#bilbo is my top favorite character of all of everything i love him
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20 Questions for Fic Writers
Oh this looks like so much fun! Thank you for tagging me @middleearthpixie.
1. How many works do you have on Ao3? 54 😵
2. What’s your total Ao3 word count? 437,811
3. What fandoms do you write for? Mostly Hobbit, but I have written for Tintin, and a tiny bit of What We Do in the Shadows and Sherlock
4. What are your top five fics by kudos?
A Future Bright as Snow- 1,812
Guardian of Kings- 1,368
A Smile for a Cold Spoon- 483
Thirty Minutes to Change Your Life- 466
The Marali Festival- 439
5. Do you respond to comments? Yes! It does take me a little while, but I try to answer each and every one. 😊
6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? Oh goodeness, I don't do angsty endings at all. 😂 I've got a few planned that will have some bittersweet endings. But I'm going to say Home was the angstiest ending, and it's mostly just Thorin comforting Dis as she allows herself to cry.
7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Almost every fic of mine has a happy ending. I don't know that there is one I can qualify as having the "happiest" ending, but One More Little Adventure and Every Wedding Has a Few Disasters are the two that first come to mind.
8. Do you get hate on fics? I have never actually gotten hate on a fic. (knocks on wood)
9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? I do write smut, but I don't know how to describe it other than smut with humor. 😂 I've done a little bit of everything when it comes to smut, and here are a few examples:
Breaking the Rules (Haddotin)
Living the Hobbit Way (Bagginshield)
An Ill-Timed Giggle (Bagginshield)
Webcam (Bagginshield)
10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written? I've not really written any crossovers yet, but I have one in the planning stage which would be a Hobbit/Dungeon Meshi crossover. I don't think it's all that crazy though. 🤣
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? Not to my knowledge.
12. Have you ever had a fic translated? Not to my knowledge.
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? I HAVE! I actually love getting to collab with other authors, and am very thankful for the Hobbit: An Unexpected Collaboration event for getting the chance to do so.
They Stole My Heart (Along With the Rest of Him) with @lordoftherazzles
What Happened in 30C and Secrets in the Blue Mountain Apartment with @thotinshield
14. What’s your all time favorite ship? Definitely Bagginshield 😉
15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? I haven't quite labeled it as abandoned because ideally I'd like to get back to it, but it would be really special circumstances and that's Once Upon a Dream.
16. What are your writing strengths? I feel like characterization and humor are things I excel at and definitely have had people comment on it before.
17. What are your writing weaknesses? Transitions and just adding enough prose. I tend to talk through dialogue and I feel like my stories miss that extra little 'ah!' that would make them special.
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? I mean, I add Khuzdul or Sindarin when I want to enhance that aspect of the character's culture and understanding, but other than that I don't really mess with other languages.
19. First fandom you wrote for? LOL calling me out, but for Mario Bros I wrote A LOT of Daisy/Luigi.
20. Favourite fic you’ve written? AHH! Asking me to choose my best child here. 😭 Okay, I'm going to list out my top 5 favorites:
Home (my first gen Hobbit fic)
Guardian of Kings (my first finished multi-chapter fic; so proud!)
A Lesson Carved in Stone (I really loved playing with Fili's POV)
The Different Shades of Bilbo's Love (the SYMBOLISM I USED!!)
Ambassador to Madness (even though its a WIP)
Tagging: @lucigoo @conkers-thecosy @domesticgoddesswriter @fantasyinallforms @lordoftherazzles and @thotinshield and of course if I missed you, please do it and tag me so I can see your answers! 😍
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For the ask game: Bard of Dale! 🤠
thank you for the ask! I'm sorry it took me a few days to get to it, but without further ado and with regard to Bard:
favorite thing about them -- everything? Obviously there's his A+ parenting, but I think my favorite thing about him is how scrappy and resilient he is! Any time an obstacle appears in front of him, he finds a way around it. Guards who are going to check your dwarf-filled barrels? No problem, just pour fish in on top of the dwarves to hide them. Spies watching your house? That's easy, sneak the dwarves in through the toilet. Dragon about to kill you and your longbow's broken? Just DIY a bow using the broken pieces and your son. Nothing keeps him down and I love it.
least favorite thing about them -- if we're going by the movies (and although I've read the book a multitude of times, I definitely go by the movies), the fact that he keeps giving Alfrid the benefit of the doubt or any responsibility at all. I know it's probably supposed to illustrate that he's a good guy and not vindictive and will therefore be a good king, but come on. Nobody would judge him for indulging in a little payback.
favorite line -- "Bain, look at me. You look at me." /cue hideous sobbing/
brOTP -- Bilbo, interestingly enough. I've written them as brothers a few times and it really appeals to me!
OTP -- barduil, of course. *the chorus of white flag by dido plays faintly in the background*
nOTP -- Bard doesn't really get shipped with a lot of people, but I'm certain someone, somewhere, has shipped Bard/Alfrid. No thank you.
random headcanon -- as teenagers, Bard and his friends would portage rafts up the Forest River and run the rapids for fun. Bard holds the record for starting point that's furthest upstream. When he was 19, he launched his raft from just below the Elven Gate.
unpopular opinion -- I call Bard's kids the Bardlets, not the Bardlings. And if I'm writing an AU, he's almost always divorced, not widowed.
song i associate with them -- if we were vampires by Chester See. Warning about this one: Associating this one with Bard (and Barduil) often makes people angry with me. One of my friends messaged me "I hate you" after they listened to it. On a happier note, there's all the doubt in town by eleventyseven.
favorite picture of them -- this is testing my image harvesting skills, but:
the "I know her as well as any man in this town" face.
And this:
send me a character
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Ten Characters, Ten Fandoms, Ten Tags
Thanks for tagging @chrisoels ! At first I thought I don't have that many fandoms but then I found out that I actually have way too many😅 (why do I always have to overthink stuff like this?) So as there's no clear rules given here - I split it into the list of 10 characters and the list of 10 fandoms because why not:
TEN CHARACTERS - lets start with something normal...
John "Jack" Robinson (from Miss Fisher's Murder Mysteries series) - for making all the most minimalistic reactions feel sooo intense with his voice, his face, his appearence and the way he can blink... He's the coolest quiet guy!❤
Amelie (from Le fabuleux destin d'Amélie Poulain, 2001, dir. Jean-Pierre Jeunet) - nice, quiet girl who is not best at socialising and doesn't enjoy sex (greysexual?) yet loves to make other people happy. Doing good things without being noticed makes her feel powerful and make her feel like Zorro. I love that she eventually gets some kind of reward for all that and the kissing scene in the end is sooo very sweet❤
Pollyanna (from Pollyanna, 1913 novel written by Eleanor H. Porter) [books counts too I guess?] - for looking at the positive side of every situation, what's more to say? Best way to live your life when you're too empathetic👍
Benton Fraser (from Due South series) - a guy from other realm: elegant, polite and humble, obeying all the rules and still be the smartest and most effective police officer around. Not to mention how handsome and cute he is! (take it for ace version of "hot") and scenes like when he falls into the snow in end credits I could watch forever❤ (so bad his asexual smart-ass potential has been wasted by producers in every next season...)
Young Bilbo Baggins (from The Hobbit, or There and Back Again written by J.R.R. Tolkien) - the book character once more: the guy, who starts up as the classical loser, the smallest in the group, knowing nothing, understanding nothing and being scared of his own shadow - when given a chance proves his potential for the greatest deeds, smartest solving problems and bravest of actions💪And the talking to the dragon on the top of that, OMG!!!🤯 (sorry, but Peter Jackson version packed with CGI and unnecessary stuff for me was emotionally flat as a pancake😩)
Zorro (from Zorro, 1957 Walt Disney series) - ZORRO!!! if that's not self-explanatory I don't know what to say😂
Z (from Ant Z , 1998dir. Eric Darnell and Tim Johnson) - for: "Why does everybody have to dance the same way?"
Sherlock Holmes (from Sherlock BBC series) and Gregory House (from House M.D. series) - well it is technically the same character (like Doctor Who or like James Bond - played by multiple actors): brilliant antisocial detective no matter if he is played by Benedict Cumberbatch or Hugh Laurie. And if not for his stunning personality (you may love him, you may hate him but you can't stay indifferent) - all the undefined interactions, dialogs and puns between Sherlock and John or between Greg House and Lisa Cuddy are just pure gold❤️🔥
Howard Brackett (from In & Out, 1997 dir. Frank Oz) - sooo sweet, I consider him my favorite ace movie character💜💚 (the 1990's movie tells him to be "gay" but I'd say it's an obvious misrecognition and I'd need another post to tell more about that guy...😋)
Jareth the Goblin King (from Labyrinth 1986, dir. Jim Henson) - well... that's another guy that I sooo much need another post to talk about😆 Starred by David Bowie, nuff said😎
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TEN FANDOMS (don't worry, this part is much shorter):
Labyrinth (1986, dir. Jim Henson) and its fancomic Girls Next Door (I love that in the fancomic Jareth gets muuuch more good time teasing and flirting Sarah!😋) - what to say? Everything is magical and fancy here but never too naive
X-men - a talent that makes you special also makes you an outcast (which is not any different from the real world actually...) Also cool looking action scenes and young Hugh Jackman as the Wolverine.
