perfect. Smooth. And not too much.
At least he didn't think so at the time. About an hour later Eddie remembered that Steve was at work and possibly reading that text in a room full of prepubescents. And he knew he was going to reap what he sowed when Steve texted him later.
[12:01 pm] You are the ultimate distraction.
(12:02 pm) sry. i forgot you were at work
[12:03 pm] I don't think you are sorry. In fact, I think you need to be punished.
Eddie needed to get a job in coding because there was no emoji that properly conveyed the intensity of the 'boi-yoi-yoi-yoing' going on in his pants. How grateful he was that he didn't need to talk. Texting would cover any stuttering he was sure to do.
(12:04 pm) punishment? 😏 (12:04 pm) what kind of punishment?
[12:05 pm] See me after class, Mr. Munson.
God, four o'clock couldn't come fast enough. Eddie knew that'd be around the time Steve got home from work. He spent about an hour rolling around in bed before getting up, needing to distract himself. He wasn't due for work today, but he went in anyway to loiter.
"I can tell you're horny and I can tell you're just idling until you get your dick wet. Get lost, some of us have actual work to do", Jeff said.
Eddie let out a dramatic gasp. "Jeffery! Jeffords! Jeffaniel! Jeffanie!"
"Are you just going to sit there, making up full names for me or are you gonna get off your ass?"
"I'll replace all the boards and sweep out the alleys for the next two hours", Eddie said, holding his hands together like he was praying to his friend.
Jeff rubbed his chin as he considered it. "Only if you take this next party I have coming in."
Eddie looked at the group arriving. There had to be at least a dozen. And he just knew they only reserved one lane. They always only reserved one lane.
"You drive a hard bargain Jimothy."
"Not even close", Jeff crossed his arms. "And it's this or whatever ants in your pants you'll do if you're unoccupied."
Curse his friends for knowing him so well. Eddie held up his end of the deal, taking care of the party. Turned out it was a birthday party (happy 14th Ashton). But two hours later, the time had passed and Eddie went back home. He still had an hour to spare (he didn't want to leave Steve waiting), so he spent the rest of the time coming up with some ideas for their date in a few days.
[4:04 pm] Are you home?
(4:05 pm) At home and awaiting orders gorgeous (4:05 pm) Have I been a bad boy Mr. Harrington?
Eddie's phone rang and he picked it up as he crashed onto his bed. He knew Steve could hear it when he laughed on the other end.
"You need to keep a tighter lid on those urges. It was a lucky break that all the kids were focused on their dishes that they didn't see the face I made."
"Truly, my bad Stevie. But I can't help what you do to me."
Steve chuckled. "Not even a little?"
"Not one bit. Okay, maybe a little bit. The truth is, I could've said a lot more, but I was holding back."
"Really now? And what would you have said if you weren't holding back?"
Eddie could hear something that sounded like movement in a bed. Steve was getting comfortable too. He thought about the picture he had saved, of Steve's lower body in those shorts. He had been laying in bed then too. Eddie let his mind wander for a bit. What he'd do if Steve were really in bed beside him...
"Baby if you were here right now, I'd have my hands all over you. You'd think I was an octopus."
"Tell me where you'd touch me first", Steve said.
"Well I'm still thinkin' of those legs of yours. You like massages, Stevie? I could rub you down all day."
Steve imagined Eddie digging his fingers into his muscles. That would really hit the spot, especially after a workout. "Mmm, and then?"
"And then I'd wrap them around my head, like I said. I saw what you were packin' in those shorts, baby. I would love to get my mouth on you."
Eddie heard Steve let out a soft moan and he definitely heard a zipper and some shifting. God, the image of Steve stroking himself... Eddie unzipped his pants too, palming at himself while the other hand kept an ever tightening hold on the phone.
"Eddieee..."
"I wanna hear everything, baby. I'm working so hard sucking you off, I deserve to know how good I'm making you feel."
"So good, uh", Steve let out a small breath at the end.
"Yeah? I haven't even told you how I'd rock your world yet", Eddie grinned.
"I just know...You're so good with your mouth."
"You like the way I lick you up and down? How I kiss that beautiful tip?" Eddie knew he had a dick just as handsome as the rest of him, never mind that he had yet to see Steve's whole face yet. His hand pumped up and down as he envisioned the weight of Steve in his mouth. He thought about getting drunk on that taste.
Eddie groaned and his eyes fluttered close, his mouth moving faster than his brain. "Do you shave Steve?"
"....No...is that a problem?"
"Ohh it's the opposite of a problem babe. I bet you got a thick bush. I'd sink all the way down, bury my nose in it while you're fucking my throat."
Steve let out the most delicious sound as he came and Eddie wasn't too far behind. It was like he was there, hairs coarse and curly rough against his skin while Steve moaned right into his ear.
"Mmm", Steve hummed. "I know you look good now. My cum dripping off your lips."
"I'd swallow it all, sweetness. I wouldn't waste a single drop." He would take all that Steve gave him and then some. He was a greedy man.
"I know you wouldn't. I don't allow anything to go to waste in my classroom. Have you learned your lesson, Mr. Munson?"
"Maaaybeee. I might need another lesson, Mr. Harrington. Say, this Friday, at eight?", Eddie teased.
"I suppose you'll need more help studying. Don't be late, mister."
-----------------------------
For once, Steve didn't linger after work. He made sure the kids cleaned up every last dish before the last period even ended. He even let them go a minute and a half before the bell. When Steve left, he went the back way to avoid most of the other teachers and that pre-weekend conversation. He got home right away and started getting ready. Robin had her own date tonight which meant he had limited time to get her help and last minute input.
When she got home from work, the apartment was a flurry of activity between them.
"Steve, I need the blow dryer!"
"Wait! I'm almost done!"
They both crashed into each other's spaces as they tried using the one bathroom mirror.
"Why can't you use your stupid vanity mirror?", Robin asked.
"That mirror is just for my hair and it's too small."
Robin gave him a side eye. "Is that my eyeliner?"
"Is that my face cream?"
For some reason, Robin insisted on getting dressed in his room, which meant at some points their outfits got switched around and they had to re-dress. The pandemonium finally quieted when Robin left for her date and Steve was at last alone for his. It was at 8:00 sharp that Eddie sent a text.
(8:00 pm) Knock knock 😙
Steve smiled as he started a video call. His heart fluttered at the thought of finally seeing Eddie's full face. So imagine his surprise when he was instead met with a hand that had a face drawn on it. And what could only be Eddie doing a deeper, character voice.
"Hello my love. Are you ready for the romancing tonight? I hope I get lucky, ehehehehe."
To which Steve couldn't help but burst out in laughter. Any nerves he might've had flew away.
"Oh, I don't know. I'm a proper young man. I don't think I could court with someone who was so...handsy."
"I wouldn't lay a finger on you without your permission, lovely. But maybe a few smooches. Muahmuahmuah!" Eddie's hand attacked his phone's camera with kisses and Steve giggled like it was actually touching him.
As his laughing fit subsided, only then did Eddie reveal his face. He took Steve's breath away. He was literally speechless and just stood there staring, which made Eddie start to squirm a little.
"You tryina turn me to stone, Medusa?", Eddie joked.
"Sorry!", Steve apologized when he realized he had been staring. "You just...you look really nice Eddie."
"You don't look too bad yourself, handsome", Eddie smiled.
That was putting it lightly. For the both of them really. Steve felt like he was talking to the perfect man. Eddie felt like Steve had walked right out of his wet dreams.
"So, what did you order?", Steve asked as he sat down at his table. He made sure his phone was angled that it only showed him from the waist up. Robin had the bright idea that since he could control what Eddie saw, he could wear whatever he wanted under the line of sight.
He was currently wearing a blue and white striped polo shirt. And beneath that, some lacy, navy blue panties. Maybe Eddie would find out, maybe he wouldn't. Steve had his phone on the table, propped up against some books.
"I ordered the Munson special. A grilled cheese with potato soup."
"Oh, that's a Munson special, hm?"
"Damn straight. Tomato soup is still a classic, but I'd die for a potato. What'd you get?"
"I have some leftover pasta that I just added some mushrooms too. Nothing too fancy."
"Unless it's one of those truffles", Eddie pointed out.
Steve rolled his eyes as he twirled his fork. "Truffles? On a teacher's salary?"
"Hey, you could be secretly rich."
"Oh if I win the lottery, there will be signs."
"Like 5th graders using authentic truffles", Eddie nodded to himself.
They kept talking throughout their dinner and then took each other to their sinks to wash the dishes together. Eddie talked more about his friends. Some of which he worked with and the band he was in. Steve wasn't super into metal, but he liked it enough to be interested in whatever Eddie did.
When they had talked about their date night and discussed their options, they decided on dinner and a movie. Once the dishes were cleaned, Steve took Eddie over to the living room and he sat down between the coffee table and propped him against another set of books as they both queued up the movie on their ends.
"You know it's been a really long time since I've seen this movie", Steve said. "I think I was literally a kid."
"There was a time when this was literally my religion", Eddie said as Quest for Camelot started to play.
Steve knew Eddie was into Dungeons & Dragons, so him being in love with a fantasy movie made total sense.
"Did you have a crush on Garrett when you were a kid?", Steve asked, later during the movie.
"'Did'? I'd still let him use that staff on me six ways to Sunday!"
Steve laughed and he was coming to realize he laughed with Eddie much more than any of his dates in a long while.
"I'm gonna go grab a drink", Steve said as he got up. He nearly asked Eddie if he wanted something. It really was like he was right there with him. Steve grabbed a soda and then came back, sitting down in his spot again when he saw Eddie's expression.
He was silent, which was rare.
His eyes were bulging out of his head and his hand was over his mouth.
Steve was about to ask what was wrong when Eddie's eyes flicked down and then Steve got it. He had stood up. In full view of his phone. And then turned to go into the kitchen.
Eddie had gotten a first rate view of his panties.
