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kwaj115 · 9 months

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Ina Kingsley x MC: I’m not needed, never will I be - Part 2

Summary: A simple question that makes Raven crack under pressure.

Warnings: ANGST, negative thoughts, swearing, maybe a sprinkle of fluff, hurt Raven, angsty flashback

Tags: @kulaykape @ikingsley @domakir @loyalshrimpfan @barnibumblr @loyalshrimp @alleycat97 @blaine-hayes @swimmingshoebakerydreamer

Author’s Notes: It mentions some of Raven’s flashbacks and negative thoughts. If you are uncomfortable with it, I advise you not to read it. This does not affect the other stories, think of it as an alternate universe or something-) It mentions some characters from previous fics. For the ones who do read it, I hope you enjoy it. It has not been proofread, although, feedback is appreciated if you message me in private. I will edit it later. This series may be discontinued.

“Lillian?”

“How dare you walk away, why did you leave? How can you say you were bored?!”

Raven looks around and lets Lillian in to avoid waking up the neighbours.

“Come in.”

She sensed Lillian’s reluctance.

“Please.”

Raven sat Lillian down and offered some tea but decided to make it herself after her glare.

“What changed in you to say you were bored?”

Raven sighed.

“I lied.”

******A few months back******

“Ina, why can’t I come along?”

The older woman gave an amused look as Raven followed her around while she was packing her bag with a pout and her arms crossed.

“It’s only a week.”

“A week without you, Ina.”

Ina sighs and settles on the bed, she pats the space next to her so Raven can sit.

“Rae, we can video call and text, we’ll be fine.”

*****

Raven sulked to the airport, following Ina.

“Raven, I promise I will call when I land.”

Placing a kiss on Raven’s forehead, she held her. Raven took her time taking in Ina’s scent before letting her go and walking to the gate. She waved until Ina disappeared into the crowd before trudging her way home.

*****

Continuing with her usual daily routine, without Ina, she texted her.

Queen of my Heart

Ina: What are we having for dinner?

Raven: I can cook ;)

Raven: And clean

Ina: 👀

Today at 7:48 PM

Raven: I miss you.

Raven: It doesn’t feel the same in the apartment when you’re not here.

Delivered 7:49 PM

Waiting for her reply, minutes turned into hours. She fell into a slumber, letting go. A vibration filled the room from the device, light blaring from the screen.

Queen of my Heart

Raven: I miss you.

Raven: It doesn’t feel the same in the apartment when you’re not here.

Read 10:30 PM

Ina: I know, I’m sorry. I’ll be back soon, Rae..

It was difficult for Raven to get up in the morning. Upon seeing Ina’s message, she felt at ease. She decided to visit Rudra and spend time at the gym so she doesn’t feel alone.

“Hey, Rud!”

“Raven! You’re here today, any problem?”

“Ina’s out on a work trip so I thought I can check up on you.”

“Jesse is in the office too, I just need to step out right now.”

The woman went to check up on her cousin, excited to spend time with her after they hadn’t had much time together.

“JESSE! OH MY GOD, I MISSED YOU! You doctors are so hard to catch for bonding time.”

“Well, Lillian and I have been spending quite a bit of time soooo”

“Ahhh, I see. I see heart eyes”, Raven smirked.

Jesse rolls her eyes and they began sorting out the office. Raven decided to fill the air with some casual talk to avoid the silence she already has at home.

“Where’s Ina? Aren’t you supposed to be clinging to her legs like the big baby koala you are?”

“I do not!-”

But Jesse silenced her with a single look.

“Okay, fine. Maybe I am-”

“Exactly.”

“So Jesse, I have a question. If you don’t mind?”

Jesse nods before giving Raven a curious look.

“How do you manage to have a strong relationship when you and Lillian spend much time apart? I’m surprised Charlotte is holding on considering how her mom is away from home often.”

Jesse puts away binders before she gives her full attention to Raven.

“Why do you ask?”

Raven shrugged and mumbled.

“Because why not, I’m just curious.”

Silence blanketed the room as Jesse observed Raven busying herself with papers.

“It’s communication and being vulnerable with each other. You inform the other person of how you’re feeling like they’re your diary.”

Raven thought for a moment before turning to the older woman. Giving a nod, they both continued to work in silence before Raven returned home.

“Ina, who is this?”

“Oh, it’s just a friend from the group. We’re meeting up for a reunion after a long time of not seeing each other.”

Ina kept on moving around.

“I’m glad you’re going out.”

“Thank you, Rae. I’ll be back.”

With Ina leaving, Raven can’t help but feel left out. Yet, she was still cheerful. As the night went on, she received pictures of them together with the last one of her friend giving her a peck on her cheek. Raven couldn’t help but feel hurt and jealous. She felt jealous of them being close in that way but hurt that they could be together since they are closer in age and established in their career paths.

Later that night, Raven tossed and turned. Unable to sleep with her racing thoughts. She read the time as 2:00 am and concerned for Ina, she decided to read her messages again.

Queen of my Heart

Ina: What are we having for dinner?

Raven: I can cook ;)

Raven: And clean

Ina: 👀

Yesterday at 7:48 PM

Raven: I miss you.

Raven: It doesn’t feel the same in the apartment when you’re not here.

Delivered 7:49 PM

Yesterday at 11:07 PM

Ina: *sent 21 attachments*

Raven: Baby?

You okay?

How long will you be until you come back?

Delivered 11:52 PM

She waited for a response, even an accidental message, but there was nothing. She decided to wait it out only for her to knock out before she received a message.

Today at 2:48 AM

Ina: heyy babbyy, im just gonna crasshh at my friends placee, sleeep welll

Delivered 2:48 AM

Raven woke up and the first thing she checked was her messages. She read Ina’s text which resulted in a little pinch to her heart. She wasn’t sure if she should be jealous or if she should be glad that she had a trustable place to stay while drunk. Before she could begin her morning routine, there was a knock at the door.

#playchoices #ina kingsley #queen b #ina x mc #professor ina kingsley #professor kingsley #queen b ina #ina kingsley x mc #ina x raven #raven wardin

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holidayvisa · 2 months

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9 February 2024

9 February 2024 - Elise picked me up at 8 am and we drove to goat Island. On the way, we stopped at Elise's favorite bakery in Matakana for quiches, sandwiches, salads, croissants and pain au Chocolat. We drove the rest of the way to goat island. At goat island, there were quite a few cars at the carpark, and a lot of people with wetsuits and snorkeling gear, so I expected things to be crowded. Elise showed me how to put on the wetsuit (it's more complicated than I thought)

Swam for over 4 hours. Got in at 10 am, got out at 2:10pm. And we were swimming the WHOLE time. We had intentions of taking a break to eat some lunch, but we just non-stop swam, dove, and snorkeled for the entirety of the 4+ hours. Elise gave me some instruction on how to free-dive and how to breathe before a free-dive - you're supposed to do tidal breathing, which is just several sequences of inhalation and exhalation to relax, then one deep breath all the way out, pushing all the air our and clenching your diaphram, then one huge breath all the way in, breathing into your belly, then diving down. She gave me some tips for how to equalize my ears while holding my breath; the most helpful tip was to take the snorkel out of my mouth when trying to equalize. We saw a bunch of snappers and a couple crayfish. Elise said when she's spearfishing, she NEVER sees that many snappers (usually they're running away from her since she's hunting them) or snappers as big as the ones we saw today.

We had a posse of snappers following us around; I think they just liked hanging out with us and adopted us into their school. Swimming through kelp tunnels.

Elise clocked me at like 53 seconds for one of my dives to a max depth of 7.5 meters! There were several times where my mask fogged up, and Elise kept telling me to just lick it, go to town on it, and make-out with it 😂!

