#because like by doing that you *are* cutting off part of the mlm community.

[mcytblr-archive]

Early MCYTblr Interviews: ilyuqi

today's interviewee is ilyuqi, who joined both MCYTblr and dreamlying after quitting twitter. below, under the cut, is a transcript of their audio messages responding to the questions.

Q: You were on Twitter before you moved to Tumblr– was there a specific reason for that change?

A: Yes! I got canceled! (Haha, very funny). Yeah, that’s kind of the crux of it, I got canceled pretty hard (to a point where, even though I might have had a chance to maybe regain my reputation and continue using my stan account, I just didn’t want to at that point.) I’d already been in so much drama before that (some warranted, some unwarranted), for example one of the things that people got on me for was that I wasn’t Sapnap-focused enough on my twitter account, and there was just an element of responsibility I felt, harboring a stan account with that many followers, as pretentious as that sounds. 

It was just no longer fun for me anymore. And now people were creating these multi-thousand-liked cancel threads against me citing my friendships with other people, and then also harboring real-life kind of things on me, for example, like, someone was accusing me of mlm fetishizing, and although I don’t think that’s the most serious accusation (Within the realm of internet discourse. Over the internet specifically, that’s a pretty “eh” thing to get canceled for), I just felt like – I was like, I didn’t do that, though! But I felt like my words were purposefully twisted and misinterpreted just because y’know, a lot of people also didn’t like me on that platform. So I just found it easier to go “yeah, I’m gonna go ahead and quit twitter, this isn’t fun for me anymore, the point of having a stan account is that, you know, I want to feel a part of a community” and I just didn’t feel that anymore, so I found it reasonable to just go ahead and like. Quit being a stan account. 

I think I might've privately stanned them on, you know, private accounts for a while, but then I one day ended up randomly answering someone’s question about dreamlying on tumblr, and then that spiraled into me actually becoming a critblr account. I never really intended that to happen, I thought it would be a fun thing of answering a couple of asks, but then suddenly it was, like, hundreds of asks and I was just like “woah!”. If you scroll back far enough on my tumblr, you’ll see that this really was never supposed to be a critblr. Like, I think you can still find my essays about, like, y’know, Girl Meets World from 2017? 2018? I have no idea, there’s no concept of time. But what I’m getting at is that, you know, the shift– the getting off twitter was definitely intentional, but the shift to tumblr, it was kind of just events. Y’know? It just kind of happened, but the main reason I left twitter was because of the cancellation, and I guess it just ended up transitioning into me moving onto tumblr.

Q: What was your experience being in the “fringe” of MCYTblr? 

A: My experience being on the fringe of Minecraft Youtube tumblr– I guess I should say that I didn’t really feel, like, a difference in my experience, which is illogical– I am perfectly aware of the fact that my blog and the community I participated in was very different from the minecraft youtube tumblr community as a whole. 

But I guess because I was never a part of the [larger] minecraft youtube tumblr community in the first place, I didn't really feel that lack. So for me, being on critblr was just– for me, that was minecraft youtube tumblr, you know? And I think that’s a very unique experience. I think many critblr blogs had the experience of being on minecraft youtube tumblr and then transitioning into being critblr, but for me, it was just immediately critblr. I never had the “idolizing my content creators” stan period while I was on Tumblr– I say that in heavy quotes– I never had that on Tumblr, I had already done that on Twitter. So I think it resulted in me not feeling a difference, I was just like. “Yeah this is– critblr is minecraft youtube tumblr for me, this is the only context in which I would want to talk about minecraft youtube on tumblr”. 

So I guess for me, my experience was just being on tumblr. I enjoyed answering the asks, I enjoyed making jokes, I was perfectly awake that sometimes I was saying crazy things, but for me it was just fun, so I just did it anyway. It should be noted that, for the majority of the time I had my blog, I think I was like sixteen, seventeen? So that might explain a lot of the stuff I said. But for me, again, it was normal. I did not feel a lack from being on critblr. For me, that was minecraft youtube tumblr. 

Q: Were you ever harassed for being part of critblr? 

A: I would say no. I never really felt harassed for being on critblr. At that point, I wasn't– like, my friends, they were all aware that I was on critblr, and none of them really had anything mean to say about it. At the time, those were the only opinions that mattered to me, so it was just kind of like. Eh. 

I think if I received any harassment ever, I– I don’t even think I can count it as harassment, it was just people who disagreed with my opinions, and were like, “this is crazy of you to say”. And in hindsight, I'm sure I deserved some of it. But harassment? No. While I was on twitter, I had adults attempting to cyberstalk me, doxx me, create these insane cancel threads on me (all while I was like fifteen years old), and to me, that was harassment. I would see familiar faces popping up in my dms to send me gore, send me death threats. I never experienced anything like that on tumblr. I think probably the craziest thing that ever happened to me on tumblr was some friend of mine sending an ask littered with slurs because they were mad at a critblr opinion that i had. That's probably the craziest thing I've ever had happen to me. I’m not friends with that person anymore. But harassment? No. I don't think I ever really, you know, got harassment. I think I had people who definitely didn’t like me, but I don't think I would count that as harassment.

Q: Do you remember any specific discourse/drama from that time?

A: I will say that a majority of the really really old discourse stuff, I experienced through twitter, not tumblr. So for example, the “Dream Native American war cry” situation, the “r slur” stuff, the spreadsheet, those all came through twitter for me. I experienced those while being active on twitter. 

The ones that I remember that I experienced through tumblr were specifically the “Dream kkk edit”, and then there was also an internal critblr affair where this account called mctruther or mcyttruth (I can’t remember, one of the two) made this giant callout post dedicated mostly towards Jason lmanburg. I remember this pretty vividly mainly because I wrote a callout, like, a response to the callout post, and uh, personally I found the post to be very silly. They were criticizing Jason and other people for using stuff like kiwifarms and being a part of ebblr, I think, and it was just very odd, and I didn't vibe with it. So I made a callout post, and I was just like “I don't agree with what you’re saying”. 

But yeah, no, so personally the Dream kkk edit  is what kind of made me go “okay, I don’t think I want to talk about Dream discourse anymore”. Because before this, for me, my critblr account was mostly dedicated to talking about the relationships that Dream had with his family, and George, and Sapnap, and other content creators, the internet in general– sometimes, I talked about Ranboo, and y’know like, what I thought his fans were doing for his face reveal? As in, y’know, they were hyping him up too much and he was getting visibly more and more insecure. But for Dream, you know, I think I was able to always maintain like, “yeah, I think he’s done a lot of shitty stuff in the past, but I think he’s perfectly capable of growth and learning, because he’s always owned up to his mistakes”, but the Dream kkk edit was one where he gave lies so quickly to try and cover his ass, and then gave this halfhearted apology in which he really rubbed me the wrong way. 

I obviously had no problem saying this, obviously I’m going to find a kkk edit pretty despicable, but I had people in my inbox arguing with me whether or not a kkk edit is really a mark of someone being antisemitic, or racist. They even debated whether or not the edit itself was racist or not, and I just kind of had to take a step back cause I’m like, “C’mon guys, like, I think if this happened in real life, y’know, this would Not be the conversation occurring right now, but you guys are giving so much leeway to this, like, random white guy over the internet.’ Like, I don’t want to have to debate with people whether or not racism is real. I wanna talk about GeorgeNotFound’s visa, and I wanna talk about Ranboo’s face reveal! I don’t want to talk about like– I don’t want to try and convince you that racism is real, that is not what I want to do. That is very exhausting, honestly. Cause, like– I don’t know, it was just very disheartening to see this community go down that route. And I was just kinda like “Okay, no,” and I think I made a big post that was just like “Hey. I’m no longer going to address Dream’s controversies, because they seem to be going down a route where I'm going to have to defend things that I know to be true, basic things I know to be true, and I have to defend them like I'm already wrong. And I don’t wanna do that, that’s too much for me.'' So yeah, that’s kind of the biggest discourse that I remember from critblr from when I joined it. 

Of course there were other things too, from the very very beginning. Like, I don’t know if any one of your interviews has talked about it, but misogynap was one of my favorite things on tumblr in 2020. Because like, I fully agreed, I was like yeah! Sapnap does give off misogynistic vibes! It’s really weird! And I vibed with that– but you could never say that on twitter. 

I think what made me the angriest about this whole thing– there were tons of things that made me angry, y’know, I didn’t vibe with the argument that he was, like, 15 years old therefore he was a dumb fifteen-year-old. I was like okay, I've been fifteen, I've never done anything like that before. But what definitely pissed me off was the fact that he immediately tried to deny it, and I was like dude, c’mon. Like, these are some pretty serious allegations and accusations, and you just decided to deny them, and you’re like “Augh! It’s just my stupid antis!” and it’s like, no, you made that edit!

And then when he owned up to it, he basically said something along the lines of “some people grow up with kindness surrounding them… I was not, and I grew up with hate… and therefore, this is the byproduct of that :(“ and I– I dunno. I don’t wanna say I get what he’s saying, but I think that is an incredibly, incredibly privileged take, to be able to say that. Like, I grew up with hate, therefore I also started hating. There are plenty of people in this world surrounded by hate all the time, and they don’t grow up to do that kind of stuff. And the fact that Dream’s stans took that and they were like, “oh my god he’s such a good person, I love that he apologized so well!” I was just kinda like guys. Come on, like this is a white guy being like “It’s just not my fault, it’s not my fault that I was so freakin racist as a kid! It’s just not my fault!”. Like, we’re all capable of making choices. Sorry. Sorry, does that sound too harsh? I’m sorry.

But that definitely was kind of my breaking point, to be like “Yup! I’m not gonna be debating dream controversies anymore, because if this is the kind of person he is, this isn’t someone I want to playfully speculate on. This is some serious stuff, this is not my forte, no.”

Q: How do you feel that the overall culture and in-jokes of critblr differed from “main” MCYTblr?

A: Like I've said before, I don't know if I'm the best person to make the differentiation between main mcytblr and critblr, only because I never felt the difference because I jumped right into critblr. Even before, in like 2020 when I was a lurker, I was lurking on georgeeehd’s blog, wormweeb’s blog, etc etc. I never really interacted with normal minecraft youtube tumblr. I guess maybe the closest I might've gotten to that is endercores? But we actually ended up meeting over twitter, and that’s where we became friends, we never really interacted on tumblr. So honestly, I don't know if I'm the best person to ask that question.

I just kind of would say that, going off of vibes alone, it’s that critblr was a lot more okay with poking fun at content creators for their jokes and making jokes at their expense, while main mcytblr jokes definitely lined up with more traditional stan culture, praising and uplifting their CCs. That’s kind of the most basic generalization I can give, but I personally would have no interactions to give you in main mcytblr.

Q: Similarly, how do you think the culture of MCYT tumblr differed from MCYT twitter?

A: So this is something I can definitely give you a lot on, the difference between minecraft twitter and tumblr. I think that the main difference between the jokes and the culture, honestly, between twitter and tumblr, was in direct correlation with the fact that the content creators being discussed were on twitter, but weren’t on tumblr. 

On twitter, you were faced with the possibility that these men might respond to your tweets at any time. You might make a harmless joke, but they might come after you for it. You might give valid criticism that’s meant to be shared amongst stans as kind of like a thinkpiece, you know, like “what do we think of this?” and you could get the men themselves in your replies, and completely change the trajectory of how that post was supposed to be taken. I have direct experience with this, so I can tell you firsthand, there were times where I made tweets and I had people kind of going like “Yeah, I do agree with you, I do agree with that!’ and then Dream (or whoever) replies, and they immediately go “oh, that’s so true Dream! Good job Dream! Yeah, yeah, yeah!” and I’m like guys, c’mon. Come on. You know? It was like that for me. 

But on tumblr, you really didn’t have to fear that! You knew that your post was going to remain in stan circles. Back then, I barely remember anyone screenshotting from tumblr to take onto twitter– I don’t remember that happening very often. I know it happened, just not very often. So you could really say whatever you wanted on tumblr, and not be absolutely crucified for it. For example, misogynap! Like, people were just calling Sapnap a casual misogynist on tumblr, and no one got in trouble for it. But, on twitter, Sapnap got super offended at someone saying “Eh, I think Sapnap might smell like cheetos and weed!” and he actually went through the process of making sure all of his friends blocked that one specific person, just because they said “Eh, I think Sapnap smells like cheetos and weed.”

So there was a very very different culture. They kind of made it so that twitter had to have that stan, like, idolization going for them, because if you didn’t, if you made jokes at their expense, they would come for you and they would get their stans on you, and you had to just pray that they also see what you said as a joke, otherwise they’re gonna pounce on you, too. I don’t know. I think that’s probably the biggest difference, the fact that the content creators were on twitter and not tumblr changed a lot of how you could make jokes and how you could act on those platforms. I don’t know, you can take that however you’d like.

Q: Looking back, a large amount of 2021 critblr culture revolved around doxxing and sharing personal information– what was that like? What’s your current perspective on it, looking back?

A: So, doxxing. Very interesting topic. I guess what I first want to start out with is: do I want to call it doxxing? No, probably not. I don’t think what anyone (or at least, what I saw anyone doing) was doxxing, or would be ever considered doxxing. I think if you really wanted to put a label on it, you could say “being invasive”. But is that illegal, or a crime? No, it’s not. Everything that I know that  people found was just, you know, public information on the internet, and it wasn’t obtained via illegal means, no one was hacking into bank records, no one was– [laughs] I don't know, stealing house papers? This was all just stuff that was online, available for the public to see. You just had to know how to find it. 

I would say for a while there– this was not on tumblr, this was on twitter– there was almost a competitive aspect to it, to see who could find what, but this was very strictly on twitter. This was– or, at least in my experience, this was on twitter. But on tumblr, it was just kind of like “Eh, if you know, you know”. Y’know? Like, it’s not like anyone’s making these blogs, and they’re like, uploading bios of Dream, George, and Sapnap, and have their addresses, and like their parents’ names and everything, it was just kind of like “if you know, you know”. 

I guess the big thing is like, do you regret it, how do you see it looking back. And while I can say “Y’know, probably not the best thing for a bunch of teenagers to be doing in their spare time”, I cannot say that I fully regret it, because these are men who are known to take the fact, like– known to take people’s lack of information and twist it and try to use that lack of information in their best interests. 

To kind of give you a feel of what I’m trying to say, think about Manatreed, right? That was a straight up abuser that Dream was housing and trying to platform onto the dream smp, which is a fandom composed of mostly minors and mostly teenage girls. Dream tried to do that! Dream might have gotten away with it, if people did not dig into his life and figure out who Manatreed was, and therefore figure out what this guy had done in the past, and then been able to put pressure on Dream for it. I cannot see something like that and say “Ooh, but being invasive is bad!” Like, I don’t know, I don’t wanna say they brought it upon themselves, because that’s a bit much, but at the same time, what would have happened if people hadn’t doxxed them? Manatreed would have just been on the SMP forever, like, no one would have known that! That’s kind of scary to think about. Like, in a way, yeah, sometimes things like that are important. And you know, again, everything was found through perfectly legal means, nothing was done illegally, and at the end of the day, the Dream SMP was free of an abuser. (In the end, considering recent events, does that really matter? Since half of the Dream SMP were all, like, abusers or allowed abuse to continue? Whatever– we’re not gonna talk about that.) 