Collateral (2004, dir. Michael Mann) - I watched it for the first time in 2021 and it became my biggest obsession, hyperfixation and life perspective changing experience❤️🔥 (again - most definitely some other post to talk about it) But apart from my madness it's also is just a very good action movie with nice soundtrack. And ppl saying they hate Tom Cruise but loved Collateral says a lot about it!👍
Terminator 2: The Judgement Day. It's like Zorro to me - obssesed since my childhood and never get over it
Fiddler on The Roof - pure perfection
M.A.S.H. series - classic
House M.D. - apart from everything else it was also a great help during medical studies - nice thing when you can memorise weird disease symptoms with an episode😉
Toy Story - fascinating thing to watch every next movie growing up with you - from your childhood problems to middle age issues...
Matrix - hyperfixation of 13 years old me (but the first movie I choose to treat as a whole story)
Garfield - 😁
Oh, that was kind of refreshing. Turns out I actually needed that.
Now I'm afraid I do not know enough people to tag but lets try it: @the-malfunctioning-somnambulist , @vampiiriic , @blackhoodedfigur , @lireb-librarian , @voidofsky , @sharp-lines-in-charcoal , @dragodina , @sbmranger , @tamisdava2 , @notasapleasure
Have fun if you feel like it or just have a good day anyway!❤
#tag game#10 characters#10 fandoms#did not choose და ჩვენ ვიცეკვეთ fandom because it's way too obvious on my blog already#and I was also not able to choose only one character between მერაბი and ირაკლი#one silent guy with emotions shouted out with only his facial expression and body language in such a stylish manner as if he was a cat#other looking like a purebred dog behaving like playfull puppy full of love but obedient even if it makes himself suffer more than anything#it could only be them both or none so I choose none
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The Hobbit
It does not do to leave a live dragon out of your calculations, if you live near him.
I first read The Hobbit in sixth grade. It had long been one of my mother's favorites, and the fact she delayed so long in giving it to me to read was almost certainly so I could appreciate it fully the first time I read it.
I read The Lord of the Rings the next year, largely because one of my teachers said it was too difficult for a child my age, and fell rather more in love with it - and the movies which came out a few years after that - but The Hobbit always had a special place in my heart because it was my mother's favorite. Words like second breakfast and elevenses peppered our conversations long before I knew their source.
I read the book again about a decade later, shortly before the first movie came out - it is a rare book I read more than once every 5-10 years, even my favorites - but was so disgusted by the movie that I never saw the second two despite the love I have for the source. Indeed, for many years the movies and the inexplicable love the internet seems to have for them turned me off everything but solitary rewatches of The Lord of the Rings extended edition and its extras.
Over the past few weeks, however, I've felt the deep desire to reenter Middle-Earth and, somewhat against my better judgement, decided to start at the beginning: The Hobbit. (Actually, once I decided this I put it off for almost a week because The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey really did traumatize me and my love for the source material that much.)
But The Hobbit remains a good little book. I can easily see why I enjoyed it so much when I first read it as a child. It remains enjoyable as an adult, though I do have to pinch myself from time to time and say this is a children's book.
My biggest complaint is actually that we have 13 dwarves... and are given very little detail about them. They are interchangeable save for the brief mention of cloak and beard colors at their introduction. None of the lineage stuff that comes to be so important later, or indeed any hint of how any of them are connected to each other until page 150 of my HarperCollins edition. Hell, I'm not certain half the dwarves have speaking lines. (I can understand why Peter Jackson did what he did with the dwarves in his movies, to make them unique and memorable, but there's little-to-no basis for any of it and frak if it isn't so over the top it's in fraking orbit.)
Also: the complete lack of female characters, other than a passing mention of Bilbo's mother.
Otherwise... that's all I really have. It's a good little book and a nice little adventure, but I prefer the meat LotR gives us. I remain baffled how anyone managed to eek 3 movies out of it, but I love it and now must lie in wait for the little ones in my own family to be old enough to appreciate it. Maybe then I'll recapture some of the delight I had at my initial reading. Until then, I'll just have to remind myself I may one day be old enough to truly enjoy fairytales again.
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Behind the Scenes of Fic Writing asks: 1 and 14 :)
1. What was the first fandom and/or pairing that you wrote fic for?
When I was four I was acting out Everyone Lives AU fanfic for Black Beauty with my toy horses. (GINGER DESERVED BETTER!!!) When I could actually draw and write I made a lot of stories, mainly for Black Beauty and Land Before Time and various Disney Princesses, but also stuff for my own toys who all had names, personalities, and extensive backstories.
14. If you were stuck on a desert island with only two characters, which would you pick?
Bilbo Baggins for sure. Din Djarin can come too. Bilbo will hatch a plan to get us off and Din can execute it. And even if it doesn’t work, the company will be delightful.
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What's your opinion on why crossovers between Twilight and Harry Potter are so popular? I understand they're both popular series that were popular around the same time but it seems kind of... prevalent? Like it feels like every 10th work under the Twilight tag is a Harry Potter crossover. I might be reading too much into it but it also feels like there's some big secret I'm missing.
Harry Potter is the Multi-Fandom Bicycle
Well, that's just it, both are major fandoms that were very popular within the same timeframe that have very little barrier to entry.
Harry Potter is pretty much the most popular crossover with anything. Look at any other, especially if it's a major, fandom, I guarantee you Harry Potter will be in the top N crossover fandoms.
Naruto, Inuyasha, MCU, The Lord of the Rings, Star Wars, the recent Star Trek films, etc.
Twilight is no exception to that.
And it doesn't matter if it really doesn't make much sense or bends the rules of either world too much, because that's not why people write crossovers.
People write crossovers because they love both universes so much that they ask themselves the question, "What if these worlds collided? What if my favorite characters met? What if my favorite characters formed a relationship?" and boom the crossover is born.
Harry Potter and Isekai
I actually won't say Harry Potter characters are all that well suited to being thrown into another universe. Sometimes, the other universe doesn't suit them or their magic abilities, they have no place in the story.
However, people are generally convinced that they're great characters to throw into other worlds (usually I see Hermione or Harry for this).
And to be fair, depending on the story, there's a lot of adventures that can happen.
Harry can help friends fight Thanos, Harry can free Loki from Thanos' oppression, Harry can help Luke, Harry can bang Obi-Wan and make Anakin not turn to the dark side, Harry can become a ninja, or Harry can shove Bella Swan out a window so he can bat his eyes at Cedric instead.
I'm not always a fan (not usually, actually) but there's a lot of plot points that seem exciting and writers would see Twilight as no exception.
Harry's this not quite human who has never graced the world of Twilight before. He has cool magic abilities that makes Edward, Emmett, Jasper, pick your love interest du jour interested in him. Somehow these never significantly affect the plot in any way aside making him Cooler Than Bella (TM).
But the mystery of Harry can drive forward the plot and the romance.
The BBC Sherlock and Smaug Effect
I'm not sure if this trope has a name but there's this thing where, if an actor well known and beloved by a fandom plays a certain role then fandom will project that character onto the actor playing a completely different role in a completely different series.
Remember the bizarre influx of Smaug/Bilbo Baggins?
Well, Bilbo Baggins was played by the same actor in the role of BBC Sherlock's John Watson. The voice of Smaug was none other than Sherlock himself.
Given the pervasiveness of Johnlock on the internet, it infested the Hobbit fandom with no mercy.
(Though I haven't looked I am sure Khan/Bilbo Baggins exists for similar reasons.)
Why do I bring this up?
Robert Patterson, the actor who played Edward Cullen in the films, also played the role of Cedric Diggory in Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire.
Boom.
Instant crossover material right there. WHAT IF CEDRIC WAS REALLY EDWARD?! WHAT IF CEDRIC REINCARNATED AS EDWARD?! WHAT IF EDWARD WAS REALLY CEDRIC?!
TL;DR
No big secret, this is just what happens with HP, in the words of the Frank's Red Hot Buffalo Sauce commercials, "I put that shit on everything."
Also helping is the Cedric-Edward connection.
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Okay, I know nobody asked for this, but I’ve decided to list my rankings of my favorite Armitage roles because honestly, a good majority of them run my life in some way:
Sir Guy of Gisborne - THIS KNIGHT! When I first started watching Robin Hood, I honestly didn’t expect to have a favorite character, especially to this level. Not only do I like him because he’s played by Armitage himself, but this character has become one of my favorite characters of all time because he’s just so flawed and real. He’s a bad man who’s done terrible crimes and deserves to pay for them, but yet I can’t feeling sorry for him because he lost his family when he was young, was left with nothing; no support or love, and is only doing these asshole things because he’s trying to gain back everything he lost; his wealth and power. He has that kind, caring side that shows around Marian, but he can also be cruel, cold and ruthless and I love it all honestly. Granted, I don’t like some of the things he does (abandon his child in the forest, force Marian into marriage and killing her), but Guy of Gisborne is such a RAW and REAL character with his anger, guilt, torment, struggle and passion and that’s why he is my #1.
John Thornton - After watching the masterpiece that is the 2004 BBC North and South, this Victorian Gentlemen found his place as #2 on my list, knocking Thorin down for this spot. I mean, what kind of man not only in Victorian Society, but nowadays in modern times, declare that they want to marry a girl strictly because they love who she is as a person, not what assests she can bring to them? JOHN FREAKIN THORNTON. The way he is hopeless in love with Margaret even though he feels he is not worthy of her. The way he openly lets himself feel such emotions. The way he looks at her. The way how even after she rejected him, he defends her honor even if he has the wrong idea about something she’s done. Not to mention that iconic kiss scene. John Thornton is a treasure.
