#bella in breaking dawn be like:

[cats-and-cacti]

#alice in a hotel in arizona was like #twilight #new moon #eclipse #breaking dawn #alice cullen #bella swan #twilight meme #twilight memes #edward cullen #twilight ballet studio

[edwardsdeathcabcd]

in midnight sun when edward sees his siblings playing a convoluted chess game, knowing they won’t let him play, and in new moon when bella watches him & alice play, but the game happened entirely in their heads & only took a few minutes LIKE. no wonder edward was happy to spend their honeymoon playing chess instead of fucking lmao he hasn’t had a good opponent in over 80 years

#& u have to admit it’s. A LITTLE BIT CUTE. #LIKE. she gives him so many small things back yk what i mean. all these tiny normalcies. #bella is the only person edward can play chess like a normal person with & that’s so funny #twilight #bella x edward #bella swan #edward cullen #midnight sun #new moon #breaking dawn #alice cullen #twilight blog #mine

[fuckmeyer]

Edward realistically had to throw up on his wedding day. what else can he do? he's up there on that bridal party table, center of attention, eating his first meal as a married man with his wife, plates are like $100000 per head so it's too suspicious to not eat, PLUS you know those wedding guests are doing some clinkety clink clink action on their glasses to get Edward & Bella to kiss like every 5 mins. never a moment's peace! it's all a constant ruse! & when all was said & done my man was probably up there in an airplane lavatory 30,000 feet in the air on his way to Rio just blowing chunks of chicken cordon bleu & wedding cake thinking it was still the best day of his life. fucking lol

#i bet he got major shit from his siblings too - like damn dude hope cooked spiced dead animal flesh was worth it LOL #hey yknow what? props. he's walkin thru hell and back to marry & bed the girl of his dreams. god gives his toughest battles etc etc #twilight #twilight headcanon #the twilight saga #twilight renaissance #twilight saga #edward cullen #bella swan #breaking dawn

[railmerosalie]

*Edward and Bella about to happily get married*

Jacob: hey Bella, is this dude bothering you ??

#twilight #twilight meme #edward cullen #bella swan #edward and bella #twilight memes #fuck smeyer #twilight shitpost #breaking dawn #twilight saga #jacob black #i like jacob i swear #only in new moon qnd twilight he can choke in the rest

[the-golden-onion]

absolutely cackling at smeyer’s concept of romance: an all night staring contest

i love breaking dawn so much

#who is doing it like them? no one with eyelids that’s for sure #breaking dawn #bella swan #edward cullen #bellward #twilight renaissance #twilight saga #twilight #the golden onion #archive #excerpts #books

[battlescas]

Currently thinking about the time I sent someone a Twilight meme and their response was telling me why we couldn’t be friends anymore

#this was like a month ago #twilight #twilight au #twilight renaissance #twilight edit #twilight bella #bella swan #edward cullen #breaking dawn #bella cullen #kristen stewart

[iveleftitwithyou]

i would pay stephenie meyer the entire contents of my bank account (7 dollars) to write the rest of the twilight books from edward’s perspective ESPECIALLY new moon. i need to know what that weirdo was doing in rio every day

#i don’t like the woman but she can do just this one thing for me #i love midnight sun so much #my little anxiety ridden murderer <3 #twilight #edward cullen #bella swan #the twilight saga #jacob black #midnight sun #new moon #eclipse #breaking dawn #carlisle cullen #robert pattinson #stephenie meyer #alice cullen #rosalie hale #jasper whitlock #emmett cullen #esme cullen

[ohyoudosmellgood]

bella swan really called „vampires a-z“ a promising site but is offended when edward questions her intelligence

#bffr girl 🙄 #like literally how is that a trustworthy site #i mean it worked out but still #twilight #bella swan #edward cullen #twilight saga #twilight meme #new moon #cullens #midnight sun #breaking dawn #eclipse #jacob black

[the-most-pathetic-edge-marquis]

what can Bella Swan actually cook?

armed with LegalTM pdfs, control f, and my theory that Bella doesn't actually like cooking she was just written by a mormon housewife, I have determined every specifically named meal Bella cooks in the Twilight Saga!

In summary:

15 total named meals (7 in Twilight, 3 each in New Moon/Eclipse, and 2 in Breaking Dawn)

13 unique meals (lasagna & fried chicken repeat across books)

Presumably she's also cooking literally every other day (when they aren't ordering pizza, which is apparently the only takeout Charlie ever gets), but it's not relevant to her narrative.

my main conclusion is that she eats way too much cereal, but for the purposes of this i've decided that cereal doesn't count as cooking.

Bella Swan canonically knows how to cook:

Twilight:

Steak and potatoes, plus salad (pg 15)

White people enchiladas (p.36)

Fish (marinated), with “salad and bread left over from the night before” (p.68)

Cold-cut sandwiches (p.70)

Grilled cheese (with tomato) (p.111)

Lasagna (p.118)

Fish, using Harry Clearwater’s fish fry (p.169)

New Moon:

Fried chicken (p.70)

Lasagna (p.82)

Casserole (p.197)

Eclipse:

Spaghetti, (rescued from Charlie)

Grandma Swan’s stroganoff recipe (p.29)

Hamburger (p.43)

Breaking Dawn:

Sunny-side up eggs (p.75)

Damn rancid chicken Fried chicken (p.80)

