#but after I graduate I can do more hopefully
So last night I found out that today is @euan112358‘s birthday. Naturally, I had to do something special for them to celebrate. Unfortunately, I am very bad at coming up with last minute fic ideas lol ^^;
However! I did think of an idea for a HC post so I hope they’ll enjoy it! ^-^
So, I remembered an ask they sent me a while back where they asked how likely someone was to call Fortune “mom” to which I replied that it’s more likely that she would accidentally get called “big sister” rather than mom since she’s only a few years older than the students.
That ask gave me the idea of writing HCs related to how likely each 1-A student is to call Fortune “big sister” whether it be purposefully or accidentally.
Uraraka: As I mentioned in the ask I got on this subject, I could very easily see a sleepy Uraraka calling Fortune “Nee-chan” as she groggily stumbles into the kitchen one morning. She’s one of the students that definitely sees Fortune as a big sister figure, but she won’t admit it out of embarrassment, especially since Fortune is her teacher. However, once she’s older and an pro hero, I could see her one day telling Fortune that that’s how she sees her.
Todoroki: His reaction was also mentioned in that ask. I could see him one day calling Fortune “Nee-san” much like how he does with Fuyumi. He doesn’t even realize he says it, so he only finds out after seeing everyone’s shocked reactions and someone eventually telling him what he did. He’s surprised but doesn’t get embarrassed, not really seeing it as a big deal especially since it’s obvious that it made Fortune happy. He won’t hesitate to admit that he thinks of Fortune similar to how he does Fuyumi and how he’d be happy to have her as a big sister too. Could definitely see him eventually start referring to her as “Nee-san” after he graduates and becomes a pro hero.
Iida: Would do it accidentally, most likely during a moment when she and Tensei are teasing him about something. It goes along the lines of “Nii-san! Nee-san! How long do you plan on having fun at my expense?!” Unlike Todoroki, Iida immediately realizes what he did and is horrified while Fortune and Tensei are sporting large grins. Iida apologies profusely for his rude behavior and declares he’ll atone by running 100 laps before promptly running away. Tensei and Fortune run after him since they just found something new to tease him about haha Iida takes turns between seeing her as just a teacher figure and a big sister figure. However, after he graduates, he’ll still refer to her as Sensei like the majority of his classmates.
Midoriya: Surprisingly enough, it’s less likely to happen with him that the three mentioned above because he’s so polite. (Iida would be in this position if it weren’t for Tensei and all the teasing lol) However, it is possible it might happen when Midoriya is really sleepy like with Uraraka. While he does sometimes see Fortune as a big sister figure, he’ll most likely continue to call her Sensei even after he graduates. Even so, by the time he’s a pro hero, he definitely sees her as someone important like family.
Bakugou: It won’t happen with him since he doesn’t see her as a big sister figure. She’s a teacher he respects, simple as that. Of course, that doesn’t change the fact that they do have a close bond, getting along better than most people realize. He still calls her Sensei even after he graduates.
Yaoyorozu: It wouldn’t happen with her either due to her always being so polite and collected, so it’s unlikely that events like what happened in previous examples would happen with her. She mostly sees Fortune as a teacher figure but occasionally she wonders, when she’s interacting with Fortune, if this is what it would feel like if she did have an older sister. She finds she quite likes it and wishes she really did have siblings.
Kirishima: Could see it happening when he’s really sleepy or he would do it to play along with Fortune when she’s teasing Fatgum about being a dad. Kirishima doesn’t have an older sister, but if he did, he definitely would love for her to be someone like Fortune. He definitely considers her like family by the time he’s a pro hero after everything that happened at UA and all the Fatfam bonding sessions. However, he wouldn’t come to normally call her Nee-chan, instead just sticking with Sensei after he graduates.
Mineta: Can’t see him ever saying it. He doesn’t wanna put her in the older sister role since that means he can’t flirt with her when he gets older lol While he has no intentions of romantically pursuing her, Mineta still wants to be able to flirt with her like he does with any pretty girl, tastefully of course, never overdoing it. Plus, he mostly just sees her as a teacher figure. He really wants to become a cool hero that can one day make her heart skip a beat.
Jirou: Slight chance of it happening if she was really sleepy but it would definitely be a rare moment. Jirou mostly sees Fortune as a teacher figure but sometimes Fortune does feel more like an older sister to her like when she’s encouraging her passion for music or when they’re singing together. They have a strong bond forged by music which definitely does make Fortune feel like family to her since music plays such a huge role in her family.
Ashido: Very likely to happen either when she’s sleepy or caught up in the moment when whining about something. She gets a little embarrassed the first time it happens, but after seeing Fortune’s warm reception to the title, Ashido stops feeling embarrassed when it happens again. She still mostly calls her Sensei, though, even after she graduates.
Hagakure: I would say she’s exactly like Ashido in this scenario. She would get embarrassed at first when it happens accidentally but eventually she’ll say it jokingly or when she’s trying to play the cute little sister role to get something out of Fortune lol
Kaminari: Could see him saying it when he’s sleepy or when he’s desperately trying to ask for her help, thinking playing the cute little brother role might work to his favor haha He takes turns between seeing her as a teacher and a big sister but mostly just calls her Sensei, only playing the Nee-chan card when necessary.
Tokoyami: Can’t see it happening for the same reasons as Yaoyorozu. However, there are moments when he sees Fortune as more of a big sister figure than a teacher figure, something Dark Shadow won’t hesitate to point out much to his embarrassment. Tokoyami will only call her Sensei because he’s always polite when interacting with her even after graduating.
Asui: Can’t really see it happening since she’s always polite with Fortune. However, Asui does see Fortune as a big sister figure in addition to a teacher figure especially during the moments when Fortune likes to dote on her. Asui really likes those moments where she gets to experience what being a little sibling is like. She’d still call her Sensei, though.
Shouji: Can’t see it happening with him either. He sees her mostly as a teacher figure. Although, there are moments when she’s more of a big sister to him than a teacher. He always enjoys those moments, especially how she tries to dote on him despite his much larger physique. He likes that he feels he can really act his age around her during those moments.
Sero: I would put him in the same category as Kaminari. Could say it when sleepy or when he thinks playing the little brother card will save him. He sees Fortune mostly as a teacher, but during the moments when she dotes on him, she does feel more like a big sister to him.
Satou: Can’t really see it happening with him, but I suppose it could possibly happen when he’s sleepy, maybe once. If it does happen, he would make sure it doesn’t happen again out of embarrassment. He mostly sees Fortune as a teacher figure, but sometimes, he’ll think of her as a big sister figure when she’s doting on him.
Aoyama: Can’t see it happening with him. While he does see her as a big sister figure, he’s too polite to call her anything beside Sensei and mademoiselle. Interacting with her does make him wish he did have a big sister since he really enjoys being doted on by her. Due to them both having painful drawbacks, he feels a special kinship with Fortune as if they really are related.
Ojiro: I would put him in the same category as Satou where if it did happen it would only happen once. He mostly just sees her as a teacher figure, but he really does like how she doesn’t feel like just a teacher to him. He finds her comforting aura really soothing and always gets really happy when she praises him much like however he did whenever he got praised by his parents when he was younger.
Kouda: Can’t see it happening with him due to his preference to not talk a lot and I can’t really see him accidentally signing “Nee-san”. Plus, he does mostly just see her as a teacher figure. Of course, like his classmates, he’ll acknowledge that she definitely has a big sister aura, which he enjoys just like everyone else does. Getting compliments from her always make him really happy, even though they also always leave him really flustered.
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leaning more and more toward just giving up and taking a gap year
Happy Monday! ♥️ I hope your week is starting out well?? The question this week is provided by my dear friend 🐢 Anon who asked me this and I thought it was the sweetest question I wanted to know everyone’s answer to it!! “If you or Jumin had to be away for a few months, what would you give to the other as something to remember each other by?”
Happy Monday Lea!! Start of the week is okay...hopefully it gets better💕 how had your Monday kicked off—good I hope~
This is such a cute prompt! Good thinking Lea and 🐢 Anon, so sweet^^
Here's to another week of Jaf trying to figure out self-ship stories with Jumin X3
If Jumin Leaves:
It's no surprise that Jumin probably leaves often for work. Afterall throughout the duration of the original game, he's constantly going on business trips.
This is no different, work has called him away to another country for three months.
A new branch of C&R opened in Beijing, and his presence is required to help finalize the contract terms as well as kickstart the sister location.
I'm very certain I wear my heart on my sleeve, but nonetheless I'm going to try to hide the fact that it upsets me he's leaving
Afterall it's not like he can help it
It's for work and it's something he needs to do.
My feelings and emotions are things that will only make the trip more difficult on us both
But Jumin is observant and I'm not that great of a liar
He'll never say anything but he can tell the distance bothers me.
It's the day before his flight, and I've helped him check over the list of boxes he has at the office to make sure he's packed all of his proper paperwork
Surprisingly through the day, Jumin has been quite hovering, as if he'd absolutely refuse to move from my side
It's a bit ridiculous but I can't help but laugh.
His face is as pensive as ever, his brow stern and serious
And yet he's sticking to me with no visible signs of budging
It's endearing and I can't help but draw closer to him.
"I have a gift for you, dear," he hums, reaching into his pocket.
"You didn't have to get me anything," I respond almost immediately, suddenly the idea of one of his extravagant gifts feeling like a slapped together apology for the long stayaway
My mood sours and I'm ready to pull away from him
When suddenly he holds out his hand from which a fluffy, white, cat pom-pom phone charm is hanging.
"It looked like Elizabeth the Third," he mumbled, "so I assumed it was cute. I bought one for you and one for me. That way, when we call each other—we're still connected."
I take the fuzzy charm from his fingers, feeling a bit of guilt but mostly amusement
Nuzzling the charm, I peek up at Jumin. "Well yeah we'd be connected, we'd be talking on the phone, honey. Our cell service has the best connection."
"Your humor is as bad as mine," Jumin chuckles and kisses the dip between my brow.
If I Leave:
I imagine if I had to leave for a long period of time, it was probably during my time at college before graduation—maybe I visited Jumin for the summer and I had to return for the semester.
He's been very close with me as the final days up to my flight home approach
Taking days off, making different outing plans for us everyday, even going so far as to cook dinner every night
Jumin does a little something every day.
Like me, he wears his heart on his sleeve, only his poker face doesn't let just anyone see it right away
But paying attention to his actions here and there
I can tell with almost a heartbroken stagger that he actually will miss me as much as I will miss him.
A few days before I head home, I start my careful crafting.
Part of me wonders if this is a good enough gift for him, but as I compile my list, I know that this is something special for me
So I know it will equally be just as meaningful for him.
Jumin sees me off at the airport, something that made me ugly cry for hours after
But before I pass through the gates that lead to customs, I hold out my hand. "Lemme see your phone, love."
