#but i think that's as accurate as i'll get for him

[thurio-edau]

SBG GANG MENTAL ANALYSIS

yup, him for part two. funny thing despite Aiden being my favourite character I'm most excited for the other three posts I'll make, especially the last one. there's a lot to unpack here so

also im writing this with a migraine pls read it-

Part 2: Aiden Clark

ah, yes. the obviously-mentally-ill from the start fan favourite Aiden Clark. let's go.

first, I want to start with something I find really important about his character, what makes him heavily mischaracterized in the fandom. the 'psychopath' cliche.

the terms 'psychopath', 'insane' and 'unstable' are often confused with each other due to media stereotypes, such as Aiden here. one, he is not a psychopath. psychopath literally means a self-centered person who lacks sympathy, affection and care; making them far from most other characters in their franchise. their lack of sympathy/empathy often makes them criminalized, here

disturbing content warning, for an example of a psychopath.

let's take Gressil from Homesick for example since a lot of SBG readers also read Homesick. so, here, Gressil is a perfect example of an actual psychopath. his lack of empathy makes him torment others, he's very self-centered. and when asked why he's doing this? he says he was bored. let's look at Aiden here. what does Aiden do when bored? probably dumb ideas or annoy Tyler. not torturing people for fun. Aiden is just a boy who likes thrills, but he has a sense of empathy, care and justice.

you wanna see a psychopathic Aiden?? the canvas is it

(our local Logan hater is publishing the canvas eps go checc beachy out)

but that's him, not our Aiden. canvas does not equal originals y'all

alright, now since we got that cleared out!! firstly, ADHD.

I think everyone in the fandom is already aware that Aiden is ADHD but I'm still going to talk about it just like Ashlyn's autism. Red has also said that she wrote Aiden with ADHD in mind but hadn't canonically confirmed anyone as neurodivergent. let's start with the main symptoms of ADHD, also known as Attention Decifit and Hyperactivity Disorder.

I know about 5 different ADHD people myself and did some research, it probably won't be extremely accurate since I'm not ADHD myself, but I'll try to do whatever I can. first with the AD part, Attention Decifit.

now as seen, he doesn't exactly have any problems with theorizing itself. but the problem is that his attention just goes away easily.

i mean cmon bro was making memes on the job

he tries to do work, but can't. he has a low attention span which makes him not able to concentrate. he can't keep it up for long, he'll get distracted or bored too easily about things that doesn't interest in specially.

it's just distracting. what his attention is on constantly changes, there's more to that after the ADHD part but we're here for now.

the hyperactivity... it's a lot more apparent. but I should explain the insane-unstable thing before that.

insane means that someone's mental health is not in an okay situation, where it prevents the person from thinking normally, acting rationally, very often found together with delusions. the person is seriously mentally ill where it might count as a disability.

unstable, however, where someone is prone to psychiatric problems, has moodswings etc. they're not exactly the most sane person, but they aren't insane either. Aiden here, obviously falls on the unstable side. maybe just a little bit insane if you squint. this will be brought up later too, but it mixed well with his hyperactivity too.

and as we all know, our boy isn't exactly the most stable person. (sorry for the collages, but since there is a tumblr picture limit i have to keep on collaging. yes i learnt from the last time) his hyperactivity mixes with his unstable mindset which makes him incresingly vulnerable to danger- which he likes. from when the first shift happened, he's been really careless about stuff but it's been all about his love for thrill.

and it irritates Tyler, too.

the main subplot about his character is that he's a person of excitement. guess what? ADHD people like the excitement, they like new things, they like the adrenaline and thrill. now, Aiden's main characteristic of being unstable mixed with ADHD makes him an even more reckless person. another thing mixing with the hyperactivity, is boundaries.

this part will mostly be about Ashlyn since the boundary issue only happens with her.

I talked about this on Ashlyn's side on my Ashlyn analysis, now it's time for Aiden's side.

he's really annoying to her at first. Ashlyn is someone with lots of boundaries, like high walls. and who tries to climb them with his dumbass? Aiden of course.

she kept rejecting his efforts to befriend her for some time, until the night they stole the jeep. then she managed to actually bring the walls down, and accept them all into her life. but damn was she blunt.

felt that honestly

and Aiden understands her that night, too.

Ashlyn was hesistant to hug him, yes, he was aware. but she still did which made him realize she was also trying. i have to tell you, people with ADHD and people with autism either have trouble getting along, or go perfectly well. my ADHD sibling for example, I have to push them away for a lot and tell them to lower their voice. but once they remember my boundaries it actually becomes a normal, even pleasant hangout. which, Aiden realizes and tries to get along with. he tries.

seeing his efforts on her boundaries makes something click in her mind. and she starts to be a lot nicer when they hang out in the arcade.

Aiden eventually learns and remembers what she's like and what she loves to do. he already tried to watch her ballet sessions once -got slammed-, he's been to her room where he remembered the mat from and her fighting makes it obvious. I'm sure he knew he'd get cooked by betting that. but he still did,

because he knew it'd interest her. which he succeeded, he saw her smile again. the arcade day went great until Barron and his gang pulled up, but if we ignore that part it all went well. Aiden started to understand and respect her boundaries.

anyways then Tyler fucking dies

he knows that Ashlyn feels guilty. Aiden wants to comfort her through it, but also do it correctly. without going over any boundaries. which makes him really,

really,

really surprised when she responds.

also including this pannel cause its hilarious

here we see that he's still trying. hell, I'm sure he spent minutes thinking if he should come close physically to help her. that's probably why he just nudged her softly before anything else. he's not used to it, he has to conciously make an effort to not cross said boundaries. keeping his voice lower, try to not be so reckless, not doing anything physically close unless she reciprocates. wow how i wish another someone i knew irl tried that hard instead of blaming it on me cOUGH COUGH COUGH

also other small things to include

he's yapping a lot

he has a comically large amount of puzzles in his backpack for one single trip

and sticks his head into lamps for some reason

but that's just Aiden and his little neurodivergent brain for ya.

now the part I wanted to get to the most.

Borderline Personality Disorder.

first, what is Borderline Personality Disorder?

shortened as BPD, borderline is when someone's mood is inconsistent and swinging. think of it's name; the person's mental state is in the border, in the border line, switching up fastly. the most easily understood and common type is when the person goes from a depression to a happy state. but no matter which state they are in and/or go to, one thing stays the same: it is unstable.

one thing about borderline is that it is frequently mixed with bipolar. however bipolar is a neurodivengercy which means it is what someone is born with and cannot be changed. but borderline is obtained later in life. it usually happens with depression. bipolar is much more random and the episodes last longer in comparison. it may last up to hours, and the person's memory might have trouble remembering their episodes. borderline, on the other hand, is a short-lived mood swing.

now here. here's the catch; people with BPD during mood swings can have reckless behaviour, suicidal thoughts -in his case as far as we know, lowered sense of protecting himself- or a loss of understanding danger. sounds familiar?

borderline's recklessness and dangerousness, sometimes self-destructive acts combines with ADHD's love for thrill and excitement, combined with Aiden's own personality all make up for a great condition of instability.

Aiden's behaviour constantly goes crazy, I think his most frequent mood swing might be his normal self (at least, as normal as he could be) to this more maniac way of acting. I noticed it from his eyes, when he's in a more calm-ish normal state his pupils are a bit more dilated. in the pictures above, you can clearly see that he's still in the episode; filled with the adrenaline, the unstable way of thinking.

but, what causes that? surely a mental illness such as borderline doesn't happen on it's own.

right?

cause it didn't.

it never works that way.

but it can get better.

eventually.

but what happened to him?

personally, as much as a large amounnt of people seems to believe it's something like family abuse I don't think so. maybe neglect, maybe withdrawal, maybe maybe. but we've seen his parents. I don't think they would hurt him like that. I can't put any more pictures, but this is the last part anyway. his parents seem to be kind and gentle, despite that picture in his house. I'm thinking the picture was only for the dramatic effect. his parents said that he used to be really calm and quiet during Lily's birthday, and both Aiden and Ben seem comfortable around them. they were happy taking Ben in too, any kind of abusive parent wouldn't do that at least that's what I believe. also there is that Aiden got serious and concerned when he learnt that their parents were also in the facility, most likely worried for his own as you would have thought.

there was a post that I've been trying to find for like half an hour, I commented on it but I can't find the post now. the person talked about their own theory. if I remember correctly it was that when Aiden was depressive as a child, his parents took him to a thrilling activity like the ones he's been talking about (bungee-jumping, skydiving etc.) and the thrill made him actually get excited. which is why his parents allowed him to go even more reckless, because they are aware of how prone their son could be to the depression.

what happened? let's ignore the parents factor. someone can have a loving family and still be traumatized, someone can be taken care of and still feel abandoned, someone can never have confronted a situation they are terrified of.

one of my theories is that, the loneliness. it must get to a child heavily considering children need to not be left alone, but Aiden was. he didn't have any actual friends since they always moved from one place to another from his parents' business, and they might have not had enough time to make for him (which I believe is bullshitting, every child deserves to be taken some time out for. some people quit their jobs entirely for their child.) and be unaware, and that doesn't change that he was still depressed and alone. his depressive state was seemingly before Ben was taken in. now here one thing with borderline, at least from my experience, is faking actions. smiles, laughs, friendships, conversations... almost as if there's two different lives; one fake, and one real. you keep on switching, you keep on swinging between the sides where you're yourself and where you're just mimicking 'normal human behaviour'.

it starts from faking a happy state during their depression, and by time you're faking it it becomes an automatic adition to your personality. to your mind. once it furthers, it becomes the disorder. Aiden we see is always smiling. it becomes a habit that only breaks sometimes. now, I'm not saying his smile is fake- I think his face is literally just stuck like that. it breaks ever so slightly sometimes. fake it till ya make it yanno? that kind of thing. and when he swings from his calm mood to his borderline-d mood, his pupils get small and his smile gets worse. noticably worse. I'll be rereading the series (AGAIN) and this time look at all the small details since Red loves putting them and I love theorizing so

which, wraps up the Aiden thing! im actually really proud of how i could put my thoughts into text which i never could. i'd love any additions because i love other opinions as well.

and you know what? im glad Ash and Ai are out of the place because the rest are what I'm actually looking forward to >:)

...and i should sleep. really.

(wow sorry yall i finished this hours ago and said 'alright reread to make sure its good before sleep' and fell asleep through it lol sorry for 4 hour delay ig)

(leaving for school rn see yall 8 hours later 🫡)

#sbg #sbgblr #sbg (webtoon) #school bus graveyard #school bus graveyard webtoon #schoolbus graveyard #aiden clark #ashlyn banner #sbg aiden #sbg ashlyn

[lunarspiral1127]

X-Men 97 episode 6 *SPOILERS*

Shi'ar Empire/Space

Honestly, I wasn't expecting to see them and get an update on Xavier in this episode cause I thought this was gonna be the full Lifedeath conclusion, so more focus on Storm. But, I think it's nice to see how he's doing.

This is the first time we see Deathbird AKA Lilandra's sister in the X-Men animated series, and I like her look.

Gladiator is such a stoic bad@$$. Ngl, after seeing him fight after so long, Superman popped into my head. I think it was the powerset he displayed.

Ronan and the Kree! I wasn't expecting to see them cause we never had the Kree mentioned or shown in the previous show, so this was a nice surprise. Aldo, it's so refreshing to see Ronan the Accuser in his more comic- accurate outfit. Cause, I've only recently seen him and the Kree in their MCU outfits, so seeing the classics was nice.

Noticed Vulcan during the beginning....kinda awkward cause he's Scott's other brother. Dunno if they'll do anything with that, but then again, they didn't do much with Havok in the previous show.

It's good to see Xavier healthy again, but why hasn't he checked up on the X-Men during that year? Why didn't he let them know that he's okay? Is it because of that black hole?

Didn't know Xavier was interested in being Lilandra's....pet....psychics be kinky.

Xavier talking about Magnus....oh god, when he finds out what happened to him....

Man, even in space, mutants can't catch a break! Xavier gonna be emperor along with Lilandra, and these sunsofbeeches hate it cause he's Terran AND a mutant. Like, can the mutants EVER get anything nice?!

Xavier was willing to forgo his memories on Earth and of his friends and family. Just to be with Lilandra....god dammit, this show really is a soap opera.

Xavier educating the Shi'ar council, Deathbird, Gladiator, and even Lilandra on their system and why it's bad was pretty funny. Dude was going back to being a teacher. And, I thought he was succeeding until....

The vision. Now, he knows what happened to Genosha, and he gotta go back. Good, cause they need him more than ever. I just wish it didn't have to break him and Lilandra up. Like, can we have a good relationship that doesn't end in a breakup, death, or have way too much drama, please?!?!

GAMBIT!!! 😭 It still hurts! But, the vision could also be foreshadowing that he'll become Death of the Four Horsemen. And Magneto wasn't there, so does that mean he survived?!

Storm, Forge, and the Adversary

Storm called Forge "my love". She was mad at him earlier, but I guess despite the anger, she loves him too and understood that he tried to help her despite what he did.

The Adversary is spooky. I didn't get how they appeared, but from what the show says, the demon appears to feed on the self-loathing, so they sensed Forge AND Storm and came to them.

Storm's fear of tight spaces comes into play. The Adversary used her fear against her which almost worked. First time Forge was able to banish the demon, despite being poisoned, and the second time, Storm overcame her fears and doubts and got her powers back.

Oh yeah, MISTRESS OF THE ELEMENTS IS BACK!!! 🤩 She even got her iconic black outfit with the tiara! I'll miss her classic white outfit, though. And she got her long hair back! No offense to the mohawk.

Shoutout to @stormandforge for talking about how she got her powers back cause I was so confused and sleep-deprived. What makes the most sense was the machine Forge used worked. It's just that she had some kind of mental/psychological block going on with her powers and had to overcome it to reactivate them. Kinda like how Peter lost his powers in Spider-Man 2. As for how she got her outfit, well, Storm, in the very first episode in the previous show, used her lightning to change outfits. So, I chopped it off to that. Yeah, lightning doesn't work like that, but she looks beautiful! The hair was actually what I was most confused about cause she had a mohawk, and suddenly, her hair got long again? I thought some parts of her head was shaved. So how did her change? Same way as the outfit?

Forge is cured, so fingers crossed these two will be together and not end poorly and messy as it did in the comics. Please, I just need one good relationship in this freaking show that isn't gonna end in tragedy.

And she knows about Genosha. God, I really hope she doesn't get survivors guilt over this. But, we need her and Xavier more than ever with what's to come.

The rest

Y'know, it was one thing for Trask to be involved with the massacre, but Mr. Sinister? I wasn't expecting that. I thought it was the FoH or Apocalypse or maybe Nimrod. Either way, I'm mad now that I know who's responsible cause how dare them kill Gambit, Magneto, Leech and the others, and hurt Nightcrawler and Rogue! I really hope that they find a way to finish him off for good and make it hurt like hell!

NIGHTCRAWLER GOT TO BE PART OF THE INTRO!!! 🤩 Does that mean he's gonna be finally part of the X-Men? Will we ever get him using his swords? Cause they keep teasing that!

I just wish it wasn't at the expense of Magneto and Gambit's intros. Man, I was bracing myself, and they had to do that and the recap! UGH, IT STILL HURTS! 😭

The episodes have really alternated with multiple storylines in this show. The previous one usually focuses on one story at a time.

So, that's pretty much it. Good episode. One more episode left until even more trauma will be inflicted on us cause 8-10 are gonna be a doozy.

#x men 97 #x-men 97 #xmen 97 #episode 6 #episode six #x men 97 spoilers #marvel #charles xavier #lilandra #storm #ororo munroe #forge

[ratwithhands]

Got dragged to two (2!!) parties and had to wait until I got home so I could stay up and finish this. So verrry tired.

Anyways, here's Emmet at Anville taking pictures of the turntable from the bridge. Thought I'd give him a typical railfan hobby, so here he is doing train photography. I heard that photographer railfans in Japan are called Toritetsu so ig that could be a descriptor? Homeboy just likes getting their good angles to look at later. Hope you like it and see you later.

#submas #subwaymasteremmet #emmetpokemon #kudari #monthofemmet #pokemon #pokemonfanart #The twins are just generally obsessed with trains #Could've put anything from model building to construction analysis for his hobby #I do think Emmet would be the type to tell you fun facts about whatever train car you are riding with him that day if you ask #ALSO minor hc but I feel like Emmet doodles at work and they sometimes get used as graphics on event posters #“Surely no one will notice a sheet of paper going missing!” and he comes back after a bathroom break to find all the staff #looking over it and pointing out where they'd been drawn #wonder if they get kept on the office corkboard or if Ingo steals them for keepsakes before Emmet can put them in his bag #but yeah I was considering that for this prompt but I figured this is more accurate to his character #maybe I'll draw him doodling on the Free Space for the 31

[sundial-bee-scribbles]

meadowsweet

#my art lol #my ocs #lucian #floral #floral aesthetic #muted colors #off white #green #pink #yeah i have. no fucking idea what to tag this lmfaooo 😭😭 i never know what to tag my original shit its just. here #i'd tag it fashion or smthn but idk that outfit is. not 100% historically accurate at all. lookin at those shorts and thigh high socks LOL #this was inspired by some stuff i saw when looking up victorian fashion on here! not a canon outfit for him rip but let him wear smthn nice #also yeah meadowsweet is supposed to be that flower he's holding. it has no actual significance in his story its just here for aesthetic #but it does carry the meaning of 'uselessness' so that's fun :) #i just felt like drawin smthn w/ him again ive been thinking abt him and the other protagonist shitheads again... thangs. #i have this one text post idea thing i wanna make but i'll see if i get around to it. SOBBINGGG I DONT WANT SUMMER TO B OVER #also i think my inbox is finally not broken??? thats unrelated tho

[tomurakii]

Just had the meeting with Mystra after I told Gale I'd support him going God mode. He's being a little worrying...

