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#becka makes a thing
captainevans · 1 year
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CHRIS EVANS People Magazine’s Sexiest Man Alive 2022
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jd07201990 · 3 months
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“Oh, come on Chuck! This’ll be my second time! You can’t keep forcing me to work another 40 years, just to make it to retirement and do it all again! It’s not yours or my fault that there aren’t enough young folk to take over our jobs! Hell, maybe if we paid a bit more, the few of them out there would apply!”
“It’s Lieutenant Roth, Billy. Now go change out of that equipment and take a shower. Whatever this remote does to strip away all those years, it sure does leave a young man ripe!”
“Don’t call me Billy! I haven’t been Billy in 30 years! Its Bill Damn it! And how am I supposed to explain this, again! to David?! You know he’s not into, well… this!”
“Put your shirt down Billy and quit your complaining. We’re doing something different this time, changing things up, trying something new. See, we couldn’t afford to pay higher wages all these years, because we’ve been stashing extra money away, for a new program. This remote can do a lot more than just wipe away years, Billy. The company has a whole app-store full of features, but they cost a hell of a lot. We only had enough for 2 new features, and we think it’ll really help solve this town’s aging population issue.”
“Wha… what the hell are you saying? What do you mean, something new?! Chuck, dude… you’re seriously starting to crack! What the fuck does any of this have to do with David?! And who is, “We”?!”
“I’m only going to tell you this once, son. It’s Lieutenant Roth. Now, I guess there’s no beating around the bush with you young-bloods. So I’ll get right to it. “We” is me, the Governor, and the Town Board. We investigated every possible fix, and it comes down to this. All the youth are moving out in droves, going to college, or fleeing to the city for excitement, leaving us aging folk to do the hard work around town. With the remote able to take years off a person, we’ve decided that all our current retirees, in every department, will be regressed, and the new feature we purchased will ensure you all follow your new, youthful instincts, providing us with a full generational bump in population.
You will be the hot-blooded virile stud you were way back in the day; you remember? Except this time, just as David isn’t attracted to this prime of your life look, YOU won’t be attracted to David, or any man for that matter. You see, we need all the help we can get, so with this little app, you’ll be chasing pretty women, and will certainly end up settling down, once one of them catches. Ah, by the look on your face, you know exactly what I mean.
Good, because you and the rest of the retirees are going to have your hands full, working these jobs getting paid just enough for a double-wide and a truck, leaving a trail of gals before you settle in with one, and have a whole mess of kids. "
“Ch… Lieutenant, sir… Wha… you’re insane dude! Fuckin’ totally cracked! You hear yourself! You can’t do this! I can’t be… I can’t chase… I don’t… don’t like…. Fuck… fuck dude… what the fuck are you doing?! Quit pointin’ that shit at me bro! My.. my head!”
“Don’t worry son, I’ll let you off the hook for all that mouthing off. It’s got to be rough having your brain completely flipped inside out, dumped out and filled with everything you need to be a, productive, member of society. Isn’t that right Billy?”
“Wha.. Oh, hey Lieutenant! So uh, is it ok if I head off to the showers and hit the road? Kind of a slow night huh sir? If it’d be alright, I want to go down to the Strip and hit the bar. The dudes and I figured we’d start the weekend early, ya know? Gotta get get some tail on lock before the storms hit. Thinkin’ I might run into Becka too, you know, from Thornton Stables? God she’d look real pretty, all knocked up good n’ proper!”
“Oh alright son. Go ahead, take the night off. But you’re on call. Got it! One or two beers, maybe a shot, take some cash and buy the lass one of those fruity drinks, and you treat her like a lady, young man. Got it?”
“Got it Dude! I mean Lieutenant! I’ll make a lady outa her yet! Thanks for the money too! Ya know how rough it is on the town’s wages! Although you and the Board seem to be doin’ alright. I hope I can get to where you are, Sir!”
“Don’t worry Billy, you’ve got a good 40 years or so to work your way up! Go have fun tonight!”
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farfetchedshow · 3 months
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Are Bridget and Becka a thing or just friends? In love with the two either way lol
They're a couple as far as I'm concerned! We need to make more comics that include them lmao For those who don't know Becka and Bridget are the leaders of the Drain fan club!
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-🐰
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neurosses · 5 months
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i read all ur pynch fics and i need more!!! do u have any fic recs that are similar to your writing style or any fics at all that u think are good?
anon... (a) thank you for the wonderful compliment and (b) you have inspired me to FINALLY post my pynch fic recc list! xoxo. note that this list includes fic of all ratings on ao3.
ALTERNATE UNIVERSE
The Roots that Clutch by TheCryingClub
don’t it beat a slow dance to death by solitarydreaming
carried my body back to shore by solitarydreaming
Transubstantiation* by audikatia
am i turning in your stomach, am i making you sick by undergroundash (note: this is an experimental, grounded AU in that it takes place in the setting of canon but centers around ambiguously non-canonical events)
together, transformed by Otherworldliness
move your feet from hot pavement (and into the grass) by CoraRochester (note: this is grounded in canon with a change in Adam’s epilogue)
cry wolf, cry mercy by flitwickslittlebrotha
gets late early by charactershoes
ALTERNATIVE FIRST KISS
Every Stupid Little Thing by Diana_Dreams
every dream i've ever had has been of myself by cloverspies
it’s time you found another reason to stay by cloverspies
cool of your hand, back of my neck by me (yippee!)
summer’s a knife by theheartischill
“MISSING SCENE” & CANON COMPLIANT
Wonderterror Weekend by nimmieamee
Son of a Nuclear A-Bomb by nimmieamee (note: this is totally grounded in canon but came out before the Dreamer Trilogy — so incredibly good and actually predicts tons of Lynch lore)
Complete my sin by becka
The hang of being alive again by applecrumbledore
show me where to tie the other end of this chain by oorione
to be shipwrecked together by deathlessaphrodite (note: all of deathlessaphrodite’s fic is incredibly good and I’m featuring my favorites in this list)
for the tulips we are not sorry by deathlessaphrodite
be afraid to know your neighbors and to die by deathlessaphrodite
things fall apart, the centre cannot hold by basicallymonsters
patrimony by whatimages
not so transparent by whatimages
live around it by whatimages
feels better biting down by charactershoes
ille mi par esse deo videtur by sleeptodream
Roses in Between My Thighs by orphan_account
*I haven’t finished reading this yet, but so far I’m really enjoying it.
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thetruthwilloutsworld · 5 months
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If anyone knows a thing or two about sex scenes, it’s Sam Heughan. Over the past decade, the 43-year-old Scottish star of Outlander, the cult-hit historical drama, has filmed hours of notoriously raunchy footage in his role as Jamie Fraser, the dashing 18th-­century Highland rebel, with his wife, Claire – a time-traveller from the 20th century, played by ­Caitríona Balfe.
Yet two years ago, Heughan, as one of the executive producers (with Balfe), introduced an intimacy co-ordinator to choreograph such scenes, which had been criticised by many as excessively violent.
“The industry’s completely changed since Outlander started,” Heughan says, sitting in a Soho bar on a visit to London from his home outside Glasgow. “Not just our show but also shows like Game of Thrones were very graphic, with no room for the imagination, in a way that’s quite jarring now. As young, keen actors, we were just expected to get naked and go at it. Caitríona and I formed a bond and trusted each other, but there were times when we were pushed too far.” He was especially troubled by a scene involving full-frontal nudity in ­season one, when Jamie was tortured and raped by his rival, Black Jack Randall (Tobias Menzies). “That really didn’t sit well.”
Everything changed following the MeToo scandal, leading ­Heughan to employ Vanessa Coffey to choreograph the sex scenes. “So now everyone knows what the boundaries are, like in a football or rugby match. It’s been so helpful and freeing, and it was because I didn’t want younger actors to go through what we’d gone through. Now, the scenes are sexually charged, but not gratuitous.”
Despite his heartthrob status, Heughan – who’s 6ft 2in, with the strapping physique his role necess­i­tates – is modest and thoughtful company. He also had Coffey enlisted to co-ordinate his latest pro­ject, Channel 4’s erotic thriller The Couple Next Door, filmed during the short break between Outlander’s seasons nine and 10, in which he plays Danny, a policeman living in a Leeds suburb in an open marriage with Becka (Jessica De Gouw).
“We didn’t want to make a salacious or seedy show about swingers,” Heughan says. “It’s about the psychology behind it – what is it to be in an open relationship where two characters love each other so much that they can invite people into that relationship? I think it’s possibly the greatest form of romance to allow your partner this, if it’s the itch they need to scratch. My character struggles with it.
The couple’s (initially) strait-laced neighbours are played by Alfred Enoch and Eleanor Tom­linson, who in 2019 finished five seasons as Demelza in Poldark. With Outlander about to start ­filming its final season, she and Heughan compared notes on moving on from a huge, long-running costume drama.