Giving me a confused lift of his brow, he complies
It takes me a minute to get the download link, but once it's ready, I make the folder shortcut on his home screen
A music paylist: *°~;'jafnjumin';~°*
"I play so much music while I write," I scratch my head, embarrassed the more I think about it, "that I thought it'd be nice if we'd listen to the same music while the both of us work...like a long distance coffee date. Except without the coffee. Or the date part. Just the nice ambient music..."
He laughs and wraps his arms around me, hugging close. "I'm grateful, perhaps it'll make the dull office atmosphere sunnier."
"I don't think anything will fix that," I giggle, burying my face into his chest.
"Perhaps not," Jumin hums in agreement with a mock wince, before I feel the ghost trace of his lips against the crown of my head. "But I believe your music will help me and keep me company for now until you come back home."
"You're surprisingly sentimental," I grin, enjoying the warm feeling blooming along the bridge of my nose and the round of my cheeks.
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Another amazing scene and you can see the monsters that are there and they are mutants and they are not very high level mutants there is only one flying around in that Smaug and it's his Island and he's our son as well and then go after him all the time and they always fail and he hisses like a snake constantly at them it says things that are very rude like how would you like to play without your head and he comes on and on and say we can't stand anymore come on play so he comes with him and laughs with a fire and they're all dead so this is how he is with them and he's playing a different tune all the time cuz he's trying to dance and they won't allow it but that's him and he's smug and he is King of the mountain
It is a complete honor and it is an honor that is like when you're a graduate of an ivy League school and they pile on another vestige and they put on you an award and stripes and it shows what you've done but here it is an honor and a duty to hold the lens of my Father and my Mother and my dad and mom both. It's an honor and a duty from the perspective of the military side of things but really it is just a great personal gift from Olympus to be part of such a massive massive portion of the plan and to be there as our representative and of course I somehow have a classy act and look at smog and think I've gotten older and I hear him and he sounds older and when it says to them is wise and it's trickery and he is a slippery dragon and he leaves and comes back and he does things that are confusing but I wish Hera would be revived to be there with hers as well. I mean as a child it was a dream this is a dream place to me and it's a dream place at The Hobbit and the cooking and the food and aside from what they are their characters are hilarious and they're fun and it's a great time to watch and to be around and to physically be there is a gift and I am not there now but I'm told I am but I watch it and I say this is just a great movie it is a terrific movie series there's some glory in it and the monsters are fierce and aren't ours except for small but what a wonderful wonderful place to be and a wonderful time to be there it was an honor and a duty
And I'm there too in different format but I see what he's saying you like me to be there as his wife as the second dragon and I will say that we are the white dragons you saw and I'm a beautiful dragon and you always say things to me and I can turn into a woman and he says I don't think that'll do it because these people are mostly gay and they say our women might like that and this is well you know the kind of lame when it comes to that and they didn't actually say it so I think the Olympics what will help and the men are now contesting it saying no no we can do it and then say I don't think so I haven't seen anybody that looks normal down here so she's smiling with me and that's what he says and he says a lot but it means to me we're going to hopefully you get it together there and he says to me the eyes can be a quick thing then come out and they go out and then come back and hopefully the time for the last movie in the series because that would be when it was ideal to be there watching with the eyes installed and I'll agree here it'll be good no they don't like the dragons and it is a magical place in a magical time and I am honored and gifted he says and I do too because it is just a gift from heaven and a gift from God and goddess our mothers and fathers did this wonderful duty as ours this alone would be enough for us forever we are working and we are governing and we do many more things but just to let everyone know that this of course would fill our cup it is just so beautiful story and a wonderful place and he had so much to do with it and so the Thor and Nuada and Ariana and Freya. I heard it one day I'll see how it would be he said I don't really know what the garb is and I've seen it in some movies and I've read about it and I saw it at the armor place down in Worcester and it is just amazing to me but you know all of that stuff and what would be appropriate so we went ahead and worked on it and you said it is just spell binding that the orca making their own armor it is modeled after wheel armor I'm told and it looks very rustic in old fashioned but there are a lot of people around back then who were that so it's very authentic they're saying and to me it's very special to be announcing that and I better stop because we don't have any more room and this is Hera's comment. Tutu is kind of a road hard but he's used to driving and this is an amazing story it's just wonderful and it's full of characters that are hilarious and have depth and just a king and it's a struggle for real and the story is about the emperor of humanity at this time here on Earth restoring himself it is of great importance and what happens is immense importance and everyone is staying
We thank you both for your statements and we understand that it's just overwhelming for you all this other stuff and not having anything is a trial and tribulation and it's ongoing and rents have gotten out of control and we've got to reel them back in before they're completely destroyed along with us because these monsters are out of control
And I mean it you people are out of control
We can't see it we might he says we won't see it in Lord of the rings or The Hobbit because they're not there it's just smog and you say it's only one dragon and you think you've defeated them and so forth or he's fallen and said oh and he got me and he turns into Calvin that there are a lot of monsters and those monsters are fears and you may see them here and you will be horrified he sats
Y 'all he loves being a father more than anything, he was so excited when you told him you were pregnant. Even though you weren't trying to have a baby
Makes an appointment at the doctor for you right away, and that's not all. He wanted to go shopping right away and didn't want to wait to find out the baby's gender. He just wants to take care of you and the baby.
“We have to start planning right away. The baby will need a lot of things. And the best money can buy. Mutter mutter.” You chuckled at his anxious chattering
“Don't worry Izu we have plenty of time before the baby.”
As soon as your son is born Izu is dressing him up in mini might costumes, asking his mom to sew the family matching ones and grandpa shirts for all might.
Speaking of all might he loves being a granddad (yes All might is Izus father) he takes your son out for granddad grandson dates no matter how young he is he goes with him to the beach that his dad cleaned up when he was a teen and gets ice cream with him.
Izuku works A LOT and it gets lonely in his big house all by yourself and it causes many fights when you’re pregnant and your son is young.
“Damnit Izuku!” Your voice boomed for once you stupidly weren't worried about waking the baby. Just a month after giving birth your hormones and emotions were still raging, knocking sound in your brain refusing to settle. “I can't do this by myself.”
“Well, what do you want me to do! I can't just quit my job.”
“It's not like you can't take time off. Even just come home earlier for god's sake.”
“I cant. What about number one hero can you not fucking understand.”
“What about having a family do you not understand! Did you not know what having a fucking baby entails.”
“Yeah I do, but when you gave birth I didn’t expect to have two whiny needy crying brats.” Without another word, your eyes swelled with tears and you ran into your bedroom and slammed the door shut “ah shit.”
Izuku feels instantly bad for taking out his stress on you, he loves your little family more than anything. So he gives you your space while he cleans the entire house. Only then does he gather the courage to knock on the door softly.
“I’m really sorry darling for yelling at you, I know how hard it's been with the house and the baby.” You opened the door quickly and hugged him not wanting to drag the fight out further.
“Don't do it again, okay?”
“I won't. I'll make sure to come home as early as I can. I'll ask my mom and All might to come over more.”
When Izuuku is home he loves to spoil his little boy, buys him all sorts of toys even though he only wants to play with daddy.
Once your son is a little older he loves to tell everyone in kindergarten class how cool his father is.
Izuku makes sure to spend as much time with you and his son as possible and this fathers day he’s glad he got off you and his son made him a precious cake with an even more precious present on top.
Izuku squealed in delight as he picked up the pregnancy test “Hopefully it will be a girl this time.”
Completely planned! He loves kids and told you that early on. He’s the type that sees not wanting kids as a complete deal-breaker. Luckily you wanted kids too, and Mirio wanted to start as soon as you were ready so when you told him you were pregnant three years after your graduation from UA he reacted so well.
“Darling, that's wonderful! I love you and our little bean so much.” He lifted you and twirled you around, not able to stop peppering kisses all over your face.
Through your pregnancy, Mirio begged you to quit your job. He assured you he could provide for you that you should just stay home and be his little housewife. You did just that and you were happy.
Mirio is another dad who spoils them rotten. He's so happy to have one of each that way he gets the best of both worlds, he gets to dress up your little girl and treat her like the princess she is giving her the most sparkly dresses and expensive tiaras. Then with his little boy, he’s more like a gentle giant who loves to go on hikes, go camping, and play hero with his twin sister.
On Fathers day Miro comes home as usual expecting his babies to dogpile on him like they usually do as soon as the door opens, but he was a bit worried when he was met with complete silence.
He nearly melts into a puddle when he walks into the dining room to see his children drawing pictures and finger painting with his favorite food steaming on the table.
“DADDY.” His little girl squealed when she saw Mirio quickly followed by her little brother climbing on top of their dad like a jungle Jim. “Your home, we made stuff for daddy's day.”
“Is that so, well I’m sure I’ll love it, baby.”
Mirio loved spending the day eating the meal you created and hanging the pictures from the children and when all was said and done you slept in your bed allowing your children to climb in. Mirio couldn't help but sneakily take a few pictures before relaxing in the arms of his family.
Dadzawa did y'all really question how much this man loves and wants to be a dad. He may be tired all the time but it's for the right reasons. He was so happy when he found out you wanted kids of course because he already has one daughter Eri!
When he saw how Eri immediately attached to you he was smitten and wanted to put a baby in you right away, so after a year of dating you, he was ecstatic to find the pregnancy test in his bathroom. That was four days ago he was trying to wait patiently for you to tell him but he was waning in his ability to keep his mouth shut so he tried to coax you gently on the date night you have at least once every two weeks.
“Kitty, do you want some wine with your dinner?”
“No thanks bubby, I’ll just have some water.”
“Are you sure, you’ve been a little stressed lately?”
“Well, is there something you want to tell me?” Your eyes narrowed
“Do you know something?” His chin scrunched up, clearly, you weren't talking anytime soon and he was getting a bit impatient.
“I saw the test.” Your eyes bugged and then your entire face dropped.
“Why? This is exciting. I'm so glad we’ll be having another child.”
The fact that he was excited causes a heavy sigh to leave your mouth. Your whole chest felt like a weight was lifted.
Shoto couldn't wait to wake up Eri and tell her the good news that she would have another little sibling.
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Hello! Love your blog. I was wondering if I could get some typing help? I have a general idea of what I am, but that’s not saying much since I have a tendency to hop between a few of them (INTJ, ENTJ, ESTJ specifically). Either way, hopefully you can help me settle it.
I’m 22 and about to graduate from college. It’s been a journey, because I’ve transferred twice and changed plans a few times, but that’s the proper college experience, I think. One transfer closer to home can be owed to depression and Covid, while the first was simply me not meshing with the campus. I’m not too worried about how it’ll affect my grad school apps due to good grades and valid reasons.
Despite the schooling-related indecision, I tend to get an idea of what I want, then fixate on it heavily. Example: I recently tried to publish a novel I’ve been working on for years now. Realistically, I know the odds of getting your first work published and making enough money to start a career on it are beyond low, but a big part of me thought “yeah, except I worked on this draft consistently all these months and this feels right, so it has to pay off” – of course, it didn’t. That’s not to say it wasn’t worth it, but I’ve come to accept it won’t be that easy, so I’m going to focus on a job with more security first lol. That means proceeding with law school. Some friends might think I’m selling my soul by putting my dreams on the back burner. I disagree, though, because if writing is meant to be I can still make it happen this way but with more security. Plus, I’m used to having some higher objective to motivate me through each day, and I don’t like feeling aimless. To me, that would be settling for less: wasting time working next to minimum wage at some place I can’t see myself staying.
