#btw i guess the only shadowhunter thing that might need explaining is energy runes

[kuiinncedes]

head back laughing like a little kid

idk why i’m formatting this like my other longer fic but . i thought of the lyric as a title and i really liked it lol (from taylor swift’s “begin again”)

here is some sleep-deprived shadowhunter!quinntina from the brain of a sleep-deprived jeanne :) 

it’s not really that relevant but this is kind of in the same verse as my other shadowhunter fics and lmk if anyone wants/needs explanation of shadowhunty stuff :P none of it is very relevant to the plot or anything in this one tho

and pls i wrote this in like an hour and barely proofread it but i’m just tired and have been wanting to write some quinntina again for so longgggggg so i finally did and i’m just gonna post it lol

fully under the cut because idk where to put the cut but yeah here’s an attempt at some fluff my dudes <3

***

Tina falls asleep on Quinn halfway through Monthly Columbus Institute Movie Night… or whatever they’re calling it. Her head lands softly on Quinn’s shoulder and Quinn shifts slightly to a more comfortable position, wrapping her arm around Tina’s shoulders. She ignores the glances of her friends, who are looking at her as if they aren’t the same brand of sappy and adorable with their significant others, and instead leans her cheek on the top of Tina’s head.

She guesses she falls asleep too. The next thing she knows, she wakes up to Kurt poking her like he’s five years old again. 

“Stop,” she grumbles, pushing his hand away but trying not to jostle Tina too much.

“Movie’s done. Go to bed.”

“You’re my parabatai, not my mom.” She makes another annoyed noise under her breath and Kurt chuckles, getting the point and making his way to the doorway where Blaine waits for him, and they leave the library together. 

Quinn starts to wake up a little more, but Tina’s still fast asleep, mouth slightly open and body completely relaxed but curled into Quinn’s. She smiles, brushing some strands of Tina’s black hair away from her face and pressing her lips to her forehead. 

“Hey,” she whispers, shrugging her shoulder a little but not wanting to jostle Tina too much. It does the trick - Tina’s always been a light sleeper - and Tina stirs, blinking her eyes open slowly. “Hey sleepyhead,” Quinn says, grinning, and kisses the tip of Tina’s nose.

Tina scrunches her nose and snuggles further into Quinn’s side. “Hey,” she answers, voice low. Her eyes slide shut again and her lips curl upward, a little playfully.

Quinn’s smile grows. “Planning to go to bed tonight? Why are you so wiped out?”

Tina hums. “Stayed up last night, used some Energy runes, had patrol, whatever.” She buries her face in Quinn’s neck. “I’m tired.”

“I can see that.”

Tina sticks out her tongue. Against Quinn’s neck. Who jumps slightly and squeaks in surprise. “You are two years old!” she laughs. “Tina!” 

Tina giggles and Quinn can feel it against the skin between her neck and shoulder. 

“Come on,” Quinn groans with a laugh, trying to stand up but there’s a whole Shadowhunter sprawled across her. “By the Angel, T, don’t you want to sleep in your bed?” 

“No, this is good.” Her voice is muffled against Quinn’s stomach now, somehow having gotten her to lie down across the couch and piled herself on top of her.

“You’re so annoying.”

“Only for you, baby.”

Quinn smiles so wide at the ceiling, because Raziel, she loves this idiot on her lap.

And if she has to spend the night on the cramped library couches for aforementioned idiot, she will.

(Not tonight, though.)

Quinn pulls Tina towards her, a random leftover Strength rune burning on her arm, and maneuvers her so that she’s carrying her with one arm under Tina’s knees and the other under her arms. 

“This isn’t easy, you know,” Quinn huffs as she stands, and Tina’s body is shaking with laughter as she walks out of the library. Quinn looks down at her and grins again, laughing and saying, “You are such a child when you’re tired.”

“Blame the Energy runes. They leave you burned out.”

“Oh, I’ll blame someone.”

“Yeah, you know what? Blame your fucking parabatai, he’s the one who kept me up last night with his new sketches even though he knew I had a day of patrols scheduled -- ” Tina cuts off with a short squeal as Quinn all but tosses her onto the bed, throwing herself on after, and they collapse into a fit of giggling.

Maybe tomorrow will also be an Energy-rune-and-crash kind of day.

