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tuiyla · 1 year

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oh no, I didn't watch Legend of Korra while it aired! I binge watched the four seasons in 2018 or 2019 (and yeah I did start watching the show because of Korrasami in particular), but I did watch most of Glee (from season three onwards) and Adventure Time (I remember Olivia Olson confirming that Marcy and PB used to date was what made me want to watch all of the episodes and be a lurker in the AT fandom way back in 2014 lol) while they aired. So my experience with Bubbline kind of resembles yours with Korrasami, especially the excitement over them becoming canon (I read many of your Bubbline analyses around the same time you posted them, for instance, and happened to find your blog again bc I'm currently rewatching Glee and was looking for Brittana and Faberry content). I also wish Bubbline was more often praised by media outlets too; Rebecca Sugar planted the seeds for it way back in 2011 with "What Was Missing", after all, before either LoK or SU began. I think they probably aren't given enough credit bc of (as you pointed out) timing (Bubbline only became canon at the very end of the show in 2018, while LoK made Korrasami canon in 2014 and SU had canonically queer characters ever since the s1 finale iirc) and bc neither PB nor Marcy were the show's leads and also who knows if the AT writers would've made their romantic relationship canon if SU and LoK hadn't happened (they certainly wouldn't have back in 2012, as the Mathematical controversy shows). And yeah, you're right that having expectations about Korrasami vs. interacting with the fandom and dissecting each of their scenes weekly really is a world of difference. That said, I'm still curious as to why you thought Korrasami were more well-developed than Bubbline? I mean, Bubbline received so many episodes solely about their relationship spanning over multiple seasons (and I know you know this ofc, you're a Bubbline expert), it's hard for me to see how Korrasami could compare (I remember I thought Korrasami was underdeveloped because Asami herself didn't get a lot of screentime, so idk if her being with Korra for 90% of her scenes in Book 3 would mean all that much (sorry!!), especially bc it felt to me that they really dropped the ball with them afterwards in Book 4. However, I only watched that show once; your review was interesting and made me want to rewatch it). So yeah, I'm asking why you thought Korrasami were more well-developed than Bubbline bc iirc you said you have a media studies degree at some point, so I think you have an interesting perspective that goes beyond personal preference.

Oh happy days, turns out you and I go way back Anon haha. That’s kind of a nice full circle then. Before Glee took over this blog Bubbline was the most I was ever asked about. I wonder if you remember that I declared them canon post-Stakes in 2015? Obviously no worries if not it’s just a fun thing for me to remember because I was the most fucking vindicated person ever in September of 2018 for that very reason.

I do indeed have a media studies degree (Media, Culture and Journalism uwu), something I often forget about lol and though I appreciate the credence you put in that I’m not sure that makes my perspective any more valuable, to be honest. If anything, I’d use that degree to further argue that it does come down to personal preference. I’ll always place Korrasami just a little bit higher and I have no intention of stopping you from placing Bubbline higher. I will get into some, let’s say, more media studies perspectives here but ultimately, like I said in the prev post even picking a more well-developed relationship is subjective. Do I have reasons informed by my £8,000 student loan, sure, but it’s also the emotional bias of Avatar meaning what it does to me and Korrasami meaning what they do me. Fun little side note before jumping in, but literally days before Adventure Time’s finale aired I actually wrote an article for a series talking first queer TV experiences. In that piece, I hailed both Bubbline and Korrasami as the two first instances of real, meaningful queer rep I saw on TV. I credited Bubbline as something that kickstarted not only this golden TV trend but my own journey, and Korrasami as something that gave me, personally, that final push towards coming out. Okay, side quest over.

So first off I need to acknowledge that this: “Asami herself didn't get a lot of screentime, so idk if her being with Korra for 90% of her scenes in Book 3 would mean all that much“ is kind of misconstruing what I said or at least taking only half of it. Asami’s character is admittedly one of the less developed aspects of all of LoK, but reading my original point I’ve also said that Korra, the main character who spends time with everyone and is focused on for the majority of the show, also spends more than half her screentime with Asami in Book 3. And that’s not insignificant. Again, don’t remember the exact numbers and fuck if I can find that post 8 and a half years later (😱) but the sheer volume of it. That screentime isn’t for nothing, either, as the two go from tentatively discussing past relationships with Mako to Asami symbolically taking a similar place next to Korra that Katara did to Aang. Or, in the same series and season, P’Li to Zaheer. Here is where I would advise watching the series again because holy shit how can you only watch LoK once?? Sorry that’s not a serious note I’m just incapable of not living in a world where I’ve seen ATLA ~15 times and LoK... ~7? Eight. Maybe nine or ten honestly who knows oh what’s that time for another rewatch?

Another imperfection of LoK I have to admit is the time jump’s effect on events. No one was more wary of a time jump happening in-between seasons than me and overall, I think it was not only the right shout executed well. That said, the comics canonize that this largely off-screen period was when both Korra and Asami realized they had feelings for each other and so the transition from Book 3′s best gal pals hastag friends forever to Book 4′s romantic undertones isn’t the smoothest. I think the signs are there, particularly in Reunion, but this is an area where Korrasami could have done better. Additionally, as mentioned the show does not give Asami her dues and her moments tend to be understated, her development very internal, a lowkey journey in a world full of exploding spirit beams and mountains literally moved. There’s a beauty in that but an understated beauty where the audience is required to put in the work. Contrasted with Korra, the actual centre of her show and when put together to form a joint development, it doesn’t do the most it could, had Asami been a bigger presence throughout the show. Love my girl, I continue putting her in my top 5, but her overall lack of focus in the show was to Korrasami’s detriment. That said, I’d still push back against what you said because Asami spending the majority of her screentime with Korra does mean much, even if she doesn’t have all that much screentime to begin with. We’re still talking about a major character whose character arc in the entire second half of the show is intertwined with that of Korra’s. Again, not insignificant.

The reason I started off with where LoK is lacking in this regard is to point out that Bubbline is plagued by the same curse of relying on off-screen development. As you yourself stated, Marcy and Bonnie weren’t the leads in their show, unlike Korra being the eponymous character and Asami growing form tertiary character to deuteragonist-adjacent levels. Their disadvantage comes from a combination of this overall placement in the series’ character hierarchy, Adventure Time’s general structure and, I’d argue, the timeline of their relationship. Which is where I promise what I just said about off-screen development will become relevant. First the two points about character hierarchy and series structure because they’re intertwined. Bubbline did have episodes focused entirely or almost entirely on their relationship as a perk of the AT structure but the downside of that is that these were 10 minute chunks every three years or so. AT is mostly Finn and Jake running around and having fun and whole the show does get deep as early as season 2 and evolves beyond its two main characters, Marceline in particular was in very few episodes compared to the overall scope of literally hundreds of episodes. This means that when she does appear, when they do have substantial roles with PB it is significant, yes, but that time in-between passes in-universe as much as it does in the real world. This is most notable after their reconciliation. I think the arc from What Was Missing through Sky Witch and into Varmints is done well and we can see how they gradually rebuilt... whatever it was they had. (Distant Lands makes their past relationship and breakup explicit, but we’re not considering that retroactive confirmation for the purposes of this.)

It just feels strange to compare that, essentially a three-episode arc told over the course of, jesus, 4 years(!) to how Korrasami had Books 3 and 4 to develop. It’s just so apples and oranges. Jfc, thinking about it the three episodes I mentioned are essentially a trilogy but it took AT four years?? Insanity. Anyway, like LoK had its challenges I think AT did too in its structure. Even if we overlook that, to see this Bubbline trilogy for what it was in terms of their reconciliation the audience had to a) remember and b) infer a lot, post-Stakes PB and Marcy fulfill different roles in the story. Used to be, in Marceline’s case, that she appeared rarely but when she did she was the focus. After season 4 or so, PB’s appearances were also less frequent compared to her earlier run but more significant. After Stakes I feel like there’s a shift where they hang around more but are often designated to the background even Marceline. And save for Broke His Crown, the “meet the surrogate dad” episode, which came very shortly after Stakes, there are no more Bubbline Episodes™ until Distant Lands watered my crops with Obsidian (which I’m not over, btw). Meaning, Bubbline-centric episodes are all about the reconciliation and even though I declared that they became canon in Stakes, there’s little actual focus on and therefore development for them later on. And again, apples and oranges, hard to compare to Korrasami’s gradual but more constant-feeling development over two seasons compared to a bazillion but it just doesn’t feel more substantial.

And, the off-screenness of it all. The fact that Bubbline were implied, subtextually, to have been an item before (subtext no more obvious than Korrasami’s) so their story is fundamentally different. We don’t see them meet and develop feelings for the first time, we essentially see the get back together. That’s an entirely different dynamic where so much of their story happened hundreds of years before Finn was even born. Again, Distant Lands shows some of that but at that point they’re already a couple again and we’re not looking for further development of the past. (It’s welcome, I eat it up, if just doesn’t contribute to development re: becoming a couple.) There’s so much unsaid and people like me did infer it but there were those gaps occasional episodes every third season maybe filled out. It’s so different from following the journey of the main character and another major one from her established group of friends. And even after Stakes, which is what I consider them getting back together but is never explicitly confirmed, things happen off-screen. Case in point, who’s to say Stakes is actually when they restart a romantic relationship! Literally just me, internet rando. These more focused episodes we get before Stakes are great, but they carry a lot and imply gradual development in-between. Meaning things had to happen off-screen and we have to try and imagine certain dots to connect, so not too dissimilar from what Korrasami requires to truly buy their story.

I don’t think this is necessarily a bad thing, though I would have wanted much more Bubbline post-Stakes. I just think we see what we want to see, and I wanted to see both Bubbline and Korrasami. I inferred and connected those dots for both as I followed the two series as they aired, and I don’t think watching LoK years later, knowing the finale, people do that. Or watching AT years later, even just the Bubbline eps, knowing the finale, people do that. It’s just in the nature we consume media and why binging is... an interesting topic. Off-screen events implicitly require for you to take that time away from the text, consider what might be happening in the meantime, and get back into the flow willing to accept that some time has passed. And with LoK’s structure, even with the time jump, I think this is easier to accept them with AT’s. And with Korrasami’s arc happening almost entirely on-screen and getting to follow from the very beginning, as opposed to Bubbline having these long-ass lives and tumutous past that’s mainly only hinted at. It still works, obviously, I still love it, but LoK feels more like tangible development to me. On the note of AT’s difference in structure, there’s a lot AT implies and leaves up for interpretation, that’s just the kind of show it is. But in terms of developing a Sapphic relationship in Western animation at a time where that was Super not allowed (as opposed to now, when it Kinda is), it’s just not the best combo.

The emotional investment I gave Korrasami was there with Bubbline as well, of course, and I was more than willing to connect those dots and imagine them and just do everything. As you know, seeing as you read those posts back then. And this is still subjective, but if we’re talking actual on-screen development than Korrasami’s reading between the lines as opposed to Bubbline’s annual breadcrumbs just felt better handled and certainly better paced. It’s a difference between the series themselves but a difference nonetheless. And yeah, having so much of their story happen off-screen just didn’t do Bubbline many favours in this regard. LoK’s approach feels more hands on, more continuous, more tangibly traceable whereas with AT and Bubbline we were dropped down in the middle of the rode, at the lowest point at that, were told to guess what the history was and then hopscotched our way to the conclusion. It worked, I loved every second of it, I went feral with every single Bubbline moment, but they were few and far between comparatively.

Again, as a final note: I’m not going to convince you nor do I want to. I hope you’re not looking to be convinced about Korrasami here because I can’t transfer my own emotional bias. Sounds like you’ve read a lot of what I’ve written on this blog so I hope you know I mean this in the nicest way, but I frankly don’t have the bandwidth to be debating Korrasami’s development. Obviously you’re not questioning their validity but in the aftermath of LoK ending I had to fight for that validity a lot and it was of my own free will but it took a lot out of me. Arguing for Korrasami well-written-ness is just not something I really, truly want to put my media studies degree behind because I had to fight those fights before I had that degree and in such hostile environments and I’m just tired. Been in the trenches, one might say. I just wanna enjoy my favourite ship of all time without justifying it, you know? And again, I mean this in the nicest way possible and I wouldn’t have engaged with either of your asks if I had thought they were mal-intentioned in any way whatsoever. I appreciate you asking these questions and engaging in a convo and it’s really good to hear that you’ve come full circle with my blog, from Bubbline to Brittana. I’d be happy to talk more about any of these couples with you, including Korrasami, I just had to make this disclaimer that I can’t argue more than I did in this post for their development. In particular, not against Bubbline of all ships haha, I inadvertently feel like I’m putting down something I also deeply, deeply love when viewed in contrast with Korrasami.

Did I just rank Bubbline below Korrasami again today, yeah. And I would say that, in whatever almighty metric “development” is, Bubbline has less just by virtue of not being the main focus of their show and much of their relationship happening off-screen. But I really feel like these distinctions are meaningless when both ships mean the world to me, and I wouldn’t normally be thinking about which one I value more if not for rankings on tumblr dot com. Even with everything I said “against” Bubbline when stating my case, I still go batshit insane for them because they’re a ridiculously good duo of two characters who are already well-rounded with deep lores individually. And together? My gosh. Empires have fallen for less.

#between the kind of media attention korrasami garnered and running an avatar fan site as lok aired #i've heard it all about korrasami and i just wanna enjoy my fav red and blue bi girs and their love #the middle got away form me because i had dinner ashjkjsk #idk i was gonna say more about this elusive offscreenness but i think you get it and i'm not in the business of convincing anyway #anon #avatar asks #at asks #should i like go back and tag those old bubbline asks hmm #korrasami #bubbline #at times it really feels like i'm dragging at and bubbline i'm really not lol #i go INSANE over how excellent that show and that relationship is #it's wild

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butteryunlikelylady · 4 months

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Okay well since I can’t find my OWN POST I have to post screenshots of it that I luckily took. I want to note the progress I’ve made so far on these guidelines I set for myself.