I’d like to think of myself as spontaneous despite knowing I’m really not. When I’m with friends, maybe, but I’m more than happy to do nothing on Friday nights, knowing I’ll be able to wake up early tomorrow and do whatever I’m doing at a decent time. That being said, I would be happy to hop on a flight across the world if someone offered to pay the way. I love travel, so I’d hope to find a career that makes that possible. The same goes for whatever work I’m doing. Ideally, I could move from place to place as I do my job, because I fear being rooted will keep me from seeing everything I’d like to see.
I’m definitely an introvert dichotomy wise, but if group work appears, I’m happy to make a plan and remind everyone when a due date is near, and I expect them to follow through or provide some forewarning. I’m not outright nasty when someone inevitably slips up, but I’m not going to give them an excuse either. Can’t relate since I’ve never had a problem with procrastination. Like, I’d say I’m procrastinating, but to me procrastinating is choosing not to get ahead on the project due next week while I have spare time now. That makes me sound like a robot or a liar, but I’m mostly just very aware of my limitations and have learned how to manage work in a way that keeps me from having to stress.
I have no idea how to end this. Quick notes? I’m ambitious but not competitive – literally cannot relate to envy, because I don’t think someone having something means you can’t have it too – you just have to work on/for it. I’m not very curious lmao. Like, I’m as curious as the average person, but I don’t care about how things work (Ti slacking?). Uhh, fandoms annoy me. Like, seeing fans distort characters and needlessly project onto them in cringe ways makes my brain itchy. I’ve been called insensitive. I can easily cut someone off after finding, for a fact, that they’re being manipulative. Whatever baggage they have, I don’t care. I don’t see the point in fighting for a relationship when a “friend” is working against you. I’m also the “advice friend” because I don’t have drama and seem to know how to diffuse it easily or cut it out completely. Now that I think about it, all of my closest friends have a lot of anxiety, so maybe I collect them and care for them a little since I have none.
Hopefully that wasn’t too much useless info. I think I’m mainly struggling on differentiating between lower Ne vs Lower Se. My indecision comes in rare bouts, so maybe that’s the weak Ne manifesting. Or maybe I’m lower Se for forgetting the larger scheme by focusing on material things like getting to travel and making a high salary? Whatever. These are things most people prioritize, though. Let me know if you need any specifics. Also, thank you for taking the time to read this! I really appreciate how informative your blog is and all the resources you share.
To be honest I am really not sure based on this, and it might be good for you to revisit this after a little bit of time out of school. I would rule out the Ti-Fe axis, but I can actually see arguments for either high Te or high Fi My guess is high Ni if you have high Te you don't really sound like a high Si user - and part of what is tripping me up the most is that you said a lot of things that make me thing of high Fi and the spontaneity of Se or Ne, but there's a lot here that really sounds intuitive but distinctly not like an Ne user. So I actually think there are arguments for either INTJ or ISFP, and I actually lean a little more towards "ISFP with good discipline/time management" than INTJ.
Here's my thought process, which hopefully can get you started.
I do feel like transferring twice is a little abnormal (not bad, just more than the typical college experience of maybe one transfer and changing one's major once or twice) but COVID did fuck with things more than usual so no conclusions there.
The fixation on writing a novel and the long-shot of gaining enough success to focus on that full time - particularly right out of school or even before graduation - is either intuitive or possibly high Fi. I really do not think an ESTJ would have that idea - not that they wouldn't be a writer, but I don't think they would have had the same expectations surrounding payoff and would have assumed from the start that this will not be their career initially. For that matter I have my doubts on ENTJ, but it could be possible for INTJ.
The part about spontaneity actually fits really well with auxiliary Se or Ne, in that those types at your age will have moderation from Ni or Si respectively and will often want a combination of stability but also the ability to travel a lot and move around. The example you gave actually still seemed very spontaneous; a lot of ExTJs for example might really dislike doing nothing on a Friday night and would instead have something planned. What you describe sounds very go-with-the-flow, just in a low-key way.
The part about procrastination indicates that Ne is probably off the table but Se is possible; some SPs are pretty good at being realistic about getting things done and it sounds like you don't have the high Te motivation of "I must get this done early" (not that high Te users can't procrastinate or do things on time but not down-to-the-wire).
I often tie ambition/competitive nature to enneagram more than MBTI, but I will say a lot of Te users and especially Te-doms tend to be both. They don't have to be (and if they're only one, usually it's ambition over competition), but it's pretty common. Curiosity is complicated but not caring about how literally everything works does seem like it would rule out Ti and I'd fully agree there. The part about being frustrated by fandom distortion of characters is relatable to me and I feel that comes from a place of sensing, ie, were you not paying attention to canon, so that seems like a point towards high Se for you. The parts about advice and interpersonal relationships mostly just reinforce that you sound more like someone on the Fi-Te axis, which you already suspected, but again...being the advice friend, particularly from a caring position, seems more high Fi to me than INTJ; a lot of IxTJs (and definitely ExTJs) at your age are just not emotionally ready for that level of patience with anxiety. I know I wasn't.
I would also say focusing on the material things (travel, a liveable salary) is more in line with higher Se! Te users do have a measure of pragmatism, so again, can't rule out INTJ, but the travel especially is what's making me think Se is pretty high in your stack.
All in all? My guess is an ISFP with good time management skills, possibly with an enneagram 6 adding to the stability/pragmatism. That said I wouldn't totally rule out INTJ (possibly also enneagram 6?); I just think it's less likely.
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For DADW “You did WHAT?”
I actually have no idea what this turned into. All I know is it's fenders and these two have been very busy developing distant feelings and telling no one, as per usual.
“You did WHAT?”
Anders grabbed his best friend’s arm and shook him.
“Garret Fucking Hawke.”
Hawke grinned, that shit-eating grin that had gotten Anders and himself into so much trouble—and so much fun—over the years.
“Please tell me you didn’t invite Fenris. You have to be joking.”
“Look, I know you think he’s pretentious and arrogant.”
“But he wasn’t doing anything, he was asking about how your studies were going, and I thought I’d invite him to your graduation ceremony.”
“From the fucking University of Mage Arts.”
“Sure, why not?”
Anders pinched the bridge of his nose.
“You know they have demonstrations scheduled. Magic demonstrations. And I’m doing one of them.”
“Exactly! Let Fenris see what magic can do.”
“He knows what it can do. It did worse things to him than ever came out of the Maker’s bum.”
Hawke burst out into laughter.
“Hawke, this isn’t funny!”
“Anders, it’s going to be fine. I’ll be sitting next to him, he knows there are going to be demonstrations. I’m not that dense.”
“Pretty damn close to it,” Anders muttered, cramming his graduation cap on his head.
“Hey, in all seriousness.” Hawke put a hand on the silky fabric covering Anders’ shoulder. “I know what this means to you. I wouldn’t have invited Fenris if I didn’t think he’d be respectful and decent.”
Anders sneered doubtfully, but remained silent.
“Besides, he’ll come to the Hanged Man with us after, and the more the merrier!”
Anders rolled his eyes.
“Go on, get out, I need to prepare the rest of my spells for the demonstration.”
Hawke waved and ducked out of the classroom where Anders was preparing for the ceremony. Anders only had a short speech to do, and then there were seven demonstrations, his spirit healing demonstration last of them all, being one of the most promising theses being presented this year.
As Anders mounted the steps to stand backstage while the presenter before him flourished and threw sparkles into the air above him to finish his demonstration, Anders smiled. Of course! Everyone who came to see the graduation ceremony had to sign a consent form to be possibly affected by magic. There was no way Fenris would have signed that form. He gave Dorian a cheerful smile as they passed each other, and Anders stepped onto the stage. His smile wilted as he looked to where Hawke’s arms waved in the air, giving him two big thumbs up. And next to him sat Fenris. Anders couldn’t see his face beneath the bright hair, but he imagined Fenris glaring at him. He swallowed and refreshed his smile for the audience.
His professors all sat in the front row and eagerly clapped as Anders gave the very short version of his thesis, hopefully in words that even grumpy mage-haters like Fenris could understand. At some point he forgot about Fenris, caught up in explaining how spirit healing could help with medical procedures, calming and numbing spells to act in place of anesthetics.
“For my demonstration, I am going to perform a spell that I’ve been working on,” Anders announced. “Panacea is defined as something which cures all ailments. My altered Panacea spell does not cure anything, but it is a soothing spell which will ease pain. If anyone in the room is experiencing a headache or some other pain, you will most likely feel it easing, or perhaps leaving entirely. I’ve been modifying this spell to be unintrusive, unnoticeable, and to extend over a greater distance. Though, for theatrics, I have included some lights.” He grinned and widened his stance to begin casting. Panacea didn’t really take much to cast, it was simple, but for the sake of demonstration, he added some flair and a sparkling green glow. The movements of his arms did help him to cast the spell further, so that it could reach the entire room.
Silence fell as the spell settled over the audience. Anders knew it was working, he could feel the spell soaking into the audience, doing its quiet and gentle work.
“It will last through the end of the ceremony,” he said, giving a bow. His professors jumped up, clapping for him. Hawke did as well. Fenris did not, but he was clapping along with the audience. That was something at least. Anders smiled and waved as he left the stage. There were a few other short speeches, but Anders didn’t listen, he was too excited to pay attention.
Anders changed out of his graduation gown and cap and went out to meet Hawke and Fenris. Hawke designated Anders to ride in the passenger seat, and Fenris sat in the back.
They arrived at the Hanged Man.
“Anders, may I ask you something?” Anders was surprised to hear Fenris from the back seat.
Fenris glanced at Hawke.
“I’ll meet you two inside,” Hawke said, handing Anders the car keys.
“You’ve been quiet,” Anders said, once Hawke had disappeared inside.
“I was thinking,” Fenris said, his eyes fixed on his knees.
“I admit I didn’t think you’d actually come,” Anders said. “Hawke said you’d agreed to attend, but I assumed you wouldn’t sign the consent form.”
“The spell you used.” Fenris looked up at him.
“My Panacea spell?”
“It didn’t hurt, did it?”
“No, it—” Fenris grimaced and looked down again. “It worked.”
“Good!” Anders smiled. “I didn’t go back for my Masters for nothing.”
“I did not know I was experiencing pain,” Fenris said.
“It was gone,” Fenris said, his brows furrowing. “This ache.”
“Where?” Anders was trying to run through possible scenarios where Fenris would be in constant dull pain.
“The markings,” Fenris said, as if it should be obvious.
“They are lyrium. The experiments I was involved in were more involved than simple tattoos.”
“H-how?” Anders was twisting in the seat now, trying to get a better look. Fenris was still leaning back in the seat, not exactly forthcoming with information. “Do you mind if I look?”
