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fbfh · 1 year

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Francis Wilkerson crushing on (obsessing over) you hcs

wc: 1k

pairing: francis wilkerson x gn!babysitter!reader

warnings: (canon) obsessive behavior from francis but reader is into it (against their better judgement /hj), pinning against wall, begging, francis being pathetic for you /pos, reader is trying to be professional lol

summary: Francis knew his mom hired a new babysitter to look after his brothers, but he didn't expect you to be so... perfect. now he has an impossible to manage crush on you.

song rec: obsessed with you - the orion experience

a/n: oh look another obscure heartthrob there are no fics for!! literally how did we get the scene of hal telling the boys what their relationships will be like and that Francis canonically has that gene and have no one simp loudly for him. yes I know this show went off the air years ago and I don't care. also full disclosure, I haven't watched much malcolm in the middle but I think I have a pretty good grasp on the characters let me know if anyone's ooc lmao

@yesv01

Okay starting off strong

The scene

The Scene?????

Are you fucking kidding me???

So we know he's a bit of a trouble maker

That's putting it lightly

But the fact is Francis is not afraid to get his hands dirty

He is not at all afraid to get fucking messy

And you know having Lois as his mom is more than enough reason for him to be straight up feral

As Hal said, the men in their family have a habit that makes them a little unstable (and very desperate) in relationships

It's giving greek tragedy curse

So if you've ever wanted a hot slightly unhinged obsessive pathetic hot mess boyfriend

Francis is the one for you

Okay maybe boyfriend isn't quite the right word

He’s not “technically” your boyfriend yet

But he’s hellbent on getting there eventually

He just has to warm you up a little first

Prove that he would be such a good boyfriend that you couldn’t say no

He just has to really plead his case, tell you how he feels

He figures if he’s up front and honest, lays his cards on the table

If he tells you he’s fallen for you, all the amazing traits he admires about you and that he thinks you could have some great chemistry

That he’d really love to get to know you better

That he has a good shot at you agreeing to go on a date with him

It’s a solid plan

So he’s not sure how he ends up literally begging you on his knees, arms around your waist and kissing your stomach after getting rejected a dozen times in like two days

He thinks of something smart but every time he opens his mouth something erratic (and probably a red flag) comes out

He didn’t see this coming

No one did except Hal and Lois

Hal should start offering relationship tarot readings because in that minute and a half speech to his kids, he not only predicted Malcolm's first relationship

But Francis's too

He's hooked up before, had flings here and there

But he's never really liked anyone

Until he sees you, the new babysitter Lois hired

You're so sweet

You're responsible, make good grades, and actually have a modicum of common sense

Lois is hoping you're just what her boys need

Francis is often out of the house doing god knows what

One of the reasons Lois hired you to begin with

So it's a little while before Francis actually meets you

But when he does??

Holy hell brace yourself

When Francis sees you it changes his fucking brain chemistry

He grabs his brothers and is like "That's the babysitter???"

"Yeah??"

"So you just forgot to mention how hot they are???"

They did not expect this kind of reaction from him

He pays Dewey five bucks to sneak into your bag and see he can find out what body spray or lip gloss or cologne you use

Dewey somehow manages to get in and out of your bag without you noticing

“What’s it called?” Francis asks, needing to satisfy the burning urge to know what you smell like up close

“Twilight… twilight something.” Dewey says, trying to remember. “I think it was… twilight sedation. Yeah, that’s it.”

Francis looks over at you

“Twilight sedation…” he says dreamily

It’s twilight forest, but who’s counting

Francis needs to be around you as much as possible

Being home more than usual won’t be a problem, he thinks

He’s not responsible enough for Lois to let him watch his brothers unsupervised without utter chaos anyway, so it’s not like you’ll stop coming over

So now when you’re babysitting his brothers

When you’re making mac and cheese or helping them with their homework

He’ll find little moments to steal you away

Every time he fully intends to have a conversation with you

Banter, build a rapport, get to know you better

And every time he ends up shamelessly coming onto you

And usually ends with him pinning you to a wall begging you to let him kiss you

Just once

Please, just once, just one time

And every time you manage to slip away and go back to what you were doing

Helping his brothers with video game levels and homework

And every time, it leaves him wanting you more and more and more

You think he’s just messing with you at first

But you can’t deny the sincerity of his face and voice and body language

He’s burning for you

Aching for you

And it’s a little overwhelming to say the least

Especially with how out of the blue it is

You want to just have a normal conversation but always end up with him much closer to you than you expect

So you panic and slip away

And so begins the enticing game of cat and mouse between you that drives Francis even crazier for you than he thought was possible

Every time he promises himself he’ll play it cool, just be normal around you

And every time he ends up pinning you against the kitchen counter telling you what a good boyfriend he’ll be

Please just let him prove it

The logical part of your brain knows these should probably be red flags

But a smaller part of you wants to see

The logical part of your brain also knows that you absolutely should not date the son of the woman you’re babysitting for

Especially since (aside from Francis) this is the chillest cushiest babysitting job you’ve ever had

Lois was right, you’re exactly what her boys need

And since it’s impossible to get a babysitter, much less keep one, she’s paying you really well for this

So yeah

Dating her son would be a huge conflict of interest

You can’t

You absolutely cannot

But the one thing you failed to take into consideration is that you lowkey have horrible taste in men

So this thing building between you and Francis is really just a matter of time

Then things are really going to get crazy

#francis wilkerson #francis wilkerson x reader #malcolm in the middle #malcolm in the middle x reader

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blackswallowtailbutterfly · 1 year

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Things that are true at the same time

1) Romantic relationships are presented as the be all and end all of human relatonships, especially to women.

2) Given how other animals pair up, there is probably also a biological drive to find a mate.

3) Humans have proven time and time again that they will risk anything to have a chance at a romantic relationship, including external violence (for interracial relationships, homosexual relationships, relationships outside of marriage, any other relationship not approved of by family or the state) or internal violence (thousands of women are killed by their current or former husbands or boyfriends each year).

4) However, it is entirely possible for a human to have a fulfilling life without a romantic partner, and plenty of people have done so--women are at their happiest in their mid 80s, which is after the life expectancy of men.

5) Danger due to external violence and internal violence is not the same.

6) There is no social pressure to specifically be in a homosexual relationship while plenty exists specifically for a heterosexual relationship.

7) Opposite-sex-attracted women will often be shamed for their choice in relationships but it’s not to do with their opposite sex attraction.

8) Same-sex-attracted women will often be shamed specifically for their same sex attraction.

9) Even though OSA women are often shamed for having sex with men that people in their lives disapprove of, they are also shamed for not having sex with men, and lesbian women are shamed for not wanting to have sex with men at all.

10) When the risk is of external violence, it is the society that must change to accept relationships that are not inherently harmful (homosexual, interracial, etc.).

11) When the risk is of internal violence, the options are limited: A. have high standards and watch for red flags and hope you get lucky, or B. just don’t date.

12) Telling people to just not date regardless of the reason is not likely to be listened to.

13) That doesn’t mean it should never be said.

14) A small group of people on the internet telling you not to date someone with whom there’s a risk of internal violence is not the same as being threatened with external violence if you date someone.

15) The external societal pressure on women to date men far exceeds any “pressure” in radfem circles not to do so.

16) Telling you not to get a pet bear isn’t the same as telling you not to get a pet cat or dog. The latter might make it more difficult to find a place to rent (external). The former will literally be the one to destroy your home (internal).

17) Using misogynistic language isn’t cool, no matter who’s saying it to whom.

18) It’s also not nearly as commonly used in radblr as people are saying.

19) It doesn’t excuse homophobia or more misogyny as a response.

20) It is okay to take a break from this site sometimes. A lot of people here who are at odds would have a perfectly civil and productive discussion in person (not everyone, but a lot). Please take a walk outside, and put what you see here into context. No one on this website has any control of your life decisions.

Full disclosure: I am a heterosexual woman, I had sex with a man over the winter holidays. He is very likely the last man I will have any such relations with, but I trust him with my life and I will continue to have a handful of such encounters with him each year unless I feel I can’t trust him or he wants to stop. Nothing I read on radblr is going to change that. I had sex with him on Thanksgiving weekend too. And on the week I took off in the summer. I’ll probably have sex with him some time this spring. What radblr has done is validated my not feeling safe dating anymore men after my rape several years ago. My standards have raised considerably and I feel no shame for having them. I accept that I may never find a romantic life partner or have any children but realize a fulfilling life is still possible.

Take radblr as a balancing act: liberal men tell you to have sex with lots of men (and some women too as long as the men can watch) and that you’re a prude if you don’t, conservative men tell you to have sex with one man only and that you’re a slut if you have sex with more than one. Both tell you it’s wrong not to have sex with men at all (even nuns are called brides of Christ). Radblr simply says, hey, whether it’s one or it’s many, men are dangerous and it’s safer to not have anything to do with them. Difference is women in radblr have no power, external or internal, to enforce what they think you should do. Men do, both external and internal, and they use it frequently.

You can have sex with men if you want to have sex with men! You can date men and hope to find your unicorn, I hope you do too! But it’s no bad thing to hear, in what is a small space on the internet, “Hey, consider not doing this risky thing” in a sea of “Do this risky thing this way or else” and “No, do this risky thing this way or else”. It’s okay. It’s literally okay to be told “We don’t think you should do this” and still do it. And if the day comes where you don’t want to anymore, at least you know you have a--again--small place where people won’t shame you for that decision.

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paperclipninja · 5 months

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Time and memory

This is more a pondering out loud than any theory or idea I necessarily subscribe to at this point, but there's something about time and memory and the wackiness of both through season 2 that has me thinking and full disclosure: This is not a complete thought.

I have had this post sitting in my drafts for about a month because there's some connection my brain is almost making, but can't quite. And during that time a whole lot of ppl have delved further into the time and set/prop inconsistencies, so this post is a little bit sharing a whole lot of the metas I've had the pleasure of reading, and also an attempt to share my own thoughts on it all.

There are amazing posts delving into the time inconsistencies already (like The ineffable discontinuity of time in ALL of Good Omens season 2? and the other work @embracing-the-ineffable has linked in their pinned post that explores this and @indigovigilance's look at Continuity errors is another one).

Then @cobragardens points out these extremely sus time-related situations in 5 Good Omens Timefucks that Haunt me

Then others have pointed out inconsistencies in prop placement, costuming etc, such as They are out of order by @maufungi and @purplewillowchicken's observations about Crowley's chair in the bookshop

But then, THEN, Neil answered an ask about Crowley's knowledge that hand washing would become all the rage during the Edinburgh flashback and his response here (incl. the excerpt "Either [Crowley] has an understanding of science and the world, or he has visions of the future. Or he read up on the ineffable planning a long time ago. Your call") could indeed be very Gaiman-esque teasing or it perhaps a little bit of a hint.

When you take in how many time discrepancies or inconsistencies (whether this is prop or costume inconsistency/changes or timeline ones) there are throughout season 2 and consider that this is a show that is deliberate and fastidious in it's inclusion/exclusion of any details, it has to make you wonder.

Also, in the book of Good Omens, Crowley's watch shows the time for Another place as, "it's always too late" and it's stuck on one time. But in the series, we've never had reference to his watch in this way and the line, "It's always too late" said by Crowley in season 2, is, to me at least, quite ominous, almost defeated, like it's something he contends with often.

There is something about the way he says that line that struck me on first viewing and continues to on every subsequent watch. It's not just that the meaning is a little ambiguous; too late because Aziraphale is already in danger? Too late because they've always been in danger and they're simply staying one step ahead? Too late because no matter what Crowley and Aziraphale do, they're part of a bigger plan that they have no control over or ability to slow down? All of the above?

The way Crowley says, "it's always too late" comes across as quite personal to me. Like he feels responsible. Or, if we're going to go with some timey-wimey bendy-wendy stuff, it's like he keeps falling short of preventing or achieving something he's being trying to achieve for a long time. He sounds deflated.