🖤 My dating apps have been paused and I haven’t unpaused them 🙏🏾 no urge to

🖤 I find that I don’t have that “maybe I will find romance today” feeling every time I leave the house. Maybe it’s me being numb to life rn but I just go about my day and mind my business and I’m not falling hopelessly in love with any man I speak to throughout my day or daydreaming endlessly about love anymore. Ofc I dream about romantic love but I recognize I don’t really want it rn or need it. Fuck men

🖤 I have been journaling more although I could try to be more consistent with it

🖤 I meditated for like 2 nights then fell off lol. I am kind of failing at this, at letting my mind wander, but I’ve also been super busy with my pt job, not much time to just sit and stare at the wall

🖤 I still need to work on sharing less at work but I’ve made it a point to not share what I’m doing when I take time off. ✌🏾

🖤 I have definitely fallen short in the scrolling less department. Much to be desired here…

🖤 I haven’t had much time lately to watch television but when I did, I tried to be fully present (as opposed to watching and scrolling) and watched however many episodes I wanted

🖤 I’ve certainly been reading more consistently. Even if it’s not 10 pages every night, I might get 5-7 pages in, but at least I’m reading instead of scrolling before bed

🖤 I did secure a second part time job!! It’s only seasonal, which may be a blessing, but hopefully the paychecks will be worth it. I’m tired 😪

🖤 can confirm I’ve taken a short day trip recently. And planning to visit a friend in Boston in January. We’re going places 🚗

🖤 definitely did daily walks when I had the time, now I get my steps in at my pt job 🥲 I haven’t properly been outside in a little while

🖤 always love connecting with and making time for my friends. Had my weekly wine night with a friend last night!!

🖤 my spending habits haven’t changed too much but I am trying to give myself what I want especially if it’s a seriously reasonable desire (like getting pizza last night or scheduling a blowout bc I felt pretty when my hair was straight) and I have the money for it. Life is short and I love myself, ofc I’m getting her whatever she wants (within the budget)

🖤 I am still steeped in grief and discontent but whenever a strong wave of sadness washes over me and I spend a few hours crying, I notice I am mostly able to bounce out of it by the next day as opposed to weeks/months ago when I’d spend days on end having been knocked over by my feelings. I’m still grieving but I’m healing even if it doesn’t feel like it. I’m allowing each day with its feelings to move through me and trying not to judge myself based on that

🖤 I’ve been doing slightly better on speaking sweetly to myself but could 100% do more to combat negative self talk and be nice to myself

#mine #nts #work in progress #hibernation mode

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starswake--archived · 3 years

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kind of a note to self but 3/28/2018. it’s been 3 years since i started what would have been my biggest turn around in my life i think. it’s kinda wild to think that it has been 3 years since.

that first year was just all sunshine and rainbows and i know it’s because it felt like for the first time in all my life i’ve actually worked through a shitton of things that i’ve kept under wraps for a good 6-7 years by that point. i felt so free and so happy for once in my life. i still love that year so much. even if it was really rough at the beginning. i winded up meeting a lot of wonderful friends later in that year and got to spend time in a nice community for a bit and it just felt really nice.

then came the second and then the third year till present time. ever since, things have grown rockier, and i still find myself in moments when it just feels overbearing.

but 3/28/2018. if it weren’t for that day, when i had decided to begin something new, i don’t think i would have had the strength to go on. the same strength that helps me even when im really down and out of it. to rethink and challenge the self doubt that have grown and festered those good 7 years. i wouldn’t have met wonderful friends nor would i have pushed myself to just keep trying.

so i’m glad for that date. i’m glad for my “by chance” action that turned my whole life around for the better.

#dont mind me im reminiscing a bit #snow whining #note to self #(sometimes i write letters and thoughts like this when im overwhelmed so there it is)#its nothing sad! i just am? grateful? i guess?#its weird. i knew that ive past the date when things turned around for me.#but its weird to actually get the date now #but i always journal the dates and what i do ofc lol #so its nice to keep tabs...#happy thoughts

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explicitred · 2 years

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Random Genshin Headcanons - (Male Reader)

SHJSJSH I have no time to write this so this will be like a filler? Even tho I never said that I will post the swim date things in a row

Also I just thought about it, what if I make a story where I just do “a diary/journal” about our adventures while traveling with traveler?

-Childe likes to follow you around like a lost puppy in Liyue

-That means you can also assure that Zhongli will be following too

-Sometimes when you and the traveler joke about eating Paimon, you actually mean it (not traveler included)

-Kazuha seems to have a thing for grapes

-You captured all of Timmy’s pigeons in secret and put them in your Adeptal Realm

-no one found out

-Paimon has given you the title of: “Master Chef” because bad thinks your food is the best

-Kazuha likes to chill with you and say romantic poetry

(You do know what he means you just don’t know what to do lol so he keeps trying harder and harder)

-Kazuha speaks highly about you to his crew so much that the others are concerned about him

-Beidou knows who you are. After all, you did travel with the traveler to Inazuma.

-Whenever Gorou sees you, his ears pop up in delight

-If you ever see Itto, run incase you don’t want to hear him nagging about hanging out with you and playing games

-Albedo really enjoys studying you, however he will turn red if you study him instead (I just mean in science, do you need a bonk?)

-Albedo will personally invite you to his lab in Dragonspine or have Sucrose carry the message to you

-Sucrose always wonders why whenever she peeks into the lab, she sometimes sees Albedo cuddling you

-The reason why you “study” him, is so that you can study him as a homunculus

(Ofc he doesn’t actually know that’s the reason, he just thinks you’re studying his “beauty” because you told him)

-Secret private cuddles with Traveler in your Adeptal Realm

-The cuddles always have the Traveler being bright red.

I woke up at 6AM to write this because I didn’t have time yesterday. But then I realized that it wasn’t worth it for my sleep. However, I somehow managed to get this done before I had to go to school, change and no WiFi

I’ll edit this later

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merakiui · 3 years

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I was reading through your tags and you mentioned at some point the kazuscara roommates finding your onlyfans and I think I completely combusted—thus i present to you my brain rot of late: you attend the same school as them but you’re not actually friends, all you know about kazuha is that he’s the friendly regular at the cafe you work at, who makes polite conversation every now and then but otherwise is nothing of note. In reality he’s been stalking you for weeks ever since your first encounter, and is dead set on the idea that you’re this innocent, weak thing that needs to be protected (maybe he stepped in when you had a bad customer and your meek reply helped fester his delusions?). Scara, on the other hand, is only aware of your presence since you’re his favourite cam model that he recently found. (Since he’s a harbinger he’s probs loaded) Weeks of funnelling money towards you cause him to feel this unwarranted possessiveness, believing that since he’s been providing so much in your “relationship” that it’s time you reward him in turn. However, despite the unbridled interest they have toward you neither are aware of each other’s feelings for you— that is, until you happen to run into the both of them heading to your class. While both are known for maintaining their stoic masks, they’re friends for a reason— and instantly can tell the attraction their roommates have towards their own “lover”. After kazuha finds your onlyfans he’s certain that you’ve been coerced and wants to save you, while scara thinks it’s time that he’s stopped letting other plebeians look at his possession—so, despite their initial reservations, come together to form the ideal plan. When you find yourself waking up groggy in a room you don’t recognize, all they can do is look on with glee whilst planning their next course of action with their new belonging. They’re friends after all, and good friends share though, don’t they?

This is v long srry lol you can ignore this ofc!!

AAAH, ANON!! YES!!! <3 I couldn’t resist writing more on this concept. orz They make for such a terrifying pair when they work together!

(cw: yandere, stalking, nsfw, implied kidnapping/drugging, unhealthy behaviors/relationship, delusional thoughts, savior complex, implied violence)

What if Kazuha and Scara were just acquainted with one another and actually became closer through their mutual obsession with you? Yes, they’re roommates and ought to get along because they’re living together but they haven’t exactly clicked yet. They talk every now and then and know little things about each other. Nothing too special. They don’t really hang out outside of their dorm either, what with their class schedules being vastly different. And Kazuha’s always out of the dorm doing who-knows-what. Most of his time is spent at a café, where he’ll write and read and stare at you while you work. On the other hand, Scara prefers to stay inside if he doesn’t have a good reason to go out. He likes his alone time. Although he has enjoyed going to the library every now and then to study.

So maybe they need to find some common ground. Maybe they need a push in the right direction before they get closer.

Kazuha likes to stare. Talking to you is great, but he worries he’ll say too much and then he’ll be a nuisance, or you might not want to talk to him at all since you’re working. But you always regard him with a warm smile, happy to scribble his name on the plastic cup because you remember him. Because you recognize his familiar face and soft, gentle eyes. He’s the one who saved you from that rude customer, after all, and he’s a polite regular. Why wouldn’t you know him? You might look like you can handle those types of situations, but what Kazuha saw that day was something entirely different. You were nervous—so soft-spoken and scared. He absolutely has to protect you from those kinds of people now, doesn’t he?

And he does exactly that. He’s your second pair of eyes—your valiant knight in shining armor—who sees and hears all. Sometimes he goes to the café with the intention to simply watch over you and make sure no one’s bothering you. He can recall one time when a customer was speaking rudely about you because her drink hadn’t been prepared in a ‘timely manner.’ In reality it’s impossible to make a drink within a few seconds, especially when you’re already preoccupied with making another customer’s drink. She must’ve woken up on the wrong side of the bed, or maybe she’s just a hateful person in general. You didn’t deserve to be on the receiving end of such fiery insults, though.

Her eyes just can’t see your perfection and therefore she does not deserve to see out of them.

Kazuha’s willing to wrestle with all of this darkness if it means you’ll stay safe, oblivious, and pure. You’re like a defenseless kitten, unable to protect yourself from the scary world. He writes about you a lot in his journal; you’re his muse—someone who constantly shows up in poems and short paragraphs where he tries to describe what your dream date might be or what type of wedding you’d prefer. Things get darker the deeper you delve into his writings, where you’ll find entries in great detail. Kazuha writes a lot and he doesn’t even mean to. He just has to get all of his thoughts on paper before they abandon him and he’s left with emptiness.

Everything you do is pure; you’re almost an equivalent to a holy being. Your smell is pure. Your body is pure. Your actions are pure. Your smile is pure. Even when you’re on the verge of crying from harsh customers or when you’re turning down a confession, you’re still pure. And Kazuha likes that about you because it’s special. There aren’t many people in his life who are completely pure. He’s been through a lot of rough things and has seen firsthand how impure people can be. It’s only fair that he gets a chance to protect purity itself.

He might have some impurities, but that doesn’t deter him from watching over you. As gentle and unassuming as he is, there are times when even he loses his composure. Not many are privy to these dark emotions of his. His smiles are sharp and venomous and his eyes fill with a gloom so dark it can swallow you whole. You’ll never see this side of him; he won’t allow it. Instead you’re treated to his sweet, calm side, where he feigns perfection in hopes of catching your interest.

As for Scara… He doesn’t really care about Kazuha in the beginning. He’s just someone he has to live with. It’s not a big deal and as long as he doesn’t try to make lots of pointless conversation everything will be okay. He prefers the peace and quiet, considering he’s acquainted with people who are far from peaceful and quiet. Scara’s relieved that Kazuha leaves the dorm so often because it gives him an opportunity to watch his favorite cam star’s most recent video. He’s your most loyal follower—someone who’s paid lots of money just to have access to the highest tier of rewards and such. He even got a private video where you addressed him and moaned out his name with lustful thoughts of him. Having lots of money comes in handy.

When he finds out that you go to the same school as him, he’s a little shocked. He didn’t expect you to be so close. You’re practically within touching distance. If only he knew your schedule. If only you were in one of his classes. It’s really annoying that he only knows your online presence and not who you might be in your personal life. The last thing he’s going to do is consult Childe, that popular athlete who knows literally everyone in the school for whatever reason. Surely he knows you. But he’ll die before he ever asks Childe for a favor.

Scara loves you out of every other cam model because you’re different. You’re not just trying to get fast cash. You’re genuine. You listen to your subscribers and their feedback. You do your best to improve and do even better streams than the previous ones. All of your hard work is overlooked by the other fools who watch your streams, but it isn’t overlooked by him. Scara appreciates your attention to detail and the way you’re able to hook him with your breathless voice alone. You’re very skilled at what you do, so it’s only fair you get paid for it.

But buying your services isn’t enough. It’s not a real relationship, but it certainly feels like it when he buys preferential treatment. Private shows, special requests, odd favors—you do it all because he pays for it. But this relationship isn’t going to be one-sided forever. You’ll have to pay him back in full eventually. Scara likes to think he has patience and that waiting is fine. It gives him more time to plan his next move—to figure out what he should do to finally have you all to himself. So that those private shows he watches through a screen can finally be real.

Scara finds the journal sitting innocently on Kazuha’s bed, its maroon cover and maple leaves pulling at his curiosity. He might not know everything about Kazuha, but he’d recognize this journal anywhere. His roommate almost always has it on his person. Scara wouldn’t be surprised if he slept with it. To say he’s curious would be absolutely correct. He can only wonder what Kazuha writes in that thing. Perhaps it’s just notes for a class. That’s what anyone would think, right?

Scara opens it and flips through the first few pages. They’re normal for the most part. Just a bunch of haikus and other useless scribbles. When he skips over some pages, he starts to find things that are far more interesting than poetry and doodles of cats. He finds the majority of the journal is comprised of information. More specifically, there are facts and other knowledge about you—the cam model he’s been obsessed with ever since he stumbled upon your onlyfans. He reads through as much of the journal as he can and instantly learns so much: your address, your roommate, your workplace, your friends’ names, names of any potential exes. The list goes on and on.

Scara doesn’t have anything against Kazuha. His first impression of him wasn’t anything groundbreaking. He thought he was a pushover at first. But now that he knows what this journal holds… Well, it sheds an entirely new light on his roommate.