A few times, I tried inhaling either through my snorkel or just normally with my mouth on the surface, but all I breathed in was a mouthful of saltwater, and I had to tread water for a bit and gag and cough it up. When my mask fogged up and when I inhaled water, Elise would ask me, "Are you having a good time? Should we head in? We can head in anytime you want." And my response every time was, "I could stay out here forever!"

Elise pointed out an eagle ray that was sneakily sitting on the ocean floor with some sand covering part of it up. We both dove down to get a closer look, and then he took off! We spooked him, I guess. So, Elise and I chased him!

Around 2 pm, Elise said, "we actually have to go," so we swam back to the beach. We changed out of our wetsuits and walked back to the car. At the car, we snacked on leftover dumplings from the Thursday night market and a Greek salad from the Matakana bakery.

Elise drove me to Cam's house, and we arrived around 4:30 pm. She dropped off some kingfish that she'd caught while spearfishing on Tuesday; she left some kingfish for Cam's family, for Jordan, and for me. Cam gave me a run-down of timeline for night canyoning. I drove to TSW to pick up Jordan, then drove to Piha to meet two clients, Owen and Javier.

We started the abseil (normally the fourth abseil, but for half-day trips and night canyon trips, it's the only abseil) at 8:30 pm, right at dusk. Jordan and both clients went down with their headlamps turned off, which was SO COOL!

By the time it was my turn to abseil down, it was proper dark, so I turned my headlamp on for my abseil. At the bottom of the abseil, we all turned headlamps on and kept them on for the rest of the canyon. Glow worms, bioluminescence, cave wetas, stars, more-pork owls (ruru), more glow worms, more bioluminescence, eels. Owen kept on saying things like, "it feels like I'm on an alien planet," "I feel like I'm on Pandora, the blue people planet in the movie 'Avatar,'" and "this seems like it's not even real life." It was pretty out-of-this-world when we walked through the bioluminescent algae. Every step we took, the ground beneath our feet would light up. When we'd been walking for several steps, we'd turn around and see each of our footsteps lit up by the bioluminescent algae. We played in the water, just rubbing all the surfaces we could find with our hands and feet, and as we excited the algae, it glowed! This was the clients' first time abseiling, first time canyoning, and first time night-canyoning. It was also my first time night-canyoning in Piha Canyon. I LOVED it! It was such a cool first experience in Piha Canyon at night, seeing the glow worms and the bioluminescence.

Drove the clients to Sky Tower in Auckland; Jordan navigated for me. I dropped Jordan off at TSW, then drove the van home. I pulled into my driveway at 11:59 pm.

I'm grateful for Elise. I'm grateful for Cam. I'm grateful for Jordan. I'm grateful for an amazing first night-descent of Piha Canyon. It was Jordan's first night-descent of Piha Canyon as well. Today was a BEST DAY EVER.

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heliosoll · 2 years

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hi i’m not sure if you’ve answered this before but i’m shifting to winx club and i’m in the middle of scripting alfea cause i’m making it a college instead of a boarding school. i kinda wanna know a little more about the classes you took there and such.

like what was your schedule like? were the classes hard? what kind of exams did you guys have? is griselda as mean in real life? did you guys take a history of magic class and if so is there anything interesting that you learned about the magic dimension through that class? also in the show, Brandon, sky, riven, etc. all had dragons. do you have one of your own or were they only for specific people?

i’m so sorry if this is a lot and you don’t have to answer all of this if you don’t want to. it might be boring to answer but you’re the first winx club shifter i’ve ever seen and i’m so interested in the small details of peoples drs😭

AHHH I don't mind at all I love talking about my Winx DRs!! Okay, I'm just gonna go down the list and hopefully this helps! Standard disclaimer that I'm only describing the realities I experienced and that you'll likely shift somewhere else so if there's anything you don't like in my answer, don't worry too much.

For Alfea specifically, we started the day somewhat early! We woke up around 5-6 am and they served breakfast from 6 am to 9 am (sometimes they closed early). First class started anywhere from 6:30 to 10 am depending on your schedule. Most classes lasted about 45 minutes to an hour although there were some that were technically two hours (they typically split those up so we had breaks in between). Lunch/dinner is more of a free for all so they start serving it at like 10 am and keep going till everyone's in bed. Classes stop anywhere from noon to 2 pm! Sometimes they lasted longer if we were doing something special but our days were usually pretty short. We had to be in our dorms by 9 pm and lights out by 10 pm! Although since you aren't gonna be living there, that doesn't really matter hahah

The classes weren't particularly hard for me but there were definitely students who had more trouble. Alfea classes and lessons can typically be divided into "in-house classes/lessons" and "hands-on classes/lessons". In-house classes/lessons are classes/lessons where you're just sitting at a desk and taking notes. In these ones, you're usually not performing a spell or making a potion, but instead learning the basics and what-to-dos of it. Meanwhile, hands-on classes/lessons are literally what they sound like. These are classes/lessons where you're actually doing something and not just taking notes or reading a chapter. This can range anywhere from spells, potions, flying, practical exams, etc. Most classes have a mix of these lessons (except for classes like history or math where you can't actually do something).

Exams were separated in the same way! You had written exams and practical exams. Practical exams were always more fun since you weren't just sitting at a desk. And there were exams for literally every class, so def prepare for that.

Griselda being "mean" is kind of a yes and no. She's not mean in the sense that she would insult you or make you feel bad on purpose because she never did that. But she was "mean" in the sense that she was extremely strict, had really high standards for everyone, and was fairly blunt with students who messed up. She gave out a lot of punishments (detention, cleaning, early bed, etc) and she wasn't afraid to scold you in front of other students. So yeah,,, yes and no. All the other teachers are fairly nice so I feel like it's not too bad?

And yes we did take a History of Magix class! We actually had that for multiple years since there's a lot to cover. Not to sound like one of those people, but I really enjoyed learning about the different wars. I also really liked learning how magic came to be, how different cultures approached it and used it, how magic mixed with culture, etc. It was also really interesting learning about how all the different planets learned about each other's existence and how they established a connection! Honestly, there's just so much to learn about Magix and it's all really fun if you like history!

So in canon and in my DRs, the dragons were specific to Red Fountain! Not every specialist has a dragon but most people in the "knight" specialty do. The dragons typically only bond to one person, although them bonding to more than one person can happen if those people are very close (lovers, best friends, family, etc). Red basically has a history in dragon wrangling and protection. The dragons you see in the show that are bonded to them were actually endangered! Red was tasked with the protection of the species and it worked since they aren't endangered anymore but also slightly backfired because they got so used to people that they now prefer to be around people. They're classified as "working animals" now :) Similar to horses I guess? But don't worry! I scripted out all kinds of abuse, including animal abuse, so they're treated very well in my DR. If you want a dragon yourself, I would just script that Alfea has the dragons too (and that you can bond with one).