And yes, it could be the constant looking over his shoulder and never finding peace, absolutely. As I said right off the bat, I don't necessarily believe what I'm writing is true, but more of a fun little "what if?"

There have been theories about time loops and the idea that Crowley (or everyone) is stuck in a loop, and I could see how memory could come into that. I don't necessarily think Crowley's memory has been tampered with by Heaven or Hell, but the idea that being in a loop impacts memory, and that each time he goes around it shifts or alters memories depending on what has been changed etc, totally tracks.

Part of me thinks that playing around with time loops etc is a bit out of GO universe, but then I remember that Crowley stops time and that is pretty darn significant, so anything's possible?

So what I'm throwing into the mix is this - what if time and memory, specifically Crowley's, are somehow connected? More specifically, his involvement in the creation of nebulae aka space, sort of attached him to different timelines? Or allowed him to travel through time in different ways?

Yes, this is whackadoo, but he can stop time, possibly manipulate it, what if he can jump around in it too? What if, just like Adam resetting the Earth, essentially setting it on a new trajectory and timeline, Crowley finds himself in different timelines at different times, trying to get to the one where Earth is safe, he and Aziraphale are safe, where it's not too late?

And what if he's either not aware of it or doesn't know which timeline he's ever in until it is too late? And that's why he doesn't recognise Saraqael and Furfur. Or, what if he has indeed seen the future and is desperately trying to alter the past to avert whatever he's seen? But in doing so, any changes mean that present Crowley doesn't remember these angels and demons he doesn't recognise, because they are a result of trying to alter the outcomes of the future?

I think this is all far too sci-fi and quite unlikely but, if I was going to humour myself a little more, the comment Crowley makes to Maggie and Nina, that he and Aziraphale have been talking for "millions of years" - I always took it at him just exaggerating the time they've known one another to make a point (which, honestly, I still think is the case). But if I wanted to support my own out there idea, arguably, if Crowley was travelling back and forth through time, trying to do whatever he's trying to do, then perhaps he really does have millions of years of conversations with Aziraphale under his belt?

And that's why sometimes props are different or in different places - something's been altered in the timeline and it flows into the present. Then of course there's the idea that the Metatron or God or some entity is manipulating time and messing with everything, again, maybe *insert shrug emoji here*?

Though I do keep coming back to Neil's comment about Crowley having visions of the future. Perhaps it's not so much travelling through time, as being able to see through time? I mean, there's the whole scene that never happened with the dream of the bookshop standing alone amidst destruction and while it's never been said whose dream it was, if I was a betting person, my money would be on Crowley. Ya know, the one who has visions of the future. Because Earth destroyed while the bookshop still stands would certainly explain the "it's always too late" comment too.

So that's the end of my half formed not-really thought. It seems ridiculous to write such a long post about something I'm not particularly convinced about, but I certainly agree there's something funky going on with time and the memory thing bugs me because it's not consistent enough to be a memory wipe situation (I don't think), but it's been made obvious enough we're meant to notice. Either that, or Crowley is just being a smartass which, honestly, is far more likely.

#good omens meta #good omens #crowley #this is a rambly ramble that sort of says nothing in the end tbh #because I cannot for the life of me quite land this thought #al I know is that something is up with time #and my brain wants to know what it means

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irregularcollapse · 5 months

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A Storm That Took Everything

Fic preview to celebrate Damen Love Fest 2023

Full disclosure: I hadn't intended to do anything for the Damen Love Fest being run by @damensource purely because I'm disorganised and can only focus on one thing at at time. But then beloved mutual @zumurruds convinced me (read: she literally just asked me) to contribute something, and I thought, "Well, I do have a whole lot of writing about Damen done already." So, to celebrate the Damen Love Fest, I'm going to release the first chapter of my current WIP, a gothic romance AU titled A Storm That Took Everything, in installments across the week. As a whole work, it addresses all of the Damen Love Fest prompts in some way—keep a keen eye open for these themes throughout the first chapter! The caveat I can't help adding is that it is very much still a draft, so by the time I post the full chapter on AO3, some changes may have been made! The completed chapter will also have footnotes relating to research/references for your readerly enjoyment xx Anyway! Without further ado, a little bit of Damen love, courtesy of the first part of Chapter I of my upcoming fic, A Storm That Took Everything.

Chapter I In Threes

The first sign is the goat. It had been invisible on one stretch of the wooded path, and then the turn is taken, and there it is: a thing of exposed bones and matted locks of wool—huge and horned, black coat long and appearing clogged with fungus, risen on its hind legs and stripping bark from a plane tree. The efforts are not easy, jerking and ragged movements, tearing and not shedding. It is so close to Damen’s path that if he were to veer his horse slightly, to lean across and reach out his arm, he could pull on its mouldy fur. He slows his mount to a trot as he passes, inexplicable thrill clamping around his throat, and continues down the path. With a glance over his shoulder, the goat slips away, camouflaged by the silver of the tree bark and the foggy green of the leaves.

Damen speeds up again.

This high up, in the hills of Ios, the riding paths are twisted. They wrap around the rock formations, following the lay of the land in a way that makes for an easy ascent but an attentive journey. Every other turn, Damen catches sight of the city through the trees: buildings lit gold in the morning light, the sparkling bay beyond. His sunrise habit, to ride to the clifftops before the day has fully dawned and the troubles of his schedule can set in—to clear his head, and ready it for his father’s office. On this morning, though, when he crests a particular crag and halts his horse to take in the view, as he often does, a sharp glare forces him to shield his eyes. His heart quickens once more—fire, across the city. The buildings, orange and ablaze; the bay, sparking not with turquoise glitter, but with waves like sharp knives. The wind, likely what has whipped the dry heat into an inferno, is incongruously cold as it chafes his exposed skin. Damen’s breath catches; he swallows; he blinks.

Ios is not aflame. It is the sun lighting on the stone, nothing more, the rays filtered odd and splintered through the scattered cloud cover. The tumult in the bay, only caused by what must be a polar wind migrating from colder climes. The seasons have shifted, after all, and winter looms.

He forces a laugh, admittedly as much to convince himself of his own stability as anything, patting at his horse’s neck as it patiently awaits setting off again. It wickers in response: are you quite finished with your overreactions? Some of us have oats and apples waiting. Damen gives it one more pat, before nudging it onward with his heels. Home, now. With the way his nerves are going, cutting the ride short seems necessary.

Sleep has been difficult. That has to be the reason; seeing the goat was unsettling, in short, but only because of the scant hours of rest and long hours of restless waking that have been darkening the bruises under Damen’s eyes day by day. Or, night by night. The goat on the hillside bore only a passing resemblance to the one in his dreams—the horns, the black coat. The phantasm that he sees sometimes is more shadow than creature, a blotted impression of a goat that he largely recognises because of the smell. This real beast had a form, and meat. It was fetid. Rot-ridden. A pitiable thing, on the doorstep of Death and inevitable decay.

No, Damen decides as he and his horse break through the trees and onto the field path that leads back to the city, the goats were not the same. His sleeplessness is playing tricks, as the light had played tricks to turn the city’s glow into a flame.

He assembles his smile and his posture for public, consciously loosening the grip of his gloved hands on the reigns. Not a moment too late; barely has he crossed the row of houses that back the field, when he passes two ladies dressed for the market, and has cause to tip his hat. He attempts a genial expression, but likely approximates a grimace.

The horse-groom is waiting at the gate to the Vasilias property when Damen arrives, a high-hedged plot of land neighboured by other such high-hedged plots of land in a heritage district of the city. In Damen’s youth, he did not think of the house as particularly large or significantly appointed—it was so of a piece, the other houses on the street with just as many rooms and just as much imported furniture. It was only when he became a soldier, only when he returned from the Veretian border and started to frequent the dockside boxing hall, that he came to realise the exact measure of his father’s money. Damen’s money, ultimately. And perhaps sooner than he would want it.

He is likely frowning as he hands the reigns off to the groom, which is perhaps why the boy gives him a startled, pale look before dropping his gaze altogether and performing an admirable attempt to melt into the horse’s shadow.

“Thank you,” Damen tries, an endeavour to smooth it over, but it comes out entirely too gruff. He hesitates a moment, before straightening and striding toward the house. He does not look back. He does, however, slow at the sight of a figure emerging from the front door, closing it delicately behind herself with a clear effort to ensure the action is silent.

“My Lady,” Damen calls to her, proper thought abandoned, because surely this will lift his mood. Surely this will be a bolstering—a shore against whatever tempest is hammering away at his rationality and habitual composure. Lady Jokaste turns, and even before Damen broaches the distance between them, he can see her rosy smile.

“I thought that I had missed you,” she says once they meet, her stood on the top step of the porch and him on the cobbles, bringing them to almost the same height. She is hatless, an oversight for visiting, but Damen has no cause to complain: her gloriously yellow hair, pinned and curled with volume and wave as it is, catches the morning light and turns her golden. She is also not made up, her complexion un-powdered and unaltered, which is a further pleasure to see. He notices something which he has not before: a pretty constellation of barely-brown freckles, on her cheekbone under her right eye.

“You would have, if I had followed my habit. Yet the stars have seemed to align in our favour; I cut my ride short, and find you here to greet me.” Her gaze drops for a moment, causing her blonde eyelashes—abundant and rendered uncommonly colourless in the sun—to flutter. Damen finds that his smile is now more genuine. The day has improved already.

“I am aware of the impropriety, but your brother permitted me to wait in the drawing room. I had hoped that—No matter. I unfortunately cannot linger. I have an appointment, and Madame Broussard does not like to be kept waiting.”

“I wonder that a Veretian dressmaker has the audacity to dictate the schedules of Akielon women, no matter how fine her tailoring. I am sure she will not make you suffer consequence for a few minutes’ delay. And besides,” he adds with warmth, sweeping what is perhaps an overly-obvious gaze down her person, “you appear to be already well-dressed for a ball.” Indeed, the gown she wears is of a gleaming cream silk, barely shades lighter than the skin of her exposed décolletage. The hollow of her throat provides a cradle for a resplendent ruby, suspended from a velvet ribbon tied neatly around her slender neck. Her gloves, of the same burnished ivory as her dress, are clenched in her fist; her caplet, draped over her forearm almost as though she had picked it up as an afterthought, in a rush. If he had seen her in this dress across a ballroom, Damen would be unable to stop himself from bypassing proper introduction and hurtling straight to asking for the dance.

The imagined scenario is not, in effect, all too different from the way that they met—a meeting the direct cause of the heavy diamond now nestled on her left ring finger, a promise made and intention declared with the most fashionable stone available. When he had presented it to her, her expression made it seem as though he could have mined the diamond from her own sparkling eyes.

“I have not yet been home,” she tells him smoothly, free of self-consciousness where another lady may be victim to it. This is something that Damen liked of her instantly: her honesty. She has always been forward with her thoughts, and remains exactly as she seems. “Or I did stop in, at an early hour, but did not stay long enough to dress for the day. I was given a message by my housekeeper, appraising me of something which an acquaintance of mine discovered—there was barely sunlight, but I came to you directly, only to find that you had already left for your ride. But—perhaps it is not so urgent as I fear. I am going to be late,” she adds, descending the steps and making to sweep past him. Unthinkingly, he catches her by the upper arm. It does stop her, but it also puts a hardness into her eyes that he has not seen before. As gently as he can manage, he releases her, and puts a wide step between them.

“I apologise, unreservedly. That was a liberty taken and not asked for. But Jokaste, please—can you not simply tell me now? Or I shall take you in the carriage, and you can tell me on the journey?”

“Do not trouble your groom. It is barely a block away.” She has not gone cold, but uncompromising; the solidity of marble, only brought to softness by the application of a skilled sculptor’s hand. Damen’s hand, it seems, lacks the artistry in this moment. “You have been issued an invitation. I daresay it is for the reception that I will also be attending tomorrow night. We will discuss the matter then.”