Just days before Scara took a peek inside his journal, Kazuha discovers your secret online life. He snoops through Scara’s laptop when he steps out, having left it open and unlocked. He’s just trying to find what could have caught Scara’s interest, as he’s almost always glued to his laptop on specific days at specific times, with his headphones on and his gaze unyielding. He doesn’t intend to find the file of one of your private videos—something that was meant only for Scara’s eyes.

He clicks on the video out of interest. He’s not sure what he was expecting to see, but it definitely wasn’t this. Kazuha sits there and stares at the sight before him. You’re dressed in skimpy lingerie and you’re muttering the dirtiest things while coating your fingers in lube. And your hands are stroking a thick toy and you’re addressing Scara and you’re lining it up to your hole and— He shuts the laptop before it can get even more explicit than it already is. He’s so conflicted, fraught with a betrayal so strong it weighs his heart down.

Why would he have this sort of video on his laptop? Did you give it to him? Did he make you do this? Are you in danger? Are you still pure?

Kazuha can’t kill on campus. It’s way too risky and he’d be one of the first suspects if Scara’s body is found. Besides, it’s not like he has the full story. He doesn’t know whether or not Scara’s done something that’s worthy of death. You could just be in a tight spot. He knows how easily you give in when you’re under pressure. Maybe you’re just doing this because you feel like it’s the only thing you can do. Not to worry; Kazuha will save you before Scara can ruin your purity with his twisted fantasies.

They confront each other when the time feels right. Kazuha struggles to keep a smile plastered to his face for the sake of politeness, while Scara holds in his raging temper so that he can bear some semblance of cooperation. Neither of them is happy to hear that the other went through their stuff, but they force themselves to make up because a more pressing issue is at hand: their connection to you.

Kazuha says he’s your secret admirer. Scara says he’s in a relationship with you. There’s no way you’d ever date someone like Scara—Kazuha knows this for a fact. Yet he falters at the confidence in Scara’s tone. That can’t be the truth, right? Despite this, Kazuha still strikes up an offer: If they work together to get what they both want, they’ll be unstoppable. With Scara’s riches and his influence and Kazuha’s charisma and clever thinking, they can easily get their hands on you. Of course this means they’ll have to share, but it’s not a big deal when they’re already in so deep. They both know the other’s secret; now they’re swearing to keep it in the pursuit of having you all to themselves. And luckily Scara agrees to the deal, but that doesn’t give Kazuha a reason to lower his guard.

However despite how well they work together when it comes to planning the kidnapping and actually executing it, they both have their own reasons for wanting you. Scara wishes to make his relationship with you a reality—to toss aside the screen that once held him back and finally do all of the things he could only do in his dreams. Kazuha seeks to protect your fragile heart, lest you crumble under Scara’s intense way of doing things and cling to him for salvation. You can’t do those sorts of things with Scara; he won’t allow it. Your purity is meant for him and no one else.

But sharing is caring and some have to learn that the hard way. It definitely brings Kazuha and Scara closer together, even if neither of them will admit it. If they look past their desires, they can be friends. And soon enough they’ll have to accept this new friendship if they want to avoid any unnecessary complications.

However there are times when they’ll cooperate in order to do things with you. They’re a packaged deal you can’t get rid of.

#chit chat #yandere #yandere kazuha #yandere scaramouche #kazuscara roommates #ty for feeding me anon orz #i like the idea of them being friends on the surface #but beneath that they're willing to abandon the other in order to meet their desires #but when they come together they're a force to be reckoned with #aaah i could go on and on with this concept #but i don't want to ramble #ANYWAYS TY AGAIN ANON <3 YOUR BRAIN IS SO LARGE #🧸 anon

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fairycosmos · 2 years

Note

chloe <3 a couple months ago i confessed a crush to a rly good friend and she very politely turned me down but it still really hurts. i convinced myself it was mutual bc she was always telling me how beautiful i am and that i could have anyone i want (lol). we’re fine now but it sucks to see her date ugly tinder boys 😭 i just wish i could fastforward to the part when i’m not sad abt it anymore !! thanks for having ur askbox open to listen <3

aghhhhh…..physically felt my heart crumble a little at this 😭 especially the ugly tinder boy part……HELL. im sorry, love. the whole situation is fucking shit. it’s hard being a girl who likes girls because we’re so affectionate with each other in a platonic way nd it can be so easy to misread and get ur hopes up nd it’s the worst kind of painnn :( unfortunately you have to feel it nd feel it for a while in order to eventually be able to let it go, you know? and it’s alright to let it wash over u over and over - the sadness, the disappointment, the anger - allow it. it’s completely normal and to be expected after something like this. i know it’s hard, but letting it build up inside you hurts more. if you need to cry, vent, journal, eat ur feelings lol - give urself the space and the understanding to do so. you’ll start healing in microscopic ways the moment you accept that it sucks and that you’re upset. you can do all of this while still acknowledging and being grateful for the fact that you guys r still friends and that you still get to love her and enjoy her presence in ur life. someday you’ll be able to focus on that more than the What ifs/what could’ve been. the fact is you deserve reciprocation and if she’s not the person whose going to give you that then chances are there’s someone whose a way better match for you out there anyway. ofc it feels bad knowing that right now because it’s not her and she’s the one you want, but im saying that happiness and that love you envisioned is still a possibility nd it’s still waiting for u. ahh :( again im sorry love. you have to find a good heartbreak playlist and give urself a bit of tlc. it’s only natural to feel crappy for a while, but it’s not a permanent state of being at all. each day is a step towards moving on from the whole thing, even if it doesn’t feel like it. sending a huge hug x

#anon #my friends always getting with dating app creeps and i don’t even luv her like that n it gets to me lol. they’re so weird. the guys i mean

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misterfatcakes · 3 years

Text

tagged by the wonderful and ever-beloved @vague-omen tysm!!

Rules: answer 30 questions and tag 20 people you’d like to get to know better!

1. name: Jonathan, or Jon for short.

2. gender: uhhh nb transmasc

3. sign: gemini

4. height: taller than nyx @patheticnyas :-)

5. time: like the time currently? 10:30pm

6. birthday: June 17th!

7. favorite band/s: maiden names, uhhh brown bird, mcr and mother mother (for obvious reasons), left at london

8. favorite solo artist/s: elijah press, penelope scott, owl city bc he's just one guy...

9. song stuck in my head: uhhhh both 3 musketeers by trapbunnybubbles and bby ur a haunted house... simultaneous

10. last movie i watched: my housemates have on movies all the time but the last one I payed attention to was the seasonal rewatch of nightmare before christmas

11. last show i watched: im rewatching bnha with nyx, as you can see from my art blog lol

12. when did i make this blog: this one is a 2015 rebrand- my original was mrfatcakes (or mr-fatcakes? I don't remember) back in 2011 or 2012

13. what do i post: I have no fucking idea should I scroll thru my blog and check? I mostly just reblog if it's something I want one of my followers to see or if I have something to say in the tags

14. last thing i googled: how old is my tumblr, on account of question 12.

15. any sideblogs: uhh yeah my active ones are @misterfatcakes-art for my art, @liminaldirt for like. edgy and autumnal shit. and @refur-ants is where I reblog reference posts to so they don't clog up my likes!

16. do i get asks: no bc apparently my inbox is closed?? and I can't figure out how to open it back up bc I never closed it and it said it was open when I checked?? I tried closing it and opening it back up again but idk if it worked

17. why i chose this url: when I was really little my older sibling would start their diary entries with "dear fatcakes,". they told me they had the patent for the phrase, but I wanted to be just like them, so I started one that I would address "mr. fatcakes", as a means of circumventing their patent. I thought I was a very clever 9 year old at the time. then when I made my first tumblr I thought blogging=journaling so I gave it the same name. I never bothered trying to come up with anything else.

18. following: 34, tho a handful of them are inactive blogs from people who moved on or passed away, who I'm still following for sentimental reasons.

19. followers: 412 but like. most of them are inactives from my hamilton phase I think??

20. average hours of sleep: uhh I think it averages out to like 4 or 5 hours a night but I either sleep for ten hrs or Not at all. depends on the evening

21. lucky number: I don't really get the purpose of them but I usually pick 13 when asked bc I was an edgy kid and now it's reflex

22. do i play any instruments: uhhh I played the clarinet and guitar in middle school for band, and in my second year of high school, back when nyx and I first started dating, he taught me the basics of how to play his saxophone. I'm woefully out of practice with any of those instruments, though, you know how it goes. back in elementary school I taught myself piano, though, and I can still bang out simple tunes. I think the most complex things I still know how to play are the vocaloid songs I memorized when I was 13/14. mostly I just stick to like disney music and nursery rhymes when I'm playing bc they're easy and the ppl around me will recognize it

23. what am i wearing: just my red plaid pajama pants and a grey tank bc I was doing laundry

24. dream job: uhhh god idk. If I didn't have to worry about paying for shit the kind of work I'd actually spend my time doing.... probably making art, being a counselor/tutor for the kids who stay after school, uhhhh and sewing/mending.

25. dream trip: if I can take nyx with me, then to japan, bc they wanna visit a cat island and shop the tourist traps. otherwise?? probably travel to wherever ciara or joker or bonbon is, just to visit.

26. favorite food: meat!! I love every land meat I have tried and I like most fish. specifically when it's savory though- I can't stand like that sweet sauce ppl put on meats sometimes, or how sweet prepackaged lunch meats are. It ruins the taste and always makes me feel nauseous :-/

27. nationality: american 😔

28. favorite song/s: rn? blood of angels (ofc), frontier psychiatrist, the bidding

29. last book i read: I got in a Mood™ and reread the +anima series a few weeks ago

30. favorite fictional universe: in what way? like, I think beastars and star trek and atla and bnha and +anima have super interesting universes and lore, but like in order to narrow down the list I'd need specific criteria.

Uhh I'm tagging @bonbongiveshell @opossums-are-groovy @tsukkitani @topazpearl @shabutiee @the-ziggy-starbucks @angsty-kiefer @a-star-dusted-royal @gummirock @wandamaximahf @willsquanchforfood @9thbutterfly @agent-fangirl @grossdarling @smallscarecrow @riddlercore @taxiwormy @lovesosweet @honeyadder @hermanngottlieb

#tag meme #i paused in the middle of answering this... its 1:30am now

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lavenderlattaes · 4 years

Text

txt as high school au tropes

⇒ summary: txt in a high school au setting.

⇒ [ high school! au ]

⇒ pairing: txt x reader

⇒ word count: 2.5k words

⇒ genre: fluff

⇒ warnings: cursing, mentions of fighting, parties, making out

⇒ note: hello,, yeonjun’s cover got me so emo last night that i knew i just HAD to finish this so i can finish the bad boy au i had started writing for him sksks. Also i only had a bad boy fic planned for yeonjun, but if you guys think i should write for the other members too, please send me an ask! ignore mistakes bc im a bit of a blind bat and enjoy! ＼ʕ •ᴥ•ʔ／

choi yeonjun:

↳ the bad boy

YES.

C’mon guys, this is badboy!!!! Yeonjun!!!!

okay, so yeonjun’s definitely the leather jacket wearing, motorcycle riding kind of badboy

the one that gets into all the fights (ง’̀-‘́)ง

the one that smokes and drinks and punches his way around bc he cannot, for the life of him, control his emotions and feelings ‾͟͟͞(((ꎤˋ⁻̫ˊ)—̳͟͞͞o

he’s also hardly at school

but on the rare days that he’s actually at school, he’s always punching someone or he’s all bloodied and bruised

like,,, dude do you wanna die N O W???

the first time you met was at the nurse’s office

oh wow i wasn’t expecting that

the nurse wasn’t around but you volunteered there frequently, so you were the only one there

the door opens and you’re surprised to see someone you’re not familiar with??

he wasn’t wearing your school’s uniform,,,

who is this dude and why is he heRE

but he looked like shit and like he was gonna die

so even if he may be part of some sketchy gang

you had no choice but to patch him up pspspsps

he was covered in scratches and bruises and his lip and eyebrow were bleeding

ffs man

you told him to go sit on a bed while you went around looking for all the supplies you needed

yeonjun was being a lil shit too, bc he wouldn’t cooperate right away but eventually after threatening him that he might die if he was being choosy about who’s gonna patch him he gave in

so you started to patch him up and he was just

s t a r i n g

⊙﹏⊙

D U D E

he’s really attractive if he just wasn’t into fighting all the time y’know

girls still occasionally wanna try “breaking his badboy rep”

all that cliché stuff

you get really conscious under his gaze and then he asks for your name and you ask him what happened instead psksks

he goes (◕︵◕)

so you give him your name fAM AND HE SAYS, “I’m Choi Yeonjun”

pspspspp

and then he tells you that he’s friends with two other choi dudes who are also really well known in your school

and then it hits you

HE’S THE BADBOY EVERYONE’S TALKING ABOUT

damn y/n you’re so lost fam

lmao so he does go to your school but you’ve never seen him before????

you finally finish patching him up and you wrap his knuckles in a gauze and his arm as well

hIS ARM HAD A HUGE ASS CUT btw

“what kind of fight did you even get into?” (´･(´･(´･(´･(´･(´･д･`) ･`)･`)･`)･`)･`)

“the kind where I almost die???” (￣ω￣;)

eye-

after getting him all patched up, you take a good look at him and whew he’s all better now

he doesn’t look like he’d die any minute

then you smile at him like (✿◠‿◠)

AND HE SAYS

“I like your smile, can I call you sunshine?”