#i did save during the convo so I could go back #but should I??? i feel like this would be the “real” ending my tav would get. but I also feel like maybe #i should've gone the “you're enough as you are' route. perhaps I'll run it again and see if his post-mystra dialogue changes #cause like. as a (recently oathbroken oops lol) revenge paladin I think encouraging him to strive for godhood to do good is the #accurate choice. and then as he starts getting a lil crazy “it chose me” about it she would go 'calm down gale' which is what i did. #just torn between the RP-accurate ending where my boyfriend goes insane and the good wholesome ending lol #bg3 #baldur's gate 3 #gale dekarios #bg3 spoilers

[obeymeow]

being neurodivergent is all fun and games until you remember those hourly quote bots on twitter and think well maybe I can't make a bot anymore but I could schedule a few quotes a day, that shouldn't be hard. it sounds fun to have a bunch of quotes of my favorite character Thirteen from hit mobile game Obey Me! and its sequel Obey Me! Nightbringer. and then you think about how arduous collecting the quotes is going to be but she's only been in the games for maybe a year and a half with little screentime and you love collecting things so you start but then you remember that you love collecting things so naturally you have ALL of her screentime in the game and suddenly you have 45k characters of quotes and are several lessons into season 4 (which is truly a trial in and of itself) but not nearly close enough to the end but you refuse to just stop collecting the quotes and make the account with the EXCESS of what you have already because you literally only have season 4 to get through and if you don't do it just seeing the bot (because now you've been informed you can make tumblr bots instead) will haunt you with that knowledge even if nobody else would ever know. this is a general anecdote of a situation that could easily happen to anyone though and not in any way related to my life

#obey me on side #ummm i don't have a personal tag yet because i hated looking at this blog before the revamp so i'll do that later #with the carrd. usually when i say i'll do something later it means sometime in the next 3 years but i actually mean this one #but rn there's no way to tell i'm a lesbian (except for the thirteen icon. + probably also the ruri-chan banner she's lesbian colors) #okay maybe you can tell but I want to be CLEAR #anyway i would also like to note that immediately before starting this project i spent a full week lamenting my lack of free time #because I wanted to write some fics. and then literally as soon as i got free time I went um. no. quote doc instead I think #????? girl why did you do that to yourself #fortunately i'm now bored of reading s4 so i can go back to writing #unrelated but all of these fics contain a significant amount of solomon and i like him that's not surprising but it was unintentional #which IS surprising. like okay one of them is about solodeus (specifically mc playing matchmaker so i don't clickbait) so that's obligatory #and another is based off of the new solomon card (IT'S CUTE) so that's also kind of obligatory #(the third one is based off of luke's card from the dnd nightmare a while back because i was entranced by its strange unbalanced party) #but usually i try to switch up the characters i write about to get comfy with all of them and not just the ones that make sense to me #that's not entirely accurate it's my one braincell bouncing around like a windows screensaver picking a new fave every time it hits a side #but also to get used to writing them all. anyway #i'll just write about satan to balance it he's always been a fav but i am obsessed with him in nightbringer he is so offputting and tragic #if you're still reading these tags please see above on th 'later is up to three years' in regards to the fics still haven't posted anything #hoping to change that soon though I WILL eventually.

[artekai]

got a figure like a pin-up, got a figure like a doll

#happy second birthday kai!!! :D or. name birthday i guess! name day? 🤔 #by my own logic. he *would* celebrate it today since he wouldn't know the ACTUAL day he was born. so. he gets two birthdays :3 #(it's important to me ok 👉👈) #oc tag #oc art #oc: artekai #horizon oc #horizon au #deni's stuff #deni's art #blood cw #i'm thinking he might've looked better in blue but i wanted to see him in pink for a change 🤔 #i should've given him splotches of blood and stains on his outfit but if i have to look at this any longer i'll genuinely lose my mind 😭 #i'm sorry please imagine they're there ;-; #most of the lineart was done for valentine's. VALENTINE'S #i hit a wall because uhm. i was too lazy to draw a canonically accurate bow #so this sat in my wip folder for MONTHS but FINALLY i've got it! :D

[spacerangersam]

found a pair of aviator frames on the road the other day, so wolfman Pat's got the right glasses. No closer to getting a scouts uniform, but I did make a small badge for him

#i also got something i could use to make an arrow...but honestly #i think I'll just get him a fun outfit than a cankn accurate one. itll be a lot eaiser #also gonna redo the ghost one in the first pic because it is a Mess

[vigilbutts]

ok ok you know what

little 5am ramble moment ummm because i wanna talk a lil about some EoD stuff with Luis, because while he doesn't do all that much directly w/the story (that's Kalla's business) there IS still some stuff happening with him.

But basically to put it simply, he winds up learning (or really more like just manifesting) some specter fun stuff. Effectively being a specter but with deadeye rifle. WE MULTI TRACK DRIFTING NOW Most importantly of the specter fun stuff is specter shroud, which also REALLY freaks him out when he taps into it the first time. To be fair, he freaked out because his hands became incorporeal and smoky??? Swirling masses of blue and purple shadow??? He's pretty sure that is not how hands are supposed to be?? And it was a very Weird feeling! Felt kinda cold and tingly and numb at the same time! Now he knows what the sensation feels like when he no-clips out of someone's grip, though. Deep down he is a terrified anxious creature so he hates surprises and tends to catastrophize. He does put away the worry that it's void corruption within a few days because it is proven to be unrelated, but still does not put down the worry that something is very wrong with him. (there are many things wrong with him but he's known about those things already for years lol) as to how he keeps developing new things. Well, he's been through a lot and the removal of the Orrian curse had some Interesting surprise effects and unlocked a lot of weird enhanced abilities. Because to break the curse without causing him harm, he was infused with magic to put it simply. also hanging around for various big cataclysmic events where a FUCKTON of magic got released into the world helps. He might have missed most of the dragons but he didn't miss Balthazar getting pasted. No, he helped with that one because things were Personal :') Also got front row seats to Primordus and Jormag (and almost died again, but that's another story)

Also side note! his shadowstep "noclip" abilities are a bit more powerful than in-game stuff. He can take people with him when he noclips so long as he's physically touching them and chooses to do so. It feels a little funky, a little dizzying for whoever he's giving a ride to. This is, however, very draining on Luis too, and causes his illness to flare up due to the strain on his body. TLDR: his alac specter build is Fully Canon now but he also still does a big shooty with his favorite rifle.

#text #luis fiernfal #ok im just gonna tag my insomnia rambles now ->->-> #insomnia posting #that's the new tag bois #am i gonna look at this later after some sleep and be like ' hey ur words dont make sense bud'???? #i hope it makes sense bc i think its fun! #i'm having fun <:3 #i call it noclip because it's funny and more accurately describes the Weird vibes his teleporting/shadowstepping abilities have. #he like 'warps' through things weird and in an almost glitchy way #because it's “borrowed” magic - something he shouldn't have and yet does #also why it can cause him Issues and make him quite ill when he taps into it a bunch #ok ok i've been workin on this rambly post for an hour time to yeet it into the tumblr abyss #ALSO ITS BEEN A YEAR & IM STILL DECIDING THINGS ABOUT HOW KALLA DEALS WITH EOD EVENTS DONT JUDGE ME #I'LL GET THERE SOMETIME!!! #LMAOOOOO

[malkaviian]

how to realize i've had enough academically speaking today: i started to think about rafael and luca's domestic life, in case they somehow meet and get together after rafael's divorce.

#oc talk #i imagine he would be heartbroken but luca would be able to lift his spirits just by existing. luca would come home #after doing grocery shopping and he would be like 'ah!! i forgot salt and cheese!' while rafael's all 'its ok<3 i'll buy it get comfy' #he would be. really protective; the type to kill the bug except luca would feel bad so he asks him to put it outside instead. #these little kind gestures he shows through the day would enamour him more tbh. i dont think they would fight that much #because luca is just too soft to get angry; and he would be way too soft towards him to get angry at anything he does. #ok maybe he would get a bit angry on the whole 'not doing anything else besides blocking to the person who sends me death threats' #but its not directed at him its more the frustration over the fact he seems to be too kind and non confrontational for his own good. #a family can be a femboy who lives off streaming on twitch; a divorced soldier #and the guy who seems part of their lives because he loves to send said femboy horrific and medically accurate death threats. #also finally luca can live off something that isnt delivery or instant noodles because rafael will cook sometimes for the both of them #although he also doesnt know to cook. a lot of things bc charlotte used to be in charge of that (like the fucking patriarchy /j /s) #but hey at least they can eat homemade soup. or chicken wings. its better than nothing. #another thing is that he would feel suspicious of anything luca's fans send him and inspect the package just to see it doesnt contains. #an explosive or something KJDNKJDSNFJNJ the package needs to surpass his vibe check /j #oh and he would feel extremely awkward appearing on stream even if accidentally so whenever luca is Working™ #he secludes himself on the living room and talks to mary or smth. luca on the other hand would probably talk about him on stream #whenever he knows he will be busy and not come home for a few days or more. he would miss him a lot:c #another thing before going to sleep and because i needed to say it: rafael's sex life would suffer a significant downgrade. and i dont mean #that sex became bad; moreso he doesnt have sex like. ever. his meat stick has no use now besides peeing #maybe now that hes dating someone though luca may be open to have sex SOMETIMES; but for him sometimes is like. 1 time every 2 months #and rafael's used to be way more sexually active (plus the few times would need to be way softer compared to how he was used with charlotte #i imagine that can be a bit frustrating tbh and as any guy traumatized by being cheated on (even more on his case) he would be #somewhat scared that luca doesnt likes him actually and that hes already looking for someone else/has someone else 'satisfying' him already #he realizes it doesnt makes sense at all because hes not that type of person; or so it seems. he was already tricked once for years. #but its ok they will find a solution because theyre 💖💘💖IN LOVE💖💘💖 the lingerie luca had for onlyfans could be useful for something #probably

[swiftispunk]

good to me, part three | joel miller x f!reader

joel masterlist | masterlist | kofi | follow @swiftispunkupdates for fic notifs

pairing: gynecologist!joel miller x female!reader rating: 18+ explicit word count: 5.4k

summary: after your first proper date with dr. miller, you make an unexpected stop at his usual practice. warnings etc: [NO OUTBREAK] doctor/patient shenanigans in the sense that they fuck in a doctor's office but also they go on a real date, smut, vaginal fingering, just a hint of oral (f receiving), medical kink, protected p in v sex, dirty talk, pet names, competency kink, praise kink (one "good girl"), so much squirting, multiple orgasms, glove kink, alcohol, food, reader is described as wearing a dress. no use of y/n. disclaimer: obviously i am not a gynecologist ya'll so i make no guarantees that the language used here will be one hundred per cent accurate. this is wish fulfillment, not medical school. anyway this is just supposed to be a bit of silly, horny fun so pls just take it for what it is or scroll on by if it's not your thing thank you love you bye

part one | part two

a/n: this is it for these two but thank you all so much for coming on this horny little journey with me. and, as ever, an extra thank you to @joelscruff for convincing me this was good enough to post.

You wait a perfectly reasonable five days before you call him. It's about as long as you can stand.

He picks up on the second ring, seemingly thrilled to hear from you. The sound of his voice on the other side of the phone gives you pause; there's something about hearing it beyond the white walls of an exam room that feels unnervingly material. Your anticipation brims, and suddenly the date he arranges for three days from now seems much too far away.

Part of you still thinks it might have all been a dream. His touch and his mouth and his fucking tongue; god, just the memory of how he'd made you feel is enough to make you throb. You're not sure you've stopped floating since he'd left you on that table.

It's not until you see him leaning against a streetlamp in front of the fancy restaurant he'd chosen, clad in a navy blue suit accessorized with a disarming smile, that you're forced to face the facts. That Dr. Miller is indeed a real man, a real man who'd made you come so hard that you're wet just at the sight of him, your body reacting even before he takes your hand in his and kisses the back of your knuckles.

It shouldn't come as a surprise, but talking with him is as easy as anything else, his impeccable bedside manners translating seamlessly to his real-world persona. You chat work and life and what's good here? I'll have that, then. He asks you questions and listens to your answers and you try not to focus too hard on the curve of his smile or the way his tongue darts out between his lips to occasionally lap a stray drop of cab sauv.

He tells you to call him Joel and you do, curiously trying it on like a brand new dress -

"Thank you for the wine, Joel."

"That's fascinating, Joel."

"Will you please take me home and fuck me so hard I can't think straight, Joel?"

You manage to keep that last one to yourself, though it's getting harder and harder with each passing minute to pretend you're not dying to get out of here so Dr. Miller can make good on his promise. He covers your hand with his on the table and you have to physically restrain yourself from dragging him into the bathroom just to feel his fingers elsewhere.

As it is, you cross your legs in search of friction as Dr. Miller generously pays for dinner and guides you out of the restaurant with a hand on the small of your back.

"What made you get into gynecology?" you ask while you stroll hand-in-hand along the sidewalk. He lives nearby, and for that, you're grateful.

Dr. Miller sighs.

"Always knew I wanted to get into medicine," he explains. "Like helpin' people. Heard too many horror stories 'bout folks hatin' their gynecologists...guess I thought this was the field I could do the most good."

At that, your heart swells and you resist the urge to pinch yourself. Handsome, chivalrous and good-hearted? It's like someone made him in a lab.

"That's very noble of you," you tell him truthfully.

Dr. Miller smiles down at you and for a moment you lose yourself in his sweet brown eyes until something over your shoulder catches his attention.

"S'my usual practice," he says, nodding to a innocuous looking two-storey walk-up behind you.

You turn to follow his eyeline and stop dead in your tracks.

A directory of names beside the building's door inexplicably makes your skin tingle, heat pooling along your spine when you see the words, Joel Miller, MD, Obstetrician-gynecologist listed among the building's other inhabitants.

"Y-your practice?" you stammer dumbly, tearing your eyes away from his name to find him grinning down at you.

"Mhm," he nods.

You blink between him and the directory while Dr. Miller watches you with bemusement.

You don't know what comes over you, or even what you're hoping for but you fucking need to see inside.

"Can we go in?" you find yourself asking. You press your face up against the glass door. There are no lights on, not a soul in sight.

Dr. Miller chuckles, glancing over his shoulder at the dark of night around him before checking the time on his watch. "It's after hours."

"And?" you press.

He assesses your expectant face, something devilish passing over his gaze. He laughs once, cocking his eyebrows as he begins to fish his keys out of his pocket.

His office is on the second floor, the very last door at the end of a long hallway. None of the neighbouring offices appear to show signs of life, and Dr. Miller's office is no exception. It feels like sneaking around, like breaking into your high school after midnight. And while you're sure there are no laws against a doctor popping into his own practice after hours, there is something that feels slightly dangerous about it all.

When you reach his office, you strain your eyes against the dark to see his name carved into a placard - a sight that makes you inexplicably warm - while Dr. Miller takes one last look over his shoulder, at last unlocking the door and guiding you inside.

He drops your hand to let you step into the room, locking the door behind him and flicking on the lights. You gaze in wonder at the cozy waiting room, smiling to yourself at how much it feels like him.

Everything about it is warm and inviting, a dark patterned carpet dotted with rustic furnishings; a few soft, cushioned chairs and a live edge wood coffee table. Beige walls adorned with naturalistic artwork, all browns and yellows and reds, illuminated under not fluorescent overhead lighting but warm, golden flood lights.

The space puts you immediately at ease and you're suddenly envious of every lucky patient who gets to call Dr. Joel Miller their OB-GYN.

Of course, that feeling dissipates when Dr. Miller is suddenly crowding up the space behind you to rest his massive palms over your hips.

"How 'bout a tour?" he suggests, leaning in close to press his chest into your back and kiss the shell of your ear.

You shiver. "Yes please."

He barely leaves any space between your bodies as he herds you past the receptionist's desk and down a narrow hallway.

"S'my office," he tells you, pinching your side and shrugging towards a locked door to your right.

You nod at it, feigning interest to the best of your ability. "Hm."

Dr. Miller chuckles, clearly unconvinced. "That's not what you wanna see, is it?"

"Mm-mm," you admit, not bothering to argue.

"Thought so," he hums. "C'mon."

He finally unravels himself from behind you to lead the way to another door, your feet carrying you forward after him as arousal begins to cloud every other thought in your mind.

Dr. Miller shoots you a wink and then ushers you into the room marked, Examination.

Your breath hitches the second he turns the lights on.

It's bigger than the exam room at your doctor's office, the bright white walls adorned with framed monuments to Dr. Miller's various academic achievements. Cabinets line the perimeters of the room along with a wide mahogany desk, and at the centre of it all, a sight that makes your pulse pound in your ears.

A single examination table, the end of which is accented by two wide, black stirrups.