But you get what I'm saying. I can’t look at a situation like that and say “Yeah, I regret like, doxxing or being a part of that community”. Cause at the end of the day, these men were hiding a lot of things, and they would have gotten away with a lot more if people weren’t so… I don't wanna say vigilant, but you know what I mean? I feel like you understand what I’m trying to say here. There was definitely an element of necessity, when it came to situations like those.

Q: Which criticisms do you think hold up? Which didn’t?

A: There is one criticism that I think has held up very very well, and it’s the fact that I believe that Dream is no longer going to change his behavior or make any real efforts to become a better person from his last mistake, because he has no real reason to. Because he now has stans that will enable and back him up through basically anything. There have been– I mean, I stand by that. I totally stand by that. He is able to basically do anything and kind of be untouchable for it. 

Even when the grooming accusations were going on, and the Gumball beef was going on, and most of the internet hated him, he still had stans backing him up. And those exact stans are the reason he was able to come back onto twitter, and now has his platform again, and people praise him and say like “Yeah, yada yada, Dream made a response video,” when that response video really did nothing! It was genuinely nothing, it was just a bunch of– like, he just talked into the mic for two hours. He didn’t prove or disprove anything for me. For me, it was just like, okay? You’ve given me nothing here. The thing is, though, his stans will take it, they will enable him basically through anything. And when you have people that, even at your worst, still see you as being the best, why would you want to change? Why would you feel the need to put in the effort to change your behavior if the people that give you your money don’t care about that, you know?

So that’s something I still stand by, that Dream isn’t going to change anymore, even if he says that he is, it’s going to be very disingenuous. Because at the end of the day, he knows he has stans backing him up. He has no personal gain in changing, and therefore, he won’t. 

Q: Is there anything else you’d like to add, or have archived on the blog?

A: I’ll say that I joined dreamlying in August of 2020, so a few months after it was created. I would say that it’s definitely insane to me that dreamlying has managed to keep its infamous status in the minecraft youtube sphere, just because we are all so vastly different from when it first began. So to see people still refer to us that way is just a little insane. I don’t even know if I’m really included in the “us” cause again, I joined a little bit late, but to me– that’s the thing, though! I think when other people think of dream lying, they think of these massive critblr blogs, but when I think of dreamlying I’m like, “these are the guys that I do movie night with”. Like, “haha these are my best friends”. You know? 

That’s another thing, I think people were genuinely surprised to find out that we were a friend group. Like, yes? [laughs] These are people that I genuinely love spending time with, and not in the context of minecraft youtuber-ing, it’s just like– yeah, these are my friends, and I love them dearly! And I don’t wanna get all like [various noises conveying sappiness] but these are my friends, that’s kind of how I see them. My experience as a member, like, boils down to “these are my friends! I did stuff with them that I would do with any other of my friends!” And I think it’s like a weird concept to people, because again, they view dreamlying as this kind of– they regard dreamlying with a lot of mystique, but then me, it’s just “friends :D”. “My friends, awesome friends”. I don’t know, I don’t think I’m very good at being articulate about, like, being perceived and how people perceive other people, but I guess the only word I could really use is just “insane”, that dreamlying has continued to keep its reputation, even after four years.

#early mcytblr interviews #Volume 11 #ilyuqi

[pokemenlovingmen]

A mlm pokeimagines blog? In this economy? God where have you been all my life.

Apologies in advance if its a long ask lol

Seriously though you would not believe how happy I got when I saw this blog pop up! Barely any mlm reader stuff so finding you got my lil poke men loving heart all excited!

If requests are open I was wondering if you could do Emmets reaction to a male reader who loves the fact that Emmet is so blunt? I've seen some stuff like this in the past were reader loves Emmet DESPITE him being so blunt but I love him because of it!! I find it useful and charming!! I have a hard time understanding most people because I'm bad at picking up subtext and stuff in conversation so characters like Emmet that are just blunt and honest are always appreciated!

Also, claiming 🐗 boar anon in advance lol

Hi hi boar anon!!! I’m glad you like my blog so much! I literally made it bc I couldn’t find enough male reader content, and as a trans guy that gendered language is really affirming to me. Also not being courageous enough to get into a relationship with real human people lmao I gotta be gay somehow!! Literally all of you who’ve come to visit me on this blog are so sweet. I changed the blog description up for a reason, it really does feel like I’ve invited a bunch of funny gay guys into my living room and we’re all sitting in a circle whispering about boys. Doing this makes me feel so stupidly comfortable in my own skin and so much like a part of the LGBT community when I’ve had to stand on the sidelines most of my life, I just can’t explain how stupidly therapeutic writing imagines for fictional men from a fictional monster battling game is LMFAOOO

And we’re always here for supporting the autism shit lol, you can pry my autistic submas out of my cold dead hands, my submas will always be pretty heavily headcanoned and a post appreciating those verrry autistic coded traits is a huge win for me :) Emmet deserves to be loved for just being Emmet

Straight (Gay) to the Point— Emmet x Male Reader

⚪️ — Emmet and Ingo have grown up with a lot to be self conscious about, from their appearances to the behavioral quirks they share and the quirks they don’t. Kids can be cruel when you’re neurodivergent so different. So when you get together with Emmet and he comes to realize you LIKE his speaking patterns, he’s floored.

⚪️ — Emmet has always had a lot to say, but he’s quite bad at phrasing things. Compared to his brother who is a constant stream of consciousness, just prattling on about anything and everything that crosses his mind once you get him into conversation, Emmet needs to carefully plan out each word and it never comes out how he wants. Sometimes it feels like with his more approachable appearance (even if some call it creepy) and Ingo’s ability to talk (even if some say he rambles too much), they’re just two halves of one fully functional person. But you like him. Not his brother. Not him and his brother. You like him. How crazy is that?

⚪️ — He doesn’t have time to waste on careful wording. Do that, and he’d be plotting his course of conversation for ages. And he’s rather aware of that fact, so one day, he offhandedly mentions that he’s sorry his bluntness can be so off-putting, and he really hopes he hasn’t said anything to offend you.

⚪️ — Imagine his surprise when you said the contrary! When he heard you liked him because he said exactly what he meant, and he was always so clear-cut and easy to understand, it was like a fuse blew in him. Growing up, he’d always heard the opposite, and while Ingo never criticized him for it, plenty of other people did call him out for being rude when he didn’t mean to be.

⚪️ — He feels verrrry comfortable in conversation with you, yes indeed. Your sense of communication with one another is very strong and any conflict gets resolved very quickly. Emmet is happy to just talk with you and not have to pretend to have conversational skills he doesn’t have. You like him, his brother likes him, that’s all that matters.

⚪️ — He wants to talk with challengers on the Battle Subway more freely, so he’ll often come to you about the best ways to translate the things he wants to say into more “socially acceptable” ways of saying them. Of course, he’s also fully aware that he can come to you and not need to jump through all those hoops.

⚪️ — Since he’s so comfortable with you, he’ll say just about anything to you or around you and knows he can say things to you that will make you laugh, while others would just shush him for it.

⚪️ — After all, nothing makes you laugh quite as hard as sitting on your bed only to hear “OH DEAR! THE GALVANTULAS ARE MATING ON THE SOFA!” from across the apartment. Like cool Emmet, you definitely did NOT need to hear that—also please make them stop??—but that got the best laugh out of you you’ve had in a while.

⚪️ — He’s genuinely just so funny without trying. Another iconic moment you can recall is when, on a Friday night, a particularly inebriated woman was getting a bit too comfy with Emmet, which he was oblivious to at first, too preoccupied with the joy of battling. When you did tell him, though, you ended up laughing your ass off as he gasped and ran off with great urgency to apologize to the woman, as he was unable to reciprocate her advances due to both being taken and, I quote, “a homosexual”.

⚪️ — You’ve definitely made him a lot more comfortable, even in public situations, which he doesn’t seem to realize. The Battle Subway staff has regularly mentioned Boss Emmet has been way chattier than he used to be (which still doesn’t mean anything dramatic, but it’s a big step to him and that’s all it needs to be!) And anyone who has a problem with Emmet’s mannerisms can answer to you.

⚪️ — You’re more than just Emmet’s boyfriend, you gel perfectly into his family. And granted, that family is only Ingo, both of their Pokemon teams and Elesa ever since she basically adopted them, but it’s perfect anyway. It’s not like Emmet has been telling his brother about how much he wants to marry you eventually or anything.

⚪️ — You have literally so many Joltik grandchildren already.

⚪️ — Since both of you can struggle with reading other people, you often put your heads together to try and figure things out. (If it’s anything like the attempts at two neurodivergent people trying to use their combined knowledge to socially navigate that I’ve been a part of, it probably accomplishes nothing, but at least you can both relate to each other’s struggles and have a good laugh about it at the end of the day.)

⚪️ — He acts like a little kid with a crush around you and when he’s not working, he follows you around like a lost puppy.

⚪️ — He also knows that when he’s specifically feeling insecure about his mannerisms, he can lean on you for comfort, because you unashamedly love that about him. All of it. One night, after a particularly rough day, you remember him cuddling up to you and getting teary-eyed about how much you love him.

⚪️ — Please stay in his life, okay?

#pokemon x reader #emmet x male reader #emmet x reader #submas x reader #pokemon male reader #🐗

[steptoeedwall]

Introduction and reality underrated

"Let me clear my throat, let me catch my breath, let my heart bleed out till there's nothing left...

-The rock band Shinedown in the song "Brilliant"

 Howdy, my name is Steptoe Edwall. Okay, actually it's not. Here we are starting off our relationship with an untruth. I am an old trucker and Steptoe and Edwall are small towns in south central Washington state that appear on the same sign on interstate 90 and I always thought they sounded, together, like a cool, old fashioned name in a Dickensian sort of way. So, I have adopted it as my moniker for the purposes of this blog. I will provide a bit of brief biographical information. As I write this here in the spring of '22 I am dang near 61 years old. I'm happily married with three awesome grown offspring. I live in a dynamite little town in southeast Idaho and I am quite happy.  I decided to start writing this blog, the subject of which is reality, because it's therapeutic for me to write and put words and ideas together and also because I think I have something to say to a few people who might be interested. As it says in The Bible, "He who has an ear, let him hear". I have been a christian person for about 40 years and I have been the beneficiary of a great deal of blessing in the form of truth in a theological sort of way. I have been exposed to outstanding teachers and figured out some stuff myself and it turns out that reality rocks. If you are reading this and you are not a christian sort of person I would hope you would induge me for just a bit. There is actually a wonderful reality that exists that is hard to see because one must cut through a LOT of B.S. (bovine scatography) to get to a point where one can see it. And, unfortunately, much of the BS is flung about by other christian people (God bless them!) who are, to put it kindly, misinformed. Or, perhaps, deluded or willfully uninformed. Plus, well, THE WORLD LIES! I know, hard to believe. I need to have some t-shirts made up with this new slogan. Just to be clear, let me tell you, that "the world" is not your friend. It does not want what is best for you.  We will get into all of that so please hang in there.  If you made it this far I am hopefull for you. As a Christian person I am not trying to separate you from your earthly riches or control you in any way. Nor do I, as a Christian person, get some kind of Godly, MLM-esqe reward for converting you to my point of view (although for a donation of $10 I will send you a dishrag guaranteed to get the demons off your dishes, HALLELUJAH!). :) Hopefully, my motivation is love and the desire to communicate that reality, the part that's not so easy to see, and it is pretty cool... In fact, it's good news! Thanks for listening..

SE

#intro #reality #grace #love #gospel #theworld #truth

[painandalsosuffering]

my introduction thing is below the cut, please read is ur gonna follow me, thank you :)

my other blogs are:

@mattsmithslefteye (doctor who)

@postaldudeplinko (postal)

howdy, i mostly go by Crow or Evan, but I'll also respond to Tex

I use mainly They/He/It/Xe as pronouns but I'll respond to anything besides she/her.

I personally identify as genderfaun, minflexible, and abrosexual (if you want me to explain it in extreme detail I will gladly explain all of it)(and to put it short, I mostly identify as a man, and I'm mostly attracted to men, except sometimes I like women, also my attraction in general fluctuates)

I'm pagan, and I'm pretty new to it so I'm constantly learning about it.

my dms are always open if u wanna chat at all :) I just ask that unless I state it clearly, I don't want someone just coming in and venting to me, please and thank you :)

before you follow:

I swear a lot so there's that, and if you have any specific triggers you want me to tag, just let me know :)

this account has a large variety of things I reblog/post, so it's usually a big mess of interests and stuff I think is funny

also I do vent on this account but I tag it with "tw vent" and/or "vent tw"

also also if I don't like one of your posts it is because I either have already liked it or it's under a filtered tag

dni list I think:

- basic dni criteria (homophobic, transphobic, racist, sexist, etcetc)

- if you think ace/aro people aren't part of the lgbtq+ community

- if ur a terf

- I'd prefer if dsmp fans didn't interact, any current mutuals are OK but on thin ice /hj (casual mcyt fans are ok)

- if you think pedos are a part of the lgbtq+ community

- if you excuse s/a or victim blame

- if you identify as a woman and constantly enjoy mlm media only in sexual ways (shipping stuff is fine, i don't mind that. it's just those who only intake the sexual stuff that is weird as fuck)

- if ur a fan of harry potter :/

- proshippers fuck off disrespectfully

- people who ship Bruce and Jerome from Gotham fuck off disrespectfully

- if you think men can be lesbians???

a couple things I like and might post/reblog stuff about:

- Metalocalypse

- Letterkenny, Shorsey

- NHL

- Postal

- Batman, Gotham, Peacemaker, DC stuff in general

- ICP

- Star Trek

- Aqua Teen Hunger Force

there's more but I'm tired and lazy so I'll update this later

(p.s.- if we become mutuals, I'm gonna assume u wanna be friends /hj)

#introduction #ignore these other tags they are for my own help #writing ref #sometimes i yearn #very important

[the-dragongirl]

Hello tumblr. I have returned from a long period of inactivity, because I must bring the good word to the corner of the Star Wars fandom that used to be my main fannish home: there is a new era of Star Wars canon that was made just for our taste. It is called the High Republic.

WHAT IS THE HIGH REPUBLIC?

