#but gods.... sesame street... and i found out i Do have a way to get from the train station to there...

[silver-ink-iron-words]

Outside the Know, Part 2

A/N - So, multiple people were asking for a continuation of Part 1 in the comments and reblogs. Thank you so much to those who expressed interest! I seriously wasn’t expecting that snippet to get the attention that it did

Though, going forward, if you’d like a continuation, could you please send me an ask? I find those are easier to keep track of than reblog tags

------------------

Part 1

It only took a little bit of digging to find the rock the civilian had been living under.

Heroes were usually harder to track; they had both the motive and the resources to keep their identities hidden. But civilians never imagined that nefarious actors could ever be interested in them.

Thanks to the villain’s subordinates – a pair of talented young hackers they’d snatched up before law enforcement could – they soon had a stack of tax forms, medical records, and printed out social media posts sitting on their desk.

With context, it was clear why the civilian had been so out of the loop.

As the villain suspected, the civilian was outrageously underpaid, and they worked long hours to make ends meet. They also lived with their sister and her young kid. The villain didn’t have any children, but they’d met enough couples with kids to know that if the civilian was even marginally involved in raising the child, it would take up a substantial portion of their time and attention.

Plus, if the sister’s facebook photos were anything to go by, the TV was typically dominated by PAW Patrol and Sesame Street. The evening news probably wasn’t on very often.

This all explained why the civilian didn’t recognize them, but a more grating question remained.

The villain had a few supporters – mostly communist twitter-users with anime profile pics – but almost everyone thought they were too extreme. So, in a city full of people ready to lick the heroes’ boots, why had the civilian been more hesitant?

The villain was itching to know, and the answer wasn’t going to be found in any of these documents.

_ _ _

When the civilian stepped out of their local coffee shop, they collided face-first with another person. Hot coffee spilled all over their front. They sucked in air, probably to keep from cursing.

“Oh my god! I’m so sorry! Here, I have napkins in my . . . wait, [Civilian]?” The villain whipped off their sunglasses, their expression a perfect image of surprise.

“Radi– ” the civilian started, but the villain clapped a hand over their mouth before they could finish.

At the civilian’s look of hurt confusion, the villain pulled back their hand. “Sorry, sorry,” they said, replacing their sunglasses. “I’m kind of undercover at the moment. It’s my day off.”

“What a coincidence,” the civilian said with a smile. “It’s my day off too.”

The villain wore a look of astonished delight that, frankly, should have won them an Oscar. “What? No way! What are the chances?”

The villain had to practically beg the civilian to let them buy them another coffee. The civilian was irritatingly resistant, forcing them to lay it on thick.

“Please,” they said, already directing the civilian back into the shop. “I might actually die of guilt if you don’t let me make it up to you.”

“Wow,” the civilian said, raising their brows. “You’re such a nice person, you know that?”

Ten minutes later, the two of them were sitting on a secluded park bench with a coffee in each hand and a couple apple cider donuts – the civilian’s favorite, according to instagram – between them. The villain let their conversation dance over the pleasantries and surface-level catching up of a typical run-in, before they advanced with their agenda.

“So [Civilian], I’m curious. I know you don’t care as much about us heroes. But what do you think of villains?”

“Huh?”

“You know, villains. Like the one who robbed a museum last week.” They took a sip, remembering. Though the civilian wouldn’t appreciate it, that heist had been some of the villain’s best work.

“Oh. Well. I think they’re pretty cool.”

The villain spat out their coffee.

“Hey, you okay there?” the civilian said, patting the villain’s back as they coughed.

“Yeah, yeah, I’m good,” the villain said, waving them away. “But what do you mean by ‘pretty cool’?”

The civilian’s mouth hung open slightly, horror dawning on their face. “Oh no. That was a stupid thing to say, wasn’t it? They’re probably your arch enemy.”

“No, no, I’m not offended.”

“I’m sorry. It’s just . . . you’re so open and honest. You make me want to be as well.”

The villain wasn’t going to dwell on that. “Okay, but I’m still curious, what did you mean when you said that?”

The civilian paused, and the villain was afraid they were going to clam up. But then they shrugged and said, “It’s hard to explain. And, as we’ve established, I’m not the most well-informed. But, I don’t know, I just hear things. Like how they mainly target billionaires, and try to shine a light on corruption. It almost feels like they’re fighting for people like me.” They smiled, and the villain noticed they had dimples. “If someone stood up for you, wouldn’t you like them, just a little bit?”

“Yes.” The villain was staring directly at the civilian. “Yes, I think I would.”

_ _ _

It had been easy to find information on the civilian, and it was even easier to keep tabs on them. Which is why, when the civilian was in danger, the villain was notified that very same hour.

Part 3

#villain #villain x civilian #civilian #civilian x villain #snippet #writing snippet #writeblr #heroes and villains #villains and heroes #hero x villain #villain x hero #not a prompt

[romericas]

do you think alfred ever guest-starred on mr. rogers' neighborhood?

oh, ABSOLUTELY

I think in the 70s Al actually guest-starred on a lot of children's television, doing his whole bit of "hi, I'm Al and I'm NASA's youngest* engineer! I directly helped put people on the moon, isn't that so cool? dream big, kids (and pls for the love of god get your parents to be willing to give us more funding so I can do more cool shit)"

I've said a couple of things about Al actually having been a stage performer from the end of the 19th century until about the 50s when he started draft-dodging, and to be clear, he was actively dodging the draft the entire time he was guest-starring on television, he just didn't really care about his government catching him as he has a big soft spot for kids and really likes performing. like he was totally on mr. rogers, scooby-doo, the big blue marble (many, many times), sesame street, josie and the pussy cats, like you name it he was on it. his favorite was the muppet show because i'm biased it was his first time being around other people who also weren't human and also weren't nations (I can't find the article right now but it's often reported that people who work with the muppets forget they're puppets the majority of the time), plus they all matched his level of resting chaos really well

he didn't stop until Matt found out and yelled at him for going on TV for a literal decade straight while visibly not aging and also always saying he's anywhere from 24-27 (sometimes going on one show saying he's older and the next week an episode for a different show on the same network airing with him saying he's younger), like in a "you idiot, you keep draft dodging at my house while still going on TV" type of way

#I was raised on early 00s cartoon network where they did re-runs of shows from the 70s bc my grandma knew they were safe lol #but also alfred is the biggest theatre nerd (and in general nerd) in my head and that is not limited to stage performing #that all is to say that I have way too many thoughts about this #gremlins-hotel #.asks #hws america #my hcs

[ink-flavored]

opal & emerald for the wip of your choice? :3

thank u friend!! I shall pick.......P&J because I want to

Emerald: Which of your characters is hardest to write?

Lust, hands down. I've ranted about it a few times, but trying to separate Lust-the-character, the abusive manipulative power-tripping asshole who gets killed after stalking Pride for most of the book, from lust-the-feeling, the perfectly fine and normal human response, I bang my head against the wall every time I have to write it.

My attempted solution is to throw out the virtue of chastity and replace it with passion (and show an Angel of Passion in the story), and to carefully craft the concept of lust in this story to be more akin to a "lust for power." It's not necessarily a horny thing, but an impulse that encourages you treat other people like purely disposable objects, things that exist to be used up and tossed away, on the way to getting what you want—and that can be anything, including sex, but it's not all sex or sexual impulse.

I don't want to turn to the camera and explain it to the readers like it's Sesame Street but god I am so worried that me writing Lust the way I do is going to come across as an All Sex Bad stand-in. Which is... not only not something I believe, but would also clash thematically with the extremely kinky sex that Pride and Justice have that I treat as 100% good and fine (because it is).

BWAH. I write myself into many corners and think way to hard about stuff.

Opal: What motivates your protagonist to complete their goal?

Pride's motivation and his goal shift from the beginning of the story to the end. At the start, he's trying to get one over on Heaven, give himself an eternal excuse to never go back to Hell, and prove himself the specialist smartest demon boy ever. Unknown to even himself, he's trying to show Heaven that he deserves their respect. He's tired of being stomped on, and thinks that smuggling a soul to Heaven that isn't supposed to be there is his best chance at being noticed again, for better or worse. Ultimately, he has only his own interests at heart, evidenced by him gleefully maiming every angel he comes across in his prison break despite Justice (the only guy willing to help him in all of Heaven OR Hell) asking him to keep it subtle and not hurt anyone..

By the end, though, he doesn't care about Hell, Heaven's respect, or even his contract with that Purgatory soul. Outside of completing so he doesn't die, Pride's only motivation for going back to Heaven to get it over with so he can stay a human on Earth for the rest of his life. He already found the love and respect he desperately wanted from Heaven and God. He found it on Earth, with his friends and Justice and in himself. The humans he used to despise become his inspiration to live independently from his past trauma. He's still in it for himself, but for the goal of living for himself for the first time, not his ego.

[send me a gemstone themed ask]

#annika talks #answered #ask game #P&J #Pride & Justice

[for-thosewhocare]

The A List

I’ve been rewatching the A list and Oh My God.

I remember why I loved it so much. The dynamics and plot is what made me so invested. From the title and cover, you would have no idea what this show would be about. It’s a mystery from the start.

I do believe this is one of Netflix is a last shows targeted at the age group between 10 to about 15 where they’re too young to watch things like Euphoria and 13 Reasons Why but they don’t wanna watch Dora. And let’s be real, shows towards that age group get canceled quick, look at Julie and the phantoms for instance. Be honest, kids shows that aren’t like blow up bubble guppies and Sesame Street don’t really get as much attention. It’s like there’s no market for them at all.

Keep in mind I could be wrong. I don’t know every show that it’s on Netflix catalog but I do know what gets pushed and it’s not the family friendly shows.

But getting back to the A-list, the show itself has an amazing plot filled with mystery turns and a little bit of drama. But paired with that it’s also immensely diverse. I don’t believe the show is part of the representation matters collection that Netflix has, but it should be it even found a way to portray a healthy LGBTQ plus relationship without that being those characters main personality traits and still allowing for them to be a part of the plot outside of their sexuality. That is exactly how it should be because being gay is not a personality trait rather than a part of your identity but that’s neither here nor there. Not only that, but it does have characters of many races and ethnicities and I don’t think that that should be ignored.

The show also even made me finally have a main character that I dislike. I typically find a little bit to like an every main character but I don’t know something about Mia. She’s not exactly my favorite person in the world but she’s workable. I like the fact that you can see clear difference in her character development from the first season to the second season and unfortunately, there are only two seasons, 10 episodes each in the series. But in similarity to Mia, Amber is also equally unlikable. I don’t like the villain or the hero and that is very different for me. Usually I can find at least a little bit to like in a character and for those two characters I can find some moments where they are likable at least in the first season but overall they both suck. And make it even better. They both going out to the same boy, who is completely clueless, and it gets on my nerves BAD. But as for the background characters, I like them; They make the show very much worthwhile. I am not even talking about the gay ones.

I’m not gonna fully get into the characters in this review because I would like to do character reviews at some point in my busy schedule but let’s mostly talk about how I think shows like the A-list should get more attention from Netflix and Netflix’s viewers. I’m very disappointed they decided to cancel the showing a cliffhanger, and I do think that the show had a lot of potential artistically. Similar to The Greenhouse Academy, it does have painfully basic dialogue and I feel like they could have put a little bit more work into that and not continuously try to appeal to teenagers.

Besides that fact, it does have a good plot overall, I do believe that if the show was done by a company like HBO, they probably would’ve upped the antics a little bit and maybe it would’ve been less of a kid show but the dialogue would be way less painful to watch and I wouldn’t feel like I have to endure the bad parts.

With that said the show is what Disney wish they can put out. No hate to any of Disney shows. I just think that they think their viewers are idiots and you can see it in the dialogue that they put clearly little to no work into. Other than the dialogue, there is also things like the visuals and the outfit choices that I do like

They don’t dress their characters like adults they dress like teenagers. I can see any one of my friends wearing any of these outfit. They’re not something I would make fun of like in shake it up or some thing that would make me audibly gasped like in euphoria, but rather they seem like outfits that people from the ages of 13 to even 18 would wear.

Also, they are set in a seemingly realistic situation that a teenager could find themselves in. It’s just summer camp. The show was like Bunk’d on steroids. I feel like a lot of kids, especially in the US have had the experience of being sent camping at a summer camp. I mean not me, but a lot of kids have. The most I’ve been sent to our regular camps that are inside of schools but not camping but anyway, I digress.

The shots in the show are taken as if there’s someone watching them. It’s kind of like office style but less obvious. Within the shot, you can see leaves next to the camera or in the frame or they will take quick notice to food around and stuff like that I just appreciate the detailing of the camera work.