“It’s emotional. For me, the prospect’s hugely bittersweet. It feels like getting out of an institution. Outlander’s like a family, it literally defines who I am.” After all, Heughan has created an empire of Outlander spin-offs, including books, television travelogues and his spirits brand, The Sassenach – named after Jamie’s nickname for the English Claire – not to mention his charity, My Peak Challenge, which has raised nearly £5 million to fund a variety of causes, including ­hunger relief and blood-cancer research. “I’m ready for new challenges, but also nervous about what it’s like in the real world,” he says.
Still, he felt now was the right time to wrap. “Outlander could have finished after the ninth season, but, personally, I felt we hadn’t quite got there. So now we have the problem of pushing the writers to do something that’s hopefully satisfying for the audience, but also exciting.” So Heughan doesn’t yet know how Outlander ends? “No idea, and it’s really tough because Diana [Gabaldon, the author on whose novels the series is based] has written so many books.”
The show has a vast international fanbase; VisitScotland has cited a 67 per cent rise in visits to the show’s locations, such as Culloden and Inverness. “I do feel like I’m an unofficial ambassador for Scotland, and sometimes I don’t think the show is given enough credit for what it’s done for Scottish tourism,” Heughan says. “I think the numbers are even bigger than they say, because reams of Americans are just making their own itineraries. Doune Castle’s numbers are up 800 per cent, it’s been completely renovated as a result.”
The show has also transformed the local film industry. “For 10 years, we’ve been employing ­people at over 200 Scottish locations, we’ve started an intern scheme, we’ve built a studio with five sound stages where there was nothing before. So it’s going to leave a legacy.”
The son of an artist single mother (his father walked out when he was a baby), Heughan spent his early childhood in the Borders, his teens in Edinburgh, before studying at Glasgow’s Royal Scottish Academy of Music and Drama, where his mentor was third-year student James McAvoy.
Having worked in London and Los Angeles, Heughan fell back in love with Scotland when he was cast in Outlander. Initially against independence, filming the first ­season in the run-up to the 2016 ­referendum transformed him into a vocal advocate. “Scottish politics right now is a bit of a mess, which is a shame, but maybe they’ll find a new rallying cry. We’re a great wee country with amazing resources, most of which are controlled by the British. Similar small European countries have great identities.”
Initially, Heughan is hesitant to discuss the issue, aware taking either side will provoke a social-media backlash, but then he decides: “Why can’t actors have opi­n­ions? The problem is you have to come down on one side, there is no room for deb­ate. Everything has be­come so aggressive and then social-media algo­rithms mean you only get to see one side of the argument.”
He had his fingers burnt when last month he signed an open letter from Artists for Palestine UK, alongside the likes of Tilda Swinton and Steve Coogan, which accused the Government of “aiding and abetting” Israeli war crimes, but failed to condemn Hamas’s terrorism. The following day, Heughan rescinded, saying he hadn’t “fully understood” what he was signing.
“I was maybe naively calling for peace, which is what we all want, but, unfortunately, that situation is so complex, I can’t understand it all,” he says now. “As an actor, you have a platform, but if you put your thoughts out there, you upset ­people, but you’re also damned if you don’t say anything.”
Heughan’s taking time to navigate a potential post-Outlander career path. “I’m a workaholic, but I have to be discerning. Whatever I do next, I have to feel really passionate about.” Possible plans include directing and exploring a different side to Scotland than misty heather and bagpipes. “I think that underbelly you see in [Ian Rankin’s] Rebus and Irvine Welsh is very interesting, there are still pockets that are very hard and gritty.”
Back in 2005, he auditioned for James Bond in Casino Royale – the role that eventually went to Daniel Craig. Now, there’s a new vacancy. “I’ll throw my hat in the ring,” he says, grinning. “I’d be a brilliant Bond, I’m good at action and I’d bring a lot of ­emotional intelligence.”
There might even be space for a personal life. Heughan’s mystified by “facts” he reads about his private life online. “There’s so much ­nonsense that’s completely false – apparently, I have a daughter. News to me!” he says, flushing. The truth, he says, is that Outlander leaves no time for relationships.
“It’s insane hours and takes over everything. Caitríona’s carved out a beautiful family for herself that she protects very well, but I’ve seen how hard it is for her to do that. I want a cat, but I’m too scared even for that, how would I look after it? One day, maybe,” Heughan says, dreamily.
Posting again as some people had difficulty opening the previous link.
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bcacstuff · 5 months
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This was a surprise..
https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&opi=89978449&url=https://amp.theguardian.com/tv-and-radio/2023/nov/27/the-couple-next-door-review-a-sexy-fantastic-time-with-hot-swingers&ved=2ahUKEwjdzK-Jm-WCAxXmVfEDHafTCY8QFnoECBkQAQ&usg=AOvVaw0lkF1IUYMZo5kfrSdUBxeu
Review
The Couple Next Door review – a sexy, fantastic time with hot swingers
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It is sexy without being cringemaking, which is vanishingly rare … The Couple Next Door. Photograph: Channel 4
The plot of this trouble-in-suburbia thriller might be flimsy – but who cares when there’s so much sexual tension between our flirtatious foursome?
There are two extraordinary features to note about Channel 4’s new six-part drama series The Couple Next Door, which examines the combustible effects of a hot, swinging couple on a pair of conservative young things who move in next door. The first is that it succeeds in being sexy rather than cringemaking. This is vanishingly rare and comes courtesy of a clever, layered script that ties each of the narrative strands together perfectly and takes enough time to build every relationship within the foursome to allow what unfolds to feel plausible. Writer David Allison understands that even people destined to climb into bed with each other are capable of thinking and talking about other things while lust brews in the background, and cracking a few jokes along the way. I don’t know if this was present in the Dutch series New Neighbours, on which this is based, and Allison had the sense to keep it intact or if it’s all his own work but it is fantastically well done. There should be a special annual award for any creation that manages to deliver convincing spousal banter like Allison does here.
The second extraordinary point is the casting of Hugh Dennis as a stalker. Alan (Dennis) is obsessed with Becka, the more free-spirited of the hot swingers (played by Jessica de Gouw, coupling her innate credibility as a hot swinger with a nuanced portrait of a woman making the best of a life she never expected and which will soon take a turn for the worse). And it turns out that Dennis, after decades of providing gentle humour in roles playing on his unthreatening affability in the likes of Outnumbered and Not Going Out, is the perfect creep. Alan starts off as what you might call a bit of a saddo, but as his circumstances change and appetites grow, we watch with bated breath as his behaviour escalates and his mood darkens. It would be a brilliant performance even if its purveyor were not so unexpected, but the casting adds an extra touch of uncanniness to the whole.
The plot of The Couple Next Door is relatively slight. What if, it asks, you suddenly found yourself presented with a world of possibilities you never thought you would entertain? Strictly raised Christian schoolteacher Evie (Eleanor Tomlinson, modulating perfectly from innocence to wonder and, after a series of catalytic events, to rapacity) and husband Pete (Alfred Enoch, great as a man scrambling desperately after his wife as she runs towards possibilities whose ramifications she cannot appreciate) are the polar opposites of their new neighbours Becka and Danny (Sam Heughan, concentrating too hard on disguising his Scottish accent to match the fine-tuned performances of the rest). The latter are non-monogamous – there are a few clunky scenes in which they laboriously explain to us and their new friends how it all works – and both Pete and Evie’s eyes widen at the news, but not for quite the same reasons.
There are a couple of subplots, the main one hinging on Danny’s involvement with a corrupt local councillor who may be the key to a huge story Pete, a journalist, is working on for the local paper. But The Couple Next Door is all about the couples. What happens when feelings start getting in the way of fun? Unequal feelings, unreciprocated feelings, feelings stronger than love, love stronger than any other feeling? What is the difference between morality and successfully repressed natural desires? And what happens when they can’t be repressed any more?
As the sexual and other tensions – Alan, I’m looking at you and your growing malevolence and your poor wife (Kate Robbins) about to find your perverted little eyrie upstairs – grow, it also finds time for a sideways glance at modern masculinity (skinny Pete rolls his eyes as Evie teases him about Danny’s musclebound physique, but his apparent potency plays on their different vulnerabilities), the harm done by the prurience and judgment of others and whether – especially in the age of the internet – you can ever escape it.
But, you know, fun and sexy too. Enjoy.
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sgiandubh · 5 months
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OK, I got it : Telegraph shitshow, anyone?
Oh, what the hell. I had no patience and couldn't picture myself fidgeting in a dull supermarket and ending up by forgetting half of the things on my list.
So, here it is, all of it.
Proof of buying:
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Yeah, "between Outlander's seasons nine and 10'. See how accurate the girl who wrote it is? How about a cobbled something to address the real issues at stake, of which there are three (more on this, in my next post)?
LOL? LOL.