#quinntina #tina cohen chang #quinn fabray #glee #glee fic #my ficsssss #basically i'm tina in this fic right now lmao #btw i guess the only shadowhunter thing that might need explaining is energy runes #they basically are like caffeine i guess but make you crash after they're gone #idk if any of this makes sense or is any good #watch me read this tomorrow and be like what the actual fuck lmao #but it's 11:37 pm and i'm happy with it now so imma post it #don't be surprised if i reblog this tomorrow and say i edited it lol :P #anyway if u read this i love u <3 #ok wait i just reread it and have some things i wanted to share lol #kurt and tina doing fashion together once again can be something so personal <3 #this is gonna flop lmao whatever no one's active right now who wants to read this #writing two girls man..... the pronouns i know it got confusing at some points lol and i'm sorry about that #for some reason i'm really against saying stuff like 'the blonde' or 'the other girl' idk i just don't like it so i don't use it #so idk maybe it might be confusing at some points :\ #i think that's it lol so yeah

[ralfstrashcan]

3x15 Reaction / Commentary

........who died and made her queen? Literally no one finds it weird that the newby from a day ago holds announcements and motivational speeches? And I thought vampires don't like swift changes. Guess that was racist of me.

..................?? Literally who has ever denied the vampires entry? Except maybe the shadowhunters to their Institute and the werewolves to their home-restaurant? So she's basically saying “If anyone doesn't want us in their private homes we'll break and enter!” How is no one calling her out on how stupid that is??

hahaha how long did she work on that line?

........? Why? Because up until this point I was under the impression that the Accords where strictly restricted to governing the border between shadow world and mundanes, keeping them separate and protecting mundanes from demon and downworlder attacks alike.

If you care to remember, the whole mess with helping-save-Luke / not-helping-save-Luke in season 1 happens because Alec says shadowhunters aren't allowed to interfere in downworlder affairs, hence saving Luke would be seen as shadowhunters meddling in downworlder business which isn't a thing shadowhunters are allowed to do. It's why him going to lend Magnus his magic to save Luke was a Big Deal for him, because it was basically breaking the rules. It's why he was so against Jace and Clary helping Luke in the first place, because interfering is – at least the way I understood that! – a breach of the Accords, which grant downworlders the right to govern themselves.

In basically all other situations where there are conflicts between downworlders we don't see shadowhunters interfere: Luke beating Taito-or-however-he-was-called into submission, Camille being put into a coffin in the DuMort's cellar indefinitely for reasons. I'd even let myself be convinced that these might be exceptions, since those are ritualized thingies where downworlders decide who gets to rule, and so the shadowhunters aren't allowed to interfere even if their respective election systems consist of battle to the death / whoever wants to revolt revolts.

But how do you then explain all the other instances: Simon getting that Glen werewolf guy into a wheelchair and never facing any consequences except Luke scolding him a little, Simon fighting to the death with Quinn which never gets investigated, and don't even get me started on the seelie queen because she does shit however she wants to whoever she wants, kidnapping random werewolves and holding them hostage, putting marks of cains on unsuspecting daylighters, openly siding with Valentine, etc. and no shadowhunter ever cares about any of this! Not to mention that when Jace first encounters Jordan, he clearly recognizes his authority as Praetor and withdraws, indicating that the Praetor are an established and known organisation who deal with downworder affairs, and shadowhunters have to steer clear of them. Even Kaelie who murdered shadowhunters wasn't sentenced by shadowhunters! She was transfered back to the seelie court after she was captured and the seelie queen dealt with her as she saw fit. To me that simply fortifies that shadowhunters don't govern downworlder-downworlder-relations. If they don't even govern downworlder-shadowhunter-relations.

Besides, if shadowhunters really were supposed to police downworlder-downworlder-relations then please explain to me why the hell it's always treated like an invasion and an insolence if a downworlder dares to come close to the Institute? I mean, shouldn't there be a contact point for them to get in touch with their executive forces? Wtf??

So I guess this is just a random curveball the show throws my way to make this episode's plot work. And really, this is bullshit. I can't accept this. It's one thing to bend and twist portal travel and magic because, whatever, it's magic. But to just 100% turn around their entire frikkin legal system is not something you can just do! No!!

He 100% nicked that horse statue thingy from Magnus's loft to make him feel more at home in his room.

Also, I get that this is a cute parallel with the orange juice, but I also get that this is the show again depriving me of seeing Magnus and Alec actually waking up in bed together and it's NOT OKAY. I just want to finally see Alec “Little Spoon” Lightwood in action, is that too much to ask? Apparently -.-

Also, I have questions. If Alec is just putting on his day clothes.... did he go fetch Magnus's orange juice bare-chested? In his pyjama??? Does he have one with little bows and arrows? I need answers!!!