“Then—if it is truly not urgent. And as long as you are well. I look forward to seeing your new gown, tomorrow night.” Into the sentiment, he injects all the warmth and apology available to him. It does little to soothe the injury, clearly, as she looks to him with a pronounced blankness.

It is a fortunate thing, that she is so forthcoming with her speech; he often finds her expressions inscrutable.

“Captain Vasilias,” she replies by way of farewell, and this time he does not move to stop her. Damen does not move at all, except to watch her, until she has exited through the visitor’s door to the side of the main gate and disappeared from sight.

It is not as though he has not touched her before. They have danced, obviously, and he was blessed to hold her hand while they courted. Since the arrangement has been made, even, she has visited his bed on a number of occasions (always with the admonishments of “No other will hear of this,” and “This will not occur again”). The memories of those secretly-bestowed nights filled his absent thoughts, until about a month ago.

The gift of her body, only ever given with the acknowledgement that it is promised to Damen anyway, and so the long engagement is no reason to behave as though they are still courting. He knows that the endurance of their betrothed state has been grating on her, the situation of suspension which he keeps her in being a cause of much frustration. He had always made it clear, though, that he could not dedicate himself to her when the company was in flux. She does not deserve his instability, nor only a careless portion of his attentions.

With his father’s current condition, perhaps she will not have to wait much longer.

Part II of Chapter I of A Storm That Took Everything will be posted on day 2 of the Damen Love Fest 🖤🖤🖤

#damenlovefest2023 #captive prince #damianos of akielos #captive prince fic #lamen fic #my writing #a storm that took everything fic

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sleeplesssmoll · 5 months

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Thank you for replying so fast! It’s really interesting that Vertin really did make such a gamble. Speaking of which, what is with the two moons? Is that the Storm Syndrome of the era? How is it related to the pop art thing we see happen?

Full disclosure before this: I adore Vernetto and I’m very much writing from the perspective of Vernetto Real, haha. So: I feel like Vertin and Sonetto’s relationship changes quite a bit throughout the story. In chapter 3, Vertin is the one who pursues Sonetto, but the dynamic is reversed (ha) later on. I often feel like Vertin has trouble identifying her own emotions regarding other people, and it makes me wonder if maybe she had a crush on Sonetto without realizing it when they were kids, giving her all sorts of things in an attempt to bond with her. It didn’t really work because Sonetto was so scared of anything from the outside, despite her natural curiosity. Then the breakaway happened, there was no chance for things to progress, and Vertin “moved on”.

I feel like it breaks Vertin’s heart to see Sonetto shut down her natural curiosity and interest in the outside world due to the Foundation’s indoctrination, but at the same time, Vertin doesn’t want to force her to change her views. Instead I think she is incredibly supportive and proud of Sonetto whenever she makes strides in the direction of independence. And of course she’s always happy to enable Sonetto when she wants to try things (I really cannot imagine a world where Vertin turned down Sonetto’s cheek kissing practice or bridge invitation!).

Also, do we know if the prologue is the first time Vertin and Sonetto have met each other since the breakaway, or if they’ve seen each other in between? Things like Sonetto’s birthday letter would maybe imply that it’s not the first time, right?

I want to know the last bit as much as you 😂 I'm assuming they stayed in touch but there isn't much to go off of. I really want to know what happened between the break away event and the intro.

Sonetto, how did you get from "damn it Vertin" to this puppy? Also, despite Sonetto scolding Vertin, she will still accept the gifts and never outright ignores her. If Vertin calls, she'll answer and I think that says something about her too.

Vertin once mentioned to Madam Z she knew she could depend on her because on that night long ago, she saw that madam z was not part of Constantine's game by the look in her eyes. She also doesn't force people to make choices they really don't want. For example, she gives Regulus options in the Suitcase after everything as proof of this. Like if Regulus wanted, she could have joined the Foundation which would make sense considering the whole experiment thing but they really are alike so that didn't happen. She stayed.

Going off of this, I think Vertin has high emotional intelligence but doesn't necessarily know the correct action to take. Especially since they were kids back then. Maybe she saw that curious spark Sonetto displays now and wanted to fuel it, hoping to bond over shared interests? Her perception is highlighted throughout the story. Perhaps she knew Sonetto doesn't actually hate her despite her frustrations? Gremlin energy. You love and you hate them.

As for the Storm Syndrome, yes I think the moons were a side effect of the Storm but I couldn't tell you exactly what it represented 🤔

From a shipping perspective, I l'm happy with any content with Vertin in it lol. As for the analysis of shipping dynamics, I like comparing opposite dynamics since it helps me refine the point I'm trying to make. On this case, it'd be Schneider.

While seeing Schneider's effect on Vertin is straightforward, Sonetto's true influence stood out to me when I backtracked.

From the moment they met, Schneider is described with a sort of romantic or pretty language. From her face to her scent, she's directly described in a delicate but deadly light. It really feels like she made a shift in Vertin's world in the short time they knew each other.

The context she thinks about Sonetto isn't highlighted with the same romanticism she applies to Schneieder, but she constantly appears in Vertin's thoughts. In Sonetto's case it's the small things that Vertin's always noticed but never forgets. Sonetto lives in her head rent free from her dreams (artificial somnambulism) to memories from their days as children.

From all the way back in the intro, Vertin makes references to their school days when she meets Sonetto. Like the way Sonetto looks up at the sky and takes a deep breath before combat or the determined expression is the same kind she makes before an exam. While Schneider made a huge impact in a moment, Sonetto's presence quietly persisted in her mind for a long time.

In simpler terms:

Schneider was the one who shook her world.

Sonetto is her Roman Empire.

I might have more dynamics to work with in the future and this is subject to change as the character develop but I hope this is useful for your story! Good luck! 👍

#anon ask #vertin #sonetto #schneider #reverse1999

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punkass-diogenes · 6 months

Text

Zionism isn't what people think it is (it's worse)

Note: this was not written by me. It was taken from here.

I often get the impression that most people discussing the Israel-Palestine issue have done very little research into the history of Zionism, the history of Palestine, the history of the Jewish Diaspora, or the history of the State called Israel (henceforth called Medinat Israel). It can lead to very frustrating discussions where nobody seems to understand why the other side won't agree with them or change their mind or even empathize with the other position in the slightest.

You often encounter liberal American Jews who say things like "I am a Zionist, but I oppose the occupation, and the Likud government, and believe in separation of religion and State, and support equal rights for Palestinians, and even right of return of Palestinians... but I'm a strong Zionist like I really believe in Zionism" and it begs the question "what do you think Zionism means then?" Likewise, you sometimes encounter anti-zionists, like myself, who seem to have no idea why so many Jewish people moved to Palestine, or why these holocaust survivors keep electing fascists, and then we'll say ignorant things like "they should all move back to Europe" which basically immediately tells whoever is listening that you have no idea what you're talking about.

For a full-disclosure, I'm an anti-zionist, I do not believe in Zionism. I think Zionism is the golden calf of our day and has turned many Jews away from Judaism and towards a fascist nationalist worship of the State. I think Medinat Israel is an awful racist apartheid state and needs to be abolished and replaced with a secular bi-national state with equal rights for all and a right of return for Palestinians in diaspora, and that the funds used for Aaliyah programs should be diverted to helping any Palestinians who return to re-settle in the new state, ideally on their original lands which had been taken from them only a generation or two ago. I also believe in freedom of movement, that is unethical to displace someone from the place where they were born, and that there should be no enforced demographic proportions or attempts to affect who has the majority at any give time. I even think it's maybe possible for a one-state solution to still provide a safe refuge for Jews fleeing persecution in very hostile countries without privileging Jews over Palestinians; though right now I think it honestly makes more sense for us to encourage them to settle in like, New Jersey, which is honestly objectively safer for Jewish refugees than an active war zone like Palestine.

And that last part might confuse some people. How can you be an anti-zionist and also believe that Palestine can be a safe refuge for Jewish refugees? and that would be because most people don't understand what Zionism means.

Terminology

Here's some terminology:

B'nei/Beney Yisrael: This means "The Sons of Israel" and has referred to the Jewish people for thousands of years. In many languages, this is just what you call Jews. Yisrael/Israel, on its own, for thousands of years, just meant "All the Jewish People." In Jewish liturgy, any time "Yisrael" shows up it's not referring to the Land of Israel and certainly not the State of Israel, it just means "The People called Yisrael."

Bene Yisrael: This refers specifically to the Jewish diaspora in India and Pakistan, the many Jews who, upon being expelled from Judea by the Romans, headed east and settled in the Indian subcontinent. After the partition of India and the movement of Pakistan and India towards being states defined by being Muslim or Hindu, most Bene Yisraeli Jews feared persecution and moved to Medinat Israel, the US, or other British Commonwealth countries.

Benai Yisrael: This spelling generally refers to Samaritans, who are a different ethnoreligious group in the Levant region, mostly Ha'aretz Yisrael, who were never expelled and do not consider themselves Jewish though they do claim to also be descendants of the ancient Israelites, just a different tribe than the ones who became the Jews.

Bnei Isro'il: This refers specifically to the Jewish diaspora in a part Central Asia that is now within Uzbekistan, they are a subset of Mizrahi Jews called the Bukharan Jews. After the dissolution of the Soviet Union shit got really difficult for them and most of them moved to Medinat Israel or to the United States.

Beta Israel: This refers specifically to the Jewish diaspora in Ethiopia, who have always faced a lot of racism from other Jews and were more separate from the other diaspora groups because of it, thus their version of Judaism is more different than Ashkenazi or Sephardic Judaism (though it's still very much valid Judaism!!). This racism is, of course, because Beta Israeli Jews are Black. Ethiopia was kind of a rough place to live what with WWII and the famine and the wars, so Beta Israel actually was really interested in leaving Ethiopia more-so than most other diaspora groups. The Ethiopian government, however, for a long time, prohibited Jews from emigrating from Ethiopia. During the Ethiopian Civil War in the late 20th century, things got worse, with the Ethiopian government becoming increasingly hostile to the Jewish population in retaliation for horrible human rights abuses enacted by Medinat Israel, even though the Jews in Ethiopia had nothing to do with it what since they were living in Ethiopia and not allowed to leave the country by the same government attacking them. In response, Medinat Israel evacuated nearly the entire Beta Israel community to Palestine through an elaborate MOSSAD operation; and since then, some have moved to the United States. Once in Medinat Israel, they have faced lots of racism including coerced sterilization by the government; with many Beta Israeli women saying that they were told by immigration officials they would not be allowed to immigrate unless they agreed to being injected with a long-term contraceptive drug.

Ha'aretz Yisrael: This refers specifically to The Land of Israel, regardless of who is living there now or what the current government is. It's where the Kingdom of Israel from the TaNaKh supposedly was though the exact borders are under dispute. It's also where we all originated, albeit over 1800 years ago (and you can tell by looking at us that all of us are of mixed heritage now, no matter what anyone claims). This land traded hands between various empires constantly who all liked to change the name, so Jews just refer to it as Ha'aretz Yisrael rather than trying to keep up with what we're calling it these days according to whoever most recently conquered it. Traditionally, there is a prophecy that someday in the distant future, when there is no more war or hunger, a messiah will come who will lead all the Jews in diaspora back to Ha'aretz Yisrael and then all the dead will come back to life and everyone will be immortal and it's basically the closest thing Judaism has to an afterlife; and most Jews don't even believe this anymore. Some Jews believe that we explicitly should not preempt this and should avoid living in Ha'aretz Yisrael before the messiah comes.

Medinat Yisrael: This means "The State of Israel" and refers specifically to the government, the State, that has been established in Palestine, which named itself "Israel." It didn't ask us all if we wanted them to use the name that traditionally referred to the entire ethnic group as the name of their government but that's what they decided to do and now we're stuck with it. More abstractly, it can refer to the idea of "A Jewish State" of a non-specific location, it just so happens that the one that exists is also in Palestine.

