#b*den’s a puppet and you all know it

[lucky-clover-gazette]

all work and no play makes blue a dull girl

gift fic for @deuynndoodles!

Blue arrives in the same form as usual: slightly incensed, with sore muscles and tousled hair and a cartoonishly large hammer strapped to her back. Erune watches her close the front door, step out of her boots, and stretch her arms over her head in the foyer of their tiny Castle Town home. Blue opens her eyes and meets Erune’s gaze.

“Hylia,” she groans, already making her way to the den. “This has been a long day.”

Erune lowers her nail gun and holds a palm out towards Blue. “Stop. You’re barefoot. I don’t want you getting splinters.”

She’s set herself up on the tarped-over floor, kneeling beside a sturdy wooden frame in progress. To her side is a large piece of fabric, made with patched-together clothes formerly belonging to Red, Blue, Vio, Green, and Shadow, as well as numerous pieces of woodworking equipment. Tiny shreds of wood litter the tarp, and the smell of cedar wafts through the room.

“Sorry,” Blue says, stepping back into her boots by the front door. She returns to the den and crosses her arms over her chest. “Permission to enter?”

“Granted,” Erune says with a smile, beckoning Blue inside with a gloved hand. “Here.” She passes Blue a pair of plastic goggles identical to her own, which Blue puts on immediately,

“Are you making progress?” Blue asks, sizing up the project.

Erune nods. “Yes. Thanks again for fetching the fabric, by the way.”

“No problem. The others were happy to help. The frame looks… stable?”

Erune chuckles and grins, shaking her head. She’s tried to explain her vision to Blue before—a puppet theater for the Castle Town children she teaches—but she’s almost positive that the blueprints are inscrutable to anyone but herself.

“It’s holding up great,” she tells Blue, shaking it at its foundation in demonstration. “What about you?”

Blue raises an eyebrow under her goggles. “You mean, how am I holding up? Fine, I guess.”

“You said you had a long day.”

“It wasn’t that bad. It’s just, I’m not used to doing knight stuff without the others. They’re all out of town right now.”

“Really? All of them at the same time?”

“Really,” Blue sighs, counting her friends with her fingers. “Green is visiting Hytopia with Zelda, Vio and Shadow are off in the Dark World doing Hylia knows what, and Red’s on some mushroom foraging camping retreat with Tingle. And I’m just here, crossing my fingers that nobody gets assassinated, injured, poisoned, or all of those things at once.”

Erune places down her nail gun and lends Blue her full attention. “I understand that you care about them,” she says slowly, carefully, “but you’re your own person now. Time apart is good for you.”

“I guess.”

Erune cracks a smile. “Also… Tingle?”

“I don’t know,” Blue grumbles, pinching the bridge of her nose. “They’re in some kind of foraging club together. It’s pretty stupid.”

“Aw, but that’s fun!”

“Just seems like a waste of time. Like, Green’s away, but he’s still acting as Zelda’s knight. Vio and Shadow wrote the trip to the Dark World off as a research mission, even though we all know that’s a lie, but they’ll probably bring at least something back to show for it.”

Erune narrows her eyes. “And you’re working hard, I presume?”

“Of course!”

“Don’t you think Red’s working hard, too? Searching for mushrooms?”

Blue rubs the back of her neck. “Maybe, but it’s for a dumb hobby, not… y’know, actual work.”

“It doesn’t seem like Hyrule is currently under attack,” Erune reasons, dusting off her gloved hands on her skirt. She gets to her feet and removes the gloves, using a single hand to cup Blue’s face. “Have you defended the kingdom today, Blue?”

She can feel her cheek getting warm. It’s adorable.

“Well? Have you?”

Blue sighs, closes her eyes, and leans into Erune’s touch. “No. I polished my armor and sparred in the courtyard.”

Erune gives Blue’s cheek a gentle pat and removes her hand. Blue clearly misses it once it’s gone. “I’d argue, then,” Erune says, kneeling back down by the wooden frame, “that Red’s doing just as much ‘actual work’ as you or I.”

She can hear Blue’s grumbles as she slides on her gloves. “It’s just… silly.”

“Is this silly?” Erune asks, motioning to her project.

Blue looks offended by the notion on Erune’s behalf. “No, of course not!”

“Oh yes, it absolutely is! And that’s what’s great about it! It’ll make the kids happy to use, and it makes me happy to build. It’s hard work and it’s fun work.”

“Sparring is fun,” Blue offers, avoiding her girlfriend’s goofy smile.

“My point exactly. So stop obsessing about the others and focus on what makes you happy. Also, say hello to your adoring girlfriend.”

Blue rolls her eyes, but now she’s smiling too. “Hello, adoring girlfriend. You're something that makes me happy.”

“Cute,” Erune says. “Now please hand me a hammer.”

Blue raises the massive hammer she used to kill god or whatever, and Erune just snorts.

“Wrong hammer, but I like your spirit.”

Blue returns the hammer to its place on her back and hands Erune a much smaller rubber mallet. “Do the kids know you're making this for them?”

“Nope!” says Erune. “They just know there's going to be a fun surprise for them after their spring break next week. That gives me more than enough time to finish it up.”

Blue cocks her head as she watches her girlfriend work. “Spring break, huh? I don't think you've mentioned that before.”

Erune shrugs. “Well, I'm still technically going to be working on this thing, and you… y’know. Like you said, you love your work. I respect that.”

“I could take some time off. If you wanted to go somewhere.”

Shaking her head, Erune taps a nail into the foundation. “Really, Blue, it’s all right—”

“No, actually, I insist that we take a trip together next week. A vacation. Wherever you want.”

Erune blows hair out of her face, growing slightly frustrated by the lateness of this offer. “The thought is nice, but I promised the children I’d finish this thing by the time break ends.”

And there’s that determination that Erune loves so much. Blue narrows her eyes and places a hand on her shoulder. “Yeah, well, you won’t have to do it alone. Think we can finish it together in the next couple of days?”

Erune pretends to think it over (the answer is easily yes). “Hmmm… I suppose, as long as we’re together...”

Blue grins and cracks her knuckles. “Great. Then it’s settled. Tell me how to help.”

“Here,” Erune says, passing Blue an extra pair of gloves from her toolbox. “Safety first.”

“I’m the Hero of Hyrule, I think I’d be fine without gloves.”

“Last week I watched you almost lose a finger while cutting a frozen bagel.”

Blue has no response to this. Erune picks up the large piece of fabric, holds it up against the wooden frame, and turns to Blue.

“Hold this in place while I staple, please.”

“Got it.”

Erune prepares her staple gun with a smirk. “Watch your fingers.”

Blue does as asked as Erune attaches the fabric to the frame, but of course her mind still wanders. “So, uh… where would you want to go? We could spend a couple days pretty much anywhere—Village of the Blue Maiden to visit your dads, Gerudo Desert, even the Dark World, now that the mirror’s been repaired with moon pearl dust or whatever.”

Erune sours. “One visit to the Dark World was enough, thanks.”

“Oh, right. Sorry.”

“It’s okay, darling.” And it truly is, it’s been more than a year. But still… the thought of that place still sends chills down her back.

“Darling…” Blue repeats, and Erune swats her arm.

“Fingers!”

“Sorry. Again.”

Erune nods, satisfied with Blue’s stillness, and finishes stapling the fabric to the foundation.

“That should do nicely,” she says, glancing down at her blueprints for the next step. “And I like the idea of the Village of the Blue Maiden. We don’t need to stay with my dads, though—let’s rent a place near the beach.”

“I won’t argue with that.”

“Smart girl,” Erune says, kissing Blue on the forehead. “I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

#four swords #blue link #fs #my writing

[wizardlyghost]

- we pick up in the MEMORY DEN. this place looks like it was converted from an old theatre, but somebody took the care to keep a bunch of the old theatre stuff around, so i’m assuming someone who knew anything about boston would probably recognise this place.

- DR AMARI has her setup in the basement. i’m not sure if the COMMONWEALTH has a medical license system, but even if it doesn’t i feel like hers has been revoked Anyway.

- lady that is a human(?) brain you’re handling. at least put on some gloves. come on.

- ok so it seems like KELLOGG was actually a real guy, just “upgraded” by the INSTITUTE. like i’ve never set foot on any kind of school campus while medicated for my adhd but from what little i can remember from psychology 1101 i’m pretty sure the hippocampus (this thing) has more to do with the encoding/retrieval of memory than memory and/or personality storage (feel free to correct if i’m wrong).

- if i’m right, this thing was probably “installed” by the INSTITUTE to make him a more effective/useful tool. given that we’re standing in the MEMORY DEN, i feel like it has one or both of two functions:

     - a) DIRECT DOWNLOAD INTERFACE. if KELLOGG was in fact a real boy, this would make him an outlier among the SYNTHS that usually do the INSTITUTE’s dirty work (makes sense tactically, using the SYNTHS for most work and KELLOGG & CO. when boots-on-the-ground initiative/creativity is needed). the INSTITUTE has been extremely shadowy so far, but it does kinda fit my picture of them to think downloading mission parameters directly into their human operatives’ heads rather than using words is a logical step. it’s probably also how they give directions to the SYNTHS anyway, so it’d be more efficient to use the same infrastructure to communicate with everyone than to reinvent the walkie talkie for one guy.

          - if this is the case, i’m probably gonna be accessing the IMPLANT’s log of instructions recieved/communications sent, rather than KELLOGG’s TWO-WEEKS-IN-MY-POCKET-GETTING-COVERED-IN-PINK-GOOP BRAIN itself. unless the IMPLANT makes a complete backup of the subject’s brain to be sent off to/recovered by the INSTITUTE for rebodying, in which case i could indeed be accessing his full memories, or whatever fragments of them are still in the IMPLANT’s outbox. KELLOGG might not have been a SYNTH when i met him, but he could very well be by now.