Rude hahaha, as if living with Magnus was a strenuous, orange-juice-less experience. Kidding, I know he's trying to make living at the Institute palatable to Magnus, quite literally.

I know I wasn't the only one who had severe Pirates of the Caribbean flashbacks at that because after the sneak peek aired I saw a gifset pointing out the parallel XD

Also

MAGNUS'S FACE Btw I think it's sweet that Alec spouts reassurances none of them buys just to make Magnus feel comfortable. Just like it's sweet that he brings Magnus a glass of orange juice that they both proceed to ignore, and to add insult to injury, Magnus gets himself a new one later. Rude.

Okay, so the runes we see here are the nourishment rune (blue), the sharing rune (green) and of course the stamina rune (yellow).... so shadowhunters know to eat real hard. And also... those two tiny tables are supposed to be enough to sustain all those people? With only drinks? Is this some perfidious game where shadowhunters just get drinks and need to feed themselves with nourishment runes? Barbaric.

Yeah I'm in the mood for pancakes now, too, thanks.

I'd like to repeat my question from last episode: If Sentry Guy wasn't planning for his untimely demise, how the hell did he want to hand over that data chip?

Okay but do you realize how amazing and hilarious that is? Because Izzy just came from the serving counter. If she wanted bacon she could have gotten some. But she didn't. To me this looks like routinely stolen food, maybe even just because it's on Jace's plate. This is something that happens regularly and I love it. Need more sibling-y Jace&Izzy interactions honestly!

Also? Izzy missing the piece of bacon on the first try hahaha <3<3<3

Can we please take a moment to appreciate Magnus's absolutely disgusted face and the fact that he carrys that tray with minimal finger contact? Hilarious.

1) I too was wondering why they didn't just go out for breakfast to avoid this situation, so I'm glad they mention that this option has crossed the protagonists' minds as well. 2) Why do they already have beverages on their trays when the refreshment tables with the glasses are off to the side? Possibly so they don't have to run around stupidly?

!!!!!!!!!What other food events are there??????? I need to know okay!!! Also, I think we can all agree that Alec isn't in it for the pancakes but to Prove A Point.

Also, quick question: Who the hell mans the serving counter, who cooks, who cleans the dishes, who buys groceries, who--- etc.

You know what I was just wondering? This is a new outfit, right? Has he moved all of his clothes to Alec's room? Or are they still in this apartment? What's Lorenzo gonna do with all that stuff? And also, do they really expect me to believe Magnus only had this one apartment and literally no other home anywhere? He couldn't have rune!portaled literally anywhere else? He couldn't have stayed with the ever elusive Catarina? Or crashed on Luke's couch since he's not currently using his apartment, being in jail and all? (Though to be fair, we never actually see Luke's apartment so who knows if it even exists? Since they kind of pretend that all werewolves live at the Jade Wolf.) Magnus couldn't have gotten a hotel? I mean he has cash, right? But sure. I'm totally buying that this was the absolutely only option he had.

Izzy is the best and I love her.

So is he supposed to step in as racist, now that Raj is gone? Cuz that'd be unrealistic. I'd buy it if he's miffed that Alec didn't tell him about this, since he's Head of Security and all and could have helped but istg if he reacts badly to Magnus being there I'm gonna flip my shit because Underhill totally ships Malec, okay, why would he react badly?? I'm anxious okay.

“They don't see a lot of warlocks in here.”

HAHAHAHAHAHAH OMG the sass!!!!!

I noticed this in the sneak peek already and honestly, I think the shadowhunters are just angry Magnus is there because he gets to eat fancier stuff than they. I mean, look at him! He even changed the shape of the glass because he's so extra. Love him.

Hahahaha who doesn't want to get a call from jail over breakfast from their father figure. Also I feel like those roles should be reversed XD

I mean, I get it. But thanks, Luke, for not relaying the crucial detail that this was Heidi or at least that Maia is still alive and to contact her for further info since he's in jail, and thus enabling everything that follows. It's not like he told Simon and Maia to drive off with Jordan because he'd handle filling in the Institute on all that happened. Honestly. He's like that one guy in group projects who says he'd do something and then just.. doesn't.

..............................................why Look I don't have the energy to rage about this but wtf Luke. If you think anyone would buy all those fang marks being caused by one person alone, then why not try to get the actual culprit to be imprisoned? Or at least, idk, investigated after to gain some time? Honestly. It's like he wants to go to jail.

Hahahaha okay this is too good an opportunity to pass up, so please go read the dumb drabble I wrote about this exact situation shortly after 3A aired. It's here.

