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griffin-girl-r · 3 months

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Monster (Part 1)

Created: 07.11.2023

Finished: 03.01.2023

Edited: 09.02.2024

Age: 10

Word count: 4,667

Warnings: Cussing, Guns, Blood, Death, Kidnapping, Violence, Lies

Anymore let me know

Request: Yes (Wattpad user + Tumblr user)

Sequel to: The legacy

AU: Mafia

—

The sunlight filtered through the lavish villa with its floor-to-ceiling windows and plush purple curtains, that were a constant reminder of Natasha's mysterious personality.

Natasha had started her day normally, with her morning workout and signing a few pepers that would set in motion a string of actions meant to grow her empire.

Nothing was predicting what was about to happen that very same day.

—

The invincible head of one of the most powerful mobs to have ever existed slowly, deliberately made her way up the stairs as sunlight filtered through the curtains and a gentle breeze rustled them.

Natasha's destination?

Her 10-year-old daughter's room.

She was about to wake her precious Y/N from her peaceful slumber so they could have breakfast together.

Y/N, who Natasha had protected from the darkness of her mother's world, knew that her mama was the leader of a group as everyone always looked at Natasha for orders, but she had no idea what exactly was Natasha doing for a living.

You thought she just ran many businesses, as Natasha took care to preserve your inocence and leave aside that running those businesses meant hurting people.

As she reached your bed, Natasha took a moment to admire your inocent and beautiful face, a smile only reserved for you appearing on her face.

She had honestly no idea what she had done to deserve such a beautiful and pure soul she could call her own.

Sometimes she wonders from where you inhired so much kindness.

Maybe from your father?

'Could be.' The older readhead thought

Natasha, dressed elegantly in a tailored black suit that she loved, bended down to shake her sleeping daughter awake, whispering softly, "Y/N, it's time to wake up, my darling."

Natasha didn't want to rush you.

She wanted to allow you to wake up to the world in your own time so you could be in a good mood to greet the day.

You started rubbing your eyes, letting out a yawn in the process, "Morning, Mama." You sweetly greeted your mother, only making her smile grow wider "What time is it?"

"It's ten o'clock, sweetheart. Time for us to start the day." Natasha replied, brushing a strand of your hair behind your ear as you stretched your arms

You glanced at the clock on your nightstand and, to your surprise, you notoced that Natasha had let you slept in late this morning.

"Wow, I slept in!" You looked from the clock to Natasha, shocked

"It's Sunday today, my princess." Natasha smiled, gently tracing your nose with her finger

"What's for breakfast?" You questioned as your stomach let out a loud growl

Natasha chuckled as she gathered you in her arms, tightly hugging you as she burried her nose in your hair.

Natasha didn't answer before taking your hand in hers and leading you to the dining area.

There, a table was spread with an impressive display of freshly baked croissants, blueberry pancakes, and tropical fruits.

"You're in luck, my love. Today, we have your favorite breakfast." Natasha said when she heard you gasp, smiling warmly as she helped you seat at the table

You both sat down to enjoy the delicious feast, engaging in lighthearted conversation, Natasha making sure to give you her full and undevided attention.

But there was one question that has been on your mind, that, in between bites, you found the courage to finally voice out.

"Mama, I've been wondering..." You hesitated, avoiding Natasha's gaze, unsure of her reaction "What exactly do you do for work?"

Natasha's smiling expression faltered slightly, but she quickly regained composure, not wanting to betray her façade.

"As you know, sweetheart," Natasha began, trying to keep a smile on her face for you "I manage a lot of things. But mainly, I help people. I ensure that they stay safe and secure."

That piqued your curiosity, making you want to know even more detailes about your mother's secret profession.

"But do they know about what you do?" You eagerly questioned, the breakfast long forgotten "How do you keep them safe?"

Natasha's eyes meet yours, a mixture of love and concealed secrets shimmering within them, struggling to find the right words to explain.

"Some people may not fully understand the lengths I go to protect them, Y/N." Natasha carefully chose her words "That's why I keep my work separate from our personal lives."

For a moment, Y/N pondered her mother's words. Then, her young innocence surfaced.

"Mama, can I come to work with you sometime?" You asked hopefully "I promise I'll be good."

Natasha's expression softened, and she chuckled lightly, suppressing a faint sadness.

"Maybe, when you're a little older, my darling." She softly said "For now, your place is here, being a child."

You nodded, a tinge of disappointment flickering across your face as you took a last sip of your orange juice, your eyes lingering on Natasha's figure as she got up, preparing to leave for work.

"Okay, Mama. I'll be waiting for you here when you get back." You said sadly "Then we can build the new Harry Potter Lego set uncle Bucky got me yesterday because I won't start it without you."

Natasha leaned down, planting a tender kiss on her baby's forehead. Her voice is filled with a mother's love.

"I'll be back before you know it." She smiled "I love you, Y/N/N."

As Y/N watched her mother walk towards the grand entrance, her heart felt heavy with a mixture of pride and longing.

"I love you too, Mom. Stay safe." You whispered to yourself when Natasha was out of hearing's reach

As the heavy door closed behind Natasha, Y/N was left alone in their opulent villa, a silent witness to a secret world she still yearned to explore.

She knew that someday, she would uncover the truth and join her mother in the world she had only glimpsed from a distance.

But for now, she must wait patiently, feeling a mixture of excitement and trepidation for the day she too would step into the shadows and play her part in keeping the world safe.

But who said that day couldn't be today?

—

Natasha stood in the dimly lit room of an abandoned building, fear and tension hanging heavily in the air caused by her sharp and deadly presence as she stood over a HYDRA member.

The man, who was a member of Natasha's biggest rival mob, looked to be in his midforties, as he stood desperate and defiant, trembling while tied by Natasha's men to a chair.

Although bloodied and bruised by Natasha's torture, he kept refusing to reveal the informations she was was seeking.

Through gritted teeth, the HYDRA member, fueled by his determination, challenged Natasha's ability to extract their secrets.

"You think I'll give up our secrets that easily?" He chuckled mockingly "You're gravely mistaken, Natasha!" The man declared

Natasha smirked, a hint of amusement mingling with the darkness in her intentions.

She took a step closer, circling him like a predator stalking its prey. Her piercing gaze bores into him, determination etched on her face.

"Oh, sweetie, I never expected it to be easy," She replied confidently "But trust me, people like you always break. It's just a matter of time."

The woman's attention drifted to the HYDRA member's clenched fists, trembling with both pain and defiance. Impatience flickering within her as she narrowed her eyes.

"You see, I've got a timeline to keep. And I won't waste it dancing around your games." Natasha says, her back turned to him

"Why?" The man laughed "You have a child waiting for you at home?"

Natasha tried to stay calm.

She couldn't allow the member to manipulate her judgment by using her sweet daughter against her.

Casually, the red-headed woman pulled out a sleek, silver pistol from her belt.

The cold metal gleaming in the dimness of the building's lights.

"One last chance, my friend," Natasha warned, her voice laced with an eerie calmness but her friendly demeanor was gone "Tell me what I need to know, or I'll have to find another way to encourage your cooperation."

Smirking defiantly, the HYDRA member responded "You think a bullet from that gun is going to make me betray my comrades? You're delusional, Natalia."

Natasha's calmness faded, replaced by a cold determination that instilled fear even in the bravest souls.

Without a moment's hesitation, she swiftly turned around, raising her pistol, and aiming it at the HYDRA member's forehead.

"I was hoping you'd choose the easy way out..." The boss murmurs, slightly disappointed

A single gunshot reverberates through the room, the sound of finality.

The HYDRA member's lifeless body slumped forward, blood pooling onto the cold concrete floor.

"Was it really necessary to kill him, Natasha?" Clint, Natasha's best friend who was present in the room, questioned

"I agree with birdhead." Maria said

"I wouldn't question Natasha's decisions if I were you." Steve turned to his two friends

"I agree." Bucky, the last person present in the room, nodded while checking the sharpness of his knife's blade

Natasha remained silent, her eyes glued to the blood that was expanding at her feet.

And just as the silence threatened to envelop the room again, a soft whimper broke through.

Natasha's eyes widened with surprise "We're not alone." She warned

The lifeless body of the HYDRA member lay forgotten, a casualty of Natasha's relentless pursuit of power, as the group quickly took a fighting stance, weapons being pulled out, ready to protect their leader and friend.

Natasha turned towards the spot from where the sound was heard and saw a slightly ajar locker.

She slowly started walking towards it, ready to face whatever was hiding inside.

—

Natasha tightened her grip on the gun in her hand, her hands steady and ready to shoot at any moment if needed.

Her steps echoed throughout the empty room as her heels made contact with the cold floor.

Trailing behind her were Bucky, Steve, Clint, and Maria, all prepared to fight at a moment's notice.

The boss' steps where mesured, each one meticulously calculated, as the air around them grew heavy with anxiety.

Slowly, Natasha reached out towards the locker door, and with one swift move, she slammed it open, pointing her gun at whatever lay behind it.

Silence enveloped the room once more before a loud gasp escaped the read headed woman's lips.

"Y/N?!" Natasha shouted, her voice unintentionally coming out too high-pitched

You flinched at the sound as your trembling body began to shake even more violently.

Natasha was shocked. Of all things, she never expected to find her precious daughter hidden in that damned locker.

"Baby?" Natasha breathed out, quickly putting away the gun she had aimed at your head "How did you get here?"

Natasha tried to place her hand on your shoulder.

"Get away from me!" You cried out, quickly moving away from Natasha

You crawled out of the locker in a second as you took a few steps backwards, trying to get as far away as possible from your mother and the rest of your family.

"Sweetheart?" Natasha called out "How did you get here?"

Natasha was confused, to say the least.

She couldn't understand how the fuck were you able to get all the way here.

How did no one see that you had followed them?

"Don't touch me!" You yelled when Natasha tried to touch you again

Tears were already streaming down your face and, as you looked at your mother with your teary eyes, you couldn't recognize the woman who stood before you anymore.

"You're a monster!" You cried out in pain "Monster!"

Taking a big step forward, you tried to push Natasha backwards with all your might, but compared to the strenght of your mother, your effort was almost non existent.

Natasha took half a step back to give you the impression that you had managed to push her, but otherwise, she didn't budge.

"Baby, Y/N, how are you here?" The older redhead asked again, confusion evident in her voice as she tried to maintain her calm "What have you seen?"

"You killed him!" You pointed to the corpse of the enemy, now laying in a pool of blood

You were now old enough to know what a criminal is, and you are now more than certain that your mama was one as well.

"How could you do this?!" You shouted

"Honey, this is not what it seems." The boss tried to save what was left of your innocence "We were just playing." She explained "You know that Mama's job is to protect people."

"Y/N/N!" Your godmother, Maria, called "Let's go home, kid. Your Mama will explain everything when we've all calmed down a little."

"I don't want to go home!" You shouted in Maria's direction, though your tear-blurred vision made it difficult to see her clearly

Bucky, thinking it would be a good moment to step in, kneeled beside you.

"Princess, I think you should let us explain ourselves first." He began "And we can have ice cream while we all talk."

"No, James!" You shouted, moving away from Bucky's touch as he placed his hand on your shoulder

Everyone froze.

You had never called Bucky by his real name.

He was mostly 'Uncle Bucky' , 'Bucks' , or just 'Bucky'.

Only Natasha called the man by his birth name.

"Oh, come on, doll," Bucky said, overcoming his shock and masking it with a cheerful tone. "Don't be so serious. Only your mother can scare me like you did. When she's angry, she shouts my name like that."

You looked again to the dead body, only to find it already gone and your Uncle Steve nowhere in sight.

You knew he was the only one fast enough to get rid of it.

"Listen to us, Y/N." Clint also spoke for the first time "You know you're my favorite niece."

"I'm your only niece." You sniffed, seemingly more calm, and everyone tought that maybe they had the situation under control

But their hopes were soon dashed as you bolted past everyone and ran towards the first door you saw.

"Y/N!" Natasha's eyes went wide, and she quickly darted after you

Bucky and Steve, who had just returned to the room, followed closely behind the two redheaded Romanoff girls.

They should have known that you were tricking them.

After all, you are your mother's daughter.

Just as Natasha was about to catch up with you, you proved yourself sneakier than they had anticipated, taking a right turn and disappearing from their sight.

The adults followed, finding themselves on a back street behind the building they had been in.

"Where is she?" Steve asked, confused, looking around for any sign of you

"Y/N!" Natasha breathlessly shouted "Baby, where are you?!"

"Y/N!" Steve shouted

"Y/N!" Bucky yelled, starting to look around for any trace of you "Doll, stop playing and come out from wherever you're hiding. This isn't funny!"

"Sweetie!" Natasha called out, sniffing, as realization of what happened settled in "Mama's sorry, honey. Please come here."

"Natasha..." Bucky turned around to look at his boss before he was interrupted

"Nat!" Steve shouted, chatching Natasha and Bucky's attention as they snapped their heads in the direction of his voice

Steve bent down and picked up something from the ground.

"I think I know where Y/N is." The blond man said, looking in disbelief at his friends

Natasha felt as if her heart was about to jump out of her chest as Bucky raised his metal arm and placed it on her back, bracing himself for whatever was about to come.

Steve held up the object in his hand and showed it to them.

Natasha's breath caught in her throat as she took in the sight before her.

HYDRA's symbol proudly shone in the sunlight, confirming her worst fear.

The boss was smart enough to understand what the presence of that badge with the symbol of her greatest enemy meant.

HYDRA had kidnaped her precious baby girl.

She didn't know how it could be possible, given the fact that they were only two seconds behind you but no matter how this happened, the mother was determinated to get her baby back.

"What are we going to do now?" Bucky breathed out

—

Natasha was tirelessly pacing back and forth on the long red carpet in her office; her angered voice was the only sound that broke the otherwise silent room.

