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pigeonxp · 3 years

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YGCMA songs and how they relate to c!Wilbur based off of yesterday’s lore (in my biased opinion)

This is so dumb and i literally don’t care. I can’t think about anything else other than doing this synopsis even tho like 28480329204 other people are going to do it. idc.

(I listened to the songs earlier, and i’m also listening to them as i write the opinions. these are basically just my thoughts while listening tbh. im also not doing the full song, just some things i feel relate within each song)

- Jubilee Line

the lines at the beginning of the song, “hate to see you leaving / a fate worse than dying” could relate to how wilbur feels after tommy gets pulled back into the overworld. or, he could be referencing L’Manburg and how he hates to see his country leaving him (ouch).

then we have the lines “your city gave me asthma / so thats why im fucking leaving / and your water gave me cancer / and the pavements hurt my feelings”. This could be in relation to L’Manburg as a whole. He put everything he had into L’Manburg and it only ended up hurting him in the end. yikes.

now we have “shout at the wall / ‘cause the walls dont fucking love you” repeated. This could be in reference to when he said he was fucking kicking and screaming to get out of the train station. hes screaming and he doesnt care because it doesnt matter to him. it doesnt love him just like how the people of L’Manburg didnt love him. wilbur get therapy challenge.

so based on the lore from yesterday, we know that c!wilbur’s limbo was a train station (props to fanartists. i love you.), presumably the YCGMA album cover type deal. when he sings “Theres a reason / that London puts barriers on the tube line / theres a reason / that London puts barriers on the rails” repeated. if the train station looks like how they do on the album cover, there could be barriers where he is. maybe hes trying his best to just kill himself over again by jumping onto the tracks. just in an attempt to escape. jfc

“theres a reason they fail”. he was still in the train station, wasnt he?

- Saline Solution

for this one, i feel like hes pretty far into the void and regretting his decision to have phil kill him. hes tired of being in a fucking train station for years on end.

“i think this time im dying / im not melodramatic / im just pragmatic beyond any / reasoning for thinking ive got / fuckin rabies or something.” hes so fucking sick of being in this goddamn train station and he thinks hes dying. hes so pent up and sick of being there, maybe hes just in so much pain that he feels like hes dying. if hes been there for a while, hes probably bound to go crazy at some point, hence the “pragmatic beyond any reasoning.”

“I think ive lost my mind / blurring the fact and the fictions” this feels like he really does believe hes going crazy and is mixing up the things he really knows and the things his mind is creating for him. maybe this is when tommy first arrived and he cant tell if he real or not (thats a stretch but i figured id share it anyway.)

“I think ive made my choice / im a deceased playing victim / slip the face, slip the victory” he quite literally says that hes a deceased playing victim. hes literally saying hes dead HAHHAHAH anyway. maybe hes blaming himself again, because us c!wilbur apologists all know that hes very good at doing that.

“Sit secluded in hatred /.../” hes sitting in a fucking train station for god knows how long beating himself up over and over again and just hating himself. hes all alone. with himself. someone he fucking loathes.

this is honestly all i have for Saline Solution, but i will definitely add more later if i get different theories.

- Since I Saw Vienna

This is my favorite song on the album and my comfort song so that could factor into this bit ahaha

im going to skip through this one a little bit and go to the line “The roads are my home, horizons my target / if i keep on moving, never lose sight of it / treating my memory of you like a fire, let it / burn out, don’t fight it, try to move on” this sounds like hes reminiscing on his home in L’Manburg and his presidency was something he relied on and he would fight to get it back, but now that hes dead and said that it should remain that way that he should just let it go. trying to move on from his symphony, forever unfinished.

“its been sixty weeks since i saw vienna / a bandage and a wide smile slapped across my face / ill pick up my hiking boots when i am ready / and ill put down my roots when im dead.” THESE LINES FUCK ME UP IN GENERAL BUT HOW THEY RELATE TO C!WILBUR RN IS JUST SUIBHYSBUSHDXNSKJDNHBD YK???? in the context that vienna is L’Manburg and he died, its saying that its been a long ass time since hes seen it and hes faking being okay about his death. he misses it but doesnt want to admit it. the picking up the hiking boots when hes ready is him moving on from his L’Manburg, and putting his roots down when hes dead is finally being okay with not living there/being an important part of it. he believed his death was the best for the people in L’Manburg and L’Manburg itself. it seems like hes still trying to convince himself.

“Ill be gone then, for when you must be alone.” hes gone. hes dead. hes in the train station. he left the L’Manburgians alone and hes alone in his limbo. man.

- Losing Face

this song is angry. hes so fucking angry. my thoughts are that this is about the following presidents after him. he feels like the L’Manburgians were happier without him and im pretty sure he believed that even when Schlatt was president. this is so evident in the lyric “Is he better than me?” Hes literally asking if the other presidents were better than he was. he doesnt believe he did everything he could to be the best president, even though we all know that he gave everything that he was into that country and then some. he broke himself for the L’Manburg but he doesnt believe hes enough. sheesh.

“Ive seen him / ive been him / ive felt the same way” even though he cant see the new presidents being president, he knows what its like. he knows that they might break under the pressure. hes been there. he knows how if feels. yikes.

“Ive lost all meaning / ive lost my sense of hope” this feels like when he was nearing the end of L’Manburg when he blew it up, and that he feels like trying to win it back is pointless. he has no hope for it anymore, so why not give up? his mental state is already shit yk so i cant really blame him for feeling that way.

“i dont care / i want you here / as long as youre happy, i dont care” this line. this fucking line. hes lost hope in being president, but he doesnt care. he just wants the L’Manburgians to be happy. that was his whole thought process while he was president. he didnt matter to himself, he just wanted them to be happy. he sacrificed his mental state for them. cries in wilbur apologist.

- Your Sister Was Right

this is my second favorite song on the album i think HAHAHAH

anyway

“I use everyone i ever meet / i cant find the perfect match / abuse those i love / while i ostracize the ones who love me / back.” wowie wow wow fucking ouchie. He feels like he uses his friends. this whole thing is a projection of his shit ass mental state rn fucking hell. he feels like hes abusive. thats what everyones been telling him. they tell him he was awful and a shit president and all that jazz even though hes been killing himself trying to be the best for them but its still not enough (pigeon projecting? more likely than you think)

“every time that i miss you / i feel the way you hurt / and i dont deserve you / you deserve the world / though it feels like we were built / from the same dirt.” man. hes dead lol. he misses the L’Manburgians. not only were they his supporters, but they were all his friends too. every time he misses his friends he feels their pain of when he first blew up L’Manburg. he feels like because he caused them all pain that they dont like him and that they never liked him and that he is undeserving of their friendship. he still wants to be friends with them. he still loves them. he still wants the best for them. he thinks theyre so much better than him even though they all created L’Manburg together. in reality they are all the same, but their actions impact each other and he feels that his actions make him worse than them or less than. fuckisonmdfnpbhife

“and i hate to say it / but your sister was right / dont trust english boys / with far too much free time” sister is dream mayhaps. fuckngeionsfjg that hurt sorry uhhh anyway yeah sister is dream?? he did say that wilbur would be a shit president and he believes that hes a shit president so he thinks they were all right about him being a shit president fbhjebinfnejg. maybe sister is just everyone who didnt believe in wilbur. man....

“a fucking waste of time” do i even need to explain this one? he fr doesnt belive hes worth it anymore and that hes literally a waste of time. hjkfbhnfve

- La Jolla

this one feels pretty far into train station limbo to me as well. namely from “and im lonely / there i said it” this could either be him being lonely as president and feeling like he doesnt have anyone to talk to really because hes too busy trying to hold himself together for everyone. either that or hes lonely in the station and didnt want to admit it because this is what he wanted. he wanted to die. he wanted to be dead because he believed thats what everyone else wanted and he just wanted the best for them.

“i could go away / i could pack my things and be gone before you wake” he could leave if they asked him to. he would do anything for them.

“you know ive tried hard to love me too / it always seems to fall in, through” this line already physically pained me but now it hurts even more having to relate it to a character i love. we already know that his mental state was declining as his presidency continued, but this would confirm that hes just trying to love himself even though he can never seem to get it right.

“my own personal sunset” this is just the ‘this is my sunrise’ line but different. my man misses the sun. fuck.

- I’m Sorry Boris

this song is almost definitely from a long ass time in the limbo.

“and im sorry / but, boris / im leaving / im not good for anyone here” boris represents L’Manburgians!! hes talking about how hes leaving the world by planning on killing himself. fuck.

“we reached the end of a decade” mans been dead for a decade. sheesh.

he then goes on to say that he cant believe hes leaving, he doesnt think he wants to leave them, but he thinks its whats best for them.

he talks about how they do all of these bullshit things before helping you and i know its in reference to london but for the sake of my sanity its about the presidency role and how it will fuck you up before bothering to help you not want to kill yourself.

should i do a separate post about how i visualized it/about how i thought about the song in paragraph form like a lowkey explanation? idk how to explain it but in this one i wanted to just cover some of the lyrics of the songs and my thoughts on them. i think c!wilbur wrote these in the limbo after he died. i know this is also shit and Not Good, but i really just needed to get my thoughts out before it killed me. i also didnt reread this. its probably repetitive and shit yk. i do Not Care. id also love to hear thoughts on this if yall want to. if you made it this far i love you please hydrate and eat today and youre so sexy ahaha

“and even though im finished / im not quite done with it” even though hes finishing his symphony by blowing it up, hes now realizing he wished he hadnt blown it up and that he hadnt killed himself. man.

#tw death #tw suicide #wilbur soot #ycgma #dream smp #tommyinnit #dream #c!wilbur #fuck i love this album

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letsdiscoverkitty · 4 years

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Hey Kitty, what are some things you can hold onto right now as reasons to fight a little longer/harder? I know there was a time when you were in school and probably had hopes and dreams for the future. What were they?

This is beyond hard to think about//answer but I am going to give it a go, thank you Molly. I am sorry for putting this off.

My hopes and dreams when I was in school? gosh. that is going back a bit. I was a bit of a lost soul whilst in education; I absolutely LOVED studying but never really had a set “thing” that I wanted to do. I was one of those people that was quite good/better than average at a number of things but didn’t have “one thing” I excelled at/found passion for (like Andi and computers!!). I don’t know if you have ever done that personality test online (I will find a link) - I came out as INFJ, which is “the advocate” and it pretty much sums me up - I could do a number of things/go down a number of career paths and do quite well at them but I tend to sway towards wanting to help others/solving things so that people do not need to be “saved”. (https://www.16personalities.com/infj-personality)

Okay reading back and I literally went on a life story about my school history, sorry about that!!!! I am not really sure where any of this is going/what it has achieved but yeah....

Anyway, back to school....so in middle school I was extremely sporty, LOVED sport so so much, and at one point thought I wanted to be a PE teacher. However there was always that other part of me, the academic side, that was itching/burning away - I found a real love for studying philosophy and ethics during GCSEs - I found it strange that no one else in my class seemed to be so “switched on” by it, suddenly all these questions were buzzing through my head about life and morals and, well, everything. I loved it. I also found myself in science (not biology) and I was also one of those annoying people that loved maths - SO MUCH. Anyway, during middle school I was ear-marked as someone who could possibly go to Oxbridge, and I think this was something that although it opened up loads of amazing opportunities for me and allowed me to do some really cool things (like going on trips to lectures, staying overnight in an Oxford hall, attending sessions at Winchester college, as well as participating in academic programmes and a Model United Nations day) it was also quite unhelpful. The pressure I felt was IMMENSE and it triggered off my perfectionism beyond belief. I suddenly felt very out of my depth and felt like I constantly HAD to be working harder, doing more (even if no one was saying it directly to me) but it never felt like “enough” because I was never as clever/as good at x as another person. I was always in that top band but never the best....(I think it was around this age, 13/14 when my ED first started making an appearance, and when I struggled quite a lot with anxiety and depression - there was also a lot of other things going on at home/in personal life but i wont go into that...). Come A levels and I was so conflicted on what to do...I could have gone down so many paths, initially I thought I would go down the sport route with possibly psychology but I felt like I was letting others down by doing so...I didnt want to narrow my studies so much (we had to cut to 4, and they had to fit into the timetable as well, which was beyond annoying as I stayed at my school in a very small 6th form). Suddenly the pressure really ramped up to another gear in A levels; I was tipped as the top candidate for head girl very early on and the 6th form targeted me and a boy as THE two people who WOULD go to Oxbridge...we were pushed beyond belief and told we were going to make “the school proud” bla bla bla....anyway, this is when anorexia really digged in DEEP. I was studying Maths, Chemistry, Philosophy/Ethics and Physics - back then we did AS exams in the January of our first year of AS (which they no longer do) as well as the summer so there was constant pressure - Anyway, because I was being told I had to apply for Oxbridge, I completely lost touch with what I wanted to do/where I was going/who I was doing it for..and Instead of trying to find a course I wanted to do, I tried to find one that I could “fit” into, Which ended up being Economics and Management (really kitty? REALLY?!). I was studying very hard and trying to keep up all my extra curricular activities at the same time (playing two musical instruments, swimming, netball, copious other sports, Duke of Edinburgh, volunteer swimming coaching etc) and man I just SANK. I also felt a lot of pressure from my parents (which wasnt there) to make them proud/do what they were good at (I craved a relationship with my parents as I felt like we didnt have one) as well as growing up in the shadow of Andi who was beyond BRILLIANT with computers/was flying in that world.

Okay wow, trying to get back on track here. erm as for what makes ME happy? what I want to do? I genuinely don’t know anymore. I have well and truly lost myself in every single way possible. I have lost touch with reality/normality. When I try to think about it it gets quite/very overwhelming....

I think I have a passion for helping others; and I love being around animals, as well as being ACTIVE (I miss sports so much), being in nature as well as travelling....I love to study, like love it, but I find all these courses at Unis can be incredibly narrow and thus I don’t really feel like any of them really fit me? idk. Part of me wonders about a degree apprenticeship but I dont know what in and all the ones I see are in tech/business. I need something which stimulates me; I can’t just sit at a desk. Oh and then throw in that I am quite creative/enjoy doing crafts and reading...my mind gets boggled and now I have no idea which way is up/down when thinking about what “I” want or could see myself doing.

MAN. I think I have gone off track quite a bit here....Maybe this is a bit too much for now. Maybe it is time for me to revisit some CLOSER and SMALLER goals and reasons to commit to change. Right now the bigger picture is far too overwhelming and hard to think about. I need to come back down to earth (if that makes sense?) as this all feels quite fairytale-esque/like a completely different person’s life that I am retelling.

Maybe I need to focus on the smaller things. Things like getting my concentration back to be able to read and write and do my crafts again. To have enough energy to get out and spend a day with people. I think I might start with that list first xx

#LONG ARSE LIFESTORY #pastelfeels

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ogkunty · 4 years

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Furcadia Toxicity

The complete log file is provided, everything here is unedited, this all transpired publicly and should be available for everyone to have access to at all times. Thank you. (19:14:03) Tacada: watching the riot police going (19:14:21) Kixy: Protesting doesn't do anything. (19:14:23) Kunty: Nah, tell people to spend time with their fucking families they keep trying to ride dicks/cunts out of (19:14:23) Tacada: theyre taking the hong kong approach the protestors. using cones n water to stop tear gas nades (19:14:32) Kunty: they riot if quarantined. (19:14:33) Ditty: god (19:14:37) Ditty: turned out as expected (19:14:45) Ditty: Kixy: People will make a bigger stink out of not being called the correct pronoun than anything important. (19:14:48) Ditty: so peoples pronouns are important (19:14:52) Ditty: not sure why you have to bring that into this lmao (19:14:58) Puffin: ^^^^^^ (19:15:01) Ditty: Maya: Just offer free heroin and meth, you'll see enough people. (19:15:02) Ditty: so thats gross (19:15:07) Ditty: not sure why you have to bring that into this either (19:15:08) Kunty: IDC about pronouns, why is that even a thing? (19:15:09) Kixy: The point was that people get more angry over stupid shit than anything serious? (19:15:15) Ditty: pronouns are not stupid shit (19:15:19) Kunty: They are (19:15:21) Kixy: Yes they are. (19:15:27) Puffin: Riots are the language of the unheard, fam (19:15:29) Kixy: Compared to SO SO many things. (19:15:34) Ditty: why do we have to compare (19:15:39) Ditty: peoples identities are extremely important (19:15:41) Ditty: you cant rank it among other things (19:15:54) Ditty: did you know humans have the capacity to care about multiple things at once or are furcadians not able to do that (19:15:55) Tacada: sorry ditty i started all of this O.O (19:15:57) Kunty: I agree with Kixy, pronouns are NOT important in comparison to riots, killings, and corona. (19:16:03) Ditty: why are we comparing them (19:16:06) Ditty: answer the question

SEE THE REST WITH THIS LINK TO THE HTML LOG FILE

----- ^^^ ----- ^^^ ----- ^^^ -----

The Devil’s Den Discord Meanwhile... Yes, you may Join.

/6:33 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: IMAGINE SEXUALLY HARASSING PEOPLE AND BEING TRANSPHOBIC AS FUCK ON FUCADIA [6:34 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: LITERALLY JUST FOR ATTENTION [6:34 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: WHO FAILED YOU [6:35 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: JK ITS YOUR OWN FUCKIN FAULT [6:35 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: "THE DEVIL'S DEN" THIS IS SOME SERIOUSLY TEEENY EDGELORD SHIT [6:35 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: ESPECIALLY WITH YOUR GROSS RAPE FANTASY THESAURUS-FUCKING DESCRIPTION [6:36 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: UNAPOLOGETIC SEXUAL HARASSERS SHOULD BE SHOT [6:39 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: jesus your discord server is dead as fuck [6:39 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: small wonder you have no friends [6:39 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: you are human garbage(edited) [6:43 PM] Hellcat: I'm here to fuck ass [6:44 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: its completely dead its no use [6:44 PM] Hellcat: Plague queens are my fetish tho [6:45 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: im here to fuck ass and fuck bubblegum [6:45 PM] Hellcat: Who failed you lmfao [6:45 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: yeah i had to rethink that cuz that'd mean it's someone else's fault [6:46 PM] Hellcat: It smells like poop and semen [6:47 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: as expected [6:55 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: [REDACTED] just thought yall should know your friend is a gross transphobe who repeatedly talked about my partner's genitals after being asked not to [6:55 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: and also claimed corona was a good thing because the world needs a "plague" [6:55 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: attention seeking teen edgelord bullshit [6:56 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: could only respond with "k" when it was brought up [7:08 PM] Ill: ? [7:09 PM] Ill: Logs please @Xzfgiiimtsath#6669(edited) [7:11 PM] Ill: It is without saying that unless evidence is provided, everything else is simply hearsay. I’m sorry to say that, without visible proof of this outrageous claim, you’re kind of just making empty accusations and slanderous character bashing. ): [REDACTED] [7:12 PM] Ill: Oh, I guess they just wanted to troll. ): I’m sorry, hopefully this can be cleaned up. [7:28 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: OH HI [7:28 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: JUST ASK HER SHE WONT DENY IT [7:28 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: she was pretty proud of it on furc [7:28 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: i can post logs but judging from your response to that you'd just say i'd edited them lol [7:29 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: is it really hard to believe that she'd say something like that? seems pretty in-character for her [7:31 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: i mean you guys jerk it to beast porn tho i dont have high hopes for any moral outrage here [7:31 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: but if there were any trans people in the server id def want them to know [7:33 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: she was shit-talking people who care about their pronouns [7:33 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: my partner, who is trans, tries to explain to them what's wrong with that [7:35 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: then Kunty's response is to repeatedly talk about not wanting to hear about their genitals(?) which has nothign to do with pronouns and wasnt part of the conversation [7:35 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: when asked to stop talking about their genitals she continues unabated just to piss them off(edited) [7:36 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: you can choose to believe im just making this up for no reason if you want, but that would be really fucking brickheaded of you [7:37 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: care more about your shitty transphobic friend repeatedly who was bringing up my partners genitals randomly and without their consent(edited) [7:37 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: @ill [7:40 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: again, 0 hopes for you response, youre a fantasy animal r*pe enthusiast who says things like, "It is without saying that unless evidence is provided," [7:40 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: holy fuck get your head out of your ass [7:41 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: but ill STILL warn you of your transphobic friend since judging on your art youre lgbtq+ [7:43 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: are you just gonna wait til i leave again to respond? figures [7:44 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: you didnt even ask them about it, just "NO EVIDENCE SO ITS FAKE" [7:44 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: you'd really go that far to defend this person when you have no idea what happened? [7:44 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: god you fucking suck [7:44 PM] Ill: Okay but [7:44 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: but nothing [7:44 PM] Ill: You are actively here [7:44 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: wow youre a fuckin genius or something eh [7:44 PM] Ill: Why are you being aggressive? [7:45 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: because im pissed [7:45 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: obviously [7:45 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: stupid question [7:45 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: why are you deflecting [7:45 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: and defending your transphobic friend for no god damn reason [7:46 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz [7:46 PM] Ill: Okay, I understand that you are in an emotional state right now, but I would really need you to calm down first before coming off on a rage to people that have no idea what you are upset over. [7:46 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: ? [7:46 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: read my post dumbass [7:46 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: then you'd know [7:46 PM] Ill: No [7:46 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: LOL [7:47 PM] Ill: Here is why [7:47 PM] Ill: The stupidest things we say are said out of Anger. [7:47 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: are you legit like 14 [7:47 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: im wasting my time [7:47 PM] Ill: I will advise you a little more directly that you take time to calm down before you come venting. [7:48 PM] Ill: No, I am asking you to be an adult [7:48 PM] Ill: And not a raging tween with a hormone spike [7:48 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: said the literal child who thinks having emotions means "not being an adult" [7:48 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: lmfao [7:48 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: not being pissed about transphobia is a character flaw [7:48 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: work on it bitch [7:48 PM] Ill: I emphasize with your anger, I am not saying it is wrong to have them [7:48 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: emphasize with my anger [7:49 PM] Ill: I am saying that you are abusing everyone else for things we have no knowledge or control over [7:49 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: what the fuck are you talking about [7:49 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: im warning you about your transphobic friend and youre being a piece of shit about it [7:50 PM] Ill: You are acting like a child, I’ve been there and done that - it does not end well. Please take time to self care for yourself first so you can be an adult that can have a calm conversation [7:50 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: and you also fantasize about r*ping animals so again: 0 hope for you to have any concept of why things are wrong [7:50 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: total fucking human garbage [7:50 PM] Xzfgiiimtsath: [8:05 PM] Ill: I am going to go step away before I address this further, I am losing some patience very quickly. I am kindly asking you to do the same so that you may take time to care for yourself during this clearly highly emotional state you are in. Maybe sip some cool water, dab your cheeks with ice, and/or take a moment with a loved one that makes you feel safe. I do not know what else to recommend here, I do not assume ignorance right away when meeting people, and I would like to think that other people can also step back to rationalize themselves down from tensions like these. I call this being an adult, growing up enough to get beyond yelling and throwing every accusation at someone simply because you’re angry. Accepting that it could be possible there is a grave misunderstanding, or maybe even misinterpretation of intent/meaning. As a person that never gets these opportunities to rationalize issues away from pure misunderstood hatred, I have never seen the actual outcome. In the adult world here, if we are angry with someone that offended us, we can’t just go into their family bbq and be screaming like lunatics about how their goat fuckers based solely on our interpretations, either. That would lead to calling the police... it doesn’t get you anywhere ... not in the adult world. You need to stop and care for yourself before you come guns blazing. You don’t DO this in the adult world and then call the adults staring at you like a tantruming toddler “children” because they won’t feed your anger. I’m sorry, for whatever it is you feel WE did to you specifically. You came here, though and whatever your assumptions are, I understand that there is no arguing with you or reasoning with you beyond you are the victim of some unproven atrocity.