Btw I wanna see that verdict. Because Luke's prints sure as hell aren't on the corpses, and keep in mind any forensic worth a damn should be able to notice that those people died half a day before Luke was found on the site of the crime. Not to mention that since Luke frequented the Jade Wolf it's not exactly surprising he'd want to check up on all his homies there. Not to mention he has zero motive (since his fallout with the pack is so recent nobody not involved would have noticed). And not to mention that he wouldn't even have had time to kill all those people in the 3 minutes after he arrived at the Jade Wolf and before his surveillance team caught up to him. Just, sigh.

Edit: Wow actually they're gonna find his prints all over the corpses because Luke, in his unending wisdom, touched them all to close their eyes. It's like he learned nothing in How To Not Get Imprisoned For Crimes You Didn't Commit 101.

Great Scene. Very relatable.

Though I gotta say I never got the feeling Maia particularly liked any of her packmates since we always only saw them hating on her for dating a vampire and being general idiots, but I'm gonna ignore that right now. It's easily arguable that their happy pack life together wasn't shown because it wasn't relevant to the plot.

And also.... how did they find the Praetor? Isn't their location top secret? How should I imagine that? Was Jordan lying in the backseat half dead, shouting instructions “Turn left now!! No, not your left, my left! Turn right dammit!!” Wtf.

RIGHT BACK AT YOU IZZY FFS. *sigh* Okayyyyy technically Clary killed him, but Izzy didn't react with all the indignated outrage she displays now and I vividly remember this and I already ranted about this at length after 3x04 aired. I'm so done with her attitude on this.

Since when does Alec accept the “I wasn't in control” excuse? Either you were in control, then you go to jail. Or you weren't, then you go in a holding cell because you're an unpredictable danger. In no scenario do you get a free pass. Wtf.

??????????? You get talked into crossing against a red light, not into a frikkin sadistic hostage-taking, what the actual hell???? Why does Alec buy that???? Is he stupid????

...................................wtf Alec I hoped you'd do better this episode, but apparently not?? I mean, not investigating anything, just taking random person at her word, not even taking the time to talk with Izzy – even worse, showing in front of a third party that he didn't know about the Raphael* thing – and finally, basically him making that offer half-felt like he was trying to get back at Izzy for her keeping secrets from him? Wtf Alec? Wtf? And also, since the only werewolves left are Luke (currently in jail), Maia (currently missing in action) and Bat (currently at home like the neat little werewolf armcandy that he is) it's really not like Alec is under time pressure to get the vampires who killed all the werewolves behind bars. What's gonna happen if he takes a few hours to investigate properly? There is literally no risk of a war breaking out between werewolves and vampires since there are basically no werewolves left. Wtf Alec, I just robbed you of your already super flimsy excuse for your behavior, so please. Explain yourself. It's as if he wants to make up for last week's inaction by making super swift decisions. Wtf. If this is not Plot Convenience then I don't know what is.

*I guess Alec stopped holding those weekly downworld cabinet meetings or otherwise he would have noticed that Raphael is missing...... LOL or else maybe they want to tell us less than a week passed since 3x04 which, honestly, I WOULDN'T EVEN BE SURPRISED OKAY

Luke and Clary and Jace are so frikkin stupid. I mean, it's not like they were in this exact same situation in this exact same precinct in season 1 and remembered to turn of the frikkin security cams are you kidding me wtf

Self-fulfilling prophecy, Luke. Well frikkin done. I don't even feel sorry for you.

Actually they kicked you out because they new you didn't prioritize them, but sure. Survivor's guilt. I get it.

Anyway now that Luke is caught on tape talking to non-existent people about werewolves and vampires I guess he'll go to the psych ward instead of the jail, so yay for improvement?

<3

Quick question.... after the cut, to they just awkwardly stand around until someone opens the door again so Jace and Clary can slip out?

WTF Underhill don't make me hate you.

Izzy: “Raphael is not a bad person. He just made a horrible mistake.” Alec: “He commited a gross violation of the Accords.” Izzy: “He's trying to turn his life around.” Alec: “It doesn't change what he did.”

And yet.............. Alec pardoned Heidi....................... and yet..................................... Izzy hates on Jordan........................................... It's like no one on this show is able to assess situations consistently while disregarding personal relations to the people involved. Really. I don't even really expect it from Izzy because she's too passionate for that. But I sure as hell expected better from Alec. Smh.

................................................................. What. What even. Because doing things by herself worked out so well last time. Because Alec totally acts like his trust in her judgement wasn't shaken by this revelation. Wtf Alec, why do you agree to this. It makes no sense.