"How could this happen?!" Natasha shouted as she stopped in front of Bucky Barnes and Maria Hill. "How could a little girl get past my supposed impenetrable security?! How did none of you notice Y/N sneak inside the car?!"

Maria and Bucky exchanged a quick, side-eyed look before both of their heads hung low.

It was as if the wooden floor of Natasha's office had become interesting all of a sudden.

"Talk!" Natasha shouted when the people in front of her hesitated to answer.

"We..." Maria, the person who was in charge of Natasha's security and the training of her men, began. "We have no idea how the men failed to notice-"

"I haven't asked about the men!" Natasha cut Maria's sentence off. "I asked how you haven't noticed Y/N getting inside the car. You and Bucky, Maria," Natasha clarified.

"It was a terrible error, Nat." Bucky was the one to speak now. "I guarantee you that, from now on, we will be more vigilant and we'll double the security guards to prevent this from happening again. We can-"

Bucky's sentence, as well as Maria's, was cut short when Natasha forcefully grabbed Bucky by his shirt and pulled him closer to her, despite the obvious height difference between them.

"You had one job, James." Natasha breathed out through gritted teeth, her eyes burning with a mix of anger and disappointment. "You had to make sure that, no matter what happens, Y/N will not leave this house without my knowledge and consent, and only after that, follow me."

Bucky's shoulders fell as he once again lowered his head, guilt seeping inside his heart.

"I'm sorry..." The man with a metal arm whispered guiltily.

"I want to hear none of this." Natasha shook her head, her tone seemingly calmer. "Yes, Maria had to transform this house into a fortress impossible to penetrate, but you, James, you had the greatest responsibility of them all." The redhead tried to look into the man's eyes. "You had to be the personal bodyguard of our daughter, James, ensure her safety above anything else, and you failed. You promised to keep her safe, and look where we are now. HYDRA has our precious little girl, and we have no information about her state or about, who knows what, they might have done to her. You failed Y/N." Tears glistened in the mother's eyes. "You failed me."

Bucky dryly swallowed the lump in his throat; the burden on his shoulders never felt heavier than now.

He failed.

And he knows it.

He knows that if something were to happen to the impossible product of the passionate love he and Natasha once shared, the consequences will be catastrophic. Natasha's wrath knows no bounds when it comes to her one and only offspring.

If something were to happen to their beloved daughter, Bucky would be the only one to blame.

"I swear that I'm going to bring our little girl back here safe and sound." Bucky met Natasha's tearful gaze, determination shining in his eyes. "It's my duty as a father, Natalia."

Natasha took a deep breath; her facade momentarily dropped in front of the man she once laid bare her soul and body.

In front of the man who knew all her scars, seen and unseen.

"You better, or I won't be Natalia for you anymore. You'll have to meet Natasha if you don't fulfill your duty as her Papa." Natasha quietly sniffed before taking a step backwards, her back straightening as she regained her composure. "You have 24 hours to bring my daughter back home, or else I am going to tie you both to my car, drag you through the entire New York before slowly boiling you to your death and cut you up in pieces and feed you to Reaper, who would be more than delighted to eat you."

Natasha pointed to Reaper, your dog, a towering Doberman who could devour a person in seconds if commanded, but otherwise a gentle and loving companion.

Reaper slowly walked to Natasha and nudged her hand with his nose, looking up at her as if he knew that something was terribly wrong.

Despite having a scary appearance, Reaper was a loyal companion and fiercely protective of you and Natasha.

But more specifically, of you.

Natasha had bought Reaper three years ago for you, hoping that you would find a friend in that puppy and learn to be responsible at the same time.

But you and Reaper had become so much more than just friends.

It was as if you and he were connected by an invisible bond that transcended any logical explanation.

"What is it, boy?" Natasha asked, concerned, her voice soft, as she crouched down next to the dog, petting his head. "What happened?"

Reaper looked at Natasha, and in that moment, the three people in the room could see tears forming in the animal's eyes.

It was as if a lightbulb lit up above Natasha's head when she saw it, her heart dropping to her stomach.

"Is Y/N, isn't she, Reaper?" Natasha hesitated to ask as if the dog could answer her with words. "What happened to Y/N, boy? What happened to her?"

All adults watched intently every move the Doberman made, holding their breath in anticipation.

Reaper let out a whimper before his muscular body collapsed to the floor with a long sigh at Natasha's feet, his fall cushioned by the soft carpet beneath their feet.

Natasha's eyes widened with dread; Bucky's brows furrowed in confusion, and Maria's steady hands unexpectedly started trembling.

They knew it was physically impossible, but they couldn't deny that this sign scared them.

Natasha slowly stood back up from her crouched position and took a deep breath before she directed her attention back to her two trusted friends.

"Go!" Natasha ordered angrily. "Leave and find Y/N as soon as possible. I swear that you will not live to see tomorrow's sunrise if my baby isn't back in my arms by then."

Bucky and Maria nodded and hurriedly rushed out of the room, both desperate to achieve one goal.

Bring Y/N safely back home.

—

"I don't give a fuck that your men are out undercover on the streets of Asgard, Thorvald," Natasha shouted into the phone's speaker. "You're going to gather them all from that city's streets and send them to find any trace of my daughter. End of discussion!"

Natasha ended the call before she threw her phone on her desk with a long sigh.

"Remind me again why I have made an ally out of Thorvald Odinson?" Natasha placed her head into her hands.

Clint, Natasha's best friend and most trusted person, looked up at her and shrugged.

"Maybe because Thor saved your life during an attack where he could have easily let you die?" The man raised his eyebrow. "Or maybe because he genuinely cares about you, and I bet that right in this moment, he already has all his men retreated from the streets and sent out to scout the area around HYDRA's territory?"

"That's because he has the personality of a Golden Retriever." Natasha pointed out with a scoff. "His hair included."

"That's true." Clint nodded. "But you must admit he has been a loyal friend and a great hide and seek partner for Y/N."

A faint smile made its way onto Natasha's lips before it was quickly replaced by a frown.

"I am so worried, Clint." Natasha's voice shook as she looked up with tearful eyes at her friend. "I'm scared that something bad happened to Y/N. It's all my fault that she had to see me as what I truly am." She took a deep breath before continuing. "A monster."

Clint took a few steps forward and placed a comforting hand on Natasha's shoulder, giving it a slight squeeze.

"It's not your fault, Nat." Clint said in a sympathetic voice. "You only tried to protect her. You tried to hide her from the horrors of the world you had been forced to live in because you didn't want her to have the same childhood as you did."

"And at what cost?!" Natasha threw her hands into the air. "Look where it had brought me."

"We're going to find her, Tasha." The man reassured his friend.

All of a sudden, the door of Natasha's office burst open, and Bucky, Steve, and Maria ran inside, pure terror written on their faces as Bucky clung to something in his right hand.

Natasha shot to her feet as her eyes searched the faces before her for reassurance, but the only thing she found was her own panic mirrored on her friends' faces.

Clint followed suit and straightened his back as he understood that something was terribly wrong.

"Nat..." Bucky breathed out, his eyes swimming in unshed tears.

Natasha took a few tentative steps towards Bucky, a deafening silence enveloping the room as the powerful boss stopped in front of the man who once was hers.

No words were spoken, but Natasha understood.

Bucky lifted his arm and showed the redheaded woman the object he was tightly holding.

Natasha's breath caught in her throat, and the world around her started spinning.

The people around her instinctively took a step forward, but Bucky was quicker in reacting as he managed to catch the woman just in time.

"Natalia!" Bucky shouted as he supported Natasha's weight with one arm while shaking her head with the other.

"Natasha, are you okay?" Steve asked, concerned.

But Natasha didn't respond. She remained limp in Bucky's arms, her face pale, and her eyes wide with shock. The room fell into a heavy silence as everyone watched helplessly.

Finally, Natasha took a shuddering breath, and her eyes refocused. She looked up at Bucky, her voice barely a whisper. "Is... is that... Y/N's shirt?"

Bucky nodded, his own voice filled with pain. "I'm so sorry, Talia. They sent it to us... drenched in her blood."

Tears welled up in Natasha's eyes as she clutched onto Bucky tightly, the weight of the situation finally hitting her.

They had confirmed her worst fear: Y/N had been taken by HYDRA, and there was no doubting the severity of the situation.

Natasha pulled away from Bucky and steadied herself, her eyes darting around the room. "We need to find her. We need to bring her home."

Steve stepped forward, determination etched on his face. "We'll do everything we can, Nat. We'll find her."

Natasha nodded, her resolve hardening. "I don't care what it takes. I don't care who gets in our way. We are going to bring our daughter back."

Clint stepped forward, his voice steady. "We have contacts, Nat. We have resources. We'll use everything at our disposal to track down HYDRA and get her back."

Maria, who had been silently observing, finally spoke up. "I'll coordinate with our intelligence network. We'll gather all the information we can and find any possible leads."

Natasha looked at each person in the room, gratitude and determination in her eyes. "Thank you, all of you. We're a family, and we're going to fight for our little heir."

But as she tightly clung to the small, bloodied shirt of her baby girl, Natasha couldn't escape the panic and worry that had engulfed her brain and heart, one question lingering.

Was Y/N still alive?

—

Permanent taglist: @observeowl , @circe143 , @mmmmokdok , @justarandomreaderxoxo , @theunchosenonee , @lovelyy-moonlight , @natsxwife , @lizlil , @darkstar225 , @dannipotatoo , @ravensinthedaylight , @halstead-severide-fan , @daggersquadphantom , @froufrousnowman , @youralphawolf72 , @cherlenovix

#natasha romanoff #natasha romanoff x daughter!reader #natasha x daughter!reader #mama nat #natasha's child #natasha's kid #natasha romanoff x teen!reader #natasha x teen reader #natasha x baby!reader

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geemyfirstluvstory · 4 months

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"Oh! oh! oh! oh!, 오빠를 사랑해"

blue lock boys as boyfriends + playlist (can y'all tell i listen to too much kpop), fem reader, i'm feeling sad and depressed rn let me be a little angsty but i can't stand sad endings

michael kaiser: melancholy at it's finest but not in a sad way, but definitely in a more nostalgic way. he's a red flag at best and a long gone man at worst. but as a boyfriend he does his best to make you feel good about yourself, mostly via spoiling you rotten. diamonds, clothes, the best food, anything. maybe he doesn't actually like you maybe he just likes the idea of you. but he will eventually come to love you and when he does it's like a dream, he has a resting bitch face and cocky attitude but when he does open up to you it's completely serious.

playlist- chill kill (red velvet), no blueberries (dpr ian ft dpr live + cl), baby (dj roots ft camo + 정진형), love story (indilla), flower (jisoo), siren (taeyeon), anoko complex (=LOVE), monochrome kiss (SID), diary of jane (breaking benjamin)

oliver aiku: yeah girl you're not dating him...he's definitely an ex as i write this. this man is, despite how nice he is, a player at heart and girl you can't change that. but he does keep you in mind. perhaps you're his favourite special lady. he kind of pops in and out of your life, big dick though so it's okay. he knows how to treat a lady though so it's not bad but you have to be careful or you'll catch too many feelings. maybe some time passes and you're eventually end game.

playlist- rsvp (koala ft. jessi), GAL (ohayo), mommae (jay park ft ugly duck), party (chris brown ft tyga), boom (dpr live ft dpr ian), thnks fr th mmrs (fall out boy), gamez (bei maejor ft keri hilson)

don lorenzo: girl why? girl, bye. the least you could do is make sure he had real teeth...but oh well we all slip up sometimes. he's addicted to you completely, day and night he thinks about you. y'all know homeboy loves money you likely met him at a club or party. somewhere in that territory and don has no problem with spending loads of cash on you. probably wooed you over with a condo in florence since y'know his little honey in his hometown. but his biggest flaw is definitely his obsession over money

playlist- ayo (chris brown), royals (lorde), ps5 (salem ilese ft txt), i got a boy (girl's generation), swalla (jason derulo), hula hoops (dpr live ft beenzino + hwasa), empire (wengie ft minnie), red lipstick (lee hi ft yoon mirae), best friend (saweetie ft doja cat), nobody's better (Z ft fetty wap)

#blue lock x reader #blue lock #blue lock headcanons #michael kaiser x reader #oliver aiku x reader #don lorenzo x reader #michael kaiser #oliver aiku #don lorenzo

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pruning-the-minds-garden · 1 year

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Unsafe Hypnokink Creators and Hypnotists List

And other unsafe persons

This list is to lead to the posts that I come across that detail credible (and I am using my own definition of credible; I'm not a lawyer nor a court of law) accusations of wrongdoing by hypnokink creators, and therefore people to Avoid. The article names here are going to be the names of the people who are detailed in the linked article, and where parenthetical attribution is given that is to indicate that the post is not written by me. I'm doing a Read More in order to make sure that as I edit the content below the cut (the list of creators), it updates the text that appears on Reblogs.

Potentially Unsafe Hypnokink Creators:

Nimja (via FetLife and his website): Dealing with underage partners, mistreating partners, dubious content in files. A list of red flags in Nath's dealings with him, which I also find to be credible. Evidence. Evidence. (by @writtenbynath)

Blueberry Empire (via Discord and YouTube): Transphobic and homophobic attitudes by creator as well as a history of allowing underage persons on her NSFW server. The Tumblr post is written by me, but that comes from a Twitter post written by someone else.

Inventive Mind (via Discord and FetLife): Highly abusive and non-consensual brainwashing and cult leader-like behavior, all laid out here. (note: link removed because someone was using the linked page - and my link to it - for nefarious purposes. Suffice to say it supports my prior point.)