With that said…can we pay attention to the set?? The set itself has amazing earthy tones, as if it was an actual summer camp. I also like the fallen trees and the stumps that you can see around it and inside of the cabins they really put in detail, as if there were a group of teenage girls living in it. With that I also think that the make up that they put on the cast is realistic for teenage girls, because as someone who has gone out and been in nature environment, it didn’t stop me from putting on a little bit of eyeliner.

Overall, I would give the show a solid eight out of 10 because dialogue as you know is worth a lot for me and that’s the only thing that I see it missing mostly the only plot hole is that an occurrence because the show we are unfinished so I can’t even add that into the contrast of the entire show.

#the a list #netflix tv series #netflix #tv review #teen tv #for those who care #for those who need it #teen mind

[gaykarstaagforever]

It's weird to me that people are mad about Taylor Swift deepfakes NOW, when there have been a lot of these for some time now.

Some with her having sex with Sesame Street characters. Because someone needs that.

Is it only a big deal now because FOOBAWL was involved? Is this the only reason the South jolted up from their La-Z-boys, empty beer cans and empty pork rind packets flying, to proclaim that this is JUST NOW a crime against God and man? Because it tarnishes the sacred "men doing ball things, but not in a gay way"?

Or, at least, that's the only reason they found out about a thing that has been happening for awhile now, to lots of other people.

I guess if this gets Congress to act on it, fine. Not that that will stop anyone from making and posting these. But I suppose then US search engines will at least purge the links.

Republicans will just have to craft their bill carefully so making vulgar deepfakes to spread misinformation to steal elections will still be part of the proud tradition of uncensored free speech.

Or they can just let the Supreme Court declare that you are allowed to use computers to lie about Democrats because George Washington, shut up. Whatever we're doing going forward.

#taylor swift #deepfake #ai

[vibeforce]

achievements of the day: woke up, still alive, brushed teeth x2, took kk out, took morning meds, got some cookies down, was able to eat a granola bar, got a bit of hw done, took kk out, was able to eat sushi for dinner (!), tried to eat some gummy bears, watched tv w mom, took night meds, flossed, allowed myself to bawl as much as i needed to

#daily achievements #hoo boy i am Miserable! #May Quickly Approaches. #i am fucking broken about having to decline both seaw/orld and leg/oland. if ll tells me i have to wear a mask in suit for the time being - #then i have an easy outing #but gods.... sesame street... and i found out i Do have a way to get from the train station to there... #it fucking Breaks me. #and i just. gods i'm Struggling!! #i can barely eat and i keep getting to a point where i just genuinely can't even put food into my mouth. #and that is an incredibly inhuman feeling #and then to top it all off i can't look at myself in the mirror tonight 🙃 #i feel so Broken and inhuman and i just... if i don't get to do either sw or ll i am going to be so fuckin sad all summer until fall #and even then i don't know if i'll even be able to then... #also kk is mad at me and won't even let me near her tonight and the sky is cloudy and i couldn't see the moon... #not doing great. not doing great at all. but hey i'm still here so that's worth smth right?

[soulmate-game]

I was feeling angsty. Read at your own risk, there is very little comfort in this and a whole shit ton of hurt. Probably a bunch of emotional triggers, so seriously be careful guys.

—*—*—*—*—*

Liquid pain ran down her arm like poison, the slash in it burning hot and spreading it’s agony like an invisible waterfall inside her flesh. But she did not grip her bicep where the wound had been inflicted, her gaze blank as she forced herself to hide her turmoil behind glass eyes. Her brother’s snarling face was only inches in front of her own, his katana moving from her arm to her throat.

“Useless! To think we share any blood relation is humiliating!” He growled at her. She did not move, did not emote. Her blades fans, the weapon she was loved most, lay half-opened on the ground beside her. Abandoned. But she knew Damian’s sword would not kill her. Blood family was a bond that was not to be severed by murder unless ordered by Ra’s or justified by the murdered family member in question betraying the League. She had done nothing to betray the Shadows, and Ra’s would not waste time and energy, or the breath it would require, to order her death. Just as he would not waste the precious waters of the Pit to bring her back again. She would not die today, and she knew it.

Sure enough, it was only a few more insults in various languages before Damian Al-Ghul stepped back and scowled down at the blood on his blade. Her blood. “If you don’t even have the stomach for real combat, you do not belong here,” he spat.

“That is where we agree, Grandson,” Ra’s sharp voice echoed through the room, his beady eyes never once bothering to glance at his granddaughter. “Maria, you are hereby stripped of the name Al-Ghul. Banishment from the League is the only mercy you shall be granted for your dishonor on our blood. Be useful and use whatever is left of your mistake of a life to stay out of the League’s way. Shall I, Damian, or your mother ever see your face again, your burial will follow shortly after. Am I understood?”

“Yes Gr— yes, Ra’s Al-Ghul.”

—*—*—*—*—*

Maria Al-Ghul was seven years old when she was disowned and sent away from the League of Shadows without so much as a penny to her name. She was only allowed to take the change of clothes she carried, and one small backpack’s worth of items. Her mother— Talia— had watched vigilantly as she packed those items, assuring that Maria did not take anything of worth.

The girl traveled by foot, too small to get away with driving a vehicle. Unless she could manage to steal a motorbike— she knew how to adjust the seats and pedals on most models to accommodate her size. But she was far too far away from civilization for that.

She knew that most of the League expected her to die in the jungles that surrounded the temple. After all, there were ninjas scattered throughout it with strict orders to kill anyone who was not one of them. And Maria now fit that description.

But if there was one thing Maria knew better than anything else, it was how to hide. How to hide feelings, intentions, involuntary movements, or her whole body in almost any setting. She covered herself in mud, matted her hair with dirt and took off her shoes. Barefoot was always quieter, and her feet would be more sensitive to any change in terrain. She would have to move more slowly and be on the lookout for traps, ground litter that could harm her, or dangerous wildlife, but she would be much harder to track.

It took her a month, but she made it to her first Tibetan city alive and decently healthy. She begged for food for a day before snatching a child’s outfit off of some hanging laundry lines and stealing the first decent vehicle she found. It was an old moped, but it beat walking and was already built small. She made it work.

That was how she spent the majority of the next year. She traveled from town to town, stealing what she needed until she could earn money normally. She used that money to buy herself a fake identity, even if she had to use the skills she had hoped to never need again in order to afford it.

Marinette Shiwang was born when she was already eight years old.

It was only a year after her new identity was created when she bumped into a woman in a street market. That was nothing new, those places could get crowded. But when Marinette looked up and saw valuable bracelets and necklaces of gold and jade, she knew she needed at least one. The money she would get for it would have her living comfortably for a short while. So Marinette’s theft-experienced fingers darted out and unclasped one bracelet in a fluid movement. It took less than a second. She barely had the piece of jewelry in her hand before she started to take off, hoping to lose herself in the crowd.

But a small hand clamped around her shoulder, a sturdy thumb pressing against a very vulnerable spot right at the back of Marinette’s neck, at the base of her skull. A clear threat from somebody with experience.

The sweet voice that followed didn’t match the gesture at all.

“Oh, I need that back dear. It was a gift from my husband, you understand.”

Marinette did. She cared about survival more. The small girl twisted, knocking the hand away from her before it could do damage and darting down a side street. The woman followed. It took three hours, but Marinette decided she had finally lost her pursuer before slumping down in the tiny, closet-sized bedroom of her cheap apartment. Her eyes closed for only a second before the window opened, and the smell of newly-baked sesame buns filtered through.

It was the woman and a much taller, much more masculine man. He was practically a giant, reminding Marinette of a certain member of the League that she used to know. They were both smiling.

“My wife figured you would be more open to an exchange than just giving up the bracelet for free,” the man’s voice was deep and inviting. “You can eat as many buns as your stomach can handle, if you give it back.”

Marinette accepted. Mostly because of her fear for people who could track her to her home so easily, when she had been certain she had not been followed. The League has tuned her senses well, there was no way the couple had been close enough to see her when she made it to her apartment. Yet they were still there somehow. Then, it also had to do with the promise of food, and the heavenly smell of the food itself. And then, lastly, Marinette was tired. She didn’t like stealing, it was just a necessity. She would not hurt these people over a mere bracelet that she wished she didn’t have to take in the first place.

Useless, she thought. So much of a bleeding heart that she just gave up what could have paid for two months rent. Too soft to even protect herself. The Al-Ghuls has been right. She was a waste of space and time.

Marinette was ten years old when she became a Dupain-Cheng. Somehow, that strange, dangerous couple had become her new family. Not even she knew how. But she was grateful— they took her back to Paris with them and she didn’t have to worry about rent, or food, or money anymore.

She vowed, that day that she received her spacious attic bedroom, that she would repay them. She would make herself useful, for the first time in her life. She would stay out of their way, be the perfect most unobtrusive daughter ever. She would help in the bakery, keep a smile on her face so that they never doubted that they were doing a good job. So that they never wasted time worrying about her. She smiled, and laughed, and became successful for them. Competent and reliable even though her memories would sink into her dreams every day and make it near impossible to drag herself out of bed in the mornings.

And then, when Marinette Dupain-Cheng was thirteen, she was given a pair of magical earrings and a tiny fairy-god. And Tikki was thorough, at least. Diligent in her explanation. Marinette listened to every word, dread seeping in as she doubted her ability to carry out such an important task. Save a city? Defeat someone much more experienced and magically powerful than her?

Useless little Maria could never. Slightly less useless Marinette could never.

She was only ever meant to play a support role. Stay on the background and make everyone else shine, without ever succeeding in anything worth noting. That was who she was.

But then Tikki gave her the Warning. The catch that came with the Ladybug abilities, and Marinette felt the long-rusted determination in her begin to fire up again. Maybe she could be Ladybug. Maybe she could be useful, at least this once. At least for just this one scenario. She could fight and win the war against Hawkmoth, and that achievement alone could make her happy. Let her die knowing she did something worthwhile.

—*—*—*—*—*

Damian Wayne was seventeen when he and his family found out about the Paris Situation, and immediately went over to offer help. Damian Wayne was seventeen when he watched Ladybug stumble at the sight of him, and immediately run away. But the two of them were twins, and though twin telepathy might be a myth they always did have a certain instinct when it came to one another.

Damian Wayne was Seventeen when he said, aloud on the top of a random Parisian building and surrounded by his family—

“My sister is Ladybug.”

Damian didn’t wait for their reactions, having entirely forgotten about the existence of his father and brothers, before taking off after his spotted sibling.

—*—*—*—*—*

“I knew you were alive.”

In hindsight, those probably weren’t the best words for him to say when Maria clearly thought he was still an assassin.

Damian watched as Marinette spun to face him, her face so much more expressive than he remembered. He could actually see the resignation in the slump in her shoulders, he could feel the fear in her bluebell eyes. The eyes she was lucky enough to get from their father while he was cursed with their mother’s green irises. He used to envy that about her, especially after joining the BatClan. But now he only felt comfort when he looked into her eyes. Comfort that she was different than him, and always had been. In the best of ways.

He watched as his sister was enveloped by a bright flash of pink light, detransforming right in front of him. And without the mask, it was impossible to ignore the relation between them. She had their father’s eyes and nose where he had their mother’s, but other than that they were almost carbon copies of one another. Her blue-black hair was pulled back into twin braids though, something he noted distantly as oddly fitting. They suited her, he thought.

But all those thoughts instantly turned to dust as she dropped to her knees in front of him, head bowed in complete submission.

“Tom and Sabine are innocent,” she told him. “They adopted me out of nothing but goodwill, and they have been nothing but good to me. I never told them a single word about my origin, I swear it on our blood. They think I am just an orphan that was abandoned in Hong Kong—“

“Maria—“

“—so please, don’t harm them. I’m begging you. And there is no need for you to waste energy killing me. You are welcome to stay in Paris as long as no harm comes to Tom and Sabine, but just wait and watch. I know who Hawkmoth is, and our final plan is almost ready. I’ll have him taken down by next week. Just— wait until then, please. My death will take care of itself afterwards, but Paris deserves to be free, and killing me now will set this entire war against Hawkmoth back by at least a year. And I also need that time to pick my successor—“

“Maria! I am not here to kill you!” Damian had to yell to get her to stop babbling and begging. She froze, but didn’t dare to sit up or even raise her head. So Damian took the initiative and sat down on the ground with her, though he kept his distance so that he didn’t scare her too badly. He couldn’t blame her for her reaction, it had been ten years since they had seen one another and their parting hadn’t exactly been pleasant.

But he had changed a lot since then, matured a lot.

“I am completely disconnected from the League,” he admitted. Of the blurry memories he had of her, he did remember that being blunt was the best way to handle information with her. Beating around the bush had always done nothing but make her exceptionally nervous and jittery. Sure enough, his admission was enough to make her look up at him with disbelieving eyes. He risked a small grin. “I didn’t come in my old uniform, did I?” He gestured to himself in the bright Robin colors. Sure enough, Marinette’s rapid blinking proved his theory that she hadn’t even registered his clothing at all to be true. She had run as soon as she recognized his face.