The High Republic is an giant multi-media project being carried out by the Lucasfilm story group to create a brand new era of Star Wars canon. It is set a few hundred years before the prequel era (so, a long time after the Old Republic era), in a period of peace and stability within the Republic. It currently includes several English language adult novels, a YA novel, two serialized comics, a manga, some short stories, and some short video blurbs published on facebook and youtube. A TV show for Disney+ has also been announced, but is a few years off. This project is unique in Star Wars, in that all of the different parts are being written together by one writing team, and are coordinated to tell a cohesive story. Also, what has been announced is just the beginning – they have stated that there will be three different sections of the High Republic, and everything we have had announced so far is just part one. As a note: this is an era for which there was NO pre-existing canon in Legends, so it is totally new territory.

OKAY, THAT’S NICE, BUT WHY SHOULD I BOTHER TO CHECK IT OUT?

There are SO many reasons why the High Republic is worth your time to explore. I will try to outline some of them here below the cut (without any significant spoilers).

IT IS A LOVE LETTER TO THE JEDI

This is the era for everyone who loves the Jedi and wants to understand how they got to the point they did in the prequel era. It shows Jedi at their best: saving people, working together, being completely in tune with the Force (in so many beautiful and original ways), demonstrating creativity and flexibility and being rewarded for it, actually thinking through the ethics of things like the mind trick, and DEALING with their emotions rather than repressing them. It shows us how the rigid Jedi culture was saw in the prequels was a corruption of something that was originally healthy and uplifting. Jedi in this era are allowed to be flawed, and to grow, and have a community that supports them in doing so. This is the Jedi culture so many of us created as fix it fic for the prequel era, but made canon.

IT IS AN ERA OF HOPE

There are some serious problems in the High Republic Era. Without spoilers, the era opens with a terrible humanitarian crisis, laid over the Republic equivalent of the New Deal from US history.  We see a lot of examples of people doing their best to be good to each other, and working for a more just and kind galaxy. They acknowledge that things are not perfect, but people from many different backgrounds (Jedi, politicians, farmers, pilots, business people) work together to try and make things better. I don’t know about you all, but with the darkness we see in the world today, I NEED some of that optimism in my escapist media. The High Republic provides that.

IT WILL GIVE YOU FEELINGS

The existing material so far is structured to really let you emotionally invest in the characters and their struggles. Unlike with many eras of Star Wars canon, characterization is not sacrificed for the sake of plot (though never fear, there is PLENTY of plot). That means there is huge scope for empathy. I’m not going to lie; I cried within the first three chapters of Light of the Jedi, as did several other people I know. It is POIGNANT in a way that feels truly genuine.

IT IS FUN

The writing team understands that, in the end, Star Wars is space fantasy. If your space fantasy is nothing but serious, gritty grimdark, it becomes pretentious and unbearable. So, for all that there is some heavy content in the High Republic (VERY heavy content – the Nihil should really have their own content warning), it has many moments of levity that keep it from taking itself too seriously. For example, the High Republic made Jedi bodice rippers canon. Also, characters like Geode exist (yes, that rock there is a CHARACTER). The result is something which honors the spirit of Star Wars, and keeps you engaged without being tedious or ridiculously depressing.

THE WRITING TEAM HAS DIVERSE PERSPECTIVES

The main writing team consists of five people: Justina Ireland, Claudia Gray, Charles Soule, Daniel José Older, and Cavan Scott. You will note that includes two people of color, two women, and one out Queer person (in fact, one of the writers is all three of those things). This is a far cry from the white-cis-straight-man-dominated writing teams we have seen in the past. And when they bring in other people to the project, they make a point of looking for perspectives that aren’t represented on their team – for example, the manga is being co-written between Justina Ireland and Japanese writer Shima Shinya, and Ireland has stated in interviews that Shinya is taking the lead on the writing.

IT VALUES MEANINGFUL REPRESENTATION

That diverse writing team means a cast that looks WAY more like the real world than any other era of Star Wars we’ve seen, in terms of representation. There are multiple characters of color, who are both heroes and central to the story. There are at least five canonical queer characters to date (a MLM couple, an Ace character, and two NB character).  [EDIT: Thank you @legok9​ for letting me know about the NB characters]. Among binary gendered characters, there is a very even balance of men and women. The writing team has also stated that they will be incorporating more representation of disability in the works to come. And the story is so much better for it – representation is included here BECAUSE it makes for more creative, believable, and original storytelling.

IT IS ACCESSIBLE

Because of the multiple formats, and the fact that it doesn’t rely on you knowing any prior lore, the High Republic offers many avenues to engage for people with all kinds of needs. Know nothing about Star Wars canon and feel intimidated about catching up? The canon is all new in this era anyway, so you’re fine. Can’t handle flashing lights? No problem – the little bit of video content that exists is totally free from the strobing effects that caused seizure and sensory issues. Need purely audio content? You can still have a full experience of the High Republic with the gorgeously sound-scaped audiobooks. Don’t have the attention span for books or long movies? Then the comics are your friend.

THERE IS SOMETHING FOR ALL

Between the books aimed towards adults and teens (and their respective audiobooks), the kids books, the comics, the manga, the short stories, AND the eventual TV show on Disney+, there is going to be content in the High Republic that suits most audiences. And that is just what has been announced so far – there is still more to come for phases II and III. This isn’t Star Wars written towards one group or demographic – it is Star Wars for everyone.

DID I MENTION THE FANCY JEDI UNIFORMS?

Because cosplayers and fanartists? This is the era for you. We are getting Jedi in silks with elaborate gold embroidery. Jedi with jewelry other decorative elements. Even the practical field uniforms have tooled and embossed leather. If you want to draw or make Jedi that have some of that that sweet LoTR-esque high fantasy aesthetic, the High Republic has your back. (Not going to lie – I am ALREADY imagining the time travel AUs. Put Obi-Wan in fancy clothes!)

OKAY, YOU’VE SOLD ME. WHERE SHOULD I START?

I strongly recommend everyone looking to get into the High Republic (who is old enough to be on Tumblr) start with Light of the Jedi by Charles Soule. I alternated between the physical book and the audio book, and found it delightful in both formats. After that, you have a lot of options. You can read or listen to the audio book of the YA novel A Test of Courage by Justina Ireland. You can check out the currently running Star Wars: The High Republic comic from Marvel, or the Star Wars: The High Republic Adventures comic from IDW. Or you can skip straight to Into the Dark by Claudia Gray. Honestly, there is no wrong order to try out most of the High Republic.

IN CONLUSION

The High Republic is Star Wars written for people who DON’T want Star Wars to be a good ‘ol boys club for salty white dudes who don’t want to see anything but more of Luke Skywalker. It offers broad representation, and optimistic narrative, and whole bunch of awesome Jedi content. If you are someone who fell in love with Jedi in the prequel era, the High Republic will give you more of what you loved. And if you are totally new to Star Wars? The High Republic is here for you too.

So, go check it. And then go write fic for it (please, there are only, like, 14 fics on AO3, I am dying).

#star wars #the high republic #jedi #long post #recs #book recs #representation #seriously I cannot recommend this highly enough #everything about the high republic is so very tailored to what I love about star wars in general and Jedi specifically #also...sorry I had been absent here #I swear I still love you all #I just have limited interaction spoons these days and spend most of them on costuming stuff

[hopeshoodie]

what do you think of the independent article about fusebox games??

For those who don’t know, here’s a link to the article (luckily not behind a paywall). 

In summary, we knew that Fusebox laid off all of its writers and a bunch of unity engineers on July 30th. What we didn’t know, is weeks before there was conflict about Seduction Games on matchmaker (which imo is super misogynistic and not even erotic enough to make up for it) being biphobic, and the staff wrote an open letter to management. Then they all... Got fired....

And oh boy I have THOUGHTS on it

Before even reading the article I knew what the homophobic issue the writers were concerned about was. I wrote about it when first playing Seduction Games on matchmaker (lol fuck Matchmaker)- there's a scene where the player dares the love interest to embarrass a man by pretending he's gay and making a scene. And that's just... So gross.

After reading the article I guess it was more that Seduction Games is fetishistic and treating bisexuality as a voyeuristic game for het relationships. And that's valid (but also imo not the worst thing FB has done in the department, see Boah in CMM and how they hide their mlm ships from straight players).

I want so badly to read the internal letter sent by the staff because I'm nosy but also I wish I had their words on the matter specifically. I wonder if they were more frustrated with not having control/input in Matchmaker (understandable, it was the precursor to losing their jobs), being lied to that the offending content would be removed only for it to then be released, or just that Fusebox would let offensive content be put out under their brand name to begin with.

Some other disorganized thoughts

The COO sounds like a real piece of work. I don't remember which article I read awhile ago that made it sound like the leadership (CEO and COO) changed and then Fusebox swiftly pivoted to prioritizing shorter content for an international audience. It sounds like he was a part of that. He has a ton of op eds about how to monetize free-to-play models and generally has Bad Takes. But walking out of a meeting and refusing to hear constructive criticism? What an absolute man baby. But also, doesn't he look the part

a real nathen mazri looking dude.

From a business standpoint, I see why they released Seduction Games despite their writing department vocalizing discontent with it. I've seen this shift on a bunch of other story apps. There's money in romance games that target a 13-22 year old female audience that incorporates softcore porn or questionably sexy content. It's a huge issue on Episode, which is technically a childrens app, but the stories that skirt the boundary of appropriate and not are the ones that get the most reads/gems spent/revenue. If you've played Seduction Games, you know it's exactly that. Written with really bland, simple language so that younger readers are engaged, with juvenile, surface-level romance elements and attempts at erotic writing. The characters aren't unique or interesting (the love interest is a massive creep), but it's optimized to appeal to the most amount of people. If they were planning on firing and outsourcing their writing department anyways, it's a win-win for the executives- put out content that establishes their new direction and communicate to the writing staff that they're not in control.

Fusebox's direct comments to the reporter, that their content is "subjective" and 'based on reality shows' is such an aggravating cop-out. The first is literally gaslighting their writers, saying they're reading too much into someone and it's a matter of perspective instead of just... something that they did. Like that story just IS sexist and biphobic, no wiggle room there. The second is just 'other people make bad content so we can too', which... oof. I see why the writers were mad enough to risk their jobs.

I've just got to wonder what's the financial benefit to not releasing S4. Like I totally get that they're shutting down the main LITG game to focus on Matchmaker which makes more money, but at this point we KNOW they have the S4 art assets because we've seen then in promos. They must have some if not most of the writing done, because this all went down close to the scheduled release of S4. Since Fusebox has been clear they're just money grabbing with no integrity for their story or their writers' intentions, why not just release S4? You're not going to /lose/ money- if there are art assets incomplete they can just reuse past assets or cut out scenes. It seems like it'd make financial sense to wring the last bit of gems/interest out of the LITG fandom that won't transition to matchmaker, then full pivot to matchmaker.

IDK anything about Britain's workplace protection laws (in the US it's at-will employment so retaliatory firing is a-okay as long as it's not on protected actions) but maybe in the UK it's not? Like you can't argue this is discriminatory, but it could be argued that the firing was a retaliation for the employees complaining to HR about inappropriate behavior, which is a protected action. But then again you could say that more than just the people who complained got fired so it's a moot point.

tl;dr it doesn't surprise me that Fusebox openly disrespected and antagonized their writers before the mass layoff, but it's super disappointing.

All the more reason I encourage yall to leave poor reviews on LITG/matchmaker, uninstall the games, and not give FB a penny more.

#litg #fusebox layoffs

[therefugeofbooks]

July felt like an eternity! I made good use of the time, though, and finished a book with 600 pages! I haven't been reading big books so I'm glad I didn't dfn it. Overall, July was a mix of lightheaded reads and some dark ones.

Talking about all the books I read in July under the cut!

Hide and Seeker by Daka Hermon

Spooky! I liked the concept of the story, and the execution was pretty good. I can't get tired of kids saving the day and fighting the monsters and their fears. I was pleasantly surprised by all the turns the story takes and the end as well.

Read if you want: middle-grade horror, kids saving the day, a harmless play turned dark.

The Misadventures of an Amateur Naturalist by Ceinwen Langley (x)

I didn't like the first part of the book because of the pacing and lack of the magic and romance I was hoping for, but the second part is great! See my complete review of this book here.

Lady Killer Vol. 2 by Joëlle Jones and Laura Allred (x)

It's super fun! I loved the thriller and dangers that came with Josie's new situation and was shocked at the end! I'm even more curious to see where the story will head now.

Catherine House by Elisabeth Thomas

I loved the gothic atmosphere of the story, the seclusion, the cult things, the mysterious deaths. The dark academia vibes are on point! Nevertheless, I didn't feel hooked up in the mystery, and I didn't particularly care for the main character.

The Queer Principles of Kit Webb by Cat Sebastian

Oh, this was lovely! I loved the romance, the characters, and their backgrounds, and all the action of it. I liked the plot twists and the ending was really sweet.

Read if you want: adult mlm romance, historical fiction, planned thefts.

The Chosen and the Beautiful by Nghi Vo

It's been a long time since I read The Great Gatsby, so I vaguely recall what happened to compare with this book. Anyway, I liked that the protagonist is a Vietnamese girl and all her inner conflicts. The magic and its repercussions on the world were interesting, but I was not that interested in the story. Apart from Jordan, I thought the characters were annoying and didn't care for their conflicts. Also, the magic is sl fascinating but in was not a major focus.

Prince Lestat and the Realms of Atlantis by Anne Rice (x) (x)

So, I think I disliked it less than Prince Lestat because many things happen in this book. But I'm baffled by the new additions to the vampire lore. The consequences to the vampire as individuals are interesting, at least. I'm glad Lestat and Louis had a moment, in the beginning, to talk things through and are on good terms again.

Sasaki and Miyano Vol. 2 and Vol. 3 by Shou Harusono

The romance is super fluffy and lighthearted, and I needed something between some heavy reading. Super excited to read the next volume!

Read if you want: fluffy bl manga, school romance.

Crota by Owl Goingback

Scary! I haven't read a lot of horror about monsters but this one was super cool. It deals with indigenous legends and the cave hunting part was suffocating and scary! Just not a big fan of a disabled child getting cured at the end of the book, the kid is not the main character but it kind of put me off in the end.

Read if you want: horror with monsters, police procedure, indigenous legends.

As I Descended by Robin Talley (x)

This was pretty dark! The arc of corruption and madness was pretty well-done, and the characters made me want to read more and more. I read it for Disability Pride Month as the main character is disabled. I was glad that her arc isn't only about her disability while also mentioning her difficulties and people's prejudice.

Read if you want: spooky YA, queer retellings, Shakespeare retellings.

The Devotion of Suspect X by Keigo Higashino, tr. Alexander O. Smith

I'm not a big fan of police procedure, but this story is full of twists and turns that made me so curious about what would happen next! It's more of a mind game between the police and the killer than a thriller full of action, but it was an enjoyable read.

