#but chapter 2 was just feeling weird since its supposed to be informed by chapter 1

[loganlermanstanaccount]

Show me where it hurts (part 1)

Miguel O'Hara x spiderwoman!reader

(AO3 Mirror), Part 2, Main Masterlist

summary: Miguel's acting weird, and you make it your mission to find out exactly what's going on.

warnings: no warnings for this chap, pg-13, swearing and canon level violence. smut next chapter xoxo

a/n: this is a combination of 2 asks and this post I saw on here a while ago: flirty/ snarky fem reader, Miguel during a ""rut"" (I don't know if it counts as a rut really, but its to do with his animal instincts/DNA) and Lyla playing matchmaker.  I had so much fun writing this, enjoy :D

(i wrote this pre seeing spiderverse 2, so i think characterisation is a little off, esp for Lyla, apologies! I'll fix it in my upcoming fics)

edit: I use the term "bichita" which I have been informed can be read not as I intended in Spanish. I'm not a native speaker so I want to apologise in advance. I'm doing more research for my future fics and leaving this up as a testament to my stupidity. Spanish speakers, feel free to correct me / clown my ass in the comments. My bad guys :(

wc: 3.6k

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You think Miguel is avoiding you. 

One of your closest friends, giving you the runaround for months, it seems. Calling the two of you close friends is a little extreme, sure. You've only known O'Hara for two years, and been in love with him for slightly less than that, thank you very much. And yes, he refuses to call you by anything but your last name. And the last time you saw him he wouldn't so much as look at you, but that was besides the point. 

"..the point," You tell Lyla, in between exasperated bites of cereal, "... is that aren't elite forces of spiderpeople supposed to, you know, have some spiderpeople kick ass once in a while? And where exactly is our fearless leader? I haven't seen O'Hara's scary ass in weeks, and I'm starting to miss it."

She gives you a look, one that says this isn't what I'm programmed for , but you pointedly ignore it. 

"His ass, by the way." You clarify. "I very specifically miss his ass. Remind me to get his routine. I know girls that would kill for…"

"How the fuck did you get in here?" A voice croaks. You turn behind you and see Miguel, not in his suit, but wrapped up in a blanket like he's just woken up. And he looks rough, like a train ran him over on the way here: puffy eyes, splotchy skin, tension kneaded into his brow. 

"Wow." Your spoon drops into the milk. "You look like shit.." 

He furrows his brow even deeper, if that was possible. " Mierda. You shouldn't be here." 

"This isn't quite the welcome party I was expecting, man. I'm the only one to actually turn up to one of your meetings, and this is what I get?" 

"I thought I told Lyla to cancel," He mutters, pinching the bridge of his nose. 

"Cancel? Since when do you miss a chance to talk about rules and protocol?" 

"I don't have time for this-" 

"-and I'm not leaving without a proper explanation. Is everything okay?" 

"It's actually way worse now you're here." He deadpans. 

"Haha ." You turn to Lyla. "You drop everything to travel halfway across the multiverse and this asshole won't even say thanks." 

"Thanks, but this asshole needs you to leave. Now." 

This is the most he's spoken to you in forever, and you hate that you like it. You just want his attention, however it comes. If that means dragging this out so maybe he acknowledges you, touches you, looks at you - then so be it. Squinting, you get closer to him. You scan his face for anything to latch onto. You put a hand on his shoulder, still searching. 

"You sure you're alright? You know you can tell me if-" 

"Si, si." He grits his teeth, looking away. "M'just fine. I'll explain…. later."

"...because I'm your right hand man?" You grin, poking at his brow. "Stop frowning so much Miguel, you're gonna ruin that pretty face of yours."

He flushes, nervous, and swats you away. "-what? N-No. You're not my right hand man and I like my face just the way it is. Now, leave. "

Making your way to the door, you tap your nose teasingly. "You know where to find me!" 

When the door closes with a click, you make your way down the corridor, and stop in your tracks when you hear it. It's muffled, but with the strain of your supersenses you can make out Miguel's voice just beyond the wall. 

"I just…. don't want her to see me like this… Lyla, it's not happening… I can't tell her…." Tell her what, exactly? 

Resolutely, you make up your mind. Miguel O'Hara's got a secret. And before you leave for home, you're gonna do everything in your God given power to wear him down and find out. 

~~~

Despite his insistence otherwise, you liked to think of yourself as O'Hara's right hand man - and most of the other spiderpeople thought so too. You were one of the very first he recruited, after crash landing onto your earth like a spiderman-shaped meteor; the two of you were inseparable. Miguel was stubborn and headstrong and thought he was right all the time. Infuriatingly, he was, but that didn't stop you from telling him to get his head out of his own ass when his ego grew too big. 

He was different around you, you think. Softer, sometimes. Harsher, other times. He told you what you needed to hear whether you wanted to or not; the result of mutual respect and agonising persistence. Slowly, you had chipped away his hard exterior; the one he built because he thought he needed to push people away. In that regard, you were similar, but this need manifested in you like a weed - an awful, awful compulsion to joke and laugh at your own expense, to keep others at an arm's length. You had spent your whole life picking and pruning away at yourself, looking for perfection. Even after all this, multiverse-hopping and fighting alongside people who were the closest things you had to friends , it wasn't enough. There was still something missing. 

Ironically, Miguel had told you something similar the one of the last times you had spoken. You had fucked up a mission, well and truly. In the aftermath, all you can remember is coming back to base, limping on Jessica's arm. 

"She's hurt!" She cries out. Lyla materialises and leads you both to the med bay, inspecting any visible wounds. There's a deep laceration, sticky with blood, at the base of your stomach. You shift onto the bed and hiss with pain. 

Miguel is quick to follow, face twisted with confusion, pain, sadness. Even in your haze, you feel the tension radiating off of him as he drags over a cart of supplies. 

"What happened?" He strains. 

"I don't even… it happened so fast. We got ambushed, and all of a sudden I'm on the ground. I wasn't thinking straight and… " She sobs. "...she jumped in front of me. God, she saved my life-" 

"-wasn't your fault, Jess." You croak, trying to sit up. "And I'm fine. Just need to walk it off…"

"Sit, bichita," His nickname makes you frown, despite yourself, and you settle back down. "Lyla, what's the damage?"

Your vision goes spotty, and Lyla's voice barely registers. All you can feel is searing pain in your side, but Miguel is warm, oh so warm. You clutch his arms, and force him to look you in the eye. 

"M'ready, Miguel." He nods weakly, but you don't think he understands. "I mean it . I can lead, j-just need another chance and I won't let you down… Jess, tell him that I can-" 

"It's okay. I believe you. You just need to relax for me, hmm?" He clutches at your hand, tight, and it's like you're the only two people in the world. "You did good. I promise."

Faintly, you nod. You feel a pinch at your arm, and Jessica's there, with an empty vial of something in her hands. The pain washes over you, and you fight to keep your eyes open. In those last few moments of light, you swear you feel a shaky kiss pressed to your temple. 

"Sleep, mi bichito amoroso. Sleep."

When you come to, you're still in the medbay, moonlight streaming through. Well, artificial moonlight. Time worked a little differently here, something Miguel explained to you a while ago - God knows what about dilation and quantum interference. It makes you smile now, remembering his frustration as he tried to explain to no avail. You were the only spiderman this side of the multiverse without a degree in quantum tech, you had said with a lopsided smile. 

You move to sit, and pain shoots up your side. Groaning, you push through it, determined to get out of this bed and find the others. As if on cue, Miguel walks in, almost leaping towards you. 

"You should… mierda ! You should be resting in bed."

You pout as you stumble into his chest. He hooks an arm around you and leads you back. You clamber in, sighing. "M'fine, O'Hara."

"Your guts were halfway out of your body less than 24 hours ago. So stay put, or you might give me another heart attack."

You scoff, incredulous. "You were worried?" 

He shrugs. " 'Course I was."

"Why? You know I'm practically indestructible." You give him a shit eating grin, and poke the frown appearing at his brow. He doesn't bat you away like he usually does. 

"Famous last words, bichita." He sighs. You can't speak a lick of Spanish, but you know he only calls you that word when you've frustrated him to his limit. So you take it as a win, for now. 

He drops into the chair next to you. "How are you feeling?" 

"Just peachy, dollface." You wink, and he doesn't so much as groan. 

"I'm being serious. You went through something pretty traumatic…"

"You want me to tell you it hurts, so, so bad, daddy? " You pout and flutter your eyelashes mockingly. Miguel shifts in his seat, unable to make eye contact. 

"That's not what I meant."

"What did you mean, O'Hara? I feel fine. And in a couple of days, I'll feel even better, and I'll be up and about. I can finish what we started and-" 

"-no, absolutely not." He frowns. "A couple of days? I'm sending you home-" 

"You can't do that! On whose fucking authority?"

"On the authority of you almost fucking died ! Keeping you safe is our priority right now-" 

"God, is this my punishment? This is a low blow, O'Hara. You know how hard I've worked for this: months of surveillance and intel a-and I did everything by the book, just like you told me to." You croak. "I fucked up . I know that, and I feel terrible. Give me a chance to make things right; that's all I'm asking. I can do it, I know it. "

He looks at you for a moment, something heavy in his expression. His face contorted, he strips you down to the bone with just his gaze. His voice is so quiet, you almost miss it. 

"....you're still trying to prove yourself, aren't you?"

Honestly, it catches you off guard. You don't even know what the fuck that means, let alone why he said it.

"I don't… I d-don't…?" 

"They all love you. Respect you. More than me I think, sometimes." He chuckles at that. "You're good at what you do. The best . What else are you trying to prove? What else do you need ?" 

Your throat goes dry. You couldn't speak if you wanted to. 

"I'm not punishing you. You made a mistake, but you don't need to be crucified for it. I just want to keep you safe. I can't… we can't lose you."

"Miguel-"

"-this isn't a discussion. And I'm not trying to argue, although I know how much you like to argue." He inches closer, cupping your face gently. You try to move away, blinking back tears. But his hands are steady and he strokes your jaw with so much tenderness you think you hear your heart break. He's pretty, so pretty. You don't deserve him, you think. "There'll be time to fight, bichita. Rest. That's your mission right now."

"C-can't sleep." You breathe. "It hurts." 

Miguel pauses, head tilted like he's thinking. He taps your shoulder. "Scoot over."

You do as he says, and he slips into the bed with you. It's a tight fit, but he manages, placing you on his chest with an arm gently around your shoulders. You bury your face in his hoodie, sniffling and hoping he doesn't notice you choking back sobs. Absentmindedly, he settles into a rhythm, gentle breathing and playing with your hair, soothing you softly. He pretends he can't hear the tears. 

"M'gonna stay here until you're asleep. For as long as you need."

You nod, unable to speak for fear of breaking down. 

~~~

The days after felt like a blur. You woke up to Miguel gone, and an ache in your heart. Jess visits as much as she can, and Ben calls you a couple times, to see if you're okay. Peter B brings Mayday, and she clambers all over your bed, bringing some life into the room. Miguel doesn't visit per se - you hear whispers of him, Lyla visiting in his stead for comprehensive status updates. Once, you wake up in the night to see him on the adjacent chair, head lolling in deep sleep. He looks peaceful, calm - one of the first times you haven't seen his brow furrowed with worry. Of course, he's gone by the morning. 

The very last time you saw him, he opened the portal home. It was weird, after everything, but if Miguel felt the same you wouldn't know. Talking at a thousand miles a minute, he alternates between assuring you they'll be fine without you and situation reports from spider people all across the multiverse. Things you'd missed whilst bedbound, asking for advice before you left. He trusted your judgement and the thought warmed your heart, almost making you forget that he completely brushed past the previous nights before. 

You still remember the last thing he had said to you, which would've been weeks ago, now. 

"...and if you need anything, and I mean anything, you call me directly. Not Jess, not Ben, and certainly not Peter B. Call me, and I'll answer, I promise. You need help, you need advice, you just need someone to talk to, then-"

"-I call you. I get it, O'Hara. Will do." He opens the portal, watching as you walk towards it. He can't take his eyes off of you, even though you can't see him. At the last moment you turn, and run towards him. You almost knock him over with a hug. Burying his head in the crook of your shoulder, he hugs you back, ever careful of your injury. Separating, your smile almost knocks him over again. Weakly, he smiles back as you head through the portal, back home. 

You're left with that feeling, of his arms around your body - warm, so warm - as you putter about by the switchboard. After careful deliberation (you were really, really bored ) you'd taken to manage the Multi Modal Multiversal Switchboard - as aptly named by Miguel. Everyone else called it the Big Red Phone of course, but he had insisted on calling it by its proper name . Every. Time. 

The thought makes you chuckle as you call up Peter B. His icon flashes on the screen in front of you. With a click, he picks up the call, his face materialising holographically in front you. A little hand reaches up and tugs at his ear. 

"Ow… ouch … Dad's on the phone, honey."

"Aww! How's my favourite Parker doing?" 

"Not bad, actually! MJ just made us probably the best burger this side of New York-"

"-sorry, Peter? Me and May are trying to have a conversation." You hear her giggle in the background. Her gap toothed grin pops into frame and she babbles excitedly. "...yeah, exactly May. That's literally what I said."

"Okay, okay, that's enough." He puts the toddler down and watches her scurry away. "You're feeling better, I see."

"Yeah, back in action. Thought I'd check in."

"All good here." He squints, trying to take in your surroundings. "You're at HQ?" 

You hum.

"Could've sworn Lyla cancelled…"

"Yeah, didn't get the memo. But I think something's wrong with O'Hara."

He gives you a weird look. "Uhhh, what makes you think that?" 

"He won't even look at me. Was it something I said? Something I did?" Your eyes narrow. "...what do you know, Peter?"

"Nothing! Absolutely nothing!" He scoffs, a little too quickly, clutching his chest like you've offended him. He's stared down some of the scariest villains around, but the look you give him is truly chilling. "Just… uhhh. You didn't hear this from me." 

"Naturally…"

"We tracked 'em down, the guys that ambushed you and Jessica."

"The Sinister Six? From Earth-215?"

"Yeah, but by the time we got there, it was just Kraven and some of his goons. Miguel got there first, and…." He gulps. "He was pissed. Trashed the whole place looking for the rest of 'em. Beat Kraven half to death and we had to pull him off."

"Shit."

"Yeah, it was pretty rough. Never seen him like that before. And just generally? He'd been weirdly quiet, a little grumpy, more aggressive on missions. I don't know what's gotten into him."

"Hmmm. Thanks, Pete."

"No problem, sweetheart. And if the big guy asks… "

"...this didn't come from you, I know." Weakly, you smile. "Say hi to my favourite Parkers, for me." 

" 'Course I will. We should celebrate, if you're back officially. Mine and MJ's is always open."

"Good to know. I'll see you around."

He waves goodbye, and the hologram clicks off. Sighing, you try to piece together what you've just heard. 

Miguel: acting weird. Well, you knew that already. Aggressive was new. And Lyla? She had canceled, but not for you, for some reason. An honest mistake, perhaps. But Lyla doesn't make mistakes… 

You stew for a couple of hours, puttering about the switchboard, twiddling your thumbs. Something's wrong, and for some reason you're afraid to see him. To have him look straight through you, again, when you ask to do the same. Show me where it hurts. Tell me how to make it better.  

On the way there, you chew your lip in anticipation. In the corridor, you're outside the door to his place, hand hovering above the door. To knock, to call. In the harsh fluorescent light, you hesitate. 

"Lyla?" Nervously, you sink down onto the floor. It's hard to explain, but you don't expect her to actually come; to materialise in front of you. 

"How can I assist you?" She says with a ding. 

"Uhh… hi. Just wanted to talk." You pause, clicking your tongue. "Can you be honest with me?" 

"I can only be honest with you. It is not in my programming to lie, unless specified by my owner."

"Sure. Cool. It's about him, actually. Is Miguel okay?" 

She tilts her head, as if processing your request. "Okay is a subjective term. Is Mr O'Hara alive? Yes. Is Mr O'Hara physically well? Yes. By those terms, he is okay ."

Too vague for your own liking. "I guess I meant more… his emotional state. To the best of your knowledge… in your opinion , Lyla: is Miguel okay?" 

"...I believe Mr O'Hara is experiencing some emotional turmoil."

You frown. "Oh. Do you know why?" 

"Mr O'Hara has instructed me not to disclose that information with you."

"Fair enough. But you don't have to tell me… I could just ask questions?" 

She nods. "There is nothing in my programming that prevents me from answering some questions within certain parameters." 

"Did I do something? Not just today but… last time I was here. Did I say something to hurt or upset him? Is that why he's acting weird?"

"No." She says blankly. "And yes. I suppose it is… complicated." She gestures around that word. 

"I'm a little confused, Lyla."

She sits next to you, on the cool tile. Not that she could feel it, but it feels more intimate - like two friends talking. The extent of Lyla's consciousness, you weren't sure of. Was she alive? To you, she might as well be. Could she think, feel, emote? Maybe, maybe not. You weren't smart enough to understand the nuances of her programming. But you were human enough to see it in her - something glittering beyond the surface. 

It could be projection, but you swear her voice is softer. "He has a name for you. When he speaks about you, and to you. I have it logged in my memory database. Do you know what that is?" You shake your head. 

Lyla opens up her palm and projects videos and images - little Miguel's popping up in her palm, tinny and gruff voices ringing through the hallway. They say your name, shout your name, whisper it. Some say other things in Spanish. Curse words had always been your assumption, and he had given you no reason to think otherwise. Now, having it played back to you, you hear a tenderness in his voice you would've missed. Words and phrases that come up again and again…

"Bichita." She repeats. "Bichito del amor. Mi bichito amoroso. "

You shake your head, still confounded. "...I don't speak Spanish, Lyla." 

"Little bug. Sweetheart. Lovebug. My little lovebug." She clears her throat. "I believe they are terms of endearment."

Steadfast, she directs you towards her palm. Another small Miguel appears, and you think it's him from this morning. 

"I thought I told you not to let anyone in, Lyla?" 

"I did not let her in. She let herself in using the code you previously gave her, Mr O'Hara."

"Yeah, for emergencies. Fuck. Mi bichita, too smart for her own good."

"...If you are in distress, I believe she would understand, Mr O'Hara."

"I just think it's too much. I don't want her to see me like this." 

"According to Alchemax files, previous subjects showing this kind of aggression benefitted from-"

"Lyla, it's not happening, no chance. I can't tell her."

The figure blinks out of her palm. "Mr O'Hara has forbid me from telling you about certain things."

"...but not from showing me." Your eyes meet hers. You give her a watery smile. "Thank you." 

With a hint of a smile, she nods and is gone from the corridor. You are left alone, with nothing but your thoughts of little lovebugs rattling around in your brain.

_

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_

#miguel o hara x reader #miguel o'hara x reader #miguel o'hara #spiderman 2099 #spiderman 2099 x reader #across the spiderverse #kat_writes😼 #this gif is fucking crazy btw

[katapotato55]

Deltarune theory: Kris, Noelle, and Ralsei (Kris may not hate Ralsei THAT much) and other misc theories.

obviously spoilers for Deltarune up to chapter 2 and some of the Spamton sweepstakes. play the game it's free on steam. also this is a little bit long and contains a lot of screenshots. Not a huge amount of text walls I am just crazy. more info after the cut.

(credit to the deltarune wiki for these screenshots) So a common theory is that the health gained from the tea represents how close emotionally characters are to each other. If a character does not know someone else, the tea appears as nothing, such as Noelle having no reaction to the Ralsei tea, since at that point in the game they never met. People often use this as an implication that Kris does not like ralsei very much. but here is the thing that gets me:

Kris seems to get damn near the same amount of HP from Noelle as they do Ralsei. and that is confusing... because aren't they supposed to be childhood friends? meanwhile Susie used to bully Kris as implied by the Spamton sweepstakes... and yet Susie's tea gives Kris the MOST health out of all of them. not to mention Noelle seems to share the same amount of health return, but doesn't hate the tea either. What on earth is going on here?

The Theory (s?)

The unfun theory: The health means absolutely nothing. Personally I don't like this theory if you couldn't tell already. The spicy friendship theory: Kris doesn't hate Ralsei THAT MUCH, they are just uneasy about them. Alternatively: Kris probably just gets along better with someone like Susie than someone like Ralsei. The climax in every children's movie ever theory: before the events of Deltarune, something happened that made Kris upset at Noelle and it harmed their relationship. (possibly something to do with Des) The BFFSBSROFL (no that acronym does not stand for anything) theory : kris actually gels SO well with susie that they are basically best friends, making Noelle and Ralsei look pathetic in comparison. Alternatively, Kris and Susie have a much deeper history that the Spamton Sweepstakes left out. Alternatively: it could also be that Susie is the first strong friendship Kris has had in a very long time and they are in the honeymoon phase of their friendship. The shippers wet dream theory: Kris has a thing for Susie after the events of ch 1 and is jealous of Noelle. (I claim no financial responsibility for whatever the fuck the shipping part of the fandom may do with this potential bit of information.) The "my parent's friend's kids" theory: Kris never really was that close to Noelle to begin with, Its just that the Dreemur family and the Holiday family go way back and Kris being a kid was just in the middle of it. These are the theories I have so far, let me know if you guys have anything more interesting.

Other things to mention

The Laser prank. During that scene with Noelle with chapter 2, the player finds a switch that requires the player and Noelle to press a button and let each other through the laser barrier. as a player you can suddenly jump off the button before noelle passes as a joke. however, if you go too far and do it right when Noelle is too close to the laser:

you almost hurt Noelle (but she is ok) and then she pulls the same prank on Kris. then:

If you don't go too far with the prank, Noelle simply says "nice teamwork" and you continue on. This is interesting to me for many reasons. here is a few theories I have listed: 1-Kris actually was hurt (unlikely because their HP was not lowered and the player did not touch the laser) 2- Kris actually DOES care about Noelle and is horrified the player almost hurt her 2.5- Or perhaps Kris does care about Noelle and is horrified she did the prank back at them as serious as the laser was. Perhaps Kris has weird feelings about abandonment and self love considering their parents divorce and all that has been going on in this game 3- Kris is just being petty and immature that they got pranked right back. 4- Kris is potentially mis-reading the situation thinking that the player and Noelle are somehow against Kris, when in reality both the player and Noelle are just playing around. Remember that Kris is a young teenager going through a rough patch at home, so it makes sense they are on edge about this kind of thing. 5- I am reading way too deep into this bit.

The Boat Picture with Ralsei listen man. Its no secret Ralsei resembles Asriel. hell there is a STRONG implication that Ralsei is actually Kris's childhood red horns headband considering Ralsei also has red horns.

here is the bit that gets to me sometimes: Later on in Ch 2, you are on a boat ride with ralsei and a photo booth. you have the option to Hug Ralsei, show a peace sign in the wrong direction, or commit cultural appropriation against Berdly in particular (my favorite option yes i am very mature)

why does this sit with me? well-

First: daawwww asgoooooreeee second: what does this mean- there are so many implications, Again i am just going to list theories and speculation: 1- Kris does not appreciate the gremlin that looks suspiciously like their older brother and how said gremlin may be crushing on them, along with the player pushing that along. enough said. 2- Kris is OK with hugs, they just don't like it when their dad gives them a massive cuddly bear hug. 3- kris is being an angsty teen acting like they are too good for hugs. 4- Again I am probably overthinking it and Kris actually does not hate hugs (or hugging ralsei) that much. Overall, I think Kris Kross Applesauce's real problem is less about the hugging and the pranking of Noelle, but rather something deeper. behold!

THE OMEGA THEORY

Kris just wants agency over their own life. It isn't that deep really. It is implied that Kris... honestly doesn't like themselves very much and doesn't like being human. The fact they never grew horns growing up and wore plastic horns all the time was probably the first time Kris felt like an outsider, and all they wanted to do was to be like their family. and now their parents are divorced Their older brother has been off for university and can only come back on certain occasions Sans Undertale is probably fucking their mom (or sans is just messing with you because sans is a hilarious asshole) Kris probably has trauma from whatever happened to December Holiday (which has not been revealed yet other than Spamton sweepstakes hinting) And now, Kris appears to be possessed by SOMETHING. and who the hell knows what and who is posessing kris. it could be you the player doing that or perhaps the player IS kris and that the thing possessing kris is what threw the player in the cage or more. we don't know yet But the thing i know most is that all Kris just wants is to have more control over their own life. Hell considering the implication that Ralsei is the manifestation of Kris's childhood headband, perhaps Ralsei represents a part of who Kris wishes they were. either way It doesn't matter if the player messes with Noelle or hugs Kris's friend that uncomfortably resembles their brother Kris just wants it to be THEIR decision rather than the decision of an omnipotent god that has a strange affliction for hyper-analyzing their life to make an overly-produced Tumblr post. thank you for reading my crap.

#deltarune #deltarune chapter 2 #deltarune chapter two #ralsei #kris deltarune #kris dreemurr #noelle holiday #deltarune susie #deltarune theory #deltarune speculation #pc gaming #gaming #theory #theories #media analysis #deltarune fandom #deltarune kris #deltarune noelle #deltarune ralsei

[adabisworld]

Chapter-2

Stars to my moon

Genre: Soulmate Au! Idol Au! Angst;fluff;drama;romance, poly Au!

Pairing: ot7×f!OC

Summary: He took big strides, halting right in front of me as he bends to my eye level, causing me lean back a little. I could feel his breath fanning my face, looking into his eyes, I could see a storm of anger into them.

"We have been nothing but considerate of you and your feelings, while all you've given in return is rejection and cold shoulder since day one." He grits out.

when Selene's 22nd birthday doesn't go as she expected, her world turns upside down, making her resent her soulmates. Will she ever come to accept them in her life or will she continue to run away holding onto her past love?

word count: 5k(approx)

   Chapter-2

Jin has tried everything in his power to search for her soulmate. When they reached the dorm from the airport that night, the maknaes had already spread the news to the other members, who then asked him the same questions the maknaes did in the car. He looks at his soul mark, remembering the excitement of his members. He knew they were happy for him but it wasn't just happiness in their eyes but also hope. Hope that they too can meet their soulmate and that it wasn't impossible to do so in their world.

They only just set foot in the dorm when the members bombarded Jin with questions about his soulmate, letting him know the maknaes didn't hold back from sharing the information with the other members.

"Yah!" he raises his voice, making the members go quiet.

"One by one, I'll answer all your questions one by one! Namjoon-ah, you go first." he says as they all settle on the couch in the living room, leaving their luggage at the entrance; that could be handled afterward.

The latter opens his mouth "Do you know who it is, Hyung?" 

Jin knew his first question will be; " It must be the girl I bumped into since it's clear the mark appeared at the airport." He says.

"How can you be sure, Hyung? There were so many people at the airport. It could be any one of them." The question comes from Suga, leave it to this guy to always ask the most rational questions.

"Because when I touched her forehead, this weird zap of electricity passed through us and I know she felt it too. Also, I didn't come in contact with any other person besides us, our team, and her. So she has to be the one to give me this." He explains while looking fondly at his mark and making the younger nod in response.

"How are we going to find her then? Do you know her name? how she looks?" Hoseok questions.

"I didn't have the time to ask her name but I do know that she cursed in Spanish, maybe its her first language so she might be a Spaniard or Mexican.

And from appearance, she had beautiful amber almond-shaped eyes and brunette hair. Her complexion was wheatish. And oh! She had a mole a little beneath her left eye. That's all I know." Jin answerd lost in his own world just thinking about his soulmate. 

"We should tell the company, they'll be able to find her before us." 

As per Taehyung's advice, Jin told their CEO, Bang Si Hyuk, the very next day over dinner.

 "So, how did your shoot go? And performance? Anything interesting happened?" the question was asked casually by his Hyung but one that had his heart racing, he was nervous about telling him the news; he didn't know how he'll react, as their boss or their older brother. He was hoping for it to be the latter.

"The shoots went great, the music video for Black Swan came out a masterpiece really. Everyone worked so hard. And the performance was good too; we enjoyed it, hopefully, we'll perform our own song at the Grammys soon." He replies. "Our schedule is packed for later this month with the release of the album. We all are a little nervous but we hope our fans will love this album as much as the other ones."

"We'll have a celebratory dinner soon, for the success of the album, I suppose." Band Pd Nim says knowing well their Army will never let them down.