NeuralNets (On FetLife, Reddit, and as AKAs DeepDreamStates, NeuroPlex here on Tumblr. Probably more places also): Since he basically asked me to, here's a basic primer on NeuralPlex's history of misdeeds and abuse. The essentials of it is that he doesn't directly create himself, but he sets up the structures for and allows to flourish, a culture of abuse and dangerous parasocial relationships - that is, a cult of personality with them at the center - on his Discord server and takes an attitude toward safety in his files that is at best perfunctory ("this is what I have to do in order to get to the good stuff") and at worst performative ("be careful with this file because it's really powerful!" is NOT a legitimate content warning, except to them it sometimes is). While I'm sure there are a lot of people who like that sort of content, you should know that if things go bad - and that's a nonzero possibility - then he is not going to be there to help you after and is going to sweep you under a rug after. It has happened before.

Dr. Headcrash: This one is most directly supported by a sort of secondary accusation, but that speaks back to a larger pattern. So, Headcrash is known to have abused past partners and there have been issues with conventions out on the West Coast for that reason, and so I feel the need to add him here as an unsafe creator/hypnotist. He doesn't have a Tumblr so far as I'm aware, so this links to his Twitter, but I'm sure he also has a FetLife as well.

Professor Mesmer: This person used a combination of recreational drugs and hypnosis, most especially b*mbi content, to condition and abuse a number of people across several (at least three) years. Because of a combination of safety and ethical concerns with the specific pieces of evidence to which I was linked I will not link them, however I find based on those links that the accusations are credible. All I'll do by way of substantiation is say to contact Bubbles for more, if you have questions. But, be polite. Update: This is one of the rare events in the hypnokink community to break out of the hypnokink community and get noticed by the wider world. Here is a Buzzfeed News article about Professor Mesmer. Yes, he is "James."

Vassalreturns: This person has an admitted - by them - history of serial (in the dozens of past partners/victims) abuse and consent violation. I do not know the precise details, but they describe violating limits, gaslighting, emotional manipulation, and other classic abuse tactic in broad terms without specific details. I take them at their word. They are a creator of b*mbi-themed bimbo hypnokink content, and with their admitted history of abuse (which was shared with me on the condition I not broadcast it publicly, but I have vetted it and found it to be authentic) the fact they focus on "extreme" BS content is especially concerning. Also concerning is their language around their history, which shows less a genuine desire to change and more a belief that they are not capable of it coupled with a desire to fail to change and thus indulge in what is to them a forbidden fruit. Here is my post on the topic.

Other potentially unsafe people:

Ernesto / -stealth-; a photographer who advertises a willingness to take pictures of especially young, attractive women in his area for free. He buys dinner and transportation and then holds the pictures hostage in exchange for a glowing review, and uses the shoot as a chance to take advantage of his prospective model while emotionally abusing and threatening her. This is a pattern of behavior. It's also not new, but I was just made aware of it and it's ongoing.

savagemadeink: For harassing and aggressive behavior toward a content creator.

The Whack-a-Mole Rogues' Gallery:

This is the place where I will link to the rogues' gallery of predatory hypnotists who I come across on Tumblr, as I come across them. These are people who almost always delete their blog within a week or two of being called out, but reappear a month or two later under a different pseudonym (hence the name, based on me playing a never-ending game of whack-a-mole with them). I'm going to link their blog even though the link will almost certainly go dark, and link to the evidence. Since all of the accusations are basically copypasta of one another - disregarding consent, bad safety practices, treating subs poorly, etc - I'm not going to detail them. Read the evidence links for more.

Hypnotica2: Evidence

I will add to this as needed and as more come across my dash. This list is also still under construction.

#hypnokink #safety #consent

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vadersassistant · 1 year

Text

Endgame Chapter 1 (Darth Vader x Reader)

I am princess of Ethereaan, successor to my parents, the king and queen, even though I was the youngest sibling. My older sister was born with several disabilities, enabling her to not be able to fulfill the role. That left only me to take her place, at the ready to lead a planet all on my own, since I hadn’t courted anyone yet.

“I can’t believe it’s already today,” I said.

“It’ll be great just do what you always do,” Skai encouraged, helping me slip on my dress as I looked at my reflection in the mirror. I met her dark eyes, a smile appearing on both of our faces.

“Are you going with anyone?”

“Not as of right now no,” she sighed. “However, if a trooper were to ask me to dance, I’d say yes.”

“Sounds good to me,” I shrugged.

“Are you going with anyone, your highness?” her emphasis was purposed, alluding to my suitors.

“My father refused,” I said. “He wanted me to remain open minded, so the option of courting an imperial still remains.”

I shot Skai a nervous smile, as she gave me a knowing glance. It was clear the two of us agreed on how absurd it was, but still we were at a disagreement. I liked to take the high road, swallowing down the issue and making the most of it, while she preferred acknowledging it, and swindling her way out of it.

“It’s okay, if he believes that’s best then I will do as he says,” I reasoned.

“It would look good for Ethereaan, inner rim and all,” she added. “Especially with the event, you could really make a show out of this.”

“Still a little shocked,” I laughed once we finished up, going towards the door of my bedroom. “Empire Day is such a big deal.”

Empire Day was the anniversary of when the imperials resumed power and the chancellor transitioned to emperor. Every year an inner rim planet was chosen to have a ball for it, hosting hundreds of senators and high-ranking imperials in celebration. Speeches were given, parades planned beforehand, and fireworks at the end. My father and Palpatine were very close, due to Ethereaan’s trading in minerals and weaponry. It made sense that we were chosen for its third year.

Skai was quick to open the door, resuming her handmaiden personality in the process, as I fulfilled my own as princess. We headed over to the dining room to meet with the rest of my family, walking fast but not in a hurry. My posture was like a beam going down my back, as the ends of my dress fluttered naturally. It complemented the Ethereaanian colors well, those being blue and white with silver. The corridor was open, stain glass windows defining the walls while stone floors laid beneath our feet. The large room dawned quickly, my mother and father waiting at the end of the table, perking up when the doors opened.

“Good morning,” I smiled, greeting both.

“Good morning, sleep well?” mom asked.

“Mm, better than usual,” I answered while stretching. I paused, going over to see my sister before sitting down. “Good morning, Karai.”

‘Good morning sister,’ she said through sign language. Karai could hear but couldn’t form sentences, so we used sign language instead. She also couldn’t walk well, which is why we used a wheelchair when she needed to move.

I smiled, and softly squeezed her hand before finding a spot. Before me were blueberry pancakes, with Jawa juice and fruit, made by the palace chefs. I watched as the steam rolled off it, as one of the servants put it down. I mouthed a ‘thank you’ to him as my father stood up, almost at the same time I sat down. He was tall, the tallest person I had ever seen, standing at six four. When he stood up, it often meant his words were to be taken as high demand.

“There have been some recent updates to tonight’s event,” father spoke eloquently but serious. “We are to host a feast beforehand.”

“With whom?” I asked.

“Several high-ranking officers in the Empire,” my mother clarified, seeming uneasy.

“Is there something wrong with them?”

“Lord Vader will be in attendance; we are to escort him and the others personally to the ball.”

There was a moment of silence, my mom looking at my dad like they were telepathically speaking. Her body language was obviously tensed, his similar.

“Who called for this?” I wondered.

“Emperor Palpatine personally asked of it, since he cannot attend this year due to a personal emergency,” dad explained.

“Of course, I understand,” I said.

“Good, you must get ready right away, it is already later than usual,” mom advised. “Arrive at the gaming room, we shall entertain them while all the guests arrive.”

“I will see you then,” I waved to them, standing up as Skai shadowed me.

The moment the doors shut again, and I was out of the public eye, Skai dropped her mannerisms and drew her mouth agape. I watched her press her weight to it, like she wanted to make sure she wasn’t heard.

“Lord Vader?!” Skai whisper-shouted to me as we made our way back to my quarters. “I mean—I knew he was going to be there, but to dinner? Being escorted?”

“If the emperor wills it, we don’t have much of a choice,” I shrugged.

“He is referenced to as the Dark Lord (Y/N),” Skai’s voice was laced with fear. “If I mess one thing up, I could die.”

“So, evade him all you can, nothing will happen,” I assured.

Vader was Lord of the Sith, and Palpatine’s right hand. He was the most powerful force user in the galaxy, like a guard dog to the emperor. He could destroy a planet’s population with no question, he had destroyed many planet’s populations with no question. It was said that darkness followed everywhere he went, his attitude ruthless and unmerciful. It was do or die, and if you didn’t do something right, you died anyways. Everyone knew of his name and what it meant, and only the current rebellion went against it.

Once we got to my room several other handmaidens arrived, makeup, accessories, and outfits in hand. It would be several hours of prodding, but I didn’t mind, I knew it was for the best. I allowed them to get the upper hand, strategizing about the night in the process.

After showering, applying traditional Ethereaan makeup, putting on my dress made for the event, and styling my hair, I was complete. I tried to help as much as I could, but the handmaidens refused every time I raised a hand. The hours flew by naturally by conversation, the time quickly running out. All that was left now was to slip on a pair of heels. I needed to wear a pair that was significant and matched well, but were also easy to move in. There was no doubt I would be dancing tonight, and I knew I’d get blisters if I wasn’t careful.

“All done,” Skai sighed satisfactory.

“Thank you, all of you,” I said, standing and getting a feel for the shoes.

“Of course, milady,” they spoke synchronized, before quickly dismissing themselves.

I watched awkwardly as they left my room, before turning back to my friend and following. The gaming room was on the way to the large dining area, it was like a casino, with a vast number of activities inside. I visited it often when I was free, knowing how to entertain others being a part of my role. A side of me genuinely enjoyed it, often playing against the handmaidens or Skai specifically.

An assortment of lights decorated the place, Skai and I both looking around and taking it in. All the machines had their mechanisms. The Dejarik tables, better known as holochess, blinked in the back of the room. The Sabacc cards were littered around their designated surfaces. The arcade games lined the walls, an assortment of pinball machines taking most of the space. Finally, the pool tables caught my eye, sitting pre-prepared with all fifteen balls set in a triangular shape.

I walked over, picking a pool cue that fit my hand and motioning to hit the white cue ball. I hadn’t played in a while, but I decided it would do.

“I think someone is coming,” Skai told me, as other servants began to filter in. They were carrying drinks, ready to handout.

We both watched the door, and before either of us could spark another conversation it abruptly opened. There were two guards holding either side, and I saw my mother at the front of the crowd.

“You may entertain yourselves here as we await other guests,” she said, welcoming the several men behind her. “This is Grand Admiral Thrawn, Admiral Motti, Admiral Piett, Director Krennic, Admiral Yularen, and Grand Moff Tarkin,” the queen introduced. “Esteemed guests, this is your majesty, Princess (Y/N),” my mother then introduced myself.

“Pleased to meet you all,” I bowed my head obediently.

“We are still waiting on a few, so I shall leave you to it.”

I nodded my mom off, quickly going to personally introduce myself as she left. I shook all their hands, meeting their eyes and acknowledging them. The servants soon followed, offering light alcoholic beverages on a silver platter. I watched as the guards held the doors for several storm troopers as my mom transitioned out. They all silently lined the room, watching in case of emergency. There was always rumor of the rebellion, people trying to take shots at the Empire. Especially at an event like this, security was called for, although I wasn’t sure if anyone would have the gut to do anything with Lord Vader here.

“There is an assortment of games to choose from, I am going to play pool if anyone would like to join me?” I offered.

“I would be honored your majesty,” the odd one out said. He had blue skin, navy hair, and a white uniform.

Thrawn, I repeated his name in my mind as I walked over to the table. The rest followed, making conversation amongst themselves. It seemed they were more interested in watching than playing separately, which I didn’t mind at all. It would be easier to keep track of everyone that way, as more guests arrived.

“You may go first,” I ushered as he picked a pool cue from the rack.

“Thank you,” his smooth but deep voice gratified.

He leaned over the table, his hand outstretched so that the shaft of the stick laid between the thumb and pointer finger. Drawing it outwards, the tip bumped into the cue ball and against the triangle of colored ones. A stripped ball fell into the top left hole, meaning he could shoot again.

I stepped away from the table, allowing for the Chiss to move freely. He went to the right, attempting to hit another stripped ball into the top left. It was better he did so, since that meant he’d be two balls down. It was an easy shot, slipping in gently into the pouch. The admiral smiled victoriously, looking up at me with red eyes.

“Have you played this before?” Director Krennic asked after sipping on his drink. He held the champagne cup almost cockily.

“A few times as of recent, yourself, Director?” Thrawn rebutted.

“Yes,” he sounded amused. It was apparent that he was questionable of the Chiss and his species but wouldn’t openly admit it. “What about you, your highness?”

“Yes, I grew up learning an assortment of activities including this one,” I said, as Thrawn missed his third shot.

My gown flowed as I paced to the other side of the table and looked at my options. The balls were cluttered on one end, making it hard to take an open shot. It would be best to try and angel one to ricochet off the side and into another, not to mention, I had to avoid all colored balls and the eight ball in the process. I was now deep in thought, strategizing while in movement.

Looking at the ball I wanted to hit, I angled the shaft of the cue and bent over. Aiming for the ball, I hit the tip slightly harder than the Admiral, and watched it clash with the wall then the other ball. It slid into the top right corner easily, offering me a second chance.

“Impressive,” Thrawn mused, making me smile.

I lined myself up once more with another ball, a clear opening being made due to my previous shot. I sunk it in once, more tying my score with his. This made the others become more intrigued, quitting their conversation, and coming to watch the game. The setup was now difficult, as the only shot I could sink would most likely be my last. I did it anyways, pressing my hand down onto the tables fabric and practicing the movement. I hit the ball lower than previous, making it roll into the left middle pocket, the cue ball along with it.