Thorin Oakenshield - This used to be the only role of his I knew of when I first saw The Hobbit movies in 2016. I love his character and how much of a great leader he is trying to reclaim his home for his people. I wouldn’t have called him one of my most favorite characters, but I do like his character for his journey. I loved his friendship with Bilbo and cry every time he dies. In fact, I read The Hobbit book hoping that Thorin would survive in it only to find out his fate was the same. As always with any of his roles, Armitage shined like a gem and helped bring Thorin to life wonderfully.
Lucas North - I honestly haven’t watched a single episode of Spooks, but once I learned Armitage had a role in it, I was intrigued of course. I watched some clips of his character and read about Lucas online. Armitage just plays a Bad Boy so well and Lucas is one of these. I’d almost say he’s similar to Guy, but I still want to try to find episodes online and only watch the ones with his character in it. XD
Harry Kennedy - Again, another one I came across because Armitage plays him. I never heard of The Vicar of Dibley until then. I’m still relatively new to it, but I’ve seen his first episode and some clips online and HARRY KENNEDY IS A CINNAMON ROLL. Nothing more needs to be said.
I have yet to check out his other roles as well. I heard he played John Proctor from The Crucible which is definetly a role that’s always touched with the ladies, especially when Daniel-Day Lewis played him. I never cared for him, but if Richard is playing him, I know I will become one of those girls.
I know he also voices Trevor Belmont in Castlevania which is another role I like, but not one to make my Top list, even if I love his voice so much. <3
He is also going to be voicing Rassilon in the Gallifrey Audios, something I am SUPER excited for. It doesn’t come out till oh gosh, next month...but I know he’s gonna make me love I character I hate so much, so that should be exciting.
However, the fact he played background characters in both Star Wars: The Phantom Menace & Tim Burton’s Alice Through the Looking Glass STILL HAS ME SHOCKED! Let’s not forget Captain America: The First Avenger.
#richard armitage#Jamie rambles about her crush on Richard Armitage#sir guy of gisborne#Thorin Oakenshield#John Thornton#Lucas North#Harry Kennedy
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Sweet Smolder
Summary: A Bilbo reader insert~ you’re human in this. You attempt making your favorite recipe. Short, sweet and cute, at least I think so.
I flipped through the many books on the shelf, eyes scanning the pages for a specific recipe I had grown to love so much. But so far my search went unrewarded, unable to find what I was looking for through the ones I searched.
“Bilbo dear, where is that cookie recipe I love so much?” I asked loud enough for my husband to hear me from wherever he was in the cozy hobbit hole.
“It’s in my personal one where I keep all my notes!” He hollered back. Footsteps padded along the smooth wooden floors as he approached my location. He placed a small gentle hand on my back when he reached me, stretching to grab his notebook from the top shelf, flipping to the right page.
“This one darling.” He eyed me, hesitantly passing it to me. I eagerly took it from him, furrowing my eyebrows in wonder as to why he looked a bit worried.
“Oh yes, thank you! I’ve been dying to have one of these lately.” I told him, hugging the book to my chest. I exited the study, Bilbo following close behind me with that same expression on his face.
“You should have told me! I would have baked them for you.” He said, watching my movements closely as I retrieved some of the ingredients I needed from the wood cupboards.
“I’m a grown woman. I think I can handle a batch of cookies.” I said, placing my hands on my hips. He smiled at me, sparkling blue eyes meeting my own.
“You’re right. Just, please be careful. Last time you used the oven you burned yourself pretty bad.” I nodded, subconsciously rubbing my thumb over the red scar on my wrist that lingered months after the incident.
“I will. No burns this time.” He nodded in agreement, taking my hands in his smaller ones. Bending down, I placed a gentle kiss to his wrinkled forehead. I giggled at his blushing cheeks and wiggling nose, ruffling his scruffy hair on his head with my fingertips.
“I’ll be in the garden if you need me. Some of my vegetables are ready for harvest. Perhaps we can have a nice soup for supper tonight.” He exclaimed, rubbing his stomach at the mention of food.
“Don’t work too hard out there. The sun is awful toasty today.” I warned as he scurried to the door, pulling it open with all his might, letting some humid summer air drift in.
“I won't, dear.” He winked at me before closing the large green door behind him. I sighed to myself, grabbing my apron off the hanger beside Bilbos, tying it securely around my waist. With my sleeves rolled up, I set to work on the dough, determined to make them as delicious as when my husband does.
Once I was finished, and all the dough was evenly spread apart on a baking tray, I leaned over the oven, placing another log into the fire. I opened the oven door and placed the tray on the flat iron surface, quickly shutting it again. With a sigh, I wiped the sweat from my forehead, relieved that the first process was finished. I glanced at the clock, noting the time and when I should return to check on them before heading to the next room to grab a book and wait for them to finish.
Plopping down in a large, plush chair, I opened to the page I left off on and quickly became fully entranced by the story within. My eyes quickly scanned each word, absorbing every clang of a sword, bloodshed by betrayal, and the hero of the story finding his victory over his enemies. Though his triumph came at the cost of his love, all of Middle Earth could rest in peace once more, free from the evils that now laid underneath them, sealed away by the wizards magic forever. A tear was shed as I read on, mourning the love that was lost to evil, though not slain in vain.
I marked my page, seeing I only had a few left but couldn’t find the will to finish at the moment, and closed the cover, placing it on the lamp table beside me. My thoughts wondered as I sat there for a moment, finding myself in awe of how a great novel could bring such tragedy to the characters within, yet sadness to the one possessing a copy.
My thoughts were interrupted then by the front door being pushed open, squeaking slightly at the hinges. I watched as my small hobbit walked in, carrying an overfull basket that was far too large for him. Quickly I strode over to him, seeing that he was struggling beneath the weight of it.
“I’ll take that for you darling.” I said, hoisting the wicker basket up in my arms and carrying it to the table in the kitchen. A sweaty Bilbo followed, immediately retrieving a glass and filling it with water.
“I see you’ve got quite the harvest here.” I commented, looking at all the bright colors of everything he picked. It looked like enough to last us for most of the winter.
“We’ll definitely have a great supper tonight.” He agreed as he wiped the moisture from his forehead with a cloth. I smiled at him, taking his chin in my thumb and forefinger, gently kissing the tip of his nose.
“Why do I smell something burning?” He asked scrunching up his nose from the strong smell. Immediately my heart dropped to my stomach, the overwhelming scent hitting me right then as well. With a sharp gasp, I turned and darted towards the oven, flinging the door open. I choked from the puff of smoke that now filled the small room, covering my face with my blouse to block out the fumes.
“No…” I whispered, reaching into the oven to remove the tray of blackened cookies before they got any worse. Bilbo halted my movements just before I grabbed onto the hot aluminum pan with my bare hands.
“Let me get them.” He said, reaching in with his oven mitts.
“I guess I lost track of time when I was reading. I didn’t think it had been ten minutes yet.” I sighed, letting my shoulders slump.
“Why can I never make anything right?” I asked myself, glaring bitterly at the black cookies that were sitting on the counter top. He hurried over to me, wrapping his short arms around my waist, rubbing his hand up and down my lower back. I leaned down, resting my cheek on his head, enjoying the comfort he offered me.
“It’s ok sweetheart, it happens. I couldn’t tell you how many times I've ruined something I tried making. We can always try again another day if you’re feeling up to baking again.” He suggested, knowing how down I always felt after realizing I couldn’t cook anything, especially when compared to Bilbo's skills.
“Yeah but I was looking forward to those. I always screw things up. I don’t know why I even bothered.” I grumbled, throwing my hands into the air a little too dramatically.
“Tell you what. Why don’t you go finish reading your book, I’ll start dinner and bake another batch of these. We can have them with tea after supper.” I smiled down at the halfling I was so lucky to have. I felt guilty for letting him do something else for me, with all that he already did, and especially after his long afternoon in the garden. But seeing his cute little ears wiggle, and his large eyes staring up at mine, I couldn’t say no. He was always so eager to please everyone around him, but if he could do something to make me happy, he would travel across the world and back to make it happen.
“That sounds like a wonderful idea.” His face lit up at this, knowing he would make me happy in the end.
“But are you sure there’s nothing I can do to at least help? Maybe I could start chopping up som-”
“No! It’s fine, really. I love cooking for you. And besides, I don’t think we want an episode like the last time you used a knife.” He teased, wiggling his finger in front of his face. I grimaced, remembering the time I sliced into my hand with a sharp blade. Ever since then, he rarely let me do anything in the kitchen aside from setting the table. He was right of course, knowing how clumsy I could be.
I nodded, silently agreeing to leave him alone to cook. Leaning down to place a chaste kiss to his lips before leaving the room, happy to have found the time to finish the adventure I longed finish after all.
I reclaimed my place in the large fluffy chair, opening to where I left my bookmark. The gentle scent of broth and searing vegetables soon carried over into the den where I sat, along with a quiet hum from Bilbo. I smiled to myself, waiting to share a nice meal with my husband, content with the life we shared.
#bilbo x reader#bilbo reader insert#bilboreader#bilbo x human#bilbofanfiction#the hobbit#lord of the rings#lotr fanfic
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When Lightning Strikes - Chapter 15
Author Disclaimer:: The Hobbit, Middle Earth and its characters are not mine. I take no credit. The story line and even some dialogue–also not mine. Instead I claim my Original Character Laurel and the adjustments to the story line.