"Hmm. Also, yes something interesting did happen but not in the states rather when we landed. I got my soul mark" he says showing him his ring finger, making the older freeze for a second before he opened his mouth with a big grin "Congratulations! Jin. Why didn't you lead with that? That's great news. You should've brought them along, I would love to meet them."

His reply led Jin to release a breath of relief. "That's the problem, I had an encounter with her briefly at the airport but I didn't know she was it at the time. I found out later, So I need your help to find her. She's a tourist, as far as I know. We don't know for how long she'll be here."

" Don't worry, we'll find her. I'll spread the news in the circle," his hyung reassures. 

The company started the search for the girl the best they could with the provided information; Jin was also doing his part, trying to find her on social media.

There wasn't much he could do, being a celebrity.

With each passing day, Jin started to become more and more gloomy. The members tried to keep his spirits up, they even had an argument with the searching team for showing such incompetency. His mood was making his members worry for him, sure not having found their soulmate even after so many years bothered the other members deeply but they knew even though Jin didn't show it, he was the most affected by this fact, and now when he knew he did have one, fate was playing games with him. All they wanted was for him to be happy.

Unfortunately, Luck wasn't on his side; a week passed but the company couldn't find any trace of the girl in the capital but considering the size and population of Seoul, there was still hope. At least that was what Jin was being told. 

 ---------------------------------------------------

Jin was sitting on the couch in the living room with Jungkook. They were trying to find his soulmate on social media; the maknae came up with the idea a few days ago. The latter showed him his skills and knowledge of the online world; when they heard Namjoon.

"Hyung!" he comes in wheezing, bending down with both his hands on his knees trying to catch his breath.

Seeing his state, Jin gets up to get him a glass of water. Being the eldest, he has always tried his best to take care of the members, always taking care of their needs.

"Thank you, Hyung." Namjoon says, taking the glass from his hands and drinking its contents.

"Now, care to explain why you're in such a hurry?" Jin asks, quirking an eyebrow at him.

"Hyung, can you please describe your soulmate to me again?" he requests.

Jin nods, pulling back the memory he has been visiting often in the past week. He tries to describe her as close to reality as he could; mentioning her mole beneath the left eye, her amber eyes, brunette hair that he is sure goes just far enough to settle at the middle of her back, and all the other little details he didn't have time to process at that time.

His words make Namjoon's eyes wide "It was her!" he whispers to himself though the older could already hear, considering their proximity.

"Who, Namjoon-ah?" he asks just to make sure what he heard was right.

"Her Jinnie-Hyung! Your soulmate!" he exclaims. His words make Jin's heart beat a little faster, hope; that's what he's feeling right now.

"Where? How? when?" He blurts out his question, all ready to bolt out the door to find his soulmate.

"I was at Han river, that's where I met her! I don't know if she's still there, but we should go check." Jin nods and moves to grab the car keys, but Jungkook beats him to it, announcing he's driving.

"I drive better than you, Hyung!"

On the drive, Namjoon is again bombarded with questions by Jin about his soulmate.

"How do you know it was her?" "Did you talk to her?" "Did you ask her name?"

"Hyung! Calm down! she had the same features as you told, not to forget the mole beneath her left eye."

"And her name is Selene."

"Selene." Jin tries her name on his tongue. Such a lovely name.

"Do you know anything else?" he asks again, before the former could say anything in return.

"We're here!" The maknae informs them.

All of them get out of the car.

They search for her from one corner of the bridge to another; in the cold wind, they didn't even remember to bring their coats. But that doesn't matter, for them, the most important thing right now was to find Jin's soulmate.

"Where did you last see her, Namjoonie Hyung!"

"There," the older replies, pointing to the bench near where he left her.

"We should also look at the park." "Good idea, Jungkookie. You go there with Hyung; I'll keep on looking here."

As Namjoon is left alone, he ponders if he should tell his Hyung everything he learned about her. Most importantly, should he tell him she doesn't want a soulmate? That she hates the idea of having a soulmate right now? Shouldn't he give him some kind of warning regarding her past? But he, himself, told her that there's no harm in spilling her heart's content to a stranger, and she trusted him. How can he break her trust? And why does he care about her;some stranger he met an hour ago?

It would be wrong to cheat her. What if she doesn't trust anyone else with her secrets again if he breaks it now?

But can he lie to his Hyung? He brushed the subject off when he asked before; What will he say if he asks again? If he does lie and later Jin gets to know about him being aware of her past, will he forgive him? Better yet, will he be able to forgive himself?

His heart grows heavy, having to choose between doing the right thing and having his Hyung's back. How can he solve his heart's dilemma?

No, he shakes his head. Jin is a charming man; he'll be able to make his place inside her heart. Even if it'll take time, he has absolute confidence in his Hyung. She thinks right now that she won't be able to love someone again, especially, her soulmate but they're meant to be; they are each other's halves; eventually, Jin will grow on her.

After looking for a while, the members meet up again feeling dejected.

To Jin, it felt like having something you desire so close and not being able to reach it. And close she was, why couldn't the universe just give him a break; let him have one thing without struggle? Maybe he wasn't its favorite; after so many years of misery, it showed him a glimmer of hope, only for his sky to fill back up with dark clouds. He sighs, having no idea how much longer he can play this game with the universe.

On their way back home, Namjoon tells them that they should talk with Bang PD Nim tomorrow. The new information might help to find her a little quickly.

As everyone moves to go back to their rooms, Jin feels a hand on his shoulder;

"Don't worry Hyung, even if we couldn't find her today, we did come a step closer after knowing her name. You'll meet her soon enough." Jungkook consoles, making him smile sadly at him as he nods his head in return and disappears into his room.

Namjoon is lying in his bed looking up at the ceiling, lost in thought; trying to justify why he risked his safety today when he saw her crying. What was it about her that pulled him towards her, wanting nothing more than to wipe those tears away? Was it because she's Jin Hyung's soulmate? but he didn't know about that fact before, so why was he acting that way? How could he be attracted to his Hyung's soulmate?

---------------------------------------------------

Selen's pov-

On my first day in Busan; I went to the Haeundae beach for a relaxing day. But it turned out not to be the best decision. Seeing all these couples, it just broke my heart further, to not have Eric by my side anymore. He had the ability to make everything better for me.

 I stayed at the beach soaking up the sun, trying to ignore all the couples, for 3 long hours before deciding to have had enough of it.

I packed my stuff up and throw over a dress over my red strip bikini, ready to get out of this personal hell.

I wander around the streets of Busan for an hour before I see an Art museum. I've always loved art; even though I have no idea or experience in anything related to it, I mean sure I tried but it turned out to be a disaster, I decided just then to spare the universe of my doings. I still love the art of making something come alive with your imagination and the brush of your hands. 

I walk around the museum; looking at the paintings, trying to decipher the meaning behind each one. That's my favorite part about it, guessing what message was the artist trying to convey with their art. 

My day ends up in a pretty restaurant. I try their Kimbap with Jajangmyeon noodles for the first time after coming to the country. And to say it was delicious would be an understatement, makes me think about why did I wait so long to eat these dishes. For most of my first week here, I was eating the dishes I knew of and tried before like ramen and rice and all. 

The next day, I go to see the infamous Oryukdo Skywalk and boy did it take my breath away. The view was so serene I would set my camp up here if I could. I mean, I knew Korea was beautiful but I didn't know it was this breathtaking. My only regret would be not sharing this experience with Eric. If only we had come here before everything went downhill. Thinking about him my hands automatically go to feel the necklace on my neck; it has become a habit of mine now. Every time I think about him, my hands hold the necklace as if to assure me of his presence.

I spend my whole day at the Skywalk; enjoying the scenery and serenity of the place. I have seen people here giving me side eyes mostly because I am a foreigner but I know it's also because of my skin. Being kind and respectful, Korea still had its dark side which was the beauty standards they have set for women here. I don't get affected by it anymore; I was a south Asian adopted by a lonely widow Spaniard woman, I have experienced these side-eyes all my life. I'm not brown but my skin color is still a little dull though that wasn't the main reason I was bullied in high school but rather for being of a different race and having a different ethnicity.

Except for my genes, I have gotten nothing from my birth country. Even my name was chosen by my mom, she changed whatever name I had before, the reason being that it was my new start and why would I want to keep something of my birth parents when they didn't even want to keep me and fair enough.

My little picnic is interrupted by the sound of rumbling coming from my stomach, reminding me I have yet to eat something since breakfast. I sigh, getting up from my place and brushing my jeans off any dirt. I make my way trying to find a good restaurant nearby on my phone. 

After getting my fill, I call a cab to go back to my Hotel. 

On my third day in Busan, I got a little cultural and visited the Haedong Yonggungsa Temple. Upon arrival, I was greeted by 12 zodiac stone figures.

I love visiting temples, and this one, in particular, is beautiful, nestled on a mountain. The weather was exceptionally good too, which added to the charm of the Temple. Climbing the steps didn’t feel tiring and I was pumped up to find out what made this temple such a hit with locals and tourists. The place is beautiful, overlooking the ocean. I stayed till 4 in the evening to explore the place, making a wish at their lucky pond, basking in the calm of the place, before moving on to the next stop for the day.

By the time I reach the Bupyeong kkangtong Night market, the sun started to set. I pay the driver and look at the hundreds of options for me to feast on. The food choices range from caramelized fruits to many kinds of skewers, pancakes & special delicacies that are specialties of Busan. I heard it was the perfect place to experience Busan's food culture, and I can see why so. The place was amazing; the street was covered to protect the stalls sizzling with deliciousness. 

I try many things; Fish, silkworm, and a couple of fusion dishes with some dessert. The food was delightful.

As I was going to get a drink I felt my phone buzz, seeing the caller ID, my lips curl upwards, I had yet to talk to my mother after coming to Busan so I was glad to see her call. 

"Hi, Mama. How are you?" I answer the call with questions spurting out of my mouth.

"I'm good, Mi Hija. You tell me how are you?" She questions back.

"I'm great, Mama. Trying to explore the culture. I'm at the Night Market right now, It's known for its street food and Mama, is it delicious. I wish you could taste it as well."  I say, not watching where I was going I bump into a man.

"Sorry!" I say, briefly looking back at the masked man before moving forward.

"Maybe next time. Did you get something for me yet?"  She asks me making me roll my eyes still smiling.

"Yes, Mama. Did you think I'll forget? Have some faith in your daughter Mama." I reply 

"Of course not, Mi Hija. I was just curious. What did you buy?" obviously not saying the truth. I let it go.

"Nah-uh, I'm not telling," I say, calling over for the taxi.

"Actually, Mama I wanted to speak to you about something." 

"Yes, Mi Hija." 

"I was looking for a university to enroll for my Masters. Would Seoul be a bad idea for it?"

"No, my baby. If you want to do your study in Seoul, you should." She reassures me, following up with, "You liked Seoul that much huh?"

"It's a really nice place, it gives me calm." She hums in response. 

"Well, we'll see to the formalities. Choose a university and look for a place then." "And Mi Hija, You'll be alright,"  she says before cutting the call. 

Her words make my hand reach for my locket once again. But all I felt was my skin. I looked down at my chest but it wasn't there. I move around my seat searching for it, but it wasn't there either. My heart started pounding rapidly, as tears filled my eyes. All I could think was I couldn't lose it, that was the last thing Eric gave me. The necklace was the last link between him and I, something i wasn't ready to let go of yet.

---------------------------------------------------

I went back to the market, frantically searching for the piece on the trail I took. I looked everywhere, but it was nowhere. Did someone found it? Did they throw it away? How am I going to find them? I tried asking the stall managers if they found it or saw someone take it. But it wasn't getting me anywhere. All they did is shook their heads; no one saw anything.

I searched for my precious gift for 2 hours; it was getting late. The rush on the street was disappearing. The night was getting quieter as I sat there crying on the side of the footpath. Why does the universe like to play games with me so much? Now it took the last memory of Eric from me. Why could it not just give me a fucking break? I was so fucking sick and tired of its bullshit.

A hand came on my shoulder; I looked up to see an aged man, around his sixties he must be, by the looks of the wrinkles on his face.

"Trouble, child?" He asks me with a soft smile.

I shake my head, sniffling. I use my jumper's sleeves to make sweater paws to wipe my nose.

"I lost my locket. Have you seen it anywhere?" I ask him, taking out my phone, and showing him a close-up picture of me so the necklace would be visible.

"No. I'm sorry, child. It must mean so much to you to be fussing over it this much." He says. I nod in reply.

"It's okay; I'm sure you'll find it. Come back in the morning to look for it in the daylight. It's too late for you to sit here all alone like this."

"But what if it's not gone yet and someone takes it by then?"

"Someone might have already taken it. You can't put yourself in danger over what-ifs child. Go home."

I nod, getting up and bowing down to say thank you to him before making my way to flag down a taxi.

My only hope now is to come back early in the morning to search for it. I am not ready to lose it.

-------------

Jimin and Jungkook came back to visit their families during the break. The others, too, went back to their home cities hoping to spend some quality time with their own families before they start the promotions of the album.

Both the members agreed to meet for drinks and their tradition to see who can eat more street food. Which was nothing more than justifying the amount of food they were going to devour. If they present it as a bet, the people won't judge. Or that's what their logic says.

The fellows skipped on the street, teasing each other. Happy with being surrounded by so much food. They knew they were going to have to work harder in the gym. To balance their bodies after consuming all of this fat here, but right now, they couldn't care less. It was all worth it in their eyes.

"Jungkook-ah, can you eat seven packets of ramen in one sitting by yourself?" Jimin asks, making him raise his eyebrow.

"Yah! Jiminshi. Wanna make a bet?"

Jimin backs down immediately, "No, No. Pfttt. You could fit a truck in there if you tried."

Everyone knew to avoid Jungkook's competitive side. If he gets competitive, he'll only be satisfied after destroying you.

They both laughed at Jimin's comment, not seeing where they were going. Jimin bumps into someone sending a wave of static energy in his hand. He turns around to see if they're okay, but the girl didn't stop. Shouting an apology, she went along her way.

Jimin shrugged, ready to move forward when he sees something shiny on the ground. He bends down to pick up the object.

"Do you think it belongs to her?" He asks Jungkook, showing him the shiny piece of jewelry.

Instead of replying, Jungkook grabs his hand, taking him out of the street and towards their car.

Just as the doors to their car close, he asks, "When did you get it? It wasn't there before, right?"

Jimin has no idea what Jungkook is asking about, "What are talking about?" his eyebrows furrowed.

"The mark, Jiminie-hyung!"

Jimin freezes as he looks down at his hand, and sure enough, there it sat in all its glory, a shining star on his ring finger.

Silence fills the car as neither of them utters a word. Jimin is processing the news, lost in his thoughts, while Jungkook gives him time to do so.

After a few minutes, as the former comes to terms with the fact that he had met his soulmate just now, his mind starts running at full speed. Who could it be? How is he going to find them? Busan is a big city; he can't just go around knocking at every door asking to touch people.

As he starts to get frantic, he feels a hand on his own. He looks up at the youngest member. Even without words, the younger has made Jimin's heart calm down a little.

Jimin closes his eyes as he sighs. A breath of relief escapes his lips. Even if it's just been three years for him, seeing his older members, he didn't have much hope, which changed when Jin got his mark. What a coincidence, they both get their marks just a week apart.

His eyes open as he remembers the locket he is still holding. Could it be the girl that he just bumped in? I mean, sure, their hands did brush for a second. It's clear that the mark wasn't there before, so it must have been at the market only. And he didn't come in contact with anyone else before that.

His thoughts are interrupted by the voice coming from beside him, "Hyung? Does your mark look like Jin Hyung's to you?" he frowns, looking back at his mark. Now that he sees it, it does resemble their Hyung nim's a little.

"Should we ask him to send a picture?" he suggests. Jungkook takes his phone out to do so right away.

They text Jin, wanting to see if their suspicion was correct. They wait for a few minutes before Jin's reply comes.

Both the members stare at the picture and Jimin's mark, trying to see even a hint of difference but failed. The realization of both; Jin and Jimin being soulmates of the same girl sets down heavily in their hearts. What game was fate playing?

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Annyeonghaseyo, Babies.

Here's a treat for you. A longer chapter. This is the longest I've written yet. Thank you all for your support. 

Also, Buckle up. The rides gonna get crazier.

Borahae!

#bts #bts fic #BTS Drama #bts angst #BTS jimin #BTS jin #bts army #bts romance #btsrm #bts jhope #bts jungkook #bts suga #bts fluff #bts taehyung #kim taehyung #jeon jeongkook #jimin #min yoongi #jung hoseok #kim namjoon #kim seokjin #bts ot7 #original character #bts jimin #bts jin #bts namjoon #bts v #bts fanfic #btswritersclub #btswritingcafe

[icharchivist]

icha!! I finished awakening moon :) it was very good and i can see why u love chikage! I have two BURNING questions up top though.

1. do we ever learn what the exact job of the organization is. I guessed espionage/assassin/various shady business before even starting this act so personally i’m very very happy i got there at least. hmph. I’m pretty good. but do we ever learn more about… actual job details?

and 2. do we ever get a real explanation for chikage’s “I don’t like women” line. it’s so abrupt that it’s funny but also this is the one information my sister has about chikage and it’s not easy to defend against lmaoooo. I don’t for a second believe chikage’s story abt his mother is the right one because first… if that is real it’s a bullshit excuse. like hello dude. have u ever talked to One More Woman than ur mother. izumi can’t be that special. i feel like that isn’t supposed to be totally untrue since he like… shoves izumi away after making sure she doesn’t get run over that one time? but my working theory is that izumi startled him so badly that one time he was like “i have to make sure she never touches me again” and decided the best way to do that was… whatever he said. and then he keeps being standoffish to izumi when they’re alone bc he’s already gone past the point of no return so may as well just drop the pleasant act. that line is so wild to me though because like really apart from that he is pretty normal around izumi. like. what’s going on here it’s going to haunt me.

ok now onto the chronological stuff… this is a lot more chapters, so I’ll be quicker, and anyways I feel like i set up my initial feelings and thoughts pretty well in the last ask so i don’t need to say too much stuff. anyways i feel like here a whole lotta stuff Happens but it was mostly playing out things i’d expected to happen for the most part? but i might also jump around time a little bit because of that…

anyways when they were practicing that thunder scene I was thinking that he sounded as easygoing as always. so it was nice to hear izumi back me up on that one. you're correct the voice acting here is really wonderful. wataru hatano you're amazing! and well. i mean. listen. shaiapouf as a character Is. a Character but the voice acting for him is pitch-perfect so yeah. skill. i felt like chikage goes through a Lot this arc but seriously, the voice acting for him throughout just like, consistently impressed me.

izumi’s thinking to herself he isn't good at showing emotion bc he just sounds shallow and empty. wow u really did not hold back there. i've been thinking this for a while but i want to throw homare at chikage. it would be fun for soooo many reasons. like chikage has to contend with how homare is around hisoka and everyone but also the whole homare deal of like “i’m incapable of being a normal human!” i imagine that would strike a chord somewhere. even now that he’s like reconciled with hisoka it would be rather interesting.

love the deeply hassled sigh chikage lets out when izumi asks him to stay back for a moment. I still think its crazy that izumi literally hasn’t said a thing abt how weird he’s being including tsuzuru when he was struggling with his script. also when he dropped that small bottle? My guesses were “dangerous poison serum” and “august memento” and im glad to say i was right on BOTH counts. and the way he goes "If you touched that, I would've never forgiven you." when izumi goes to pick up… chikage is so fun/interesting to me because he’s got this very placid mask for his emotions but the moment that drops he’s soooooo obvious. goes like 0-100. like he does not recover well. i would ask how he survived previous espionage missions etc. but i guess previously he did not have to deal with august and april being dead. But anyways the moment i saw that i was like “hm… hisoka didn’t wash up with it so he probably drank it… did it give him amnesia?” soooooo :) smug smile.

i do like izumi being mad at this whole thing. I mean even up to the end of this event she’s still so confused abt chikage’s women hater thing which. fair. but mostly i really like izumi’s relationship with chikage because it feels like it’s the most antagonistic she’s been towards other troupe members? like when chikage invited her out on that date i audibly said to myself “hell yeah, PvP” and well. he kidnapped her and then she antagonized him by acting out the entirety of the wonderful charlatan of oz (which, love that she knows the entire script by heart).

the spring sleepover, part two! i thought it was nice that like. itaru and banri were gaming together here and it was banri who was like “um… where the fuck is ur roommate.” it reminded me of how itaru would knowingly be like ah. I don’t think u can just skate by in akigumi. like itaru… yes chikage looks like he wants to leave but i think u are being a little. unwelcoming. tsk tsk. glad tsuzuru and the rest of harugumi react appropriately. sakuya’s "chikage always looks at me when we're acting together, but it feels like... he's not actually SEEING me, you know?" was sooo insightful. thinking about how yuzo said sakuya has that stupid innocent part of rick down pat. i've got to think. that's probably the only part of him that chikage knows too, huh… but obviously sakuya (and rick) are more than that! the “it feels like he's acting opposite to a doll instead of a person” line really makes me want to sit down with chikage and be like. oh my god. I mean i know the organization u work for is for sure illegal but i also think it’s bad for ur mental health.

the moment they decided to prank him by tampering with his food i Knew that chikage was gonna get mad lol. like as an assassin / whatever multi-talented job he has i doubt he’d take kindly to it. and then he laces izumi’s food later. lol.

hisoka going “I’m scared to fall asleep” made me really worry… but his flashback scene was so fun to watch. I don’t have much to say abt it since we get the full explanation of that last scene with august later, but i am confused about them mastering japanese…? like, my assumption has always been that they were natively japanese since um… i feel like. people would point that out otherwise right. and it wouldn’t make sense for their names to be japanese otherwise either… maybe they are and were just like. out on the streets in a foreign country u probably wouldn’t learn japanese, huh… or is it just like. anime logic.

anyways izumi got kidnapped that was so fun. quoting from my notes when i realized it was gonna happen “oh he's totally kidnapping izumi. this is the best possible outcome actually. i wanted to see them fight.” I was confused as to why chikage was getting seen by Literally Everyone bc it’s like. didnt u research their schedules. but then i realized it was on purpose lol. I really liked that izumi figured out the chika-usa thing, like, immediately! and started gushing about it lol. it was nice to see chikage open up a bit. and then she quoted august which i’m sure was sweet and not at all doing irreparable damage to chikage’s psyche. well rip to her for a while. i do think it is sooo funny how muku is like maybe they ran off and eloped! same vibes as juza seeing sakyo and his mom and thinking theyre together. i’d say its a sakisaka/hyodo thing but no. i think like at least 50% of the troupe is just like that.

chikage never being able to sleep unless he’s like totally alone because he can’t feel safe otherwise is… sad. also its such a fun contrast to hisoka! i have been thinking abt this a lot actually bc like both these characters have their own sleep quirks and also this episode is called awakening moon? which i think is obviously like. that bright moon over august’s death… but it’s also like, an awakening, which i think suggests like, the recovery of hisoka’s memories as well as chikage’s awakening to like… the truth of that night and that hisoka hadn’t betrayed them at all… but i think it’s such a fun word because like some of the most important breakthroughs in this episode don’t center on waking up at all. in fact they hinge upon the opposite: sleep! hisoka sleeping to remember and chikage sleeping around sakuya… speaking of that scene where hisoka sleeps, winter is SO SWEET throughout this entire episode. like genuinely every time they show up they’re so sweet. the way homare says he’ll keep a lookout and pay hisoka back for mmmbm! and the way later when hisokas like i have to do something. on my own. all of winter troupe comes to him and is like hey i noticed ur sleeping less… can we share ur burdens? and the way tasuku catches him when he immediately falls asleep. so good. also azuma SPECIFICALLY being the one to wish him sweet dreams! considering… everything, surrounding azuma’s own troubles with sleep and the whole good night sweet dreams from nocturnality… that got me.

december 2nd being the night before they did their plan makes me think like??? is Hisoka’s bday literally just the day he lost his memories? what a day. like did he pick that as his bday after losing his memories or was that. but goddd. what a day. love chikage and izumi in that hideout room like izumi really went “I’m gonna annoy u through my acting. fuck you.” until hisoka showed up. him doing the whole putting himself in someone else’s shoes with chikage… inspired by homare… that made me clutch my heart. especially with homares line of “you will be fine. I am sure you will know what to do” like the SURETY in that!! now I’m very glad hisoka didn’t end up drinking the amnesia serum bc chikage’s shout of “don’t!” was so distressed like wow. this is the last piece of his family he has left. but OH MY GOD. could u imagine the alternate universe where chikage did not stop him and hisoka drank that potion. and winter loved him again and again and again. like my god the drama there. also chikage seems like he would spiral so incredibly deeply because of it and it would be incredibly angsty but also it would be so interesting. I do no think a3 has the time for that since they have like, plays to do and can’t properly pull that off and make it sincere with the proper amt of time but oh my god could u imagine… on the other hand I think chikage has so much love for his family of august and april that he would never have let hisoka drink it.

I love how when they get back though izumi decides that she can totally just LIE to a troupe of ACTORS when she’s proven she’s not that good at acting… it’s good hisoka backs her up or stuff would’ve gotten crazy… I hope ppl do get to know more of the truth eventually not because I want people to be mad at chikage. mostly because I want to know the full details of his job already and bc I think it’d be nice if he had more than like One Person to share his thoughts with. it’s good he does have the one, though. and I love spring troupe reaffirming that they’re family! that rly carried throughout the whole of awakening moon, it was so good.

chikage trying to leave was one of my favorite bits of awakening moon! like itaru u are SO funny. first its like "hi chikage :) u are the best roommate i couldve asked for" (and i think he calls him sempai?? wild) and then the moment chikage leaves he calls up sakuya. pfft. he knows what he’s doing. and then sakuya!!! I KNEW that coin toss was gonna come back and I KNEW sakuya was gonna get it right The Once!! and see through his lie! and right when chikage was abt to leave!! play parallels secured hehe. also sakuya’s "isn't there anything we can do for you? isn't there anything we can do to help?" the hisoka&winter parallels! I loved how sakuya was just like. u and me. sleep on the stage. like wow… I laughed at tenma for naively going “let’s all sleep together!” as the solution for summer troupe but like clearly this technique is working well for harugumi. chikage going "I... can't be your family. I betrayed you. I don't have the right." though… my god. I have to think this is very telling in terms of how he perceived hisoka, too, in that after his betrayal he was no longer allowed to be part of chikage’s “family”—but he still tells tsuzuru he has 2 siblings, in that conversation he has with him, so I assume he was really struggling with how to feel about hisoka—as far as chikage knew, hisoka had betrayed them, but he was also the Only Family chikage had left… that’s wild. it was cute to see sakuya recount spring’s first three plays but very strange to see sakuya talk abt clockwork heart, unknowing of the entire mizuno situation. I mean, it makes sense he wouldn’t know it well, but it’s still wild to me. I also like how chikage’s sprite isn’t wearing glasses here! also when he said "When I'm playing Oswald, it's like I'm drowning in all his emotions, too. It's suffocating." I was like ah. tsuzuru did his job well, then. for real that play sure did work well on improving chikage huh.

sakuya phrasing his relative situation in terms of like. him as the audience and everyone else on stage is such an apt and compelling comparison! and then chikage and sakuya sleeping together and then the whole of harugumi piling in… that cg was SO CUTE. everyone’s just so adorable there! sakuyas expression! citron sprawled on top of them! everything!

as for the play performance, I’m glad closing night went well! the costumes for this play are sooo good. I’ve been thinking abt itaru and citrons in particular like hello? hello? yuki great job. although I wonder why masumi is wearing just like a regular fucking jacket under his scarf deal. he doesn’t look that magic to me. gosh I imagine the prop work for this play would be insane tho like. how’d they deal with the hot air balloon and stuff. and the magic. I also listened to the corresponding song and liked it a lot! for some reason it reminded me of gusty garden galaxy, like the mario music? oh and hisoka almost calling chikage april and then the teasing lilt in hisokas voice when he says "chikage, they're calling you an ape" that was so cute. but also like cmon guys. chikage's birthday is Right There. that could be such a normal nickname. I also loved homare’s et tu, tasuku?! line. that was so funny

I loved that tenma sincerely did not realize chikage kidnapped izumi. and then he, taichi and sakuya all totally believed chikage’s lie. which I did not fall for even a bit. tsumugi going "I'm glad all the loose ends have been tied" though made me sit there though like okay what the fuck does the Organization do tho. huh. that’s a pretty loose end. also does chikage really hate women. they haven’t touched that as of this line. but then hisoka saying he wants to tell winter his memories even tho it could be selfish! so sweet! and loved how tsumugi and azuma are both traditionally supportive while tasuku and homare are like you're worried about being selfish NOW? i love you that way anyways.

and THEN the last cg with chikage and hisoka reminiscing. that scene was. oh my godddd. the way u can like Hear chikage going from fond reminiscing to having his voice break down into crying… it’s soooo good. and his sad smile!! and the moon!! I’m so glad these two were able to find each other and reconciled really… the only reason I didn’t cry was bc hisoka said that family was "inseperatable and irreplacable" and I had this moment of “oh. citroncore” bc I’m like 99% sure that inseperatable is not a real word and hisoka meant inseparable instead. I’m taking it as a sign that he did not 100% master Japanese even tho it’s definitely just a super minor localization error/typo. and then chikage helping izumi wash dishes in the morning :) like I said before I like that these two r a little hostile to each other like.

chikage: you're shamelessly optimistic

izumi: why thank you.

chikage: that wasn't a compliment

that exchange was so fun. like wow okay. I also liked how izumi was like hm. let’s throw chikage into opening night. I’m sure he’ll feel frustrated by how he doesn’t measure up and just Lets That Happen. I think it’s a sort of fun difference since she’s usually pretty gentle and sweet to people. not that she isn’t to chikage! she definitely is I mean he kidnapped her and she was worried abt his sleep schedule. but I think she like is more challenging towards him and that’s a rly fun dynamic. and then chikage making up a lie to justify his women hating. I’ve already explained my confusion on this so I’m just gonna conclude with ITS KUMON AND HE WANTS TO JOIN AKIGUMI!!!!! WHOOO!!!!!!! I’m SO hype for that like. I feel we’ll get some fun juza (and possibly banri?) bits that way… I actually have heard a bit abt kumon in that I feel like I’ve read smthing abt him having a kind of weak body? so we shall see about that but I’ve got a feeling that may be the reason he’s unable to join akigumi—since that’s an action-based troupe and all… I’m very excited since it seems like he hadn’t even thought abt joining summer troupe initially!! also I am so excited to see summer in full force again. hands clasped in prayer tenma & juza main story interactions? my secondary color trio? I don’t think that’ll actually happen but 1) I can dream and 2) I can write abt it. lol. I would also love to know the flower meanings of what chikage sends to hisoka pre act 2!!!