PSPSPSPSPSPSP

yeonjun’s about to leave when you’re still bothered by the large cut on his eyebrow

“Wait!”

you pull out a cute rubber ducky cartoon band-aid from your pocket and place it on top of the cut sKSKSKKS

after he finally leaves and says goodbye, yeonjun suddenly can’t stop thinking about you

and maybe, just maybe, you can’t stop thinking about him too.

choi soobin:

↳ the rich kid

okAY so remember how badboy! yeonjun was friends with 2 other chois

Well duh who would those other two be (●´ω｀●)

so soobin’s the riCH KID!!

like, he be drippin in finesse yo

(okay that was bad)

he wears gucci, channel, louis vuitton, armani, all that shit

tO SCHOOL

jk you guys had uniforms

but there’s always something expensive on him

whether it be his shoes, or his bag, or maybe a ring

AND EVERYONE LIVED FOR RICH KID CHOI SOOBIN WEARING HIS ROLEX 乂❤‿❤乂

but he isn’t exactly the friendly type (๑◕︵◕๑)

he’s the quiet one out of the three of them and he always keeps a straight face

＼| ￣ヘ￣|／

Like that ^^^^

despite having literally no emotion on his face whatsoever, his lips always seem to be upturned in a pout ksskskksks

and despite his cold personality, that doesn’t stop the girls from swooning over him lol

so,, y/n you’re a pretty clumsy simpleton

dID I JUST USE SIMPLETON

and you somehow,,, idk

the world hates u

you accidentally bump into him like really hard when he was adjusting his precious Rolex on his wrist and the collision caused his Rolex...to...fly…

basically you broke his watch.

sKSKSKSKSKSKKSKS DUDE

Y/N YOU BETTER RUN AWAY NOW FAM

and everyone that was there was like :000

And soobin is just ( •̀ω•́ )σ

And you’re ಥ_ಥ

but he just sighs, picks up his broken watch and slips it into his pocket and walks away as if nothing happened

HNGGGGG o(╥﹏╥)o

you’re so guilty that you started to come up to him everyday asking how you could repay him and if you could,,, you know,, pay for it in six months time or some shit

and after a few days soobin’s had enough of you following him around

and (￣ｰ￣)ﾉ

“can you stop annoying me? It’s an expensive watch, you can’t possibly pay for it”

wOW OKAY :///

“But i feel really bad for breaking it...( ˃̣̣̥ω˂̣̣̥ )”

so soobin decides to make you his “servant”

and you know it’s stupid ,,, just bc he’s rich as hell doesn’t mean he can treat you like that

but he wasn’t giving you any options so you had no choice

you followed him around now and well, somehow

you got to know the real choi soobin hiding under all that expensive clothing and jewelry

the choi soobin that built his walls up so high that no one saw except his other two friends

and now, you.

choi beomgyu:

↳ the heartbreaker

YES CHILDREN

THIS BOY

steals hearts left and right

or: also known as the fuckboy

skskskksksks

he slept around and girls always fell victim to his charms

aside from the fact that he was just really really good looking and handsome and gorgeous and-

he was also really friendly and funny

you’d see him at parties all the time, and sometimes with soobin and yeonjun too

there’s always a random girl on his arm too lmao

beomgyu’s never brought a girl to bed more than once before

it’s always just making out for like hours and one night stands here n there

and flings here and there

never had a serious relationship ever

and all the girls at school are fighting to be the one he decides to “do” more than once

(・_・ヾ

i mean,, who wouldn’t want to be the first girl choi beomgyu ever fucks more than ONCE

but you just can’t seem to share the same sentiment with the other girls at school

shouldn’t they be fighting over who gets to be his first serious girlfriend or sumth? the girls in your school r weird tbh

besides,, you’re too busy looking for new memes or something and aren’t fuckboys supposed to be the type to do one night stands anyway???

but you know, you’re the mc in this world y/n

and you caught beomgyu’s eye bc he’s always noticed you on your phone laughing at something or bopping your head to some cool new song

he can’t stop smiling every time he sees you do that

BC YOU’RE JUST SO CUTE AND OMFG IS CHOI BEOMGYU CATCHING ACTUAL FEELINGS

and get this,,, beomgyu’s never been the type to be all shy and flustered bc that’s just so not him

but then you get partnered up for a project and suddenly you’re approaching his desk with a bright smile on your face and

sKSKSK heLP HIM SOMEONE P L E ASE

“hi! I’m y/n!” you extend your hand out for him and he just

ฅ(*°ω°*ฅ)

seeing beomgyu all flustered makes you giggle and he breaks out of his trance and goes back to his old self

“Hey, y/n. Let’s have a great time together(づ｡◕‿‿◕｡)づ”

so that’s how you and beomgyu become friends

even after the project ended you still hung out and you even became somewhat friends with yeonjun and soobin

you sometimes went to parties with him too

and whilst beomgyu fell deeper for you

you remained clueless as ever

you just thought it was him being friendly and stuff bc that’s what he does

what you did notice though

beomgyu hardly made out or slept with anyone at parties now

he hung out with you and played games with you and with soobin and yeonjun

and he didn’t usually go to parties now if you couldn’t make it!!!

and everyone can clearly see how much he LIKES?? LOVES?? you

so yeah, maybe beomgyu’s gotten rid of his fuckboy ways bc of you.

kang taehyun:

↳ the valedictorian

name a smarter guy in your school than kang taehyun. Go

jk never gonna happen HE’S the smartest

literally breezes through his subjects like it’s nothing

idk how it works for you guys but in my school, we don’t have GPAs and stuff but anyway

he has like, an average grade of 99 (*•̀ᴗ•́*)و ̑̑ (and that’s a 4.0 GPA right????)

PSPSPPS WHAT THE HECKITY HECK

and all the teachers love him ofc

he doesn’t have to sit in front to be THIS smart

he can sit at the back row and be all emo with choi yeonjun if he wanted to and he’d still ace a test

h o w ⊂•⊃_⊂•⊃

and not only that

he’s got a really good voice?? he’s in choir omg

no,,

he has the voice of an angel ★~(◡‿◡✿)

he hits high notes like how he breezes through his subjects

he’s the type of guy you bring home to meet your parents after one (1) date bc they’ll love him anyway

aND if he could get any more perfect,,,, he’s captain of your football team AND class president

AND I SAY WHAT

yUP

kang taehyun best boy _へ__(‾◡◝ )>

and you?

HAH

you guys are a match made in heaven

you’re his vice president, and while he’s in choir, you’re part of your school’s journalism club

plus, you’re smart enough to go against him but you like slacking off lmao

also

“you have all the glory in high school tae, i’ll kick your ass in college” PSSPPS

And if taehyun’s the captain of the football team, you’re captain of the volleyball team just bc

goals? I think so too (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

but sigh,,, yunno

as smart as taehyun is, he’s a bit dumb when it comes to matters of the heart

THIS IS THE ONLY TIME WE CAN CALL KANG TAEHYUN DUMB!! BECAUSE!! HE!! CAN’T!! SEE!! HOW!! MUCH!! YOU!! LOVE!! HIM!! (;¬_¬)

you’ve always loved him, but you realized it only when you guys won the science quiz bee the year before ⊂( ◜◒◝ )⊃

basically, you’ve loved him for more than a year now,, sigh

and you’re just trying to find the right opportunity to confess

wHEN BOOM you suddenly remembered you’re on the school paper!!!! ⌒°(❛ᴗ❛)°⌒

v-day is right around the corner and since you’re editor in chief, you decided that it would be nice to have a lil fun in preparation for the event

so you got the whole school dropping anonymous love notes for their crush!!

and the club went around pasting them on lockers for the students so they don’t risk the chance of getting caught pspsps

totally smart idea huh !(•̀ᴗ•́)و ̑̑

all for the sake of confessing your feelings for your best friend.

hueningkai:

↳ the popular guy

this boi

loved by everybody

and i mean everybody

even yeonjun and soobin who seem like they don’t give two flying fucks about anything

like literally everybody wants to be his friend !!!

there’s nothing people have to hate him for honestly

he’s in choir with taehyun

he follows no crowd bC THE CROWD FOLLOWS HIM SKSKS

“hey, kai!”

“ey, wassup! I like your top!”

(▰˘◡˘▰)

he’s a cute babie too oomf

the girls that aren’t swooning over yeonjun or beomgyu or soobin are definitely swooning over him

(with taehyun they’ve lost all hope bc they know his best friend’s the only one that’s supposed!! to!! stand!! next!! to!! him!!)

kai’s also really sweet and nice to everybody,, and i mean everybody

he talks to everyone, even those emo kids who sit at the back row

and even they can’t resist smiling :)

he’s that kind of popular guy that’s really preppy and fun to be around

he’s the type to help girls carry their books, or help guys plan on how to ask their crushes out

everyone knows a lot about him bc he doesn’t hesitate to share and talk about his life bc he literally has no trust issues whatsoever

not in a bad way, tho!! he’s just really honest n stuff

but

the one thing that everyone doesn’t know about him is that he can play piano sksk ♫꒰･◡･๑꒱

they know he can sing, but they didn’t know he played piano like???

he’s never brought it up before

but one time you find him playing the piano in the music room

you’re in the art club and you guys usually stayed behind after school to work on your paintings and stuff when you were feeling like it

and it just so happened that you were staying behind bc you entered into an art competition and you had only two weeks left to complete your painting

but lately you’ve been running out of inspiration and decided to clear your thoughts first before going back to your painting

what’s that beautiful melody???

【・_・?】

and it led you to him and you were surprised to see mr. popular in the room

(*ﾟﾛﾟ)

and you didn’t mean to, but the door was ajar and you push it open even further to hear the song better

DUMB MOVE

a chair was resting behind the door and it screeched on the floor spsps

Kai turned around and saw you

“oh! Hey y/n”

he stopped playing and you could see a faint blush on his cheeks ≧◡≦

“you play piano? i never knew” you decided to just step inside bc he wouldn’t mind right? rIGHT???

yeah,, if he didn't have such a big PHAT CRUSH ON YOU

“uh yeah, it helps me to clear my mind sometimes”

“i was taking a break too, i couldn’t finish my painting”

sKSKSK AND KAI FOUND THAT PERF OPPORTUNITY TO SPEND TIME W YOU BY OFFERING YOU HIS COMPANY TO GO AROUND

he’s always liked you, ever since you were lab partners for an entire year,,

you occasionally talked, but since he was on the more popular side and you had a smaller group of friends it was hard for him to find proper alone time with you

but life’s good to this baby and he finally got to spend his time with you.

105 notes · View notes

sxfterhearts · 4 years

Text

About Me!

thank you for the tag @prettywordsyouleft 💞 hope you’ll have a great week ahead chelle~

now for the questions!

1. It’s your birthday! What did you ask for and did you receive it?

so it was my birthday about a month ago and my friend gifted me a really pretty journal! i didn’t ask for it but it was definitely something that i wanted and i could picture myself sitting in a pretty cafe, sipping my coffee and doing some journaling in some faraway land

2. What was the last song or album you listened to?

stay gold by bts was the last song that played on my spotify!! (i have been playing it on repeat... the chorus is so satisfying) the last album is lay’s album lit (莲) :))

3. What is your go to snack when you’re hungry or bored?

whenever it’s that time of the month, chocolate (esp dark choc). i often get hungry at night so i’ll have yoghurt + granola!!

4. What is your morning routine?

these days? there is no routine LOL i’ve been on uni holidays so i just wake up.. whenever.... as in close to 12pm ahem but i’ll always brush my teeth before having breakfast (if i wake up early enough for breakfast, that is hehe)

on normal days when i have to go to uni i’ll be up around 8, wash up, pack my stuff and eat breakfast with my fam. we’ll always have the morning news on the tv as well

5. What mythical/cryptid creature would you be?

it’d be great if i could fly... so unicorn or dragon or phoenix? tbh tho i wanna be a witch if i could and do magic cos harry potter :”)

6. How do you interact with someone that you don’t like?

i’ll avoid them if it’s possible and just pretend they don’t exist.. if i really don’t have a choice, i’ll keep communications as limited as possible, perhaps just by text/online

7. How do you define a toxic person?

when the other person repeatedly fails to take into account your own feelings and wishes, always putting their own needs first. also not respecting the other person/their boundaries.

8. Have you ever been to a concert or fanmeet type of event? If not, would you want to?

i’ve been to an ed sheeran concert!! my seats were really far away tho so i couldn’t see him properly T^T

i haven’t been to any kpop concerts or fanmeets... i really wanna go to an exo concert (cos they were my youth) and ofc got7 as well (flashback to their part switches and that one fanmeet where jinyoung + yugyeom sang 1:31am omg)!! i also really really like day6′s music and i think their concert will be fantastic

9. Do you believe in astrology? Why or why not?

yup! i find astrology posts interesting and mostly read them for fun but sometimes they can describe my personality/actions/thoughts pretty accurately (the skeptic in me tells me it’s probs bc they always write general statements that apply to everyone haha)

i would also read up my zodiac’s fortune for the year during CNY, but it’s mostly inaccurate hahah

10. If you had only one sense (hearing, touch, sight, etc.), which would you want?

sight, and if i could choose a second one definitely hearing. i really enjoy music and sounds but i think not being able to see would be... devastating for me.......

11. Who is your favorite celebrity or idol?

at the moment 100% park jinyoung. this man is so fine. (him dancing to coming home in his fanmeet??? hello???? pls give me my heart back thank you)

12. If you could talk to your favorite celebrity(s) for a limited time, what would you tell them?

for got7, i want to tell them that even though i haven’t known them for long, discovering them and being their fan has made me a happier, better and more confident person. their music, their personalities and their kind words really makes a difference in soooo many people’s lives. i’m thankful for their existence, their sacrifice and their hard work. also i want to say that i will support them no matter what they choose to do in the future, whether it be retiring, or marrying the love of their life, or having children. they deserve to find their own happiness after being ours for so long.

for exo, i think there are no words to express how much of an impact they’ve made to my life (i’ve stanned for nearly 7 years now! my entire teenage years). i’ll probably just give them a big hug if i could and tell them that i’m super proud of them and that i love them. and that it will always be an honour to be their fan.