Summary:: From when Laurel Took was small she dreamed of a man. Every time she dreamed of him, he could not see or hear her. Over time they are able to communicate–but he’s been dreaming about her too. Finally after years of anticipation Laurel takes the leap and kisses him. Only for her to wake up and dread the real world. Then lightning strikes and she finds herself in a familiar place, with a familiar face.
Rated:: M for Mature. Please do not read this story unless you are 18+ At this point in the story there isn’t much, but later on the M rating will come into effect.
Warnings:: Language, Violence and Scenes of Sexual Nature. Smutty Chapter Here!
Pairing:: Kili x OC (Laurel)
Laurel
Once we finally got back into the water, Kili couldn't keep his hands off of me. Everything was surreal, like a very lucid dream. Something possessed me to act the last hour. Never in my life had I thought I would be in the woods fooling around with a man; or dwarf in this case. Especially Kili.
It didn't help that when I saw him wet and half naked I immediately clenched my thighs.
Throughout the days I had been here, there were times that I would find myself starring at him. It was just wrong to be that handsome. It should be an act against God to approach me the way he did; dripping wet, light curls on his chest and trailing down to the unknown. Then he hugged me, and I could feel him hot and hard but still soft against my stomach.
Since I didn't have experience dating and I worked and hunted, I read a lot to keep my mind off of my dreams. Through reading I did find what romance should be, how your face should heat and legs tremble at the sight of something truly sexy. I found things I would have never thought possible in the act of sex or fooling around. Not having any friends of my own to gossip with I did a lot of internet reading, and after a few dreams at sixteen of Kili shirtless doing odds and ends; I started touching myself in the mornings.
What transpired just now was nothing like what I normally experienced. I didn't know there was that big finale that made me quiver and scream with ecstasy.
I didn't want to accept a courting braid, I didn't want to define anything between us in fear he did die. The look of hurt that crossed his face had me wanting to do anything to make him feel better.
And to hug me close so I could feel his skin against my own and ignite the fire within me.
Kili and I ended up washing each other, and I had to slap his hands away when the touches turned into burning caresses that wanted to lead to more. When we left the water I tried my hardest not to hide myself when I could feel his leering gaze on my ass. Wrapped in my towel, I sat in the soft grass and waited for Kili to meet me. It was surprising how effortless it was for him to comb his fingers through my hair and twist a braid just under my hairline behind my ear. It was a very intricate braid, but easily hidden beneath all my hair. He used the bead that he had put in it in Rivendell, then placed another braid in the top half of my hair, clasping it with the bead in his own hair.
"There," he murmured pressing a kiss to my shoulder, the act very sincere and loving. "It is there for anyone to see if they shall look. I would have made it bigger, but I did not want uncle to anger. He is coming to terms, so I do not want to push him."
"Do I put one in your hair," I asked, reaching into his dark brown locks and fingering the softness. It was still slick with water.
"No. You just proudly wear that. Do not unbraid it, it would signify that you are revoking the courtship. I should be the only one to remove it, only to re-braid it."
Once we dressed—I had to fight Kili playfully as he tried to undress me—we returned to the house. The company had already eaten, but they saved Kili and I food. We ate together by the rest of the dwarves who were settled into the hay.
"Where were you two off too," Fili asked quirking an eyebrow.
Immediately my face turned red thinking about the sexual acts I had just shared with his brother a while ago. Quickly I buried my face into my chest letting my hair hide me.
Kili cleared his throat, "Taking a walk. Talking."
I chanced a glance at Fili to see he was glaring at his brother with a look of suspicion.
After a while everyone started to settle, resting so that we could rise and leave for Mirkwood in the morning.
We were woke a handful at a time, each gathering our packs and weapons. Outside Beorn had ponies waiting for us. There were not enough for each, so most of us doubled up. One horse waited for Gandalf. Kili and I settled our things onto the pony, jumping onto the animal and preparing for departure.
"If you trot, you should reach Mirkwood by midday," Beorn offered, "at the wood line, please leave my ponies. Follow the elvish path and it should be mostly safe. Beware the elves of the wood, they do not act the same as their foreign kin of Rivendell."
True to Beorn's word, we reached the darker forest by midday. It didn't take long for us to get off our ponies and gear up. Gandalf did not get off his horse at all.
"I have very pressing matters to attend to," he grunted, "I will meet you at the Lonely Mountain. Do not stray from the elvish path. There is a sickness in these woods and you will never leave, seeing things that are not true for the rest of your life. Do not enter that mountain without me Thorin Oakenshield and company."
With the warnings he left at a full gallop, leaving me with unease. The wood was sick? Was it something in the air? None the less I followed the rest, hand on my sword, as we entered the dark forest. It was simple enough, a stone path was made of squares showing which way to go. There wasn't any forks or three ways to worry about. Sometimes we had to halt while the path was cleared because it seemed to have ended.
The day wore on, nighttime starting to come to us. Thorin declared we would travel for as long as it took until we got out of the woods. It was dark and eerie in there so I understood his concern. The trees were gnarled in places and the air was thick. It wasn't unbearable but uncomfortable.
Slowly I started to see the sickness Gandalf spoke of. Not in myself, but the dwarves.
Bofur started to spout nonsense about the firelights sparkling before his eyes. Dori, Nori, and Ori were pushing each other back and forth about getting the last dinner roll. Bilbo was looking around as if he were hearing noises, and stopped before Dwalin, poking him in the chest and squinting deeply.
The leader of the group, Balin at the time, just kept dragging his feet and walking, not stopping to see if we were following them. A terrible feeling pitted itself in my stomach, as if we were being watched. Idly I grabbed for my smaller pocket knife and stuck it in between the bare skin of my bottom and underwear. Something was telling me I needed to hide it.
Suddenly Kili rounded on me, ripping my bow off my shoulders and grabbing me by the thighs to push me up against a tree. Fear didn't fill me as it should have, but confusion.
His lips crashed against my own in recklessness. A hiss left me when he accidentally pinched my lip against my teeth with his own. "Kili," I hissed, "what are you doing? Everyone is in front of us! We are trying to get out of here!"
"Mmm what are you talking about little doe," his voice dripped something fierce. "'Tis our wedding night, I am consummating our marriage."
My heart started to thump wildly against my chest. The sickness took him as well. He was hallucinating. I tried my hardest to push against his chest, beating it for a moment to gain his attention. "No it isn't. We are in Mirkwood, it is the sickness," I hissed trying to get him to see reason.
A gasp left me when his lips started to dance against my throat and neck. I came to find out over the last three or four encounters that my neck and throat were my favorite spots. Soft gasps of appreciation turned to deep moans when his teeth sunk into my skin, harsh and passionate. My back scrapped the harsh bark of the wood as he pushed me up so that he could push himself between my legs. Even through his thick trousers I could feel him hot and hard grinding against me. It was a wonderful friction I craved for, but seeing everyone standing around us had me cringing.
Even if they weren't paying attention, I didn't want to have moments like this in front of them.
"Stop," I beat against his back, "seriously Kili we can't do this right now!"
A growl rumbled against my collarbone where he bit me harshly again, this time pain finding me instead of pleasure. My breast was grasped harshly, another hand ripping at my shirt since I was pinned to the tree. Once my shirt was in pieces below me I started to thrash and beat on him more. Deep down I feared that he wouldn't stop. Not that I didn't want to experience wonderful sensations with him, but my first time would not be in front of the company, and him not in his right mind.
Everything happened at once.
Someone hit Kili in the back of the head, he grunted, dropping me. All around us elves were disarming and pushing other members of the company into small groups and aiming weapons at them. The elf that hit Kili in the back of the head was taller than him by a margin, white blonde hair braided down the side of his head above his pointed ears. Armed with a bow and a sword at his side, he pointed the end of his bow at Kili's throat.
"I do believe she said stop," he hissed at Kili. I was stunned, watching from the ground in just my bra and pants. Hesitantly I grabbed for my dagger, prepared to do something. Another elf smacked my hand with the end of her bow, causing me to drop my weapon.
A quick intake of breath met both of us when our eyes met. If anything I thought I could be looking at my sister, if I had one. Our hair was very similar in color, eyes the same shade of green. Her skin was paler than mine, but our faces sort of resembled. At that moment the elf that disarmed Kili gazed at me as well, his eyes widening. The female elf that smacked me looked at Kili, eyes widening as well, "Kili?"
She knew Kili? Immediately I felt the green eyed monster called jealousy rear its ugly head. Kili was attracted to elves; of course she knew Kili. My mood turned sour instead of scared at the prospect of being captured.
Slowly the gang of elves were searching all the dwarves for weapons. I could see the clarity in their eyes as they realized what was happening, that they were breaking the hold on the sickness that the forest had in the air. "Laurel," Kili's voice broke the air, his head snapping around frantically looking for me. I was already tied up and sitting on the ground.
"Calm down," I muttered, "I'm over here. No harm."
One elf was searching Fili for weapons, and I had to fight my smile as he pulled out sword after sword from a smirking dwarf. By my count twelve were already discovered. It was like a game to him. The elf that hit Kili was tying him up as well, grunting and muttering things about 'filthy dwarves'. Once everyone was tied up, we were being marched through the woods. After a while, familiarity took over.
