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#because I could have gone my whole life without being traumatised y'know!! It's not like it made me a better person
justapieceintheirgames
·
3 years
Text
🔭✨
#omg so I drank nearly 1L of iced caramel coffee today and my body has been shaking all day
#and it was delicious and worth it but now I can't sleep UWGHWHS I can hear birds it's (looks at clock) 6AM!?!?!?
#anyway I wanted to hop on here and recall something nice that happened to me recently
#by recently I could mean a couple of weeks or a month honestly my perception of time is just not good
#side note these birds are reALLY LOUD TODAY
#anyway even though I 100% believe in fate I always hated when people would say 'be grateful for all the bad things that happened in your
#past because they led you to where you are today' or something along those lines idk it's meant to be motivational or something I GUESS?
#well as someone who was traumatised from a really young age I would almost physically recoil when I would hear/read something like that
#because I could have gone my whole life without being traumatised y'know!! It's not like it made me a better person??
#that and like I always felt that if anything I'd be a BETTER version of myself y'know??
#so anyway the other day (or month or something idk) I had just finished praying and the sun was setting
#and my cat was sitting on my windowsill observing me and I'm smiling just from picturing the scene again
#I looked over at her and without even thinking I thought
#'if all the bad things that happened in life are what led me to this exact moment then I'm glad for it'
#it wasn't anything particularly special but I just felt so at peace in that one moment??? and as soon as I thought that I couldn't believe
#myself! And I really meant it too!!
#like who---? ME??
#anyway all I do is come on here and post sad stuff so I thought this post would be a nice reminder/change for myself!!
#even though the weeks following that were ... ROUGH LOL my mindset has noticeably changed for the better recently I feel
#personal
#also it's officially Ramadan! You guys have NO idea how excited I am
#to basically press the hard reset button on my brain this month
#it's always always the best time of the year!! ✨
#also I feel like I've had enough coffee for a month MY BODY IS STILL SHAKING LOL??
#I...hope that I can concentrate on my coursework tomorrow :') or later today? aaa goodnight
#MY PHONE'S NIGHTMODE JUST AUTOMATICALLY SWITCHED OFF SJHAHJSBBKS
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