     - b) MEMORY INHIBITOR. this function is a lot more insidious, and would lend some terrible context to the “we’re all puppets” speech. potentially the INSTITUTE wasn’t paying KELLOGG, but rather blackmailing him, threatening to cut him off from the memories in his own head. i can see this device being developed as some kind of anti-interrogation failsafe - can’t divulge sensitive information if you don’t remember getting it - and then being adapted as a “motivator”. it’s possible KELLOGG himself didn’t know why he came to VAULT 111, and i’ll be accessing memories that he literally couldn’t tell me about even if he wanted to.

     - i did think of c) EMERGENCY SELF-DESTRUCT DEVICE, but given that i had to kill him myself i think that one can be ruled out.

- side note 1: the fuzzyness of the background/corners in here combined with the context that this place is an INCEPTION OPIUM DEN makes me instinctively suspicious that maybe i’m already dreaming. i Do Not Like this place.

- side note 2: this is how big wikipedia says a HUMAN HIPPOCAMPUS should be:

- so KELLOGG probably definitely was Not Doing Ok on a medical level.

#FALLOUT 4 LIVEBLOG: THE GHOST FALLS OUT #FALLOUT 4: THE RESURRECTION OF OSHA #fallout 4

[naivesilver]

What's your fave/least fave versions of Mangiafuoco? The dude seems kinda ambiguous but Disney really did him dirty...

Stepping into the den of the beast, uh, anon? Well, thank you for giving me a chance to rant once again. I'll put everything under the cut because I don't want to clog everyone's dashes with my delirium.

So, the problem with Mangiafuoco is that contrary to other characters I don't necessarily mind seeing him used as a villain. His role is that of the merciful tyrant, the mood swing riddled man, the ogre who is not truly evil, but if you're making a movie about the story of Pinocchio and don't have the time to pack every scene into it, or if you need to cut some corners, then he is the easiest character to erase the duality of. No time for the Gorilla Judge plot? It's fine, Mangiafuoco can lock Pinocchio up. Coachman seems unnecessary? Well, the dude SHOULD be able to drive a carriage, right?

As such, even if not every adaptation gave him the justice he needed, there are only two versions of him that I actually despise - Puppettino from Emperor of the Night, and Disney's Stromboli. And while Puppettino was terrible because HIS MOVIE was terrible, Stromboli's flaws went far beyond quality. It was a matter of principle.

Imagine, if you will, that a well-renowned studio finally makes a movie about a story that is pivotal to your culture. You watch it, expecting to finally see some representation about your life experience...and it turns out everything that made that story yours has been americanized, mixed and mashed with neighboring countries' lore and costumes because who gives a fuck, and the only slightly faithful character is a) a villain b) a heavily-accented stereotype and c) part of that long-standing tradition of flamboyantly ambiguous evil characters that nowadays Disney would happily call "their first gay character". And to top it all off, this is the only version of the tale everyone ends up remembering, often being dismissive of its true origins.

What I've said might ring familiar to many, especially members of minorities that have grown up with mainstream media (and in fact, if you have examples of similar situations about cultures that don't belong to me, feel free to send them over - I will gladly give those warnings a boost), and it's EXACTLY what Disney did to Pinocchio, and to Stromboli, specifically. The movie could have been salvageable - decent, even. If not for him.

(And Jiminy Cricket, but I can't spend every Pinocchio post complaining about Jiminy, now, can I?)

But thankfully, the Disney movie is now 81 years old, we can put it well behind us, and there are way better Mangiafuoco interpretations to draw from in what has been published since then. I'll gladly list a few, in no particular order, because these are all genuinely good.

Pinocchio (2019)

One of Gigi Proietti's last performances, and one that allowed him to both flex his theater acting muscles and express his unbelievably charming and positive aura. There's a softness to his scenes with Pinocchio that fits perfectly with the atmosphere of the movie, and if Garrone's Pinocchio was already a whimsical, comforting experience, the actor's passing fits another layer of nostalgia over Mangiafuoco's appearances. Thank you for this, Gigi. Truly. You will be missed.

Le Avventure di Pinocchio (1972)

What Mangiafuoco should be - he was an arsehole to everyone, but he gave Pinocchio mercy, food AND clothes, which is exactly what a child living in poverty would need first (also the golden coins, but those didn't go that well). Comencini's miniseries' peculiarity is that it's constantly a bit rough around the edges, far from polished perfection, and what's rougher than a giant of a man bellowing at teeny tiny puppets? A+.

The Adventures of Buratino/Buratino and the Golden Key

I want to know what the fuck was the deal with him SO BAD...Why hide a key in the house of a man like Papa Carlo Geppetto? Especially a key that important? I so wish the Italian dub could be found somewhere, because I can't keep track of the stuff happening if I have subs and I don't know shit in Russian. I only know he was balls to the walls and thriving, and that anyone employing the likes of Pierrot must have had an iron patience. Definitely would watch him conspire in a language I don't understand again.

Pinocchio (2009)

Every time I make one of these posts I think back to this miniseries and EVERY TIME I forgot how utterly ridiculous this Mangiafuoco is. A mixture of Stromboli, an aged rockstar and a bondage enthusiast, with such ridiculous sound effects given to his voice it's a wonder Rai didn't laugh the director out of the room. At least they realized they could only do so much with the terrible CGI Italy is infamous for and made a miniature set for him to traipse around instead of trying to fake a giant man. Best Mangiafuoco if you want to laugh for a solid ten minutes.

And that's it! I hope I exhausted all you needed to know, anon!

#anonymous #pinocchio #as usual enjoy my obscene 2009 screencaps #there are things in the disney movie that make my pinocchio enthusiast heart burn in rage #but not stromboli #stromboli is PERSONAL #as an italian and as a decent person

[kiragecko]

DC Sidekick Age References

Here’s a dump of all the references I’ve found. Know I’m missing a lot, and quite a few were found on other sites that didn’t give me the most precise info.

If you know of anything else, can correct a mistake you see, or want to discuss comic book aging - please send me an ask, message, or reblog!

?? - means I don’t know where the info is from, “quotes” are direct copies of the wording in the comic

-

?? Parents died when Bruce was 8

Detective Comics #27 (May 1939) – Batman introduced

Detective Comics #38 (Apr 1940)  – Dick is (8 when parents killed/9 when Robin) 12 when he becomes Robin, it's Bruce's 3rd year as Batman

More Fun Comics 73 (Nov 1941) – Green Arrow Introduced

1962 - JLA formed

1964 – Dick teams up with Wally and Garth

Teen Titans 1 (Jan-Feb 1966) – Teen Titans form, Donna is introduced (all 5 are 14ish?)

Detective 359 (Jan 1967) – Babs introduced, has PhD, has graduated

Batman #217 (Dec 1969) – Dick graduates high school, enrolls in University (starts 3 months later)

1971 - Roy discovered using drugs by Ollie and Hal in a drug den (he was trading arrows for drugs), retcon has Wally and Dick discovering him at tower and making him promise to get help

Justice League 116 (Mar-Apr 1975) Charley Parker is 16

Batman Family 10 (Mar-Apr 1977) – Dick is teenager, Babs is 25

Teen Titans 53 (Feb 1978) – Dick, Wally, Donna, Vic all started college at same time

DC Special Series: The Flash Spectacular (May 1978) – Wally graduates high school

New Teen Titans 1 (Nov 1980) – Raven forms New Titans, Gar is 16 during run

New Teen Titans 2 (Dec 1980) – Slade meets team, Grant dies

1981 - Dick drops out of university after 1 semester, he never really was interested

New Teen Titans 20 (June 1982) – Vic turns 19, Donna already is

Tales of the New Teen Titans 2 (July 1982) – Raven turned 18 just before forming Titans

Batman #357 (Mar 1983) – Jason’s first appearance

Detective Comics #526 (May 1983) – Bruce adopts Jason, Dick is there and approving

New Teen Titans 34 (Aug 1983) – Terra turns 16

Batman #368 (Feb 1984) – Dick gives Jason the Robin costume, Jason becomes Robin

Blue Devil(84) – Eddie is 11/12

Tales of the Teen Titans (May 1984) – Joey introduced, Author describes him as 17?

New Teen Titans #39 (Feb 1984) – Dick stops being Robin, Wally quits being a superhero/the team

Tales of the Teen Titans 50 (Feb 1985) – Terry and Donna's wedding (she got married while 19)

New Teen Titans 10 (July 1985) – Kole says she's at least 18

Crisis on Infinite Earths 7 (Oct 1985) – Supergirl dies in Superman’s arms after mostly destroying the Anti-Monitor, who has to flee reality

New Teen Titans 18 (Mar 1986) – Dick turns 20 (“Dick Grayson celebrates his birthday away from home with a traditional Tamaranean feast.” (While sulking because Kory got space-married))

New Teen Titans 20 (May 1986) – Roy locates baby Lian, Terry Long is 29

?? Roy is 22(when he gets Lian)

Batman #404 - Batman Year One (Feb 1987) – Bruce is 25, spent 12 years training, became Batman at 26, Barbara Gordon is pregnant, her and Jim move to Gotham

Detective Comics #571 (Feb 1987) – we see Bruce’s fear gas induced vision of Jason’s tombstone (birth: 1974 – death: 1986, so he’d be 12)

Secret Origins 13 (April 87) – 15 years ago, it was Dick’s 5th birthday. Soon after tenth birthday, parents are killed. [Set during New TT 18])

Batman #409 (July 1987) – Jason becomes Robin (In Detective Comics, Jason has been Robin the whole time, but is still being wwritten with Pre-Crisis personality)