?????????? this is not the Aline from 2x15

and that bothers me because 1) why recast her wtf and 2) I think 2x15 Aline looked more approachable and warm and yeah wtf why recast her. So from now on I'm calling this imposter “Aline”. I'm serious. Watch me.

Plot Twist: In German they are dubbed by the same dubbing actress.

Edit: Apparently they recast here because 2x15 Aline wasn't available due to scheduling conflicts which, okay, valid. But I'm still calling the imposter “Aline”. I've commited to it already, okay??

Alec, your arguemnt is still invalid because the only werewolf ready to wage war is standing right in front of you and you said yourself you thought she was dead. Wtf man.

YEAH ALEC AND FOR THAT REASON YOU WAIT BEFORE YOU STRIKE A DEAL WITH SUSPECTS WTF MAN YOU OVERTHINK EVERYTHING BUT IN THIS YOU DON'T HAVE TIME TO WAIT THREE FRIKKIN MINUTES ARE YOU ACTUALLY KIDDING ME-- I'm exasperated, in case you can't tell. Mainly because Alec assuming Maia is dead makes no sense whatsoever. She wasn't among the dead, so why would he assume she's dead instead of escaped? Why didn't he try to track her? Why didn't he try to call her himself? Why didn't they call ahead?!* So many questions, all answered with two words: Plot Convenience.

*Oh right, because they trusted Luke to tell the Institute everything. But my point still stands. This miscommunication is ridiculous.

Also, can we talk about the pacing? In the time Simon needs to drive his and Maia's ass over to the Institute, Heidi walks in, Alec draws up an amnesty and organizes a mission, they go to the DuMort, secure all the vamps, and bring them back into the Institute. Just how slow was Simon driving? Makes no sense. Wtf.

Uh-huh. Sure, Head of Security, why would you need to know that. Also, who made those keys? Are they lying around somewhere in a spare drawer? So many questions.

Good save, man. I can accept that. Seems he's trying to do his job. But still. The way he half-whispered insolently during that mission briefing strikes me as really not fitting his character. He calls Alec “Sir” dammit. As if he'd stoop to such cheap bitchy behavior, especially when it stands to reason that the shadowhunter he was whispering to doesn't respect Alec like Underhill does because, y'know, gay and dating a downworlder and the general tendency of shadowhunters to be biased and racist.

LOL I guess the first thing I can really appreciate about this episode is that they make an effort to bring back stuff from the past season???

Aha. Looks like someone felt the need to change.

Clary: “He somehow got it in that twisted head of his that I'm gonna help him find it.”

........did I miss that part? Because I sure don't recall it.

Well, Simon, then I hope you have a degree in psychology and don't ask any leading questions that make her useless as a witness. Also, be sure to carry your plan out while Alec isn't present so your story will be more credible and Alec won't think you encanto-ed her so she says what you need her to say to get Heidi behind bars. Since, you know, you and Maia are totally neutral when it comes to this investigation. It's always a great idea to conduct investigations yourself when you're completely unbiased and absolutely not involved in any way, with no personal stakes in the matter. SIGH.

This.... was actually unexpected. See, this is why I like Heidi as a villain. She is smart and she knows how to cover her tracks. And that whole plan to stir up werewolves and vampires against each other was expertedly executed (even if her defense in front of Izzy and Alec was a little weak and Griffin could have acted a little less stupid).

Hahahahaha Magnus. Tbh though, Alec knew Underhill would be in charge of setting Magnus up with a key, and the long amount he thought about what the hell Magnus meant makes me think he doesn't really think handsome = Underhill. Surely not after that haircut amiright ok sorry sorry I'm shutting up. Underhill is a handsome guy.

Ugh. Okay, honestly I don't want to do this. I want to say this was a cute scene and move on. But I just can't move past Alec's apology. Why the hell does he apologise? He did nothing wrong? It's his typical my-opinion-doesn't-count,-whatever-the-person-I-love-says-must-be-right-and-I-am-wrong spiel and I hate it. It would have been something else entirely if he'd said “I didn't know this bothered you so much, I won't do that again in the future if it's a problem to you.” Finding a compromise while recognizing that talking about his issues is his right, since Magnus didn't ask him to keep quiet about it. No matter how good he knows Underhill – and I agree with Magnus on that one, it was strange for Alec to talk about his problems with someone he barely knows, but at the time it was, oh surprise, Plot Convienience to bait some cheating angst – it was his right and with his apology

he basically asserts that it wasn't. Because of some misguided jealousy from Magnus. Magnus should protest this immediately but he doesn’t, he just lets it sit there and just..... argh!