13. I’m taking you out on a date and it’s your choice. Where are we going and what are we going to do?

FOR FOOD AND BUBBLE TEA.

this is like the ideal date for me. we go try out a new restaurant and i intro you to my fav bbt place~

14. Do you like sweet or savory foods?

depends on my mood! usually savoury unless i’m craving chocolate specifically

15. Do you have any band merchandise or merchandise from any of your favorite artists? If so, what?

i’m not sure whether you guys know this but i’m a baby ahgase!! so sadly i don’t own any got7 merch :(( (i’m so tempted to buy some tho, especially hear here)

i have 5 exo albums (xoxo, growl, monster, lucky one and tempo), 2 posters in my bedroom, 1 in my study and a few more rolled up cos idk how to put them up properly!!! i also have an exo planet concert shirt~

16. (i added this question bc min tagged me ages ago but i couldn’t come up with decent ones) 3 random facts!!

my fav got7 title track is tied between eclipse and ycmn

i just read me before you and watched the movie (the book is 100 times better)

my fav videos to watch on youtube are cafe vlogs (specifically: pouring espresso on top of a cup of milk to make iced latte, ahhh satisfying)

Tagging: @mxillusion @beombam @jinyoungsir @tuangelic @defnabeom @listlessmaenads @ilytuan @defwons (the blogs that i really admire and frequently appear on my dash!! thank you all for posting and brightening up my day 🥺) + anyone who read this far and wants to do it too!

#tag #tag game #about me #get to know me #its 2am i should be asleep #good night

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downn-in-flames · 4 years

Text

let’s keep it casual

this was written for a trope stew challenge on @hpfanfictalk - my assigned tropes were 1) roaring rampage of revenge, 2) snowball lie, 3) friends with benefits, 4) it's personal, and 5) mistaken for betrayal. somehow, i think i managed to squish them all in here :P

read it on: hpft | ao3

[Tuesday 10 May, 15:04]

james potter: u up?

lily evans: it’s 3pm

james potter: good observation

lily evans: you need to get more creative with your ‘hi i’m bored can you come over and fuck me’ lines

james potter: did it work though?

lily evans: be there in 15

[Tuesday 10 May, 16:42]

sirius black: ran into lily in the lobby a few minutes ago sirius black: tell me, when are you going to finally own up to the fact that you fancy the shit out of her and aren’t just casually fucking her with no feelings involved

james potter: hmm, but see, that would require that statement to actually be true james potter: seriously, it’s just hooking up james potter: we’ve got a good thing going, i’m not going to ruin that by catching feelings

sirius black: ~catching~ feelings? sirius black: dude sirius black: feelings have long since been caught sirius black: by both of you

james potter: ur wrong but i’m not arguing that point with u anymore

sirius black: because your counterarguments are shit and you know it

[Wednesday 11 May, 20:53]

lily evans: i’m going to kill him i’m going to kill him i’m going to kill him lily evans: I’M GOING TO KILL HIM lily evans: give me ONE good reason not to commit murder right now

james potter: you can’t fuck me if you’re in prison?

lily evans: damn you have a point there

james potter: also why are you contemplating murder, that seems extreme

lily evans: two words for you: severus fucking snape

james potter: that’s three words

lily evans: do you want me to kill you too, bud??

james potter: you can’t fuck me if i’m dead james potter: but seriously, what did that greasebag do

lily evans: remember when i beat him to checking out the last copy of that chemistry research journal from the library?

james potter: i believe you described it as ‘the most victorious day of the semester to date’

lily evans: and i stand by that lily evans: but ANYWAYS lily evans: the creepy fucker SNUCK INTO MY ROOM and STOLE IT lily evans: and had the nerve to leave me a fucking LOVE NOTE in its place

james potter: he left you a love note?? james potter: what does it say?

lily evans: that is not the part of this story you should be fixating on lily evans: he wheedled his way through the front desk security and came into my room and WENT THROUGH MY STUFF lily evans: not to mention, the damn journal is still checked out in my name lily evans: so if he doesn’t return it on time, I’M going to have to pay for it lily evans: those things are expensive as FUCK

james potter: what a fucking twat

lily evans: i just lily evans: i can’t with him lily evans: the creepiness and borderline obsession with me is one thing lily evans: the fact that he acts like i owe it to him to be in love with him is another lily evans: but straight-up violating my privacy AND sabotaging my perfect reputation with the university library?? lily evans: i’m taking him down

james potter: hell yeah, you show that fucker once and for all

lily evans: wanna be my accomplice

james potter: that’s perhaps the sexiest thing you’ve ever said james potter: ofc i will be

lily evans: will text u when i come up with the appropriate revenge scheme

[Thursday 12 May, 13:02]

lily evans: meet me at the library in an hour

james potter: is this part of aforementioned revenge scheme?

lily evans: obviously

james potter: i shall be there

[Thursday 12 May, 15:23]

james potter: okay what the fuck was that

lily evans: in my defense it was not supposed to go that far

james potter: mind telling me what you DID have in mind when telling the librarian that we’re engaged?? james potter: because i’ve been wracking my brain and i’ve got nothing

lily evans: she was supposed to give me edit access to my account to fix my last name lily evans: which she did lily evans: and thanks to my BRILLIANT computer skills from there, the journal is checked out in snape’s name instead of mine lily evans: but clearly i underestimated how close i am with the uni library staff

james potter: no shit

lily evans: anyways, what do you want on our wedding registry

james potter: what

lily evans: i’ve got to give her a wedding website link!! she asked for it, i can’t very well show up at the library next week and not have a wedding website for her lily evans: i also ordered a £5 ring on etsy lily evans: it’s huge and tacky and exactly the sort of thing a trust fund baby like u would propose with

james potter: jfc james potter: put one of those mini waffle makers on there james potter: also i’m offended that you think so poorly of my ring-picking skills

[Friday 13 May, 9:10]

lily evans: hi, i have a weird request

remus lupin: that’s always a concerning sentence

lily evans: can you take fake engagement photos for me and james?? lily evans: will pay you in bourbon and chocolate

remus lupin: ……. literally what the fuck, lily remus lupin: why on earth do you need fake engagement photos

lily evans: i need them for our fake wedding website

remus lupin: somehow, that still doesn’t make this make any more sense

lily evans: it’s a long story lily evans: can you though?

remus lupin: *sigh* yes

lily evans: bless u

[Monday 16 May, 8:57]

lily evans: thoughts?? lily evans: Attachment - 12 Images

james potter: wow james potter: those look… really good

lily evans: we actually look like an engaged couple lily evans: like….. go us lily evans: alright, time to upload these bad boys onto the website

[Monday 16 May, 9:12]

james potter: sirius james potter: oh dear brother of mine james potter: who is nothing but kind and supportive and never gives me shit for anything james potter: how are you this fine evening?

sirius black: spit it out

james potter: as you know, i have been pulled into the most hare-brained of schemes with none other than lily evans james potter: and it spiralled into remus taking a bunch of fake engagement photos for us this weekend

sirius black: i am well aware sirius black: you stole my boyfriend from me on what would have otherwise been a chill saturday morning and used him to take pictures in a fucking flower field

james potter: that is correct james potter: anyways james potter: it has come to my attention that we make a Very Cute Couple

sirius black: are u saying what i think ur saying

james potter: and now i feel weird because i kind of... wish they weren’t fake??

sirius black: u ARE saying it sirius black: oh my GOD sirius black: took you long enough

james potter: hey now, you agreed not to give me shit

sirius black: if you scroll up, you’ll see i never agreed to anything

james potter: i can’t believe you’re being so rude to me in my time of dire emotional distress

[Monday 16 May, 15:32]

remus lupin: heard you finally got your head out of your ass and admitted you like evans as more than a friend slash hookup

james potter: i’m going to kill sirius, he wasn’t supposed to tell anyone

remus lupin: he’d like you to know that he never agreed to that either remus lupin: but seriously, it was about time

james potter: :( stop making me feel like an idiot for having feelings

remus lupin: you’re not an idiot for having feelings remus lupin: you ARE an idiot for taking so long to realise you’ve had them

james potter: this is a new development james potter: i only had friendly feelings for her until yesterday

remus lupin: …… james remus lupin: you once woke up in the middle of the night to drive to that 24-hour ice cream shop on the other side of town at 3 a.m. so you could take lily her favourite milkshake while she was studying remus lupin: that is NOT something you do for someone you only have friendly feelings for

james potter: it isn’t???

remus lupin: would you do that for me or peter?

james potter: no

remus lupin: hence, not friendly feelings

james potter: … oh

remus lupin: you are useless remus lupin: absolutely useless remus lupin: truly do not know what lily sees in you

james potter: well that’s mean

[Monday 16 May, 16:53]

lily evans: is it sad that i keep forgetting this wedding website is fake?? lily evans: like, i am putting Way Too Much Effort into this given that it is an elaborate ruse to appease some librarians and i keep catching myself fantasising about a real wedding lily evans: literally what is wrong with me

remus lupin: jfc remus lupin: you two really ARE meant for each other

[Monday 16 May, 23:49]

james potter: wait what do you mean ‘what lily sees in me’?? james potter: remus?????

[Tuesday 17 May, 10:03]

lily evans: stage 2 of burn snape’s life to the ground begins tomorrow lily evans: are you ready?

james potter: should i be prepared for a fake marriage this time?

lily evans: haha no, i promise i won’t spring any fake relationship statuses on you this time lily evans: but now that you mention it… lily evans: check out this work of art lily evans: theknot . com / deerlybeloved

james potter: fucking hell, evans james potter: you went all out

lily evans: umm yeah lol lily evans: turns out designing a wedding website is a really fun way to procrastinate

[Tuesday 17 May, 10:16]

james potter: she used a deer pun in the fake wedding page name i actually can’t breathe

sirius black: the transition from complete denial to pathetic sod happened even faster than i expected

james potter: you are ruthless

sirius black: remember when i was the pathetic sod about remus and you gave me SO much shit about it?? sirius black: this is payback, bitchhhhhhh

james potter: you’re right, i deserve this

[Wednesday 18 May, 19:34]

james potter: truly, evans, i don’t understand why you’re studying chem when you’re this good at hacking into things james potter: in other news, i’m having the absolute fucking time of my LIFE on snape’s reddit account rn james potter: i just wrote a long essay about how i’ve learned the errors of my bigoted ways and am embracing the blm movement and intersectional feminism and i’ve never seen something get so violently downvoted so fast

lily evans: see, this is why i knew you were the right accomplice for this lily evans: keep destroying his internet reputation and trolling his weird alt-right community with all your research and logic lily evans: you’re doing amazing sweetie

james potter: studying human rights law does occasionally have its perks james potter: this, plus ya know the whole ‘making the world a better place’ thing

lily evans: i was about to say lily evans: i should hope the only perk isn’t trolling the internet

james potter: ahahahahah yessss one of the admins is threatening to kick me out james potter: also he keeps using mudblood as an insult and i’m like ??? james potter: what does that even mean??

lily evans: somehow i feel like you don’t want to know

james potter: update i found out, and yes you were right, i didn’t want to know

lily evans: in that case, not gonna ask

[Thursday 19 May, 17:35]

severus snape: Potter.

james potter: fuck i really thought i’d blocked your number

severus snape: You’ve pulled childish pranks in the past, but getting me banned from the Death Eaters Messageboard is a new low.

james potter: i’m sorry what james potter: i don’t know what you’re talking about

severus snape: Cut the bullshit. severus snape: In the process of reinstating my account - with none of my reputation points, might I add, thanks for that - I’ve acquired photo evidence of the posts that resulted in my expulsion. severus snape: I know no one else who would both make a play on words about deer and quote a Taylor Swift song in the same sentence. It was obviously you, you childish buffoon.

james potter: haters gonna hate, hate, hate, hate, hate

severus snape: I’m not joking around here.

james potter: baby i’m just gonna shake, shake, shake, shake, shake

severus snape: You’re going to regret this, mark my words.

james potter: i shake it off, i shake it off

james potter has blocked severus snape

[Thursday 19 May, 19:03]

lily evans: come over i’m bored

james potter: is this a ‘come over so we can have sex’ type of come over or a ‘come over so we can watch the good place for the hundredth time’ type of come over

lily evans: why does it have to be one or the other?

james potter: touché james potter: omw

[Thursday 19 May, 22:38]

james potter: RED ALERT I HAVE FUCKED UP james potter: you’re 1000% gonna roast me for this and i don’t fucking care because if i don’t tell someone i’m actually going to explode

sirius black: what happened with lily this time

james potter: bold of you to assume this has to do with lily

sirius black: does it have to do with lily?

james potter: ….. yes

sirius black: my bold assumption proven correct

james potter: anyways, we were shagging, as we do james potter: and it was the ~heat of the moment~, you know??

sirius black: i am not qualified to give you sex advice, if that’s where this is going

james potter: and i might’ve accidentally told her i loved her

sirius black: oh fuck that’s not where this was going

james potter: and now i don’t know what to doooooo

sirius black: well, what did you do after you said it?

james potter: honestly i blacked out james potter: i think i backtracked by telling her i meant that i love fucking her and then just like….. left as soon as we were done

sirius black: jesus fucking CHRIST

[Thursday 19 May, 22:54]

remus lupin: sirius is banging his head on the table repeatedly and given that he was texting you a few minutes ago i can only assume you said something on a whole new level of stupid

[Thursday 19 May, 23:01]

james potter: sirius??? james potter: help???

sirius black: i have never gone out on a date with a woman and even i can tell you that that is absolutely NOT what you do when you tell a girl you love them for the first time sirius black: you absolute knob

james potter: so what do i doooooo

sirius black: tell her the truth maybe? sirius black: the cat’s out of the bag now anyways and it’s not like you can make things any worse than you already have

james potter: but we agreed no one was going to catch feelings when we started sleeping together!! james potter: we pinky swore james potter: i can’t break a pinky swear

sirius black: ffs the fact that you two pinky swore on a sex agreement is something i’ll need to give you shit for at a totally separate time but that’s not the most pressing issue at the moment sirius black: my point stands, breaking a pinky swear is still an improvement on the current situation sirius black: just tell her the truth so you two can become that nauseatingly adorable couple and overtake me and remus as the most vomit-inducing pair in college

james potter: ughhhhh james potter: curse my blood-deprived brain for getting me into this mess