Fenris held his breath for a long moment, and then sighed.
Anders climbed between the two front seats, his long legs flopping awkwardly as he wriggled through the small space.
“You could have gone around,” Fenris said.
“I know,” Anders said, chuckling, “I don’t care too much if I look ridiculous. Now, can I see?”
Fenris pushed up his sleeve and held his arm out.
Anders frowned. They really weren’t tattoos.
“And they hurt?”
“They... ache,” Fenris said, “though I did not realize.”
“Maker,” Anders muttered. “I am surprised you even agreed to come.”
“I do not wish to be a bigot,” Fenris said, his voice softening as he looked away.
“I don’t think...ah, okay I used to think so. I apologize,” Anders said. “I don’t even think I can do anything to help with your...”
“Markings,” Fenris supplied. “I apologize as well,” Fenris said, turning back to Anders, and finding him surprisingly close.
“Oh,” Anders said, finding those green eyes uncomfortably close and wide.
“I was unfair in my judgment of you as a mage,” Fenris said. Anders could only look at his lips.
“It’s behind us now,” Anders said. “Thank you for coming. It...meant a lot to me.” He watched Fenris swallow, his eyes not leaving Anders’ face. Could Fenris feel the tension as well?
“I am grateful to Hawke for inviting me,” Fenris said. He grabbed Anders’ hand. He could feel Anders’ stiffness.
“I am not fragile,” Fenris said, rubbing a thumb over the back of Anders’ hand. “May I kiss you?”
“Is there another Anders in here?” Fenris raised one brow, smirking.
“Just the one, as far as I know,” Anders said. “And you may, though I might get feelings if you do.”
“Well, then we’ll have something in common if that is the case,” Fenris said, reaching up with his other hand to tangle his fingers in Anders’ hair and pull him closer to kiss him. Anders’ eyes were gold and unfocused when they pulled apart.
“Hawke’s going to wonder if we killed each other,” Anders murmured.
“Do you dislike the idea of … this?” Fenris asked.
“The opposite, actually,” Anders said. “I was just thinking my life was about to get boring now that I have my Masters. I think I could use some excitement to keep me on my toes.”
“And I’ve been thinking about getting a cat,” Fenris said, grinning.
“Now I know this can’t be real.”
“Need me to pinch you?”
“I think a kiss would suffice.”
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Ok so I need to know how insane this sounds, a bit is ok but if I’m completely delusional with this let me know. I’ve made posts about my plans for the future before, with culinary school and whatnot, and while I still won’t know how the future is going to work out I think I want to try explaining my rationale for doing like.. everything really.
One of my largest existential fears is complete disconnection from worthwhile society. That is, more so than I’m already alienated. What I’m really scared of is that point in so many people’s lives after they’ve graduated school where they find themselves without friends, without art, and with no place to reach out and nothing to interact with. No scene, no subculture, no movement. Basically a NEET but already cemented in their workplace. I know there are some options for escaping that situation, like maybe you’ll get lucky and find a club to join or end up hitting it off with with a coworker and getting introduced into a new friend circle, but stories like that seem to be an exception and I fear even getting to that point would be fatal for me anyway. Then, of course, there’s the trans thing. I don’t even want to imagine perpetuated existence without some sort of gay space to exist in with other trans girls.
Basically, this is the crux of my rationale for attempting to move to New York somewhat soon, even if it’s a complete and total reset of my life. Assuming I can swing culinary school, that’ll set me up from the get go with a densely populated area from which I can hopefully meet new people, a great music scene, and of course gay shit. Plus, completing school there should land me a decent kitchen job, one where people actually give a shut and might even be moving things forward in the culinary world. The only things I have rn are my friends, whom I truly do love dearly, but I know are eventually going to move away. That’s not only better for them, but doing the same thing I think would be better for me as well.
I still don’t know shit, like anything at all in the entire world ever, but I know I’ve gotta get somewhere and this is as good of a plan as I’ve got. Alternatively I can elope so if you want a mail order bride my paypal is-
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This is a vent I'm sorry
I start a new campaign with the same GM and players (last campaign was okay-ish, though the GM did call my mute character a jerk for not saying she was low on health and eventually falling)
Today marks session two
GM decides to have a woman take my male character down into the basement, take off her dress to "reward me" for the battle in session one, and then get extremely hostile when I decline and try to assault me
What the GM doesn't know is that I have trauma from a sex RP that had made me unwilling to do any RP-esque things until this group
I don't realize that this trauma was still big enough to trigger me until I have to mute my mic because I've started sobbing
The woman who assaulted me decides to kick me while I'm down and say "I can't believe he's gay" or something like that. Because I turned her down.
I hide it as best as I can and barely make any more inputs in the game because it upset me so much
I dread the next game
I can't leave the group because the only other members are my two best friends who want to keep this up while they leave for graduation. I am unable to tell them my feelings because of separate reasons. I'm basically stuck in this until the campaign is over. The GM has stated multiple times that the campaign is very large and expansive
I really don't know if I should ever participate in a RP game again after this since this has been bothering me a lot. I'm definitely not joining the next campaign if the GM thinks one up, hopefully my friends won't be too upset.
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welcome aboard, matilda mills, student #60. we are excited to set sail with you ! has anyone told you that you look like sydney sweeney? according to our records, you hail from austin, texas, usa, she&&her, are cis female, and are here to study astronomy. we also see you received a spot on the ss university because of your money — we won’t tell anyone. during your first few weeks here, other students said you were + brilliant, + lively, but also - hedonistic. it sounds like you spend most of your time at the sun deck. upon checking your luggage, we noticed you packed a set of rosary beads brought from home. hopefully your roommates don’t steal it!
ooc: herro! my name’s cat and this is matilda! i hope you like her and i cannot wait to plot with you all! if you like this post, i’ll show up in your dms as soon as i can but knowing me i have no impulse control and will probably reach out at some point too.
full name: matilda mia mills (née moore)
nicknames: tilly, millda, hell child
date of birth: 12/12/1998 (22)
hometown: austin, texas, usa
gender: cis female
tilly was raised in a religious household. her dad is a pastor of the local church and her mum a true southern housewife. she has one older brother and two younger sisters and a baby brother. out of all of them, tilly is the only one who never seemed to fit in. her brother dotingly fell in love with the church. her little sisters idolise anything to do with housework and her baby brother, well, time will tell i suppose. matilda, or millda as she’s known by her family, is the one with higher ambitions than being a church goer or a pretty little housewife.
she fell in love with the stars at a young age. there was something magical and mystical about them and the moon that fascinated her. growing up, she was the kid who wanted to be an astronaut and be among the stars. her parents told her that that was ridiculous as that’s where the heavens were or when she gained more scientific knowledge about space, they told her only men could go to the moon. her parents are firm believers that women belonged at home and men should work. it’s just how it goes. matilda didn’t like that. she didn’t like being put in a box and did everything she could to fight against it.
tilly’s first rebellion came with science. it’s one of her greatest passions. she loves finding out about things and testing theories. her love for science then led to her having less faith in god to the point where she no longer believed there was enough evidence to sustain the idea of an all-knowing being. in to her teenage years, she was always told that sex before marriage was wrong. of course, a beautiful girl like tilly, it didn’t take long to rebel by sleeping with boys and girls in school. it certainly led to a bit of a *ahem* reputation unfairly given to women who enjoy sex. once her brother tattled on her for the reputation to her parents, she lashed back by coming out with how she was bisexual and some of those ‘boys taking advantage of her’ were girls. her dad tried to convince her to have a second rebaptism to try and make her pure again and rid her of the demons but she refused and refused again. this came to her being known as the hell child by her father. he truly believed she was a devil here to test him and he needed to save her soul which tilly promptly rolled her eyes at.
at the age of eighteen when she graduated from high school with excellent grades, her parents had grown tired of her ways and kicked her out. she became a waitress at a old style diner in town which led to her meeting jonathan mills. he was an older man - 39 when they first met - who swooped her off of her feet. they were married within the year - her family not invited for kicking her out. tilly was just happy to have a changed surname and cutting all ties from her family. she loved the jetting off lifestyle that jonathan gave her with all the money that he had. however, after a year and a half of marriage, she found out he was beginning to stray away from her and ended up divorcing him for a hell of a lot of money. with her new found money, she went back to something she loved. studying aand astronomy which led her to paying to study on the ss university. free from her former marriage, she is feeling the most free she has felt in a while and looking forward to what adventures lie ahead.
*// POSSIBLE CONNECTIONS?
existing: bffs with student #32, secret crush on #46
friends with benefits: something not serious, a bit of fun with someone she considers a good friend. tilly loves sex so i’ll say up to 2 (possibly three in the future if chemistry permits) because i love it (0/2)
flirty banter: this could potentially lead to that third fwb connections but mostly just really flirty conversations that haven’t led anywhere yet (0/1)
old friend: this can be someone from texas or someone she met on her travels with her ex-husband that she formed a bond with - probably had many facetimes with during the divorce and maybe briefly spent time with after the divorce (1/1)
drinking partner: a competition to see who can out drink the other. there’s a lot of banter about who’s the worst drunk but they still end up on the lash whenever the urge takes (1/1)
late night stargazer: tilly can be found out on the sun deck at night watching the stars. any other night owls who want to spend nights talking about existence and life (0/1 or 2)
a brief rebound fling: someone she had a brief sorta relationship/sorta not post her divorce but pre ship. (1/1)
honestly i’m open to anything these are just some desired connections but feel free to request others. the more creative and angsty the better!!!
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hey i’m not sure what your last post was about but it sounded a bit too much like what i tell myself on really really bad days so i just want you to know i don’t want you to leave (even if you don’t know who i am lolol). i think you’re super cool (even if i don’t know who you are) and you strike me as a very comforting and kind of soft hearted person who i imagine always knows what to say when someone’s down and is always willing to help people feel better and i really appreciate that kinda vibe. i don’t know much else about you so i can’t make any more assumptions so yep, that’s what i got. don’t leave even tho you really wanna (mood) bc i think you’re super cool and you deserve to be here ❤️ here’s some facts about me so i don’t seem so,,, distant i suppose: i’m from australia, i’m 20 years old, nearly done w my undergrad and debating going into law but the fees and the commitment is scaring me but i’m also v scared about what to do after uni, it’s all v murky. i’m also unemployed so that really gets me down as well. struggling to find an internship bc i need that to graduate but covid makes it hard to get internships. and i have two dogs! one is 11 and the other is 6, my dad and i are gonna buy roller skates tomorrow as my early 21st bday present. okay, i hope that helped give context of some sort? and also comfort. okay love you, have a good day/night!! xxxx
I really wasn't expecting this but thank you so much <3 It's just this household always finds a way to upset me and the leaving wasn't here on tumblr (couldn't leave even if I tried haha) but like my house. Thank you for being so kind! Ah I totally understand the after degree stress, I'm still debating on entering full-time employment (if I can find one) or applying for a master's and term starts in September but good luck! I hope you can get some work experience or paid work soon! It's difficult in this climate but hopefully opportunities can come soon.