And don't worry about sending a lot of questions! My Winx DRs are very dear to me so I love sharing them 🥰

#dr storytime #letters 🎀#ahh i think ill shift there again soon i miss my babies

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slayyyter · 7 months

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Daily routine (hard)

I wake up at 5:30 am, eat a bowl of generic brand cereal with 2%, go to the nearest 24/7 tanning salon (fake if i want to look orange today, real if i want to have cancer when im 40ntoday). I go to the grocery store to get my usual daily needs (snacks & other ephermera). I do my simple 2000s trashy snooki inspired makeup and spray hairspray inside my mouth so my sucked in stomach can keeps it's shape (it never works but i still try + i love the flavour). I get dressed in my nirvana tee and a next season plaid Vivienne Westwood Skirt with a pair of cute thrifted St. Laurent boots. Then i walk towards the bus station. I get on the bus with the most amount of people inside so more people can see how good i look today (and everyday). I usually use my wired earphones to listen to inspirational music to get me ready for school (the parappa soundtrack or notorious k.i.m by lil kim). I met up with my two male egg friends and all the girls who think they're my friend but they rlly aren't🙄. I usually write down whatever i can off the board for like 3 hours before excusing myself and leaving halfway through the day. While walking away i write the most horrible hot take on twitter so i can get the twitter blue money. I arrive at the nearest gaming themed bar that doesn't card and sneak in 2-3 tequila shots to get me ready for the rest of my day. I arrive home and go right into a warm bath in my beach themed bathroom. I put on a pair of flamingo sunglasses and a whimsical straw hat as i pretend im in hawaii. I dry myself using 5 hair dryers then I go to my walk-in closet and dress in a baggy t-shirts and jeans combo and hide a messy bun under a ball cap. I have sucessfully disguised myself as a twink. I arrive back at school just in time for the last period of the day (i moonlight as a male exchange student named Kevin Kiernan, who they don't even suspect as me bc im such a genius of taking an american accent). I finish school and take a ride to the mall from the rich mean girl who's totally into me.i eat my lunch (taco bell or del taco) with her, stop at mcdonalds for a quick promoshoot (i am the face of mcdonalds cosmetics) then i go to the paid Mall gym to exercise for 1 hour. I walk home and go to bed (it's 3:30 PM). I wake up at 5:30, do my homework then spend the rest on my day watching 1990s-2000s rom coms or pre-code dramas until 8:00, then i start a twitch stream and just ramble for 2 hours while scrolling tumblr to my 10k or so viewers. I brush my teeth and do my skin are routine. I go to sleep at 10:00 exactly, if i can't i'll go at 11:00.

Before judging me

#me

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kaibutsushidousha · 1 year

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Witch, Picture, and Red-Eyed Girl (Sagrada Reset 2) - Chapter 2: Red-eyed Girl (part 5)

[INDEX]

The same day - 01:30 PM

01:30 PM. Almost an hour after Oka Eri attacked Haruki Misora.

Asai Kei was in Haruki's room.

He hadn't been there in a long time.

A study desk, a bed, and a bookshelf. Cat plushies and small props with chibi images of cats scattered all over the place. It definitely looked like a girl's bedroom, but in an artificial manner, like a photo in a room catalog.

Haruki Misora stood in a corner of her room, scared of something she wouldn't talk about.

(What could possibly scare so much her in her own room? There's no monster hiding in the closet. And her eyes were set only on me... Ok, enough with the escapism. Face reality and take another look at Haruki. She's scared of me. She's afraid of meeting me without her ability.)

Haruki took out his wallet.

"It's yours."

He smiled, thanked her, and took his wallet back. He imagined it was as full as it was before. She wasn't supposed to pay his café bill, but he knew it wasn't the best time for that conversation.

"Are you hurt?"

He worried if that sounded caring enough. His voice didn't emote unless he did it on command, no matter how much he felt the emotion he wanted to convey.

Haruki's smile was different from her usual smile.

"I'm completely fine. Seriously. It doesn't hurt anywhere."

Her expressions, gestures, and phrasing were not her usual.

Kei could play a game of Spot the Differences with her behavior. It'd take him 10 seconds to prove all her lies.

But there was no reason to point them out to her. Her elbow was bandaged and with marks of blood. That fact alone told everything.

(The world doesn't need anything that would make Haruki put on bandages. Making her blood leave her body is unforgivable. But the cause of those wounds is me. I'm never thinking about anyone other than myself, am I? I'm always considering the possibility Haruki will be hurt. I hurt her numerous times already. Premeditately. And I have no intention of changing that. Even then, I still can't forgive myself for it.)

"Sorry, Kei.", she said.

(You did nothing you need to apologize for.)

"No, it was my fault."

(There's so much I was careless about. I've made nothing but mistakes in these past two years, and this bandage on Haruki's arm is one of those mistakes given concrete form. My power falls so horrendous short of the ideal...)

The next thing he needed to do is get a full picture of the situation. To test if her ability is truly sealed. He would have already done it if he was able to fully ignore Haruki's feelings.

But he couldn't. It was most likely true that Haruki's ability was sealed. She was going to apologize again when the Reset didn't work. He didn't want to make her do that if he could help it.

"Command me to Reset", she asked.

Her voice was firmer than usual.

It contained a level of emotion she usually didn't consider necessary.

(Hah, she's showing off how powerless I am. Haruki Misora understands Asai Kei's thoughts better than anyone. That was so obvious. How could I not have noticed?)

"Please do what you find most correct."

(How could I not notice that nothing makes her sadder than me not acting normal?)

"Wait one minute."

The coward needed to stall for one minute to decide what to do next and how to interact with the girl.

"Understood."

After hearing Haruki's voice, Kei closed his eyes.

He needed them closed to remember the past 2 years in 1 minute.

And then reconfirm what he was already tired of knowing.

Their ability was always part of their interactions. Haruki Misora's Reset and Asai Kei's Memory Retention.

Two middling abilities that didn't amount to much on their own.

(Our abilities were what connected us.)

They were like key and lock. One couldn't be used without the other. Their abilities were the reason why they promised to stay together. The two stayed by each other's sides for two years, automatically, almost naturally.

Such a casual, twisted, and cruel connection.

Haruki Misora's ability didn't mean much to her. That was a very abnormal mindset by Sakurada standards, but she rarely ever relied on her ability.

ーIf I lost the power to Reset… would our relationship change in any way?

(If that was the only thing making you sad over the loss of your ability, then I wish I could tell you that the lack of the ability doesn't change your worth. That you don't need to change over that. But I can't, because now you no longer need to be with me all the time. And it'd be way too irresponsible to tell you this truth. After all, I'm the one who wanted our contact to be centered around our abilities.)

After exactly one minute, Kei opened his eyes. He looked straight into Haruki's eyes and twisted his mouth into a visibly false smile.

(Right, I'm always smiling at times like this. Because it makes things easier. But Haruki will see through the lies.)

"Haruki, Reset."

Haruki's face was intense for a moment, and then...

"Yeah, I can't."

She smiled back at him. She didn't apologize.

(I forget how strong this girl is at her core. And I knew this for so long. What a joke. The guy with the power to remember everything can forget something this important.)

She looked straight into Kei's eyes, her expression more serious than ever.

"I have a favor to ask. Please retrieve my Reset."

Kei returned her eye contact.

"Sure, it's what I was going to do anyway. I swear you'll have your ability back."

Their twisted and cruel connection is something they need to get rid of in the future but now was not the time.

"Thank you.", Haruki sighed.

And her usual smile finally returned to her face.

"This was very reassuring."

"You cycled through these emotions pretty fast."

"Not at all. Anything you wish for eventually comes true, Kei. Oka Eri is no match for you."

(I'm not so sure. Nothing about Oka Eri's ability is confirmed yet.)

He couldn't be sure that it was possible to recover the Reset. But he couldn't bring himself to look insecure in front of Haruki at the moment.

"Sure, I'll make it work.", Kei answered as if it was no big deal. "Are you ready to leave?"

"Yes. Where are we going?"

"There're lots of places to go. The first being the street outside."

Murase Youka was waiting there.

She could have entered the apartment, but she wished for Kei and Haruki to be alone for a while.

"Understood.", Haruki answered.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

When Kei and Haruki opened the apartment door, Murase was leaning on the wall directly in front of them.

The first thing she said upon seeing them:

"Right hand, Oka Eri's ability."

Kei had asked this before. With this command, Murase could erase abilities on contact. It's possible it could erase Oka Eri's ability cast on Haruki.

She moved towards Haruki and asked.

"I'm going to touch you, ok?"

Haruki nodded.

"Please do."

Murase's hand softly touched Haruki's forehead.

It kept going up to the top of Haruki's head, and after a moment of hesitation, she touched Haruki's chest next.

"Anything?"