[Saturday 21 May, 9:37]

lily evans: phase 4 of fucking up snape’s life starts today - you ready?

james potter: uhhh yeah james potter: listen, are you okay?

lily evans: yes? why wouldn’t i be?

james potter: idk james potter: but good, that’s good

lily evans: yep, it’s good

james potter: how many phases are there to this snape plan anyways? james potter: will i get to know any of the phases in advance?

lily evans: 4 phases lily evans: phase 1 was putting the world back in its rightful order, phases 2-4 are all about destroying the things he holds most dear lily evans: see: his top 5 placement on that alt-right message board (phase 2), and his good reputation with all the chem professors (phase 3) lily evans: (i handled phase 3 on my own, btw)

james potter: fair enough, don’t know how i would’ve helped with chem professors anyways james potter: pretty sure one of them (slughorn i think?) hates me from that one time sirius and i let chickens loose in the science building

lily evans: oh god yeah he definitely probably does lily evans: anyways, phase 4 is sneaking into his room like he did to mine, and you’re gonna leave the note lily evans: he’ll be properly pissed off if he knows you got in, but he’d probably just wank to a note i left

james potter: thanks for the most cursed mental image of my life james potter: but you’re prob right tbh

lily evans: anyways, i’m pretty good at picking the locks on the dormitory windows, so i’ll go in that way and unlock his room from the inside - all you’ll need to do is show up lily evans: tonight at 7

james potter: roger that

[Saturday 21 May, 13:46]

remus lupin: have you talked to lily about the infamous mid-coital ‘i love you’ yet?

james potter: jfc must sirius tell you everything james potter: and no, i’m getting there i swear

remus lupin: get there faster

[Saturday 21 May, 22:40]

sirius black: is everything okay?? sirius black: actually wait i know the answer to that sirius black: you came in soaking wet two hours ago and grabbed the bottle of whiskey from the kitchen and have been blasting all too well at top volume ever since sirius black: everything is definitely not okay

james potter: fcuk lily evans james potter: and not in the fun way james potter: i’m never gonna fuck her in the fun way again

sirius black: what happened?

james potter: rememember how we were sabotaging snep’s life james potter: *sneep james potter: *snape james potter: turns out, she and sneep go way back james potter: motherfucker james potter: sneep is jsut his name now james potter: anyways, she set me up and betrayed me james potter: sneep knew i was gonna be there and put a booby trap on his door, and he and lily were inside LAUGHING at me

sirius black: wait what the fuck sirius black: lily would never

james potter: but she would apparently james potter: she even has pictures of them in primary school together james potter: i just james potter: fuck

sirius black: that’s actually beyond fucked up

james potter: originally this whole revenge on sneep thing was just me following along with lily’s rage james potter: but now it’s personal james potter: the lily revenge plan didn’t have a phase 5, but the james version does james potter: and i’m taking both of them dwon james potter: is it petty? yes james potter: will it actually fix th fact that evans betrayed me? no james potter: but will it make me feel better? yess james potter: and that, i think, is a valid reason james potter: will u hlep me??

sirius black: i mean, i’m always down to fuck with sneep sirius black: but uhh, maybe sleep off the alcohol first sirius black: and stop playing all too well

james potter: okye

sirius black: that was not an invitation to start playing you’re not sorry

james potter: taylor swift is th eonly person who gets my sadness right now i cant’ help it

[Sunday 22 May, 9:21]

lily evans: i called you like 5 times last night, why didn’t you pick up

james potter: i wasn’t aware you’d want to talk to me james potter: too busy hanging out with your bff sneep

lily evans: jfc you’re such a drama queen

james potter: excuse me

lily evans: also god no i’d never hang out with snape lily evans: sneep? lol

james potter: it was a typo that i’m making into an Official Thing james potter: you two seemed awfully cozy yesterday james potter: you know, when you betrayed me and led me straight into a trap

lily evans: ffs i didn’t betray you lily evans: if you would’ve picked up any of my calls last night, i would’ve been able to explain to you that this was all part of the plan

james potter: wait what

lily evans: i had to make you think i’d betrayed you because you can’t act for shit

james potter: why did you need me to think that

lily evans: for the real phase 4 lily evans: i’m destroying everything snape holds dear lily evans: which, yes, includes both his weird messageboard reputation and his teacher’s pet status, but you know what’s at the very top of that list? lily evans: his perpetual wank that i’m going to realise he was the perfect man for him all along lily evans: hence, i have lulled him into a false sense of believing his fantasy has finally come true so i can crush it under my heel once and for all

james potter: that is… downright diabolical

lily evans: i take revenge crusades very seriously

james potter: ok but how do i know you’re not double crossing me again?

lily evans: bc for fuck’s sake in what world would i EVER want to be with someone who treats me like a fucking prize that he’s owed for being nice to me as a kid?? lily evans: c’mon potter, you know me better than that

james potter: it felt SO REAL yesterday though

lily evans: that is because i, unlike you, am excellent at acting

james potter: why do you keep implying i’m a bad actor??

lily evans: because you are lily evans: exhibit a - you told me you loved me and then proceeded to full-on panic so hard that you gave the world’s worst cover up and ran away at the first possible moment

james potter: oh god, you noticed that

lily evans: of course i noticed that, because once again, you are the world’s worst actor

james potter: yikes james potter: i’m sorry, i know i managed to break literally the only rule we had going into this arrangement

lily evans: it’s actually kinda convenient, tbh lily evans: considering i broke it as well

james potter: you what

lily evans: as it happens, i have somewhat recently come to the realisation that my feelings for you are somewhat outside the bounds of what one would consider ~friendly~

james potter: was it the wedding website james potter: is that what did it

lily evans: embarrassingly enough…. yes

james potter: SAME

lily evans: wait seriously??

james potter: so serious i’m not even gonna make a sirius pun james potter: i mean, did you SEE how good we look together?? james potter: evans, we are a POWER COUPLE

lily evans: hell yes we are

james potter: a power couple who takes sneep down once and for all

lily evans: hell yes we are x100 lily evans: come over in a bit? gotta discuss the actual plan lily evans: i may have an idea that makes it even better

[Sunday 22 May, 10:21]

james potter: on second thought, plans have changed yet again

sirius black: i take it this is a positive change sirius black: given that you have now taken to blasting call it what you want

james potter: :)

[Sunday 22 May, 13:05]

james potter has unblocked severus snape

james potter: hey bro i just wanted to say i’m sorry for trying to sneak into your room

severus snape: You’re not my bro. Don’t call me that. severus snape: We both know you’re only apologising because you wanted to get into Lily’s pants.

james potter: not what this is about but go off i guess

severus snape: You’re just jealous because for once, the nice guy did get the girl. severus snape: Apology not accepted, by the way.

[Sunday 22 May, 13:13]

james potter: Attachment - 1 Screenshot james potter: at what point do i get to tell him i’ve actually been in your pants

lily evans: your time will come lily evans: but for now, stop texting sneep and put your phone down so that you can cuddle with your naked girlfriend who’s literally on the other side of the bed waiting for you

james potter: don’t have to ask me twice

[Sunday 22 May, 13:57]

lily evans: hey sev? wanna meet me at the founder’s garden this afternoon?

severus snape: Of course. Let’s do 4.

lily evans: looking forward to it xx

[Sunday 22 May, 18:59]

sirius black: heard sneep had a temper tantrum so dramatic half of the college overheard it

james potter: it was iconic

sirius black: also heard you and evans are engaged now???

james potter: ah, that part is just hearsay james potter: we decided to lean into the fact that we’ve already got a fake wedding website and just throw a fake proposal in there for good measure james potter: it’s still not an actual engagement james potter: but sneep doesn’t know that, and he never will

sirius black: that is so fantastically stupid, but then again, i don’t know why i’d expect anything less from you two at this point

james potter: i am going to buy her a less shitty ring though - not like an actual diamond one, but something in the middle ground, ya know? james potter: if she’s gonna wear it all the time it might as well be nice

[Sunday 22 May, 23:41]

severus snape: You are despicable. severus snape: You stole the girl who was clearly MINE. Lily loved ME first.

james potter: first of all, lily doesn’t belong to anyone james potter: second of all, she picked me

severus snape: And we all know you’re just going to drop her as soon as you get your dick wet.

james potter: not that our sex life is any of your business, but i can assure you that i have already disproven that theory

severus snape: That’s disgusting. I didn’t need to know that.

james potter: i mean, you’re the one who keeps bringing things back to getting into lily’s pants james potter: just wanted to share that the experience is indeed a pleasant one, 10/10 would recommend, not that you’ll ever get to experience it for yourself

severus snape: Fuck. You.

james potter: you know what i think, sneep?

severus snape: My name is Snape. Surely your pea brain can at least spell that properly.

james potter: i think you need to calm down james potter: you’re being too loud

james potter has blocked severus snape

[Monday 23 May, 12:54]

lily evans: fyi the uni library staff sent us one of those mini waffle makers as an engagement gift

james potter: oh my god james potter: best fake engagement ever

lily evans: figured you’d enjoy that

#jily fanfiction #jily fic #jily fanfic #jily #james potter #lily evans #james potter x lily evans #fluff #crackfic #i mean basically #chatfic #also fuck snape #kbyeeeee

18 notes · View notes

sunshinexlollipops · 5 years

Note

FOR THE LOVE OF MANGOS PLZ. A/O ARTHUR HEADCANONS (both with the reader and Arthur being A/O plz! Thx!!!)

anon. I have heard your prayers. your answers are coming. (like Arthur. and much of this community over abo Arthur, apparently lol.)

BONUS: alongside doing alpha and omega for Arthur, I did high and low honor as well. It would definitely affect how Arthur acts in the ABO verse. Also made gender neutral, alongside you being alpha or omega yourself. ;)

——————

A L P H A A R T H U R

Low Honor

when you first arrive in the gang, Arthur allows his eyes to wander to you. he leered alongside the others when you were new, and he didn’t make any attempt at hiding his interest.

soon, the others become competition, and you best believe Arthur is going to finesse himself an alpha/omega like you. you are his prize.

he boasts about himself, takes the lead on missions, steals the prettiest and best stuff for you, hunts your favorite game, puffs his chest, tries to act badass and suave. he pretty much postures himself at you, acting like a stereotypical alpha trying to impress their intended mate.

and normally, you hate pompous alphas like this, but damn if it doesn’t work.

he’s possessive asf. constantly baring his teeth at anyone who so much as looks your way with any interest in their gaze.

you’re HIS alpha/omega, and he makes sure to let everyone know.

there’s also a huge thing about scent: you have to ALWAYS smell like you’re his. whether he marks you, your clothes— or even puts you in his own— strangers don’t even have a problem with knowing that there is an alpha to answer to if they try anything.

if someone even so much as makes a comment or joke, or if a stranger says something in passing, best believe you have an enraged Arthur Morgan at the ready. he will take people down, guns or not.

marking is also done with hickeys. he loves how flustered they make you, and he takes damn pleasure in seeing the jealousy in the others’ eyes for getting to put them all over your neck. it’ll make it that much sweeter for his mating bite.

he hints about your upcoming heat/rut, or even about his own, and there’s no doubt that he wants to be there for the main event.

and when it does happen, Arthur is there before you’re even really into it. you can even be in the middle of camp, he won’t care— he’ll grab ahold of you, throw you over his shoulder, and take you where he deems fit to weather it out.

(maybe his tent in camp, or an abandoned shack he scoped out nearby, it all depends. because even if someone tries to bother you both, they’re getting shot.)

the alpha is rough and quick, he gives it to you like you need. there’s never a dull or slow moment when you’re in bed with Arthur.

overstimulation KING. you think your climax is the end of it? WRONG. he will work you through every second. even when he’s got a knot deep in you. the man will stop when either you or him drop. and good luck, he’s got stamina core for daysssss

also. huge fan of eating you raw. he loves getting your slick in his beard, till he looks wet with it. he will literally make you drip from his tongue alone. you’re better than a shot of whiskey any day.

when you do pass out eventually, Arthur takes those moments to stand outside for a quick smoke break. shirtless. with nail marks from you all over his chest and back. he likes the way Micah gets pissed, because he was never alpha enough for anything like this. (a cig never tasted so good, either.)

he’ll sketch you as you are, naked, and marked up by him. he also does close ups of his bites, those are his faves.

it’s when you’re deepest in heat that he gives you his mating bite. you knew it was coming, he made it obvious, but it doesn’t stop the gasp that escapes you when he does it.

he places it where it’ll be obvious no matter what you do, and he likes it like that

he’ll mark your neck up like nothing else, and he’s very proud of the way you looked wrecked afterward

you don’t walk right for at least a week and a half afterward, something that Arthur puffs his chest about. he always smirks at the comments the others make at your stiff gate. it makes watching you that much more pleasurable.

likes you loud. he wants no one to doubt when he takes you. he wants you screaming so they can all hear just how good he’s making you feel. you’re embarrassed most of the time, but shame is nothing he could ever feel when it comes to something like that.

pretty much every time a job goes well or there’s a celebration, it ends with him knotting you. ;)

when stuff goes bad, there’s still knotting, but expect him to get you to the point where your body aches as much as it sings under him.

if you get pregnant, expect Arthur to be extremely pleased with himself. he bred you well, and he can’t wait to see how you’ll look.

he’s more possessive and wanting of you when you’re expecting— you always have him stiff and hungered when he sees you as you are, knowing he did that to you

when the kids (or pups) are born, he’ll try and get you knocked right back up

High Honor

it starts with a crush, and dear lord was Arthur pining when you first arrived.

he hears the others gushing about you, and when the others also speak of their own interest, Arthur stays quiet and feels hopeless— how could you end up with an alpha like him with so many better people lining up?

he vents in his journal, writing poems and fantasies he has where he gets to be your alpha. he is very longing, and sometimes you catch him staring at the fire or when you happen to feels his eyes on you. (he can’t be subtle, even though he thinks he is.)

he draws you, ofc. with flowers in your hair, when you laugh. his favorite moments are when you’re smiling, because he likes to imagine that he’s the sole reason it’s stretching your lips.

this man practically breaks his own heart over you, and he M O P E S

but, much to his surprise, the girls and other encourage him, and he FINALLY gathers the courage to tell you about the god damn cavity you’ve made with how sweet he is on you and you A C C E P T?

he courts you, right and proper like an alpha should. he gets you flowers, sweets, nice clothes or other trinkets he thinks you’d like— all acquired fairly. he also takes you on dates, from the theater in Saint Denis to quiet rides through the Heartlands with you by his side.

he endures so much teasing, especially from Micah and John, but he will take it. he doesn’t care if he’s gone “soft,” you’re too good for him to be anything but. Micah can still stfu though.

he doesn’t ask you to help with him during his rut, and he’s shy to offer his... uh.... assistance.... with your heat/rut. not because he doesn’t want to, but because he doesn’t want to pressure you! he doesn’t want you to think he’s only here for that, or that he would be disappointed if you declined! this dumbass would gladly go gray if you waited that long.