Anyway, there goes. Passages in bold are marked by me:
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If anyone knows a thing or two about sex scenes, it’s Sam Heughan. Over the past decade, the 43-year-old Scottish star of Outlander, the cult-hit historical drama, has filmed hours of notoriously raunchy footage in his role as Jamie Fraser, the dashing 18th-­century Highland rebel, with his wife, Claire – a time-traveller from the 20th century, played by ­Caitríona Balfe.
Yet two years ago, Heughan, as one of the executive producers (with Balfe), introduced an intimacy co-ordinator to choreograph such scenes, which had been criticised by many as excessively violent.
“The industry’s completely changed since Outlander started,” Heughan says, sitting in a Soho bar on a visit to London from his home outside Glasgow. “Not just our show but also shows like Game of Thrones were very graphic, with no room for the imagination, in a way that’s quite jarring now. As young, keen actors, we were just expected to get naked and go at it. Caitríona and I formed a bond and trusted each other, but there were times when we were pushed too far.” He was especially troubled by a scene involving full-frontal nudity in ­season one, when Jamie was tortured and raped by his rival, Black Jack Randall (Tobias Menzies). “That really didn’t sit well.”
Everything changed following the MeToo scandal, leading ­Heughan to employ Vanessa Coffey to choreograph the sex scenes. “So now everyone knows what the boundaries are, like in a football or rugby match. It’s been so helpful and freeing, and it was because I didn’t want younger actors to go through what we’d gone through. Now, the scenes are sexually charged, but not gratuitous.”
Despite his heartthrob status, Heughan – who’s 6ft 2in, with the strapping physique his role necess­i­tates – is modest and thoughtful company. He also had Coffey enlisted to co-ordinate his latest pro­ject, Channel 4’s erotic thriller The Couple Next Door, filmed during the short break between Outlander’s seasons nine and 10, in which he plays Danny, a policeman living in a Leeds suburb in an open marriage with Becka (Jessica De Gouw).
“We didn’t want to make a salacious or seedy show about swingers,” Heughan says. “It’s about the psychology behind it – what is it to be in an open relationship where two characters love each other so much that they can invite people into that relationship? I think it’s possibly the greatest form of romance to allow your partner this, if it’s the itch they need to scratch. My character struggles with it.”
The couple’s (initially) strait-laced neighbours are played by Alfred Enoch and Eleanor Tom­linson, who in 2019 finished five seasons as Demelza in Poldark. With Outlander about to start ­filming its final season, she and Heughan compared notes on moving on from a huge, long-running costume drama.
“It’s emotional. For me, the prospect’s hugely bittersweet. It feels like getting out of an institution. Outlander’s like a family, it literally defines who I am.” After all, Heughan has created an empire of Outlander spin-offs, including books, television travelogues and his spirits brand, The Sassenach – named after Jamie’s nickname for the English Claire – not to mention his charity, My Peak Challenge, which has raised nearly £5 million to fund a variety of causes, including ­hunger relief and blood-cancer research. “I’m ready for new challenges, but also nervous about what it’s like in the real world,” he says.
Still, he felt now was the right time to wrap. “Outlander could have finished after the ninth season, but, personally, I felt we hadn’t quite got there. So now we have the problem of pushing the writers to do something that’s hopefully satisfying for the audience, but also exciting.” So Heughan doesn’t yet know how Outlander ends? “No idea, and it’s really tough because Diana [Gabaldon, the author on whose novels the series is based] has written so many books.”
The show has a vast international fanbase; VisitScotland has cited a 67 per cent rise in visits to the show’s locations, such as Culloden and Inverness. “I do feel like I’m an unofficial ambassador for Scotland, and sometimes I don’t think the show is given enough credit for what it’s done for Scottish tourism,” Heughan says. “I think the numbers are even bigger than they say, because reams of Americans are just making their own itineraries. Doune Castle’s numbers are up 800 per cent, it’s been completely renovated as a result.”
The show has also transformed the local film industry. “For 10 years, we’ve been employing ­people at over 200 Scottish locations, we’ve started an intern scheme, we’ve built a studio with five sound stages where there was nothing before. So it’s going to leave a legacy.”
The son of an artist single mother (his father walked out when he was a baby), Heughan spent his early childhood in the Borders, his teens in Edinburgh, before studying at Glasgow’s Royal Scottish Academy of Music and Drama, where his mentor was third-year student James McAvoy.
Having worked in London and Los Angeles, Heughan fell back in love with Scotland when he was cast in Outlander. Initially against independence, filming the first ­season in the run-up to the 2016 ­referendum transformed him into a vocal advocate. “Scottish politics right now is a bit of a mess, which is a shame, but maybe they’ll find a new rallying cry. We’re a great wee country with amazing resources, most of which are controlled by the British. Similar small European countries have great identities.”
Initially, Heughan is hesitant to discuss the issue, aware taking either side will provoke a social-media backlash, but then he decides: “Why can’t actors have opi­n­ions? The problem is you have to come down on one side, there is no room for deb­ate. Everything has be­come so aggressive and then social-media algo­rithms mean you only get to see one side of the argument.”
He had his fingers burnt when last month he signed an open letter from Artists for Palestine UK, alongside the likes of Tilda Swinton and Steve Coogan, which accused the Government of “aiding and abetting” Israeli war crimes, but failed to condemn Hamas’s terrorism. The following day, Heughan rescinded, saying he hadn’t “fully understood” what he was signing.
“I was maybe naively calling for peace, which is what we all want, but, unfortunately, that situation is so complex, I can’t understand it all,” he says now. “As an actor, you have a platform, but if you put your thoughts out there, you upset ­people, but you’re also damned if you don’t say anything.”
Heughan’s taking time to navigate a potential post-Outlander career path. “I’m a workaholic, but I have to be discerning. Whatever I do next, I have to feel really passionate about.” Possible plans include directing and exploring a different side to Scotland than misty heather and bagpipes. “I think that underbelly you see in [Ian Rankin’s] Rebus and Irvine Welsh is very interesting, there are still pockets that are very hard and gritty.”
Back in 2005, he auditioned for James Bond in Casino Royale – the role that eventually went to Daniel Craig. Now, there’s a new vacancy. “I’ll throw my hat in the ring,” he says, grinning. “I’d be a brilliant Bond, I’m good at action and I’d bring a lot of ­emotional intelligence.”
There might even be space for a personal life. Heughan’s mystified by “facts” he reads about his private life online. “There’s so much ­nonsense that’s completely false – apparently, I have a daughter. News to me!” he says, flushing. The truth, he says, is that Outlander leaves no time for relationships.
“It’s insane hours and takes over everything. Caitríona’s carved out a beautiful family for herself that she protects very well, but I’ve seen how hard it is for her to do that. I want a cat, but I’m too scared even for that, how would I look after it? One day, maybe,” Heughan says, dreamily.
The Couple Next Door begins on Channel 4 on Monday 27 November at 9pm; stream all episodes from this date
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joannanora · 8 months
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In need of a TV series to fill those chilly autumn evenings? The Couple Next Door is here to heat things up.
Drama! Suspense! Sex! The Couple Next Door sounds right up our street. Add in some of our favourite actors in leading roles, and we’re firmly on board.
We don’t know yet exactly when this TV series will land on our screens (other than sometime in autumn), but what we do have is enough details to convince you to add The Couple Next Door to your ‘ooh, I’ll definitely tune into that’ list for future reference. Oh, and some exclusive first-look images.
Let’s talk you through everything you need to know to get thoroughly excited about this show.
What is The Couple Next Door about?
The Couple Next Door is a dark psychological drama that’s all about desire.
When Evie and Pete move into a fancy new neighbourhood, they’re surrounded by gossip, anxiety and curtain twitching. But thankfully they find some pals to help them navigate their environment: the couple next door (like the title of the show, get it?), traffic cop Danny and his wife, Becka, a glamorous yoga instructor.
The two couples get closer together, then… something happens. As the show’s description says: “One fateful night, [they] become sexually entangled in a way that will change their lives forever.”
Who stars in The Couple Next Door?
We’ve got some great names playing the pair of couples. Eleanor Tomlinson (Poldark, The Outlaws) plays Evie, and Alfred Enoch (Tigers, How To Get Away With Murder) is her husband, Pete. The couple next door are played by Sam Heughan (Outlander, Suspect) and Jessica De Gouw (Pennyworth, Our Man From Jersey).
What are people saying about The Couple Next Door?
The show is described as “a deliciously dark, psychological drama, exploring the claustrophobia of suburbia and the fallout of chasing your deepest desires”. Sounds fun to us.
And Caroline Hollick, head of drama at Channel 4 declared the series “an addictive, emotional roller-coaster with something to say about modern sexual mores, with an electrifying cast that will set our screens on fire”.
Of playing lead role Evie, Eleanor Tomlinson said: “Evie is an exciting challenge for me – a girl whose world is turned upside down as she navigates devastating trauma, which isn’t helped by unresolved issues from her past. We have an excellent team on board, and I am looking forward to exploring this dark and complicated world alongside Sam and our director Dries.”