You gawk at the setup, an ache spreading between your legs in an instant. A gentle hand on your chin turns your face to the side, and Dr. Miller leans in to press his lips to yours, effectively leaving you breathless even before he pulls away and quietly says,

"Why don't you go ahead and get on the bed for me."

Your heart leaps in your chest, a squeaked sound of obedience getting caught in your throat. Dr. Miller smiles.

You situate yourself in the middle of the bed while Dr. Miller removes his suit jacket and rolls the sleeves of his button-down up to his elbows. You watch, awed and lustful, as he rummages in one of the cabinets, jolting where you sit when you hear the familiar elastic snap of latex hitting skin.

"Now," he says, turning to face you and clapping his gloved hands together. "What'd I say I was gonna do 'fore I left you last time?"

You swallow as he approaches the bed, eyes raking over your bare legs below the hem of your dress.

"You-you said you were gonna show me - "

"All the ways I can make you feel good," he finishes for you. He comes up beside you, placing one gloved palm over your sternum, trailing it downwards between your breasts. "Would you still like that?"

Already dazed, you wordlessly nod up at him with parted lips. 

"Good," he smirks. "Sit up for me."

You straighten your spine and Dr. Miller drops his hand from your chest.

"Arms up," he tells you.

You frown but do as he says.

But then you understand, as he curls his fingers beneath the edge of your dress and lifts it up over your head, letting it fall against the clean tiled floor below.

You're nearly bare now - save for the panties that conceal your already dripping cunt. Dr. Miller hums as he assesses your bare breasts.

"Gorgeous," he murmurs, tilting your chin up to meet his eyes. "How we doin' so far?"

"Good, sir," you smile.

His lips twitch at that, carefully holding your stare as he traces his fingers over your collarbones, down your forearms, across your stomach until finally he ghosts them over your nipples. You gasp, eyebrows knitting together as he circles each pebbled nub with a feather light touch before at last cupping your breasts fully in his massive grasp.

"How's that feel?" he asks as he squeezes down lightly, eliciting a moan from you when he grazes his thumbs over the peaks of your tits, back and forth and back and forth. He's building you up, you realize, taking his time with your body.

"Feels good," you croak, voice already weak as he begins to roll your nipples between his fingers, stealing whatever breath you have left when he dives forward to flick his tongue over each one in turn.

You have to brace your hands on the table to stay upright as he kisses his way upwards then, his moustache dragging over the delicate skin of your chest and neck until his lips find your ear.

"The nipples and breasts are both erogenous zones, but you probably knew that," he hums into the hollow of your ear, his thumbs now working over your nipples in tight little circles, smoothed by the wet of his own saliva. "Do you know the other ones?"

"No," you gasp, or if you do, you can't remember any right now.

Dr. Miller chuckles.

"There's the ears," he hums, proving his point when he bites down gently on your lobe, causing you to gasp before he moves lower.

"Your neck," he continues, pressing his lips into your pulse point and sucking softly at the skin there before continuing his journey down, down, down.

He's focused, utterly intent on you. You, meanwhile, are putty in his hands, loose and pliant when he frees a breast from his grasp to raise one of your arms up over your head and graze his mouth over your underarm.

"Here," he whispers as he does so, slowly lowering your arm to hold you by the hand and trace his gloved thumb in a figure-eight pattern over the thin, oft-neglected skin at your inner wrist. "There."

Oh, fuck.

He catches your head with his other hand when it falls back behind you in response, forcing you to hold his gaze while his fingers scratch affectionately at the nape of your neck. You don't need to him tell you that's also a sensitive spot, you can fucking feel it.

"And right here," he concludes as he brings your hand up to his face and softly kisses your palm, making your head spin when he presses his lips to each of your fingertips before sucking one of the digits into his mouth.

"Oh my god," you whimper, the ache in your core reaching near-unbearable levels. Can you come from this? It feels like you could.

Dr. Miller chuckles, slowly repeating the action with each of your fingers before carefully placing your hand in your lap.

"Now I bet," he murmurs as caresses your cheekbones with the backs of his knuckles. "Those pretty panties of yours are good and soaked for me now, s'that right?"

You don't need to look to know. Sticky-wet and humid between your legs, you know all too well how worked up he's got you.

"Yes - please, Joel, please touch me."

"I am touchin' you, sweetheart," he winks, tugging lightly at your bottom lip with his gloved thumb, watching you in apparent wonder as it springs back into his place when he lets his hand fall.

"Touchin' you everywhere it feels good," he explains.

You groan in frustration but he's not wrong. It feels good everywhere, every touch more intoxicating and deliberate than the last.

He knows exactly what he's doing.

His fingers graze your bare thigh then, goosebumps rising on your skin as he inches patiently towards your waiting heat. He watches your face as he toys with the lace edge of your panties, his warm brown eyes all teasing and expectant.

"This where you want me?" he asks.

"Please." You're shocked it doesn't come out a scream.

You part your legs for him, giving him access to run his palm up your inner thigh before flattening it against your mound. You buck your hips up, moaning in desperation for more and for a moment, Dr. Miller obliges, dragging three fingers over your clothed cunt before retracting them altogether.

You throb at the friction, feel like weeping when it's gone and then Dr. Miller steps back. You reach after him in vain, but he's already rounding the bed, clutching at your ankles and encouraging you to scoot closer.

"Why don't we get these off, huh?" he suggests, fingers already hooking under the edge of your underwear, and this time, you don't wait for him to tell you, just eagerly lift your hips up off the bed and let him slide your panties down your legs.

Your cheeks warm at the way he whistles, his palms resting at the hinges of your knees, eyes trained on your exposed pussy.

"Oh, baby," he coos. "She's fuckin' drippin' for me."

He hardly sounds surprised. Again, you're too far gone to argue, just nod and bite your lip.

"C'mere," he smirks as he begins to carefully maneuver your legs into the stirrups, one at a time. It shouldn't excite you as much as it does, but you don't care. You don't fight him.

There's a beat as he sizes you up, hands gliding up the insides of your thighs, his hungry gaze feasting on your body before settling on your face.

"Relax," he whispers and even though every nerve ending in your body is threatening to explode, you obey. You let your fall back into the table and curl your hands into fists at your sides, ready to take whatever he gives you.

"There you go," Dr. Miller hums, making himself at home between your legs, fanning one gloved hand out over your mound while the other inches towards the apex of your thighs. "You just lie back and let me take care of you. Alright?"

"Mhm."

"Good girl."

You gasp when his fingers at last rake through the seam of your folds, one smooth upwards swipe from your hole to your clit. He spreads your arousal over your lips, sighing at the obscenely wet sound of it beneath his touch.

"You know how many erogenous zones there are here?" he muses as he continues to trace his fingers over your folds, deliberately avoiding your clit.

"Mm-mm," you admit.

"I like to start here," he explains, spreading two fingers over your lips and caressing them softly in slow, rhythmic circles.

You sigh, feeling a fresh wave of slick pool at your centre. Dr. Miller notices.

"Yeah? I know it feels good. Your labia get real sensitive when you're aroused. Lotta folks forget that."

You can barely make out what he's saying, too engrossed by the slow drag of his fingers against your lips, the way he's pinching and tugging lightly at the delicate skin, gauging every one of your responses as he does.

You're going to lose your mind.

"Joel - Dr. Miller, please."

You're whining, squirming under the palm he has on your lower belly.

"Shh," he soothes, now using one gloved finger to draw a line through your seam, dancing it over your entrance. "You're okay."

You will yourself to believe him, but you can't fight the impatient little mewls that continue to spill from you as he begins to circle your hole with the tip of his finger.

"Right here's another one," he tells you, applying more pressure around you opening, tracing the outline of it but never quite pushing in. "Breathe, baby."

You try, exhaling shakily while Dr. Miller repeats the motion with agonizing precision.

"Good," he praises you lowly. "Now, look at me, sweetheart."

You force your eyes open, audibly groaning at the sight of him towering over you between your legs. He holds your gaze as he notches the tip of his finger against your hole and then slowly eases it inside to the first knuckle.

"Oh, fuck," you whine, watching him watching you as he presses his digit deeper, curling it to tickle at your insides until your mouth falls open when he finds what he's looking for.

"Right there," he states plainly. His eyes darken then as he refocuses on your cunt, barely giving you a chance to catch your breath before he's sinking a second finger into you alongside the first.

He nudges at that fucking spot, hard enough to make your head spin, too light to properly take you over the edge. It occurs to you, as he works you up to the precipice of climax with just two patient, tender fingers that Dr. Miller is toying with you. Making a game out of your pleasure, indulging in it.

Something warm and wet twists deep in your core at the thought.

"Oh, Joel," you sob. "Joel, please."

His palm presses harder into your tummy at the same time his fingers beckon with more intent against your g-spot and all at once your vision blurs as some heady sensation takes hold of your lower half. You're going to come. He's barely even started and you're -

"Come on, baby, let go," he encourages you gently, but he's looking at your cunt. "Just like that. Just like that for me."

"Joel!"

It hits like a freight train at the moment the heel of his palm comes down on your clit. And you try to warn him, but you run out of time, your orgasm crashing over you in a white hot blaze. It's dizzying, too warm, too intense, too wet. A deep-seated pressure that had been building in your core erupts and a stream of liquid gushes over Dr. Miller's palm, splashing out on the tiled floor below.

"Oh, there you go," he murmurs gravelly, never ceasing the motions of his fingers inside you or slackening the press of his hand over your mound, coaxing out every drop from you he can.

The high seems to last forever, too spent when it ends to even flinch away from his touch when it begins to feel too much. Dr. Miller doesn't push it though, slowly retracting his fingers from the tight clench of your pussy the second you go slack against the table.

"Good job, darlin'," his voice calls out to you, one massive hand hooking behind your neck to pull you up into a kiss.

"Still with me?" he checks in after a moment.

"Yes," you tell him breathlessly, nodding up at him with hazy eyes. His lips twitch.

"Good. That was one."

"That was - ?"

But he silences you with another kiss, leaving you dizzy as he pulls away to retake his place at the foot of the bed. He takes a long look at your pussy, reverent and adoring, before hinging forward to lick one thick stipe through the wet seam of your folds.

You groan at the contact, still so sensitive, then watch with nervous anticipation as he backs off to loosen his belt buckle, his eyes still fixed on the wet mess between your legs. The front of his shirt is soaked, you notice, his cock visibly hard through the fabric of his trousers.

His cock. You're finally going to see his cock.

He pulls his drenched, latex gloves off and lets them fall to the floor before finally freeing his cock, pants and boxers pooling halfway down his tanned, muscled thighs.

"Oh, god," you whine at the sight of his impressive length, salivating as he strokes himself before you. "So big, Joel."

He grins, pumping himself with one hand while the other moves to rest right above your heat, making you shiver when he strums his thumb gently over your neglected clit.

It occurs to you it's the first time he's touched you there without gloves.

"Yeah? You want it inside you, sweetheart?"

"Please."

He continues stroking your clit, almost absent with it as he drops his hardened cock to reach into a drawer beneath the examination table. You frown until you see the tiny square packet he's retrieved, pinched between his fingers.

"Safety first," he winks as he brings the edge of the packet to his lips and swiftly tears it open with his teeth.

"Very - responsible," you gasp, struggling to get a breath in while he continues to work over your clit, barely batting an eye as he slips the condom on with one hand.

Is there anything he doesn't do with absolute ease?

You whine as he presses closer, notching the head of his cock against your soaking hole while his thumb maintains its tender ministrations on your clit. You can feel him prodding at your entrance, teasing you, applying more pressure with his thumb as it begins to circle.

You arch up off the bed, spreading your legs impossibly wider for him - a silent plea. Heat curls in your tummy, some combination of anticipation and his patient touch bringing you right back to the edge of climax. Slick pools around the head of his cock and only then does he slowly push inside you - just the tip. Still enough to make you cry out, still a stretch, still so much.

Joel, for his part, sighs raggedly, his upper lip curling like he's trying to hold himself back.

"So fuckin' tight, baby," he grits out, his voice still surprisingly even. "Look at you, huh? Fallin' apart for me and I ain't even all the way inside yet."

"Joel, I'm - "

Tension pulls taut in your core, a second climax building rapidly at just the ceaseless motions of his thumb on your clit and Joel's cock sunk barely an inch inside you.

"You can come again, sweetheart, go on," he coaxes you, so sure of himself as you moan and pant and sob until the tension bursts and you're coming again.

"Oh, fuck," Dr. Miller growls, sinking his length deeper into you as your orgasm washes over you, your pussy pulsing around him. Somewhere in the blinding haze of pleasure, you think maybe he'd orchestrated it this way, so you'd be coming undone at the exact moment he buries himself to the hilt in your constricting walls.

Because then he's slowly fucking you, the drag of his cock only making it last longer, a symphony of high-pitched sobs spilling from your throat while Dr. Miller sedulously fucks you through it. You're semi-conscious of the way you're soaking his length, wetness sticking to your inner thighs and gushing between your bodies.

And he's talking, that intoxicating low drawl cutting through the haze as you come back to yourself.

"Fuckin' gorgeous, honey, that's so goddamn good," he growls, and when you blink your eyes open, you see his hands are gripping both your sides now, his gaze once again trained on your cunt, brows furrowed in concentration. "That's what this pretty little pussy needed, huh? Someone to fill her up? God, you're fuckin' - soaking me, baby."

You whimper and he throws his head back with a moan, the first time you've witnessed any crack in his composure.

"Joel...more...please," you croak weakly. You don't care how over-sensitive you are - you want to feel him in your fucking stomach.

"Yeah?" he grunts, his grip on your waist tightening. "Think you can take it?"

Your gazes lock and you nod at him frantically, a somewhat menacing glint burning behind his eyes.

"Yesyeyes, please, Dr. Miller, please."

It seems to affect him, a guttural groan pouring from him as he grants your wishes and increases the pace and power of his thrusts. He doesn't take his eyes off you for a second, searching your face as he experimentally swirls his hips and hits somewhere deeper, somewhere that makes your fucking toes curl.

"Oh, fuck!" you cry when he hits it again on his next thrust. He notes the response, naturally.

"Fuck," he groans, suddenly stilling, buried deep in your walls. You all but scream in protest. "Where? Tell me where it feels good."

He pushes into that spot, like he's looking for confirmation, the drag of his cock teasing at the spongy, sensitive trigger deep inside you.

"There, there, please, right there!"

It's damn-near frantic, your fingers reaching between your bodies to claw listlessly at his chest. Dr. Miller, intent and controlled as ever, snaps his hips forward then, his face cracking into a grin at the primal groan it elicits from you.

"There?" he hums like he doesn't already know.

"Yes!" you tell him anyway, your voice cutting off into a broken sob as his thrusts pick up again, his cock now hitting right where you need it most on every precise stroke.

The back of your head hits the bed again while Dr. Miller's hands creep up your tummy to cup your breasts in his massive palms. You're floating, you think, caught somewhere between your last climax and your inevitable next one, stimulated past the point of words when his thumbs begin to dance over your nipples again.

"You're gonna give another one, baby, alright?" you hear him tell you. "You're gonna give me one more."

You can't find the will to respond beyond a hapless whimper that almost sounds like please, heat licking at your insides for the third time tonight. Then Dr. Miller is falling forward over you, caging you in under his broad chest as his lips meet your ear.

"Let go," he whispers, his low drawl mingling with the wet sounds of his cock sliding in and out of you and the obscene smack of skin on skin. "Let go for me now. Come all over my cock, baby. I'm right here. I'm gonna take care of ya."

You choke out a strangled noise as he tweaks your nipples between his fingers at the same time his teeth close over your earlobe and then you're gone.

Stars burst behind your eyes as you gush around his girth - have you ever squirted this much in your life? Bubbling warmth seeps from your core and up your spine, overtaking everything else till you're just a shaking mess beneath him, gooey and spent.

You can hear him talking you through it - Oh, good job, baby, that's so fuckin' good - but all you can offer him in response is a syrupy refrain of, thank you thank you thank you.

He pulls back, giving you space to breathe. You stare up at him bleary-eyed, dazedly entranced as he brings a hand up to your face to tenderly cup your cheek, so jarringly soft considering the way he's still mercilessly fucking you.

"So pretty like this, baby," he coos, his thumb tracing your lower lip softly. "This perfect fuckin' pussy. Takin' this cock so well. S'what you needed, huh?"

You can only nod tiredly, humming a quiet sound of agreement as Dr. Miller's face suddenly screws up, his chest heaving above you. As much as you don't want it to end, you have to admit you're eager to watch him fall apart. To know what Dr. Miller looks like when he comes.

Your eyes flutter closed as you daringly suck his thumb between your lips and suck, tasting salt and latex and Joel.

"Holy shit," he groans, his thrusts coming faster, relentless, as he chases his high. "M'gonna fuckin' come, baby. You want me to come inside this tight little cunt?"

You'd love for him to do just that for real - but the illusion is more than enough for now. Your eyes snap open and find his at once, something wild and desperate swimming in his familiar browns.

"God, yes, please - please, Dr. Miller, please come for me."

Your slurred pleas are cut off when Dr. Miller lets out a raucous groan.

Then you're both moaning in unison as his jaw slackens and his hips stutter, his cock spasming deep inside you as he spills into the condom. He's vocal as his orgasm rips through him, his entire body shaking with the force of it. Fucking beautiful.