Flash 1 (June 1987) – Wally turns 20

New Teen Titans Ann 3 (Nov 1987) – Danny Chase is 13 and introduced

Batman #416 (Feb 1988) – Dick in Gotham, meets the new Robin on patrol. Confronts Bruce later, says he was ‘fired’ less than a year ago (since then he was briefly in college), makes Bruce admit he missed him. Dick finds Jason again, expose the drug dealers, and Dick gives Jason his old costume (symbolically, since Jason already has one) and a phone number, Dick was Robin for 6 years

Batman #427 (Winter 1988) – Jason dies

Batman #436, Batman: Year Three (Aug 1989) – 2 years since Dick stopped being Bruce’s sidekick (When he became Nightwing? Or when he quit?), parents died 10 years earlier

Batman #441, A Lonely Place of Dying (Nov 1989) – Tim 13, was 7 when Dick’s parents died

Robin #1 (Jan 1991) – Tim debuts as Robin

New Titans 84 (March 1992) – Joey dies

Deathstroke, the Terminator #15 (Oct 1992) – Rose introduced

Team Titans 3 (Nov 1992) – Robert Long is born

Adventures of Superman 500 (June 1993) – Kon appears and escapes from Cadmus with Newboy Legion, John Henry Irons first appearance, Eradicator and Cyborg Superman also appear for first time

Batman: BTAS: Robin’s Reckoning (1993) - 'Richard 'Dick' Grayson: Age 10'

Detective Comics 668 (Nov 1993) – Tim gets license (because dad is disabled) even though he hasn’t turned 16 yet, gets beat up by Jean-Paul

Flash 92 (July 1994) – Bart aged to 14

?? Shortly after Knight’s End – Tim is 15 and in the 10th grade

Flash 0 (Oct 1994) – Wally is 23

Damage 1(94) – Grant is 16

Deathstroke, The Terminator Annual 4 (Aug 1995) – Rose is 14, “What would that do to a kid? A fourteen-year-old girl whose father is an assassin she’s never met?”

Wonder Woman 105(95) – Cassie is 14

Tempest 1(96) – Garth spends many months in other dimension

Aquaman 20 (May 1996) – Garth aged 3-4 years in other dimension, now older than other Titans

Teen Titans 1 (Oct 1996) – Argent, Risk, Joto, Prysm all turn 16(they were conceived by seed things on same day)

Superboy Annual 2 – to Kon: “Happy birthday, Kid - - number one in a long successful series, we hope.” “He will effectively remain sixteen years old - - forever!”

Green Lantern 82(97) – Robert Long is 3

Wonder Woman 121(97) – Terry and Robert die

Secret Origins Giant 1(98) – Bart is “Three. Fifteen. Depends.”, “you’re almost 15, Tim.”

Titans 5(99) – Donna is 23

Titans(99) – Lian is 4

Sins of Youth(99) – Kon 16, aging normally again

Aquaman 63 (Jan 2000) – Future Garth tells granddaughter Donna about Cerdian being born (think this is his weird birth issue)

Wonder Woman Secret Files (2002) – „Wonder Girl is a precocious outgoing 15-year-old named Cassandra „Cassie“ Sandsmark.“

Bruce Wayne: Murderer (2002) – Oracle says Tim is 15

Batgirl #37 (April 2003) – “Cain said ... today was ... my birthday.”

Batgirl #39 (June 2003) – “I see an eighteen-year-old girl, who’s out of her depth.” (Babs about Cass)

Robin #116 (Sept 2003) – Dana: “Oh, I’m so glad we’ll all be together on Thursday ... !” Tim: “Why? What’s Thursday?” Jack: “Yeah. What’s Thursday?” Dana: “Wait a minute – seriously? Tim: “Yeah. Tell. Us.” Dana: “It’s nothing – never mind. Just leave your schedules open for a nice family dinner.”| Jack: “Dana, what’s – “ Dana: “Shh! Thursday ...  the 19th of July ... ?” Jack: “Um ... oh! Right!” | Steph: “So – Thursday!! Are you excited? Got any ideas for it, yet? ... Tim ... ?” [Tim is asleep.] | [Ives and Steph come over, with pizza that says “Happy B-Day Tim.”] Ives: “Sixteen spankings – get that boy up!!” | Dana says: “I remember when I was in 11th grade.” | he also gets the first ‘clue’ for Bruce’s ‘birthday present.’

Teen Titans 1 (Nov 2003) – Gar is 19, Is this Joey’s return?? (He’s puppeting Slade)

Teen Titans ½ (2004) – Rose’s early years, with a ‘6 years ago’ flashback, she was raised in a brothel her mom ran, tutored, never allowed the outside world, but had relationships with kids her age

Detective Comics #790 (Mar 2004) – Jason’s 18th birthday “he would have been 18 today”

Teen Titans 8 (April 2004) – Raven looks 'barely older' than Cassie

TEEN TITANS #1/2 [2004]: The flashback panels totally sync up with my age theories; Flash to 10 years ago: Dick Grayson’s parents die. Flash to 6 years ago: Rose Wilson is schooled at home by her mother, Lili. Flash to 5 years ago: Ravager I is killed. Flash to 3 years ago: Slade is forced to kill Jericho. Flash to 2 years ago: Cadmus attempts to clone Superman. Flash to 18 months ago: Rose deals with the death of her mother. Flash to one week ago: Bart Allen is shot by Slade.

Identity Crisis 4 (Dec 2004) –(Tim still 16)

Green Arrow 47(05) – Mia is 17

Return of Donna Troy 3(05) – Cassie barely 16

Nightwing: Year One(05) – Dick is 26

Batgirl #65 (Aug 2005) – Cass decides to figure out if Shiva is her mom, Jason and Cass roughly the same age

Flash(05/06) – Wally is 26

?? Robin #136 – Tim still 16 ???

Detective Comics #868 (Oct 2010)– Kate is 32 years old??

One Year Later(Mar 06)

Flash 1(06) – Bart 4 years older(20?)

Blue Beetle 2 (June 2006) – Find out Jaime was in space/a pocket dimension for One Year Later

?? Just prior to 52 (July 2006-July 2007)– told Tim is 17 (long before he’s also  17 in Red Robin, 52 is 1 year long)

Teen Titans 42 (Feb 2007) – Eddie is 17

Final Crisis: Legion of 3 Worlds 3-4 (Apr-June 2009) – Bart and Kon back, same as when died

Batman 677 (July 2008) – Batman over 30

Batman: Battle for the Cowl (May-July 2009) – Damian is 10, Ends with Dick and Damian becoming Batman and Robin

Brave & The Bold 2 (May 2007) – Kara is 17, “You have food in the refrigerator older than her, Hal. Who are you, Ollie? No bad thoughts. She’s seventeen.”

Batgirl #1 (Oct 2009) – Steph starting college

Batgirl #7 (Apr 2010) - Damian is "what happens when you work with a 10-year-old."

Red Robin #12 (July 2010) – Tim spent “a few months” looking for evidence before returning to Gotham, becomes emancipated minor

Detective Comics #871 (Jan 2011)– Mention that Dick and Babs went to prom together

Red Robin #25 (Sept 2011) – Tim “and you are only 17”

The Batman Files (Oct 2014) – Jason was 15 at death (seen on death certificate)

?? Rebirth Young Justice series – Cassie: “didn’t mean to end up back in high school feeling - - like I did back when I went to high school.” Later, she says she’s in Metropolis “Working. Going to school in the fall.” So she’s probably starting college.

?? Bart in some Rebirth comic: “Am I six? Am I nineteen? That’s a really freaky thing, right?”

?? At some point: Donna says shes a little older than Kyle

#gecko's lists #dc comics #teen titans #young justice #about 3/4 of these can be compiled into something that makes sence #*sense #but choosing which 3/4 is tricky

[digimonascending]

Profile for Lonnie McMillan and Dendromon. More information under the break:

Lonnie Full Name: Lonnie McMillan

Age: 17

Hair: Ginger

Eyes: Golden

Height: 6'2" Partner: Dendromon

Personality

Raised on long-past stories of adventures and monsters, is it really any wonder that Lonnie leapt into the life of a Digimon tamer with an immense, and a potentially foolhardy gusto. Not that it's overly unusual for her, as she has the tendency to tackle every one of life's problems with a wide grin on her face and a sense of wonder and enthusiasm that seems unquenchable. Inherently approachable, friendly, utmostly noble and heroic to the nth degree, Lonnie could almost have been purpose-made for the life of a tamer. A fact which causes a few of her friends and family much exasperation.

Of course there is more to this new life than just the will to win and live to the utmost, a fact of which Lonnie is very aware, although she does struggle to keep up with some of the more involved aspects of life. While not unintelligent by any means, she has a tendency to blindly speak her mind, a hardheadedness which constantly leads her into trouble, and a severely impulsive streak which has been passed down through the McMillan family for generations. If she's around, you can be certain that she will cause trouble, whether intentional or not.

But no matter the many, many blunders she has wrought in the past, there is no denying the sincere level of heart that Lonnie brings to everything she does and everyone she comes across. No matter how bad things get, she will always remain standing, and if need be she will pull her friends through the toughest times with her bare hands. It's just who she is. She is a hero, through and through, and she's gonna save the world.

Family

Carrie McMillan - Mother

Anna McMillan - Younger Half-sister

Sian McMillan - Younger Half-sister

~

Dendromon

Pronunciation: DEN-droh-mon

Name origin: Dendrobatidae, family of amphibians containing poison dart frogs

Family: Dragon's Roar, Jungle Troopers

Type: Salamander

Stage: Rookie

Attribute: Data

Height: 3'1" Partner: Lonnie Personality Dendromon appears to be a master of being in the wrong place at the wrong time. She's clumsy on her feet, unsure with her words, and though she tries to maintain an air of confidence and authority in her own life, she in fact has a passiveness to her that leads her into many of the situations that stress her out so much, be they wild Digimon, overenthused toddlers, or the terrifying whims of her own beloved partner.