Israelis: People who have been born in Medinat Israel, or have become Israeli Citizens through immigration, regardless of if they are Jewish or not. This includes Israeli Arabs and Israeli Palestinians.

Israelites: The ancient people of the Kingdom of Israel as featured in the TaNaKh who Jews, Samaritans, the Banu Israil Muslim community in Uttar Pradesh, the Knanaya Christians in Kerala, the Lemba people in Zimbabwe and South Africa, some Pashtuns, some British Nationalists, some French Nationalists, some Scandinavian Nationalists, some Kurds, some Japanese Nationalists, the Black Hebrew Israelites in the United States, and the Mormons in the United States all claim ancestry from. Genetic testing has shown evidence that Jews and Samaritans (discounting recent converts) probably do actually share a common ancestor that lived where the Kingdom of Israel was around that time but like, that's so long ago we really can't say anything for certain.

Sabra (pl. Sabrim): Jewish people who have been born in Medinat Israel; which is what a lot of people mean to refer to when they say Israeli.

Aliyah: When a Jewish person immigrates to Medinat Israel, they call it "making aliyah." Someone who has made aliyah becomes an Israeli but not a Sabra.

Anyway, that's all super easy to remember right? So here's the misconception: Many people believe that Zionism is the belief that B'nei Yisrael should live in Ha'aretz Yisrael but actually Zionism is the belief that B'nei Yisrael should live in Medinat Yisrael, which happens to be located in Ha'artez Yisrael but it didn't necessarily have to be. Zionists, in turn, have helped Bene Israel, Bnei Is'roil, and Beta Israel emigrate to Medinat Yisrael (among others in B'nei Yisrael). Benai Yisrael was already in Ha'aretz Yisrael before the Zionists established Medinat Yisrael in Ha'aretz Yisrael. Simple, easy to remember.

Could You Please Say That Again in English

There is a misconception that Zionism is the belief that Jews from across the diaspora should all live together in the Land of Israel, AKA where Palestine is now. They might even think it's just the belief that the country called Israel should be allowed to exist at all, and that the Jews who live there should be allowed to continue living there. But that is not what Zionism is.

Zionism is the belief that Jews should live in a Jewish State, which is to say, a nation-state that is majority Jewish and controlled by Jews and only or primarily Jews1. It is explicitly and openly a colonialist venture. The Zionist movement originally didn't even care if the proposed Jewish State was in Palestine, although it was definitely always their top choice.

Theodor Herzl was the father of modern Zionism as we know it. In his manifesto, Der Judenstaat, Herzl talks about how establishing a Jewish state would be this magnificent replication of European colonialism and would elevate the Jewish people to the level of the Western Civilizations. He proposed that the Jewish state be established in.... Argentina! Well, he also proposed Palestine, but he thought Argentina might be more practical.

In fact, here's all the locations that Zionists proposed might be good places for The Jewish State to be established:

Grand Island, Erie county, New York

Uganda

Palestine

Argentina

Siberia

Crimea

Cyprus

Kenya

Manchuria

Madagascar

British Guiana

Ohio

Ethiopia

Tasmania

The Polish provinces that had previously been annexed by Russia

Jordan ("Eh, close enough to Palestine?")

Saudi Arabia

The Dominican Republic

Greece

Albania

Australia

Eastern Prussia/AKA what is now that weird exclave of Russia.

Kiryas Joel, New York

Quebec

Alaska

Vietnam, which was actually offered to David Ben-Gurion by Ho Chi Minh himself, which supposedly David Ben-Gurion dismissed by just saying "for obvious reasons, this was unacceptable."

G... Germany... Just... right in Germany... which I'm sure all the Jews would feel very safe doing.

There are many flavors of Zionism, certainly. Liberal Zionists believe in having a liberal democratic capitalism state. Religious Zionists who basically believe David Ben-Gurion was the aforementioned messiah. Labor Zionists who believe that the Judenstaadt should have socialist collective farming or something. The current flavor of Zionism that dominates Israeli politics and is the ideology of the ruling Likud party is Revisionist Zionism which believes first and foremost in having a strong military to defend the Jewish State, that "the ability to shoot" is the most important thing, and that the Jewish majority in the Jewish state must be maintained through violence in order to keep Jews safe. They are also territorial expansionists and believe that Medinat Israel and Ha'Aretz Yisrael should map 1:1 to the fullest extent, which is to say, they believe in annexing Palestine, and chunks of other neighboring countries as well. Likud also came into power by assassinating a sitting prime minister, which is cool. They'll claim that they're not responsible but the assassin was a member of the Likud party, so, like, take that as you will.

Let me be clear, all flavors of Zionism are colonialist ideologies, but the Revisionist Zionists are downright fascists. The Irgun, the armed militia that the Likud party grew out of, openly praised Adolf Hitler and said that they would only fight the Nazis because they are antisemitic and a threat to Jewish people, not because they disagreed with anything else that the Nazis were doing. They said that the anti-semitism of Nazism was the "shell" that they would discard, but they would keep the "Anti-Marxist Kernel" which they admired in Nazism. Here is a citation for this because I know many people might struggle to believe this, but it's in like the first thirty pages of this book.

I do not believe that all the Jews currently living in Medinat Israel should be deported, especially not the sabrim or the refugees whose entire communities moved there looking for a place where they wouldn't be persecuted. I think it's always wrong to displace people from where they were born, whether they be Jewish or Palestinian, and that it's important for people to accept refugees and immigrants. But I don't believe in Zionism, because I do not believe in a Jewish State. I do not believe in maintaining a Jewish majority. I do not believe in ethno-states or theocracy or ethnotheocracy. I do not believe Jews are entitled to owning all or any of Ha'aretz Yisrael and I do not believe Jews should be aspiring to replicate Western Colonialism. In fact, I believe that colonizing and displacing the Palestinian people from their land is morally wrong and contrary to the ethics of Judaism. Thus, I am anti-zionist.

Zionism is not believing it's OK for Jews to live in the State of Israel; or that it would be cool for Jews to live together in our ancestral homeland; it's believing that Jews should control a State of Israel as a privileged class with a unnaturally maintained majority. Zionists believe Jews will never be safe unless we control the government to exclusions of everyone else. I disagree. I think diversity is good and it's possible to live in harmony with other peoples. The Zionists disagree with me. I think they're racists and, these days? mostly fascists.

OK so, wait, how the hell do so many Jews believe in Zionism then? Most Jews are pretty anti-fascist given the whole holocaust thing, right?

Here's the thing that I think a lot of people miss. Most Jews living in Medinat Israel didn't really have a choice, and they have nowhere to go back to either. Before WWII, Zionism was not very popular. You can find so many historical documents of Jews making fun of Zionists as "wanting us to waste a lot of money and go die in the desert." Jews across the diaspora weren't exactly doing stellar but for most of them, they were living in society and the way the Zionist framed things (whether or not it was true) was that settling Ha'Aretz Yisrael was gonna be this whole colonial venture of building up new cities from scratch and working the land and farming and being survivalists and shit. When everything is already so precarious, why risk what you do have for a hypothetical thing that sounds exhausting and risky?

But in the mid-20th century, well, their hands were forced. The holocaust happened, and entire communities were wiped out. The Lithuanian village my great grandmother's family was from? After they left, the holocaust killed 100% of the Jews living there, and then the Soviet Union displaced all the Lithuanians, demolished all of the buildings, and just built an entirely new settlement with new people living there. In fact, they did this to the entire Marijampole metropolitan region. The Marijampole region as my great grandparents knew it is just gone. Lithuania once had some of the most Jews in the entire world, with some parts like Majiampole being super-majority Jewish. Of course the Jews in Marijampole didn't find Zionism particularly appealing, they already had their majority Jewish city, why build another one? In the year 2000, there were only 3600 Jews left in all of Lithuania. The city of Minsk in Belarus? It was once 55% Jewish, and no, Zionism wasn't very popular. The Nazis killed 90% of the Jews living in Minsk. The rest of the Jews all emigrated to Medinat Israel or the United States. Minsk is now less than 1% Jewish. Minsk is where my grandmother's parents had been born, but the Minsk they knew is gone entirely. After the Nazis killed all the Jews, and WWII destroyed most of the city, the Soviet Union basically just built an entirely new city and settled new people there who weren't Jewish.

And what were the Zionists doing at this time? They were evacuating refugees. When the Nazis are on your trail, you don't really ask where you're going. The Zionists said "Hey, looks like living in Europe isn't going so well for you, wanna come settle Palestine with us?" and the Jews of Europe said "SURE, FINE, GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF HERE, ASAP." Remember, the argument of the Zionists was "Jews will never be safe if they don't control the State" and now were extending their hand presenting themselves as the only way to escape the holocaust. Remember, also, that a lot of countries were refusing to take holocaust refugees, or setting very limited caps on how many they would take. The Zionists said "come here, all of you, no matter what."

A lot of the state-building the Zionists were doing was before the holocaust, and they were certainly building popularity the further they got along, but the holocaust was when their huge population boom happened, it was when they hit critical mass, it was when the majority of Jews came to sympathize with the Zionist project. The holocaust became the perfect example for the Zionists to use to argue that the Judenstaadt is necessary. This was a rhetorical trick. If you read Der Judenstaadt this was never the original concern of Herzl. Herzl believed that the Jewish State should be a technocracy run by corporations using Jewish immigrants as cheap loyal workers to turn a profit. But, hey, Herzl didn't foresee WWII.

Now, all that? That's just the Ashkenazi Jews and some Sephardic Jews. But let's talk about the Mizrahi Jews. The Mizrahim are the Jews who didn't travel too far from Jerusalem after the Romans expelled us. They lived in the Middle East, Central Asia, the Arabian Peninsula, Iran, Egypt, even Palestine (it's not like the Romans were still keeping us out forever.) Under most Muslim governments, Mizrahim were given the status "people of the book" and considered a sort of protected second-class citizen. While not as privileged as Muslim citizens, they were still able to attain a pretty comfortable and stable middle-class life. Again, why would Zionism appeal to you? Sure, you weren't top of the food chain, but life was fine enough.

But when Medinat Israel declared independence and started pushing out all the Palestinians, all the neighboring Muslim nations were outraged (and rightfully so!) Unfortunately, they retaliated against the Mizrahim who lived within their borders, who had nothing to do with Medinat Israel but were blamed for it anyway. Many Jews were downright expelled from these countries, or were forced to move to Medinat Israel through negotiated "population exchanges" where Medinat Israel deported thousands of Palestinians to neighboring countries who in turn deported an equal number of Jews to Medinat Israel. This is a violation of the United Nations Declaration of Human Rights.

This same story is repeated throughout the world. Once the State of Israel was established, people could finally tell the Jews to "go back where you came from." Entire communities emigrated, whether to flee existing persecution, new persecution that is arguably the fault of the Zionists, or were just absolutely terrified of being next, after seeing what was happening in the rest of the world.

If you tell most Israeli Jews to "go back where they came from" the question they'll ask back is "and where exactly is that? Is that not here? Because those other people told me to go back where I came from and sent me here." They'll say "you're insane, why would I do that, did you see what happened to us there?" They'll say "The place I'm from doesn't exist anymore. It was destroyed. Everybody left. It's gone." They'll maybe even say "I'd love to, but I'm not allowed to."

Here's another way to think of it: The Israeli Jews are like a child who was beaten growing up and grows up to be violent and angry and to believe that being strong and intimidating is the only way to protect themselves. They are fiercely loyal to Medinat Israel because it took them in when they lost everything. They believe the fascist Likud narrative because to many of them, it is their own lived experience. They thought they would be safe, then they faced violence, and then they were forced to flee. Medinat Israel was the only guaranteed safe place to go. Perhaps you could try to emigrate to Canada or the United States but passage wasn't guaranteed and that would still be colonizing someone else's land. Medinat Israel guaranteed they would be brought in and even given help to settle. It was a deal they couldn't refuse. And besides, haven't the Jews always lived on someone else's land? Weren't they always unwanted wherever we went? What was different this time in that sense? How were Palestinians different from Germans or Ethiopians or Moroccans? The Zionists would say: "The difference is this time we are stronger than they are. This time we will be in charge."