Read if you want: psychological thriller, police procedure.

Erotic Stories for Punjabi Widows By Balli Kaur Jaswal

Super fun and thought-provoking! It deals with stories bringing a community together, women finding a space to share stories, and also a mystery in the middle of everything. One of my favorites of the month!

Read if you want: fun stories, book club books, contemporary fiction.

Midnight's Children by Salman Rushdie (x) (x)

I took my time to read this book as it's a literary work, and it's very experimental. I liked the narration and the flow of the story. There're so many fascinating things about the story, the magic, the culture, India's history, and many others things. However, it's a long book. I was a bit tired at the end, but still, a great read.

Read if you want: literary and experimental fiction, magical realism.

The Other Black Girl by Zakiya Dalila Harris

The pacing of this thriller was slow, but I was interested in the diversity drama in Nella's work, so I was not bothered at first. But most of the main events happen right at the end, and the known villain does a "villain explaining their plan" that was a bit cartoonish. Also, the villain was only a part in the big scheme, and we don't get answers about this big thing happening. Still, there're some thought-provoking topics in this book, and the more "fantasy" aspect of it was super spooky.

Read if you want: slow-paced thrillers, psychological thrillers.

Ariel by Sylvia Plath (x)

I want to read more poetry, so I chose this one from the library. I enjoyed some poems and the images the writer created, but most of them fell flat for me.

Rereads:

Reborn! Vol 1 by Akira Amano, Frances E. Wall (translator)

Livros disponíveis em Português:

Links para os meus reviews no skook!

Baú de Sonhos Impossíveis de Filipe Bedendo (x)

De Repente Adolescente de vários autores (x) (x)

A Botija do Fantasma de Pablo Praxedes (x)

And feel free to talk to me about the books of this list :)

Read in: Feb | Mar | Apr | May | June |

☆Book Photography ☆ Storygraph ☆ Scribd ☆

#booklr #monthly wrap-up #mine: original posts #the refuge of books

[i-did]

hi hello i couldn't sleep last night so i was scrolling thru all ur asks and stuff and ur opinions and analyses are so interesting!!! and then afterwards i was thinking about what u were saying about mlm smut and i'd also been thinking about such things a little bit recently bc like.....at a certain point it becomes quite clear that the vast majority of smut-writing is just imitation. like there's the sex noise verb list and all and the whole general mechanics of the sex and those things just .... replicate over and over. and the whole thing w people writing mlm vs wlw smut regardless of their own sexual orientation..... like i feel like a big part of that is just a self-perpetuating thing. like if u have not had sex and u r getting all ur (pleasure-related) sex ed from fandom (even if u do watch porn, that doesn't rlly tell u how to describe stuff? idk) regardless of What fandom , the majority is going to be mlm smut. which is itself majority imitation of other mlm smut, imitating and imitating back to whoever knows what the first smut fanfic was etc. there's just way More to mimic than there is on the women side of things. which then becomes a self-perpetuating thing, bc the mimicry continues and generates more and more. and---if there are fundamental misunderstandings of anatomy involved---those self-perpetuate as well. and maybe even exaggerate. and yeah. does this all make sense? idk i was just thinking about it. like all the stereotypes and stuff continue bc writers are getting their inspo from other writers rather than their own brains. or something. idk!!!!! it's just all... divorced from reality? bc words. or something!! i hope u get what i'm trying to say. just thoughts i've been thinking. anyway i think ur thoughts are cool. and ur writing. ok bye have a good day!!

Okay yeah this is kinda messy but hope u see this, uhh yeah I think you're right about the echo chamber effect fr about stuff. I think it's a mix of projecting too sometimes. talk more under the cut and also link to a video essay since I love video essays.

Here’s a video that sort of touches on this topic: 

“Gay fanfiction” by Sarah Z. (has CC)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H8E_C00dKwI

This video begins to talk about fetishization at the end, but also… not really. The words “gay fanfiction” is used as a catchall, when really gay fanfiction is largely mlm written by non-mlm.

Fandom is a largely women's space dominated by the female gaze in a media industry world that is dominated by men and the male gaze. I'm really glad women have this space to explore creativity and queerness, and I don't expect the female gaze to go away, but I am still ultimately bummed out I can’t read most fanfic or interact with most fandom spaces without having fetishization in my face. 

So about 80% of fandom is women, and most of those women aren't straight, but 90% of those women prefer mlm ships. Why don’t they prefer wlw ships? Well definitely part of it is the fact that queerbaiting is centered around white straight men, and then there is also the fact that women tend not to be written as well charcter wise. But the fact still remains that you get jerjean getting priority over Layla and Alvarez who are in canon just as much and are a canon wlw couple who actually interact as well as Alvarez could likely be a woc because of her Hispanic last name. Korasami doesn’t get nearly as much hype as zuko and saka, despite the fact that they are 2 fully dimensional characters who canonly kiss and hold hands, something the creators fought for and ended up having to sacrifice another reboot for. 

I do believe the fandom echo-chamber is largely responsible for… a lot of things, like you're saying. But what's interesting is that the complaints I've heard about visual porn from non mlm in the fandom space is that they can’t get off to it because its for the male gaze and misogynistic usually. But they also don't seem to notice how the mlm smut circles has the female gaze and is also… almost always mlm. If it was a pure anatomical not knowing thing, I get that, but I also think that leads to the question of “then why the male body for porn, and not your own? The one you know and are familiar with?” 

I know some people want to get outside of their own body for porn and don’t want to think of their own anatomy at all, but overall I'm still uncomfortable. If an anglo said “well I watch porn of only Mexicans so I don't self insert” I'm gonna be like … hhhh in a similar way. I understand people “like what they like” but I wish they also noticed said patterns in the first place. I understand the t4t tumblr porn circle, and how it's different from cis people who only watch trans porn. 

I actually wished that instead of fandom focusing on mlm ships where some asshole guy hits on bottom troupe charcter for top troupe character to save, was instead… a wlw character experiencing said shitty getting hit on and other wlw swooping in. what's interesting is fandom writes a lot about misogynistic experiences without often realizing it. Ive read fanfic where guys get called sluts for sleeping with people or called bitch for speaking their mind, these arent things men usually experience, but rather women. Fandom has a lot of internalized misogyny and also queerphobia imo. Women characters often get pushed to the sidelines and men become the canvas for female fans to project onto. 

There is this natural inclination to mlm. When people are talking about “gay shipping” or “gay books” or “gay feels” or even just “gay” mlm is what’s largely in mind. I honestly am kinda saddened by this because if gay fanfiction was really solely about writing more to feel represented, then you would see a lot of bi and ace and lesbian rep, but this isn't the case. Queer women are seriously underrepresented, and I want to hear their stories and read them in fanfiction as well as published. 50% of lgbt literature is mlm, and of that its largely written by women. Becky Albertalli, Rainbow Rowell, Maggie Stiefvater, are the YA big names and are all women writing mlm. Red white and royal blue is written by Casey McQuiston and Captive prince (which is not YA) is written by C. S. Pacat, who is non-binary, but is also TME and not mlm. These are all the big names in mlm lit, behind them is some gay men, but honestly their stories aren't preferred, they're not the right “flavor” for the consumers usually, who are largely women. In general YA consumers and authors are women, but I wish that they… just wrote about women too. I think there is a certain… snowball effect to the overrepresentation of mlm representing the whole LGBT community that leads to fetishization, as well as misogyny playing a factor in: less women characters being written well to write fanfic on, when they are written well they're taken less seriously or the audience struggles to relate to them, they're less marketable then men. 

Idk I never feel “seen” or “represented” by any of the books above, which don't address boyhood and manhood and queerness intersecting really, and AFTG doesn’t either. I relate to AFTG as a trauma victim who has experienced a lot of what many of the characters go through and have gone through in the EC as well as them just overall being very well written characters, but I don't relate to it as a mlm really. I've never seen like.. gay voice or being straight passing or femphobia or how boyhood can be affected from a young age by those around you sensing you're ‘other’ or if you didn't experience this you feel outside the mlm community. Let alone sub cultures like bear and leather and pup, at most you see the word “he's such a twink” in fandom which... i fr hate non mlm using that word because it's usually used to replace the f-slur essentially, used derogatorily or to call him “such a bottom” and stuff like that. It’s like a joke or an insult.

Long story short, idk mang this was a ramble and I think I'm coning down with something. I wanna see more queer women rep and women authors writing about being a queer woman too. I think it's a complex web of fetishization and a bit of forbidden love yaoi culture (or it used to be in the BOYXBOY days) as well as misogyny on an industry level, creator level, as well as reader/consumer and fandom level. I don’t think it’s inherently wrong to explore other peoples stories and what we read has to be segregated, “only mlm are allowed to read and write mlm, only wlw are allowed to read and write wlw,” but I also think author’s intent and audience and background is telling, as well as overall statistics. Like about an hour ago I was looking for cookbooks in spanish or in english, and I was looking for some mexican food cook books, but I had to look for them using words in spanish because otherwise what came up was a bunch of “fiesta party, easy as uno dos tres authentic cooking!” and I was like… hm. Since I could tell they were marketing to anglos. (also the author’s last names were like michelle smith, james cooper, and this could be for a variety of reasons, but I trust Hispanic names more tbh and deadass would look at the authors pictures and if they had other books in Spanish or what their specialties were.)

anyways. not sure how to end this. uhm if anyone has any book recs (my to read list is like 500 books tho no joke) preferably not YA white mlm written by a white lady, hopefully queer women written by queer woman, LMK, I need more wlw and queer women stories on my list. I have a decent amount but always looking for more. I kinda wanna link my goodreads or my storygraph but I also don't want to get doxxed and it has my legal name on it so.

Also, I'm dyslexic and using spell check but if there's like some wild typos my b.

#ask #fandom politics #fandom culture #fandom psychology #mailob

[grimmons]

Now that it's said, done, and over, I'm extremely satisfied with the ending that we got for the M9. I know people who are distressed and upset and uncomfortable with the ending that Essek and Caleb got, but to me? It reads like people just. Don't understand how intimate these characters are with each other.

My thoughts will be under the cut and finished off in tags. It's a long one, boys.

cws and tws // critical role spoilers for ep 141, shadowgast mentions, queerbaiting references, mentions of abuse (multiple kinds) and trauma.

The casual intimacy in and out of fights, declarations of devotion, wanting to spend most of Caleb's lifetime with Essek...

Essek willing to drop the idea of his lifelong dream, because he had met Caleb, and Caleb changed him for the better.

Caleb sharing a very, very personal and horrible and traumatizing memory, and a dream that he's wanted for years, to undo his mistakes, to save them. Essek immediately offering his help and willingness for assistance, because even though he refuses the ability to time travel for both consequences unknown, and the ability to be with Caleb in the now, he would drop anything to allow his friend, his student, his partner, to have a happy and fufilling life.

Caleb denying the offer in a silence, and disintegrating everything, the only thing that could have offered him a comfort of the past, to show that he's moved forwards, and Essek acknowledging it quietly.

The big Shadowgast moments? They're THERE. Not everyone is as loud with their intimacy and affection and care and love. Not every couple is for the big kisses, the loud confessions, declarations. Both Caleb and Essek are guarded, careful individuals.

And I know, I know, the friendship word. It's horrible, it's pride month, Liam keeps cutting off mlm representation with his characters, it's baiting, whatever. Say what you will say. But friendship does not, and has never, been an exclusive descriptor.

My wife might be one of the best friends I've ever had. I refer to her as my wife, but also my friend, and we may be life partners, but that doesn't stop me from trusting her with my life as both. And trust me, we ARE the loud romantic types.

Caleb has been through worlds of trauma and hurt, through friends, love, and sex alike. We all know this.

Essek is filled with paranoia and fear, any wrong move and he's on the chopping block where Trent could have been.

Caleb is a teacher at Soltryce Academy, a man offered a spot on the Assembly, a counsellor of a child and a hero as part of the Mighty Nein.

Essek is a war criminal, who is wanted for many crimes, known for betrayal of the Dynasty, and I can only imagine much worse.

Do you think Essek, so willing to sacrifice himself, so willing to drop everything for Caleb, would want to incriminate that name by his presence? Speak up? Say something?

Caleb has been the one to initiate almost every moment between them. The forehead kisses, touches, cheek kiss. All of that was Caleb. Essek never acts upon impulse regarding Caleb unless it is DIRE, and he feels active danger coming to harm Widogast.

Essek would know. Run all of the possible outcomes through his head. That was his entire life's work, remember? The endless possibilities? He would have run every bad ending over and over, Caleb being hurt, being hunted, blamed, defamed, ruined. Because of him. Being near him. Why would he ruin this for Caleb? He has a lifespan far, far shorter than Essek. Maybe 70 or so years left, which feels like but a speck to that of an elf. Why would he want Caleb to suffer MORE, in the short amount of time he has left with him?

He wouldn't!

But I don't think Caleb would agree either. He wouldn't give up, this was discussed too. He doesn't admit defeat easily. He would keep trying, I think. Stay with him. And there would be an unspoken love between them, I think. Knowing, acknowledging, hurting. Knowing that being together means absolute hell for the two of them, with Essek hiding, and Caleb's life expanding. Essek has too many personas at risk, and Caleb has a future ahead of him. Essek has an eternity, to Caleb.

And I know, a spell could have fixed it all. Essek could have changed himself to fit better with Caleb. He would get a free pass. But that's not the point! Essek wants to be able to live with his sins and free himself at his own pace. Caleb would have been willing, but they had a whole discussion about how they wouldn't change anything - past or future. About moving forward. Essek wouldn't just.. take a free pass out. Not after that.

I think it was fitting for them. Life partners, unspoken but known. Friends. Romantically or not, they loved each other in some way, made for each other. Saved each other, literally and metaphorically. Maybe they tried, but it wasn't meant to be.

Romance is... nice. Vagueness is horrid, and has a deep history of discomfort in the LGBT community. Especially when in line with being "friends." But in my opinion, there's no hiding that Essek and Caleb were intimate, and cared deeply for each other. They were by no means just friends. And I think both Liam and Matt know that, and I think they chose the perfect way to end it. I respect them and it.

And hey, even if they never became romantic, platonic relationships are important! Queerplatonic ones, too! It may not be the perfect wizard romance we wanted, or proper representation to those (rightfully, I feel) upset, but it doesn't make that form of love any less real or valid. I say this as an mlm person who desires representation of myself. I know I don't speak for us all, but my personal view is this.

We may be angry, or upset, or confused, or in grief. Representation does matter, and I completely agree! But ultimately, it is not our story to write, our characters to bend, or anything more. We can't will Liam into doing something he thinks does not fit the moment or character. Parasocial relationships need to meet a stopping point, for the player and the character.

And remember, most of Caleb's love life is... actually revealed by Liam out of game! The Jester crush, his attraction to Essek at all, Blumentrio. Caleb is just not open about it.