But Marinette did not speak. She sat up a little, still eyeing him cautiously. But her silence helped him finally realize where they were— where she had led him.

The sounds of traffic and other big city noises were all muted, as if muffled by several layers of cloth. Shadows fell over them abundantly, and they were surrounded by dilapidated concrete walls.

She had brought him to an abandoned area far from any activity, where a body would take ages to find. She had then disarmed herself of her only weapon, her magic suit, and had gotten on the ground in total submission.

She had purposely given him the perfect setting to kill her, where there would be no witnesses and plenty of time before her body would be found for him to escape. That realization hit Damian square the chest, leaving him breathless for a moment.

“I am not here to kill anybody,” he reiterated, his voice noticeably much gentler than before. “Not you, not you adoptive parents, nobody. I left the league when I was eleven. Mother—“ he took a breath, but Maria deserved to know. “— she cloned me. Her clone killed me. He no longer exists, but that is of no consequence. She killed me, she and Grandfather disowned me when I made it clear I was not returning. Father— our father,” he was insistent as he leaned forward, not continuing until she met his gaze. “You remember who our father is, right? Bruce Wayne? Mother had dropped me off to be raised with him when I was ten, but of course it was all just one of her plots. It was her miscalculation though, because I ended up growing close to them. To Father and his adopted children. You would get along with Gra— with Dick, the best I think. Although T— Jason would also be a prime contender as your favorite brother, I think. He shares your love of motor bikes, if that hasn’t changed?” She just stared at him, clearly confused and experiencing a lot of feelings at once. He stayed silent for a moment to allow her to sort through them a little.

“I’m Robin now,” he made his voice quieter, but still easy for her to hear. “I’m a member of the Bats. I’m sure they would all welcome you, if you chose to meet them. Though be warned, they can be quite in—“

“Why are you doing this?” Marinette’s voice was barely above a whisper, Damian almost didn’t hear her. But he did, and fell silent. He watched as his sister licked her lips and tried to find the right words to say. “If what you say is true… you have a perfectly good family. Brothers, Father, a comfortable life. Why follow me then? Why offer me… any of that?”

Damian frowned. He didn’t remember Maria being so gloomy, but then again she had been raised to never show her emotions. Maybe, after years away from the temple like him, her true feelings were just easier for him to see now. Closer to the surface.

“I want to get to know you— to get to know my sister, again,” he told her. “Don’t tell them, but Father and the others have taught me to appreciate family. The way I treated you when we were children was not right, and though it was heavily influenced by Mother and Grandfather, I want to make up for it nonetheless. Maybe we can get to know the new us, together?”

Marinette’s eyes went wide with disbelief, but then she clenched her jaw and shook her head.

“We can’t.”

“... right, I understand if you do not forgive me. I didn’t even consider—“

“It isn’t that,” Marinette was quick to correct him. “When I said that my death will handle itself, I mean it, Damian. The Ladybug… the earrings that give me my powers, come with a price,” she absently ran her fingertips over the unassuming black studs in her ears. “If a Ladybug uses the miraculous for more than three years, the powers of Creation will demand to be balanced. Already, the Miraculous is powering itself on nothing but my life force now. Once I defeat Hawkmoth, there will be no need for Ladybug anymore. The moment I take the earrings off, they will cease keeping me alive.”

Damian’s face fell. No— no, that wasn’t right. He was finally able to find her, finally able to apologize and try to fix his past mistakes. This couldn’t be how the reunion went. This couldn’t—

“Not even the Lazarus Pits can bring me back from a Miraculous death,” Marinette went on. “So you and your family should go. You don’t need to be here when I—“ Marinette paused, gasping. “Damian, why are you crying?! Stop that!” Her voice became desperate, Marinette crawling over to him as quickly as she could and wiping away his tears as if they were something terrifying. Damian wasn’t sobbing or making any noise, it was just a silent stream of tears running down both cheeks as he stared at her wordlessly.

“I…” he finally managed to choke out. “I wanted to make up for everything. I wanted for us to be twins again, together.”

Marinette paused, worrying her bottom lip between her teeth. “I know a magic user who can erase your memories of me,” she offered. “But you don’t have to feel guilty for anything. You never said anything that wasn’t true.”

Damian’s green eyes widened. He had said nothing but cruel things to her, that last year they spent together as children. Did she really believe all of that? Did he and their childhood really affect her self worth this severely and irreversibly?

“Maria—“

“My name is Marinette, actually,” she corrected him with a small smile. “I’m not Maria Al-Ghul anymore. Marinette Dupain-Cheng is actually useful, Damian. I can actually do things right— I’m doing something right right now. Beating Hawkmoth will be the first worthwhile thing I’ve ever done, don’t you see? Once it’s all over, I will have brought honor back to our blood. I’ll have proved to you that I really am your twin, that I wasn’t a mistake. That I was born for a reason,” Marinette’s eyes got dreamy even as Damian just felt like he was impaled again, this time by a spike of ice rather than a sword. “And I’ll be able to die before I ruin it. It’s a perfect scenario.”

“A perfect scenario implies that nothing important is going to be lost,” Damian breathed. Marinette just blinked.

“Yeah, I know. That’s the plan. Defeat Hawkmoth, save Paris, and nobody dies.”

“But you’re going to die!” He growled. Marinette leaned back, bewildered by his violent reaction.

“Yeah, but it’s not like I actually matter. Nobody needs me. Tom and Sabine might be hurt for a while, but they will recover just fine. And it’s not like I have friends or any—“

“Stop worrying about other people, damnit!” Damian surged forward, grabbing her shoulders hard enough to bruise and shaking her a little. “Even back then! Even when we were seven, you threw down your blades because you were more worried about hurting me than you were about how Grandfather would react, even though you knew he would be tempted to kill you for what he thought was cowardice! You never put yourself first, and it’s finally starting to piss me off!”

“Damian—“

“No, listen to me!” He shook her again, his tear stained cheeks only making his glare all the more potent as he stared right into her eyes. “You are alive, and your life matters! You were never worthless or useless, you just didn’t fit what our abusive situation wanted of you. They wanted a cold hearted killer, a tool they could use, and you were always too warm hearted and clever to fit either of those goals. But I did, I was the killer they were looking for and the pawn they wanted. If anything, that makes you better than I ever was! I was too young and naive to see it back then, but I’m trying to make up for it now. You are my sister, whether you go by Maria or Marinette, Al-Ghul or Wayne or Dupain-Cheng, I don’t give a damn! And so help me, even if I have to surgically attach those earrings to your skin, I am not letting you die before you gain at least a modicum of respect for yourself. Do you understand me?”

A wet sniffle met his ears, and he pulled Marinette in for a hug. She returned it weakly, sniveling and sobbing into his cape.

“D-d-Damian?”

“Yes, Shaqiqa?”

Another sniffle.

“I-is it really o-okay for me to stay with you?”

“Of course.”

“I-is… is it really oka-ay for… for me to live?”

Damian’s arms tightened around her. “Always. Always, always.”

Marinette buried her face into his shoulder, taking a deep shuddering breath.

“Th-then… I wanna try.”

—*—*—*—*—*

Not sorry. Ha 😎

#mlb x dc #maribat #platonic daminette #bio!dad au #Bio!Dad Bruce Wayne #sibling Daminette #angst #heavy angst #hurt no comfort #or very little comfort anyway #ml x dc #platonic brucinette #twin AU

[bartletforamerica]

How the Bartlet Administration Reacts to COVID-19

Abbey: is not taking any chances. After losing the fight to get the President to retreat to the farm or Camp David, she gets him to agree to limit himself to the oval office and the residence, with as few in person meetings as possible. Even before they’ve pulled together a White House task force, she’s made sure that everything is being disinfected and that her entire schedule is either canceled or made virtual. Her staff is the first to be working from home (and oh boy does she scold if she finds out any of them did something she thinks is foolish), with most of the rest of the White House staff following shortly after. She makes it her mission to do PSAs on what people should be doing and even does a virtual Sesame Street collaboration to teach kids how to wash their hands.

Zoey: Is not super pleased to be stuck in the Residence 24/7. She’s doing classes from her bedroom, so yay to not having to get out of bed early, but she can tell people are super disappointed that her camera is set up so that she has only a blank wall behind her [it turns out the secret service is very touchy about where you take video calls]. She also gets officially hired and given a security clearance for the sole fact that she’s one of the only people allowed to be near her dad who is tech-literate. She ends up doing some of her reading on the couch in his office so that she's on hand for when he's supposed to be skyping with the senior staff and can't figure out what link to click. She spends a lot of time worrying about Ellie, who helping do research about the virus, and texting her friends.

The President: is not happy to be closed up away from people. He also thinks that Abbey is overreacting where he's concerned. He misses actually getting to be around the younger staff. He and Zoey do a cooking from home video at C.J.'s suggestion, so that the country can see he's alive and to encourage people to not go out. They make chili and fight over whether it needs more cumin or oregano while Abbey records it and pipes in from behind the camera. The country is treated to a history of chili and a diplomatic incident nearly happens because apparently Mexicans deny having any association with it, even though most food historians say it has Mexican roots. The flaming debate doesn't stop a second episode at Thanksgiving where the country is treated to the history of the yam and all the secret spices that go into the President's stuffing. A large portion of the country gives him flack for putting Oysters in his stuffing. [In a small bedroom in an Illinois apartment a woman finally figures out why Joe Bethersonsen sounded so familiar.]

Leo: moved into the Residence because there was no way he was going to talk the President off ledges via skype for however long this lasted. He can only do so much. Zoey helps him learn to use Skype and he finds himself missing Margaret desperately even when he spends most of the day with a computer dedicated to having her on Skype so he can turn to it and ask her questions. She insists he get exercise and eat healthy (something he thinks she’s collaborating with the first lady on behind his back—they say very similar things much of the time). He skypes with Mallory on Sunday mornings over breakfast in his room and they pretend they’re at a hotel having a fancy brunch.

Charlie: is not particularly happy. He got sent home with everyone else because he’s not particularly necessary to have on hand if the president isn’t going anywhere. He’s still getting paid and he does do some work (the most important bit being hanging out on the phone with the president so he can ramble about history so Zoey can get her own reading done, Leo can browbeat the staff, and the first lady can do her own job) but he’s been ordered by the president and first lady to focus on getting extra school done while he can.

Donna: started freaking out the first day there was a rumor of a new disease in China. Then the White House shut down and even senior staff got sent home unless they absolutely needed to be in the building (basically just C.J. and some of her staff). And her roommate (not the one she'd really liked, who had a cat, but one she hopes is only temporary) works for a GOP congressman who thinks the whole thing is a hoax and bans masks in his office, so Donna is not at all happy and spends time she should be working cleaning things her roommate touches and that's sixty percent of how she ends up living with Josh.

Josh: is struggling with not being allowed to leave the house on pain of the first lady taking him to task (something about his lungs and the bullet). Even when he was putting his nose to the grindstone to make it through college and law school, he liked being around people while he studied, so he was usually in the library or a cafe rather than his room. He works best when he can bounce ideas off people and take in new ideas. When he was grounded after surgery it absolutely sucked and that was why he drove everyone crazy calling them all the time. Yeah he was bored, but he was also lonely. Plus he's not the best with technology. He very nearly went on national tv with his boxers showing, if not for Donna skyping him beforehand and making sure he fixed the camera. Between needing not to be alone and needing his assistant to be able to actually help him, the invite for Donna to stay with him slips out when she's complaining about her roommate. She shows up two hours later with two suitcases of clothes and two suitcases with pasta, toilet paper, and flour.

Donna and Josh: are handling the pandemic much better now that they're together. Josh can bounce ideas off Donna without it tying up his phone line. And she can listen in on his calls to the various members of congress about the stimulus package that they're working on. It's an even better look at Josh's job than she had before, and while it makes some of her work harder to focus on, she feels like she understands some things better than she ever has before. Josh even starts listening to her about how to sway certain congressmembers to their side. When they're not working, Donna forces Josh to cook with her so they're not entirely subsisting on delivery. They tried making bread and managed to spill half a bag of flour on the floor in the process but they ate all of it, even though it tasted pretty bland. Josh finally got Donna into baseball when it came back. Toby spit out his beer when he was on speakerphone with them and he heard Donna accurately yelling at the Mets for screwing up. Donna wears Josh's clothes more than her own, since she doesn't have to be on camera most of the time. They're platonically sharing a bed because they haven't found a convertible sofa for his living room that they like, they say, and it doesn't make sense for one of them to sleep on the couch, which they say has a spring that makes it uncomfortable to sleep on, even though Donna lounges on it all day with no problem. They are absolutely not dating and so they tell all their friends.