With the amount she ends up going through it's rather a wonder that Dendromon is as compliant as she is, despite her need to complain about everything that she is being forced to endure right now please Lonnie can you just think for once in your life. She does trust her partner to the fullest, truly believing the best of people even when they do lead her into difficult situations. But more than that is her own streak of heroism, or perhaps of duty; a need to do right by the people she loves and trusts. No matter how embarrassing or how dire the situation gets, she won't back down facing every new challenge dead on, on her own head be it.

A puppet to her partner's brilliant ideas, possibly. Maybe more than is healthy for her. But when it counts, Dendromon shares every bit of Lonnie's heroic streak and need to do right by the world. After so many years of watching a world burn, isn't it only fair to try and make things right for the next generation.

Attacks:

Acid Arc - Dendromon emits an acidic flame from her hand claws and slashes at her enemy, the flame shooting out as a spinning projectile

Searing Skin - Dendromon's palms heat up to hundreds of degrees, and she grabs or swipes at her enemy, any contact with her skin causing instant burns

~

Spawmon

Pronunciation: SPORR-mon

Name origin: Frogspawn, eggs of many aquatic animals including amphibians

Type: Slime

Stage: Fresh

Attribute: None

Height: 0'7"

Attacks:

Bubbles - Spawmon emits a slow string of bubbles from her membrane

~

Axolomon

Pronunciation: Ack-ZOLL-oh-mon

Name origin: Axolotl, salamander species native to Mexico

Family: Jungle Troopers

Type: Tadpole

Stage: In-Training

Attribute: None

Height: 1'0"

Attacks

Burn Bubble - Axolomon puffs up her body and blows out a glowing, mildly corrosive bubble

~

And it's time to introduce the Chasm partners all proper-like

New display sheets here, as you might have noticed. I wanted to try and make a format which was a) clear, b) looked nice and c) meant I could add later forms/additional parts at a later point without it getting stupidly big. We'll see how these ones go; if they're useful I'll try and keep using them for the rest of Ascending.

Also, additional profile artwork for the tamers! This is partially inspired by Reboot and my desire to try different costumes (and show off Lonnie's definitely-totally-deliberate complete lack of fashion sense), but also I wanted to try some extra expressions before running straight into screenshots. It's fun to doodle.

Also, you don't want to know what the reference note I had for that last expression was. 0_o

Basically Chasm is significantly bigger, more complicated and more ambitious than anything I've tried before on any scale. We can only hope it pays off.

And also we meet Lonnie's long-suffering partner. I am going to be updating this sheet as the story goes on, so keep an eye out for new evolutions. 8)

Not much else I can really add here, other than...well...I'm back for good this time.

Fribbit.

#digimon ascending #digimon chasm #digimon fdd #digimon fanseries #digimon oc #digimon fanfiction #digifake #character design #profile art

[lunartonehana]

Pokemon Rejuvenation V13 Live Reaction Thread 10/10+Final Thoughts

Spoilers for V13 under cut

Geara >:(

Did I ever tell yall that i despise the haunted field

Geara’s team(Krook,Para,Grimm,Geng,Chan,Clef)

Hmmm

This fight isn’t particularly hard my problem is that Gengar can hit very hard and the clefairy is annoying ugh

what the fuck????

what the fuck is up with the parasect???

Maybe he is hard

I soft resetted so many times for the fight

Also ig u can’t overwrite and destroy fields anymore???i tried to use misty terrain because the hypnosis was driving me insane but it was just added onto the field

i really don’t like that

Its morning now

I beat him because I got a crit on the clefable :)

Still hated that battle

Okie saki time

wtf is up with this field 🗿

Remember when I said the hardest fight so far in v13 was the Cella battle

Yea

Not anymore

Saki’s field is busted and since we can’t really remove fields temporarily w/ type terrains…i’m stuck in it…

Was Terra in reborn fought on this field…?I forgot how I beat her it’s been years

So the Glitch Field

Yes i’m taking notes

Removes the physical/special split

Meaning physical and special moves are based off of typing now

Special attack is based off of either spatk or spdef,depending on the larger one

Wonder room can kinda make things easier

Dragon types are useless

New day

Saki’s pissing me off and this is kinda an unfair fight since changing the fields doesn’t work anymore

I don’t care if this is cowardly but i am gonna cheese saki through destiny bond+quick claw+wonder room mismagius

First try with cheesing i made it to her last mon(corviknight) but i accidentally ran out of potions…somehow

Took 3 tries with cheesing but I beat her

Not proud of it but i wanna finish the main story

GROUP HUG

Rhodea :(

Oh shit crescent

Crescent deserves better

Ooo Xenpurgis is an ub

Rune mvp

Oh damn we’re just attacking team xen in v14 cool cool

Cool done with the main story

Okay I am going to a little review for this version. Overall I think I would give this chapter a B+ or a B.

My favorite path without a doubt was Erin+Kanon’s route. I loved exploring Angie’s mansion and I adored the atmosphere of the place itself. The map and tilesets were just really well done. I used Erin’s team without the Interceptor…well intervening with our pkmn and I felt like the difficulty was just right. I stuggled but all I needed to do was change my strategy. The atmosphere with the maids and the ost complemented the environment so well. Erin was great and she’s probably a contender for one of my favorites in the game…ignoring Aelita of course. The path also added a lot onto the Vitus situation and what interactions might happen in the endgame since we still don’t know his whereabouts.

Next would have to be either Aelita or the Player’s path. Personally, the path’s were kinda along the same in terms of ranking but I feel like their was more that happened in the player’s path that personally felt more relevant. It was nice seeing the player’s past self and their history with Crescent back in Miera…which begs the question, how old is Crescent??? Geniunely what is the timeline between the events at Miera with the player and the player heading to Gearen…Also thank you developers for not making Crescent have a past romantic relationship with the player…I have seen this happen too many times in other games and shows. Let them just be besties. Looking back at it, this part was kinda dialogue heavy but that problem is alleviated from the puzzles and good interactions in both routes.

The only problem I felt is that…imo Rune left as soon as she came. Ig since we found out she’s the puppet master she was always there but…i felt like we should’ve seen her as Rune just a bit longer…Also the twist regarding her and Huey’s background also kinda felt like it should’ve been alluded to earlier(unless they did hint to it earlier and i just forgot) because it didn’t feel like much. Still a good route tho, a solid B.

My least favorite was Melia+Venam+Ren’s route. I kinda felt like this route was shorter than the other one’s looking back at it. Gameplay wise there wasn’t much happening there save for the battle with Cassandra. The underground area also wasn’t really special overall. There was some interesting tidbits regarding the Archetype and the Garufans but it hasn’t really payed off yet in the story. The trio’s interactions were just okay, I liked their interactions in Goldenwood but their dialogue in the underground place was meh. Though I loved Nim and I am happy to know she has changed sides, I can’t wait to see more of her.

The developers knocked it out of the park with this version! I only talked about the additions to the main story but I went back to earlier places that got upgraded and woa Sheridan and Goldenrood look phenomenal! Route 3 and Phasial cave got changed and they look superb. I’ll miss Route 4 but the reservoir looks amazing so far and I am impressed with how they are handling the rift dens! Also making gigantamax mons function like mega evolutions is genius. Also the aevium forms are really nice and my favorite is the alolan mareep that I can’t get :)))))))))))

Also I started over to see changes made with the beginning cutscene and man the ship looks better and the additions with the full artwork of characters is great. I want to play this game again in the future(probably during winter break since I am going to be busy for awhile) on normal mode with a monotype team but I haven’t decided which one yet :o

That’s it with main story additions, I am going to have to go back and catch any new pokemon added in the game.

#pokemon #pokemon rejuvenation #pokemon fangame #pokemon rejuvenation spoilers #hana plays pokemon rejuvenation

[bornofbloodandwater]

*URL MUSE PLAYLIST.

create a playlist that encompasses your muse using only the letters of your url. ( multi-muse — specify which muse(s) each song makes you think of. ) repost, do not reblog.

B - Beautiful Crime - Tamer

O - Only The Truth - The Last Shadow Puppets

R - R U Mine - Arctic Monkeys

N - Nothing Gets Crossed Out - Bright Eyes

O - Out To Sea - Ólafur Arnalds

F - Familiar - Agnes Obel

B - Beauty - The Shivers

L - Lover, You Should Have Come Over - Jeff Buckley

O - Out of the Black - Royal Blood

O - Only Angel - Harry Styles (pls don’t judge me i asked my sister and its a great tune)

D - Didn’t Know What I Was In For - Better Oblivion Community Centre

A - All the Burning Lovers - Isaac Gracie

N - Night After Night - Laura Marling

D - Deadly Doll - Jessie Jo Stark

W - When You Break - Bear’s Den

A - Agape - Bear’s Den

T - This Is The Last Time - The National

E - Erase/Replace - Foo Fighters

R - Run for Those Hills, Babe - Tom Rosenthal

TAGGED BY (STOLEN FROM); @vilestblood

TAGGING; @mettleborn @sunbentsky @suresaint @sanguisvirginis @magioffire  

#{some of them are ship songs #some are just Xio #some are things she might listen to} #;queue will answer the call

[papermoonloveslucy]

TOO MANY TELEVISION SETS

October 14, 1949

"Too Many Television Sets” (aka “Liz and George Order a Television Set” aka “Television”) is episode #58 of the radio series MY FAVORITE HUSBAND broadcast on October 14, 1949.

This was the sixth episode of the second season of MY FAVORITE HUSBAND. There were 43 new episodes, with the season ending on June 25, 1950.

Synopsis ~ Liz can't get George interested in buying a television set, until they spend an evening at the Atterburys, who have one. With his interest piqued, George arranges one be sent over on trial. Little does he know Liz has done the same thing - as have the Atterbury’s!  