Also another thing, since I saw some people getting worked up over it: Yes, I read the scene earlier in the way that Alec didn't realize Magnus was talking about Underhill because he finds him so super hot, but because context reasons. Still, even if he did find Underhill attractive... that's not a problem? It's part of interacting with someone and looking at their face while talking to them and by the way realizing “Wow, this person isn't fugly.” If he spent all his days oogling Underhill that would be something else entirely, but he obviously doesn't. So, even if his conclusion was “Handsome? Must be Underhill!” that wouldn't make him a bad person. We all know he only has eyes for Magnus.

*sigh* I'm a weak woman, okay, this placates me a little.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA I  C A N ' T The fact that he thinks he needs to clarify!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Amazing.

I have so many questions. If she wakes up, will she hold her breath again? I honestly expected her to be dead after Heidi's order, but apparently encanto only takes hold of the person's actions while they are conscious. So this leads me to the question why the f Nora is in a coma instead of simply unconscious, since if your brain doesn't get oxygen you slip into unconsciousness, not coma wtf.

...............by? The shadowhunters on washing machine handling duty?? So many questions.

.........or just do it right away. Why wait?

!!!!!!!!!YES at least someone has common sense left this episode. It physically pains me that this person is Jonathan. Wtf, show.

1) Soooooo why is his magic suddenly blue again? Though it's slightly tinted so I guess one could argue that this is Magnus trying to cover up the ugly Lorenzo-color. 2) Did the nurse really let them all in? Are they using glamors? I need answers. 3) Won't this place be swarming with doctors as soon as she wakes up?

“This is Maia. If you're hearing this, it's because my phone's battery sucks.”

Hahaha, I approve.

Lol this is the other reason I like Heidi as a villain, she's cheeky.

That.......... WAS UNEXPECTED OH MY GOD WOOOW I DID NOT SEE THAT COMING!!! Color me impressed!!! And from Maia no less, who's always throw fists first, think straight later!!!

But..... while we saw where she got that syringe from I can't help but wonder where the hell she got that Holy Water from? Also how the hell did Simon, Magnus and Alec know in which back alley exactly she was hiding?? Guess we'll never know.

Soooooo whenever she stares into the flames she gets a Jonathan-possession-episode???? Okay??????? Why?????????????????? But anyway, the solution to their predicament seems clear: Just keep her away from fire. Then again they're shadowhunters, so compulsively lighting candles is a thing, so I see where this might get difficult.

You know, this scene would probabley even touch me emotionally if I wasn't busy muttering wtf under my breath because I'm still not over how they completely screwed over the Accords. With the way things were back in 3x04 what Izzy did in banishing Raphael was nothing more than an exceedance of competence. (Yes, Raphael deserves punishment for what he did, but not. from. Izzy.) And now suddenly it's a law-breaking act of compassion? Wtf, no, doesn't compute.

Also, as Bohemian pointed out: why the hell is Raphael's Dramatic Pre Jail Scene with Izzy instead of, idk, Magnus who's like a father to him and also at the Institute in this very moment?? Why do those two don't get any screen-time together when their relationship is more profound than, sorry, anything between Izzy and Raphael?? Tbh reducing Raphael to a pining mess who's only thinking about Izzy makes him feel real two-dimensional to me and he deserves wayyy better than that.

...................you know what? No!! Too late!! I've mentioned it in a past reaction post (from 3A I think) that I would have loved for this to be the reason they break up: Maia's okay-ness with ending a conflict through violence and Simon's relative patriotism. And even though this scene was everything I hoped for in this regard it still leaves a stale taste in my mouth because it's come too frakkin late. They are already broken up and their break up scene wasn't up to par. And why wasn't this their break up scene? Because if they'd been together up until now we couldn't have gotten the Jordan/Maia cuddling. Ugh.

Also this

would have certainly packed more of a punch if it came from someone who was consistently opinionated that way and wasn't randomly stricken by “I don't give a damn who gets injured, I have a gig to get to” moods (and yeah, I'm still not forgiving that, Simon).

Ohhhh no Magnus, stay away from that carpet, bad things will happen here, didn't you see the sneak peek????

WOW I am impressed, this is more than I expected so I'm really happy about this, especially since we all know how Magnus “It's all in the past” Bane normally deals with conflicts. You can see how much it costs him to get over himself and say this, and I love it. (What I don’t love is that Alec immediately glosses over this and barely even registers it but, whatever, that’s not Magnus's fault. He did what he should have done, and I’m happy about it.)