Lucky!! I wish I had a dog, and you have two! I bet they're super cute and I hope you have a great birthday and gets some really cool skates and enjoy your day xx
Isn't it night time in Australia??? Get some sleep! :D Again thank you so much <3 love you
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My god I just read the second part of saudade and let me tell you I screamed. I just finished my viva and after spending a long time drowning in exams I just wanted a break from all the work and this was there sitting atop of the things I wanted to read whenever I got time and then I remembered oh yes I have read saudade before and it intrigued me a lot then and I was so very excited to read this and let me tell you you delivered above and beyond my expectations. Oh my God your brain is so sexy!!! Like how do you come up with such beautiful amazing plots and how can you execute each and every single one of them being nothing less than perfect? Tae's whole life made me bawl my eyes out , like how can people do that to a child? How can people even think about saying such horrible things to a kid?? But I honestly admire Tae a lot in this fic his perseverance , intelligence as well as humbleness are just many of the few things I can list off my sleep deprived brain. I am so very excited to know how this fic is gonna go. I'll definitely come up with a proper review after I hibernate and before college work catches up on me😫😫
But seriously attending college in the middle of an epidemic is so much more shittier than I expected it's like you neither get to have fun with friends nor can you escape from the mind numbing assignments. You even start to consider why you even bothered to take the degree in the first place like seriously I could've chosen a lighter and more simpler degree but no my stupid ass had to take medicine smh.
Anyway before I get carried away thank you for sharing this amazing piece of art with us and really I have a lot more to tell about the story but my eyes are really giving out on me🥲🥲.
🥺🥺🥺🥺 thank you so much!!! it truly means a lot to me that you're liking saudade so far!!!! actually it's funny that you decided to read saudade after being so focused on studies, w me it was pretty much the same! i had a group project SO COMPLICATED that i felt that my brain was going to EXPLODE at some point. my life was literally work, get home and immediately make my part in this fckin project for more than a month. it rly rly drained me. so to cool my brain down i wrote both umbra and saudade during my lunch breaks!
i really feel you. college is pure shit during this pandemic. it's just the boring parts. i started college in january 2020, just a little bit before the pandemic started.... i'll be graduating soon and I haven't even lived the full college experience. it's depressing :( but let's stay strong until this shitty situation is over! i honestly considered dropping out many times but then i'd be wasting all of my past efforts. things will get better (hopefully!)
thanks again for the feedback!!!! i hope you had a good night's sleep!!! 🥰🥰🥰
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Her oldest son, Reggie, had been a poor student who always got low grades and a regular trouble maker in my History class during his senior year in high school. But he was also an excellent goalie on the school soccer team and the team was depending on him to take them into the state finals. The problem was his low grades had him close to being ineligible to play in any sports.
Early in the year she had met with several of his other teachers to try working out a process where he could gain extra credit and receive passing grades. But even with special attention and extra credit Reggie just continued to struggle with History. After a few months of seeing him struggle I had requested a special meeting with Marilyn, his mother. I didn’t want the School Board or other Administration know I was trying to give him special favors so Marilyn and I met for dinner.
We talked over Reggie's situation and agreed that something needed to be done. I stressed that the special favors I was giving to him could be hazardous to my employment if anyone found out. She understood and made it clear that everything would be kept a secret. She just wanted him to be able to graduate and hopefully he could get a scholarship to a good university based on his athletic skills, and maybe he would be able to work this his studying problems and do better at that level.
So after dinner I walked her to her car. She extended her arms to hug me but drew me in and kissed me. Then she asked if I was in a hurry to get home. I said “No.” So she asked me to follow her in my car and she led me to a secluded little motel where she had already booked a room. Inside, she made it very clear to me that she was willing to do just about anything to see her son succeed by playing on the soccer team and graduating high school.
We began meeting at the motel every other week. The night before I was to give one of my bi-weekly exams I would get an email telling me the room number she would be in. This lasted from after the Christmas holiday until the last week of school at the end of May. The sex was always fulfilling and satisfying as she was always willing to suggest or try new positions. In total, we met ten or eleven times and I was sad to see the school year come to a close. She was however, gracious enough to send me a nice email thanking me for everything I had done to help her son advance.
During the summer I found myself really missing her and wishing I’d find an email from her with a room number just for some summer fun. It never happened. The new school year started and I never heard from her again. The following year I transferred to a new school. Imagine my delight to learn her family had moved and she now lived within the boundaries of my new teaching assignment. She was there on the first day sitting on a sofa waiting for her youngest son to enroll and get his paperwork approved. I walked over to her and said “Hello Marilyn” I was thrilled to learn her son was a three-sport athlete and had lower grades than his older brother. “Do you still have the same email address?” she asked.
“I do.” I said with a smile and a nod of my head.
“I hope we can have the same understanding regarding Robbies grades and we had with Reggies.” she replied.
I just continued to nod and smile as I looked down at her incredible cleavage and imagined three more years of meeting up with her.
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Summary: Despite sharing dreams with Teris for as long as he can remember, Aizawa Shouta never believed in soulmates. That was until he met Teris in the real world on his first day at UA. Trouble is, Teris doesn’t know anything about their shared dreams. And the one time Shouta tried to tell her, he nearly lost her completely.Five years after graduating from UA, Shouta still believes Teris is his soulmate. But things have only gotten worse. Teris moved to another town shortly after graduation. And now she’s dating his best friend Yamada Hizashi.
Please remember, this fic is rated explicit and has warnings of sex, violence, and other possible triggers. For a full list of story tags please check the fics AO3 (link to that at the top of my tumblrs homepage).
***Not a new update. SORRY if anyone got excited. Hopefully I'll have an update soon! But I "2nd draft" edit and polished chapters 12 and 13 on ao3, and wanted to re-post the fixes here.***
With the school years end, Shouta hadn’t been able to properly talk to Teris. He hadn’t had more than a couple seconds alone with her in truth; and it hurt and worried him that she appeared to plan it that way. As if she wanted to avoid him.
He could understand that she didn’t want to hurt Hizashi. He didn’t want to hurt his friend either. But Teris cared about him. Shouta was certain of that now. They were meant to be together.
Maybe she wanted to wait and let Hizashi down gently during spring vacation. Waiting the couple of weeks until the end of the school year was a logical decision. Hizashi would no doubt need time to recover from the break up; and the break before the next school year started would allow him time to do that.
If only she would talk to him.
Though he didn’t like the idea of going over to Hizashi's for a small end of school year party, Shouta was desperate to see Teris. He needed to speak with her. There was also the fact that Hizashi had called in one of the favors Shouta owed him to get him to come.
Hizashi owed him favors too. And, if Shouta really hadn’t wanted to go he would’ve called in one of his to deny his friend. The amount of times Hizashi and he had whittled down the favors they owed each other going back and forth that way till one of them caved was a childish but fun game.
Knocking on the door, Shouta smirked at the memory of having ‘won’ the last time Hizashi had tried to force him to attend a party he didn’t want to go.
Teris opened the door, money in hand. She blinked in surprise. “Shouta?”
Shouta cleared his throat. His first thought at seeing her was that she wasn’t wearing a bra.
She scratched her head and crossed her arms. “Sorry. I thought you were delivery.”
“Am I early?” Shouta asked, both taking in and trying not to take in her manner of dress.
She answered the door, he told himself. She has to be wearing shorts under that over-sized tee, they’re just too short to see.
“Early?” Teris questioned.
“Shou!” Hizashi pulled the door open wider. “Come on in, Buddy. You’re just in time.”
“Time? For what?” Teris asked.
When Shouta didn’t move, Hizashi grabbed his arm and pulled him in, closing the door behind. “I told ya I was gonna throw a party, Babe.”
“Yeah. But you never mentioned it again and didn’t invite anyone so…”
“Don’t be rude, Ris. Shouta’s not nobody.” Hizashi chastised, playfully. “And when have ya ever known me to talk about throwin’ a party and no follow through? Take a seat, Shou. Make yourself at home. Food should be here any minute.” He pointed at Teris. “Another sign that we were partying, Babe. Didn’t ya hear how much food I ordered? Did you really think that was all for us?” He grinned. “I mean I know I leave you weak and in need of nourishment after just a couple rounds but…”
“Hizashi!” Teris squeaked, all too aware of Shouta’s presence.
She blinked. Now that Hizashi mentioned it, she had thought it a lot of food. But, Hizashi usually made such a big deal about the parties he threw. She was hardly dress to…
Her eyes widened, hand coming to her chest. She wasn’t even wearing a bra! Blood draining from her face, she glanced at Shouta; but he thankful wasn’t looking at her. Maybe he hadn’t noticed.
“What?” Hizashi asked, even as he waved off her rebuke. “As if Shouta's some inept virgin. He’s probably a beast in bed. Ain’t that right, Shou?”
Shouta turned toward the door. “I think I should go.”
Hizashi’s winning smile fell away. “Sit down.” Before anyone could catch or question the turn, a brilliant grin was back in place. “You agreed to come to my party and are here. You owe me, Shouta.”
You owe me for trying to steal me girl, he thought.
A knock on the door sounded.
“Food’s here! I’ll get it!” Hizashi plucked the money from Teris’ hand and dashed to the door.
Stepping to Shouta, Teris apologized. “Sorry.”
Though he knew she was apologizing about Hizashi, Shouta couldn’t help but wonder if she was also apologizing for ignoring him these past two weeks.
Teris’ lips pressed together, uncomfortable under Shouta's scrutinizing gaze. What was he thinking? What must he think of her? Surely he thought less of her for what almost happened between them. After all, she was with his best friend.
“How have you been?” Shouta questioned, softly.
Teris shivered at the quiet, deep timber of his voice. Why was she so easy when it came to him? Even Shouta's damned voice did things to her.
“Good. Busy.” She clipped.
“Maybe now that the school year’s over you’ll be less busy and we can have a chance to talk.”
Teris’ mouth opened, thinking to play dumb; but changed her mind fearing that he would explain if she did. This was Aizawa Shouta after all. The man was nothing if not forthright. She changed the subject instead.
“Any idea what he’s up to?” She asked, referring to Hizashi.
Shouta's eyes scanned hers. Why was she closing herself off from him? Was she afraid he didn’t care for her in return? Had he not made his affection clear enough the night they almost kissed?
“Babe, I know I said Shou must be a beast in the sack but you gotta beast of your own. Quit tryin’ ta get him to ravage you and put a bra on, please.”
“Shit!” Teris crossed her arms, ducked her head, and hurried away.
Hizashi admired her ass for a moment before watching Shouta try not to do the same. “She’s got great tits, doesn’t she? Her ass and legs are killer too. Hell! Her whole body’s bangin’.”
Shouta’s head dipped, a pouting frown pulling at his lips before he remembered he wasn’t wearing his capture weapon. His internal curse echoed Teris’. Shit.
Turning toward the dining room, Shouta grumbled. “Is it always about sex with you?”