C.J.: spends five minutes laughing every time she gets off the phone with Josh or Donna. She loves her friends but god they're so completely in denial. It does, however, give her a much needed break. Her job has always involved a lot of people and knowing what venue to meet them in to ensure that she gets or passes on the information she needs. COVID protocols mean no more one-on-one meetings with journalists in her office, no more gaggles following her through the halls. The press corps were not happy when they moved all briefings outside and insisted on face masks and shields in addition to everyone sitting six feet apart. She gets asked about the president's health at least once a day and they start doing weekly waving from the balconies just so the press corps can get footage of him, healthy and shouting down to Danny and some of the others. Someone makes a cartoon of the president in the tower, with Abbey as his dragon keeper and though no one is willing to justify a cartoon with a comment, privately C.J. thinks it's accurate. She's always admired Abbey's fierce protectiveness of her family, even when she doesn't agree with every way it expresses itself or when it interferes with C.J.'s job. She has to come up with new ways to push the White House agenda (keep the economy afloat, stay home, no, don't listen to the GOP governors or those running for the primary, those ideas are not good, go the fuck home and stop having parties) and while some work, others bomb. It would help if everyone would stay on message and not screw up.

Sam: would like to make it clear that he did not know how many people would be at that gathering. He thought he was going for an outdoor meal with just a few old friends who could help raise money for the democratic party, not a fifty-person birthday party. The media fallout nearly gets him fired. Instead he gets yelled at by C.J., then by the First Lady. Mallory even sends him a card about how stupid he was. He's pretty sure that having Donna around is the only reason that Josh hasn't made the same mistake by now. It had to have been a toss up as to which of the two of them would screw up. Sam just isn't lucky enough to have a Donna (Sam is very happy that Josh has a Donna, Sam just wants Josh to realize that he talks about Donna the same way most men talk about their wives, because it's really hard not to respond to "why do I put up with finding her hair clogging the shower drain" with "because you love her and can't live without her, stupid"). He instead has adopted a cat for company. It tries to scratch him every time he tries to pet it. Sam spends his days trying to find a way to say "fuck the economy until we've beaten the virus" in a way that is palatable to the American people while trying to remind Toby that they can't actually say that outright. This is not an easy task.

Toby: would like to tell most of the American public to shut up, stay indoors for two months, pretty much nobody excepted, and if you don't, then you get tossed out to sea. He's come within an inch of telling anti-mask people they deserve to get sick on the record and is strongly advocating that the federal government figure out a way to mandate that every person in the country, minus those with legitimate medical exceptions, get the vaccine as soon as possible. He is also about to get evicted because it turns out his neighbors do not appreciate having rubber balls bounced against the walls for hours on end. Apparently, the thud is rather annoying. He worries about everyone, though this is delivered brusquely. Out of everyone he's taking the new work from home situation the best. No one can pop in to distract him, or comment on his eating habits. And if he doesn't want to talk to someone, he can always turn his phone to silent and pretend not to have seen they called. He's not pleased the Yankees lost to the Rays (necessitating rooting for either the Dodgers or the Rays, one of which beat his team and the other which betrayed New York), but he can at least take solace in the fact that the Mets didn't even make the playoffs.

#the west wing #pandemic #covid #jed bartlet #president bartlet #abbey bartlet #zoey bartlet #josh lyman #donna moss #josh x donna #sam seaborn #cj cregg #toby ziegler #leo mcgarry #basically there are still dumb people even with a good administration #but they try #and abbey will make sure they stay safe or else #i think this theoretically slots in somewhere in season... three?

[demetriandelibinaryboyfriends]

Fake dating au where demetris on his third strike with the school counselor so when they're about to fight again he holds his hand instead. Hawk cant help but blush and counselor Blatt jumps to conclusions and tries to be overly accepting

PFFFFT okay this is fuckin great

Like I’m just imagining Demetri doing the PETTIEST bullshit to get back at Hawk for that destroying-his-science-project business, like he writes “COBRA KAI SUCKS” all over his locker in sharpie in cleverly-disguised handwriting or pours soda on Hawk’s karate equipment and tough dude sportsballs (because come ON--Eli’s had the same locker combination for years, and just because he’s badass now doesn’t mean it would occur to him to change it) or steals his portable hair gel so that the ‘hawk will be sad and sagging by 6th period, and as soon as Hawk catches on to what’s going on, it doesn’t take long for him to figure out who’s behind all this chicanery. And he fuckin goes RIGHT up to Demetri during the next passing period (he knows exactly what part of the school that little nerd is in because he figured out and memorized Demetri’s class schedule SOLELY for harassment purposes and not because he likes him or anything) like “BRO YOU WANNA GO YOU WANNA FUCKIN GO” and Demetri gets ready to fight like “COME AT ME ASSHOLE” and Demetri’s getting ready to throw the world’s meanest punch to start the brawl (because his douchebag ex-best-friend ain’t the only one who can strike first) when the accursed Counselor Blatt rounds the corner.

She turns and fixes an icy glare right on them, and Demetri has to think fast. He unclenches his fist mid-punch and wraps a hand around Eli’s wrist. Eli’s hand flexes out in surprise, and before he can react, Demetri’s fingers have found their way up his wrist and laced with his own. Hawk’s face goes redder than his (already, sadly, beginning to sag) mohawk.

And fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck. Hawk was absolutely not prepared for this. He absolutely was not prepared for the same goddamn helpless sensation of vertigo to hit as that time he held Demetri’s hand during Red Rover in the 6th grade (how in the hell did a couple of losers like them get invited to play, anyways? The teacher probably made the other kids include them or something). And Hawk fucking hates how warm and pleasant Demetri’s hand feels in his own, and how it fills him with the same hopeless longing that he hoped he could punch away into oblivion as soon as Kreese started training him.

But here comes that stupid-ass counselor, and something tells him that now is not the time to yank his hand away and slam Demetri into the lockers behind them, no matter how much he would like to.

“Demetri? Eli?” Counselor Blatt looks back and forth between the two of them, perplexed. “What’s this?”

“What’s what, Counselor Blatt?” Demetri pulls Hawk closer and swings his other arm around the shorter boy’s shoulders. Hawk can only bristle in barely-concealed rage.

“Did I just...see you about to punch Eli?” she continues. “When you’ve been to our seminar on respectful alternatives to physical aggression?”

“Oh no, you misunderstand!” Demetri laughs, and Hawk wants to smack him. God, his laugh is annoying. He’s annoying. Hawk wants to scream into a wall and he’s not sure why.

“I was just in a hurry to hold my boyfriend’s hand,” he goes on gleefully. “I haven’t seen him all day! Is that okay with you, Counselor Blatt?” He gives the counselor a challenging stare, and Hawk almost feels sorry for the woman and how utterly lost she is.

“I thought you were upset with Mr. Moskowitz here for ruining your science project,” Counselor Blatt says slowly.

“Oh, that?” Demetri snorts. “We were just on a little break. I think that was my indication that good ol’ Eli wasn’t taking it too well. But we worked everything out, and it’s alllll good now!”

He gives the counselor his most winning grin, and Hawk just turns to gape at him. Out of all the absurd directions Demetri could’ve taken this thing, framing him throwing a soccer ball across the cafeteria to smash Demetri’s project as a couple’s fight was one Hawk had not seen coming.

But then again...that did kind of let him off the hook, didn’t it? If all of his messing with Demetri was nothing but silly relationship drama. After all, Counselor Blatt hadn’t lifted a finger when the utter spectacle that was Kyler and Sam LaRusso’s breakup had ravaged the school’s gossip chain.

“You know, you really should be more accepting of LGBT relationships,” Hawk says, making a point to pull out the kicked puppy expression. “It’s hurtful enough that my boyfriend and I get as many stares as we do from other students.”

“I...! Well! I mean!” Counselor Blatt splutters, looking everywhere but their eyes. “I think it’s great you boys are able to...express yourselves so freely! I want this school to be an environment where students of all sexualities are able to be themselves. I’m so happy West Valley High is such a diverse place!” She smiles, brightly but still very confused.

“With all due respect, Counselor Blatt, we’re not just some token gay couple.” Hawk doesn’t let up on the puppy dog eyes. “We’re just two guys who love each other. That’s all. All we want is to be accepted for who we are.”

He feels Demetri stiffen beside him with surprise, but the grip on his hand and around his shoulder doesn’t loosen in the slightest.

Demetri’s really acting like he doesn’t want to let go. He’s really committing to this façade.

Makes sense. When they were in middle school, Demetri always tried to be the class clown--not that it ever worked. Eli would always cheer him up by insisting he had a natural talent for improv. The kid isn’t half bad at acting, he’ll admit.

“And...you are accepted!” Counselor Blatt reassures awkwardly. “I’m...sorry I misunderstood your relationship, boys. I should be better about checking my heterosexual privilege.”

“Not to worry!” Demetri says cheerily. “Anyone who works at being a good ally to the community is always appreciated!”

Hawk resists the urge to roll his eyes. What was this, a fucking gay Sesame Street episode?

“Sorry again, Demetri. Eli. Have a nice day.”

As soon as Counselor Blatt shuffles around the corner and out-of-sight, Hawk tears his hand away (as...reluctant as he admittedly is to do so. Feeling another hand curled around his made him feel calmer and safer than he had in months, no matter what utter pussy’s it was. Disgusting. Kreese would never train him again if he found out, that was for sure.). He shoves Demetri hard--not into the lockers, not in any way that’ll make a noise to be noticed, but enough to knock the wind out of that fucking runt.

“What the fuck was that?” Hawk snarls.

Demetri crosses his arms and glowers at him. “I just saved both of us from a month of detention. It was only so long before she figured out Cobra Kai’s the aggressor around here just as much as Miyagi-Do is.”

Hawk surges forward and tries to shove him again, but Demetri is ready this time and quickly blocks. “What the hell was your grand plan, anyways?” he scoffs. “Pick a fight with me in the middle of the school day?”

Demetri sighs, starting to back away. “Eli, Eli, Eli. I know you’ve got a good brain in there, buddy. Maybe start using it, if all the punches to the head haven’t messed it up too much.”

He taps his head a couple times before turning and disappearing into the throng of students around them. Hawk groans.

Mitch doesn’t make matters better as they walk away. “Dude, were you blushing?”

“Shut the fuck up, man! I was just fucking embarrassed!”

Bert sniggers. “I’ll say. Should I start planning the wedding?”

“Don’t make me fucking deck you! Look...he wanted to stay out of trouble, and I realized I could spin it to our advantage. So I did. We’re in the clear for now.”

“Yeah, only took a bit of...hand-to-hand combat,” Mitch snickers. “What’s next? Judo wrestling him in the janitor’s closet?” He and Bert break out in giggles, and Hawk shoots them both his most seething glare.

“If you mention any of this to Sensei Kreese, I will kill you,” Hawk growls.

“Fair enough,” Mitch says, shrugging. Bert nods in agreement.

Hawk reminds himself to wail especially hard on both of them during practice today.