- Xzfgiiimtsath#6669 - Hellcat#0186

(19:15:15) Ditty: pronouns are not stupid shit (19:15:19) Kunty: They are (19:15:21) Kixy: Yes they are.

#this is not okay #are you dumb #please read carefully #furcadia #furres #trans #misanthropy #unedited #real log #yes you may join #furries #furcadians #wow dude chill

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oflgtfol · 4 years

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I’m Going To Talk About Kung Fu Panda Now

as much as it pains me to say this as your local Number One Kung Fu Panda Fan, like........ kfp 3 is, not as good as 1 and 2....... but i am going to talk about it bc i do love kfp and i love talking abt kfp and so this falls under that lol

NOW LIKE, OBJECTIVELY, kfp 3 is still a great movie. it is still such a good movie especially compared to animation in recent years.

it’s just that like, kung fu panda 1 and 2 were just, SO good, they set the bar so high, so when the third movie was an objectively good movie it just... wasn’t as good as its predecessors

and i think it can really be boiled down to two things: the music and the villain, two things the kfp movies are renowned for

a lot of people point to the comedy as the reason for this movie’s downfall, and while that contributes to it i don’t think it, was the downfall? all the kung fu panda movies are kids movies with lots of comedy, even in kfp2 which was the darkest of the three. 3 definitely had a lot more comedy than 1 and 2 though, and that’s not inherently bad? it’s just that i think it was applied in the wrong places

which brings me back to... the villain.

so, kfp 1 and 2 had absolutely iconic villains. tai lung, the foreboding snow leopard who was shifu’s adoptive son and former student. he was raised with the belief that he would be named the dragon warrior, so when the moment came, and he wasnt.... well, he snapped, violently, and had to be locked away in prison for decades. he was put in a massive prison where he was the sole prisoner, guarded by 1000 soldiers, and he managed to escape with one (1) duck feather. he is violent and frightening, and ultimately he is a foil to po. while he seems like a stereotypical WAH EVIL NO REMORSE >:3 villain, he is honestly.. so much deeper than that? like his mere existence poses so many interesting questions in regards to po, his foil, and even shifu, and when you think about it its like, YEAH tai lung was evil for going around and killing people because he didnt get what he wanted BUT LIKE, he was literally raised with the belief that he would become the dragon warrior. his entire life was dedicated to that. it’s like, gifted kid syndrome but 100% worse. genuinely, what the fuck do you do with yourself when you dedicate your entire life towards something only for it to be like, oh sorry lol not you, at the last minute? especially when it was your own damn father who drilled that belief into you? his anger is absolutely justified. the only reason tai lung is a villain is just that he channeled that anger into like, homicide. his actions are not justifiable but his motives are honestly 10000% understandable and it makes him such an interesting character when you look beyond the typical smirking antagonist who kills people for fun exterior lol. and then juxtapose that with po? tai lung was raised to believe he would be the dragon warrior, meanwhile po, once named dragon warrior ~by accident~ was faced with opposition at every god damn turn. literally no one, not even himself, believed he was the dragon warrior. and beyond the character foil thing, it’s like, the way tai lung escaped from prison and how all his actions really play into that movie’s major theme of how In Trying To Escape Your Destiny, You Ultimately Fulfill it, it’s just. god it’s so good. he’s such a good villain

AND THEN kfp 2 had shen, a white peacock who, honestly, IS the villain that tai lung is often perceived to be. he had loving parents but he didnt get what he wanted so he threw a hissy fit and committed genocide. his motives are a lot weaker, but he makes up for it in sheer presence. who thought a peacock would ever be threatening or a serious villain? YET HE IS!!!!! his presence is just so big and evil... the voice actor does a great job in making him sound so shrill and bird-like as well and its like, wow that peacock voice is actually EERIE? and just, overall, the fact he’s a peacock is such a good character design. his character design and overall presence is much better than tai lung, who’s literally just like, a normal uhm “person” for this universe. shen poses a much more personal threat to po as well - honestly, physically, po and the furious five probably could’ve taken him down earlier in the movie. tai lung was more of a physical threat, but shen? well shen does pose a much bigger physical threat as well since he has his cannons, but his main power is that he’s a PSYCHOLOGICAL threat. this is the second movie, po’s had training, he’s friends with the furious five so he has them fighting alongside him, he’s secure in the belief that he is the dragon warrior and he’s confident he can take any threat. yet, shen is still a major threat - specifically, to po. i mentioned shen committed genocide? yeah, well a fortune teller foretold that a panda would be shen’s downfall, so to prevent his downfall! shen killed all the pandas. po managed to survive because his mother hid him away in the valley of peace, where he was raised by ping. po was a baby at that time, he has no memories of this.... at least, until he meets shen, and the PEACOCK PATTERN on his FEATHERS reminds po of that Fateful night (once again, who knew a peacock could be so threatening!!!!!). and po, in his flashback, cannot fight back. that’s where shen gets his power - he holds the answers to po’s past, he’s the source of all his repressed trauma. shen is a more frightening antagonist than tai lung because he holds such personal power over po. what shen doesnt have in interesting character motives, he more than makes up for in his sheer presence!!! and AGAIN, his arc ties into that overarching theme of you fulfilling your destiny in an effort to avoid it - shen killed the pandas so that no panda could bring him down, but in doing so he indirectly brought po to the valley of peace, so that po could become the dragon warrior, and thus defeat him!!!!

now....... kai in kfp3?? where do i even begin...........

okay. so. kai has i think probably the best design of all the villains. he’s got such an imposing stature, he’s even taller than tai lung, and his HORNS! very intimidating. and his whole blue/green color scheme is very sinister and adds such a cool fucking atmosphere. his chi powers are also cool and all that spirit world stuff

onto kai’s role in the narrative........... so, kai poses no personal threat to po. shen was the most personal of them, with tai lung being more general (his main threat was that oh no he’s gonna rampage the valley of peace again!) but ultimately even he still posed a more personal threat to po, in that tai lung wanted to be the dragon god damn warrior and po was in his way. but what beef does kai have with po?? lmfao . his most personal tie with po is that, before the panda genocide, the pandas taught kai and oogway how to use chi

his beef was with oogway. and we don’t ever really get to explore his relationship with oogway because well, oogway’s gone, so their relationship is being narrated to us in the future, far far removed. his character motivations are so weak. like, he was ~brothers in arms~ with oogway, and yet when kai gets a whiff of power he just, instantly turns on oogway?? instantly? and oogway barely has any qualms with sending his best friend to the spirit world? like wheres the TENSION wheres the CONFLICT where is the EMOTIONAL DRAMA... nevermind how like, little i care about ~villain is power hungry~ sorta deal... at least with tai lung wanting to be dragon warrior, he did that because his entire sense of self had depended on that. but kai? literally some nice pandas teach him a new power and he’s instantly like OH I HAVE TO USE IT TO KILL PEOPLE like where did that come from??? and when his friend is like HI MAYBE DONT KILL PEOPLE ? he wants to abuse this brand new power THAT badly that he’d turn on his best friend with no hesitation??

this literally just came to me so idk if its a good idea lol but like i think it’d be really interesting if somehow there was? some sort of corrupting power? so that when he learned chi it kinda forced him to abuse it. like the sheer intensity of how fucking wild he got the instant he learned chi is just like, thats not normal bro . plus this movie’s already pretty supernatural so like, maybe there’s something beyond his control that’s making him do this. like, like think of the mind stone in avengers 1, how loki was using it to control everyone. everyone retained their personalities and abilities but ultimately were following loki’s orders. so like, something like that controlling him. it would make him a more interesting character imo and also make the whole conflict with oogway kinda heart breaking cause here his friend isnt in control of himself, and he still has to put him in the spirit world because regardless, kai is a menace. overall it would heighten the emotional intensity and appeal i think. and also it would play really nicely into this movie’s pattern of “not being in control of yourself” a la the jade zombies stuff. and how ironic would it be if kai played puppetmaster while he himself was being controlled.. lol

and then, not only is kai just kinda a flat character period, then his narrative role as a villain is undermined? like his character design and overall presence is on the same fuckin level as shen like he is SO intimidating and they could absolutely play that up.... but then. the comedy. here’s what i was talking about with the comedy being applied poorly. because kai is simultaneously a major fucking threat who is terrorizing all of china, yet whenever he’s actually on screen no characters take him seriously? especially po and the pandas. like the part where kai was slowly uhm Killing for lack of a better word all of the kung fu masters in china and all the names just keep piling up and up until the realization that the jade palace is the last stronghold left to stop him.. that shit is so eerie . it is so eerie. and kai LITERALLY DESTROYED THE JADE PALACE LIKE IT WAS NOTHING. HE SMASHED IT TO SMITHEREENS. the look of HORROR on tigress’s face during that, the fact the oogway statue was the thing used to destroy the jade palace, the poetic cinema of that, the irony, oh my god....... it was such a gut wrenching scene. and kai is such a major villain there, you HAVE to take him seriously. but then when he gets to the panda village? he fucking monologues. and po is like “stop with the chit chat” and just generally undermining him and its to the point where like, would it be better to let kai monologue or have po not take him seriously? either decision sucks because its either the audience realizing its stupid, or its having the movie be self referential and say oh yeah we know its stupid, but by doing that then you’re saying that the villain is stupid and not to be taken seriously? and then the major fight scene with kai attacking the village, the pandas were having fun just fucking around with the jade zombies, nobody looked like they were fighting for their god damn lives?? yeah i know the point was that like oh you dont need to be a master of formal kung fu, we got this bros, we can win by just being ourselves, but LIKE? they could also still be scared for their lives??? they could still fight him like pandas but still take it seriously? because if they lost, not only would THEY die, but they are the LAST STAND against kai so all of china would be FUCKED if they were defeated!! and yet everybodys laughing and having fun during it?!?! like the stakes are set SO high and yet nobody actually acts like the stakes are high and ultimately kai as a villain is just undermined by the narrative and its so underwhelming compared to how seriously the previous 2 villains were taken and how good they were at being villains because of it....

anyway ive already been writing this for 40 minutes and im losing steam so im gonna briefly touch upon the music now.. i dont think the music is as glaring an error as kai was, but i think it contributes to it.

idk, the music in 3 just doesn’t feel as authentically Kung Fu Panda as the previous 2 movies. i think the most shocking thing was that oogway’s legacy had a fucking PIANO in it?!!?! A PIANO? i think thats the ONLY instance a piano has ever been used in this entire franchise and its genuinely just so... wrong... like it sounds good but it’s just!! oogway’s theme has always been in traditional string instruments and so to hear it in this stripped piano is just, it doesnt feel like a real part of the kfp soundtrack

and 1 and 2 reused a lot of the same musical themes while still being unique on their own, yet kfp 3 literally only ever uses oogway’s theme, and that’s at the very beginning in the one song oogway’s legacy. maybe it uses a few other previous themes but theyre used very sparingly to the point where i wouldnt be able to tell you what or when. without those overarching musical themes it just doesnt feel like an authentic kung fu panda soundtrack!!! idk its just ..... maybe this is a nit pick im making because i’ve listened to the 1 and 2 soundtracks religiously for years but it’s something i noticed and it’s a reason why i can’t really listen to 3′s soundtrack as much lol

also. kai’s theme is so good and it also contributes to that intimidating presence he has. it’s so good

BUT ALSO IT IS ? LITERALLY THE MELODY FROM IM SO SORRY BY IMAGINE DRAGONS. and it was intentionally taken from that song, it’s credited in the end credits. which also serves to make this feel not authentically kung fu panda because all the other villains had their own original themes meanwhile kai its like, yes its a good theme but it just isnt ? kung fu panda??

AND IF THEYRE GONNA SAMPLE A POP SONG FOR HIS THEME THEN LIKE. CAN THERE BE A NARRATIVE REASON FOR IT? like genuinely why the fuck was this song used. i try to wrack my brain as to why im so sorry was used nd it gives me cool ideas on how to flesh kai out as a character but those ideas just arent supported in canon so its like ??!?!?!?!?!

like again going back to that He’s Being Controlled idea, i think it would be so cool to communicate that subconsciously through this song. the reason they’d sample it is because it is a popular pop song so we all know that it goes IM SO SORRY in the main line, so having our brains fill that in... and it’d be like how subconsciously he’s still there inside and being control, meanwhile on the outside he shows no remorse and actually seems to be enjoying it and is overall just a fucking menace but there, inside! we get a brief glimpse of whats going on inside through this song!!

BUT LIKe. THATS NOT CANON? HE’S NOT BEING CONTROLLED IN CANON. AND HE SHOWS NO REMORSE FOR HS ACTIONS SO WHY IS HIS MAIN THEME SAMPLED FROM A SONG CALLED IM SO SORRY??!?!?!?

anyway im really out of steam now its been 50 minutes and i think i’ve touched upon everything i wanted to talk about.... again, this isnt to say kfp 3 is a bad movie its just that, these are the reasons why i think it’s the weakest of the franchise. it’s by no means a bad movie its just, in comparison to the perfection that kfp 1 and 2 are its just, kinda lackluster. but remove that comparison and it’s like oh fuck yeah this is a good movie. its just, frustrating, because we know how good 1 and 2 are and its like, 3 couldve been so much more bro....... but that frustration comes from a place of Love

anyway . watch all 3 kung fu panda movies now

- your local Kung Fu Panda enthusiast

#THIS IS ALMOST 3K WORDS IM GONNA FUCKING DIE #brot posts

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a-merman-not-a-guppy · 4 years

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Special Kind of Normal | A Soft Laugh

Finn goes to Sindri and Olaf about his anxiety over kissing.

@huldufolk-hjarn @olaf-likeswarmhugs

Finn: hi Finn: um octopus friend? Finn: wait thisi s digjds Finn: how are you? Sindri: hi finn :) I'm okay how are you? Finn: um okay Finn: nemo said you give good advice? Finn: and i Finn: i know i bothered you once and i don't wanna bother you Finn: but i ah Sindri: youre not bothering me Sindri: nemo has too much faith in me maybe though haha Finn: no! Finn: he knows you're great! Finn: but i um i just. this is embarrassing Finn: my friend asked me if i liked kissing boys and so i've kind of been freaking out because Finn: i mean do i look like i kiss boys? do i look gay? or i mean even beyond that Finn: idk if kissing is good? or what i want? i could but also Finn: i'm really confused i feel like i should be kissing people? Sindri: wow um Sindri: first of all dont freak out Sindri: I think kissing and liking people and stuff like that can be super complicated and there isnt really a right way to do it you know? I didnt really like kissing people at all either and like I didnt really think about it that much until people started asking me stuff like that Sindri: and then I kissed this girl but it wasnt great and I think I mostly did it bc i thought i was supposed to but that's a bad reason Sindri: um and then I liked olaf a lot which was also kind of a different thing but what I'm trying to say I guess is dont feel like u have to kiss people or even want to kiss people Sindri: also the whole gay straight thing and how u look one way or the other is really kind of stupis Sindri: humans are so weird Sindri: I wear glitter sometimes and I've been asked if I was gay but really who cares Sindri: its pretty Finn: it's too late i am definitely freaking out but it's just it's like Finn: it feels like there's something wrong with me that i don't like someone or want to kiss someone or whatever? like Finn: people talk about who kissed who and who's dating who but Finn: i'm over here looking at my art and wondering if the color scheme is satisfying yet Finn: and i feel like i must be weird. and i don't want to be weird or more different Finn: people already HATE me i dsiojhdngf Finn: i don't wanna be weird sindri Sindri: is it okay if I add olaf to this conversation Sindri: I think he might be able to help a lot Sindri: also people dont hate you Finn: sure? why not Finn: i'm already so embarrassed i want to cry Finn: but they do though. they already hate my stutter Sindri adds Olaf to the conversation Sindri: honestly that's so mean and there's nothing wrong with u finn Sindri: hi olaf Sindri: um so finn was telling me about some stuff and I really think you might be able to make him feel better because he is not sure how he feels about kissing people and stuff and I told him it's okay if he doesnt want to or feel ready but I just think you're better at words than me and also that you sort of know about this stuff Finn: hello olaf! ha Finn: this is awkward. i feel really it's not i mean it is a big deal but maybe i'm Finn: overthinking it a lot Finn: i get really anxious about lots of stuff but i didn't want kissing to be on the list of anxieties Olaf: oh icicles that is super relatable Olaf: it is on my list of anxieties already though!! haha Olaf: though it's not so much kissing as people wanting to kiss me I suppose. because yeah, i always felt like people were way faster than I ever was Finn: is it normal to feel like it's too fast? idk i mean i don't like anyone but i feel like everyone likes people and like i'm the turtle in a race i didn't know i was in? Finn: is it a turtle or a tortoise in the story? idk. i like turtles Olaf: it was normal for me! i still feel that way honestly and I'm several years older than you Finn: oh. okay. that's good. i mean Finn: not good you feel like you're you know, but it's normal? Olaf: hmm i think normal is an overrated word. i dont know if it exists. because even people who are kissing are doing it for their own reasons and liking it for different things. so even then, it's not like there is one answer. at least from what ive learned Olaf: though its really nice hearing that you feel that way too! it's like we're our own special kind of normal! (◠﹏◠✿) Finn: oh no i'm gonna cry. not that that's unusual for me hahaha Finn: it's nice not to feel alone? because it felt really strange. it feels strange. why don't people just want to do art? or photography? Olaf: or read books!! Finn: yes! Olaf: OR GOOGLING Olaf: I told Sindri the other day that Googling is my new hobby. I'm a Googler hehe Finn: hehehe did you google anything interesting? Finn: you should google turtles. they're so cute. or octopus Finn:

Finn: he cute! Olaf: WOW thats amazing O.O Olaf: I've never seen anything like that! Finn: really? Olaf: yeah, not at all! I've mostly been Googling about Renter's Insurance. ^.^ Finn: that sounds like the most boring way to google D=

Olaf: and the other day i was Googling recipes for a crock pots! Olaf: and then also Googling and reading reviews about crock pots! Finn: oo you cook? Olaf: Well, Sindri and I are in the market for adopting a crock pot so hehe Olaf: which isnt really cooking from what I understand. It's a pot giving your food a warm hug for many hours Olaf: But I DO love cooking 😃 Finn: that's such a fun way to talk about crock pots! Finn: i like it too! and baking <3 Finn: cakes are really fun to make Finn: and you can decorate them so it's like Finn: food and art Olaf: oooo yeah i love decorating cakes too! i once helped out at a few dances in the hollow Finn: really? that sounds like fun! Finn: maybe we could decorate a cake sometime Finn: or no that sounds dumb wait haha Finn: you could also meet my dog he's very cute Olaf: why does that sound dumb!! we can make it a special friendship cake 🙂 Olaf: dont you think more people should have cake for reasons like that? so silly that we wait for special occasions Finn: Oh. Yes please! <3 Finn: i definitely think so. friendship cake sounds like the very best kind of cake Finn: i'll try to decorate it with all the friends i've made this year Olaf: OH thats so fun! Olaf: have you heard of cupcakes?? you could have a friend cupcake decorating party Finn: i have 😃 cupcakes are amazing! Finn: i'd have to find a cupcake tin but that also sounds like a lot of fun

#huldufolk-hjarn #olaf-likeswarmhugs #t: special kind of normal #r: a soft laugh #r: finndri #r: laffin #ugh this really #they get to me

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georgialouisea · 5 years

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Meant To Be - Part 9

Pairing - Jared x Reader, Jensen x Sister Reader. Word count -1079 Warnings - Fluff, swearing.

Part 8 - Masterlist

Life in Vancouver was amazing, life with Jared was beyond amazing.

Ever since you were little you’d hated being the one singled out, you hated being the new girl, moving school or getting a new job was your idea of hell. The girls at supernatural made you feel at home, they were honestly the nicest girls you’d ever met, they didn’t seem to care that your brother was one of the stars of the show.

“Did you manage to get that email out?” Jo asked shutting off her computer.

“Shit no, completely forgot.”

“Want me to stay and help?” She paused at your desk on the way out.

“No, it’s fine, I have the details written down somewhere, get home to your boyfriend.”

“Don’t you have to get home to yours?” She perched on the corner of your desk smirking down at you. You’d only ever given her and Lizzie small details and they were more than intrigued.

“He’s working late today, so I’m fine, go home and enjoy your date night.”

“You sure?”

“Positive Jo, go enjoy your weekend I’ll see you on Monday.”

“Enjoy your weekend Y/N.”

“You too JO.” Watching her leave the room your attention turned back to your screen.

“Y/N/N?” Jared whispered from the doorway behind you. “You ready to go home?”

Turning to face him your eyes adjusted to the lighting change. “What?”

“You done?”

“Give me like five minutes.” Turning back to the screen you finished up the email you should’ve sent 6 hours ago, trying to ignore Jared spinning himself around in a chair behind you. “Okay done.” Shutting down your computer you could finally head home with Jared.

“Baby?” Jared mumbled as he shifted on the couch.