Hizashi followed with the food. “When you gotta a girl like that it is. You should give it try.”
Shouta's shoulders tensed. He wanted to, and would; but he didn’t expect Hizashi to-- Shit, he thought again. He was so focused on Teris that he failed to realize Hizashi wasn’t referring to her and sex, but that he should try finding a girlfriend.
Hizashi grinned. Too easy, he thought, setting down the food. “Hey. You wanna unpack this for me while I get us some drinks?”
“So... It’s just going to be the three of us?” Shouta asked.
“Yeah. That isn’t a problem, is it?”
Shouta looked at his friend wondering what Hizashi was up to.
Hizashi looked back and smiled. “I know how you hate large, loud groups and thought you’d be more at ease with this.”
Shouta’s eyes turned away in guilt. “You’re a good friend, Hizashi.”
Yeah? Then why did you try and kiss my girl? Hizashi silently demanded. Guess you’re not as good a friend as I thought.
He forced his wavering smile in place. “I’ll be right back with those drinks.”
Teris considered putting on a bit of make-up and fixing her hair in something other than a messy ponytail, but quickly scrapped the idea. If this were one of Hizashi's proper party’s she would've prepared herself like that; but with no time, and just them and Shouta, it would look too much like she was trying to impress.
Damn it. Why didn’t Hizashi tell her he had invited Shouta over? It had been awkward and difficult enough seeing Shouta at school; something she had tried desperately to avoid doing.
After the near kiss she had been thankful that, at Hizashi's urging, she had informed scheduling and Shouta several weeks ago that she wouldn’t be patrolling this weekend. It would give her time to figure out what to do.
The answer should've been simple. Stop patrolling with Eraserhead. But, she couldn’t bring herself to do that. She liked patrolling with him. More than that, she liked the time alone with him. That in itself should've made her call an end to it.
She was such a weak, selfish, stupid person. She--
“Ris Wren! You comin’?”
“Yeah!” Teris called back, shrugging on a properly fitted t-shirt and buttoning her jeans.
She hadn’t put on anything nice, just some causal clothes she would’ve run out to the store in. It wouldn’t look like she was trying too hard. Would it?
“Smells good.” She took a seat at the opposite side of the table from Shouta, leaving the chair across from him open for Hizashi to sit in.
“I hope so. I put a lot of effort into calling and ordering.” Hizashi joked, appearing from the kitchen with three bottles of beer.
“Can I just have a glass of water?” Shouta requested. Even though a single beer wouldn’t affect him, he didn’t want to chance anything muddling his mind.
Hizashi looked wounded. “But I bought stout just for you.”
Shouta sighed and took the beer; mentally cursing how his guilt over almost kissing Teris while she was still with Hizashi was making him more agreeable than normal to Hizashi's pressuring ways.
Sitting down, Hizashi called. “Hey, Shou. Come on around and sit at the head of the table. It’ll feel more intimate that way.”
Heaving another sigh, Shouta stood. Taking up the bottle of beer and plate, he moved to Hizashi's right.
“Ah, no! Not there. The other side. That chair’s wobbly.”
Teris turned to Hizashi, brows knitted together. “Since when?”
Rubbing the back of his neck, Hizashi chuckled and feigned. “I… uh… I may have messed it up leaning back too far.”
Shouta moved to the other head of the table and lifted a questioning eyebrow at Hizashi. He would only humor his friend so much. Once he sat down, he wasn’t getting up and moving again.
“Yeah. Perfect!” Hizashi grinned slinging his arm over the back of Teris’ chair. “Nice and cozy.”
Shouta tucked in at Teris’ left.
Once served, Hizashi lifted his drink and toasted. “To the end of another successful school year!”
Dinner was a lot less awkward than Teris had expected. Then again Hizashi’s bright cheeriness could put anyone at ease. The Voice Hero had carried most of the conversation, a well known talent of his; but made sure to keep Shouta and Teris engaged by prodding them to share and tell some story or another.
Shouta wasn’t even halfway through his second beer when Hizashi uncapped and placed a third in front of him.
“You trying to get me drunk, Yamada?” Shouta arched a wry brow, the dinner having brought out a relaxed lightness in him.
Hizashi laughed. “We both know it’ll take more than beer to get you drunk. But if you want…” He moved back to the kitchen collecting three glasses and bringing out a bottle of the good stuff.
“No.” Shouta shook his head, but Hizashi was already serving them.
“Whatcha worried about? It’s not like I have a statue for you to try an’ apprehend.” Hizashi teased, pushing a too full glass over to him.
Teris looked between the two, laughing.
Shouta's eyes narrowed. “That didn’t happen.”
Hizashi reached for his phone. “Do I have to find the video?”
“I wanna see it!” Teris raised her hand.
“I told you to delete--”
Hizashi held up placating hands. “I did! I did.” He nudged the glass of alcohol closer to Shouta. “Come on, man. Let lose. Do it as a treat for my girl. Don’t think she’s ever seen you totally let your hair down.” He turned to Teris. “Wouldn’t you like to see what you’ve been missin’, Baby? See what kind of animal Shouta really is?” Before she could respond, he focused back on Shouta. “It’ll be fun! You can even sleepover if it turns out to be too much for ya.” Hizashi winked, wearing a sly smile. He made a show of leaving his phone on the table and took a step back. “I promise I won’t record anything that goes down tonight.”
Shouta picked up the glass and took a slow sip.
Hizashi’s phone rang and he excused himself to take the call, telling Teris to leave the mess.
Never one to like being told what to do, Teris gathered the takeout boxes and headed to the kitchen to pack-up the leftovers.
Shouta stacked the plates, carrying them and the empty bottles of beer to the kitchen. Setting them on the counter-top, he stepped behind Teris. “We need to talk.”
Startled by the nearness of his voice, Teris jumped and spun around. “Shit, Shouta. Someone needs to put a bell on you.”
Shouta chuckled lowly, she had said the same thing many a time in their shared dreams.
Teris’ breath hitched, legs squeezing together at the small smile and deep, rumbling laugh.
She really did have it bad for him if such a simple thing could cause such a reaction in her. What the hell had she been thinking, imagining she could continue their patrols together? Their joint patrols needed to end now, before someone got hurt. Before she did something even more stupid than nearly kissing Shouta, and lost Hizashi. She needed to distance herself from Shouta as much as possible and hope that her love for him dissipated. You distanced yourself from him for seven years in a completely different city and that love didn’t go away, she thought.
“There—“ Teris shuffled on her feet and cleared her throat. “There’s nothing to talk about.”
Shouta blinked. His hand reached toward her, mouth opening to dispute.
“Hey, Ris!” Hizashi ducked his head into the kitchen. “I thought I told you to leave all that.”
She and Shouta backed quickly away from each other.
Teris guiltily turning back to the leftover food. “Yeah. Sorry.”
Hizashi's heart twisted. Maybe she and Shouta had been doing stuff behind his back. If that was the case then his plan wouldn’t work. The chances of if working were already slim; but he had to try. As bad a taste as the idea left in his mouth, it sat far better than Nemuri's suggestion, which he would only go with as a last resort. He didn’t want to share her. Teris was his girl. But if it meant keeping her...
Despite the comfortable furniture, the coffee table had been pushed to the side allowing them to sit on the living room floor. Time passed with more shared stories and laughter.
Hizashi continued to try and push more alcohol on Shouta. But by the third time Hizashi refilled his less than half downed drink, Shouta had simply stopped sipping from it altogether.
Maybe it was because he was now certain of Teris’ returned affection; but Shouta found it even more difficult to bear seeing Hizashi hang on and kiss her. It had been difficult enough before. In truth, these past three years had been an unending torment; especially this last year.
Wonderful as it had been to see and work with his Love, it also made the wound of her being with Hizashi that much worse. Seeing and being able to talk with Teris but not touch or be with her had been a constant, torturous test of his strength and control. And, seeing Hizashi and Teris together at work had been a constant visual reminder that the woman he loved and was meant to be with was dating and living with his best friend.
Shouta had tried to comfort himself with the fact that Teris was his soulmate, and that Hizashi's relationship with her would never last. He had told himself that he could and would be patient. That for the sake of his friendship with Hizashi, he would silently suffer and wait for Teris to realize she didn’t belong with Hizashi, and break up with him. But now that he knew Teris returned his affection, Shouta’s will to wait was crumbling to dust.
His brain tried to reason that he had waited this long for friendships sake, he could wait a bit longer. But Shouta's heart wasn’t having it. He wanted Teris now. To hell with reason. To hell with friendship. Teris was his soulmate. His love. She belonged with him, and he with her, and he was done waiting.
“How ‘bout a game of Truth or Dare?” Hizashi proposed.
“No.” Shouta and Teris said in unison.
“Come on. It’ll be fun!” Hizashi cajoled. He straightened and went on before they could argue. “I’ll start. Ris, I dare you to kiss me.”
“You’re suppose to give me a choice of truth or dare, Zashi.”
“Does that mean you don’t wanna kiss me?” Hizashi leaned forward, puckering his lips.
Teris shook her head, smiling, and humored her boyfriend with a quick peck.
Shouta's heart squeezed. What if he was wrong? What if she wasn’t going to break-up with Hizashi? What if he had misunderstood the entire end of that night and she hadn’t wanted to kiss him in return? What if she didn’t love him at all? She had said in the kitchen that there was nothing for them to talk about...
Teris started to pull away when one of Hizashi’s hands grabbed the back of her neck, the other cupping her face. He led her back to him taking the long, tongued kiss he wanted.
Mid kiss, Hizashi's eyes opened and flicked to Shouta, finding him watching. The blonde smiled against Teris’ lips, making a show of licking into her mouth.
Shouta’s eyes lowered, head turning away. Suddenly getting a bit drunk and losing some control didn’t sound so bad. He took a deep swig of liquor.
Hizashi pulled away, lips wet and grinning. “Your turn, Babe.”
Chest heaving from the devouring kiss, Teris sucked in a ragged breath. “Fine. I dare you to try and keep your hands to yourself.”
“That’s not how the game goes, Babe! You’re suppose to ask me truth or dare.”
“Like you ask?” She challenged playfully, arching a brow.
“Fair enough.” Hizashi allowed. “I’ll do my best. But no promises! Go, Shou. It’s your turn.”
“I dare you to find another game.” Shouta muttered.
“Aw! Come on, man! This’ll be fun.” Hizashi’s eyebrows wiggled, a sly knowing grin beaming at his friend. “You’re gonna love this game by the time we’re through. I swear it.”
“Doubtful.” Shouta grumbled.
Shouta sighed, head tilting back to stare at the ceiling. What he really wanted to do if Hizashi chose truth was ask if he and Nemuri had really had a friends with benefits thing going on. But that would've been cruel and unfair. Especially since he knew exactly how Teris would respond to learning such a thing had existed between her boyfriend and best girlfriend, no matter how long ago the deal had ended.
The game progressed with easy and hard dares and truths. While it was somewhat fun, Shouta wouldn’t have said he loved it, a point he was ready to tell Hizashi as the game started to wane.