I laughed, making the rest of the room join in comfortably, motioning for the Grand Admiral to take the ball. He could now position it wherever he wanted, looking to the bottom right pocket where his previous ball landed. His expression was calculated, like the war general he was. The game was close, too close for anyone to predict its outcome. Thrawn continued to slip the ball in and went for another hit, while an unfamiliar noise came from the hall.

All of the imperials turned, including the Chiss, several adjusting how they appeared. It sounded like a respirator, a methodical breathing sound that was almost rhythmic. I knew it was him.

The doors opened more rigidly this time, and there he stood, my parents behind him.

He was taller than my father, with broad shoulders that held up his cloak. His entire outfitting was black, with armor fitted over a tunic, and a belt meeting his waist where his lightsaber hung. The most prominent feature was his mask, slightly tinted red visors with a modulator at the front. You couldn’t tell whether he was looking at you or not because of it, and no one knew what he looked like underneath in the first place.

I felt something cold run up my back, seeing the others also find a similar fate. It didn’t affect me though, still standing straight with my head facing the Sith. Everyone nodded their head, whispering a ‘my lord’ in harmony. The cold lingered, like it was sitting on my shoulders, wrapping around my figure.

“There are still a few more guests we must attend to,” my father clasped his hands. “We will return.”

“I missed my last shot, your majesty,” Thrawn said right after. I didn’t see it for myself, but I was at no disadvantage by it.

The crowd willingly turned back to the game, seemingly preferring to look at this than the dark lord. I noted that Skai had disappeared as I went back to playing, taking in the situation at hand.

The balls were now all spread across the surface, distanced enough that it was easy to take a shot anywhere. There were nine left, eight if you didn’t include the one you could hit.

The eight ball was guarding the top right pocket, while the cue ball currently sat between the right middle section. My best and only bet was trying to angle my shot so that it would hit the top wall and knock into the other with enough force. That way it would roll into the bottom left corner, since all the other shots were crowded with striped balls.

I needed to hit it hard, my hand placement carefully holding the shaft of the stick. This was my only option, I reminded myself, as I went to hit the cue ball.

“Why take that risk when there are several easier shots?” Grand Moff Tarkin asked.

“If I were to hit this one,” I pointed to the ball that stood by the top left corner. “I would make it, but then wouldn’t be able to hit another.”

“So, you are taking a risker shot instead, in hopes of gaining the lead,” he finished. “And you have trust in yourself that you can do it?”

“I do,” I said.

“Well go ahead then, I apologize for the interruption,” Tarkin ushered.

I nodded and smiled, bending down again to become leveled with the pool cue. I inhaled, getting a feel for the shaft again before exhaling and following through. The ball hit the wall, clashing with the other, and landing almost perfectly into the hole.

“Impressive,” Thrawn murmured.

I went to take another shot but before I could the doors behind us opened and we all shifted.

“It is time for dinner,” my father announced, a few more imperials behind him.

The guests began to follow the king and queen out, but not before I stopped Thrawn.

“I can take that if you like,” I waved my hand out, ushering for his pool cue.

“Thank you, your majesty,” he handed it to me softly, his hand grazing mine. “You are very talented.”

“Thank you, I enjoyed playing,” I admitted.

I put both cues’ away, before returning and noticing that the Chiss had waited for me. With a soft expression he waved for us to walk together, into the corridors of the palace. I couldn’t see the crowd ahead, due to Vader’s cape billowing in front of us as we left. We were all very close and compact though, and due to my knowledge of the layout it wasn’t an issue. I simply walked with my hands behind my back, as we made conversation.

“Your planet is beautiful, the best venue so far for this event.”

“I agree, I am glad we’ve been given the opportunity to do this,” I nodded.

“Do you explore the city often?” he asked.

“Yes, when I can I like to interact with it as much as possible,” I answered.

“Perhaps I will have to see it for myself.”

We stopped at a dead end, the entrance to the dining room now in front of us. I turned around, hearing a rolling sound, only to see my sister in her wheelchair, and Skai behind. Thrawn quickly noticed as well, bowing his head to her before entering the large room. It was magnificent, a long table with an uncountable number of chairs around it, and large chandelier overhead. Banners and windows decorated the walls, our family crest imprinted on most.

It was a known thing that Lord Vader didn’t sit or eat at events, so a chair wasn’t offered for him. Instead, nametags located each person to their seat, my parents sitting at the front of the table. Next to my father on the left side was my sister, then myself, then Grand Moff Tarkin. Grand Admiral Thrawn was next to my mother, the Director next to him, and a stream of admirals down both sides. We all pulled out our own seats, Karai sitting in her wheelchair close to the table. Lord Vader came to Tarkins side, standing behind the two of us. His shadow would have entirely covered me if the light wasn’t in front of us. I didn’t think much of it though, instead turning my attention to my sister as glasses of water were set down on the table.

“Are you excited?” I asked her, forming sign language with my hands.

‘Kind of, I hope the food is good,’ she answered.

“I’m sure it will be,” I answered, continuing to sign to her.

She didn’t enjoy large events like this, the crowds and lights often overstimulating her. She would most likely be at the ball for a bit in the beginning and then circle around the venue with Skai, where less people were.

“Can you speak fluently in sign?” Grand Moff Tarkin asked me.

“Yes, I chose to learn it at a young age,” I told him.

“Why?” he wondered. “I thought a child would not be motivated to take on such a tedious task.”

I noticed Vader turned his helmet, looking down at me as I spoke.

“I wanted to be able to communicate with my sister in a way that was convenient for her,” I said.

“Even though it was laborious for yourself?”

“I never found it laborious to begin with, I only thought about what it would do for her.”

“Your actions are commendable, Princess (Y/N), the emperor has spoken highly of you,” Tarkin commented.

“I am honored,” I thanked him.

My father made a toast before the food was served and soon enough, we were eating. I felt odd for most of the process, although I couldn’t place why. It was like someone was watching me, like something was resting on my shoulders, a comforting weight that felt protective. I thought it would leave once we made our way to the venue, but it never did, it just lingered.

The walk there was calming. After a long dinner and discussion, we were outside while the sun set, walking on the docks over to the ballroom. It was separated from the palace, but still on the lands where it was located, surrounded by the lakes. The sun set over us, while the trees shaded patches of the path we walked on. I was at the front of the crowd, walking with my sister and Skai while my parents spoke to Tarkin behind. It seemed everyone was still on edge due to the dark lord, Skai especially being unnerved, as he walked right behind her.

I looked at her as she held a death grip on my sister’s wheelchair, attempting to look as professional as possible. My face was like stone, remaining neutral without a hint of discontent. The only thing on my mind was the conversation behind me, my fathers authoritative voice being hard to block out.

“Do you plan to continue aiding the Empire in the future, and extending the contract?” Tarkin asked my father.

“Yes, we hope to.”

“Hoping and doing have two separate meanings,” a baritone voice replied, the sound of Lord Vader’s breathing stopping when it came. I knew it was him, for the first time this entire night, he had spoken.

“Of course, my lord, we will extend the contact when the time comes,” my father said, almost timidly.

The conversation was cut short at that moment, reaching the venue. You could hear the noise coming from inside, the sound of a live orchestra, and talking specifically. Hundreds of people stood, lights blaring as food was served by droids and music filled the ears of everyone passing. The doors opened and an uproar of cheers followed, welcoming the main hosts into the room.

The night went smoothly but rather quickly. I couldn’t count how many people I had spoken with, let alone had to dance with. That included Thrawn, who was the first to ask when he had the chance. I mostly traveled around, meeting people, and greeting anyone and everyone I saw. I hadn’t seen my parents much, but that was a natural consequence in this kind of arena.

The most prominent people were the storm troopers, who lined the entire space. They were clones, taken from the previous war and recommissioned after the republic fell. The way you could tell was their voice, all of them having the same accent when speaking. Skai thought they were cute; I knew she was around here somewhere. Occasionally I’d check to see if she was dancing with someone in the center, but it hadn’t seemed to happen yet.

This was one of those times, as I weaved through tables of congregating people and made my way to the dance floor. I looked at the duos of people slowly swaying with one another, hoping to point out her straight black hair in the crowd. She still seemed to have disappeared, but I didn’t mind it as long as she was fine. The time would come, and I would never let her live it down when it did.

I turned around, sighing almost defeatedly when I saw that someone had approached me. The people that were once close to me had spread out and turned their backs, the reason why standing dead in my tracks. I looked up, as a shadow towered over my figure. It was only now that I realized the weight on my shoulders never left.

“Your highness, I did not get to properly make an acquaintance with you earlier, I do apologize,” Lord Vader said.

“Oh, no worries my lord,” I replied.

“Have you had the opportunity to dance with anyone?” he asked. His voice was intimidating and commanding. Vader stoked fear in anyone he came near, the exact reason why the two of us weren’t near anyone else.

“Yes, it has been quite enjoyable to be able to,” I answered.

“I presume I may as well, princess?” Vader followed up.

“Of course.”

I was extremely surprised but tried not to think much. I couldn’t even if I wanted to, becoming quickly consumed by what was about to happen. Vader lent me his hand, bringing me to where the rest were. The song had changed, the orchestra shifting to a tune that sounded romantic but not distinct enough to name.

Dancing with Thrawn had been methodical, he was incredibly experienced at it, his footwork riding against my own. The rest also had their own special touches, and as the night went on it became apparent that they shared a common goal. But that was nothing like this, this was different. I was dancing with death, the dark lord of the Sith, the most powerful man in the galaxy. He could easily snap my neck if he wanted, and yet I reminded myself he hadn’t.

The Sith’s hand was much larger than mine, his touch very strong but shockingly gentle. If I wanted to free myself, I wouldn’t be able to, but it was comfortable, not harsh. I thought it might squeeze me to death at first, but it was the pure opposite. Vader’s other hand slowly rested on the small of my waist, circling to my back. My hand sat on his breast armor, shoulder placement feeling unnatural due to height difference. His cloak covered the two of us, the front of my vision entirely corrupted by the man in black.

Finally, our other hands interlocked, mine once again becoming small in his. So far, it had been the same experience as the rest, up until I felt something creep up my back. It was that same cold wind, the weight on my shoulders spreading to my entire body, pulling me close to him. I unexpectedly wavered, what felt like a haze washing over my senses completely. It felt like something had invaded my mind, a feeling I had never experienced but was able to place. I blinked hard out of shock, assuming it would go away, but was surprised when dark tendrils came into my peripherals.

It was only for a moment, but relief came along with it. I looked around, everything was blocked out except for him. I couldn’t hear anything but the music, and Vader’s breathing.

“How?” I doubted myself, thinking I was going insane. I tried to let go of him to rub my eyes, but his grip was far too strong to attempt it.

“Do not resist,” Vader spoke. “Look at me, do not worry about anything else.”

It felt like my legs were moving on their own, and I hadn’t even realized I was still dancing until I looked up at him. It was the force, all of this, was him. I felt helplessly relaxed in his hold, protected beyond compare. It was like his presence was everywhere, all consuming and invading. This was not the same experience as the rest, it was better. I found myself entranced, and enjoying this, as the lights felt like they had dimmed.

Still a million thoughts ran through my mind, wondering why this was happening in the first place. He showed affection for no one, most thought if he was to marry it would be with another Sith if it was possible. They thought he was too powerful for anyone else, that he couldn’t love someone.

“Sith do not have to marry one another.”

My eyes widened up at him, realizing the rumor that he read minds was true. Suddenly, I felt vulnerable, wondering if the crowds also heard his words. Part of me wondered what the people would think of this in general, whether the Empire would point it out in the tabloids. I had no shame in dancing with him, but it could change my planet’s reputation forever.

“No one can hear this conversation but the two of us, this event will not be remembered by anyone if you do not wish for it,” the Sith read my mind for the second time, and I felt my face heat up.

“How is that possible?” I asked. I believed his words; my question was out of genuine curiosity.

“Search your feelings, your memories will remind you,” Vader ushered.

The conversation between Skai and I replayed in my mind. I knew, I just didn’t want to admit how powerful he truly was. I didn’t want to admit how much I was enjoying this. The fact that I condoned his merciless killing, and the fact I was in the arms of a man that could do horrific things without blinking an eye.

“I didn’t know you enjoyed dancing,” I admitted, hoping to shift the conversation.

“I don’t.”

“We can stop,” I assured him almost naturally. “I don’t want this to bother you.”

“No, this does not apply,” the force kept me in place as he spoke.

“How so?”

“Because the reason you offered to stop, you differentiate from every single person in this vicinity.”

“I understand,” I maintained eye contact, swallowing almost nervously, because in truth I had no clue what he meant.

“Do you?” he asked me.

“I want to,” I said.

“You shall.”

The cold feeling that once laid on my back now felt warm, a tingly sensation in my mind that rested gently. The song ended, and we stayed together, the haze around me fading. Once I noticed, I was quick to take in my surroundings, easing back into the sound of chattering. My sights rested on a girl with long, straight black hair, and a tall man with blonde shaved hair and strong jawline.

She seemed to notice too, her eyes locking onto mine, and within and instant, Vader turned to see what shocked me so much. Skai looked owlish, holding onto a clone who had different armor than the rest. She looked me up and down, as I remained a neutral face, but a slight waver in my lips made it clear I agreed with her surprise. She had danced with the Storm Troopers captain, while I had danced with the lord of the Sith.

I watched as Skai looked up to meet Vader’s gaze and immediately looked away. She was terrified, but also flustered looking at the clone before her. He was handsome, not my type, but handsome.

I returned to Vader, having yet to be released from his grasp, his respirators sound being the most consistent thing of the night.

“Thank you, your highness,” he said, as if nothing happened.

“It was an honor, my lord,” I left in harmony with him, the two of us splitting.