Haruki shifted her eyes to Kei.

"Reset", Kei commanded.

But nothing happened. Haruki shook her head.

"Sorry. Still can't use it."

"I see", Murase almost sighed.

It was as she expected.

Murase's ability required touching the target. If the target of Oka Eri's ability is Haruki's mind or memories, Murase would need to touch Haruki's mind, which is not very easy to pull off. Kei hoped this could work because Murase once managed to erase an ability cast on a cat, but the nature of the ability being used back them is not the same as this.

Opening and closing her hand, Murase whispered.

"I'm more useless than I expected."

(Absolutely wrong.)

"You have an excellent ability."

The best ability Kei knew was without a doubt the witch's future sight, but for a second place, it's hard to find an ability as "can do anything" as Murase's.

Murase gave him a half-glare.

"Better than the Reset?"

"Don't know. That's a complicated question."

He couldn't rank the Reset. Too much emotional bias attached to the choice.

"Either way, you can't deny it was useless now."

Murase was uncharacteristically frank. Kei was surprised. He was though she had absolute confidence in her ability.

"So, what next?"

"I'll ask Mr. Tsushima about Oka Eri's ability."

He had already called the teacher and decided on a time and place to meet. Without knowing the inner workings Oka Eri's ability, he had no way to formulate a plan.

"I'm going with you, okay?"

(Wasn't expecting that, but thanks.)

"You want to helps us?"

Murase shook her head, astounded by his denseness.

"What do you think I spent my morning doing?

She walked under the scorching sun to find Oka Eri. She already told him that.

(She's surprisingly cooperative. Goes to show how much she's a good person at her core. She can be aggressive sometimes, but I have no reason to refuse her cooperation. Her ability is extremely handy. If life gives you lemons, make a lemonade.)

"Then I have favor to ask."

"What?"

"Find out what Oka Eri is doing. Without being found out, if possible."

He was going to meet Oka Eri at 9 PM. He was hoping he could know the cards in her hand before the time comes.

Tracking was Murase's specialty. She can erase the sound of her footsteps, know the direction where people are, and produce peepholes. And if she's found out, she won't be in danger unless she makes any dumb mistakes.

"Understood", Murase agreed. Then she grinned and pointed at Kei. "I can do it. Not even you could notice me trailing you."

"When did you do that?"

"It's a secret. Doesn't matter either way."

(What the hell? I need to watch my back better.)

"So, how long do I need to watch Oka Eri for?"

"Until I say you're done."

"You're a really cheeky guy.", Murase giggled.

Kei responded with a smile.

"You have no idea how self-centered I am."

"No, I think I can tell."

"Weird, I thought I was great at hiding it."

"Liar. You do nothing to hide it. Right hand, what's between me and Oka Eri. I'll call you when I find her."

"Thank you. I'll message you if anything happens on my end, too. Keep your sound notifications on."

"I know. Bye."

Murase walked away.

Haruki spoke next to him.

"You've been getting along with a lot of girls lately."

"You should also be making more friends, don't you think?"

"Any recommendations?"

"Nonoo, perhaps."

Kei mentioned a cat-loving girl he often found sleeping by a Shinto shrine.

She and Haruki were both challenging small talk partners, so Kei couldn't imagine the two holding a conversation and was very curious to find out what that would look like.

"I'll try.", Haruki gave a serious answer.

"Good. We should also get going."

They need to see Tsushima and learn what they can about Oka Eri's ability.

"Roger.", Haruki nodded.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

2:15 PM.

Oka Eri got off the bus. She was at the bus stop right next to Sasano Hiroyuki's house.

She took out her phone and called the first number in her call history. She called them many times but it always went to the answering machine.

She sat on the bus stop bench, listening to the dialing noise. She put down the plastic bag she had in her hand, lied down, and crossed her legs.

The dialing noise eventually stopped. Her correspondent had finally picked up her call.

She could hear a deep male voice from the phone.

"Hi there, Oka Eri."

"Don't call me Oka Eri. We're not friends."

She didn't know him very well, so she didn't want him acting too chummy in their interactions.

"So, did you get rid of the photos?", he asked.

"Not yet. I just got off the bus."

He called her immediately after she sealed Haruki Misora's ability and talked to Asai Kei on the phone. He ordered her to eliminate all of Sasano Hiroyuki's photos.

The plastic bag next to Oka Eri contained lighter oil and matches. Her role was burning Sasano's entire collection.

(Shit, I shouldn't be wasting my time with this. I'll meet Asai Kei at 9:00. I gotta prepare for that. Why now of all times I need to burn some stranger's photos?)

"Do you need anything from me?", he asked.

"I have a few questions."

She meant to ask those questions when she took her orders, but he announced he had something else to do and hung up without waiting to listen to her say anything.

"Why do we still need to burn the photos?"

"Because they're pictures of something that should have been photographed. More precisely, photos no ability should be allowed to reproduce."

She heard that before.

"Yeah, but you already made me seal the Sasano's ability, no? So why am I being asked to come back another day to get rid of the photos?"

"Does it matter why? We have a contract."

(He's right...)

Oka Eri would obey his orders, and in exchange, he would leak Bureau-exclusive information to her. Information about Asai Kei, about the Resets, and about the person with the best ability in Sakurada.

Oka Eri switches the crossed legs.

"I know that. So I'm asking for information as my deserved reward. What are you making me do?"

"Oh, ok."

She could hear a quiet laugh on the other side of the phone. She felt mocked and didn't like that.

"Sasano Hiroyuki lied about his ability. He didn't need his ability to enter the photos.", he said.

"What was the lie?"

"Sasano doesn't need to use his ability when he's ripping the photo. The activation is only necessary for the first step, when he's taking the photo."

"So basically, even with his ability sealed, as long as he still has photos he took using his ability, he can still enter them?"

"Yeah. And it doesn't have to be him. You and I could also enter the photos we ripped."

This was fascinating to hear. Oka Eri smiled.

"So we should have confiscated all the photos after all."

"Yes, exactly."

"Then why did we let him get away with just the seal before?"

There was not much of a point to disabling his ability.

"I didn't know about it back then. I thought the seal would have solved everything. But yesterday this one member of the Bureau started gathering information on Sasano, you see. I got curious and kept my tabs on him. Without this coincidence, we'd still have been in the dark about his ability."

"Hah, how dumb. Didn't think I'd ever see the Bureau be wrong about an ability."

"You can't blame us. How many abilities do you think there are in Sakurada?", the man dispassionately asked. "About half the citizens have abilities. That puts the number of abilities on the 5 digits. No way our measly public institution can manage all of them that strictly."

The man took a pause before he continued speaking in a lower tone. Like a teacher trying to speak to an underperforming student.

"The Bureau is built under the illusion that it's possible to regulate all the abilities. It's just a fantasy. Reality couldn't stray further from that. That's what makes Sakurada so dangerous. Much more dangerous than you think."

A line she heard from his mouth countless times.

"I don't get it. Sakurada is safe as long you have the ability to see the future, no?"

That was another piece of information she learned from him.

The best ability in Sakurada and the user locked in a building. A lone woman observing all potential problems in Sakurada.

"She's definitely competent. We never found anyone as useful as her. But didn't I already tell you? She's about to die.", he declared with a chilling voice.

She gripped her phone harder.

"Are you serious?"

"Yes. If you want her ability, you gotta be faster."

"Is that really okay for a Bureau member to tell me?"

"Absolutely not, but we're way past the point it matters."

He spoke unemotive, as if he was talking about a distant country.

"The Bureau already extracted all the information it needed out of her. She's a dried husk now. Broken remains of the past abandoned in a deteriorating building. There's no more value in keeping people to guard her, so the security there is full of holes. Your ability can do the job."

Oka Eri gulped and asked.

"If I fail my attempt to take her away, will you protect me, perhaps?"