HELLOOO FRIEND OMG! so quick to finish it!! congratulation!!!

AND DLKJFDL GLAD TO SEE THEN IT ALL MAKES SENSE. Chikage. Good.

For the two questions.

Pretty sure the implication is espionage/spy works with various level of shady involved. In the EN server we get a little more glimpse into what Chikage does in particular, other than that i think in the JPN server there's been various events just talking more in depth about the Organization and their involvement in it.

Okay so I'm on a whole different level on it because i legit heard his story about his mom and went "yeah makes sense". While he's never that mean to anyone ever, he is deeply uncomfortable around women in general in others backstages especially and i remember a backstage late in the JPN development that mentions it's really a gut feeling and he's trying so hard nowadays to improve on that, and improve on knowing "if Izumi doesn't make me feel this unwell around women then maybe i'll be able to solve this gut reaction i have around women". I think the way he violently pushed Izumi away was definitely to keep her away because he had no reason to play nice with her, and usually he behaves just, normally, but he's really uncomfortable around women still. I would be inclined to believe he didn't tell EVERYTHING regarding his family situation but to me i would assume that something bad happened when he was a child enough to make him think as a defense mechanism "women=bad". To me there's abuse involved. The Organization is hinted to be all male and Chikage is hinted to have been recruited very young, so it's possible that the turn of event is, Chikage had a toxic upbringing and, esp with a child mind, blamed his mother for not protecting him, then he moved in an all male organization and meeting women was so anecdotical until late in his life that this defense mechanism truly got worse since then and now he has a hard time getting rid of it. Personally i can't see his argument fully as bullshit because hhhh i had my mom get me from household to household by getting in relationship with abusive men who were abusive toward me and my reaction was more to blame my mother for not listening to me and doing as she pleases than to specifically get mad at those guys, so, the whole reasoning Chikage is saying in this part (if we take it as a truth) to me makes sense. It's not fair nor reasonable but trauma, especially experienced as a child, rarely is.

On a more practical level, i think it's just meant to be a romance trope lol. While a3 is more found family focused a lot of backstages, esp SSR ones, and every 3rd mini chat, involves the characters flirting with Izumi (as a self insert more than a character), not to mention it happens as well on homepage's lines for like, vday or bday and stuff. And Chikage is definitely built around the trope of "he can't stand women (for traumatic reasons) but he makes an exception for you/you make him feel safer/he's willing to grow past his trauma as you make it easier for him.". It's pretty cheesy and i do dislike that it's the trope he was plagued with but that's kind of the reasoning. So yes Izumi "can be that special", that's the trope ahah.

but yeah no personally i'm team he must have had a deep trauma and at best he says the truth and it's only because he felt abandonned when he needed help by a parent, and at worse, something much worse happened for him to be this uncomfortable with being touched by women (because he generally handles conversation with women just fine, like, he treats women pretty normally, and it's when they get touchy or invade his personal space that he gets visibly uncomfortable. and even there he never gets physical in reclaiming his bondaries, he generally lies his way out in a pleasant way, it's really only with Izumi in the intro chap that he is this violent. When he really told off Izumi it was to make sure she kept her distances and else it's really only when they got physical that his reactions were a little more pushed, in general he handles being around her like a normal person. He was mostly violent because he didn't want to play nice with Hisoka's found family, in any other circumstances he takes upon himself.). And that's kind of a horrifying thought DLKFJDF the cause of the behavior was never extended on though.

On another note he does work on it a lot and came to acknowledge that he can't just let his trauma response get in the way of his life and interractions with 50% of the society, and he's been working on getting less uncomfortable around women. but yeah it's not "hate women" in a misogynist way sorta, it's really just, yeah.

anyway back to the chapter,

DLKFJDLFK RIGHT Wacchan is incredible, truly has a Voice Range. He really has such a nice voiiice and it helps building Chikage as a character so much i love it so much.

Izumi literally doesn't hold back against prick i love that for her <3 I find his acting really interesting as to inform us on his character, and you're right, i feel like Homare would be a good person to lock him with. (Hisoka's next evil plan i'm sure. Now that they're reconsiliated he can be evil on purpose like a little brother <3). I feel like the difference is that Homare is just like that while Chikage is probably just… something he forced himself to be so much it became as natural as breathing, as a spy and everything, and that's why once Mankai pried him open like an oysters he had a really hard time sorting it all out. Like what do you MEAN his mask doesn't protect him anymore. And i think having Homare being all nodding about the lack of human emotions esp now that the dam has been broken would just have Chikage stares into oblivion like, this is my life now.

GOD YEAH about his mask. IT's so fucking cool. It's really just, as long as he can act detached and pleasant he handles everything just fine but the moment things go awry he's struggling a lot more with his emotions and i just muah But yeah you're right, for the intense reaction to the potion i do think it's a mix of still grieving August so much that anyone touching a memento of him would be like fingers in his gapping wounds, and the fact Izumi is the person that "took Hisoka way from him" with the whole theater, or, at least, so heavily linked to how Hisoka "moved on", he especially becomes more irrational with that. Since at this point he still blames Hisoka for August's death, it's having an extention of Hisoka taking the last bit of August he still has away from him. And thus, irrational behavior. Basically yeah i think he handled spying much better in term of lying and all ahah but at the moment he's still grieving and handling it in the poorest, least healthy way, that anything that ends up touching the grief itself makes him act irrational.

you really got it all figured as you read ahah i'm amazed!!!! congratz!

I do love Izumi's behavior on it. While a lot of the others actors have been prick in their own way, they at least contained it at throwing it at each other and never at Izumi. She never really had to deal with any of them being antagonistic toward her and it was interesting to see her dynamic with Chikage when Chikage basically decided to be A Menace. And I love that she's allowed to be angry and frustrated about being treated like that and how much she had to handle when Chikage became even More Of A Menace.

Spring sleepover. Always good. I do love that Banri was able to see it too and like, Banri&Itaru, the duo of "tried to leave the Mankai company" being both "huh. your roommate isn't really trying to stay in the company. That's bad.". Meanwhile yeah, remember how in the Autumn Chapter when Banri is about to leave Sakyo tells him "you can leave but don't think you'll be allowed to come back" and Banri leaves anyway and he has to beg Sakyo to come back? Like i feel like Banri was really MHMMMMMMMMMMMMM WE DONT DO THAT HERE. I ADORE Sakura's comment though, yes. It was so insightful and Sakuya is so perceptive i love him so much. Sweet son. Yuzo's comment is so funny god. yeaaaahh agreed on the comment for Chikage, the org cannot be healthy. Like, man. This is not a healthy way to live his life.

I didn't even notice the parallelism between Spring putting thing in his food VS him putting stuff in Izumi's food LMAOOOOO, payback in the worst way possible (assassin style). I loved to see Spring do something that stupid. They want to bond with him so bad!!! but he's still A Menace so this was the worst plan they had in a long while.

Oh Hisoka not being native Japanese was pointed out actually? in the Winter chapter during the spy arc, Homare mentions that Hisoka indeed sounds shady as a "foreigner no one knows the origin of". in the anime i know they took it one step further with the spy confronting Hisoka and saying "it's true you entered this country illegally and are laying low in this theater company to escape crimes?". Hisoka and Chikage are definitely implied to not be Japanese. They can still be East Asian so people wouldn't pick it up as easily, but they're not Japanese. (there was a lot of talk back in the days about the possibility of Hisoka being Russian, both because of the descriptions of intense Winter from his youth and because he is compared to a Russian Short Hair Cat in the Christmas play. Do of that as you will.) And "Hisoka" and "Chikage" are not their birthname either, they're codenames August gave them for the mission. The only reason Hisoka remembers it as his name is that since it was a name given by August, it was the only time he was given a name out of love, and as such, he held on to this name. But it's also why Hisoka and Chikage's name have the meaning they have. Hisoka's is "Secretly" and Mikage involves "shadow" in its imagery, similarly for "Chikage", and "Utsuki", Chikage's last name, is a way to say "April". August didn't really think too far about all of this lmao. That's one of the reasons i mentioned the organization to be International in a previous ask tbh. And yeah they both learnt Japanese for the job, but it's implied they both speak a lot of others languages. Chikage says it a little more obviously (and he talks about "flying aboard for work" a lot) and for Hisoka we know he's very good at English as well. Hisoka fearing falling asleep though is so :(((.

"THIS IS THE BEST POSSIBLE OUTCOME ACTUALLY" LMAOOOOOOOO You're right. yes. But yes Chikage is just shady on purpose, he's so stupid i love that about a man. But yess i love how Izumi figured out the Chika-usa thing right away. It was really her moment of "Chikage redemption arc". And then he kidnapped her and it was just, ah. but yes it was so nice to see Chikage open up and Chikage getting some emotional and psychological warfare from Izumi reminding him of August.

yeah no it's a 50% of the troupe is like that. TO BE FAIR TO THEM THOUGH. THIS IS NICHE KNOWLEDGE BUT I NEED TO SHARE. But in Azuma's birthday SSR that came out like, a month before Chikage's intro chapter, Azuma…… kidnaps Izumi to a resort island with him and then specifically sends texts to the Mankai company to say "heheh we're on a date" and then leave them on read and take Izumi's phone when Masumi and Sakyo start to send death threat. Of course it's, not the same kind of kidnapping, Izumi was mostly conscenting to joining Azuma but didn't expect the trip and didn't expect they'd stay up the night, but MY POINT IS that IN RECENT MEMORY they had Azuma and Izumi "eloping" and leaving everyone on read because Azuma is a MENACE. So IN THEIR DEFENSE i think they have reasons to jump to the wildest conclusions since they can at least go "well. It did happen once." and then look at Azuma with a look of reproach while he's just 😇

yeah Chikage not being able to sleep is sad :( it is indeed a fantastic contrast with Hisoka yeah. For the record the official nickname for April/December/August is "Gekkagumi" because "Gekka" means both "month" and "moon" ("gumi" is troupe). In Chikage's song he talks about being alone under the shadow of the moon and the word he uses for that is especially "Gekka". (he also talks about "tears falling in secret" and the term for "in secret" there is "Hisoka", which also would express how his emotions and vulnerability is something he can only afford with Hisoka,at this point at least.) I think this is also the tongue-and-cheek reason why the Moon is such an important illustration for those two, since it's a wordplay on the fact months and moon is the same thing. Which therefore adds further to how their own sleeping cycle add to it yes. I really love how much Hisoka and Chikage are built as foil to one another. Even on their designs! Like, Chikage has green hair and clear eyes, Hisoka has white hair and green eyes. Their hair part in the opposite direction to one another, like it's mirrored. And i don't remember where it's mentioned but the state of Hisoka's hidden eye is a secret and it's not impossible that it's because he's blind from this eye, VS Chikage wearing fake glasses (he doesn't need them) giving an illusion of perfect vision. With the irony, of course, that it was Chikage who was blind to the truth. and ofc Sugar VS Spice and their general personality and, of course, their sleep patern.

But yes in Sleeping we trust. I think it's such a sweet way to show that Hisoka's "quirk" which Chikage mostly frowned upon, ended up being both of their salvation and the indication that they can both lay down and rest. Chikage being kept awake is a shown of his lack of trust and amount of things to work on which shows the toxic hold the Organization has on him, and as such, Sleeping is instead associated with the safety of being able to rest around people who are here for you. It's really such a nice thematic they work on here.

WINTER IS SO SO SWEET I COULDNT STOP CRYING. Literally the whole scene about how "just how heavy is that sin you bear?" "perhaps it's heavy enough for the five of us to carry together" IN TEAAAARS IN TEARS IN TEARS LOVE IS REAL LOVE IS IN FUYU im fine im fine BUT YOU GET ME. They're all here for him in their own way and it really showcase their arc so far too. From Homare learning to read his emotions, Tsumugi ready to be here to carry his troupe with confidence, Tasuku being there physically to do that, and Azuma helping him find solace in his sleep… It's just. God Winter is so well written. The payup to their arc was so good.

Hisoka losing his memories on his bday is so sad goodness. BUT GODD YEAH. YEAH THIS WHOLE BIT. YEAH. Between Hisoka going to confront Chikage and just, knowing Homare had supported him this whole time, and this surety like you said!! god i love Fuyu i love Fuyu i love- I love Chikage's reaction to it all god. Like, i think he convinced himself he wanted to destroy December because it was the normal thing to want right? He thought Hisoka killed August, and faked his death, he blamed Hisoka for the distress he was in, and so, he put all of his distress and turned it into rage and revenge to carry on. But he never actually wanted harm on Hisoka and it's only when harm almost happened that he realized that. So blinded by revenge he was about to destroy the one thing he should have been happy to still have. His pure despair when everything sinks in and especially that Hisoka did nothing wrong is just. Everything to me. Like seriously i wasn't too hot on Chikage at first because i was so pissed at how he was treating Hisoka, but the moment the line "what do i do now…. in the end the one who was betrayed by his own family… was you by my own hand" was uttered i did a 180° and was just oh okay i would die for Chikage actually. Thanks for your time. Just the absolute devastation of realizing he was becoming the monster he had seeked to destroy, and turned the destruction he felt was righteous as a way to cope against the only person he never actually wanted to harm? God this is good angst. This is SUCh an interesting character bit. (his chara song also kinda confirms it, "rather than fooling others, i'm better at fooling myself" i'm putting my fist in my mouth)

BUT YEAH GOD the alternative universe where Chikage was just a little too late and Hisoka had drank the potion is just. GOD. Winter would love him all over again, they'd be here every step of the way, and Chikage would probably be spiral so damn much because of the guilt. I see why a3 didn't do it, like you say, but holy shit what an amazing angst fuel this idea is. but yes, agreed, Chikage loves his family too much to let it happen. Everything he wanted about Hisoka's destruction was just his grief lashing out and was never something he actually meant.

i think it's actually a good time to mention the flowers Chikage sent? the first bouquet he sent were Marigolds. They represent "Jealousy, despair, grief" in the Japanese flower language. (in other flower languages it can also means happiness, joy and good luck, but it depends how much Chikage knew that) There's a clear mix there, but to me it seems Chikage was basically sending his anguish to Hisoka. His Jealousy that Hisoka could move on (or how close Hisoka and August used to be), the despair he's been into ever since they both left, this grief. But also perhaps a part of him was wishing him happiness, joy and good luck. The second bouquet was of Zinnias. Zinnias, in the Japanese Flower Language, means "thoughts of absent friends, I mourn your absence". This one is far more explicit. Could it be about August? Of course, but i don't think so. I think it was a way for Chikage to call for help. He was genuinely mourning BOTH of them. He also lost Hisoka himself, in his mind. He saw Hisoka bloom on stage and befriend more people, and he lost him, he was no longer part of his life. No matter how they were before, Chikage loves Hisoka dearly and he still lost him.

(and i mean it for the call for help, do listen to his song: he keeps calling for help in it. Song is set before the conclusion of Awakening Moon so it's still his revenge self singing.)

So yeah it's just. a lot. I love them a lot.

LKDFJLKDF Izumi lying to everyone sure was funny. She tried. Thank you Hisoka for the back up. But yes i'd love more people to get to know about Chikage's background at least. And yes!! Spring is a family! and that includes Chikage, who lost his family, who was about to destroy the family he had left, being forcefully adopted into his own new family. fun fact! the flower associated with Chikage is the lilly of the valley, which means "return to happiness". It fits doesn't it? He lost his family but now he can have a new one. He can return to being happy….

yeah Itaru calls him Senpai, he's very cheeky about it. Itaru facing him was indeed so funny and i do love the whole thing keeping in mind Itaru almost left the company, it really was "okay time to unleash our secret "stay in Mankai" weapon. Sakuyaaaaa we need yoouuuuuu". AND THEN SAKUYA!!!! YEAH WHEN YOU FIGURED OUT FOR THE COIN TOSS I WAS EHEHEHEHEH!!! Sleeping together sure works super well for Harugumi. It's really so funny. And god yeah it sure tells a lot about how he saw Hisoka doesn't it…. man those guys. I think it's also that, just… Hisoka has been his sibling for a huge chunk of their lives when Hisoka betrayed him. Like i mentioned i think a part of him knew all along and he was fooling himself, that he still cared too much for Hisoka to turn this betrayal around. It was still his brother, no matter the amount of pain they went through. But Spring is a new family, Spring is barely getting to know him, and it's not fair that he would join this family while he only ever joined to hurt them and betray them. And also, to be fair, at this point Chikage flipped the script around as well in term of who betrayed who. He sees himself as the one who betrayed Hisoka for being unable to listen to the truth. I think it's also a case of Chikage holding himself to another standard. It's okay if his brother betrays him. That's his little brother, of course he can accept it. But it isn't okay that Chikage betrayed him, and everyone else who tried to be a family with him. Like Chikage is taking the blunt of his actions more brutally. And i think it can reflect on the idea of Chikage mostly taking it all upon himself, that he's the one who has to manage and know not to hurt others. If he says the truth about his living condition with his mom and step dad, it could be indicative on how stuff happened there, but because of what i said earlier, i'll leave it at that.

It was nice to see them discuss the Spring troupe's play but what i love about it is that, Chikage replies about it in awe on some levels? like "what Clockwork Heart wasn't finished until the very last day? could never have guessed", it means that, he didn't just come to see the Winter troupe plays. Probably because it was easier to hide his attention from Itaru by taking tickets for all the plays, or at least also Itaru's, and also perhaps to collect information on everyone. But it also feels like he got to care about those plays still enough that he's surprised by all of this. Like esp Clockwork which is also a story about grief to an extend. Knowing to lock away something to bring both of you peace until the System stops hunting you down and all. Considering Chikage threatens Hisoka telling him that if the Organization learnt he was alive, they'd destroy everything Hisoka cared for, i wonder if he could project there. Learning to lock away the knowledge that the one he cares for is still alive because the "system" isn't ready for it yaknow? But yes it's weird to see mention of Clockwork without talking about Mizuno, so wild.

Speaking of plays and the way Chikage must have felt watching them: i mentioned how i think seeing Hisoka playing characters uncaring about death/assuring that avoiding death isn't an option, probably messed Chikage up in that level of grief he was into. But i need to remind that MMMBM is a story where Hisoka investigate a murder that happened between siblings, with one of them seemingly "betraying" the other, only then to learn that the death was a mean to free them from the prison that was the obligation the sibling was tied to. I don't think Chikage would have been fully receptive to the whole plot other than "sibling kills siblings" that could have fired him up, but the whole scope of it is so daunting.

Anyway back to the scene itself, i also really like Chikage's sprite here, he looks so nice. AND HELPP. Tsuzuru's thearpy session via Theater winning once again.

i loved to see Sakuya express all of this, it's so good. AND THE HARUGUMI ILLUSTRATION IS SO GOOD. THEY'RE ALL SO CUTE. cat behavior. And the fact that despite all of them piling in, Chikage didn't wake up. That all of them makes him feel safe enough that he can sleep with all of them!! and the way all of them nuzzle next to them. also Tsuzuru's "oh well if you can't beat them." before joining them is so cute to me, the one person who could have opposed to it went, yknow what, fuck it, nap time with the family. They're all so adorable i love this CG so much.

the play was SOOO GOOD. the costumes were all amazing, indeed they all look so nice. Masumi probably was such a lazy wizard the laziness carried to the design ahah. The effects must be incredible yes, it must be a blast to see. I want to see it so bad!! and especially i love Citron's voice acting? like man it really shows how much he improved with Japanese he's so good. and omg for the music. I can imagine yes. Fun fact on the Blooming Live stage what they did for the hot air balloon was that they had a plateform that could move in the crowd in which they sang many songs (a lot of the group songs, but also Captain Sky's pirate song with the platform looking like a pirate ship), and they had a hot air balloon's prop attached to it, it looked SOOOOO cool. I doubt a3 in universe could do that but i still think about it so fondly.

Hisoka teasing Chikage is EVERYTHING, i love it so much. I wonder how everyone sees it now like, Hisoka was clearly distant with Chikage at first, sometimes downright distressed, and now he's there teasing the fuck out of him in pure little sibling behavior. i love them so much. And Homare is always so funny god.

HELPPP the trio of Guillible Kids. to be fair Tenma is going to fall for Chikage's lies a lot. There's a minichat later about how Chikage/Itaru/Citron all team up to lie to Tenma and Tenma is genuinely "i didn't think it was true but the three of them says it is so it must be right???" like. baby. Who allowed them together they're a menace. AND HELPPP. Tsumugi just knows of the loose ends at the company!! as for the Org well. Well! That's a problem for future them! BUT YESS WINTER'S REACTION IS SO MUCH. I love Hisoka worrying, Tsumu and Azuma reassuring him, and Tasuku and Homare teasingly roasting him. They're my troupe i love them so much……….

And the CG is SO GOOD i love the amount of emotions these two show there it's guuuh :(((((. BUT HELP FOR THE TYPO. i'm sure it's a typo but i'm taking the HC of Hisoka stumbling on Japanese as well, because why not, that's so funny.

and yess the hostility between Izumi and Chikage is so funny. they really have a neat dynamic, i love it very much.

One last thing about Chikage i don't know where to put but, Izumi jokes about how Chikage can now help them carrying Hisoka around and Chikage goes dark like "i did that all my life i'm not doing this again" < he says while lying because of course he would do it again, it's Hisoka.

and funnily enough, the very first time Chikage appears in the whole story is when Winter is doing a street act and right after it, Hisoka falls asleep and Tasuku catches him, and it's right when Izumi thinks THIS that Chikage slides into the screen:

IT'S SO SPECIAL TO ME LIKE. Hisoka's own personal taxi forshadowing. But also possibly Chikage seeing Tasuku taking care of Hisoka the way Chikage used to take care of him and having a hard time with the fact that he has to see his little brother, whom he was mourning, having easily replaced him.

(also also also pleaaase read Chikage and Hisoka's Coin talk. They're so freaking cute.)

ok now we can close the book on Chikage, now,

AND KUMOOOOOOOOOOON!!!!! it's going to be fun, how could it not be! I'm of course not saying anything but Kumon's plot is really neat so i hope you'll enjoy it! I hope if it doesn't give you Tenma&Juza content it gives you some fuel to imagine more Tenma&Juza content, this is the best we can hope for!

And for the flowers i shared them earlier when it made sense to share them eheheh :3c but yeah, here's a trip!

Congratulation on knowing more about Chikage!!! Here you go, here you know him, my Menace of a man. God what a good chapter.

Hope you have fun with the others chapters and i'm still looking forward to see your reactions :3c take care!

#ichareply #ichafantalks a3 #long post for ts #aranarumei

[n7punk]

btw i’m hoping to start posting isohm tomorrow or the day after. even knowing a lot about worldbuilding and having my rough outline for the fic, there was a lot of writing, rewriting, and editing in the first chapter as i felt the characters out and changed things to better influence them into the personalities they are from the show (and that i wanted them to be).

yesterday i finally reached the point where i was happy with where they were so i’m working on chapter 2 now, and once its rough draft is done i’ll do my final edit of chapter 1 and post it!

the current outline has it at 10-11 chapters, but it could be that plus or minus 2 to be honest. just use that as a rough idea of how long the fic is going to be.

#isohm #ficmeta #fic rambling #this is the longest gap between one project ending and the next fic/chapter going up i think #its been six days since i finished the ditm edit #so its a full week when my longest gap was like 4 or 5 days #(since i started my regular posting last july) #buuuut ive had so many health issues lately and also i just want to take the time to make it Right #im really loving chapter 1 now and i really feel like i can keep going and writing!! #cuz before i wrote it and tried to do chapter two before double back and Heavy editing #but chapter 2 was just feeling weird since its supposed to be informed by chapter 1 #anyway i really like it now so yay

[sunlight-moonrise]

Sugar, Spice, and Everything (Not So) Nice (Reid Imagine)

Summary: Being a Barista and falling for a regular is as cliche as it gets. Having that customer become your new professor? Not so much. 

A/N: *Peeks head out* Hello everyone. I have come back from my unannounced hiatus to show off this baby. Major thanks to @definitelynotkatesblog​ and @clean-bands-dirty-stories​ for helping me put this fic together. This was written for the lovely @httpnxtt​ for the secret-fic-swap in the Discord (thanks @imagining-in-the-margins​.) I hope you all enjoy this smutty goodness. 

Category: Smut

Content Warnings: Face Slapping, Degradation, Slight Hair Pulling, Oral Sex (male receiving), Fingering, Spanking, Penetrative Sex, Unprotected Sex/Creampie

Word Count: 6.4K

Masterlist

Being a barista is pretty awesome. Sure, there were bitchy customers and super early mornings but it had it’s redeeming perks. We got free coffee, tea, and snacks during our shifts, which served the caffeine addict in me. I also learned how to make popular lattes, mochas, and frappes that I ended up making at home for myself one too many times. While there were the occasional assholes who couldn’t appear human before getting their hands on some caffeine, there were the regulars who made it worth it. Most of the regulars were so sweet, I appreciated a familiar face when they came in. Some.. more than others.

“He’s baaaaaaaaack,” my coworker Hazel whispered to me in a sing-song voice as she scribbled a customer’s name on a cup. I turned to see who she was talking about, but I already had an inkling about who it was.

My suspicions were correct. I turned to see one of our kindest regulars, my personal favorite customer, Dr. Spencer Reid. Is it weird to know the full name -including the honorific- of a customer? Possibly. But when I’d asked for his name to write on his cup the first time he came in, he accidentally gave me his full name. 

“Dr. Reid- uh, Spencer. Sorry, work habit.” He stuttered, avoiding my eyes after the mistake.

“No worries! What can I get started for you?”

As a Criminology major,  I learned to study the people who catch my attention before indulging them. Call it an old habit. 