“My Favorite Husband” was based on the novels Mr. and Mrs. Cugat, the Record of a Happy Marriage (1940) and Outside Eden (1945) by Isabel Scott Rorick, which had previously been adapted into the film Are Husbands Necessary? (1942). “My Favorite Husband” was first broadcast as a one-time special on July 5, 1948. Lucille Ball and Lee Bowman played the characters of Liz and George Cugat, and a positive response to this broadcast convinced CBS to launch “My Favorite Husband” as a series. Bowman was not available Richard Denning was cast as George. On January 7, 1949, confusion with bandleader Xavier Cugat prompted a name change to Cooper. On this same episode Jell-O became its sponsor. A total of 124 episodes of the program aired from July 23, 1948 through March 31, 1951. After about ten episodes had been written, writers Fox and Davenport departed and three new writers took over – Bob Carroll, Jr., Madelyn Pugh, and head writer/producer Jess Oppenheimer. In March 1949 Gale Gordon took over the existing role of George's boss, Rudolph Atterbury, and Bea Benaderet was added as his wife, Iris. CBS brought “My Favorite Husband” to television in 1953, starring Joan Caulfield and Barry Nelson as Liz and George Cooper. The television version ran two-and-a-half seasons, from September 1953 through December 1955, running concurrently with “I Love Lucy.” It was produced live at CBS Television City for most of its run, until switching to film for a truncated third season filmed (ironically) at Desilu and recasting Liz Cooper with Vanessa Brown.

MAIN CAST

Lucille Ball (Liz Cooper) was born on August 6, 1911 in Jamestown, New York. She began her screen career in 1933 and was known in Hollywood as ‘Queen of the B’s’ due to her many appearances in ‘B’ movies. With Richard Denning, she starred in a radio program titled “My Favorite Husband” which eventually led to the creation of “I Love Lucy,” a television situation comedy in which she co-starred with her real-life husband, Latin bandleader Desi Arnaz. The program was phenomenally successful, allowing the couple to purchase what was once RKO Studios, re-naming it Desilu. When the show ended in 1960 (in an hour-long format known as “The Lucy-Desi Comedy Hour”) so did Lucy and Desi’s marriage. In 1962, hoping to keep Desilu financially solvent, Lucy returned to the sitcom format with “The Lucy Show,” which lasted six seasons. She followed that with a similar sitcom “Here’s Lucy” co-starring with her real-life children, Lucie and Desi Jr., as well as Gale Gordon, who had joined the cast of “The Lucy Show” during season two. Before her death in 1989, Lucy made one more attempt at a sitcom with “Life With Lucy,” also with Gordon.

Richard Denning (George Cooper) was born Louis Albert Heindrich Denninger Jr., in Poughkeepsie, New York. When he was 18 months old, his family moved to Los Angeles. Plans called for him to take over his father's garment manufacturing business, but he developed an interest in acting. Denning enlisted in the US Navy during World War II. He is best known for his  roles in various science fiction and horror films of the 1950s. Although he teamed with Lucille Ball on radio in “My Favorite Husband,” the two never acted together on screen. While “I Love Lucy” was on the air, he was seen on another CBS TV series, “Mr. & Mrs. North.” From 1968 to 1980 he played the Governor on “Hawaii 5-0″, his final role. He died in 1998 at age 84.

Gale Gordon (Rudolph Atterbury) had worked with Lucille Ball on “The Wonder Show” on radio in 1938. One of the front-runners to play Fred Mertz on “I Love Lucy,” he eventually played Alvin Littlefield, owner of the Tropicana, during two episodes in 1952. After playing a Judge in an episode of “The Lucy-Desi Comedy Hour” in 1958, he would re-team with Lucy for all of her subsequent series’: as Theodore J. Mooney in ”The Lucy Show”; as Harrison Otis Carter in “Here’s Lucy”; and as Curtis McGibbon on "Life with Lucy.” Gordon died in 1995 at the age of 89.

Bea Benadaret (Iris Atterbury) was considered the front-runner to be cast as Ethel Mertz but when “I Love Lucy” was ready to start production she was already playing a similar role on TV’s “The George Burns and Gracie Allen Show” so Vivian Vance was cast instead. On “I Love Lucy” she was cast as Lucy Ricarodo’s spinster neighbor, Miss Lewis, in “Lucy Plays Cupid” (ILL S1;E15) in early 1952. Later, she was a success in her own show, “Petticoat Junction” as Shady Rest Hotel proprietress Kate Bradley. She starred in the series until her death in 1968.

Ruth Perrott (Katie, the Maid) was also later seen on “I Love Lucy.” She first played Mrs. Pomerantz, a member of the surprise investigating committee for the Society Matrons League in “Pioneer Women” (ILL S1;E25), as one of the member of the Wednesday Afternoon Fine Arts League in “Lucy and Ethel Buy the Same Dress” (ILL S3;E3), and also played a nurse when “Lucy Goes to the Hospital” (ILL S2;E16). She died in 1996 at the age of 96.

Bob LeMond (Announcer) also served as the announcer for the pilot episode of “I Love Lucy”. When the long-lost pilot was finally discovered in 1990, a few moments of the opening narration were damaged and lost, so LeMond – fifty years later – recreated the narration for the CBS special and subsequent DVD release.

GUEST CAST

Jay Novello (Joe Beckett, the Atterbury’s Neighbor) would appear on “I Love Lucy” as superstitious Mr. Merriweather in “The Seance" (ILL S1;E7), nervous Mr. Beecher in “The Sublease” (ILL S3;E31), and Mario the gondolier in “The Visitor from Italy” (ILL S6;E5). He also appeared on two episodes of “The Lucy Show,” but dapper Novello is probably best remembered for playing Mayor Lugatto on “McHale’s Navy” in 1965.

Wally Maher (Mr. Trimble) appeared on radio as the title character in the series “The Adventures of Michael Shayne, Private Detective”. In 1947 he appeared on radio with Lucille Ball in “Dark Corner”. Earlier in 1949, he was heard on “My Favorite Husband” in “Vacation Time.” He was a regular on “Let George Do It” and “Lineup” and was frequently heard on “The Cavalcade of America” and “Lux Radio Theatre.” Maher passed away in December 1951, only 43 years old.    

Although the original Michael Shayne, the role was later played by Richard Denning (George Cooper). 

Peter Leeds (TV Deliveryman) was born in Bayonne, NJ, and will also be heard on “My Favorite Husband in “Mother In-Law” in November 1949 and “Dance Lessons” in June 1950. He will be seen as the Reporter questioning the Maharincess of Franistan in “The Publicity Agent” (ILL S1;E31). He starred with Lucy in the films The Long, Long Trailer (1953) and The Facts of Life (1960) with Bob Hope. Coincidentally, he also appeared in “Lucy and Bob Hope” (ILL S6;E1) as well as an episode of “Here’s Lucy” in 1971.

EPISODE

ANNOUNCER: “As we look in on the Coopers, dinner is over. George Cooper is in the living room reading the paper. Liz Cooper is in the kitchen talking to Katie, the maid.”

Liz tells Katie that she has a plan to get George to buy her a television set. She is going to hold up a big glass pie plate in front of her face and pretend like she’s a television wrestler.  

LIZ: “Do I look like television?” KATIE: “Well your face is all wavy and distorted.” LIZ: “I look like television alright.”

Liz enters the living room with the pie plate in front of her face, but George thinks she is a washing machine. 

Lucille Ball actually voiced a washing machine named Lina for a Westinghouse industrial film titled “Ellis in Freedomland” (1952).  In 1958, she hid inside a washing machine at the end of “Lucy Buys Westinghouse”, another industrial film for the appliance manufacturer. 

In 1952′s “Lucy Does a TV Commercial” (ILL S1;E30), Lucy Ricardo dispenses with the pie plate and disembowels her television set to look like she’s on the air!  Like George, Ricky isn’t buying it. 

George guesses that Liz is supposed to be a sailor looking out of a port hole, but warns her that he is not going to buy a television set, effectively ending the conversation. Liz says she is a social pariah because she doesn’t have a television set. 

LIZ: “I never know who won the fights or what Kukla and Fran are doing to Ollie.” 

“Kukla, Fran, and Ollie” was a children’s television show created by Burr Tillstrom that aired from 1947 to 1957. Kukla and Ollie were puppets and actress Fran Allison interacted with them. The show won a 1949 Peabody Award and went on to win two Emmys. 

George suggests Liz read the newspaper or listen to the radio instead. 

LIZ: “Television is taking the place of the newspaper.” GEORGE: “It is, huh? Well, I’d like to see you wrap the garbage in a television set!”

Before the advent of plastic garbage bags, food waste from the kitchen was generally wrapped in old newspapers before being deposited in the trash bin outside the home. 

LIZ: “Every house on the block has an aerial. Our house looks positively naked.” 

Before cable television and internet streaming, homes received television broadcast signals via an antenna (aerial) on the roof. In “Lucy Puts Up a TV Antenna” (TLS S1;E9) Lucy Carmichael decides to save the cost of an installation and erect the aerial herself - to disastrous results. 

George agrees to buy the aerial - but not the television set.

LIZ: “Oh, great, that’ll fool everybody. Before we go out at night we can peel onions so our eyes will be bloodshot!” 

Liz asks George to buy him an apple box instead. 

LIZ: “If I have to watch it [TV] through a store window, at least I’ll have something to sit on.”

Before television sets became affordable to the general public, it was not uncommon to find people gathered in front of an appliance store window to view it from the street. 

Liz answers the telephone. It is Iris, who brags about her brand new television set, which was delivered the day before. 

IRIS: “I did my knitting last night with Ed Wynn; I had breakfast with Tex and Jinx; and this afternoon I took a bath with Hopalong Cassidy!” 