It looked just the same as it did the first time I met Kili and was able to talk to him. I tried to focus on the problem at hand, though my mind kept traveling to all the things I had seen and heard in the past few hours. One is that Kili thought we were married and was trying to force himself onto me. Two was that the female elf knew him in evidently a personal way. Three was that I knew the brothers had daggers that weren't accounted for in their trousers. Finally I noticed that Bilbo was missing. My gut told me he wasn't gone, but merely using that odd ring to follow in the shadows.
We were led to a fortress, a very beautiful one. The walk was long but we found ourselves in cells and locked up, one or two of us each to a cell. The elf that got Kili off of me regarded me with a look of unease as he tossed a blanket at me before locking me in. Did he feel sorry for me? It was cold in their dungeons, so I wrapped myself up and shivered, thankful for the extra warmth.
Kili was thrown in the cell across from me by the female. I watched intently as he glared at her through the open door she had yet to close. "Nice to see you again Kili," she almost purred, "I better check for weapons."
A sneer found his face as he backed away, "I was already searched by Legolas. Shut the door, leave me be Tauriel."
More soft words were exchanged from Tauriel before she threw me a look over her shoulder, a questioning look. Once all the elves disappeared I slumped against the wall behind me in the small cell.
"She looks an awful lot like me," I muttered loud enough for Kili to hear. "And she is awful friendly with you."
"Nothing happened between us," he responded disdainfully.
Overtime I started to tune out the mutterings from the rest of the company. Kili fell silent after I didn't respond to his questions about my lack of shirt. Eventually my eyes closed and sleep found me.
The clang of metal woke me, my cell door opening. Legolas, as Kili called him, was offering me his hand. Was that sorrow in his eyes? Without taking it I rose, following him as he led me out of the cell and down the various walking paths. Tauriel was leading Thorin ahead of us. Eventually we reached a formal looking area that was surrounded in elves in armor. At the back of the suspended room was a beautiful throne of white wood and antlers. Seated in it another elf of intricate robes, sitting on white blonde hair like Legolas' was a reddish leaf crown, and he looked pissed off.
"Some may imagine that a noble quest is at hand. A quest to reclaim a homeland and slay a dragon. I myself suspect a more prosaic motive; attempted burglary, or something of that ilk. There are starlight gems inside that mountain I would like to reclaim myself," the king's commanding voice echoed across the hall. His eyes flittered to me, causing me to shiver and pulling the blanket around myself more. With a point of his chin, the blanket was ripped from me.
He rose, taking purposeful steps to walk around me and assess, "Now you have a…halfing elf in your presence? Tell me girl, what is your heritage?"
It took me a moment to clear my throat, it was so dry. "My name is Laurel Took," I coughed softly, "Evidently I am equally hobbit and elvish, and human."
"How did you come to the company of dwarves?"
Before I answered I glanced at Thorin, watching as his eyes turned to slits. "We found her at Rivendell," he muttered. I tried to school my surprise at his lie. "Elrond said that they found her without knowledge of where she was. My nephew took a liking to her so we took her with as a personal… chattel. It's very lonely on long travels."
Did Thorin just refer to me as a sex slave?
All the while I kept my mouth shut, trying not to act as surprised as I felt. What was he trying accomplish? Thorin looked dark and smug, while this king looked disgusted and even more pissed off.
"Is this true young one," he took a softer tone, "did they force you to commit acts that you did not want to?" With his words his fingers grazed my neck and shoulder. The touch stung if only for a second.
Kili mauled me.
"The dark haired archer was molesting her when we found them," Legolas offered.
The king glared at Thorin once more, pacing around the room. Finally he settled back into his throne. "Tauriel, take her and clean her up. Feed her and clothe her. Do not worry child, we will care for you from now forward," the king flicked his hand to the side.
I was whisked away promptly. Everything moved so fast as I was pushed into a hot tub of water and scrubbed by other female elves. Confusion coated each of them as they found my pocket knife when it tumbled out of my underwear. I was thankful they gave it back to me. They pushed me into a silver tight dress and attempted to unbraid my hair. I fought hard to keep it the way it was. When they turned I shoved the knife between my breasts. From there I was dragged to something that appeared to be a kitchen. Internally I groaned at the fruits and vegetables that were placed in front of me once more. There was no way in hell I was staying here as an elf and not eating meat. It was time to bust out of this bitch.
Once I finished off with bread Legolas appeared in the kitchen I was in. "Lady Laurel," he bowed softly, "allow me to escort you to your chambers."
I quirked an eyebrow, "I am not tired. I just woke a while ago when you fetched me from the cell I was in. What happened to my things?"
"You won't be needing them. We will care for you as my father said before," he replied.
Father? So I was talking to another prince. Overall he was a handsome elf, but he was no Kili—who seemed to ooze sexiness with even the smallest of smirks.
"Well I may not need all my things, but I need some things from my pack. Personal things," I offered, trying to smile and look appealing to get what I want. He looked at me with a small smile and offered his arm.
"Of course," he stated as he led me away. "They are in the wine cellar. We can go there now."
"Oh I've never had elvish wine before," I replied pretending to be excited. "I was only in Rivendell for a few days when the dwarves took me with them."
Throughout all the mazes I begun to get confused and lost. Hopefully Bilbo was sneaking around somewhere so that our soon to be escape would be more easily done. The way that Legolas peered at me from the corner of his eyes seemed to be that of interest. Interest for what I do not know, but I didn't care for the look either way. "You share a striking resemblance to Tauriel," he mentioned as we started to descend some stairs.
"I've noticed," I muttered. Surprisingly we found ourselves in the dungeons where all the dwarves were sitting and sulking. My eyes looked to find Kili resting against the wall tired and droopy eyed. "Actually, do you mind if I speak with the…filthy dwarves," I forced myself to sound disgusted.
Legolas' eyes narrowed as he took a step toward another set of stairs leading to the cellar. "Why do you want to talk to your captors," he reasoned.
"Well the king acted as if he wanted something from Thorin," I replied evasively, "I suspect I can use their liking to me as an advantage to help him get what he wants. For all the kindness he is bestowing on me of course."
It was convincing to even myself, how my speech changed, coy and innocent at the same time. Without another word Legolas nodded and left, stomping down the stairs two at a time. In a hurry I ran to Thorin's cell first, slapping my hands against the bars to startle him to attention.
"What is your plan," I whispered hurriedly before Legolas returned.
"Find the keys to the cellar and release us, we will figure out the rest as we go," he muttered looking around too. "Where is Bilbo?"
"Lurking around somewhere I suppose, he is probably trying to formulate a plan himself," I muttered. "Ideas on where the guards with the keys went?"
"The wine cellar," Kili's voice called out behind me. Slowly I left Thorin, to walk hurriedly to Kili's cell and lean into it to see him more properly. His fingers wrapped around mine through the cold metal as his eyes raked my body. "I very much like that dress."
A small smile tugged at my lips, "Thank you. It is too tight."
"Little doe," he whispered, face pressing against the bars, "I am truly sorry for what I did before we came to be here."
"Its alright," I squeezed his hand, "it was the sickness of the woods. I understand. Just focus on trying to get out of here for now." I pressed my lips against his fingers, feeling the coldness in his flesh seep into my soft skin.
We had to get out of here.
Previous Chapter << Chapter 14: Moonlight Hues
Next Chapter >> Chapter 16: Lucid Trickery
#the hobbit fanfiction#the hobbit fanfic#kili x reader#kili x oc#kili durin#kili#kili fanfic#kili fanfiction#when lightning strikes
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Hello again! Thank you so so much for the wonderful imagine, it really helped to cheer me up, so I hope it's okay if I request another one! My birthday's coming up relatively soon, it's actually on February 14th (Valentine's Day), so I was wondering if you could write an imagine about how some members of Thorin's Company (specifically Bilbo, Thorin, Fili, Kili, Bofur, Ori and Dwalin if that's alright) would treat their s/o on their birthday. That'd be a wonderful early birthday present! Thanks!
Aw! Happy early birthday! A Valentine’s baby, how sweet! Thank you for your patience with this one, I hope you enjoy, some of these characters I’m not 100% familiar with, but I’ll try! I am laughing and squealing with glee over some of these. What are your ideas?
Bilbo would be a busy little bee, cooking and baking literally everything in the Shire for you. He’d make all your favorite foods. He knows all your absolute favorites, he spends weeks gathering all your family’s recipes and he uses some of his own so you have some familiar and some new takes on old favorites. But also, if you’ve said in the past that you liked something? No matter how long ago you said it, he made it. You look around and you don’t even know what some of these foods are, but everything is scrumptious and delicious and perfect. He spends hours and hours on an elaborate, beautiful, decadent cake that you can barely have one piece of because it’s so rich in taste! By the time he’s done, there is enough food to feed all of the Shire and it gives him an excuse to invite all your family and closest friends over for the feast. And fireworks! Thoughtful, hardworking Bilbo just warms your heart and you thank him with a hug and a kiss, and thought it’s against his manners, he allows it and blushes like a tomato in front of the whole party.