Dr. Spencer Reid had earned his title and then some. He’d joined the FBI at only 22, having six degrees under his belt by the age of 27. He’d written several dissertations and co-wrote novels with his colleague, David Rossi. Someone with his reputation could be a pompous ass and have a leg to stand on, which is what made his humbled demeanor so much sweeter. He was also incredibly easy on the eyes, which was a nice little bow on top. 

Hazel liked to joke about how we’d make a cute couple but I know she only did it to watch me get flustered.  

I walked towards the counter to take his order, leaving Hazel with the task of refilling the caramel syrup. I’m always the one to help him since he very aptly pointed out that I’m the only one who makes his coffee just how he likes it.  

Some days, he’d let me surprise him with a random creation. I’d confirm if he wanted caffeine (he always did), iced or not, and any flavor requests. He’d take his drink, tip me handsomely and let me know his thoughts on the drink the next time he came in. So far, his favorite was the almond milk honey latte I’d concocted. It was nice to have a little bit of fun, especially with regulars who were as consistent as him.

“Hey Doc, what can I get ya’?” I asked.

“The usual, please,” he said with a smile. I nodded and set off to make his drink: a venti dark roast with a shit ton of sugar, a dash of nutmeg, and a tiny bit of cinnamon.

“Of course!” I quickly go to fill his order, making sure to put a complimentary treat in a bag for him. I know he had the ultimate sweet tooth so I try to sneak him a confection whenever I can. At first, he was a bit reluctant to take the free pastries, but nowadays he usually smiles when he sees the small bag. 

“Here ya’ go.” I handed him his steamy cup of caffeine along with the little treat, seeing him smile at the small pun I add to his cup, “Have a BREW-tiful day, Doctor!” I watched as his lips landed on the rim of the cup, taking a long sip of the hot coffee. His Adam’s apple bobbed as he swallowed, the sight making my cheeks promptly flush. I cleared my throat before asking, “Is it good?”

“It’s always good when you make it,” he stated matter of factly, a small smile touching his lips. The heat in my cheeks rose again. “Will you be taking a course this summer?” he asked, taking another sip of his coffee.

“Yeah, I’m really looking forward to it. My first day is actually later today. I’m surprised the class section was open, to be honest.” Super surprised actually. I’d been trying to enroll in this class for the past couple of semesters but it was always full by the time I was able to even load the registration page.

“Well, I’ll wish you luck, but I’m sure you won’t need it.”

“How can you be so sure?” 

“I can just tell.” He stated calmly, like it was common knowledge. I raised an eyebrow, waiting for him to explain. Before he could respond, an insistent cough caught both of our attention. I peeked over Spencer’s shoulder to see a customer waiting for his order to be taken. I turned my attention back to the Doctor, an annoyed look painted on my face. He nodded, taking a hint from the impatient mouth breather behind him. 

“Thank you for the coffee. Enjoy the rest of your day. I hope that class goes well.”

“Bye, you too.” I waved, watching as he exited the door. I turned to the waiting customer, a bit miffed that he interrupted our conversation. But because I was at work, I plastered a fake smile on my face so that he wouldn’t see just how annoyed I was. “Welcome, how may I help you?”

●●●

After clocking out at 2:30 PM, I made a dash for the building where my class would be held. It’s not supposed to start for another half-hour, but I wanted to be sure to get there in time to choose a good seat and settle in before the rest of the class arrived.

Luckily room 301 was relatively empty so I was able to score a perfect seat by the window. I decided to kill some time by listening to some music and doodling randomly in my notebook. Some time had passed when I felt someone take the seat next to me. I turned to see a young man occupying the chair beside mine. He looked to be a frat boy based on the Greek letters he was sporting. Who wears a cap and hoodie in this weather? I really hope he didn’t expect to cheat off of me- although these types of guys always seem to do so.

I was about to return to my doodle when I felt a poke on my shoulder. I turned to give the offender my full attention, removing one of the earbuds from my ears. 

“Hey, I’m Tony,” frat boy said, with a wide smile adorning his face. I must admit, his boyish grin melted the slight annoyance I had begun to stir toward him. I returned his greeting and introduced myself as well. “I don’t mean to be a bother,” he continued, “but I like to have at least one buddy in each of my classes. In case we need help or miss an assignment or something.”

I nodded my head - a friend in a class was always useful when it came to studying and swapping notes. We chatted a bit more, learning about each other’s major and why we both decided to take a summer course. Tony is a double major and this course will satisfy the credits he needs for his psychology requirement. This is why you shouldn’t judge a book by its cover. 

It wasn’t until I heard the hush of the classroom that I realized the class was about to begin. I turned back to my notebook, preparing to jot down some important information despite it being the first day of class.

“Good morning class.” Wait. That voice... I didn’t even need to pick my head up to know who had spoken. “This is Criminal Psychology and I am your instructor, Doctor Spencer Reid. Unfortunately, Professor Monroe could not cover this course so I’ll be his permanent replacement. Now…”

I raised my head, watching as he continued to talk about what is to be expected in this course while a TA handed out the syllabus. He went on, able to capture the attention of everyone while speaking of the experiences he had with an array of criminals. His eyes scanned the room and for a brief moment I thought they would land on me, but they continued to take in the mass amount of students before him.

My concentration was broken by Tony passing me a copy of the syllabus. I scanned it over, making sure to highlight all the important dates. I didn’t want any exams or projects conflicting with my work schedule. I also made note of how the overall grade system is broken down. The whole thing seems pretty fair and everything was spaced out enough where I wouldn’t feel too overwhelmed with the workload.

“… and that pretty much wraps it up. Does anyone have any questions?” I tuned in just as he was pulling the first class to a close. No one raised their hands, so he dismissed us with a reminder to read the first chapter of the textbook and to check for any emails.

“So do you want to grab lunch?” Tony asked from beside me. I contemplated whether or not to go with him. He must have seen the hesitation in my face because he quickly added, “Not as a date or anything, I just wanted to grab a bite and I didn’t want to do it alone.”

“Sure,” I smiled, “Let me just ask the professor a quick question about his office hours and I’ll meet you at the food court.”

“Sweet, I’ll see you in a bit.” With that, Tony gathered his stuff and exited the back door. 

I focused my attention on the podium, seeing a gaggle of girls surrounding him asking redundant questions. From what I could hear, their questions could have been answered if they’d read the syllabus. I decided to give them the benefit of the doubt, they were probably more focused on him rather than what he was saying during class. I waited a few more minutes for them to finish up before I made my way to him.

“So do I call you Doctor or Professor now?” I laughed. 

“From you, I’d respond to either,” he replied warmly. The comment made me blush. If he looked into my eyes at that moment, he’d see more stars in them than the night sky. I bit my lip to stop the idiotic grin from spreading across my face. 

He’s your professor, get a hold of yourself.

“How can I help?” he asked, bringing me back to the original reason as to why I was standing in front of him without a cash register between us. 

I cleared my throat. “Um, I was wondering if it was possible to see you outside your normal office hours? I usually work the morning shifts and I don’t want to flood your emails with my questions.” I asked.

“Of course,” he said. “You can come to my office at whatever time works best for you. I know balancing a work and school schedule can be hard. Besides, I’m usually there handling paperwork anyway.” He gave a small shrug, pushing his hands in his pockets. 

“Thank you so much. I look forward to the rest of the semester Professor Reid.” I liked the way his newfound honorific rolled off my tongue. 

“Goodbye, Y/N.”

“Goodbye, Professor.” With that, I left and headed out to meet Tony. 

I was able to find him at the food court. We got some food and chatted more about our classes as well as life outside of school. He made it easy to be his friend, and it was nice having someone to talk to. He works as a waiter so we shared our customer service horror stories and tales of sneaking food at work. It was a nice distraction that took my mind off of Dr. Reid and the ongoing battle of calling him Doctor or Professor. As Tony rambled, my mind wandered about other things I’d like to call Spencer instead. 

●●●

In that short span of two weeks, we already had an exam, an oral presentation, and a report on the psychoanalysis of serial killers. Not one day had been wasted, but this is what to be expected from a summer course. The essay was due the day before. Now we had to wait for our grades which gave us a moment to take a breath.

I was worried that my paper was subpar; especially since I chose to write about Andrei Chikatilo, a serial killer from Ukraine. He wasn’t as popular as those in America, so I ended up spending hours on deep research to find substantial information about his crimes. It also didn’t help that some of the original reports weren’t in English. I had worked hard, and hoped Professor Reid would see that, even if my writing could sometimes be a little weak. I was worried about the grade as our research papers held the weight of 20% of our final mark. 

“Hello? Earth to Y/N! Anyone in there?” Hazel’s voice pierced through my worry bubble, her hand waving in front of my face. I shook my head, trying to focus on restocking the coffee beans.

“Sorry Haze, I’m thinking about this class.”

“Funny you say that; your favorite professor just walked in. Thought you might want to take his order.” She wagged her brows at me, making kissy faces as I hurried to the front register, trying my best to not let my eagerness be so glaringly obvious.

There he was, in his usual handsome glory, patiently waiting for me to take his order. He greeted me with a small smile that I happily returned.

“Hey Doc, what can I get you today?”

He debated for a moment before saying, “Surprise me.”

“Gotcha.” I already had an in my head; it’d been a while since he asked me to make him a random drink so I’d had plenty of time to plan. We got an early shipment of ingredients for our fall-themed drinks and I figured he would appreciate some pumpkin spice in his caffeine. “How are the papers coming along?” I asked casually as I rang him up.

“Pretty well. I’m almost done, so you’ll all receive your grades later today.” Wow, that was fast. I wondered if he stayed up reading all those papers to be done by today. Probably not, a TA must have helped him.

“I am a bit nervous about mine, especially since it’s worth a huge part of our final grade.” I really wanted to get an A in this course, but it was hard juggling everything in such a short amount of time.

“Don’t worry about it too much,” he reassured. “I haven’t properly finished yours yet but it looked great just from what I’ve seen thus far.” His words gave me a little reassurance.

“Thanks. I put a lot of effort into it. Let me grab your coffee now.” Spencer walked towards the pick-up station while I grabbed a venti cup for his drink. Just when I was about to make his order, I saw another familiar face come up to the register. “Tony, hey!” I shouted, placing the cup back down, “What can I get you?” 

This was the first time he’d been here, despite him saying for the past few days that he’d stop by for a visit, even with the promise of a cake pop if he did. It was nice to see another familiar face.

“Hey coffee girl, how you doin’ today?”

“Just peachy. My feet are killing me, though.” Just saying the words caused the ache on the soles of my feet to spike higher. I thanked my lucky stars I was almost done with this eight-hour shift.

“Give me the chance to sweep you off your feet, I promise you won’t regret it.” he offered boldly. It wasn’t the first time he’d joked about taking me out. I laughed, especially since he had a girlfriend. She met us for lunch one day and we became fast friends- she was an incredibly sweet and intelligent girl, polite and elegant as well. It is a wonder how his frat boy charm won her over but opposites attract, I guess.

“Shut up, Casanova. What are you gonna have?”

“I’ll have a grande iced matcha latte, please.” I should’ve known. He told me that he loves matcha flavored food and drinks the first time we grabbed lunch after class. He had complained that there was no good place to get one on campus. 

“Coming right up.” I quickly filled his order since it was faster to make compared to the pumpkin spiced latte. I handed him his bribe-cake pop, matcha flavor of course, while he waited for me to finish making his drink.

“By the way, we’re still studying at the library for the exam later tonight, right?” Tony asked.

“Yup, I’ll meet you at 8.”

“Copy that, see you later coffee girl.” He turned to leave while I turned to make Professor Reid’s order. I put extra whip cream and a bit more syrup to satiate his sweet tooth. I grabbed a fresh chocolate muffin from the display case and popped it into a bag for him as well, drawing yet another pun on the good doctors bag. “Thanks for being such a TEA-rrific professor!”

“Here ya’ go Doc,” I called out before placing his drink and muffin on the counter. I looked up to see him no longer smiling. “Is everything okay?”

Ignoring my question, he said, “I wasn’t aware you were so close to Mr. Montgomery.”

“Oh yeah, we study together once in a while.” I could have sworn I saw his frown deepen before his features became void of any emotions. He shifted his eyes downward, his hand moving rapidly to grab the cup.

“I should get going.”

“Oh, okay” Before I could say goodbye, he was already halfway out the door. 

That was weird. I looked at the counter and noticed that he left the cupcake behind. Maybe he was in a rush?

I shook my head. I needed to concentrate on making it through the last couple of hours of work. 

●●●

I made my way to the classroom, smiling at Tony as he pulled out my seat for me. Professor Reid walked in a few minutes later, his tall figure drawing all the attention to the center of the small stage. He let us know he already graded the papers and that they would be distributed by the TA before the end of class. I had a weird feeling in the pit of my stomach but decided to brush it off and pay attention in class. Despite my attempts to focus on his lecture, I found my mind wandering every so often anyway.

I couldn’t help but think he was less animated today. Usually, he taught with such passion that the class couldn’t take their eyes off him. But today, it felt as if we were all in a boring seminar with an ancient professor. Tony kept glancing at the clock, probably also wondering why time felt like it was going by so slowly. 

I couldn’t shake the unsettled feeling the entire class. It didn’t help matters that every time I would raise my hand to answer a question, he would call on another student. What the hell did I do? 

I decided to tune out the rest of the class. There is no point in being an actively engaged student if I wasn’t going to get treated like one. I’d just get the notes from Tony later.

Thirty minutes before the end of class, the TA handed out our essays while Professor Reid wrapped. 

“Some of you did very well, while a few others struggled with the assignment.” His eyes landed on mine as he said that. It was the first time he had glanced in my direction the whole class. He moved on to the other side of the room. My mind was probably just playing tricks on me. “If you have any questions you can see me at my office hours next week or send me an email. You are dismissed.”

The TA finally made his way over to me, handing my essay in a slight fold. I looked at the grade on top and almost dropped the paper. My heart sped up as I stared at the letter in bright red ink. No way, no way this could be my report. I looked at the right-hand corner and saw my name at the top. I read through the first page and saw they were indeed my words.

How the fuck was it possible that I got a D on this paper? I knew my writing wasn’t the strongest, but a D? 

“How you’d do?” Tony asked. For a moment I forgot I was in a room with other people.

I cleared my throat, trying to relive the lump so that he didn’t hear the croak in my voice. “Umm, not what I expected. I’m going to try to speak to him about it.” Tony was a smart kid, so I was sure he could see how tense I was. Luckily he didn’t question me any further and instead told me he’d text me later before leaving the classroom.

Fortunately, there were no other students in the classroom to slow me down this time. I walked right up to the podium, watching as Professor Reid placed some papers in his satchel. 

“Professor, I need to speak with you.”

“Not now, I’m busy,” he replied, not even bothering to glance in my direction. This can’t be real. The sweet, kind Doc could not be the man acting like a total asshole right now.

“I really need to discuss with you my paper,” I pressed, raising my voice a little louder in an attempt to get his attention. That was wishful thinking on my part since he continued to fiddle with his satchel.

“I said I’m busy,” he uttered once again, his voice void of any emotion. He was about to walk past me, ignoring my whole being. His blatant disregard made my cheeks burn, and not in the usual way they usually did when I was around him.

“Spencer,” I barked, “We need to talk. Now.” For a few moments, he stood in front of me, his back facing my direction.

I was about to speak again before I heard him say, “My office. Half an hour.” He exited, leaving me alone in an empty classroom. The only things keeping me company were the fuming feelings swirling inside me and the failed paper clutched at my fist. 

●●●

I knocked on his office door ten minutes earlier than he’d told me. The anger in my gut brewed hotter the longer I waited. As soon as I heard a “Come in,” I rushed through the door, slamming it behind me. He regarded me coolly, but didn’t comment on my actions. 

“What can I do for you Ms. (Y/L/N)?” I walked up to his large desk, not bothering to take a seat in the chair in front of me. I took a moment to calm myself down before replying.

“Well, you can start by explaining to me why I got such a low score on my paper.” I guess he didn’t like being the only one of us sitting down because he stood up and leaned against the wall behind him.

“It did not meet the requirements for a passing grade as outlined in the rubric. The information given was boring and the overall topic was uninteresting. It was tedious to get through,” he responded nonchalantly, like he was giving me a weather report.  

“You said that you enjoyed it so far.” I rebutted, placing my hands on the desk. I needed something to offer me stability so that I wasn’t visibly shaking.  

“I’d mistaken your work for another student’s. Maybe Mr. Montgomery,” he dryly clipped.

A bitter laugh escaped me as I put the puzzle together. Was- was he serious? Was this man acting like this because of Tony? The audacity! The laugh that bubbled from my lips must have unsettled him. He left his position from the wall in favor of standing in front of me.

“You want to know what I think?” I didn’t give him a chance to respond before continuing, “I think you’re jealous that I have another guy that isn’t you getting friendly with me at the shop and because of your inability to keep your---“

“That is enough,” he grounded out, shaking his head. But I didn’t stop talking.

“--private feelings away from your professional ones, you decided to give me a failing grade. Do you know how hard I worked in-” my voice rose up higher and higher until I was yelling.

“I said that’s enough,” he said again, louder this time. But I wasn’t done.

“-this class? This is my life, my fucking future on the line. I’ve told you how important this all is to me and you don’t even give a shit! You’re going to let your interpretation of my relationship with another student influence the way you do your job? And here I thought you were a decent man, Professor.” I hissed, “Do you even give a damn abo-”

“Enough,” he roared, slamming his hands on the desk and caging me against the wood. His breathing was matching the upbeat pace of my own. His quick movement and the sheer volume of his voice caught me off guard, effectively silencing me. 

“I don’t deserve to be punished over your envy,” I whispered, locking eyes with him in a steady gaze.

“You want to see a real punishment, darling?” he hissed, the heat of his words almost breaking my glare, his breath fanning along my face.

We stared at one another for a while, neither of us willing to be the first to back down. The tension between us kept rising and rising until the inevitable happened. I couldn’t be sure who made the first move but before I knew it, our lips collided with a mix of rage and desperation. My arms draped around his neck as he pressed me on to the desk. He placed his hands on the back of my thighs, lifting me up high enough until I was perched on the cool wooden surface.

Spencer’s lips were soft, a stark contrast to the harsh way he was kissing me. His tongue parted my lips, gliding over mine with fervor. I couldn’t help but moan as he rolled his hips into me. He continued his rough grind, keeping my legs open as we moved as close together as our bodies would allow. He overwhelmed my senses- the smell of him, the taste of him, the feel of him. Everything was making me absolutely feral for this man. 

I never expected the gentle Dr. Reid to be so fervent, so sensual. The kindhearted, sweet professor who regularly drank his weight in caffeine never gave me this impression. But then again, I’m sure he was shocked by my attitude as well. He knew me as the friendly, bubbly barista, now student, who enjoyed his class. He was about to meet a whole new side of me, just like I was going to for him.

Spencer pulled away from me, our mouths making an audible ‘pop’ sound from the sudden separation. I tried to catch my breath as he stared at me, our chests rising and falling together. If I were to move a bit closer to him, we would be touching once again.

He took a few steps back before motioning me to step in front of him. “I want you to get down on your knees. Now.” I wasn’t going to argue with him, mainly because I wanted the exact same thing he did. I kneeled down, keeping my eyes on his face.

“You going to shut me up, Professor?” I teased, feeling powerful, even though he was looming over me. He didn’t reply, just continued to look down on me with those honey colored eyes- full of lust and rage.

I watched as he slowly placed his hands on his slacks, undoing the belt and buttons. He drew down his pants and boxers at the same time, just low enough to reveal his impressive size. My mouth salivated at the sight of his bulge as he came closer to me.

“We’re going to put that smart mouth to better use. Open.” He said, gripping my face between his fingers, forcing me to follow his orders. I opened my mouth slightly, not giving him exactly what he wanted. Instead of ordering my mouth to open further like I expected, he placed his thumb inside. He pushed the digit deep, pressing it against my tongue. I moaned around the finger, softly nibbling at the skin. He continued to slide his finger within my mouth before dragging it out completely. He wiped the excess spit on my cheek before lightly smacking it. The small shock of pain sent a shiver down my spine.

“Open, and do it right this time.”

I obeyed, opening wide enough to accept him into my mouth. My lips were stretched almost uncomfortably in an attempt to fit around him. He was so hot and thick, I couldn’t help but hum at the taste of him on my tongue. The soft “fuck” that fell from his lips had me purring around him. I went to place my hands on the remaining portion that couldn’t fit, but he batted them away.

“You’re using only your mouth.” 

Fine, have it your way, Sir. 

I placed my hands behind me as I bobbed my head, hallowing my cheeks with every rise. His shallow thrusts encouraged me to suck harder. I slowly pulled away to run my tongue against the vein protruding on the underside of his cock. I was rewarded with a groan escaping his lips.

“I should have known that you would be so good at this, darling,” he said, his voice slightly hoarse as he tried to control his grunts.

I made sure to look in his eyes as I swirled my tongue around the head of his cock. The face he made was purely angelic. The muscles of his neck protruded more evidently and his breathing became more labored. I placed him back in my mouth, this time taking my time to go down on him.

“That’s right, Princess. Show me what a good girl you are for me.” He moaned as I felt his hands weave in my hair before he pushed my head down on to him, causing me to gag around him, tears pricking my eyes. He continued his thrusts into my mouth, barely allowing me a chance to breathe. My nose repeatedly touched the base of him as I swallowed around his hard length.

Spencer tightened his fingers in my hair and I knew he wasn’t going to last much longer.  The pace was brutal, but I enjoyed the rough treatment. Knowing that I was the one making him feel good was such a turn on. He buried himself deep in my throat after a few more thrusts to finish. I swallowed his release like the greedy brat that we both now knew I was.

He eventually pulled out, a satisfied sigh leaving his lips. I swiped the back off my hand across my mouth to clean off any leftover spit and cum.

“Get up,” he ordered, his voice hoarse.

I did so, rubbing the ache in my knees as I slowly rose. “I want you bent over the desk,” he continued.

“I want you to answer my previous question.” I quipped.

“You’re not in the position to be making commands,” he growled. He wrapped his fingers in my hair again, pulling just roughly enough so that I was looking up at his face. “If you want this to end well for you, I suggest bending over my desk before I stuff my cock in that bratty little mouth of yours again.”

He released me, eyes still on my face waiting for me to follow through on his order. I turned to his desk and did as he asked, bending over the wood until my chest laid flat against the surface. I waited as patiently as I could for him. It felt as if I was in this position for an eternity before he touched me. He pushed both my underwear and skirt down to my knees before placing his hands on my hips. I heard it before I felt it- the smack on my ass that caused me to yelp.

“Fuck, Spencer. What the—” I was cut off with another resounding smack.

“Did you really think that I wasn’t going to give you a real punishment, darling?” I took a deep breath as another shiver went down my spine. He had no business sounding so hot right now. Another smack, this time on my opposite cheek, had me biting down on my lip to stop myself from crying out.

“This” *SMACK* “Is” *SMACK* “What” *SMACK* “Happens” *SMACK* “To” *SMACK* “Bratty” *SMACK* “Little” *SMACK* “Girls” *SMACK*. A sob ripped from my chest as the last blow landed. My ass was on fire and surely littered with his hand prints.

“You’re lucky I’m in a good mood since you sucked me off so nicely, or I would have made that worse.”

Gee, thanks.

“You look like such a dirty slut like this.” I felt a finger enter me easily, the wetness gathered there making my entrance ready to take him. “So wet. Was it the spanking that got you like this, or your mouth around my cock?” A moan was my only reply as he added another finger, the two digits moving in a scissoring motion. 

“Are you gonna be my sweet girl, now?” He asked as I moved my hips along his fingers, desperately trying to seek some more relief for the fire burning between my thighs as his mouth littered marks along my thighs. I closed my eyes, focusing on the pleasure he was giving me as he curled his fingers, a slow moan falling from my lips. He pulled them out of me, wiping the slickness against my still burning ass. Fucking bastard. I wiggled my hips against him, hoping he would grant me a reprieve and put his fingers back inside me. Instead, he spanked my ass one more time- one quick, sharp blow against the bruised cheek.

Just when I was about to yell at him, he placed the head of his member against my entrance. He moved up and down my drenched entrance before penetrating me in one full thrust. I took a short breath in, trying to get used to feeling so full. He was stretching me out in the most amazing way.

Spencer waited until I was grinding against him before he pulled out and pushed back into me. “Look at you, such a wanton little bitch aren’t you?” He could call me whatever he wanted, as long as he didn’t stop fucking me.

He kept a steady pace, making sure to grind into me every time he slammed back in. The obscene sound of our skin smacking against one another’s and the moans escaping our throats was an erotic symphony that had my body heat raising the temperature in the room.

He hitched my leg on top of the desk, entering in an angle that made the pleasure so much better. I couldn’t stop the whines that kept escaping my mouth every time he pounded into me. His hand stayed upon my leg, holding me down and limiting my movements. His nails dug into the skin so harshly I was sure there would be bruises left in their wake.  

“Fuck, you feel so good wrapped around me,” he hissed under his breath. “Should have known you just needed to be fucked like the cheap whore you are.” He sped up, hips snapping at an almost punishing pace. The desk creaked every time he slammed into me. I hoped no one was nearby to hear what was going on. A whine left my throat when I felt his fingers rub against my clit. I was so close now.

“Should I stay inside you? Fill you up so you walk around campus carrying my child?” He growls, his pace increasing with each passing moment. “Knock you up so the whole campus knows what a whore you are for me?” He asks, earning a cry ripped from my throat. 

“Who’s fucking you?” he grunted. I don’t know how he expected me to form a coherent statement at this current moment. My eyes could barely stay open at this point. 

“Spencer, please.” He smacked the outside of my thigh.

“Try again, who’s fucking you?” 

“You are, Doctor.” Apparently, that was the wrong answer too, because it earned me another smack on my thigh. I had tears streaming down my face from the pleasurable pain he was giving me.

“You have one more chance or else I’m not letting you come. Now, who’s is fucking you?”

“Professor Reid!” I cried out.

“That’s right darling. Now come on my cock.” A harsh bite on my neck was the ultimate push that had me seeing stars. Spencer thrusted a few more times before fully sheathing himself within me.

He slumped over me, the feel of his breath against my neck causing me to shiver once more. We took a moment to have the high leave our body before he pulled out of me, a gasp leaving the both of us. Spencer was the first to break the silence between us.

“Would you like to have dinner with me?” he asked, his voice a bit shy. 

I giggled at his demeanor. A few moments ago, he was fucking me senseless and spanking me over his desk like a porno, and now he was asking me out to dinner. 

“Absolutely,” I smiled. “But I should probably cancel my study plans.” I quickly added. 

He led me to the faculty bathroom so I could freshen myself up. When I emerged, he was back to being the prim and proper professor I knew him to be. Just before we left his office, he leaned down and whispered, “By the way, you got an A.”

#spencer reid #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid fanfic #spencer reid smut #spencer reid imagine #Criminal Minds #Criminal Minds Fanfiction #criminal minds smut #reid smut #Smut #dr spencer reid #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x y/n #spencer reid x you #spencer reid reader insert #reader insert #mgg #dom!spencer #professor reid #professor spencer reid #secret fic swap

[americangirlstar]

Now that both Courtney books are out and I’ve read and processed them both, I do want to say that I think they’re the least well-written of any of the AG books, but not through any fault of their own- let me explain.

(Note that for this discussion I’m ignoring the Doylist criticisms- Courtney and 3/4 of her friend group being white again, the lack of gay discussion in-text in regards to the HIV crisis, etc. These are valid complaints and concerns, but not what we’re talking about right now.)

The Problem with the Current Book Length

I think the main problem with Courtney stems from the fact her books are so short. American Girl has literally been doing the stupidest things in regards to their books lately, almost as if they’re trying to sabotage them on purpose. First they remove illustrations in 2015- when their target audience is about nine years old. I don’t know about you, but when I was six and getting into American Girl, the illustrations were the highlight for me. Not because I had no attention span and loved pretty pictures, but because it showed me firstly what the girl’s life was like, whether it be 1760s wilderness or 2001 Chicago. It was like stepping into their world, really helping you get into their heads, which was basically what the dolls were supposed to do, to let you know that girls like you exist throughout time and space.