“Yeah?” Looking up at him he paled slightly.

He sat up straighter. “Okay, I haven’t told you this yet but on Thursday I’m gonna be on Ellen.”

“Jare that’s amazing.”

“You might not think that in a few minutes.”

“Why?”

“You love me right?” He paused, nodding in response he smiled at you. “I want to tell everyone I am in love with the most beautiful, amazing, smartest, funniest woman I know, that you’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me and I love you.”

Nodding you smiled up at him. “Okay, yeah, we’ll go official.”

“You’re sure?”

“I’m one million percent sure Padalecki.”

“Oh thank God.” His head dropped. “I thought you’d say no.”

“Why? When I love you.”

“I didn’t think you’d want people to know yet.”

“Jare, I’m tired of sneaking around trying to hide our relationship, let’s just tell everyone.”

“You’re sure?”

“So sure.” His arms wrapped around you.

“You’re happy with me announcing it on the Ellen show?”

“Yeah, I am, you have an interview and if you really want to talk about me it’s up to you.”

“I would talk about you every second of every day if I could.”

Jared’s flight back to LA was delayed due to bad weather, he’d planned to be home hours before his interview was aired. A knock at the door pulled your attention from the cereal advert, praying by some miracle it was Jared, opening the door Jensen stood in front of you.

“Why’re you here?”

“Because.” He took a step into your apartment closing the door behind himself. “I know what you’re like and as soon as people know you’re going to panic and Jared’s still in the air, so I’m here and we’re gonna watch it together.” He grabbed your hand and pulled you towards the couch.

“Mr Jared Padalecki!” Ellen introduced as the audience clapped and cheered.

Biting your lip you tried to suppress the smile as he waved at the audience.

“How are you?” Ellen asked as she sat opposite him.

“I’m great, how are you?”

Ellen nodded with a smile. “I’m good, you’re living up in Vancouver now aren’t you?”

“Yeah I am, it’s a lot colder up there than it is here in LA.”

“You’re up there filming for the new show Supernatural right?”

“Yeah.” He nodded. “I am.”

“So tell us what the show’s about.”

You watched Jared explain the premise of the show adding in little stories of his time on set with Jensen.

“Do you two get on well?”

“Yeah, we do, we’re both from Texas, we watch the same shows, listen to the same music, it’s been easy to get to know him.

“So it’s not uncomfortable playing his brother?”

“Nope, he already is like a brother to me.”

“That’s good to hear, now I have to ask, you’re a very attractive young man.” The audience whooped. “Alright.” She waved a hand trying to calm the women down as Jared chuckled. “Are you seeing anyone?”

Jared blushed, his head dropped trying to hide it. “I am actually, we’ve been together for nearly a year now, she’s amazing.”

“Will we know who she is? A fellow actor?”

“No actually she’s not an actress, she works on set behind the scene in the admin department, she’s so smart half the stuff she does I’d have no idea how to do.”

“Is she watching?”

“Yeah, she’ll be watching with Jensen.”

“Oh have they become close too?” She asked with a furrowed brow.

“No, well they’ve always been close, Y/N is Jensen’s sister.”

“Oh wow, is he okay with you dating his sister?”

“Yeah, I mean he’s said if I hurt her he’ll rip my lungs out.”

Ellen chuckled moving on with the interview.

“That wasn’t painful was it?” Jensen smiled down at you. “You okay?”

“Yeah everyone knows, everyone loves you on set this isn’t going to change anyone's opinion of you trust me.”

“I know.”

The front door opened behind you. “Hey.” Jared walked in dropping his bag by the door. “Have you seen it yet?”

“Yeah, we have.”

He walked around the couch to face you. “And are we still together?”

“Of course we are, why wouldn’t we be?” Looking up at him you punched Jensen’s thigh making him move up the couch so Jared could sit next to you.

“I haven’t seen it yet, I can’t remember what I said, I could’ve said something stupid.”

“Everything you said was perfect.”

Jared’s arm wrapped around you. “Good.” He took a shaky breath. “Good.”

“Were you actually worried that I’d leave you?”

“No.” He scoffed.

“There’s only one issue now.” Jensen sighed.

“Which is?”

“When Jared’s found with his lungs ripped out they’ll know I’ve done it.”

Part 10

Forever Taglist -

@mega-loser1298 @smalltowndivaj @roxyspearing @emoryhemsworth @dwgrl1903 @cassieraider @mirandaaustin93 @mogaruke @heyitscam99 @mouselovesmusic @supernaturaldean67 @atc74 @witchofenoch @malindacath @skathan-omaha @ain-t-bovvered @beffyblueeyes @unicorn-sparkles123 @serienjunkiegirl @jchona @polina-93 @thefangirlliveson @rhochradel @juanitadiann @amandamdiehl @dixonsunicorn @deanzeppeloin @katieelementarymydearwatsonme @atlas-of-the-world @spnbaby-67 @chelsea072498 @dean-winchesters-bacon @racheo91 @mrswhozeewhatsis @death-unbecomes-you @brewsthespirit-blog @shann-the-artist-moon @team-free-will-you-idjits-67 @claitynroberts @spnwoman @angelsandwinchesters @smoothdogsgirl @cdwmtjb8 @perkypolarbear @thisismysecrethappyplace @tatertot1097 @jessieray98 @curly-haired-disaster @gh0stgurl @starfirerules @kcrews74 @calaofnoldor @shadows-and-padlocked-hearts @screechingartisancashbailiff @malindacath @kolelondon24 @natura1phenomenon @thehufflepuffblog @lemondropirwin @babypink224221 @mariekoukie6661 @mymysosa @blackcherrywhiskey @lonely-skys @titty-teetee @foreverwayward @81mysteriouslyme @x-waywardaf-x @blueberrykushlovexoxo-blog @paintballkid711

Meant to be -

@gh0stgurl @witch-of-letters @oneshoeshort @samuelwillliamwinchester @love-nakamura @spn-obession @holylulusworld @wayward-gypsy @heythereamigodude @rainbowkisses31 @deangirl7695 @traceyaudette @winchesterprincessbride @vickiq9761 @cdwmtjb8 @samsgirl93 @love-my-not-natural-babies @gloriousartisanfancreator @me-han10 @pretty-fortune @jamielea81 @the-is13 @kit-kat-katie99 @imaginationisgrowth @bitchwhytho @deansgirl79

#glouise #Jared Padalecki #jared padalecki x reader #jared x reader #jared padalecki series #rpf supernatural #supernatural rpf #spn rpf fan fiction #spn rpf #supernatural #supernatural series #Supernatural Fan Fiction #supernatural blog

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i4z-0892-il · 5 years

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Monster House 3

Summary: Posing as Newlyweds Sam and Y/n set out to investigate what’s killing the visitors of a secluded Inn, and attempt to keep their working relationship professional.

Pairing: Sam x Reader

Word count: 6100 Oops, my keyboard slipped

Warnings: NSFW, 18+ Only, suggestive themes, language

A/N: TROPES.

Buy Sam’s Scent Here from @scentsfromthebunker (And damn does it smell goooooood)

I live for feedback, comments and reblogs! It is the fire that fuels me! The pep in my step! The Adrenaline in my veins! It is the tap of my fingers to a keyboard.

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Add yourself to my Tag List.

Masterlist stays updated with each new chapter.

Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4

After following the main trail for nearly half a mile it was quickly decided that the most effective course of action would be to get off the path. Neither of you were exactly sure what you were looking for, but you could both agree that whatever it was you weren’t going to find it sitting like a silver platter on a main path. However, actually stepping off of it and wandering aimlessly through the dense forest surrounding you was another matter. There shouldn’t have been a reason to worry, after all you were in the company of Sam Winchester, one of the deadliest hunters alive. If anyone should have been worried it should be whatever you were hunting. Even still the chill that slid up your spine earlier never really faded away.

Realistically that unsettled feeling could have been a number of things. You were nervous. Even though you wanted to find the thing that was snatching bodies, you also really didn’t want to find the thing that was snatching bodies. The classic double-edged sword! If you find it you could stop it and kill it, or it could stop and kill you- always a gamble. And you did not like that shit at all. Dense wilderness also put you on edge, but that was from growing up in West Virginia where there was more forest than not, and from knowing exactly what was out there.

Certain parts of the wild should not be visited. Of that you were sure, beyond shadow of a doubt.

Since you could remember you were told to stay away from specific parts of the forests surrounding the tiny town tucked in the mountains where you grew up in. Everyone knew. No one talked about it, but everyone knew. The Wilderness to the North-West was home to something far older and more dangerous than any gun in that town.

There were rules everyone knew to abide by. And only the very stupid or very foolish chose not to listen.

Don’t go into the woods at night.

Never give out your real name- or anyone’s.

If you feel you’re being watched stay calm and get out without a fuss.

Take nothing from the forest because it will want it back.

When you see the fog, leave.

Don’t listen to the whispers, ignore the strange knockings.

Close the doors and windows, and don’t look outside.

If something is following you don’t ever turn around.

In your youth you were both stupid and foolish.

The rules your father tried to drill into your thick skull never stopped you from playing in the forbidden woods. When you were little you’d run through those trees like it was your own personal playground, it was magical and enchanted and it was all yours. Everywhere you stepped in those woods was warm and inviting, like a little bubble of safety all around you. You talked to the trees, and though they never talked back you felt loved and safe.

Until you got older. Sometimes it was inviting like it was when you were just a kid, other times it was warning you to stay away.

It was September and you were fifteen when it happened- when it turned on you. Walking home from school you cut through the trees. You knew that forest like the back of your hand and the idea of shaving nearly twenty minutes off of your walk was just a little too tempting. It was still warm, and everything was golden with that afternoon hue, just before the sun starts to set, and you weren’t afraid. You were just over half way home when the shift happened. That sudden change in the air that made you stop, body frozen on the spot. The air around you dropping to a temperature so cold you could see the puffs of air coming from your mouth. Everything darkened like the sun had disappeared, but dusk wasn’t for another two hours, and it seemed like the treetops had closed the holes in the canopy trapping you and claustrophobic.

Something felt wrong, terribly, terribly wrong.

Heeding the words of your father you forced your legs to move, to carry on your way. Don’t run, don’t panic, don’t be afraid. So you kept your head down, looked straight ahead, and kept going. It wasn’t long before you felt like you weren’t the only one in the woods. And up slithered that cold, creeping hand of fear gripping the back of your neck at the base of your skull, wrapping around your chest like a spider-web making your whole body vibrate in alarm. Your pace sped up as you tried to keep your breath from shaking; as you tried to keep the panic and dread that filled you from your head to your toes at bay.

The thudding of your heart all but stopped when you glanced up and realized you had no idea where you were. It was like you had run straight into a wall of Evergreen or the trees had uprooted themselves and moved just to throw you off. You knew those woods, there was no way you could have gotten lost on a path you had walked more than a thousand times.Yet there you were, standing somewhere that seemed foreign and hostile. Swallowing down the blooming anxiety stuck in your throat you willed yourself to keep moving remembering not to stay still for too long.

Thick rolling fog slid in along the sides of your vision appearing from nowhere and suddenly everywhere. It reached for you with wispy smoke-like tendrils threatening to snag your ankles if you weren’t quick enough. It whispered your name, your name which you had so ignorantly given in your youth. Your heart raced in your chest, blood pumping furiously with adrenaline. Lungs sucked in short, sharp shocks of air as you tried to remain calm to the best of your ability, but you were only holding on by a thread.

When you felt eyes on you it was your undoing. Overcome with dread and fright you took off as fast as your feet could carry you. And the wilderness did not like that. Tearing through the trees they tried to reach out with sharp branches snagging your clothes, and slicing fine lines in your face. But you didn’t slow down, you couldn’t slow down.

It was coming.

It was gaining on you.

The Thing in the Woods.

Your heavy backpack full of school books, binders and papers slowed you down. Without second thought you dropped the dead weight, praying to God or whatever was out there that you made it out alive.

The forest moved, uplifting a root and grabbing your foot taking you to the ground tearing holes in the knees of your jeans, scraping up your hands and splitting your cheek open on a rock beneath you. It didn’t give you pause though, in full flight or fight mode you scrambled to your feet kicking up a flurry of dead leaves as you did. The snapping of branches and footsteps behind you dropped your heart into the pit of your stomach, your nervous system short circuiting as every fiber of your being turned to stone.

Everything fell deathly silent, no rustling of leaves, no wind, no birds or insects. Just the sound of blood pumping in your ears and your ragged breath coming out in wisps of cold mist.

Every limb trembled, quaking with terror as you did what you could to swallow down your panic and turn your head in slow trepidation knowing you had broken nearly every cardinal rule. Dragging your eyes along the forest floor you turned them up and a silent scream caught in your throat.

“Hey, Earth to Y/n-” Sam said waving a hand in front of your face, snapping you from your trance. Like a deer in the headlights your attention was on him, he was looking at you curious and concerned. “You okay?”

“Yeah. Yeah, I’m good.” You answered shrugging off your discomfort. Shifting your weight from foot to foot, flustered under the scrutiny of his unsatisfied gaze, you turned your eyes anywhere but his face. Those damn hazel eyes would be the end of you, and you couldn’t stand him staring at you like he genuinely cared for too long. Only after you took a long look around did you realize that you had no idea where you were or for how long you’d been following behind Sam. You blamed it on the woods, they played tricks and you hadn’t been much of a hiker since your youth.

“So I think I saw a house or something just up ahead.” He continued, dropping the fact that you were so very obviously not good. That you hadn’t cracked a joke or made a comment you surely thought was witty for nearly fifteen minutes was clue enough but the spaced out, thousand yard stare plastered on your face sealed the deal. He wasn’t one to push, and you weren’t one to tell, you’d come around when and if you were ready. Even still it was a look he hadn’t seen before.

“Okay, lets go do a B and E.” You agreed with a clap before sweeping your arms to the side in a grand gesture. “After you good Sir.”

Sam scoffed and shook his head walking past you with an eye roll.

“You better be careful rolling them things that hard Sam.” You warned as you followed behind him. He turned his head, confusion creasing his brow. “You’re gonna roll ‘em so far into your head they’ll get stuck like that.”

That pulled a laugh from him, and those dimples you loved so much. You always liked to see him smile, and his laugh seemed to happen so rarely. So when he did it was like looking at the sun, radiant and warm, bringing life to all things.

He wasn’t kidding when he said he saw a house. Although “house” was a rather gracious term for what it was. It looked more like an old hunting cabin that had seen better days, held together by antique nails and the grace of god.

“Wow, this place is a dump.” You said stepping around him and into the small clearing to take in the sight fully, the fact that it was still standing on its own was impressive.

“Really? You don’t want to honeymoon here?” Sam asked as he dropped the strap of his backpack to his hand and knelt to unzip it. You stood with your hands at your hips studying the building that would surely crumble if someone looked at it the wrong way. After a short pause you turned your attention back to him.

“I thought about it, and no. I do not want to honeymoon here. As much fun as tetanus is- I think I’d rather not.” You stated. The corner of his lips pulled up as he grinned at you while extending a handful of silver bullets and a holster. He and Dean might have been content with tucking a loaded gun in the waistband of their jeans- but you were not. You knew how getting shot felt and you were not exactly the most graceful person on the planet either. The combination of the two was a recipe for disaster, and you were not trying to shoot yourself in the ass. It was a nice ass, you had full intention on keeping it that way. Strapping the holster around your thigh and snagging a silver blade from his small arsenal almost instantly made you feel better. Sam geared up and slung the bag over his shoulder again before standing and sweeping hair from his face.

“I don’t know. Clean it up a little, could be nice.”

“I somehow doubt that.”

“Yout sure? Hang some curtains over the boarded up windows there,” he said pointing to different areas on the house. “A porch swing there. And one of those little welcome mat’s that says ‘Leave’ at the door.”

Hand over your heart you turned charmed eyes up to him, sighing dreamily. “You’re right, it’s like a dream.”

“I knew you’d come around.”

“Oh, yeah Sam, let's build a summer home out of the cabin that’s at the epicenter of every single 80’s horror movie.” You snarked, nudging his arm with your elbow. “Maybe if we’re lucky a portal to hell will open in the basement on nights when the stars align.”

“You know that is exactly how lucky we are.” Sam stated with another laugh, and it cured your depression, acne, and alcoholism all at once.

“Alright, call the realtor. Make ‘em an offer they can’t refuse.”

From about a hundred feet back the place certainly looked abandoned enough. Boards covered nearly every window, most of which were missing entire panes of glass either broken in or fallen out. And it was in serious need of a new paint job, and probably an exterminator- there was no way termites hadn’t taken up residence. Thinking about bugs slowly eating away the foundation of an entire house might not have been the best way to calm your nerves, but it was a better alternative to what you were most assuredly going to find.

The heavy duty padlock and iron chain around the front door did nothing but confirm your suspicions. It was never as easy an explanation as say- a tool shed! No. It was never a fucking tool shed. It was always a house of horrors. Body parts stuffed into jars. Body parts sans the jars. Always body parts. You should have picked a better- less morbid profession.

“Think you can crack it?” You asked, obviously he could. It was dumb to even ask, but Sam gave pause to ponder anyway. He scanned the area, then back to the lock, weighing options.

“Maybe. You go left, I’ll go right, see if we can find a more subtle way in.” He answered finally. Nodding in agreement you walked along the wall looking for a point of access that wouldn’t be so obvious that someone had gone inside. Because that’s exactly what you needed, pick the lock, go in, monster-person-thing comes back to find the chain missing right off the front door. Good point Sam.

More boarded up windows, and fragile wall you might have been able to put a fist clean through if you were curious enough. And jesus fuck if you were not curious. Putting a hand on the wall you gave a little push, and there was enough give that it only granted credibility to your theory, and a little more excitement than maybe was healthy. But who didn’t want to just full on kick in a fucking wall? Crazy people. That’s who. Though that would have been arguably way less subtle than just cracking open the padlock. The argument being the cabin was falling apart anyway. The human foot sized hole would have been slightly more difficult to explain, so you tucked the urge away in the back of your mind. Begrudgingly.

Carrying on you reached a cellar door, and a set of tiny windows lining the bottom of the cabin, one of them was busted nearly completely open. Yahtzee. With a quick chirping whistle you drew Sam’s attention who rounded the corner of the house to meet you. A casual toss of your head to the side let his eyes trail to the window you were looking at.

“There’s no way I’ll fit in that, I’m way too big.” He commented without missing a beat. You snorted a laugh, biting the inside of your lips into a flat line, closing your eyes and shaking your head. How many times had he said that in his life? When you regained more control of your face and opened your eyes again he was looking at you with that perfected bitch-face, which while oh-so-judgy was still pretty damn hot. You shrugged, proclaiming your innocence.

“What? I didn’t say anything!”

He didn’t have to respond, it was clear as day what you were thinking. He moved to the cellar doors, like a normal thinking person and pulled to no avail.

“Guess it’s locked from the inside there Buckaroo.” You said peering over his shoulder, his eyes cut to you, there was that bitch-face again. With a huff he stood upright, you always liked standing close enough to him to really let his height sink in. Sam always made you feel so tiny and small, and little, like his huge frame could just swallow you whole. Not that you ever spent entirely too much time thinking about how easily he could crush you in his toned, muscular, perfectly sunkissed arms or anything. Or how he could lift you off your feet and over his head like you weighed absolutely nothing. Focus!

The cellar doors wouldn’t open which meant your plan was the most viable one on the table. And if Sam couldn’t fit through that little window it left one option. You were going to have to do it. A shudder of distaste and resentment snaked up your back. You were going to have to crawl through some busted ass window, in some creepy ass basement of a creepy ass cabin in the middle of some creepy ass woods. And god only knew what you might find inside- human jars, jars made from humans, blood paint. Eyeball soup. Buffalo Bill. Who the fuck knew. Suddenly your plan seemed a lot less fun than it did a minute ago.

“Okay, welp. Guess I’m going in.” You said shaking the jitters out of your body through your hands. Sam would never tell you that he enjoyed watching you screw your courage to the sticking place, but it was absolutely entertaining. You were kind of like a kid in a play getting ready to go deliver a monologue at the crux of the plot, who had stage fright and were bouncing up and down offstage with nervous energy. He had to hand it to you, you never backed down, and there was no denying he admired your bravery. In another life you probably would have been a Teacher or Optometrist, or some kind of niche artist. Definitely something softer, much less gritty and gory. Not that you couldn’t handle yourself, he had no doubts about you and your iron will. But if the life hadn’t found you and made the decision for you, he simply couldn’t see you as the dirt-under-the-fingernails, willingly-crawling-into-a-dingy-hole-towards-almost-certain-peril kind of gal. The sarcasm and your unabashed weirdness though? That would stay. No matter what life you wound up in, most assuredly, those two staples of you would remain. He wouldn’t have you any other way though, he loved your odd sense of humor, and eccentricities.

Crouching at the window you tilted your head at a near painful angle trying to get a better view of what you were getting yourself in to. Without asking Sam handed you a flashlight, tucking it into your hand unannounced bringing your eyes to scan him over quizzically.

“Where were you hiding that?” You certainly hadn’t seen it earlier.

“Backpack?”

“Boy scout.” You teased, because of course he would have packed for everything, he probably had a compass tucked away in there somewhere too. Sam rolled his eyes, a dimple creasing his cheek as he turned his attention back to the window.

No obvious dead bodies, so that was a plus. After shining the light around you set your mind in stone and handed it back to him so you could shimmy in through the narrow pane. There was a pretty steep drop from the window to the floor in the basement so you laid on your back, squeezing your head and shoulders through first, giving yourself a chance to grab a long wooden beam above you to hold onto for leverage, and so you didn’t drop like a rock to the floor. With a final huff you pulled the rest of your body through the open window, acutely aware of the sharp pieces of jagged glass that jabbed you with every movement. Don’t think about the spider web you just stuck your hand in. Or the other creepy crawlies lurking in the shadows just waiting to scurry over your fingers or up the leg of your jeans. And do not think about the inevitable squishing sound the floor is going to make when you step into a pile of human organs. Once in your dropped your hold and landed on your feet, kicking up a thousand years worth of dust as you did. With a hacking cough and a wave of your hand you brushed the dirt out of your face to little avail.

“Anything interesting?” Sam asked from the window, shining the flashlight directly in your eyes. Scrunching up your face you tried to block it with your hand.

“I don’t know Sam. I’m blind now, so it’s a little hard to tell.”