#hawk x demetri #demetri x eli #binary boyfriends #hawkmeat #eli x demetri #demetri x hawk #elimetri #demetri cobra kai #eli moskowitz #counselor blatt #mitch cobra kai #bert cobra kai #cobra kai #cobra kai season 3 #hawk #demetri #eli #my askbox

[i-am-bitterly-jittery]

Simply Meant To Be (pt 2)

[Part 1]

You don’t need to read part 1 to read this one since that one is Roman backstory and this one is Janus backstory

Rating: teen

Word Count: 3456

Pairings: Remile, Moxiety kinda (they’re kids, but they’re soulmates so I guess it’s future moxiety), Roceit but only at the very end

Warnings: religion, religious cults, religious guilt, child abuse, internalized homophobia, childhood trauma, stalking, threats of kidnapping, throwing up, psychological warfare (?), paranoia, swearing

I think that’s everything

It’s worse than you’d expect after the first part, but not quite as bad as the warnings make it sound, but if any of the warnings make you uncomfortable then feel free to skip this part

I started with some religious stuff right off the bat, so I put the entire fic below the cut

~~~START~~~

When Janus was growing up, he was taught that the colorblindness that everyone was born with was a test from God. God created a beautiful world full of wonderful colors, then gave man the ability to view only a fraction of this beauty. The wicked ones searched selfishly for ways to see even more, but the humble ones were grateful for what little beauty they were given. 

Soulmates were frowned upon in the Community. Janus was taught from a young age that soulmates were a trick, sent by Satan to lead people away from God. Even those who met their soulmates by accident were expelled from the Community. 

As such, Janus never expected to see color — for a while he’d even dreaded the mere thought of it — so he taught himself to discern between shades of gray. He was very good at it, almost to the point that someone who could see color would be fooled into thinking Janus could too. 

The Elders were not very pleased with this skill, and the Community as a whole was torn as to whether it was a sin or not. They said it was a reflection of his desire to see colors, of his desire to stray from God. 

So Janus repented. He begged forgiveness and promised to abandon his skill. He was devoted to God and only God. 

That was a lie of course, Janus prided himself on his ability to discern shades of gray, but he didn’t see why that had to be mutually exclusive to being devoted to God. 

Pride was a sin, and so was lying, but they were lesser sins to the Community than soulmates and colors. God would forgive him. 

He lived in the Community for twenty years, rarely leaving the town and when he did it was only for a few hours. 

He carries a lot of baggage from those twenty years, but he’s doing his best to shoulder it, to not let it affect his relationships with those around him, to not let any of the Community’s teachings hurt his son. 

Sometimes the little voice in the back of his head told him he was being selfish. Janus always silenced this voice with one thought: there’s nothing wrong with a little selfishness. 

Janus started going to gay bars on Saturday nights to feed his selfishness. He was never looking for anything, he had a young son at home after all, but one time, he kissed a man — he threw up in the bathroom afterwards, but he still counted it as a victory. 

There was a teenager that lived in the apartment next to Janus and Virgil’s first home outside the Community, and they were always willing to watch Virgil for a few hours, even if Janus couldn’t afford to pay them much. Elliot was Janus’ first friend outside of the Community, probably his first real friend ever. 

Janus hit Virgil once. Virgil was about two and a half at the time, and he’d proudly told Janus that his favorite color was magenta — after the dog on Blue’s Clues — and Janus hadn’t even thought, he’d just slapped his own son across the face. In the Community, a slap on the face would be the least of a child’s concerns after saying such a thing, but this wasn’t the Community, and Janus was trying to be better than them. He’d been completely consumed by guilt before the tears even began forming in Virgil’s eyes. 

“I’m so sorry baby!” Janus apologized, pulling Virgil in for a tight hug and rocking back and forth in a soothing motion. Virgil easily accepted the hug, and that only made Janus feel worse. Virgil trusted him completely, and he’d betrayed that trust. Janus was going to be better; he was going to do better. He was never going to hurt Virgil again. “I’m so sorry darling. You didn’t do anything wrong. It was all my fault; I shouldn’t have done that. I did a very bad thing, I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay daddy. I forgive you.” Janus’ heart broke even more; he didn’t deserve forgiveness. He didn’t deserve this child. 

After Virgil went to bed that night, Janus searched the internet for therapists. Doctor Emile Picani came highly recommended, and after a brief email exchange, they agreed to help Janus, even though he couldn’t afford their usual rate. 

Picani was an… interesting character. They made several strange statements then told him that they were references to cartoons that Janus had never even heard of. TVs in the Community weren’t for children to use, and Virgil was only two, he mostly just watched Blue’s Clues, Dora the Explorer, and Sesame Street. After telling Picani that, they changed their references accordingly, telling Janus that they had their own two-year-old at home, and they were more than familiar with the kind of shows Virgil was watching. 

Picani didn’t think Janus was a bad person, which was a foreign thought for Janus, who was certain that he was going straight to Hell. They were good at finding ways to make the little voice in Janus’ head shut up. It took Janus a while to believe him, but it got a little easier every week. 

Over the years, Emile became his friend, and Janus was grateful to have them every day. 

Emile was the one who insisted that Janus let them throw a birthday party for Virgil’s 5th birthday. Birthday parties hadn’t been a thing in the Community, and even after he left, Janus mostly just celebrated Virgil’s birthday by getting him new clothes, a whole party was a completely foreign idea. 

But Janus had said yes and agreed to bring Virgil over to Emile’s place the following Saturday. The party, he’d been told, would just be Emile, Emile’s husband Remy, and their son Patton. That was good, neither Janus nor Virgil were very good in crowds. 

Of course, whether there was a crowd or not hardly mattered when Virgil had met Patton and informed Janus that “everything is prettier now!”, Janus had a panic attack either way. 

Virgil can see colors! That isn’t allowed, they’ll take him away! He’s only five he needs me! They won’t let me keep him! This is all wrong!

“-five, six, seven. Out, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight. In, two, three, four. Hold, two, three, four, five, six, seven. Out, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight. Good. Are you with me, Jan?”

“Yes,” Janus croaked. He was in a different room now, with only Emile. Virgil was nowhere to be seen. “Where’s Virgil!?”

“Breath, Janus. Virgil is in the living room with Remy and Patton. Remy is teaching them all the different colors.”

“They’re going to take him away!”

“No one’s going to take him away. There is absolutely nothing wrong with him meeting his soulmate. Everything is going to be okay.”

“I don’t want to lose him.”

“You’re not going to lose him. You’re not in the Community, there’s no reason anyone will take him away.”

“I’m sorry,” Janus apologized, wiping at his tears. “I probably scared the kids.”

“Would you like a hug?” Janus nodded. That was one of the nice things about being friends with Emile, they gave great hugs and gave them freely. “Virgil was a little concerned about you, but Patton didn’t notice. Remy’s with them now, they’re okay. Do you want to go join them?”

“Not yet.”

“Alright.” Emile allowed them to sit in silence for a while before speaking up again. “I’m proud of you.”

“Why?” Janus asked miserably. 

“Your son met his soulmate and you didn’t respond with anger, you didn’t repeat any of the Community’s teachings, it’s a big step for you.”

“It doesn't feel like a big step.”

“Well it is.” And that was that. 

Ten minutes later Janus was feeling up to joining the others. Virgil climbed into Janus’s lap as soon as he sat down, and having his son in his arms did wonders as far as calming himself down went. 

“This is my source material!” Virgil informed Patton and Remy happily. Patton accepted that information easily, but Remy shot Janus a bemused look. 

Janus shrugged in return. As soon as Virgil had started getting anywhere near being able to speak, Elliot started teaching him weird phrases in the hope that Virgil’s first word would be strange, some of them stuck. 

Virgil started babbling after that, telling Janus about how ‘Mr. Remy’ was teaching him about colors and soulmates. Internally, Janus was grateful that someone else had given Virgil the soulmate talk, someone who hadn’t grown up with a cynical and toxic view of soulmates. 

Other than the hiccup at the beginning, Virgil’s birthday party went pretty well. Patton was a very nice boy — though he’d have to be considering he was Emile’s kid — and Janus truly couldn’t have picked a better soulmate for Virgil if he tried. Patton seemed to have an absurd amount of emotional intelligence for a not-yet five-year-old, and when Virgil starts fatiguing towards the end of the night, Patton’s energy level changes appropriately. 

Janus headed home that night with a sleeping child, two new stuffed animals — one of Blue and one of Magenta — a box of Playdough, a Sesame Street coloring book with crayons — a last minute addition thrown in because of Virgil’s newfound colors — and newfound sense of peace. His son met his soulmate and nothing bad had happened. 

Play dates became a regular thing, and Janus was glad his son would already have one friend going into kindergarten in the fall. One of the kids’ favorite things to do during play dates was painting, and as a result, Janus found himself using his skill to baffle Remy with his ability to paint everything the correct color, even when Remy tried to trick him. Painting, however, was not particularly fun to Janus in and of itself, and wasn’t something he partook in when he and Virgil were at home. 

Remy was actually the one to suggest a different medium for Janus: makeup. Remy even allowed Janus to use him as a canvas, and Janus’ skills on a living canvas soon flourished. Often he would sit down to practice on Remy, and Virgil and Patton would do the same with Emile. Janus’ work would of course look a lot better in the end, but Emile vehemently claimed to love both looks equally. 

Eventually Janus started a YouTube channel dedicated to makeup tutorials. He always used Remy or Emile as models, appearing himself with contacts and half his face painted to look like a snake, hoping that was enough to obscure his identity in case anyone in the Community ever came across his channel. 

His channel became fairly popular, not enough for Janus to make a living from that alone, but he did make enough from the channel for it to pay for itself. He could afford better makeup brands, which meant he could make cooler designs, which made his channel more popular. It was going well. 

Until his mother showed up on his doorstep one day, nearly a decade since he’d last seen her. 

“Janus.”

“Mother.” He didn’t have anything to say to her. Not a thing. Ten years and he hadn’t once felt the need to reach out to her. 

“When are you going to stop this silly game and come home, Janus? We miss you, and this is no environment to raise Virgil in.” She gestured to Janus’ apartment, and Janus’ blood began to boil. 

“Well excuse me for not meeting your standards, mother, but as I recall, it wasn’t my choice to leave in the first place!”

“If this is about Emmaline-”

“It’s not just about Emmaline! Virgil and I are perfectly happy where we are, and I’m not about to go exposing him to your toxic-”

“TOXIC!? Janus Lysander Hadley you take that back this instant! I will not have you speaking about our faith that way!”

“It’s not my faith, mother, it’s yours, and it has no place in my home!”

He should have been expecting the slap, it was a common way for his mother to respond to anyone disagreeing with her, but it had been so long, the sharp sting on his cheek came as a complete surprise. 

“Step aside, Janus, I’m taking Virgil home whether you’re coming or not. You’re clearly not fit to raise a child.”

Her trying to push past Janus and into his apartment shook Janus out of his shocked stupor and he blocked her advance. 

“You’ve never been fit to raise a child in your life!” He hissed, pushing her away from the door. “Now kindly fuck off, mother, you aren’t welcome here!”

He slammed the door on her shocked face, and quickly locked the door, locked the deadbolt, and slid the door chain in place. As soon as the door was thoroughly locked, his mother started pounding on the door, the gravity of the situation sunk in, and his panic started mounting. 

His mother found him. She knew where he lived. She wanted to take Virgil from him. He yelled at his mother. She knew where he lived. He made her angry. She wanted to take Virgil from him. She knew where he lived!

“Sperm donor?”

His son’s voice snapped him out of his spiraling thoughts. Virgil was peeking out from behind the partition for the living room, where he wouldn’t have been visible from the door. He was clearly scared, because of course he was, his father had just had a screaming match with a woman he probably didn’t recognize outside their apartment, and said woman was proceeding to yelling abuse through the apartment door. It had to have more than a little unsettling for the ten-year-old. 

“It’s okay, mini me, everything’s going to be fine.” Janus crossed the room to pull his son into a hug. Virgil latched on to him immediately, shaking from stress. 

“I don’t want to go with her,” Virgil mumbled into Janus’s sweater. “She’s mean.”

“You don’t have to.” Janus tightened his arms around his son protectively. “You’re staying with me.”

Janus’ mother stopped pounding on the door eventually — presumably because one of the neighbors either threatened to call the police, or actually called the police — but Janus and Virgil’s nerves were both shot for the rest of the day, and they both ended up spending the night at the Picanis’. 

Janus didn’t see hide nor hair of his mother for weeks after the incident, but his paranoia levels were through the roof. He wouldn’t let Virgil be home alone anymore, instead having him go home with Patton after school, staying at the Picanis’ until Janus could pick him up. Every day when he got home he would search their apartment for anything out of place that would suggest that someone broke in, he even went as far as constructing minor booby traps for anyone who tried to root around through their things. 

“Janus — I’m saying this as your friend, and as a mental health professional — I’m concerned about you,” Emile told him one day when he came to pick up Virgil from their house. “You’ve been on edge for weeks, it’s not healthy, for you or for Virgil. He told me he’s been having nightmares, you know.”

“I know, I know! But I don’t know what to do!” Janus stressed, he was dangerously close to his breaking point, but he didn’t know how to stop it. 

“Have you considered moving?” Emile asked gently. “It’s clear you don’t feel safe here, maybe putting some more distance between you and your parents will ease your distress.”

“I can’t move; you guys live here. I can’t just take Virgil away from Patton, he’d be devastated.”

“I’m not saying move to Antarctica and become a hermit, we can visit, and Patton and Virgil can Skype. Yeah, it’ll be hard and both of them, but this is hard on them too. Janus, I think it’s important for you to feel safe in your own home, and you obviously don’t.”

“I don’t know…”

But a week later, Janus would be pushed over the edge. 

He came home from work — thankfully before picking Virgil up — to find his apartment door wide open. Cautiously, he searched the apartment for any intruders, but after twenty minutes he was confident that no one was around. 

There were a few things missing, mostly all of Virgil’s crayons and colored pencils, as well as his coloring books and some of the drawings he’d made that Janus had put on the fridge. There were also a few photos of Janus and Virgil missing from their frames, and a tile with Virgil’s baby handprint missing from the kitchen. And three of Janus’ booby traps had been sprung telling him that whomever broke into his apartment — presumably his mother — had opened the hall closet, the cabinet next to the fridge, and the medicine cabinet in the bathroom. 

As if that was bad enough, there, in plain sight on the dining room table was a copy of the Community’s version of the Bible. 

“We have to move.” Janus wasn’t sure how he ended up at the Picanis’; everything after finding the bible had been a panicked blur. All he knew was that he couldn’t stay at that apartment anymore. 

Moving was hard. Virgil didn’t like it, but he was afraid of their apartment too, and if Janus and Virgil just moved in with the Picanis — which Remy had suggested — then Janus’ parents would just start terrorizing them too, and Janus couldn’t have that. No, it was better that he and Virgil move away, not just to a new apartment, but to a new city, a new state even! Somewhere his parents wouldn’t find him or Virgil. 

They ended up moving to Florida, halfway across the country. Remy had a cousin in Florida, one that he swore up and down that Janus would love, and moving somewhere where he sort of knew someone was better than starting over from scratch a second time. 

Remy and Patton came with them to help them move and to allow Patton and Virgil to spend as much time together as they could. Emile stayed behind since they couldn’t reschedule all their appointments on such short notice. Emile did suggest a new therapist near Janus’ new home, and included a suggestion for Virgil too. 

Having Remy around for the moving process was good because he was able to parcel things out in ways that didn’t make Janus feel overwhelmed with the amount of work that went into moving. Having Patton around for the moving process was good because when all Virgil could see were negatives, Patton pointed out the positives and had a way of making Virgil begrudgingly agree to them. 

Part of the moving process was for Janus to change his and Virgil’s name in the hopes of throwing his parents off their scent. Since Virgil was taking the move so hard, Janus let him pick their new last name to make him feel better. Of course Virgil was beginning to enter his emo-pre-teen-angst phase, so he picked a name that was edgy and extra: Storm. 

Janus Storm. 

He sounded like a supervillain, but it made Virgil happy, and he could never resist anything that made Virgil happy. 

Before Remy and Patton went home, Remy introduced Janus and Virgil to his cousin: Thomas Sanders. Thomas owned a theater in town, and offered to let Janus use him as a model for his YouTube videos. He was alright; Virgil seemed to like him well enough, and Janus trusted Virgil’s instincts on these kinds of things. 

It was a teary goodbye when Remy and Patton went home, and Virgil refused to speak for the rest of the day, but once their plane touched down, Patton called on Remy’s phone, so maybe the distance wouldn’t be too bad. 

The Picanis came to visit for Virgil’s eleventh birthday since it occurred during Patton’s winter break. They ended up staying for almost a week.

Almost a year after Janus and Virgil moved to Florida, Thomas called Janus to tell him that the makeup artist at his theater quit, and that the job was Janus’ if he wanted it. 

Taking that job turned out to be the best decision of his life. 

“I’m Roman.”

The moment Janus had been dreading since he was a child was finally happening. The moment Janus had learned to be cautiously optimistic about was finally happening. 

Slowly, as though someone were carefully turning up the volume on a speaker, the monochrome world around Janus began to change, and he finally understood what Virgil meant by ‘everything is prettier’, because it was. It was wonderful and terrifying all at once. 

“Janus.”

