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#because im overwhelmed from tasks. i dokt get to do things for me
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I am feeling very very stressed and overwhelmed and I just want to scream, it's like sensory overload but information overload at the same time. Task overload.
#i feel ashamed about it and thats why its hard to address it.#because im overwhelmed from tasks. i dokt get to do things for me#my boyfriend was sitting at the table and smoking while looking at stuff online. he kept talking to me about his finds#but meanwhile i made a cake (which was my own birthday cake) and then cleaned up#made bread dough and made supper. ate supper with him. then cleaned up again. made coffee and sat down#only to be asked to look at stuff online. and then we had to go to bed to get up early today#i barely sat down and it stresses me out#but i feel so bad because he works all week in a shitty office job and i have housework but as soon as hes off the clock#hes asking me to do things (sometimes wjrth him if he can do part of it) and i dokt have a break between then#like today: i prepped the bread to bake and then did the dishes. i said i was miffed avout having to dishes to wash so early in the day#he said -well its not so bad youll be done in a minute then make breakfast- like. yeah but IM the one making breakfast. so i have to BOTH#and sometimes it gets so exhausting.#he sleeps better than i do too. last night we went to bed at 10pm with the alarm set for 6:30am. he fell asleep at 10:05 but me at midnight#i woke up at 2am to pee and then at 5:30am i wake up and so does he. i drink water and he goes to pee then asks the time#when i told him he said -does it evsn make a difference if we get up now- so i went -absolutely it does. im sleeping-#like!! you slept solid for 7 hours but i barely slept 5 hours tossing and turning#the new pain meds are helping so my baseline pain is like 3 or 4 on a scale to 10 instead of being 6/10.#but im still sore all the time and it flares up#and I'm not sleeping well and i had to stopt therapy because of no in-person appointments. im struggling and its exhausting#i appreciate everything that he does for us and i know he works so hard. but im struggling and its hard to admit it because i feel bad#i feel bad because his work is hard too. sow why should i complain? im a housewife. but im a young woman and ive had years of struggle#and im not completely out of it#anyway. thats it for now#kelly.tor
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