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#but god. fuck i'm upset
idk-bruh-20 · 1 year
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Tony, the futurist
Buckle in folks, I've had some thoughts and I'm about to make it ✨everyone's✨ problem.
Been thinking about Tony Stark, the futurist who saw the end of the world.
Tony, who in IM1 escapes kidnapping and torture and says, "I shouldn't be alive. Unless if was for a reason."
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who, in The Avengers, has this exchange with Bruce Banner:
Tony: You know, I've got a cluster of shrapnel, trying every second to crawl its way into my heart. This stops it. This little circle of light. It's part of me now, not just armor. It's a… terrible privilege. Bruce: But you can control it. Tony: Because I learned how. Bruce: It's different. Tony: Hey, I've read all about your accident. That much gamma exposure should've killed you. Bruce: So you're saying that the Hulk… the other guy… saved my life? That's nice. It's a nice sentiment. Saved it for what? Tony: I guess we'll find out. Bruce: You might not like that. Tony: You just might.
Right after this, Cap tells Tony, "You're not the guy to make the sacrifice play, to lay down on a wire and let the other guy crawl over you."
And then Tony flies a nuke into a wormhole, tries to call his girlfriend because he thinks these are his last moments, did not go in there expecting to survive.
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Although he survives, he witnesses an alien army so terrifying, so unbeatable, it gives him crippling PTSD nightmares and panic attacks, knowing they are not prepared to defend the earth.
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I'm thinking about Tony who, in AOU, gets manipulated by Wanda into witnessing his worst nightmare.
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Which, by the way, involves losing all of his newfound friends.
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Later, he has this exchange with Nick Fury:
Tony: And I'm the man who killed the Avengers. I saw it. I didn't tell the team, how could I? I saw them all dead, Nick. I felt it. The whole world, too. It's because of me. I wasn't ready. I didn't do all I could. Fury: The Maximoff girl, she's working you, Stark. Playing on your fear. Tony: I wasn't tricked, I was shown. It wasn't a nightmare, it was my legacy. The end of the path I started us on. Fury: You've come up with some pretty impressive inventions, Tony. War isn't one of them. Tony: I watched my friends die. You'd think that'd be as bad as it gets, right? Nope. Wasn't the worst part. Fury: The worst part is that you didn't.
Tony's worst fear is to survive in a world he's failed to save. He has to "do all [he] could" or else the future he's terrified of will happen and it will be his fault.
(Not to put too fine a point on it, but there's a reason why Tony and Peter are so compatible as mentor and mentee.)
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Tony's seen what's coming, and he's willing to do whatever it takes.
Here's the thing, though:
Tony doesn't actually want to die.
In AOU, when they're arguing about why he created Ultron, Tony says this to Cap:
"Isn't that the mission? Isn't that the 'why we fight'? So we get to go home?"
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He tells Bruce that the reason they should create Ultron is to have "peace in our time."
He tells Pepper that his constant tinkering, his inability to ever, ever rest is because he needs to keep her safe from the oncoming threat.
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Tony has a life he wants to protect, people he wants to keep safe. And, unlike the other Avengers, he knows exactly how impossible this will be to achieve.
Tony is the only Avenger who understands how severely outmatched they are. Maybe Thor understands the threat, but he has no ability to imagine losing.
Tony tries to get them to understand:
Tony: Recall that? A hostile alien army came charging through a hole in space. We're standing three hundred feet below it. We're the Avengers. We can bust arms dealers all the live long day, but, that up there? That's… that's the end game. How were you guys planning on beating that? Steve: Together. Tony: We'll lose. Steve: Then we'll do that together, too.
Well, they do lose. And they don't do it together.
And it turns out Tony was right about everything.
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He was right that he would survive to face his world that he'd failed to save.
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He was right that the Avengers would not be enough.
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He was right that Bruce's powers would be worthwhile someday.
And, apparently,
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some people think he was right that he was only alive for this reason.