And it is sad. It is horrible. It is tragic. It is miserable that so many people who have been the persecuted minority themselves would turn to becoming the oppressor. That victims of genocide and displacement would turn to genocide and displacement as what they believe is the way to protect themselves. And they are wrong, too. This is not necessary. The violence is not necessary and is evil. Palestinians and Jews have so much in common culturally, spiritually, even genetically. We could have lived together in peace and become the best of friends. If only the Zionists had been willing to live together in peace. But peace is not possible within their ideology. The Zionist ideology is inherently one of state violence. There is no way for one ethnic or religious group to control a state without persecuting a minority, and forcing them to remain a minority through violence. Zionism is the belief that Jews cannot be safe unless Jews have a monopoly on violence within a given region.

And what of the Jews in diaspora who support Zionism? The Americans and Canadians and Argentinians and Brits who do not wish to move to Medinat Israel but support it in everything it does uncritically? The younger Jews, the fourth or fifth generation immigrants, we don't have much attachment to whatever shtetl or city our families came from, it's easier for us to see the horrors and evils of Zionism for what it is. But for our grandparents and great grandparents, they remembered those shtetls and cities, they had family and relatives there, and they listened on the radio as all of those people died, as their old world was destroyed completely. Nobody wanted to talk about Marijampole or Minsk to me. They are gone. It's best not to ruminate on them. Jews have been displaced every generation with no attachment to where we were, I was told, so why does it matter.

To these Jews, Medinat Israel represents having one place in the entire world where the Jews are safe. One place that will always accept them as refugees if America or Canada or Argentina doesn't work out.

It is an unfortunate and tragic reality that most people will put their own safety and needs over the safety and needs of others when they feel that they are under threat. The place of empathetic breakdown is that at some point you say to the true Zionist "Don't you see that what you're doing to the Palestinians is wrong?" and the true Zionist says "Yes, it is wrong, and it is also necessary for us to survive and that is more important."

And they are wrong. Had the Jews fleeing to Palestine just treated the Palestinians with respect and dignity, as equals who deserved this land, as the owners of this land who had a right to it, then Jews would actually have been safer. Solidarity is safer than animosity. Palestine was a former British colony achieving independence for the first time in centuries. The Jews and Palestinians could have worked together to rebuild a new country based on mutual respect and dignity and solidarity.

But, alas, that is not their mentality. Their mentality is one of a beaten child. And so seventy years pass and you ask the American Jew living in the suburbs of New York "do you support the State of Israel? Are you a Zionist?" and they say "Uhh... I guess I'm a Zionist. I don't really know the history. But I want the Jews there to be safe, that's important to me. They shouldn't have to leave."

Zionism isn't just colonialism, it's worse, it's millions of historically persecuted people turning to fascism because of generational trauma. It demonstrates that just because someone is from persecuted minority, doesn't meant that violence and power can't corrupt them just the same.

Because the Zionists have convinced us that those are the only options, that co-existing is impossible, that friendship and solidarity across differences is impossible. Zionists created a narrative that if the Jews do not hold absolute power, then they'll have to leave. But it's not true. They are wrong. Peace is possible, if we can just believe in it, if we can loosen our grip on power, if we can be willing to pay reparations. I truly believe that that is possible.

In-turn, anti-zionism is not the belief that Jews shouldn't live in the Land of Israel. It's the belief that Jewish people shouldn't be trying to establish an ethno-state or replicate colonialism.

#zionism #israel #palestine #jewish

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scarlet--wiccan · 1 year

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Hello! I was wondering, what would you classify as the outfits defining the different eras of Wanda? Like her first, classic, Wada, and Dauterman outfits.

Well, I think you've kinda answered your own question. Wanda's had lots of costumes, but her most iconic ones can usually be attributed a specific artist's work on a specific book. She didn't really start changing up her look until the 90s, but I would say that her most iconic outfits, outside of the classic one, really are the Pérez dancer costume from Avengers (1998), and Kevin Wada's design from Scarlet Witch (2016). A lot of her other looks are more short lived, or just not well-remembered. The new one's made a big splash, but it's too soon to say what kind of staying power it'll have.

Some of those short-lived looks are actually my favorites, though, so I want to do a brief history of Wanda's costumes. This is only going to be from the main Earth-616 continuity, and, full disclosure, I'm cribbing most of these images from uncannyxmen.net's costume gallery.

The classic Scarlet Witch costume has had several variations over the years. She consistently wears some version of this outfit from the 60s through to the 90s, but there were often changes to the style and cut of her garments. She wore a wimple-like headpiece in her early appearances, and traded it in for the now-iconic M-shaped diadem in Avengers #36, published 1966. She also went through a few maternity versions of her costume during her pregnancy in Vision & The Scarlet Witch (1985).

Wanda's first major costume changes were actually the result of possession or mental manipulation-- when possessed by Chthon, Wanda takes on a ghastly appearance and her clothing transforms into a dark red bodysuit with a tattered cape, sans headpiece. [Avengers #186] Later, while under Immortus's influence, Wanda cuts her hair short, ditches the headpiece again, and dons a red-and-black costume with a dramatic purple cape. [Avengers West Coast #55]

Wanda began changing her look more frequently in the 90s. During the late run of Avengers West Coast through Force Works, she wore a red dress over a black one-piece, with a necklace, gloves, and boots-- no headpiece. This is the first real costume change that she made of her own volition. She also had a brief-lived costume which first appeared in The Crossing, that drew more inspiration from the magical characters in Doctor Strange.*

The Pérez design first appeared in the opening storyline of Avengers (1998). In an alternate reality conjured by Morgan le Fay, Wanda and Pietro both appear as sterotypical "gypsies." Wanda later adapted her her outfit from this world in a contemporary costume. This was intended as an earnest representation of Wanda's cultural identity, but it fell quite short of the mark. Alan Davis later designed a more conventional superhero suit combining many of the same elements, without being an ethnic costume.*

In the early 2000s, Wanda debuted a set of red body armor with that combined fantasy aesthetics with a superhero silhouette*. This what she's wearing during Disassembled, but it's not well-remembered, perhaps because of the understated color palette. Wanda returned in Children's Crusade wearing a slightly updated version of the classic costume, with a halterless one-piece and cowl-neck cloak. I think this is the version most people refer to when they draw her classic suit, so to that end, it might be the most iconic.

Wanda had another rapid succession of costume changes in the 2010s, starting with the knee-length red dress with built-in gloves she debuted in Uncanny Avengers (2013).* In the Uncanny Avengers 2015 miniseries, she and Pietro both donned new, but very short lived, futuristic costumes for a brief adventure into outer space.

Then, in late 2015, Wanda received her first solo title in two decades, and it came with full aesthetic overhaul. Kevin Wada designed a collection of looks inspired by witch-house and dark romance fashion trends. This was eventually streamlined into a cohesive superhero suit for other ongoing comics, with an ornate red bodice and jeweled diadem.

In 2022, Russell Dauterman designed Wanda's look for the second annual Hellfire Gala event, taking heavy inspiration from the silhouette of her Crossing costume and the darker, more ornate aesthetic of Wada's design. A slightly simplified version of this look became Wanda's main costume in Scarlet Witch (2023) Most notably, this design incorporates the same magical galaxy effect from her son Wiccan's costume into Wanda's skirt and hair, signifying her mastery of chaos magic. Whether or not this costume lasts, I believe that the dark, bejewelled aesthetic and galaxy effect will continue to define Wanda and Billy's looks for years to come.

*these are my personal underrated faves

#wanda maximoff #scarlet witch #robintext #scarlet witch costume

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punisheddonjuan · 1 month

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Pearson Vue GED Testing Service, the company behind the test, is ending service in Canada after this month. "It's ludicrous," Feliciant said about the program ending and the tight deadline. When the end of the program was announced last year, provinces were left to find their own solutions. In the meantime, people who miss the deadline to schedule a test this year won't get another chance — and without any alternative right now in some provinces, such as Ontario, adults wanting to get the equivalent to a high school diploma will face barriers. "We were completely blindsided by that, as were our students … this is just another roadblock for them," said Steven Lobodici, a professor and assessor at Mohawk College, adding he first learned of the change in August 2023. [...] Alternative to GED sorely needed: instructors Jamieson said she was "so sad" to hear the GED is ending. "I know there's so many people who want an education and are striving to do better." Lobodici said there's currently "no adequate replacement" for the GED. He mentioned the Canadian Adult Education Credential (CAEC), which is still in development in Alberta. He also noted there's an Academic and Career Entrance (ACE) certificate, but it isn't widely recognized across the country.

This is ridiculous. Full disclosure, I decided to pursue a GED instead of finishing high school. Being chronically ill as an adolescent meant I missed a huge amount of school. Some years I totaled over 90 recorded absences (roughly half of the total school days in a year). I couldn't stay in a normal high school, so I bounced around a few different alternative schools over the next few years but never stayed in one place for longer than two years because I simply wasn't there often enough. I even tried online correspondence high school for a year in between two of those alternative programs and that was alright, but by the time I was eighteen I had maybe seven or eight high school credits total, well short of the thirty needed to graduate.

So when I was nineteen I wrote the GED. I passed with perfect or near perfect scores in almost every subject area (except math, I only managed a 75% there) which isn't too shabby when the only studying I did was scanning through the study guide fifteen minutes before the test. Based on those GED scores and the strength of my audition to the music program on classical guitar I was accepted as a mature student to a university with a very good reputation. One change of major later, I wound up graduating Summa Cum Laude with a B.A. (Hons.). Then after earning my B.A. I applied and was accepted into a graduate program at the top university in the country. We all know what happens next (my health takes a nosedive and I have to drop out of grad school), but that any of this was in any way even possible was thanks to being able to get my GED. Not having anything to replace it with is a real travesty, and it's closing the door on so many people, but especially the poor, disabled, racialized, and marginalized.

#link #article #canadian politics #ged

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solitaireships · 2 months

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Cultural Reconnection

Happy Lunar New Year! To celebrate, I wanted to do a little selfship fic, and I decided with this one to do a modern AU focused on Helena and Chae-Yeong, partially bcs they have the same backgrounds as me with that so I know a little more about Seollal (Korean new year) things from my irl attempts to connect more with my culture

Full disclosure here, like Helena and Chae-Yeong, a lot of what I know about Seollal celebrations are things that I have recently taught myself from doing research online. This may not be a 100% accurate with how things are celebrated, and if it's not, I would appreciate anyone who knows more giving feedback! While it won't change things with this fic, bcs they also are still learning how to celebrate this properly, it'd help me out with my future LNY celebrations

Rating: Gen

Genre: Fluff

Words: 2325 words

Divider by saradika

Helena doesn’t cook very often. It’s not that she’s a bad cook, but with her and Chae-Yeong both hating being in the kitchen with other people, Chae-Yeong tends to be the one to make dinner more often than not. Helena figures that with how much food they’ll need for tonight’s Seollal celebrations, though, she could handle the majority of the cooking.

As she cooks, Helena’s in new hanbok that Chae-Yeong had bought for this. She’s had to be careful with it— the last thing she wants to do is stain the light green and pink fabric making up the layers of her clothes. Her hanbok’s chima is longer than any of the dresses or skirts she usually wears, but she likes the way it moves around her as she walks around the kitchen.

In some ways it feels like she’s not supposed to be wearing this— her grandmother never passed on much information about Korean culture to Helena or her mother beyond the food. But she’s worn hanbok before, and she reminds herself that this is a part of her culture, even if it’s something she grew up disconnected from.

It helps that Chae-Yeong’s in a similar boat to Helena. Both of them are a quarter Korean, both of them didn’t get many cultural things passed down to them, and both of them look white. Helena is used to feeling out of place everywhere she goes, never really feeling like she belongs to any community fully. But with Chae-Yeong, she actually feels like she’s not alone.