"Jesus - Christ - " he huffs between two final thrusts, crashing forward with his cock still buried in your cunt to lick into your open mouth. It's all panted breaths and tongues and gratitude, contented little tears spilling from your eyes before you can stop them.

"Hey, hey," he whispers when he notices, brushing the wetness away and tucking your dampened hair off your face. "Shh, you're okay. How we doin'?"

Always checking in. The fog of ecstasy lifts a bit, as you wrap your arms around his neck and shake your head with a breathy laugh.

"That was - "

But Dr. Miller cuts you off with another kiss, catching your gasp when he slowly pulls his cock free from your wasted hole.

"I know," he smirks. One more chaste press of his lips against yours and then he's hoisting himself off of you, carefully helping your legs out of the stirrups before tending to himself. Dr. Miller removes the condom - full with a deliciously heavy load, you note - and hides it in one of his discarded medical gloves, tying the end into a tight knot before tossing the evidence of your evening in the trash.

Your hips ache, burning dully from being splayed open for so long, all the more noticeable now as you finally bring your knees together.

When Dr. Miller turns back to you, he's already tucked himself back into his trousers, a sight that makes you feel a bit small, shrinking in on yourself, still so naked and exposed before him.

But Dr. Miller is smiling, and that puts you at ease. "Lie back," he says.

Your brows furrow till you note what he's holding in his hand, your eyes widening briefly before you cautiously obey.

You shudder as he cleans you up, wiping away sticky wet slick and come from your thighs and your folds. He's gentle and careful with it - just like he is with everything else - and when he's done, he bends forward to kiss your knees, finally extending a helpful hand out to you to help you sit up.

With your legs dangling off the edge of the table, you both glance downward at the splashes of wet that mark his tiled floors.

"Made such a pretty little mess, sweetheart," he remarks with an affectionate smile.

"You knew I would."

Shrugging innocently, he chuckles. "Arms up," he says for the second time this evening.

"I think you were holding back before," you tease him, unflinchingly lifting your arms up over your head to let him slip your dress back on over your shoulders, warming at the way he smooths out the sleeves and fans the skirt across your thighs.

You both ignore your ruined panties still strewn on the floor.

"Well," he smirks as he finishes, cupping the sides of your face in his massive grasp. "I was a guest. Woulda been rude of me to leave someone else's office in this kinda state."

"And what about your office?" you laugh as he helps you down off the table with a strong, steadying arm.

"I'll call the cleaners," he winks.

You let him guide you to the door on shaky legs, confusion setting in when he leads you into the hallway just to stand in the threshold.

"Bathroom's next door," he explains. Of course Dr. Joel Miller is going to make sure you pee after sex. "I'll just be a minute in here. Then f'you still wanna come back to my place - "

"Yes, please," you interrupt eagerly and his lips curl into that sweet half-smile.

Maybe he'll let you make a mess there too.

#joel miller x reader #joel miller x f!reader #joel miller smut #gyno!joel #medical tw #joel miller one shot #joel miller fanfiction #joel miller fanfic #joel miller au

[sansaorgana]

— THROWN TO THE WOLVES (IX)

PART ONE || PART TWO || PART THREE PART FOUR || PART FIVE || PART SIX PART SEVEN || PART EIGHT || PART TEN

PAIRING — Na-Baron Feyd-Rautha Harkonnen x fem!Reader // Atreides!OC

SUMMARY — Feyd-Rautha focuses on bringing back the spice production to full efficency while his wife plots against The Baron. The ghosts of her past are haunting her in the Arrakeen Palace where her family lived and died.

AUTHOR’S NOTE — It’s written as an usual x Reader fic without describing anything about the Reader’s looks but I still classified it as an OC as well since she is Paul Atreides’ half-sister. This chapter is quite long so I think the next one will be the last...? Of course I am open to write some additional chapters with these characters in the future 👀 Thank you everyone supporting my work 🙏🏻😭 I don't know when I'll post the next / last chapter. Next week I hope but it might take me more time than usual because I have to catch up with uni work finally lol

WARNINGS — arranged marriage, mentions of sexual activities (no actual smut), violent behaviour, death

WORD COUNT — 8,170

ENGLISH IS MY SECOND LANGUAGE.

THROWN TO THE WOLVES (IX)

Feyd-Rautha was barely able to hide his excitement on that day. Becoming the Governor of Arrakis was a huge deal – not only it proved that he was his uncle’s worthy successor if he was given such responsibility, but also Arrakis remained the most important planet under the Harkonnen rule due to the spice resources. Controlling this planet was like controlling the universe.

Before the official ceremony would begin, he had to deal with the formalities, all dressed up in the accurate black leather attire and pride on his face. Then his wife entered the throne room accompanied by the guards and from that moment he could only focus on her.

Her black leather dress’ design was mimicking his uniform’s one and her face was hidden by the veil made of chains and gemstones. She walked past him and bowed down in front of his uncle. Feyd knew that was the custom but it still made him clench his jaw and blood boil.

She straightened herself and fixed her dress on her abdomen as it was getting too tight in that area. Feyd smirked at the sight of her womb getting visibly swollen with his child. With his heir.

His wife signed the contract about him becoming the new Governor of Arrakis as the Atreides signet ring sparkled on her pinky finger. The truth was, her signature was not required there at all but the Baron loved to humiliate her in this way. However, she managed to do it with such dignity. Feyd wondered if she still felt like an Atreides. That signet ring wasn’t leaving her pinky finger at all ever since it had been adjusted to her size.

He wondered if it was a symbol of power for her or did she keep it for sentimental reasons.

Sentiment. That word was new in Feyd-Rautha’s dictionary. But now, when he watched his wife standing behind him with her hands clasped on her womb, he swore he could feel it.

He couldn’t explain most of the things happening inside his body at the sight of her. It was more than plain desire or sexual attraction. In fact, he had had lovers more adventurous than her and surely more experienced. But he had never met a woman like that.

She made him think of his mother, especially now, when she was expecting his child. He wondered what kind of mother she would be. Would she… love… his son? Or would he be another pawn in her court games…?

His mother was cold and distant but only recently Feyd had realised it was no reason to kill her. Was it possible that some part of him regretted it? His uncle had manipulated him into doing something he couldn’t truly understand back in the day – an act impossible to undo and sealing his murderous fate.

But even his mother had never touched him so gently like his wife. And he knew that it was weak to crave that but he did – he craved more from her and her only. He would kill anyone looking at her the wrong way but she could disrespect him in any way and he’d still be on his knees for her. He had never been as obedient to his uncle. He had feared him as a little boy and then he had hated him, waiting for his turn on the Harkonnen throne. The obedience to his wife was dictated by admiration and… sentiment.

Yes, that was a new word in his dictionary.

And his harpies… Well, he had been attached to them but killing them had felt cold – he hadn't even felt sorry.

The room slowly filled with people who were to witness his nomination for the Governor of Arrakis. Feyd stood proudly and already imagined the day he would be nominated The Baron Harkonnen.

And when his uncle officially named him the Governor, Feyd grabbed his face and brought it down for an angry kiss that was a mockery of gratitude. In that kiss there was a promise of the upcoming succession of the much more important title. In that kiss there was the Harkonnen poison and everyone cheered but the Baron knew.

He knew.

You were laying on your bed on the ship inside your cabin and playing with the Atreides signet ring on your pinky finger. It felt surreal to realise that under different circumstances you would had made the same journey a few months earlier with your family when your father had been gifted Arrakis.

Your stream of thoughts was interrupted abruptly by Feyd walking inside the cabin.

“Apparently, Rabban has no idea we are coming,” he announced with a smirk and sat on the bed next to you, waiting for your approval like a little boy after telling his mother exciting news.

“Why do you hate him so?” You only asked and his smirk dropped in an instant. “Is he not your brother?”

“Do you love yours?” Feyd tilted his head a little as he watched you carefully.

“It doesn’t matter anymore,” you smiled sadly at him and caressed your bump. “He is dead and so is his older sister. But in that relationship, I was Rabban and Paul was you.”

“I am better than Rabban. He means nothing,” Feyd shrugged his arms, visibly annoyed at the fact that you scolded him and started asking questions instead of sharing his excitement.

“Do you think you will catch a tan on Arrakis?” You changed the subject and chuckled at the confused glance he gave you.

“I’m not going there for vacation,” he moved closer to you on the bed and placed his hand on your womb. You felt its warmth spreading all over your body. “And neither are you,” he reminded you.

“I know.”

“The medic says that the Arrakis might do you good. The sun and all,” Feyd explained, a bit awkwardly.

“Yes, I know. But it is also not a very pleasant environment. It is hot and dry,” you sighed. “And full of spice.”

“You will have everything you want and need there, my Baroness,” Feyd leaned in to suck on your neck – his idea of a romantic kiss. You leaned back and sighed at the pleasure.

“How big do you think he is now?” You caressed your husband’s hand gently and he moved away from the crook of your neck to look into your eyes. “Our son. Do you think he is still smaller than your hand?” You bit on your lower lip. “I like to imagine him so little that your hand covers him whole when you place it on my womb.”

“Do you think of him often?” Feyd asked and you furrowed your brows at his question.

“Of our son?” You wanted to make sure and he nodded. “All the time,” you answered with all honesty. “And you…?” You asked, carefully.

“All the time,” Feyd nodded and looked down at his hand caressing your bump.

“And what do you think?” You were scared to know the answer but you needed to know it.

“I’m proud to have a son. He will be the Baron one day and I will train his body to become even stronger than mine. And you will train his mind to be sharp like yours,” Feyd looked at you. He was serious but you chuckled at that as you caressed his cheek with your thumb.

“Just promise me that you won’t do to him what has been done to you,” you whispered as the smile disappeared from your face. “Please,” you pleaded.

“It has to be done,” was all he said as his jaw clenched.

“No, it doesn’t,” you shook your head. You could feel the tears forming in your eyes. Thinking of what your husband had gone through was painful enough but imagining your son going through the same thing was even worse.

“How else do you want him to be a great warrior?” Feyd laughed at you. “He will need discipline.”

“Discipline does not have to mean abuse. I want him to follow your steps out of admiration and respect. Do you want your own son to feel the same way towards you that you feel towards your uncle?” You raised an eyebrow at him. “Do you want your son to plot how to get rid of you? To wait impatiently for you to finally die and rot?”

“No, I do not,” he admitted after a short while of hesitation.

“Then we will do it my way,” you stated.

“I don’t want my children to be weaklings,” Feyd drawled as his hand squeezed your womb possessively.

“Neither do I,” you assured him. “And it insults me greatly that you think that I would raise them to be weak. I hate weakness,” you gave him a stern look.

“There’s your answer why I hate my brother,” he said and moved down to lay his head on your womb. You carefully caressed his temples in a soothing manner.

You still had to play little games with him sometimes, you assumed it would always be like this one way or another. But you loved him. Yes, you loved him.

Princess Atreides would rather die than admit that. For the Harkonnen na-baroness it was difficult to admit her feelings, too. But you didn’t mind giving up and finally allowing yourself to confess the truth. It was making you feel less lonely in the world. Perhaps it was love dictated by the fact you had no one else around. Perhaps you loved the way he worshipped you. Perhaps you loved him for the way he was making you feel so powerful and important. But at the end of the day, it was love. Not that you planned to say it out loud.

It was true that you hated weakness but Feyd-Rautha was yours. If he was to die, you’d die, too. You had no home to go to, no family member to turn to. All you had was him. Him and the dream of the life you two were supposed to live one day.

You knew that the black colour was a bad choice for the planet like Arrakis. But you couldn’t imagine wearing anything else. As a Harkonnen you had to establish dominance in your House’s way. Your arrival dress had to be black and made of a flowy material with a semi-transparent veil to protect your skin from the hot rays of sunshine and the wind full of harsh sand and spice.

The very first step you took outside the ship nearly made you dizzy. It felt so odd after so many months to feel the sunlight on your skin and to see the colours while not being inside any building – even if the colours of Arrakis were not many.

“My Lady,” Astra and Cara followed you outside, both widening their big, black Harkonnen eyes at the sight of the desert, “are you alright?”

“Yes, my girls, I am,” you held their hands.

“Let’s go inside, na-baroness,” the medic joined you. “At this time of the day it is recommended not to go out,” he explained and you nodded before following him with your girls, guards and all the servants carrying your things. Feyd was already inside the palace with his uncle and dealing with an embarrassed and humiliated Rabban.

You looked up through your veil and examined the sight of the building in front of you. It was not much cosier than the Harkonnen fortress on Giedi Prime. On the inside the design was raw as well, but some part of you was already used to such an environment.

“My Lady,” one of the servants approached you. He had already been living there for quite some time now as he had come to Arrakis with Count Rabban. “Shall we prepare the rooms for you and na-baron or will you take the room that belonged to the previous Duke? Count Rabban did not take it, therefore we left it untouched,” he informed you and you froze for a second.

“My father’s room? It is left untouched?” You gasped.

“Yes, my Lady na-baroness, Duchess Atreides,” the man was bowing down so low you became concerned about his spine.

“Enough of the titles, take me there,” you ordered and then you turned around at your servants. “Wait here. I will let you know what room I am taking.”

“My Lady,” they all nodded as you followed the man alone. You didn’t want even Astra and Cara around you because you couldn’t tell what your reaction to your father’s chambers would be.

“Behind that door, na-baroness,” the servant bowed down and pointed at the doors. You pushed them and let them close behind you as your body trembled at the sight. You lifted the veil off of your face and looked around.

The room was arranged in a similar way as your father’s chamber back on Caladan. Duke Leto hated any form of mess and he had everything always put in its place. You wandered around and touched all the personal belongings – his chair, his desk… You froze at the sight of the pictures he had there. One picture was of him and Lady Jessica, the other one was of you and Paul. There was even a tiny picture from his wedding day with your mother. You remembered that picture very well as you had once asked him about it. He had told you he kept it out of respect for her and for you.

You had no idea he would still keep it even if you weren’t around.

You opened the desk. Someone had been rummaging inside – most likely to take the jewellery and the important documents. But the personal letters stayed. Personal letters and… a small doll.

You had given it to him at the age of four and asked him to take care of it. You didn’t expect he had been keeping it all these years.

“Oh, father…” you whispered and brought the doll close to your heart. “One day, it will be my daughter’s,” you decided and were about to walk away from the desk when you spotted an unfinished letter.

Carefully and curiously, you picked the paper up and read the few sentences that he had written down before taking a break and never being able to go back to it again.

Dear Daughter, I am aware of the anger and all the resentment you must be holding in your heart towards me. I am not asking for much but please, write back to us. If not for me, then do it for Paul. We both miss you dearly and we are worried when you are not answering our letters personally. All we want to know is if you are safe and…

Your eyes widened and your heart skipped a beat. So, they had been writing to you. All this time... And only Baron Harkonnen knew how many letters had been kept away from you. Of course he had lied to you. How could you be so stupid…?

You clenched your fist and then threw the crumpled paper back into the drawer. It didn’t change anything now. It brought you some peace, deep down, but it didn’t mean anything anymore. It wouldn't take back time.

You approached your father’s bed and spotted a robe laying there, discarded. He would wear that over his nightwear when he was leaving the room in the middle of the night due to an emergency. You assumed that the Harkonnen invasion was an emergency so sudden and violent that he had no time to put it on.

The robe was silk and dark green with the Atreides emblem on the chest. You sat on the edge of the bed and put the doll down on your lap before taking the robe in your hands and squeezing it as you brought it to your face. It still faintly smelled like him. It smelled like your father.

You buried your face in the silk and closed your eyes, remembering his embrace. For a short while it was almost as if he was still there, holding you and telling you it would be alright.

But it wasn’t alright. It hadn’t been alright and his daughter had died. You couldn’t tell when it happened exactly. Had Princess Atreides die in that cell on the night before her wedding? Or when she had been locked up after the Baron had told her about going to Arrakis and killing her family? Or maybe she had died somewhere in the meantime. Perhaps when she had seen Feyd taking an innocent life for the first time. It was really hard to tell but she was definitely gone now.

You startled at the sound of someone entering the room without knocking. It was Feyd – no one else would dare to do that.

“I’ve been looking for you,” he said and froze at the sight of you holding your father’s robe. “Are you alright?”

“Yes,” you stood up and threw the robe on the floor as you picked the doll up. “Burn it,” you ordered. “And we’ll take a different room. They can clean up this one,” you approached him and handed him the doll in your hands. He took it, confused.

“What is this?” He asked.

“Our next child will be a daughter and you will give it to her when she is born,” you told him sternly.

He snorted at first but then he realised that you had been dead serious. The doll held lots of significance and meaning to you and he didn’t even have any idea how much you trusted him with it.

Feyd nodded his head after a long while and he looked down at the doll, awkwardly holding her in his pale hands.

“My Lady, what is your decision?” The servant knocked upon the door and joined you.

“I don’t want this room, clean it up,” you told him.

“Do you want a room next to your husband’s, na-baroness?” He asked.

“No, we will share one room,” you told him and he bowed down before leaving you quietly. “Unless you want your own,” you laid your eyes on Feyd.

“I want what you want.”

You were walking through the endless desert. It was like the oceans back on Caladan but instead of the water there was sand. The heat did not bother you and you did not feel tired at all. However, all this walking seemed pointless. You didn’t know where you were or where to go.