She heard dry laughter.

"How could I? That's not a clause in our contract."

Oka Eri cackled. "Sure isn't." Then contained her voice as much as possible before continuing. "By the way, you still didn't answer the important question. What are you making me do? What wasn't supposed to be in a photo? What's your goal?"

He sighed.

"I'm only disclosing the Bureau's info. Not my own. You have no right to ask about my goal."

Oka Eri cursed internally.

He was a Bureau member but his philosophy was different from the Bureau at large. And when he needed to things that go against the Bureau's will, he used Oka Eri.

"I gave you all the information you wanted, haven't I?", he asked.

Oka Eri asked mainly about Asai Kei, the Resets, and an ability better than the Reset.

"Asai Kei has the MacGuffin, right?"

"Without a doubt."

"He's trying to protect it, right?"

"Probably. I'm not sure and I don't care much to find out, but I assume he is."

"That's all I need to hear."

(if I can take away the MacGuffin, I win against Asai Kei.)

"Bye, Oka Eri. I pray that you can break free from your past one day."

The man hung up after delivering this final message in the mocking tone of someone who didn't mean the wish he made. Oka Eri barely knew anything about him.

But his methods resembled what Kei was like 2 years before.

Oka Eri violently pulled her hair, lost in thought.

(Break free from my past? What the hell do you know? But ok. Doesn't matter. I got the gist of Sasano's deal. I don't need the details. I'll use any means at my disposal.)

Oka Eri stood up, grabbing the bag with her oil and matches.

She was ordered not to leave a single photo unburned. No one would notice a few pictures missing from the burning pile.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

He reclined on a black leather chair.

"Bye, Oka Eri. I pray that you can break free from your past one day."

The man hung up after delivering this final message in the mocking tone of someone who didn't mean the wish he made. He handed the phone to the woman standing next to him. The phone was hers. He didn't like carrying objects in his pocket.

Taking her phone back, she asked him.

"Are you sure this is the best course of action?"

"You mean my decision on the photos? Or telling her about the photos? Or perhaps my policy in dealing with the nameless system??"

"All of them. Telling her about the nameless system was particularly dangerous, in my opinion."

"It wasn't. Everyone connected to her is under control."

"Also, Oka Eri shouldn't be disposing of the photos alone. We need someone watching her."

"No, it's fine. Her taking some photos with her won't be a major problem. If I needed a perfect operation, I'd have used someone else."

"But Oka Eri acts out self-interest. We can't be sure she will follow our orders."

He shrugged.

"I don't care what that girl does. My only interest is that no incidents happen."

(The blazes just need to burn without thinking about where their flames are spreading to. Whatever gets burned, it won't be my loss.)

He threw his weight to his back and crossed his legs.

"You know, have you ever thought about the despair in the fact that the ability to see the future exists?"

After this quote, the man smirked.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

At 3:00 PM, Kei and Haruki were in a small park. The cries of the cicadas were numerous and prevalent due to the large number of trees. The two sat under the shade of the trees, on a bench that had already lost most of its paint. They were supposed to meet Tsushima in this park. A building next to it had a Bureau office.

Kei checked his watch. It has been almost an hour since they arrived in the park. They got there about 10 minutes early. That meant Tsushima was 50 minutes late.

When Tsushima Shintarou finally showed himself, he was wearing a suit. Quite unusual for him. Nostalgic, even. He raised his hand with the face of someone who didn't want to be here. His other hand carried a brown A4 envelope.

"Sorry. I'm late."

"We're the ones who should be apologizing for the tough request."

Kei and Haruki stood up and greeted their teacher. Tsushima threw himself at the bench the two students had been sitting on.

After a light stretch, he started talking.

"Quite a mess you got yourselves into."

"Yeah, I can tell."

"Don't you think you've done enough?"

"About what?"

"Everything." Tsushima relaxed all his muscles and reclined on the bench. "Haruki's Resets aren't absolutely necessary and you know it. And without them, you have no reason to stay in the Service Club. Put this crappy job behind you and become a proper 15-year-old. Enjoy your high school life."

The rebuttal to this didn't come from Kei.

"I don't want to."

A simple refusal.

He was glad Haruki was with him. Kei alone wouldn't have been able to say what she did. He knew what she would answer but couldn't possibly answer in her stead.

"You've already done more than any teenager should. Learn to relax, geez."

This time it was Kei who answered.

"We do relax a decent amount. We do what we want when we want without stressing over what people think about it."

Holding back on your wishes for no reason is just tiring.

Tsushima laughed.

"You're practically a workaholic."

"Just like you, Mr. Tsushima."

"Don't give me that, I cut corners wherever I can. I actually want less stress in my life."

"And yet you're working during summer vacations?"

"I skipped supplementary classes at school today, you know?"

"To search information at the Bureau for us."

"Not because I wanted to. I did my share today, so I'm taking a day off tomorrow."

Kei smiled. He knew that despite what he said, he'd still teach Murase's supplementary lesson the next day.

He looked at the sky and spoke.

"What do you think Oka's ability is?"

"Probably brainwashing or something with a similar effect."

"Anything more specific?"

"I'm not sure. But my theory is the ability to manipulate memories."

Tsushima made eye contact.

"Why do you think so?"

"Pre-Reset, when we saw eye-to-eye, she didn't use her ability on me."

If creatively used, an ability to brainwash others could do practically anything. For example, she could have made him hand her the MacGuffin or cooperate in sealing Haruki's Reset.

And yet she didn't use her ability on Kei.

"This got me theorizing that her ability is not very effective on me."

Asai Kei's ability allows him to accurately remember the past. And one of its drawbacks is that he's not allowed to forget them ever again.

If Oka Eri has the ability to manipulate memories, the two abilities would cause a complete paradox. When abilities clash contradictorily, only the one with the highest intensity gets to be effective. And Kei's ability intensity is extremely high. If his memories were manipulated, he would probably remember both the correct memory and the manipulation process.

"Congrats, right answer."

Tsushima handed him the large envelope.

"Here's the file on Oka's ability."

"Thank you."

He bowed and took the document.

While he was taking the paper out of the envelope, Tsushima made his commentary.

"The file titles Oka Eri's ability as Memory Addition and Memory Subtraction. It's just memory manipulation, but they split the effects into addition and subtraction for simplicity's sake."

The envelope contained 5 printed pages. The first page was a detailed explanation of Oka Eri's abilities and substantiated speculation on the unconfirmed details. The remaining 4 pages were real usage examples and their results.

"First, there's the Memory Addiction. Basically, she can implant non-existing memories. It can be anything. If Oka Eri gives the target an unclear idea, the target's own head will make things up to turn that into an existing memory."

That's the effect cast on Murase Youka. She was convinced that something scary happened and created her own scary memory.

"When doing so, she can manipulate their memories in a way that will somewhat reliably command them into performing one particular action. For example, she can go a step beyond manipulating memories to convince them something dangerous is approaching and directly convince them that they need to run away."

That's why Murase called Kei. She planted the memory that when something scary happened she needed to call Kei.

"That's powerful."

"Yeah. She can get pretty much anyone to do what she wants by convincing them that they're lovers or belong to the same group."

People act based on their memories. If their memory tells them they want to ride a bus, they'll ride it, and if it tells them they want to make a phone call, they will. If they're convinced the person they're talking to is trustworthy, they'll believe pretty much anything they say. Controlling memories means controlling actions.

Tsushima pointed at Haruki.

"And the effect she was hit with is most likely the other one."

"Memory Subtraction?"

"Yeah. This one is simpler. It makes people forget something. Haruki forgot how to use her ability."

Kei looked at Haruki.

She nodded.

"It's true, I can't remember how I Reset the previous times."

Looking only at the consequences, taking away the knowledge of how to use an ability is the same as taking the ability away. The victims weren't able to notice the difference.