“Having an outsider live at the Institute, that is against protocol. And how can I expect everyone else to follow the rules if I don't follow them myself?”

I mean, I don't really think Maia would have refrained from her little murder plot if Magnus had spend the night at a hotel instead of in Alec's bed, but I recognize Alec at least attempting to be true to his rule-abiding, authority-acknowledging character for five seconds. So I'm somewhat semi-..... uh, quarter-proud of him.

Awwwww and Underhill just worked the whole day to get him settled in, the poor guy.

AGAIN WOW you can see how much courage it costs him to ask this after last half-season's moving-in-talk went so smoothly!!! I love it!!!

I LOVE IT!!!

I HATE IT!!! Yeah wow, I really hate it. Why can't they be happy for two seconds istg!!!!!

Btw I'm ordering you to read Matt's live tweets because they are therapeutic, okay.

(Bacon Gif Source)

#shadowhunters #3x15 #alec lightwood #magnus bane #isabelle lightwood #jace wayland #clary fray #luke garroway #maia roberts #simon lewis #raphael santiago #jonathan morgenstern #underhill #aline penhallow #should i tag plot convenience as a character too? #i mean it certainly holds as much influence as an actual character so #why not #here we go #plot convenience #reaction

[professional-anti]

Chapter Six: Forsaken

Chapter Six: Forsaken Aka Nazgûl. Anyhoo, Clary meets Alec and Jace in the weapons room. Alec is still hardcore judging her, but honestly, at least he’s not sucking her dick like Hodge. Our parabatai/parabros are polishing some seraph blades made by ppl Jace calls the Iron Sisters. I wonder if they’ll come back up, or if this is just another unnecessary detail.

Clary asks the perfectly reasonable question of if the blades are made by magic, and Jace shits on mundanes:

“The funny thing about mundies,” Jace said, to nobody in particular, “is how obsessed they are with magic for a bunch of people who don’t even know what the word means.”

Um,,,,, this means what exactly? mag·ic ˈmajik/ noun noun: magic 1 1. 
the power of apparently influencing the course of events by using mysterious or supernatural forces.

So far, everything has been supernatural. Please tell me, Jace, about your super speshul definition of magic that will totally be nothing like this definition.

“Magic is a dark and elemental force, not just a lot of sparkly wands and crystal balls and talking goldfish.”

Clary rightfully gets annoyed at him bc he’s been fucking ridiculous. Asking if some crazy angel knives were made by magic is nothing like asking about sparkly wands and crystal balls and flue powder whatever the hell else Jace wants to bitch about. Also, steles? Wands. Crystal balls will probably come up. Talking goldfish? Give it time. Jace gives a suberdumb comparison metaphor that I’m not even gonna type out. Clary tells Jace that’s he’s driveling, and I wish she’d go off like this more. Alec unexpectedly joins team Clary and tells her that they don’t do magic.

????????? What do you call your steles and runes, then??????????? They’re literally spells??????? Cassie has just come up with this random definition of magic that makes no sense and leaves a lot of other stuff undefined. If steles aren’t magic, what are they?????

Clary asks Jace to take her to her apartment and ohhhhhhh I get it. Alec is jealous bc he has a crush on Jace. Why, Alec?? You could do so much better!! And you will do better!!! Alec is my BFF rn bc I also have a crush on my straight best friend, rip me. It’s just gay culture. But Jace shouldn’t even be into Clary. They just met. Gag me with a spoon.

Jace admits that he wasn’t totally sure that Clary was a Shadowhunter before using the stele on her, but it seems like she would have died if he hadn’t done it, so idk. I’m mad, but I got bigger problems, you know what I’m saying?

CLARY SLAPS HIM. CLARY SLAPS HIM. CLARY SLAPS HIM.

(source: https://giphy.com/gifs/harry-potter-hermione-granger-draco-malfoy-okjBrdrg20LZu)

Go OFF. Okay, so Jace goes into “an angry silence”. Boo hoo. Clary feels guilty and I’m gonna slap HER bc no one needed a slap more than Jace. All he’s done so far is mock her and make her feel bad!! It isn’t Witty Banter or Flirting, it’s just rude AF. But I’m glad the narrative seems to realize that, at least a little. It still won’t stop Clary from falling in love with him, sigh.

Ohhhhhh noooo we get some of that “Clary isn’t like other girls!” bullshit:

Farther down the train, two teenage girls sitting on an orange bench seat were giggling together. The sort of girls Clary had never liked at St. Xavier’s, sporting pink jelly mules and fake tans. Clary wondered for a moment if they were laughing at her, before she realized with a start of surprise that they were looking at Jace.