And to that, I say a final note of thank you, to the Mighty Nein. Long may you all reign. Don't forget to love each other.

#critical role spoilers #critrole spoilers #cr spoilers #maybe ill get hate for this #but it needed to be said #i think. #caleb and essek are wonderful and intricate and DELICIOUS characters #they are not easily defined by simple words of romance! #and hey #actions speak louder than words #and different love languages exist #i know. i know its so much better to have affirmation of canon romance #in words. in written clarification. #but the ultimate truth is that its never quite that simple. #real romance does not always work in the way of labels and clean guidelines and. #clear cut corners. #love is messy! love is weird and scary and often times hard to explain.. #traumatized people with mental health issues have struggles. caleb is... neurodivergent coded. #i dont expect people to fully agree with me but i think its important to understand #i wanted shadowgast to be canon #i cried and yelled at the screen when liam said friends #i wanted them so bad. i wanted this win. #but after letting the scenes run and thinking deeply #i think its best this way. #and who knows! maybe liam will say something #its not up to us! caleb is not ours. #he is liams character and none of us know better about what caleb wants or needs. #that is the most important part to remember #anyways thats all. whew. time to go pass tf out #long post

[im-the-punk-who]

Hi! I’m new to the fandom and I’m simply curious (not trying to start a feud or anything), why don’t you like Steinberg?

Hello dear anon! And welcome to the fandom! 

Oof. That’s a question. xD 

I’m going to try and stay as uh. neutral as possible. Because I’ve already written the post I know I failed but, the intent in answering this is also not to start a feud or hurt anyone’s feelings. 

Okay, so I got fairly negative in this chilis tonight, so I want to start by saying that even in light of the opinions I’m about to express, Black Sails is one of, if not my number one, favorite TV shows of all time. Certainly in recent memory - I’ve been hyperfixating on this show for 18 months with no sign of stopping, and I have a tremendous amount of respect for everyone who worked on the show - even Steinberg. (The one exclusion is Michael Bay, he can go twist.)

AND I think Stienberg is an incredibly talented writer. Black Sails is one of my favorite shows because it does such a wonderful job of weaving stories, creating characters, and melding things in a way that is both unexpected and makes sense narratively. I have changed as a person because of the show, and they will have to pry James McGraw and Thomas Hamilton from my cold dead knives-attached-to-them hands. None of what I’m going to say is meant to detract from that.

I will also say that a lot of these issues are not particular to Steinberg and are in fact a systemic problem with American TV + Film. And I’m not leaving Robert Levine out of my criticism, it’s just that Steinberg had the biggest hand in the pot(he wrote a full half the episodes) and a lot of what I’ve heard as far as talking about the show comes from Steinberg. So, he gets the brunt. But it isn’t that I think Steinberg was the only problematic element of the show. 

Also, these are all my opinions and are colored by how I interact with my fandoms. I am not only a fandom veteran, but I work and pretty much live in the entertainment industry. I work in indie film and theatre and am surrounded by artists and creators of all walks of life, like, constantly. I know what is possible, and when I see something that can be improved, I want to note it because it is important to me to always be striving forward. Like Miranda says about Thomas, this isn’t out of malice, or out of hate. It’s because I genuinely love this show, and I love entertainment as a whole, and I think in order to get to a better, more inclusive industry we have to have hard conversations and look critically at the media we consume, and it is frustrating to me to time and again see the same faces in the room. 

But if that isn’t your cuppa, that’s fine! Fandom isn’t meant to be stressful and if all you want to do is watch a show about gay pirates that is your tomato and I applaud you. Have at it you funky motherfucker.

OH! One more. At some point I’m going to talk about Silverflint. When I do, it is NOT meant as a ‘you shouldn’t/cant ship this’ or ‘this pairing is bad’ or any negative attack on the people who ship that pairing. My criticisms in this post are exclusively about what it means for Steinberg as a writer and Black Sails’ representation of gay and mlm men. While it’s not my cuppa, this is a sail your own ship blog. 

OKAY! SO! 

My main criticisms of Steinberg & Co boil down to:

The homozygosity of the writers and directors shows a complete lack of desire to include marginalized people in the writing of a show that is about them. Which leads to:

The centering of white men while choosing a historical setting and time period that was in fact dominated by people of color and specifically a black woman, 

The gratuitous inclusion of violence against women, particularly sexual violence, and again, that the female characters are often sidelined for the central male characters. 

SO.

Black Sails is a show centered around queer, female, and black leads, and yet there were only two non white-male directors (one bi-racial man and one white woman) and only 7 female writers - one of whom was Latina. The entire rest of the major creative staff was white men. I’m not going to comment on sexualities but none of the writers or directors are out as queer according to a quick google search. 

Let me reiterate the important bit there. 

In Black Sails, where the last two seasons specifically feature around a real, actually-happened-in-history event that shaped black history in the Caribbean, there was not a single black writer on the entire show. 

This is the main difference between inclusion for inclusion’s sake, and actually centering marginalized voices. Black Sails has a ton of gay, POC, and female rep in front of the camera but practically zero representation behind it, which leads to storylines and implications that Steinberg and his writers, as white men, simply would never realize.

It’s like why Silver and Miranda never realized the true reasons James was waging war on England. They just did not have the life experiences to realize they were missing a piece of the puzzle, and so they filled in their own without even realizing they’d done so. 

Because no one in the room of Black Sails was a part of these marginalized identities, nuances get lost or mistranslated, motivations get muddled through a white man’s gaze(or a straight person’s) and implications that someone within those communities might think is obvious won’t even come up.

And again, because there were no writers or directors of color in the last two seasons (the biracial man directed episodes 2x02 and 2x04 - WHICH MAKES SENSE IMO) the entirety of the historical lore that the show bases itself on in its latter half is filtered through a white man’s lens. And so there is no discussion of how changing something changes the meaning, how leaving someone out or changing their role to be more minor might affect people for whom that is their heritage. How the entire story they’re telling might change with one simple exclusion or addition.

So, how does this relate directly to Steinberg, you ask? Well, simply, because it was his show. 

Steinberg(and Levine) were involved in every major decision about the show, from its conception, to the script, to choosing the writers and directors. They chose how they wanted the show to look, to think, what stories to tell and how they wanted to tell them. Their decisions(and the biases that formed those decisions) are woven into the show.

And look. I don’t for a second believe any of this was willful or malicious. I don’t think that John Steinberg and Robert Levine sat down one day and said ‘you know what would make the gays really angry? If we locked the only two canonically gay men up in a prison camp.’

But the decisions that were made in the show were based in ignorance in a way that shows more than just simple negligence or laziness(especially given the attention to detail in everything else). The things they leave out or change in the Maroon War plotline for instance are not small details easily missed. They are big, giant waving flags. They are things that are irreplaceable to still have the same events and stories and tell them respectfully. 

It shows an insane amount of privilege to, for instance, write a show airing during a time when the Black Lives Matter movement was at the forefront of the American conscience, include black characters and black storylines, and yet not include a single black voice on their creative team. 

In a show that centers a gay man’s love and his journey in attempting to process the horrible things done to him and his lover because of it, we are given just forty minutes of the entire show dedicated to their relationship - and just fifteen of those minutes actually feature the lover! 

(Relatedly, the entirety of the gay romantic rep is two kisses, and a forehead touch. That’s the entirety of your gay intimacy representation. And yet there are in the first two seasons alone - because that’s all I’ve clocked so far - something like twenty seven minutes of scenes involving a naked or half naked woman. Five minutes of that is explicitly wlw sex.

Again, I just want to reiterate this because it’s important in recognizing bias. 

There is fully twice as much female nudity in the first two seasons, as the entirety of the time the two gay characters have together on screen. )

Steinberg is a perfect example of how a lack of understanding why the diversity you are representing is important, matters. I dislike Steinberg because he, just like every other straight white cis man I have known, profited off of marginalized voices without including them or creating with them in mind.

Art does not exist in a vacuum. You cannot create something - especially something as back breakingly, intensely a labor of love as Black Sails - without putting several pieces of yourself into it. But those pieces color your narrative. They will expose things about you that you don’t even realize. And it’s in these places we are weakest, and why a diverse group of writers with a diverse group of experiences can help a piece be stronger. But for whatever reason, John Steinberg thought that he could make art with only people who looked and thought and experienced like him. 

The lack of representation behind the camera in Black Sails was evident in front of it and yet Steinberg is out here getting to pretend like he created the most inclusive groundbreaking show that ever existed. It is important to me, personally, to acknowledge that. And that it kind of makes my skin crawl in the way all media made by straight white (cis)men makes my skin crawl. I wish I didn’t have to feel that way about my favorite tv show just because it was created by a man of privilege, but here we are.

SO. I hope that helped? Feel free to take what you want and leave what you don’t! 

Below the cut is a more in depth look at things that I think show what I’m talking about, but that up there ^^ is the gist. <3 |D

SURPRISE!

The Maroons and the Maroon War

So the first thing I want to point out is that the Maroon War was a real thing that happened. It lasted ten years, and resulted in the most substantial victory the Maroons ever achieved against the British. Not only that, there was in fact a KICKIN’ badass female leader of the maroons named Queen Nanny, who is to this day honored as a national hero in Jamaica. While they weren’t able to drive the British out, the outcome of this war led to a mostly self-governing Maroon population in Jamaica from the mid 1700s on. This was a long term fight that had a very tangible and real outcome, even if it didn’t end in the destruction of colonialism. 

And what is this war turned into in Black Sails? A white ‘madman’s revenge’  that is doomed to failure after six months.

That, my dear pirates, is a problem for me. (And those familiar with my brand of spiceyness know that I do not ascribe to the ‘Flint is a Madman’ trope, but that IS what Steinberg ascribes to, what he seems to have written the show thinking.) 

There was no narrative reason to include the Maroon War in the narrative of Black Sails. The Maroon War didn’t happen until a decade after the Golden Age of Piracy, and aside from Silver’s wife being a black woman there is no mention of Silver ever having contact with them. To me, this feels like the choice of a showrunner who found a cool historical event and saw a chance to up the stakes of their white male heroes while getting in some sweet sweet POC rep. 

Except that they then took the major events of the Maroon War and gave them to their white characters, Flint and Silver. 

Here’s the thing. If you’re going to take a piece of culturally important history and use it for your show, you NEED to have sensitivity writers. You need to have people who are at least familiar with those events and who care about them to do them justice. Have an expert come in and read your script or go over your ideas. Or just like. Hire a black writer. Hire ONE black writer. As a treat.

The important Maroon figures, Nanny, Cudjoe, and Quao, all get sidelined or ‘sexified’ and then used as plot points for the white characters. Nanny gets split into two women - the older mother queen and Madi, the young naive warbent visionary. Quao(Mr. Scott is the closest, or Kofi possibly) gets killed off because the writers realized they didn’t exactly have a place for him in their writing. Cudjoe(Julius) gets a few scenes and one good speech but his entire role in the war gets given to Silver. And THEN. That sexy Queen Madi figure gets used as emotional bait for Silver and then has to learn he has betrayed her and destroyed the hope and freedom she had wanted to bring to her people. 

Gross, pirates. Gross.

Anne Bonny/Max/Mary Read - a heads up, this section includes a semi in-depth discussion of both Max and Anne’s sexual assaults. If that bothers you, the paragraphs talking about that begin with a ***

COOL NOW LET’S TALK ABOUT LESBIANS. Words my 20 year old self would never have imagined coming out of my mouth. 

Specifically, I want to talk about Max, and Anne, and their backstories both involving extreme sexual trauma at the hands of men. And then Mary Read and the once again sexification of female characters.

(Actually while I’m here another criticism I have of Steinberg is that his writing does not seem to recognize how queer people existed in the past - again, likely because he didn’t have any gay historians to be like ‘actually buddy that doesn’t make sense also why is Anne not dressing as a man? If you want to fuck with anything and insert modern day terminology and ideas into this show, make her non binary and REALLY piss off the hetties.’)

(This same ficitonal gay dramaturg who is definitely not me has also questioned John Steinberg repeatedly about where Mary Read is, unsatisfied with the answer ‘well we wanted her to be hot so we made her a sex worker and then had Anne have to rescue her but then we realized it would be weird not to include her actual character so we gave her a five second cameo at the very end of the series and also made her like 13.’)

Anyway! So my main point in bringing up Anne and Max is the sexual trauma they are exposed to in the show, particularly being that they are the two primary wlw in the show, who Steinberg has said he views as being completely gay, and what THAT whole unexamined idea looks like. 

***Max. My dear Max. There was literally no reason to have her be repeatedly r*ped(and for the love of god there was even less reason to make it that gratuitous and graphic). Max being assaulted like that did not add anything to the gravity of Eleanor’s betrayal. The traumatic event was being tossed aside by Eleanor, and that could have been just as emotionally damaging without the sexual assault. And the only reason for her to be continually assaulted was to bring her and Anne together. 

***The reason imo that Max’s r*pe plot was added was because it was the only thing these white straight men could come up with that felt emotionally damaging enough to them. The act of betrayal itself wasn’t enough, the act of being thrown away, of having a lover put your life in danger because of her own ambitions wasn’t enough, they needed her to be r*ped to really drive home the point. 

***Anne, on the other hand, is never shown being sexually abused, but we are given an explicit account of her own traumatic history and how Jack saved her from this vile beast who was passing her around to his friends.

But here’s the thing pirates - that never happened. According to every account we have of Anne Bonny, she chose her husband, and married him against her father’s wishes. They were probably relatively happy until her husband started being a pirate spy and Anne started cheating on him with Jack. 

And yes, when they were found out. Her husband had her beat. That’s not fucking cool, and if they really wanted to go the damsel in distress route they still could have had Jack ‘save’ her from that. But at no point was she sexually abused by her husband(at least not in any accounts I’ve read.) 

You know who did likely sexually abuse her or at least manipulate her and Mary for his own benefit? If you guessed our Rat man Jack Rackham, you would be correct, because when he found out about Mary and Anne’s (supposed, but probably real) relationship, it’s implied he extorted both of them into fucking him to keep their secret from the crew. 

The addition of sexual abuse to Anne’s past isn’t done to be true to her character and was in fact explicitly untrue. Now of course I don’t know the reasons why they chose to do this, but I can guess. Just as with Max, the most traumatic thing a male writer can think of for a female character is for them to be sexually abused.

And the most disturbing part of this to me? The parallels it has to the real world of why straight men think lesbians exist. These characters who would be called man haters in present day are given these incredibly traumatic man-centered histories. It brings up something very uncomfortable in me about particularly wlw sexuality being viewed as a reaction to trauma at the hands of men. It’s just gross, I dont like it, and honestly there is no fucking excuse for it besides a room full of white straight men writing this bullshit. A room that Steinberg chose, because they fit his ideas.