Part 6
Tag Team (CLOSED)
@anne-bennett-cosplayer @estrellami-1 @newtstabber @omletlove @ifyoudonlysurrender @rehfan @morganski-19 @corvidcantina @dragonmama76 @just-ladyme @tinyplanet95 @goodolefashionedloverboi @idoquitelikebread @kittydeadbones @manda-panda-monium @rhapsodyinalto @paintsplatteredandimperfect @keylime-green @ihavekidneys @samsoble @honorarybrit81 @swimmingbirdrunningrock @aizawa-emma @deleataecount @thesuninyaface @fromapayphone @justmeinadaze @hbyrde36 @queenie-ofthe-void @resident-gay-bitch @bestwifehaver @dangdirtydemons @ellietheasexylibrarian @perseus-notjackson @pyrohonk @holysteddie @cinnamon-mushroomabomination @mrsjellymunson @geekymagicalpotato @notaqueenakhaleesi
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nanaminsmoon · 7 months
Text
babydaddy!connie x blackfem!reader
a/n: so there was meant to be more at the end but it was getting too long, so i'll have to save it for another day...👀but here's more pain ig😁
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cw: pnv, unprotected sex, connie calls reader; 'ma', 'dime que eres mía, ma' ('tell me you're mine, ma'), 'y/d/n' = 'your daughter's name', n word usage
wc: 3270 + lazily proofread bc i'm tired but i'll do it tomorrow
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within the passing of a few months, connie had reintegrated himself into your lives, and had merged the three of you into the family he had always wanted. the evening that had caused it had ended with connie looking to his side, when you and your daughter’s laughs and mumbles had died down, only to see you both asleep. deciding he couldn't just observe your deep slumber for the rest of the night, he'd cool the warm smile on his face and turn the tv off. then, ensuring his movements were small so as to not disturb you both, he'd move to lift your daughter, before carrying her upstairs. he'd help her sleepily brush her teeth, put her in bed, then peck a goodnight kiss onto her forehead. the muscles in his neck would tense at the thought of leaving you alone, considering the afternoon you had spent together. so you’d wake up to connie carrying you bridal style to the bathroom where he’d sit you on the closed toilet, and help you sleepily brush your teeth, and do your skincare routine. light chuckles would leave his mouth at your drowsy agitation but his hands would remain busy, putting your bonnet on, clothing you in his shirt before, finally, joining you in bed.
that pattern would repeat a few times a week and, soon, seeing connie would no longer be an occasion reserved for fridays and sundays. because, lips pouted and long eyelashes laid comfortably as his eyes shut, connie would the first thing you’d see most mornings a week. soon, your pillow would be replaced by his tatted arm; from the second your eyes blearily shut, to the second the sun peeking through the gaps in your curtains forced them open. frequent visits would see space cleared in your closet and, connie would place a grateful kiss on your temple before filling said space with his clothes. he practically lived with you but, not yet old enough to fully understand her parents’ relationship dynamic, your daughter would be questioning why her dad wasn’t going home, at least once a day.
”we’re just having a sleepover, mama”, you said, hands busy doing her hair for school. luckily, she’d reply with a carefree nod and refocus her attention on her ipad. and, when you’d look over your shoulder, you’d see connie smiling to himself as he placed pancakes on her plate.
to the onlookers at the zoo, seeing your daughter sat on connie’s shoulders with one of his hands on her leg and the other intertwining its fingers with yours, you were a family. the same could be said for those who saw the three of you in matching shoes at the airport, going on a vacation paid for by connie. unbeknownst to them, those onlookers were admiring the wonderfully illustrated cover of a book with empty pages. because, to you, all you were was a question mark succeeding a multitude of questions. pushing someone to define something that seemingly rejected definition reeked of conflict, but the faint smell of heartache was growing in strength and you needed to fan it out before it permeated your home. so, laid on connie’s chest like most nights, you’d push yourself to ask him what had been on your mind for weeks.
”so when are you leaving?”, a small laugh would be added at the end of the question, to avoid sounding confrontational. and the skin pressed up against your cheek would move as a chuckle rumbled underneath it.
”why, you want me to leave?”, connie looked down to you, placing two fingers under your chin to make your lips more accessible to his own. and they’d be connected as you shook your head, in response to his question, before you pulled away to speak again.
”no. it’s just…what do i tell y/d/n when she asks me why daddy lives here now?”, you’d ask. making the questions light-hearted diluted their severity to connie. but when you’d sit up, obviously waiting for an answer, his face would drop slowly.
reality brought questions that connie had no answer to, that’s why he had just chosen to live in a fantasy. over the course of a few months, connie had used all the air in his lungs to inflate a protective bubble that’d shelter the family he’d been fighting to retrieve for years. joy was an emotion specially reserved for when he was with his girls, so his greed to stay joyful grew. in turn, connie never went home. boundaries had never been considered, much less the thought of ever crossing them. but now they were being demanded of him, he’d have to pop the bubble he had made, and face the harsh actualities he dreaded. holding off on what needed to be done did not make the task disappear, it just allowed connie to live like everything was perfect for a little longer.
”you think we could ever get back together?”, he asked, eyes monitoring you closely. his unexpected words pushed a laugh out of your mouth, while also lifting your hand to slap his chest. obviously, you thought connie was joking, but one look at his face would alert you of the opposite.
”you serious?”, your question would make connie pause, before his nod at you sent your heart crashing into your stomach. the weight of it should’ve been enough to anchor you to the bed, but the strength of your shock would overpower it to lift you onto your feet.
a slow dance in your kitchen, to end the candlelit dinner connie had prepared for you, had ended in your bodies being bare as your clothes covered the floor. hence why the first piece of clothing you’d pick up would be connie’s, yet you’d put it on anyways. and, as he put his boxers on, connie would watch your stood form as your face rested in your hands. though his subconscious had tormented him with demos of this very scenario, seeing your reaction in real time wounded connie far more than his nightmares ever had. your reaction had sewn his lips shut, so he’d be tasked with unpicking every stitch helping him swallow his feelings just so he could speak words he had heard many times before but never thought he’d say,
”y/n, what are we?”, your features would gather to form a grimace, before your feet would shift you towards the door. but connie’s hands wouldn’t let you get far, as they’d reach to grab your arm and pull you back to him.
”i’m in love with you, and you know that. that’s why i’m here every damn day, because i want this back”, he pointed between you two, ”i want our family back. i want this to just be normal for us, and for y/d/n to know that i’m not going nowhere”, even if you wanted it to, your head wouldn’t cease its shaking as you listened to connie. his confession confused your heart as much as it embraced it.
”then you shoulda thought about that before you fucked the both of us over”, your mouth worked hard to multitask; speaking your mind, and swallowing your rising tears.
the reason for your separation differed depending on who was asked; connie’s version of events stated that he wasn’t mature enough for you at the time. though you’d agree, you’d also add the fact that you had never felt like he was serious about you. conversations about your future had led to either dead ends or arguments. and, once the baby arrived, the noise of blaring music was more inviting to connie’s ears than the sound of new-born tears. if not him, then you would have to be the one to put you and your child first. many told you to wait it out, but you refused to wait for connie to learn how to prioritise. and his stubborn nature meant that connie would put up an unbothered front, and let you walk out his life.
over time, he settled down and you found that connie could be an amazing father when he wanted to be; he'd buy you a house, and ensure you never had to worry about money by providing you with an allowance. his logic behind it was that, seeing as your daughter was with you most days of the week, he wanted you to worry less about work, and more about mothering your child. changes in his behaviour led your friends and family to urge you to get back together, but you knew that his improvements as a father were not indicative of his improvements as a partner. truth be told, the fear of him fucking shit up again was what kept you away from him. even as he came back to you with his pleading heart on his sleeve, you shut him down and suggested just fucking as friends. complications with that arrangement arose when you fell for him again, but let your ego suppress those feelings. now they were bullying their way out of your heart and you no longer saw a need to stop them.
a small voice in connie’s mind berated him, and reinforced the idea that the reason you could never take him back was because he only existed in your life to pain you; from your breakup, to ruining your new relationships, to inserting himself back into your life without warning. that voice told him that you’d never love him again because he had done nothing to merit receiving affections as pure, and wholly perfect, as yours. and, seeing his actions bring tears to your eyes amplified that voice and he’d pull you closer, hoping that holding you would mean that your pain would seep through the pores in your skin and be absorbed into his body instead. small kisses would be planted on your temple as connie slowly walked backwards to sit on the bed, leaving you stood between his legs.
”i know i fucked up, it haunts me everyday. you shouldna had to wait for me to grow up, but…i’m ready now. i want this more than anything; i want to give y/d/n siblings, i want us to get married, and live together again. i just…need you to give me a chance”, connie’s eyes looked up to project the warmth of their sincerity onto your face, and all you could do was sigh. sure, he was was giving you what you had been wanting to see, and hear, from him for years, but was that enough to wipe out everything that had preceded it?
”a chance to do what?”, you spoke, quietly.
”to prove how much i want this.”, he said, squeezing your hands in pleading. if giving him a chance would cement his behaviour from the last few months, then you really had nothing to lose. it’d make him happy, it’d make your daughter happy and, as much as your ego didn’t want you to admit, it’d make you happy as well. so you’d roll your eyes before nodding at him, and giggling when you saw the small smile gracing his face. it’d rest there for all of two seconds before contorting into something that showed different intentions as he lifted your shirt up.
missing connie was something you hated doing, but making up for lost time was one of your favourite pastimes. so, you’d feign annoyance as you pushed him off, but you’d still be giggling like a schoolgirl as you moved his hands from your body. and, somehow, connie’s head would find its way into your shirt, his lips soon kissing your skin before moving to suck on your nipples. eager hands would take it upon themselves to migrate to the back of connie’s head, keeping his lips against you. and that’d encourage the impatient ones, stuck to your back, to harshly pull you into his deep kisses as he nipped at your navel ever so often. it was shameful how quickly connie made you uncomfortably wet; all it took was a series of wet kisses on your skin, mixed with his fingertips delicately trailing it, to deepen your breathing. but that’d be cut short when connie’s lips detached from you, as he moved out of his your shirt.
”lemme see how beautiful my girl looks”, he said, scrambling to lift the fabric off you. though your hands would help him, your mind would still be caught up on his wording.
”your girl?”, you raised an eyebrow, and he looked up at you in confusion,”you ain’t even asked me to be your girlfriend yet”, you hiding your now bare chest, and he’d roll his eyes.
”i ain’t just do that?”, he asked, desperately trying to uncross your arms so he could continue what he was doing.