“At the heart of this series are two couples who get increasingly close to each other, and one fateful night become sexually entangled in a way that will change the rest of their lives forever,” added Jo McGrath, executive producer. “You never really know what goes on behind closed doors but this series sets out to make you wonder.”
Juicy, right?
How can we watch The Couple Next Door?
No word yet on an exact release date, but we do know The Couple Next Door will be out at some point this autumn. The series will premiere on Channel 4 in the UK and will be available on Starz in the US and Canada, as well as Lionsgate+ in Latin America, including Brazil.
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hellhoundmaggie · 7 months
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Any predictions for the next SH episode? I just finished chapter 4 and wellll... considering Wayne might be living in the Forbidden Wing, I think he might try to lock us in there to keep us out of trouble?
It would be neat if, based on who you've been hanging out with, your friends try to rescue you, OR a supernatural event happens and you miss it if you don't get out fast enough!
Based on comments Wayne makes if you talk to him at the end of Ep 4, he is past trying to stop us from investigating. He knows we are supernaturally drawn to The Plot and can’t be stopped, so he’s resolved himself to being our bodyguard. He even suggested we investigate the Estate and learn about the Scarlets ourselves at the end of the episode.
Therefore I think Ep 5’s main daytime activity will involve us doing just that. Tabby will be dealing with the strike — and probably with the unearthing of Becka and Alexis in worldstates where they were left in the mines — so will not be available to help us, but many of our other friends will. Wayne will be the default investigative companion, but we’ll have the option to call on one other member of the gang to help us instead. It’s an exploration date!
We will also deal with the fallout of the Reese situation: visiting him in the forest in worldstates where he is alive and free, or visiting Doc and/or a locked-up Reese in the clinic. We might also have an amputee Rosalina develop an infection that requires a doctor’s care — a major downside of worldstates where the town’s only physician is dead! We might also get some expository dialogue from Oscar, who has been researching the Seals. Good job research buddy!
Then there comes the evening event, which I believe will take place at the church and involve Tulip’s “rat” “friends,” along with Kaneeka awakening to her burgeoning magical power. The major choice will be letting Sybil drain her daughter for some kind of greater good — this would also de-age Sybil into a hottie, facilitating her romance — freeing Kaneeka from her mother’s control and allowing future badness to happen, or using Mystical to maintain the magic without sacrificing Kaneeka.
I’m sure of one thing: there are plenty of surprises left in store for us!
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allwaswell16 · 1 year
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All the One Direction fics I read and enjoyed in April 2023. You can listen to my podcast to hear me talk about each of these fics as well as an overview of what was posted on ao3 including the fics on this month’s fic roundup which you can find here! Please let the writers know if you liked the fics by leaving kudos and comments! Happy reading!
Fanfictional Podcast #49 |  ko-fi | fic recs
—Louis/Harry—
🪷 Higher, Further, Faster by hazzahtomlinson / @itsnotreal
(NR, 31k, uni au) Or the one where Harry decides to go to college regardless of what his team warns him about and has to face the consequences, some of which aren’t so terrible after all. 
🪷 I'm Weaker Without You by The_Halcyonic_Lachesist / @chai-hat-tea
(T, 20k, Regency au) Alpha Lord Louis Tomlinson is a rake who refuses to settle down. Will he settle down for the Society's most talked about Omega? 
🪷 they say looks can kill (and i might try) by LiveLaughLoveLarry / @loveislarryislove
(M, 18k, superhero au) Now he walks those same streets as Rogue, a vigilante who makes his own justice - and he's making damn sure that justice is coming for CowellCorp too.
🪷 Wanna play you like a game, boy (what's the thrill of the same toy?) by thebreadvan / @thebreadvansstuff
(E, 10k, dom/sub) Louis is Harry's boss, and Harry has a humiliation kink.
🪷 Unraveling by D1ona30
(E, 10k, roommates) He thought over the past few weeks, how he’d just known at certain times what Louis had been thinking or feeling, needing or wanting and it didn’t make sense to him. Until he had the wild thought, “Can I read Louis's mind?”
🪷 to be a better man by devilinmybrain / @thedevilinmybrain
(E, 9k, cheating au) “But if you’re so concerned, go see what he wants. Make him happy enough to leave me alone, eh? Since you’re so worried.”
🪷 Maid in the A.M. by @lainy122
(E, 9k, famous/not famous) “You’re not supposed to be here.” The lad frowned at him.“Sorry,” Harry said automatically. Which, wait. No, that wasn’t right. “Um, actually, I sort of live here?”
🪷 Read you like a book by becka / @realmenwearpuppypants
(E, 8k, canon) Louis realises Harry can read his mind. He'll do anything to make Harry admit it. 
🪷 Warm Chilling by Larry_you_know / @larryyouknow
(G, 7k, countryside) Louis moves into a cosy cottage in the English countryside with his dog Clifford to look after his great-aunt's animals.
🪷 Somethin' Old and Red by nonsensedarling / @absoloutenonsense
(NR, 5k, vampire au) There was a ritual with these things. He’d pour a splash into a wine glass —his favourite little joke was telling humans he loved a nice glass of red every now and again— then sat down in his living room and listened to music while he drank.
🪷 out of time by missinglockets
(G, 5k, canon) Louis finishes his cigarette, contemplating what to say to Harry. They don’t do this anymore. He doesn’t know what he’s getting himself into.
🪷 Things Unsaid by LadyLondonderry / @londonfoginacup
(G, 4k, soulmate au) where you have a tattoo of the first thought your soulmate has when they see you
🪷 Harry Styles Plays with Kittens While Answering Questions by @sadaveniren
(T, 4k, hybrids au) Louis runs a Youtube channel and Harry is his celebrity guest
🪷 Unplant by @hellolovers13
(M, 4k, neighbors) Louis should've looked where he was going, then he wouldn't have to desperately try to save a little flower now.
🪷 lucky once, could be lucky again by @jaerie
(E, 2k, a/b/o) Louis has been letting the rich and famous knot him for cash since he found himself walking out on the lavish lifestyle of his rockstar future mate.
🪷 Baby you're a little mind reader by larrycaring / @mystupidamours
(G, 2k, uni au) Person A is thinking inappropriate thoughts, suddenly panics and thinks: “If you’re a mind reader, cough right now.” Person B: *coughs*
🪷 ready for a war by @nouies
(E, 1k, pwp) Harry was so close to getting caught, and it was all on that stupidly pretty cocktail waiter.
—Rare Pairs—
🪷 for your eyes only by @muldxr
(M, 9k, Harry/James Bond) While on a dangerous mission, 007 reunites with an old flame.
🪷 Come get your man by Lhhome / @lhhomefics
(T, 3k, Niall/Harry/Lewis Capaldi/Shawn Mendes) “Oh that well its a funny story, I was drunk and it was like four in the morning or something and i sent him something that i don't even remember but it was one of those messages that disappear so I couldn’t even find out what I sent him and he refuses to tell me so honestly I am excusing myself from the narrative, it's all on him” Lewis explains.
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captainevans · 1 year
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KNIVES OUT (2019) GLASS ONION: A KNIVES OUT MYSTERY (2022) dir. Rian Johnson
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causeimanartist · 1 year
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I posted 187 times in 2022
149 posts created (80%)
38 posts reblogged (20%)
Blogs I reblogged the most:
@causeimanartist
@frownyalfred
@peetamellarkthebaker
@becka-blue
@allgremlinart
I tagged 186 of my posts in 2022
Only 1% of my posts had no tags
#my art - 112 posts
#causeimanartist - 111 posts
#batman - 55 posts
#dc - 50 posts
#bruce wayne - 46 posts
#ask - 33 posts
#reblog - 30 posts
#the owl house - 24 posts
#not art - 23 posts
#wonder woman - 16 posts
Longest Tag: 126 characters
#(that’s right i saw your tags and i just want you to know i adore this drawing. it’s lovely and you have such a cute style op)
My Top Posts in 2022:
#5
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He doesn’t want to hear it
2,668 notes - Posted October 17, 2022
#4
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Alfred: Master Bruce this is weird, even by your standards
3,706 notes - Posted March 6, 2022
#3
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“I’m starting to think you make those things just to destroy them!”
4,256 notes - Posted April 24, 2022
#2
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Clark: I think you’re low balling it, tbh.
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6,764 notes - Posted February 27, 2022
My #1 post of 2022
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The formation of the Trinity - Battison edition! Aka, two extroverts adopt an introvert ✌🏻
7,376 notes - Posted April 4, 2022
Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →
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blacktabbygames · 1 year
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For Scarlet Hollow have you made any changes to the story based on the response of your fanbase towards one character or another? Have you been surprised by any strong responses to certain characters?
We have a hard rule about not making any major changes to the story in response to the community.