In Fact heck, the women of Black Sails in general

***I honestly struggle to think of a single female character who I think was treated fairly in Black Sails. Miranda and Eleanor are killed for taking sides and not understanding their partners, Madi is betrayed in the worst way possible, Max is given a pseudo empowering ending but has that fucking terrible start. Idelle ends off fairly well, but tied to a man she may or may not have any actual feelings for, in what is essentially a political marriage. And Anne has her entire identity tied to a man who will be dead in two years as she is robbed of any agency whatsoever without him. (Oh, and the whole r*pe thing. And also her support for Max’s r*pe or death until she started having fee-fees. Who wrote this stuff. >_>)

Even though the characterization of each and every one of these women is PHENOMENAL - and again I will repeat that I absolutely LOVE these characters as they exist in a vacuum. I think they are well rounded, real, feeling people given motivations and drives and FEELINGS and they SHOW THEIR ANGER and i LOVE THEM. 

But the show punishes them for it. Miranda is essentially fridged to move Flint’s storyline along, and to make room for Silver. Eleanor is killed for the emotional damage it will cause Rogers. Madi is placed at the center of a conflict she explicitly says she is willing to die for and then not only is her entire cause taken from her, but when she tells Silver to fuck off he - in possibly the most predictable white man move ever - says ‘no i will stay until you change your mind. I will never leave you. I don’t care about your choice in this matter, I will wait forever for you. I’m your biggest fan. I’ll follow you until you love me. papa, - paparazzi.’ 

And I touched on this before, but I want to talk in more detail about what is possibly my hottest take to date, the sexification of Mary Read and Queen Nanny, as they are presented in the show. 

Max is to Anne what Mary Read is, historically. She is the lover that Jack Rackham discovers with Anne, and then he joins them in their bed. They form a triumvirate that upholds Jack at the expense of the women. But for some reason, Steinberg didn’t want to just include Mary Read as an actual character. For some reason he needed to make Anne’s love interest a sex worker who was in need of saving (and who, coincidentally, we never see working the brothel after she becomes lovers with Anne, because she is now a madam. :) Gross.)

And Madi. My dear sweet fucking Madi who didn’t fucking deserve any of this bullshit send tweet. 

So, historically, Queen Nanny was the Queen, spiritual advisor, and the military tactician of the Windward Maroons. She would have filled both Madi and the Queen’s character roles(and Flint’s, but who’s counting. A BLACK GAY LEAD? Inconceivable. I digress.) But, I guess, because they were wishy-washing with Silver’s sexuality or felt they needed to give him a female love interest because of Treasure Island, or because they were leaning a bit too hard into the gay shit and needed to backpedal, they took Queen Nanny and split her into a character who is for all intents and purposes powerless in the war and Madi, who is young and naive and does not have any real world experience outside of the Maroon camp.

Because that’s sexy, or something. They could have had the Maroon Queen be a fucking badass lady who works and fights alongside Flint and Silver and one ups them and teaches them shit and has her own ideas about where the British can stick it, but instead they made her into the perfect caricature of a female monarch, letting the big strong men handle the dirty work or something. Because white male power fantasies. 

Just let women be powerful and not nubile and let them have character arcs over fucking thirty and let them be CENTERED in their own. fucking. narratives. 

God damnit Steinberg.

James Flint, mlm extraordinaire

Oh, my love. My most amazing child. The light of my life. My purest cinnamon roll. 

~~And now we’ve come to the dreaded Silverflint criticism part of our programming. Please please know and remember this isn’t a criticism of people who ship Silverflint. As I said up top, Your Tomato Is Not My Tomato and that’s cool. Please don’t take this next part as an attack on Silverflint as a fandom ship.~~

My criticism of Steinberg as it relates to Flint is related to:

What a romantic/sexual relationship with Silver being the basis of the tension and plot means for Flint in particular as a gay or mostly mlm man. 

Refusing to confirm Thomas and James being alive at the end and honestly the whole finale in general but like I’ll try and focus.

The major problem I have with Silver and Flint being coded as in love with each other is the implications there in terms of gay men’s relationships to other men. 

From every corner, men are inundated with the idea that any close relationship between them must be gay. That intimacy cannot exist unless there are sexual feelings involved. That a relationship cannot be close, deep and soul shattering and life altering, unless one guy secretly(or not so secretly) wants to bone the other dude. That two men cannot value each other as partners or friends or truly know each other unless they are gay.

Seeing both of the meaningful relationships Flint forms with other men be sexually coded feels a bit the same way as Anne and Max’s sexual assault plotlines does vis-a-vis being wlw. (Even with Gates, Flint never spoke about Thomas or his plans - Silver is absolutely the closest person to Flint besides Thomas and Miranda.) And this is just as true for Silver. Having both Flint and Madi - the two people he trusts - both be people he’s in love with also just feels. I don’t know. 

It feels like a confusion between male intimacy and male love that is so so familiar to me as a gay man I could choke on it. Where they wanted these men to have a deep and really lasting connection, but could only figure out how to do it if they were in love. Friendship wouldn’t have been enough - only romantic and sexual love is enough for the gay man(or men, at all).

Just because it isn’t queerbaiting doesn’t mean it’s good rep, and I would have liked to see truly deep male friendships that did not center on sexual attraction - particularly for Flint as a confirmed mlm(and Silver too, if you’re counting him. The same arguments for why I dislike Flint being paired with Silver are also true in the reverse.) 

Even if both Flint and Silver were confirmed mlm I still would have LOVED to see a platonic relationship between them. In fact I would have loved that EVEN MORE. Men! Who fuck men! Not needing to fuck each other to be important to one another! Who made this. Very delicious. 

But because there weren’t any queer writers on the show, writers who understand this kind of struggle that gay and mlm men face, they thought ‘oh, let’s also have them be in love with each other. More gay rep is better gay rep, right?’ False. THOUGHTFUL gay rep is better gay rep.

Okay and here’s my last thing. The fact that Steinberg refuses to say whether or not the explicitly mlm men are alive at the end of the show - that the words he specifically uses are ‘up for interpretation’ is. Fuck, it’s gross, okay? It’s fucking gross. 

I have been around enough men, enough people in power, enough people with leverage who also know how to play the field, to know that when someone wants a group’s support but does not agree with them, their go to phrasing is that it is ‘up for debate’ or ‘up for interpretation.’

Say the gays are alive. Steinberg refusing to acknowledge the reality of the ending of his show to maintain his own sense of artistic integrity is what, honestly, really sets me off about him and I don’t care if this is a nuanced take.

Like yes, death of the author. I honestly don’t care if he thinks they’re dead or alive. What I care about is that he thinks he can get away with being clever and leaning hard into a story is true/untrue’ - doesn’t realize what the implications of that are, and didn’t when he was writing, and didn’t have anyone else in the room who would think about it either. 

ANYWAY. So this is....my long drawn out explanation for why I do not like Steinberg. Uhhhhh tune in next week for more of my totally unpopular opinions!

#good....fucking lord #i am so sorry #how many opinions can milo fit in one post #i mean i have more but yknow lmao #black sails #behind the black sails #milos black sails meta #long posts #my increasingly devoted attempts to find tumblrs word limit #Anonymous #john steinberg #js critical but the js is jon steinberg

[theunconcernedembalmer]

what’s the issue with elisop? is it just bc you hc aesop as ace? im so concerned by seeing ppl adamantly opposed to mlm/wlw ships but im also genuinely curious about why you dislike it and other lgbt ships so much lol

hmm. that is a strong accusation, n i find it just a bit odd. are you new here? or perhaps you are taking personal offense at my dislike towards a favourite ship of yours and using the lgbt argument as moral high ground?

whatever the case may be, i thank you for asking. if u r truly looking for an answer, its below the cut n it is very very long. mind u these are all my personal opinions n i am in no way policing how others enjoy ships. just in case this wasnt clear; i dont wish to start discourse on this blog, especially since my takes are probably... unpopular.

firstly i would like to address the “disliking lgbt ships” bit, because this has very strong implications in itself. i have nothing against lgbt ships. i enjoy them, even. if the two characters have chemistry between each other, i ship it. however, the moment characterization is broken for the sake of romance, i lose interest. this is generally my stance on ships in general, n this applies for both straight n lgbt ships. 

the ships themselves are fine. however, i do have issues with the ship dynamics, so ill let u in on that.

i want to touch on mlm ships in particular; i believe u are familiar with the top/bottom dynamic that is rampant in these kinds of ships? (i wont deny that this dynamic can be found in other types of ships, but for arguments sake i will be focusing on gay ships because i feel that this occurs more commonly here) its such a popular dynamic that is prone to stripping the personality from one if not both characters, only for them to be reduced to being dominant/submissive. for a character to be pigeonholed into a stereotypical category based on... preferred sexual positions? its just downright insulting, never mind the larger more problematic implications of it. top/bottom is not indicative of someones personality, by the way. flattening multi dimensional characters into these stereotypes is so so so insulting.

unfortunately this is The Most Popular portrayal of just about any gay ship around. ive seen it being used everywhere in so many fandoms n it just about becomes apparent to me that ppl come to stories looking for a Ship. not the stories, nor the characters, just a ship. while id like to say theres nothing wrong with that, keep in mind not everyone is just looking for 2 characters that look pretty next to each other. if i ship something, i see interesting n meaningful interactions between 2 characters, which is so often not the case once u bring in the top/bottom dynamic. why is it so popular? because somehow this is what ppl like from a gay ship n hence it sells. ppl want the drama, characterizations be damned. ppl want to see the big kiss that happens in the end, n maybe the sexy parts that come after. characterizations be damned.

so u can say im a little wary of gay ships when they cross my feed. hell, as a joseph aesop shipper i see this trope everywhere n im pretty disappointed as well. small tangent but i feel like this is the reason why zh0ngli n ch1lde is so popular in g3nshin. i try to see the appeal, i really do, but after a long while of analyzing their respective characters i dont think they have as much chemistry as ppl think they do. dont even get me started on how incredibly ooc they make either of these very interesting n unique characters in ship portrayals. all because of the top/bottom dynamic that ppl want to see. i say this for that particular ship, but this is pretty much the case for a lot of ships out there, n the latter part is painfully true even when the 2 characters do have potential between each other. ill say it again im disgusted by the blatant disrespect to the characterizations if all ppl ever want is 2 pretty puppets to mush lips together. cos thats what theyre essentially reduced to this way.

n its so obvious to see when an artist subscribes to this rhetoric, because u can so clearly see it in the way they draw their characters. the “top” generally has sharper features to go with their “dominating personality”, while the “bottom” has disturbingly softer, feminine, dare i say sometimes child like features “to submit”. n thats where the uwu soft gay trope comes from, i believe. which, in case u still dont know, i hate with a burning passion.

so again for ppl with impaired reading comprehension, im fine with ships, including lgbt ones, but the moment u break characterization for the sake of the ship, im not that okay with it. u want to do it for a short crack comic? fine. but if thats the only way ur portraying the 2 characters then im immediately wary of ur content. ill still look at it cos usually the art is really good, but im very very wary. so im not “adamantly opposed”, just very critical of how the ships are being portrayed. if other ppl want to enjoy their ships like that, sure. just dont expect me to join in on something i dont agree on.

.

now id like to address not shipping “because i hc aesop as ace”. for ppl who are new to the blog (hello there), im an ace in a romantic relationship, so thats definitely not the reason i dont ship elisop. its more of being in a relationship has largely shaped my views towards romance as a whole. even before i met my boyfriend, i hated the romance genre in stories n media. most of it comes off as incredibly forced, especially those love triangles they seem to love putting into teen novels. thats one reason why i stopped reading when i was younger, but i digress.

did i partake in shipping when i was younger? i did. for a gay ship too (if anyone really wants to know, its kurotsukki from haikyuu. at least this was one that i can remember, i was mostly working on my 20 odd ocs for the longest time). i also used to write little short romance ficlets that i never posted anywhere cos i hated (n still do hate) my writing. but writing romance when u dont have experience was really just a way of projecting n probably a way of coping for myself, not that i knew at that time. but after i actually started a relationship with my boyfriend (whom i love n cherish a lot thank u very much), i began to see how much all these have skewed my views towards romance n have actually done some harm to our relationship. the bullshit that the general media feeds u constantly doesnt help in the slightest either.

quick topic shift to elisop in particular (about time, right?). i already stated that i only ship characters if i sense chemistry between the two personalities, n if u have seen the part where i dont ship elisop then u must have seen how agonized i am over not being able to have a concrete personality for eli. that is the main problem i have with elisop: eli does not feel like a solid character to me. n that is a huge problem, because if he doesnt have any defining characteristics besides being mild n nice, then he can be whoever i want him to be. (i have done this in my exorcist comics, i will admit this. n the fact that i can just do that... it really does not sit well with me personally.)

n that is dangerous.

back to young me doing lil ship things. i think its also pretty safe to say when u really do ship 2 characters, chances are u kinda really relate very very hard to at least one of them. that very quickly can turn into projecting, n shipping therefore is not “exploring the relationship between 2 characters” n it becomes “my preferred dating simulator 101″. of course this isnt always the case, but at least it was for me, n subconsciously it might be for lots of ppl too. n since this is ur mental playground, u call the shots, n there is no consequences if u slightly (or even entirely) alter one or both personalities to fit ur desired narrative. n u wouldnt even notice or know, cos ur blind to ur own biasness.

we bring our perceived notions into real life, im sure u know that. so when ur partner does not become that perfect knight in shining armour, or when they get upset at things that u do (which is a very normal thing by the way), n u think (very subconsciously), That isnt what my otp would do, something is wrong here (nothing is wrong, actually its just ur skewed perception of a stable romantic relationship). why wouldnt ur otp do this? because u are both halves of ur otps, there is no hidden secrets between them (apart from the pining part but thats irrelevant), n again they have been altered to fit ur preferred narrative. 

a real relationship requires a lot of communication between parties, because newsflash, liking someone doesnt mean that u have to like every single thing they do, they will make mistakes n it will hurt u, n guess what, the reverse is also true. if u do go with absoutely anything that they would do with 0 objections whatsoever, ur not crushing on someone, ur idolizing them, n that power imbalance is detrimental to a relationship. these things are not obvious to ppl, especially when the whole climate is hell bent on getting into romantic relationships by a certain age or some bullshit. communication is key n is pretty much the only way to solve relationship issues, because the other person has a lot that u r not seeing n vice versa. as similar as 2 ppl can be, i doubt u can have 100% the same thoughts on all things. i dont make the rules.

