some of you are way too mean to your younger self. and i don’t even mean you as a young child i mean the you from four years ago. the you from eight years ago. the you from two months ago. the you that still exists in you, still deserves love and support and not judgement or to be called cringe by the you right now. be nicer to them, they still want your love.
Love how with my symptoms most abled people would just stay home and rest but here I am feeling guilty about it because I am not “actually sick” as if it would matter if you feel sick because you have a cold or something or because of a chronic illness 🙄 As if you had to earn the right to be sick 🙄
Getting a bit personal on here, but I’ve been going through it for the past 3 months. In July I had the worst breakdown in my life and tried to do self harm and now I’ve developed some sort of skin condition that isn’t going away. I look at old pictures of myself and I’m incredibly disappointed because that girl did not deserve any of the terrible things I would say or do to myself.
After that breakdown I haven’t had one since and haven’t been hard on myself at all. I didn’t deserve to treat myself that way and neither should anyone else. Now I’m trying to figure out this skin issue but I think it’s just trauma that’s going to take a long time to heal and go back to normal.
If you’re struggling with body dysmorphia or self image, please please please! Be kinder to yourself. They are irrational thoughts, it’s not real, you deserve to be free of those negative thoughts, you are fine and beautiful just the way you are and your body can do so many amazing things that we just take for granted. Stress will damage you and it will begin to manifest itself the more you say hurtful things about yourself or treat yourself poorly.
I just want to share this because I want others to feel, and this might sound cliche, but that you are not alone! Everyday is a new day, yes we make mistakes and that’s okay, but please be kinder and learn to love yourself. ♥️
We are all trying to navigate our lives through our past traumas that have ultimately shaped our current identity. It is not only shaped by the impact of each traumatic event on our physical body/ nervous system, but also from the repetitive negative thoughts and feelings that we have created about ourselves because of them. Those ruminating thoughts and feelings reinforce and cement those experiences as ‘who we are.’ It is up to us to call b.s., figure out who we truly are and/or want to be, and put in the consistent work to change our identity.
I am quite surprised to come to the conclusion that it is indeed possible to be proud of your past work
I came across an old poem of mine in a notebook and thought I was quite clever with the rhyme scheme. In fact, I can't even think of anything I dislike about it. I didn't even remember it existed!
I'm not going to bother turning this into a poem. The message is all here; you feel it as well as I do.
One of the most interesting things about The Murderbot Diaries to me is that you have a main character who is effectively a shepherd in a setting where it believes not only are the sheep above it (it may resents this fact but still does believe it, just not in the way it’s supposed to) but that upon learning its true identity that the members of its flock will misidentify the shepherd the same way it does itself; as a wolf.
ok but now as ive continued to work on and unlearn my old patterns its become so much easier to just keep going when bad things happen? like i'm gonna be fine. nothing is ever as World Ending as it seems. pausing and regaining my footing before i react is more than okay. its the kindest thing i can do and This sucks but im going to be fine i'm going to figure it out and there will be happiness again. and like there's always gonna be shit to deal with but ive dug myself out of misery before and goddammit i'll do it again. it feels so good to have my own back like this