As well as that, the illustrations were free advertisement. I can’t tell you how excited me and my sisters were as children to go to the American Girl place and look at the doll displays, shouting that that’s the dress Felicity wears to the ball! or look, Josefina’s goat looks exactly like the book! AG cut that from 2015 to 2020, as if they were trying to appeal to an older audience- while at the same time changing all the doll outfits, accessories and marketing to appeal to a younger demographic.

Now, this isn’t about the illustrations, as Courtney got those- it’s about what they did to the historical characters after the Illustration Outrage™ happened. See, they’d condensed the historical six-book format into two books- not necessarily a bad idea, parents would be more likely to buy two books for their kid than consider buying six. However, they then claimed that if they put illustrations back, they would have to abridge the books- literally my nightmare.

First of all, American Girl, we know for a fact you can fit all six books plus illustrations into ONE VOLUME, let alone two. You’re just being cowards here and trying to nerf your own stories for... some reason.

So that meant a lot of important things got cut- Rebecca’s Chanukah story, Melody’s cousin’s house search, Maryellen’s Christmas adventure... all things important to the girls’ histories and character.

The Problem with Courtney’s Writing

Now, Courtney was the first doll to be released after the abridging began, meaning her books were released, in their entirety, just as short as the abridged stories. So it basically means she gets four books while the others get six- and unlike the others, Courtney doesn’t even have mysteries or short stories to pad out. (And honestly, looking at her book’s amount of content, I’d even argue that she basically got two while everyone else got six, but I digress.)

The problem with her books isn’t that they have an author writing them poorly (I really feel like her author was doing the best with what limited time she had), but in how cramped American Girl made them. Because, well, Courtney has to deal with a lot in such a short amount of words.

Let’s compare her to Julie, for instance- Julie pretty much has a new 70s thing every book. In order: feminism, rising divorce rates, San Francisco’s Chinese culture, environmentalism, the country’s bicentennial, anti-bullying and deaf acceptance. And adding to this, we also have her own personal journies through her parents’ divorce and move, her basketball team, her friendship with Ivy (and later Joy), overcoming her fear of horses, student council, detention... It’s a lot, and yet her books don’t feel rushed or forced at all. It’s just a year in the life of a girl going through a lot of new and sudden events, and how she grows and changes throughout them. She may not be as deep a character as Addy or Kirsten, but not every girl goes through the trials and tribulations they do, and it’s a good series overall.

Courtney, meanwhile, does feel rushed and forced, because of the short timespan. Instead of fitting everything into a six-book format- or even at two-book format that is the same length and content as the six-book- everything has to be fit into two short books.   Everything Courtney has to cover includes the topics of divorce and stepfamilies, feminist and technological advancement, the Challenger explosion, the HIV crisis, Hands Across America, and the founding of Pleasant Company. And in Courtney’s own journey, she has to cover her learning to stand up for herself, her relationship with her stepsister and Tina’s own character development, her mother running for mayor and how that affects her, how much she misses her Dad after he moves, her friendship with Sarah (note on that later), her basically getting hate-crimed after standing up for her friend... that’s a LOT of stuff, and I didn’t even include the non-AG 80s product placement they shove into her collection.

But without the longer format, everything is pushed together to its detriment. Tina’s development and Maureen’s mayoral candidacy are two plotlines that are literally dropped and almost completely ignored in the second book. The Challenger and HIV issues were handled decently, but the Challenger only lasted a few short chapters, and the HIV topic was not as informative as it could be, leaving out several things like Reagan’s refusal to treat it for so long, and its effect on the gay community. Honestly, the HIV scare was more shifted to focus on the mob mentality of a new and scary disease- which, while needed right now, also ignores many of the bigotry-related reasons it became an epidemic. Pleasant Company’s inclusion feels forced in, and I think was the only resolution she had to her Dad plotline?

And don’t get me started on the Sarah plotline- every Girl of the Year since Kanani- sans Isabelle and Luci- has had the story of “oh no I’ve been ignoring my friend and now they’re mad at me :(” and it’s SO old. Seriously, I counted the contemporary dolls that have had that storyline, and it’s thirteen*. Thirteen times we’ve covered this issue- almost all of it in quick succession- and now we have to deal with it in a historical character book while much more important things are going on! Yes, it sucks when a friend ditches you while you’re being attacked and bullied for something you’re standing up for, but once again, with how much is happening in such a short book, it just feels like a forced-in plotline that we’ve seen a billion times, and with their falling-out happening mainly due to the attention Courtney was given Isaac, it serves to make Sarah seem closed-minded at best and bigoted at worst- it’s clarified that she’s not, she’s just scared and upset with Courtney, but when you put those events so close together, it leads the reader to lump them together and get the impression that, you know, Sarah is a worse person than she is.

*Full count: Nicki (book 2), Chrissa (book 2), Kanani (2), McKenna (1 iirc?), Saige (both books), Grace (2), Lea (3), Gabriela (1 and 3), Tenney (2), Z (1), Blaire (1), Joss (1) and Kira (1).

It’s a bit weird, too, that Courtney’s... what’s the word? Vibe? with her how her story is written and marketed Is closer to the Contemporaries than the Historicals. Am I the only one feeling this? My best explanation for it is that the author, Kellen Hertz, had only written contemporary books for American Girl before- the third Lea Clark book and all four Tenney Grant books, both of which contained the Friendship Issues™ plot. I’m not at all saying she’s a bad author- I honestly love the way the Tenney books are written- and I’m not saying she couldn’t write a historical book, but it’s clear American Girl didn’t ask her to change up her style or content from what she’d done for them before, as well as giving her way too much to cover in such short books.

Conclusion

Honestly, this conclusion should be obvious- American Girl needs to expand their books again. Whether they simply allow the books to be unabridged, or go back to the six-book format, Courtney's books are too cramped to tell an effective story, let alone the poor abridged girls.

The other girls were given six-book length, so if they went back to that length or format, Courtney would have to be rewritten, at least a little- and that’s okay! There’s a lot of things that could use expansion or connection, such as her Summer trip with her Dad that was given basically one sentence in the text. Her growth with her stepfamily could be acknowledged- and honestly? I think that if these books were expanded, her mother’s mayoral arc should either continue through the books, or Maureen should become mayor before the book 2 arc. I’ve mentioned this before, but having Maureen as mayor (or even still a candidate) would put a lot of pressure on Courtney to be perfect so that nobody can say “look at how awful this woman is for doing politics instead of raising her family right”- which means that when the Isaac stuff happens, it has even more stakes for Courtney and her family. Does her Mom still support her with her own reputation on the line, and what does that say about Maureen’s character, how does it affect Courtney and the D’Amicos... that’s all fascinating stuff that was completely missed out on.

And if she was turned into a six-book format- honestly, here’s how I’d do it, just off the top of my head. It would involve a bit of event shuffling, but honestly I think it would work!

Meet Courtney - pretty much the setup for everything happening, her starting to get her Crystal Starshooter plans and her mom’s campaign beginning.

Courtney Learns a Lesson - her relationship to Tina, culminating in the Challenger incident.

Courtney’s Surprise - we move the founding of Pleasant Company over here, since Molly’s basically her Christmas Present. We’ll probably need an additional plotline- maybe similar to Julie, she can have a story on spending the holidays in different places.

Happy Birthday Courtney - end of summer, aka meeting Isaac and her trip with her Dad.

Courtney Saves the Day - Beginning of the HIV arc, ending at her presentation to her class.

Changes for Courtney - Continuation of the HIV arc as things get worse for her and Isaac, ending where Friendship Superhero ends.

Is that a perfect sorting? Probably not, I came up with it in ten minutes. But would it give Courtney space to breathe and more time to explore everything happening to her? Probably!

The tl;dr of this is honestly that American Girl are absolute cowards right now, and need to expand their books back. Their abridging is only harming their stories- which, as Courtney herself points out, are the reason girls got into their company in the first place.

#courtney moore #american girl #american girl dolls #american girls #1986 #negativity #mine #americangirlstar

[maplecornia]

chapter 9

𝔴𝔬𝔯𝔡 𝔠𝔬𝔲𝔫𝔱: 2.61K

𝔤𝔢𝔫𝔯𝔢: romance | slice of life | fluff | angst | bts x female!reader | ot7

𝔰𝔲𝔪𝔪𝔞𝔯𝔶: You watched them from the sidelines ever since you were a young teenage girl. Now you’re grown up, they’ve returned after 2 long years and everything has changed. What happens when you pull back the mask and find the darkness within? What happens when you see that they’re broken?

𝔞/𝔫: this chapter makes me laugh, especially the scene with Jojo and Namjoon.

𝔴𝔞𝔯𝔫𝔦𝔫𝔤𝔰: cliffhangers | angst | fluff | slight mentions of self hatred | depression | mental health illness | self harm | occurs in the year 2024 | set in a timeline where BTS went to the military together | slight language

tags:@kookaine |@fangirl125reader |@kookiebbyxx |@taradevonne

You’ve been waiting for an hour.

Tilting your head back, you sigh, extremely bored.

You've tried everything you could think of to bypass the time. Reading, writing, watching YouTube, then switching over to Netflix, even attempting to doze in the slightly uncomfortable waiting room chair.

None of them have worked.

Currently, you're doodling in your sketchbook, but no concrete idea comes to mind for the sketch. Leaving you with tiny flowers, faces, and body parts on the page as though it were a practice sheet.

Peering over the sketchbook, you scan the room for any sign of life, but as the day has dragged on, so has the crowd.

You don't see any sign of Kim Namjoon anywhere, and the receptionist hasn't called you over ever since you turned in the forms she gave you. Uninterested, your eyes glazing over, you pull out your phone, peering at the time.

12:30 pm.

Heaving a sigh, you tilt your head back, the music playing through your GalaxyBuds. Yet it does no good to lift your spirits.

You suppose it's only fair, you made him wait, now it's his turn.

Setting your phone down once more, you purse your lips, as your gaze falls on a flower swaying in the wind outside.

It's the only flower you can see amongst the bush. It stands almost forlornly in the midst of multiple of its fellow brethren withered around it. Still, it stands strong, unwilling to fall victim to the harsh weather outside.

A thought crossing your mind, you turn to your sketchbook, quickly turning the page and beginning a vigorous sketch before you lose your idea.

Unbeknownst to you, as you progress halfway through the sketch, Kim Namjoon bursts into the lobby, looking out of breath and flustered.

He wears a bright white T-shirt, one with a small black Nike emblem across his left pectoral muscle. It hangs sort of loose around his neck, his collarbone visible as cooling sweat causes him to glisten like a bright star.

It's not as noticeable, considering that he wears a thick black sweatshirt zipped down around his shoulders. It's simple, with thin white stripes running down the sleeves and white soft underlining to it.

The black sweats he wears seem to fit with the outfit, the same white stripes running down each pant leg. Each piece of clothing has a Nike emblem on it and pairs well with the white Nike AirForces he wears on his feet.

They’re simple but rich clothes and bring to mind the same clothes Jungkook was wearing before.

The cooling sweat on his skin and the way his hair falls a bit messily underneath his cap could lead to the presumption that they were doing a major dance practice before all of this.

No matter the case, he didn't expect the meeting to take this long, and he feels terrible for making you wait, despite everything. As he looks for any sign of you, he doesn't find any.

Worried that you have already left, he knocks on the front desk, gathering the attention of the receptionist that helped you earlier. Kim Jojo raises her head, and as she catches sight of RM, her eyes widen just the slightest bit, but not enough for him to notice.

“Good afternoon, Mr. Namjoon, what can I--”

“Yes, yes hello.” Namjoon interrupts her, too panicked to care about formalities.

He wants to catch you before you get tired of waiting and leave. First impressions are everything to him, and if he has a bad one…Shaking the worry away, he leans forward over the counter separating the receptionist from him and she flinches away at the sudden closeness.

RM either doesn't notice or doesn't care, but either way, he meets her with an intent stare, every word uttered from his lips urgent and careful.

“Has anyone by the name of Lin Yen come in?” The receptionist opens her mouth to respond but before she can say anything, he holds up a finger.

A thought having crossed his mind, he reaches into his back pocket, bringing out his phone. He tries to bring up the picture of you while Jojo stands there, half in shock, half in annoyance. As soon as he finds it, he lets out a little victory shout, one that startles her.

Grinning, he presents it to her, and she peers at a strange picture of you. After she looks at it, Jojo pulls back, her brows crinkling in confusion.

“She looks like this. If she came in, could you please tell me? I've been waiting since 8:00 this morning to meet her.” Jojo sighs, trying to gain her composure before responding.

“Mr. Namjoon--” she begins, but Namjoon interrupts once more.

“She’s my new assistant, you see, and I need to begin her training today. She needs to know the ropes before our busy season comes back around.” He explains, pulling the phone back and trying to pocket it once more.

Instead, he ends up knocking over a container filled with an assortment of pens and pencils. Surprised, he fumbles to pick it up but ends up spilling it all over the floor. Cursing under his breath, he reaches down to pick up some pencils that have fallen.

Letting out a frustrated sigh, Jojo picks up the container, righting it on the counter with a loud thud. Startled, RM glances up at her eyes wide, and she smiles sweetly.

“Please, just leave it.” She says between her teeth. He shrugs, almost reluctantly standing. She sighs in relief, carefully putting the pens and pencils back in their place.

“Now...Mr. Namjoon, please listen--” once more, she cannot finish, Namjoon unable to shut up to save his life.

“I’m sorry, but if you need any more information on her I could--”

“Kim Namjoon!” This time it's Jojo's turn to interrupt him, her patience finally wearing thin.

RM instantly falls silent, a bit surprised at the outburst.

Jojo takes a steadying breath before continuing.

“Now, the person you are talking about has already come in. I told her you were in a meeting and had her wait in the waiting room for you to return.” At the information, RM turns to the waiting room where he catches sight of you for the first time in real life.

He notices you vigorously sketching out your idea. Smiling, he can't help but smile at the familiarities he finds in you. You look exactly like the picture Jaejin sent, despite how weird it was.

“I had expected to receive a notice of your return, so I could send her to you, but now that you're here….” Namjoon turns away from you and flashes his contagious smile at Jojo who is once more taken aback.

“Thank you,” Namjoon says with gratitude, reaching across the desk and holding her hand as he bows before turning away.

Jojo, watching him go, turns beet red before collapsing behind the desk in exhaustion. Another fellow receptionist cries out with alarm before tending to her in concern.

You, once more, having no awareness of the events happening around you, continue to sketch. Having finished the rough sketch you begin to define every line, detail, and curve. As you work, you bite the inside of your cheek, sometimes licking your lips in your trance of concentration.

When you're lost in your mind of imagination and creativity, nothing from the outside world can distract you.

And yes, that also includes a very tall, very real version of Kim Namjoon striding towards you.

You don't look up as he comes within a few feet in front of you. You don't even notice as he bends to your eye level, trying to catch your attention. It doesn't break your concentration, even as you reach for an eraser, lightly humming to the music playing in your ears. He smiles, almost laughing at your concentration before he covers his mouth, trying to be quiet so that you don't notice he’s there.

Trying to tease you, he carefully (as much as he’s able) sits down next to you. He was planning on pulling out one of your GalaxyBuds and surprising you, but as he catches a glimpse of your work, he’s stopped cold.

It's breathtaking.

You have created an awestruck image of a woman, on her knees. She wails out in agony as she sits amongst a pile of ash, flecks of it falling around her as though there's a fire burning nearby.

However, that’s not what catches Namjoon’s eye.

Amongst the ash, if anyone looks closely, they'll be able to see that there are small, scattered remains of bones hidden.

She sits amongst them, wailing, the look on her face one of pure anguish and sorrow as the ash from the fading bones stains her skin and her dress.

As though she has lost everyone she’s held, dear.

RM can't seem to look away, entranced by the grotesque beauty of the image and the talent of the artist.

He admires the way you set it up, the way you created the girl imperfectly, but still real. Because after all, who in real life is perfect? As he watches your pencil move expertly across the page, he can't help but think that with each stroke, the creation grows more and more lifelike.

As though she were truly crying out in the pain her heart brings. As though she were alive and breathing.

Almost against his wishes, his hand reaches out to touch the paper, if only to make sure that the actual sketch is truly a mere fabrication of pencil and paper.

As his fingers graze the parchment, that is when you snap out of your concentration.

Eyes widening, you jolt up straight, immediately turning to look at your side.

As soon as your eyes meet Namjoon’s, his hand flinches off the paper. He lets out a soft gasp as he flinches away, surprised by your sudden attention.

Just like with Jungkook, you're frozen in place.

Unable to move.

Unable to function.

Unable to speak.

And just like Jungkook, Namjoon is the same way.

But for a different reason.

He was caught in the act, and he doesn't know what to do.

Your eyes hold him in a sort of bind.

For a moment he forgets what he was doing there, he forgets what his purpose is, for a moment he even forgets why you are there.

For a split second, it's just you and him in a pocket in space.

Your eyes holding his, his eyes holding yours.

Kim Namjoon.

The leader of BTS. The first member of the group you have grown to love. Talented, handsome, a practical genius, he is just as mature and intimidating as you expected him to be.

Despite how close the two of you are sitting, he still seems larger than life, and for a moment, you wonder if he’s even real.

He doesn't seem like it after all.

His skin seems too real, too perfect. His hair is too soft, too smooth. His eyes are too warm and too brown.

Almost exactly like the milky chocolate brown you’ve seen so often in so many photos, except for one thing.

As you stare into them, you can see life so clearly alight in them. How they reveal so many emotions at the same time. There are so many that it's almost impossible to read them at all. Serene and peaceful, they are poets' eyes.

So emotional, yet so mysterious and secretive at the same time.

Dreamboat eyes.

“Kim Namjoon?” you whisper, almost unsure if it's him or not.

As you do, his face makes that mixed expression between confusion and amusement as he chuckles softly, looking away and breaking the connection. Holding his hand up to his mouth, he nods, clearing his throat, but not saying anything for a moment.

“Yes, that's who I am, and you must be...Lin Yen?” your heart jumps at the fact that he knows your name.

Speechless, all you can do is nod mutely as he utters another adorable chuckle, one that always seems to remind you of Goofy.

“Jaejin didn't tell me you were an artist.” As soon as he says that, you notice that your sketchbook is still open, and showcasing your imperfect, unready sketch.

Panicking, you fumble to get it closed. Blushing, you hug it tightly to your chest, as though it could erase the fact that he just got a sneak peek into your very soul.

“What's wrong? It was good!” RM asks, worried.

Biting your bottom lip in trepidation, you shake your head, hiding your face.

“Don't lie….” you mumble.

You know it wasn't close to being done, and it wasn't nearly as perfect as it could have been. You're quite disappointed in it at the moment. You feel as though it was too rushed due to the many ideas pouring out from your brain at the exact moment.

As you take an ashamed peek at Namjoon, you find him staring at you, a slight smile playing on his lips.

“What's wrong, are you okay?” he asks, tilting his head as though you were a shy child. You smirk, playing along and nodding very slowly before he continues.

“I see. You should know, however, that you are very talented.” At the compliment, you snort in disbelief, shoving the sketchbook and pencils back safely in your satchel.

“Please.” You sigh. “I know I'm no Picasso, and certainly not talented.”

Finished with packing your art supplies, you are reminded of the reason you are here. A blush of shame appearing on your cheeks, you turn to Namjoon, a bit guiltily.

“And I’m also not known as the bird to rise before the worm.” RM seems a bit confused before you stand and bow to him in apology.

“I am so sorry for being late today. You see I….”

Remembering the receptionist's words from before, you decide to keep the reason to yourself.

“....I have nothing to say for myself. I'm sincerely sorry.”

“Please, there’s no need for that,” Namjoon responds, standing himself and tapping you on the shoulder.

At the touch, you stand straight, only to find an extremely tall man standing before you, looking more intimidating than before. Heart beating fast you gulp, stepping back a bit.

Luckily, he doesn't notice your act of distance and just smiles at you before continuing.

“After all, I was late as well, so let's call it even, huh?”

You smirk and nod, thankful that he’s not too angry about it, but it doesn't completely erase your guilt.

“But now that you mention it….” Namjoon starts and intrigued, you glance up to see him back up a bit as well.

Confused, you raise an eyebrow before he holds out his hand to you.

“My name is Kim Namjoon, I’ll be your boss during your time here. First and foremost, welcome to BigHit entertainment, I hope you enjoy your time working here with us.” He introduces himself, warmly.

Catching on, you take his hand, shaking it gently, and trying to ignore the fact that yours is much more like a child's compared to his.

“Hello, Mr. Namjoon! It's a pleasure to finally meet you, my name is Lin Yen and I look forward to working with you!” you respond, returning his grin with one of your own.

After you're finished introducing yourself, he releases your hand and steps back, taking your satchel in his hands and handing it to you.

“Well, Ms. Lin, are you ready to begin?” He asks, and you accept the offer, hiking the satchel on your shoulder before looking up at him in expectation.

“Where do we start?”

𝔫𝔬𝔱𝔢: first day at work is finally starting, yall excited? eheheehehe get ready for some namjooon and yen moments to come

chapter 10 here

check the Infinite Stars masterlist for more chapters

check my BTS masterlist for other BTS content

check out my masterlist for other kpop fanfics

#{infinite stars} updated! #bts ot7 #bts ot7 fanfic #bts ot7 fanfiction #bts fanfic #bts fanfiction #fanfic #fanfiction #bts fanfiction series #bts fluff #bts x reader #bts x female!reader #bts #bts angst #angst #fluff #wattpad #ao3 #wattpad writer #ao3 writer #series #dudududud #badumdumdum #idk i'm bored #watching fast and furious while i'm scheduling these so

[boldlyvoid]

Amoreena | chapter eleven

chapter eleven

main summary: Heaven is a real place and it's located exactly 14.6 miles away from the FBI, Quantico Headquarters. Off behind a small park, under a fantastical willow tree surrounded by wildflowers, in every colour young minds can imagine.

Don't forget, heaven also comes with angels.

Chapter Warnings: Y/N POV: details of what happened to Stephen, her grandmas cancer, and very detailed explanations of how babies are made (as biologically accurate and not very graphic as possible) this is an angsty trauma filled chapter that made me cry a lot just writing it so I'm sorry in advance

word count: 3K

from the beginning <3

June 13th, 2010

There’s a knock on her parent's door at 4 in the morning, Y/N’s sound asleep on the couch back at her grandma’s, awoken by said grandmother as she hears all the noise beyond the porch. There are 2 cop cars at the main house, worry starts to settle over them.

She puts on a pair of shoes, taking her grandmother's hand in hers as they begin the early morning trek up the road, anxiety seeping in deeper and deeper as they get closer to the lights illuminating their driveway.

Her father is talking to an officer on the steps, her mother is crying behind him. “We’re so sorry for your loss,” the officer says and Y/N’s blood runs cold, numbing her from the impending despair.

“What happened?” Her grandmother asks, rubbing a hand along Y/N’s back in preparation for the worst.

“Evan was in a car accident,” her father says softly, knowing that Y/N knows Stephen was with him tonight. She breaks away from her grandma and without thinking she’s right in the officer's face.

“Which one of them died?”

“Ma’am,” it was never a good way to start the worst conversation of her life with that word or in that tone. She felt like a '40s housewife learning her husband wasn’t coming home from the war, only he wasn’t even her husband yet.

He would have been on next Saturday.

“I’m sorry, Stephen was pronounced dead on the scene,” he says the worst sentence she’s ever heard, and now she’ll never forget it. “The passenger side took the worst of it, once again, I am so sorry for your loss.”

She’s surprisingly calm, managing to whisper, “thank you,” before she’s walking off into the field, pushing everyone's hands away as she travels as far as he feet will take her.

She ends up at the willow tree by the pond as soon as the sun is rising, it happened a lot earlier in June than the rest of the year. The birds singing, the wind blowing against the leaves making them carry a tune in harmony together. The world is still spinning, life is moving on, but how?

She sat there against the tree for a while, picking blades of grass and weaving them into a chain, soothing her brain as she makes a pattern. Giving her hands something to do so they stop going numb, it’s the only thing that really reminds her that she's real, that she’s controlling the twists and tucks, the shape and length and the fact that it was created at all.

Ending the life of the single blade of grass as she picks it, never to be whole again. Snatched from its happy place, where it grew loved and surrounded by other matching green strands as they blew in the wind.

Then she's pulling fist full after fist full of grass out of the dirt, her hands covered in mud as she shouts, throwing handfuls of grass and dirt towards the pond. The once blue water starting to turn cloudy; disrupted and upset with her anger as it swallows her weapons, but it doesn’t make her feel better. All she did was disrupt the earth, changing the way this once beautiful patch of land used to look. She couldn’t help but sob, realizing that she was like this field now and her beautiful green pasture was disrupted, overturned and ruined.

The life that flowed through her died along with the love of her life.

“Stephen was pronounced dead on the scene,” the words echo in her mind in a constant circle like she’s stuck in a tin can.

It starts to reverberate, getting louder and louder as the same 7 words all run around in her head. Bouncing off the walls, smacking her down again and again as she hears them over and over and over… she’s holding her hands on her ears, shaking back and forth, sobbing when she feels someone wrap their arms around her.

She doesn’t open her eyes, instead, she's rushing to push them off of her, struggling out of their grasp as she fights them. Finally, she loses, being held in her brother's embrace as they both cry, he barely has a scratch on him when she finally looks at him.

she’s never been physical in her life, but she punched him right in the face. Her twin brother, best friend in childhood and the person she’s known the longest in her life. He held her close in the womb, crying if they separated as soon as they were born, she loved him deeply and yet she hated him something fierce at that moment.

“It wasn’t my fault,” Evan cries, “we were stopped at a red light, Y/N!”

“I don’t care! He was supposed to be my husband!” She swats at him, smacking his arms again and again as he tries to hold them back, holding her so tightly as she basically screams bloody murder in the field.

All she can see is his face, her beautiful happy Stephen. The first time she ever saw him, standing under a street light in Boston, papers in his hand and wonder in his eyes. The way he looked up at her, the glow of the light making a halo glow over his head.

She should have known he was too good to be true. Always destined to return to the heavens, he was truly angelic with his big emerald eyes that were only the tiniest bit yellow on the edge of the pupil, the way her name sounded on his tongue like a blessing coming true.

They buried him 2 days after what was supposed to be their wedding. Disrupting another beautiful patch of earth to hide him away forever, she placed a single rose on his casket, she never said goodbye and she never planned to.

“See you later, superstar,” she patted the glossy black box once last time before sending him down into the earth.

—

September 2012

This fucking willow tree and 7-word sentences…

“What do you mean you have cancer?”

Her grandma let a tear slip from her eye, “I’ve got colon cancer, honey, the doctors said I have another 2 years, maybe 5 if I'm lucky.”

Every time someone sat beside her in this one spot, she learned the worst information in the world. Sure Evan didn’t mean to kill Stephen, doesn’t mean she’s talked to him at all in the last year. with Grandpa dying only a few summers back, her favourite house cat now buried in the yard, she can’t lose her grandma now too.

“Okay,” she starts to plan in her head, her eyes about ready to jump out of her skull as she tries to think of all the things they need to do before it’s too late, “let’s go to England, let’s blow my bank account, you can’t leave me without going to England with me? We were supposed to get tea and pretend to be the queen and princess?”

She couldn’t stop the tears, her whole body heaving as she sobbed into her grandma’s dress, “you can’t leave me too!”

“Your grandfather and I have a fund for you, you were the last baby we got to raise when your mom went back to work, I want you to use it for that baby we talked about,” her grandma’s voice is barely a whisper, softly getting the words over her vocal cords as the tears joined Y/N’s on her dress.

Without another word, she took her hand and walked home, getting in her car together and heading to the closest fertility clinic, she booked her first insemination for February, pre-paying for a round of IVF hormones and everything to start in January, she had 3 months to plan.

Finding the perfect donor was the only hard part. She had 3 different books to choose from with all the clinics in the DC area sharing 1 sperm bank. She finally made her decision 3 weeks before they were set to get her pregnant when they updated the books.

Sample 2319, male 30’s, healthy, high IQ, 6’1, brown eyes, brown hair (curly). “Sounds a lot like Stephen,” her grandma agreed, saying his name for the first time in over 2 years, she knew this was her guy.