The main way we interact with fan theories or community discussions of characters is to see how far interpretations drift from our initial intent, and then we'll course correct to make things more openly in-line with that intent.
We also strive to have competitive splits on important decisions in the game, and will sometimes make edits to the script if we feel a decision is too lopsided one way or another.
Spoiler examples under the cut.
When Episode 1 released, a lot of people were confused by Stella's actions and reactions towards the end of the episode, generally not realizing that she's written to be an aloof person who intensely and immediately buries her trauma. We wanted her behavior to raise questions, but there are challenges, especially with interactive media, with writing something so that people question the character rather than the portrayal. Her content in that episode's gone through quite a few revisions, with the most recent being an addition we made in January of this year that depicts the ride back to town.
In the end of Episode 3, we had Sybil shut down speculative conversation following the ghost hunt, mostly because we find that sort of exposition-heavy conversation boring both to write and play. This led to parts of the fandom having a serious bone to pick with her, and it definitely influenced parts of our approach to Episode 4, even if it didn't change the general structure of that content.
In terms of major decisions, the two most imbalanced decisions were in Episode 1 (Duke vs Gretchen, ESPECIALLY after we added Talk to Animals) and Episode 2 (Leave the mines vs go after Becka and Alexis) We did a few iterations of edits to try and balance that out, including more graphically depicting Rosalina's injury.
One of the lessons we learned from Episode 3's survey was that whatever the player is last told by an authority figure heavily influences the decision they make. So in the library, there's about 45-55 split between leaving the ghost in the library and somebody making a sacrifice (excluding Book Smart). But if you cut that data based on whether you spent the haunting with Wayne (who tells you leave the ghost) and Tabitha (Sybil tells her to make the sacrifice), it switches into a 70-30 split in both cases, favoring either what Wayne or Sybil tells the player to do.
We eventually applied that information to the Episodes 1 + 2 decisions. Originally in Episode 1, narration about Gretchen struggling against her harness was the last information you received before making the choice, and in Episode 2, it was Rosalina pleading with you to rescue her friends.
We changed those such that in Episode 1, it's now Duke begging you to get the flashlight because the creature is "getting closer" and in Episode 2, it's now in this order depending on what's available: 1. Tabitha stressing that this isn't a movie, and if you don't leave, you're going to get yourselves killed.
2. One of your traits emphasizing the danger of the coming collapse.
3. Narration emphasizing the danger of the coming collapse.
While they're still lopsided decisions, in the case of Episode 1, this small change shifted things from 20% of players saving duke and 80% saving gretchen to 30% of players saving duke and 70% saving gretchen (excluding powerful build)
In Episode 2 this shifted things from 15% leaving with Rosalina to 20% leaving with Rosalina.
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ssaalexblake · 5 months
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the witchfinders is complex for me bc the doctor Needed and Deserved that wakeup call and i felt 0% sorry for her but also did it have to be from a damn King with the royalty thing??? but at least it wasn't That far up the arse of royalty like this show has an unfortunate habit of being. but also ugh. and while the doctor deserved it and i genuinely think it Needed to happen i don't have to enjoy the thing being portrayed on screen Either
but also for a split second in the ep when 13's really pissed off at Becka she looks like she's about to jump on her and make out with her which is, you know, fun.
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bcacstuff · 5 months
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The Couple Next Door (my take on it)
I've posted a lot of articles and a number of reviews and seen most of the comments on it. I also need to mention the way fans (mainly of SH) are posting about it on social media. Things that annoy me a little, is the drooling over his body, the focus on the intimate scenes, or how articles make it sound like it is all about hot, swingers, exciting sex scenes, where mostly Eleanor T and Sam are named as the leading actors that are responsible for the named scenes. I disagree with that description, it doesn't do justice to the show or cover it at all.
🚨 Note: It wasn't possible to write this review without spoilers. So you'll find spoilers below.
Though the 'swinger' part, is one of the important parts of the story, leading to the finale, there are a number of side stories as well that are as much important for the storylines. In fact the only real intimate scene is in episode 3, after the 2 couples learned about each other spending some time together, an evening at Becka (Jessica de Gouw) and Danny's (Sam Heughan) house and a day at the beach. All to build up the sexual tension, that most of the part is evident by Evie (Eleanor T) who gets curious and fantasizes about the lifestyle of Becka and Danny and talks about couple swapping with Pete, while Pete (Alfred Enoch) isn't into it at all. Evie lies to Becka saying she and Pete talked about it and are both into it, and despite Danny's initial rejection to the idea when Becka suggests it (because they have the rule not to do it with friends) they end up at a luxurious venue with a spa. In the evening they swap partners, Becka starting to kiss Pete and Danny is taking Evie into a bedroom where they get intimate while Pete tells Becka he doesn't want it.
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In fact there is much more leading to the finale in the woods, which we already see at the beginning but the way all the characters get there is told in the story after this prologue.
Becka doesn't really has something to hide, she's quite open about her non monogamous and free life style. The way she behaves with Danny, constantly embracing and kissing shows what person she is.
Danny only takes on this lifestyle because he adores Becka, who grew up with it. He also hides a son he has with someone else and which leads to financial problems. The reason he gets into a shady side business with his colleague cop Gary. One that gets him entangled in a life threatening situation
Evie is brought up in a very opposite and strict religious way, she resents her dad judging about the way she got pregnant and consequently accuses him of praying for her to lose her baby.
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Pete might be struggling a bit with his (manly) ego. He works as a journalist for a local newspaper and tries to get a scoop together with his colleague incriminating a well known authority, but they lack the actual evidence for it.
One of the side stories is the creepy neighbour Alan (Hugh Dennis) who is spying on Becka and is disgruntled because she tells him he can't be in her yoga class. He steals home videos of Becka and Danny and puts them on a website. Something that puts Becka and Danny in an troublesome situation and leads to Becka losing her clients and finding out about Danny's hidden son.
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Those side stories is what we see glimpses of in the first 3 episodes and what evolves and gets played out in the last 3 episodes. I wasn't that much impressed by the first 3 episodes, but got more interested in the last 3 episodes where all the story lines come together and leading to the finale. Making me binge the rest all at once.
I did see oddities or parts where I thought, perhaps a bit overdone. Like the weed smoking, drinking parts to point out a 'free lifestyle', and the way Becka can't keep her hands of Danny.
Calling the intimate part with Evie and Danny hot and steamy is overrated. I could have done without the line 'Take a good look' by Danny to Evie while he strips off his clothes, as if she's a little religious woman who has only ever done it with the lights off under the blankets. (which is totally not the case, as we've seen earlier on how Evie and Pete have sex on the kitchen counter after the BBQ with Becka and Danny. Evie obviously aroused by their neighbours lifestyle, and Pete pleasantly surprised by it though not much skin is shown) Consequently Danny walks of from the camera to get the bottle of wine, just to show his naked butt, a scene that wasn't needed imo. Especially since the bottle of wine didn't had any other purpose (I could have thought of some creative ways using it to make the scene more 'steamy'). But after all, it was just to make sure we know he and Evie got into the actual deed, which was quite unimaginatively, straight up and down in one position, only with a small interruption to make sure we know the condom split. Not the wild intimate scene you'd imagine after all the build up to the couple swap. And dare I say the rather rude thrusting and pushing looked more hurtful than enjoyable. But it explains how Evie got pregnant (again) and it's not Pete's child. A significant part of the story that leads to the finale in the woods.
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There's also a scene where Evie shows up at Danny's work, in the evening while he seems to be alone. She seduces him again to get intimate with her, he doesn't want it and already made clear to her that she needs to stop thinking they have something with each other. The flesh is weak though, and they end up having sex on the desk without taking their clothes off... I don't know how needed this scene was actually and it wasn't that credible to be honest. (and not hot nor steamy at all). Perhaps it was to contribute to the obsession of Evie about her and Danny and she tells him she's pregnant with his child, which Danny doesn't like at all. However Danny doesn't tell Becka about this event and about Evie being pregnant with his child. It's not completely clear why he doesn't do that, partly because he's caught up in the troubles his side job caused and perhaps partly because he's afraid Becka would resent him for it.
Another oddity I found is while Alan breaks into the house of Becka and Danny stealing their home videos. He takes pictures with his phone from the camera, but when he uploads them to a website we actually see quite clear videos. I was wondering why he didn't just take the memory card from the camera, to put the footage on his own computer and sneaks back into their house to put the memory card back into the camera. That would be more credible, but okay. After all he does go back into the house when Becka and Danny are away for their spa weekend with Evie and Pete. His wife Jean (Kate Robbins), who he neglected all the time and didn't help to get her stairlift she wants so badly so she can go upstairs again to be with him, meanwhile got the stairlift installed and found out about her husband secretly spying. Curiously she just happens to look through the telescope Alan has installed in the room upstairs, and sees how her husband gets a stroke in the house of Becka and Danny.