Thorin would hold a ball for you. It’s not an every day thing, he doesn’t often hold big parties, but for you, he does this. You’ve never spoken about it, but he knows you appreciate and enjoy some of the finer things in life. You are down to (middle) earth and responsible, but when you open the gorgeous wrapping to find a perfect, custom gown of your favorite color and style, he adores how your eyes light up like beacons. He’s set out your favorite jewelry, along with a new necklace that accentuates the line of the gown around your chest perfectly. He leads you into the Grand Hall on his arm and watches with pride as you ogle the decorations and he feels your fingers tighten around him as the musicians play your favorite dancing music. You thank him profusely, never leaving his side all night and he kisses you, toasts you, and says this is the least he can do for his One.
Fili would basically disappear in the days leading up to your birthday. You’re kind of upset about it, did you do something wrong? You haven’t even made dinner plans or anything, did he forget about your birthday? You’d feel over dramatic, but it would still hurt your feelings, only because you didn’t know where he was and why he’d disappeared. Then you find out. He shows up first thing in the morning, sits on your bed with your favorite foods and treats and gives you a wrapped gift. You eye him, opening the ribbons and the paper to find a stunning, intricately decorated, silver jewelry box that he made himself at the forge. Your eyes blow wide and you look at him anew, see him grinning as he gives you a small silver key on a red ribbon. He nods at you to open it and when you do, your eyes fill with tears. With his own hands, he made you a gorgeous set of jewelry- necklace, bracelet and hair beads with your and his runes on them. It took him hours upon hours to finish and you take his hands, seeing the new callouses all over and kiss him in speechless thanks.
Kili would wake you up with countless kisses. When you finally opened your eyes, you’d see that you were surrounded by hundreds of your favorite flowers. He knows how much you adore them- the beauty, the colors, the smells. They sit in vases all over the chambers, the petals lie on your bed, and a new scarf of floral print sits in a box on the foot of your bed. You spend the day in the gardens, walking hand in hand and talking, he puts flowers in your braids until they form a crown. You sit on the bench in the middle of the gardens, surrounded by your favorite flowers and he turns you, pointing to the back of the bench. He had it remade with a plaque dedicating it to you, with love from him for your birthday. Needless to say, this earns him many thankful kisses.
Bofur would organize a party in his home, something small with only your favorite friends and family- just the way you liked. He’d have your favorite foods and decorations, he’d do his best to clean which was sweet in itself because he may be quite the messy little dwarf. He’d whirl you around his home as the other dwarfs played the music on their instruments. He’d make sure you had the best time and then, when you were finally alone for the night, he’d give you your birthday gift. New hair beads and a warm winter hat that he made himself. He’d say they’re not the best, and it took him too long, they almost weren’t ready for today, and he will bring you to the market tomorrow to pick something out, but you stop his rambling with a bleary eyed kiss because you’re so touched that he took the time and effort to make these things for you on top of hosting the perfect celebration.
Ori would write you poetry. You wouldn’t see him until the afternoon, but you’d wake to see a wax sealed envelope by your pillow with a good morning wish. Then you’d find a poem on your desk, another in your coat pocket, another attached to the door. Gorgeous, thoughtful, adoring poetry that was catered to you completely and written by him throughout the year. You’d be so touched, they would bring tears to your eyes and you’d admire the sweet doodles on the corners. When you finally saw him, he couldn’t even look you in the eyes because he felt so embarrassed and vulnerable, but your running hug lifts his spirits and gives him the courage to give you a small, handmade box of the poems he’s written for you in the past. He thinks you should have them.
Dwalin would write you a song. You had no idea he played the harp so well, never mind could write such stunning, touching lyrics. He’d be by your side all day, celebrating with you and your friends in your home and in the taverns and finally, when you were alone for the day, he’d tell you to sit on your bed. You were totally expecting something else and you almost laugh when he turns and disappears from the room! Then he rolls in a harp that he had stored in the back little room, and sits next to you, plucking a gorgeous melody with his nubby, calloused fingers. His voice is low, deep, soothing and soft, and he sings of the stars, moon, and sun and how they revolve around his love. He sits back and you hold his hand, he wipes the tears that began to fall and kisses you deeply for long moments. Then he pulls back and threatens you not to tell anyone with a joking smile.
#ask#answered#washed up warlock#imagine#kili imagine#fili imagine#thorin imagine#bilbo imagine#dwalin imagine#ori imagine#bofur imagine#washed-up-warlock
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1, 15, 20, 29, 32, 43, 49, 58, 62, 66, 83, 85, 98 ♥
1. coffee mugs, teacups, wine glasses, water bottles, or soda cans?
Wine glasses because I can feel fancy drinking lemonade or juice.
15. favorite book you read as a school assignment?
Le Bourgeois gentillhomme by Moliere. Seriously, I love it. It’s old and I did read it in the original French and I love it.
20. preferred place to write (i.e., in a note book, on your laptop, sketchpad, post-it notes, etc.)?
On my laptop specifically in Word. But as a plus, I do sometimes like to handwrite on nice, lined paper when I’m feeling particularly inspired.
29. best way to bond with you?
For real- come spend a day doing lazy things like watch anime, eat pizza/snacks, and chit-chat about anything and everything. I’m super shy but deep down I am an extrovert and when I get comfy I will chat with you about nothing until the cows come home.
32. top five favorite vines?
“I was sitting there, barbecue sauce on my tiddy,” “Johnny has 19 bottles of dish soap,” “Fuck this shit I’m out,” that one where the guy is jamming to the Bop It, “FrEESH Ava ca do!”
43. hoodie, leather jacket, cardigan, jean jacket or bomber jacket?
Hoodie all day every day *dabs*
49. what saying or quote do you live by?
“Not all who wander are lost.”
58. four talents you’re proud of having?
Learning languages and specifically my fluency in French is the top one, since I built it from nothing in a monolingual household. Hand-sewing, my newest favorite skill. Graphic design (which until I get new software I unfortunately cannot show off ;-;). Cooking a mean super-delicious spaghetti sauce.
62. seven characters you relate to?
Eugeo (family issues), Minoru Utsugi (I’m scared of forming tight relationships because what if I lose one oh god-), Deku (Look at these tear ducts ya’ll!), Bilbo Baggins (some days I wanna just go home and have none of this unpredictable adventure called life!), Tanaka from Haikyuu (literally me playing sports...I’m love him), Umetarou Nozaki (art problems he’s such a mood), Narumi from Wotakoi (a whole ass mood when it comes to being a nerd).
66. favorite flower(s)?
Hibiscus, orchids, and cone flowers!
83. writing or drawing?
Writing. :3
85. fairy tales or mythology?
Mythology!!!
98. favorite historical era?
US in the 50s, you know, with the poodle skirts and the soda shoppes and the juke boxes and the dudes in leather coats.
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Be careful about having high expectations for Gen Lock. The series is created by Rooster Teeth Productions, who tend be to hit and miss. They created great series like Camp Camp, but they also created RWBY, which has a rep for having terrible writing in the later seasons. Characters are unlikable or Mary Sues; the plot is poorly structured and it made a lot of questionable choices. At this point, it could be either or. Only time will tell if it's the next Camp Camp or RWBY.
and
“I would be careful about having high expectations for Gen Lock if I were you. Gen Lock is created by Roaster Teeth Productions, who are also the creators of RWBY. That series went down hill after the 3rd season. Granted some of it had to do with the creator dying, but the writing dipped in quality. After watching the first and second ep, it reminds me a lot of VLD, including the humour. Reviewers said it didn’t dive into character motivation or any of the world building by the 5 ep point.”
Hi Anon, thank you for the Asks!
Given the wording of both of these, I assume they are both from you.
I’m going to try to reign in my salt here, but you happened to hit more than a few buttons with your Ask. Gonna keep this as brief as I can to focus on the core of my answer. I promise I’m not grumpy.
The opening sentence in both of these Asks does not come across well. I can give the benefit of the doubt b/c this is the Internet, but uh…yeah.
RWBY continues to enjoy great popularity and comes up frequently on my dash. I’ve never seen it, it’s definitely not my thing, but it’s still selling to someone, and my VLD mutuals that love it are still talking it up so I’m glad that they have another show to entertain them. I see merch everywhere, it’s got a Japanese dub and a manga adaptation and that’s pretty damn good for a web cartoon that came out of the U.S. Must not be that terrible as whole to merit all of that.
“Mary Sue” is a phrase that means absolutely nothing because everyone overuses it to mean any number of things about competent and powerful female characters, and most of them are incredibly subjective, and rarely ever applied to male characters who meet the same kinds of subjective goal-post shifting criteria.
Perhaps gen:LOCK will simply be the “first gen:LOCK” and not the “next anything.”
I didn’t find the humor in gen:LOCK to be like VLD at all.
Reviewers can eat my asshole.
And on that note:
Not every story benefits from a deep dive, or even a superficial exploration of character motivation or world-building.
Such things are very genre and plot dependent, and the perception of such is subjective.
Some of the greatest short stories, or even long-form novels don’t even bother with much of either if they are not necessary to advance the plot. Not everything needs to be Lord of the Rings or Ulysses.
Who had better “character motivation”, Frodo Baggins from the LotR trilogy or Ripely from Alien? What would “better” even mean for either of those genres? LotR and Alien are worlds apart, and yet, at the end of the day, the protagonists are fighting for survival against an unspeakable horror. The “journey” of their survival differs greatly, and those journeys are the point, the character motivations are really minimal and don’t require a lot of exploration.
Frodo’s character motivation can be summed up as: “save the fucking Shire by destroying a cursed evil ring” and a little bit of “Uncle Bilbo ruined me for the simple Hobbit life with his crazy stories.” While Ripley’s motivation is: “kill the xenomorphs before they kill me and my cat.” That’s it. Don’t even need in-character exposition or a flashback to describe Ripley’s. The genre hands it to you on a blood-soaked silver platter.