~~~END~~~

Janus’ backstory wasn’t supposed to be quite this angsty but  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ here we are. It’s probably never going to get this heavy again

Let me know if I forgot to tag anything or put anything in the warnings

taglist:

@royalty-of-all-things-snuggly @pixelated-pineapple @northlight14 @mistythegenderqueermess @bluerosesbleedred @sevencrashing @awkwardjester @everythingisstardust

400 followers!! Thank you all 💜💜💜

#sanders sides #ts sanders sides #janus sanders #virgil sanders #Emile picani #remy sanders #remile #patton sanders #character thomas #kid virgil #momceit #platonic moxiety #future moxiety #princeit #roceit #fanfiction #fanfic #my writing #thursday writes #simply meant to be au #soulmate au #tw: cult mention #tw: religion #tw: child abuse

[wastelandcth]

sesame street - cth

summary: calum’s opportunity to flex the perks of his jobs comes in the form of a very familiar show to his family. 

anon requested: I remember Chrissy teigen posted about how John went onto the Sesame Street show and he got the characters to make a video saying hi to their daughter Luna who was obsessed with Sesame Street at the time. So what I wanted to request was something like that with cal where the guys go onto the show and he gets a video of them saying hi to Charlie or Ellie (or even them and dovey going with him to the show idk). The idea honestly just melts my little heart 

notes: i hope you guys enjoy the doves and their adventure to sesame street! this was a fun one to write and the banner took too long to make but it’s one of my favorites. 

masterlist || request || more doves

When the band had first gotten the offer to show up on the popular kid's show, they had all laughed it off and said they'd think about it. From experience, Calum knew this meant there was no way in hell that the band would be showing up on an episode of Sesame Street anytime soon. But as he watched said show on a rainy afternoon with his two kids, both of whom were so lost in the wonderful world of Elmo and his friends to even pay attention to him, he realized that maybe doing a skit with the puppets wouldn't be such a bad idea. 

So that's how Calum found himself in a studio with his three bandmates, watching as Big Bird walked past them on his way to set. Maybe it was the sleep he'd missed out on the past two days with Eloise being the ever-adventurous baby who kept sneaking out of her crib and crawling over to their bedroom at three in the morning, or the fact that everyone on set was too cheery for it to be nine in the morning, but Calum was grumpy. He'd been trying his best to keep the friendly smile on his face but it was getting harder and harder to do with every reshoot of a scene they were ordered to do. By the time their lunchbreak had rolled around, Calum never wanted to be in the same room as Elmo again. 

"Papa this place is so cool! Does Elmo really live here?" Charlie asked as he ran into Calum's arm, not too long after the band had been allowed to go on lunch, "Can I see his house? I brought him a drawing that Elly and I did."

One of the only reasons why Calum had agreed on doing the show, besides Dovey's constant badgering on the subject, had been how excited his two kids had been to hear the news. Charlie, who had been watching Sesame Street reruns on tv since he was a newborn, had practically begged both him and Dovey to take him on to the set the day of filming. He'd promised he'd be respectful of the filming crews and had even offered to clean his turtle's enclosure for a month straight if he was allowed to go on to the set. Eloise, who had hoped to see another celebrity on set beside her father, was still a sleepy mess who was snoring away on Dovey's shoulder when all three of them had shown up to visit him halfway through his day. 

"It's cool, huh bud? Maybe we can visit Elmo later, yeah? Why don't we grab some food and then we can go say hi?" Calum mumbled, earning a soft chuckle from his wife who could see right through him and could tell exactly just how sick he was of Elmo and his other felt friends. 

By the time lunch had come and gone with Eloise having woken up and Charlie telling her how they were going to meet Elmo and Big Bird, Calum had led his family back onto Sesame Street where his PA had been waiting for them with exciting news. If the Doves wanted to, the two kids could be in the episode during a background scene.  Charlie's gasp and the tugging on Calum's hand from Eloise had been the only convincing the two parents needed and it wasn't long before Dovey found herself off to the side of the set while she watched her two kids and their father move around with the puppets that she'd grown up with and that her kids were now going to be on tv with too. 

"And cut! That's a wrap!" the director called out as the scene ended and everyone cheered. 

Calum looked over to where his two kids stood, Eloise, telling Big Bird a very interesting story about her trip to New York to be here with him while Charlie looked at the large puppet in awe. He handed his bass off to be put back in its cage before he made his way over to Dovey, who looked on the verge of tears as she watched their kids. Calum's arm wrapped around her shoulder, pulling her into an embrace as he chuckled. 

"They were good, huh? Think we have a pair of actors in our family?" Calum asked as he pressed a kiss onto the crown of Dovey's head. 

"Oh god, they're already dramatic enough, Dove. I can't imagine them being actually actors. We're screwed." Dovey mumbled and laughed softly into his shoulder. 

"You want to meet Elmo, don't you?" Calum whispered and smirked as he looked down to meet his wife's eyes. 

"Oh my god, I never thought you would ask." Dovey chuckled and nodded, "He's a legend!" 

And as a day that had started with not enough coffee and a lot of puppets, Calum was more than happy to lead his wife to meet a red puppet who she'd been staring at while Calum had tried his best to not laugh while they filmed. And a few weeks later, when they were all sat in their living room watching the episode play out, Calum couldn't help but feel the pride in his heart as he watched his kids walk past him in the background, both of them happily skipping along with the other children on set towards Big Bird. It was a day that his family wasn't going to forget anytime soon, a framed picture of all of them on set framed and on display in the living room. 

taglist:  @hoodhoran @finelliine @moonlightcriess @dinosaursandsocks @mxgyver @calpops @karajaynetoday @notlukehemmo @calumrose @devilatmydoor @lyss-xo @lowkeyflop

#calum hood blurbs #calum hood imagines #calum hood fics #calum hood oneshots #calum hood x reader #calum hood #5sos fics #5sos blurbs #5sos imagines #5sos oneshots #5sos x reader #5sos #5 seconds of summer

[pawprintsmoon]

You and me, Part II

https://archiveofourown.org/works/30337365/chapters/74835990

Shit shit shit! Alex couldn’t find it anywhere. He had made sure that he put the box in the pocket of his special Gucci jacket, but now it wasn’t there. 

Alex had bought the ring about a month ago, days after their cancelled proposal plan at La Mar. Last week, he’d been concerned that the plain black box the ring came in was too boring. So naturally, he bought two new ring boxes, impulsively browsing etsy at 3am. 

First, he ordered a neon box covered in rhinestones that spelled out the word ‘love.’ It had seemed funny when he pressed ‘place your order,’ but not so much in retrospect. After another half hour of etsy-scrolling, he picked out a carved wooden box that he’d personalized with their initials engraved along with the word ‘forever.’ Kind of cheesy, but Alex was down with that.

When he searched in his half packed suitcase, he found the engraved wooden box tucked between his socks. It was empty. 

Perhaps in his struggle with indecision he had accidentally left the ring in its original black box? That must be it. However, that was a disastrous conclusion, because he had thrown the plain box away, along with the rhinestone one. Shit shit shit. He had to find it before their flight to London in the morning. Had they taken out the trash already?

That’s how Henry caught him: digging through the garbage on their kitchen floor, hair a mess, and face flushed red. 

“Er, am I living with the grouch?” Henry asked. Alex spared half a thought to be surprised that Henry watched Sesame Street as a kid.

“No!” Alex groaned. “Henry, just don’t ask me what I’m doing.”

“But you’ve got old coffee grounds on your pants and there’s dirty paper towels on the floor.”

“Stop, I can’t explain.”

“This is rather unhygienic, don’t you think?” Henry’s nose scrunched up, undoubtedly due to the old cheese wrappers and broccoli stems. “What are you looking for anyways?”

“Don’t ask.”

“This is unusual behavior, even for you,” Henry said. “ I’m concerned.”

There was no way in hell Henry would leave him in such a state. Besides, he was getting to the bottom of the trash can, no black box in sight. He needed help. It was quite the predicament, but the honest truth was that Alex was very challenged at finding things. When he was stressed like this, he could look right at something and not see it. Nora told him once that there was a 76% likelihood that he had undiagnosed ADHD. 

“Fine,” he said, after deliberating. “Did you take out the trash between today and yesterday?”

“Does it look like I took out the trash?’ Henry gestured to the nearly full trash can that Alex was refilling. “Dear lord. Fine, don’t tell me. But did you look in the trash and recycling in the office?”

“Oh my god, Henry,” Alex said, bouncing up and pecking Henry on the cheek. “You’re a genius!”

“Hardly.” Henry rolled his eyes and directed Alex to the sink to wash his hands. “But come on, I’ll help you because you are absolutely tragic. Bagsy the recycling.”

Unsure if this was a grave mistake, he followed Henry into their office. 

“You know you’ll have to tell me what we’re looking for,” said Henry as he pulled out the recycling and sat down. Alex followed suit, pulling out the trash can.

He thought fast and decided that a white lie was warranted. He certainly didn’t want to ask Henry to marry him while they were digging through garbage. “Okay, you can keep a secret, right? I got June some earrings for her birthday, and I think I accidentally threw them out.”

“June’s birthday isn’t for two months.”

“Well Henry,” Alex sassed, “some of us take good care of our big sisters.”

Henry responded with an eye roll. “Did you piss her off?”

“Sure, yeah, that!” Alex hastened to confirm. “Now get busy sweetcheeks, that recycling bin isn’t going to search itself. Little black jewelry box, and don’t you dare open it if you find it. Because, um, it’s a surprise and I’d hate to make you keep a secret.”

Henry grumbled but began to dig through dense flaps of cardboard and paper, destined to get a papercut. Alex was relieved to see that the office trash held less misplaced compost than the kitchen’s. Alex had no idea how long it took, but eventually Henry pulled out a small box, covered in rhinestones. 