I needed fresh air, to get away from the overwhelming lack of space amidst the crowd. I saw Skai leaving too, heading towards the opposite door that I was. I assumed she was returning to Karai, who most likely was outside. My heart rate picked up; I could feel it.

I hurried towards the outdoor corridor, swallowing harshly as I met the cold nights air. I needed something, anything to snap me out of whatever just happened. I was intrigued of all things, a part of me wondering if it would ever happen again. The sound of Vader’s breathing had disappeared in exchange for crickets chirping in by the tall grasses and the sound of the lake water moving about. All of it so harmonious and yet I couldn’t relax to it. I needed something new to latch onto, something that would stay constant.

It sounded like something pressurized hit a surface. I looked around, to see absolutely nothing different, and yet there was now a repetitive beeping sound ringing in my ears. At first, I thought I was hallucinating, forcing myself to create the pattern in my mind so that I would calm down. It was only when it began to speed up that I realized the severity of the situation.

My eyes wandered to the stain glass window as my hands held onto the rail behind me. I looked just a bit closer at it, to see a subtle blinking light on a small circular dome. It was only a moment later that the noise got too fast, and I saw the door at the end of the hall open, but there was no time to see who it was. The sound was so loud that it felt like my eardrums blocked it out, a fire of red and orange fumigating my senses as I tried to cover my face with one arm. It was a stupid move I decided, closing my eyes shut, only for them not to open.

FIRST CHAPTERRR its totally not like 5k words but wtv it only gets better from here.

NOTE: Karai's disabilities are based on my experiences IRL since I have family who struggles with it. Hope you enjoyed!

#darth vader x reader #darth vader imagine #star wars x reader #suitless darth vader x reader

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a-random-pillow · 7 months

Text

Crack Ashoka Theory

The Ezra and Thrawn we just met? Those two are both night sister creations meant to infuriate both the republic and empire.

The real Thrawn and Ezra could be anywhere

Maybe they left along time ago and are running with the chiss or having wild space adventures

Maybe they are running form night sisters on the other side of the planet

Maybe they are in prison

Why do the night sisters hate the Jedi so much? A smart or skilled one could blow their whole plan up.

The little turtle guys? Work for the night sisters

The reason the Blueberries are so… basic is because they’re how the night sisters think they would act.

#star wars #star wars rebels #ezra bridger #thrawn #ezra and thrawn #ezra and thrawn space adventure #ahsoka #ashoka series

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x-0ophelia0-x · 7 months

Note

What if…. Ezra x fem reader, where at first during the “ghost crew” days Reader was best friends with Sabene, but also had a massive crush on her… then Ezra came along, she got a good look at this sassy Cutie with dreamy eyes~ 👀

And immediately clocked that he also probably had a crush on Sabene, reader went “NoPe! I am NOT loosing to this blue eyed babe!” 😤 (and completely missed that she’s also attracted to him..)

After awhile she realized she’s already fallen inlove with Ezra, and she’s known she no longer has a crush on her best friend Sabene for at least a year..in fact she and Sabene now have a more close Sisterly relationship… but it’s too late to say anything, because the day she finally realizes her true feelings is the day they lost Ezra.. and he left her a com recording confessing his feelings to reader.. but now she has no way to tell him that she feels the same.

She’s broken.. rarely speaks to anyone other then her family in the Ghost crew.. and even then it’s not much, and barely above a whisper, but she and Sabene never give up, practically obsessed with bringing Ezra back home.. Sabene to bring back her adopted brother, and reader to give Ezra a slap upside the head for having done such a dangerous stunt.. and then to tackle him in a kiss, till his whole face is as blue as his beautiful eyes.. just to make sure he knows how she feels..

And because they’re basically sisters, Sabene tells Ezra how reader has brutally rejected everyone who’s been interested in her since his absence.. no dick left un-kicked or face left un-punched if they tried to flirt with her past an obvious rejection..

You can’t imagine how much I love this. Like fr. I have school today and it’s nearly 3 AM-. It took some time though since I wanted to get the beginning as perfectly as I could, even rewatched the first episodes of Rebels for this one haha

anywayyy, I hope you like this! Turned out to be my longest ff I‘ve ever written-

a heartfelt confession.

pairings: Fem!Reader x Ezra Bridger

warnings: hurt to comfort

word count: 5,5K

summary: You had a massive crush on Sabine. One day, a guy named Ezra appeares in your life’s, joining the Ghost crew and also taking interest in Sabine. You wouldn’t loose to him though. There’s just something that you fail to notice, your newly developed feelings for him. When you finally realize them and much later even feel ready to confess to him, your paths get separated for what feels like forever. Chopper then shows you a hologram of him, confessing to you. You’re broken but you and Sabine eventually find him.

authors note: I already said some things above but I once again wanted to thank you for your request, had a lot of fun writing it!! Here’s another ff to our beloved blueberry’s collection!

enjoy <33

Time was something you just assumed that you’d always have. It made you numb to the things you already had, not appreciating them enough.

And it was too late for you when you finally realized it.

That time wasn’t always by your side.

„Where are we headed to today?“

You asked Hera as you and Sabine entered the room and sat down right behind her in the Ghost‘s cockpit.

She typed in some coordinates in the system, ready to jump into hyperspace while chopper started ranting about something he disliked again.

„We‘re going to Lothal. Visago sent us an message about some crates with weapons inside. We can’t let the empire have them.“

„Alright then“

Sabine said, fixing up her helmet while you watched her.

You couldn’t help but feel the warmth starting to rise inside you again.

Since the day you joined the ghost crew you started to develop a crush for her.

And the fact that you both shared the same cabin didn’t help.

„Ready to kick some bucketheads butts y/n?“

Sabine then asked, shifting her gaze to yours and you nodded, feeling excited about this mission. You didn‘t tell her about your crush on her, you didn’t have the guts and you didn’t even know if she’d be attracted to you anyway.

„Readier then ever“

Let’s say that your mission didn’t really go as you all planned. Some blue haired idiot decided to interfere and you, Zeb and Kanan spent your already stressed out afternoon by chasing him since he stole some crates.

Kanan however decided to help him and bring him on the Ghost when they where spotted by TIE-Pilots.

When you opened the crates, revealing the weapons inside them, his eyes widened in shock

„Do you know how much they’re worth on the black market??“

He asked with hints of excitement in his voice.

„Don’t get stupid ideas brat“

Zeb then said, shoving the boy to the side.

„Why is he here anyway?“

You could feel Zeb‘s disinterest in having the boy onboard. Not knowing the answer to his question too, you just shrugged.

„Guess that Kanan saw something in him“

Sabine spoke up.

„He managed to steal the crate after all“

She added, leaning herself against the wall while she looked at your direction. Smirking because some random brat managed to trick you.

„hey! I didn’t expect some random guy to interfere, alright?“

„Of corse you didn’t“

Sabine teased, enjoying the reaction she got from you.

„Who are you guys anyway?“

The boy then asked, his gaze shifting from yours to Sabines and to Zeb‘s.

You kind of got distracted by his eyes. The blue was so vibrant, almost as if it wasn‘t from this galaxy. Your gazes stayed locked for a moment until Zeb spoke up.

„We are the ghost crew“

He said, starting to make his way closer to the boy. When he was close enough, he tripped. The TIE fighters managed to land a hit on the Ghost, leading to Zeb falling down, landing on the boy.

„Get.. up..! I can’t breathe!“

He whisper yelled, struggling to breathe.

„Hey, I‘m not that heavy under normal conditions“

Zeb said, standing up while the boy took a deep breath.

„I didn’t mean your weight.. I meant your smell“

He said, holding his nose shut while he shoved the air away from him.

That seemed to pull a string in Zeb‘s temper.

��You don’t like the air quality here huh?“

He asked, looking down at the boy before him.

„Let me bring you to your own room!“

Zeb then added, grabbing the boys leg and shoving him into a small container like metallic box.

„No.. no no!“

He was cut short when Zeb closed the door.

„Stupid brat“

Sabine and you then started laughing. The fact that Zeb, a grown Lasat lost his temper to some boy‘s comment on his smell was hilarious to you.

„He really didn’t twice about telling you this“

Sabine said between her laughs.

„Straight to your face“

You added, needing to catch your breath since this was the funnies thing you ever saw after Chopper and Zeb‘s rivalry.

„Let’s go, the fight is not over yet“

Sabine then said, gesturing you to follow her and you did.

Unbeknownst to you, the boy you all just met managed to escape from his ‚room‘ by opening the vent and using the small room to enter another part of the ship.

He soon noticed that it was part of the defense system when he saw the big blasters. And this was the moment when he realized that he wasn’t on Lothal anymore.

„I‘m in.. space…“

He said in awe, looking up to the stars, a sight he didn’t expect to see in his life.

He was excited but it didn’t last long when he noticed the TIE Fighters flying towards them, shooting at them.

„and I‘m going to die!“

He kind of yelled, his excitement turning into fear.

It didn’t last long though, shortly after he heard another round of blaster followed by the sight of one TIE Fighter getting destroyed.

„wow..“

He didn’t know them for long, in fact, he just met them after he stole from them, but they seemed to be strong. He was deep in his thoughts, not noticing you and Sabine entering the small room and dragging him away from the seat.

Sabine then took off her helmet, staring down at him before she sat down, shooting at the remaining TIE fighters. The boy went speechless after seeing her, looking at her with wide eyes. You noticed that, not blaming him since you felt the same way. But he of corse couldn’t keep his mouth shut.

„My name is Ezra, and what is yours..?“

He asked or better, tried to flirt.

You still stood behind him, trying your best not to laugh.

But you failed. Seconds later Zeb entered the small room too, grabbing Ezra by his shoulders and turning him to his direction, looking straight into his eyes.

„I‘m Zeb, you loath rat!“

Sabine and you once again started to laugh your asses off, the change in Ezra’s face was way too funny. He went from ‚hey babe, wanna watch the stars together‘ to ‚no! please don’t kill me‘ very fast.

But something with him worried you. He seemed to take a interest in Sabine too and you were sure that you wouldn’t loose to this blue eyed idiot.

There was another thing though.. his eyes… they somehow always seemed to find a way to impress you. You didn’t think too much into that at first, but you started to notice a new feeling building up inside you whenever he was close.

Some time passed since Ezra joined your crew.

It was a struggle at first but you all soon grew close together. Ezra was sharing a cabin with Zeb, something you still found hilarious considering their first conversation being about Zeb’s smell.

Ezra and you even became very close friends. The first thing you do after every mission now being to meet up at the small room where he firstly ever tried to flirt with Sabine, talking about how the mission went for each one.

„I even managed to steal a helmet! This guy‘s aim was so embarrassing“

He said, looking proudly at his ‚trophy‘ , his voice laced with an excitement you now couldn’t imagine to live without.

But you couldn’t help but feel worried for him. Todays mission left scars behind, physical and emotional.

„There was also this Inquisitor.. I really thought that I‘d die the moment his blade flew past my face“

His tone now was more serious compared to his excitement from before.

„Kanan thought that I died..“

He looked down, recalling todays events. You noticed his struggle and you wanted to help him, but you didn’t really know how.

„Hey.. Ezra look at me“

You said, lifting your hand to Cup his cheek with the scars. Gently turning his head to you again, locking gazes with him.

„It’s not your fault.. I‘m just happy that you‘re well. Safe and sound and most importantly, right here with us“

Something in his eyes then changed while hearing your words. They seemed to relax, be more at ease then the stressed ones from before.

He leaned into your touch, letting your words sink in.

„Thank you..“

He then said, looking up to you again. You couldn’t help but notice the same feeling you felt for some time now. Whenever he was around you or you both shared your moments, talking about the missions, a strange feeling managed to make it‘s way up to you.

„You don’t have to thank me you idiot“

You then chuckled, taking your hand away from his face and then opening your arms.

„Does lil Ezra need a hug?“

A teasing tone made its way to your question, accompanied by a smirk.

„You’re just one week older“

He then said, crossing his arms.

„I know, you’re still younger then me though“

You said, chuckling again as you took a step closer.

„Now, do you want that hug or should I just give it to Zeb“

Ezra didn’t wait any longer and opened up his arms, letting you to take him into your embrace.

„You know.. it’s dangerous to hug that Lasat in your fragile age. His smell would’ve permanently destroy your nose“

It was his turn now to tease you.

„Hey! I‘m not that much older!“

You faked an hurt undertone, failing to hold your laugh back.

„You decided to call me lil Ezra, prepare to live with the consequences“

He said, shrugging while he also failed to hold his laugh back.

Moments like these made you two grow closer and soon enough you didn’t even care anymore about him liking Sabine.

You even started to notice that your crush on her wasn’t as intense as it was before you met Ezra.

And if you weren’t completely delusional right now, you noticed that Ezra stopped his attempts of flirting with her.

You didn‘t understand it back then. How could you? Everything was so simple and you basically had everything you needed. But things never stay the way they are, this was the most important thing you learned throughout your life.

And there was something you failed to notice, the true meaning behind that mysterious new feeling you always had around him.

Some years passed by by now.

You no longer had a crush on Sabine, that was something you knew for over a year now. Instead you realized the fact that you not only had a crush on Ezra, no, but you also fell in love with your blue eyed idiot.

Your meetings with him after every mission became something like a routine, something you both couldn’t live without.

Even if you didn’t have missions on some days, you always managed to find some free time in order to spend it together. Exchanging stories, eating your rations together, sharing embarrassing moments of your lives and just spend time together.

His eyes became something you wanted to fight for. Something you knew that you needed. They resembled the peace you all fought for and they also made your heart skip a beat a few times whenever they looked at you.

And the same goes for him. His crush on Sabine back then didn’t last long.

He infact had a crush on you. From the moment you both continued to lock your gazes, whenever you two meet up to talk about your day, he realized that he developed feelings for you.