I don’t know what those reviewers were watching but the “character motivation” of the main characters that I saw in the pilot episode alone was pretty fucking obvious: HOLD THE LINE in a dystopian world were “freedom” hangs by a thread. They are trying to survive. That’s all it needs to be.
I don’t care why they joined the Vanguard. I have plenty of friends and family within various armed forces and their motivations range from complex to simple, but most of them are a variation on “I want to serve my country and my people.” That’s it, and that’s okay.
Additionally, Julian Chase’s backstory and motivation was made clear in the first 10 minutes through the positioning of him before the wall with his dead father’s memorial flag, and the conversation between the three most important people in his life: mother, sister, and fellow comrade-soldier/girlfriend (Miranda, great symbolism by the way in that name).
That pilot episode is Julian’s “super hero/science fiction origin story”. His Big Damn Hero moment is fueled by his “character motivation” to protect his loved ones, and inspired by the verses from his dead hero father’s favorite song: “Let the Good Times Roll.”
Any hyper-critical reviewer that missed that is full of shit.
And those verses?
“You only live once / But when you’re dead you’re gone / So let the good times roll”
That was clever and poignant foreshadowing, b/c GENRE. It also wasn’t super deep…and it didn’t have to be. It only needed to connect the threads of Julian’s introduction, who he is, something special that he shares with his mother, father, and girlfriend, and what his role will be in the show, and the nature of his being from here on out.
At the bare minimum, someone in the writers’ room is aware (even if only in passing) of the some of the most enduring questions that science-fiction (especially cyberpunk) has asked and navel-gazed over regarding the role of technology in extending human life, and what exactly defines “life” when one has left the meat-space. I’m not expecting gen:LOCK to be an exploration into the ethics and details of transhumanism/post-humanism/singularity philosophies and futurist dreams for humanity. It doesn’t have to be. They’ve already touched on the concepts and anyone who loves that sort of thing will notice.
My expectations for gen:LOCK are that—at worst—it will be as entertaining and to-the-point as the GI Joe cartoon in the 80s. I enjoyed GI Joe (pro-military propaganda aside), it was a regular thing for me to make the effort to watch. I didn’t love it like I did The Adventures of the Galaxy Rangers, or Robotech, or Voltron DotU, or Silverhawks, or Jem and the Holograms, but it was still fun and entertaining and it still is.
GI Joe didn’t waste time with a full exploration of Cobra Commander’s backstory or his motivations, nor did it do so with most of the Joes. The basics were all that was needed. GI Joe wasn’t about complexity and it didn’t need to be in order to tell an entertaining story while selling toys. Yes, sometimes you’d get some really interesting episodes that added dimension in between the more obvious filler. Shit, it took like 50+ episodes to get to a Destro-focused episode. I certainly wasn’t watching GI Joe for character motivations and world-building. I was watching because nearly every character had an interesting design and they all did unique things, and Cobra Commander was hilarious. I watched to see what they would come up with next.
Did I really need a compelling story behind Zartan, Zandar, and Zarana? Nope. They were fun villains that gave the heroes hell and spoke with shitty Australian accents. In the 80s, the Aussie accent was all the rage for edgy characters (oh Stingray…).
Do people remember anything about Scarlett other than she was the hot redhead?
I loved Scarlett, she was my She-Ra, and one of the main reasons why I watched GI Joe. But only the most hardcore GI Joe fans remember her stats and abilities. She was actually one of the most highly qualified and skilled Joes. From Scarlett’s Wikipedia article:
“Her primary specialty for the team is counter intelligence. Scarlett is additionally skilled in martial arts and acrobatics. She started training at age 9 with her father and three brothers, who were all instructors, and she earned her first black belt at age 15. Scarlett also graduated summa cum laude, and passed her Bar Exams to practice law, before moving into the military. She graduated from Advanced Infantry Training and Ranger School, and received special education in Covert Ops School, Marine Sniper School, Special Air Service School, and Marine Tae Kwon Do Symposium. Although she is as adept with standard weapons as any of her comrades, her weapon of choice is the XK-1 power crossbow, which fires various bolts with specialized functions. Scarlett is also a qualified expert with the M-14, M-16, M1911A1 Auto Pistol, M79 grenade launcher, M-3A1, M-700 Remington sniper rifle, MAC-10, throwing stars, garotte and KA-BAR (Combat Knife)”
Wow. Beautiful and striking appearance. High intelligence. Great martial prowess. Top shelf military training.What a goddamned Mary Sue.
So, if you’re still with me Anon, my point is that if gen:LOCK can be a “good enough” futuristic-cyberpunk-ish version of GI Joe that gives me fun and interesting-but-not-complex characters in command of infantry mechs, configurable jets, and a color coordinated team of save-the-day-big-damn-hero-style mecha who fight against a sinister force that has weaponized nanotech and colossal mechas that look like War of the Worlds meets Eldritch Horrors then I’ll be pretty fucking happy with it. The bar ain’t exactly high here.
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Writing
I hate formally planning stories so much, but I l know it’s gotta happen. So I’m organizing my thoughts on it. Not a proffessional or published author, but I don’t think you need to be to have good thoughts on this topic. Not a lot of new information here, but it could be helpful.
Disclaimer: Endgame spoilers
As I see it, there are two things you need to start: setting and character.
Setting
Start with genre. When I started writing at the ripe young age of 6 years old, I always began book ideas with only a theme. I wanted to write about knights or pirates, and went from there. Personally I wouldn’t start with the type of book as opposed to the very specific topic.
My favorite book series as a child was Narnia. One thing C.S. Luis was good at was fleshing out his world. He really made it come alive. This is the way I started planning my book. I basically wrote a history of this land. Bad idea. Do NOT pull a Tolkien. Its all well and good for someone who can literally just invent an entirely new language, but your story will get nowhere fast. In Narnia the titular kingdom is not the central focus, but in Tolkien’s work middle earth (and surrounding areas) is the central focus. As much as we adore frodo and bilbo and gandalf, it’s not about them. It’s more about what happened in the history of this place, and he pulls it off well. It’s really hard to write a history textbook and call it a good story. Focus on geography, and don’t think too hard on what you’re going to write into your story. History and myth and legend and politics are all good things, but don’t expect that to be your story, there won’t be enough interesting content that flows well from one to the other.
Characters
Characters are the most important part of a story. Come up with at least 5-10 characters and write down a really short backstory, and want their biggest ideal is. What is their perfect self/world? Start an outline. Point one is one to three words that define your character at the beginning of the story. The final point will be one to three words that define them at the end of the story(how they reach or change their ideal). Each subpoint will describe in detail how they achieved this status, the repercussions of them reaching this status, and what they are trying to do now they’re here. Fill in similar points to describe their journey and once all your characters have at least five-ten points, your story is practically written. Conflict is generated by conflicting interests between the characters, and they will naturally ally themselves with the most advantageous people. Also remeber it’s okay for your characters to fail at any point. Since this is fresh in everyone’s mind, let’s use Iron Man, Tony Stark fron the MCU. Spoiler for Endgame ahead.
Tony Stark
The son of the genius inventor, Howard Stark, Tony Stark is the fun-loving ceo of Stark industries.
Ideal: He idealizes the ability to protect those who cannot protect themselves.
1. Arms Dealer
A. Tony inherited Stark Ind. from his father.
B. The company is prospering like never before under his guidance.
C. He is always looking to have a good time with whoever is physically closest to him. He does what he wants.
2. Avenger
A. Tony becomes a founding member of the Earth’s mightiest heroes by flying a nuclear missile into a wormhole above new york. Also for paying for everything, and making everyone look cooler.
B. The Avengers are at the top of their game and are defeating every threat that presents itself.
C. Tony wants to do better. He wants to Preemptively stop any threat that comes, terrestrial or extraterrestrial. He wants to put “a suit of armor around the world.”
3. Sacrificial lamb
A. Tony failed to save the universe from Thanos, but found a way to try again. He eventually takes the infinity gauntlet from Thanos, and proclaims “I am Iron Man.” one last time before eradicating Thanos and his army.
B. He saves the universe at the cost of his own life.
C. Dead
*Stops sobbing* Okay. You can see here how it works. Now all you need is to write out the details.
Tl;Dr: Setting and Characters are literally the only things you need and the plot will practically write itself.
Final disclaimer here: I am not an expert, feel free to add or criticize and discuss. Discussion is how progress is made.
#writing#creative writing#books#authors on tumblr#tips for authors#book planning#novel writing#book research
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21 Questions Tag
Holy crap, I haven’t done one of these in what feels like a lifetime! I was tagged by @whataremetaphor and @possibledreamswriting, thanks lovelies! 💖
Not tagging anyone because I don’t know who to tag anymore haha, sorry! But if anyone wants to join in, please do (and be sure to tag me so I can see)!
1. What’s your eye color? Dark brown
2. Who’s your favorite person in the world? Me? My younger brother 💖
3. What’s your favorite snack? Is coffee a snack? Coffee should def count as a snack. Otherwise, it’s a toss-up between bittersweet chocolate or ube rolls!
4. Following? I’m currently following 469 (lol) people.
5. Writing Motto? “Fuck you, spellcheck, I know what I’m about, even if that sentence does have seven unnecessary commas.” [Sorry, I don’t have a real motto.]