”what—nigga, no! you gotta ask me”, you said and, as he went to open his mouth, you’d place two fingers on his lips, ”not now, properly. and i know you got money, so use it”, you grinned.
keeping your arms crossed left connie no other choice but to pick you up, and practically throw you on the bed. the sight of your tits bouncing from the recoil of you landing on the messy pillows and sheets, enlarged the growing bulge in his boxers so he’d rid himself of them almost immediately. as always, your expectant silence would be filled by the sound of his dick hitting his stomach. and the angry redness of his tip had you anticipating connie dicking you down until you felt like your internal organs were shifting in location. but, once he was inside you, he’d be moving at an agonisingly slow pace; the harsh prods you had been expecting to meet your cervix, were more akin to amorous pecks. that's because telling you how he felt had never been enough for connie; beit anger, neediness, or jealousy, connie needed you to feel what he was feeling. so, bearing a love for you that was so deep he could feel it in the pits of his stomach, connie wanted to replicate that for you with his dick. he wanted to know that when he pulled out, you’d feel an emptiness somewhat similar to how he felt when he was away from you.
and, as he fucked into you, you could feel it all; his regret for his past actions stretched you out until you were clawing at the skin on his back. the love he never got to give you multiplied with every touch of that spongy spot inside of you, and the words he could never say would be breathed onto your feverish skin. never in your life had you known connie springer to get overstimulated, but here he was; body adhered to your own with sweat, as he cloaked laboured whimpers with painfully honest admissions,
”i just need you so bad, ma. i hate being by myself”, he'd speak into the sticky skin on your shoulders, and comforting hands would be on his nape, massaging it softly. connie had once fooled himself into thinking that the only reason he only ever fucked you in missionary was because it was too boring to try with new people. but the truth was that it created an intimacy he only ever wanted to share with the woman of his dreams. and now that he had her legs wrapped around his waist, and her moistened eyelashes blinking up at him, he’d revel in this intimacy until he physically couldn’t anymore.
that point would seem near when, due to overstimulation and how good you felt, the blissful noises tumbling out of your mouth would raise in volume. quickly catching on, one of connie’s hands would be placed over your mouth to stifle the impending noise sure to fill the room when you came. quick reflexes would mean that connie's name, as well as random expletives, would be chanted repeatedly into the palm of his hand as you came around him. pleasured cries would fade into quiet babbles and, to connie, the fact that you could still will your lips to move meant that you weren't too fucked out to speak to him and, of course, he was wrong.
”dime que eres mía, ma”, connie begged of you. and, if you could form critical thought, you would’ve done so immediately. but anytime a coherent sentence would connect in your mind, the chain of words you had accumulated would be broken by connie’s dick sending you spiralling. yet you'd try anyways,
”i’m-m all yours-s, pa, i p-promise”, you said, and the satisfaction of hearing those words quickened his movements. his hands seemed to be digging deeper into the flesh around your hips because, looking at his dick disappear inside of you only to come out smothered in a mix of your arousals, was all connie could focus on. if it wasn’t rock solid already, that view would've made connie’s dick painfully hard. instead, all it did was make him twitch inside of you, causing him to curse at himself; connie knew what his body could handle, so he knew that one more nut would knock him the fuck out and he wouldn’t be fucking again until morning.
'pissed' did not even begin to describe how that made him feel, because all he wanted was to fuck his love so deep inside you, you’d be seeing love hearts everywhere for months. he needed you to feel how much he cared for you, and he felt like he needed all night to do that. but you two didn't have all night and you seemed to be the only one who cared,
”n-need you t-to nut, pa, i g-got work tom-morrow”, you said, and his eyes would finally look to your face again. ’how did i look away when she looks that fucking good?’, he thought to himself as his hand moved to your cheek. as opposed to when it was gripping your hips, it was loving when it touched the feverish skin on your face. honey was dripping out of connie’s eyes to dribble onto the place you two connected, and he’d fuck his decadent adoration into you over and over again until your eyes rolling back in pleasure sent him over the edge, and his hips stilled,
”fuck, why you so—fuck—pretty?”, his words landed on your stomach as his head bowed. the feeling of connie filling you for the nth time that night tightened your walls around him, and he’d wince at the torturous bliss that gave him, as he tried to catch his breath. he'd do so considerably quicker than you so he'd be the first to move, getting up to get a moist, warm towel to clean you up.
”all mine, yeah?”, he teased and, still working on recovering your thought processes, all you could offer would be a lazy hand shooing him away.
”imma make you mine properly tomorrow when i finally put that second baby in ya.”
© Rights owned by nanaminsmooninc. Do not repost without permission.
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barcaatthemoon · 4 days
Text
good girl || mary earps x reader ||
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you get worked up after mary praises you on the field.
"good girl." the words had slipped out whenever you were on the pitch with mary. it was nice being so close to each other on game days, but occasionally, it got distracting. mary yelling out directions at the backline was hot. the praise you had received for blocking out a shot was even hotter.
you were grateful to be subbed out when you were because all you could think about was mary saying that in a different context. the two of you hadn't explored much in the bedroom, content with your sex life already. mary wasn't necessarily boring, but she did like to stick to what she knew. just like you wouldn't consider yourself kinky, just someone who went along with whatever their partners were into.
inside the locker room, you were definitely guilty of rushing mary out of there. it was a home game, so the two of you could just go back to her place. she had driven you to the game anyway. the two of you always spent the night together before and after games. it was rare that either of you even wanted to spend any time at your own apartments all alone.
"what was gotten into you?" mary laughed as she got into the car with you. usually, you would have been more careful about who could have been watching, but you really wanted mary. instead of answering her verbally, you grabbed onto the collar of her shirt and pulled her in for a kiss.
mary moaned into the kiss as your tongue swiped past her lips. she was always so eager to taste you inside of her mouth. you dropped your head just a little, but not enough to break the kiss. mary's hand moved to the back of your head, cradling it as she deepened the kiss. you were certain that the two of you could have gone a lot further if it wasn't for one of your teammates honking their horn at you.
"fuck, mary, we need to get home," you told her. the light chuckle died in mary's throat as she realized how badly you wanted her. she swallowed as she shifted the car into drive.
you had your hands on her the entire drive. mary was definitely speeding a bit, but she used the roads that she knew were clear to get home. she pulled into the first spot that she saw close to the doors. the two of you got out of the car, and mary didn't let you get more than a couple of steps onto the sidewalk before she was scooping you up into her arms and hauling you over her shoulder. it wasn't done in a sexy way at all, but you still felt a bit of heat pool in between your legs at her showing of strength.
"what the hell has gotten into you?" mary questioned again. you were laying on the bed in front of her. your eyes were wide as you looked up at her, pupils blown wide with lust. mary took a step closer to you to reach out and brush her thumb across your bottom lip. "talk to me. are you upset?"
"not at all," you told her. mary looked a little skeptical, but she trusted you not to lie to her. "i just want you to fuck me, mary. i want you to fuck me hard and fast while you tell me how good of a girl i am for you, please."
mary was rendered speechless at how forward you were. she lost all of her cool as she looked away from you. you got up onto your knees on the bed in front of her. mary still wasn't looking at you, so you turned her head towards you. she needed to see the look of need and desperation in your eyes, and you knew it.
"please," you pleaded with her. mary swallowed back everything that had bubbled up in her as she nodded. "you have to want it too. i'll do whatever you want mary, i swear that i will."
"you don't have to do anything for me baby," mary told you. she pressed a very sweet kiss to your lips before she let her hands drop from your cheeks down to your waist. "i know how ready and willing you are for me. that's why you're my best girl."
the praise had all of the heat in your body torn as to where it needed to go. your cheeks were flushed, giving away how turned on you were. mary was quick to twist your body around so that your back was pressed against her front. you expected her to leave and grab the strap on or something, but instead she just bent you over so that you were on your hands and knees.
"i bet that you're soaked under this kit. when you tripped over yourself earlier, was it because you were thinking about me doing this to you?" mary asked. you nodded, suddenly embarrassed about how badly you wanted mary to fuck you. all she had said was two words to you on the pitch, and you were a horny, bumbling mess. you felt a sharp sting on your ass as mary's hand came down to spank you. "answer me, i want to hear you say it. come on, i thought you wanted to be my good girl."
"fuck," you groaned. mary's hand moved from your ass up to grab your ponytail to crane your neck back. "yes, i was thinking about this. please, mary, just fuck me."
"hmm, i don't like being rushed, but you are being very polite about it. alright, take your clothes off and i'll be right back." mary let go of you and pressed a kiss to where your shirt had ridden up on your back. you scrambled off of the bed to undress yourself while mary went into the closet. you knew what she kept in there, so you knew what to expect when she came out, and yet, you were still a bit floored.
"mary," you breathed out. she smirked as she noticed the look on your face. you were practically drooling as you took in the marvel of a sight that was her standing naked in front of you with the familiar dildo that she had bought specifically for you jutting out proudly between her legs.
"it's okay, i'm coming honey," mary reassured you. she climbed onto the bed, hovering over you. for a moment, you thought that she'd just fuck you like that, but mary surprised you by slinging your legs over her shoulders. she leaned down just enough that you could feel the head of the dildo pressing against you as she put her focus on your tits.
mary's mouth and hands felt heavenly on your body, but it wasn't what you wanted. a part of you wanted to urge her forward, but mary was moving at a fairly comfortable speed. it was how she always was with you, but today, you were on edge a bit more than normal. you had been festering with your horniness for mary for too long, and she had done a wonderful job playing along with you whenever the two of you got back.
"you're being so patient for me-," mary pressed a kiss to the underside of both of your breasts, "-what a good girl."
"mary," you whined. she glanced up at you with an uneven smile and a look in her eyes that told you she knew exactly what she was doing. mary was teasing you a bit, but it wasn't out of a place of malice. mary just wanted to make sure that you were ready for her, knowing that you'd whine and whimper and throw a fit if she tried to just give you her fingers. that was what you always did whenever she wasn't as rough with you as you could have liked.
"shh." mary pressed a quick kiss to your lips as she lined up the tip of the dildo with your entrance. mary eased the toy inside of you and waited until you started to move your hips to move hers. she grabbed onto your hips as she snapped her hips forward a couple of times. "you're taking me so good right now."
you moaned, both from the praise and the way that her hips were roughly thrusting into you. mary pressed a couple of kisses to your lips, a little bit of a warning as her thrusts grew more forceful. you knew that mary was worried about hurting you like this, so you started kissing the side of her neck as reassurance. you were a bit too far gone to tell her that she was fine, but your actions worked just as well as your words.