(which you never would, obviously. but damn if that isn’t sweet asf.)

when it does come around, he is so sweet. he found this really nice place— this precious cabin— and he’s been preparing it for months while he waited for this moment.

he’s so gentle with you, and not impatient at all. he preps you, makes sure you’re always comfortable. he only intends for you to feel pleasure, not pain, and trust me— you’re gonna enjoy yourself.

he peppers you with kisses, constantly asking if you’re okay or if there’s something else he can do. he’ll follow your requests, and give you what you need as you want it.

when you climax, Arthur is sweet to you, he praises you, holds you close as it happens. he doesn’t push you, and let’s you float right back to him whenever you’re ready.

during the moments in between the heights of your heat, he cleans you up, and feeds you peaches by his fingers as you lean against his chest.

he’ll hum songs for you, because of course he doesn’t know the words. but the tunes are pretty, just like you.

if you ask kindly enough, he’ll even read from his journal. but don’t worry, he’s always been a sucker for big doe eyes, and yours do him the worst.

he shows you the sketches he’s made too, especially when he was thinking you’d never give him the honor of being your alpha. they’re too precious.

the heat/rut will pass without a mating bite, because it needs to be done RIGHT.

he plans it out, it’s pretty much Hallmark. he buys your favorite food, takes you to your favorite place. he makes it special by giving you the same flowers that made his first bouquet that he gave you, and made sure to ask you under the stars like you wanted.

he is careful about it, and he feels awful that it has to hurt, but he makes sure to kiss it afterward, and he gives you a tonic to make it stop aching.

he places it lower on your neck, where it can be easily covered if you wanted

(but you’d never— because the way Arthur looks so flustered when you walk around with unbuttoned collars is WORTH IT)

he is such a proud alpha, and he walks around camp with his head held high and not even Micah can bring him down

he constantly gets you things, or does stuff with you. he never lets a moment pass where you don’t feel loved or appreciated by him

if you get pregnant, Arthur will be emotional. tears, but happy ones, will be shed. he can’t believe he got so lucky to mate an alpha/omega like you, and that you’re giving him a family again.

after you break the news, Arthur will practically worship you. that, and he will be protective like nobody’s business over anything and everything— someone threatens you? someone says your fat? expect low honor Arthur levels of mayhem.

when your kid finally get into the world, he can’t help but be the proudest papa Arthur. he is a bear to these kids, and he dotes on them endlessly. but he also makes time for you, and always tells you how grateful he is.

he doesn’t push for more kids, but you can tell he’s a big family man, and you can’t help but try and put a smile on his face for as much as he finally puts one on yours like he wanted to from the start

O M E G A A R T H U R

Low Honor

when you arrive— holy shit. he might as well be in heat with how wet you get him. the others thirst over you too, and oh, it makes Arthur j e a l o u s.

NEEDY. when he notices you, you spark an itch he can’t scratch. he is constantly biding for your attention, and he’ll do whatever he can to get it.

he touches himself to the thought of you, and he gets off many a time by the fantasy of you getting him and claiming him. never gets old. especially when you catch him moaning. totally not on purpose.

Arthur does all he can to seem like the omega you desire, and he may or may not have done things like play around with your clothes to get you smelling like him.

when his heat comes up, he plays up how bad they are and that he needs someone. he definitely makes sure to do this around you. for no reason at all, of course.

you offer, and ohmygod what a surprise Arthur accepts that shit like VISA

Arthur preps like nobody’s business. he tries to make himself look nice, tries to figure out things you like. he aims to have you claiming him by the end of this.

when he feels his heat ramp up, he’s slick for you, and let’s you know.

he takes control, and rides you hard. has has you begging for him, he takes you so deep. he’s practically hoarse himself, and the whole camp knows just how you feel inside of him now.

(thanks Arthur)

he plays on your instincts, and he manages to get you to bite him on the neck. your claim is the first thing he’s wanted since a good fuck when his first heat hit, and damn if he didn’t get both from you.

if you knot Arthur, it practically makes him D R O O L

Arthur has no shame about the bite. he shows it off, let’s everyone know that he got claimed. he hasn’t been this much of a show since he presented.

he always tells you how slick you get him, and he will always try and pull a quickie whenever he can manage.

he tries to spur jealousy from you whenever he can, but don’t worry, he’s just as possessive over you

High Honor

holy shit. you. you are something else, and damn if Arthur doesn’t feel like a sad pathetic omega for lusting after you as he is.

he’s never craved someone like you before, and he doesn’t know how to feel about it. he hasn’t even exactly felt the desire to be claimed, but oh, you make him feel a lotta things.

he doesn’t try to mention his heats— he doesn’t want you to think you owe him help or that he’s dreamt about you making him feel good, but when you finally ask about it it just kinda... happens?

when you offer helping him, he about loses his mind. you? during his heat? what did he do to deserve that?

he gets so nervous, thinking he’ll embarrass himself, or that you’ll reject him for whatever reason. he thinks he’s hideous and doesn’t understand what you see back in him, but he just tries to focus on making it good for you.

you notice his nerves, and you assure him it’s fine. pretty much all of his heat, you’re praising him, and you get to see just how it gets to the omega. apparently, he really likes it when you tell him how good he is.

Arthur feels great, and he responds so well. you light him on fire, and damn, a heat never felt this good. you make it bearable. enjoyable. that isn’t an easy feat.

when Arthur climaxes, he clenches around you, both with his arms and his body— and he cries out.

you end up biting him out of reflex, and oh god— it makes Arthur caterwaul because he didn’t know how much he needed this

you apologize, saying you should’ve known and done better, but Arthur doesn’t care. he loves it. and he loves you.

Arthur is proud of your bite, and he can’t believe he’s your mate. he accepts the role with grace, and enjoys the way it gets you flustered.

he oftens tells you how much he loves you, and how he wouldn’t be mated to anyone else.

there you go anon! hope you enjoyed. ;)

384 notes · View notes

lilytcyip · 4 years

Text

December 31st, 2019

1.3 tera v w/ rjin & ggao

1.4 cactus & la foret w/ jng

1.8 talked it out with jng ; tried to understand that if i were happy, what more could you ask for

1.11 cyns bday dinner

1.11 craft beer w/ aleung & lwong

1.13 arisu & standing egg with efeng & aleung ; drove on highway for the first time

1.18 west dineout w/ annie pkp

1.19 glass w/ fifi

2.10 first snow of the year

2.3 cny lunch at home with the fam - tong yuen & poon choi

2.4 mooseknuckles - grateful

2.5 lunar new year

2.16 hangiout with mamayip & sis: beta 5, fixing the parka, meetfresh, miku sushi dindin

2.17 mom leaving for 2 months, wandering earth with the yips

2.19 happy hour cactus w/ fifi

2.20 kokoro lunch & shopping w/ rjin

2.20 so hyang w/ veda & nwu

2.21 black been noodles & tonkatsu lunch & usagi matcha sweets w/ ewong

2.22 green leaf sushi & grounds for coffee w/ vtan

2.25 sushi mura w/ acao ; larry berg planes and kisses for the first time

3.13 mental health talk w/ nwu & tchiu + jamjar

3.15 virtuous pie & nanas green tea w/ rjin

3.16 wine night w/ claw, aleung & fsyal

3.17 tabom & stanely park w/ jerpilla

3.23 pool & rc shopping with jyang

4.3 studying with jyang on campus & langara bye

4.9 studying with jyang at my house

4.18 ramen danbo & official date

4.20 so hyang & off the grid waffles w/ ayip

4.26 sci ning off w/ aleung, claw, fsyal, lwong & mcheung

4.27 clay llama terra pot class

4.29 so hyang budae jjigae & yifang w/ ewong

4.30 rc shopping & sushi lover with the yips

5.1 maenam, kits beach & rain or shiine ice cream w/ rjin

5.2 our first little tiff & being called chubby by mlo

5.3 shopping w/ vchan, aleung & fsyal

5.7-5.11 LA trip

5.8 LACMA & melrose & century city field

5.9 warner bros tour

5.10 malibu

5.28-6.1 hokkaido, japan

5.29 a 2-floor hotel with own onsen

5.31 otaru food adventures

6.1 doraemon painting & royce airport

6.2 macau: got scammed by taxi & lost luggage

6.7-6.15 inner mongolia & beijing

6.18 first co op offer

6.21 fire port party at fifis house

6.29 pottery painting w lwong, aleung, vchan, fsyal

7.5 brunch w/ rjin at jethro’s fine grub, baker & table

7.6 nwu’s birthday dindin at coast, hangout with aleung & nwu at nightingale

7.14 leavenworth cherries

7.17 brunch w/ rjin at OEB

7.19 nightmarket w/ jyang, mlaw, rjin

7.21 beach day w/ aleung, fsyal & lwong; hy’s with fam

7.24 chau veggies w/ acao

7.27 shiok & icy bar w/ ewong

8.3 first day of work at doctors office

8.4 escape room w/ vchan, fsyal & jyang; bowling & anh and chi

8.17 dindin w/ fsyal, aleung & tlim; double date walks at olympic village with ancas

8.18 - 8.19 kelowna

8.18 polar grove & penticton lazy river, mission hill

8.19 kayaking, quail’s gate

8.24 lit night at fifis house with the girls and boys

8.25 aleung’s bday harrison trip

8.27 work shopping & nuba w/ fsyal

8.28 sleepover w/ rjin

8.29 brunch w/ aleung, moii cafe chill with fsyal too

9.3 first day of co op work

9.7 grave of the fireflies & wildtale cuddles

9.14 eric chou meet & greet

9.19 amandarachlee neg comment and posted my encouragement on her story

10.5 maiko parfait & shopping w/ jyang, earls with the amigos

10.18 gmen & oncecake: melody, rillakuma, card & collage

10.24 dark table w/ rjin

11.7 moii after work

12.15 baking custard souffle pancakes w/ ewong

12.18 office christmas party & bbt w/ slim

12.19 glow

12.21 fifi’s christmas party

12.22 christmas market w/ rjin: churros & chimney cake

12.23 psyc team secret santa & mahjong

12.25 christmas dindin at market by jean-georges

12.26 birthday dindin at zeferelli

12.27 ring & birthday dinner at brix and mortar w/ jyang

12.28 skated alone, worked out, baked & dindin at botanist

looking back at it now, i definitely went out a lot more compared to previous years LOL i had some struggles in january, and at multiple points in my life i blamed myself for being ungrateful, for seeking more when i already had so much in life compared to other people. my friends were there for me and i wouldnt have been able to live through it without them. then again, during reading break in february, i got myself into the same hot mess and i was sad about it for a week and i blamed myself for getting so attached so quickly. because of these experiences, my expectations were v low and i didnt really expect anything when i talked to jyang, what they say really is true, you get it the moment you stop seeking for it. it comes and find you (: the 3 most important that happened this year is burbur, co op job & me getting more comfortable around doggs; this is a big deal !! i actually like cuddling dogs and i feel less scared of them as long as i have some time to get used to them!! im proud of myself for making progress with my phobia! after i started my co op job, bc i didnt have a lot to do, i felt like i wasnt actively contributing to my workplace and that i was very useless. i still feel the same way now, but i think i am slowly getting used to it. thankfully, my coworkers are VERY nice and i enjoy working around them. while i did not get a different position for january, im still grateful that i got an extended placement. nonetheless, meeting with the different PIs and sumeet pointed me in the right direction of looking for nserc / volunteering opportunities when i do go back to school. AND ofc burbur! im grateful that we were able to be there for each other for the past 8 months, both the ups and downs and i am so so thankful that we’re understanding and patient with each other, as we help each other learn along the way and help each other become a better version of ourselves. this companionship is better than i have asked for and i always remind myself to focus on the important things rather than the minor inconveniences. this year, in terms of fitness goals, ive been doing really well before asia. but ever since i came back, it all went downhill and i gained back all the weight that i lost this year year LOL so in 2020, one of my biggest goal is to eat healthy again, and workout more consistently. getting a job in sept kinda interfered with my progress too, bc i was so tired after work, even when i wasnt doing anything and i stressed eat bc i felt terrible. a lot of diff factors made me feel super stressed, and the fact that i wasnt eating clean / exercising reguarly made me feel worse about the whole situation ): so in 2020, maintaining a healthy lifestyle will be one of my top priorities and gifting myself a healthy body is one of greatest things i can do for myself. this also contributed to the lack of journalling near the end of the year, it felt like bc i wasnt doing the things i was “supposed to do”, i just felt so bad whenever i couldnt tick off that particular habit whenever i fill in my trackers. but tonight, i watched this video and it talked about habits should be for awareness, not for self-hate or self-loathing. this is something that i need to keep in mind. ever since april really, the issue of leaving my house and meeting up with my friends have always stressed me in fear of dealing with passive aggressiveness with my mom lool everytime i get inviited to plans, i just get anxiety about having to tell her about it LOL and even when im out, having a msg/ call for her freaks me out in fear that she will get mad at me for being home late and etc and fifi really woke me up with her words, i should just care less LOL i need to stop caring so much about what she thinks, bc at the end of the day, this IS my life and if i never make any changes, i will never be able to grow and be independent. i think this pree much sums up all my events and emotions in 2019, the last year of the 2010s. in the next decade, a lot of things will happen as i will be in my 20s - 30s, where new opportunities will arise, and graduate uni, do my masters, find a job, maybe even marry and move out LOL the 2020s will definitely be an impt decade, but just for next year i want to:

1. understand that i am old enough to make choices, and in general, care less about what she thinks

2. at the same time, i want to appreciate and be grateful for what my mom, dad and annie have done for me; a lot of the times, i feel like i take them for granted just bc i know they will always be there for me and this is not how you should treat your biggest supporters

3. trust that everything will workout in the end, while you may not be able to envision what you career / life would be like when youre 30, you can definitely take small steps and move towards your goal

4. be mindful of what i eat and exercise regularly (4x hiit & cardio a week) ; treats & sweets in moderation; use those habit trackers for awareness, not for self-loathing / self-hate

5. create art regularly, read more and at least do 5 duolingos every week!

every year, time just seems to go by faster and faster and i feel scared at times. as i type this, theres only 8 minutes left of this decade LOL so in 2020, continue to live in the moment, be present, cherish those that are around you, and have faith that everything will come together, one piece at a time. at the same time, always rmb that you can make small changes to be a better version of yourself, whenever & however you want and this is the 1 thing that other people can’t stop you from doing!