“The Ed Wynn Show” was a variety show broadcast from September 22,1949 to July 4, 1950 on the CBS Television Network. Comedian and former vaudevillian Ed Wynn was the star of the program. Lucille Ball and Desi Arnaz made their television debut as a couple on the show on Christmas Eve 1949, just a few weeks after this episode of “My Favorite Husband”.

“Tex and Jinx” were Eugenia “Jinx” Falkenberg and her husband John “Tex” McCRary. The couple were popular radio hosts who began on television in January 1947. 

“Hopalong Cassidy” made the leap from books and movies to the small screen on June 24, 1949, kicking off the legacy of the Western on television. These were not new, but simply cut-down versions of the feature films that were in cinemas from 1935 to 1948. The film / TV series had William Boyd in the title role. A new TV series (also starring Boyd) with newly-filmed adventures, began  in 1952.  

Iris’s comment about “taking a bath with Hopalong Cassidy” gets a big reaction from the “My Favorite Husband” studio audience not used to salacious innuendo. 

Iris comes up with an idea to help Liz convince George to buy her a television set. She invites the Coopers to come over, where their TV will be showing a football game. George will naturally see the joys of owning a TV and give in! 

Instead of Iris or Rudolph, the Atterbury’s front door is answered by their neighbor, Joe Beckett (Jay Novello), the local TVM (television moocher).  He says they just missed the big brawl!

GEORGE: “Mr. and Mrs. Atterbury?” JOE: “No. The Terrible Turk and Gorgeous George!” 

Wrestling matches were very popular on radio and early television, producing such colorful wrestlers as the Terrible Turk and Gorgeous George. George Raymond Wagner (1915–63), was known as Gorgeous George because of his long blonde hair. He was mentioned on “I Love Lucy” in “Pioneer Women” (ILL S1;E25) and “Ricky’s Movie Offer” (ILL S4;E6). In 1949, Republic Pictures released a film starring Gorgeous George. Laurence LeBell (1907-48) was known as Ali Alaba, The Terrible Turk, a name that was used by many wrestlers from the late 19th century onwards. He died in a car crash just weeks after this episode aired. 

Joe warns the Coopers not to sit behind Iris because they only have a ten inch screen. (Liz adds that Iris has a 16″ neck.) He advises that they visit the Schraders who watch “Pantomime Quiz” and serve sandwiches. The Andersons have beer, but you have to watch Western movies.

“Pantomime Quiz” (later titled “Stump the Stars”), was a television game show hosted by Mike Stokey. Running from 1947 to 1959, it has the distinction of being one of the few television series to air on all four TV networks during the Golden Age of Television. Lucille Ball is reported to have been on the series in December 1947, which would make it her television debut. 

George realizes Liz’s scheme but is insistent that he won’t watch television. When he hears a football game is on, however, he is intrigued, and decides to see “how bad it looks”. 

Liz’s incessant chattering makes Mr. Atterbury miss several key plays in the game. Mr. Beckett is back but then the picture suddenly goes black!  They have to imagine the game and the commercials. 

ANNOUNCER: “Liz’s plan to get George interested in television has blown a fuse.  Right now, Liz is on her way downtown to drown her sorrows by buying a new hat...”

On her way down Sheridan Boulevard, Liz stops in front of a Trimble’s Appliance Store to gaze at the television in the window. An elderly man stops to chat with her about the joys of television. He convinces her to go in and ask about buying one. Of course, he turns out to be Mr. Trimble himself. She tells him to send over a set on trial. 

Later that day, George finds himself in front of the same store, where he encounters the same elderly man!  Needless to say, Mr. Trimble is successful in selling another set to George!  Mr. Trimble thinks the address sounds familiar, but isn’t sure.

Still later, the Atterbury’s are doing the marketing when they stop in front of Trimble’s Appliance Store. Mr. Atterbury, already having a set, is convinced to send George Cooper. Mr. Trimble is now positive that he’s gotten the same address three times. He thinks he is being tricked and vows that he will only send over one TV set on trial, not three. 

After dinner, the Coopers decide to stay in for the evening. The doorbell rings. Unbeknownst to one another, they both are expecting a TV delivery, but instead, it is the Atterburys. A moment later the bell rings again and a deliveryman (and Mr. Beckett) is there with one new television set. Naturally, the Atterburys, Liz, and George, all think they are the ones who bought the set! 

The Atterburys think the Coopers are ungrateful and they decide to leave. Rudolph tries to take the TV set with him, but the set is damaged in the tussle.

LIZ: “You’re right Iris, this IS the television set you sent out!” 

This ending is reminiscent of when the Ricardos and Mertzes argue over who broke a TV set Fred and Ethel gave Lucy and Ricky as a gift. They, too, argue over ownership of the set, until it is irreparably damaged!

LUCY: “Look what happened to YOUR television set!” 

#My Favorite Husband #Television #1949 #Radio #Television Set #Pantomime Quiz #Lucille Ball #Richard Denning #Bea Benadaret #Ruth Perrott #Gale Gordon #Bob LeMond #Jay Novello #Peter Leeds #Mike stokey #Gorgeous George #The Terrible Turk #Hopalong Cassidy #Tex and Jinx #Ed Wynn #Kukla Fran and Ollie #Wally Maher

[swampusplanet]

@d-o-t-s

             SHREK

                                      Written by

                               William Steig & Ted Elliott

                                    SHREK                         Once upon a time there was a lovely                         princess. But she had an enchantment                         upon her of a fearful sort which could                         only be broken by love's first kiss.                         She was locked away in a castle guarded                         by a terrible fire-breathing dragon.                         Many brave knights had attempted to                         free her from this dreadful prison,                         but non prevailed. She waited in the                         dragon's keep in the highest room of                         the tallest tower for her true love                         and true love's first kiss. (laughs)                         Like that's ever gonna happen. What                         a load of - (toilet flush)

              Allstar - by Smashmouth begins to play. Shrek goes about his               day. While in a nearby town, the villagers get together to go               after the ogre.

              NIGHT - NEAR SHREK'S HOME

                                    MAN1                         Think it's in there?

                                    MAN2                         All right. Let's get it!

                                    MAN1                         Whoa. Hold on. Do you know what that                         thing can do to you?

                                    MAN3                         Yeah, it'll grind your bones for it's                         bread.

              Shrek sneaks up behind them and laughs.

                                    SHREK                         Yes, well, actually, that would be a                         giant. Now, ogres, oh they're much worse.                         They'll make a suit from your freshly                         peeled skin.

                                    MEN                         No!

                                    SHREK                         They'll shave your liver. Squeeze the                         jelly from your eyes! Actually, it's                         quite good on toast.

                                    MAN1                         Back! Back, beast! Back! I warn ya!                         (waves the torch at Shrek.)

              Shrek calmly licks his fingers and extinguishes the torch. The               men shrink back away from him. Shrek roars very loudly and long               and his breath extinguishes all the remaining torches until the               men are in the dark.

                                    SHREK                         This is the part where you run away.                         (The men scramble to get away. He laughs.)                         And stay out! (looks down and picks                         up a piece of paper. Reads.) "Wanted.                         Fairy tale creatures."(He sighs and                         throws the paper over his shoulder.)

              THE NEXT DAY

              There is a line of fairy tale creatures. The head of the guard               sits at a table paying people for bringing the fairy tale creatures               to him. There are cages all around. Some of the people in line               are Peter Pan, who is carrying Tinkerbell in a cage, Gipetto               who's carrying Pinocchio, and a farmer who is carrying the three               little pigs.

                                    GUARD                         All right. This one's full. Take it                         away! Move it along. Come on! Get up!

                                    HEAD GUARD                         Next!

                                    GUARD                         (taking the witch's broom) Give me that!                         Your flying days are over. (breaks the                         broom in half)

                                    HEAD GUARD                         That's 20 pieces of silver for the witch.                         Next!

                                    GUARD                         Get up! Come on!

                                    HEAD GUARD                         Twenty pieces.

                                    LITTLE BEAR                         (crying) This cage is too small.

                                    DONKEY                         Please, don't turn me in. I'll never                         be stubborn again. I can change. Please!                         Give me another chance!

                                    OLD WOMAN                         Oh, shut up. (jerks his rope)

                                    DONKEY                         Oh!

                                    HEAD GUARD                         Next! What have you got?

                                    GIPETTO                         This little wooden puppet.

                                    PINOCCHIO                         I'm not a puppet. I'm a real boy. (his                         nose grows)

                                    HEAD GUARD                         Five shillings for the possessed toy.                         Take it away.

                                    PINOCCHIO                         Father, please! Don't let them do this!                         Help me!

              Gipetto takes the money and walks off. The old woman steps up               to the table.

                                    HEAD GUARD                         Next! What have you got?

                                    OLD WOMAN                         Well, I've got a talking donkey.

                                    HEAD GUARD                         Right. Well, that's good for ten shillings,                         if you can prove it.

                                    OLD WOMAN                         Oh, go ahead, little fella.

              Donkey just looks up at her.

                                    HEAD GUARD                         Well?

                                    OLD WOMAN                         Oh, oh, he's just...he's just a little                         nervous. He's really quite a chatterbox.                         Talk, you boneheaded dolt...

                                    HEAD GUARD                         That's it. I've heard enough. Guards!

                                    OLD WOMAN                         No, no, he talks! He does. (pretends                         to be Donkey) I can talk. I love to                         talk. I'm the talkingest damn thing                         you ever saw.

                                    HEAD GUARD                         Get her out of my sight.

                                    OLD WOMAN                         No, no! I swear! Oh! He can talk!

              The guards grab the old woman and she struggles with them. One               of her legs flies out and kicks Tinkerbell out of Peter Pan's               hands, and her cage drops on Donkey's head. He gets sprinkled               with fairy dust and he's able to fly.

                                    DONKEY                         Hey! I can fly!