“Right.” He realized and reached an arm through the window handing off the light to you. Shining it around you were pleasantly surprised to find it more or less empty. Old dusty shelves lined the walls full of boxes, and tools. No mason jars full of eyeballs. Yet. Lighting up the doors to the cellar from your side you were relieved that it was just barricaded by a simple wooden beam.

Setting the light on a shelf, aiming it at the doors you went and freed the plank of wood from its slot. Sam pulled the doors open from the other side, and closed them silently behind him, taking a moment to replace the wooden board, ever careful to cover his tracks.

“Mind the dust.” You said, grabbing the flashlight from its perch. “Hey, Sam.” The second you gained his attention you flashed the beam of light in his face. “See anything?”

“Ha, ha. I get it.” He snarked snatching the torch from you hand as you stifled a giggle.

Following his lead you continued to search the basement, turning up bupkis. Nothing out of the ordinary, just a bunch of old shit that no one had probably used since the Inn was built. Save for the nice little stash of Moonshine tucked under one of the shelves.

“Yeehaw.” You said popping open the lid to the mason jar and taking a whiff, quickly turning into a sputtered cough as your eyes and throat immediately started to burn. “Good god, you could strip paint with this.”

“Yeah? Go ahead and try it, tell me what gasoline tastes like.” Sam replied with a chuckle.

“I’m not gonna drink it. You drink it.”

“No way.”

“I’ll give you five bucks if you drink it.” You insisted, there was that perfect bitch-face again.

“You’d don’t have five bucks.”

“Wow, rude. You don’t have to rub it in.” You said with a pout, screwing the lid back on the jar and tucking it back into it’s spot. Once the basement was clear you headed upstairs which was unsettling. Nothing but ratty old furnishings, more than apparent that a family had in fact lived there, but just up and left one day. Antique dolls on an old rickety shelf, children’s toys on the floor, deer heads mounted on the walls. There were still untouched plates sitting on the side table, and a book left open for place keeping. Easily the most alarming thing was the back corner which had a mess of iron chains and cuffs, and a few giant meat hooks hanging.

“Still wanna turn this place into a summer home?” He asked, the light glinting off the iron chains.

“Just remember my safeword.” You quipped, biting back a gag from the rancid smell coming from what you could only assume was at one point a kitchen. A large black mass situated in the center of the floor where the odor was coming from caught your attention, forming a pit in your stomach, and you grabbed Sam by the wrist directing the light to where you needed it.

A voice from outside distracted you from making out the shape in the floor, someone was outside. Sam cut out the light, which helped neither of you to figure out where to go from there. Hand on the grip of your gun at your thigh you waited for the inevitable stand-off as the chain on the outside of the front door rattled, lock falling away. Sam’s large hands covered your mouth and snaked around your waist as he pulled you backwards and into the crawl-space beneath the staircase. With a free hand you hooked your fingers around the frame of the slatted closet door and pulled it closed silently.

The storage area he pulled you into had to be the world’s tiniest storage space, if it were just you in there it might have been fine. But with Sam’s huge form crowding what little space was available it was awkward to say the least. The sharp incline of the stairs had his broad shoulders pressed against the flat of the ceiling, and the rest of him hunched over you practically bending you in half backwards. One hand pressed against the wall above your head, and legs at a crooked and unstable angle below you you were banking on him to keep you upright. With his arm tucked firmly at your back and his other arm outstretched to keep himself steady, hand flat against the wall behind your head it was all he could do to fit into the space with you. You were flexible enough, generally speaking, but you were not a contortionist and the Cirque du Soleil act he just crammed you into was… less than comfortable.

The front door opened and you could no longer lament about your tight quarters.

“No, I heard you.” Came a man’s voice, you tugged a finger on the slats of the door trying your damndest to sneak a peek through them, which was near impossible with Sam’s forearm against your jaw. Not that you minded so much, he was warm, and he smelled so nice it was distracting, like coffee, and vanilla, and cinnamon. He held you flush against him in a hard line down the length of his chest and abdomen, tucked between his solid thighs. Made you all tingly in the nether region, but there was no time for you to focus on his firm he was. Or the feel of his breath hot against your neck forming goosebumps on your skin. Or how the long strands of his hair tickled your cheek, and how you’d always wanted to know how soft it would feel knotted in your fingers. Or how hard your heart was pounding in your chest a little too excited to be so close to him.

“I said I heard you. It’ll be taken care of.” The Man said again, irritated. It was so dark in the cabin you couldn’t make out a thing, and you were trusting your instincts to tell you relatively where he was based on where his voice was coming from. “You just worry about your damn self, and let me do my fucking job. Or you can deal with it, but something tells me you don’t like getting your hands dirty...Yeah. That’s what I thought you’d say.”

Then there was silence, followed by a series of footsteps, heavy boots, going from the spot in the center of the room towards the kitchen. The sounds of rustling plastic, and a slow choppy drag of something weighty across the floor.

Your arm above your head was starting to cramp, and the way he had you bent backwards was already painful. Bracing yourself against the wall you twisted your body until your back was flush against his chest, careful to remain as silent as you could. Sam shifted to try to give you some room but, the poor man had nowhere to go. Under different circumstances he would not have minded your ass pressing against him in all the right places. But this was neither the time nor the place to get caught up in the scent of your shampoo, or the soft curves of your body moving against the hard lines of his. You shifted again, just trying to get a better view of what little there was to be seen through the slats in the door, but the friction of your movements was impossible to ignore. One large hand splayed out flat, low on your stomach between your hip bones keeping you still enough for him to keep his mind focused on anything other than the growing tension pooling in his core.

The feel of his hand sitting dangerously low over your jeans made heat bloom in your cheeks and elsewhere and at the moment you were grateful for the pitch black. The front door creaked open and the rustling plastic stopped long enough for it to shut again and be replaced by the sound of jingling chains and a padlock being reattached. Waiting until you were in the clear enough to make an exit from the tiny crawl-space was seemed to take forever, but at the same time it wasn’t like you were in much of a huge rush to move. After all you were a little more than content to stay exactly where you were. Sam let out a sigh, his forehead dropping to rest against the back of your neck, his warm breath sending a tingle down your spine.

“See anything?” His tone low and smooth, as if he was unbothered by the cramped quarters.

“Nothing.” There was no hiding your disappointment. The conversation you’d overheard was certainly of interest however. Pushing the door open you slipped out of the crawl-space. The drag of his long fingers over the bare skin peeking between the rise of your jeans and hem of your t-shirt sending sparks of electricity directly to your center. Sam stepped out behind you, having to adjust himself in his jeans, he could think more about the feel of holding you that close later, and he would be.

The flashlight clicked on and both of you moved directly to the kitchen which yielded- nothing.

Swatting your hands against your thighs in frustration you let out an irritated groan. The sink was backed up with blackwater, and the floor was mushy from water damage sourced from a hole in the ceiling. But there were no body parts. The lack thereof was starting to bother you, which was not a feeling you’d thought to anticipate. No one wanted to find human remains, but more than anything you just wanted to find some fucking human remains! Gank the bad guy, stop the killings, go home, take a hot bath and boom. You would be on your way to Netflix and sleep. But no! Of course it wasn’t that simple.

Upstairs was equally unfruitful. Although an unmade and dingy bed, along with some foul smelling clothes was more proof than needed that someone was living there still. Your money was on the guy you’d just heard downstairs.

The only problem left was how to get back out of the house without letting it be known they had been there. Someone would have to put the wooden board back in the cellar door-you. But you also weren’t quite tall enough to climb back through the window in the basement. There was, however, a wide open window in the bedroom, and Sam beat you to it.

“Ever thought about jumping out a window?”

“You read my mind.” You answered unenthusiastically. He pressed his forearm against the frame gauging just how far down the drop would be, deciding it was plenty safe. But you did not agree. “You’re kidding right?”

“It’s not that far.” He justified, but you were not having it. A twenty foot drop might not have seemed like much for him, but that extra foot he had on you made a hell of a difference. Not to mention the fact that he was a large wall of solid muscle, while you were small, soft and had squishy insides.

“Okay, sure- for you maybe, Gigantor. I jump down there I’m looking at a broken leg, or worse.”

“You’re not going to break your leg.” Sam reassured you, but the flat and unamused expression on your face was not something he’d be able to cut through that easily. A large hand slid along your jawline, warm and comforting. “I’ll catch you.”

You could have melted into a puddle on the spot. It really wouldn’t have taken anything more than a slight breeze to make your knees crumple beneath you. The genuine sweetness in his eyes made you forget how to breathe. Trying to get a handle on yourself, unless you drowned in those kaleidoscope eyes you scoffed. “Yeah right.”

“I promise.” He said, gaze intense and confident. Beyond shadow of a doubt you trusted him, you were sure you were also going to regret it, but you were about to find out.

“Okay.” You agreed, a little baffled that you were just going to jump out a window and trust him to break your fall. He turned to go out first, but you grabbed his arm, bringing his attention back to you, all nerves again. “Sam. You drop me and I swear once I’m out of the hospital you’re in for a world of hurt.”

Sam flashed you a dimpled smile and dropped out the window, landing on his feet, making it look easy. Of course, he always made it look easy. He was graceful and agile, like a cat. You on the other hand- not so much. You sucked in a breath and leaned out the window waiting for him to ready himself. It wasn’t the first window you’d jumped out of, not by a long shot. But any other time you were escaping with zero hesitation about what was on the other side, no time to think about it. Quick thinking jump, or die, so there was little room to question the best alternative. But you kind of just wanted to try to boost yourself through the window in the basement right about then.

“This is so stupid.” You hushed, rocking on your heels. He turned up to you, arms outstretched. Sucking in a breath you hoped you aimed right, and stepped out the window, slamming your eyes shut and bracing yourself for impact.

Impact came but it wasn’t you busting your ass on solid ground. Sam made good on his word and caught you, but you had a little thing called momentum and just kept going, practically tackling him to the floor below. He hit the dirt on his back, his arms wrapped firm around you. Eyes wide you sat up immediately, waiting for the inevitable ‘Oh god, I think you broke my rib!’ to come but he just laid out for a moment, and brought two thumbs up, head tipped back to catch the breath you surely knocked out of him.

“Hey, this was your idea.” You defended. He nodded with an exasperated grin, hands falling to rest high on your thighs where you straddled his waist. It didn’t take but a split second for you to relish the position you’d found yourself in, and took only another split second more for the wave of embarrassment to flood, as you scrambled to your feet. Not that you wouldn’t have minded staying perched on his hips a little longer, or much longer. But it was Sam, and you already shouldn’t have been thinking about him like that, and you were also a professional with a job to do, which meant you didn’t have time to wrap your brain in fantasies. No matter how mouth-wateringly tantalizing they were.

He took your outstretched hand to help him to his feet, and dusted off the foliage he picked up. When you turned away to look at your surroundings he took a moment to adjust himself once again. That was twice now he’d had you exactly where he’d wanted you, at exactly the wrong times.

Heavy fog began to roll in through the trees, and with it that sickening cold chill rolled up your spine, and you found yourself edging just a little closer to him.

“It’ll be dark soon. We should get back to the Inn.” You suggested, but it was more of a warning. The woods were telling you to get out, and you weren’t one to ignore the signs anymore.

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hugsfromdad · 5 years

Text

Um... Well... THAT happened. holy shit. Let me tell you about my night. (Ya bisexual boi got his flirting mojo back but now idk what to do)

(This is a long story, but worth it. my theater crush comes in at the end fyi for those keeping up with me)

So, opening night of this play i've been working on just happened.

(Reminder: this is my first play ever)

And, it was beyond incredible. I had nothing to compare it to, but literally everyone was freaking out because of how good it apparently was.

....also apparently I was all everyone could talk about.

We had a theater critic there who was(is) gonna write us a review, and everyone was stressed about what he was gonna think (except me cause I had no idea if that was important. I guess it was)

WELL, I was pulled aside afterwards by both our director, and the mother of a cast member to tell me that not only did the critic love it, but he loved me. He said this was the best show he has ever seen at that theater...and he's directed shows there before! But I was being told that he loved me...so yeah, i really didn't know what to do with that but I guess it's really great

I have one of the 2 slow songs, and I have a riff near the end of mine. Well, I turned the riff into me holding a note for a long ass time. Like, the longest I've ever held a note. And then, to top it off, I hit a really high note at the very end.

Everyone fucking loved it. They positively freaked out and it was, again, so overwhelming. I didnt know what to do with it or how to react.

After the show, the cast and their families, friends, and as much of the audience who wanted, went to a restaurant/pub down the road that was staying open late soley for us. Dude, there was a big crowd.

I had been talking to my director with my mother right after the show and before we went over, and he could not shut up about people's reaction to me. It was overwhelming. He kept telling me about all these important people who had loved me and wanted to know about me and were freaking out when he told them it was my first show. A couple other cast memebers also came over and were talking with us and my mum and they kept complimenting and praising me and I genuinely didnt know what to do with it.

So we go to the pub and I start to like hang out and then--

Girls

talking to me.

People

wanting to hang with me and laughing at everything I had to say.

Backing up for a sec; at the absolute beginning of this whole play process at auditions, there was a cast member I noticed as very attractive and i had my eye on. She's probably older than my parents, but a ridiculously gorgeous woman, and high soprano.

Well, she was glued to me for some reason. After I walked in and had been there for a minute talking with my family, she comes over and we started talking. ....and kept talking. Like, this was the most i had ever talked with her this entire thing, and she was just sipping her single glass of wine and talking and laughing with me. I was genuinely confused as to whether she was just proud of me, her motherly instincts had kicked in, or if there was something else cause uh... I wish I could describe her eyes when she looked at me.

OH, also I should mention that when she decided to leave, she pulls me into this long, tight hug, and then fucking tucks her head in and kisses me quite gently on the cheek. I genuinely was stunned because we had maybe hugged like... once(?) before when she was nervous and cold.

Oh, and speaking of cold/clothes, i should mention that I was wearing... a really good outfit. I had planned it out so i would look really good cause I play a nerd in the show and i wanted to counteract that. Well, i did. I'll post a picture of it later if i remember. But specifically once I took my jacket off, my short sleeves were rolled up (queer eye would be proud) and all of my tattoos were showing.

And oh my god,

did people love them.

I had people touching my arms, asking what they meant, mentioning that they had been wondering about my tattoos all night cause they had seen a glimpse of them at the beginning of the show when i wore a t-shirt for like one song.

Dude, it was insane.

So there was this other girl who had some incredible silver shoes there and this chick was flirrrrting. She was(is) so fucking cool. Like, her makeup was WILD and jeffree star would have been proud-- like glitter eyeshadow type proud. And she was like talking and laughing with me, then hanging with her friends and playing shuffle board-- but coming back to me to tell me about it. It was kinda overwhelming. By the end of the night, she comes up to me and like asks for my info and like says she wants to be in a play with me and we should be friends and all that. She then texted me right after too 🙈

There was also the drummer's girlfriend who, holy fucking shit she absolutely is stunning and slays life and just.. I cant. She's so cool and gorgeous and confident and wow. And she and i wound up talking and laughing and joking for quite a bit as well. I sweear, i don't get how her eyes exist, cause she would look at me and it was like with beautifully cunning and see right through you type of look..and yet full of amusement. Like she was ready and waiting to enjoy what i had to say. Crazy. But she and I hung for quite awhile. She'll be here today at this performance too and she told me that she is expecting me to have a different meaning behind my tattoos when she asks about then tonight.

There were some more friends of our cast members who were like talking with me and touching my arms and grabbing my hand. one woman even fucking took my hand and kissed it. I swear. Woah. It was so overwhelming. Everyone was just telling me how blown away they were and that i have to have to have to keep acting. I guess word might have gotten out that i was unsure whether i wanted to do more acting or not... People were literally begging me to do another play. My director literally is begging me to do another one... Like begging. You shoulda seen his eyes.

OH. speaking of guys, there was this beautiful young man who came up to me and was like telling me how much he loved my performance and was just blown away. Well, apparently this kid is like super critical and very talented and trained with vocals and he could not get over me. He was(is) definitely not straight and i honestly was enjoying him way too much. My cast member who was still with me at that point said to me afterwards that praise from him is rare and really has weight. So, yay lol

(I will admit that as overwhelmed as I was with all of the praise, I was handling the flirting well. I will admit to that. My instincts kicked in and i was flirting and being smooth. I couldnt help it.)

AND. now, for my final person who I have been holding out talking about-- my gorgeous cast member who has the deep voice and cuddles me for part of the play...

Dear lord. Her eyes on me. I really wanted to stop breathing. At the end of the night she and our director, the drummers girlfriend, my friend Kai (holy shit he's beautiful and he came all this way just to see my performance and he met my dad and god I love him but that's another post) and my mum and I were all hanging out. At one point, I was looking at and talking to our director. And then, I felt her eyes on me. Like, she was standing right next to me, but i FELT her eyes on me.

And oh my god, like what the fucking hell, I snuck and glance and i wonder if it was the alcohol, but her eyes are like glowing and filled with like... I don't even know. Like the biggest joy and adoring look I've ever seen. I forced myself to not make eye contact anymore just because what I could see of here eyes out of the corner of mine was making me slightly dizzy.

She put arms around me multiple times that night and when it was time to leave, she comes over, gives me this look I cant quite make sense of, and then grabs my face and kisses my cheek. Like, just suddenly. In front of my mom. And it was like a kiss that threw me way off holy shit cause I've never really gotten cheek kisses from people. But wow. This was one.

I swear my head was spinning and I did not know what to do with it all. Not just her, but everyone else too. However, when I'm driving home and talking with my little brother (dear god he's amazing. It was 1am and he was just letting me have my night. I fucking am so grateful for him) I mentioned the people flirting with me and HE GOES "oh my gosh, especially [her name]."

I kind of try to not react, but he said it like mutliple times as we drove "oh she was flirting. How she was looking at you...oh yeah." And I kind of just silently died the entire time.

Okay. So that's it. My very bisexual adventure. It's been a long time since one of those have happened. Sorry for the long read, but i needed to get it all out somewhere. I have another performance tonight and then on Sunday. And then 3 next weekend. So, expect more to happen.

I have no fucking idea how this is all gonna wind up, but I did NOT and was NOT expecting or ready for last night. I really wasnt. I really didn't. I still cant believe it. Idk what I'm gonna do.

Dear god.

#my gay adventures #my bisexual adventures #idk what the hell just happened

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robininthelabyrinth · 5 years

Text

Fic: An Internal Affair - Chapter 12 (Ao3 link)

Fandom: The Flash Pairing: Leonard Snart/Barry Allen

Summary: Leonard Snart, the CCPD Captain of Internal Affairs, is known as Captain Cold for a very good reason: He hates corrupt cops with a merciless vengeance, and once you’re on his list, you’re in serious trouble.

His next target?

A CCPD lab tech named Barry Allen who’s developed a suspicious habit of disappearing at random intervals.

—————————————————————————————————

There's a closet at the end of the hallway on the other side of the top floor from Barry's lab. It's little more than a glorified broom closet that sometimes gets used to store samples and evidence that's still being analyzed.

It's small, and dusty, and dark, but it's just large enough to have a small stool big enough to sit on inside (primarily used for going through samples because doing that while crouched over is hell on your back) and that makes it the perfect place to go have anxiety attacks in the middle of the day, if one were so inclined.

Barry is currently so inclined.

The last week or so has been crazy.

Just - legitimately, unbelievably crazy.

First there'd been the whole issue with Hartley Rathaway, who they'd barely stopped from destroying STAR Labs with his sonic weaponry a few weeks back. He should've been locked away safely, but he'd managed to trick Cisco into letting him escape from his cell in the Accelerator, and, despite Barry's best efforts to scour the city for him, they'd totally lost track of him after that.

At least he didn't seem intent on re-offending imminently, so there’s that, if nothing else.

That'd been bad enough, but what followed less than two days later..?

Insane.

Just.

Insane.

Where does Barry even start thinking about it?

At the beginning, he supposes: Iris returning from one of her fact-finding missions with the Anti-Flash Task Force with the news that Clyde Mardon, the first meta Barry ever defeated and which Joe had to shoot down, apparently had a brother named Mark Mardon, and that Mark Mardon was planning something in revenge. Something aimed specifically at Joe.

Iris had also been really weird around Joe but refused to explain why, just saying she was processing some stuff and would tell them both later once she figured out how she felt like reacting about it. Joe thinks it's just her reacting to there being a threat on his life, but Barry's not so sure about that.

(At least whatever it is wasn't Iris discovering the Flash thing, thank God - she assured Barry in private that whatever was bugging her didn't involve him and was entirely about Joe. He shouldn’t be as relieved by that as he is, but give him a break, he’s not a saint. Man, she is going to kill him when she finds out about the Flash thing, and he's going to deserve it.)

Either way, the CCPD took the threat seriously and began to take actions to protect Joe and guard the waterfront, except their actions weren't anywhere near enough because it turns out that Mark Mardon, like Clyde Mardon, is a weather-controlling meta.

A weather-controlling meta who decided that he was going to get back at Joe West by attacking his precious city, which he did by creating a freaking tsunami using the river.

A tsunami!

In Missouri!

What the hell, man; that's just wrong.

Barry’s never recommended therapy to a soul in his life, particularly after his own negative experiences as a kid, but seriously, if the choice is between talking through your issues with a therapist and trying to process them with a tsunami, go with the therapist!

He’s pretty sure Mardon didn’t expect for the tsunami to get as big as it did, judging by the expression on his face, but whatever he meant to do, what he did end up doing was creating a wave large enough that, if not stopped, would undoubtedly sweep through the entire city and destroy huge swaths of it.

Including the parts that had Iris and Joe and Len and Cisco and Caitlin in them.

Everyone had been utterly frantic, seeing no way to either stop the wave or evacuate the city in time. Based on a crazy last-second suggestion, Barry tried to create a counter-force by running as fast back-and-forth as he could, pushing himself past his limits, but he knew even as he forced himself into pain and beyond that it wasn’t going to be enough.

He wasn't going to be able to stop the tsunami.

And then – he did.

No, not with the counter-force idea; once he had a chance to think about it for a second he realized that it was an incredibly stupid idea to begin with. That didn't work.

What did work, though, was grabbing Mark Mardon out of his hiding place in Keystone City and putting him in the Accelerator before he ever had a chance to launch the tsunami.

Because apparently when Barry runs that fast, he went fast enough to go back in time by a day and stop the whole thing before it ever started.