“Ugh, no that’s not it,” said Alex. “Keep looking.”

“My god, Alex, she’d think this box is hilarious. You should use it.”

“You think it’s funny?” Alex asked. “I thought maybe it was kinda dumb.”

“Totally, it’s perfect.” Henry tossed him the bedazzled box. “So, what did you do to piss off June so bad?”

“Ha!” His mind raced. “What didn’t I do?”

“Well, yes, I suppose you can be a bit of a menace sometimes.”

“Exactly.”

If Henry looked suspicious, Alex pretended not to notice. In contrast, he sincerely didn’t notice the jewelry box lying in a pile of candy wrappers in front of him. Henry had apparently been checking Alex’s pile from across the room, because he leaned over and picked it up, showing Alex.

“It was literally right in front of you.”

“I was distracted!” 

“Of course you were.” Their fingers brushed as Henry handed him the box, and the chemistry was as powerful as it had been two years ago. They couldn’t help but kiss, briefly over the pile of old papers. 

“By the way,” Henry said, looking Alex in the eyes, “whatever those earrings look like, I’m sure she’ll love them.”

#rwrb #rwrb fanfic #fanfiction #red white and royal blue #first prince #henry fox mountchristen windsor #alex claremont diaz #you and me #ao3feed

[lovelessmotel]

Maddie has Mr April hanging in her closet much to chimneys amusement and embarrassment even though they’ve been married a few years 👀

It’s long past due, but they’re finally moving out of the apartment.

Amelia is three and has steadily outgrown her tiny room. What started as a walk in storage space had turned into a nursery, which then turned into a bedroom that Maddie and Chim’s baby girl was much too big for. As many memories as the place held, it was time to go.

Maddie’s sitting on their bed, surrounded by shoeboxes, photo albums, and other knick knacks she had found in the back of their bedroom closet. Most of them were Chim’s, but she had found a few things she remembers bringing when she moved in. A brown paper bag full of movie ticket stubs, old flowers she had pressed inbetween two pieces of carboard and forgot about, a photo album she brought from Pennsylvania.

Chim comes in, closing the door softly. “She’s asleep. Knew she needed a nap when she started to cry over Sesame Street being over for the day.” Maddie nods, throwing some lint bunnies and paper scraps into a garbage bag beside her. “How’s the clean out going?”

“Oh you know. Meant to be organizing but I’m getting distracted.” Chim moves some boxes, trying to find a place to sit on the bed. “Wait before you sit, I think there’s one more box on the top shelf that I can’t reach. Grab it?”

Chim reaches up into the closet, snatching the box she mentioned, pulling it towards him. He doesn’t notice the object on top until it’s too late, and it tumbles to the the ground, landing with a soft ‘smack’.

Chim looks down, a grin breaking out on his face as he recognizes what it is. “Oh my god. No way.”

Maddie cranes her neck, trying to see. “What? More photos?” Chim leans down setting the box on the ground and picking up his prize. When he stands up, Maddie’s face falls, her ears coloring.

“Maddie Buckley-Han, is this a copy of my firefighter calendar?”

“N-no? It must be yours?” Chim just shakes his head, rubbing dust off the front.

“Nope, I know where mine is, and I only kept one copy. This is yours.” Chim smiles, tongue between his teeth as he flips through the pages. “After all this time you kept it. You know we should-“ He stops when he gets to a certain month, and Maddie’s blush is on her cheeks now too. She know’s whats there, and in her defense, she never thought he’d see it. It was a moment of weakness, of absolute girlish ‘i have a crush’ excitment that she hadn’t felt in years. It felt like she was 16 again, hanging up magazine pictures of Leonardo DiCaprio on her wall, heart stickers stuck to the pages.

At the time she didn’t think anyone would ever see, much less Chim, much less did she think that he’d see it once they were married with a kid.

He turns the page to her, and somehow his smile is bigger than before.

“I gotta say, the artisty is very good.”

The hearts of varying shapes and sizes she doodled all over the blank calendar days are bad enough, but the heart with a swirly ‘M & C’, inside it is the worst culprit.

Maddie rubs her cheeks, trying to will her embarssment away. “Listen Buck bought it for me because he knew I thought you were cute and April’s just a nice month you know-“

“You thought I was cute?”

Maddie laughs at Chim’s smitten look, his soft smile and even softer eyes. “Chim we’re married.”

He sets the calendar on the bed, climbing up and into Maddie’s space. “Still. You thought I was cute.” He presses a kiss to her lips, smiling when Maddie moves her hand to cover his.

“And I still do.”

#madney #this is ya know not my most favorite thing ive ever written but i HAD to try

[sophieakatz]

Thursday Thoughts: My Top Ten Muppets

Listeners of NPR’s Pop Culture Happy Hour recently cast their votes to rank the best Muppets – an impossible decision, really. And yet, once the top ten list was read aloud on the podcast, I found myself completely unsurprised. It’s a list that made sense, a list of safe bets. It’s also an incredibly Muppet Show-heavy list, even though the competition was open to Muppets of all properties, including Sesame Street and my beloved Dark Crystal. The full top 25 list, available here, reveals that a few Sesame Street Muppets ranked in the teens, but still. We all know the top ten is where it’s at, and this top ten was neither creative nor representative. It struck me as a list of popular Muppets, not a list of the best Muppets. Most of my favorites weren’t on that list at all!

So, here’s my take on the ten best Muppets – and because I don’t believe in objective Muppet rankings, I want YOU to reblog this post and tell me your favorites!

10. Swedish Chef              

The Chef came in ninth on NPR’s rankings, and I gotta be honest, I’m on the same page with them on this one. Maybe it’s the fact that when he comes onscreen, there’s no way to predict how the sketch will end. Maybe it’s the bizarreness of human fingers on Muppet arms – and knowing that those arms indicate a frankly superhuman feat of teamwork going on under the table. Maybe it’s just the Popcorn video, which always brightens my mood. Whatever it is, the Swedish Chef is definitely tenth best.

9. Fozzie Bear

I like Fozzie. He’s an underdog, never giving up in his pursuit of fame and audience acclaim. And even though his whole shtick is that he can’t succeed – Statler and Waldorf always get bigger laughs during his bits – he objectively has succeeded, because he’s still around and making us laugh after all these years.

What puts Fozzie in the top ten for me, though, is that I genuinely find his jokes funny. Honestly. I really do. So maybe Fozzie Bear sketches don’t really work for me, but Fozzie Bear himself does.

8. Rosita

I mentioned my disappointment before in the “official” ranking’s lack of Sesame Street characters. Sure, the cast of The Muppet Show has had a notable cultural impact, but it would be a disservice to Muppetkind if we ignored the impact of their friends on Sesame Street.

I could never forget Rosita. She’s not the most popular Muppet; she’s never had a super catchy song or a roll-on-the-floor-laughing one-liner to rival the others’ success. But her “Spanish Word of the Day” segments have a permanent spot in my memory. She’s sweet, she’s sincere, and she’s an excellent friend to her more famous fellow Muppets. (And as a bilingual Muppet, she’s really hecking important – there’s an episode where she deals with some kids making fun of her accent, and it’s equal parts heartbreaking and heartwarming!)

7. Rowlf

While other Muppets have one-note personalities – see number 10 on this list above, and number 5 below – there’s also Muppets like Rowlf. He’s not an “Anything Muppet,” by any means – he’s a character in his own right – but Rowlf is a dog who rises to any occasion. He sits at the piano to bring both beautiful classical pieces and hilarious parodies to life, and it’s all music to my ears. He can be the Straight Man to more chaotic Muppets’ antics, but just one clip of “Veterinarian’s Hospital” proves that he’s got enough silliness in him to take center stage.

And all the while, no matter what role he’s playing, he’s still that chill dog I adore – calm and adorable, with that round black nose, those big fluffy paws, and those floppy ears just begging to be scratched.

6. Deethra

As much as I love the original Dark Crystal film, the Netflix prequel series Age of Resistance has one big thing going for it: its characters. The protagonists of this show draw me in and make me care, quickly and continually. And best among them all is Deet. Deethra the Gelfling – small and beautiful, kind and powerful. She cares wholeheartedly about the world around her, and that care begets a wisdom that balances out her naivete in fascinating ways.

Muppets are so often silly, and we love them for it. But Deet embodies the Muppets’ potential to tell a serious story, a potential we would be remiss to ignore.

5. Animal

Oh my god, Animal. If you want to talk about the sheer silliness of Muppets, you need to talk about Animal. There’s just no way around it. He’s loud – in both sound and color scheme. And he’s absolutely bonkers. I know every drummer has an Animal in them, and it’s likely that all humans do. We’re just not all comfortable with letting him out to play.

That’s what’s so great about watching Animal do his thing. He has no inhibitions; he is freedom, he is chaos. And he lets me feel a little freer by association.

4. Hup

I talked a bit about underdogs in the Fozzie Bear section above. There’s an essay to be written about the Muppet as underdog; it’s an essential Muppet quality. Muppets are characters you logically wouldn’t expect to succeed, but they persevere, nonetheless.

Hup is the underdog of Dark Crystal: Age of Resistance. He’s the Podling who wants to be a paladin. Dear god he’s adorable, dear god he’s funny, and dear god do you root for him (and his spoon) to save the day! Of all the characters in this show, he feels the most Muppety – and that’s why he’s higher on the list than Deet. He’s still a serious character in a serious story (when he cries… my goodness), but he’s got that classic Muppet spirit to him.

3. Elmo

You know, I just don’t get why Elmo gets such a bad rap. Is it that people think he’s annoying? Sure, he is! Muppets are objectively annoying characters – they all are. Yes, even the one you’re thinking of right now. But I fricking love Elmo. He’s joyful, he’s spirited, and he’s exploring the world around him in that carefree way only a child can – and he brings you along on that adventure! “Elmo’s World” is your world. “Elmo’s Song” is your song. Elmo’s laugh is fricking infectious. And yeah, I’m probably biased by nostalgia (my dad’s Elmo impression cracks me up to this day), but Elmo is a darn good Muppet and he deserves our respect and admiration.

2. SkekSil

On a completely different note… let’s talk about the Chamberlain. There aren’t really that many Muppet villains. There are plenty of Muppet henchmen, providing comic relief for a human actor who isn’t supposed to be seen as that much of a threat anyway. The Skeksis of Dark Crystal are a notable exception, and SkekSil, better known as the Chamberlain, stands out among them. He is evil and he is smart. I hate him, and at the same time, I am fascinated by him. He knows what he wants and how to get it, even though he’s nowhere near as strong as the other Skeksis. He is, in his own way, an underdog. He believes in himself, and he wields that confidence as a weapon, calmly explaining to his enemies why they should do what he wants. You just can’t look away. He’s an amazing character, embodying the dark side of Muppethood.

1. Cookie Monster

When my mom first shared that episode of Pop Culture Happy Hour with me, in which the hosts talked about their favorite Muppets, I first thought, “How could you decide?” And then Stephen Thompson said his favorite was Cookie Monster, and I shouted “YES!!!” out loud. Because he’s right – Cookie’s the best.

Cookie Monster is eternally funny, whether you’re five or fifty-five. Everything that comes out of his mouth is pure gold (“Why me not get royalties?”) He’s got the best songs – not only the classic “C is for Cookie,” but also “Me Want It (But Me Wait),” “Me Am What Me Am,” and the “Healthy Foods” rap. All the stuff I love about other Muppets on this list – the unpredictability, the ability to fit into any role a sketch requires, the lack of inhibitions, the confidence, the chaos, the unexpected moments of wisdom – he’s got it all. He’s irreplaceable, he’s lovable, and he’s the top of my Top Ten Muppets list.

#thursday thoughts #the muppets #muppets #top ten #listicles #the muppet show #sesame street #dark crystal #age of resistance #dark crystal age of resistance #the dark crystal #muppet #swedish chef #fozzie bear #rosita #rowlf #rowlf the dog #deet #deethra #animal #hup #elmo #skeksil #skeksis #the chamberlain #cookie monster

[theotheroccassionalfanficwriter]

The Antichrist Is a Perfectly Nice Human

Summary: Satan took one look at the human that was supposedly his spawn, the Adversary, Destroyer of Kings, Angel of the Bottomless Pit, Great Beast that is called Dragon, Prince of This World, Father of Lies, and Lord of Darkness and decided that you were an alright human.

Alternatively, the former Avatar of Wrath decided to screw over his successor by claiming to be him while up and about in the human world. Got a female human pregnant and had you, the Antichrist*, that had the Celestial Realm and Devildom panicking for an apocalypse that was scheduled way too early.

*not really but you were raised to be one

Tags: Good Omens AU, Sorta but not really, Comedy, Romance, Misunderstanding, Your Life is One Whole Gigantic Prank, First Love Mammon, End game Satan, non-binary reader because you get all the genders.