Trying to fill the many gaps in her knowledge of Korean culture is more fun with Chae-Yeong, though. That’s another thing that makes Helena feel less alone, less like she’s an imposter and doesn’t really count as Korean. And as Helena finishes up making their rice cake soup hopes that she’s able to make Chae-Yeong feel the same way.

“The soup is done, starlight!” Helena calls.

“Smells good,” Chae-Yeong says, coming into the kitchen with a bottle of sparkling cider in hand. She looks pretty in hanbok— she's dressed in has a bright red skirt and a black jeogori. The silver and pink norigae she’s wearing is a nice touch too with its butterfly charm, standing out from the rest of the outfit.

Helena thinks this look suits her well. Her hanbok even matches with the red and black paint along her prosthetic arm and leg. It seems to match her perfectly, and is a good reminder to Helena of just how pretty her wife is.

“Thanks,” Helena says. “Did you get the rest of the table set up?”

“Mhm.” Chae-Yeong sets the bottle down on the counter, digging through their drawers to find a bottle opener. “We’ll just need to get the last of the hot stuff plated, then everything will be ready.”

Helena turns off the stovetop. “Great. I’m hungry after cooking all day.”

“I’m sure it’ll all taste amazing, yeobo,” Chae-Yeong says. “Do you want me to help plate stuff?”

“If it won’t make you annoyed,” Helena replies, half teasing.

Chae-Yeong rolls her eyes but smiles. “Putting food on plates and cooking are too different things. And it’s not like you’re better.”

“I’m not. But it’s always good to be safe, you can get scary when you feel like it.”

“I don’t get scary.”

“Yeah, you do.” Helena nudges Chae-Yeong’s side as she walks past with a plate of bulgogi. “You look pretty like that, though.”

Chae-Yeong laughs, pausing the process of scooping some rice from their rice cooker to look at Helena. “You’re the only person in the world who could think I’m attractive when I’m mad.”

“Mhm, which is part of why I’m very lucky to have married you,” Helena says.

Chae-Yeong gives her one last little affectionate look before they both go back to plating their food. It’s a lot of work to do, but between the two of them, they’re able to get the job done quickly. Helena switches to bringing plates over to the table, doing what she can to remember where everything is supposed to be placed.

This isn’t like her and Chae-Yeong’s normal dinner arrangements. They have food set up practically covering every inch of it. At one end of the table is a collection of fruits such as Asian pears and apples, with a row of vegetables set up on plates behind it. The third row at the back of the table is where they set up their bowls of rice along with plates full of japchae and bulgogi. There’s a spot near the middle of that back row for the rice cake soup which Chae-Yeong brings in in two large bowls. Behind the table is a folding paper screen, one set up there especially for today. They’ve also set up a candle on either side of the table’s middle row, which Helena lights as she waits for Chae-Yeong.

It’s a lot of food for the two of them to eat. Far more than they’d usually prepare. Helena’s never been a big eater, and just looking at everything laid out in front of them is almost intimidating.

The food isn’t all for them, though. This year they’re trying something new. A part of Seollal is honoring ancestors with charye rites, and this year they’ll be making their first attempt at performing that.

Preparing an offering table was Helena’s idea. She wasn’t sure how Chae-Yeong would feel about it. Chae-Yeong’s relationship with her family was never a good one, and if she didn’t want to be part of the charye rites, Helena would have understood. Only Chae-Yeong’s biological father even seemed remotely worth honoring. Maybe none of Helena’s ancestors are either— her relationship with her maternal grandparents had been tense for years, and she doesn’t know much about any of her relatives beyond her grandparents.

But this is something that’s part of most celebrations of Seollal, and Helena wants to try this at least once. Chae-Yeong agreed to this too, and if nothing else Helena will be glad that she gets to do this with her wife. They had to make some substitutions, though— Helena read that alcohol is usually offered to ancestors, but neither of them drink so instead they opted for a sparkling cider. Incense is also used for charye rites too, but the smell makes Helena feel sick so instead they have a reed diffuser set up on the table by the vegetables.

“Are you ready to do the honors?” Helena asks as Chae-Yeong comes to rest her head on her shoulder.

“If you are,” Chae-Yeong says. “I’m still not sure I’m the best one to be handling this, though. There wasn’t a ton of information about what I’m supposed to be doing online.”

“You’ll do great,” Helena promises, reaching back to give her wife’s hip a quick squeeze.

Chae-Yeong takes a deep breath. It’s rare that she’s ever nervous, but that she’s clearly worried about this is a sign of just how much it matters to her. This is a part of her culture too, a part that neither of them are experienced with. They both want to get this right.

Knowing Helena’s not alone in this is nice.

But it’s also nice seeing the way any nerves fade away as Chae-Yeong begins performing the charye rites. She pulls a piece of prayer written in Korean from one of the pockets built into her skirt, placing it on the table before calling out towards their ancestors in a greeting, welcoming them to the table. She’s always been good at coming off as confident even when she’s new to something, and she looks like she’s done this a thousand times as she pours a cup of sparkling cider as an offering. She places a pair of chopsticks on the plate of bulgogi and leaves a spoon in one of the rice bowls.

Chae-Yeong moves to move the paper screen, unfolding it more so it hides the table from view. Her skirts rustle around her as she makes her way back to Helena.

“Alright, we’ll have to step out for a bit now,” Chae-Yeong says.

Helena nods and lets her wife lead the way out of the dining room and into their living room.

“Are we supposed to just sit in silence while the ancestors eat?” Helena asks as she closes the door behind her.

“I don’t know, I couldn’t find anything about that when I was figuring this out,” Chae-Yeong admits. She takes a seat on the couch. “I’d say we try to be quiet just to be safe. That feels more ceremonial.”

“Okay.”

Helena sits down next to Chae-Yeong. She doesn’t usually like sitting around in silence for a long time— her mind wanders easily, and usually it wanders towards rumination and everything in her life that’s stressing her out. But with Lunar New Year on her mind, she finds her thoughts going to better things for once.

She wonders what her great-grandparents would have thought of her and Chae-Yeong. She never met them, and she never heard stories about them either. There are no puzzle pieces for her to put together, there’s no story she can create from scraps of information. Most of her family tree is a mystery to her even as she honors them.

But Chae-Yeong’s not a mystery at all. Helena knows how to read her unlike anyone else, knows every single one of her little quirks by heart. She’s someone who makes sense, and Helena’s always grateful for their similarities. She makes life so much better for her, and she hopes that regardless of who her great-grandparents or even her great-great-grandparents were, they’d at least be proud of her for finding someone she can be herself around. Maybe they’d be proud of her for reconnecting with her roots, for trying to follow cultural traditions even if it took her a long time to do so.

Family is weird, and it’s complicated, but Helena hopes that there’d be someone in Chae-Yeong’s family that’s happy for her too. And if no one else is, then Helena will be proud of her for them.

The five minutes they’re away from the dining room pass quickly. Chae-Yeong’s leg brushes against Helena, getting past her skirt so that she can feel the plastic of her prosthetic foot brushing against Helena’s lower leg.

Chae-Yeong breaks the silence with a cough. “We’re good to head back in.”

Helena gets up first, waiting a second for Chae-Yeong to get up after her. She stretches as she gets up, making a soft grunting noise.

Nothing’s different as the two of them make it back into the dining room, though Helena feels like it should be. She hopes that this is what they’re supposed to be doing, as Chae-Yeong makes her way to the table again. She moves to put the folding screen back in its original position, revealing the table again. She goes to take the chopsticks from the bulgogi, then the spoon from the rice bowl.

“We’re supposed to bow four times now,” Chae-Yeong says as she rejoins Helena. “It’ll help send the ancestors back to the spirit world.”

Helena hums in response, taking four deep bows along with Chae-Yeong. She hopes that if anyone is watching from the other side, they appreciate the food she and Chae-Yeong prepared for them.

Chae-Yeong strides over to the table again, now taking the written prayer from it and burning it over the candle. The ashes fall down onto the table, and Helena notes that next year they should use a tablecloth.

“Okay,” Chae-Yeong says. “Since we don’t have any ritual things outside of that prayer, I think that’s about it aside from eumbok.”

“Great,” Helena says. Now it’s her turn to step up to the table.

It’s hard to say if that’s what the ceremony was supposed to be like when she has no frame of reference for it. Now that it’s over, she can’t help but worry that they did this wrong. She heard that people usually eat dried fish for Seollal— they didn’t have any of that, maybe that means the food offerings aren’t right. And they might not have done the ceremony itself right either, it was hard trying to find resources online about how to do this. She knows that she’s probably being irrational, and she’s probably holding herself to too high standards, but worry still eats at her.

“I think we might be doing this wrong,” Helena says, frowning down at the table.

“Maybe,” Chae-Yeong replies. Her arms wrap around Helena’s waist as she hugs her from behind. “But I like trying this with you.”

Helena can’t help but smile at that. “Yeah. I like it too.”

It’s not perfect. Helena knows it never will be, no matter how much she wishes she could push everything into place. But she thinks she can be content with imperfection if Chae-Yeong is.

So she leans back to give Chae-Yeong a quick kiss on the cheek.

“How about we go ahead and eat, then?” she suggests.

“Sounds good.”

As they sit down at a corner of the table, Helena looks at all of the food laid out before them. It’s impressive to think about how much they managed to make in one day, and even if things aren’t perfect, Helena thinks now that she’s happy with how things turned out. They’re definitely going to have a lot to eat, though, and she’s sure they’ll be eating leftovers for a long time after this.

Helena takes a slice of Asian pear, offering it to Chae-Yeong. She takes it between her teeth, biting off a piece with an affectionate look at Helena.

She’s lucky to be going into this new year with Chae-Yeong. Everyday with her is a gift. And Helena hopes that when they eat their rice cake soup, symbolizing growing a year older with the lunar new year, this will be one of many more years spent together.

#selfship fic #selfship #safeship #safeship fic #my writing #my posts #lunar new year #💫 Modern AU 🌙#💫 shepherd’s delight #💫#🌙 helena

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autisticlancemcclain · 11 months

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yo Jackie, what's one trope or situation type shit that u wish people would write more fics about. like we all know ur a brown-eyed lance truther, so am I so don't snipe me down babes, but like what else would u wish the fandom would agree on more. like u wish there was more lance and pidge sibling type fics, or more modern fics, or like more dating in secret fics for keith and lance? I'm interested

thank you for asking i have several. full disclosure i am kind of a hater in some of these. did not realize how much i had locked and loaded.

1. doesn’t need to be said but i’m saying it anyway. brown-eyed lance. if i don’t get that tag within a year i am rioting.

2. i LOOOOOOOVE modern aus. they are my bread and butter. i will read a thousand of them. i will WRITE a thousand of them. i love seeing a world built around the essence of these characters, and i love building them more. where would lance be, if he wasn’t in voltron? which of the characters are friends before the whole group finally connects? how do coran and allura fit? where do they work? where do they live? i love it. every decision is a confession.

3. i think everyone needs to have more fun with shiro and allura’s characters. for whatever reason (racism), people like to write them as the villains?? or as boring assholes who are incapable of fun and/or emotions?? anyways it’s the worst. let allura and shiro be stuoid and young and fun 2k23.