Mardon problem solved.

Barry just doesn't know what to do about it.

It, of course, being the fact that he somehow actually traveled through time.

Backwards, that is, rather than the usual leisurely forward minute-by-minute progression he and everyone else normally does.

...holy crap, does that mean his "speed" powers might actually be a form of time manipulation? That he's not running "faster" than people, but rather that he's running at regular speed while time slows down around him?

No, that can't be right - Cisco routinely talks to him via the comms while he's running, which would be impossible if time had slowed down. Unless the time-slows-down effect is extremely localized, explaining why people immediately around Barry are moving too slow to "talk" but Cisco, at a distance, isn't...

Yeah, this whole focusing on trivial details or abstract questions isn't working to effectively distract him from the overarching point at issue here.

He ran backwards in time.

He ran backwards in time!

He ran.

Backwards.

In time.

Nope, no matter how many times Barry says that, it doesn’t get any less weird.

That shouldn't even be possible! Barry's a human being, not some bizarre singularity-black-hole in the making - unless that's what lies at the far end of his speed capacity –

Barry groans and puts his head in his hands.

He wants to talk to Iris about this, but he can't, because he's been lying to her so long about being the Flash that he doesn't know how he'd raise it even if Joe lifted his prohibition against telling her.

He wants to talk to Len, cool-headed, practical, sci-fi nerd Len, about this, but he can't, he can't just reveal himself now - and what if Len thinks that Barry's been deceiving him, too? He kinda has been, and they may be new to each other but Barry already knows that Len has deep-seated issues with deception and betrayal. So that's out, too.

And while Cisco and Caitlin are technically available, Barry desperately wants to talk to someone, anyone, that isn't part of what Cisco's been calling Team Flash, because he has the sinking feeling that they (or at least Dr. Wells) kinda-sorta-maybe theorized that this was going to happen.

The time travel stuff, that is.

Dr. Wells hadn't even been all that surprised about it! A total reworking of how humanity understands physics and the nature of time, but nope, Dr. Wells, a renowned physicist, doesn't seem to care about the scientific implications. If anything, he'd just been pissed off that Barry changed what happened - apparently he "should've been more careful with changing history" which, uh, seriously? Barry literally saved the whole city? That seems like a worthwhile change to him, whatever the personal costs that might come about as a result.

Also, seriously, he just broke physics, how is that not the priority issue here?!

It'd been weird. Not to mention how Dr. Wells' lack of surprise, combined with the vaguely pleased-anticipatory look Dr. Wells'd had when Barry first mentioned his time travel? Really making Barry feel kind of manipulated here. Or like a science experiment. Or like one of those psychology experiments where you don't tell the subject what the goal is in advance because that could affect the results...

Either way, he's feeling used.

All that emphasis on training speed - was it really to help Barry catch up to the Reverse Flash, as Cisco's started calling him, or was it to see if Barry could break the time barrier?

And if it was, why hadn't Wells just told him that was the goal?

Maybe Barry doesn't want to have the responsibility of fixing the timeline as well as the city, okay? He was a huge Harry Potter fan growing up - he's gotten into all the debates about what the wizarding world should and shouldn't have done with the Time-Turner technology/magic they apparently possessed for no reason other than to let an over-achieving student take extra classes, and damnit, he doesn't want to be book 3 Hermione! He doesn't want to have to be constantly thinking about what events over the previous day or whatever might be worth going back to fix! Barry's already doing two full-time jobs; time travel would just make the responsibility to be “always on” even worse! He wants to live a normal life sometime!

Cisco and Caitlin aren't any help, either with his complicated feelings about Dr. Wells or about the time travel thing. Cisco thinks time travel is cool, but in, like, a non-personal way, theorizing that Barry might go all Back To The Future on them and accidentally erase someone from existence which, thanks Cisco. Like Barry needs any more pressure here.

God, Barry loves the guy, don't get him wrong, but sometimes Cisco is too focused on whether something is "awesome" and not enough about the actual impact of that something. Prime example: Captain Cold's cold gun, which remains an outstanding threat.

Caitlin, too; he would've thought that she'd be more sympathetic, but she'd immediately started thinking of major historical events he could change for the better - mostly the Particle Accelerator explosion, which killed her fiancé and ruined her career. Which, again, wow, pressure much? Barry can't blame her for her reaction but then she and Cisco'd gotten into an argument about paradox and neither of them were really noticing Barry's freak-out so he just said he had to go back to work and came here.

And even putting aside the whole time travel business, he really can't talk about his disappointment in Dr. Wells with them of all people, because neither Cisco nor Caitlin seem to understand that it's not actually normal for a boss to run experiments on his staff without their consent. Apparently that's "just how Dr. Wells is" and "well, you know, he is a genius" - which is not okay! Forgiving someone for being a dick because they're a genius is, like, sign number one of a toxic working environment, and Barry legitimately doesn't know how to convey that to them.

It's like they've never had a union rep bring a lawyer to ramble at them for an hour about their rights as employees. Though now that Barry thinks of it, STAR Labs was probably never unionized, so that explains that, anyway...

Besides, even if he could think of a way to explain to them that he's really upset with Dr. Wells right now, he's not actually sure if there's even a point in trying to do so. They stayed with Dr. Wells after the Particle Accelerator explosion; Barry's not sure there's anything the man could do that would break their loyalty to him.

Which is by itself kind of weird? That's a lot of loyalty to have to a single guy in relation to, well, a job. Even Hartley had been weirdly obsessed with Wells as a person, rather than just as a bad boss. Barry can sympathize with the idea of Wells being a father figure, he totally gets that, but...it's a bit weird.

Weird or not, though, it's pretty depressing. Barry's never really thought about there being a difference in their goals, him and Dr. Wells, and it's kinda depressing to realize that if there is a difference, Cisco and Caitlin - probably his closest friends right now - would fall on Dr. Wells' side.

Man, he wishes he could talk about all this to Iris. Or Len.

(Not Joe. Joe would just immediately start encouraging Barry to use his time travel powers to stop routine crime, like murders and robberies, before they ever happened, and wouldn't understand at all why Barry's reluctant to take on that sort of responsibility. He hasn't even read Harry Potter! Or, like, Minority Report!)

No, what Barry needs is someone who's his friend, not Dr. Wells' friend, someone who's nerdy enough to get it, honorable enough to keep the whole thing a secret, and scientific enough to help him think through all the potential consequences here –

Holy crap, he's an idiot.

No: he's a genius.

The answer that would simultaneously solve both of his current problems just hit him.

First problem: the suddenly-too-constricting circle of people who know about him being the Flash, thus limiting who he can talk to about this time travel/Dr. Wells development.

Second problem: the fact that he's run into a total wall on the whole disappearances thing.

Answer: He can tell his CSI friends - Gila, Terri, and Andre - about the issue!

He can't believe he didn't think of this before. They're his friends, after all, even if he kinda-maybe-sorta has been neglecting them recently in favor of Cisco and Caitlin. No one's prohibited him from mentioning the Flash thing to them (unlike Iris), and as CSIs, they're familiar with keeping things totally confidential, which he needs them to do with his identity as the Flash.

It's perfect.

After all, they're all total nerds, so they'll be able to provide an objective (semi-objective, anyway) perspective into what's going on with Dr. Wells!

Plus, they might be able to help him make progress on finding the Reverse Flash - he still thinks Chemical X is speedster residue, but he hasn't been able to confirm that because he doesn't have the tools necessary to do that in his on-site lab. But his friends do, what with all those fancy new toys they're always telling him to come play with.

They also have access to all the same case files as he does, so if he crosses off all the ones he knows aren't related to the Reverse Flash, they might be able to see a pattern in the ones that are remaining. He's been trying, but it feels like every time he's on the verge of some sort of breakthrough, something Flash-related comes up.

Seriously, this Flash thing is really starting to take over his life. He hadn't had much of a life before, so he hadn't noticed it all that much, but now that he has an engaging project at work he wants to do in his free time, he's starting to realize that he doesn't actually have any free time anymore.

Or, at least, the fact that he's given Team Flash at STAR Labs the idea that he'd give every minute of his free time to them, and if he doesn't, Dr. Wells gets annoyed, and when that happens, Cisco and Caitlin call-slash-text him pleas to come sooner.

Yes, Barry could say no, and he's trying to do it more often, but he's kind of a doormat sometimes. He's aware of that.

Though the way Dr. Wells mentions his mom every time Barry skips out on training is really starting to piss Barry off...

He's getting distracted. The point here is that his idea - telling his friends - is a great idea, and he should do it.

(A little voice in his head suggests that there might be some downsides to the idea if he thinks about it a little longer, but he's really desperate to talk to someone, so he's just going to ignore that little voice. He's sure it'll be fine.)

Decision made, Barry jumps up.

He promptly knocks his head against one of the shelves and has to spend a few Flash-speed seconds catching all the evidence samples before they crash onto the ground, but when they're all back in order, he heads out right away.

The CSI building (technically, the off-site forensic science analysis division of the CCPD, but no one calls it that) is just as he remembers it: a big squat office building painted a soul-sucking taupe color, unlovely and boring and everything Barry's job is not.

Barry smiles at it fondly.

They throw the best holiday parties here. And birthday parties. And weekend parties, any time they have to work Sundays...yeah. This place is totally awesome.

Okay, maybe the parties aren't the most exciting by anyone else's standards - Barry's well aware that D&D marathon sessions, WoW LAN parties, and high-stakes science trivia drinking contests aren't everyone's speed, but they definitely are his.

It's a good place.

Barry considers just running upstairs, but that seems rude, so he buzzes in through the front desk like a proper visitor would. The door guy - a friendly if somewhat nebbish guy named Gary who's studying frantically for grad school just about every second he can, something that doesn't seem to have changed in the entire time Barry's known him - looks up from his textbook and exclaims, "Barry! Buddy! It's so good to see you!"

Barry grins. "Hey, Gary. How's it hanging? How's John?"

Gary flushes pink in delight. "I can't believe you remember my boyfriend's name. You only met him once!"

"Between the British accent, trenchcoat, and tendency to flirt with everything up to and including inanimate objects after a few drinks, John was very memorable," Barry says dryly. "You're still together?"

"Yeah, we're good," Gary says. "He's been a bit busy with this thing at work - something called Project Rising Darkness, I don't know, I think his co-worker Manny thought it up, he's kinda emo - but he's been helping me apply to work with the FBI in my spare time now that I'm on the verge of graduating."

"At last! That's really great, Gary; I hope you make it," Barry says warmly. Something occurs to him. "Uh, actually, do you know about the new Internal Affairs guy in the CCPD?"

"No; what about him?"

"I hear he used to do undercover work in a joint CCPD-FBI group," Barry says. "Maybe he could recommend you?"

"You think so?" Gary asks, brightening. "That would be amazing! I'll reach out to him."

"You do that," Barry says, amused. He's pretty sure Gary's unique combination of overwhelming optimism and extreme eagerness to please could evoke sympathy from anyone, whether they’re an undead zombie or a ninja assassin or both; a mere supervillain like Captain Cold doesn't stand a chance. Besides, it could actually help Gary's career. "I'm here to talk to Gila, Terri, and Andre - are they still in the old room?"

"Your old crew, of course! I should have guessed," Gary says, beaming. "No, they're on the new floor - let me give you directions."

Good thing Barry asked.

See, there's some benefit to going slow sometimes.

(Barry really wishes he could think of a good way to tell Len about being the Flash - he'd get such a kick out of all the slow/fast puns Barry's made so far.)

When Barry gets up to the new floor, though, he slows down for a completely different reason.

"What the hell...?"

"Barry!" Gila exclaims, abruptly appearing out the door. That part's not a surprise; Gila was the person who inspired Barry's belief that chubby five-foot-two women with hair a color of red not found in nature are capable of a sort of magic sudden appearance thing that the Flash can only envy. "You finally came to visit!"

Barry just gestures mutely.

She grins. "So what you're saying is that you like the new lab."

"You said you got new machines!" Barry yowls. "You didn't say they redid everything with state-of-the-art tech!"

Andre - Gila's opposite in every respect, being tall, skinny, and dark-skinned - strolls out of the door, laughing. "They felt very bad," he says, grinning. "You know, you look remarkably well for someone who was in a coma for nine months."

"I know," Barry says, grinning back. "But seriously! Look at this! This is amazing!"

"You want a tour?" Terri asks, joining the rest of them.

"Do I ever!"

The tour takes them all past the end of official working hours, but no one minds; they're all used to working odd hours.

By the end of the tour, Barry's fallen in love. Deeply, irrevocably in love - with one of the new spectroanalysis machines, which he's named Julie.

"You know you can't take that back to the city with you," Andre says, sniggering.

"You can't separate me and Julie! We're meant to be!" Barry exclaims, hugging the machine.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever, you big baby. You're the one who volunteered to be the on-site tech," Gila laughs. "You get the fresh crime scenes, we get the cool tech – deal with it!"

Barry mock-grumbles at her.

"Now, it's getting late," Terri says briskly. "Why don't you tell us why you're really here?"

Barry blinks.

"We're your friends, B," Andre says, not without fondness. "We know you and love you for the absent-minded super-focused asshole you are. No way you came all the way out here just to say hi and go on a tour our admittedly kickass new facility; if you wanted to do that, you would've done much earlier on."

"So what's the issue and how can we help?" Gila asks.

"Uh," Barry says.

He's never really had to tell someone. Maybe Felicity, but that was because she already knew about Oliver and he could just, you know, communicate in lots of "you know..? You know..."s.

Well, at least he can consider this good practice for telling someone like Len or Iris.

"Okay," he says. "I have - no, wait. Can you guys first promise to keep this, like, super confidential? The most confidential. It's really important. I might not be able to tell you everything, but I want to tell you some of it and, well, yeah. You guys promise?"

They all impatiently agree.

"Okay," Barry says again. Wow, this is harder to get out than he thought. Maybe it'd be easier with an oblique approach? "Uh - I have a lead on Chemical X."

"You do?!" Gila exclaims.

"Well, a hunch," he corrects. "Let's take a step back: the Particle Accelerator explosion released a lot of dark matter -"

"And don't we know it," Terri grumbles.

"- and it's been affecting people."

"How?" Andre asks.

"They've been developing strange abilities," Barry tells them. "All sorts. We've been calling them 'meta-humans'."

"You and the CCPD?"

"Uh," Barry says. "No. Me and the scientists over at STAR Labs."

"Wells," Terri growls. "Of course he'd know more than he let on."

"He's trying to help," Barry says firmly. "Please try to stay objective, Terri. Anyway: you know how you think the Flash is an urban legend?"

"Less so now, after all the reported sightings," Andre says wryly. "A good scientist admits when their hypothesis is wrong...You're saying the Flash is one of these meta-humans? That the dark matter somehow gave someone the ability to, what, run at incredible speeds?"

"Yes. And not just him; there's another speedster out there, dressed in yellow instead of red and emitting red lightning instead of yellow. I think that speedster is behind the disappearances, and that Chemical X is the residue left behind when he runs."

"A human running at Mach speeds," Gila says thoughtfully. She's the chemical analysis expert of the three of them, compared to Barry's jack-of-all-trades (with an interest in weird stuff), Terri's forensic accounting, and Andre's fingerprint/DNA specialization. "That might do the trick, yeah. But what makes you think it's not the Flash? I've never even heard of this second speedster: Occam's Razor suggests one makes more sense than two."

Ouch. No wonder Captain Cold is suspicious, if even Barry's friends jump to that assumption.

...huh. Maybe the guy really isn't a supervillain - just a very unorthodox cop worried that Barry's up to something.

Barry doesn't know exactly what to do with that thought, so he shelves it for later.

"No," he says. "I know it's not the Flash."

"Why?" Andre asks.

"Well..."

Barry runs.

Just from one end of the lab to the other, but it's enough to make his point.

"Holy crap!" Terri exclaims, amid similar exclamations. "Barry, what the hell?"

"See," he says, grinning. "Told you I knew it wasn't the Flash. Cool, isn't it?"

There's another five solid minutes of yelling about how freaking awesome super-speed is and potential scientific implications and possible applications before they finally settle down.

That, of course, is when Barry breaks out the time travel thing, and that gets all of them yelling again, this time for ten minutes.

Barry enjoys the whole thing. Not just because they do, in fact, think that the whole Flash thing pretty damn awesome but also because some of their ideas about scientific applications of his usual Flash powers are pretty damn neat: learning about brain plasticity by studying the effect of learning at super-speed, the possibility of transferring his healing powers (even if only temporarily) via a blood or bone marrow transfusion, super-speed surgery or fire rescue or even just using it to test the laws of physics as they know them...

Honestly, this is more along the lines of what Barry was expecting when Dr. Wells had asked him to agree to help scientific progress by allowing himself to be studied: crazy brainstorming, hypothesizing, testing, record-keeping with an eye towards eventual publication...

Huh.

Why haven't they done that at STAR Labs? How have they all managed to get so fully fixated on the question of speed, and specifically of maximizing speed? Even before he'd found out about the Man in Yellow and how he needed to catch up to him, everything they'd done had been aimed at making him faster.

Sure, one of the joys of a new discovery is finding out its limits, but getting to a top speed isn't the only limit they could be testing.

Now that he thinks about it, Caitlin's wistful requests to study his biological reactions were always brushed off, as were Cisco's occasional daydreams about trying to replicate even a lower level of speed in his machines; at this point, they've stopped even asking - Caitlin focusing all her research on maximizing his metabolism to enable further speed, Cisco doing nothing but creating new suits that can go faster. No different experiments, no exploring different alternatives, barely any hypothesizing and no control groups at all...

That - isn't how science is supposed to work.

Barry has the distinct sinking feeling that something is even more wrong in STAR Labs than he'd originally thought, and that in his excitement over his new abilities and joy at having new friends, he may have overlooked it entirely.

Great.

He hasn't had a chance to raise the whole Wells issue with his CSI friends yet, but he's starting to think that he might need to raise that on a different visit. Possibly after he's had some time to think about it and figure out if he's just being unduly paranoid or if there really is something off there.

After all, Terri already dislikes Wells, thinking there was something intentional behind the Accelerator explosion; if Barry doesn't tread lightly here, they might not be willing to entertain the possibility that it's all a coincidence.

...a really big coincidence.

"Okay, okay, okay!" Terri eventually shouts, holding up their hands. "Hush. We can brainstorm ideas later. Barry, I assume the difficulty you're having is in both running and analyzing?"

"I definitely leave a residue that appears similar on a surface glance," Barry confirms. "And it seems pretty similar, but I'm worried about there being bias affecting my ability to confirm if it's definitely Chemical X..."

"We have a lab room for testing," Gila says, taking charge. Chemical analysis is her specialty, even though she prefers to throw the weirder things over to Barry. "Come on."

The test, when done properly - Gila insists on several variations, plus a few "control" runs using Andre, which is so normal Barry feels like crying in relief - takes about an hour to finish on the new machines.

Barry spends the whole hour telling the group stories about the metas he's defeated – unsurprisingly, they’re a lot less interested in how he defeated them than they are in just what abilities dark matter can produce, so he eventually gives up on trying to tell them the stories and starts just describing the meta powers and letting them brainstorm possible applications or explanations for them – and trying to decide on whether he should bring up the Wells thing or not.

Assuming there even is a Wells thing beyond some crappy scientific method, bad management skills, and a few weird reactions.

He still hasn't decided by the time the result comes out.

And the result -

"Yep, this is definitely Chemical X or something extremely similar," Gila reports. "The analysis matches on multiple vectors. Congrats, Barry, you have a residue; the only question now is if you're secretly a serial kidnapper."

"Hey!"

"Joking," Gila says, smiling crookedly. "You were definitely in a coma for a few of these early ones. We came to visit a few times. You're all alibi'd out."

"Speaking of which," Terri says from where they and Andre have been pouring over the case files. "Can you come here and double-check some of these? I'm starting to see a pattern, but there are a few outliers."

Barry comes over, noticing that the files have been divided into three piles, one large and two smaller ones. "Yeah, I think -"

"No, no, there's just a few in particular," Terri says. "And I want you to think carefully if there's any chance they could be Flash-adjacent, any chance at all."

Barry nods, frowning. "You think you have something?"

"Well, maybe. I don’t know why the disappearances related to the Flash would be different, they’re still disappearances, but ignoring that, if we try to exclude them, then I think I see two patterns instead of one," Terri says. "It's not unusual in forensic accounting - people are rarely corrupt in only one way, if that makes sense? They usually have a couple of different plots happening at the same time, and that can confuse the results if you look for only one explanation. But these outliers...well, they might just be outliers. But based on the stories you've been telling us, these actually feel like they might be Flash-related, and therefore can be excluded, which would support my theory."

"What do you mean?"

“Well, take this one, Mason Bridges – he was investigating the Flash, right? And then there’s this one, Simon Stagg.”

“What about him?”

“Didn't you say you fought him - or, uh, around him, anyway - at Stagg Industries?”

Barry blinks. He hadn’t thought of that. “Yeah, good point,” he says. “Danton Black – he’s the one who basically committed suicide, it was awful – was trying to get back at Stagg Industries because they stole his work on cellular regeneration and took credit for it.”

“So Stagg witnessed a fight between a meta and the Flash right before he disappeared?”

“Uh,” Barry says. “Yes?”

“So we can say those are tangentially Flash related, too,” Terri says briskly, putting the two files into one of the smaller piles. “And this Farooq guy you mentioned, who used lightning to get rid of your powers and then got driven off –”

“I’m, like, 90% sure he died, but I’m honestly not sure.”

“No body, though,” Terri says. “I’m counting it as a disappearance. Plus you take the fact that that Professor Stein guy’s last known whereabouts were when he was heading to STAR Labs –”

“That was way before my time, though,” Barry objects. “He disappeared before the Accelerator even blew!”

“Good point. I’ll put him in the STAR Labs pile.”

Barry’s eyebrows go up. “STAR Labs pile?”

“As far as I can tell,” Terri says, “a handful of these disappearances can only be connected by the fact that they’re related to STAR Labs, particularly prior to the explosion. Could just be coincidence, but we're dealing with disappearances including the man in charge of building permits, a local paparazzo who went there to look for a scoop and never came back, this professor going there right before the explosion, that sort of thing, and since I'm looking for any pattern at all right now, I'm going to take it. But here's the interesting thing: if we put those aside, and put aside the specifically Flash-related ones as well, the rest of these – ” And here they gestured at the large pile. “– have a significantly more sinister connection.”