And then you spotted someone on the horizon. A tiny figure in a stillsuit and your heart skipped a beat. Was it one of the Fremen? You didn’t want to find out but your legs kept walking anyway as if you had no control over your body.

The figure remained motionless. After a while you spotted it was a man. You wondered why he was not reacting at all, seeing you walking towards him. Perhaps he was waiting for you. But why?

When you were close enough to see his face, you gasped. It was your brother, Paul Atreides, with his eyes blue from the spice, wearing a Fremen armour and he seemed to stare in the distance. Now you realised that he couldn’t see you even though you were facing him.

“Paul?” You asked as your body stopped walking with your face inches away from his. “Brother?”

He startled a little and furrowed his brows. Did he hear you…?

“Paul,” you said again and his eyes found yours.

“Sister,” his voice was different now. It was rough and held no affection. It made your blood run cold.

“What are we doing here?” You asked sadly. “Let’s go back home.”

“What is home now?”

“Caladan,” you explained.

“We cannot.”

You woke up abruptly and sat up, breathing heavily as you felt the sweat running down your spine and forehead. You had never experienced a dream so vivid and realistic as this one.

You assumed it was because of Arrakis. The heat could cause such a vision or perhaps it was all that buried deep down grief after losing your family. Being here now, in that palace where they had lived and died, it was making you feel odd.

Feyd woke up as well and you heard him reaching out for the knife underneath his pillow.

“It’s alright,” you told him. “I’ve just had a bad dream.”

“It’s your first night on Arrakis. Maybe it’s the spice messing with your head,” you felt his hand rubbing your back. “Lay down, come to me,” he whispered and you did.

You laid your head on his chest and hugged him tight like a scared child. Your heart was pounding and you felt dizzy. But you didn’t want to tell your husband what the dream was. He didn’t ask anyway.

On the next day you were gathered in a conference room. Everyone was there, the Baron and Count Rabban, too. You hoped that they would go back to Giedi Prime but it seemed like they wanted to stay and ensure that the spice production would go back to normal. You tried not to make a face at that as you watched the hologram globe of Arrakis in front of you on display.

“Shouldn’t the Fremen delegation greet the new Governor of Arrakis?” You asked.

“The Fremen do not have negotiations with us anymore. We are in the state of war, na-baroness,” one of the engineers answered you with a nod of his head.

“Let it be war, then,” you nodded back.

“What is causing the biggest problems?” Your husband asked as he gave his brother a contemptuous look. “Apart from the bad governing of the resources.”

“The Fremen have a new leader, a mysterious Muad’Dib,” The Baron explained and for some reason a shiver went down your spine at the mention of the name. You didn’t know why because it didn’t sound sinister or dangerous.

“And what about him?” Feyd asked. You could hear he was bored of the meeting and wanted real action as soon as possible.

“They are destroying our machinery and killing our soldiers, slowing down the production. He is unstoppable. Like a shadow,” Rabban explained and Feyd snorted at him.

“My big scary brother failed to deal with one Fremen savage,” he drawled. “Instead of slaughtering them all.”

“And what would our Baroness do?” The Baron interrupted Feyd and stared at you with a smirk. Suddenly, the whole room laid their eyes on you and you blinked a few times, surprised.

“Why would you ask a woman that?” Rabban inquired and Feyd hissed at him for that remark.

“Because I want to know her insight. Our Baroness happens to have interesting ideas,” Baron teased, his squinted eyes never leaving yours.

“I would oppose slaughtering the Fremen,” you stated.

“I’ve told you, she’s just a woman,” Rabban laughed.

“She is the Governess of Arrakis and your na-baroness and you will respect her,” Feyd barked.

“Enough!” You banged the fist on the table and the sound echoed through the chamber full of the Harkonnen servants and engineers widening their eyes at you. “Both of you!” You snapped. “Acting like children,” you scolded. “I am not the Governess of Arrakis, Feyd,” you laid your eyes on him and he looked a bit taken aback by your outburst. “That title does not work that way. You’re the Governor and I am your wife. However,” you looked at the Baron again. He was smirking all that time. “I do not think slaughtering them will bring us profit. They know the desert and the spice more than we do. We need them as obedient allies. But in order to have them as allies, we have to defeat them and their will to fight. We need to hit them with aggression that they have not yet seen nor experienced in their worst nightmares,” you raised your chin up.

“And that aggression is Feyd-Rautha,” Baron nodded at your husband.

“If we have negotiations with the Fremen in the future, I’d like to be there,” you announced and Rabban snorted. You knew that he did not mean these things personally, he was just frustrated that he was being replaced by his brother and seeing that an off-world woman was holding more influence than him had to be rough for his ego.

“What’s so funny, brother?” Feyd asked him and you rolled your eyes. They were at it again. “The only thing I find funny is how my wife has more brains than you.”

“And why is that funny?” You asked him, irritated.

“That is enough indeed,” Baron raised his hand. “We all have better things to do,” he announced and everyone bowed their heads as he left the room.

You watched your husband and his brother leaving right behind him, still having an argument like little children. Then you took a deep breath in and stood up to go back to Astra and Cara.

However, when you left the room, Feyd grabbed his brother’s neck and pushed him down on the floor. He basically threw him at your feet and you were surprised that he had managed it so easily since Rabban was a big and strong man.

“You will kiss her shoe and show your na-baroness respect,” Feyd ordered, “as you beg for her forgiveness.”

You looked down as Rabban looked up, scared. As much as it brought you some satisfaction to have a big, strong Harkonnen count who was called Beast Rabban at your feet, you felt sorry for him, too. 

“Feyd, there is no need,” you looked at your husband.

“No, there is, because I say so,” he insisted and kicked his brother’s head. “He will kiss your shoe or die.”

“I said, there is no need,” you repeated, more sternly this time. “Your brother is not my enemy like he is not yours either,” you pointed out. “Stand up, Count Rabban,” you ordered the man.

Carefully and hesitantly he moved up, trying to avoid looking into your eyes.

“You shall remember the kindness I have given you,” you told him and he nodded. “Now, leave.”

You watched him walk away as fast as possible and then you looked at your husband. He wasn’t pleased but he was trying to hide it. You could tell when he was angry very easily from his facial expressions by now.

“Do not torment him. He might be useful,” you told him.

“He will do anything to keep his pathetic head on. He’s got no honour,” Feyd snorted at that. “He would kiss anyone’s shoe if his life depended on it.”

“Then he is more like me than I have expected,” you only said and walked past him, leaving him behind, surprised.

“You are not like him,” Feyd followed you as he grabbed your wrist. “You have honour.”

“Do I?” You chuckled and turned around to face him. “I did everything to survive. It had nothing to do with honour. I became a Harkonnen instead of doing what my Atreides pride was telling me to do and that was to kill myself before letting any of you hurt me or change me.”

“It is different,” he was trying to deny your words. You were confusing him now.

“You also do not have honour, Feyd-Rautha. The way you used to fight drugged warriors in the arena. It has nothing to do with honour,” you reminded him as his jaw clenched. “And you know what? I don’t care,” you shrugged your arms. “My father, he was an honourable man. And look where it has gotten him. We are too cunning for honour.”

“We?” Feyd asked.

“The Harkonnens,” you explained and cupped his face to pull his head down and place a kiss upon his forehead. “Now, go, weren’t you supposed to terrorise the poor Fremen?”

He smirked at you and leaned in to place a hungry kiss upon your lips as his hand caressed your womb.

“Be careful, my darling, come back to me in one piece from the treacherous desert,” you bid him farewell and kissed him one last time before going back to your chambers.

Weeks had passed and the mysterious Muad’Dib remained uncaught, however the spice production came back to full efficiency. It was difficult to celebrate such victory, though, because you weren’t even sure if it was because of Feyd-Rautha being a good Governor or was it because of his uncle who still was present on Arrakis. Both him and Rabban. You wondered how things had been back on Giedi Prime – especially now, when all the important Harkonnens were on Arrakis.

You had your girls and your medic and much less nosy guards following you everywhere. The Arrakeen Palace was giving you lots of freedom and safety but it was also a much more boring place than the fortress on Giedi Prime. It was full of ghosts, too – you couldn’t stop thinking your family had been slayed in that very place.

You kept dreaming of Paul each and every night. It was making you feel weary and frustrated at this point. You didn’t want Feyd to know so you often would leave the bed quietly in the middle of the night and walk outside to sit on the balcony. There was something fascinating about the desert; it was so calm yet dangerous. By day it was too hot to just stare and admire but at night it was peaceful and with no one around to bother you.

Tonight you were standing and admiring the moon in your nightgown, with your hand caressing your swollen womb. It was getting bigger and bigger each day and you could feel the child move now. The medic assured you he was placed properly and growing healthy. You wondered if your son would be born on Arrakis.

“What’s wrong?” Feyd’s voice made you turn around. He was standing by the entrance to the balcony and staring at you.

“I can’t sleep,” you lied. You could but you didn’t want to. You didn’t want to dream of Paul.

“Again?” Feyd sighed and approached you. He stood behind you and leaned your body on his chest. It made you sigh out of relief and he placed his hands on your abdomen. “Perhaps the spice is doing you harm.”

“No, the medic would have noticed that,” you shook your head. “Perhaps it’s your son keeping me awake,” you made up a believable excuse and Feyd chuckled.

“And what are you doing here? Staring at the sand?”

“I don’t expect you to understand the beauty of the desert,” you teased. “But yes, the sand, the moon, everything.”

“When I will become the Baron, we will have a little tour and visit every planet under Harkonnen rule,” he whispered into your ear. “You will see many beautiful things, my darling pet.”

“And when will that be?” You snapped, frustrated. “In ten years? A hundred?” You snorted.

“What are you talking about?” Feyd took a step back and leaned on the railing to take a better look at your face but you remained staring in the distance.

“What is he still doing here? I thought Arrakis was ours. Yet, he is here and it feels as if we are being supervised. Meanwhile, Giedi Prime remains without protection,” you drawled through gritted teeth.

“If you were him, would you leave us two to each other?” Feyd asked.

“Are you by his side again?” You finally looked at him, angrily. “He gave you the planet to govern and you’re defending him again?”

“I am not defending him,” Feyd got angry, too, at your words. “But it is obvious why he stayed here. He knows we might be plotting. He needs to keep an eye on things.”

“I have already plotted,” you lowered your voice and went back to staring at the moon.

Feyd kept looking at you in silence for a while before he finally spoke up again.

“And what is that?”

“He shall be slayed by night alongside most of the guards and servants. We will say it was a nighttime assassination attack by Muad’Dib and his people. They targeted the Harkonnen nobility and you were too busy saving your pregnant wife to help your uncle,” you whispered.

“Everyone will know the truth, it's too obvious,” Feyd told you. “It's only giving us an alibi for those who want to believe in it.”

“Of course they will suspect what really happened but they will not care. You showed them your worth in the arena and you brought back the full efficiency of the spice production. The Harkonnen lords will give you a chance. I am sure they’ve already grown tired and weary of the Baron,” you kept convincing him.

“What if Muad’Dib suddenly decides to show up and deny?”

You sighed and looked at him again, furiously.

“Just admit that you don’t want him dead, because in some way I cannot understand… you love him,” you hissed at him.

“Love?” It was the first time you heard him use that word and it brought a chill down your spine. It sounded so off and scary when your husband said it out loud. “I don’t know what that pathetic feeling is,” he assured you.

“I can see that,” you raised an eyebrow at him and walked away to leave the balcony and go back to your bedroom.

You were hurt, angry and frustrated and it was starting to bring tears to your eyes but you didn’t want him to see that.

Your husband followed you to the bedroom. In the way his footsteps were even heavier than usual, you spotted his annoyance as well.

“What do you expect of me? You’re so impatient, woman,” he started once the doors closed behind him. “You want everything and you want it now. I said I’d do it, I swore I’d do it but you admitted yourself we have to wait longer. If he dies here at night, do you think the noble lords of Giedi Prime will accept that so easily?”

“Then slay the ones who refuse to accept you as the successor!” You turned around with the rage making your blood boil. “Slay everyone standing in our way, as you promised. Do you want our son to be born in a world that he is manipulating for his own gain? Do you want to be his dog following the orders for the next few years? I am tired of playing the games with him on his own chess board. I want to make my own game, my own rules, my own board!” You tried to keep your voice down in case someone would spy on you but it was difficult with all that anger pouring out of you.

In one swift move, Feyd grabbed your chin and squeezed your cheeks as he brought your face so close to his that your noses were rubbing each other. There was so much anger in his eyes that the old you would start trembling out of fear for her life but the new you didn’t even flinch.

“Keep your voice down, we will do it,” he spat out.

“No,” you mumbled. “You will do it. You’re the hand that slays,” you reminded him and he kissed you so hungrily that you became breathless.

“I still want to kill you sometimes,” he confessed between one kiss and another as he led you back to your bed and laid you down on the mattress. “Choke you, slit your pretty little throat, watch you squirm under me as you bleed to death.”

“Whatever turns you on, my darling,” you chuckled at him as he looked at you sternly.

“If I hurt you, I’d kill myself right after. I’m bound to you forever,” he confessed and you smiled gently.

You didn’t want to tease him that after all, he did know what love was. After all, he did feel it. But you knew that he’d hate being confronted with the truth.

“If something happened to you, I would want to die alongside you, too,” you told him. “You’re the only one I have and none of my ambitions matter without you by my side.”

It was true. You didn't want to rule alone. In fact, you didn't want to ever feel lonely in your life again.

You were sitting next to Paul and watching the sunset in silence. In your dreams you would always meet him in the desert. Nothing else seemed to exist on Arrakis in the dreamworld – except for you and him.

“Why do you haunt me?” You asked and laid your eyes on his angry face. He was always so angry these days.

You hated Paul from your dreams. He was different. There was no kindness and gentleness about him anymore. If you were supposed to be haunted by his ghost, you’d rather be haunted by the brother you had remembered instead.

“I am not here for you,” Paul snorted and you furrowed your brows. Then he looked down at your swollen womb and you instinctively protected it with your hands.

“What do you mean?” You gasped.

“The spawn inside you shares my blood on both sides,” he answered mysteriously, which confused you greatly but you decided not to give it a second thought. After all, it was just a dream. “No, it is not,” Paul smirked viciously at you, as if he was able to read your thoughts.

“Get up,” you heard Feyd’s rough voice as his hand shook your arm. You woke up abruptly and sat up, trying to calm yourself after the dream.

“What’s going on?” You asked and looked around the dark room.

“Come with me,” your husband looked very pleased with himself as he pulled you out of the bed.

“What are you–”

“Shh,” he put his finger over his mouth as he led you outside.

You gasped at the sight of the bodies scattered all over the corridor of the palace. Servants and guards with their throats slit, laying in poodles of their own blood.

“Have you done that?” You asked quietly and Feyd nodded. “My girls…” you gasped.

“I haven’t touched your pets,” he assured you and stopped in front of the doors leading to the Baron’s chambers.

“Have you killed him…?” You were both excited and terrified of the outcome if the answer was yes. But, most importantly, you were in shock.

“Not yet,” Feyd answered as he pushed the doors open in front of you.

Not sure what his words meant, you entered the chamber carefully and spotted the Baron on his bed, letting out loud and raspy breaths. His life support machinery was no longer attached to him; you assumed Feyd had decided to give him a slow death.

You looked at your husband and spotted a sadistic sparkle in his eye as he was visibly enjoying the sounds and the view. He put his arm around you and walked you closer to the Baron’s bed.

That old and sick man looked pathetic at that moment and for a short while you even felt sorry for him. His eyes widened even further at the sight of you as he raised one of his hands towards you but you took a step back.

You didn’t know what to expect of him on his deathbed. Some part of you craved for him to admit his defeat and name you a worthy successor of the Harkonnen throne. Some other part of you expected him to curse you and your whole bloodline, which would be quite justified.

However, you certainly did not expect the sheer desperation and debasement.

“P-please…” He could barely speak. “Please, help me,” he tried to reach out for you.

You didn’t feel sorry for him anymore. You felt disgusted.

“You’re a weakling,” you smirked at him. “You called my father weak but I am sure that he did not beg like a dog on his deathbed. I am sure he died with dignity.”

“Please, help me…” He coughed out. “Help me and I will make your son an Emperor…”

“I do not need you to make my son an Emperor,” you laughed with contempt. “I am to become The Baroness Harkonnen; commanding the largest army and possessing the biggest wealth in the galaxy.”

“F-Feyd, I was like a father to you…” He searched for his nephew’s cruel eyes now, giving up on asking for your compassion and pity. “My boy…”

“Like a father, you say,” Feyd drawled. “I couldn’t wait to kill you for so many years now.”

“Please…”

“Oh, shut him up, how long will it take for him to die?” You sighed with an eye-roll as Feyd nodded his head at you and grabbed the short knife attached to his hip.

“Farewell, dear uncle,” he smiled smugly as he slit the Baron’s throat.

You watched mesmerised, without even blinking. It felt like a dream more than reality.

“The Arrakeen Palace will be considered cursed for all the Barons and Dukes from now on,” you only said.

Without a word, Feyd dropped the blade and fell on his knees in front of you, pulling you close by your hips and burying his face in the fabric of your nightgown right where your womb was. You knew what he wanted. A praise, an approval, a blessing.

“My Baroness,” he breathed out.

“Stand tall, my Baron,” you caressed his head and he looked up. His eyes sparkled in the moonlight and you cupped his chin to caress his full lips with your thumb. “You’ve made me proud and happy, my darling,” you assured him. 