"How can I remember it?", Haruki asked.

"Oka Eri's ability has three major weaknesses.", Tsushima answered.

"Those being?"

"First: the ability requires at least 5 seconds of eye contact to activate."

That was part of Kei's theories. The account of how the ability was cast on Haruki makes it obvious enough already, but Sasano also mentioned her bragging about her contact lenses. She was using those lenses as a tool to make people look at her eyes.

The ability was as powerful as it was easy to deal with. But this weakness meant nothing now that the ability is already cast on Haruki.

"Second:", said Tsushima. "The ability falls apart easily. If a third party tells them exactly what memory was added or subtracted, they'll eventually remember the correct memory."

Kei nodded.

After checking behind Murase and explaining to her that nothing scary was happening, she became aware of the mistake in her memories. Her ability was extremely powerful short-term but manageable long-term.

"Then I'll remember how to Reset?", asked Haruki.

(No. You can't. Sasano can't remember how to use his ability after a long period of time. Tsushima said "if a third party tells them exactly what memory was added or subtracted".)

"It's theoretically possible but practically impossible.", Tsushima listlessly answered. "You, Haruki, were the only person in the world who knew how to Reset. No one else can accurately teach you how to do it."

Sakurada's abilities were abstract more often than not. It would be difficult to verbally explain how to use one.

"Making someone forget their ability is the only application where Oka Eri's ability is expected to have a permanent effect.", Tsushima said.

That application was a loophole in her ability's restrictions. By making someone forget information no one else in the world knows, it becomes impossible for it to be remembered again.

"Do you think I can remember on my own with enough effort?", Haruki asked Kei.

"It's worth trying, but I don't know."

He could use his ability to forcibly awaken her memory, but there was one number missing in that equation.

Without losing spirit, Haruki asked Tsushima.

"And what's the third weakness?"

He nodded and answered.

"Oka Eri can't keep two effects on the same person. Using it a second time cancels the first effect."

That was another restriction Kei had considered.

She didn't seal Murase's ability. It was highly likely that she couldn't seal Murase's ability and get her to ask Kei for help at the same time. Oka Eri prioritized separating Kei and Haruki over disabling Murase's ability.

Kei needed to be sure.

"So if she uses her ability on Haruki again, she'll remember how to Reset?"

"Yup, that's right.", Tsushima confirmed even though he really didn't want to.

This would get another memory of hers manipulated, but this could be reverted by Resetting back to 11:49:32.

"Thank you.", Kei nodded.

He could see a clear way to retrieve the Reset ability.

"Don't do anything too dangerous."

"I'd never."

He needed to create an environment where Oka Eri would use her ability on Haruki again. This meant putting Haruki in contact with her. He couldn't afford risky methods.

Tsushima said goodbye, stood up from the bench and turned away from them.

Kei bowed and thanked him.

When he raised his head, his eyes met Haruki's.

"Do you think you can handle this?"

Kei nodded.

"Oka Eri's ability is much less of a challenge than I was imagining."

Everything Tsushima said was among the possibilities Kei was considering, but he felt a lot better having it confirmed.

"The scariest thing Oka Eri could do is pull someone I know to her side, but that won't work. The memory manipulation will be undone as we talk."

That's the best thing he could have heard. He was actually suspicious that Murase was made into an Oka Eri spy. So before going to Haruki's house, he went through a lot of annoying and tiresome methods to make sure her account was true. It was awful, but he needed to be sure since the plan was to have her use her ability on Haruki.

"Did you ever consider the possibility she made me a mole with her ability?", Haruki asked.

"Of course I did.", Kei answered.

But if Haruki lied, he would have seen through it. He had two years' worth of her face, gestures, and words memorized. He'd need to be really dumb to still be deceived.

"I'm glad you weren't Oka Eri's mole.", Kei said.

"Yes, me too.", Haruki answered.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Kei spent the rest of his day thinking about Oka Eri.

He read Tsushima's whole document and chatted with Murase to keep track of her actions. And then he remembered everything related to Oka Eri. Not only their conversations. Her face when they passed across each other in the hallways, her profile in the schoolyard, and even the appearance of her old house.

The biggest issue was Oka Eri's mindset. What is she thinking? What is her goal? He needed to know in full detail.

Pre-Reset, she said:

“Evildoers are always trying to cause problems.”

“Because it’ll upset you. Do I have to spell it out? I hate you, dude.”

“See, that’s what’s so annoying about you. That’s why I can’t back down until I see you hopelessly defeated.”

The girl in the middle school art room said.

“Eri once told me she wanted to be like you.”

“That you never took others seriously, never opened up, riled people with empty promises, were proud of your worst behaviors, and belittled the whole wide world. Basically, you’re a bad guy.”

“I remembered one thing. Eri said only Asai is allowed to say her proper name.”

And two years ago, Fujikawa Eri said:

“What do I have to do to get stronger?”

He remembered his own answer.

He could easily imagine how much his words chained her.

Oka Eri called him at 5:00 PM.

“Sup, big guy.”, she said through the phone.

Her voice was cheerful and carefree. It was faked.

"I decided on the stage for tonight's show. Remember that lighthouse we saw through our middle school library window?"

"Of course.", Kei answered.

The lighthouse had been closed for almost four decades. Now it was just a tall, purposeless building.

"It's there. Don't forget the MacGuffin."

Kei called her before she could hang up.

"Wait, Fujikawa Eri."

He heard a deep breath, then a scream.

"You don't get to call me that name."

A yell with hints of crying.

Hearing that, he was sure.

He knew what she was trying to reject the most.

"Sorry, Oka Eri."

"I'll never forgive you."

"Yeah, I know."

And then she hung up.

Kei sighed. He had plans for that night.

#sagrada reset #witch picture and red eyed girl #asai kei #haruki misora #murase youka #oka eri #urachi masamune #sakuin #tsushima shintarou

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unrequited-words · 1 year

Text

I haven't had a chance to write down how I'm feeling lately. Since it's January 2nd I just wanted to write down how the first day of a new year went.

It was an okay day. I had Sunday off like I normally do. I woke up around nine and got to sleep in. The bed we have is a piece of dogshit and my back has been fucked for a while.

We had the older kids for a week and it was the last day we had with them. They mostly stayed in their room we have set up for them. My stepdaughter on her phone/tablet and my stepson on his tablet.

It was snowing all day. The baby was pretty okay for the most part. Doing toddler things like getting into everything and asking me to watch Paw Patrol for the 72nd time which is normal for her.

Later that afternoon I put her down for a nap and I got to relax with the older kids and my husband. She woke up around 4:30 or so and about 5:15 I had the bright idea to shovel the driveway to help my husband since he did the porch in the back yard earlier that day.

I figured since I'm out here let me get the kids ready to play in the snow. The baby lasted ten minutes maybe as she kept putting her hands directly in the snow and cried and said ouch (I need to buy her some damn gloves)

My stepson made a snow Angel, we had a snowball fight with the older two kids. After ten minutes I took her back in to warm up with her dad who stayed in because it was too cold.

My step daughter went in and after five minutes I had my step son play in the back yard with the snow. My husband finished up dinner.

Later that night, we watched Star Wars. The two older ones could give a flying fuck about the movie. My stepson I guess is on the spectrum so I had to get on top of him on certain things. The baby was in and out of watching the movie and would rather watch Cocomelon.

I fell asleep twenty minutes before it ended. Around 10 the kids went to bed and so did the baby. Husband fell asleep on me which was fantastic because I never see him or get to spend time with him since I've been working a lot of overtime.

Not a bad first of the year.

January 2nd

I woke up at 830 because my back has been fucking killing me since I shoveled the snow last night. I picked their bags, made breakfast and of course yelled at my stepson because he can't pay attention to anything more than five seconds at a time.