And when you offered him your comfort after his encounter with the Grand Inquisitor, he was sure of what he felt towards you.

His only problem was that he didn’t know how to confess his feelings to you.

Ezra was scared that you didn’t like him back and that your friendship would be ruined by his confession. So he decided to stay silent, to continue talking to you, hiding his emotions while he deeply wished to find the courage he needed.

Years later, just moments after Kanan died, he once again found himself in your embrace. Crying into your shoulder while he was at his lowest he ever found himself in since the Ghost crew took him in.

You held him close, trying to give him some comfort while you struggled with it yourself.

And as if this wasn’t enough for him, there was also something, a feeling of unease, telling him that something bad would happen.

Visions of him loosing everyone he cared for. Visions of him loosing you.

So he did what he thought was the best. He called for chopper, brought him to his cabin while everyone was distracted by their tasks, recording himself, reassuring the crew that he was alright, just in case that something bad would really happen.

And it did.

You all were on Lothal. Planning to save the city from the empires clutches. It even worked out pretty well, but hey, everyone’s luck eventually runs out right?

Ezra was now on the Chimaera, Thrawns flagship. Purrgils entered Lothals atmosphere, flying towards the Chimaera, holding the ship tight with their tentacles.

Everything went by so fast. The last thing you remembered being Ezra standing right next to you, reassuring you that he’d be safe.

„I have to tell you something.. when this is over“

„Me too..“

„Ezra.. please… please stay safe“

You couldn’t help but fail to hold back your tear any longer.

He noticed that, placing his hand to your cheek, swiping away the single tear that managed to escape.

„I will.. I promise“

He said, knowing that he wouldn’t see you again.

His gaze being concentrated on you. Taking in every feature of your face, your body, your scent and especially your eyes.

You did the same, something deep within you warning you that you’d regret it if you didn’t take in every detail of him.

„Come back“

„I can’t promise that..“

„Then try it.. at least“

„I can’t promise that either..“

„.. I know“

When you two were ready, you helped Sabine distracting Hera and the others while Ezra made his way up to the vent.

„One last time“

Was everything you heard from him before he jumped.

And now?

„Ezra get away from there!“

You heard Hera yell at her comm link. Stressed since you all knew what the blue lights on the purrgils meant.

„I can’t.. I have to see this through“

Ezra told her, sounding scared himself.

„Ezra! I‘m begging you! Please!“

You cried out, not wanting to loose him. Not after everything you all went through. Not after you were finally ready to confess your feelings to him.

The purrgils then started to take off. Which made you panic even more.

„… remember, the force will be with you.. always“

And he was gone, just like that.

„No!!!“

You screamed from the top of your lungs, falling down to your knees while your tears started to roam down your face freely.

Sabine rushed to you side, pulling you close to her as you continued to cry.

„Chopper! I want you to calculate the Chimaeras course! We need to find him!“

Hera yelled, hoping that they’d find him in time, but Chopper didn’t really know how to help.

„What do you mean..“

She asked him after he gave her a series of beeps, sounding very concerned.

„What do you mean by telling me that it’s impossible..?“

She asked again, this time in disbelief.

He then tried to explain that the purrgils course wasn’t something he could calculate since they didn’t travel with their systems. The space whales had their own, and this was the reason why Chopper and nobody else would ever be able to trace the Chimaeras course down.

You all then met at the ghosts crews cockpit. Hera, Sabine, Zeb and you, after Chopper told you that he had to show you something.

It was a hologram of Ezra. Telling you that he knew that this day would come.

How he felt that unease taking the upper hand from him, how he knew that he had to stop Thrawn, even if it meant to risk his own life too.

Ezra told his goodbyes, he left a message for everyone, except for you.

„wait.. it’s over..? already?“

You asked, your voice barely above a whisper.

Sabine was confused too. He didn’t mention you in this hologram, why?

Chopper then again beeped something, this time to you. He used his small metallic ‚hands‘ to take yours and slowly walk with you towards your cabin, where you would be alone.

„Chopper.. what do you want to tell me?“

You asked, defeated and still trying to process everything that happened today.

Instead of beeping again he just put on another hologram, it was Ezra.

„Hey y/n..“

He said, his voice causing you to again form tears at your eyes.

„if you see this that’d mean that I really went on with that silly plan..“

He continued, holding his hand to his neck, seeming nervous about something.

„I hope that it worked.. that you’re safe from Thrawns threat and that I somehow survived what I am planning to do“

His gaze now shifted to you, his blue eyes still had the same effect on you that they always had.

„There’s another recording, one that is meant for everyone to see and I‘m sorry that I didn’t mention you there.. I just thought that you deserved your own recording.. and I didn’t want to put it on the same one I made for the others.. you know?“

Ezra now stopped talking, looking around, not knowing how to confess to you, knowing that he wouldn’t be able to confess to you in person. He then took a deep sigh.

„I fell in love with you y/n“

He said, causing your heart to skip a beat.

„I realized it for some time now.. you know… it started with a crush just before that thing with the Grand Inquisitor happened“

He trailed off, chuckling at his thoughts.

„Maker it’s already been this long..“

„However… I was scared of how you’d react.. didn’t really want to destroy our friendship.. loosing my best friend, risking you thinking that I was a creep or something. So I decided to stay silent.. not my best decision though“

You saw how he swiped away a tear that rolled down his face.

„I’ll regret it.. not confessing to you in person because you deserve it.

You showed me the light when I wasn’t able to see it, helped me through my lowest moments and I may be delusional.. but I think.. that you… maybe… feel the same?“

„You think?“

Was all you could say before you broke down, not wanting to hold your tears back any longer.

„I really want to confess to you in person.. it’s kinda strange after all.. I‘m literally telling Chopper the words ‚I love you‘ right now… geeez I‘d really give everything to see your reaction.. to know if you actually liked me back“

„I don’t like you.. you idiot“

You managed to say in between your sobs.

„I love you“

Your voice shivered and you couldn’t help but cry even more.

„I want you to know that I will always think of you.. I‘ll make sure to never forget the warm sound of your voice.. your eyes and and the way how you look in general.

I don’t know if we’ll ever see each other again.. I don’t even know if I’ll survive this plan.. but if I do… if you have any reason to believe that I‘m still alive.. please come and find me“

You then heard your muffled voice trough the hologram, calling out for him.

„Seems like you already found me“

He chuckled, walking closer to chopper, ready to end the recording.

„I love you y/n. I always have and I always will.. may the force be with you..“

He looked down, starting to laugh at what he was about to say.

„lil Ezra out“

The recording now stopped. Showing you the option to replay it.

Chopper then beeped something again, it sounded like as if he was asking you if you were alright. You just sat there, crying, letting Ezra’s words sink in.

He loved you for all this time and you didn’t notice. You still were too scared to confess and now you may never see him again.

You’ll never have the chance of letting him know that you returned his feelings. That you loved him too. It was too late.

He‘ll never know that he was loved.

„I love you too Ezra..“

You managed to whisper, each wort hurting like hell.

Realizing that you also started to develop your feelings for him around the same time as he did. You needed years to realize what that feeling was, was it was trying to tell you.

„I fucking love you you idiot!“

You cried even harder. Chopper rushed to your side to give you as much comfort as he could. And you wrapped your arms around him. Crying against bis cold metal. Holding onto him as if he was the last thing that kept your sanity together.

„I‘ll find you.. even if it’s the last thing that I’ll do“

Ten years passed and there was still no news about Ezra’s whereabouts or his well being. The Senators of the new republic already gave up their hopes of finding Ezra alive. Not wanting to waste more resources on this topic.

The lack of support only deepened the worry that took control over you.

You weren’t the same person anymore.

Nobody heard the sound of your laugh since Ezra disappeared.

You didn’t talk anymore, not as much as you did and when you did, it’s sound was barely above a whisper.

You were broken, broken beyond repair.

Your best friend.. your lover, may be in danger or dead by now, and all you could do was to hide yourself in your cabin, hoping that he’d somehow return to you again.

You were still living in the ghost. The ghost crew was your only family, you had nowhere else to go. Everyone managed to somehow move on.

Zeb trained some newcomers, Hera got the highest rank and Sabine was Ahsokas Padawan, well part time at least.

They stopped training and Sabine continued to search for Ezra, but without any luck.

They were the only persons you ever talked to after everything that happened.

Sabine grew to be basically your sister, listening to you whenever you needed someone to talk to. Helping you through your nightmares, holding you close when his loving vibrant blue eyes hunted you in your nightmares.

Dreaming of losing him everyday.

You were a shell of your once so happy spirit.

You showed her the recording where he confessed to you, told her that you felt the same. Cried whenever you told her that you loved him. How much you missed him every passing day.

He just entered your life a decade ago. Someone who managed to trick you, someone who managed to grow important to you.

Someone who managed to steal your heart.

That very someone who was scared of confessing to you, but still did because he knew that he wouldn’t come back.

That very someone who disappeared long ago, leaving your heart shattered and broken.

„It hurts..!“

You whispered, losing control of your tears once again.

„I know… I know…“

Sabine Said, trying to sound as soft as possible.

„We’ll find him… I promise… you’ll see him again“

This is how most of your nights looked like, after waking up from another nightmare.

Your life had become one.

You couldn’t even go outside.

There was always some creep trying his luck on you.

„Hey little one.. you’re adorable..“

One of the many man said, stepping closer to you.

„Stay away“

You said, your voice once again just as loud as a whisper.

„Aw come on.. you seem to be pretty alone.. let me change this okay?“

He asked, placing his hand on your cheek.

The very one Ezra once held.

This was too much for you.

You raised your leg and kicked him straight into his dick, with all the force you could use in that moment.

The man backed down, holding on onto his member, screaming out in pain.

„You bitch!“

He continued, his scream now catching Sabines attention.

„Fuck off“

Was all you said before you left for the Ghost. Sabine was just fast enough to catch sight of the guy laying on the ground, holding his ‚best part‘ as tightly as he could do somehow lessen the pain.

„Again?“

She asked you, a concerned tone in her voice.

„Yeah..“

You replied.

It was just another idiot who tried out his luck with you.

He wasn’t the first and he for sure wasn’t the last.

But it didn’t matter to you when Ahsoka showed up on Lothal.

She had found a map that could lead you to Ezra’s location.

The only problem was that she wasn’t able to open it, therefore she needed Sabines and your help.

And for the first time in like forever they saw you to slightly smile again.

Sabine then even managed to activate the map.

A lot happened after that.

You lost the map but managed to find it, only to have to make a very hard decision.

Driven by your willpower to find your lover, your Ezra, you found yourself in a rather questionable agreement with Baylan Skoll.

Sabine too. Everything she wanted was to find her ‚adopted‘ brother and bring him back. To reunite him with his family. She counted on her and she knew that this was their only opportunity.

You both travelled as prisoners onboard of the „Eye of Sion“

Reached another galaxy and the planet where Ezra was stranded.

The last few hours where crazy to say the least, but everything that mattered was what was going to happen now.

Your howlers found some crab creatures who had Sabines firebird on them.

„Do you know Ezra Bridger?“

You asked. Noticing that you didn’t call him by his full name for years now.

The creatures seemed to recognize his name and happily nodded.

Gesturing for you two to follow them.

They brought you to their village. It seemed lovely and peaceful.

So this is where Ezra was living for the past decade.

Just when you and Sabine were left alone by the crab creature, your both heard someone chuckle from behind you.

„I knew that I could count on you two“

He said and you immediately recognized who it was.

Sabine and you both turned around, looking at him standing there, leaning himself against the wall of one of the small houses.

He had grown into a man. His hair was longer now, his curls a stark contrast to the buzz cut he once had.

He had grown a beard, grown some inches taller and he had a completely new outfit.

But his eyes stayed the same.

The vibrant blue hue they had, the hope and love they held were still there.

His smile also didn’t change, it was the same heartwarming smile that made her fall in love with him in the first place, the same smile that kept her going through those unimaginable ten years.

„Ezra..!“

You finally said, losing your fight against the tears as they streamed down freely, and the same went for him.

„y/n..“

You looked at Sabine who was nodding to you that you should be the first to go to him, and so you did.

You stepped closer to him, swiping away your tears as you took his new appearance in.

When you stood in front of him you didn’t exactly know what to do.

This was the moment you longed for for so many years now, so you decided to listen to your heart.

You raised your hand and slapped him, not too strong to actually hurt him but strong enough to be able to call it a slap.

He was surprised, not knowing how to act after this.

„This is because you had me worried sick after this stunt of yours“

Ezra’s eyes widened.

„y/n I.. I‘m so-„

You then stopped him by pulling his face closer to yours with your other hand. Placing it on his cheek while you moved your other one around his torso.

Your gazes locked for once again, before you closed your eyes, connecting your lips with his, sharing your first kiss with him.

He was dumbfounded by your sudden action at first but he didn’t want to waste any second, deepening the kiss when he also placed his hand on your cheek while he rested his other to your lower back.

You both stood there like this, deepening your kiss until you both had to pull apart to catch your breath.

Your heart was beating stronger then ever, if it wasn’t for the ever growing excitement you felt, you’d believe that it was going to explode at any moment now.

„wow..“

Was all that Ezra could say, not believing that he just shared his first kiss with the person he loved.

„I love you too Ezra“

You then decided to break the silence, still holding him close.

You now felt at peace after those words left your mouth.

After confessing your feelings to him, after all those years.

„You saw the recording?“

He chuckled, looking down to you.

„Yeah I did..“

„So Chopper really kept it.. I thought he deleted it.. that droid made me record it way too many times“

Ezra said, laughing a little bit after remembering his old struggles with the said droid.

„I missed you.. so much“

He then pulled you into a tight hug.