#my meta #bella swan #so i guess she can cook but uh... #this is. very boring. lmao #at one point she says that renee likes to 'experiment' and sometimes it's inedible... #DO YOU MEAN RENEE MAKES FOOD WITH FLAVOR #BECAUSE I FEEL LIKE THAT JUST MEANS RENEE MAKES FOOD WITH FLAVOR. #sorry not to be a renee apologist in the tags #but also this specific search made me SO MAD at charlie so #eclipse is really the worst book. character assassination for EVERYONE #also oh my god she eats so much cereal #you guys? you guys #are there people out there who eat that much cereal??? #that can't be good for you!!! #she eats cereal every day!!! #except for the first when charlie makes her bacon and eggs and she asks to take over the cooking #bella!!! #i think she must not like eggs #(ignoring how many she eats in breaking dawn shh it's fine) #page numbers are all from my pdfs but hopefully they at least kinda map onto the actual books

[frankenstein-ate-my-left-shoe]

i very honestly and wholeheartedly love the fanon interpretation of emmett and bella as 'the chaos twins' and i will always need more of them™

#it's so funny to me how the fandom gave bella a whole ass personality and said #'ok emmett's your brother now and y'all are going to torture your husband and his wife w your antics. have fun' #i love reading little things about how they interact with each other after (and before tbh) bella becomes a vamp #like - we got emmett & newborn!bella a couple times in breaking dawn but the fanon additions and modern!au/continuations are always funny #anyhow #the chaos twins #emmett cullen #bella swan #bella cullen #emmett & bella #twilight #sorry st friends - i'm back on my twilight bullshit #twilight saga

[eccentricextrovert]

“angry grizzly bears are going to look tame next to what’s waiting for you at home.”

☀ AMBER MIDTHUNDER ☀

as

ISABELLA SWAN

#isabella swan #bella swan #twilight #blood #amber midthunder #fan edit #edit #fan edits #gif edits #look i love bella with my whole ass #and native bella is something that makes everything so much better and i have an essay here #like legit it’s paragraphs of content on why bella should’ve been native and pointing out specific things #it’s on charlie’s side duh #new moon #breaking dawn #vampire #eclipse #edward cullen #this ended up more girbossy than intended #inspired by me making my goncharov edit #bc i did that and went 'the first edit i post in so long and its a jOKE I SPENT AN HOUR ON'

[panlight]

the cottage

It was furnished in eclectic pieces, not one of them matching another, but harmonious just the same. One chair seemed vaguely medieval, while a low ottoman by the fire was more contemporary and the stocked bookshelf against the far window reminded me of movies set in Italy. Somehow each piece fit together with the others like a big three-dimensional puzzle. There were a few paintings on the walls that I recognized–some of my very favorites from the big house. Priceless originals, no doubt, but they seemed to belong here, too, like all the rest. It was a place where anyone could believe magic existed. A place where you just expected Snow White to walk right in with her apple in hand, or a unicorn to stop and nibble at the rosebushes. Edward had always thought that he belonged to the world of horror stories. Of course, I'd known he was dead wrong. It was obvious that he belonged here. In a fairy tale. And now I was in the story with him.

Not cringey in the way that "'Ha ha ha,'" he chuckled" is but this part always makes me groan with just how . . . I don't know, oblivious it is?

EDWARD belongs in a unicorn and rosebushes fairytale? Edward? Who was orphaned by the Spanish Flu and went on a years-long murder adventure killing (bad) people and drinking their blood and then angst-ing miserably about it ever since? He's wrong about being in a horror story? Girl, what.

And Bella herself, who has been a vampire for less than a day at this point I think, has already a) nearly killed two hikers [and probably would have if Edward hadn't been there to distract her] b) attacked Jacob over a nickname and c) seriously injured Seth.

I know in the scheme of things the cottage is like the least of the crimes of Breaking Dawn but I was definitely pulled out of the story here.

Also it still makes zero sense that Esme renovated and furnished a house for them in Forks when they were planning on going to Alaska or New Hampshire before Bella's sudden, very short pregnancy derailed their plans, but whatever.

#also for some reason it really bothers me that the Bella gets her favorite paintings from the big house #like first of all i'm supposed to believe she has favorite paintings? #and secondly these were paintings hanging in someone else's house and they just put them in her new house #idk man by this point in breaking dawn I was just generally so mad about everything that this pushed me over the edge lol

[edwardsdeathcabcd]

remember when bella was playfully like "’something I should know’? what lol, are you not a virgin?" and edward went on to confess that he murdered dozens of men. SO unserious can you imagine how quickly the vibes in that room shifted. I know she felt so fucking awkward for saying that

#like i bet the whole time he was sharing his story with her she was just like WHY DID I HAVE TO MAKE A VIRGIN JOKE. IDIOT. #bella swan #edward cullen #twilight #twilight blog #twilight renaissance #breaking dawn #the twilight saga #tts #bella x edward #breaking dawn part 1 #bella #edward #mine

[teamjacobthot]

so like……..if jacob hadn’t thought that snide comment abt bella drinking human blood to feed renegade and help keep bella from fucking dying, were any of the alleged geniuses in the cullen family even gonna come remotely close to a solution……………..

#cause like #bella was abt to pop 3 business days from then #it’s always ‘jacob you idiot jacob you moronic dog’ but was anybody else gonna do anything? no?? oh ok 😐 #just sitting there in the house w several medical degrees amongst them and unlimited money and empty ass heads #just silly #breaking dawn #cullens

[railmerosalie]

Bella is autistic I will die on this hill

#twilight #twilight meme #edward cullen #bella swan #edward and bella #twilight memes #fuck smeyer #twilight shitpost #breaking dawn #twilight saga #shes just like me fr

[bethsbest]

nothing radiated more love from the twilight series for me than bella saying when charlie was about to walk her down the aisle "just don't let me fall, dad" and he said with the protectiveness only a father can have, "never"

#bethtalks #bethloves #beth likes twilight hehe #<3 #guilty pleasure ig #twilight saga #twilight #breaking dawn #bella swan #charlie swan