Around 11 am we left. Husband is driving and we've seen several cars spin out because of the snow, multiple car wrecks and Utah drivers who can't drive worth dick.

This trip usually takes three hours to drop the kids off and it's taken an hour more due to heavy traffic, having to rebuckle this toddler and readjust myself over and over to get comfortable.

I'll write more when I have something else to update with besides get off my lawn, my back hurts etc 😂

EDIT

2:30 p.m 1/2/23

Dropped off the kids with their mom. Due to weather and snow for us she beat us by ten minutes when we are normally early. I changed the baby in the bathroom. I came back out and had the older two hug their sister.

I strapped her in and husband said we'll stop in an hour and I said well let me pee. I went back inside to pee and while in the bathroom my stepson hugged me and I cried. I owed went back out with the kids and their mom. My daughter hugged me and I hugged her right and cried again.

I tried so hard to hold it together but the connection I feel with her has always been there since day one. I made sure the baby was strapped in tightly since she Houdini'd herself out of the damn car seat during the way there.

I forgot the tablet and husband said I was gonna say to hop back with her. I almost dove back there since she was complaining already. She had my phone the whole way.

Between where we live and Nephi it got really scary. We made it home at 6 pm and left at 11 am. What a long stressful drive. It's eight and a hot shower is calling my name.

Happy New Years for what it's worth

#personal #mine #s

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chocolate-teapots · 2 years

Text

Cuddle Therapy: Park Jimin

●╭╮╭╮╭╮╭╮╭╮╭╮╭╮●

So you sort of get drunk and hire a cuddle therapist

after a hard day of work. What a fantastic idea!

●╰╯╰╯╰╯╰╯╰╯╰╯╰╯●

Warnings: actual physical contact, y/n swears whoopsie, excessive alcohol consumption, awkward cuddling.

So they say a drunk person's words are a sober person's thoughts but what the hell do they say about actions?

I was just having one of those days, coming home from work as the responsible adult I was, feet aching from shiny high heels that the office forced me to wear so I couldn't run away from the piles of work they gave me and face blotchy from the cold air of the evening.

"Fuck. Fuck. It's fucking freezing."

Working at an office or working generally means dealing with a lot of things you shouldn't have to deal with and so, after a day of people laughing behind my back at something or nothing and my boss throwing tasks at me to juggle, I decided that when I arrived home I'd take off my bra, put on a movie and get piss drunk.

My schedule for the evening was pretty full and it was safe to say by 8 pm I was having a great time. I was being a responsible adult letting off her steam in a very healthy and mindful way.

"Move bitch get out the way, get out the way bitch, get out the way!"

A nice bottle of wine then turned to vodka and then anything I could find in the back of my dusty cupboards.

Everything was in slow motion and every time I moved a part of my body it felt like it was trapped in a bubble and extremely heavy and weird. Waving my arm around in a drunken haze could only be fun for so long and I soon found myself sat there with a half-full bottle of vodka under my armpit, wondering what else I could do to demonstrate how much I hated my life.

Yes. It was the lonely phase of the evening.

"Hmm what to do, what to do..."

I tap my fingers against my leg, enjoying how I didn't feel it at all.

I yelled-

"Hey Siri, Google what to do when you're bored."

But really what I said was this-

"Hey Siri, Google... bored... stuff."

I would be very surprised if he actually understood me. My lips felt as though they'd been injected with Kardashian level filler and my chest burned from the constant hiccuping.

"Okay, I found this on the web..."

𝑪̲̅𝒖̲̅𝒅̲̅𝒅̲̅𝒍̲̅𝒆̲̅ 𝑻̲̅𝒉̲̅𝒆̲̅𝒓̲̅𝒂̲̅𝒑̲̅𝒚̲̅

𝐂𝐏𝐈 (𝐶𝑢𝑑𝑑𝑙𝑒 𝑃𝑟𝑜𝑓𝑒𝑠𝑠𝑖𝑜𝑛𝑎𝑙𝑠 𝐼𝑛𝑡𝑒𝑟𝑛𝑎𝑡𝑖𝑜𝑛𝑎𝑙)

Perfect. The two things I needed in life combined.

"Thanks, Alexa."

I sat there peacefully, toes wiggling in my fluffy socks and cheeks inflamed and lit up by my television which I had lost interest in about 2 hours ago. The weird romance movie I had put on had somehow transformed into another and it didn't quite match the mood anymore so I sat and read some reviews of this thing.

"Jimin, trained cuddle therapist."

"He is very genuine, super friendly and a professional cuddler. He is very easy to talk to and is extremely passionate about what he does. I have always felt very relaxed after the numerous cuddling sessions I have had. With him...the session times are never enough ;-) Thank you! – Jinhua."

"Oh, I bet you loved it Jinhua."

"𝙏𝙝𝙖𝙣𝙠𝙨 𝙛𝙤𝙧 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 2𝙝𝙧 𝙗𝙤𝙤𝙠𝙞𝙣𝙜. 𝙔𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙘𝙪𝙙𝙙𝙡𝙚𝙨 𝙬𝙞𝙡𝙡 𝙗𝙚 𝙬𝙞𝙩𝙝 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙨𝙝𝙤𝙧𝙩𝙡𝙮!"

I was delighted, a little poorer than before, excited. Then it hit me.

Shit. What had I done?

❁ ≖≖✿❁ ≖≖✿❁ ≖≖✿❁ ≖≖ ❁

As usual, whenever I felt anxious about something I thought it would always be best to drown those worrywarts away with more alcohol. It probably wasn't the best idea to drink any more than I had but I did it anyway. What I really needed was some water.

Or even a real good slap.

It was 10:30 when the door finally knocked and I was so borderline unconscious that I didn't even realise who would be here so late.

Who on earth could that be?

Or more like...

"Who the fuck?"

Jimin!

I fell over the table and brought with me a tv remote just in case I needed to whack someone when I'd willingly let them into my house...

I was completely reliant on Jinhua's words, in fact, Jinhua was now responsible for how the rest of my night would go. Jinhua could've ruined my day from here and she might not have even existed. Definitely not a robot.

But I didn't have to worry.

Stood behind the door was the cutest face I'd ever seen, making my cheeks an even deeper red and sending me closer to feeling just a tiny bit of embarrassment of my state.

I finally realised how drunk I was.

He smiled brightly, lighting up the dingy hallway but his bottom half said otherwise. Though his white shirt was loose and comfortable to cuddle, he was definitely hiding something and drunk me was determined to find out exactly what that was.

"Jimin right? Come in," I gestured him inside trying to hide my lack of balance by disguising it as a hop of joy.

Did it work?

His gaze lingers at my coffee table completely drenched in empty bottles, tissues and spoons. When did I get the spoons out?

I laugh awkwardly, closing the door behind me and being as awkward as ever as if this wasn't my house at all.

"Rough day?" he chuckles, voice thick with soft and deep dialect but the way he carried himself was elegant.

"How can you tell?" I present myself to him, stumbling and eyes not even open and yet I can still see him smile as he laughed that laugh of his again.

He took off his jacket and with a serious expression he says:

"So where should we do this."

And I knew from that moment that I was ready to take him.

❁ ≖≖✿❁ ≖≖✿❁ ≖≖✿❁ ≖≖ ❁

I was very comfortable and I think he was too by the way I slotted myself into his chest so easily on my crisp sheets. He looked at me with fascination probably wondering how a responsible young adult like me could get so piss drunk, alone and sad on a Friday night and honestly if he asked I don't think I could answer him.

"Is this your job?" I ask him, the softness of his shirt sieving my tone until it was barely a whisper.

"Well, I'm getting paid," Jimin answers, hands secure behind my back as if he'd known every single angle of it for years.

"Good money?"