4. my favourite thing to write is weird, half analytical backstories/prequels for all the characters, and i love reading them too. what are their families like? what pets if their childhood shaped the way we see them now? who did they learn their habits from? i need to know everything. i have a specific hunk & lance fic i’m thinking about that was never finished, but that changed my entire perception of both of their characters forever. i am so nosy and people in this fandom who create these entire intricate backstories for these characters we already love are so important to me

5. keith’s fanon character in general lowkey pisses me off. i feel like people are OBSESSED with writing him very one dimensional??? like either this kind of mean emo or like tsundere blushing schoolgirl??? anyways it’s weird. keith loves his friends SO much. he cares about everyone everywhere all the time, he’s literally always thinking about what he can do to help people (or he’s being a dorky dumbass lol), he cares so much so often and so deeply. he tries his hardest and puts his all into everything. he loves hugs even though he’s awkward with it. he cries frequently. he wants a mom and at the same time he doesn’t. he loves his brother and his teammates. like??? please please PLEASE i’m begging y’all don’t do keith dirty okay

6. okay you know what’s crazy?? somehow whipped keith and whipped lance ARENT tags. insane to me. like obviously both of them are stupid wicked down bad disgustingly whipped. to me these tags are like. obvious. anyways i wish there were more works under those tags

7. instead of going on a tangent on how each individual character has been done dirty in several ways by fanon, i’m just going to beg everyone in the fandom: please please PLEASE stop making them cruel to each other. okay? they’re young. they’re struggling. they’re constantly under stress literally all the time. they don’t know how to work properly with each other yet. but they LOVE each other, okay?? so much. they would do anything to protect each other. like yes, they mess up, and sometimes they say mean things, and sometimes they just say the WRONG things, and sometimes they’re just awkward with each other!! but they aren’t fucking cruel. not a single member of that team is a cruel person. remember that they want each other to be happy and safe, okay? please. if i read one more fic where the biggest conflict is born by hatred rather than miscommunication or something i am going to lose my mind

8. however there is one specific beef i have with one character’s portrayal in our fandom: HUNK IS NOT A SMOL UWU CINNAMON ROLL. i have no idea why people pretend that he’s this guy who is just constantly smiles and sunshine and who is nice to everyone. let’s not forget that hunk is lowkey a bitch. y’all remember how he acted with nyma and rolo? he is a Judgey Person, yall. he is very dry and quick. remember that he has a little tiny smidge of a superiority complex. do y’all realize how fun it is to have someone who can just constantly cut through anyone’s shit?? who is very kind but is not, necessarily, nice??? it’s AMAZING. peak comedy. also reminder that there is a fine line with making hunk an awesome amazing talented chef and making him, the only fat character, food obsessed. please do not do that to my boy.

9. i love weirdo aus. like aus that are entirely unique and one and their own. aus for movies that have never been au’ed before. brings me so much joy

10. okay this used to be a big thing for me and i don’t write it much anymore (largely bc i don’t feel i’m very qualified too) but genderqueer lance is very important to me. genderqueer all of the team, honestly, i think we should fuck around with all of their shit, not just pidge! i read this one author who would make literally all of the teams trans & nb and it was awesome. nb hunk was something i never knew i needed but something that was so obviously true. i don’t write it too often bc i tend to make everyone very feminine (i love being a girl i love being a girl so so much it blows my mind that not everyone doesn’t want to be a girl all the time it’s AMAZING and thank you trans women for teaching me that), and i know it’s a genuine problem with over-feminization of queer characters in fanon so i don’t do it to often. but there are some amazing trans authors out there who fuck with the team’s gender beautifully and it’s a pleasure to read every single time!!

11. lol and as my username suggests, i’m a big fan of autistic lance!!! i’m also huge on adhd keith, which i know very few other people have in their fics, but i wrote an essay on it a while back and i do very much agree that autistic lance and adhd keith are canon and i would LOVE to see more people write it!!

12. you said it and i one hundred percent agree — secret dating fics my LOVE. i don’t write them much either bc a lot of my fics are very team-focused but they’re so so fun to read anyway honestly

13. EDIT BECAUSE I FORGOT TO ADD. i love writing lance’s full name as Leandro Agustín Nuñez Carmen Esposita-McClain — or, shortened, Lance McClain

i have so many things honestly. so many tags that are everything to me and also thank you so SO much for the ask i love having a reason to ramble

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performativezippers · 1 year

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Hello :)

I am sending this ask regarding what you recently wrote:

"(If you want to get nerdy with me about thought strands, beat changes, and action beats/dialogue tags, send me an ask and I'd love to get into it)"

I would really appreciate your sharing and getting nerdy!

*cracks knuckles* yeeeeee let's get nerdy! [note omg i'm so sorry this is the longest post in the world. tl;dr: write descriptions within your dialogue when the speaker's thoughts or feelings change so the reader gets the emotional impact you want!]

SO. Something that's really important to me when writing is to remember that very little of what we communicate (in in-person interactions) comes from our words. What I teach in my conflict transformation workshops is that body language gives us 80-90% of what we take in, and the words spoken are the other 10-20%. So what means is that when I'm writing dialogue, I'm mostly writing body language and responses to body language, as well as responses to spoken words.

To use an example of scene that I think is beautifully acted by both Yasmine (dark hair, plays Lucy) and Tori (blonde, plays Kate), but especially Yasmine, take a look at these gifs. [GOD BLESS THE GIF MAKERS, I LOVE YOU SO MUCH] For non-Kacy folks, they're on a date but their relationship is Under Wraps because Kate (blonde) isn't out and they work together. This happens:

I think a great writing exercise to explore these beats is to take a scene like this, where there is so much happening unsaid, and try to write out as detailed a version of the scene as you can. What would it look like to try to perfectly capture this scene in writing? How can you get the reader to feel what Yasmine gets the watcher to feel?

The actual script for this section in the scene is very very short.

Kate: Thank you for caring about how I feel about all of this. Lucy: I very much care. Kate: But I think maybe next time we could go to a normal restaurant. Lucy: Where someone could see us? Kate: *nods* Lucy: Wow. I'm super excited about that. In the interest of full disclosure, I'm almost certain everyone in my office knows what's going on, but they're on my side, so they'll pretend that they don't.

Okay, so. There is so much nuance in this scene that isn't captured by these words on the page. Look at the gifs between "Thank you for caring about how I feel about all of this" and "I very much care." Lucy goes on a fucking journey. Those are all emotion beats, and if you run through the words quickly, you miss them. Even if you write Lucy twists their fingers together and smiles. 'I very much care.' that doesn't hit all of the beats.

Yasmine gives us several different beats there and I think she's a masterclass in acting right here. There's also a long shot of her face that I don't have a gif for before the handholding. The way I would write out this scene for an exercise is to mark each place Yasmine/Lucy has a different thought.

Kate holds out her hand for Lucy's and says "Thank you for caring about how I feel about all of this." Here's what I think happens:

Lucy is surprised that Kate is willing to hold her hand in public

Lucy is surprised that Kate says this, because Kate rarely expresses herself openly

Lucy knows that she's always the one that loves harder, and this is the first time Kate is indicating that maybe she's as deep into this as Lucy is

Lucy tries not to be too excited though because it's still new and she's trying not to be too much

Lucy is often worried about being too much

She tries not to smile as big as she can

She ducks her head down to hide her excited face

She twists her fingers with Kate's because she wants to be actively holding onto to Kate, not just resting her hand in Kate's

It feels really intimate

She tries not to say too much, but she feels so much

She looks right into Kate's face and it's almost overwhelming how much she feels

"I very much care," Lucy says. It's an understatement and it's okay but they both know it.

So all of that is to say that if I were writing this scene into a fic, it would be SO MUCH longer than the script, because I would want to get into each of those beats/thoughts between the time Kate says her line and Lucy says hers.

Okay, then let's drop down for the second example in this same moment. Kate says "Next time maybe we could go to a normal restaurant." This is shocking, right? Lucy clarifies "Where people could see us?" and Kate nods. And then look what happens. Lucy has several lines back to back. When you write it out, it's: "Wow. I'm super excited about that. In the interest of full disclosure, I'm almost certain everyone in my office knows what's going on, but they're on my side, so they'll pretend that they don't."

Let's break that out by delineating emotional or thought changes with a /.

Wow. I'm super excited about that. // In the interest of full disclosure, I'm almost certain everyone in my office knows what's going on, / but they're on my side, so they'll pretend that they don't.

In more detail:

[disbelief] / [surprise] / [oh my god] / [she's willing to be out with me] / [this changes everything] Wow [I didn't know if she'd ever get here] / [I want this so badly] / [Don't make a huge deal out of this though] [Don't spook her] [Act natural] / [Don't be too much] / [Holy shit though] [This is the best thing I've ever heard] [I like her so much] I'm super / [Don't say in love with you] [Don't be too much] / [But show her I want this] [Show her I can see that she's trying] [She's trying so hard] [She's so brave] [Fuck I like her so much] excited about that. // [Oh but shit] [Fuck] [She thinks people don't know and my whole team definitely does] / [I need to be honest with her because honesty is very important to me] [She's being so brave but she's wrong] / [Fuck I hope this is okay, I hope she's not mad] [I love her so much and want her so much] [Please please please be okay with this] In the interest of full disclosure, I'm almost certain everyone in my office knows what's going on, / [it's okay though! they're nice] / [they won't tell your boss] [they haven't told your boss] / [they don't hate you anymore] [they're happy for us] but they're on my side, so they'll pretend that they don't.

So if I'm writing this in a fic, and I say: Lucy grins at her. "Wow. I'm super excited about that! But, okay, in the interest of full disclosure..." I'm asking the reader to intuit the emotional shift from excitement to fear through that space between the two sentences. That means the reader isn't likely to pick up on the depth of the emotions in either beat--won't feel the high and won't feel the low, because you as the writer need to linger there exactly the way the camera lingers on Lucy's face so we can see it all happen.

So that's where I would make sure to use description and an action beat (collectively what I'd call "inner life") to help the reader go on that journey. Something more like:

"Wow." Lucy tries not to react too big, to not shout or jump up or leap over the table to kiss Kate. "I'm super excited about that," she says, which is the understatement of the century, but she's pretty sure Kate can see the truth in her eyes and she's not mad about it. She wants Kate to know that Lucy sees her, sees how hard she's trying, how much she's willing to risk for Lucy. Kate is fucking brave and Lucy is a goner for her, but god damn it, it's only been a few weeks and Lucy's trying to play it cool.

But then something occurs to Lucy, and her heart sinks a little bit. Kate thinks no one knows, but that's not true. Ernie had clocked them within five minutes, and Jesse had only taken another two. Tennant probably knew before Lucy did, honestly. Shit. Okay. Lucy takes a deep breath. "But, um, okay, in the interest of full disclosure?" Lucy swallows hard, trying not to notice the way Kate flinches back a little. "I'm almost certain everyone in my office knows what's going on." Etc.

So anyway, this is a very very long way to say, when there's a change of emotional beat, give it space to breathe. Take your reader on the character's journey. Practicing it on canon scenes might help you get the feel for it, and then you can do it on your own dialogue as well.

Some things I recommend doing if you want to try this:

Read your dialogue loud and do your best acting. Notice when your voice changes, or your face changes. Mark that down as a place for a beat change.

Scroll through your document and notice when you have big chunks of dialogue. Search them for changes in thought or emotions, and then break them up where it works. If there are no changes but it's long, check it for repetition. Maybe you can cut something.

You can use an action tag instead of a dialogue tag to do this efficiently if you're feeling like you've used Lucy said too many times recently or the action is related to the words. For example, instead of "Wow," Lucy said. Her jaw dropped as she took it in. You can try: "Wow." Lucy's jaw hung open as all of the implications crashed into her at once. "I'm super excited about that."

You can add body language tags, including observing the other person's body language, to break it up even if there isn't an emotion beat change. For example: "Wow," Lucy said, her brain going too fast to process. The little muscle in Kate's jaw was twitching, like she was trying not to smile as big as she wanted. Lucy wants to see her beam, though, because Lucy's so fucking happy right now and she hopes Kate is too. "I'm super excited about that."

This is WAY TOO LONG and I'm sorry but in my defense, I said it would get nerdy! Anyway, tell me your thoughts! What strategies do you use? How do you like to do this? What do you disagree with?

#writing advice #ask zipps #emotion beats #writing dialogue

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chenfordspiral · 3 months

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What are your favourite episodes? One per season!