"i want you to cum for me, (y/n). come on, be a good girl for me and let me watch you cum all over my cock. i know that you can do it," mary cooed in your ear. the softness of her voice contradicted the roughness of her thrusts, making your head spin. it was almost like there were two different people in bed with you, but both of them were inexplicably mary. "come on now, that's it."
you whined as your entire body contracted around mary. your arms and legs were squeezing her in an attempt to keep her still inside of you. the feeling of her sitting still inside of you was comforting until it began to feel like too much. mary seemed to know when you wanted her to pull out and did so without any prompting. she tossed the strap aside and moved to cradle you in her arms. this was always one of mary's favorite parts of sex, and occasionally, you wondered if she liked this more than the actual act itself.
"you did so good," mary told you. you smiled and hummed as you rested your head against her shoulder. mary pressed a few kisses to the side of your head before she groaned.
"you okay?" you asked. mary nodded, rubbing out a bit of soreness in the back of her thigh. "did you pull something?"
"maybe. a hot shower should make it go away." you knew what mary was trying to do, and unfortunately, it worked perfectly. you were out of bed within seconds to draw up a bath for the two of you. you knew that mary preferred showers, but it had been at least a month since you had talked her into a romantic bath for just the two of you. "it's ready mare!"
"coming!" mary shouted back, twice as loud as you had been. you chuckled as you shook your head, climbing into the bath and moving against the back of it. mary paused when she walked in to see the bubbles, but still got in and let you wrap yourself around her from behind. "i said a shower."
"and i wanted a bath. besides, i'll massage out the knots when we get out, i promise," you told her. mary hummed, seemingly satisfied for the time being.
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badingsm · 7 months
Text
Hits Different — Part II
Warnings: some curses, pregnancy, giving birth, time jumps because meeting Nat again is our priority. Be patient.
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After the day that you'd spent resting in the hospital, you went home and decided to eat healthy foods because, even though you had insisted on coming home alone, Dominique didn't leave you to yourself. Instead, she had accompanied you all throughout and even stayed the night.
You two were currently sitting in the living room of your penthouse; it was spacious, so it looked like a cinema due to the large screen in front of you.
"So," Dominique started lowly, "You're really taking a break? Wouldn't that be suspicious if you wanted to stay lowkey?"
"I figured that out on our way over here, and I thought about doing some small projects before giving birth." You shrugged nonchalantly, grabbing a handful of chips from your shared bowl before dumping them in your mouth. "And then, as soon as my belly's showing, I'll ask my handlers to announce that I'm taking a break from acting, though I'll still be appearing on some Q&As as long as they're held online."
"What a plan, Mother!" She chuckled proudly. "You have enough money anyway. You can do whatever you want. Just remember to make me a godmother."
"Why not be the other mother?" You raised your brow teasingly, making her blush for a bit before she looked at you seriously. "Well, I could always use a hand considering that the other parent is.. you know.."
She's still mad at you for not telling her who the other parent was, but when she looked at you like a kicked puppy, feeling so lost about this so-called motherhood that would start soon, she couldn't help but sigh with a nod.
"I mean, I couldn't say no to that."
"Good."
-
5 months.
You whined loudly, thrashing dramatically on the couch in your trailer, because even though you said that you wanted to take a break, you couldn't.
Your body was itching to do something, especially now that your movie with Dominique is nearing the end, so you decided to stay even though you're already pregnant pregnant.
"What is it, hon?" Dominique questioned after she finished her business in your washroom. She had stayed by your side throughout those months of your journey, never once leaving you alone, which made you thankfully happy for her company.
"Hungry." You patted your baby bump gently, which you cover with oversized clothes every time you go out in public. In addition to that, shooting a scene wasn't a problem with your growing stomach because your character in the movie prefers baggy clothes over sexy ones, and you were really grateful for that.
The brunette chuckled, "What does the baby want this time?"
"Burger," You muttered with pursed lips.
"Easy, I'll go order-"
"But!" You interrupted her rambling quickly, stopping her from opening her phone to go over that app where she'll buy. She groaned at you playfully while you clapped with excitement, "Instead of buns, how about cookies as a replacement, huh? How does that sound?"
"Uh, disgusting?" She answered honestly, making you frown, "Seriously, hon, cookie, patty, veggies, patty, and cookie? I'll barf."
"You're not the one who'll eat it!" You complained grumpily. "Fine! I'll just starve here with your goddaughter, and then we'll just-"
"Okay, okay," She raised her hands in surrender, "I'll ask my assistant to buy it for you. I'm pretty sure they don't sell that stuff in my app... or anywhere for that matter."
You glared at her, having to hear her last remark, but you just shrugged, patiently waiting for your food as you rubbed your belly comfortingly.
You have to admit, though, that you've grown to love her already, even though she wasn't born yet, and you're just hoping that you'll be enough for her.
-
The birth.
"God-fucking-damn it!" You groaned, pushing with all your might as the tears pricked into the corners of your eyes. "Doc, I can't—how about I just do the c-section thingy?"
"Baby's crowning already, Miss, you can do this." She encouraged with a tight smile, together with the nurses that you've hired privately in this secluded hospital, "Come on, give me three brave pushes."
You did as you were told, and you were screaming at the top of your lungs until you finally heard the wonderful music of your daughter's cries.
"Congratulations, Miss Y/l/n!"
Doctor Rialle placed your daughter on your bare chest to have skin-to-skin contact between you and your newborn baby, and despite crying so loudly, as soon as she was placed on your side, your daughter seemed to calm down herself, making you smile genuinely while brushing the tears from your eyes.
"I love you."
-
Months have passed since you've given birth, and all throughout those times, Dominique has stayed by your side, helping you through the discovery of this so-called mothering that you've grown accustomed to, even if it means that all your time will be spent nursing your child and nothing else.
You couldn't even watch TV these days because you were too busy with your hectic schedule, but you're not complaining.
You love your daughter more than anything else.
"Hey, Y/n, I think she's hungry!" Dom yelled from upstairs while you sat on your working table in your office, preparing for the Zoom meeting where you'll be interviewed about your movie that you shot last year.
"I still have twenty minutes. Bring her over here, please!" You replied, holding the breastfeeding towel as you heard the cries of your daughter nearing, gently grabbing her from your friend's grasp as soon as they came, quickly calming down the wailing child, "Hey, sweetheart, did you miss mommy?"
"I swear you have a magic about calming people," Dominique muttered, leaving to go towards the kitchen to get some water for herself. "Do you want some chicken wings? I'm planning to order them for our dinner."
"Sure, I've been craving those for some time now, and some lasagna too," You answered, caressing the sleepy baby in your arms gently. "And isn't your flight back to New York at 10?"
"It's still early," She shrugged, coming into your line of sight with a cup of tea for you. You thanked her quietly, causing her to nod in response, "I don't have to pack though. I'll be back over the weekend."
"Hey, go get yourself a girlfriend." You chastised her for spending most of her free time with you and your daughter, causing her to scoff in dismissal, "I'm being serious! Get a life!"
"I have a life," Dominique muttered with an eye roll, gesturing for you to give your baby back to her now that she's finally asleep. "Your interview's starting soon. We'll be upstairs, okay?"
You grinned at her genuinely before planting a kiss on your daughter's forehead and saying, "Mhm, thanks."
"Anytime."
-
One year.
"Happy birthday, baby!" You happily clapped along with Dominique and your family that you'd invited for this private celebration. You kissed her chubby cheeks and said, "Mommy loves you so much!"
"Picture!" Dom yelled over the song, making you smile widely as you posed for some. "Okay, okay, I'm hungry, and I think she is too! She's been eyeing the cupcakes for a while now."
"Yeah, yeah." You laughed, grabbing one cupcake and carefully feeding her. Chocolate is her favorite flavor, so you weren't really surprised when she tugged at your arms for another forkful of the pastry. "Baby, slow down. Mommy's not going anywhere."
Atasha Ingrid Y/l/n—your one-year-old baby girl with red hair and forest green eyes is an absolute delight. Her fiery red hair adds a unique charm to her appearance, standing out beautifully against her fair skin. Her sparkling forest-green eyes are like windows to a world of curiosity and wonder. She's eager to find out all the answers to her basic curiosity, always exploring things in her own little ways, making you thankful for having a daughter like her.
The party soon wrapped up, with your guests leaving with a satisfied smile on their faces after seeing Ash for the first time since you gave birth, considering that you chose to hide somewhere in Italy as soon as you started to show your bump.
"Niks," You called Dominique with the nickname that you usually use for her, "I was thinking.."
"Oh, is that a joke?" She kidded, making you pout with a glare. "Fine. What is it?"
"Now that Ash is one year old," You sighed, looking at her. "Maybe it's time that we come back to New York?"
She seemed to stop in her tracks, helping you clean up the mess that was left from the party while your daughter was finally sleeping peacefully in her room, probably too tired from all the noises awhile ago.
"Are you sure?" She asked carefully, "I mean, are you ready? New York—there's a lot of paparazzi in there; they might see-"
"I'll lay low with Ash," You answered truthfully. "I'll hire a sitter for when I work because I miss acting already, even though the surroundings are shitty and toxic, but I'll keep her off of the eyes of the public, promise."
"Okay then. I'll book us a flight."
You smiled at her genuinely and said, "Thank you, Nikki!"
"Always, Y/n/n."
-
3 years.
"Hey, you can't remove your hat just like mommy, okay?" You advised your daughter carefully, leaning down to place the said hat on her head before planting kisses on her cheeks, causing the latter to giggle. "Can you promise me that?"
"Promise!" She clapped, excited to finally go out and accompany you with the grocery because apparently, her babysitter, Kate, had to do some emergency work in her real job so she couldn't watch over your child, leaving you with no choice but to bring her along because your supply of foods is out of stock.
The journey over to the store was chaotic, jamming with Taylor Swift's music in the car with Ash while the traffic continued, leaving you stuck for about half an hour on the road when it should have been ten minutes on the way over to the grocery store.