A/N: Sometimes I gotta write the content I want other people to write so I can read it ;w; 

Chapters: 1/3

[Chapter 1: The Beginning of a Joke]

-

0. The Fool in Reverse

The Earth as a Gemini was a complete and total bastard as far as most people in the know was concerned. Most people in this case, referred to God and his Heavenly Host, and the majority of Devildom’s upper echelon. You, however, had no negative nor positive opinion on Earth based on its astrological sign. Based on inhabitants however...it was best left unsaid.

The story or perhaps the start of the problem began when Ira, the Former Avatar of Wrath, was not resigned to the fact that he would have to step down easily and hand over his Throne to some upstart demon. Thus this particular crafty, bastard, and fearless former Avatar of Wrath decided to play a harmless prank* by deciding to create a Cambion and have it masquerade as the Antichrist that was not meant to be born until eons later on.

(*it was a harmless prank by both angelic and demonic standards had anyone from their logistics department was not an overworked  demon/angel and decided to launch an investigation instead of sending it directly to the higher-ups for them to decide on what to do)

Thus Ira, who was unfairly handsome, found a very willing and very enthusiastic Nun from the Holy Order of the Church of Satan in England, went and pretended to be Satan, the new Avatar of Wrath, had a very fun two month long vacation in the human world with the very willing and very enthusiastic Nun.

And thus nine months later, you were born. A perfectly healthy baby with pretty blue eyes. As Ira held you in his arms, he smiled gently and thanked the your Mother, the Nun for her contribution.

From that point on, your life became one whole prank to Heavenly Host and Devildom, however it mattered little to you who was born with a golden and diamond studded spoon on the mouth. You were, after all, much more interested on Sesame Street’s airtime.

1. The Magician

At the young and tender age of five, your Nanny Asmodeus was teaching you how to negotiate and get what you want. In the same vein, Brother Simeon, the Gardener was teaching you how to politely ask for what you want.

Both were adamant that you listen to them alone. Thus in the interest of fairness decided to do neither. And neither of them complained* when you told them of your decision and instead looked at you fondly and patted your head for a good job of being independent.

(*That was a lie, as the moment you were well asleep after Asmodeus’ nightly ritual of singing you to sleep, both had a very heated discussion in the Garden Shed with Solomon, your tutor, as a very happy spectator. It was the first time Solomon had seen Simeon quite angry)

Thus you slowly but skillfully learned how to be a leader, for the Army of Hell that you would lead as promised by Nanny Asmodeus, and learned how to make friends as Brother Simeon had said that all Great Leaders had friends they could trust. And so by the time you were 9, you were quite the charismatic child not only due to your upbringing but also the fact that you had inherited Ira’s charms.

And then you met Mammon, and all of their work went down the drain when you fell in love the first time.

2. The High Priestess in Reverse

Mammon had been curious to see what his younger brother’s supposed spawn was like. Thus he had decided to check you out and see how you were doing after being subtly influence by both realms in your formative years. Mammon had expected that you’d be a fascinating mix of cruelty and kindness, an oddity, and fairly attractive by human standards.

He had taken up the job of checking up on you as a pretense to fool around for most of the time and expected it to be an easy one.

None of his expectations were met except one; you were an oddity but you were not a fascinating mix of cruelty and kindness, and you were unfairly attractive by human standards.

Not of that mattered and paled in comparison by the fact that you had taken one look at him, professed your love, and invited him to your home. Thus he found himself living with you, in your large empty estate that only had your family servants and pets as your company.

“Mammon~ Do you want to go shopping in Dubai? Tokyo? or Las Vegas?” You asked him sweetly as you wrapped your arms on his biceps and pressed your chest on his arm*.

(*This was the result of all the years you've seen your Nanny Asmodeus jump Brother Simeon at all times of the day and how your Nanny Asmodeus would talk to Sir Solomon about your learning pace)

“Dubai!!” He quickly answered as he tried to gently pry you off him all the while battling with the heavy and scornful glares of your servants.

‘I’m innocent!’ He cried inside his mind and willed Lucifer to hear his desperate cries for relief.

His efforts were in vain. Lucifer did not hear his cries and neither was he able to pry you off. All he could do was mouth “Help!!!” to your servants as you stuck closer to him. 

He cursed Asmodeus in his mind and swore to screw him over for his current predicament.

The servants happily did as he requested and even helped him get out of the place to ran back to his onii-sama and cry about what happened.*

(*Lucifer pretended that he wasn't despairing for his little brothers' stupidity but ever since the Antichrist appeared, it was getting harder to do so. He tried to look at the bright side that Mammon no longer caused more debts and ignored Mammon's cries of not being a cradle robber.)

Your first love was quick to blossom and quick to wilt. But your heart never forgot Mammon and you ended up dating a few guys like him before throwing them away after one week.

3. The Empress in Reverse

You had, from the moment you formed your first observation, understood that your Mother was not your Mother in the sense that most people had a Mother. She was just someone who gave birth to you, occasionally asked about your day and made small painful talk.

Nanny Asmodeus had been more of a Mother to you than her, and you had taken to emulate most of Nanny Asmodeus' habits* up until Nanny was fired after getting caught with Brother Simeon and Sir Solomon.

You had not understood why they were fired because you had instictively, like all children with an environment as messy as yours beneath the surface, understood that the three were more of a parental figure than the ones that gave birth to you.

Nanny Asmodeus was your Mom.

Brother Simeon and Sir Solomon were your Dads.

And you had told your Mother so, in a strange mix of your parents teachings, in the blunt and honest negotiation for them to stay. And you were confident, and stupidly brave for a child because no one had ever denied you of what you truly wanted because you were the Young Master and you negotiated well.

That had been the first and only time you failed a negotiation. It had also been the first and only time that you cried and begged, totally unbefitting for a Prince of Hell but you had loved the three of them in whatever a way a child groomed to be the antichrist could. It had been useless and you had moved on quickly.*

(*That was well crafted act. You had shed all pretense with your Mother and stopped bothering with her. The same went for the Man that claimed to be your Dad. You had carried and nursed a grudge and swore that when your Army from Hell arrived they would be the first one example of your might.)

It had been hard, at first, to adjust living in a house devoid of them three. You had grown used to the fact that all three of them had welcomed you at all times. That Nanny Asmodeus would teach you how to care for your hair and doll you up however you want, that Sir Solomon would not mind your endless questions and let you read whatever books that caught your fancy and let you dabble in magic, that Brother Simeon didn't mind you getting dirty and running around with stray animals that visited the gardens.

But you learned how to live with it. And somewhere between them leaving, your first heart break, and managing your publishing company, you had made your peace with the fact that you had no warm home.

4. The Emperor

Diavolo didn't know what to do with the knowledge that he had accidentally brought the Antichrist to Devildom via his Exchange Student Program. Or the fact that you had just met your absentee father Satan. Or the fact that you had immediately demanded your Army after learning that this was Hell.

He wanted to go down to the Castle's basement and duel his old man. He just knew that this was just that bastard father of his plan to make his way to the throne harder.

"Hey! Don't ignore me the Adversary, Destroyer of Kings, Angel of the Bottomless Pit, Great Beast that is called Dragon, Prince of This World, Father of Lies,Spawn of Satan and Lord of Darkness!" You angrily demanded.

On the side he saw Beelzebub choked on his food, Asmodeus sweating nervously, and Lucifer glare. But Satan's expression was the most interesting as the Avatar had paled greatly and looked pained. Diavolo smiled and said,

"Your army still isn't prepared so why don't you study here for a while?"

"Hah? I'm already making money! Instead of studying why don't you just let me run a business?"

Diavolo took a look at Asmodeus and wondered whose influence was this*.

(*It was Solomon's and Mammon's but no one made that connection and chalked it up to spoiled upbringing.)

Diavolo knew when to retreat so he granted you your request and found yourself investing in a fashion magazine and secretly playing around with Devildom's stock market with Mammon by your side who had forgotten all past trauma* with your generous spending on him.

(*When you were back on your room and sleeping he had ran to Lucifer and cried about all the scornful accusations of laying his hand on his own niece. Lucifer compensated him with Goldie and decided to break out his 1600 Demonus Bottle)

You happily dreamed about Mammon and ignored the demon that had the same name as your absentee Father.

5. The Hierophant in Reverse

Ira had always known that he was not the best father considering that he was absent on your daily life and the fact that he made you because of a long prank he was playing on his successor. It hadn’t fazed him at all that you grew colder and more distant towards him and your birth mother after Asmodeus, Solomon, and that angel Simeon had to be fired.

He understood that part of you very well since you had inherited that from him. You had somehow managed to inherit all of his strengths and he was proud of that. Though he did wish you hadn't inherited your birth mother's tendency to love deeply. Love had no place in a demon's heart after all.

And he had told this to you once, long ago when your eyes had shined bright with all the youthful innocence human children had. And like true child of his, you had ignored him.

He had let you off that time.

Not this time though. You, for some Goddamned in explicable reason, were in Devildom. Hanging out with the still wet behind his ears Avatar of Greed, and the pathetic excuse for an Avatar of Gluttony. He could feel his wrath bubbling up at the way you were doting upon the two.

He had angrily left and decided to visit his Demon King. 

He didn’t like the way you were looking at that scum Mammon*.On the other side of the street, inside Cat’s Eye Cafe, was Satan who had seen all of this and knew that something was amiss with this whole Antichrist business and his supposed child that he never remembered fathering.

(* Ira, by demonic virtue, loathed all the New Generation of the Avatars by virtue of being associated with that upstart son of his King. Mammon getting the attention of his child however brought him to all new emotional plateau in the levels of Wrath and he did not like it one bit.)

6. The Lovers, and then in Reverse

You had found it fascinating, how the demon who shared the same name as your absentee father, looked pained whenever you talked to him. It was really amusing seeing him hold back in maiming you for yanking his metaphorical tail whenever opportunity struck. Lucifer had found it amusing and you had taken it as non-verbal agreement to carry on*.

(*Lucifer was amused by your stupidity of provoking Satan with his apparent slip-up. Not at the fact that Satan always had a pained looked at his face when talking to you.)

And then you saw him playing with cats, and you decided that he was someone you wanted to be friends with. You had told Nanny Asmodeus as much and he had replied,

“Oh Darling~, Are you sure?” 

And even if you knew that there was something off with his question, you had knew what you wanted,

“Yep.”

And your Nanny Asmodeus had promised to help you out in your grand quest of befriending Satan.*

(*The moment you went to sleep, he made his way to Purgatory Hall, magicked bottles of Demonus and fucking drank with the other two as he cried about how you were too kind to give his shit brother another chance, and then cried about how fast his baby had grown, and then proceeded to attempt fighting Satan while crying and shit faced drunk.)

Meanwhile, The Demon King in the Basement, was having the time of his life as he watched the gathering of his Avatars all of which were acting like Quetzalcoatl that lost their heads over the Antichrist for entirely different reasons. He glanced at Lucrum, his Avatar of Greed, who was ranting about how the Antichrist was playing around with Devildom’s stock market and economy and teaching what he failed to get Mammon to understand.

He smiled and turned an amused brow at Ira wondering how he was handling the mess he had made. He knew that as the Devil King, he could easily put a stop at this mess but seeing how even the Bastard Upstairs was running around like a headless Quetzalcoatl he decided not to. This would be a good learning lesson for everyone after all. Even if the prank would end in failure sooner or later.

7. The Chariot

Somehow without you noticing it, you had formed pacts with 4 demons. All of which were your Father’s colleague and your uncles. Which threw you off when you realize your pursuit of Mammon and cried at the unfairness of it all,

“Why are my Uncles so handsome and yet my Dad is like that!”

You ended up doing an informed* runaway and had a sleep over in Purgatory Hall with your Brother Simeon and Solomon, who was now your friend and mentor in all things.

(*You had politely asked Lucifer for permission to runaway, which threw him off his rhythm and made him agree, and once telling this to Brother Simeon, Solomon had laughed and cried about how good Simeon’s influence was in curbing demonic influences.)

Which somehow made its way back to your Shitty Bastard Father, Satan, who was standing in front of you, hair a pretentiously messed up, and clothes also pretentiously disheveled.

“Oh? You decided to talk to me?” You challenged, fueled by the fact that Solomon, Nanny Asmo, and Brother Simeon was behind you.

“Can’t Daddy, check on his precious child?”

“Get lost, Satan.”

And from behind you, Asmodeus mouthed, “What?!?”

Because he was quite sure that the one who stood in the door way was not his brother Satan the Avatar of Wrath, but Ira, the dethroned Avatar of Wrath.

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#obey me satan x reader #obey me satan x mc #satan x reader #satan x mc #mammon x reader #mammon x mc #obey me mammon #obey me