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And then there's this part where Danny and Becka rush to the woods after Evie calls Danny saying she's in danger. While they jump into the car and drive off they don't notice how they're followed by a hitman, who wants to kill Danny as he betrayed his criminal boss. On their way Becka and Danny get into a huge argument, as Becka doesn't trust him anymore after she found out about his hidden son. And since it turns out Evie is pregnant from him, which Becka only learns now, it all made it even worse. They stop halfway, as Becka wants to get out of the car. And they are arguing in an open field. It is actually a good scene, both are playing their part very well, and gotta say, here Sam's emotion is quite credible in this scene. The oddity here however is that the hitman who followed them and who could have an easy shot at Danny in that open field, patiently waited until they're done arguing and resume their way to the cottage in the woods. It's only there he tries to take a shot at Danny, but misses.
About the acting of all characters I have to say for me, the characters played by Jessica de Gouw and Alfred Enoch were the more credible ones. That said, each character has interaction and scenes with each other. And they're all quite different. Danny and Becka, Danny and Evie, Danny and Pete are all quite different. That goes for all the characters actually.
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About Sam, I did see a number of what we call here the five acting things, especially in the first 3 episodes, but I also saw better ones in the other parts. As said the scenes with Becka arguing, confessing his secrets and love for her looked quite credible. But yes, there's also the head nodding, and a lot of 'hmmm's' to throw me out of scenes. To say he can only act taking his shirt off is unfair. That's not what I saw, and I feel that's more because of the way the show has been sold and gives me the feeling the ones saying so didn't actually watch the show. Adding to that 'fans' who just drool over his body on sm which I find embarrassing and not doing him a favor if they want him to be seen as a serious actor. His character is supposed to be the alpha male, but actually has it weaknesses as well as it turns out. I think the character more or less lives up to that role. While the alpha male parts are not all that convincing the weaknesses are more convincing.
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About Eleanor, gotta say I wasn't that much convinced by the way she plays her character. Maybe she had the best scenes with Jessica, talking and being curious about Becka's lifestyle and the way they both were raised. We see her at her parents dinner table making a scene that leaves everyone shattered. She can put a sort of smile on her face which makes you feel like she's actually not the honest woman she puts out there but has her hidden secrets. Even the end and the last look at her shows that smile but behind her eyes you see the dishonesty perhaps...
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About Jessica, I quite liked the way she acted her parts, with all of the characters. The more 'free' woman with an open mind to everyone, fair and open in her emotions. Her character loves her husband more than he realizes, but it's all based on trusting each other, and that trust gets betrayed in a way when she finds out about his hidden child. The scenes arguing with Danny about that, the things he didn't tell her and confessing how much she loves him are good on both parts. The constant hugging and kissing parts are a bit overdone though.
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About Alfred, I think his character was the most credible one and very well played by him. He's the husband of Evie, they've been married 17 years and the butterflies are long gone. When Evie gets more interested about the lifestyle of their neighbours, he goes along and gets himself into smoking weed and drinking more than he likes or ever wanted. Which of course loosens him up somewhat but he doesn't feel comfortable about it. He struggles a bit with his ego, his inability to beget the so wanted baby, as well as the way Evie seems more and more obsessed by the alpha male (looking) neighbour. His ego gets a boost though when he manages to blackmail Danny in providing him the evidence he and his colleague journalist lack to expose the criminal actions by a well known figure in the society. Which actually leads to Danny getting in a life threatening situation.
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About the story and the way it is shown. The story is based on the book 'Nieuwe Buren' (I saw it was translated in some articles as 'The swingers' but that's not the correct translation, 'New Neighbours' is the actual translation). Though the story lines for the bigger part are the same, there are a number of alterations. The most significant alteration is perhaps the part about how Evie gets pregnant. In the book this is actually secretly plotted by Evie and Becka, while in the show Becka doesn't know about it.
The end of the story is altered as well, as in the book none of the characters survives. The actual ending of the book is much more horrible.
The shown doesn't go into depth for most of the story lines, it sort of touches the surfaces and doesn't get very complicated. In fact it's quite predictable at points, though I think there could easily be 2 more episodes when storylines were played out a bit more.
To me there were some loose ends, like the hidden son, who does get to know his half brother because of Becka making it possible, where Danny fails because of his fear to confess this secret to her (and perhaps fear of losing Becka). It feels a little flimsy to leave it at what was shown.
Another loose end is what actually happened to Danny and his colleague as corrupt cops helping a criminal. Gary gets beaten up at some point, when he and Danny rob diamonds from a bank. Danny gets away, Gary finally gets questioned at the bureau. But before anyone can find Danny he's away with Becka to the woods to help Evie. We never get to know the end of that storyline.
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I've seen a number of criticisms going on about the accents used. I'm not getting into that, as a non native English, I can hear there's an accent used but in no way I feel I can say anything educated about that. I also saw comments about the location, where Leeds has been named it doesn't seem credible to people. Details that maybe could have been avoided by not naming an actual location, and just call it Suburbia. It doesn't make the story or the show less or more credible imho.
All in all a nice and enjoyable watch, don't pay too much attention to details and don't expect a complicated story. The dots are connected in an obvious and easy way to follow. I'd give it a 3 out of 5.
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justhere4kpop · 1 year
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~Beautiful Stranger~
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Pairing: Yunho x Reader. (The guys are involved at some point too but not romantically.) NonIdol! AU
Description: A lonely perpetually single grad student working at a museum is approached by a handsome man, he looks expensive. Maybe this is your chance to get swept off your feet. Maybe he wants something else.
Warnings: I don't censor myself so I don't censor the characters, so Language warning. Let me know if I missed anything.
taglist: @legohwa, @hwaightme
a/n: Okay! I was originally going to make this a one-shot but I think I have too much storyline in my head to make it that way so Surprise! Series time! I'm really excited about this one so please let me know what you guys think, I'm having so much fun writing it already.
Also yes the Teaser is included at the beginning of the chapter, I added some stuff to it so I just put it in.
w/c: 4258
Chapter One: Handsome Stranger
The blaring sound of my morning alarm disturbs the dreams of a man sweeping me off my feet, his voice no longer sweet as honey but now Kick It by NCT 127. I guess I’m getting introduced to some New Thangs today  So it was going to be that kind of day, no school but long hours at work as a gallery attendant but also archivist in training, the latter being an unpaid internship…of course. Yeah, long day. I got up, finally silencing my alarm and pulling myself out of my full sized bed, the only luxury I could afford on my own, to drag myself down the hallway to our shared bathroom and brush my teeth. Let’s hope I’m awake enough to remember not to drink Orange Juice again as I look for breakfast. Now how long until I have to catch my train? And if I miss it how long until the bus? It’s not a terrible walk but I need to eat. Maybe I can get to Uni from here. Why does London have to be so confusing!
I’m not originally from the UK but my parents moved back and forth for a variety of things while I was growing up so it’s like a second home. I came here for my graduate program in Art History and made a few friends…moved in with them and now there’s 5 people in an apartment made for 3. We all go to University College London and live off campus in the cheapest place we could find. I was fortunate enough to get a job and internship at The National Gallery here. I’m lucky and I can pay rent but that’s about it, I’m by no means well off and trust me I could use a few extra of any sort of money. 
“You’re up early y/n” William, my flatmate’s boyfriend said passing by the open door.
“Work.” was all I mumbled as I head back to my room to pick out my outfit for the day. I stayed up writing this stupid research paper all night and what do I have to show for it…the not so designer bags under my eyes. Most days are filled with a plethora of alarms going off around the same time, lucky for my flatmates, I’m the only one with work today I guess. Alright, which combination of suit pants, blouse, and jacket am I going to wear today…All Black? All Black. I finished setting everything out before heading downstairs to eat just in case I got something on my shirt again. Last time I decided to make this beautiful breakfast sandwich with a runny egg and it broke onto the bright pink blouse I had picked for the day on the tube going to work, my boss was not happy about the spill. Did I cry, yeah…hey the saying is crying over spilt milk not spilt eggs.
“Oh hi y/n!” my other flatmate's girlfriend Emma cheerily said. “I’m just making Becks some breakfast do you want any?”
“Sure Ems…thanks.” I nodded. If I didn’t have to cook I wasn’t going to complain. Oh that’s the other thing you should know, I’m the only one single in this apartment anymore…or flat. Whatever you want to call it. 
The two sleeping while their partners roam around are my best friends for 2 years, Becka (Rebecca) and Liz (Elizabeth), I only use their full names when I’m angry at them, there have been plenty of arguments in the small confinement of our apartment. There’s 2 bedrooms upstairs, one above the living room, one above the downstairs bedroom, the bathroom is in between the two and just up the set of stairs. Downstairs is the living room, and subsequent dining area. Kitchen is just through to the back and off to the right is bedroom number 3. Yes we all share one bathroom, no it’s not as fun as it sounds. I live in the room at the front of the place above the living room. I was going to take the downstairs room because I came home late and didn’t want to wake anyone until Liz and Will got together, when they started dating they went at it like rabbits. Becka offered to switch with me since she was barely home to begin with, she and Emma had just started dating so she was with her a lot, at school doing lengthy research papers, or at her internship at the hospital. Her internship slowed down so she had a lot of time to be home and spend time with the love of her life. They’re cute don’t get me wrong…just unfortunate to be the only one single here. 