—

June 14th, 2021

Peeing on a stick shouldn’t be as terrifying as it is.

She hasn’t been this nervous since the first time Dr. Collins inseminated her. Laying back on the table at a weird elevation to make sure she got pregnant, her whole body tense as she thought of the possibilities of her future child.

Sample 2319 sitting in a cup not too far from her face as she prepared for a man she barely knew to put the semen of another man she didn’t know, inside her. She only picked this guy cause he was smart and tall, no health issues to report and the number made her think of Monsters Inc.

In her mind, she made a baby with a man she named mike wazowski, not knowing his real name was actually Spencer Reid and he was only just down the road at Quantico the whole time. It was the weirdest day ever, and then it became the second-best day of her life

Nothing could top holding her baby in her arms for the first time. Her grandma and mother beside her as they all cried, the perfect purple baby screaming on her chest as they tried to wipe the white gunk off her tiny body. her sweet little coos, seeing her swollen eyes open for the first time, the silence that overcame her as they made their first introduction to each other. Her little person, the love of her life, her wonderful Amoreena.

Her cry was perfect, like music to her ears she wanted to hear her little voice as long as she could because it meant she was alive and real. She was healthy and beautiful and the most perfect bundle of joy she could have ever made.

Now she was hiding in the bathroom to pee on a stick while her 7-year-old had breakfast in the next room. Oh, how times changed, but one thing remained the same, she was finding out alone again. Only this time she meant for that to happen, it was exactly 4 days since her period was supposed to start and it wasn’t there, neither was Spencer.

He had something to do that morning, but he’d be meeting them later that afternoon, it was Amoreena’s last day of kindergarten after all. She wanted time to either enjoy the thought of having another baby or cry in peace because for once it didn’t work, giving her a week to recover before trying again.

Amoreena was a miracle, the easiest IVF baby they ever made at the clinic, apparently. If she was pregnant this easily again it was a sure sign that he was Amoreena’s father too, only he could get her knocked up while not even trying.

She didn’t remember pregnancy tests taking this long, she flipped it over and walked out of the room, unable to think of anything else while she waited for 3 minutes to pass. Amoreena noticed she was being weird, studying her mother's movements as she paced the hall outside of the bathroom door.

“What are you doing?” She asked, curious as ever as she twirled lightly in her new princess dress.

“Can you keep a secret?”

“Always mom, I’m the best secret keeper in all the kingdom, remember?” Amoreena smiled, holding onto her leg as she stared up at her.

“Your dad and I tried to make a baby,” she whispered, petting the litter hairs on her forehead as Amoreena looked up at her, her first little baby. “I’m waiting to find out if it worked, but we can’t tell anyone in case it didn’t, okay?”

Amoreena’s eyes were wider than she’s ever seen them, her mouth opened slowly as she understood the words in her mind. She didn’t look happy or surprised, nor upset or worried. She looked confused, “how?”

She laughed then, shaking her head as she lifted Amoreena into her arms, she would have to know soon anyway. “You know how every month mummy has a bad week where she bleeds and her tummy hurts?”

“Yeah?”

“When people with our parts grow up they make little tiny eggs but we don’t lay them like chickens do, they stay inside our tummies and wait to become babies and if they don’t we have a period and release all the stuff our bodies saved up that month to make a little person. You’ll have one soon too in a few years, probably when you're 12 like I was, and when people with a penis get old enough they’re able to help us make the babies like roosters help the chickens. Our bodies are really special and make some really cool things when we try to,” she explained it in the most simple farmhouse way she could.

“Like when the goats are all born in the spring and they just show up?” She tried to clarify, understanding it at the basic level.

“Kinda, you’ve seen the photos of you in my tummy and how aunty Shannon’s stomach grew when she had your cousins, I’ll get really big like that too if I’m pregnant, the baby will grow for 9 long months till they’re nice and healthy and then we’ll have another person in the family,” she couldn’t help but smile as she thought about it.

“How do we find out?”

She opened the bathroom door then and carried Amoreena inside, setting her down on the sink and pointing at the upside-down test stick. “We create a special hormone when we’re pregnant, it’s something that can be detected in our pee!” she explained it like it was magic, watching her get excited instead of grossed out.

“So I peed on that stick and if it has 2 lines I have a baby in my tummy, if not then your dad and I have to try again.”

Amoreena picked up the test and looked at it, keeping it out of her mothers sight as she did so, “there’s two lines,” she lit up waving the stick lightly as she squealed.

Y/N wrapped her up in her arms and twirled her around, “you’re gonna be the best big sister ever!”

“How do we tell dad?” Amoreena’s soft voice whispered in her ear as she snuggled into her shoulder.

“I have an idea,” she whispered back before carrying her back into the kitchen.

Her All About Me project was sitting on the counter, ready for Y/N to drive her into school today. She set Amoreena down on the floor to watch her as she took some tape and taped the stick to the bottom corner of the project. “Pass me the marker, please?”

Amoreena ran to the counter to get it, coming back and placing it in her mom's hand before leaning in to watch what she was writing.

“I’m going to be a big sister sometime next February!” Amoreena read the words as her mother wrote them, unbelievably excited.

“Your dad can read that at the ceremony tonight!”

“I thought you said we can’t tell anyone yet?” Amoreena questioned her, like always.

“Your teacher can know, the other kids won't know what it means, it’s just important Spencer sees it, but we will wait to tell nanny and poppy, okay? Sometimes the babies don’t always stay, it’s sad so we keep it a secret until they’ve got a tiny little heartbeat in there,” she didn’t want to scare her, but she knew it was always a possibility.

“Then we try again,” Amoreena smiled, “It’ll be easier now that you don’t need Dr. Collins to help you, how did you even make me without Spencer?” She didn't use his real name often anymore, only in times when she wasn't referring to him as her father.

She sat down then, pulling Amoreena into her lap so she could hold her while she thought of the right words. “So we have eggs, but people with penises have something called sperm. When adults, and I mean adults you have to be at least 25 to have a baby it’s the rules,” she teased her slightly, ticking her arms.

“Adults have sex, babies are made when someone with a vagina and someone with a penis get together. But when you don’t have a partner with a penis to help, sometimes they’ll donate their sperm to the doctor's offices to help people like me make their perfect little families all by themselves.”

“Interesting,” is all her little mind can say, she has learned so much in one day, Y/N was surprised she was still listening and surprisingly still for once. “Is it a boy or a girl?”

“We won't know for a while,” she smiled, holding Amoreena closer to her chest. “How do you feel about all this?”

Amoreena was quiet as she thought about it, “is Spencer the guy who gave the doctors the sperm for me?”

“We think so, but we don’t know, why?”

Amoreena looked at her softly, “it wouldn’t be fair, I know he said I don’t need a father but why do they get to have him for both?”

“I think Spencer is your father, you’re just as smart and wonderful as he is, there’s no doubt in my mind that you’re his baby too. but if you want to know if he isn't, when you turn 18 the doctors will tell you who it is, it's completely up to you to find out,” she whispered, the tears starting to fall down her cheeks as Amoreena tried to wipe them away.

"I like thinking he's my father, so he is." Her mind worked in the most wonderful way. Y/N couldn’t help but hold her close as she lightly cried, “I had a dream yesterday that I had 8 sisters,” her voice was so soft and innocent as her tiny hand cupped her mother's cheek.

She gasped lightly at the words, remembering Spencer’s panic in the middle of the night last night, how scared he was to leave her all alone with 9 babies and no one to help her. They knew something that she didn’t yet, cheaper by the dozen seemed less like a dream and more like a prophecy.

“I’m so happy to make your dream come true,” Y/N whispered, “I promise I’m happy, the baby just makes me emotional.”

Amoreena placed her hand on her tummy then, “I love you, baby.”

Y/N stuck her tummy out as far as she could, “I love you too, big sister,” she said in a funny voice to make Amoreena laugh, leaning back in the chair as she held her.

And just like that, getting pregnant with Amoreena was bumped into 3rd place for the best day of her life. Sharing the moment with her and no one else was perfect, insuring she knew that she was just as important moving forward as the little person she was growing this time.

tag list: @shemarmooresfedora @spencers-dria @spookyspence @reidsfish @manuosorioh @mochionly @samuel-de-champagne-problems @jswessie187 let me know if you would like to be added as well!!

#spencer reid #spencer reid smut #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid fanfic #spencer reid imagine #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x y/n #spencer reid x you #spencer reid self insert #spencer reid request #criminal minds smut #criminal minds imagine #amoreena

[thesoundofanicefall]

Hello, I'm Sebastian. Again :))

Ever since I started reading manga and watching OnS anime I had a lot of questions but couldn't find the answers, sometimes I forgot what I was going to ask, but now I found you with your interesting theories. Thank you very much!

The question I want to ask you today is a thought that popped into my head right after I read chapter 107:

_Was what Guren and the others were doing already predicted by the First?

_How does Guren intend to resurrect all of humanity?

My wording is not good, so I may be a bit rambling, hope you still understand. Starting from 8 years ago, to revive 7 human lives (5 friends and 2 strangers as far as I remember) the price Guren had to pay was all human lives on the planet, now he say they want to resurrect all of humanity, so what's the price to pay for that? I wonder if Guren has thought about that. Also, in chapter 99 Guren suddenly appeared and said "I'm going to resurrect all of humanity" without saying how to do it, and everyone there believed and listened according to Guren's vague plan (which can be understood as now Yuu, Kimizuki, Yoichi and the others are all at a dead end and they have no hope but what Guren said). Okay let's say they turn Mika into Yuu's demon and then defeat Shikama Doji, what about after that? Nobody mentioned this... That's the first thing.

Now it's about Shikama Doji (Shika Madu), after reading chapter 107 it makes me wonder if Shika Madu knows the path of Guren and the others? I don't know when it started, but maybe from chapter 92 when Ferid said "every thing today is still dancing on the palm of the First's hand", I had doubts about this. And after chapter 107 when Shika Madu says "it's too soon for you to become Yuu'demon." (???) I mean, did the First intend to turn Mika into Yuu's demon from the start? And is it what Guren, Yuu and the others have been doing (Rigr Stafford betrayal, or letting himself be sealed again in chapters 85 and 86, Mika turning into a demon,...). Honestly after reading chapter 107 I feel like Guren and the others were led by Shika Madu in the first place. But now I don't know how to explain it more clearly so I'll stop here.

Thank you for reading this far. If you think my sentences are weird, it's because I'm not good at expressing myself and I used GG translate. Hope to receive your reply. Wish you have a good day.

Hello again Sebas chan! Sorry for the late response I was super busy yesterday and all so hope you'll understand this.

Ahhh! Glad you enjoyed my little blog dear and thanks for your trust to ask them of me!

So in order to answer your questions let me to start like this first:

1- Well we can say a part of what they were doing (like Mika turning to a demon) was also what Shikama wanted too eventually but not all of them as we saw how on 99 he was really scared of Shinoa and the gang all plus that his plan was about to destroy too

2- The fact is that we still know nothing about how and when exactly the resurrection is going to happen dear and so as for now we have no complete information then I generally advice everyone, like I was doing before, that without any exact information do not judge about it.

We totally don't know if these are other methods to do the resurrection other than the one 8 years ago (and sounds like there is other methods with what we saw on chapter 106 and what Noya said about that corpse resurrection) and so if there is the punishment may be different or even if there would be punishments in general or the fact that if Saito, Guren and Mahiru could find a way to stop the supposed punishment and all so you see now? We totally know nothing of this resurrection part of the plan so we better not to judge it and just patiently wait for more information first dear.

and finally to answer your 3rd question dear, I wrote a special theory about it long ago that I just share its link here again and refer you to that post to read as I really don't feel like to write all those words again hope you'll understand!

Here the link for that referred post which is the answer of your 3rd question fully:

So by all of these hope I could give you proper answers and you are satisfied by them too! And as I said before too don't worry about the languages or whatever English is not my first language too so there's no worries at all dear!

Have a nice day too thanks ^^

#a & q #icy answer #owari no seraph #seraph of the end #guren ichinose #ichinose guren #shikama doji #sikama du #hiiragi mahiru #mahiru hiiragi #hiragi mahiru #mahiru hiragi #saito #rigr stafford #hyakuya mikaela #mikaela hyakuya #hyakuya yuuichiro #yuuichiro hyakuya #hyakuya yuichiro #yuichiro hyakuya

[zambie-trashart]

I Don’t Own an IPhone: Wanna Trade? Chapter 2

Masterlist

Previous: “Oh. My. Rao!” Jon screamed in the lobby and his body trembled with panicked breaths as a hand found its way to his shoulder. Jon looked at the person attempting to comfort him and saw a girl with ombre hair, dark skin, and glasses. “Merci?” Jon said confused but sending the girl a grateful smile. Fuck you Murphy’s Law.

.......

Chapter 2: I Just Realized My Boyfriend is a Dick

“I speak english sweetheart, what seems to be the problem?” she asked.

“I think I- no I know I switched phones with someone back in America before getting on the plane and now they have my phone somewhere, probably looking through my messages, my pictures, oh Rao my pictures,” Jon said and another wave of panic spread through the teen and the girl chuckled slightly.

“What scared the poor person is gonna see some package they weren’t expecting?” she asked having the audacity to laugh.

“Yeah, my rich famous boyfriend’s,” Jon said shaking her by the shoulders and her face sombered up.

“Well, let’s see what we can do to get you your phone back, I’m Alya.”

“Jon Kent,” Jon said and Alya’s eyes widened.

“As in like Lois Lane’s son?” Alya asked smiling widely. “As in like dating Damian Wayne Jonathan Kent?” Alya asked smile growing bigger than the Joker’s. “I can see why you need that phone back now.”

“I was supposed to be meeting the owner of the phone’s friends here, you wouldn’t happen to be friends with a girl named Marinette right cause I mean your name is Alya and she mentioned....” Jon started and Alya laughed as a boy came over to join her.

“Nino you’re not going to believe this, Marinette traded phones with that stranger that we’re supposed to show around,” Alya said laughing so hard she was almost crying now and Nino joined in the giggles.

“This isn’t funny as much as I want to trust your friend, she has no idea what kind of stuff is on my phone… she doesn’t even know who I am,” Jon said shaking Alya’s shoulders.

“You know your own phone number right? Why not just call it from the phone as an emergency call, and I do know her password if that’s a problem,” Alya said trying to calm down the panicked teen. “Also I don’t think Mari would be the type to leak those kinds of things,” Alya said nudging Jon who rolled his eyes. There weren’t even any dick picks on his phone, more like mission statements that had the exact time and place he was supposed to meet the heroes and stuff that could totally compromise his identity. He just hoped that Damian put a password on it.

Marinette stared up at the ceiling as the phone next to her kept buzzing. She didn’t want to be rude and look especially since Jon wouldn’t do the same with her phone, at least she hoped not but whoever this was really needed to stop texting. She picked up the phone and the screen opened almost immediately. No password.

From Dami: Beloved have you landed yet? Jon are you ok? Did something happen? I knew this was a bad idea. Let me call my father and I’ll be over there right away. He said I couldn’t go, that we needed space but please text me back so I know you’re ok Jon.

Marinette felt guilty for what she was about to do but if it would soothe the boy of the other end’s nerves about sweet Jon for even a moment, she would do it.

To Dami: Nothing is wrong, I just landed.

Marinette texted back nervously and she shut the phone off feeling dirty for lying to her new friend’s boyfriend. It was wrong, so wrong. Marinette picked up the phone and started scrolling through the pictures app curiously. It couldn’t help to indirectly get to know her new friend through pictures.

From Dami: Good to hear beloved, I was getting worried, get some rest we can talk tomorrow.

Marinette clicked on the text gnawing on her bottom lip. Did Jon seem like the type to say I love you after all this? There were no previous texts so it was obviously a new phone with no backups saved.

To Dami: I’ll do that, love you.

She responded and the text was left on read. “What an asshole,” Marinette said to herself before clicking back on the pictures app a bunch of pictures of a white dog with various people filled most of his camera roll as she scrolled through. Pictures of people who must have been family based on the glasses and familiar face shape took up a bunch too but one picture stood out to her the most. It was a selfie taken by a masked teen pressing his lips up to Superboy’s. She dropped the phone on the ground. “Shit.”

Jon paced against the floors of Alya and Nino’s apartment nervously. 

“Dude calm down, we’ll get this all figured out ok?” Nino said and Jon nodded as Nino called his phone number again with no answer. 

“Oh my Rao that asshole,” Jon said suddenly and Alya looked offended.

“Listen I’m sure Marinette just doesn’t want to answer on a stranger’s phone or she’s asleep, no reason to name call,” Alya said offended.

“Not her, Damian, he must have changed the phone number after it got leaked last week, I was missing my phone then suddenly Damian gets me a new one, it all makes sense now and now I have no idea what the number is,” Jon said burying his head in his hands. “That also means that my old one is in Marinette’s but that won’t help either,” Jon said slumping, pushing the Iphone across the table roughly.

“Wait did you say boyfriend?” Nino asked after a moment.

“Is that a problem here, Marinette seemed ok with it and so did Alya so,” Jon started looking panicked not wanting to lose one of the two people who could help him through this hectic circumstance.

“No not at all, it’s just Mari and Adrien have been off their game lately, maybe you could pretend to text Adrien as Marinette but you know flirtier a you style, you guys are a lot alike,” Nino suggested and Alya smirked.

“More like twins, but he’s got a point, I’m sure Marinette would do the same in your situation,” Alya said and Jon picked up the phone seeing a text from a weird name: Chaton.

“Who the hell is Chaton?” Jon asked and Alya looked at Nino and panicked. 

“Um, Marinette thinks our resident hero Chat Noir looks a little like Adrien it’s just a joke they have going on,” Alya said and Jon shrugged before remembering.

“You guys have heroes here, I forgot about that, do they like patrol or something it might be nice to get a glimpse of them,” Jon said attempting to get the information that was supposed to be on his phone from the Parisians.

“Yeah, they’re normally out at night and thanks to the time change you might just be able to see them at some point,” Nino said smiling.

Jon looked back down at the phone smiling. Perfect.

From Chaton: I’ll miss you tonight, good luck in Gotham.  I’m also sorry about earlier, I should have been nicer to you about the whole leaving thing. Dad’s just been getting worse lately, he never has any time left. Not like he ever did before though.

Jon had no idea how to react. Nino looked uncomfortable reading over his shoulder and Alya sighed.

To Chaton: It’s ok, I forgive you, I’m a bit tired after the flight, I’ll text you tomorrow though, I love you.

Jon hit send and got hit with a read. Jerk.

Nino put a hand on his shoulder. “Let’s take you to your hotel and get you settled it,” Nino said and they left the comfort of the apartment. All Jon could think about was how bad he felt for poor Marinette.

taglist (open)

@jumpingjoy82 @liquid-luck-00 @megaafangirl @zorua-adorable @dreamykitty25 @pinkittwice @ghostdragonfang @ramos123 @redbullgivescaswings @jayjayspixiepop @sekhmet5 @blur-of-colours @roseisred  @nightlychaotic @ladybug-182 @novaloptr @prettylittlebutterflie @hammalammadamdam @niknak-3​ @certainmuffinbagelcalzone ​

#maribat #Jon Kent #marinette and adrien #alya and jon #marinette dupain cheng #miraculous ladybug #adrien agreste #adrijon #adrien x jon #adrien and marinette #damian x marinette #marinette x adrien #jonathan samuel kent #jon x damian #damian and jon #Nino lahiffe #alya cesaire #besties alya and jon #jason todd #he will be playing a big part here #next chapter tho #something to look forward to #fanfic #Super Sons #robin #Superboy #chat noir #ladybug #carapace #rena rouge

[itskatastrophe-x]

Far Off Places (CH 2)

Chapter 1 , Chapter 2 , Chapter 3

Word Count : 3,022

^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^

It took a few hours to wake up, but when you did, you sat up in a cold sweat, sharp pains shooting through your ribs, legs, and back. Almost three days of walking and running had taken a huge toll on your body. You scrunched your face in pain and shot a hand to your chest, noticing bandages around your arm and hand. That’s when you were very aware of your surroundings and two other figures in your peripheral. You looked at them in shock, their faces mirroring your same expression. You remembered the one with the wings just as you fell to the ground, but this second person you hadn’t seen. How many people were here, you wondered.

You tried to speak but your throat was raw and all that came out were raspy whispers and coughs. The one with wings looked at the taller one and motioned to a doorway. The taller one nodded and walked away swiftly, coming back seconds later with a bottle of water and another one full of a sparkling pink liquid. He handed you both of them and advised to drink the pink one first and wash it down with the water, explaining it was a health potion. You obliged and gulped it as fast as you could, almost gagging from the taste, and quickly chugged and swished the water after, feeling the effects almost instantly. You thanked them both and handed the bottles back to the boy and he took them back through the doorway, leaving you and the winged man alone. You fiddled with the bandages on your arms for a moment and cleared your throat a couple times before finally speaking.

“Where am I? Who are you? Thank you for the help.” The man lightly chuckled and took off his hat, his hair falling to frame his face. “My name is Philza, but you can call me Phil. The other one is Ranboo, he’s our friend that lives over by the mountain.” His voice had a very thick accent, unlike the boy, Ranboo. You nodded and he continued. “You’re outside of the Dream SMP. I live with Ranboo here with Technoblade. He goes by Techno. He’s currently asleep and we’re not sure when he’ll wake up. You’ve seen our dogs,” he chuckles out, drawing a smile onto your face. You scratch the back of your neck and heat makes its way to your face. “I’m sorry if I woke you. Your dogs made quite the ruckus.” He smiles fondly at you and waves you off. “Oh, don’t worry about it. We’re normally up around that time anyway. Days have been pretty restless lately, what with all the wars and such going on.”

He notices the worry on your face and goes on. “We tend to stay out of things. We’ve been involved too many times and we all like to keep things peaceful. These cabins are essentially a safe place. No one really knows where we live and we’d like to keep it that way. You aren’t here as a spy are you?” You shake your head and look down at your hands, bruises and cuts litter your body, but are slowly fading thanks to the potion from earlier. “No, I uh…” You clear your throat and steel yourself to speak more. “I… I travelled for three days to get here. My homeland was destroyed and I have nowhere to go.”

You look up at the man, the younger boy now standing next to him, staring at you in wonder and concern, the same concern seen in Phil’s eyes. “I’m still not sure how much I can trust anyone so I won’t say much more, but I lost my home and everyone I know. I’ve come a long way and I need somewhere safe. The person that murdered and burned my home could still be out there, and I need help. I know we’re strangers but I hope to trust you two more. You seem like nice people and, if you’re willing, I’d like to find some help some day to go back and figure out what happened.”

They both stare at you for a while until Phil smiles politely and nods. “Of course! Do you have a name you’d like us to call you?” You think for a minute, not being able to come up with a name to go by so as to keep your real name hidden. Ranboo speaks up a minute later. “We could call you Faer, if that’s ok. As a name it means Traveler.” You smile brightly at the small  name and nod. “I guess that fits, seeing as I am technically a traveler now. I didn’t do much of that back home, so sure, let’s go with that.” They both nod in unison. “Faer,” you say to yourself. A fitting name, short and sweet and it rolled off the tongue nicely. Maybe one day when you knew you could trust them you’d tell them your real name, but for now that nickname would do.

They gave you some supplies, a bed, and some armor and better clothes after you got some rest and pointed you to a good spot to set up your own little home. They also gave you a map of the surrounding areas and gave you a rundown of some of the people that lived in the main cities, but there were so many that you forgot half of them. Ranboo followed you out to pick a spot to settle down, idly chatting about how life was in the area, who to stay away from, where all the farms were, and just general stuff to pass the time. Eventually you ran out of wood so you both ventured into the woods to chop some more.

After a couple hours, your small abode was looking good. It wasn’t anything fancy or as big as Techno or Phil’s houses, but it did the job. All you had to do yet was finish putting walls up inside, decorating, and making it pretty outside. You added some fences to give yourself a front yard, placed torches to liven up the place, and also made a small deck out front facing the aforementioned houses. It took a couple more hours of work to get the inside done, but everything was done around sunset and you were ready to pass out. Phil came over close to the end and said Techno was awake and they would be over soon to welcome you in. You were grateful to have such a warm welcome, but you were still on edge. How well could you trust these people? Sure, they gave you plenty of things and were friendly, but it felt like they were hiding something or were keeping information away from you. The way they would shirk off certain questions or avoid subjects completely was weird. You assumed it was because they didn’t trust you either, so you shrugged it off. You were a stranger to them. A person that ended up passing out on their land, giving them no info on who you were or where you came from. You were lucky you ended up here, though. Hearing some of the stories Ranboo told you made you glad this was the closest on your journey.

Ranboo returned, after leaving to clean himself up, with some flowers, a diamond sword, and a couple emeralds to get you started. After chatting with him for a couple minutes you heard a knock on your front door, signaling the return of Phil. You hopped off of your seat and opened the door to greet him. He had a couple dishes of various kinds of foods piled into his arms, so you gladly took some from him. What you were not prepared for was Techno. You didn’t know what to expect, as Phil had given no description, but the tall half pig, half human standing behind the winged man with a disgruntled look on his face, flowing red cape, and glinting golden crown was absolutely something you weren’t expecting. I mean, you weren’t one to judge, you just had no clue what to expect. Phil walked past you and asked Ranboo for help setting everything up, leaving you with the large man. He gave you a huff and walked past you, cape gently hitting you in the shins as the wind from him walking pushed it out behind him. You stood there, slightly in shock with the door open, as he made himself at home in your new living room. You closed the door and turned around to see him with his head hanging off the back of the couch, eyes closed and arms crossed. He did just wake up, maybe he’s still tired.

The night was going well in your eyes. You and Ranboo were getting along well and you could see why he was saying Phil was very much like a powerful father figure. Techno joined in on some conversations occasionally when he thought he had something to say. You asked him some simple questions but he refused to answer anything. You chalked it up to him not trusting you at all so you let it slide and shrugged it off. Phil had nudged him or elbowed him a few times if he thought he was getting out of line, but you waved it off saying you weren’t bothered. Honestly you weren’t bothered. You had heard worse in your courts back at home, so little phased you at this point. Thinking about your home had apparently made you zone out, because you were brought back to real life when you heard your new name being called. Ranboo had shook your shoulder lightly, concern etched onto his and Phil’s faces, amusement and curiosity finally glinting in Techno’s eyes. You laughed lightly and put a hand to your face, feeling wetness on your cheeks. When had you started crying?

“Faer, are you ok? What’s wrong?” Ranboo’s hand retracted and he stared at you with intense focus, very clearly concerned. You looked down at your empty plate, long forgotten from the hours before during your conversations. You contemplated telling them the truth, second guessed yourself, then shook your head and covered your face with both hands, letting out a short sigh. You knew you would have to tell them eventually, and you supposed now was as good a time as any. You started off at your lineage, being born into a royal family, being sheltered since you were young, your training and lessons. Everything shortened into smaller stories to keep things simplified. Everything leading up to your parents inevitable deaths and you becoming the ruler of a whole kingdom.

Techno had perked at the words “royal family”, finally becoming invested in something and listening closely, asking questions every once in a while. Ranboo and Phil sat in shock as Techno had basically taken over the conversation, you pouring out details as he asked. You weren’t sure why exactly you were letting him get so much out of you, but all of them seemed to relax the more you talked about your past, until finally you reached the downfall of your oversized city. Ranboo had gotten more invested in this, and seemed to want to figure out how it happened as well. He said he was a fan of theories and small details that seemed to be hidden, so he agreed to helping you find the arsonist.

They asked for coordinates so you got up, grabbed all the plates to take them to the kitchen, found your journal, and brought it back to where everyone was sitting. Ranboo’s eyes lit up as he watched you flip through the pages and you caught onto his gaze and smiled. He opened his own bag and brought out a journal silently, smiling the whole time, mentioning how he kept his own journals. You made a mental note to try to ask about them at another point as he put his away. You finally flipped to the page holding info about your kingdom and pulled out a map from between the pages as well, flipping them to face Techno and Phil. They looked over everything and you watched intently as they pointed and flipped, exchanging words every few seconds.