Because, obviously, the only "reason" for someone like Tony Stark to be alive is to eventually sacrifice himself, right?
A character so traumatized can only find peace in death.
Right?
No.
Stop that.
Tony Stark may have been willing to risk his life for his family, but that doesn't mean he wanted that to be his end.
Remember when this happened?
Bruce: Saved it for what? Tony: I guess we'll find out. Bruce: You might not like that. Tony: You just might.
Bruce gets to live long enough to like his ending.
Remember when this happened?
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All Tony ever wanted to do was make the world a better place.
And, what about this?
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You're telling me that Yinsen didn't value family above all else?
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That he thought Tony should die and leave them behind?
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No.
Tony Stark is a futurist.
He is the Cassandra of the MCU. He warns the others constantly of the oncoming threat that only he, apparently, can see. (Even Thanos calls him "cursed with knowledge.")
No one believes him. Alone, he tries to prepare for the threat that he has witnessed. He sits with his nightmares and tries to find a way around them, constantly.
He builds a life worth living, finds people worth protecting, just like Yinsen told him to.
To protect the future, he does all he possibly can.
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Tony deserved to be part of the future too.
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hellishfig · 1 month
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just finished www #23: on your way, and i have many thoughts. all of them make me want to cry.
ame knowing as soon as she got back to the cottage that her actions had burned a bridge, not just with the citadel but with one of her best friends, and yet still needing to complete her tasks as the witch of the world's heart. the spirits she awakens so as not to leave the cottage untended or unprotected, and the way she asks and does not take. the note she leaves, should her friends make it there.
eursulon in the fire, followed by the man in black, who is a brother in the way all spirits are brethren, but not the sibling eursulon seeks. leaving through the burrow, fighting monstrosities, and seeing the citadel raze cities to ruin beside a jungle of rot. finding the tree. his tree. the tree that is emblazoned on his shield, his coat of arms, what he fights to protect. and inside... his sister. a family she made for herself.
and suvi. hurt but still afraid that ame will die if she stays. determined to not let that happen. conversations with steel where she says that another wizard said that the wizard sly lied, or did not tell the full truth. commiseration, but suvi holds back the full truth, and suspects steel of doing the same. an airship to fly north. to protect ame, yes. but the mage armor mean that no creature or spirit or witch will ever be able to touch her again. broken trust, if not broken love.
and through it all, the thread that the citadel represents a threat to the world's heart itself, and to all spirits beyond. the council of elders wishes to neutralize that threat. grandmother wren did not.
questions moving forward: what is the true purpose of the war on gaothmai being waged by the empire? why does kalaya's family look like suvi? is suvi going to have a villain arc? i have my theories, but i'll get into those in other posts.
thank you to the worlds beyond number cast and crew for giving us this incredible story. i'm so excited to see where you take us next.
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camellcat · 5 months
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I feel fucking crazy!!!!!!!!!!
(thinking about the way he convinced her he was still himself. his smile when she said his name. the way he said hello. the way he simply looked at her. how he had to act like everything was normal because he was so scared she was gonna leave him. the hurt when she asked him to change back, just exacerbating that fear even more. him trying to play it off as if he's totally fine with sending her home even though it's absolutely and utterly the last thing he'd ever want to do. his pride at finally getting her to smile, only to be immediately dashed when she snapped at him. the way he made the worst impression after that and scared the life out of her.
oh, just everything, all of it.)
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clownprince · 1 year
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God. Fuck. I just remembered... based on what Joker said in Dark Days about how the metal called to him when "he wasn't himself" (I have to assume this means his amnesiac era bc he was talking about how he died and then didn't) and based on how the cloning machine thing works and Batman's reaction after he came back... Joker probably remembers their encounter on the bench in #48 but Batman doesn't.