                                    PETER PAN                         He can fly!

                                    3 LITTLE PIGS                         He can fly!

                                    HEAD GUARD                         He can talk!

                                    DONKEY                         Ha, ha! That's right, fool! Now I'm                         a flying, talking donkey. You might                         have seen a housefly, maybe even a superfly                         but I bet you ain't never seen a donkey                         fly. Ha, ha! (the pixie dust begins                         to wear off) Uh-oh. (he begins to sink                         to the ground.)

              He hits the ground with a thud.

                                    HEAD GUARD                         Seize him! (Donkey takes of running.)                         After him!

                                    GUARDS                         He's getting away! Get him! This way!                         Turn!

              Donkey keeps running and he eventually runs into Shrek. Literally.               Shrek turns around to see who bumped into him. Donkey looks scared               for a moment then he spots the guards coming up the path. He               quickly hides behind Shrek.

                                    HEAD GUARD                         You there. Ogre!

                                    SHREK                         Aye?

                                    HEAD GUARD                         By the order of Lord Farquaad I am authorized                         to place you both under arrest and transport                         you to a designated resettlement facility.

                                    SHREK                         Oh, really? You and what army?

              He looks behind the guard and the guard turns to look as well               and we see that the other men have run off. The guard tucks tail               and runs off. Shrek laughs and goes back about his business and               begins walking back to his cottage.

                                    DONKEY                         Can I say something to you? Listen,                         you was really, really, really somethin'                         back here. Incredible!

                                    SHREK                         Are you talkin' to...(he turns around                         and Donkey is gone) me? (he turns back                         around and Donkey is right in front                         of him.) Whoa!

                                    DONKEY                         Yes. I was talkin' to you. Can I tell                         you that you that you was great back                         here? Those guards! They thought they                         was all of that. Then you showed up,                         and bam! They was trippin' over themselves                         like babes in the woods. That really                         made me feel good to see that.

                                    SHREK                         Oh, that's great. Really.

                                    DONKEY                         Man, it's good to be free.

                                    SHREK                         Now, why don't you go celebrate your                         freedom with your own friends? Hmm?

                                    DONKEY                         But, uh, I don't have any friends. And                         I'm not goin' out there by myself. Hey,                         wait a minute! I got a great idea! I'll                         stick with you. You're mean, green,                         fightin' machine. Together we'll scare                         the spit out of anybody that crosses                         us.

              Shrek turns and regards Donkey for a moment before roaring very               loudly.

                                    DONKEY                         Oh, wow! That was really scary. If you                         don't mind me sayin', if that don't                         work, your breath certainly will get                         the job done, 'cause you definitely                         need some Tic Tacs or something, 'cause                         you breath stinks! You almost burned                         the hair outta my nose, just like the                         time...(Shrek covers his mouth but Donkey                         continues to talk, so Shrek removes                         his hand.) ...then I ate some rotten                         berries. I had strong gases leaking                         out of my butt that day.

                                    SHREK                         Why are you following me?

                                    DONKEY                         I'll tell you why. (singing) 'Cause                         I'm all alone, There's no one here beside                         me, My problems have all gone, There's                         no one to deride me, But you gotta have                         faith...

                                    SHREK                         Stop singing! It's no wonder you don't                         have any friends.

                                    DONKEY                         Wow. Only a true friend would be that                         cruelly honest.

                                    SHREK                         Listen, little donkey. Take a look at                         me. What am I?

                                    DONKEY                         (looks all the way up at Shrek) Uh ...really                         tall?

                                    SHREK                         No! I'm an ogre! You know. "Grab your                         torch and pitchforks." Doesn't that                         bother you?

                                    DONKEY                         Nope.

                                    SHREK                         Really?

                                    DONKEY                         Really, really.

                                    SHREK                         Oh.

                                    DONKEY                         Man, I like you. What's you name?

                                    SHREK                         Uh, Shrek.

                                    DONKEY                         Shrek? Well, you know what I like about                         you, Shrek? You got that kind of I-don't-care-what-nobody-thinks-of-me                         thing. I like that. I respect that,                         Shrek. You all right. (They come over                         a hill and you can see Shrek's cottage.)                         Whoa! Look at that. Who'd want to live                         in place like that?

                                    SHREK                         That would be my home.

                                    DONKEY                         Oh! And it is lovely! Just beautiful.                         You know you are quite a decorator.                         It's amazing what you've done with such                         a modest budget. I like that boulder.                         That is a nice boulder. I guess you                         don't entertain much, do you?

                                    SHREK                         I like my privacy.

                                    DONKEY                         You know, I do too. That's another thing                         we have in common. Like I hate it when                         you got somebody in your face. You've                         trying to give them a hint, and they                         won't leave. There's that awkward silence.                         (awkward silence) Can I stay with you?

                                    SHREK                         Uh, what?

                                    DONKEY                         Can I stay with you, please?

                                    SHREK                         (sarcastically) Of course!

                                    DONKEY                         Really?

                                    SHREK                         No.

                                    DONKEY                         Please! I don't wanna go back there!                         You don't know what it's like to be                         considered a freak. (pause while he                         looks at Shrek) Well, maybe you do.                         But that's why we gotta stick together.                         You gotta let me stay! Please! Please!

                                    SHREK                         Okay! Okay! But one night only.

                                    DONKEY                         Ah! Thank you! (he runs inside the cottage)

                                    SHREK                         What are you...? (Donkey hops up onto                         a chair.) No! No!

                                    DONKEY                         This is gonna be fun! We can stay up                         late, swappin' manly stories, and in                         the mornin' I'm makin' waffles.

                                    SHREK                         Oh!

                                    DONKEY                         Where do, uh, I sleep?

                                    SHREK                         (irritated) Outside!

                                    DONKEY                         Oh, well, I guess that's cool. I mean,                         I don't know you, and you don't know                         me, so I guess outside is best, you                         know. Here I go. Good night. (Shrek                         slams the door.) (sigh) I mean, I do                         like the outdoors. I'm a donkey. I was                         born outside. I'll just be sitting by                         myself outside, I guess, you know. By                         myself, outside. I'm all alone...there's                         no one here beside me...

              SHREK'S COTTAGE - NIGHT

              Shrek is getting ready for dinner. He sits himself down and lights               a candle made out of earwax. He begins to eat when he hears a               noise. He stands up with a huff.

                                    SHREK                         (to Donkey) I thought I told you to                         stay outside.

                                    DONKEY                         (from the window) I am outside.

              There is another noise and Shrek turns to find the person that               made the noise. He sees several shadows moving. He finally turns               and spots 3 blind mice on his table.

#lexxpocalypse

[aion-rsa]

Zack Snyder Adds to Batman Oral Sex Discourse

https://ift.tt/eA8V8J

This post contains spoilers of an existential nature.

“Do you think God stays in heaven because he too lives in fear of what he’s created?” Steve Buscemi’s Dr. Romero asks in the 2002 modern cinematic masterpiece, Spy Kids 2: Island of Lost Dreams.

It’s a valid question. One that I’ve been asking myself a lot this week as the “does Batman eat pussy” discourse continues across various social media platforms. It just got another shot in the arm from Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice and Justice League director Zack Snyder as it happens, because we live in a society. A society that refuses to let DC besmirch the good name of Batman when it comes to orally pleasuring someone, apparently. That’s where we draw a line in the sand and say “not today.”

Your response to seeing the words ‘Zack Snyder Adds to Batman Oral Sex Discourse’ grouped together in a headline may go one of several ways. “Of course he did” could be one, but “wait, what?” could certainly be another if you’ve been off the grid long enough this week to avoid the story so far.

In that case, here’s a little background that I’ll keep as brief as possible:

On Monday, Variety published an article with several superhero series creators discussing how their projects subvert the superhero genre. This included Harley Quinn co-creator Justin Halpern, who opened up a little about the kind of broader creative control they have on the show when they’re writing for DC villains.

“It’s incredibly gratifying and free to be using characters that are considered villains because you just have so much more leeway,” Halpern explained. “A perfect example of that is in this third season of Harley [when] we had a moment where Batman was going down on Catwoman. And DC was like, ‘You can’t do that. You absolutely cannot do that.’ They’re like, ‘Heroes don’t do that.’ So, we said, ‘Are you saying heroes are just selfish lovers?’ They were like, ‘No, it’s that we sell consumer toys for heroes. It’s hard to sell a toy if Batman is also going down on someone.’”

“Heroes don’t do that.” Well, the internet wasn’t about to let that slide (you can see some of the previous reactions to the notion right here if you like) and now, Snyder has added his own mic drop to the ongoing saga.

“Canon,” the ousted DCEU puppet-master typed into the Compose Tweet box today, adding an image of Batman and Catwoman going at it that he may or may not have spent the last few days drawing himself for all we know, before finally hitting Send.

Canon pic.twitter.com/rpPaRhVnQ8

— Zack Snyder (@ZackSnyder) June 18, 2021

Sweet Lord.

Harley Quinn boasts a strong voice cast includes Kaley Cuoco, Lake Bell, Alan Tudyk, Tony Hale, Ron Funches, Jason Alexander and J. B. Smoove. Season 3 is heading to HBO Max soon, but no release date has been made available just yet.

cnx.cmd.push(function() { cnx({ playerId: "106e33c0-3911-473c-b599-b1426db57530", }).render("0270c398a82f44f49c23c16122516796"); });

The post Zack Snyder Adds to Batman Oral Sex Discourse appeared first on Den of Geek.

from Den of Geek https://ift.tt/3gFrPep

#aion-rsa #Den of Geek

[hellsbellssinclub]

Broken Nest for Broken Birds. Part 3

Part 1/ Part 2/ Part 3

Read it on AO3

Summary:

Dick Grayson. Jason Todd. Timothea Drake. Stephanie Brown. Damian Wayne.