Nonetheless, you enjoyed your time with your daughter, especially because she told you about her adventures with Kate and how they share the same interests in dogs whenever you're not around.
Soon, you finally arrived, grabbing a cart with Ash by your side and walking since she said she didn't want to be trapped in the cart, which you know is a lie because the truth is, she wanted to be free so she could grab anything that she wanted. Not that you could ever say no to her, of course.
You were in the aisle of biscuits and chips, grabbing some snacks for you and Ash, when something caught her eye—a dog, to be exact. So, with a curious and excited mind, she went to see and follow the dog, assuming that you were watching over her and following her along.
"Hey, Miss!" She yelled giddily over the blonde lady that was holding the dog's collar. "Dog! What's the name?"
"Fanny," The blonde smiled, letting your daughter pet the animal, "What's your name?"
"I'm Ash," She proudly stated, flashing them a wide grin. "I'm with my mom..." She stopped herself when she turned around to supposedly gesture towards you but didn't see you anywhere. "Mommy?"
"Hey, hey." The blonde had jumped into action the moment that she saw the panicked state and tears forming in the little girl's eye. "I'm Yelena. Don't worry, we're going to look for your mother." The Russian blonde was about to remove the hat from Ash's head to wipe her tears, but the little girl backed away, remembering your words from earlier. Yelena raised her hands, "I'm not going to hurt you."
"Mommy," Ash hiccuped, now crying silently as she looked around for you, and thankfully, her crisis was quickly over when the familiar cart filled with familiar foods was being pushed in her direction. "Mom!"
She rushed to your side as fast as her little feet could take her, hugging your legs while she cried. "I told you to just hold onto me, baby. Where did you go?"
"Dog," She mumbled in your shirt, and from that, you already knew.
Looking up, you saw the said dog beside the blonde, who was holding her collar, making you smile apologetically towards her. "Hey, Miss, I'm sorry for bothering you-"
"Oh, no, no, it's no bother." The blonde waved you off with a smile. "Your daughter was very adorable, and she was-"
And before the blonde could even finish her sentence, an all too familiar voice interrupted your conversation with the blonde lady (who goes by the name Yelena), making you freeze in your spot.
"Yelena, have you found Thor's request?"
Natasha.
-
Taglist (that i forgot, i'm SO sorry): @marvelogic @waltermis @beforeoursecrets
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mrsnancywheeler · 2 months
Note
Whatever you do don’t imagine Finnick and his sweet girl becoming intimate for the first time after she is sold. Don’t imagine how as soon as she feels his hands on her she cracks, don’t imagine how Finnick fears reminding her of all the clients, don’t imagine Finnicks sweet girl apologizing for not being able to give him that part of her, don’t imagine how she fights the urge to disassociate during it, don’t imagine how Finnick feels when he realizes that.
Okay…bye :)
tw nsfw and trafficking related trauma
there will be more discussions of this later on in the river but for now...
but I'm definitely not thinking about how
it's just so natural, the two of you have spent your day flirting, laughing, and you're just both in bed. you've been leaving light kisses all over each other's face, light enough to be slightly ticklish and then finnick is actually kissing you. at first it's fine, but then he's deepening it and he's already on top of you so you can feel him growing hard. how his hand that was on your hips is so close to your waist band when you're pulling away. it's too much and you're desperately wishing you weren't, but you're tearing up.
he's looking at you, confused for less then a second when he realizes what it is and off of you as fast as he can be. "I'm so sorry." And he feels so guilty for kissing you like that, for getting turned on by you.
but you're upset with yourself, he's so patient, loving, kind and you can't even be intimate with him. "No, I'm sorry, you deserve better and I really wish I could."
"You don't have to be sorry at all, sweet girl." And he's giving you tissues, making tea, making sure you have all the softest blankets, anything you need to try and help you feel somewhat better.
it takes so long for you to want to be intimate like that again and everytime you notice he might be in the mood, even though he doesn't mention it and acts like he's not, you apologize profusely for not being able to be that girlfriend which he always shuts down, soft kisses to push away your tears
nor am I thinking about
eventually one day you realize you might be finally ready, to be with him in that way again, to give the part of you that's been so hurt to someone willingly
you're sitting by each other on the couch, reading, when you softly take it from his hands and sit in his lap. he laughs lightly, "what do you need, sweet girl?" and you're kissing him and he's kissing back. it's nerve wrecking but you want him so bad, and you feel like you're finally able to try and have that. you're not sure if you can say it so you're just slowly starting to grind on top of him and eventually his hands are on your legs and he's pulling his lips away. he's getting hard and feels so guilty for it, "honey-"
"I want you, Finn." And he's staring at you long and hard trying to decipher if you mean it or just feel obligated because of how long it's been, he dreads you feeling that way. but your eyes are so pleading..
"are you sure?" you're nodding, "because we can stop at any time, I don't want to make you uncomfortable." He's nervous that he'll mess it up, he's wanted you for so long, missed the intimacy and hated himself for it.
"I'm sure." And later he's got you laid out on the bed and he'd ever so carefully taken off you clothes, kissed each part of you, praised you, muttered endless I love you's so you knew how much you meant to him. he needs you to feel loved but used. you're so grateful for it, but also you he's so slow and gentle that it's had you much to worked up with anticipation. "finnick, I'm not made of glass." you say it ever so softly.
"I know, sweet girl, I know. I just don't want to make you think of them, need you to know how much I care. You'll tell me if something's wrong right? I need to know if you need to stop and it's okay if you do."
"of course I'll tell you, Finn." and it would've been true if your body hadn't decided to go on autopilot. the moment he's finally slipped inside you, your brain takes it as a queue to leave. you don't want to, he's so sweet, and you're enjoying it, but your fighting the feeling of drifting away from your body. fighting off the daze you usually fall into and when finnick looks into your eyes he can tell. he knows what it's like, he's done it too many times to count. It's further cemented when you barely process the fact he'd stopped moving.
then his hand is softly caressing your face, his heart aching as he tries to get you fully back, "honey, we can stop it's okay." and your brain has somewhat started to settle
"no, it's okay, I'm fine, Finn. I'm sorry, just got lost."
"this is for you, sweet girl, if you don't want it, that's okay. I wanna make you feel good."
"I'm sorry." You're rubbing your face, trying to keep yourself in the moment. Then he's slowly pulling out, "Finnick..." You're so frustrated with yourself.
"just need to make sure you're okay."
He's so softly tracing calming circles onto your skin and you notice how hard he still is which makes you feel guilty. "Let me take care of you then."
Finnick looks so sad as he shakes his head, "You don't have to just get me off and then clock out for everything else, this is for you too.
"finn, I want you, I don't know why my brain is trying to escape, but I do want you." and he's making sure your being truthful again, so scared you'll lie to make him feel better, pull him into the same fantasy all those horrendous clients have
"why don't you keep your eyes on me then, sweet girl, and tell me how you feel as we go?" and you agree.
it's not necessarily the easiest bridge to cross, but it's baby steps because miss what you had and miss how much your body responded to him, so ever so slowly the two of you find a way
yeah I'm not thinking about any of that
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herrscherofinsanity · 5 months
Text
Anything for you
Summary: Nayeon would do anything for her girlfriend, even getting over some of her biggest pet peeves.
Fluff
Im Nayeon x fem!reader
Word count: 1.4k
A/N: This is me being kinda back. In honor of Twice's 8th anniversary I wanted to write something for my ultimate bias; I'll be back simping for the aespa girls soon, I have lots of ideas... I just need to find time to write them. Anyway, I hope you enjoy this, and also thank you for reading!
____________________
“Hey can you pause the movie for a second? I really need to go to the bathroom”, Momo whined as she got up from the couch making the other girls groan.
“You always do this!”
“It was just getting to the good part!”
“Can we kick her out?”
“Is one night of peace and quiet too much to ask?”
You chuckled, watching the chaos unfold; a warm feeling spreading through your chest when you felt your girlfriend’s arms wrapping around your waist in a tight hold. You turned your head towards her, planting a soft kiss on her cheek.
“You find this amusing?” Nayeon whispered, not wanting to draw unwanted attention towards the two of you.
“I do” you whispered back, a playful grin on your lips, “you girls have quite the bond, I’m jealous”.
“There’s no need to be jealous, babe” she said, kissing your cheek “you’re my favorite anyway”.
Before you could reply, another voice cut you off. “What do you mean she’s your favorite?!” Chaeyoung complained, wanting more drama to unfold.
“Jihyo, the couple is being annoying… again”, Tzuyu said.
“Oh, leave them alone” Sana said, your girlfriend sent her a grateful smile, but Sana’s sentence wasn’t over yet. “Nayeon can’t help the fact that she’s whipped”.
The members laughed, teasing the two of you relentlessly. Your girlfriend shot you a defeated look, so much for spending a relaxing time together without any interruptions.
“What are we talking about?”, Momo asked as she made her way back from the bathroom.
“Nayeon being stupidly in love with y/n” Jeongyeon replied nonchalantly; your girlfriend silently sulked behind you.
“If you don’t mind, can I ask you two something?”, Mina looked towards you, a curious expression on her face.
You sent her a gentle smile, encouraging her to ask her question.
“When did you realize you were in love with each other?”.
An innocent question, but you felt as if you were about to go into cardiac arrest with the way your heart dropped. Nayeon wasn’t that far behind you, she felt as if the living room started spinning. On the other hand, both of your reactions left the girls feeling clueless. Why were you being so awkward? Surely you two had already… wait.
“W-well, we haven’t-” Nayeon began.
“Actually, I know the answer to that question!” Jihyo exclaimed, a dangerous gleam in her eyes.
“What could you possibly be talking about?” Nayeon hissed, shooting her fellow member a suspicious look; the whole interaction caught your attention.
“I would also like to know” you cleared your throat “…please”.
Nayeon looked at you with what you could only describe as pure panic, “baby, I really don’t think-”.
“Jihyo! What are you stalling for?” Jeongyeon exclaimed.
“Yeah! Go ahead and tell us!”
“Okay!” Jihyo exclaimed, clapping her hands to get everyone’s attention. “Gather ‘round kids! This is the story of how I realized Nayeon was without a doubt, head over heels in love with y/n!”.
____________________
Two months ago.
"You can't be serious".