“Thanks again Ems.” I said cleaning the plate I used as I got up to finally get dressed. “It was really good, Becka is lucky to have you.”
“I certainly am.” said woman came into the room perking up at her partner. “Thank you again love.”
“I’ll be going before that breakfast makes a fast journey back up.” I laughed receiving a towel to the face. I put on the outfit I had picked out, touched up my hair so I didn’t look like I was coming out of bed, and set off for the day. Thankfully I didn’t miss my train so it was only 45 minutes to get to work. I know that sounds like a lot but it’s not so bad when you’re used to it. I get to listen to music and relax a little more before starting a long long day.
The opening of a museum is never exciting, there’s probably 10 maybe 15 guests in the first 3 hours of opening, not much to do, luckily the museum lets me work on my internship first on these long days so I’m not bored out of my mind by the time I’m done. I usually clock in around lunch time finally and sit or stand around for the rest of the day depending on what they want me to do that day. 
“Y/n” you’re going to be in Room 43 today.” my boss Henry looked at me.
“Well at least I get to look at some of my favorites today.” I sighed, knowing I was going to be on my feet for the rest of the day was not something to invoke joy. Room 43 on Level 2 had our Van Gogh, Gauguin, and Seurat paintings, most notably Sunflowers by Van Gogh, Van Gogh’s Chair, and Motherhood by Picasso. One of my favorites was-
“A Vase of Flowers, Paul Gauguin,” said the smoothest voice I’ve ever heard. Like butter melting on bread.
“Yes, one of my favorites in the room.” I smiled before turning towards the man. My breath hitched, there before me stood a man about 6 foot 1, dressed in a suit that looks like I don’t know how to pronounce the designers name, oxford shoes, no tie,his nose had a slight point to it, a jawline that looked like it was sculpted by Michelangelo, full eyebrows, his eyes soft and warm, finally his black hair. He was perfect, absolutely stunning, I wanted to look at him more than the art around me.
“Can you tell me about it?” he smiled.
“Oh, yes absolutely.” Anything to talk to him. “Painted by Gauguin in 1896, painted with Oil Paints-”
“Ah so it needs something breathable to not ruin the paints?” he smiled. “When transported for cleaning?”
“Yes, since oils are very hard to fix if damaged and excess moisture can ruin them like the whole water and oil thing... So um anyways, Paul Gauguin painted 'A Vase of Flowers' when he arrived in Tahiti for his second stay in 1895. The vase is bursting with exotic flowers including hibiscus, white and yellow frangipani and white tiare. The flowers look as though they are past their best as some blossoms have fallen onto the table. This suggests that Gauguin was not interested in the horticultural detail but instead the decorative shapes and interweaving of colors of the display.”
“Very interesting.” his smile grew. “Sorry one of my friends is very interested in this piece but I never knew what it was painted with.”
“Excuse me ma’am.” an older woman called my attention. “I had a question about this piece.”
“Oh, well I’m glad I could help sir. I’m y/n.” I shook his hand. “Please let me know if you have more questions.I’ll um..be over there” I nodded, giving him time to look at the painting. A handsome stranger interested in learning about one of my favorite pieces…he’s probably married. I’m going to be alone forever.
“Thank you beautiful.” he flashed a smile my way. 
The beautiful stranger hung around for quite some time staring at the piece, he even had a notebook where he wrote some notes and made a sketch of the painting. No I wasn’t staring at him…okay maybe I totally was but it’s not everyday you see someone that attractive in here, he was practically an art piece himself. No I wasn’t fantasizing about him taking me away in some fancy car with the engine revving going way to fast down the street to a fancy restaurant where the prices aren’t even on the menu and he tells me not to worry about it and to order what I like, he’d probably call me something cheesy like baby, honey, sweetheart, dear, starlight, honey bun….darling…his. NO! Oh my god you can’t fantasize about that stuff he asked you a question. You really are deprived. 
Work was the same as ever after the man left, I was stuck making sure no one touched the art until the museum closed and then I got to go home after clocking out. Back to the happy couples…I put on my earbuds and walked to the station, after staring at someone all day I wasn’t really ready to be reminded I was single forever. Oh well, no choice…maybe I’ll stop and get food and just head up to my room so they won’t notice.
“Hey y/n!” a voice yelled in the tunnel. “Aww hey do you have your earbuds in?” he tapped my shoulder.
“I have mace!” I whipped around feeling someone tap me. Oh. “Wooyoung! Don’t scare me that way!” I hit him gently and took my earbuds out.
“Heading home?” he asked.
“Yeah, I just got off work.”
“I was hoping you were going to say a date,” he sighed.
“Can’t find one. I stare at paintings from the 1800s all day.” I chuckled and nudged him. “Let me know if you find Degas or Van Gogh walking around, I’m pretty sure I know more about them than myself at this point.”
“I’ll be sure to point them your way.” he smiled. “Not even one of your coworkers huh?”
“I went out for drinks a while ago with David but he was so boring, no spice you know. Plus he’s one of those water is too spicy guys.”
“Oh yeah, ew.”
“I don’t know, maybe I’m just always going to be single. I just want someone…who’s a little interesting you know?”
His eyes lit up, he had heard that sentence a few days ago from someone else, he knew what to do.
“Well maybe I have this friend?” he started.
“Oh god not matchmaker Woo again.” I rolled my eyes as we got on the train.
“Hey look I really thought you two would hit it off.”
“Woo he just wanted to make his ex jealous…and I ended up with a ruined dress and a large bill.”
“I apologized and paid you back for his meal. I’m sorry!”
“I know you did.”
“Okay but seriously, this guy is one of my best friends, he’s got some money, he’s actually single single, like hasn’t had a partner in years single, he likes art, he’s tall, he’s not a scumbag, and he’s interesting. I promise you’ll like him.” he pleaded.
“Woo I just-”
“Pleaseeee just one date and then if you don’t like him you can tell me to fuck off whenever you want, please please please!”
“Okay okay fine…one date. Just…one ok?” I sighed. I trust Wooyoung. I do. He's a good friend, great even…his matchmaking skills are just…hit or miss.
“You won’t regret it, and be sure to thank me at the wedding!” he got up at his stop.
“Woo there won’t-!” the doors closed… “be a wedding.” I groaned. Just what have I gotten myself into.
“Hey sour puss what’s with the face?” Liz asked as I came in.
“Ran into Wooyoung on the train.”
“Oh how’s he doing? Also what did he do, you’re not in a bad mood every time you see him” she smiled. “Will is in the bathroom.” I motioned to head up and stopped at her words
“He begged me to go on a blind date with someone he knows.”
“Oh god because that worked out so well last time.” she smiled.
“What did?” Becka came into the room.
“Woo set y/n up on a blind date…again.” Liz smiled.
“Oh god, you have my number I will come get you.” Becka chuckled.
“He promised it wouldn’t be as bad this time but I don’t know I’m still worried.” I rubbed my arm. “He did apologize for last time but still…that was so bad.”
“Do you know anything about this one?” Liz asked.
“Apparently he’s tall, very single, likes art, and has money?” I said remembering what Wooyoung told me on the train.
“Ooo tall handsome rich single man?” They both chuckled. “How does Wooyoung know someone like that?”
“Beats me honestly, but I said I would try…even though I regret it already.”
“And when is said date?” Becka asked.
“Dunno….he’ll probably text me about it later.” I sighed. “I mean I guess it couldn’t be too bad to try.”
“It’s probably worse to trust Woo than to go on the date.” Liz smiled and Will came down.
“Who’s got a date?�� he asked.
“y/n” Liz said and made room on the couch for her boyfriend.
“Oh y/n has a date?” Emma sat next to Becka.
“I’m off to bed, it looks like a date night.” I waved. 
No need to be reminded I’m still…very much single.
~~~~~~~~~
“Hyung Hyung Hyungie Hyung-ah Hyunghyunghyung” Wooyoung began annoying the older man at his desk.
“Yes Wooyoung?” Yunho looked up from his computer, blueprints and notes scattered around the desk. “Do you need another reference photo or something?”
“No no that’s fine, it’s all coming together.” Wooyoung brushed the man off. “I found you the perfect date!”
“Woo we’ve talked about this, I don’t date.” he sighed.
“No no listen really, she's perfect for you, she’s single and lives with two other couples so she’s practically begging to get out, she doesn’t ask a lot of questions, she knows a bunch about art and everything.”
“Wouldn’t that make it easier for us to get caught Wooyoung? She could tell fakes from the real ones?”