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buildarocketboys · 1 month
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Dear transmascs,
I love y'all, I appreciate your posts and find solidarity in your struggles. But please, PLEASE could you acknowledge that some (many) trans people who don't identify as transmasc share in the same struggles? Please could you acknowledge non-transmasc (afab) non-binary/genderqueer people in your posts that also affect them once in a while? Could you please NOT co-opt the death of a NON-BINARY trans person to talk about how transmascs are oppressed for being transmasculine? Like, yes, there are overlaps between transandrophobia and enbyphobia (and transmisogyny) and these are important to talk about but please realise that you can do this WITHOUT erasing non-binary people who do not identify as transmasc.
Idk maybe this seems like a non-issue to a lot of people but it's honestly deeply fucking upsetting to me, as an (afab) genderqueer person. I'm not saying you have to make all posts about transmasc people about non-binary people as well but please just. When something is ABOUT a non-binary person and that person doesn't explicitly identify as transmasc, please, please don't erase their identity and make it ONLY about the experience of being transmasc??
I'm so fucking tired.
Signed,
A genderqueer person
(btw if you come on this post being shitty about transmascs or talking about how transandrophobia isn't real or whatever, you're getting an instant block. This ain't about that, transandrophobia is real but so is enbyphobia/exorsexism.)
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mqkoeyes · 6 months
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OH MY GOD STOP EVERYONE STOP
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hauntedtotem · 7 months
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re-reading through the Jadusable wiki and I'm violently reminded how much I hate the creepypasta fandom for taking such a great series with interesting and deep characters and boiling it down to "edgy stoner gamer who is afraid of water"
Was going through keblris's character page specifically, and it's so disappointing that outside the ARG players, he's totally ignored.
You want someone with horror potential for creepypasta, there's your guy.
The actual story for B.E.N. is so fucking good and has so much potential but people are actively choosing to throw out the window
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satorus-gojo · 5 months
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seeing people praise the ending for attack on titan - or worse, er*mika and how "tragic" it is - is depressing
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imminent-danger-came · 5 months
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So, you know me, I'm a "Wukong knew what MK was the entire time" truther (which truly I just think is fact), and the chances of SWK being honest and telling MK his origins on his own terms just went WAY down with Nuwa being here.
Like, I always figured MK's origins were going to be a big part of next season, and that the reveal was going to be major, I just thought that the scroll was probably going to be the thing to do it—BUT MAYBE NOT. Like, Wukong withholds information. We know this about him, yet he's the one on the main cast who knows the most, and can actually reveal anything. But with Nuwa? Here's a whole other character who has some INFO. She'll know what's going on. Sorry Wukong, you're going to be too late in being open again.
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crabussy · 7 months
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everyone in my school loves to scream as louyd as they can on purpose to hurt me just because they can
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fbwzoo · 6 months
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Well. Bearded dragon ended up coming home with Jack last night due to work shift making it easy to just get him then.
Sometimes I hate being right. I'd been getting increasingly certain that this kiddo was gonna be in bad shape from the info and pictures we kept getting. Well. Let me introduce you to Ed.
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Yeah. Poor bub has moderate to severe MBD. He can't even lift himself off the ground really, and he moves by shuffling along on his belly, pulling himself with his front legs. His legs feel like undercooked noodles.
They dumped crickets in the 20g with him, so we moved him over to the 40g last night. Weird makeshift set up bc we didn't even have a lid yet, getting one today. Used the heat and (unused??) Uvb light they had for right now, getting proper stuff ASAP. He's got cloth puppy pads for the floor right now, which seems to work well. Soft, but stay put so he can move.
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Joel is getting greens this morning, Jack is getting the lid and some slate & bricks for a better basking spot. May have to do just the slate if he can't even get up a ramp right now, but hoping he can so it can double as a hide. He's dehydrated as well, so that's adding to his current struggle. We decided against trying to syringe him some water last night, to avoid stressing him more than he already was.