“We can just make a portal,” Techno finally grunts out. “Most of our locations we stay in have portals to each and highways connecting to the main portal by the community house. The only thing we would worry about is having you out and about. Some of the people here… Aren’t so trustworthy.” You think back to your conversation with Ranboo and nod. “Yeah, Ranboo said something about an Egg? What’s that all about?” They all go quiet and you feel like you’ve asked the wrong question. “I’m assuming it’s nothing good, so I won’t press anymore, but if it’s unavoidable then you’ll have to tell me eventually.” Phil speaks up from his side of the table. “Well, all we should tell you now is to not touch the vines, and if you hear anything to let us know right away. Don’t trust any bad thoughts.” You were taken back by that but hesitantly croaked out an ‘ok’ and left it there.

You all spent the last hour together coming up with a plan to get you to your kingdom, what you could look for, and who else you might be able to trust. The date was decided to be set for a week from the present day and you would find two more people, Karl and Sapnap. Ranboo said you would get along well with them and they were people they knew could help that had a lot of knowledge. Karl was a master at problem solving and a time traveler (though he still didn’t know exactly how to control it and only used it when he had to), and Sapnap was born in fire so he knew it well, meaning he might be able to know something from the wreckage. After everything was said and done, you were waving goodbye as they all crossed the snow covered field to their separate homes.

You shut the door and sighed, leaning your back against the solid wood plank, your head also falling back to rest on it, eyes closing as you listened to your breathing and heartbeat. The gentle crackling from the fireplace and torches calmed your nerves more as you pushed off the door and made your way to the kitchen to extinguish some of the lights. After cleaning up and tidying everything, you looked over the living room once more and smiled to yourself, finding your way up the stairs and into your bathroom to wash off and get ready to sleep.

All this alone time gave you time to think about the plans, and the more you thought, the more you doubted this person named Sapnap. You were told he had some kind of fire ability, and seeing as most of your kingdom was set on fire, you didn’t think he was very trustworthy. No matter how far away this place was, he was still suspicious to you. I mean, what were you supposed to think when you got to a random location and on the first day upon arrival you were told that there was someone here with a fire ability? Were you just supposed to trust this stranger immediately, just like that? You didn’t like that thought at all, but you trusted Ranboo and Phil enough already that you figured you should give this Sapnap guy a chance.

And with those last few thoughts, you finished settling in to sleep, finally in a proper bed after three long days. The thick blanket and the flickering light of the last embers in the hearth helped you to drift off to sleep. You made a mental note to write in your journal when you wake up, since you were exhausted and could barely keep your eyes open.

Hot. Burning. Loud crashing. Your eyes snapped open and you were finally aware of your surroundings. Your kingdom around you, burning to the ground, craters dotted the ground. You were surrounded by fire. You screamed out in pain and searched for a safe way out. Why was this happening? No. You knew the answer, you just had to remember. Right? Right! Dreams. You could solve things using your dreams, being thrown back into the middle of situations to see what went wrong. To look over missed details. The only downside was the fact that all your senses still worked. It was like time travelling but without all the paradoxical consequences. Essentially just to play detective.

You ran through the blaze, trying to find a safe path while also looking for clues. There was nothing but destruction, burnt remains, and the smell of burning wood. You finally made it to a clearing where the plaza in front of the castle was, and there in the distance between all the red flames and black smoke, there was a flash of color. It was fast, so you almost missed it, but it was there. Who was that? With that thought alone, you were sprinting in the same direction, not caring about the flames that would kiss your skin or the ember covered logs that would catch your legs. You needed this lead, no matter what kind of pain you went through.

You spent what felt like hours running around. Your legs felt like they were being torn apart, your skin was burning and blistered in a lot of spots, and it was getting too hard to breathe. There was no sign of the green that you saw earlier, so you gave into your body and fell to the brick walkway under you, the rough texture stinging your skin. You closed your eyes, breathing heavily, hoping you would wake up soon. Then you heard it. The sound of feet on the pavement ahead of where you laid. Your body hurt as you lifted your head, vision going fuzzy and dark as the person neared. Green.

#dream #dream x reader #dream smp #dsmp #mcyt #ranboo #philza #technoblade #wilbur soot #lore #angst #x reader #reader insert #OC #OOC #AU #roleplay #fanfiction #fanfic #dsmp fanfic #dreamXD #c!dream #dream lore #prison break

[oumakokichi]

hello! could you talk a bit more about the original (as in jp, not localization) ouma's personality and speech patterns? you've mentioned that he tends to trail off or speak more softly when it is implied he is speaking the truth, etc. and how he is not so loud/intentionally obnoxious. //btw when does he call himself a fairy? that's so cute

I got a couple of questions asking about the fairy line Ouma has, so I don’t mind sort of rolling them both into one! And I’m more than happy to talk a little more in-depth about Ouma’s speech patterns and personality in the original game, too!

Since I’ll be covering some late-game spoilers, I’ll put the bulk of this under the cut, so be careful when reading!

First off, I cannot stress how much I recommed playing ndrv3 with the Japanese voices enabled. If you’ve already played through the English dub but never experiened the original voice acting cast, I promise you won’t be disappointed. The Japanese cast are all fantastic, incredibly talented VAs who, unlike the dub, were hired specifically for these roles and not just re-casted from previous DR games.

Hiro Shimono as Ouma gives an absolutely incredible performance. The localization might still have many flaws in its translation and omission of certain lines or punctuation, but you can still very much get a feel for how Ouma’s character was intended by listening to Shimono’s performance. Re-playing the game with the Japanese voices will definitely let you hear how soft and tonally different Shimono’s performance is in places from the English dub, and compare it to the way in which many lines are written and punctuated as if Ouma’s yelling at everyone.

That isn’t to say that Shimono’s Ouma is never loud or excited: Ouma is a character whose moods and façades are all over the place, and therefore his performance requires a voice actor who can similarly change moods and intonation on a dime. Ouma is very much loud and haughty and deliberately annoying when he’s supposed to be, but his voice is also low and ominous at other points when he’s trying to be scary. And again, it’s soft and hesitant in places where he’s considering divulging some of his information, or when he’s insisting that all the things he does are for everyone’s sake, because he cares about them and doesn’t want anyone to die.

These moments feel so much more genuine in the Japanese version of the game--because they’re meant to be. As fantastic of a liar as Ouma is, it’s much easier for us, the player, to tell when he’s lying on a re-play, knowing the information from chapters 5 and 6 that we do, and looking at cues like his sprites (often his blank-faced ones) and, yes, his delivery of certain lines.

This probably sounds like me just gushing about what a fantastic voice actor Hiro Shimono is, and in part that’s exactly what it is, but I want to stress that pretty much every single voice actor in the Japanese cast is just as fantastic and that they all do their jobs incredibly well. With all that gushing out of the way, I’ll move on to talking about some of Ouma’s actual speech tics and the way he refers to other characters.

Like most things about him, Ouma’s speech patterns are sort of an interesting mix and even seem a little contradictory at times. He uses the very masculine pronoun “ore” (オレ), but he also refers to nearly everyone (with only a handful of exceptions) by their surnames and the much more childish honorific “-chan” (i.e. “Saihara-chan,” “Akamatsu-chan,” “Amami-chan,” etc.)

The use of “-chan” is very interesting. Honorifics in Japan are extremely complicated and tend to mean different things depending on who is using them. Typically, “-chan” is seen as a very feminine way to refer to someone else, commonly used in close-knit friend groups among school girls.

There are, of course, a few notable exceptions to this however: often times, middle-aged or elderly people will call a child “-chan” regardless of gender, as a way of showing they find them cute and endearing. And sometimes, people will use “-chan” to refer to other things they find cute, such as pets, or even to refer to themselves in a sort of informal, tongue-in-cheek way.

The fact that Ouma uses “-chan” as an honorific to refer to nearly everyone in the game stands out quite a lot: by and large, boys don’t use this term to refer to other boys. Using “-chan” to refer to anyone you’ve just met or don’t know very well is already somewhat frowned upon, but a boy using it to refer to other boys is especially rare. This helps set Ouma’s character up as someone who is both incredibly casual and informal with others (not to mention, you know, quite coded). Considering childishness and lightheartedness are traits Ouma values, and how much emphasis is put on him having “a very innocent, childish streak that’s hard to hate,” it makes sense then that he would talk like this.

Not counting Monokuma and the Monokubs, the only characters who Ouma doesn’t refer to with “-chan” are Gonta and Kiibo, who he simply calls by name. This also says some interesting things about his character.

Gonta is easily the character who Ouma interacts with the most often, as well as the charater he hurts the most in the end. Ouma’s choice to exclude Gonta from his usual way of calling people is, I think, a testament to how much Gonta really wanted to be friends with him, even if their friendship was never exactly on equal footing.

Meanwhile with Kiibo, I feel the choice to exclude him from his usual way of addressing others is indicative of how much Ouma tried to remind himself that Kiibo “wasn’t human,” and therefore how suspicious he found his presence in the killing game. We know Ouma suspected Kiibo and likely even had an inkling of his role as the audience proxy/camera in the game, due to how Kiibo’s picture is one of the only others set aside on his whiteboard besides Saihara’s, with the word “weird” written next to it (he also clearly guessed about the cameras after Gonta’s line in chapter 2, as we see from how he commissioned Miu for the bug-vac).

Ouma clearly enjoys teasing Kiibo a lot, and their banter reads very much like a manzai comedy duo; I feel like Ouma often tried pushing himself to remember that Kiibo “wasn’t human” on purpose in order to not get too attached to him or too distracted from his goal of ending the killing game. I don’t think Ouma’s decision to exclude Kiibo from the way that he very particularly referred to most of the rest of the group was just an accident or a coincidence.

Honorifics aside, Ouma also refers to several characters in interesting ways. He often uses “daisuki na ___-chan” (大好きな) to refer to some of the other characters, a phrase which more or less equates to “my beloved.” He uses this phrase with Saihara more than any other character of the game, but there are a few other instances where he does use it with Amami, Momota, and (if I’m remembering correctly) Kaede. Pretty much every single instance where the localization put, “because I love you” or “because you’re my favorite” whenever Ouma was talking to Saihara was usually a point where he would specifically call him “my beloved Saihara-chan.”

In chapter 4 during the scene where Ouma is alone in the parlor of the VR world, he also specifically, exclusively refers to Saihara as “suki ni natta hito” (好きになった人), literally: “the person I fell in love with.” This line was changed in the localization to, “when there’s a person I like,” which is more or less literally correct--however, the phrase “suki ni natta” is much heavier and more loaded with explicitly romantic implications than “suki” would be on its own, as it’s often used in Japanese love songs and shoujo manga love confessions.

Worth noting in my opinion is the fact that this is the exact same phrasing Maki uses to describe her romantic feelings for Momota. Since Maki’s feelings for Momota are considered canonically confirmed because of this, Ouma’s feelings should be considered equally canon, but a lot of people don’t know this because, well, it’s sort of been lost in translation.

And now, on to the fairy line! Ouma calls himself a fairy in chapter 3, when he pops up in the middle of Saihara and Korekiyo’s discussion of the katana in Korekiyo’s lab. Full of enthusiasm, he decides to touch the sword and examine it for himself; Korekiyo starts to object, but Ouma interrupts and says:

“Come on, it’s not a big deal! I’m like a fairy, so it’ll be fine!”

I’ve always really loved this line and thought it was super adorable, both as a nod to how fairies aren’t supposed to be able to touch steel in most fae mythos, as well as the fact that fairies tend to also have a love for mischief and pranks and lies. The localization apparently didn’t like it so much though, because this line is simply changed to, “Come on, would I lie to you?” instead.

One final thing I can think of as far as Ouma’s speech tics go is that his laugh in Japanese is romanized as “nishishi” instead of “neeheehee,” as this is closer to the Japanese onomatopoeia for the sound horses make--but I actually don’t mind this localization change at all! “Neeheehee” definitely looks a lot closer to the word “neigh” and helps capture that horse joke in a way that I feel like western players can more easily understand.

All in all, while I still definitely feel people can like and enjoy Ouma’s character from playing the localization alone, I still stand by my opinion that listening to the original Japanese voices helps give a much better picture of how the character was intended to come across, and really shows how much depth Hiro Shimono put into his performance. He’s quoted in the official ndrv3 artbook as saying that he believes Ouma is someone who’s actually “really meek if you take away his strong wish to outwit everyone” (credit to @kaibutsushidousha for the art book translation), and I think this interpretation of Ouma really shows through in so many of his lines.

Thank you both for the really fun questions! I hope I could provide some more interesting information about Ouma and the translation!

#danganronpa #kokichi ouma #ouma kokichi #new danganronpa v3 #ndrv3 #ndrv3 spoilers // #ask #my meta

[mypoisonedvine]

Love, Theoretically | Sebastian Stan x reader (Chapter 2)

read Chapter 1 here

series summary: having lost your husband, sister, and best friend all to the same extramarital affair, you ran away to a secluded villa in the Hungarian countryside to write and get a little time away from the life you’d left behind.  you were only looking for peace and perhaps some inspiration for your novel, but instead you found an unlikely connection with the immigrant repairman– even though the two of you don’t speak the same language.

word count: 2.3k (exactly the same as last chapter, i’m proud of myself lol)

warnings: just fluff and ~pining~ for now

thanks again to @evnscvll for making this moodboard-- and this series is for her 3k celebration challenge so def check out her writing!

You should’ve known that you wouldn’t be able to force yourself to write, but after a quick shower to wash off the day’s journey, you decided there was nothing better to do but sit at the desk and hope for inspiration.

Your husband had never been very supportive of your writing, which is why you had struggled to complete your latest novel.  He, like your publisher and many of your readers, wanted a sequel to your last book, in spite of the fact that you were adamant it was impossible.  It was a complete story, even if the ending was ambiguous.  There was no room for growth in the characters or the world of the story; just because readers wanted more didn’t mean that they would actually enjoy a forced product.

The publisher and your husband, however, shared a very strong opinion: the fans won’t care if it’s forced, and neither should you as long as it sells.  But, they weren’t writers.  You were.  And you knew there were different stories you needed to tell… if only you could find the words for them.

You were a few pages in when you heard the stairs creaking outside your closed door.  There was a quick knock at the door; you answered with an offer to come in.  

“I was just wondering if you wanted some coffee,” Mrs. Alberti explained as she crossed the room, standing beside you at the desk.  You nodded with a quick thank you as she set the cup and saucer down onto the wood.  “Oh heavens, he’s working on the house again,” she suddenly groaned, motioning out the window.  

You leaned over and nearly spit out your coffee when you saw Sebastian outside.  He was only wearing some much-too-tight jeans, driving a hammer down onto wood as the sun cast orange light over his body.  He was glistening with sweat, which was probably pretty uncomfortable for him but he looked damn good anyways.  

“Is he always… like that?” you shuddered.  

“Maybe I didn’t just hire him because he was cheap,” she shrugged, handing you a cloth.  “Go soak this in cold water and bring it to him, he looks overheated.”

You should’ve questioned why she was giving you chores, but you just took the rag and did as she asked.  He didn’t notice you walking out to him at first, but stopped when he did see you, waving quickly and setting down his hammer.

“For the heat,” you explained as you handed it to him.

“Ah, mulțumesc,” he nodded, accepting the rag with a smile.  

As he wiped the sweat from his face, you found your gaze trailing over his arms, down his chest and abdomen.  Jesus, how could this guy eat Mrs. Alberti’s cooking every day and still have washboard abs?  When you looked back up to his face, he was looking right at you with a grin-- oh shit, had he caught you ogling?  But then again, maybe he wanted you to ogle.  Why else would he be doing housework so… shirtlessly?

“Wh-what are you working on?” you asked him to break the silence.  He gave you a puzzled look.  “Er, the wood,” you motioned to the work he was doing, “why?”

His face softened with understanding.  “Construiesc un cadru nou pentru fereastră,” he explained, motioning vaguely to the house, “în partea de est a casei.”

“Right…” you nodded, realizing that you had no idea what he’d said.  Clearly you hadn’t thought this through.

“Aici, permiteți-mi să vă arăt,” he said, grabbing a board and walking past you, motioning for you to follow him as he slung the rag over his shoulder.  You figured you looked like a lost puppy trailing behind him like this.

He stopped when you reached the wall of the house, and grabbed part of the window frame; it creaked and moved as he wiggled it, clearly on the verge of falling off.  Then, he held up the new board he had been hammering and you realized that it was going to replace the rotting portions of the frame.

“A intelege?” he smiled.

“Da!” you answered, and he laughed.

“Cred că asta contează ca român,” he shrugged.

“It’s good you’re fixing the window.  I’m sure Mrs. Alberti appreciates everything you do.”

“Bătrâna îmi plătește rahat, dar sfârșesc trăind aici gratis.”

“Well, I should let you get back to it,” you decided as you stepped back with an uncomfortable smile.

“Nu te voi mai ține, sunt sigur că ești ocupat,” he said, and though you had no real way to interpret it, his tone didn’t seem to indicate that he was trying to stop you from going.

With a little wave and a heavy sense of god why am I such a dork?, you left him and returned indoors.

First nights in new places were always sort of surreal, but this was definitely less weird than the sleeper car of the train.  You’d felt like a proper stowaway then, but you had a stronger feeling of belonging here… even if you didn’t quite feel like you had any place to call home at the moment.

As you laid in bed and looked at the room turned on its side, you found yourself missing your room.  Your real room.  It had been designed and decorated somewhat meticulously, but most of all you missed the things about it that you hadn’t put that kind of thought into: the random earrings on your bedside table, discarded casually before you went to sleep; the layers of blazers and skirts draped over the chair in the corner; the still-slightly-visible coffee stain on the corner of the rug, even though you’d spent hours trying to get it out.

Meanwhile, this room was so obviously not a space that people lived in, but just a space people passed through.  Though nowhere near as sterile as a traditional hotel room, it had the same emptiness even with its personality-- specifically, a reflection of someone else’s personality rather than your own.

All that said, sleeping was pretty easy once you got yourself comfortable in the fluffy mattress, even if you were aware all through the night that you were not at home.  So aware, even, that you weren’t surprised at all when you woke up in the new space for the first time.  What you were surprised by was the sounds of heavy rain against your window, immediately dashing your plans for a morning jog.  As much as it seemed apropos to type by the window instead and soak in the moody weather, you decided to head downstairs for a cup of coffee first.  Already having forgotten where you had left off, you grabbed the pages you'd already written to reread with your breakfast as you slipped on some comfortable clothes and made your way down the creaky steps

Passing through the living area, it was impossible not to notice Sebastian sitting in one of the chairs, staring intently at a half-played chessboard.  Stopping for a moment to try to determine what he was doing, he moved a piece and you realized he must be playing with himself.

Against himself, you interrupted your own thought, he's playing against himself… important distinction.

“You play chess?” you asked, pointing to the board.

“Şah,” he replied.  

You pointed to the chair across from him.  “Can I join you?” 

“Luaţi loc,” he offered as he gestured to it as well, nodding in approval.  You smiled and sat down as he reorganized the pieces back to the starting position.

“Negru?” he asked, pointing to the black pieces-- “Sau alb?”-- he pointed to the white.

“Um, black,” you decided, pointing to them since they were already on your side anyways.

“Tu primul,” he prompted you, and you moved your pawn.  He moved his, and after that, it was long stretches of silence between moves.  It didn’t feel awkward anymore, though; even between two people who share a language, chess is usually a silent affair.

“Check,” you announced as your bishop came into range of his king.  He looked up from the board and gave you a puzzled look.  “The bishop, see?” you demonstrated, tracing a line through the air over the diagonal squares which led from your piece to his.

“Ahh,” he nodded, stroking his chin as he considered his next move.  It called additional attention to the shadow of stubble which dusted over his jaw.  

He maneuvred a rook in the path of your bishop, and you settled back into your chair and you pondered your options.

The next hour went by oddly quickly.  Not in a rushed way, just in a way that made you wonder how it had already been an hour.  

“Şah,” he informed you as his knight threatened your king.  You weren’t sure if it was supposed to mean ‘check’ or ‘checkmate,’ but since you were able to capture his knight with a pawn, it was definitely just a check.

Instead of mourning his knight, he grinned and moved a rook forward, capturing the aforementioned pawn and trapping your king for good.  You gasped a little as you realized you’d fallen right into his trap.

“Şah-Mat,” he declared triumphantly.  That definitely meant ‘checkmate’; you could tell by the smug look on his face as he crossed his arms and leaned back into his chair.

“You got me, man, that was sneaky,” you smiled.  Offering your hand for a shake, you looked up at him: “Good game.”

He grabbed your hand and shook it, squeezing just tight enough that you wondered if you were the only one noticing a certain energy to the air.  “Bun joc,” he replied with a nod and a smile.

He let go of your hand after lingering just a little too long, his fingers brushing over yours for an electric moment.

Now the silence was awkward again, as the two of you sat in the high-backed chairs, staring across the table at each other.

“So, you really don’t speak any English at all, huh?” you considered aloud.  He looked back at you vacantly.  “English?  Even one word?” you lifted one finger as a symbol.

“Halloo,” he replied-- apparently a broken attempt at ‘hello.’  You laughed a little.

“Yes, that counts!  Did you learn any English in school?”

“Televiziune,” he replied.  

“Ah yes,” you nodded, “I know what that is.  Television; I’m a big fan myself.”

“Puteți vorbi un singur cuvânt de limba română?” he asked you, raising one finger as well.  Turnabout is fair play, after all.

“You mean other than ‘da’?  Or ‘salut’?” you asked with a laugh.

“Pentru a fi corect, acestea sunt cuvinte,” he shrugged.

“Teach me,” you requested.  “Just one word.”  

You looked around the room, settling on a lamp.  “What is this?  In Romanian-- română?” 

“Lampă,” he replied.

“Okay, well, that one isn’t very exciting,” you frowned.  “Um, what about this?” you bent down from your chair, picking up one corner of the rug.

“Covor,” he answered, leaning down with you to run his hand over the soft shag.

“Covor,” you repeated, surely butchering it.

“Da,” he smiled.  Okay, maybe you didn’t butcher it so bad, or maybe he was just being nice.  

“Can you teach me more?” you asked, hoping it wasn’t too demanding.

“Uhhh,” he stalled, looking around the room.  Finally, he pointed to the fireplace.  “Vatră.”

“Vatră, fireplace,” you tried to memorize it as he said it.

You pointed to the window.  “What’s the window called?”

“Fereastră.”

You pointed to the stairway.  “Scară,” he informed you, smiling a little.  You hoped this wasn’t boring for him, because you were actually having a bit of fun.

You pointed to his feet.  He furrowed his brow a little and lifted one, grabbing his shoe.  You nodded; “Pantof,” he explained.

You grabbed your blouse and shook it a little, appreciating the puffs of cool air that rolled down your chest;  “Bluză.”

You pointed to him; “Sebastian.”

You already knew that, but it was interesting to hear the way he said it versus Mrs. Alberti’s pronunciation.  “Yes, that’s an English name too,” you told him, “but pronounced differently…”

You wondered if your name had another pronunciation or translation, so you pointed to yourself; “Frumoasă,” he said, a little slower, a little more thoughtfully.

“Is that the Romanian equivalent to my name-- or does it mean ‘woman’?” you asked.  He just smiled vacantly.  

“This,” you pointed to the book, “what is this called?”

“Carte,” he answered.  “Engleză?”

“Book,” you replied.

“...book…” he said slowly, contemplatively.

Suddenly inspired, you grabbed the loose pages of manuscript that you’d laid on the small table beside you.  “Book,” you repeated, flipping through the pages.  He seemed confused.  “My book,” you clarified, pointing back and forth from yourself the papers.  “I’m writing this-- that’s why I’m here.”

“Ah!” his face lit up with recognition.  “Ar trebui să scrii o carte!”

“Yeah,” you nodded.  “I’m a writer; or, I’m trying to be.  My last book did… better than my first, at least.”  

“Ce fel de carte este?” he asked.  You looked at him with confusion to indicate you weren’t sure what he was asking.  “Uhh, book… este--” he made a sad face, rubbing under his eyes like a cartoon character’s weeping-- “sau--” he fake-laughed.

You laughed, actually, at his charades.  “It’s a thriller, it’s crime--” you thought for a moment, then made the motion of stabbing someone with a knife. 

His eyes got wider.  “Este… erotic?” 

You choked a little, realizing that your hand movement was… more ambiguous than you originally intended.  “No!” you blurted out suddenly.  “No, it’s… crime, mystery--” 

You looked around and saw a magnifying glass resting on the side table by your chair; grabbing it, you held it to your face and gave your best quizzical look.

“Oh!  Crimă!” he grinned.  “Detectiv?”

“Yes, yes, there’s a detective,” you sighed satisfactorily, “and absolutely no handjobs.”

~

shamelessly tagging the people who liked chapter 1!  @mariahthelioness29 @navybrat817 @navegandoaciegas @mandalorianspace @2smittinkittin @maizyistrash @honeygingergemini​ 

#sebastian stan x reader #sebastian stan x y/n #sebastian stan fluff #sebastian stan x you #sebastian stan fic

[whenisitenoughtrees]

to be honest, capable (of holding you) (part 2/3)

He walks forward, crouching over the snake, and when it doesn’t stir at all, he works up his courage and pokes it, just a little. Its scales are warm and smooth under his fingertip, and he resists the urge to stroke them. He doubts he could get away with that.

“Janus?” he asks, trying to keep the somewhat hysterical laughter from his voice. “That you?”

Thomas didn’t know that Janus could turn into an actual snake, but he’s glad to hang out with him regardless. More than glad; ecstatic, even, because he’s been trying to figure out how to befriend him for ages, and this seems like a good first step. What he can’t figure out is why human-Janus is being so weird about it.

(Alternatively: Janus doesn’t trust easily. He wishes he could stop trusting Thomas— it would be so much less terrifying.)

Chapter Warnings: blood and injury, Remus being mildly unsettling

Chapter Word Count: 5,074

Pairing: platonic Thomceit

(part 1) (part 3)

(masterpost w/ ao3 links)

They don’t talk about it.

Thomas would very much like to talk about it. But whenever he goes to bring it up, Janus glares at him in a way that promises a world of trouble if he so much as breathes a word, and Thomas really does not want to set back any of the progress he’s already made with him, so he shuts up about it. He’s not entirely sure why Janus is so opposed to addressing it; it can’t be that he doesn’t want the others to know, after all, because all the others are literally parts of Thomas and as such are privy to the knowledge of everything that Thomas experiences.

As best as Thomas can tell, it’s some sort of embarrassment that holds Janus back, some sort of shame, and Thomas doesn’t get it. Surely he knows that Thomas doesn’t mind at all, that Thomas enjoys the time they spend together, even if their conversations are far more one-sided than he would like. Janus seems to be under the impression that coming to him at all is in some way unseemly, while Thomas just wants him to be comfortable enough to approach him as a human.

But as more time passes, that seems less and less likely. Thomas spends far more time with snake-Janus than with human-Janus, and Janus begins to come with him even when the sun shines bright and his spot by the window is available. Thomas becomes quite familiar with carrying a weight looped around his neck, and wishes he could puzzle out why Janus is acting this way.

The worst part is that with every passing day, he feels like he understands Janus less, not more. Because the way he acts during meetings and discussions, when he pops in to offer opinions and advice masked as sarcasm and cutting quips, is entirely different to the way he acts as a snake, when he and Thomas are alone together, when he leans into all the contact Thomas has to offer, seeking warmth, and, Thomas suspects, company. It’s almost as if he’s dealing with two entirely different people, each one unwilling or unable to discuss the other, and frankly, Thomas has no idea what to do about it.

Because he’s worried that if he pushes too hard, demands one answer too many, Janus will stop approaching him at all, in any form. And that is the last thing he wants.

So, he leaves it be, and resigns himself to the idea that human-Janus may just remain incomprehensible to him, and that snake-Janus is the closest he will get to making a friend out of him. And if that turns out to be the case, then gosh darn it, he will be the best friend to snake-Janus that he possibly can be.

This has the side effect of leading him to a snake-centric fact-finding mission, which Logan appreciates, at least, because “even if the information may not be applicable to most aspects of your life, at least you’re learning something, Thomas.” Which he supposes is fair. He learns a great many things about snakes over the course of a few days, most of it interesting, if not particularly relevant. He doesn’t know how much of this actually applies to Janus, since he’s not a real snake.