“Alright! Final round.” Hizashi announced, sinister glint hidden behind his bright green eyes. “Shou, I dare you to drink what’s left of this bottle.”
Shouta eyed the mostly full bottle of alcohol Hizashi held up. What was his friend trying to do? Kill him?
“You’re suppose to ask truth or dare.” Shouta said.
“Right. Sorry. Truth or dare?” Hizashi asked.
“Truth.” Shouta said, not wanting to down a bottle of liquor.
“Alright.” Hizashi set down the bottle and tapped his chin, pretending to think. “Ooo! I got it.” He grinned at Shouta, eyes sparkling. “It’s a good one. You ready?”
Shouta rolled his eyes. “Yeah. I’m ready.”
“You sure? It’s a real doozy.”
Shouta bit back a sigh. “Zashi. Just--”
“Do you wanna kiss my girl?” Hizashi asked.
Teris choked on her drink.
Shouta’s face flushed, ringing ears drowning out everything but his thundering pulse.
“Wha—“ Shouta stared, sure he had misheard Hizashi. “What?”
Returning stare unwavering, Hizashi said. “My girl. You know, Teris. Do you wanna kiss her?”
“Hi—zashi…” Teris numbly set down her drink, whatever buzz she had gone in an instant.
Yes. Shouta thought. His eyes squeezed shut, feeling as if he had drunk way more than he had. This had to be some kind of joke. What kind of game was Hizashi playing at? Or was it not a game? Had Hizashi seen his love for Teris? Was this his way of confronting him? Or maybe Hizashi had seen Teris’ care for him, and was attempting to try to guilt and keep her.
Shouta held his hand out for the bottle Hizashi had wanted him to drink. “Dare.”
Hizashi considered handing it to him; but he had already tipped his hand. Shouta wouldn’t be getting drunk tonight. He would just have to hope that Shouta's lacking experience was enough to turn Teris off. That she would see what Shouta had to offer and find it wanting; and stay with him, forgetting all about Shouta.
“I dare you to kiss her.” Hizashi said, voice friendly and firm despite his dark churning thoughts.
The two men stared at each other.
“Zashi…” Teris tendered.
Hizashi's eyes never left Shouta's. He tilted his head toward Teris. “Go ahead. Do it, Shou. I dare you to kiss her.”
As badly as he wanted to, Shouta didn’t move. He had waited this long to kiss Teris. He could wait a while longer. There would be time enough for that after she broke-up with Hizashi. If she broke-up with Hizashi, he thought. Teris’ earlier words replayed in his mind. There’s nothing to talk about.
Shouta shook his head. “You don’t know what you’re saying.”
“I know exactly what I’m sayin’.” Hizashi told. “You wanna do it. Don’t ya? Been wanting to do it real bad for a while now. Heck. I wouldn’t be surprised if you haven’t tried kissin’ her during your joint patrols.”
Onyx eyes sparking, Shouta rose to his knees. “Alight.”
Shouta looked to Teris, sharp eyes softening.
Hizashi didn’t look at his girlfriend. Couldn’t look at her.
Sniffing, Hizashi jutted a chin toward Shouta. “Go on, Babe. You don’t wanna be the reason Shouta loses, do ya?”
Teris glanced between the two men, lost as to how they got here.
Shouta's heart seized at Hizashi's words. No. He comforted himself. He wouldn’t lose her. He and Teris were soulmates. They were meant to be together.
Jaw aching, Hizashi swallowed the bile in his throat and told. “How this ends all depends on you, Ris. You decide how this goes. Does Shouta lose, and I win? Or…”
Or? Or what, Teris wondered. This was just a game that had gone too far. Why did Hizashi always have to take everything too far?
Kissing Shouta in front of Hizashi… It’s no worse than kissing Shouta in front of the apartment complex, her inner voice argued. That didn’t happen, she thought firmly. We didn’t kiss. But you would have, she accused herself. You wanted to. You would have kissed Shouta if Hizashi hadn’t called. But Hizashi had called. Shouta and I didn’t kiss. And now you have another chance. You can kiss Shouta here and now, and do it with Hizashi's blessing. You know you want to.
This was wrong, she told herself. It would all end horribly wrong. Why was she the only one questioning this? She couldn’t go along with this, no matter how much she wanted to. Even if Hizashi allowed it, and Shouta was willing to go along with it, she had to say no. She had to be the voice of reason. This wouldn’t end well.
Despite her thoughts, Teris moved to kneel in front of Shouta. Her eyes searched his. Were they really going to do this? Kiss on a dare in front of Hizashi?
Shouta's gaze darted over her face. He should wait. He had let Hizashi get to him and moved, but he could still stop this. He could still wait. But he didn’t want to wait. He was tired of waiting. And if Teris meant what she said, that she thought they didn’t have anything to talk about, who knows how much longer he would have to wait.
Was it better to kiss her now? Shouta wondered. To have a taste and possibly be denied anymore for who knew how long? Would he be able to stand it if he had to wait any longer? Would he be able to live with himself if he didn’t take this chance? She was his, and he was hers. They belonged together. He had been patience enough.
Shouta's hand lifted, knuckles tenderly grazing along her cheek. His other hand moved, tucking her hair back. She was beautiful. Perfect. Amazing. He couldn’t wait any longer. He had to--
Hizashi cleared his throat.
Shouta's eyes widened a fraction, heart racing. What if Hizashi realized how stupid this was and told him to stop? What if Teris didn’t break-up with Hizashi and it was months, or years before he got another chance? What if kissing her was the key to making her remember their shared dreams?
Shouta's hands clasped her face. His head tilted.
Teris gasped softly at the sudden but gentle press of Shouta's lips. She stared at his closed eyes for a fraction of a second then her eyes slipped closed. Her hand rose, gripping the front of Shouta’s shirt, the other grasping his shoulder.
Slowly, Shouta's lips began to move.
Teris pressed against him, lips moving with his.
She tasted of alcohol and the sweet bun she had snacked on for dessert, and something else. Something Shouta could only describe as distinctly her. It was glorious and he needed more.
The scrape of Shouta's stubble was oddly rough yet soft. It was nicer than she had imagined and, dare she say, addictive. Added with his tender calloused hands caressing her neck and face... It was glorious and she wanted more.
Her hand tugged at his shirt wanting, needing him closer.
Shouta’s body leaned in, pressing firmly against her. One hand dropped and snaked around her waist. His tongue licked at her lips asking for entry.
Hand burying in his hair, Teris’ lips readily parted.
Shouta’s tongue slid in with a groan.
Teris moaned around his tongue, letting him explore the hot wet cavern of her mouth.
Unblinking, Hizashi watched his best friend and girlfriend kiss.
In the seconds that felt like eternity two things became painfully clear to the Voice Hero. The first, there was no way his plan would work. Teris wouldn’t be turned off by any virgin blundering Shouta displayed, if Shouta displayed any at all. And the second, that if he didn’t go with Nemuri's suggestion, Hizashi would most certainly lose the woman he called his.
Light headed, Teris pulled back, cursing her lungs need for air.
Just as out of breath as she, Shouta's broad chest rose and fell with heavy gasps.
Panting, they stared into each others eyes; Hizashi forgotten. Until…
“Kiss her again.”
Comments and/or re-blogs are most appreciated.
As always, an extra special thank you to @inorganicone2230 for their encouragement and friendship. Also for them helping proofread the draft of this chapter. This fic was my personal guilty pleasure, and without them never be getting posted.
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Summary: Near the end of four years spent apart—Sebastian at university in Paris and Blaine in New York, respectively—Sebastian decides to write a letter to his love to show just how grateful he is to have him in his life.
Note: For context, Seblaine get together after the canon klaine breakup in season four before going off to college in different cities.
Written for @asongalook for the @seblainegiftexchange! You mentioned liking the idea of pen pals—hope you enjoy this little letter I wrote from Sebastian’s pov! At the end is a coordinating playlist :)
Do you remember the first time you walked down the stairs at Dalton? I remember the first time I did—in fact, I doubt I will ever forget it.
I never told you this, but my very first day at Dalton was before you transferred to McKinley. I remember moving down those spiral stairs amidst a rush of other students, everyone hurrying to the senior commons. The sound of an angelic baritone singing a top 40 hit, backed up by a chorus of voices, was echoing through the halls. I never did like that song when I heard it on the radio, but that day when I heard you singing, I started to like it just a little bit.
I never did make it to that performance, I was late for a meeting with the vice principal, one I had considered skipping at the time, but I’ll never forget hearing that voice, clear as water and smooth as butter.
I was so bummed the next week after my warblers audition to find out that the owner of that angelic voice had left Dalton—if only I had known that we would one day be united after all, then maybe I might not have been so down. Although, as the sordid tale goes, I went on to mess that all up, but lucky for me, you have the kindest heart and gave me another chance.
Not many people would have done that, not after a slew of insults and a cherry flavored trip to the hospital—and not only did you forgive me, but you went on to love me, too. You truly are one of a kind, Blaine Anderson.
I know all of that was years ago now. But I guess with the passing of time, I’ve turned into a nostalgic old sap. We’re both in our final year of college, nearing graduation. Soon I’ll be flying to New York to join you in our new apartment we have lined up, and we’ll finally adopt that dog you have been wanting for so, so long. Everything is going to change so much and so fast, and I can’t wait.
But before we start our life together, finally, I just wanted to write you a letter while I’m still thousands of miles away. The movies say it’s supposed to be romantic or something to send love letters or be pen pals or whatever, and we both know you’re a sucker for a good romcom (feel free to send back a letter about how much you miss me, killer. Or even an email will suffice—be the Meg Ryan to my Tom Hanks?).
Thank you for being my romcom happy beginning, Blaine. I say beginning because our ending isn’t here yet, and hopefully it never comes. I plan on having an on-going love story with you. I always hated mushy gushy love stuff but you made me see the light in it all. You’re the only person who can turn my sour attitude sweet—I think your sweetness is just to overpowering.
Paris is great, school is good. I know we’ll talk more in depth about all of that over the phone or FaceTime, but I’ll send you warm wishes here for your final classes in New York. What were we thinking going to universities in separate countries? It’s wild we made it through but I’m not too surprised because I know just how much I love you (and I know you love me, too, even when I drive you crazy. You’re probably rolling your eyes as you read this.).
Year four, and I still haven’t gotten used to not see you every day but soon enough I won’t have to be used to it anymore. Can’t wait to wake up next to you for the rest of forever.
Tell New York I’ll be there soon.
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Since you're 28, I guess you have job?
So, how did you get a job
And is it the job you were trying to get, like, is it what you wanted when you were in your college years?
A worried college student
When I got my first job, it took a lot of applications. But the first thing I told my parents after graduation was that I was taking a month off. I’d been through so much stress and everything and I told them to give me a month break and then I’d throw myself into job searching. And that really helped reset my head!