“Sinister?” Gila echoes.

Terri makes a face. “I’m pretty sure they’re Family hits.”

“They’re what?! No way!”

“Unfortunately so,” Terri says. “It’s pretty subtle – a lot of these people are only tangentially related to Family stuff, accountants or political figures or hospital staff or county clerks – but I’ve been doing a lot of work for the organized crime division recently, following the money trails, and I recognize some of these names.”

Barry sits down hard, all thoughts of Wells abruptly wiped from his mind. “The Man in Yellow is working as a Family assassin?”

“Possibly,” Terri says, reaching out to tap what they’d dubbed the ‘STAR Labs’ pile thoughtfully. “Not sure how that relates to these one ones if that's the case...Though if they are a Family assassin, the question arises: why? And why aren’t they doing more of them?”

“Assassination at super-speed,” Gila marvels. “They could kill the mayor in the middle of city square and no one could stop them.”

They all look at her.

“It wasn’t a suggestion! I was just saying.”

“The Families aren’t going to act that publicly,” Andre says, shaking his head. “Not in a million years; that’d bring the Feds down on their heads.”

“Not to mention inciting the whole city to riot,” Terri says. “Central’s very ‘oh, well, the Families, what can you do’ most of the time, but public interference on that scale? No way. No one would tolerate it. The only reason they’re tolerated as much as they are now is because most people feel comfortable with the way they’re cordoned off: their operations are mostly focused on the slums, their protection rackets don’t extend to the wealthiest neighborhoods, and so what if they bribe a few councilmen? We all know who they are, so it's almost like having a comforting safety valve.”

“Same with the police,” Barry says, making a face. “We all know which guys are in Family pockets are, so we all shrug it off, saying it’s better to know who it is than not to know.”

“I wasn’t saying they’d do it,” Gila protests. “Just that they could, you know, and what are people going to say? A streak of light did it? How would they even connect that to the Families? If they don’t know there are two speedsters, they’d probably just assume it was the Flash!”

Uh.

Barry hadn’t thought of that.

“Everyone would just assume it was the Families, even if they also thought it was the Flash,” Andre points out. “Everyone always blames crime in Central on the Families, and they’re usually right, too.”

Right.

Whew.

Barry doesn't want to deal with the thought of being framed at super-speed.

“I have a better question, though,” Andre continues. “If these are the Families, why are there so many? Like Terri said, the Families exist in a pretty tight balance in Central: enough influence to rule the streets, not enough to bother the movers and shakers. This many hits, in such a short amount of time? That’s not balanced. They must be planning something big.”

“The Families have been fading in power recently,” Terri offers. “Power-wise. The Feds have been taking huge bites out of them for the last decade and a half, ambushing major deals, busting huge deposits, blocking key intake lines…”

Barry snaps his fingers. “Captain Cold!”

“…what?”

“No, sorry, the new Internal Affairs guy, Captain Snart,” Barry says. “Captain Singh told me that he used to be undercover, that his cover got blown, and that the Families are still trying to kill him. He’s been helping bring them down!”

“And now he’s changed tracks to start taking down corrupt Family-bribed cops?” Gila asks, sounding impressed. “I mean, good for him; that's real dedication and work ethic there, at least for the three weeks he’s probably got left to live until the Families murder him. Especially with these disappearances.”

“Holy crap,” Barry says.

“What?”

“No, it just occurred to me,” Barry says. “All these disappearances – the Anti-Flash Task Force, which Captain Snart is involved with, is looking into these disappearances. Like you said, if you don’t know there’s two speedsters, you think it’s the Flash! That’s why he’s looking into the Flash!”

“Reasonable enough,” Terri says.

Barry shakes his head. He’s been so obsessed with trying to figure out Captain Cold’s evil plan – because, like, the guy has a mask, a superpowered cold gun, cold puns, supervillain is clearly the obvious conclusion here – that even though the thought had occurred to him once or twice, he’d never really believed in the possibility that maybe the guy is actually, well, doing his job.

Except – it seems like that’s probably what’s going on.

So weird.

“I’m going to need to think about this,” Barry says.

“Make sense,” Gila says. “Now what, though? I assume you don’t want to out yourself as the Flash.”

“Definitely not.”

“I’ll write up a draft report about how these particular disappearances appear linked to the Families,” Terri offers. “That’ll get everyone on the right track, I think, without needing to get into the other ones being Flash-related. But Gila will eventually need to submit something on the residue…”

“I can say it might be related to a speedster,” Gila says. “But that might lead him to suspect the Flash more…”

“No, you should still do that, even if it makes him suspicious,” Barry says. “Stopping this guy is the top priority, above everything else. If I have to stop being the Flash for a while or talk to Captain Snart about what I’m doing, I’ll do that. I’ll figure something out.”

“Good luck!”

Barry heads back to the office, torn between being absolutely elated at the progress they’re making and kind of horrified at what they’ve discovered. Somehow, even though he’d signed up to be a superhero, he hadn’t really thought about going up against the Families – the closest he’d come was fighting Nimbus, and that’d been one of the toughest fights he’d had yet –

There’s someone in his office.

It’s pretty late, getting close to nine p.m.; the building should be deserted. The CSI lab, which is basically Barry’s private area, should definitely be deserted; there shouldn’t be someone walking around with only one dim phone light to guide them.

What the hell’s going on?

Barry reaches inside the room and flips on all the lights at once.

“Jesus fuck!” the intruder swears, clutching at his eyes to shield himself from the glare.

The intruder –

“Detective Lloyd?” Barry asks, surprised. “What are you doing here?”

“I was looking for some of case files and evidence someone checked out,” Lloyd says, sounding annoyed. “What’re you doing here? Isn’t it past your bedtime?”

“I had to duck out for an appointment,” Barry lies. “I came back to finish up some projects. You know, if you think the evidence is up here, then the only person who could’ve checked them out is me – which cases are you looking for? I might be able to help you find it.”

Lloyd rattles off some case numbers.

Those are a few of the disappearance cases, some of the ones they’d determined were probably Family hits.

“Oh, yeah, I know where those are,” Barry says, heading towards the evidence cabinet, as he's mentally dubbed it. “Gimme a second. How long do you need them? I still have a few tests I'd like to run..."

"I don't think that's a good idea, Allen," Lloyd says.

Barry pauses in the middle of pulling out the evidence bags. "What do you mean?"

"Well, you know how it is. What with the Commissioner running for office and all, that means Deputy Commissioner Gillick's going to be moving up soon, and he doesn't like too much spending," Lloyd says, reaching out and plucking the bags out of Barry's hands. "Especially on low-priority cases like this."

"I know they're not at the top of the queue," Barry says, a little stung. "But they're still important. In fact -"

He's about to tell Lloyd about the Family connection, but Lloyd cuts him off.

"They're low-priority, Allen," he says. "Trust me. No one wants to be wasting time looking into these. Just relax, will you? Take another - heh - day off. We've got a pretty good handle on these cases." He waves the bag. "And we're pretty sure there's nothing all that serious to them."

"But -"

"That's final, Allen," Lloyd says. "Listen, take a tip from a friend, yeah? You want people to like you, you do your job, you do it well, and you don't step on people's toes in the process. It's not like these cases are going down the memory chute or something; we're just bumping them down so they don't interfere with more important stuff. You hear me?"

"I hear you," Barry says, still frowning.

Lloyd slaps him on the back, says, "I knew you weren't as uptight as they say," and heads out.

Barry would normally spend the next hour stressing out about who 'they' are and the fact that he's totally not uptight but do people think he is, but he's too busy being utterly appalled.

Why would Lloyd be warning Barry off a Family-related case? He's not one of the cops in the Family pocket, not even slightly; there's never been a hint of scandal there.

Honestly, if Barry hadn't known it was a Family case, he probably wouldn't have even thought it was all that weird. Lloyd's heavy-handed suggestion to butt out is practically normal for cops, who are notoriously protective of their cases, and even the weird hour he came by isn't all that unusual for a cop.

It's not that Barry's worried or anything, of course: once Terri and the others submit their report, the cases will be upgraded once more, no matter what Lloyd says.

But - it is a Family case. And Lloyd tried to squelch it.

Why would he do that, if it wasn't on the orders of one of the Families? Was it on someone else's orders? If so, who, and why is Lloyd listening to them?

What's going on here?

#coldflash #barry allen #leonard snart #iris west #joe west #eobard thawne #Harrison wells #cisco ramon #Caitlin snow #gary green #john constantine #my fic #an internal affair

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incorrectchoniberonicaswangs · 5 years

Text

hey baby won't you look my way (i can be your new addiction)

Chapter 7: gays you ever just ahsnfdjsl?? part 1

Chapter Summary: Holiday parties are planned, Cheryl and Toni are Kevin's sapphic moms, an intervention is held, Alice and Hermione are adorable and everyone loves them, Kangs has some news, and Sweet Pea runs away from his problems.

Notes: theMANtle: reggie

ao3

Friday, 3:17 PM

gays united

hbicheryl: its winter break!! finally a respite from the chaos!!

jugheadalones: im so excited!

hbicheryl: hold up, hobo is excited about something??

hisshissmotherfucker: ^^ jones are you sick

jugheadalones: okay, first of all fuck you

jugheadalones: second of all im excited to return to the near-comatose state i maintain every time we have a long period of time off from school

nopeaz: that makes more sense

veroffica: as enjoyable as that likely is to you, holden caulfield, it won't be happening this break. i'm hosting a christmas eve party at the pembrooke starting at 8:00 pm and you are all invited.

veroffica: and you'd better all show up, or else i'll sic my new bodyguard on you.

goingtoheller: i assume you mean betty.

wannabett: guilty :/

spillthefogarTEA: ill be there. and NOT because of your threats

spillthefogarTEA: even though betty is kind of intimidating

goingtoheller: i'll come as well.

nopeaz: cher and ill come too

hisshissmotherfucker: i love parties im there

jugheadalones: i dont suppose i really have a choice do i?

wannabett: not really. sorry jug

jugheadalones: fine.

hbicheryl: speaking of holiday parties

hbicheryl: new years eve party, thistlehouse, time tbd, if you arent there youre dead to me

veroffica: b and i will be there.

spillthefogarTEA: me too

goingtoheller: i'll be there.

hisshissmotherfucker: i hear cheryls parties are infamously dramatic

hisshissmotherfucker: so im definitely coming

hisshissmotherfucker: as long as i dont end up doing seven minutes in heaven with archie like veronica

veroffica: will nobody ever let me forget that??

hisshissmotherfucker: nope

jugheadalones: why do all these party invites come with threats of retribution if you dont attend?

hbicheryl: bc if there wasnt then youd never come

jugheadalones: ill come. begrudgingly.

nopeaz: and ofc ill be there obviously

jugheadalones: wait am i missing something? why is that obvious?

hbicheryl: oh right we didnt tell you lol

hbicheryl: tt moved in with me

goingtoheller: WHAT??

goingtoheller: my sapphic moms moved in together aND I HAD NO FUCKING IDEA??

hisshissmotherfucker: why is keller suddenly chonis kid when did this happen??

hbicheryl: please kevin is basically toni and i's love child

hbicheryl: he has my sass (well not as good as mine but hes trying), my gayness, and my strange desire for dumbass serpents

nopeaz: and my propensity for saying 'this is riveting i cant breathe'

goingtoheller: aw, thanks, moms! mostly! :)

nopeaz: no problem son

hbicheryl: yes we are very proud of you kev (mostly)

jugheadalones: huh i never actually thought about it but that... works?

wannabett: okay cheryl and toni are like the least qualified people here to be anyones lesbian moms?? theyre literally gang members??

hbicheryl: stfu nightmare smurfette do not EVER criticize my parenting skills

hbicheryl: toni and i have slaved for weeks, even MONTHS to make sure that kevin turns into a proper young gay man

hbicheryl: and you have the AUDACITY to suggest that just because my gf and i are deeply flawed people we would corrupt poor kevin??

wannabett: uh... no?

hbicheryl: thats what i thought

nopeaz: wow angry cheryl is scary but hot

spillthefogarTEA: topaz, you are so whipped

spillthefogarTEA: and REALLY fucking gay

nopeaz: yeah ik

jugheadalones: moving on

jugheadalones: speaking of people taking a big step and deciding to live with each other... betty and veronica, we need to talk.

veroffica: um... what?

veroffica: is this some sort of intervention?

hisshissmotherfucker: yes

spillthefogarTEA: moving in together might be considered friendly if, say, betty didnt already have a house that she lives in

nopeaz: but this decision is beyond simple friendship

hbicheryl: and its certainly anything but heterosexual

wannabett: why are you guys finishing each others sentences?? did you plan this??

hisshissmotherfucker: no shit sherlock

veroffica: how do you guys even have this information??

goingtoheller: we have our ways.

wannabett: archie somehow saw our texts through my window

wannabett: jughead told me last night, sorry i didnt tell you v, i didnt know that this was going to happen

nopeaz: dammit jones why do you have to ruin all our fun!!

jugheadalones: i didnt realize that this was a rule?

jugheadalones: so anyway

jugheadalones: b&v, now that you have been confronted with cold hard proof of your undying love for each other, what do you have to say for yourselves?

wannabett: guys im straight!!

goingtoheller: ooh, betty's pulling the straight card.

hbicheryl: i called it! tt, sp, fangs, and jughead, you all owe me $10

hbicheryl: cousin betty is nothing if not predictable in the face of her sexuality being questioned

veroffica: hey, you made bets on this?? not cool!

wannabett: ^^^^

wannabett: and i am NOT predictable!!

hbicheryl: i predicted she was going to say that

hbicheryl: thats another $10 guys

hisshissmotherfucker: for once i trusted in someones willingness to admit when they were wrong and now because of that cheryl is robbing us blind! smh never again

spillthefogarTEA: veronica? you never answered the question

veroffica: uh...

veroffica: i mean, um...

veroffica: we've never even kissed! i'm pretty sure we aren't dating!

nopeaz: to be fair though i wouldnt be surprised if you two were dating without knowing it

veroffica: guys, now really isn't a good time.

jugheadalones: mmmhmm

wannabett: no seriously v and i are getting ready for the christmas eve party

wannabett: its in three days remember

hbicheryl: ugh fine i suppose thats a reasonable explanation

veroffica: and since i know that you won't let this go, at the party you can ask us whatever you want about this.

goingtoheller: wait... for real?

wannabett: uh yeah really v??

veroffica: within reason, of course.

spillthefogarTEA: wow this is more than i expected to come from this

veroffica: one condition, though. you can't pester b and i about it before the party.

veroffica: deal?

hisshissmotherfucker: deal

wannabett: now that thats settled v and i are going to get to work

veroffica: we'll probably be off the grid until maybe a few hours before the party.

[wannabett is offline]

[veroffica is offline]

hbicheryl: toni and i are already headed over to pops, anyone want to join us?

jugheadalones: wont we just be three-wheeling?

hbicheryl: not if we are in a large group

hisshissmotherfucker: ill come if you come jones

jugheadalones: sure.

hisshissmotherfucker: ill be there in five

[hisshissmotherfucker is offline]

jugheadalones: kevin, fangs?

spillthefogarTEA: im good

goingtoheller: ^^

nopeaz: okay otw

[nopeaz is offline]

[hbicheryl is offline]

jugheadalones: leaving now

[jugheadalones is offline]

6:35 PM

nopeaz: GUYS YOULL NEVER BELIEVE WHO JUST WALKED IN

spillthefogarTEA: who is it??

spillthefogarTEA: tell me you know im not good with suspense!!

jugheadalones: its alice cooper and hermione lodge!

hisshissmotherfucker: it seems as though archies intel was correct again

hisshissmotherfucker: damn that omniscient fucking northsider

hbicheryl: now i really wish that betty and veronica werent offline so they could hear about this

goingtoheller: why? do you hate them?

hbicheryl: hate is a strong word

hbicheryl: id say that i just occasionally want them to suffer

goingtoheller: that isn't much better...

hbicheryl: i guess ill just have to wait until the party to tell them

nopeaz: okay so they just got a booth and its basically diagonal from ours

jugheadalones: but theyre so enamoured with each other i dont think they even noticed that were here

hbicheryl: wow i dont think ive ever seen aunt alice this happy before

spillthefogarTEA: ugh this sounds so adorable i wish i was there

hisshissmotherfucker: dont worry well narrate their every movement so well itll be like you are

nopeaz: oh shit they keep reaching for each other like every five seconds

spillthefogarTEA: im WEAK

jugheadalones: its so hard to believe that they ever hated each other with the way theyre acting now

jugheadalones: homophobia can really fuck shit up huh

goingtoheller: this is the couple i never knew i needed, but now that i have seen that it's possible, i'm in love.

hisshissmotherfucker: im in shock i cant believe that the same alice cooper that grounded her daughter from any and all contact with the outside world is now just essentially the personification of heart eyes

hbicheryl: this town is so small were all basically inbred

hbicheryl: next thing you know fp and fred are going to be fucking too

jugheadalones: okay i did NOT need that image

nopeaz: AHHHH THEY WENT IN FOR A KISS MAYDAY MAYDAY THIS IS NOT A DRILL

spillthefogarTEA: AHHHHH

goingtoheller: AHHHHHHH

nopeaz: AHHHHHHH

jugheadalones: even i, being asexual and aromantic, have to admit that im loving living vicariously through these two

hisshissmotherfucker: k so they stopped

hisshissmotherfucker: wait no theyre kissing again!

hisshissmotherfucker: and again!

hisshissmotherfucker: okay now theyre just making out

nopeaz: get it girl(s)

hbicheryl: its getting pretty heated

hbicheryl: it feels like the windows are going to start fogging up

jugheadalones: oh damn they stopped

jugheadalones: ms cooper is waving pop over now

goingtoheller: is it creepy that we're so invested in their date?

spillthefogarTEA: probably not

hisshissmotherfucker: nah

jugheadalones: lets go with no

nopeaz: nope

hbicheryl: its only creepy if we get turned on

goingtoheller: moving on... what's happening now??

nopeaz: they got the check and now theyre paying

nopeaz: they can barely keep their hands off of each other

nopeaz: now theyre leaving

nopeaz: should i follow them to keep narrating?

goingtoheller: won't they notice??

jugheadalones: no theyve only got eyes for each other

jugheadalones: follow them SUBTLY while we hold down the table

nopeaz: roger that

hbicheryl: youre such a nerd

nopeaz: you love it

hbicheryl: duh

hbicheryl: now follow them!!

nopeaz: already doing it

nopeaz: so they made it to their car

nopeaz: okay wow wasnt expecting that but im not complaining

spillthefogarTEA: whats happening???

nopeaz: alice just shoved hermione up against the car door and now theyre hardcore making out

nopeaz: damn i wonder if theyre even going to get home or if theyre just going to do it in the parking lot

hisshissmotherfucker: i cant believe alice cooper and mayor lodge BOTH have better sex lives than i do wtf

goingtoheller: who knew that hermione lodge was such a bottom??

hbicheryl: well you know what they say about people in positions of power

hbicheryl: top in the streets bottom in the sheets

jugheadalones: wait cheryl that could apply to you as well

spillthefogarTEA: ooh is the class president getting the strap from the vice president

nopeaz: fuck off fangs

nopeaz: okay so they finally managed to regain some semblance of control

nopeaz: aaaaand theyre driving away

nopeaz: shows over folks

hbicheryl: lets clear out men

nopeaz: meet me by the bike cher

hbicheryl: be there in a sec babe xx

jugheadalones: wait are you telling me that cheryl blossom rode a motorcycle??

hisshissmotherfucker: yeah red i thought you said they were death traps

hbicheryl: well yeah but that was before i got on it

hbicheryl: its like a giant vibrator

hbicheryl: and riding it with toni is basically just the most acceptable type of public sex

goingtoheller: gross.

hisshissmotherfucker: never thought id agree with keller but yeah tmi

nopeaz: whatever

nopeaz: bye fuckers see you all at veronicas party

[nopeaz is offline]

[hbicheryl is offline]

jugheadalones: im headed out too

[jugheadalones is offline]

hisshissmotherfucker: me too

[hisshissmotherfucker is offline]

Monday, 6:43 PM

wannabett: b&v are back bitches!!

veroffica: and, looking through the chat from the past few days... i'm glad i was gone.

wannabett: although now i know what 'hot date' my mom was talking about :/

wannabett: even though i never wanted to know

wannabett: some things are best kept secret especially when your mom goes out on a date with your best friends mom!!

hbicheryl: youre welcome :)

veroffica: cheryl, at this very moment, i simultaneously respect, despise, and fear you.

hbicheryl: aw thanks thats what im always going for!

veroffica: anyway, the party will be starting in an hour or so, but some of my relatives will be over in the meantime. if you've got anything to say that doesn't involve the date my mom and betty's mom have, feel free. if you don't, go to hell.

hisshissmotherfucker: hey im in the neighborhood and i dont have anything else to do would you mind if i came over now

veroffica: sure thing!

hisshissmotherfucker: are you sure your relatives will be fine with me being there?

veroffica: yeah. i mean, betty's here too anyway!

hisshissmotherfucker: k

6:48 PM

goingtoheller + veroffica

goingtoheller: hey, would you happen to have some time you could set away during the party? fangs and i have an announcement we'd like to make.

veroffica: sure thing, kev. how does around 10 sound?

goingtoheller: perfect. thanks, v!

veroffica: no problem.