Though he does find out that snakes don’t have eyelids. That would explain the whole no-blinking thing.

Other than his impromptu investigations, they fall into an equilibrium fairly easily. Janus will seek him out at all hours of the day and wrap himself around his arm or neck, sometimes staying awake and aware and sometimes drifting off into sleep. And when he’s fed up with the company, he leaves, disappearing with neither warning nor fanfare. Thomas settles into this new routine with little effort, and decides that if this is all he’s going to get from Janus, he’ll take it.

He gets used to it, so much so that he stops looking every time he feels Janus curl around him. This turns out to be a mistake.

He’s procrastinating, as per usual. His deadline is a full week away, and even Virgil has been unable to provide the urgency that Thomas needs to push through and finish his latest project. He knows that this will only end badly, that he’s going to end up staying up until the early hours of the morning in a few days if he doesn’t get started now, but he simply doesn’t feel like it. So, he’s scrolling through Amazon instead, clicking through pages of items that he neither needs nor particularly wants.

He’s been looking at a lot of frogs, lately. Cute, decorative frogs, the kinds that sit on mantles and don’t do much of anything. And plushies, too, and those are actually tempting. He’s pretty sure that it’s Patton’s influence.

“What do you think?” he asks, holding up his arm so that Janus can see the screen. Janus hisses quietly, and he laughs. “Yeah, I didn’t think so.” He doesn’t have the money to spend on a bunch of decorative frogs, even if he had a strong inclination toward doing so, but it’s fun to look. He’s seriously considering a stuffed animal, but he’s pretty sure that Logan intends to talk him down from that, so there’s no real need to be concerned about it. Even if he ends up buying one after all, he thinks it would be worth it.

He glances down at Janus, trying to figure out if he’s enjoying this at all, or if he’s just irritated. And that’s when he finally notices the blood.

He freezes up, his muscles tensing, and blinks hard, hoping that it’s a trick of the light, or that spending so many hours doing practically nothing has fried his brain at last. But no; Janus’ scales are dotted with rusty red, and Thomas traces the blood back to a long gash trailing down his side, sluggishly oozing, slowly dripping onto his arm. He stares for a long moment, his mind stalling, and he wonders if the scent of iron flooding his nose is real or imaginary. Or rather, real by a certain standard, since everything to do with his sides is technically imaginary, but oh god, why is he bleeding so much? He thought that his sides could wave off injuries, that nothing could truly affect them unless they wanted it to? Or is that just Logan? And then there’s the question of what did this to him in the first place, and how exactly he’s supposed to treat someone who’s a figment of his imagination, and whether or not any of the real medical supplies he has would work at all—

Focus, Thomas.

It’s like a whisper in his ear, gentle and firm. Logan’s voice. The world snaps into sharp clarity, mind and adrenaline working in tandem.

“Oh my god,” he says, and Janus’ head swivels to face him. The movement is slow, almost lethargic, as if he’s operating on a time delay. “You’re hurt. Okay. Well, not okay. But you’ll be okay.”

He has a first aid kit in the bathroom. He has no idea whether that will help or not, but he won’t know until he tries, as his logic helpfully points out. So the first order of business is to get to the bathroom. He stands, setting his laptop to the side, trying to jostle Janus as little as possible. Now that he’s paying attention, more and more details filter in; Janus’ grip on his arm is looser than usual, his eyes dull and glazed. His hat, usually so perfectly placed, is just slightly askew.

He makes it to the bathroom in short order, yanking the kit out from under the sink and nearly spilling its contents across the floor. He’ll need both hands for this, and he looks to Janus with no small amount of trepidation, wondering how well he’ll take being moved. He doesn’t want to cause him more pain than necessary, and he doesn’t know how aware he currently is, doesn’t know if he’ll lash out if he feels threatened. He gives him an experimental nudge, prodding at him with one finger, and Janus hisses, shifting his coils to hold on tighter.

“C’mon,” Thomas says. “You gotta let me help you, buddy.”

There is is again: buddy. He still doesn’t think it fits quite right, but it seems to slip out anyway, and now is hardly the time to worry about it, not when Janus still shows no sign of budging.

“Please, Janus,” he says, dangerously close to begging. “I promise, I’m not gonna let anything else happen to you, but you need to let me see where you’re hurt.”

Janus’ tongue flickers out, tasting the air, and his eyes seem to focus just a bit. One minute passes, and then another, and Thomas is about to try to remove him by force when finally, he lets go, slithering onto the counter, his motions hesitant and pained, softly hissing all the while. Blood begins to drip onto the sink, the sickening red smearing across the countertop.

“Thank you,” Thomas says, not bothering to hide his relief. “Okay, um, I’ve got bandages. And painkillers, if you want them… can snakes take painkillers?” He sets things out as he names them, slowing as he hits a snag. Not only does he not know if snakes can take painkillers, but he also doesn’t know if there are any other substances in here that would do more harm than good, or if there are any special steps he should take due to his scales, or the fact that he’s cold-blooded. In fact, he has absolutely no idea how to treat a snake, and the idea that he might end up making things worse is enough to send his anxiety ratcheting up a few notches.

Is he overthinking this? He might be overthinking this. But what if he’s not?

Try to remain calm. If you don’t know enough to work within this situation, change the situation.

Logan again, though he’s not sure how that’s supposed to help. He would change the situation if he could— heck, that’s what he’s trying to do— but if it were so simple as wishing this whole scenario away, he would have done it by now. He’s not sure how to—

Oh, wait. Change the situation, or change Janus’ situation?

He has absolutely no idea how to treat a snake. But Janus doesn’t have to be a snake.

He crouches down so that he’s on eye level with Janus, who is limp and unmoving on the sink counter, tracking his motions with clouded eyes. It’s not just the large gash, he realizes; that’s the worst of it, but there are several shallower cuts, all still open and bleeding, and he swallows hard.

“Okay, so, I don’t want to make things any worse,” he says, keeping his voice low. “Do you think you could turn back into a human for me? Just so that I know what I’m doing?”

Not that he knows much about treating humans either, but at least he’d know where to start. Perhaps if Janus’ injuries were less severe, he could work with them in this state, but that prominent gash looks deep and angry, probably about six inches long, wide and painful, rending scales apart and leaking dark blood and god, he is so afraid of making this worse—

Janus stares at him, and doesn’t react.

“I’m sorry,” Thomas says, because he is. He doesn’t know why Janus only initiates contact with him as a snake, doesn’t know why the very idea of deviating from that seems to disquiet him. Asking him to be human now, like this, almost seems wrong, like they’ll be breaking what understanding they do have between them, breaking the peace they’ve found with each other lately. But then, the peace is already broken, he thinks, has been broken since Janus showed up bleeding. “I know you probably don’t want to. But I want to make this better, and I don’t think I can if you’re uh, shaped like this. I… I guess I’m asking you to trust me.”

It’s a tall order, and he is well aware of that. Janus is Deceit, after all, and Deceit is practically the antithesis of trust. He’ll probably have to work with Janus as a snake after all, and he’s just resolving himself to do the best he can when Janus shifts in place, raising his head.

Thomas isn’t sure how to process what happens next. One part of his brain tells him that the change happens slowly, that Janus’ form stretches and morphs in impossible ways, scales fading away and features rearranging before his eyes. The other part of his brain insists that the shift is instantaneous, that it happens as quickly as blinking, that in one moment, there is a snake curled on the counter and in the next, there is a man, with no gradual transition between the two. But however it happens, Janus now sits in front of him, arms and legs all present, hunched in on himself and wheezing. One hand flies to his side, clutching at his shirt.

Thomas blinks. For a second, his mind fights with itself, trying to decide on what, exactly, he just watched. Then, he decides that it doesn’t matter, that he’ll have a crisis about it later, and that there are more important things to concentrate on.

He reaches out, placing a steadying hand on Janus’ shoulder. “Easy, easy,” he says, raising his voice to be audible over Janus’ gasps. “Are you okay?”

It takes a minute for Janus to get his breathing under control, and when he does, he looks up at Thomas, his expression pinched. “Just fine,” he rasps. “Absolutely perfect, can’t you tell?” His voice is strained, tension showing in the lines around his eyes and in the thin set of his mouth. “Really, Thomas, the fuss is hardly necessary. I—” He cuts off with a slight gasp, eyes squeezing shut, and Thomas feels his heart clench.

“Hm, yeah, no, I think I’ve got the right to fuss a little bit,” he says, hoping his voice stays level. He looks him up and down, searching for the injury, and finds nothing; his shirt appears immaculate, his whole outfit as perfectly assembled as usual, not a rip or tear in sight. If it weren’t for the pain on his face, the tremors wracking his frame, Thomas wouldn’t suspect that he was injured at all, and he frowns. “Can you, uh—” He gestures— “take off your shirt, maybe? So I can see where you’re hurt?”

Janus sighs heavily, as though the request has greatly burdened him. He waves one hand in the air, and his shirt and capelet vanish, revealing his bare torso. Under any other circumstance, Thomas might be fascinated by the scales that trail all along his chest and left arm, but right now, his attention centers on the gash bloodying his side, and the thinner scratches that cover him. They all look bigger than they were before, more serious, and he hopes that he didn’t make the wrong decision in requesting him to shift. If it had been a bad idea, he would have refused, right?

“God, Janus,” he says. “What happened?”

Janus sighs again, rolling his eyes. “A mishap in the Imagination,” he says. “Unfortunately, both Roman and Remus designed the place so that its effects stick around even after leaving.”

… Alright. That’s probably something to talk about later; he doesn’t particularly like the reminder that he has no idea how most of the mindscape works. “But I thought you could heal yourselves?” he can’t help but ask. He vividly remembers the day he met Remus, the way that none of his attacks seemed to affect Logan for more than a few seconds.

“We all can, to some degree,” Janus agrees. “It’s more difficult for some of us than it is for others.” He hesitates, and the next words come out slow and almost defensive. “I am capable of it, if I succeed in persuading myself that the problem doesn’t exist in the first place, but in order to do so, I need to sufficiently distance myself from any negative sensations that accompany the harm. I am… currently finding that difficult.” He glares. “I’ll mange perfectly well, given time. There is no need for any of this.” He waves an arm to punctuate the declaration, and it might have been somewhat convincing if it weren’t for the fact that he immediately curls in on himself, face paling, like he’s pulled something the wrong way.

“Yeah, okay,” he says. “Well, how about you let me help you anyway, just for my peace of mind?”

Janus stares at him for a long moment, face unreadable. Finally, he glances away. “Do what you wish,” he says. “If you want to waste time on this, be my guest.”

He hums noncommittally, already inspecting the wound. “I don’t think that taking care of you is a waste of time,” he says, fishing through the first aid kit. He comes up with a bottle of extra-strength Tylenol, looking up just in time to see what can only be an expression of shock fade from Janus’ face, and god, what must he be doing wrong if that is Janus’ reaction to being told that he cares about him? He can’t unpack that right now, or else he might cry, so he holds out the Tylenol instead. “Painkillers?”

Janus nods slightly, and takes two dry. From there, Thomas works in silence, cleaning the wounds as best he can and bandaging them. It takes longer than he expects, and he debates whether or not the long gash will need stitches. He decides not to make the attempt, trusting that what Janus says is true and that he will be able to heal before too long. So he wraps bandages around his torso, and Janus, for his part, remains perfectly still, staring straight ahead, an occasional soft hiss the only thing that betrays his discomfort.

“Okay,” he says quietly, inspecting his handiwork. “I think that’s the best I can do.”

Janus shoots him an unreadable look. “In that case,” he says, “I believe I’ll be going now.”

He hops down from the counter before Thomas can stop him, and his face crumples like a wet sheet of paper. Thomas catches him as his knees give out, hooking his hands under his arms. He is surprisingly light, his skin cool to the touch.

“How about we don’t do that, actually,” he says. “I’ll tell you what, let’s go to my room, and I can work and you can get some rest?”

Janus hisses, trying to jerk away. It’s not difficult to prevent him from doing so; he has all the strength of a floppy pool noodle. “Oh yes, because I’m in dire need of a babysitter,” he spits out, and perhaps Thomas should feel intimidated, but looking at him, at the way all the color has drained from his face, at the way his eyes have glazed over even as they dart around the bathroom, all Thomas can muster up is a deep worry.

“I’m not trying to babysit you,” he says. “Believe me, I know that you of all people don’t need babysitting. But if you try to sink out now, I’m just gonna be stressed out, so if you’d stick around for a little bit, I would really appreciate it.”

Janus stills. The silence stretches on.

“Fine,” Janus says. “Sure. Whatever.”

Thomas restrains himself from letting out a sigh of relief, instead adjusting his grip on Janus until he is only supporting part of his weight. From the look on his face, Janus wants very much to grumble about the indignity of the situation, but miraculously, he remains quiet all the way to Thomas’ room, though he begins to drag his feet when he sees what Thomas intends.

“If you want me to rest,” he says, “I am perfectly capable of doing so in my own room. There’s hardly a need for me to take up space in your bed.”

“Okay,” Thomas says, lowering him to sit on the bedsheets and doing his level best to ignore his glare, “but then I won’t know that you’re alright. Also, I don’t see what the big deal is? It’s not like we haven’t done this before. You were just, uh, snakier.”

He knows immediately that it is the wrong thing to say. Janus’ face sets into an impassive wall, and he looks away, refusing to make eye contact. Thomas can’t tell what he’s feeling, whether it’s anger or embarrassment or frustration or some stubborn combination of the three. But he settles himself against the headboard without further argument, seemingly determined not to carry on any further conversation, so Thomas resigns himself to the silent treatment and sets up with his laptop on the other side of the bed, several inches placed between them.

The atmosphere is awkward, heavy. They both know that Thomas wants to talk, and they both know that Janus will not reply, or if he does, it will be with sharp sarcasm or otherwise cutting words, an answer that will not answer anything at all. So Thomas doesn’t say anything, merely glances over every now and again to be sure that Janus is still there, is still fine, is still breathing. Every time, he is greeted with the same sight: Janus staring off into the empty space in front of him, face blank, a faint tightness around his eyes the only indication that he is still in pain. There is a wall between them, invisible yet insurmountable, and Thomas has no idea how to breach it.

Why does their relationship feel so off-kilter now? Why are things so natural between them when Janus is a snake, small and speechless and cuddly, and not when he is a human?

“I don’t mean to force you to stay,” he murmurs. “If you’re really that uncomfortable, it’s alright if you leave.”

He’s watching him out of the corner of his eye, and as such, he sees the wince, slight though it may be.

“It’s… not that,” Janus admits. “I am grateful for your concern, truly. I just… so love being in unfamiliar territory.” His voice is a quiet drawl, but laced with exhaustion, his words just shy of slurred together.

He takes a second to parse through the words, and then smiles. “Well, that makes two of us,” he says. “I’d be alright with muddling through together. And look, I know that most of the time, when we hang out, you’re a snake. And that’s fine! One hundred percent fine, if that’s what you’re most comfortable with! But uh, I really wouldn’t mind spending more time with you as, like, a person, too, if that makes sense. Not that you’re not a person when you’re a snake! Wait—” He furrows his brow, trying to untangle his words, and looks over, certain that Janus will at least be amused by his rambling.

He’s not. Because Janus is asleep, his chin resting against his chest and his hat about to fall into his lap. Thomas feels an inexorable sense of fondness sweep over him, and with a gentle movement, he reaches over to pluck the hat from Janus’ head, revealing brown hair that falls in springy waves. He places the hat on the nightstand, casting one last look at Janus before returning his attention to his laptop.

There is plenty of work to do, and he is content to do it here, sitting in bed with Janus napping by his side. So he does, his fingers clacking against the keys long into the night, and Janus sleeps on.

-----------

He doesn’t remember falling asleep. But he must, because he wakes, and slowly processes the fact that all is not as he left it. For one, the light is off, the room dark, and his laptop is resting on the nightstand, next to the shadow of Janus’ hat. For another, there is a heavy weight on top of his chest, pinning one of his arms against his side, and in the seconds before his eyes adjust sufficiently to the darkness, he fears the worst, fears that someone has broken into his apartment and… crawled into bed with him, and the irrationality of that idea is enough to dampen his panic. He squints, trying to will his vision into focus, and begins to make out what features he can see of the face pressed against his chest, features that very closely resemble his own, and that is when he remembers: Janus on his arm, Janus injured and bleeding, Janus on his bed, Janus asleep. Janus… still here.

Janus, snuggled up against him, his head resting on his chest, his body curled into his side, latched onto him with both… no, there’s more than two arms. At least four, maybe more; it’s difficult to determine without the light on, because all that Thomas can tell is that he is being very thoroughly hugged, and that it feels very nice.

This fact is distracting enough that it’s a full three minutes or so before he realizes that there is another figure perched on the edge of his bed. Panic roars up in him once again, his heart pounding and the hairs on the back of his neck standing on end, but then he notices the details, notices the poof of the figure’s sleeves, the wildness of their hair silhouetted against the light that creeps around the edges of the doorframe, the unholy red gleam of their eyes. And he… well, he doesn’t relax, not exactly. But most of his fear sidesteps directly into annoyance.

“Remus,” he hisses, as quietly as he can manage. “What are you doing?”

Remus cocks his head, his eyes shining brighter. He’s crouched almost like a grotesque parody of a cat, ready to pounce. But the Duke himself is still and silent, and it’s very odd. Almost worrying. And when he finally speaks, it’s not at all what Thomas was expecting.

“DeeDee got hurt,” he says, voice a subdued whisper, and Thomas is taken aback, both by the seriousness of his tone and the evident consideration toward not waking Janus up.

“I— yeah,” Thomas replies, uncertain as to where this is going. “I, uh, patched him up as best I could. He said he’d heal soon.” A thought occurs to him, and if Janus weren’t keeping him flat on his back, he’d be sitting bolt upright, finger pointed in accusation. “Wait, he said he was hurt in the Imagination. Did you have something to do with that?”

“I can’t keep an eye on every part of La La Land at once, Thomas.” He shrugs. “It’s not my fault if Snake from Snake Farm wandered into something he shouldn’t have.” He giggles, high-pitched and a little manic, but Thomas wonders at his tone of voice. It’s as irreverent as always, but underneath that— can it be concern? He really didn’t think Remus did concern. “Snakes should know better than to let their guard down. Your mind is dark and full of terrors.” He smiles, several rows of pointed white teeth gleaming an unnatural white in the shadows.

“I don’t even watch—” He cuts himself off, shaking his head, and then freezes as Janus makes a small sound. Seconds pass, and he waits with bated breath, but Janus doesn’t seem to wake. “Okay, then,” he continues, more quietly. “Is there a reason why you’re here?”

Remus blinks, and once again, Thomas is reminded of a cat. A terrible, eldritch horror of a cat, but a cat nonetheless. “DeeDee doesn’t like to be around people when he’s hurt,” he says, rocking back and forth in place. “He doesn’t like people knowing when he’s weak.” He sighs through his nose, his breath whistling more than is natural. “He holes up in his room and doesn’t come out for anything, usually. Not even when I bang on the door and put rats in his air vents.”

Thomas stares, trying to process that. “But he’s here with me,” he says dumbly. “He decided to stay here. He’s…” He trails off. He doesn’t need to describe what Janus is doing; surely, Remus can see it for himself, can see them engaging in what can only be labeled as cuddling. And it’s not as if this is the first time; it’s just the first time Janus has been human-shaped.

“Yes, he is,” Remus agrees, voice sharp, and he is definitely trying to convey something here, something that Thomas is missing. “Tommy-boy, Tommy-boy, Tommy-boy, you’re just not getting it, are you? Well, that’s fine. Just remember that the snakes on the plane die too, if the plane crashes.”

“Is the plane crashing?” Thomas asks, voice hoarse, hesitant, and once again, Remus smiles, wide and dangerous.

“Not now, maybe,” he says. “But it still could. It always can. That’s the fun thing about airplanes. I could help with that, if you wanted.”

“No thanks,” Thomas is quick to reply.

Remus shrugs. “Suit yourself,” he says, and then pauses. “Janus doesn’t let just anyone this close, you know. So don’t fuck it up.”

It’s such an uncharacteristic statement that by the time Thomas has recovered enough to reply, Remus is gone, melting into the bedsheets in a grotesque puddle of goo, and then, even that disappears. Thomas is left in a dark, quiet room, and he has never felt more awake.

But Janus is still here, still asleep, is holding onto him for dear life and hiding his face against his chest. And it’s something precious, something intimate, something that Thomas feels privileged to see at all, and Remus’ voice rings loud in his head: Janus doesn’t let just anyone this close. Why, then, has he allowed him this? Why has he let Thomas see him at his most vulnerable, no matter how reluctant he was at the start? Why did he choose to stay, rather than leaving once Thomas nodded off?

Each question only leads to more questions, and it’s clear that he won’t receive any answers tonight. So he settles back in as best he can, though it is a long time before he manages to fall asleep again.

In the morning, Janus is gone. He wishes he could be more surprised.

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#sanders sides #ts sides #platonic thomceit #character!thomas #janus sanders #ts janus #remus sanders #ts remus #my fic #part two babyyy #long post

[trekscribbles]

Chapter 3—Triple Threat: A Stone Triplet Fic

Fandoms: Leverage/Leverage Redemption, Librarians, and Almost Paradise

Cross-Posted: AO3 and FF

Summary: Eliot and Jake are both in the Philippines for separate jobs that turn out to be related. Kai takes the existence of Alex's brothers as a personal attack on her mental health. Ernesto happily goes along for the ride.

Chapter 1, Chapter 2

Jacob Stone needed a vacation. He wasn't sure what it was that was eating at him, but he could feel it building up, weighing on his patience and fraying at his nerves. He'd been snapping at the others more than usual—at Ezekiel, mostly—and while he knew it wasn't fair, he couldn't seem to control himself. And he'd spent decades perfecting his control over his emotions, of keeping his feelings hidden until he was ready to let them go.

So when the Clippings Book spat out a page about a new artifact to hunt down, Jake took one look at the location and stuffed the paper into his pocket. "I'll take this one," he told Jenkins, the only other person who'd witnessed the assignment. "Tell the others I'll be gone for a few days."

"Are you sure it will take that long?" Jenkins asked shrewdly.

Jake shrugged out of the long sleeve flannel he'd been wearing over his t-shirt—he wouldn't need it where he was going. "A couple of days at least," he said. "Can you tell them?"

"Certainly." Jenkins gave him a smile and reached out to take his shirt. "Shall I prepare the door?"

"Thanks, Jenkins."

Once everything was ready, Jake stepped through the door of the library and into a world drenched in sunshine. He sucked in a breath, unable to keep from staring. He'd seen more than his fair share of beauty over the years, but this... this was different. The colors here seemed brighter, more vivid, as if the greatest painters in history had all collaborated on this single canvas. Green leaves waved at him from gently swaying palm trees, and overhead a sapphire sky stretched across a peaceful horizon. He heard the door to the Library shut behind him, but he didn't bother looking back. His heart was already lost to the sound of waves in the distance.

"What are you doing?"

Jake started, blinking at the woman who'd just spoken. She stood across the path, half-turned as if she'd been going the other direction. Had he cut her off? He'd been so focused on the scenery that he hadn't looked where he was walking, so it was definitely possible. He glanced back at the door he'd come out of and frowned at the Employees Only sign in its center, then made a quick study of his surroundings. His back was to a building that appeared to be a hotel, judging by the pool and uniformed staff to his right. "I'm sorry," he started. "I was—"

"You're supposed to be back at the gift shop," she said, stepping toward him. She held a drink carrier with four coffees in one hand, and the scowl she gave him seemed too severe for a stranger. Her eyes sharpened as she got closer. "What happened to your hair?"

"Uh... what?"

A look of disbelief swept over the irritation on her face. "Oh no. No, this can't be happening."

"What? What's happening?"

"You're not—you're not another one?"

"Another what?" Jake's irritation flared, and he fought to get it back under control. The woman was clearly confused. He shouldn't hold it against her.

"What have I done to deserve this?" she muttered to herself. "I'm a good person. I help people. One I can understand—I've made mistakes. Two, maybe, after everything I put my mother through. But three? No one deserves that."

"Ma'am," Jake said. "I think you've got me confused with someone else. I don't—"

"Your name is Stone, isn't it?" she asked.

His hope for a peaceful vacation shattered. Jake did his best to keep his voice even, but he could still hear a tremor of frustration as he spoke. "How do you know that?"

"You'd better come with me," she sighed.

Jake folded his arms. "I'm not going anywhere."

"You are if you want answers," she said. When he still didn't move, she added, "My name is Kai."

As if that was his biggest question. He wanted to argue, to demand that she tell him how she knew his name and where she wanted to take him, but he kept his mouth shut. If he'd learned anything from his time as a Librarian, it was that he should follow people who said they could lead him to answers—especially since he hadn't done any research beforehand. Usually he read the Clippings Book pages through several times before leaving on a mission, but this time he'd only skimmed to pick out the relevant details: the artifact he was supposed to retrieve was something called the Ring of Harmony, and it was in the Philippines. He'd thought that was all he needed to know to start with. Apparently he was wrong.

So he took a breath, telling himself that he was Flexible Vacation Jake, and followed her along a path that led from the resort to a long expanse of beach.

"Do you live here?" Jake asked, matching her stride.

She glanced at him and frowned. "At the hotel?"

"No, here." He gestured vaguely. "On the island."

"Yes."

Okay... he'd been hoping for more, but it was a start. "Have you noticed anything weird lately?"

"Weird," she echoed. "Yeah. That's one word for it."

She wouldn't say any more, and after a few minutes of getting nothing but monosyllabic answers, Jake gave up the conversation. The warmth of the sun was starting to feel oppressive, and the gentle breeze now felt like the portend of a coming storm. How could something he had just found so beautiful now seem so restrictive? With a single conversation, he'd managed to lose the sense of joy and wonder that had nearly blinded him when he'd walked through the door. He used to be able to ride that wave of passion throughout the whole mission, even when Ezekiel was at his most annoying. Now? Now he just wanted to finish up and retreat back into his office.

When had he started looking at this life as a job instead of a blessing?

"There," Kai said, pointing up the beach to a small building with a brightly painted sign hanging over the door.

"Paradise Gift Shop?" Jake read, more confused than ever. "What, you want me to buy a t-shirt before you tell me what's going on?"

"He can use all the sales he can get," Kai shrugged.

"Who?"

She pointed again, and Jake looked back to the shop. Three men had just walked through the door and were making their way down the steps to the sand. The first was a wiry man with a gun on his belt, but the other two—

Jake stopped. He watched as they filed onto the beach, talking easily with each other, laughing. It wasn't possible. Alex had been in Spain the last time Jake managed to track him down, and Eliot... Eliot just dropped off the face of the earth. Jake had given up hope that he was even still alive. How could they be here, together?

Without him?

One of them looked up and waved to Kai, who stepped aside so she was no longer blocking their view of Jake. "Is that...?" the other one said, shielding his eyes and squinting. Jake didn't move. His thoughts raced, but they didn't seem to bring him any helpful information. Just a steady stream of What's going on? and How is this happening?

"Go on," Kai said, nudging him forward. He took a jerky step and stayed there, forcing a slow, even breath through his lungs. He saw Kai peer at him from his peripheral vision, waiting, but he couldn't move. He couldn't think. He just watched his brothers walk up to him, frowning, as if they weren't sure what to do next.

"Jake?" one of them said—the one with the shorter hair. Jake couldn't tell them apart. His own brothers, and he couldn't tell which was which. It had been so long... if they didn't share his face, he doubted he'd have recognized them at all.

"Another one?" asked the wiry man, moving to stand beside Kai. "How many more of you are there?"

"It's just us three," answered Jake's other brother.

"Jake," said the first. "Say something."

Say something? What did they want him to say? He'd spent years trying to get them to talk, begging them to get together, to be a family. They were the ones who walked away. He'd stayed home, taken over the business he never wanted, given up his dreams, waited. And decades went by, and they never came. They let him do their share of the work, take on their share of the responsibility, and they never came back.

And now they wanted to talk?

"Eliot," Jake said, his voice hoarse. "Alex."

His fingers curled into fists, and he swung at them both.

#triple threat #stone triplets #the terrible triplets #eliot spencer #jacob stone #alex walker #leverage redemption #leverage #librarians #almost paradise #fanfic