Oh, I had this coming and now I regret sending you that ask because this was bloody difficult. *sigh*

Let's give this a try (I'm sorry for the rambling that is to follow). Full disclosure, though, if you hadn't limited me to one episode per season, this list would look very different 😂 (and would definitely have broken my brain even more than this already has)

season 1 - Plain Clothes Day Good grief, we're off to a brilliant start (why did I do this?!?!) Honestly, I think I love specific scenes more than an entire episode. If I had to choose, though, I might go with 1x11. Or 1x14? 1x20? You see my problem? I cannot make a decision for the life of me. Ugh. I'm gonna go with 1x14 and live with it. Simply because, well, Tim in plain clothes? Yum. Tim refusing to let Lucy wash out and then even complimenting her?! Yum. Lucy being a badass even after she'd initially doubted herself? Yum, love to see it. And let's not forget Lucy's sass at the very end when she hands him her evaluation of him. God, I love them.

season 2 - Day of Death I think it's obvious that I'm going to go with 2x11 here. I adore everything about this episode. Acting, directing, cinematography, music (or lack thereof), all of it. It's simply spectacular, and even though it's a hard episode to watch, I could rewatch it all day. It's absolutely captivating, especially that whole sequence of them searching for Lucy, Tim finding the ring and digging her out of the fucking ground with his bare hands, to the almost absolute silence as we all wait for Lucy to come back. I mean, hands down one of my all time favorite episodes of the show. It can hardly be topped.

season 3 - Man of Honor Overall favorite episode this season is probably.. mh, 3x10. We get Lucy and Jackson riding together and saving that little girl (and then Jackson gives her that necklace?! Kill me, it's so damn sweet). We get some awesome Tim and Angela bestie content. There's just so much to love about this episode and I haven't rewatched it nearly enough.

season 4 - Life and Death You know, season 4 is hard (duh, all seasons are). I have my issues with it, even though I obviously love the Chenford content we got, but it also came with certain love interests that I'd like to give a firm kick in the butt and send to the moon. But I digress. I'm going to have to say 4x01. Aside from the Chenford hug (still not over it) and how Tim so willingly just invited Lucy to stay with him, it's the team spirit of the episode that I love. And I think we all do.

season 5 - Death Notice / Under Siege Season 5 is bloody difficult, okay? This is legitimately breaking my brain. I go back and forth between 5x12 and 5x22 at the moment, which I both love for different reasons. 5x12 because there's so much Chenford goodness, 5x22 because it's just an overall awesome episode that just screams "team" where everyone comes together. I think those kind of episodes will always be my favorite. But honestly, the answer to "what's your fave s5 ep" would probably change every other day. I mean, we all saw the season, right? I could list all 22 episodes with an exception here or there (hi 5x04, I'm looking at you; also not particularly fond of 5x20 - sorry).

And, look. Here's the thing: even when I like an episode for the Chenford content, there's often something that bugs me about it (*cough* Nolan *cough*), so it can't be my favorite episode overall. Like 4x22, for example. It would make my list for favorite Chenford episodes, but not the one for favorite episodes in general. Which is why making this list was so damn difficult.

Anyway. Why am I still rambling?

Anyone feel free to send more questions! My inbox is always open :)

#asked and answered #this was hardddd #Sarah why did you do this to meeee??!#chenford #the rookie #also the rookie has too many episodes with “death” in the title good lord #did I just spent the better part of the past two hours trying to figure this out?#why yes yes I did

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clitfisto · 5 months

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care to elaborate on the miles venom arc?

YES okay so. the thing abt the symbiote is that (like any good corruption arc) it feeds on and amplifies the worst traits of a character, which is pretty straightforward in peters case - his biggest issue is his anger, usually manifesting via retribution (eg. "i missed the part where thats my problem", hunting down uncle bens killer), so his origin story is always the great power/great responsibility thing so he learns to temper that rage. what the symbiote does, practically, is force him to unlearn that foundational character arc and regress to his worst self

since the symbiote really really loves aggression peter parker is literally its dream guy but miles is a little more complex. hes definitely susceptible to that same anger (eg. wanting to "make kingpin pay", the entire sm2 martin li arc) but not as often and nowhere near as hardcore, so the peter playbook wont work as well for him (and also it would be fucking boring. weve seen that shit like 8 times already (not saying symbiote peter is boring i just think modern iterations need to explore new aspects to avoid treading the same ground constantly (sm2 does this very fucking well (also yuri lowenthal is a great va for peter like right up there with josh keaton (i think this many parentheses means im off topic (the adhd demon got me))))))

SO. whats miles' major issue he needs to overcome in his origin story? full disclosure i have not read the comics (but i heard they had some issues with his initial characterization anyway? which is fair enough tbh writing the successor to such an iconic guy is Fucking Hard) so TO ME PERSONALLY!! spider-verse miles is the definitive iteration of the guy and like. we all remember the whats up danger scene, his origin arc is overcoming self-doubt and learning to believe in himself ("its a leap of faith", "youre on your way, just keep going") which, alongside social anxiety (eg. the itsv "everyone knows" scene, sm2 "are you mad at me? it sounds like youre mad at me" dialog), seems to be part of some general anxiety issues. this is pretty well supported by the recent "the spider within" short film (which funnily enough is very fucking reminiscent of some sequences in kravens last hunt, not relevant but kinda cool) which also shows how miles responds by self-isolating, similarly to ps5 miles when peter ignores him

the symbiote can exploit his self-doubt pretty easily, the inherent power boost will do most of the heavy lifting to make him feel like hes not good enough without it - what if he runs out of web at the worst moment? what if hes not strong or fast enough to save someone? what if hes caught mid-costume change because hes so used to the suit changing itself? the more valid the (inital) concerns the better imo

the social anxiety is a tricky one but i think if miles traps himself in a doom loop of self-isolation he might spiral into genuine paranoia, which combined w/ the patented symbiote rage could lead him to lash out at people around him. "everyone secretly hates me so im gonna avoid being around people" -> "i feel alienated from everyone i know so im gonna avoid them even harder" -> "am i 'okay'? why would you care? what are you playing at? fuck off and leave me alone" -> "nobody wants to interact w/ me so everyone who does must have ulterior motives and is therefore a threat to me/my family/my city" -> "im completely isolated but bad things are still happening so people must be conspiring against me w/o my knowledge" -> "literally everyone on earth is out to get me and i need to fight them about it"

from there i think the ideal conclusion is pretty self-evident - miles takes a metaphorical leap of faith (calling back to the lesson learned in his origin arc) by actively choosing to trust someone, reach out and ask for help w/ removing the symbiote and dealing with the contemporary big bad (potentially his local peter variant bc hes got experience w/ symbiote removal and it would tie into the "leap of faith" motif but idk)

so tldr: a miles symbiote arc would be different to peters arcs in some (very interesting) key ways - rather than unbridled aggression he could be characterized by intense anxiety, manifesting as paranoid self-isolation and a sense of dependence on the symbiote suit, and would end the arc by reaching out for help in a symbolic leap of faith

#autism will really have you writing essays recreationally huh.#idk im just saying shit if anyone else has ideas or anything to add i would love to hear it!!

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rockethorse · 1 year

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Do you have any tips or resources for improving at texturing? The stuff you’ve been sharing is brilliant— you capture the maxis feel so well!

Oh, thank you for asking, I'm quite flattered you think so! I have mostly been figuring stuff out through trial and error, so I'm hardly a texturing expert, but I can try and share what I've found works for me.

Firstly, wherever possible/practical I just steal from existing Maxis textures, LOL. Makes sense since we want to recreate that Maxis feel, right? If I can remember an existing texture that could be tweaked to work, then I go grab it at least as a reference. For example with the retextures of Alexander's little shorts-suit that I shared for the GoS challenge, I knew I wanted an oversized, hand-me-down denim jacket vibe... so why not go straight to the source and just grab a denim jacket texture from an adult mesh? Then it's just a matter of figuring out the "gaps" in the mapping and filling them in with airbrushing, clone tools, etc. Sometimes the final texture is completely different, but having the reference helped a lot. I'll also take or reference textures from TS3 and TS4 conversions.

On that note, I think it's immensely helpful for anyone working from a Maxis mesh to grab a UV map if possible. This thread of Maxis UV maps is great, but unfortunately not comprehensive - I can't find elder UV maps anywhere :( But still a great resource! It's especially helpful when you're changing something like necklines and shoes, which are often mapped awkwardly and make it really obvious when seams aren't aligned.

Full disclosure, I was already a digital artist, so I had a leg-up on certain aspects of learning to texture. But I still struggled a lot with hand-painting textures and would often get frustrated because what worked for my art didn't work with The Sims. Eventually I found brushes that worked best for me - this might differ from artist to artist, but I found that scaling airbrush tools down gave me the best balance of softness even for "hard" lines like seams, trim, etc. Using a harder brush stood out as looking too "digital" in-game.

Whenever I'm hand painting something from scratch, I first make sure my idea is possible by editing the alpha. I'll make the texture a bright floodfill like yellow, flatten any bump map, and then tweak the alpha how I'm imagining to see what parts are "meshed on" and where. This helps me figure out the boundaries of collars, necklines, hems, etc. in ways that aren't always obvious on a UV map. If the alpha can be edited the way I'm imagining, then I move on to adding small details like hems, buttons, etc.

Once I have these rough details, I start by adding "shape" to a flat colour with the airbrush tool. This means gradually building up shadows to give a sense of 3D. I often start from the sides to make sure the seams will be the same colour, though I do think it's best to go in afterwards with your UV maps to lighten up certain patches. Then I'll add highlights with the same technique, and start carving areas away to make folds and creases, etc. I do this before I add any texture. Often I'll start with a grey colour, to make recolouring easier later, but if I have a very specific colour in mind I'll do that one first and then make a desaturated version for recolouring later. Since I work with Maxis Match textures, it doesn't matter as much if you lose some detail with this process.

This process of building up a sense of 3D gradually and softly with the airbrush tool and shrinking the airbrush tool down to make finer lines instead of choosing an actual fine-line brush are the two biggest tips that I think improved my handpainted textures!

Also, and I mean this sincerely, but I make it look a bit crummy on purpose. EAxis textures are a wonderful blend of genuinely beautiful hand-painting and abhorrent photoskinning, all of which are flattened and smeared to squeeze onto 2000s hardware. Sometimes stretching or upscaling a texture is exactly what a recolour needs to achieve the "Maxis feel", you know? So don't stress too much about it. I always kind of laugh when I find myself obsessing over a tiny stray pixel or a mis-matched seam in my own content and then find the tackiest suit on MTS from 2004 like "looks great, unzip it". It's probably never gonna look as good in-game as it does in your graphics program anyway. Hair textures are where I truly embrace the fug because I know anyone who wants them is coming for exactly that. If people don't want smeary, slightly-dirty, mismatched-colour-groups hair textures, then they've probably found a different hair system that works for them, lol.

Oh, speaking of graphics programs, I use Krita for all my digital art and retexturing. If anyone is looking to get into making textures and doesn't have access to an art program, I highly recommend it for being free, open-source and powerful. If you're a beginner, then remember also that BodyShop crunches textures, especially for darker colours, so if your textures look pixellated in-game try using SimPE to build the DXTs instead for slightly different compression.

If it's an object I'm retexturing, I'll often clone the object in SimPE and then recolour the clone so that I can preview how it will look in SimPE without having to load the game. This isn't perfect, since there's no lighting in SimPE, so sometimes you won't notice little details that are meshed-on, but it's certainly faster than having to load the game every time, especially if you're making lots of little tweaks or stretching the object's mapping to its limits. I had to do this with the blackboards, the City Living toilets, and the bear chairs.

I think that's about it! If anyone has any more specific questions I can try and answer, and I'll try and add pictures that explain what I'm talking about a bit better the next time I go texture something. But in the end, I think "trial and error to find what works for you" is the best advice, along with "steal from other textures A LOT".

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