#diary #personal #thoughts #last post of 2019

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sl-c · 5 years

Note

honestly thank you for being so honest online even if it’s not always positive. i just saw ur snap about only exercising 3 times this month and i’m struggling the exact same, i’ve only had 1 day off work in the past 2 weeks and all my shifts have been pretty much 9 hours busy on my feet as a barista and i just don’t have it in me to gym after that but i’m finding it really hard to accept and not push myself (i’ll have a breakdown if i do i know but lol i’m so hard on myself for missing)

aw I’m glad it helped, that’s exactly why I post when things aren’t always perfect because it’s so important to remember we’re all human, we all go through struggles & to be kind + real with ourselves.

I can totally understand how you feel & how exhausting it gets. My hours over Christmas were just like that & that is exactly why I took a break from exercise to begin with. No it’s not the same as going to the gym but being on your feet & under that kind of stress is still a workout in itself!

Look the best thing you can do is be real with yourself & make a decision. Feeling guilty comes from the idea that you have the option to go to the gym but for an unjust reason aren’t going, when in reality you have a completely just reason not to go, in fact, as you said, it would be better for you not to go otherwise you will have a breakdown, not to mention probably exhaust yourself further & then not being able to work or work properly. Personally, I made the decision before working those hours that I was not gong to put any added stress to my routine including pressuring myself to exercise (which usually involves getting up earlier, reducing my sleep etc etc), unless ofc I had some spontaneous amount of time & energy, but realistically I told myself that was incredibly unlikely. Then once I was working I hardly felt stressed or guilty about it & I could really focus on resting/recovering after work, sleeping & just being able to keep up work & earn the money I needed basically.

Ultimately it really comes down to priorities & although exercise is incredibly important sometimes other things can be important in the short-term. I also think it’s really important not to have a relationship with exercise, or anything for that matter, where you can’t be flexible & have time off it at some point or another, particularly if it’s for something important.

I also have some tips for little things you can do that don’t require as much time, effort & energy as the gym but that can still give you some endorphins, help you keep positive, help clear your mind, help you get that feel-good mojo going, relax you or wake you up etc etc:

cold showers - super refreshing, helps wake you up, helps get the circulation going, can help regulate movements (if you get me)

face/hair masks - having a big pot that you can go to whenever you feel stressed is sooo helpful, relaxing & rewarding, not to mention good for your skin if you buy the right product

little yoga flow - you can do it anywhere, anytime & you can choose what kind of flow depending on your energy levels. I find even just 10-20 minutes of yoga (e.g. before or after work) is so good for keeping me calm, clearing my head, getting movement to my body & makes me feel so much better about everything. I highly recommend the app ‘downward dog’ which is the best yoga app I’ve found - it allows you to completely customise your yoga flow from time, experience, focus to even playlist

daily stretching (morning, evening, lunch break etc) - follow the same stretching routine everyday not only helps you get into a helpful habit but also relaxes you, gets the body moving & allows you to connect with your body

journaling - this has always been something I’ve found great release in. Sharing all your thoughts openly is so cathartic & whether you’re writing about how exhausted you are or how feel you bad about not exercising or maybe that you had a cute date with someone, I find it all really helps you let go, relax & not feel so bad about things that may be going on

walking around the block - even just a 10 minute walk is scientifically proved to help your mental health & clarity so much. Never underestimate a little walk around the block at whatever time of day.

DANCE - having a little dance around your place while you’re getting ready for work, on the way to work, cooking dinner at home - whatever - is so good for the body, mind & soul!!

swim in the ocean - refreshing, awakening, relaxing, soothing, healing, just fkn everything. Whether you swim laps or you’re quickly in an out, swimming in the ocean is magic. I find this particular good for before work if you need to wake up & in the evenings just before bed so you can have a warm shower & feel cleansed (esp. good with friends night swimming)

hope that helps & all the best. xxxx

#answered #advice #work #gym #exercise #food #motivation #meditation #yoga #movement

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inhalareexhalare · 6 years

Photo

The menstrual cycle begins. I usually feel pain until the third day at most, but I can move just fine.

Slow, but with fight in it Like embers of honey

It scorches the eyes But is sweet to the palm

Did you know by the way? The faster and the hotter you heat honey, the more you reduce its nutritional value. So yes, while it has a very warm color, its temperature is usually not the same :)

2018-10-23 10:00 Philippines Tuesday

My daytime journal has been discontinued due to its tendency to take over my whole identity. I somewhat live [a double life], you could say, and I am now exploring my nighttime psyche.

This is my heartfelt "letter" to @neweresth (CHECK OUT neweresth IN YOUR DASHBOARD BTW IT WILL ROCK YOUR DORMANT WORLD), who inspires me to keep learning and discover my photographic sense.

True enough, this nighttime journal has been a very big compilation of crunchy insights to my deep-deep-down subconscious, which in my opinion takes a big bite off the whole pie of what makes the self.

I've been anxious about how to teach for a time now. It's like a secret calling, a secret dream that I have that I quietly—and secretly—shut off every time it resurfaces.

The reason is my ineptitude with socializing. Communication, especially verbal, has always been hard for me.

My English teachers throughout my school life (and even outside its premises) have doubted my authorship of countless papers I've written, all due to the fact that I navigate speech poorly, yet apparently write eloquently enough above my age.

That has discouraged me from honing my lesser swords. The possibility of never growing out of anything.

But that's bullshit.

I write because I love. I write because I want to communicate. Communicate!

I write for no one else other than for the truths that live inside me, and they are written for no one else but others who could do with a genuine story that cares about their beautiful and suffering minds.

I am socially inept. I am antisocial, by the world's standards. But that doesn't change what I write for.

I write to learn.

Likewise I will teach to learn.

Maybe I am bad at it. Maybe it takes talent.

But nothing good has ever touched and transformed hearts and minds other than that which has originated from those very things.

Talent is a gift indeed.

But heart even more so; it is both curse and privilege.

The pain that makes us human. The agony that teaches us what is real. The happiness that guides us to what is worth living for.

If I had all power, and all talent, all knowledge, and all beauty. If I had all riches, and all the admiration, and fame, and number of friends--

If I have not love, I am nothing.

PS I really do love movies. If you’re an aspiring writer, or a writer with fluctuating inspiration, do watch The Rewrite. Check out 1 Corinthians 13:2

“And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing.”

2018-10-23 18:07 Philippines Tuesday

"Keenness, spontaneity, and trusting the moment..."

I entered the room to discover a Thor exploring the wonders of my film-filled laptop.

I took my favorite Nuyorican Poets Cafe book to read and learn. Stepped out to the living room filled with people and stretched my legs to feel at home on the couch. I made a re-friend! :) Yana approached me and asked about the book.

I didn't know she was interested in prose and poetry! She also writes snippets here and there sometimes. I told her to collect them.

I asked for recommendations, since strangely enough, even though I like to write I don't have a wide background when it comes to poetry from the celebrated and the local poets alike.

I don't know why I didn't read them sooner.

Keep learning!

2018-10-23 19:31 Philippines Tuesday

To Karu:

Sorry for imposing on you last night. I just really do value good sleep. I don't know about you but I can't workout without it, and it also affects the general mood and brain function.

I still don't know what to do about it. Everyone seems to enjoy not sleeping at night, but I don't feel like conforming to it especially since I see its daily effects on me. You can actually join stuff like that if you like. I was thinking that we both need sleep desperately, but I realized that I might have been forcing/pressuring you to go to bed.

Though I do request to have no guests in the late night of this approaching Saturday. I'm going to need tons of energy and also an early alarm since I will be called for work (thank God they allowed me to go to church first)

(Even if I did only request it, that doesn't change what it might have felt to you. So again, I apologize if a part of you was in unease or anything.)

I love you

[25 minutes later]

I would like to kiss you all over, but that will rouse you from sleep.

I love you, and I love you to death.

2018-10-24 06:21 Philippines Wednesday

From Isla:

"My tita and tito from [the] US are here in the PH right now

"and they said im too young to be in a relationship.

"and gave this vibe like......don't be in one right now.

"i really appreciate the love and support from them ofc

"it's just....medj na-down ako lol" [I was a bit downhearted lol]

To Isla:

I'm assuming they aren't free thinkers, your aunt and uncle hahaha

They probably are right, but if you think about it that observation is only relative to an imaginary concept which is the future

In my opinion, no one is too old, and no one is too young. It's never too late, and it's never too early

There's only now, and a moment's opportunity to come to a decision

There's only now, and a moment's commitment to be true to who you are at this point in time

Only what is existent after all counts as truth :) the future is yet to happen, and both possible and unlikely

Entrusting the sense of reality to tomorrow, in other words, a question mark seems illogical to me

The BEAUTIFUL book you gave me about the deaf-mutes gave me this idea

The future is not a universal or "natural" concept

[Check out Seeing Voices by Oliver Sacks]

And the past is not more real than a memory is. And we all know how nearly inexistent memories are. That's all they are--memories.

From Isla:

"Those are beautiful thoughts. :)

"Reading it really helped me.

"I'm thankful that i have you in my life."

[An hour later]

"Did other people tell you the same thing before? if you don't mind me asking

"Have you ever been so hard on yourself one time in your life, and eventually you stopped it?

What did you do to overcome it?"

To Isla:

Personally, it takes me a continuous amount of effort to stand up against the self-hatred. Some say it's a lifelong sickness we have as humans, and it seems true to me

(also, writing heals both the writer, and hopefully the reader, so it's mutually a good thing, hopefully hahaha)

It's like the motivation to commit to a vocation

It's not natural to be motivated at every moment of your life, but we seek to make it a habit

Habits form the shape that our thoughts and feelings take. Like my nighttime anxiety. It was developed because I gained the habit of thinking that I am alone and abandoned every time these factors come together: it is nighttime, and I am physically alone

I unconsciously associate the scenery with something from the past that reminds me of a similar situation, but is actually entirely different

In fact it dates back to the time I was still very close to my mother. We still loved each other as I grew up, but not too close as to always be hugging every chance we get

It dates back to when I was a little girl of age 5 at most (since the scenes were from my Atimonan home, and we left that when I entered elementary)

Habits don't die on their own. They cannot be thrown away just like that. But, they can be replaced

If I can create a little nighttime routine, even just cue words or a little ritual, that could change a lot. I just need consistency because some nights I'm too tired and I forget to pray or to practice deep breaths and stuff. And when I find myself alone again, it starts all over; I get anxious as hell

So maybe the first step before changing your habits would be to forgive yourself

We are imperfect, at that is incurable. But we have the potential for growth, and that is at least forgivable. We can learn from our mistakes, so we shouldn't let ourselves down from them.

They are there to give us two options: give up, or try again.

Changing a habit is probably going to take more tries than my fingers can count, but hey we're still alive and breathing, so I presume Life is willing to give us as many chances as we need in a lifetime

Failure is unfortunate, but failure is an important mark of what truly matters to you.

If it's worth more than the self-obsessive need to be successful, and if it means your life and your calling and a better world, it's at least worth trying again, no? :)

When people bring you down, they could be there for a good reason, and that's not to bring you down. Maybe that's hardly what they wanted to do in the first place.

We need to learn to assert our own beliefs and stand up to them. Maybe they think it's all just a whim because they don't understand yet how it matters to you, and what it means to grow up.

Growing up means making mistakes (your relationship is not necessarily a mistake haha), getting up, and learning something new.

Learning something new always requires a new experience.

Learning something new always means stepping out of your comfort zone and into unknown territory.

If you end up hurt, that's fine, we're here for you. What's important is that the lessons are not lost. What you learn is what you grow out into.

So don't ever stop learning. :)

Learn to stand up for what you believe in.

Don't be afraid to share what you have learned!

But never impose beyond your personal right to live. Nothing teaches an individual more than a personal experience.

We each take our own paths, and each take our own lessons in life, in forms that we are ready to understand.

And if advice or conversation cannot help your case with them, then you've done your part.

All you need to do is live your life and live it honestly enough for it to speak for itself

2018-10-24 07:00 Philippines Wednesday

#menstruation #poetry #photography #nighttime #daytime #subconscious #teach #write #love #learn #new #heart #pain #agony #happiness #worth #grow up #self-hate #self-obsession #chrono2

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