“Nah her eyesight is too bad for that unless she’s up close and personal. She could help us out with transporting them properly, you know, how to keep them undamaged. Plus she’s really pretty, you’d like her…oh and she’s funny, sarcastic, looks good on your arm at a party.”
“Why don’t you date her then?”
“Oh hyung don’t be silly, you’re the one getting old, you need to settle down, don’t you want to spend time with someone, you know spend some of that money on them, have someone besides us…help relieve some stress?”
“We’re the same age Wooyoung.” he closed his laptop.
“Oh no, my birthday is in November, yours just passed.”
The room got quiet.
“You’re not letting this go until I say yes are you?”
“Oh come on just one date! You’ll like her, I bet you’ll even get married come on! Please please please please please please please please please please please please pleasepleasepleaseplease-”
“Okay!!...Okay fine, just one date, and we’re not-” Wooyoung left. “Getting married…”
Yunho couldn’t help but think of the beautiful stranger he met at the museum earlier, he caught her staring a few times but couldn’t bring himself to say more in case she got suspicious, but man did he want to, her smile was infectious, her clothing choices mimicked his own, she knew about the art he wanted…but he’s a criminal, no one would ever want to be with a criminal, it’s not that he can’t do the time he just wouldn’t want to drag someone else into it, although he certainly wouldn’t mind coming out to that beautiful face…if he ever got caught that is, he has no plans on making that a reality. 
“One date.” he sighed to himself.
~~~~~~~~~~
I smoothed over the dress I chose for tonight, Wooyoung couldn’t wait to text me and tell me his friend said yes. Why did I bother saying yes this is…no let’s..let’s be hopeful, maybe he’ll be nice, and funny, and hopefully a little good-looking….please Wooyoung…don’t do this to me.
“You look gorgeous y/n!” Emma and Liz squealed, their partners on the couch. 
“We definitely won’t be seeing you tonight.” Becka chuckled.
“Oh please I’m definitely not going to sleep with this guy, it’s the first date and it’s a Wooyoung blind date.” I rolled my eyes.
“I mean if he’s lucky we won’t see you tonight.” Liz laughed. “He’ll certainly only have his eyes on you this time.”
“One can hope” I groaned. “I better go, I don't want to show up late.” I grabbed my purse and a long black coat to keep warm. Of course there’s a hole in the pocket…I really need to get this fixed. 
“It’s going to be warm out, just forget the coat and get it fixed later.” Liz called out. “Go go! You’ll be late.”
It feels weird to walk around the city in just a dress and heels, I feel a little exposed but it’s not any different from the other people I’ve seen I guess…I made my way to the station to go to the restaurant Wooyoung had picked out, he told me to dress fancy so I got the fanciest dress I could. Black and white, a little lace, elegant but not over the top, stops at the knee, a cute little black heel and my hair pulled up into one of those fancy buns. Hopefully I remembered my glasses this time in my bag.
When Jung Wooyoung says fancy restaurant he wasn’t kidding, I’m pretty sure an appetizer here costs my entire rent, there’s not even prices on the menu how am I supposed to afford-
“Miss y/n?” A voice called. Sounds….familiar?
“Yes?” I turned around and it was the guy from the museum. “Oh hello.” I blushed
“It’s nice to see you again, are you waiting for someone?”
“My um..my friend set me up on this..silly blind date.” I chuckled lightly.
“How funny me too.” he smiled. “I wouldn’t be rude to assume you know a Jung, Wooyoung?”
“That would be the one.” I nodded gently.
“Well how funny would it be if I told you the very person sent me here on a silly blind date as well?”
“Well I suppose that would be…quite nice actually.” I sighed. “Last time I let him talk me into this…it didn’t go well.”
“Ah I know the feeling. She went after her ex after spending 30 minutes with me.” he chuckled.
“Ironic, mine used me to get back with his ex.”
“Now isn’t that just something.” he offered his hand to me. “Shall we go in?”
“How gentlemanly.” I let out a chuckle.
“Oh I’m Yunho by the way, Jeong Yunho.” 
“Oh a James Bond type I see. Last name first.” I chuckled. “Y/n L/n. Sorry I went the other way.”
“Oh god!” they both thought. “It’s you from the museum! What should I do?...stay calm, it’s just a date.”
I never thought I’d thank Wooyoung for setting me up on a date but, I might after this one…he’s so…he’s almost too perfect to be true, he’s interested in what I do, he’s charming, funny, he’s handsome…I..I almost feel like I’m dreaming. I’m pinching myself and not waking up so this has to be real, please be real. If this is a prank Wooyoung I’m never speaking to you again. 
“I should warn you beautiful, I’m quite dangerous.” he chuckled
“Oh are you now? Maybe I should’ve brought a bat.”
Time felt forgotten, it passed by so fast but so slow. Before we knew it the restaurant was closing and asking us to leave.
“Oh don’t worry about the bill.” he waved his hand at me reaching for my wallet. “It’s on me tonight.”
“I couldn’t possibly let you-”
“I insist beautiful.” he smiled and handed the waiter his card….A Black Credit Card!??!?! Oh my god.
“Next time is on me.” I said my cheeks were heating up. “A-As long as it’s pizza.” I joked…not really.
“Pizza sounds perfect if you’re there.” he winked. Oh man he is dangerous. “Can I walk you home? Or perhaps drive you?” he beeped his car…his very expensive silver car. A Rolls Royce?
“Oh my god.” I whispered. “What do you do?” I laughed.
“Oh I just inherited a lot of money from my uncle.”
“Oh sure, do you sell organs on the black market?” I nudged him gently.
“Oh no way, blood freaks me out.” he laughed. “I invest.”
“Sure.” I smiled and got in the car.
“Where to?” he asked.
“Oh right.” I gave him my address and we were off. It was bittersweet driving with him, I really didn’t want it to end yet. If this was going to be my only date with Yunho then…I just wanted to feel special for a little while longer. “Um, would you mind if we made a short stop first? It’s just…a really nice night out and I don’t want to…with my roommates and all.”
“Sure, I wouldn’t mind staying out myself.” he smiled.
“There’s a park just up ahead.” I said bashfully. “We could just…walk around?”
“I like that idea.” he pulled over to the park and before I could even think about opening my door he had sprinted around the car to open it.
“Ever the gentleman.” I stepped out and he offered his arm.
We walked around the park for a little just continuing our conversations from earlier, he shared about his childhood days, some of the stuff he and his brother used to do, his friends and how he met Wooyoung. It was all great until a breeze swept through.
“Here.” he shrugged off his coat and pulled it around me. “Better?” he smiled and his touch on me lingered slightly.
“Better.” I whispered and looked at him. “Thank you.”
“Sure.” he cleared his throat and pulled back slightly. 
It was close to 11pm when we finally decided we had been out long enough, I would hopefully not get hazed about the date and he would hopefully be able to go back to whatever he wanted. Even if it was just one date, it felt like a million and it just felt wonderful.
“Oh your coat.” I started taking it off as we pulled up to my little flat.
“Just give it to me next time Beautiful.” he smiled and put his hand up to stop me.
“Are you sure?”
He nodded.
I leaned over the center console and kissed his cheek leaving a slight pink imprint there.
“Goodnight Yunho, thank you for the…probably most perfect night of my life listening to me talk about work.” I smiled and got out of the car. I’ll miss him.
“Goodnight Beautiful.” he smiled more to himself as he drove off when she walked in her front door.
Did I receive the interrogation of a lifetime? Yes absolutely.
Could I stop smiling? No..Not at all. He listened to me ramble about work and school and how overwhelming it is, he listened to me talk about different paints and how to preserve them and take care of them like it was the most interesting thing he ever heard. I almost hate him for how perfect he is.
“Jung Wooyoung, I'm going to kill you.” I said as he picked up the phone.
“What?! Why!? What happened!?” he sat up on the other line.
“How could you literally give me that after all the shit dates you’ve set me up on!”
“Was it bad? You guys have been out for hours!”
“No! It was amazing! I can’t believe you!” I groaned and flopped onto my bed. “He was…kind and sweet and charming and caring and…everything and I hate you for it.”
“...BECAUSE I WAS RIGHT???”
“BECAUSE YOU WERE RIGHT!” I sat up. “Why did you have to be right!?”
“Because I’m amazing, excuse you. You liked him.”
“Yes.”
“You liked him a lot?”
“Wooyoung I literally would drop everything right now to just listen to his laugh.” I sighed. “It's pathetic.”
“I’ll let you know what he says, I just heard the front door.”
“No Wooyoung please, it's fine. I’ll see you in class tomorrow.” I sighed. “I’ll have to give you his coat too.”
“He gave you his coat? Oh my god. See marriage.”
“Goodnight Woo.”
“I’m the matchmaker god after all.”
“Goodnight! Woo.” I hung up. I hate this.
I hate men.
`Next
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