"It's paying for my extra training but it depends on the day," I weren't expecting a sober guy like him to be so responsive to my drunk thoughts so when he actually gave a reply I was lost for words.

"What're you training for?"

"Oh, I'm a dancer," Jimin mutters into my hair as if that wasn't the hottest thing ever.

Dance. Fuck.

"Do you ever have...like pre-cuddle shots?"

He chuckles but I don't hear it from his mouth but from his chest, it's a light and airy sound that came deep from within him and that made me go all goofy against his solid chest.

"All the time," he teases.

I look up to him, eyes all hopeful and glassy.

"Really?"

He laughs again, bright and shiny.

"No."

"Do you ever get turned on?"

I felt him tense slightly but I was too busy thinking about what kind of drunk Jimin would be. Part of me thought he'd be a giggly drunk but another part of me hoped he'd be flirty.

Why did I ask that?

I knew nothing about this guy hugging me and yet I couldn't stop asking him questions.

What was it about him?

There was something about the way his fingertips danced around my skin, through my hair, down my shoulders and my exposed waist too. There's something about Jimin.

Huh like the movie.

"Rarely but even if I do it's against company policy to have sex with clients."

I pull away disgusted. He stops running his fingers, making this all worse.

"What?"

I was shocked, dramatic but shocked.

"I know it sucks but honestly it makes life easier. Imagine having to have a session with someone you had sex with, it would be pretty awkward," he shrugs trying to feed logic to a horny drunk person.

"But still that's like telling you not to breathe!"

That giggle again.

"You know you're really interesting," he looks down at me in a way that begs me to look up.

"Thanks, you're pretty comfy too," I grin into his chest, snuggling more as I feel the high of alcohol leaving my system.

"Interesting," he laughs, emphasising it to make me embarrassed but drunk Y/N rarely gets embarrassed.

Not by no man.

"That's just cause I'm drunk."

"Well drunk or not I'd like to see you again when I'm not getting paid to spend time with you."

I smiled, eyes squeezing together like I had pupils made of onions and I slurred:

"I'd like that too," I replied nonchalantly but the hiccups that followed dragged away any element of coolness that I thought I had at that moment.

Then it was quiet, a perfect moment for thoughts on our exciting future and what it would bring. How would his dancing turn out, when will I see him again? All these questions were burning and important, so important I'd kick myself the next day.

"Jimin?"

Instead, I prioritised another question.

"Mhm?"

Something way more important.

"Can you do the fingertip thing again, please? It feels amazing."

#jimin #btsimagine #bts #jimin imagine #jungkook #bangtan sonyeondan

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lucysweatslove · 2 years

Text

Updates? Yeah, life updates.

The Tech concert was good. He’s a goofy dude and you can tell he just really has fun with it. Husband got smashed and had a grand ol’ time. I took a ton of videos for him.

Because of the concert yesterday, I was very clear at work that I could NOT stay late which ended up causing problems. Usually this is fine, but a) we had a late scheduled patient, b) my trainee is still working on speed, and c) literally at like 5:15 my entire workstation stopped connecting to work apps or anything on google chrome or whatever the edge thing is that replaced IE. I could access the EMR but no videos or email or even IT help. I was on my phone trying to connect and figure it out. Eventually I got it half working but I had to leave then. We had 4 notes left, one I was working on, one my trainee was working on, and two ones we hadn’t even found media for yet. My trainee said she would work on the notes herself and I could review in the morning…

I woke up early and clocked into work before I’m normally awake to finish up yesterday’s work, right? My trainee has done one extra note, staying late to do it, which was great of her, but that still meant I had to do one new note on a very long visit with a patient with a complex history, finish up the note I had started when my computer did the weird connection thing, AND THEN also review my trainee’s other two notes. It’s not a quick process because I have to fix anything missed and she’s still learning. And this doc is literally taking like an hour to do her visits.

Anyway I started work at 8 AM when I normally start at 10, and I finished getting ready for today’s clinic writing about 10:30 and then tried to find media… no media. I was stressed because this doc had a very busy AM hearing loss clinic (about twice as many patients as usual), and while she normally just does the AM clinic on those days, she also added in a busy PM clinic in person. It was just me + my trainee. Other staff who work with that doc were scheduled to only work a half day and deal with a full clinic themselves + help with another clinic, too.

Anyway, I got in touch with my supervisor who said the doc doing the hearing clinic was taking those calls during her commute into work and thus wasn’t using our services in the AM. Which was great because that meant I could work on the other doc’s clinic for my coworker who wasn’t scheduled all day.

My coworker was actually super grateful because she was a little stressed, worrying how she would be able to finish her clinic. We don’t usually have days like today with 3+ providers in with full clinic schedules.

During my PM clinic, it turned out a resident was working, and this resident is highly competent and does notes like they’re supposed to!! Which was amazing. Out of 8 patients, we only were responsible for 2 of them, so my trainee got to to both!

While trainee was working in those notes, I was able to help out with the other two clinics.

During all of this, I was SO NAUSEATED and dizzy and running to the bathroom frequently. If I move my eyes, I get sick. Imagine trying to type and listen and watch a video when you want to vomit every time you move your eyes. 0/10.

Overall I worked for ~10 hours, minus maybe 45 min or so total for breaks when I absolutely needed. It was worth it though because nobody else on my team needed to stay late or cut into study time. If I hadn’t needed to come in early to resolve issues stemming from tech failure yesterday, it would’ve been just a normal day at work.

Now I’m still feeling really sick. No fever or anything. Still not sure what’s causing the dizziness. I have tomorrow off which is nice, but I still have a ton to do so it won’t really be a restorative day. I have heard back from all MD schools now, and have gotten secondary invites from all of them except one which is still reviewing my primary app. UNR and WWAMI came in yesterday, and I was working a little on my UNR app since it’s due next Tuesday, and I had to email them to ask about my sister (current resident; unsure if that makes her a UNR student or not). They haven’t gotten back to me which is *frustrating* but oh well.

Tomorrow’s goals re: med school-

Get my official voter registration certificate thingy so I can upload it.

Finish the app to verify my MT residency status for all the programs that need it verified.

UNR application. It’s fewer essays like Mayo, but it’s also *not Mayo* and essays are max 300 words instead of 500. I think I have 6-7 essays? I can’t remember as I didn’t formally count them and I know some are optional. But 7 essays at 300 words- probably a few hours? Maybe 4?

If time, U of Utah application. They have a lot more in depth stuff- like I have to put in all my activities again but they ONLY want stuff within the last 5 years. They make it sound like a positive because “some students have to select their top 15 activities.” I’m like… or some students don’t even have 15 real quantified activities to begin with because they have one activity spanning a long period of years. Honestly this really worries me because I’m non-trad, even tho I have amazing ties to the state and school in general (would be the third generation to complete any medical Ed there- my gpa did a fellowship and dad did resident).

I doubt I’ll have time after that but if I do, probably U of Arizona applications. They have two campuses done individually, so Tucson first and maybe Phoenix if a lot of the app is the same. Otherwise the Phoenix campus has a much later true deadline and I’ll want to prioritize WSU and WWAMI.

OHSU and then U of Minnesota (both campuses) and then WWAMI and then WSU (since they got back to me later I have a little more unofficial time to complete those).

Yeah it’s gonna be a busy day tomorrow. I work Friday, so my weekend is gonna be packed too. I’m hoping- HOPING- that I can do UNR and U of Utah tomorrow and then for my final 14 apps (assuming U of Iowa offers me a secondary), if I can do them in 3 hours each, I can effectively finish 6-8 this weekend. That would put me through everything officially due before mid-November at the earliest. While they really want you to send in secondaries two weeks after they’re offered, with full time work and literally no time to prepare bc they were offered so quickly, I have to prioritize. So schools I have less ties to are going to be submitted later since I have less chance of getting in those places.

#personal

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