„I missed you too… and I love you… so so much..“

You both were interrupted by Sabine though.

„If you continue your lovely reunion I might even cry, damnit!“

She said, causing you two to laugh at her statement.

„Come here“

Ezra then said, opening his arms to welcome her to your embrace, and she came.

„I‘m so happy that you found me..“

He said.. looking at the both of you.

„I can’t wait to come home“

Some hours passed and you decided to walk around the village, trying to get to know the villagers a little bit better, since they were living with Ezra for so many years now.

Ezra and Sabine sat in front of his house like thing.

„So…“

Ezra began, not knowing of how to ask this.

„Did y/n… move on?“

Sabine was taken aback by his question and Ezra didn’t fail to notice this.

„I know that we didn’t confess before but.. did she fall in love with someone else while I was here…?“

His tone was sincere and it broke Sabine, knowing that it’s been a question he asked himself for a very long time here. Not knowing anything about your life after he left.

She then chuckled, recalling the many guys attempts of flirting with you and how you coldbloodedly rejected them.

„No she didn’t“

She began. You and Sabine grew to something like sisters. She knew everything that happened to you and you knew everything that happened to her. Sabine was more then excited to tell him about your actions.

„There were a lot of guys hitting at her you know.. trying to flirt with her, kiss her, some even tried to get under her panties“

Ezra’s gaze shifted into an concerned one, afraid about what she was going to say now.

„y/n rejected them all. She left no dick unkicked and no face unpunched. They at some point stopped to hit at her because there was a rumor about her breaking their jaws, those assholes got scared and never dared to approach her again!“

He couldn’t believe his ears, you really stayed loyal to him even if you both never got the chance to confess to each other back then.

A smile found it‘s way to his face, feeling kinda proud of you.

„Did she really break their jaws?“

„She didn’t just break their jaws Ezra..“

Sabines gaze also turned into a proud one.

„Some guys who took it too far won’t be able to ever have kids now“

#ezra bridger x reader #ezra bridger #star wars rebels #star wars #ahsoka series

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akaiitori · 2 months

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Reven [2024]

As loud as their feathers are bright, Reven has learned to bite and never let go. They are outspoken and passionate, willing to go to the ends of the world in pursuit of freedom for their species.

Updated design for Rev! >:) Some trivia below

Genderqueer, uses any pronoun except 'it'

A passionate artist, they focus on street art and tattoo designs. Also a decent drummer.

Well-connected, they probably know a guy for anything you need.

Blueberries are their favourite food.

Showy and loud, they are terrible at anything stealth-based.

Really good at flight, but their skill is entirely empirical. Words like 'angle of attack’ or 'drag coefficient’ are gibberish to them.

Wings are broad and short, with gentle slotting. It allows for good maneuvering while still getting to soar, though not as effectively as a vulture.

Very, very good memory!

Stands at 160cm (of pure SWAG)

Loves wearing jewelry, in particular chain necklaces, bracelets and rings. They like anything that sparkles, but know better than to wear anything actually luxurious as it's likely he'll lose a few mid-flight

#winged people #digital art #wings #feathers #illustration #original character #reference sheet #character design #vagrant skies #reven

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wannab-urs · 6 months

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HallowReads Celebration

I'm not much of a graphic maker and I'm not great at making playlists for other people, so I decided to contribute to this lovely celebration in the way I usually celebrate fic writers in this fandom: Recs!

And listen, I know I have uhhh quite a few mutuals here. I'm not trying to leave anyone out. I love you all very much. I'm only making one of these though and there's only 4 questions lol.

My favourite fanfic I read this year

Lavender by @justagalwhowrites Description: An age-gap grumpy/sunshine friends-to-lovers (and eventually friends-to-lovers-to-enemies-to-friends-to-lovers) fanfic that starts pre-outbreak. Series is now complete and spans from Spring, 2000, through Fall, 2029, in the HBO timeline. My thoughts: It's hard to pick a favorite fic. I have read a little over 500 fics since April of this year. But this one has stuck with me so hard. I keep coming back to it over and over. It is beautifully written, heart wrenching, absolutely wonderful. The no outbreak AU will heal you from the trauma of reading the original version, but listen... it's worth it. The characters, the plot, the imagery, everything is so incredible. If you haven't read this... what are you doing?

A beloved fanfic with my comfort character

Celestial Navigation by @write-and-buried Description: dumped and drowning in a summer storm, you duck inside a coffee shop to hide from your broken heart. Covered in plants and hand drawn images over exposed brick, it seems like a slice of heaven. The owner brings you a blueberry muffin and a promise; you'll fall in love with him before the new year. My thoughts: Dieter is my comfort character, 100%. I love him with all my heart. This fic... It takes everything I love about the character of Dieter, puts him into an eccentric millionaire coffee shop AU, mixes in a little bit of that supernatural witchy vibe I love... and it stole my heart. I read this very very early on in my PPCU days and I have since read it 3 times. And I really don't do rereads often. This fic is absolutely beautiful. It's my fucking Roman Empire, man. I think about it at least daily.

A fanfic I wish more people knew about

Psychomanteum by @whatsnewalycat Description: You've recently taken on the customer-facing responsibilities of the small-scale cannabis bakery you and your late husband ran out of your apartment, which introduces you to occasional customer, Dieter Bravo. A friendship is sparked when you realize you have something in common: you've both died. What Dieter doesn't tell you about his near-death experience, though, is that it foretold his life with you. My thoughts: This is one of those fics you think would have 1000 notes and then you look and it has less than 200 on each chapter. This fic is criminally underrated. Psychomanteum is one of the main reasons I even started writing fanfic. I hadn't considered how deeply moving and beautiful a fic could be until I read this. I think I was originally drawn in by the spooky vibes and I was hooked immediately by the world building, the characters, the exploration of grief and trauma. I cannot sing this fic or aly's praises enough. Everyone should read this.

A fanfic with my favourite trope/AU

Be-All and Endor by @djarins-cyare Description: Languishing in a dull and lonely existence on the forest moon of Endor after travelling there to help salvage Death Star wreckage, a nearly fatal encounter with a mysterious bounty hunter out in the forest heralds an opportunity to utilise long-forgotten skills and develop something more profound than you ever thought possible. My thoughts: So my favorite trope is slow burn. This is... an exceptional slow burn. The tension is there pretty much right from the beginning, but it's like 25 whole chapters before the smut happens I think? Don't quote me on that but it's like nearly halfway in to a fic that is very, very long. On to why this is my favorite slowburn ever: The worldbuilding is beautiful. The characterization of Din is one of the best I've literally ever seen. Reader is incredible. Every choice made by the author is so smart and well-researched and planned out. The plot is fantastic, the characters are amazing, the imagery, the tension, the character development. If you love Din, you have to read this. It is beautiful.

A fanfic with my favourite trope/AU Part 2

I simply can't resist a M/M/F sex pollen fic

Of Gorgons and Gardens by @concussed-to-pieces

Description: a Death Watch-raised Mando that takes the Creed incredibly seriously and an Ezra that's well armed -- sex pollen in the form of a weird plant

My thoughts: I am a SLUT for sex pollen fics, so obviously that was excellent. I also love how it was like "oh the plant makes men want to fuck women" but hinted that neither of them would be particularly upset about fucking each other either. This fic is almost absurdly smutty (but also kinda sweet) in part one, and then part two was so sweet. Like yeah yeah horrible harrowing near death experience yada yada... the STUBBLE SCENE??? The PAIN KINK?? the TOUCHING?? I just about died. And then in part three we get my top all time kink PLUS Din and Ezra and Reader just being so sweet it hurts a little. I am feral for these boys UGH. If you like MMF, read all three parts. If you just like poor pining Din and some insane sex pollen that's a little more MFM than MMF, just read part one. Either way... this fic is insanely good man.

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I could and have recced so many fics. It was very difficult for me for to choose just these five, when the spreadsheet is well over 500 fics now. Check out my Fic Rec Masterlist for a comprehensive list of my recommendations.

#pedrostorieshallowreads23 #fic recs

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prolix-yuy · 6 months

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PedroStories HallowReads Celebration

A Spooky Salute to Writers!

There are literally hundreds of fics out here that have stolen my heart, but here are a few of my favorites. Forgive me if I wax poetic about some of these, but I think you'll love them just as much!

For other stories I've loved, check out my fic rec tag!

🎃 Here are my recommendations for @pedrostories’ HallowReads Celebration 🎃

My favourite fanfics I read this year

Point A to Point B by @amywritesthings Description: Escorting a former Empire prisoner of war to a Rebel Alliance safe zone? It should be a piece of cake. Absolutely no problems whatsoever. My thoughts: My space sister even when she's off in another galaxy far far away (aka another fandom), Point A to Point B was one of the first Din series I read that was in progress at the time I started. Nothing made me quite as excited as giving my blow-by-blow reactions to Amy's spectacular story, and I'll come back to a few of those...ahem...firsts time and time again. The writing style is crisp and gorgeously detailed, and I love her religious Din so very much.

Lie to Me by @iamskyereads Description: A recent transfer to the DEA from the FBI makes you a target of hazing from your co-workers. Choosing to forget your bad first day at a bar puts you on a path towards meeting a new acquaintance. An expert on deception and psychological profiling, you are adept at catching liars. What happens when an increasingly stressful work environment begins to test the limits of your personal life and the one man at the center of it all, Javier Peña? Afterall, everybody lies about something. But how many are you keeping from yourself? An AU of Season 3 of Narcos My thoughts: Skye writes some of my favorite "it's canon now" stories, and Lie to Me is a shining example of what her creative mind can do with Season 3 plus an incredible reader character. I have never read a story where the reader was so different than me but also someone I'd so badly like to be that I could really imagine it to be true. Plus her Javi is so thoroughly rendered in perfect introspection I half expect scenes from the show to have Carino in the background. A must read!

Surrender by @ezrasbirdie Description: Weeks after the events in Kansas City, Joel and Ellie stumble across a woman lost in the Nebraska wilderness. With her knack for foraging and unending patience for Ellie's ceaseless questions, Daisy quickly becomes an asset on their journey. But between Joel's capriciousness towards her presence and Ellie's fierce loyalty to her guardian, she can't help but question her place with her new companions--especially when she catches Joel's gaze lingering more and more when he thinks she isn't looking. My thoughts: Listen, I know there's a lot of Joel out there right now, but this Joel? You need to read this Joel. A glorious character study of an intensely broken man finding a new start through the eyes of a complex and powerfully realized OC. There are whole chapters that have me in a chokehold, and the pain is so stunningly offset by the beauty they find in each other. One of my favorite things Birdie has written (and there are lots to choose from!)

Celestial Navigation by @write-and-buried Description: Dumped and drowning in a summer storm, you duck inside a coffee shop to hide from your broken heart. Covered in plants and hand drawn images over exposed brick, it seems like a slice of heaven. The owner brings you a blueberry muffin and a promise; you’ll fall in love with him before the new year. My thoughts: How can I not mention the story I salivated over every week waiting for a new chapter? This Dieter has all of the hallmarks of canon Dieter with so much more depth and a unique twist to his character that works perfectly in this sort-of AU. Every description is lush and ripe, sensuality used to lull you into horny heaven. Gorgeously realized and a wonderful contained read again and again.

Intimidation Tactics by @whataperfectwasteoftime Description: You and your partner, Marcus Pike, are investigating a case that brings you far too close to something much more dangerous than your average art thief. My thoughts: Penny came out of the gate SWINGING with this series. Marcus and Dave's chemistry is electric, and the three of them together weave attraction and devotion into something much more grounded and confident than I expected. Their relationship blossoms so fully I can't imagine it any other way.

Wild Abandon by @starlightmornings Description: Post-WWII, set in the Great Smoky Mountains of Western North Carolina. Ezra Joe Collins came home from the war looking to hide away in the wilderness. His simple, quiet life is turned upside down when you show up in his garden, hungry and desperate, with nowhere else to go. What starts out as a grudging friendship quickly transforms into something that will knit your very souls together — but as you soon discover, such a bond comes at great cost. My thoughts: Kaylie's masterful execution of this thematic story kept me on the edge of my seat for weeks! The setting and voice is some of the most unique writing I've come across, and the threads she weaves together to make the full picture come to light had me gasping. Plus Ezra is the perfect balance of hedonistic and mysterious, just the way I like him.

Beloved fanfics with my comfort characters

First Class to Tatooine by @mandosmistress Description: You’re a flight attendant who’s so entranced by your melancholy, beskar-clad passenger that you decide to cheer him up with some first class treatment. And although the Mandalorian seems to think he can forget his woes between your legs if he tries hard enough, despair and violence seem to follow him no matter how hard he tries to shake them. My thoughts: Mari's fic was some of the first I read in the fandom and if I'm ever missing Din I come back to this story. Her young Din fics are transcendent, but I'm so in love with this post-TBOBF story and the angst she pulls out of it.

Kinktober 2022 by @chaoticgeminate Description: You’re a fanfiction writer turned novelist, which was great since it was the path you wanted your writing to take you down in life. What you never thought would happen was meeting the Javier Gutierrez, who you actively write smutty fanfiction about from his film with Nic Cage, and you especially didn’t expect him to have a crush on you. Fast forward several months of dating, with a good chunk of your relationship being distance due to his constant traveling and having to go home to Mallorca, when he surprises you with a prompt list and a vacation planned around exploring it. You haven’t even worked up the nerve to tell him about what you write and post to Tumblr about him as a character yet. My thoughts: Who doesn't want to live in a world where some happy accidents bring you together with Javi Gutierrez in a sexy funfest full of feelings, healthy relationship conversations, and mind-blowing smut? Plus Kelly made me almost cry several times featuring my beloved Murch in her stories and now our RCs are best friends forever.