6. Favorite TV Shows? Archer, Bob’s Burgers... Hannibal is probably my all-time fave though!
7. What’s your favorite fairytale? Beauty and the Beast?
8. Favorite Song? This kind of changes like, hourly tbh, but long-term might be The Chain by Three Days Grace.
9. Languages I’m fluent in? English and bad English. That’s a Fifth Element reference i’m sorry
10. Languages I can count to ten in? English, Spanish, Tagalog.
11. Top 5 Mythical Creatures, in order? (1): Nagas (2): Imps (3): Ingkantos (4): Basilisks (5): Hellhounds
12: What’s your favorite sport? To watch/favorite on a professional level? Basketball, for sure. To play? Volleyball.
13: Favorite Musical Character? Erik/The Phantom from Phantom of the Opera. No one else even comes close to my obsession with him tbh.
14: Favorite TV Character? Hannibal Lecter, as played by Mads Mikkelsen.
15: Favorite Book Character? This question hurts my heart but honestly it’s probably Calder from Joe Abercrombie’s The Heroes/ the First Law series. Or Glokta, from the same. Or basically any of Abercrombie’s characters. All of them. Did I mention this is a hard question?
16: Are you a dog or a cat person? A dog person, for sure (although cats are great)! But unfortunately I’m allergic to both dogs and cats, so I don’t get to be around them very often. 😭
17: Favorite Genre? Grimdark fantasy, soft scifi, and literary fiction are my faves! But TBH I’m not very picky, I’ll read anything so long as I enjoy the prose.
18: Who is/are the best teachers you’ve ever had? Ahh... My parents, honestly. I grew up in a poor/shitty school district so, while I had some teachers I enjoyed, it was always my parents who taught me the most--not just in life but also academically. But I did really like my high school chem teacher!
19: Favorite Fanfiction (authored by someone else)? Honestly, this is such a hard question. I wrote fanfic for years. You would not believe how much of it I read. I guess... Turn (Harry Potter: Draco/Harry) and The Road Delivered Us Home (The Hobbit: Thorin/Bilbo) are the ones that I love and are well-written... But out there somewhere in the void is this fic titled In Too Deep (Legend of Zelda: Ghirahim/Link) which is probably my real favorite but the author took it down a couple years ago. Something about that fic always managed to stick with me and completely destroy my heart. When I was like, 13 and unbelievably depressed I used to steal some liquor and then I’d binge-read the fic in a matter of hours and then I’d send these super dramatic emails to @trash-fragments about the fic and I mean, this happened a lot, and now that whole thing seems super surreal and I’m genuinely upset that I can’t relieve those days anymore.
20: Favorite original story (authored by me)? Kinda hilarious (read: sad) b/c I’m not actively writing it right now--it’s been temporarily shelved b/c I need to sort some serious plot issues out with it--but Eosophobia is absolutely my favorite. It’s got biopunk, it’s got a post-apocalyptic world, it’s got a lot of varying immoral characters all out to get each other, it’s got slow burn romance, it’s got angst, it’s got found family, it’s got blood family, it’s got a lot of blood in general, it’s got engineered superviruses, it’s got sass, it’s literally got everything I could possibly ever want and it kills me that I can’t translate it onto the page yet.
21: What’s your favorite comic series on Webtoons? I’m highkey surprised that I remembered an answer for this, but I really like the series My Giant Nerd Boyfriend!! I don’t keep up with it tbh but I binged my way through a lot of it a couple months ago and it’s just super cute haha.
#okay but that fanfiction question seriously ruined me like i'm D E S T R O Y E D by all the memories#there's like a year and a half where literally every spare moment of my life i filled with reading and writing fanfic and doing#quite literally nothing else#and that's so surreal to me now like W H E R E did that passion go??? that insanity??? i literally never slept but wrote#hundreds of thousands of words of porn???? HELLO BRAIN CAN I GET THAT BACK#LET ME MAKE MY CHARACTERS SCREW PLEASE I SWEAR THAT'S LIKE A SUPERPOWER I WANT IT BAAAAAAACK#21q#tag game#about me#aschenink#whataremetaphor#possibledreamswriting
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Martin Freeman: Chameleon
Couldn’t sleep, and ended up finishing my rewatch of Fargo Season 1 this morning at 3am (IMO, the best Martin performance ever), and then figured I might as well finish up my rewatch of the Office UK as well (it was a productive pre-dawn).
I have always adored the transformation of Lester Nygaard. I mean, seriously. The character is amazing, and it was such an incredible role for Martin. To go from this:
to this:
(and everything along the way) is seriously one of the best journeys I’ve ever witnessed.
But then to follow it up with The Office (in the order I watched this morning, obviously not IRL):
It really just reminded me how outrageously diverse he is... and how when he embodies these characters, you can rarely see the others. And then of course I started thinking about other roles he’s done that I love:
Phil Rask in Startup:
Bilbo Baggins in The Hobbit:
And obviously, the role I fell in love with him in in the first place (and always the top of my list):
Like... seriously.
Give him ALL THE AWARDS.
The man is a freaking chameleon. I honestly can’t think of another actor off the top of my head who has done such consistently jaw-dropping work in so many diverse roles. It’s incredible. There’s no danger he’ll get typecast at this point.
If anyone else has a favorite Martin role that I didn’t list, I’d love to hear it. I have been working my way through his filmography, but there are still some gaps.
#Martin freeman#give him all the awards#fargo#lester nygaard#the hobbit#Bilbo baggins#the office#tim canterbury#sherlock#John watson#eye candy
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Rules: name your top ten favorite characters from ten different fandoms and tag ten people.
Tagged by @ghostoftheyear
1) Prompto Argentum from Final Fantasy XV. Not only is he one half of my OTP (Promnis) but I really do see so much of myself in him. Hiding behind smiles and self deprecating jokes all the time. I also just really identify with the core lesson of his character: you are so much more than where you came from.
2) Kurama from Yu Yu Hakusho. My first ever fandom and the one that got me into writing fanfics. Kurama is smart but compassionate, capable of ruthlessness and cool deductions but far more human than he appears (or is expected to be). Also my first fandom crush (figures it was the most feminine guy in the show lol).
3) Hobbits. Just any hobbit. Bilbo, Frodo, Sam, Merry, Pippin. I love them all. I reread those books over and over as a kid and I actually very rarely reread books so that's saying something. I love their nature: easygoing but prepared to fight if need be.
4) Sherlock Holmes. Listen. I am a crazy Holmsian. There is so much brain space wasted on useless Sherlock Holmes trivia. And I love almost every iteration/adaptation of it--except, surprisingly, "Sherlock." I'm sorry but Holmes is not a sociopath. Bipolar and a drug addict, most likely, but a sociopath is an entirely different thing and he is not that. If you want a "modern" version I actually much prefer the American version "Elementary." That Holmes feels much closer to the mark. (Also did you know that House, M.D. is secretly a Sherlock Holmes adaptation? I could go on all day...no really.)
5) Bones McCoy from Star Trek TOS. He's that special surely southern that cares so much underneath it all. And his love/hate relationship with Spock on the show is just the best. Any scene with the three of them on the bridge makes me instantly smile. Speaking of which...
6) Spock from Star Trek TOS (I know, same fandom, but I couldn't choose). A child of two very different worlds, but unlike Kurama he hasn't really seemed to figure out how to balance it very well, trying to reject his human side as much as possible. The episodes where he faces issues of bigotry and self discovery are some of my all time favorites.
7) Pidge from Voltron. I loved Pidge from the start but the fact that (spoilers) her gender reveal didn't change her character in any way OR the way that other characters relate to her makes me love her even more. She's determined, intelligent, and 100% her own person and I love her so much for that.
8) Makoto from Persona 5. I feel like Makoto may very well be one of the most complicated characters in that game. She goes from being almost a spy to one of the "good guys" without compromising her integrity. She sets out from the start to do what she feels is right, and that objective evolves as she learns more about the world. She also speaks to me on a personal level: the overachiever who's "soul" is a rebel biker? Hell yeah!
9) Fallout 4 female protagonists. Okay, this feels like cheating a bit, but hear me out. When I played Fallout 4 I created a very specific character to portray called Hildy Sinclair. Hildly was a typical 50's style housewife who braved the wasteland to find her son and became a warrior along the way. She was also obsessed with the Silver Spirit and cosplayed him at every opportunity, spouting classic lines at her enemies as she mowed them down. I put well over 100 hours into crafting her story and it was one of the most rewarding gaming experiences of my life, even if she is a character I made up. I hope you live the rest of your life comfortably with your robotic son, Hildy. ♡
10) Sans from Undertale. It's really hard to pick just one character from Undertale, but I think it has to be him. His relationship with his brother is just precious and in a good/neutral run he's an unexpectedly heartfelt friend to the protagonist. And on a genocide run you realize that not only has he lost everything, but that he's probably the only other character other than you and Flowey who realizes this has all happened before...which is horrifyingly sad. Also that boss fight...definitely one of my crowning achievements in gaming has been defeating Sans. No bones about it.
Ten people, oh man. Uhhhhh, I'll tag @sunshineandsnark27 @sayura21 @strawberryflats @spitfirerose @prompto-cam @d-zombiedragon @ignis-sassentia @ham-for-ham-sandwich @dirtyhecker @cndrow
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