A Date Gone Wrong
A little humor for you guys! I hope you guys like it and please leave your thoughts in the comments!
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Eddie was never going to let Steve plan any of their dates ever again. He was having fun for a while, he would give him that. The hike was a little too much of a trek but the view, picnic, and company were amazing…
Until the squirrel came.
For the past couple of weeks that they’d been dating, Eddie had been the one making all of the plans. He arranged movie nights, smoke outs, and trips to the bowling alley. He liked planning things and focusing all of his attention into making the best plans he could, it was what made him such a good DM. But he could understand why Steve felt he himself wasn’t putting enough effort in. He showed his love through gifts and cuddled affection. However, Steve was not good at planning. He decided for his first date to take Eddie to do something requiring physical exertion, and not in a fun way. Also, he unknowingly took Eddie to a place where he was surrounded by things he didn’t like.
Fresh air, sunlight, mean and scary rodents with bushy tails, bugs, the list continues. But Eddie was doing a great job ignoring all of that by focusing on Steve. He looked amazing and his tan skin stretched over delicious muscles as he walked. Even the sun was focusing on how hot his boyfriend was. The beams of sunlight that fell on him made him look like an angel.
They sat down just past midday to eat the picnic Steve prepared for them and inside the little cooler was the best sandwich Eddie had ever tasted. He groaned in pleasure and sent Steve a thumbs up. He’d never experienced a grilled chicken sandwich with pesto mayonnaise as delicious as this one. Eddie was just starting to relax, to enjoy this outdoors date when it happened.
A small squirrel ran up to Steve and climbed into his lap, nibbling on the crumbs from his sandwich that rested there. The both paused, albeit for different reasons. Steve didn’t want to disrupt the little creature or scare it at all so he didn’t move a muscle. Eddie, though, was terrified and he couldn’t move out of fear. He’d been terrified of squirrels ever since he was a kid when he was chased, peed on, and climbed on in quick succession when he’d first moved in with Wayne. Now was no exception.
But he was also torn because he was dating a true life Disney princess and he couldn’t help but see the situation as unnecessarily adorable even despite his heart pounding in his chest. He enjoyed the view for another moment before the squirrel jumped off of Steve’s lap and took a tiny step towards him.
Then, all bets were off. Eddie screamed shrilly in terrified horror and threw the glorious sandwich at the rabid beast. It barely even paused its stride and skittered ever closer.
“Steve! It’s after me, ahhhhh!” He shrieked. Eddie stumbled to his feet and took off running down the trail they’d used to get to that spot. He kept running, wheezing and all, until he reached the Beemer. He put his hands on his knees and panted as he regained his breath. Eddie hadn’t had such a close encounter with death since the Upside Down a few months ago. It’s a wonder he could even outrun the bats then because his lungs right now felt like they could explode. He had to stop smoking so much, Jesus Christ.
He recognized that Steve wasn’t beside him but he was only slightly worried. He saw him rip a demobat in half before so he would be fine… probably.
Just a few minutes later, he heard a throat clear above him. He looked up to find Steve wearing the most unimpressed look he’s ever seen from him. “What the hell, Eddie?! It was a squirrel!”
“I have a deathly squirrel of fears! Fuck- no, I mean I have a deathly fear of squirrels! I feel like I’ve mentioned it before.”
“You definitely have not! I would’ve remembered that, for sure.” Steve accentuated his words with jerks of his head full of judgment.
Deciding to be a little shit for the afternoon, Eddie decided to mess with him. “Stevie, I am positive that I told you. We had a whole conversation about it, you were very understanding.”
“Oh, no, no!” Steve pointed an accusing finger at him. “Do not turn this around on me! Robin told you not to use my head trauma to your advantage, you manipulative bastard. I will call her!”
“Okay, okay, Big Boy, calm down. Jesus Christ, I’m just messing around. Please don’t sic your lesbian guard dog on me!” Eddie pleaded with him, laughter in his chest.
“My god Munson, get in the car.”
“This stays between us though, right? Because Buckley threatened to shave my eyebrows off the next time I did that and I’m pretty sure you’re a fan of my eyebrows. They really bring my face together,” Eddie asked him over the hood of the car.
“Fine but you owe me,” Steve said humorously pointing a finger at him.
“Oh Stevie, don’t you know already that everything of mine is already yours?”
Steve’s face flushed red and he grumbled once more before ducking into his car. Eddie wouldn’t let him hide that adorable little blush though and he climbed in right after him. He grabbed his free hand in his and brought it up to his lips for a kiss, pulling out all of the romantic movies he could before Steve could make a move of his own. He loved this guy and if an outdoor excursion, squirrel attacks, and threats from Robin Buckley were conditions to keep him happy, Eddie would handle them in stride.
Steve drove them back to the Munson trailer where they smoked a little, cuddled, and watched Ferris Bueller's Day Off. It was one of the best days of Eddie's life and by far the best date he'd ever been on. With an ending like this, it wasn’t such a bad date after all.
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I feel terrible...
...that while watching “Dream of a Thousand Cats” yet again, the skull-headed Raven comes down to speak to the Prophet Cat, and says (in @neil-gaiman ‘s voice), “In the mountain there is a cave...”
...and something in the back of my head just CAN NOT FECKING BE PREVENTED from supplying the next phrase as: “...the Cave of Caer Bannog.”
(amused headclutch) Maybe it’ll eventually get better.
...But I’m not betting on it. [insert rueful Python-saturated grin here]
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02.02.2024 ~ birthday month!
I'm not big on religious holidays, but the Chandeleur is pretty cool. According to Wikipedia, it is something to do with presenting Jesus to the Temple, bringing light (chandelles is candles in french) to the nations blablabla
As I said, not big on religion. So where is my interest coming from, you ask? My answer is simple: the crêpes 🥞
We traditionally eat crêpes on this day, and in my family we make them. Everyone is happy: minimal cooking and dishes, delicious meal, festive vibes. My grandpa has a recipe with rhum, you can also add apple cider (because Bretagne). Sadly here in Germany I didn't find cider and I'm not buying rhum for this, so it's the simplest version.
🎂 alsoooo February is my birthday month and as i am away from family and friends i wanted to ask what do people do in this case to make it special? I want to go to the cinema this month for example, take myself on coffee date, maybe do a manicure... Any idea of small nice things to do is appreciated! ☺️🎁
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