"I swear! They kept calling us 'wig group', Sana was about ready to lose it" your girlfriend, Nayeon said, her tone full of amusement.
You laughed at her story, not fully believing it, but still amused by how creative her fans could be.
Im Nayeon, better known as Twice’s Nayeon, but to you she simply was Nayeon; the same girl who nervously asked you to be her girlfriend 3 months ago.
You two were introduced by your mutual friend, Yeri who had spent weeks going on and on about how she knew the perfect person for you to go out with.  You were incredibly hesitant, but you eventually caved and agreed to give Yeri’s friend a chance.
Nayeon surprised you in the best of ways; after your first date, you couldn’t help but agree with Yeri, she really was the perfect person for you. The loud girl carved a permanent place in your heart for herself and nothing could come between the two of you; not the hate comments, not your companies, and definitely not the malicious rumors surrounding your relationship. Being with Nayeon was definitely worth it.
“We should get going, babe”, she said with a sad smile “you have a photoshoot and I’ve got an interview; we can’t stay any longer”.
As if to mock her, right in that second it began to pour. Nayeon looked at you in shock, and you couldn’t help but laugh at the troubled expression she wore. You knew perfectly well you would have to find a way to leave the small café you were currently hanging out at, your schedules depended on it, but still, a few extra minutes with your girlfriend couldn’t hurt.
“We’re going to have to make a run for it”, you sighed, the responsible part of your brain outweighing the not-so-smart one.
Nayeon looked at you with a frown on her face, her gaze kept moving between your frame and the raging storm outside. “You’re not wearing a jacket, y/n”.
You hummed, “it doesn’t look like this rain is stopping any time soon, we can’t afford to wait”.
“You’re going to catch a cold”.
“Maybe, but you know the deal, our relationship must not interfere with our careers” you rolled your eyes as you recited the same speech that had followed you around for the past month.
“Stay here”, she said sternly, “I’ll be right back”. You frowned, but followed her instructions. Not even five minutes later, Nayeon was back with a black umbrella in her hand.
“Where’d you get that from?” you asked her, she definitely didn’t have an umbrella when you got here.
“I just bought it” she grumbled, “I’m not going to let you get sick. Now come on, we really should get going”.
_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_
Jihyo was currently waiting for the rest of her members to finish getting ready, they had an interview lined up and who knows what else might get magically booked along the way.
In an attempt to entertain herself, the leader unlocked her phone and tapped on the Twitter app. She mindlessly scrolled through her timeline, nothing truly catching her attention; that was until she came across two familiar figures.
Several pictures of her fellow member and her girlfriend greeted her. Now, Jihyo wasn’t surprised by the pictures in general; Nayeon, despite the countless warnings, was always going out of her way to show off her relationship. What truly surprised the group’s leader was the fact that the eldest member had an arm securely wrapped around you, her other hand too busy holding an umbrella in an attempt to shield you both from the rain.
An umbrella?
Before Jihyo could think about it any further, Nayeon made her way into the dorm.
The first thing the oldest Twice member did as soon as she got home was throw the umbrella somewhere far away from her, a sour expression on her face. Jihyo let out a loud laugh, not believing the sight before her very eyes; the leader’s laugh finally catching the other girl’s attention.
“You’re such a simp, Im Nayeon”.
_____________________
Loud laughs bounced back and forth across the Twice dorm and Nayeon wished she could disappear. What would you even say to that?
 “I’m sorry, I don’t understand. Why did that make you realize she loves me?” the members gave themselves whiplash with how fast they all turned to look at you.
“You mean she never told you?” Dahyun asked.
“Told me what?” you asked nervously, Nayeon whined, wrapping you in an even tighter hug.
“Nayeon absolutely hates umbrellas, y/n” Jihyo explained. “She hates them so much, back when we were trainees, she used to wear a box on top of her head whenever it rained”.
“Even to this day!” Sana continued, “whenever our managers try to help her out with umbrellas she runs away” she giggled.
“But somehow all of that goes out the window when it comes to you” Jeongyeon smirked, “you have her wrapped around your finger, y/n”.
“Nayeon can’t have her princess getting sick” Momo teased.
The girls kept throwing jabs here and there, but you tuned them out, trying to focus your entire attention on your blushing girlfriend. You sent her a soft smile, she returned it immediately, feeling absolutely at ease once she saw that sparkle in your eyes.
“Do you really hate umbrellas that much?” you laughed.
Nayeon groaned at your question, feeling embarrassed all over again. “I do, I really really do”, she paused to steal a quick kiss from your lips, “but I love you way more”.
You beamed at your girlfriend, feeling on cloud nine when you finally heard her say those words you had been longing for.
“I love you too, Im Nayeon” you said, pressing your lips against hers in a sweet kiss.
“Jihyo! The couple is being annoying again!”.
_____________________
A/N: Everytime I think of a one shot I always have the idea that it will be roughly 500 words, and somehow I always end up going past 1k, oh well.
Thank you so much for reading! If you have any requests or anything like that feel free to let me know :)
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natdu · 1 year
Text
Out of love
Pairing: Timeskip! Kageyama Tobio x Fem reader
Genre: Angst to fluff, hurt/comfort (I swear)
Synopsis: Your boyfriend's behaviour confused you a little. And with the weeks going on and on, you start to feel dejected
Warnings: Grammar - Reader bottles up a lot of feelings for a looong time- Miscommunication - Vulnerable and talkative Tobio - Appearance of Kageyama's Sister (Miwa) - 1 swear word - Mentions of abandonment
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"When did you fall out of love?"
Thats what you ask him on your mind
Afraid to pop the question out loud and making it a reality
The doubt, the pain. You utterly hated it.
It all started the week you came home from visiting your parents for the holidays. That was 6 months ago
It was supposed to be a day of joy since you missed your boyfriend dearly. While you enjoyed the time on your home town, little of it compared now to what you had lived with your lovely Tobio.
You knew your boyfriend, you knew him deeply. Because of that, you knew you wouldn't get the most euphoric welcome, but you still hoped for one of his strange outburst of affection (that being a peck on your forehead or a series of taps on your hand that meant "I love you")
You had received nothing
Well, you did receive a "Please take your luggage, we'll be going straight home"
But after 4 years with him you would expect to sense at least care on his tone.
There was none
At first you let it pass as him being overly exhausted after practice. His team was filled with tenacious people who pushed him to be a better version of himself and you were grateful for that. But at that moment you wished that they would think of his physical well being beyond the sport.
When you both arrived home you started to prepare a nice bath for him. Sure you were as tired as him but you loved being helpful to the setter.
Some people accused you of giving too much of yourself and honestly... You didn't mind, those were acts of love and you wouldn't repent over them
That didn't stop the way your smile slowly faded when he answered to it with a low murmur
"There's no time for this and I don't need it as well" Curt and slightly tired tone accompanying his words
He went to sleep as if nothing happened, as if it wasn't the beginning of your heartbreak
Everything went downhill from there
He spent most of his time at practice or attending events. And while he invited you to those it wasn't as merry as other times.
He limited himself to present you as his girlfriend and the conversation would die there
You didn't think he was cheating, he wasn't secretive about what he did and actually you were pretty informed on what was going on his absences (all thanks to Hoshiumi and Hinata, that used his phone to record their post game shenanigans and he, weirdly enough, sent them to you)
Your interactions became less and less like a couple and more as strangers. Strangers who shared a title "Couple", "Partners"
And you tried to confront him but it was never the right time. Always an away game, a shared practice. You had your own responsibilities too and there were nights were you just faded into your shared bed and hoped for the strong hold of his arms.
You missed him
And you resented him
You didn't want to talk about this over the phone. You didn't want to leave in the middle of night
If everything you were, everything you did, turned out to be an like an empty tombstone you at least wanted it to have the best closure.
One night you were going to pop the question, practiced and everything in front of the mirror. You were ready
Until he received a phone call
"Yeah?" he was hanging on his sports bag and getting rid of his shoes with a confused face
"Oh sure, I'll pass her to you" Tobio handed you the phone
"It's Miwa, says she wants to take you to a trip"
You cocked your eyebrows and took the device from his grasp
"Yes Miwa-san ah yeah Miwa just Miwa"
"How are you pretty? I know your birthday comes soon and my dummy brother has an away game. Would you like to come with me in a short trip? Just two sisters in law doing what's best for them"
Uh you didn't even think of your birthday or that he was going to be gone. That was the weight of your emotions and how disconnected you were from everything
If this was going to be the last time you would share time with Miwa, then you were going to take the chance
"Yeah let's do it. Text me the details and I'll be ready"
"Suuureee, give Lil ol' Tobio a good smack on his head, he's been a bad boyfriend"
Click
You smiled a little bit to yourself. Even if she wasn't knowledgeable of the overall situation, she summarised what was happening.
You sighted and looked at your ocean eyed man
"What else did she want?"
"Uh well since my birthday is next week she told me she wants us to have bonding time and to do girl stuff"
He wineded his eyes a little, but it lasted a millisecond. He then looked down and hummed "Ah I see, I... Kinda forgot that date was close"
He didn't look at you for a prolonged time
Was it guilt? Repent? Shame?
You couldn't take it anymore
"I... This wasn't the reaction I would've expected from my boyfriend after finding out he didn't remember my birthday"
You felt the tears pricking your eyes
"Tobio, what's happening? And I want the truth, don't walk over this"
He shifted uncomfortable in his place and started walking over the couch to sit down heavily. You just followed him, sitting in front of him
"Do you really want to talk about it now?"
"100% sure Tobio. I'm tired of being like a stranger to you, tired of your negligence, tired of your emotional absence. I need to know what's happening in your mind... I-I can't stand this any longer" before you could control it tears were running down your face
You weren't even hiccuping, just letting all out
"When did you fall out of love Tobio?"
He furrowed his brows and took a deep breath
"I... Have not"
"Tobio dont- a person who's in love wouldn't behave the way you've been doing the past six months"
He finally looked up "Six months?"
"Wha- yeah Kageyama, it's been 6 months since you fucking got me at the airport without even showing you were happy to see me, you haven't been treating me like a woman and for sure not as your girlfriend" While your tone was firm you didn't yell, it was harsher than your usual tone but the volume did not have to go up to show how hurt and mad you were.
"It's been that long?...Why are you still here?"