Palomino by @fuckyeahdindjarin Description: Unable to get a refund for a week-long horse-riding pack trip you’d booked with your ex, you decide to go solo. As it turns out, a rebound with a cowboy named Jack while traversing the wild landscapes of Wyoming might just be what you need. My thoughts: Palomino is a triumph of a fic by the incredibly talented Cee that is a must-read if you like anything horsey. Even if you don't, come for the soft-spoken cowboy we were robbed of in TGC and their adventures together. Cee took so many unique turns that had me intrigued with my heart clenching at each new chapter, and the ending is truly something beautiful.

Fanfics I wish more people knew about

Calculated Risks by @pedrito-friskito Description: I took a calculated risk, but fuck, am I bad at math aka - this started as friends with benefits but you’re ridiculously good in bed and not as much of an asshole as originally thought and now I’m kind of in love with you? a saga. My thoughts: Kay's Dieter is a chaotic mess in the best way, and she pairs him with someone just as messy and perfect for him. They traverse some highs and lows together, but the love is so carefully threaded through you have to root for them.

Vibes by @mandoblowmybackout Description: Sex toys, Din Djarin, neurodivergent reader and so many feelings? What's not to love? My thoughts: The number of times I've closed my eyes and thought of scenes from this series is too large to count. As sexy as the concept sounds, the trust and care that Ash takes to give these two the love they deserve is even more exhilarating.

Kitten by @boliv-jenta Description: The reader meets Nico at a swingers party. Will he just scratch an itch or carve a place in her life? My thoughts: Liv has so many fics I adore, but the exploration of Nico as a character and how his and Kitten's experimentation grows is just masterful. Plus she gives us one of my favorite OC side characters and so many twists and turns I was gobbling up each addition the moment they came out!

Fanfics with my favourite trope/AU

Love Triangles by @littlemisspascal Description: Soulmates with Identifying Marks AU, including a ridiculous amount of pining, misunderstandings, and Dieter being Dieter. My thoughts: Rae's writing never fails to make me feel the widest spectrum of emotions. This AU is so fun and thoughtfully fleshed out, with a wild but kind Dieter, hilarious nicknames, and a soulmate twist that had me a gooey mess by the end.

Stranger At My Gate by @leslie-lyman Description: A time-traveling Pero. A modern woman trying her best. A kitchen full of possibility. A helping of Midwestern kindness. A dash of magic. And a whole lot of Christmas spirit. My thoughts: I read this around the holidays and it was the perfect treat for my time-travel-Pero-loving heart! The world Leslie creates is so warm and homey I want to live in it always. Plus big gruff Pero melting down for Tessa makes me want to cry, it's so wonderful.

A Galaxy Far Far Away by @grogusmum Description: This fic is as much a story about Din, Grogu, and Reader as it is a little love letter to an old home of mine, during an idyllic time in my life. As with most authors, there are characters who are a reflection of them, and that is certainly so for reader characters in fics. And it is so here, but only a little, but the cottage, the town, the festivities are directly from life. I hope they come across kind of like characters in their own right. My thoughts: Every time I get a new piece of this story it melts me again. The love in this is quiet and gentle, and Grogu is a sweet little menace we adore. The slow growth of love is truly the star, and I'll forever want to live in this town with a big teddy bear of a man and his mischievous son.

The Language of Flowers by @lowlights Description: You’re the only daughter of a wealthy Victorian family living in the countryside. The head gardener, Din, catches your eye and your heart. A series of clandestine rendezvous put both of your futures in jeopardy. One question persists: could you ever truly be together? (A Din Djarin AU) My thoughts: Gardener!Din owns my heart, my nethers, a large piece of my brain. The Victorian vibes are off the CHARTS, and while there's the looming doom of their secret relationship always present, I still fall back in love every time.

Fanfics I NEED to read

A Girl Walks Into a Bookshop by @oonajaeadira Description: Set a couple of years after the events of the film. Ezra owns a bookshop. You walk in. My thoughts: This has been on my TBR forever and I feel like I need to set aside a day to just binge it. I know it'll make me soft. I know it'll give me all the feels. I just need to prepare myself for it, preferably with a warm drink and a cozy corner to melt in.

Meant to Be by @radiowallet Description: Oberyn Martell has spent his life as a second-born prince enjoying all the pleasures that Dorne has to offer, staving off any notion of an arranged marriage under the guise of searching for his soulmate. But after defeating The Mountain and avenging his sister's untimely death, Oberyn returns home to his brother still without a true heir. And so Doran states his plan: To name Oberyn Lord of Sunspear and have him take a wife, soulmates and lovers be damned. So what happens when the fates of Westeros send him an independent and troublesome woman from the north that just happens to fit the title of both bride and soulmate? Which feelings does one bow to? To bend or to break? And what does it truly mean to be meant? My thoughts: Cat's unique take on a Soulmate AU with an unlikely Pedro boy has been tantalizing me for months! And to hear her say that it's one of the formative stories that's developed her unique voice just makes me want to read it more!

Clean Sheet by @haylzcyon Description: Former FBI agent turned tortured crime-author Marcus Pike has never gotten the hang of complacency. The weight of monotonous days stuck writing a loveless character into predictable plotlines is heavy - but he finds ways to shoulder it. Newly divorced and the owner of a print shop where Marcus orders copies of his working drafts, a slip-up in order packaging sparks a fast blooming friendship between you, and reveals a side to Marcus that you've only dreamt of. My thoughts: AUTHOR MARCUS AUTHOR MARCUS I know this is going to get me yearning and I cannot wait for him to meet-cute his way into my heart.

Like a Moth to the Flame by @the-scandalorian Description: monster!Din, sort of a dark Beauty and the Beast AU My thoughts: Oh god. Oh godddddd. Monster!Din. I can't. I need a minute. I'm gonna be such a problem after this story and I need to be ready for that. I'm looking so disrespectfully at this story Simone.

Thank you to each and every writer who's on this list (plus dozens more) and whose words are forever imprinted in my brain, for better or worse. Happy Spooky Season!

#pedrostorieshallowreads23 #prolix fic recs

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paginate54 · 6 months

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Dave Lewis, LZ chronicler, on Robert's performance of Stairway. From Led Zeppelin Celebration Days FB page:

Some personal thoughts on this performance of Stairway To Heaven...

There was something profoundly moving watching the YouTube footage of Robert Plant performing Stairway To Heaven at the Andy Taylor concert.

This was the first live public airing of the song since the Led Zeppelin 02 Reunion on December 10 2007.

Before I delve in to this subject, Robert’s entire appearance was captivating. Thank you delivered with much emotion, Black Dog hammed up brilliantly and the version of Season of the Witch segueing into a reprise of Black Dog lyrics and Buffalo Springfield’s For What it’s Worth – as in the LA Forum 1970 Blueberry Hill bootleg.

Incidentally, bassist on the night Guy Pratt noted that he has now performed Black Dog with both Robert and Jimmy Page – he was part of the touring band on the Coverdale Page Japan visit in late 1993. The band line up on the night consisted of the aforementioned Guy, former Reef guitarist Kenwyn House (wearing a dragon patterned shirt shades of Jimmy perhaps), Rod Stewart’s drummer David Palmer, Andy Taylor plus Andy Taylor’s son Andy J Taylor on guitar, singer Anne Rani and musician Dino Jelusick on keyboard and backing vocals.

So back to Stairway To Heaven...

We have all had a journey with this song over the years. Mine commenced on April 4 1971 when I heard it on my radio listening to Led Zeppelin’s BBC In Concert performance on Radio One’s John Peel show. I’d heard Jimmy in an interview describing how it had come together in various sections building to a climax. Sure enough this tentative version did just that.

I first saw it performed live on Sunday November 21 1971 at the Empire Pool Wembley – an extraordinary night. It was of course one of the stand out tracks on their just released fourth album.

It went to attain legendary status – the most played record on American radio and from 1975 the rightful finale to every Led Zeppelin live performance.

Like many of their songs the arrangement was often toyed with, not least by the singer who over time added many an ad - lib to the lyrics. As it was performed on every Led Zep show, this enabled the song to retain a freshness.

The first ad-lib I recall was when he inserted the line ''you are the children of the sun'' during the version to be heard on the classic bootleg Going To California from their performance in Berkeley on September 14 1971. From 1973 onwards 'Does anybody remember laughter?‘’ was an expected insert after the line ‘’and the forest will echo with laughter.’’

By 1975, Robert had changed the line ‘’your stairway’’ to ‘’our stairway’’ adding the line ‘’that’s all we got.’’ As I witnessed in awe from the side of the stage during their 1980 Over Europe performances , Robert added ‘’I keep chopin’ and changin'’’ as they led into the climax.

Post Zep, Robert has sang Stairway To Heaven’’ it a mere four times – at Live Aid in 1985, the Atlantic 40th anniversary show in 1988, a sweet truncated version with Jimmy Page in a TV studio in Japan in 1994 and at the Led Zeppelin O2 tribute concert for Ahmet Ertegun where he proclaimed after the song ‘’Ahmet we did it!’’

Well now he has done it again….

The obvious question is why now and why on this occasion?

There’s no doubt it was a special occasion being a concert staged by the ex - Duran Duran guitarist Andy Taylor. Andy has had serious cancer health issues and staged this concert in aid of Cancer Awareness Trust.

As well as performing on the night, Robert donated his personal gold disc of Led Zeppelin IV for the auction –as he put it ''our not so difficult fourth album.'' A part of this was featured on the video stream and it had clocked an initial £50,000 bid.“I love this music and I still love it now very much although I get a bit coy and shy when I have to go near it because it was such a long time ago,” he said.

In an interview with Led Zep News guitarist Kenwyn House revealed that Robert Plant chose to perform Stairway To Heaven after a wealthy donor agreed to donate a six-figure sum to charity if he did so.

So, a special occasion deems a special song for a very worthy cause.

It says everything for Robert’s ease with the Zep legacy, that he could perform this once millstone around his neck with such dignity.

As we know Stairway To Heaven became much maligned and a victim of much parody – and let’s not mention that farcical version by a disgraced not so all round entertainer.

Although he was quick to decry it in the immediate post Zep years, I happen to think Robert is rightly proud of the song, as he is the whole Zep legacy.

Who can forget his tearful reaction to the Wilson sisters and Jason’s performance at the Kennedy Honours in 2012?

So, with none of the pressure of performing it on a big stage and at a pressurised Zep related occasion, he was able to slot it in at this charity event with little fuss.

It worked majestically….

With an ad- hoc line up with few rehearsals, the arrangement was always going to be more loose than tight. That mattered little, as his vocal phrasing was absolutely spot on and what a joy it was to hear him sing this song with a calm control. Some subtle backing vocals aided the tranquil mood.

Here’s the thing – Robert Plant sang it as though he really meant it – confident in his skin at revisiting a major part of his past. Looking good with the mic off held in that familiar pose we know so well.

I wonder what was going through his mind? I know for me it prompted so many precious memories.

There were no ad-libs this time in what was out a fairly straight rendering – the guitar solo was neat and compact and they were back in for the grand finale. Here, Robert slowed things down and the key with it avoiding any strained vocals and he even sang the last section ‘’To be a rock and not to roll’’ for a second time – making it a unique arrangement. He did retain the ''our Stairway'' sentiment.

It was also unique for being the only time he has performed Stairway To Heaven without Jimmy Page...

The final ‘’and she’s buying’’ line was delivered with a delicate finesse – watching it prompted some instant flashbacks.

Momentarily I was back at Earls Court as the mirrorballs spun above them, back in that field just outside Stevenage when they came back to reclaim their crown (''so many people who've helped us over the years - no more people more important than yourselves who who came here on a blind date -this is for you all of yer'') and at home in 1985 watching the TV as the camera panned out to 90,00 watching them re group in Philadelphia for Live Aid.

I also thought about all the much missed friends and Zep comrades who are no longer around to enjoy this special moment...

All that was enough to prompt a huge lump in my throat and a tear in my eye.

Then Robert really sealed it.

Firstly he dedicated the performance to Andy:

“I know that in this contemporary age of digital stuff there’s every likelihood that other people will see that,” he said, facing Taylor. “So if they do, I offer it up to you and your success and to the whole deal that has happened here today and the future of it all.

And also so it’s not just that, I offer it up to Led Zeppelin, wherever they are”

Andy Taylor replied ‘’God bless ‘em there’s a lot of drummers in the sky we love.’’

Let's ponder on that statement...

''I offer this up to Led Zeppelin wherever they are''

It felt like he was giving the song back to his former bandmates and back to his audience – To the privileged few who were lucky enough to witness this special occasion and beyond that to countless fans like me and you.

Deep in the heart of the Cotswold's on an October Saturday evening Robert reclaimed a major part of his history and ours.

It’s likely he may never ever sing Stairway To Heaven this song again and if he doesn’t, it’s had a suitably poignant send off.

There was none of the pressure of the previous post Led Zep performances. It happened for a great cause and for a great fellow Midlands based musician.

I am aiming to be up in the Midlands in a few days’ time for the Saving Grace featuring Suzi Dian gig at the Birmingham Symphony Hall.

I am eagerly looking forward to it, not least after witnessing the YouTube video of this Andy Taylor tribute. For at 75 he is singing so brilliantly and his enjoyment as to where he is at in these advancing years is both inspiring and infectious.

Knowing that Robert Plant is at one with Led Zeppelin’s most famous song makes it all just a little bit more comforting.

As the song states ‘’If you listen very hard the tune will come to you at last’’

I’m still listening to Robert Plant intensely – as are countless others…

Dave Lewis - October 27 2023

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#Stairway to Heaven 2023 #Robert Plant Stairway to Heaven #Led Zeppelin #I've changed my opinion a bit but still seems some personal connection may have ended #Youtube

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