so in ur mental playground u focus on the fluffy parts, maybe there is communication, but rarely is there any meaningful conflict. thats unrealistic, n if u bring that mindset to an actual relationship, thats not going to end well. i say meaningful conflict, because yes, generally u shouldnt have conflicts with ur significant other. but inevitably when ur with each other for long enough, u will realize that there are habits that u must change in order to be with the other person. habits that are harmful to the other person directly, or harmful habits towards yourself that indirectly harm the other person. these are meaningful in a sense that if left alone, it will manifest into larger problems that will harm u, the other person n the relationship as a whole. its meaningful to the relationship.

all these is made even worse if ur neurodivergent. maladaptive coping practices, self sabotaging behaviours, inherent disabilities. all these must be adjusted n addressed. im so incredibly thankful for my boyfriend for being incredibly patient with me when working all these out, n it has not been easy for me to work on myself n all my problems, n im still not done working on them. this aspect is often not explored in romance in general (or properly), n there is a very good chance i would have still been stuck in the unhealthy mindset of “this isnt like my otp, maybe we’re not meant to be”. because loving someone is a choice. no one is made for each other, it is a conscious choice made between 2 ppl to make things work. this is how arranged marriages work, i am told, n i do see the appeal, not that it actually does appeal to me culturally.

special mention to the kurotsukki ship, cos from there i found a very, very good fic that explored their relationship before n after getting together, n it actually showed aspects of this problem in the incredibly slow burn of (at that time) 20+ chapters. it was just one fic (n a very good one at that, i believe it was called Leviticus), but it had a lesson i never thought i needed to learn, n learn it i did, with a lot of help from my dear. 

this is also probably the reason why i dont really want to delve too much into romance now. i know its a lot of work, n everything (mostly) that the media feeds u is really false advertising, but ppl eat that shit up n so it remains one of the most popular genres to date. im just very wary that if i do start on a romantic story, i want to be able to show it in a way like that fic did, the truths of relationships, because i dont want to make something that sells, i want to make something that meaningful to me, if a little indulgent. n that also includes being very careful in how the respective characterizations will change in a relationship. almost too careful now that i think about it, but its not something that i mind. i was never one for romance from the start, n now im very careful about shipping because of what happened to me persoanlly.

okay enough about me, lets talk about aesop. in any au u put the character in, the essence of the character must remain despite the change in environment. so lets say we have ur typical modern au. dead mom, check. shitty mentor doing illegal stuff? also check. autistic boy with social anxiety? we’re good to go. all these have implications on aesop as a character, n while ppl are aware of this, again the way they go about portraying it can go, in my personal opinion, very wrong. ppl who immediately woobify aesop completely because he has autism annoy me. ppl who reduce him to uwu soft boi cos he has social anxiety do not know how the disorder really works n as someone who has that i hate it to the core. ppl who do all these for the sake of ship have lost my respect. its insulting.

remember the top/bottom dynamic? not that elisop is completely free from that (even if i dont know much about eli, to put him in either one of those stereotypes feels very insulting to his character. i wont even say anything about doing it to aesop its so upsetting), but its not entirely made up of either. but now i want to introduce another trope i am very wary of, which is “i can fix him”. im sure u guys have seen the meme going around poking fun at this trope (for those who havent, its along the lines of “u can fix him? well i can be his worst nightmare”) n no doubt yall would have seen it n gotten sick of it in some forced hetero romantic bullshit. we have one damsel in distress with a saviour that solves all their problems just by existing n being romo with each other.

remember “my preferred dating simulator 101″? this is not mutually exclusive n from my point of view this is dangerously close to this trope. lets be real, if it was actually a thing that all ur deep rooted trauma magically disappears if someone were to waltz into ur life, we would want it. definitely. no painfully dissecting ur own problems n constantly facing them head on. real life states that this is not the case, but it will not stop us from dreaming. n so this trope is born n lives n will go on.

(finally) pulling aesop n eli into this, at least in my mind, u have one severely traumatized boy with lots of issues n u have this. nice mild guy who can be anything u want him to be. i hope u can see where im going with this, n thats the direction i see some elisop heading towards (i dont read a lot of elisop to be fair). if u came from my eli character talk, i mentioned that it is incredibly one sided. this is exactly what im talking about.

putting it all together in case u havent already, aesop is the damsel in distress, whose problems magically disappear because of elis godly kindness n little to no work on improving himself, n they lived happily n gayly ever after.

can u tell how much that does not appeal to me. 

never mind the butchering of character that inevitably happens somewhere somehow, the unrealistically perfect themes n implications of this trope makes me so viscerally uncomfortable. this is, of course, due to personal reasons, n i definitely see the appeal of this dynamic because i would probably have been interested in this once upon a time as well. but as i am now, with everything i have explained up there n everything i have been through, i would politely rather not.

n its difficult to think of another dynamic, because of how little i know about eli apart from him being this saint, which easily makes him a candidate for being aesops trauma panacea. never mind aesop rarely, if ever, does anything for eli as a character in return, n its so damaging to buy into this rhetoric, where a person like this who would solve all ur issues no strings attached exists somewhere in the world. they really dont. a relationship has to be mutually benefitting, or it will be draining n disastrous. maybe u say, Oh its nice to imagine it once in a while. n yeah, i agree, except once in a while is a little difficult to keep track of n that is sort of what happened to me. id rather stay as far away as possible from this kind of unrealistic fantasy, i just got this shit sorted out with myself n my boyfriend.

i have some other reasons, but theyre more personally problematic, so i wont go into them here. but this is mostly n generally why i do not ship elisop romantically. if u do, u do u, and have fun, but again dont expect me to join u. thank u for coming to my ted talk, this took a lot longer than expected.

#mun rambles #its me the mun #unconcerned ramblings #posting this now cos this is a question ive been getting #although this has been worded in the most unnecessarily passive aggressive way possible that i do not appreciate #im wary about all u so called social justice warriors championing this n that liberal idea when all u want to do is stir shit #thankfully i dont have much experience with this but just passively seeing all these ppl run their mouths is getting very annoying #but just know that i will not tolerate any of that bullshit here. because if u really do care about ppl as much as u say u do #then why r u attacking ppl period #ur really just hiding behind a righteous excuse to harm people. thats disgusting. i dont want u here

[anchoviesinthenightsky]

What’re your thoughts on the impact Luca has had for the queer community and for MLMs alike?

Starting off with some heavy hitting questions today huh? /joking

I really appreciate that I'm a person's whose opinion/ thoughts you'd value enough to ask this kind of question.

I have a couple different thoughts, but let me lay out a framework first so you can see where I’m coming from.

Firstly, I’m not a MLM nor am I in the MLM community, so I don't want to speak to their experience or their thoughts, because I’m not intimately familiar with them.

Secondly, I’m coming at this from an American perspective, meaning that I currently (and for better part of the last 5-8 years) have had a lot of access to television and movies that contain queer characters and/or center queerness itself. I think this conversation about Luca (which is Disney meaning that it’s going to be widely available/ made for an international audience to some degree) and its impact might look very different in a place where there is less queer representation in media. But, I can’t speak to that, so I’ll leave that part of the conversation for someone else.

Okay, the framework is set. Let’s get into this.

When talking about the impact that a story has on a community, often times we’re often talking about a few different things, like: what does this representation do for the queer community? Is there an issue that’s given more attention?

I find that queer stories that leave a larger cultural impact often do one of the following things (and ideally more than one):

represent of queer voices/ queer stories in the story

cast queer people to play a character and incorporate that queerness into the characters

educate about queer issues or identities to the audience

advocate / spread awareness about queer issues

normalize queer topics/ lessen the taboo of them

In an earlier draft of this post, I went on to talk about the show The Golden Girls, and how it did a lot of these things during the 1980s-early 1990s, when most other shows were not doing it. That discussion got kind of long, so I'm cutting it out (but if you want to example let me know).

But the point I'm trying to make is that-- stories that have a positive, long lasting, and significant impact for the queer community in the broader culture, require queerness to be written explicitly into the story. It’s hard to advocate, educate, or humanize a community that you refuse to name.

Luca doesn’t have explicitly queer characters. (We read them as queer, but they aren’t explicitly queer. A good comparison might be The Mitchells vs. The Machines, where being queer isn’t a huge part of Katie’s story, but she’s wearing a pride pin the entire time and is shown to have a crush on a girl.)

I will give Luca some credit, because the movie does feature a voice actor who is bi and who uses they/he pronouns, which is wonderful! And I also wouldn't be surprised to learn if there were queer people in the writer's room and/or queer artists who worked on the film. But the story itself is not explicitly queer, so its impact on/for the queer community will always be limited by that.

But but I think a lot of us queer people often find ourselves looking for queerness in stories that don’t explicitly have it. We want to see ourselves represented in a variety of stories.

I think that’s part of why fandom spaces often end up being queer spaces. I forget the post, but there’s a lovely post by a fandom elder who talks about the way that we steal characters away and make them queer. We read the subtext and the nods, and we create the rest ourselves.

I think that it’s fair to say that fandom spaces are important to queer folks and to queer culture itself, because it’s a community where we can write the stories we want to see without having to worry about appeasing straight audiences (or straight higher ups, or straight networks, or homophobic countries who’s markets we want to sell movies in). There’s just us, and the work we create.

And that legacy goes back incredibly far. It goes back to queer zines of Kirk/Spock Star Trek fanfic in the 1960s and 1970s, and likely far beyond that too. As long as there have been queer people, we've found ways to tell queer stories and to reimagine stories as queer.

I think Luca firmly sits in that tradition. And I think that the queerness we add to Luca in our fan-creations, has the same impact that fan work has always had on the queer community— that it allows us to see ourselves as nuanced, valuable, and loved

And in that way, I think Luca is important.

#ask box #long post #anyway those are my thoughts #i think theres a lot more to talk about and a lot of specifics we could dive into #but at the end of the day-- i dont think that media has to be important and culturally significant for us to enjoy it #the only thing that really matters is if its important to us & if participating in the fandom community gives us joy/ a sense of belonging #plus i think that the lack of a queer romance (but so much queer subtext) is what compels a lot of fan creators to create queer stories #its like an itch we have to scratch #(or at least that's how it feels to be) #another thing to mention to-- I didn't grow up with a lot of queer media. I didn't start seeing people like me on tv until well after #I had come out #so my perspective might be skewed bc of that #i think younger folks who got to grow up with a lot of queer media are often a little less tolerant of things being mostly queer in subtext #but for me... that's almost comforting. it's what i grew up with. you know? #im not saying that queerness should always be subtextual and i don't think it should be #but im also not saying it's a bad thing either #you know? zones of gray

[revasnaslan]

Give us your Thane thots

how i feel about this character: thane my beloved 💜💜 he is not my first choice of romance option, but i still adore him with my entire heart. his design is great, i love the drell as a species So Much, even though it's clear they only exist because he does (but we won't get into that today). his backstory is heartbreaking to me, and i'm not just talking about his family, i'm talking about all of it. and the worst part of it is that he doesn't seem to realize just how mistreated he actually was by this system he was raised in, like he made his first kill as a twelve year old thane what the hell. i'd get really REALLY heated if i started going on about the compact, so we also won't get into that today but sufficed to say thane sweetie you need therapy. i do think it was uh... shitty?? of bioware to cut his mlm romance in development.

all the characters i ship romantically with this character: love him and irikah to bits, especially how they met. or well, "met" cause she didn't know who he was at the time. but if there wasn't so much ship hate and die for our ship in this fandom i think they'd be way more popular, considering they're canon. as for other ships... i really like the idea of him and garrus too! idk why but it compells me. him and shep (any gender) is good too!

my absolute favorite for him that isn't him and irikah is him and kaidan though. i'm honestly shocked that this one doesn't pop up more considering they're stuck in the hospital together in 3 for several weeks, and thane outright states they were together when the coup started, implying they hung out during that time. there's also thane promising shep to watch out for him. it has all the makings of a slowburn, one that you can make as tragic as you want depending on if you want thane to die at the end. but i guess it's more fun to write them squabbling over a girl like a pair of teenage boys when they're both in their mid-to-late thirties?? *cough*

my non-romantic otp with this character: looooooooove him and kolyat. they have such a compelling relationship to me, i just wish the fics made it as deep as it actually could be. people seem to skip past the work they'd have to put into fixing their relationship because i guess it's not fun to write about or something.

i also love him and fshep just being friends too! like i like them in a romantic relationship just fine, but ohhhhh my god, the idea of them being best friends who are super close but have no actual interest in getting together is just *chef's kiss* i would love to see this more in fics where she has another romantic relationship going tbh.

my unpopular opinion about this character: he has short person energy and i will not take criticism on that, i see so much fanart where he's like a foot taller than fshep but i personally headcanon him as being around 5'6, or roughly the same height as her per my headcanons. irikah towers over him and he's only interested in people taller than him, don't @ me, he just is.

one thing i wish had happened with this character in canon: this might seem a bit confusing, but i don't actually mind his death so much as how it went down. we knew thane was dying of a terminal illness, so like, we were kind of prepared for it. but i do find it questionable how he just went to c-sec headquarters simply because. idk what he thought he could accomplish there, considering he didn't even know the councilor was there until shep was in the building. and i think this can be chalked up to the writers knowing how they wanted him to die, but not actually thinking of a reason for him to get there. i think they missed a golden opportunity to show his growth by having kolyat be in danger at headquarters, because he's still working on his community service. like it's not a perfect solution, but it makes a hell of a lot more sense for him to be tearing off across the citadel to save his kid than to just go???? when he's literally struggling to breathe???? also sir how could you miss kai leng, he was three feet in front of you and you are an infamous assassin.

my otp: oh god... my favorite ships for him are him and irikah and him and kaidan so

my cross over ship: don't have one

a headcanon fact: after the war, he takes up crocheting. everybody gets a sweater. did you just announce a pregnancy? well congrats because he made you a baby blanket and a set of booties because he went into a crocheting fugue state at 1 am as soon as he heard.

#rev's rambling again #i love him your honor💜💜

[thesharondefenseleague]

mlm imo werent sexualized to the degree that wlw were in most canon media mostly because of the male gaze. Gay and Lesbian relationships or moments got very limited representation. One was probably more sympathetic but also heart breaking like say brokeback mountain. One was explicit but depicted as grotesque or twisted or perverted or immoral in some way. And the last version was the titillating version. In western media because of the assumed straight male gaze lesbians making out to titlate guys was a common thing like say in Jennifer's body. The equivalent of that with guys wasnt really that common not in western media. Not that wlw couldn't like that content but it was made to be fanservice for men .

So thats what I kind of mean by wlw were sexualized at least in western media. This equivalent with mlm in fandom never really existed they never made out for girls to find hot in the same way. It was never marketed like oh look hot guys making out. Fandom did that but not canon.

As for comic book men being sexualized kind of. There is definitely the unrealistic beauty standards but theres that debate of was it for the purpose of titillating women? Or a result of toxic masculinity putting this unattainable unsustainable goal for men. Maybe both? But both in comics and the movies they are based on the posing and clothing and moments with women get made to clearly sexualize them . It especially ovbious with comics with them twisting their bodies so their boobs and butts are jutting out. Or like movie moments like Bruce landing in Natasha's clevage. Or angles where you are staring down a female character's shirt or she has a boob window for some contrived reason. Or just reasons to give full page spreads of them in skimpy clothing.