"What?"
He cleared his throat and hid his face in his palms
"You should been gone a lot before that love I...." He shuddered and then added
"Why haven't you go out to find someone better?"
Your eyes still wet from your crying looked at him incredulous
"Tobio.... Tell me what you've been trying to do...."
"You were the one supposed to fall out of love"
With that crack of information you decided to get closer to him. Things turned out to be messier than you had thought
"Explain that to me... I deserve answers Kageyama"
He looked like someone has changed his configuration, as if something that he had been withholding just snapped
He held your hand with a grasp so strong you thought your circulation stopped and his own voice, formerly plain, was now a frenzy of emotions
"I've been trying... To make things easier for you so that letting go wasn't... As though? . I thought while you were away that you didn't deserve the life I'm giving you"
You felt like crying again and asked before drowning more into the buried sadness
"Why do you think that?"
"I'm not the man that can give you all that you want, I'm not, but you are stubborn as no one else and I knew that unless I presented myself as the villain I've always been you wouldn't let go"
"Tobio...."
"I knew you were too good for me since the beginning but I... I was selfish and wanted to taste your love, to know what was to feel even greater than the best player in the world"
He was now crying, sobbing. You decided to rub gentle circles in the back of his hand, grasping on what he did and thought
"And now that I've hurt you like I intended, I don't want to let go I despise it. I just wished you would go away in my sleep even if that broke my heart. There were days where your eyes missed that spark you have and my heart was screaming to go and comfort you but I just didn't"
You hushed him gently while taking a big breath. Still hurt, but now hopeful
"Listen to me Tobio. I don't really know what triggered that low opinion of you and I know I can't change that over a night. What I do know is that I am as selfish as you are cuz I love you deeply and I, Tobio, I decided to be with you and to stay"
His uneven breaths accompanied your words
"I got to admit that it's my fault that we had reached this point too. I didn't confront you sooner but I was scared you know? It was a pretty hard time, your change in demeanour was so drastic I didn't have time to process it"
"I know, I know I just...."
"We have to talk about this more but believe me, if there's and 'us', if there's a string that attach us together.... I want to keep trying Tobio. I cannot stand the thought of us going appart just because we didn't know how to talk about our feelings"
You held his cheeks and placed your forehead with his
"Let us be... I'll talk to you and please talk to me... We aren't alone"
He looked at you just like before, affection and care overpowering his senses
"I'll do it yeah"
"Even if you let go I won't. The day I leave will be when both of us agree to that. And since I don't belive that will happen... no more trick behaviour, understood?"
He released a breath he didn't know he was holding
"I understand.... Please, please forgive me"
"Show me you've understand and I'll do... I'll wait patiently"
Without holding back he finally kissed your right hand.
"I promise I'll show you"
Bonus
A month later
You were sitting down in the living room of your "sister in law" as she scolded the living hell of the former Karasuno Setter
"I can't believe you didn't tell me about it, I did believe you forgot her birthday for real when you told me you wouldn't be home for that day"
He groaned and took your hand with delicacy
"Even if I wasn't with her I wanted her to have a good day. It had to look like you were the responsible Kageyama"
"Wait so you pretended you forgot my birthday as a part of your act?"
He just averted his eyes, disappointed with his scheme
"I did"
"You know Miwa, give him another flick on his forehead"
"Hey!"
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Helloooo its me and my communication stuff again woho! And my fear of abandonment ja
Hope y'all like this and that it actually makes sense, I just wanted to do something angsty again
Love you all, have a great week
Natdu
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heartcereql · 7 months
Text
𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗶𝘀 𝘄𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗺𝗮𝗸𝗲𝘀 𝘂𝘀 𝗴𝗶𝗿𝗹𝘀
ao'nung x fem!metkayina!reader
𝐒𝐘𝐍𝐎𝐏𝐒𝐈𝐒- after an abrupt break up, your feelings for your best friend's brother arise again.
𝐂𝐖- slightly ooc ao'nung (felt like writing him soft for once; bear with me) cursing, english is not my first language.
𝐀/𝐍- i love this song ong
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tsireya and you had been joined at the hip since you were mere babies. you'd been there growing up, through life's ups and downs, knew each other like the back of your hand.
so, naturally, you knew her family as she knew yours. your parents had also grown closer over the years, used to their daughters spendind the better part of their time together. and you got to know the other's siblings. which you would certainly be grateful for.
at first, you were intimidated by tsireya's brother. he scared you, to be completely honest. but then he actually talked to you, you must have been nine or so, and fright turned to childish infatuation.
of course, once you identified your feelings, you immediatly buried them and tried your best to avoid and forget ao'nung.
as you grew, you used to stay up all night, sneaking out, looking for a taste of real life. you met new people, loved to explore, discovered secrets and messed around some more. you had eventuallt found a guy. he and you were no more than a fling, but to tsireya always seemed like a big deal. and then the omaticayas came and she got involved with that sully boy. you were beyond happy for her, but you didn't miss the way it was more and more difficult to find time for you both alone.
this all led you to standing in front of her marui, doing your best to not break down crying again about some dumb idiotic kid, hoping to be able to see your best friend.
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"uh, hey" you said, startled by ao'nung there, immediatly trying your best to hide the trace of tears on your face. "is tsireya home?"
"no, she went out for a while. with that sully boy." he replied, smirking.
you laughed softly.
"well, alright, i'll come back later" you were already turning around when he grabbed your wrist, turning you to face him again.
"you can wait for her here. if you want, of course"
"really?" you grinned lightly. he just nodded and let you in.
only when you passed by his side he noticed the tears running down your bambi, round eyes.
"hey is everything okay?" he sat down as he spoke, motioning for you to sit down as well.
"yeah, yeah, why?" you tried to smile.
he gestured around his eyes and you realized you had entered in your rather vulnerable state.
"oh, yeah yeah yeah, i'm fine" you attempted to lie but your voice broke.
ao'nung knew about that guy you were seeing; he wasn't quite fond of him. after all those years you spent with tsireya, he couldn't help but develop a sense of protection over you. you didn't exactly keep this guy a secret, but hadn't told him directly. after observing him for a while, he realized the guy was a complete asshole. he wanted you to see that too, but you were rather infatuated.
"is it about that dickhead?" he asked, putting his arm around your shoulders; your skin turning to fire where his flesh met yours.
you nodded, a single tear rolling down your cheek. he immeadiatly brought you closer in a half hug, your head resting against his shoulder.
"he didn't deserve you. at all."
"gosh, i feel so incredibly stupid. you even tried to tell me!" you laughed under your breath. "but this is what makes us girls, right? we know what's gonna happen and yet we put love first. it's like our curse. making the same mistakes over and over again"
he laughed with you too, before moving to sit in front of you. he gently wiped the tears off your cheeks.
"don't cry about it, 'kay? i'm here for whatever you need" ao'nung assured you quietly.
you smiled at him.
"i'll be fine. he's just a guy" you laughed it off, not missing the way his hand didn't leave your cheek.
you had thought about ao'nung like that a few times, but you pushed away the thought every time. he was tsireya's brother, for eywa's sake. how would she react?
as a comfortable silence fell between you both, you glanced at his lips- you mean, his eyes. you could hear his breathing, unconsciously synchronizing yours with his. faces inching closer every second, losing control of what you were doing.
"fuck. i really want to kiss you" he whispered, lips so close they were fanning against the others'. "but it wouldn't be right. not now"
you nodded. you understood. you shared his worry. now wasn't the time; you had just called it quits with that boy- you hated how you weren't even a thing. it would seem like a rebound on your side and taking advantage on his, though that was far from the truth of your feelings, hidden, deemed as childish over the years.
as if on cue, you heard tsireya's happy and giddy steps. you and ao'nung scrambled away, not wanting to look suspicious to his sister. she entered the marui instants later, a smile painted bright on her face.
"well, well"
"someone had a nice time with forest boy" you teased.
"shut up!" she put on her best show to sound annoyed, but she was madly blushing and grinning.
"i, uh, i'll leave the two of you to catch up" ao'nung announced before walking out, not before directing one last glance your way.
"tell me everything!" he could hear you gushing as he walked away.
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you didn’t expect to see him. then again, you hadn’t seen him for a couple of weeks, so it was only a matter of time before you ran into him.
“i guess it’s kind of our thing, huh?” you joked, a smirk appearing on ao’nung’s face. “finding you when i come looking for tsireya”
“yeah, uh, well, you wanna come in?” he asked.
your mind flashed you a memory of the last time you’d been with him. but that only encouraged you further to come with him.
"so. how have you been?" ao'nung said once you entered.
"good. better. much better" you looked at him as you replied, grinning a bit.
“that’s nice”
awkwardness settled between you.
“tsireya’s out with lo’ak again” he bluntly spoke.
“figured”
you fidgeted with your fingers nervously, debating wether you should bring it up or just forget about it. your eyes danced around the room, averting your gaze to the spot on the floor besides your feet. your eyes could have burnt holes in the spots they bored into from the harshness of your stare.
so focused were you on the texture of the floor or whatever, you missed how ao'nung snaked closer to you. you remained oblivious to how near he stood now until his fingertips ghosted over your shoulder, making you turn around to face him.
he brushed a loose strand of hair away from your face, his own face hovering over yours. your eyes shot up to meet his, eyes round, looking at him with longing and desire.
and then you weren’t able to hold the need for him any longer. you kissed him, and eywa did it feel good. your lips fit like pieces of a puzzle.
you gave him enough time to regret it, to back away, to tell you this was just a misunderstandment, and never speak to you again. but he did more than just stop you. he kissed you back, feverishly, the hand that had been gracing your cheek now cupping your face, pulling you even closer to him. warmth blossomed in your chest, sparks igniting from ao'nung's touch.
your hands steady on his chest, your heartbeat quickening as your lips parted slightly, allowing his tongue to slip inside, mouths exploring each other with the suppressed eagerness from all the years prior, which had remained hidden to the other. he traveled your body with his free hand, trailing every curve, sailing above your skin. ao’nung felt like he wanted to learn every bit of you.
the kiss soon went from sweet to needy and blazing, holding onto each other as if you were going to disappear once you pulled away. maybe for the sole purpose of contradicting this thought, ao'nung broke the kiss just for an instant, just to look at your messy state: cheeks flushed, lips plump, a blessed expression upon your features. but then he resumed the kiss, impossibly deepening it. you two were almost absorbed by your own bubble, away from everything else.
that's why, perhaps, you didn't sense the person approaching until it was too late.