Bc girls who like boys are always Sluts and Skanks who wear those ugly jelly mules and get *gasp* tans!! There’s nothing inherently wrong with giggling or wearing fashionable shoes (were these fashionable in 2007? I was but a child then) or getting fake tans. But Cassie is doing this to show us that these are the stereotypical girls, and stereotypical girls are annoying and boy-crazy and not to be trusted. Clary is short, remember? She’s Not Like Other Girls.

Also, what is the deal with Jace? I’m legit confused. I’ve never seen a man so attractive that I had to stop and giggle out loud with my friends. We might whisper or text about it, but boys, contrary to popular belief, don’t send girls into tailspins. And if a boy does? There’s nothing wrong with the girl. She’s not dumb for giggling!!!

Ohhh boy.

She remembered the girl in the coffee shop who had been staring at Simon. Girls always got that look on their faces when they thought someone was cute.

Always. We always get that look on our faces when we see someone attractive. Does CC realize that girls are not a homogenous group? And remember, Clary’s not putting herself in the group of girls. She’s too special for that look. That’s for the airhead girls. (This is why it’s totally possible for CC to write Anti-Semitic crap, btw. Bc as we see here, she also writes sexist crap.)

Clary angsts for a little bit about how Jace’s looks are so different from Alec’s “cameo looks” (???) and then daydreams about Jace’s eyes. They have some dumb banter about the girls. Jace explains about Alec being his parabatai which is just a fancy term for fighting partners. I WANT CLARY AND ISABELLE TO BE PARABATAI but these books are sexist so I doubt it but OMG YOU KNOW WHAT THIS IS MY SHIP NOW. BC IT’S THE EXACT OPPOSITE OF WHAT CC WANTS AND I DON’T CARE!!!!

*Happy sigh* (this video warmed my cold bisexual heart)

Okay. Back to business. Jace says that the Lightwoods are his adopted family, and they get to her apartment. Jace pulls out the Sensor and explains that it senses demons/demon energy. Who designs these? Why is it the only thing we’ve seen so far that merges magic and tech? Is Elba all a merge of magic and tech? If Shadowhunters can merge magic and tech, why do they use such archaic weapons? Who designs the magical technology? I have so many questions and I’m sure approximately none of them will be answered.

They go into the apartment and all the furniture has been removed. Everything’s weirdly cold, and when she tries to go into her room, the door punches her or something. It’s a little unclear. There’s a giant in the apartment!! Jace tries to fight the giant and rushes Clary out of the apartment. They very cleverly shut the front door, and the giant bangs right through it. Jace falls down the stairs fighting it and breaks his arm, so I guess it’s time for some poorly written hurt/comfort. Also, the seraph blades are disposable??? And you have to name them before using them, and I’m not sure where these names are coming from. Like, you name it, and then a blade bursts out of a hollow tube. I’m honestly imaging these:

Ugh, AP Bio labs were the WORST. Jace tells Clary not to watch bc she’s a child I guess and kills the giant. Then he draws a rune on his skin that heals him, so I stand corrected on the hurt/comfort front. Clary has a random memory of her mother being covered in faded scars that look like Jace’s faded rune, and, even knowing what she does now about glamor and magic shit, goes “oh, but that’s not really what her back looked like.”

I think Clary might actually be really dumb?

Clary’s also fucking shocked that Jace’s arm is healed and it’s just. She knows about runes. She knows about demons and giants and people who are half angel, and this still gets her?

It turns out that the guy isn’t actually a giant, just a former person who was drawn on with a stele. Now he’s one of the Nine Riders, in thrall to a ring…ahem. Forsaken are controlled by the ppl who drew on them with their magic sharpies. Jace starts to go upstairs to check for more, and Madame Dorothea pops out like: “There are more where that came from!” Umm. It’s a pretty small apartment, no? I feel like they already checked everywhere.

Jace gets really confused bc even though he explained to Clary that witches are mundanes who can do some magic not a single chapter ago, he still doesn’t understand how Madame Dorothea knows anything. Dory gets dramatic about the Clave, which I appreciate. They suck. Then Dory tells Clary to forget about her mom, and Clary understandably freaks out. Dory’s all, I’m not getting involved, hun. But then Jace threatens her with the Silent Brothers, and she invites them in. She also drops Jace’s real name, Wayland, and Jace is like, Yo wtf.

Anyway, they go in. The end.

#anti cassandra clare #anti the mortal instruments #book snark #CoB: Chapter 6 #CoB snark