Its rare men get depicted like this or posed like this. And when they do it often stands out because its not the norm. It's something unique. Not true with men. Even in form fitting spandex they are often posed and framed to make to make them look powerful or intelligent or to reveal things about their character.

Again not that men never get sexualized or that fanservice is always bad. Or that its not a concern that men are having these terrible body image issues. But just that for women for the sexualization its so pervasive and constant was my point.

Its just as bad in wlw in canon as it is for women in relationships with men in canon when it comes to that sexualization but i hear so much more about the problems about the wlw ship than the mlw ship. Like to use DC as a example i hear so much about how people sexualized or mishandle harleyivy but compared to that i hear very little about batcat in comparison even though Catwoman is often just as sexualized in that ship.

As for misogyny in shipping wars yes it definetly exists and is a problem as is racism and homophobia. But my issue is mostly that the problem isnt because the main popular ships are mlm. But so often I see the argument framed that way.

Like shipping wars existed between m/w ships and still do today. And they are still often pretty misogynistic towards the woman in the other ship. I don't even have to look at other fandoms I remember Steggy vs Starton getting real ugly.

Mysogny in fandom doesn't uniquely pop up when mlm are the more popular ship. Its often just as bad in fandoms where m/w is the popular ship. But people just bring it up alot more they make it bout valuing the men over the women .

Well i mean that goes both ways you could say its homophobic for valuing the straight ship as better than the gay one or liking it more. But either way its stupid they dont care bout sexism or homophobia only that their ship is more popular.

Thats the sentiment of all ship wars the gender dynamics and racial make up change nothing. Nothing except the bullshit you use for the ship war.

The problem is that people are being homophobic and mysogynistic and racist not just in regards to fictional characters but towards real people just to win a ship war. It comes out so easily. Thats the problem imo.

Mysogny for example i think isnt discussed as much when its a m/w vs m/w ship war or drama because as both ships have women it can't be used to slander the other ship. But when its drama between fans of a m/m and m/w it comes out alot again not because anyone really cares but because now because one ship lacks a woman it can be used as fodder for what people actually care about. Tearing down the other ship.

Again not that mlm fandom doesnt have mysogny. They definetly do. But they aren't mysogynistic because they ship two guys together. Thats not proof they hate women. Having a ship with women isnt proof that you aren't sexist towards women. There might be homophobia in fandoms of mlm ships and mysogny in fandoms of m/w ships.

But in the drama between a m/w and m/m ships that doesn't get brought up because no one cares if that problem can't be used to show that someone only doesn't ship your ship if they are bigoted against it. Who cares about misogyny if your ship is two guys? Who cares about homophobia if your ship is straight?

No one because they cared about the popularity of their ship not the actual issues.

Gonna under under the cut for length again.

This is a lot to read so I'm gonna respond paragraph by paragraph and hope for the best in terms of comprehension.

When it comes to media made about the LGBTQ+ community, you have to keep in mind when it was made, who made it, and who was it made for. And that it's been shown that straight women have had the same reactions to mlm content as straight men to wlw content. QaF was dumbfounded to find that the majority of their audience was straight women when the show's sex scenes were 95% between two or more men and yet that's what they ran with because hey, it got the views. The views of mlm and wlw content in the mainstream media before then was minimized, despite how fucked a lot of the other content could be. If by "most canon media" being directed at the male gaze being summer blockbusters, and more specifically comic book movies, then sure. If we step out of that box, then not really. The film examples you chose are interesting because BB is portrayed exactly how the author of the original short story wrote it which was meant to be heartbreaking since it was a tragic dramatic piece while JB has a woman who wrote and another woman who directed it while purposefully trying to allow to actress to have a level of sexuality without exploiting her as past directors have (also neither of the main characters are lesbians - one is bi, the other I think is straight but maybe questioning?).

The sexualization of wlw in modern western media is definitely a thing. I mean, the first Iron Man film has stewardesses on the private jet pole dancing if I remember correctly. It took until 2016 to stop sexualizing Scarlett in every movie: the changing scene in IM2, the lowered zipper in A1, the ass shot in Cap 2, the boob faceplant in AoU (in your third paragraph, but mentioning it here anyway). It's a joke that you know when a man directs a wlw indie film during the sex scenes. But the mlm equivalent did exist alongside it, and it's what kicked off the century.

Comics and their movies were always for men. The male bodies are male wish fulfilment for their physical appearance. The women are male wish fulfilment for their dream girls. Funnily enough, one of the least sexualized women in comics I've ever read is Sharon. She's rarely, if ever, drawn to be sexualized for the audience. I'm not even sure she's even been in those swimsuit issues Marvel did years ago. And it shows heavily that Marvel struggles to know how to appeal to women without being aggressively in your face about it. The best example of them appealing without pandering is WV, and the worst is the group shots the Russos did in IW and Endgame, especially the latter.

But the men get those poses in the movies too. Thor bathed shirtless for no reason in TDW. There's a scene in Endgame dedicated to talking about Steve's ass. Pratt in GotG. Rudd in Ant-Man. Most actors are expected to look good shirtless and put themselves through intense shit to look that way. So do the women, but they aren't doing it to have the glamor shots of their muscles. And the MCU is not the only film franchise like this. Most, if not all, franchises with majority or entirely male leads expects them all to look like bodybuilders. And I'm gonna take back that it's just for the male audience, because these bodies are meant to appeal to women who are intended to thirst for these actors too. They think these bodies is what will bring women to the theaters.

None of this will change, as you say, that women's sexualization is "constant and pervasive". The film industry is just a part of the larger whole of media. Television and advertising have a treatment of women that's beyond whatever you or I say because there are decades worth of shit to go through that would take dozens of essays worth of writing to fully divulge beyond "please stop it's gross".

Now DC is a whole other ballgame. They're pretty infamous for their artists' sexualization of heroines and villainesses. Harley, Ivy, and Selina are definitely pretty bad, but when I remember what I've seen drawn of Kara, Kori, or sometimes Barbara... But outside of one artist, I think Harley and Ivy as a couple have been drawn tamely. Can't say the same for Selina, because they just can't not draw every part of her body even when she's fully clothed.

I think it's hard not to talk about fandom misogyny outside of m/m ships because of how often popular m/m shippers have rooted their shipping into misogyny. And even with m/f ship wars, a lot of the time the "faulted" character is always the woman when majority of the time it's the man who sucks. I don't get why everyone is fighting for who should kiss Steve because Steve sucks and they'd be better off without him. But because Steve is the object of affection for our fave, we have to fight off everyone else.

Don't look at other fandoms for m/f ship wars. We don't appreciate how tame we were, even at our worst. I'm serious, I've seen so much worse.

I think why the topic of misogyny comes up more with m/m ships is because they follow a similar principle of the male characters being more developed in canon and fanon so it's who people gravitate towards.

There is definitely layers of homophobia in fandom, but there's many versions of how we see it. Homophobes who won't ship anything that's not m/f. Homophobes who ship m/m but won't support IRL rights. People who love m/m but abhor f/f, and vice-versa. The shippers who use them for personal fodder. But the sexism is more prevalent than the homophobia. And the racism way more than both combined.

And it does cause a lot of ammo, and much of it severely unjustified, in ship wars. Literally the bullshit I've seen pulled out of thin air to accuse Sharon of not being worthy because someone said she's a racist for [they literally had no reason just called her one because we said Sam and Sharon are friends because they are] and other nonsense.

The real world repercussions of the homophobia, the sexism, and the racism in fandom... there's just so much. Like we are all still people, and yet we decide because we hide behind screens to be antagonistic, and use homophobic, sexist, and racist shit to attack each other over ships just because we want to paint the other person as crazy, I guess? If you can't see that there are no enemies in ship wars and that the other side is still people, maybe you need to sit out and log off. It's baffling how often it still happens to people. Then it's no longer about ships, it's about who is an asshole.

I will say that Steve and Peggy vs Steve and Sharon is probably the only m/f ship war I've seen where misogyny is talked about. Is, not was, because it still is. Both sides call the others misogynistic. I don't think either side is, but you can see in individuals. Those who tweeted at a certain actress that she was a slut for kissing her costar certainly are though.

You are right that shipping m/m isn't inherently sexist. But tearing down women in those ships to prop up m/m has made me stop shipping certain characters altogether. People, seriously, we don't have to justify why we like them! We can just like them! And other characters can still exist! It's never been that deep.

And you're right, the popularity of the ship helps people ignore any deeper issues within them and this is a power used to silence valid criticism if it pops up.

(I hope I answered everything well for you.)

~Mod R

[ingravinoveritas]

Ok that was saltier than necessary. But when you're an old-as-balls gay then everything is political. Surely you can see that rpf is distasteful to the vast majority of folk anyway?! Putting it under a cut is a matter of courtesy. I still had to scroll to the bottom in order to block your tags. If I had to go blocking every _fandom name_rpf tag it would take forever. rpf alone is good enough but I guess you won't use it because of my shitty tone *sad trombone*

Also your sexuality doesn't matter here whatever it is, because you're still not a gay man, and don't know what it's like. And I mean that as neutral a statement as possible.Flicking your bean to slash rpf doesn't make you a gay ally. Sorry. Do what you like and be happy, but don't try and pretend that this is progressive. I don't wish you ill, it's just frustrating to being able to avoid seeing mlm being fetishised. Take care x (2/3)

Okay okay I checked my blocklist and I'm a fucking idiot. I am guilty of being an technological idiot. But I stand by everything else I said abt mlm rights and using cuts etc 100%. But we'll get nowhere on that I think. Enjoy your slash rpf I guess. c ya. (3/3)

There are so many things I want to say to this, Anon. So many thoughts I had as I read your messages, emotions ranging from revulsion to disgust to just plain sadness. I will start by saying that you’re right about one thing. I am not a gay man. I am many different things, and a gay man is not one of them, that much is true. So I won’t sit here and tell you that I have so many gay friends and what a great ally that makes me, because that’s just tired, and it doesn’t prove a damn thing.

What I will tell you is that I am someone who is on the autism spectrum.

I am someone who knows what it’s like to be different, and to be hated and rejected for something that is a part of who you are. Something that you can’t change, even when you go to bed every night praying like hell to wake up as someone else--anyone else--in the morning, because growing up all I wanted was to be dead instead of being who I was.

I know that feeling very well, and I have found a tremendous amount of friendship in the gay community as a result, friendships with some of the kindest and most wonderful people I have ever known. People that I treasure and cherish and would fight for any fucking day of the week, even when I sometimes barely have enough strength to fight my own battles. I don’t know where exactly that puts me on the ally spectrum, but I also won’t sit here and be accused of not caring about the people I love.

I’m also not sure where you get off claiming that I’m pretending to be progressive. I do not write RPF out of some misguided belief that it makes me enlightened or advanced about LGTBQIA rights. Nor do I write it to fetishise gay men, because I don’t write it because Michael and David are gay...I write it because they’re them. If all I wanted was to see two men fucking, I could watch gay porn and be done with it. Right? Easy-peasy. But what captivates and fascinates and inspires me is relationships. The dynamic between two people, the chemistry, how they interact with each other. Hell, I actively avoided shipping Michael and David when I first got into GO last year, until the Great “He’s My Lover” Incident of June 2019 occurred, followed by the Press Tour of Endless Mouth Staring, and then it was all downhill from there.

But I can understand RPF not being everyone’s cup of tea, Anon. I can understand folks not wanting to read it (even if the majority of responses to my fic have all been pretty positive) and wanting those posts to be tagged as such, so if I failed to do that or didn’t put it behind a cut, then that is on me.

What I cannot understand, however, is you nearly torpedoing any valid points you set out to make by coming at me with some seriously misogynistic language and a clear dislike for women behind it. “Flicking your bean”? I realize that you are not inclined to see the appeal of female masturbation, Anon, but your disdain is more than palpable.

Your phrasing also reduces my arousal and why the thought of Michael and David together turns me on to something completely base and simple...when in reality it’s anything but. So, yeah...I have a bit of a problem with that, and while I know you said that you don’t wish me ill, surely you can see how language like that is insulting at best, and at worst, downright dehumanizing.

I truly am sorry for your frustration and what you have been through, Anon, but that does not give you the right to take it out on me. I just hope one day you’ll be able to find some peace and better outlets for your anger than fanfic writers on Tumblr.

#anonymous #reply post #fanfic #writing #good omens rpf #personal post #the fact that i even gotta respond to this #i can't even with this nonsense #no idea how i wrote such a calm response #but there you go #Sunday mornings are officially no longer easy #but David Tennant still is #can i hear a wahoo #fandom woes #discourse

[icarus-died-laughing]

rant below the cut

so let’s talk about the term str*ggot. i hate it :)

i haven’t seen it used in a while but can we just like... not use it anymore? my biggest issue about it the fact that it’s literally doing the same thing that f*ggot was doing in the first place, but the other way around. it’s judging people based on their sexuality, something that cannot be change. i find it honestly very hipocritical and damaging.

not only are you judging people over their sexuality, the very reason queer people are oppressed anyway, you’re potentially damaging other queer people. some people forget that queer people can also be attracted to the “opposite” sex. there are hetero aro and/or ace people. there are hetero trans people. does that make them any less a part of this community? hell no, and if you think so, get off my blog. 

another thing that irks me about this is the fact that i’ve seen MANY afab people using str*ggot and while i’d never want to assume anything, some of the sorta have to be cis women. i’ve talked and talked and talked about how much i HATE seeing cis girls using f*ggot, and seeing them using str*ggot makes me feel the same. the word they’re transforming, trying to reclaim, is not. their. word. it’s just not. i don’t care if they’re queer, if they’re women, they shouldn’t be using it in the first place. end of story. it’s appropriating a word that was never theirs, and it’s gross. 

honestly it just strengthening the terf rhetoric that’s been rebranded as an empowering thing. it makes mlm feel bad for liking men. i imagine it makes bi girls feel bad for liking men, trans guys feel predatory, and straight trans people feel like traitors. (i obviously can’t speak for everyone, but that’s what i’d feel like if i was in their shoes.)

i’m not saying that heterophobia is a thing, because you can’t oppress the opressors, but i am saying that it makes you an asshole.

i’m also not trying to defend the straight people that actually are opressors. i’m saying we shouldn’t generalize straight people, because that’s what they’ve been doing to us for so long. 

tl;dr: let’s stop using str*ggot, especially if you’re a woman. it’s counterproductive and as a gay man, it makes me VERY uncomfortable. thanks :)

#not mlm #not nblm #queer discourse #discourse tw #vent tw #rant t #ask to tag