"what. the hell. is going on here?" tsireya's voice shrieked, making you abruptly pull away to face her.
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© heartcereql, 2023 || thank you for reading ! 𓆩 ♱ 𓆪
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anticapitalistclown · 25 days
Note
Hello! Can you do when they saw reader and their baby girl or boy sleeping together on the bed hc's? 🙊
omg sure! <3
since the characters aren't specified, I'll do the ones I get requested the most, if you don't mind.
Jake, Gun and Vin Jin reacting to reader and their baby sleeping together on the bed headcanons
Jake
he doesn't mind when his kids sneak in your shared bed
honestly, he appreciates the parenthood times, enjoying every hour he gets to spend with his kids, and you, his beloved family.
and finding you sleeping, snuggled with the life you both created, just melts his heart.
After a long day that he had out with the old big deal boys, Jake rushed home to his family, he sure had a great time with his friends, but it was late, and he so understands how hard it is to put both your sons to sleep.
Quietly he made his way into the bedroom, listening the sounds from the TV, there you were deep asleep, snuggling with your eldest son, your arms hugging him with care, his face resting on your chest, Jake knows from first hand how comforting it is to sleep hearing your heartbeat, your hold protecting the ones who are in, telling them that everything was fine there in your arms, he kissed your forehead. He directed his eyes to the youngest, he was awake, sitting next to you and your son, his eyes focused on the cartoons, his tiny hands not leaving the remote.
He sighted and closed the TV, too much screen would be bad for the baby, Jake held the youngest in his arms, rubbing the little one's back with his hand, walking around the apartment in order to make him sleep. It was successfully done, Jake didn't last long to join you on bed, your youngest sleeping close to his father.
Gun
Gun is the first one to spoil your daughter, so if his child is afraid, dad would not hesitate to bring her up to your shared bed.
having that little child in his arms, knowing that he can make her feel protected (because honestly she is truly protected) just calms him, as a father, he feels so grateful to have that child in his life.
you understood that co-sleeping was something normal in Japan, but doing whatever your daughter wants will just worse her attitude.
After finally getting home, he quietly made his way to your bedroom, spotting you cuddling with your daughter, and he was the one who had to take the blame for spoiling her?
He closed the light to prevent waking you both, his lips kissing the tip of your nose, making you grunt "shh, keep sleeping" he caressed your hair, putting some strands behind your ear, then his hand caressing your daughter's cheek. Then his eyes admiring her features, that silky black hair she got from him, her eyebrows she got from you, her nose she got from him, her cute lips, that always arcs in a smile whenever she sees him, that were just same as yours.
"thank you" he murmured, admiring you and the life you both created together, watching you both sleep until he joined soon after.
Vin Jin
he spent part of his childhood sleeping next to his mother, so he has no problem on having your daughter join you to sleep.
Vin is the one who tends to spoil her more, joking with her or extending bedtime in order to play more with her, that of course makes her to prefer sleeping with dad and mom.
also, since both of you work, having time with your daughter is quite difficult so even if it's sleeping together, Vin just wants to spend time with his family.
The weather was snowy, it was so cold that Vin just wanted to be home asap, while he was shivering from the cold, in his head he could only think of his daughter, hoping that she wasn't cold "I'll bring her to sleep with us".
When he got home he sighed with relief as he felt the warmth of home. He went to his daughter's room to take her to sleep with mom and dad, but he found her bed empty.
When he entered his room, he found you and your daughter sleeping snuggled, he smiled to himself, grateful of being able to see you both every day. He joined you both waking unintentionally you both "dad is cold" your daughter murmured, her little arms hugging him, your leg wrapped around his waist "we have to warm daddy" you murmured, Vin hugged you both on his arms, receiving your warmth
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nicolodigenovas · 3 months
Text
long live
dinner at andy’s goes as usual. quỳnh pretends not to know where everything is, just to have andy mutter “let me help,” shuffling to the kitchen with the newfound laziness of a mortal, aging body. on the way to the kitchen, andy’s arm goes around quỳnh’s waist, and a part of joe’s heart goes quiet. happy.
nicky tries very hard not to help setting up the table, since nile wants to do it and nicky never takes a moment to rest if there’s his family to feed. it doesn't matter that they all got quite decent at cooking, even quỳnh, though only after a crash course in modern kitchen appliances and flavours. joe resorts to back-hugging nicky to drag him to the sofa, and the two of them go down awkwardly, laughing like kids because nicky’s elbow has an uncanny ability to always find joe’s nose.
“It’s because I love your nose,” nicky tries to say in between laughter, and kisses apologetically joe’s nose, cheeks, mouth.
one casserole, two rounds of amari, one long ass reenactment of a failed heist later, nile wins at monopoly. she stands up and screams at nicky’s face, the loser, her face radiant with happiness and that tiny speck of pettiness that makes her so perfect in their little family. joe thinks of booker’s bets, for a tiny, insignificant moment that later turns gets turned into a premonition.
hours later, after nicky has washed the dishes and quỳnh has dried them, after andy shows off the new guest rooms —quỳnh does a terrible impression of someone who hasn’t been present every step of the renovation process—, joe gets a bit moody, the feeling he interprets as the emotional equivalent of feeling too full after a good meal. he was too happy tonight; he feels sick with nebulous anxiety and known melancholy, he wonders how many times they’ll get another moment of rest, happy and precious like this one, before andy dies. before any of them dies.
one terrible night, after losing quỳnh but before they met booker, joe thought he wanted to be the first one to die. he wished as much, selfishly, because he couldn’t bear the thought of so much grief. not again.
he’s doing better now. he is proud of himself for that, and grateful for nicky, for nile, who is still, a decade later, a breath of fresh air for all of them, his little sister. if he thinks about quỳnh coming back for too long, his eyes starts to prickle with happy tears.
he goes outside for a breath of fresh air and solitude. his phone buzzes while he stares at the fog in the countryside, and joe stupidly thinks: 'they're calling me to tell me andy died'. he has been having nightmares about it.
it's booker. the sigh on the other side of the phone is unmistakable, and there it is, the anger, lighting joe up from the inside. it hurts to miss him so much.
"joe," booker says, "joe, i need to tell you first. i'm not coming back."
joe waits for an explanation because there's simply too much, right now, that could be interpreted as premature grief running cold down his spine.
"i am not meeting you in London, when the time comes. i promise i'll tell andy, i'll tell nile, but you first. i promise it's not bad."
joe forces himself to breathe. he has spent so much time as booker's best friend that he speaks from habit, freshly dusted after more than ten years.
"what did you do, booker?", lower, "are you safe?"
"yes. i'm still in france. i met someone."
booker was a great forger, and before that a decent liar. maybe better than decent. his face always kept a kernel of truth even while telling the wildest story, a light that made him look honest. the trick was to make a guilty face even when telling hard truths. joe can imagine booker's face right now, the glint in his eyes. he pictures booker in an empty room, for privacy from his lover. booker with his shoulders raised and tense as if ready for a fight.
joe doesn't know what to say. he is a romantic at heart. he knows that for someone like booker, the empty space next to him on the bed matters, is the place where a few ghosts from the past go to rest. he didn't have the same worries for friends of theirs who never wished for romance, but booker was always the type of man to join a barfight for a woman. immortality took away that piece of him, but it was there in his youth.
"how did it happen?" a pause. "are you sober?"
if betrayal didn't sit on his chest he may have been more merciful, kinder. as it is, he stares at the moon and hurts the whole time it takes booker to answer.
"i have been sober for eight years. i want to do this right. i know i don't deserve it, but, joe, i met her and i forgot it all. i would talk to her for two minutes and feel lighter on the way home. she has two kids from her first marriage."
oh, booker. "don't do this to yourself again. it'll end badly."
"no, joe, i know. i told her i couldn't be with her, and she understood. she was angry and hurt, and i left. we didn't speak for a year. we were neighbours, it was fucking difficult, but i didn't even look at her."
"but then I was cutting onions."
booker's accent gets strong for a moment, the same way nicky's mouth still clings to a volgare that is now centuries behind modern italian. booker talks like he's already at the punchline, and joe, who doesn't get it yet, holds his breath. hears the moment booker's voice cracks with happiness.
"I cut my finger and it stayed that way. Joe."
Joe, again, like the old times, when joe had a new brother. he will always have a french brother, he thinks. realises from the outside looking in, like he's writing the scene in a diary. long after booker's death, joe will always have a brother.
"why are you making me cry," he says, barely keeping in the pain and happiness. "why aren't you here to tell me."
"i will come to say goodbye. i just wanted you to know first, and i have to do this right, i can't leave for long. i want to be a good dad."
joe finds a plastic chair under the backyard porch and sits down, with one hand he lets his long hair fall down on his shoulders. he imagines booker braiding some kid's hair, but the image is fuzzy, he doesn't have enough details yet to begin to understand booker's new life. to think that a hundred years ago, you were all ours, and i thought we'd know each other forever.
"are you happy?"
"i'm sorry, joe. i really am."
"why are you saying sorry? this is the first time you're making sense this century. i just hate that we'll never see you again."
booker hesitates: "i could visit. you could."
"and put the kids at risk? leave traces? how will you explain us, when you're grey and i'm still this beautiful?"
the joke lands on wet laughter. "just once, then. distant younger friends from my past drop by for a chat, then will always be too busy to visit us again."
"nicky will try to speak french." because he will forgive you first for leaving us.
there's a distant voice coming from booker's end. joe tries and fails to understand the words. booker answers with 'one moment' in a voice that doesn't sound as old as he really is.
"i have to go back to nicky," joe says. "call nile tomorrow."
"i will tell the kids all the stories. i will tell them your names."
joe closes his eyes. he has lived for so long, there are hundreds of stories that talk about him like he's already dead, and not alive, still, with a family.
"okay, book. talk to you tomorrow. be safe."
the call ends and it's like it never happened, except a weight has been lifted from joe's chest. he feels strangely adrift, but lucky to witness the fog rising. he doesn't notice the cold until nicky joins him outside and with warmer hands brings him back where he belongs.
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