He nodded at you and collected the discarded blade from the floor. It was important not to leave any trace. You both went back to your chambers and laid down in bed, pretending to be asleep – too excited to actually be able to drift off. This time you didn’t feel guilty even a little bit like after the death of the harpies. This time it didn’t even feel like murder or taking another human being’s life. This time it felt like nothing but relief.

You watched the sunrise through the window with your head on your husband’s chest and his hand rubbing your back, waiting for the remaining servants’ screams to signal the beginning of the new era.

There were screams indeed. People were running, yelling, banging on your door. Both Feyd and you acted surprised and startled at the news but Astra and Cara had to be the only people in the palace who actually believed your story. The medic inspected the Baron’s body and started to wonder if it really had been Muad’Dib’s work since the cuts did not remind of the Fremen weapons. Feyd only hissed at him so the medic stopped any further insinuations.

Count Rabban’s behaviour surprised you the most as he was following his brother around and seeming to act like the most loyal and obedient subject. He had quickly realised it was the best chance of survival for him. He hadn’t questioned anything so far and simply followed every word leaving his younger brother’s mouth.

Everything was a mess and chaos on that day but it was mostly Feyd dealing with it, basking in his new title and glory, as you were sitting on your bed with terrified Astra and Cara, holding them both and assuring them of their safety.

“How can you not be worried, na-baroness? I mean, Baroness?” Astra widened her eyes. “If Muad’Dib was here last night… Oh, I don’t even want to imagine what would happen if he went inside your chambers instead…”

“My husband would defend me,” you kissed her forehead and then you kissed Cara’s.

“What if he comes back?” Cara was shaking out of fear and you felt bad for making them feel like this but you couldn’t tell them the truth. “Now, when they know that we have fewer guards around?”

“We will be prepared this time,” you squeezed their hands. “My girls, I am sorry for being insensitive but I shall get dressed in mourning attire now and finally join my husband to help him with the officialties.”

Every lady travelled with a mourning dress just in case. Yours was a combination of black silk and black armour pieces with chains, connected to the matching headpiece. It looked dignified and intimidating – exactly how you wanted it to look like. You had already dreamt of The Baron’s death while planning your trip. Therefore the mourning dress you had chosen was accurate to your new role of The Baroness.

It sounded so good. For the upcoming days you would get drunk on the way people would address you. And then, when you'd finally be back on Giedi Prime, there would be a lavish celebration and official event for you two becoming the new Baron and Baroness. You couldn't wait for that day.

You smiled to yourself in the mirror and fixed the headpiece for one last time as you adjusted the Atreides signet ring on your pinky finger. On your pointing finger there was a huge ring with the Harkonnen emblem. And hidden between the folds of your dress and attached to the armour piece on your hip was the blade your husband had given you on the day of his birthday. No one could see it but you could reach for it swiftly in the case of emergency.

You joined Feyd in the conference room and everyone straightened at the sight of you. They always would but this time it felt different. You were the one holding the power – and they respected you for you, not for the fact that you were under protection of The Baron.

“Baroness,” they bowed down and went back to work, avoiding your gaze.

“How are things going?” You approached Feyd as he looked you up and down with a smirk. You put your hand on his chest.

“I sent Rabban back on Giedi Prime with our uncle’s body,” he told you and held your hand to lay a kiss upon it. “He will take care of the affairs there until we finish our business on Arrakis. I want to take care of that Muad’Dib rat before returning home and finding someone worthy to replace me as the Governor here. Rabban will also send us more Harkonnen troops since we have lost many guards last night,” he informed you in an official manner.

“We must avenge our late Lord Baron,” you clenched your jaw as you nodded. His eyes sparkled with mockery as he pretended to look worried.

You were sure that most people in that room had known the truth but they kept their poker faces on and allowed you to play out this little scene.

“My Lord,” one of the engineers raised his voice, concerned. Feyd turned around and you both stared at the hologram of the Arrakis globe. Red dots started to appear on the orbit. “We have guests,” the engineer explained. “The ships are definitely not ours.”

“Who is it?” Feyd barked at him. “Find that out, we are not expecting anyone,” he looked at you, a little concerned.

You were not pleased with the idea of guests now, out of all times, either. 

“Who dares to interrupt our peace unannounced on the day after our late Lord Baron’s tragic death?” You asked out loud, playing your mourning role the best you could.

What a mockery it was that you had to be hiding all the grief after your actual family but had to display fake tears for the man you had hated with every fibre of your being.

“M-my Lord, my Lady…” the engineer turned around with his eyes widened, “it’s the Emperor himself… The whole imperial delegation.”

You and Feyd looked at each other.

“It took them days to get here. There is no way they are here because of last night’s incident,” Feyd pointed out. “Still, I do not understand. I have brought the spice production back to full efficiency. What could be the reason for his visit?”

You moved uncomfortably as your son kicked your rib. As if he too knew of the importance of this sudden imperial audience. It would be the first time you’d greet someone of such importance as The Harkonnen Baroness and it would be the first time you’d see the Emperor face to face. He had visited your father a few times on Caladan but children had not been allowed near their meetings.

“We have to greet him and find out,” you took a deep breath in, preparing yourself mentally for the first challenge in your new role.

You shot Feyd a glance and he nodded at you, reassuringly. With him by your side, it couldn’t go that bad, you tried to convince yourself. His presence was equipping you with courage and determination you had not known before.

Everything you were doing now, you were doing for the two of you and your future. Nothing else mattered.

MASTERLIST

#dune x reader #dune fanfic #dune imagine #feyd rautha x reader #feyd rautha fanfic #feyd rautha imagine #feyd rautha harkonnen x reader #feyd rautha harkonnen fanfic #feyd rautha harkonnen imagine #austin butler x reader #lilysfiction #tttw

[uglyducklingofthe2000s]

Never Mix Business With Pleasure - LN

A request from @luvrrish

Summary: After a disappointing one night stand, y/n finds her new boss is the man behind the disappointment. She'd spared him the knowledge till a staff night leads to an indirect admission that she's faked an orgasm. Out of some pride, Lando has to know if she did with him.

Themes: Smut (eventually), nipple piercing (is back bby)

No part 2 requests please

Y/n had known she'd recognised Lando, but a couple drinks deep into the night. She really couldn't think straight other than the man was surely worth having between her legs.

Turns out she only wanted him between her legs till he got there.

Not that he was...bad. But more accurately...selfish.

Admittedly, she snuck out of there as soon as he was snoring beside her. Not entirely her brightest of ideas. But she really felt no appeal of sticking around for an awkward morning after.

What she didn't expect was a week later for her to find him at the head of the table leading a meeting at her new job.

Now y/n is an adult she can have a one night stand and it not be awkward. Especially since she's almost certain that he has no idea she faked it.

"Y/n, can we just have a chat?" Lando asks when Max calls the meeting to an end, though Lando's best friend looks at him suspiciously since usually Lando doesn't bother to invest his time in new employees.

"Uh-Yes, yes. Of course." Y/n confirms before the rest of the room leaves and closes the door.

"I just wanted to make sure that you're...not uncomfortable working here-"

"Mr Norris, you're my boss and our one night stand happened before my official employment start date. I am more than capable of maintaining a professional relationship with you as I'm sure you are with me. It's only the two of us who know and we're adults, I'm sure that we can get over having seen each other naked." Y/n smiles trying to maintain as cool and unbothered an attitude as possible while keeping herself professional.

"Yeah right, I just...wanted to make sure you were comfortable. And everyone here kind of builds a friendship so just call me Lando. Mr Norris is...professional but too professional for me."

"Right, Lando. Anyway, I know you need to get off. So I'll not keep you."

-

Y/n did make friends with everyone at Quadrant. She also really found this to be the best job she's ever had.

Thankfully, Lando has such a busy schedule beyond Quadrant. He's not there nearly as often as she had originally anticipated and when he is, neither of them struggle.

Although it has only been 2 weeks.

"I bet y/n has some secrets. We can get out of her." Ria comments when the game of never have I ever is thrown out as part of the gathering.

It was meant to be for staff, but there was definitely a few plus ones who had beefed the group up and quite a few that y/n didn't know.

"Secrets? I'm an open book." Y/n laughs while swallowing back a mouthful of water since she's determined to not end the night anything more than tipsy.

They each go about saying a never have I ever, some of them going for boring safe options and some of them going for the spicier variety.

"Alright, this one is for the ladies...and maybe the men. Never had I ever faked an orgasm." Max states seeming to watch his own girlfriend who takes a small sip making the room burst into laughter.

"It wasn't with you." She assures him with a pitiful pat that seems to be more of a "I'm trying to save you while also being honest in front of your friends".

Y/n and Ria actually cheers as they also take a mouthful of their drinks.

Y/n really didn't think to check if Lando was watching her, it hadn't struck her that he might be or that he might even care. After all he certainly didn't in the moment. So the idea he would now never crossed her mind.

The game goes on before people eventually get bored or too drunk to focus.

Y/n ends up deciding to be one of the first to leave, though it's not as if she's leaving early. It's near enough 1 in the morning.

"I was going to leave too. I'll give you a ride." Lando states catching up to her as she pulls on her jacket at the doorway, the suggestion of him driving her making her frown. "I haven't been drinking-well one drink, but nothing strong."

"I don't know if we're going in the same direction. I could walk to my place from here." Y/n murmurs since there's something about Lando's expression that makes her feel like there's a reason he rushed to leave early. "It's only about a 15 minute walk really."

"Well it'll be even quicker and warmer in my car." Lando smiles making her look at him for a moment before she nods.

"Yeah, you're right." Y/n nods before following him out.

He's got one of his expensive ass sports cars that she could maybe afford if she spent the rest of her life not spending a penny on anything, not even food, and then worked till she was 150. Then she might be able to afford a second had version.

"You look annoyed." Lando comments making her furrowed brows quickly raise themselves while he adjusts his grip on the steering wheel. "Actually I wanted to ask you something."

"Oh ok." Y/n nods feeling herself get a little nervous.

Lando might not be as involved in the day to day workings of Quadrant as she'd thought when she realised he is her boss. But he is still her boss, if he decides she's not performing well enough then he is well within his rights to fire her.

Fuck.

"Back when we were playing that game, you drank when Max asked if anyone had faked an orgasm." Lando states keeping his eyes trained perfectly on the road.

"Yeah." Y/n confirms suddenly gritting her teeth at the feeling of where this conversation is going to go. "I mean I think all women have."

"Yeah, yeah. I know. I just...did you with me?"

How fast is he going? To fast for her to open the door for a jump, tuck and roll manoeuvre?

This is not a conversation she wants to have with any man, much less a man who turned out to be her boss. But something tells her she won't believe her if she lies.

"Yeah, I did." Y/n admits watching his knuckles turn white from his grip on the steering wheel. "It's-Well I was a bit drunk, it's harder for me when I've had a drink."

Not entirely a lie, but also not exactly the truth. She tends to last a bit longer while drunk but it doesn't stop her from getting there.

"You don't have to lie to save my feelings." Lando states making her sigh. "I could make it up to you."

"Lando, that's really not necessary." Y/n tries since she isn't looking to make a man insecure. "It's not as if every woman ever has faked with you. It's just...sometimes it's easier."

"But I'd like to make it up to you." Lando stresses making her sigh again. "It doesn't have to be tonight...what if...I took you on a date?" Lando tries making her almost jerk her head back in reaction.

"You want to take me on a date?"

"I mean I would be up for it tonight, but I feel like it might be awkward now." Lando murmurs earning a small smile.

"That's true...Well you have my number, you can call me with plans and I definitely won't turn you away." Y/n states softly making Lando finally manage a small smile.

Y/n directs him to her apartment before she does give him a hug and a kiss on the cheek goodbye.

-

There was a few date ideas that y/n had. Lando flying her out to join him on one of the race weekends was really not on the list.

"This is insane." Y/n murmurs to herself as Lando walks in behind her.

He'd made sure she flew with him on the jet and pulled out all the stops for her in addition to that. She's never felt so well off in her life.

"You alright?" Lando asks making her turn and look at him for a moment.

"Yeah, just...it's the nicest hotel I've ever been in." Y/n laughs lightly before feeling his hand on the small on her back. "I feel like I'm underdressed just for a lobby."

"You're fine." Lando assures her with a small laugh before he moves them to the reception desk and checks them in then starting to guide her to the lift as he sorts through the keys. "I got them to give us a suite with an adjoining room. Just so you got your own space."

"So am I here to call you my boss or just...a one night stand redemption?" Y/n asks trying to ease her own tension.

"Neither of those sound great." Lando hums as the lift appears and they step in. "Just call me your...date."

"My date." Y/n echoes then smiling at him in slightly approval.

-

Lando really doesn't want to rush y/n into having sex, even if he's determined to show that he's not some inexperienced idiot who has no concept of the female body.

Admittedly, he didn't put his all into the first time they had sex. But the idea of her faking an orgasm just made him feel sick to his stomach for some reason.

He took her to play golf, then out for a meal and they were nearing the end of being able to stretch out the meal any longer.

"We should probably go. You've been looking at me like I'm the next course for a while now." Y/n comments trying to hide her smile.

Lando decides not to comment since maybe his thoughts have been slightly more x-rated selection. Though he genuinely thinks he can't be blamed, y/n dressed to impress and she achieved that and more. But he's not about to make this about him at all.

He manages to get the check and pay for everything before they head out.

"I've never been so lavished before sex. This must be what sugar babies feel like." Y/n jokes before clearing her throat when she realises that might not be a joke he's very happy to be a part of.

"I hope it doesn't actually feel like that." Lando laughs lightly as the valet appears with his car.

"No." Y/n confirms with a soft smile as the second valet opens the door for her and they both climb in. "Now I just have to trust that I am getting an orgasm tonight."

"You think I'm stopping at one? That's bold." Lando comments making her pause for a moment.

"How many are you stopping at?" Y/n chokes out not expecting it to have had to be a question between them.

"You'll just have to wait and find out." Lando shrugs innocently but the smirk speaks for itself and actually, whether it's the intended affect or not, she's not sure but it sort of turns her on.

When they get to the hotel, Lando again hands his car over to the valet before quickly moving around and dismissing the valet about to help y/n out of the depth.

"Thank you." She smiles as he quickly leads her inside.

Admittedly the anticipation that should be making this all so awkward is actually just making her more eager. His promise of multiple orgasms definitely makes her feel a little more eager to get to the hotel suite.

It's either going to live up to his promise, fall short or make her figure out a way to really sell her fake orgasm as believable and never tell him that actually it was yet another disappointment.

"You look like you're thinking pretty hard." Lando comments as they step into the lift.

"Yeah, I'm just thinking...what your plan might be." Y/n murmurs earning a small smirk. "I hope you're not about to get performance anxiety."

"No. Definitely not." Lando chuckles, somewhat hating that his hotel room is so high up meaning the lift is taking slightly longer to get them to their floor.

Lando's hand links to her own as they near their floor and just as they step out he manages to gently tug her into a kiss, his hands landing on her waist as they kiss and y/n steps backwards, trusting his guidance.

The room isn't far from the lift so when he breaks the kiss, it's not a long distance later that she finds herself gently pushed into the room in a brief pause.

Lando kicks the door closed and proves that actually when he wants to try, he certainly can seduce a woman with just touch. The touch that's specifically working, is his ability to slide the slinky slip dress off of y/n's body.

The silky material slides down off of her body with ease and she's left with no bra and admittedly some strings worth of underwear. She also steps out her heels as Lando lifts her up to wrap her legs around his waist.

There's definitely a bit of a power play with Lando still fully dressed while she's literally one flimsy and quickly dampening piece of material away from completely naked and exposed to him.

She's placed down on the bed with Lando's lips kissing down her body.

"I definitely did not appreciate your body enough last time." Lando comments, lips brushing her skin as he pauses the kisses moving down her body.

Y/n actually arches up against the soft feeling of his lips before he lifts up and removes his jacket that he's been wearing just for some more movability.

"You know I've tried to keep professional..." Lando admits moving his hand up to her boob, thumb gently rubbing over her piercing making her teeth nibble on her lip. "...but every time I saw you, I kept thinking of this shiny little piece of metal."

"Well, it's fully healed and free use to play with." Y/n smiles shifting to try and stop arching up into his back like she'd doing instinctually.

Lando smirks at her comment before he finally reaches down to the so far neglected area that he's most eager to get access to. He presses his fingers onto her slit through the wet material then having to use his free hand to keep her thighs from closing on him.

"Don't tease." Y/n murmurs impatiently while Lando just remains quiet pushing the fabric aside and testing her wetness before pushing a finger into her and pressing his thumb onto her clit which even to her own admission, she wasn't really expecting him to find or touch with such precision.

He wastes no time pushing a second finger in when he leans forward choosing to pay attention to her nipples too, the feel of a piece of metal between his lips is sort of unfamiliar but the reaction from y/n is a quick pay off, already twitching around his fingers. Feeling the beginnings of her build up towards an orgasm.

His hand is soaked already from her and he's suddenly realising the moans she's producing sound significantly less controlled and more genuine than what he recalls of their previous hook up.

When he finally locates her g-spot that's when things really change, he can feel her body started to tense from underneath him.