7:22 PM

gays united

hisshissmotherfucker: rn betty looks like she cant decide whether to be a guard dog or an excited puppy lmao

jugheadalones: context?

hisshissmotherfucker: veronicas greeting her relatives and bettys following her so closely shes practically stepping on her heels

goingtoheller: well, v is definitely holding betty's leash.

nopeaz: yeah veronicas got her by the collar

spillthefogarTEA: if betty doesnt watch her step then shes really going to be in the doghouse

wannabett: stop with the dog puns!! i am not a dog!!

hbicheryl: okay but you have to admit those were pretty good

wannabett: i will admit no such thing! now if youll excuse me im going to go back to talking to ronnies relatives with her

[wannabett is offline]

hisshissmotherfucker: i guess ill keep you all informed on their gay shenanigans

nopeaz: who even says shenanigans anymore??

hisshissmotherfucker: uh i do fight me

nopeaz: square up bitch

hbicheryl: if i had a dollar for every time tt and sp said that they were going to fight i would have enough money to rebuild thornhill

goingtoheller: cheryl, you're the one who burned it down in the first place.

hbicheryl: yes and??

goingtoheller: ...nevermind.

hisshissmotherfucker: im snoRTING

jugheadalones: what happened?

hisshissmotherfucker: so veronica was talking to one of her relatives right

hisshissmotherfucker: and the relative asks her if she has a boyfriend

hisshissmotherfucker: veronica laughs a little and says no so her relative looks at betty whos still trailing behind her like a shadow

hisshissmotherfucker: and knowingly says "oh i see, a girlfriend"

spillthefogarTEA: ajklfshagak i cant even

hisshissmotherfucker: both of them are sputtering uncontrollably unable to formulate a response im dying

hbicheryl: ahahah it was only a matter of time before something like this happened but im really glad it did

nopeaz: i mean relatives are supposed to know you better than anyone else right?

jugheadalones: oh b&v you oblivious wlw

goingtoheller: we're never letting them let this down, are we?

spillthefogarTEA: not a chance

hisshissmotherfucker: IT GOT BETTER

hisshissmotherfucker: veronica finally managed to speak and she (unconvincingly) insisted that she and betty were just friends etc etc and her relative just raised her eyebrows and went "mmhm"

nopeaz: drag themmmmm

hbicheryl: omg we stan

hisshissmotherfucker: im trying to stifle my laughter bc betty and veronica look like they want to murder me

hisshissmotherfucker: but you know what screw it its worth it

hisshissmotherfucker: oh shit bettys coming over here and she looks pissed

hisshissmotherfucker: hello punks, this is betty. i hope youve had your fun listening to sweet pea narrate everything but now im taking his phone and wont be giving it back until the party starts

[hisshissmotherfucker is offline]

jugheadalones: awww

goingtoheller: at least the party starts soon anyway. then, i'm sure we'll get even more beronica fodder.

jugheadalones: true

hbicheryl: see you then losers

spillthefogarTEA: back at ya cheryl

7:48 PM

nopeaz: cher and i are on our way

goingtoheller: fangs and i are leaving now.

jugheadalones: and im at your door at this very moment

jugheadalones: let me in

jugheadalones: okay great im in

hisshissmotherfucker: and i just got my phone back

hisshissmotherfucker: i will not stand for this tyranny! this is a republic not a monarchy!

wannabett: keep it up and im taking your phone back

hisshissmotherfucker: the oppression continues...

wannabett: sweet pea...

hisshissmotherfucker: fine

[hisshissmotherfucker is offline]

veroffica: now, let's get this party started!

10:03 PM

spillthefogarTEA: hey guys i know this is fun and exciting and all but would you mind congregating out in the living room? ive got some news

hisshissmotherfucker: anything for my best bro

jugheadalones: sure thing

10:07 PM

hisshissmotherfucker + theMANtle

hisshissmotherfucker: hey mantle are you free rn

theMANtle: yeah, you want me to come over to your trailer?

hisshissmotherfucker: yep im on my way there too

hisshissmotherfucker: see you in ten?

theMANtle: none of your friends will be there, right?

hisshissmotherfucker: nah theyre all still at veronicas party they wont even notice that im gone

theMANtle: not that im complaining, but why arent you?

hisshissmotherfucker: i needed a break

theMANtle: so you were hoping that i could help you blow off some steam? ;)

hisshissmotherfucker: that was the general idea

theMANtle: youre in luck, then. i currently have a lot of free time and what many call an impressive amount of stamina.

hisshissmotherfucker: perfect

[hisshissmotherfucker is offline]

10:15 PM

gays united

spillthefogarTEA: hey has anyone seen sweet pea? i could have sworn that i saw him before kevin and i made our announcement but now i cant find him anywhere

nopeaz: hes probably just in the bathroom or brooding in the corner somewhere

hbicheryl: dont worry about him just celebrate! youve officially got a new boyfriend!

spillthefogarTEA: "dont worry about him" have you MET me??

goingtoheller: babe, he probably just got bored and bailed.

goingtoheller: i know that he's your best friend, but he isn't who you're dating--i am. can't you forget about sweet pea for a little while and just relax?

spillthefogarTEA: i guess so

goingtoheller: great!

spillthefogarTEA: ill just text sp real quick and attempt to verify that hes still alive first

goingtoheller: whatever you need to do, fangs. i'll see you afterward.

10:19 PM

spillthefogarTEA + hisshissmotherfucker

spillthefogarTEA: hey sweets, i just wanted to make sure you didnt do anything stupid

spillthefogarTEA: i know that you arent kevins biggest fan, but youre my best friend and i dont want to lose you over him

spillthefogarTEA: i wish you were here to celebrate with me but i get it if you cant

spillthefogarTEA: please, just text me back whenever you see this to let me know that youre okay.

[spillthefogarTEA is offline]

10:41 PM

hisshissmotherfucker: thanks for being so understanding fangs but ngl i dont know if i can handle you dating keller

hisshissmotherfucker: i mean like you said

hisshissmotherfucker: we're best friends

hisshissmotherfucker: so i shouldnt have a problem with you going out with whoever you want

hisshissmotherfucker: but something about him just rubs me the wrong way

hisshissmotherfucker: sorry if that wasnt what you wanted to hear

[hisshissmotherfucker is offline]

Notes: Sorry, this was supposed to just be a long holiday chapter, but I had so many ideas I had to split it into two. Bear with me, please! Also, happy new year, gays! As 20gayteen comes to a close, I hope you find even more peace, prosperity, and (of course) bisexuality in 20biteen!!

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magioftheseas · 5 years

Text

Day 1 - Reserve

Written for @the-hinata-project

Prompt: Reserve Course Student Hinata

Rating: G

Warnings: Lowkey manipulation and insecurity, but other than that, not much.

Notes: Alright, so I’m still in the middle of these, but like... Here’s the first one! They’re all going to be pretty short, around 2K but I’m gonna do my best to finish all of them so wish me luck...! And this first fic is gen. No ships. Next ones won’t be so gen. It’s also pre-HPA. Kind of.

***Alternate Ao3 Link***

Commission? Donate?

The last wish he made on New Year’s was a simple one.

I want to get into Hope’s Peak.

But of course that would never happen.

“Can’t you dream more realistically, Hajime? Do you have any idea how expensive Hope’s Peak actually is? We can’t afford that.”

“I... I know that, but...”

“If you know then why are you burdening us with this? Please. Just think about other people besides yourself for once.”

“...sorry.”

His mother sighs, but ruffles his hair in a show of affection.

“You current high school isn’t so bad, right? You can make good friends here, and it’s a fine school.”

“I guess it’s...decent,” he mumbles.

“Just don’t even worry about Hope’s Peak anymore,” she tells him. “It’s impossible, and it can’t be helped. Keep your chin up. Okay?”

“...fine...”

Because he knew, after all, that she had a point. They couldn’t afford it. And he wasn’t talented. It was a pipe dream to attend. Nothing more. Nothing less.

Still...

For his birthday, he was given a new laptop to replace the old. It was a fairly recent model. Pretty expensive. Likely compensation. He can’t say he didn’t like it.

He wasn’t ungrateful. He doesn’t think so.

It’s just that I admire Hope’s Peak more than anything.

So much so that he finds himself on the forums first thing.

>Does anyone have any idea who’s going to be in the upcoming batch?

>They haven’t finished scouting, right? Oh, but I just saw on the news that an actual princess was accepted! Hope’s Peak really can get in anyone!

>Wow, actual royalty?!

>There’s this photographer I follow. She’s getting in, too, I’m pretty sure.

>I just saw Saionji Hiyoko-san’s performance last week. I’m positive she’s getting in.

>I’m more interested in the princess. Can you imagine how lucky it would be to meet an actual princess?

>>They’ll be running the lottery in a month or so. What I would give to have more of a chance...

>Wow, they’re doing that again?

>With how much getting into the reserve course costs, you probably have a better chance with the lottery...

>But if you win the lottery, you’re actually considered talented. Reserves are just...y’know, reserves.

>But you’ll get to meet the princess, potentially. I think the money’s worth it, even if all I can do is steal a glance!

>Still... Seems so lame that you can just pay your way in...

>But brand name recognition is pretty powerful...

>>I heard you can actually get into the main course from the reserve course if you do well enough.

>No way! That’s a pipe dream! Maybe if you paid like, twice as much!

>Must be nice to be rich, huh...

Hinata stares, wondering what to type, but also letting the thoughts swirl around in his head.

>>I would do anything to get into Hope’s Peak. But my family just can’t afford that.

>Yeah, mine neither. Who actually can?

>You’d be surprised... They’re getting a lot of enrollments.

>You can’t like...get a scholarship or anything? It’s not like you need to go to college after attending Hope’s Peak.

>Well the golden gates can’t open that wide, I suppose...

>It’s for the best. If just about anyone could get in, it wouldn’t be that special.

Hinata bites his lip, picking at the peeling skin with his teeth.

>>Still. I want to get in more than anything.

>If you aren’t talented, it can’t be helped.

>>I would give anything.

>Pffft. No kidding. I’d give an arm and a leg, probably.

>>I would give anything.

>A lot of people would.

>You’re like a super fan, huh. Well, I am, too, but still...

>>Getting into Hope’s Peak has always been my dream.

>Everyone wants to be special, man.

>But if everyone was special then no one would be special.

>It can’t be helped. You’re either born talented or you aren’t.

>Right?! I must have spent hours drawing but there was always that one person I could just never compare to. It’s hopeless!

>You shouldn’t say hopeless on the Hope’s Peak forums!

>Haha, sorry!

>>I’ve never been talented. There’s not one thing I’m particularly good at.

>Normie...

>>But I want to get into Hope’s Peak Academy... More than anything.

>Give it up. For your own good. Wishing for the impossible isn’t healthy.

>Hey, don’t tell him that! What if he ends up winning the lottery?

>Yeah, right!

>>I’m not particularly lucky, either.

>Luck’s not a talent anyway.

>Are you sure? I’ve known people who get ridiculously lucky while gambling...

>If they gamble too much, that luck’s bound to run out. And I bet they’re not that lucky, they just brag a lot.

>That might be true... Still it would be nice just to get into Hope’s Peak by chance...

>Whoever wins that lottery probably is ridiculously lucky considering how many people are participating. We’re talking like, every high school student in their first year in the country.

>Sucks to be other countries, huh.

>Maybe someday but for now, I like not having that much competition.

>Still a ridiculous amount competing...

>I bet it’ll be someone who can afford the reserve course if they haven’t already enrolled.

>No fair! That kind of thing should disqualify you immediately!

>>I just...want to get in...

>Yeah we all do. But it’s impossible.

>Impossible.

>Totally impossible.

>Pigs will fly first.

>I heard some Ultimates actually can make some crazy shit. We might see flying pigs pretty soon.

>That’s terrifying.

>>I just want to get in.

>You should get offline.

He should. He really, really should.

Is it really impossible?

“Of course it is,” he can practically hear them murmur. “Not only are you untalented, you can’t afford it! And you’re going to win the lottery, either!”

Hinata buries his face into his hands, shuddering.

I just... I just...

To his surprise, he later receives a DM. Shivering, he clicks it open.

>Would you really do anything for Hope’s Peak?

He doesn’t recognize the name of the sender but...it looks official.

>>Yes. Of course. Why?

>There actually is a program you can sign up for that will get you in without having to pay a coin.

Hinata blinked once. Twice.

It’s way too good to be true.

But he’s desperate. Beyond desperate.

>>What is this program? How can I sign up?

>Here’s the information.

What he’s about to do is how people get themselves abducted, he’s pretty sure. But right now, he’s desperate and... If it really was someone associated with Hope’s Peak, how bad can it be? What’s the worse than can happen?

I already have no chance getting in. I know that... But...

His heart was pounding as he took the train. He stared out the window, at HPA’s towering buildings in the distance, getting closer and closer, and he sucks in his breath.

It’s so shining that it hurts to look at.

Shining like a dream...

“Ah, Hinata-kun, you made it after all. So you have the necessary information?”

“Uh... Yes...” Truth be told, he didn’t understand most of it. There were a lot of words that were hard to read and pretty...advanced. “I just...well you said you couldn’t explain everything in just files, so...”

The other looked pretty professional. Sharply dressed and smiling in a way that at least seemed pretty welcoming. But...still pretty intimidating, considering the circumstances. Hinata ducked his head, feeling rather flustered.

“Yes, it’s meant to be kept very tightly under wraps, you see,” they laugh. “I need to assure confidentiality before explaining, Hinata-kun. Surely you understand.”

That’s...weird.

But it made his blood thrum with excitement to be a part of.

“I... Y-Yes, of course. Absolutely... Of course...”

“Sign this form, then, promising that.”

“O-Of course...!”

He scribbles down his signature without a second thought. The other smiled more, pleased. Hinata squirmed in his seat, and tried to keep his posture straight.

With that, the other sat across from him, polite and yet...expectant.

Ah... Hah...

“So you’re willing to do anything for this school,” they say, voice almost light but also dense with significance. “Might I ask why?”

“It’s...as I said on the forums,” Hinata mumbles, fiddling with his tie. Even dressed professionally for this would-be interview, he feels underdressed. “I’ve always admired this school. Always. It’s always been my dream to...to go there...”

The other nods, expression unchanged.

“And why do you wish so badly to go there, despite not having a talent that can be cultivated?”

Hinata flinched.

“T-That’s...! I...” He hesitates, but he soon finds the words just spilling out. “I just want to be someone I can be proud of. Someone who can stand tall. Be confident. Be significant. Isn’t that what I deserve?”

“Isn’t that what everyone deserves?”

Hinata’s nails dig into his palms.

“I admire Hope’s Peak...more than anyone. I will give whatever I can...and then more than that...if I have to.” His teeth grit. “Whatever it takes... W-Whatever it takes...!”

Even though I know it’s selfish and impossible, I just...!

He just wanted to be someone. Someone other than...this.

Unimportant. Unremarkable. A faceless, meaningless part of the mass. The idea of being consumed by mediocrity and insignificance for the rest of his life, never to matter, never to even be remembered, just to disappear, just like he never even existed—

“I’ll do...w-whatever...it takes...” He’s shaking, eyes wide and crazed. “Whatever it takes... Whatever I can...and then more than that...if I have to.”

“Ah. I see.” An easy smile. And yet, the atmosphere felt so heavy that it was near suffocating. “Very well then, Hinata-kun. That’s exactly the kind of attitude we’re looking for.”

Hinata lit up.

“R-Really?” He dares to let hope slip into his tone. “D-Do you really mean it?”

A nod.

“Hinata-kun... If you could be reborn from the faceless body of a miserable nobody into the world’s hope... Would you?”

“That...sounds too good to be true...” His heart really was racing, but he was flushed with excitement. “But... Y-Yeah... I... Of course...”

“Then, allow me to tell you about how that can be possible. If you agree, you’ll be accepted into the school, free of charge, no talent necessary. In fact, it’s even essential that you be talentless.”

I...don’t understand.

He doesn’t understand but it just sounds so incredible that he can’t help but be swayed.

“...tell me.”

“Very well.”

A folder of files is placed before him. They look too important to grasp. And the stamped out letters of CONFIDENTIAL stare back into his wide-eyed, shimmering gaze.

Fingers trembling, Hinata actually slices his finger open as he flips it open.

He doesn’t even feel the sting, as engrossed as he is in the text.

“I...”

The words swirl around in his head, over and over until he drowns in them.

“Do you need time to think about it?” the other asks him kindly. So kindly that Hinata is struck cold. “Tell you what... You can still get into the reserve course. You don’t have to say yes right away, and the deadline will be in a few months from now. You can attend classes here until then...and then make your decision on whether or not you’re willing to stay. Okay?”

“I... O-Okay.” Hinata swallows. “That’s... I’m okay with that.”

I said I’d do anything. And I do...want to do anything. But...

His hands are shaking while still gripping the files.

I can’t...let this chance slip by...even if it’s something like this. This is everything I ever wanted. Why am I even hesitating?

“It’s alright,” the other says reassuringly, taking the files away with ease. “Hinata-kun, I know you’ll make the best decision for yourself.”

For...myself. Myself...

“I...yes.”

“I’ll have them send in your acceptance letter and uniform.” His hand is shook, the grip warm and calloused. “It was a pleasure meeting you, Hinata-kun.”

“A-A pleasure... Yeah.”

Just like that, Hinata was stumbling out of Hope’s Peak, trembling and falling to pieces with every shaky step.

I have to do it, he can’t help but think. I have to do it, for...for myself...

This was going to be the year his life changed irreparably. He was sure of it.

#thehinataproject #hajime hinata #hinata hajime #Magi fics #the hinata project #although it's not going to show up #I might as well #I'll probably have to message someone anyway #The tragedy of being muted

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shhh-no-ones-home · 6 years

Text

spring cleaning 1/2 hank McCoy x reader

+++++++++

Your mutation: imagine wolverine but you don't have claws or a metal skeleton. Instead of those you have super strength. The strength was a natural mutation but the healing factor and almost immortality was a result of pre WWII experimentation. After the war you were sent to Russia to train with the first black widow sector and the Winter soldier project where you were trained to rarely ever sleep and withstand days of no food or water fighting for your life protecting whoever you were assigned to.

It had its ups and downs in your new life but mostly you just found yourself wandering around X mansion or reading, or helping Hank in the lab since he rarely ever slept if he was working on a new project.

Song: I'll let you down by Frnkiero andthe patience

+++++++++

It had been a quiet night at the mansion but everyone wanted to get a goodnight sleep cause they would need to be up early for spring cleaning. Charles had issued a much needed spring break in order to get some rest in after their latest missions and to get everyone back in order again. obviously you just sat up all night staring out your window making a plan of what you would be cleaning when the morning finally arrived. After about 3am you decided you were going to go downstairs and see if Hank was up and needed any help with anything. You grabbed your leather jacket swinging it over you shoulder and made your way into the hall. You decided to walk down to his room to see if he was there first, upon finding an empty room you made your way downstairs to his lab.

When you opened the door to Hanks lab you heard a loud clattering noise followed by a grunt and "shit." You walked further to the noise only to be met with an angry blue Hank. He was pacing around putting various chemicals together making explosions and causing different beakers to change colors. You then coughed a little which caused him to look up at you. He wasnt very fazed at first but then he realized it was really you standing at the other end of his lab. It caused him to stand, knocking over the chair he was perched on. He then backed up looking at it scratching the back of his furry head.

"Is everything okay Hank?"

"Uh.."

He patted his lab coat and pulled out one of his syringes and looked at it before stabbing it into his leg and slowly transforming back into his human looking self.

"Yeah, better now."

"Hank are you sure? You seem kinda out of it."

"Yeah I'm completely fine. What's up?"

"I just wanted to know if you needed help with anything, ya know.... maybe some heavy lifting."

I winked at him and he turned into his normal awkward self, blushing and avoiding eye contact.

"Uh no I-i don't think so. I'm pretty good, wrapped up down here. So uh....Yeah."

"Okay well do you mind if I just sit down here with you for a little while? I don't wanna take a chance at waking anyone up if I go back upstairs, it's not even 4 yet?"

"Yeah go right ahead. Um could I take you up on that heavy lifting offer? There's some work I need to do on the X-jet."

"Sure no problem. Lead the way."

I motioned to the door and followed him to the hanger. The entire time we worked he kept shifting his eyes. It was like he didn't want to look at me but he had too. He had to see me to know what i was doing and to show me how to help him. At one point I even lifted him up to reach a part of the jet. Once I put him down he was more than flustered and couldn't speak without stuttering or mumbling. As much as I hated to say it, he was cute. He was beyond smart, and the glasses eccentuating his bright blue eyes drove me crazy. I had tried flirting with him before but it always ended the same and he acted now just as he acted then. I wasn't even trying right now but I still managed to fluster him. Once we were done working on the jet and decided to take a break it was about 8 am. All of the students should have been getting up about now to eat and work on their spring cleaning duty's.

I was sat on one of the metal tables that had various tools on it watching Hank tinker with different parts. It was nice to watch him, not in a creepy way, but in a 'im curious about you, date me' kind of way. Everything he did seemed so complicated but he made it work. His brain was extraordinary, he was extraordinary. Im not gonna lie, if he asked I would probably let him do whatever he wanted with me, but- my thoughts were shaken at a sudden and loud fire alarm going off. One of the parts Hank had set down combusted and the smoke was rising. It wasn't a large flame but as soon as Hank got it out the sprinklers went off. He ran over to me, soaking wet, to set the part that had caught fire on the table I was sat at. It was a strange happening that the two of us thought funny. The sprinklers didn't seem to be shutting off anytime soon so we just sat there and laughed about the odd event that had just happened. He had a cute laugh, and the water droplets dripping from his hair made my knees weak. I guess it was a good thing I was sitting on the table.

Hank then got super close to me, stood right next to my leg. I wasn't sure what to do at first but then everything seemed right. He looked at me, in the eyes, for the first time all morning. I took his speckled glasses off of his face causing him to squint a bit at me. I set them to the side and grabbed his face gently so he wouldn't tilt his head. I leaned in and planted a long soft kiss on his bright pink lips. He seemed a little hesitant at first as if he couldn't believe it was actually happening. He then moved himself in-between my legs and grabbed the back of my neck with one hand and the other landing on my waist deepening the soft kiss. When we broke apart for air he rested his forehead against mine and smiled the biggest smile.

"Wow"

"Wow is right, you have no idea how long I've wanted to do that Hank."

He just looked down, a blush creeping to his wet face. I tilted his chin up to look at me and kissed him again. I never wanted it to end but it sadly did when Erik ran into the hanger to make sure we were okay. When we pulled apart Hank hid his face in my neck and wet hair, laughing a bit, hugging my waist lightly. I placed one hand on his back and the other in his hair, sending a slight glare Erik's way.

"So I take it you two are fine then."

"Yes Erik, everything is peachy. We caused the fire but it's out now so we're good."

"I see, I'll let you get back to your work then."

After he left I looked at Hank in the eyes again and we both just laughed. This would be something we remembered for a while.

#wattpad #hank mccoy #x reader #beast #xmen #marvel

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tumblunni · 6 years

Text

OH FUCK U GUYS SHOULD I BUY ALL THE KINDGOM HEARTS IN A ONCENESS???