Neither my job then nor my job now align with my major but honestly most people don’t find jobs within the exact field they studied in nowadays. I did a lot of college recruiting at the companies I worked for and many are just looking to see that you completed a degree (shows you have a set of skills and ability to learn and work with others, meet a deadline, etc) and did it well, which is why I push so hard for majoring in something you’re passionate about that you’ll do well with. A higher GPA can look more impressive for the job you’re applying for than the major itself.
Also if you’re willing to relocate, your chances of finding a job you like go up 1000%. If you’re young and you can afford it (many companies give a relocation bonus too) then do it. Most people I know my age are working in a different state than they grew up in/went to school in and I don’t know anyone who fully regrets it. You learn a lot, including independence and financial management, it helps you grow up a ton.
So don’t worry about trying to find something exactly in your field. Find something you wouldn’t mind doing, especially for your first job. Something that uses your strengths and hopefully a company that’s willing to invest in you through training and such. Once you have one professional (post-college) job on your resume then that becomes the main focal point from then on, so any future jobs will focus more on your work than what you did at school. For that reason you want to find a first job that’ll really help you grow, learn to work in a professional environment, and give you diverse experiences.
Once you start looking for jobs, commit to it. Looking for work is a job in itself. You might have to submit 100s of applications — don’t let that get you down. My biggest tips would be to take advantage of any resumé help being offered, to do practice interviews so you become comfortable with it, and to stay organized.
1) Make multiple versions of your resume depending on the fields you applied for. I was applying for recruiting, analyst, and marketing roles, primarily, and I had different resumes for each of those fields. I fine tuned them to show off specific skills for each field, highlighting certain functions or leadership roles that aligned with the job. Look at examples online and play around with your formatting. Your resume for your first job shouldn’t be more than one page — most recruiters won’t even look past the first page, so only keep what’s important. But don’t forget that you can adjust margins and reduce font size to make everything fit.
1a) I can’t stand cover letters but you’ll probably need them. Look at examples to make sure it looks like you want it to and make a template that you can easily fill out for each application so you don’t have to spend too much time on it. But again, you can make specific versions depending on what kinds of jobs you’re applying for. And always proofread before you send to make sure you have the right company and job mentioned on there!!
2) Do practice interviews with anyone you can. You need to become familiar with the pressure and situation. Get your family, friends, professors, counselors, anyone that’s willing to help to do it. Before you sit down for an interview, write out all the questions you think they might ask and practice your responses!! This really helps! It’ll make you sound more confident and prepared as well. Also always have at least one question to ask the recruiter. Ask them about what they like about the company, or what challenges they’ve faced and overcome in their role, something like that.
2a) I know this seems obvious but dress up for the interviews, even if it’s remote. It shows that you’re putting in effort. If you’re remote then make sure you have good lighting & a plain/non-distracting background. Keep your phone on silent and stay engaged when they’re speaking.
3) Make a spreadsheet to keep track of where you applied, when you did it, who you talked to, etc. Track which resume/cover letter you used as well and what kind of job it is. ALWAYS SEND A THANK YOU EMAIL RIGHT AFTER THE INTERVIEW. This makes an impression and keeps you on their mind. When it comes to following up, I think a week is a decent time to send an email out. If you don’t get a reply then, send another follow up in a couple weeks. Past that if they don’t reply (sucky of them tbh) then I’d assume you didn’t get the job. But that’s fine! Keep going at it!
3a) Don’t be afraid to fight for your pay. It can be really anxiety inducing and stressful but especially if you see a similar job pay more than the job you’re applying for, you have every right to request more pay. DON’T say yes to the first salary offered — that was a mistake I made. It never hurts to give a higher salary request, you’ll almost always get an offer higher than what they initially started with.
Lastly, don’t be disheartened. Just because you didn’t get a job doesn’t mean you won’t get a similar one or another one within the same company. Honestly I used to just sit and apply for every open relevant position in a company if the company was good because that makes a big difference. Keep your morale up. It never hurts to apply, even if you’re underqualified. You never know. Be confident in your skills!
And I’ll also say, this may not be something everyone can find or be picky about, but if you can find a job that has good benefits, if the company is great, go for it. Put as much as you can into your retirement — if you can, commit to the max percentage, especially if your company matches your contribution. If they give you insurance, take advantage of it. Go for dental and vision checkups, visit your doctor. Don’t put this off until you lose it. Take advantage of EVERYTHING your company offers. Trainings, expos, employee groups, etc. These all help develop your professional experience.
I hope this helps!!
Please don’t hesitate to ask if you have any other questions! Good luck & I believe in you!!
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This is not me having impostor syndrome. I was an impostor…I was good enough just hadn’t learned enough. And after about 5 years I realized I was undercooked, and I cooked myself. So I now know I am good enough. But in 1995 and 1996, all I was was slick, well-spoken, funny–when I talk I tend to sound like I know what I’m talking about, but the smarter graduate students could tell that I didn’t.
That’s John McWhorter describing himself early in his academic career, but he might as well be describing me at this point in my career doing what I’m currently doing.
Which is...what exactly?
I have to think in terms of the next ten to fifteen years for my career. The world is going to leave me behind if I don’t cook myself. It is past time for me to cook myself.
I mean, the world is not literally going to leave me behind if I don’t develop more technical skills at work. I’ll live. But the ability to continue to make the amount of money I am making will go away at some point if I don’t grow.
And I want to do interesting things to make money, not boring accounting-adjacent things that I have somehow lucked myself into not doing by getting into my current role.
I have backed my way into a role that is interesting-adjacent. I shouldn’t squander this opportunity. Being in an interesting-adjacent role allows me the space and creates the justification for me to spend some time training on the interesting because it’s relevant to my role.
And hopefully my interesting-adjacent role plus the right training leads to interesting roles.
Hopefully is a weak word in corporate communication. I still use it from time to time. But whenever I write it in an email like, “hopefully when we do this thing, this other thing will happen,” I hear a conglomeration of past bosses’ voices responding with, “let’s not hope, let’s know for sure or at least be reasonably confident that other thing will happen if we do this thing.”
But I can’t know for sure. All I can do is try. Fight against my natural inclination for patience and start embracing a little bit more of that bias to action.
There are plenty of recipes out there. Time to experiment with a few of them. Come up with a few of my own. Time to cook myself.
This will be the last episode for this series of self-rediscovery... I thought that it would be nice to call this as “Growing Up” as this episode talks about how the self steps out into the real world of career, community, and society just like a typical case of a person “growing up”.
“It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are.” — E.E. Cummings
Changes and transitions are inevitable in our life, we go through it everyday and its not just us, the whole world changes and undergoes different transitions to become where it is now. As a kid, I we were always asked the million-dollar question “what do you wanna be when you grow up?” A surgeon, a singer, an artist, a teacher, an inspiration, or maybe just somebody. It was a question I still ask myself until now, who do I really wanna be? A girl who works from 9 to 5? A girl who busts her ass off studying? Or a girl who was able to become somebody?
You see, “work” is an important factor that shapes the self, it has become a title where people can easily identify you as, “uy diba yung anak ni pare yan na nurse oh”. Because of this title, we now get used to the mindset that after graduation we need to have great jobs to be happy and not achieving this causes people to loathe themselves, feel disappointed, and lose the sense who they are in a worst-case scenario. As much as work influences self-concept, it also greatly influences a country in terms of power and nation-building. It is a driving force that shapes a productive economy to fulfil social and economic realities people create. As important as this seems, the case of work in the Philippines is bad, not all have the power to go to school in order to get jobs and not all have great backgrounds and land jobs.
Work is often associated with career. Career talks about the lifelong progression of continuous learning and work including formal and informal roles that help the self in gaining that “self-development” and progress we all hope to aim. Although career is progress, vocation talks about the desired “work”. While talking about career, experts have proposed theories about our career development and how our careers are influenced by other factors. As we talked about decision-making in previous episodes, we still continue to point out that there are a lot of factors that could influence our decisions in life including experiences, peers, family, love, pressure, standards of the society and many more.
This module was the module that I could really relate to, as I am still working on paving a path for myself in terms of career and life in general, this really helped me understand and think about how I want to focus on the things that I really like and how not to entirely rely my career in the hands of others. Although this will be the end of our self-rediscovery podcast, I hope you have learned things you didn’t know before and hopefully I can continue to update you about my status in terms of SELF-REDISCOVERY!
Summer, Year 7: University, Day 3
My last group of incoming freshmen for the summer are: Prince Emmett, Lorraine and Lucius Durden, and Prince Virgil. I think I moved them in with my couples since some of them will be graduating and moving out soon.
After they blow out the candles, they stand around for awhile, looking at each other like, “Are we really doing this?”
They decide to make the leap to young adulthood.
After cake, Lucius and Virgil go play in the reeds at the far edge of the lot.
The older students give them some inspirational words after class about shooting for the stars.
Before I moved all of my households into the second university apartment lot, this random apartment dweller broke in the karaoke machine.
And this other random apartment dweller tried to make a move on Olivia, but she wasn’t having it.
Calvin always seems to be the first to check out the pool. (I decorated this one differently than the other one, but I think I like it too.)
Lots of romances are blooming. Prince Calvin and Miranda Cade have become quite an item.
So are Leonardo and AIsha.
Why do you all think this tiny entryway is the best spot to play kicky bag? Take it to either of the larger rooms on either side of you or better yet, outside.
Chastity finds a quiet corner to get away from it all.
Duke seems to share her idea and occupies the bench next to her. (I moved Duke in to be with Calvin and checked for any other pets that would miss their young adult owners. I moved Virginia in with Olivia and discovered she’s really close to Leonardo too. As soon as I had two dogs in the same household, I immediately thought puppies, but then I noticed they had the same markings and discovered they were half-siblings, so nevermind.)
Oh no, here comes trouble. Lorraine seems to have trouble getting along with others and Nova is itching for a fight.
That didn’t take long.
At least Lorraine has one person that she gets along with.
Oh! I guess they more than get along . . .
There are romantic couples popping up everywhere (and I’m glad to see it!) Vlad and Chastity struggle to find time together to date, but hopefully they can make it work.
Erik stops by and shares a romantic dance with Lila. (This is after he slept with Bianca, by the way, and while he still has the want to marry Rona . . .)
Sadie serenades her fiance, Silas.
I was going to limit the double beds in my university residences, but the students are taking advantage of the ones I did put in. Lorraine and Leonardo are getting cozy in one bedroom while Amira and Virgil take the room next door.
I am so confused on my dates and what they mean right now. But Colette and Silas finish up their education at the end of the round (or beginning of the next, since it switched over to fall in the early morning hours) and will be starting their adult lives on the first day of fall.
Colette graduated with a 1.9 in economics. She will be moving back to her family’s house as their heir. She and Leila are still going steady from their teen years, so they may be getting married and if they do, they would probably move into Leila’s family home (since she is also the heir and from a more prominent household.)
Silas graduated with a 2.4 in political science. Since I have these larger apartment lots now, I think he might stay on the university lot until his fiancee, Sadie graduates later in the fall. Since she is not an heir, I’m not sure where they will end up after graduation. I will probably have them move into a middle class apartment.
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