Y/n whines a little, feeling the build up starting to near the peak. Lando does let up on her nipples either his mouth on the pierced one and his free hand on the unpierced one. When she completely tenses, arching a little up against him. the moan that escapes her lips and the feeling of her thighs locking to squeeze either side of him might just be better than the feeling of his own orgasm.

She's clamped down on his fingers with a tightness that he's already going to dream about for a long time.

"Fuck." Y/n whimpers when she finally relaxes and melts down onto the bed. "Fuck, Lando."

"That's just the beginning, I told you more than one." Lando chuckles then shifting up to kiss her. "But it's good to know what a real orgasm sounds like from you."

Y/n almost wants to be insulted that her fake orgasm apparently isn't anything like the real thing. But maybe she shouldn't really be insulted by it.

"I've never have multiple orgasms before."

"Happy to be the first to make it happen." Lando smirks then gently blowing on her nipple as he goes back down her body. "Part of my redemption."

Y/n breathes a little, her body shuddering when he gets low enough to see her pussy still pulsing from her first orgasm. She's not even sure what it feels like for someone to give her head after she's already had an orgasm.

"This is going to sound stupid, but I didn't know it was possibly for every part of a person to look so pretty." Lando comments and she's about to say something, only for him to latch his hands onto the top of her thighs before he dives in-between them and licks her up and down. His nose managing to nudge her clit that was still entirely oversensitive at the feeling of pressure on it.

"Jesus christ." Y/n breathes, mainly to herself at the feeling of Lando treating her exactly like she'd joked earlier in that she's the final course of his meal.

Actually it feels like she's completely devoured by the man, she's not sure if the build up is just as quick, slower or faster but she can feel it already and her jaw drops open a little.

"Lando." Y/n whimpers, not being able to stop herself from threading her hand into his hair.

There's something that sort of dawns on Lando as he doesn't let up, he's never cared all that much about a woman's side of the pleasure. Sure it's a great addition and he enjoys giving head, but with y/n there's something much more satisfying.

Maybe it's a point to prove, or maybe it's how good his name sounds being moaned by her.

Her voice wobbles in another moan before she feels her orgasm hit her much harder, and with less of a build up. It hits her, catching her off guard but she's not so sure Lando was as surprised about it. Not that he lets up, hell he seems to extend the length of her orgasm from just keeping going and if her brain didn't feel slightly fuzzy then she might question if he'd even noticed she was hit with the waves of more ecstasy.

She hardly has a moment to catch her breath before he's shifted, finally getting himself undressed as he can't wait any longer to get inside her.

"You ok?" He asks climbing back over her making her nod quickly, seemingly desperate but wordless as she tries to pull him closer.

Really y/n is torn between the temptation of a third orgasm and the fear of what it will actually feel like.

When he pushes into her, she reminds her voice enough to moan while he drops his head into her neck trying to keep himself from caving into the urge to really let every ounce of his energy go into her. Not straight away at least.

"Move, move. Please." Y/n whines making him hum before she whines at him then being silenced when he kisses her and begins thrusting in and out of her.

The angle must be working because he knocks her g-spot consistently and she's scrambling for grip, unable to choose between the sheets and latching onto Lando. It's not really any time before her third orgasm hits as she actually cries out holding on tightly to him.

"Oh I'm not done yet, gorgeous." Lando chuckles, though he certainly was close. He managed to hold out. For some reason he just wants to aim for four.

It's his number after all.

Y/n whines trying to latch onto him tightly before holding onto him as he keeps going, but he manages to wiggle free only just so he can roll them over and sit her up to straddle him. He's not getting lazy, he just needs better access if he's going to get the fourth.

After a few thrusts with his hand reaching down to gently press on her clit, it seems to strike her like electricity and she tightens around him so much that he almost feels pain, but he stops fighting his own finish and groans pumping into her with no thought other than he is definitely doing this again if she'll let him.

Y/n falls forward against Lando, breathless and whimpering with every exhale.

"Fuck. Fucking hell, you were holding back on me that much?" Y/n whispers, not quite having found her voice properly.

"Sorry, I promise to never let it happen again." Lando laughs while she hides her face in his neck as he gently strokes her sides. "Take all the recovery time you need."

"I will. Trust me." Y/n groans trying not to think about the sheer amount of sweat and other fluids they're both coated in.

After a while Lando does manage to move her to lie beside him, purely because he wants to at least clean them up a little and get y/n some water.

"Thank you." Y/n mumbles as he wipes her with a damp cloth.

"You really don't need to thank me." Lando sighs shaking his head at her while she smiles lazily. "But if you want to thank me. Another date and significantly more sex like that would be something I'd accept."

"I think I might be able to muster that up." Y/n nods, biting her lip a little as she tries to hide a grin. "Especially when this is the treatment I get afterwards."

"Yeah?" Lando laughs lightly before looking around for the room service menu.

"Yeah." Y/n nods then smiling when he hands her the menu. "Is this for sustenance?"

"I'm a caring man. You need to reenergise." Lando grins then rubbing her tummy.

"So what do I call you now? Just so when I talk to being railed, they know the status." Y/n smiles earning an eye roll. "Just my date?"

"I fucking hope not." Lando grumbles then looking at her for a moment. "Boyfriend, if you're ok with that."

"I think I'm definitely ok with that." Y/n confirms before she let's out a heavy sigh and relaxes down into the soft bed then remembering the amount of fluids on it. "Oh god, we're sleeping in my bed tonight. These sheets are so dirty now."

Taglist: @namgification @hiireadstuff @jsjcue @geniusalpaca @itsjustkhaos @llando4norris @partyinpitlane @lpab @xoscar03 @harrysdimple05

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[nexusnyx]

my fellow, my guy

Joel Miller x f!Reader [5.3k] Summary: All his attempts at faking nonchalance about anything are gone out of the window just like that. Four words and Joel's changed. In his bones, the very chemistry of his brain. "'Cause he's my guy." How did he ever manage to not claim you in front of the world? He has no clue, but Joel's changing that. Tonight.

— A/n 📝I wanted to try something different. What if possessive!Reader brought out the possessiveness in Joel? Reblogs and comments make all the difference. — Warnings⚠️ mature content—explicit depictions of sex, so minors dni. | 🏷️ age gap, established relationship, rough sex, possessive!Joel, dirty talking, thigh riding, spanking, soft!Dom!Joel, possessive!Reader, oral (f receiving), penetration, creampie.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤmasterlist | read on ao3

In the middle of what seemed like a sea of infinite, boring nothingness, Joel is hooked by the magnitude of your nature's force — the power in the way you stand; your presence.

His favorite thing ever since he met you. Everything about you.

Since he arrived at Jackson's community with Ellie two years ago, he's been blinded by it.

Your light, heat, glow. Joel might as well be a moth, and it amazed him now that he thought of it, how long he managed to pretend he was anything by mesmerized by your flames. In the middle of the meeting, you utter the words that snap something inside him, and Joel feels his inner workings shifting. Four words and Joel's changed:

"'Cause he's my guy."

All his attempts at faking nonchalance about anything are gone out of the window just like that. In his bones, the very chemistry of his brain — Joel feels a snap, and he sort of... embraces it.

There's silence around the table for only a second.

Nathan had asked: "But why does he get to go if it's that dangerous? I get it when you go by yourself 'cause we know you're different, but I've asked you multiple times, and it's always no. I just — I don't get why he's going."

And you had answered.

Loud and clear.

"Not that you have to get anything, Nathan, since you don't have the ground knowledge to be second-guessing my decisions of any plans, but — it's simple. I'll answer you. 'Cause he's my guy. And I'll take him to wherever I please."

You had paused, lifted both eyebrows in question, and Nathan remained silenced.

Joel freezes at first, too. When you say 'he's my guy' the words shoot like a freezing spell that hits his blood, but even with almost all eyes turning shamelessly to him, Joel can feel his shoulders relaxing further back the more you stare at him. In only a second he sees a lot of words running through your eyes, and all he can think back is a litany of — yes exactly yes—

He leans back on the chair's backrest. Both of his feet slide a few inches further, his legs spreading wider.

He is your guy.

Has been for a while now. A year — almost a year a half, if he was being really accurate. While both of you managed to keep that hidden for the better half of that time, lately the nosy (and delusional) jackasses like Nathan were prodding into your business with jabs here and there. Tauntings about the 'nature' of things between you and him. As if they couldn't see it in both of your eyes. Your postures. The way you walked side by side.

No matter how private you two tried being, you two almost had rings gravitating the bubble created around you, like Saturn in the sky.

Joel knew they frowned upon him. Talked about him on his back — about him and his daughter, about his daughter's personality, and the way Joel Miller seems to 'have only smiles for his Ranger neighbor'.

The silence around the table's broken by his own voice, letting the words slip out of his tongue. "Don't worry, Nathan. 'm not decorative. I've got good aim. If you're worried about her safety, don't be."

What a jackass move. That's what the smile on the corner of your mouth said to him. "See? So helpful. We'll all be fine, and once we're through there and come back, everyone else can be fine too knowing there's nothing to worry about."

With a sigh, you get up before Nathan can finish collecting his patience from the floor, or wipe away the humiliation of being rejected for what is far from the first time since he's unable to accept a refusal without embarrassing himself.

"Are we all clear?"

After a round of verbal agreement from the table — one of which comes through gritted teeth — you nod once, put on a smile, and sigh loudly. "Excellent. You're all free to go."

It was so, so — hot. Enticing, and hypnotizing.

The power you had over people that came not because of something futile, but because of how capable your hands were. Joel was an imbecile if he was being honest with himself.

How did he ever manage to not claim you in front of the world? He has no clue, but Joel's changing that.

Tonight.

He sits back and waits while the room empties out, slowly.

Some people linger back to talk to each other, to him, to you. He answers all of them without ever turning his body away from you, and when there are only a handful of people left, Joel remains seated, with no rush to gather his jacket or things since he's leaving with the person who's closing the whole building.

He's leaving with you.

Tommy, Mercedes, and Max are the last ones hanging around, and while the two latter go exchange a word with you — "good gods, can we do a round table vote to kick fucking Nathan out of here? I know he's a master engineer or whatever, but fuck, man, he's annoying", starts Max — his brother knocks his elbow on his side.

Joel looks up to find the smirk on Tommy's face.

"If you had feathers, you'd be peacocking all over the goddamn room," he whispers for Joel's ears only.

Joel laughs under his breath. "Shut up."

Tommy shakes his head, laughing as well. "Nah, I won't, actually. I happen to like seein' that stupid look on your goddamn face."

"Is that so?" Joel wants to sound a little more sarcastic, but with the huge smile he feels imprinted on his face, it's impossible to do so.

"Damn right it is," Tommy chuckles. "And you know why it's the best seein' that smile puttin' even a glint in your eyes, huh?"

Oh, god, here he goes. "Why?"

"Because this is the best damn I told you so on the planet. Well — one of the best. There's space for more," Tommy pouts, looking up with a musing look. "A couple of really big others." He looks down at Joel again, smiling from ear to ear. "I've gotten really smart in your absence, and I wanna hear the day when you'll admit it."

Joel's amused by the confidence — if Tommy's right about many other things Joel will find out eventually, but this, he owns.

Tommy introducing Joel to you with only a nudge in the right direction was all it took.

"We'll see about those," Joel answers and Tommy huffs good-heartedly in response, an image most familiar to Joel.

Now again, after almost decades without it.

Joel's happy for many reasons, it seems.

He sinks his feet in the feeling, not wanting to track back to things he's unable to change.

Tommy opens his mouth to say something, but Joel catches a cue from across the room:

Keys. Your set of keys when grabbed from the table make a known sound, and it's like an alarm — a triggering sound that connects to routine. He hears them and Tommy turns around, seeing how Max and Mercedes are leaving.

Joel and Tommy move in sync toward you, and everybody — with the exception of Joel and you — bids their goodbyes at the door outside.

As soon as they're out of sight, Joel turns to find your eyes already waiting for his.

He never had this type of relationship before. Never saw in someone's eyes the thoughts running through their mind at that exact moment, and it was exhilarating.

You knew your words had affected them.

The only thing you were probably unaware of was the epiphany that accompanied them — the moment his mind came to a halt.

The inner fight over faking being empty.

It was so silly. Joel was full.

"If I kiss you here, we're not gonna stop," Joel informs you.

A breathless chuckle leaves you, and you take a step, falling gracefully into his hold. "Really?"

Joel loves sultriness in your voice. "Really." He goes back to the words he's been letting your mind soak up. Closes his eyes, leaning his forehead on yours as his arm locks around you. "How could you do that to me, hm?"

His own voice is wrecked. Sounds like something out of a ridiculous sex tape, or one of those Star Wars movies from back in the way.

Seemingly content with what you've done, Joel feels your giggling more than hears it—the huffs of breath on his chin and cheeks tickle. "I wasn't really thinking when I said it? It's just — it was the third time he questioned me choosing you to team up and I know it's stupid to let it get to me, I know Nathan's just — jealous, which is even more ridiculous than anything, but I hate the way he speaks over me sometimes. I hate it! And when I saw... it'd slipped out."

It's the coyness at the end of your ramble that gets him to open his eyes.

"Slipped out," he echoes.

You nod, smiling up at him. A little shy, a little devious. "Yeah."

The worst part is — he believed you. "I believe you." Truth does that. It slips out. It's uncontainable, like sunshine or water or rain.

Then, you're happier, and whenever your smile widened like that, Joel was always taken over by the desire to kiss you. This time, he embraced the hunger with open arms and leaned to capture what he wanted.

None of you discussed the lack of control of doing this only seconds after he just said there was no controlling him, but this was more than a need — or delicious, wet evidence —, it was breathing.

Joel inhales deeply while his tongue tangles with yours, his hands finding their path easily to your hair through your favorite spots and detours on your neck. He kisses them just to breathe.

He went without addiction for so long in this world.

When your throat vibrations with a low moan, Joel knows why.

He'd been weak before. No room in him for addictions if there were no higher parts of him working. No real thinking, feeling, existing.

People turned to things that gave them a thrill because existing demanded too much. A strenuous task with little to no rewards, which made everyone to need an escape.

Thankfully, you were no escape.

And as far as vices went, the taste of you was an infinite, healthy, and powerful source for one.

He pulls back for oxygen, breathing out slowly the warmness you leave in his chest.

"So I'm your guy." Joel needed to hear it again, maybe. He liked how the words sounded on his lips, too.

"You are."

Sweet Jesus.

He needs to get you home before starting this shit. "Fuck," it slips out. You laugh, resting your forehead on his sternum, and Joel nods to you and to himself. "'kay. We need to go. Let's go?"

"Yeah".

"Alright. No distractin' me while I'm drivin', ya hear me?"

Despite having already done everything tonight, you still have the audacity to whine at his request. Joel ought to slap your ass right there in the middle of the street. On the sidewalk outside where both of you work, often.

He takes advantage of the hand on your hair, making a fist with it — as carefully as he can be — and grips just right.

Putting his mouth to your ear, he whispers. "I'll spank ya 'till your ass is red if you whine again before my tongue's buried in your pussy." Joel lives for the way you gasp for him. He presses his whole body flushed with yours, and hears the repressed groan in your throat when you feel it. "I've been half hard since what you said sank in. Calling me yours like that, claiming me for everybody to hear. Had to fuckin' stop myself from thinkin' about fucking you on that table for everyone to see. Don't make me crazier than I already am, I swear to—" his final words end muffled on your lips.

Instead of finishing, he just gets another little taste of you.

One for the road.

For safe keeping.

Joel had such a distance between his mind now and the memories of his young adult years that every time this happened, he felt a little choked up:

nostalgia.

True, genuine nostalgia.

For him, it came in waves.

It smelled of his first trip to the beach, and the taste of gelato sticking sweet on his tongue. Showing him real sweetness for the first time.

That's what driving home to you feels like.

Joel's still not used to your eyes on him. Being looked at with so much hunger scared him at first. Joel thought these days were past him. He imagined luxury, lust, adventure, and the nice, saccharine-type of adrenaline all belonged in his past.

To a Joel that died when Cordyceps wrecked the world.

It turned out that your fingertips on his thigh touched the parts of him that proved his wonderings wrong.

Sure, he had trouble getting hard all by himself if he wanted to jack off on a random weekday, but — put you biting your bottom lip on the passenger seat, and Joel was bulging inside his jeans, stiff as a rock and with no rush to see the end of it.

The silence that blanketed the car comfortably is thrown out of the window when you two enter his room, fully clothed.

You are so good for him.

When Joel kicks his bedroom door closed behind him, you are still. Waiting for it.

Knowing exactly what he needs.

A shiver runs through his whole body, and Joel sits on his armchair to remove his boots. He turns on the soft light on the interrupter behind him, feeling around the wall for it so his eyes can remain on you. When the room's illuminated by yellow, warm light, Joel kicks off his shoes and spreads his legs, making himself comfortable.

"Take off your shoes." He loves this part. "And your pants." Joel's hand comes up to his beard, rubbing the patchy hair. "Then get here," he pats his lap, and watches as you do as he asked.

Slowly. Exactly how he likes it.

Joel keeps smoothing out the hair on his face as he watches you do it. The right word for what awakens inside him every time his eyes land on more and more skin, and more of your body, is adoration.

He'd been attracted to some people since the outbreak happened, it'd be impossible for him not to — Joel pretended for a long while to be devoid of feelings, not being dead.