Jack's going to work on hydration today, and also calling the vet so we can get him in next week. We're expecting at least bloodwork, probably x-rays, and then we'll see what the vet thinks about the chances of improving his state. Honestly, euthanasia is on the table, but we're still hoping to avoid that. We'd really like to at least see how he responds to a proper set up & food, and if there's any improvement with some treatment time.
And I guess I'm eating my words, bc if we don't euthanize this bub, he's probably fucking staying now! He's going to be disabled to some degree for the rest of his life, and I suppose we could still likely find someone willing to take him, but it does add further complication.
My boys know me well though. Apparently they were already taking bets on how likely we were to keep him. 🤦 I chose my life partners well, I think.
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sophiethewitch1 · 14 days
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in my hater era
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kkujo · 7 months
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something i don't see people talking about is the way hyperfixations come in like stages and cycles like it's not just "i'm obsessed with this thing" it's like. euphoria from finding something new and it brings you so much joy and then as that initial dopamine rush wears off you start to get more and more down and feel isolated as you start to realise that no one else cares about it as much as you do and you feel silly for being so into it and the thoughts become repetitive and boring so you get more and more depressed and lonely and then you inevitably lose the hyperfix which leaves you drifting feeling miserable and hopeless until you start the cycle again. idk if i explained this well or if other people will understand but it brings genuine phases of euphoria and straight up depression and this is why i get annoyed when neurotypicals use words like hyperfixation to describe like, an interest. bc it's not. just an interest it becomes who you are and when you lose it it's like losing yourself and you spend so much energy thinking about it that it interrupts your daily life and it's so fucking draining 👍
#like if i see one more nt being like hyperfixation this hyperfixation that SHUT UP!! YOU HAVE AN INTEREST#talk to me when you stay up until 6am every night bc you can't fucking sleep bc ur thinking about it.#talk to me when you can't process emotions in a normal healthy way because you can only relate it back to your hyperfix#paired w madd especially it's IMPOSSIBLE to be normal about shit i swear 2 god because the second i'm upset or lonely it's straight back to#immersing myself in another world and being someone else and not facing my emotions instead letting 'someone else' deal with them#not just negative emotions yk it's anything it's fully immersive to the point i end up not knowing exactly who i am myself bc i'm rarely#myself in my head yk#and it's so isolating#and this is why i get mad when people use these terms lightly bc they don't fucking get it#oh you're hyperfixated? oh you're delusional? you're delulu? watch this#< guy who has delusions that all of his friends secretly hate him bc he's too insane abt xyz media and who feels alone bc no one else is as#into it even though it wouldn't be reasonable to expect them to be#like i'm constantly questioning whether all my friends are secretly against me & finding me annoying anytime i talk about it but it's fine#it's so fucking isolating#i'm not losing my hyperfix yet thank god but i am in the stage of like realisation where the initial euphoria has worn off and i'm like#fuck no one else gets it. no one else is thinking about it like i am. and it's so lonely#< like not to sound like 'i'm 14 and no one gets me' or i'm not like other girls or whatever 😭#it's not me being dramatic i genuinely. know that no one else is spending every waking moment thinking about the things i am the way i do#and it's so incredibly depressing i can't even explain it in a way that will make sense#because i want to talk about it so fucking bad and i can't. even to my friends and gf who always listen i end up feeling annoying#and then i get genuinely delusional not like tiktok girl voice delulu like i genuinely start questioning my entire reality#just if i talk about something a little too much#bc i'm convinced i'm fucking annoying and no one gets it and they're thinking bad things about me#but i know they wouldn't. but it feels like they are#idk#anyways !
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scroldie · 28 days
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goldie birthday in thiry minutes
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marley-manson · 2 months
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me after watching and reading a few essays about the pain of womanhood and its ubiquitous depiction in media: save me xena... xena... xena save me...
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cheriafreya · 18 days
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being a broke ass gamer is driving me 😀 C-R-A-Z-Y 😀
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