Holy jesus i knew they did hd ps4 ports of the playstation games but they ALSO added all the final mix content that engkishspeaking fans never got during my childhood? And they ALSO remade chain of memories entireky in 3d with Very Animated Ice Dad?? And they ALSO remade BBS despite it not needing it nearly as much as the old games and thet ALSO remade friggin dream drop distance which came out on a goddamn current gen console?? Like they seriously just made a non portable version?? Now all the spinoffs are on the same console at last?? Why did you not just do this in the first place?? I mean the psp and 3ds games were basically ps2 equivelant graphics and disc space anyway...

Oh and fuckin ALLLLSOOOOO

Also the final mixes of all of those! Also a movie version of the plot of khux! And also Coded and Days, which is a really big shame cos Coded is indeed sparse enough on content to deserve it but Days was my FAVOURITE GAME and it sucks its the only one that didnt get remade! I mean its in the same spinoff category as bbs and com, its not a cheapo mess like coded. Nothing else in the series deserves to be shoved in the Coded bin, even khux at least has better plot even if the backtracking and lootbox shit makes it harder to get to it...

Anyway ALSO a random new sidestory with Aqua going thru like one dungeon or somethin?? I dunno?? Its like a glorified tech demo for kh3, its just 'hey fuckin look what we can do visually on a proper ps4 game' and wow how have i never fuckin heard of this it looks so pretty!! I mean i dont know if its even more than 5 hours or somethin but.. Pretty!! And apparantly you get unlockable costumes for her or somethin? I hope they keep that feature in kh3! Itd rock if it wasnt just the main character too, and we could dress up riku and kairi and goofy and donald and roxas and axel and every the friends :3 new secret to how they defeat xehanort: slap a bow on his damn head

ALSO ALSO

All of this is available in one big bundle pack for £90 which ALSO contains literally kh3. THIS IS HOW THEYRE HANDLING PREORDERS?? THATS SUCH A GOOD WAY TO HANDLE PREORDERS!! Get a discounted price on this new game but while youre waiting for it you get to enjoy an (also discounted) giant fuckin 300 hours memory lane compilation of every damn thing from the last 15 years in one beautiful updated package. Holy fuck its like they made this for ME SPECIFICALLY!this is the perfect way to get people back into the franchise who dropped off in The Great KH3 Wait cos they couldnt afford all the damn million portables needed to gather that Dank Lore. God fuckin hell it cost more than the price of this bundle just to play any one of those games individually on some stupid retro machine i bought exclusively for that one damn game. THAT PSP STILL ROTS IN MY KITCHEN CUPBOARD YO

So so so so so

Guys

Please give me permission to buy this

Or like please convince me not to waste my money if you think i'd waste my money??

I really just DONT KNOW! ive been out of the fandom for so long and my last experience was really hatting BBS and feeling horribly out of place as everyone else raved about it being the best thing ever. And i know NOTHING about what kh3 is gonna be or whether its even possible for me to get back into the fandom and like.. Care about it at all again. I just got fuckin fatigued with it and my teenage years were like me clinging on to the edge of a cliff by my fingernails begging everyone to believe me that Its Still Good, Honestly, Its Worth It while square enix is up there all LONG LIVE THE KING and they push me off. Into a stampede of PSPs. Somehow.

And then aaargh i know i literally only came back to the fandom because organization xiii fuckin eternally holds my heart in their lil grabby hands. It was indeed a good nostalgic moment remembering how i loved them! And getting a new appreciation for Vexen and being blown away by how much he should have been my favourite but i just never got to play COM as a kid and then when i played it as an adult all the way after bbs i ended up quitting before even getting to meet half the org cos this one stupid 'defeat 99 shadows jn 99 seconds' mission kicked my ass. I'M JUST NOT GOOD AT ACTION RPGS OKAY!

Aaaagh thats another Big Worry, yknow? Like asa kid i was Bad, as an adult i'm Barely Better , and as a both i never enjoyed beat em up thingies of any kind at all. And on top of that i was never big into disney, i never saw them as any sort of 'childhood magic' but just some naff cliche shit retelling public domain fairy tales in the safest way possible with a bunch of obnoxious celebrity cameos. Also lion king and snow white terrified me as a kid. Also i associated robin hood with my dead grandma. Also as a kid i couldnt appreciate good artistic ability or voiceacting, i was all about the story, yknow? And most of kh's adaptations are really rushed and barebones versions of an already shoddy story, without any of the visual splendor. ALSO i never saw any of the darker or more emotionally focused stuff like Hunchback and Beauty and the Beast until way after i quit playing kingdom hearts, oddly enough. Wtf beauty and thebeast is actually real good and looks so far beyond its time!! Wtf hunchback has my goddamn evil dad in it!! Why did i miss the only good didneys!! Why did snow white traumatize me and those didnt!!

ANYWAY the point im getting at is that im not inherantly predisposed to like.. Any of kingdom hearts's appeal at all. I didnt know half the disneys and i didnt have any hype for the others. None of my fave final fantasy games made it into it until the sequel and then never again after that. CMON I CANT JUST DEAL WITH ONE VIVI CAMEO Y'ALL! And i haaaate the genre and its an uphill struggle to play a game like that with my stupid inelegant sausage hands. So i just came for the story and then everything after the first game has been conspiring to ruin it for me, sheesh! I felt so much for that short concise self contained first episode and then i fall more and more out of love as they establish this status quo of everything being retconnable so dont bother get attatched to it. Blablabla the entire worldbuilding is different now and everyone was secretly someone else and please memorize a bunch of shit from fifty fuckin spinoffs and also time travel and cloning suddenly exist and ALSO Grandpa Onlyblackmanintheworld is generic motiveless evil and everything was him even of it looked like it was actually a sympathetic villain. *insert dio meme face*

So yeah now im just.. In it for the characters?? And the cute art style and monsters and lovely animations and big fanfic oc potentials stuff. But man even tho i had Big Feel for those things i was able to completely drop it all and forget about the series for years, that was just HOW BAD the kh3 drought was. Steven universe hiatus eat your heart out...

So ffff i dont even KNOW if i'll be able to get feels'd for these characters again or if they actually hold up to modern bunni standards of huggable. And i know all the ones i want to hug the most got like zero sympathy and all died horribly and were also retroactively revealed to be clone oldmanvirus somethingy and aaaaaagh. But also something something people say they all came back and got cured?? And this is why?? I am here?? Again?? And buying?? The thing??

Like man fuck i am already building it up so much in my head aaaa what if i dont actually love axel as much as i used to love axel and i dont love Grumply Science as much as i always love That Character Archetype seriously MAN how was he like THE ONLY ONE I DIDNT GET TO SEE AS A KID

Aaauuuuaggh gahhh like maybe this will reignite my passion for the series or maybe i'll just be all critical and dumb and waste all my moneys

Guys... What do??

#tho i mean i did see the five seconds of vexen u get in days and i know generally what he's like from wikis and fanart #i just mean that i dont know how he really is in his actual starring game and whether any of the sympathetic dadness is canon #plz do #i wanna cry for dad #i mean u made me suddenly cry for saix and ship him with axel as soon as all that stuff was revealed in bbs #i also never finished bbs so i dont know how much we got to learn about apprentice era vexen and baby zexion #like is it actually canon that vexen was his fathee figure? do you actyally see them being cute?#or are people just theorizing?#its so hard to know whats theories in this fandom cos when u waited for a sequel for almost a decade there are a lot of theories lol

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bwicblog · 6 years

Text

>KUANFU: Bother Alexar.

After Kuanfu starts bragging about sleeping with Kyviar, one of Alexar's terrifying exes - and matesprit at that time - in the public chat, Alexar gets curious and tries to ask Kua his name and age. Kua responds by lying, requesting the same - and taking it to PMs when Alexar won't give him the answers he wants.

-- ayeayeCaptain [AC] is now messaging grantonCleaver [GC]! --

AC: haha, holy shit, what a name. GC: {uh} AC: i was totally going to make a joke, but you know what, dude? no. no, that's pretty cool. AC: good on you. bloodthirsty.. but adorable. adorabloodthirsty? man, my name feels totally lame, now. AC: but wait, shit, let's stay on topic. AC: how are you? GC: {uh} GC: {im fine} GC: {just you know} GC: {chillin} GC: {uh how about you} AC: awww, dude. am i making you nervous? because that is, like, totally not my intentions here. i am sorry. AC: i am currently raiding a boat! i should be doing paperwork while i am stuck down here, but. well. AC: there's nothing like the wind in your hair and blood on your deck, right? GC: {dude i dont think i know your name beyond kua and weve had like one conversation} GC: {i dont know why youre messaging me right now} AC: huh, the uh's cleared up pretty quick. AC: and i am pretty sure we have had way more than one conversation, dude. AC: isn't that why you were asking my name? GC: {pretty sure we havent} GC: {and i was just curious} AC: dude, you are so rude. like, on every level. and i know i should not take it personally, but at the same time, i am kind of hurt, considering i have been nothing but really friendly and helpful. AC: what flarp group are you part of?(edited) GC: {uh i dont remember its been ages and we changed captains and names a ton} GC: {i think once we were something like the raging boars once or something or other} GC: {yknow just flarp stuff} GC: {why} AC: because kyviar was kind of a huge fucking monster, so it's sort of weird anyone was hanging around discussing her schticks. AC: or did you all just, like, have a thing for genocidal mutants?(edited) GC: {well i mean you sort of answered your own question} GC: {she was a huge fucking monster who was a genocidal mutant} GC: {so you tell me how that didnt get the fuck around} AC: i gotta say, i never sat around talking about what the leviathan's get are up to, with their giant murder snake. everyone's always just been like "oh, shit, it's a giant snake and their horrible owner!" AC: not, like, "oh, damn, let's discuss the means of their murdering everything they can put their pink hands on!" AC: but don't get me wrong, that's a cool hobby. AC: what all did you hear about her? GC: {uh well} GC: {first of all i dont really see why youre asking me about all of this like i was just a shitty pirate flarper okay like i did that for a few sweeps and then ducked out and now i work in a bakery} GC: {second of all well i mean i heard a bunch} GC: {heard she was a mutant and wasnt afraid of it and usually tried to get people to kill her i heard she slaughtered nearly every town she went through unless they could pay up money} GC: {heard she liked to paint things black to match her blood and set shit on fire} GC: {you know the basics} AC: i don't know, dude. why'd you ask me my age and name, then refuse to give yours? AC: it makes people curious! GC: {because i was trying to remember if she had any allies or anything and that was what like} GC: {ages ago or something right} AC: and oh jeez, that's a lot. holy shit, you're a big fan. probably for the best you never met her, she'd have been so mad. GC: {at least three sweeps before she disappeared off the waters} GC: {didnt she get killed or something} GC: {its a bit murky} AC: haha, where'd you hear that? GC: {rumors} AC: nah, dude, she's totally still tooling around in space, like everyone our age. and she totally had allies! loads and loads of them. AC: but i guess that didn't get put down on your creepy fansites, right? GC: GC: {seriously?} AC: uhhh. AC: i said like three things there, dude. GC: {shes still fucking alive?} AC: haha, why do you care? GC: {shes a blackblooded mutant who got her kicks off of pirating and killing people the fact that shes still kicking it is baffling}(edited) AC: half of us got our kicks off of pirating and killing people, i just don't think that's very outstanding. GC: {you know what i mean} AC: you know what, i totally don't. AC: could you explain? GC: {wow okay fine} GC: {let me bold it} GC: {blackblooded mutant} GC: {still alive} GC: {kicking it} AC: because just between the two of us, i have to admit, i kind of am sur AC: oh shit, hold on, someone gave this pupa a gun and that's just unnecessary. GC: {haha what} AC: there we go! AC: sorry, we are back from these brief technical difficulties. AC: and it's not that weird, dude, she shouldn't have even got out of the caverns. GC: {did you just cull the shit out of a pupa while talking to me} AC: but tell you what! since you are such a fan, and you are so flabbergasted, i will AC: AC: what the fuck, no. AC: why would you even ask that? GC: {i am currently raiding a boat! there's nothing like the wind in your hair and blood on your deck, right? } AC: what sort of an asshole kills pupas? GC: {kyviar did and didnt you bang her} AC: no, i put him in the hold, and someone will put his lusus in there with him when they find it. jeez. AC: what i was going to say, before you hopped on that awful train of thought, was: AC: tell you what, i bet i could totally get you her autograph for your weird planetary fanclub, if you want. GC: {uh} GC: {sure why not} AC: great! who should she sign it to? GC: {just do gc that works well enough} AC: yeah, no, i am not going to go up to her and be like hey, please don't shoot me, i have a great idea! why don't you sign this photo and put it to gc? AC: i definitely am not going to smudge out a line and make it ac, so i can keep it on my mantle like a creep. AC: that is just something i would never do. GC: {fuck fine okay} GC: {put down something like idk} GC: {ronado} AC: you want an autograph from her to.. a fake name. AC: okay, wow, you are just steadily making this weirder. GC:{oh yeah sure im making this weird!} AC: i did not think that was possible, but that's okay. you've achieved it. good job, i think, except imagine I am totally saying that in the most concerned way possible. AC: jeez, dude, can't you even let me fujoshi transcribing before you're interrupting? GC: AC: finish. GC: {fu} GC: {fujoshi} GC: {okay so now youre the one making it weird here} AC: look, it gets ahead of itself, sometimes. GC: {you just took it into weird territory} AC: why do you even know what that word means? GC: {should i be getting an ash in here to help moderate things i feel like im being poorly pitchflirted with now} AC: i don't know what it means. AC: also, ew. i am sixteen, thanks. GC: {yeah so youre only sixteen} AC: only sixteen? AC: well, shit, how old are your usual pitchflirts? GC: {uh like ten and up usually} GC: {i dont date pupas} AC: haha, wow, i thought you were a pupa, dude. AC: are you saying you are not actually eight? GC: {no im not eight thank you very much} AC: so you are older than ten. AC: but younger than sixteen? GC: {why do i feel like im getting interrogated here} GC: {quit it!} GC: {why are you so interested in me!} AC: well, you accused me of terrible pitchflirting, dude. if that's the case, i can actually pitchflirt, and defend my pitchy honor, but i will feel morally questionable if you're under eleven.(edited) AC: that is just my own personal standards. GC: {take your pitchflirting elsewhere} GC: {im good in my quads} GC: {thank you im flattered youre interested} GC: {hit me up in like a sweep or two maybe ill have a free quad then idk idek} AC: haha, okay, you're making this weird again. GC: {you made it weird} AC: but i am starting to think that's your specialty, so that's okay. AC: you accused me of pitchflirting, man. badly. AC: all i am doing is asking questions about someone who is a creepy fan of someone that i knew, and attempting to further the fun social connection we have built. AC: after all, you have my name, my age, my creepy pirate pal's name, and my hobbies, i just thought it would be nice to know something about you, too. GC: {ok how about this we just kind of take all of this weird pitchflirty goodness and shove it into a box and close up the box and duct tape it shut and i dont know} AC: doubledots sad underscore face doubledots GC: {throw it into an industrial blender and move on} GC: GC: {what} GC: {double dots} AC: holy shit, how can i pitchflirt with you over the internet? i am not even fucking with you, i am genuinely curious. GC: { :_(: ?} GC: {oh wait} AC: like, i don't know what you look like. you could be hideous. GC: { :sad_face: }(edited) AC: no, you know - AC: yes! GC: {it doesnt fucking work} AC: yes, so why do you keep assuming it? GC: { :cry: } GC: {is that what youre trying to make} GC: {because its : cry :} AC: i don't want it crying. you do not, sadly, invoke that much emotion. GC: {also what did i just fucking say} AC: i want it frowning. GC: {put the weird pitchflirting in the box and sacrifice it to the blender} GC: {no if ands or buts} AC: AC: AC: i am not AC: AC: i am genuinely just very thrown right now! i don't even know what to say! like, honestly, i am supposed to be checking the last areas, but instead, i am standing here, one hand on my mouth, kind of just marvelling at the sheer levels of what the fuck i am feeling right now. GC: {what did i just fucking say} AC: i am not pitchflirting, holy shit. AC: what do i have to do to convince you this is entirely platonic overtures of friendship and camadery? GC: {stop being weird at me} AC: okay, fine. AC: are you going to continue hiding your name like a huge weird coward? GC: {whats yours} AC: mighty. GC: {ronado} AC: dude, you flat out admitted that is not your name. GC: {dont fucking diss my name} AC: so now we have moved onto weirdo coward who can't lie. GC: {what the fuck} AC: that is cool, i will totally just ask someone else. i'm sure someone in here knows it, right? GC: {ill go asking around too why dont i} AC: yes, sure, go ask aa. i have been pretty consistent with the mighty thing. given, you know, it is my name. AC: it's funny how not lying works.

Kuanfu does, in fact, go to ask someone else - Merrem, over in #highbloods.

AC: hey, what's gc's name? AC: if you don't know who that is, he is one of the greens.(edited) CC: who. AC: iunno, he's one of the jades! hackon cleaver. AC: wait, no, it has a g. AC: grafting cleaner? AC: grafting.. cleaver. AC: there we go, that sounds right. CC: ...huh. CC: no fucking idea who that is. CC: let me go and back read that for you. CC: aint like ive got a thing to do thats better. CC: ...why you wanna know? AC: see, this is why you are my favourite person in this chat, as of this exact moment, right now. AC: he keeps asking me questions and then, like, refusing to answer mine? it's really rude. AC: and weird. AC: he also said i am pitchflirting, and, wow, no. how are you supposed to pitchflirt on the internet, merrem? AC: it just doesn't work. AC: that's how you end up in a back alley with scabies. AC: that is a bad end. CC: damn. CC: aint that some flattery. CC: you sure he aint flirting pitch with you, and trynna accuse you of the same? CC: cause its sounding like it. CC: and alexar. BI: Scabbies... that's a new one. :thinking: BI: You leave social circles for like, two whole minutes and you miss out on all sorts of new things. CC: like the scabies? AC: god, i hope not! AC: or i guess it could be i hope so, if he's attractive, but, like, he stuttertypes. i just don't know if i can hate a man that stuttertypes. AC: and yeah, scabies are a real danger to shady internet hookups, i am told.

The discussion of scabies, shady internet hookups, and whether or not BI/Bijoux is a pale floozy continues, but in PMs:

GC: {sure why not} GC: {wait which aa} AC: uh, the brown one? GC: GC: {which aa} GC: {i think theres two brown ones} AC: AC: wow, brown is an uncreative colour. AC: the one with the really shitty quirk, dude. AC: are you a dude? GC: {theres like a billion trolls that are red or brown or yellow} GC: {also they both have shitty quirks} GC: {and yeah} GC: {im a dude} AC: and you're a jade? seriously? GC: {yeah} GC: {so what its not so weird} GC: {im living with another male jade right now} AC: uh, no, it totally is weird, sorry. GC: {or well not right now right now im somewhere else at this exact moment but you get what i mean} GC: {what} GC: {no its not} AC: are you sure you're not actually teal? AC: or olive, those blend together, too, i guess. GC: {uh yeah no im pretty sure im jade} GC: {like right smack middle jade} AC: huh. GC: {like this is our standard chrome for jade jade} AC: post pics, because that totally sounds like bullshit, and i am betting you are actually teal. AC: which, it's okay to be teal, dude. AC: is it an ugly colour? yes. GC: {only if you post pics first} GC: {im not fucking teal} GC: {im jade} AC: but it's your colour, so you should embrace it. GC: {super jade} AC: of course you are, dude. GC: {jade as jade can be} AC: i am just saying, it's okay to have a little green in your veins. it doesn't mean you're not blue. GC: {im jade} AC: doubledots sigh doubledots GC: { :sigh: } GC: {listen you fucking suck at this}(edited) GC: {thats not a real emoji either} AC: at least i am trying to accept myself for who and what i am, a proud cobalt who cannot use a computer, unlike some of us. AC: that is a cutting reference to the fact you hate your own blood colour, by the way. GC: {what are you illiterate or something} AC: or are ashamed. GC: {i dont hate my blood color} AC: shame is an option, too, i guess. GC: {okay hold up asshole} AC: more sad, but. GC: {hold on} GC: {because fuck you fuck you is why}

--grantonCleaver sent fuckyouiswhy.png, of a picture of his unbandaged hand that got spiked during his fight with Hadean. It's looking a bit gross because you know, WOUNDS but it's clean and also unmistakably jade.--

AC: huh! AC: nice filter. is that a wound the nine sweep old gave you, or are you fighting with other pupa's, too? GC: {oh holy shit} GC: {i just gave you photographic proof} GC: {and youre still calling shit on me} GC: {kua} AC: what can i say, i know enough about computers to call bullshit when i see it. AC: and i just don't think i know you well enough to be on a last name basis, dude, i am going to have to ask you to stick to mighty. GC: {might fucking sucks} GC: {so does kua} GC: {get better names} AC: wow! AC: at least i have names. AC: did you have everyone on your ship call you ronado, too? GC: {yeah absolutely} AC: man. so cabin jade ronado. that's kind of a mouthfeel. AC: can i call you ronnie? GC: {weird but sure} AC: was the work hard? GC: {uh on my flarping ship?} AC: yes, being a cabin boy.(edited) GC: {wasnt a cabin boy thank you very much} GC: {it was good and hard yeah no different than being on any other flarping pirate ship} AC: hahaha AC: suuuure. AC: what did they call it, then? ive only been on real ships, so i don't know the terms. AC: deck swabbed? AC: lookout? GC: GC: {its literally the same terms} GC: {literally the exact same terms}(edited) AC: uh, no, sorry. AC: maybe they tell you that, to make you feel better about playing pretend. GC: {i was first mate asshole} AC: huh. AC: so a glorified cabin boy. GC: {ok now youre being a dick and stupid} AC: you're right, alexar. that was just me being a total bulgemunch, and it is also a sign that i should probably go sit down, take a breather and wash this blood off, because it is unkind of me to take my frustrations out on you, an innocent, complete stranger on the internet. AC: it is wrong, and i am sincerely apologetic for having done so, dude. AC: so, like, light. GC: GC: {uh light}

-- ayeayeCaptain [AC] is no longer messaging grantonCleaver [GC]! --

-- ayeayeCaptain [AC] is now messaging grantonCleaver [GC]! --

AC: also, i totally do know you, you dumb fuck.

-- ayeayeCaptain [AC] is no longer messaging grantonCleaver [GC]! --

#c:alexar #c:kuanfu

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