Attraction and primal, raw desire might belong in the same family, but they lived on almost opposite ends of the spectrum. The first was the beginning of 'Interest' while the second was the furthest point of it.

Joel desired you for things that went far beyond your looks, but gods—

The looks.

He was painfully attracted to you, and he knew it dripped out of him.

When you strip off from all the item he asks for and walks to him, Joel puts his legs together to give you space in his armchair. His arms open up to welcome your body straddling his, then wrap around you, pulling you as close as possible.

As if he wished to trap you.

You wished he would.

For a while, all he does is feel you up.

His hands run over every exposed inch of your skin while his face rubs on your neck and your face, beard leaving the first tingles of what later will be red burns. Meanwhile, your body ignites as if fuel is being added to fire.

The longer Joel touches you, rubs on you, leaves trails of his mouth and his kisses on the skin it passes through, the hotter you burn. It starts as a fire in your brain — Joel started as a single flame somewhere in your mind, one you were unable to pin a finger on and eventually put out, and it grew, and it took over. His heat spreads from a fog around your thoughts to your neck. It descends to your neck, then it warms your chest.

When his tongue and teeth scrape a spot in your jugular, the storm he caused settles in between your legs, causing them to rut against his lap, rocking against the bulge inside his pants.

Joel hums in your neck, pulling back to look at your face. His smile is smug, and you say it you hate it every time you see it. "Stupid cocky smile." The words are ineffective as always — in face of how breathy you sound, the way your hips are moving in circles on top of him, they're empty.

"You love my cocky everything." Stupid cocky bastard.

Your mouth crashes against him, landing in a bruising kiss.

Joel never minded your roughness.

He embraced it however it came, whenever it came. Joel liked it. In all its forms, it was beautiful to him.

It matches the despair inside him. Joel enjoys how he's able to devour you, sometimes whole, because you feast on him as well. You tongue is hot and heavy on his, and your moans awaken the words from the meeting back to him.

Joel kisses even harder.

His hands — one on the nape of your neck and the other grabbing at your back, your boobs, your stomach — both move to your waist and guide your moves to slow it down.

When you pull back to breathe, Joel wants to feel everything.

He takes off your shirt in one swift motion, throwing them off somewhere without care. He removes your top as well, then takes a moment to appreciate the view.

"Take my clothes off, baby." He hates to have you off his lap for even a moment, but for this, it's worth it.

Since the first time he slept with you, Joel chooses to let you undress him if he can. If he's not in a rush to have you, if it's not one of those incredible moments when he already wakes up with you naked and him still only in boxers — if he can, Joel picks this—

Your fingers sometimes are desperate. Buttons are your worst enemy when all you want is him naked for you, but most of the time, you take your time. Do it slowly, taking off each item with the care he never seems to have for your clothes because all Joel cares for is your skin.

"I like taking them off."

"Why?"

"Remember how I asked you that first time to do it?"

"Yeah."

"So — I wanted to do it for so long. I—don't laugh at me, or — look at me weird, but. I thought about it. A lot. Thought about... all these layers you're often using. And — I'm crazy about your body. You—I know you complain about the aches and joke about being old and frail, which is — bullshit. Ridiculous, and everyone knows it. It's just... I like that you let me do it. I like that I get to undress you. It's hot. You're hot."

The memory strikes him again — as it does when he's in this position — and Joel feels a little raw.

Now that he knows how you feel, it makes it more real.

How you peel off his shirt by running your palms across his chest all the way through his back. Undoing the zipper of his pants, you palm the outline of his cock, then get down on both knees to pull them all the way off. Joel helps by lifting his hips a little, and seeing the way your eyes snap to his groin makes him burn.

Joel knows exactly what you'll go for — he watches you remove and throw his jeans to the side, hands running up his calves while you stand on both knees to nibble little bites on his thighs.

He hisses, feeling his dick twitch the closer you get to it. He lets you have your fun, no matter how much it feels like torture.

Your tongue touches the muscle of his inner thigh, sucking a bruise in there, and Joel gasps. "You ain't gonna do what you think you are."

You muffle what he images would be another whine by sucking a bruise on his other thigh. "Please?" You blink your gorgeous eyes, gazing straight at him.

Joel cups your face in one hand, smiling again. He refrains from answering because he likes what comes next.

The kisses that inch closer to his cock. The innocent, and yet siren eyes that stay steady on his while you whisper. "I've been good. Why not?"

"'Cause I have other plans for you."

You perk up. "What d'you want?"

Joel pats his lap. "Get back here."

You do as he says in a second, but instead of straddling both of his thighs, Joel guides you to one of his thighs. It's a tight squeeze in the armchair, but he makes it work. He pulls your panties to the side and pulls you down, feeling the wetness of your cunt at the first movement of your hips.

"That's it," he coos, tangling one hand in your hand to pull you in for a kiss. "Wanna see you get off on my thigh, baby," he kisses your neck, and smiles when you moan at his words and grind harder on him. "Just like that. Gonna use me? Hm?"

"Yeah."

"Gonna use your guy?"

"Joel." Your movements back and forth create a path of slickness in his thigh, and for someone who occasionally needs a little hand from you to get fully hard, he would believe the horniness in his mind that says he's just as young as ever. He feels he's never this hard — this desperate; the wet patch in his boxers only amplifies the louder you moan for him, and with your mouth back on his, Joel can imagine he's a mess.

Not as much as you. Nonetheless — a mess.

With a red, plump mouth, you pull back from his kisses to hold onto his face. Your other hand is gripping the back of his head, and Joel loves the look of pure lust on your face.

The look of someone who's in another dimension of feeling good.

He did that. Joel groans low in his throat when he thinks of it, and assaults your neck with kisses. One hand comes down to slap your ass, and you yelp — the look of surprise that flashes across your features is replaced by one of absolute pleasure within a split second, and Joel growls at witnessing it.

He slaps the other side with his other hand, and you cry for him.

"You're gonna cum like this." He knows you can. Joel's tested several different ways he can bring you to the edge, and this is one of his favorites. "Then, I'm gonna fuck you with my tongue."

"Oh, god." Your cries are accompanied by whimpers at every push of your hips on his thigh, and the slick sounds covering the air are taking away Joel's ability to think of anything other than you.

"Yeah — 'm gonna fuck you so hard, baby, goddamn it."

"Just like — like you want to? On the table?"

"Yes. Fuck—just like that." Joel sees you're teetering on the edge. He recognizes the trembling of your hand fisted in his hand, and the desperate way your hips start moving, almost losing balance. He leans to capture your bottom lip with his teeth, wanting so badly he could eat you. "Cum for me. If I'm yours, then you're mine, right?" Your hips falter at the words, losing their rhythm due to the shiver that runs through you. "That's it. Show me you're my lady. All fuckin' mine. Always so good for me, so fuckin' perfect—god, yeah. Like that — so damn good. Cum, baby. Don't stop. Keep cummin' for me."

Between your first and second orgasm, Joel gets lost in his mind and the moment.

It's rare for that to happen.

For someone who was used to panic rising so fast in his chest that it led to his heart trying to run out of his chest, or at least beat fast enough for it to feel like that, having no other thoughts but the present one and to submerge in what he's feeling.

He had to stop running from it — he feels.

Life never stopped, even if it felt like it did. No broken watch would stop time, and it was you who brought him the realization.

Joel shows his gratitude in one of the few ways he knows to.

One of the few ways he's at least certain he's good at.

By bringing you white bliss, and making you drown in nothing but good, for as long as he can. He carries you to bed and eats you from behind at first. That way Joel can fuck his tongue deeper inside you — he can bend you as far as you'll go and use his tongue until his jaw aches; until it stings and then burns because the reward tastes sweet on his tongue. It washes away all the hurt and gets his humming against your wet and pulsing core.

When he turns you over to do the same thing again but with you on your back, Joel gets lost in the middle of the way.

Your hands make grabby gestures at him.

Legs shaking, your skin covered in sweat, the way you say, "Please get on top of me." It's all too much.

Joel loses his last piece of clothing in one motion, and does something he should know better than to risk.

Grabbing his cock by the base, he drags the head between the lips of your cunt, pulling a moan from both of you. This is where he usually would grab a condom — after teasing you, giving you just the head, making you spread your legs wider or lock your legs behind his ass just to pull him closer.

Not this time. This time, he leans down until his mouth is on your ear and asks. "Can I? I understand if you don't want to—"

"Please. Yes, yes," you interrupt, hooking your legs around him and already pushing his hips closer.

Joel slides deeper, grunting on your neck. "Always so tight," he sounds drunk. "Lemme in, baby... Like that. Breathe deep." Joel's a big man, and the way you slowly relax to take all of him gets to his head every time. "Atta fuckin' girl, jus' like that."

"Joel this feels even better." The whine around the words makes him cry on your shoulder. He knows this is far from being the last time now.

He pulls out and slams it back in. "Fuckin' hell — it does." He thrusts his hips hard, but not fast. He likes to enjoy your sounds.

The filthy ones that fill the room.

If you sense that something shifted in Joel — something in his core, a foundation that he painted a coat of invisible ink over it as if such a thing existed — nothing about you lets that out.

You always held his face in your hands as he buried himself inside you.

The way you look at him — nothing about it is new, either.

Only this time, Joel lets himself feel it all the way through.

He is your guy, after all. He can feel all the good things you bring out in him because you want him to. It matters to you if he's happy or not. If he's safe, and fed, and not in pain. Joel buries himself in you the same way he buried all his hopes long ago — you found it in him, anyway. Years later, somewhere between all the grief and dust, you picked it up and gave it back to him even if he never asked for it.

Joel's usually harsher with you, not because he's trying to be mean, but because you like it when it hurts a little.

"Wanna feel you tomorrow—" are words he's heard a lot coming from you. Today, you say, "You gonna let your cum drip out of me?"

And it fucks with his head. He nods in answer, snapping his hips harder. Joel glues his forehead on yours and nods, grunting with the effort and the delicious drag of your tight cunt squeezing around him.

"'m close, Joel — feels too good."

That's his favorite song. How out of breath you sound, voice higher than ever. "'m gonna cum when you cum. 'm right behind you, baby. 's ok. Take your time. Feels good? Hm? Taking every fuckin' inch of me?"

"Oh god, Joel." Your hips are pushing back on his, and your arms use his shoulders for leverage as you hold onto him.

He laughs, kissing you through gasps and his own sounds. He shares the same air as you, wanting to fuck you so fast and hard that both of your hips will be hurting tomorrow, but he wants this to go on for a long time more than he wants to lose himself in you.

When your begging for "More, please Joel, more—" starts, Joel sits both of you up, pulling you back to his lap. He puts a pillow behind your back, supporting you against the headboard, and sits on his kneels and heels even if tomorrow they'll be aching.

You give him massages when he's hurting.

Joel needs to be as close to you as possible. Like this, your bodies are one.

Like this, you can plant your feet against the bed and fuck him back, as hard and as fast as you want to.

Joel gets a face full of your boobs bouncing up and down and your screams muffling his moans.

He feels it coming — you cling your arm around his shoulder and pull his face to yours again, your mouth hanging open in a perfect O until your eyes close shut.

Joel seems to lose all notion of time as you fall apart on top of him. He feels it all over your body. The orgasm shakes you whole, the trembling only losing for the way your cunt squeezes so hard around him, making it even harder to pull out. He fucks you deep and hard then, and it takes only a few more thrusts before he's moaning in your ear as he fills you up.

Coming down from a high is always difficult.

With you in his arms, it never happens.

Joel plays with his own cum leaking down your thighs, and smiles to himself when you tremble in sensitivity at his minor touches. He'll take a warm cloth and clean you both later, but first, he'll make a mess.

"All mine," he tells you. His fingers graze your clitoris, drenched in the mix of his own release and yours, and something in your eyes tell him you know what he's talking about.

While he may be unable to say some things — and your existence is challenging even that — he can say this much.

He agrees with you.

"All mine," you echo. Your kiss on his lips taste sweeter than before. They taste like I'm yours and you're mine, and for now, that's all he needs.

Joel has you, and you have him. It's all he needs to start.

🏷️ @sakuralikestars — @mostardentily — @thegreat-annamaria — @leiticia — @polyglot-noodle — @casssiopeia — @earthtocharlene — @levylovegood — @simply-sams-things — @lavenderhhze — @gracie7209 — @waywardwolfbonklight — @shadytalething — @yesimwriting — @celestialstar111 — @averysblog — @pedrostories — @fleursirvart

⚠️ if anyone being tagged would like to not be, just let me know in my inbox (which you can also use to talk to me about all the appeals of Joel Miller with his hair slicked back. Just saying hehe.

#usernexusnyx #joel miller imagine #joel miller fic #joel miller fanfic #joel miller one shot #joel miller fluff #joel miller smut #joel miller fanfiction #joel miller x f!reader #joel miller x reader #joel miller x y/n #joel miller x you #joel miller self insert #pedro pascal fanfiction #pedro pascal fic #pedro pascal smut #pedro pascal x y/n #pedro pascal x reader #pedro pascal x you

[churipu]

PERIOD COMFORT 𓆝 ⋆｡𖦹°‧

ִ ࣪𖤐 featuring. gojo satoru, itadori yuuji, nanami kento

ִ ࣪𖤐 warnings. period stuff, cramps, fluff.

note. new layout :> anyways, just reminding everyone that has sent in requests that my ask is only open to talk as of now and it will take a little long to have them out, but i assure you that everything in my inbox will be written! thank you

𝐆𝐎𝐉𝐎 𝐒𝐀𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐔

gojo didn't know how periods felt. so he looks up for things he could do to make you feel better — one time he actually considered buying one of the period cramps simulation machines because he didn't like seeing you in pain alone.

keyword: considered.

you had to drop the machine out of his trolley, and the male was definitely not happy about it. he tried arguing about it with you, saying how he's your 4lifer and he doesn't like seeing you in pain alone because of period cramps.

"satoru, 'm okay. i go through this every month, 'm not gonna die because of this." you tell him, handing his phone back.

gojo whines out, "but baby, i don't like seeing you in pain. i wanna be in pain with you," he shakes you back and forth gently.

but when you were content with your choice — he accepted begrudgingly. pouting out, refusing to speak to you for at least the next fifteen minutes because he couldn't stand being apart from you that long. so instead, he searched for what he could do to help.

"look, i got three chocolates, and i got you extra pads and tampons because tiktok told me to. and i got salonpas because i heard they can actually help with cramps," gojo presented proudly, "and then lastly, me. your amazing boyfriend."

you, previously, laying down on the couch, sat up slowly with a small smile at his attempt to help you with your period.

"thank you 'toru. this means a lot to me."

"i still think i should buy that machine though, baby."

𝐈𝐓𝐀𝐃𝐎𝐑𝐈 𝐘𝐔𝐔𝐉𝐈

he's confused. he knows about periods, but he didn't know it pained you. the young male was in a training session one morning when you called him, expecting a cheery greeting from you.

oh, he didn't. instead here you were, moaning out in pain, "yuuji, you busy?" he could vaguely make out a sharp hiss from the other line.

yuuji was indeed busy. but he told you, "no, no. are you okay? what happened?" he was in the middle of a hand-to-hand with megumi, instinctively raising his hand to stop — and megumi stopped immediately, knowing it was important for yuuji.

"period cramps . . . can you come over, please?" he was confused, tired, and sweaty. but he didn't care about that — the male was worried because were periods even supposed to hurt you?

"of course, baby. i'll be there in a sec." he ended the call and shot a look to kugisaki, "what the hell does period cramps mean, does your . . . you know, hurt or something?"

kugisaki had to give him a one minute lecture on what he should do, step by step. yuuji listened thoroughly, running to the nearest convenience store to get what kugisaki told him to: sweets, chocolates, pads and tampons, and your favorite snacks.

and it took him no longer than eight minutes to appear at your doorstep, knocking a couple of times. still sweaty and stinky, "y/n? it's me."

"door's unlocked."

he opened the door hastily, making sure not to drop any of the things he just bought. lightly sending a kick to the door to shut it, "hi baby, how are you feeling?"

"not good. i feel like 'm gonna die." you writhe out, curling into a ball on your bed. the male approached you, putting down the things, "you stink."

he chuckled, stroking your head, "'m gonna borrow your shower, and then cuddles?"

you nod, "please."

𝐍𝐀𝐍𝐀𝐌𝐈 𝐊𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐎

nanami is always ready. he just knows when your period is coming, hell, he's even more accurate than your period tracker application.

"i brought you chocolates and ice cream, and a heat pad for your cramps." nanami mumbles out, kicking his shoes off as he enters your house carrying a plastic bag.

"how did you know it was my period?"

"i remember it," that was better than any "i love you" or "i miss you".

the male's always ready to bring snacks, sweets, and heat pads for you. nanami will do what it takes to cease your period cramps since he knew he couldn't feel it like you did. he feels really awful: giving you back massages, head massages, kisses to your stomach.

he said he'd "kiss the pain better".

which actually works.

i think he knows your period schedule better than you do. he'd always remind you that your period's coming soon as a heads up, and you listen to him all the time. to the point you had to delete your application since it was pretty useless at this point.

"darling, your period's coming up soon."

"really? didn't i just finish last month's . . ?" you mumbled, a little annoyed that your schedule's coming up so fast.

"in a few days, if i'm guessing — three maybe?" he replies, pressing a kiss to the crown of your head.

© CHURIPU 2024 , DO NOT COPY OR REPOST ANYWHERE

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