All five were Batman’s birds. All five are broken in their own little ways.

Bruce Wayne struggles to keep his family together while keeping his more volatile children calm and feeling secure within their place in the family. But that is not an easy thing to do when you have five young adults with all very different needs that demand to be met and when you have your own issues to deal with.

*Follows the different Robin’s and Bat’s stream of consciousness as they deal with their day to day lives and try to figure out how to be a family together.*

Part 3. Dick Grayson. Age 22.

Unresponsive. Broken like a marionette puppet without her strings. Timmy looked like she has watched a world implode and she could have done nothing to save it while she sat in a space shuttle, safely away from the blast zone.

He should have been there, seeing Timmy home after they had been on patrol together with B. He should have made sure she was safe and well and that she had not been alone, especially after Bruce gave her that lecture and half about safety and not taking risks.

But he had left her. Gone and followed Bruce’s Orders once again and now he was looking down at the broken and exhausted face of the girl who was his baby sister. It wasn’t hard to imagine her on the ground, head twisted in an unnatural angle with blood around her head like a fucked-up halo.

He let her fall. He didn’t catch her. He wasn’t there to catch her. He had gone back to the cave like a good little Robin because he was Ordered to and now…

Dick felt lost as to what to do. He had failed another sibling. He was a terrible big brother. First Jason and now Timothea. She hasn’t spoken a word since she finished screaming and was she would only drink the tea that Dick had Alfred make, the one that Jason suggested before he took off on his bike, when Dick placed the cup against her lips. He wished he could be there alongside Jason. Away from the Manor and away from the biting feeling in the back of his throat that this was his fault for not being there with Timmy when she had finished patrol.

Timmy wasn’t doing anything much now that she stopped screaming her lungs out. Just breathing little choked and wet sobs under her breath. No more tears. She was still shaking and giving full body shudders as if she was in a snowstorm or the biting rain that Gotham has in winter time. Shock, most likely. Or the grief. Timmy wasn’t that close to her Dad or Step Mum but Dick knew she loved them. Seeing them dead like that… no child should ever see their parents like that. It is mentally scaring and destroying.

He should know. He still hasn’t gotten over his parents. Neither has Bruce or anyone else he knows who have found or saw their parents get killed. The Superhero community is full of heroes who have lost their parents or watched them get murdered. They even had made different clubs so that people could go and talk about their trauma and shit.

Not that any of the other Bats have ever gone to one of those clubs. Bruce is too fucking scared to admit his trauma of seeing his parents get shot when he was eight and is always high-key terrified that someone is going to turn on him because his Post-Traumatic Hypervigilance makes him to paranoid to trust anyone with his feelings. Jason was still on the outs with pretty much everyone. No one was sure how to approach the former dead Robin and he wasn’t inclined to go to any of the clubs anyway. Jay never had been in his first life and the sentiment was the same in this one too.

Dick had gone once, when he was still Robin. He didn’t go back again for another meeting. He never wanted to talk about what happened with his parents and looking back he probably should have tried. Really, he blames Bruce for his lack of healthy coping skills because all he ever learned really while living in the Manor was that unless it was all about to explode and end up with him hurting himself or someone else than Bruce was going to avoid the hell out everything and pretend that it was all normal.

And Timmy, poor little Timmy never qualified for any of them before now. She was as normal as one could possibly get before all this. She was just an average kid who wanted to do some good and she did. But at what cost? She lost all three of her parents, has been shot, stabbed and has nearly been murdered so many times in the past three years and Dick wanted nothing more than to go back in time and to tell the small girl who had come up to him with hopeful eyes that she should get lost and forget everything. That it wasn’t worth it at all.

But he couldn’t do that. He couldn’t. Besides all of the time related bullshit that would go with changing the timeline, Dick was selfish enough to say that he did not want to let the young girl go at all. He wanted her to stay. He wanted her and Jason to get along and for them to both be siblings without having to fear that Jason’s Pit Madness or whatever it was didn’t flare up and he wanted for Bruce to be surrounded by everyone who cares for him.

If wishes were fishes Dick would be able to open his fish market and make a lot of money, that was for sure.

Running a wet, warm cloth over Timmy’s face only got him a blink or two. She wasn’t reacting to anyone now. She just sat there, in the blood-stained clothes Bruce all but wrangled her into before the cops arrived at her house. She needed to change. To get out of the bloody mess and into something clean.

“Okay Tiny-Tim. Let’s get you out of these clothes and into the shower.” He doesn’t speak loudly, not wanting to startle the young girl out of whatever shock she was in.  

The lights are on but no one is currently home in Timmy’s mind right now. Looks like they are just going to have to call back later it seems. She wasn’t reacting or moving on her own. With the help of Bruce and Alfred, Dick was able to strip her out of her clothes and get her into the shower. There were wounds, fresh and painfully wounds all over her pale body. Some must have been from patrol because the stitches on her hips looked fresh and painful. And broken. He would need to fix that.

He knew that Tim’s team was downstairs and that Oracle had called them all as soon as the call came through that all the Drakes were dead. He knew that they were all there and were all waiting desperately to see Timmy. But Dick didn’t want them near her. She was fragile and needed to be handled with care. He knew that they all just wanted to help her and that was good. The overwhelming need to comfort a friend in need is what makes them all good people. Makes them the caring and thoughtful heroes they are.

But Timmy didn’t need any of them right now. She didn’t need them crowding her or being in her space. She needed family. She needed Dick and Bruce and Alfred and Jason when he has calmed down and maybe Cass and Steph because they were all family and that was all Timmy needed.

He knows he should not be thinking like that. Possessiveness was a terrible trait that he needs to let go of but it is hard, so very hard not to kick everyone out of the Manor and keep Timmy safe and isolated away from anything that could harm her. He shouldn’t be having these thoughts and he knows, he really does know, that these thoughts only happen because he lost Jay and he doesn’t know how to deal with that guilt even now that Jay was alive and here with them and-

And he needed to calm down. He needed to stop and think and act like Nightwing, the leader and big brother. He cannot afford to act like Dick Grayson here. Dick Grayson was a human disaster and won’t be able to help his sister right now if he starts acting like a self-centred idiot.

Still, looking down at her all but hanging loosely in his arms as he dried her off and sat her down on the large tub so that Alfred could redo those broken stitches, Dick just couldn’t help those feelings of possessiveness overwhelm him. And by the look on Bruce’s face, he was feeling it too.

Timmy was their Baby Bird. The one the adored and wanted to protect all the time because she was just so weak and small and Dick knew in his head that she was a force to be reckoned with these days and that she was well on her way to becoming an A list hero.

But in his heart, he still saw her as the baby faced little twelve-year-old girl who he taught how to throw a decent punch. She was the little sister he had always wanted when he was younger and still with the circus. He adored her and loved her completely.

And he did know that some of that love came from guilt. Guilt that he hadn’t been the best big brother he could have been to Jason because he had been angry at Bruce at the time. He had been so angry that Bruce had taken his Mother’s name for him and had given it to Jason without his permission that he had taken it out on Jason, rather than Bruce. And after their first and terrible meeting, Dick had known that he had forever fucked up his and Jay’s relationship.

If he had not have died, Dick believes that they may have eventually gotten along properly. That they would have worked something out. But Jason died and then he had a small, excited child who looked up to him and he couldn’t, wouldn’t let himself fuck it up like he did with Jason.

So, Nightwing became the always the cool, calm guy who is everyone’s big brother. At least to the younger generation that is. To his own team and friends, he was allowed to be a normal person with normal emotional outbursts. But since taking on being the younger teams ‘den mother’ and all-round mentor and big brother to Timmy, he has forced himself to be this person that doesn’t get angry easily.

Which is you know, absolute bullshit. Everyone calls Jason the Angry Robin but anyone with half a brain knows that Dick is the Angry Robin. The Robin that rages and explodes and leaves a trail of destruction in his wake. At least Jay has a reason for his anger. The Pit fucks with people’s minds and the trauma he went through with dying really did give Jaybrid a reason to lash out. Dick just gets angry and fucks shit up before someone calms him down.

He knew that Timmy didn’t feel like they loved her, especially since taking Jason back in. But they did love her. They love how she stumbled down in the morning after a long case or patrol and would look at them sleepily before stealing Bruce’s coffee. They loved how she would get excited about small little things and would ramble on and on until she blushes and stops because she realises that she is still talking. They love her enthusiasm and joy and how brilliant she is.

They love her. All of them do.

And watching her sit numbly on the edge of the bath, barely twitching or moving as the stiches go through her skin, broke their hearts.

One of them would have go downstairs soon and tell Timmy’s team to go home for the night and come back tomorrow evening. They needed to get some clothes for Timmy for the next few days, seeing as she only had over night clothes in the Manor. Bruce needed to send a few messages to his lawyers about getting custody of Tim.

There was so, so much that needed to be done. And Dick didn’t want to leave Tim’s side at all. His Baby Bird was hurt and needed help and the guilt was just eating him inside, telling him that it was his fault that she had to face this alone when he could have been there with her but he had not and-

And he would not be any help his sister, father, brother or grandfather if he let himself fall apart right now. There was work to be done and the quicker he gets it done, the easier it would be on all of them.

He may have given Jay three days to go and find out what he could but Dick would be damned if he doesn’t go out and help the younger man search. With the rage and guilt rising like bile in the back of his throat, Dick could say honestly that he was looking forward to beating some heads in. And to leaving the oppressive atmosphere of grief and pain that was seeping into the Manor’s walls.

But that will wait. Right now, there are jobs to be done. The jobs won’t ease the guilt or rage like a good ass kicking would, but they were necessary and needed. Alfred and Bruce can look after Timmy for a few hours or so while he does these few jobs.

He isn’t running away.

(He isn’t.)  

#Broken Nest for Broken Birds #hellsbells wrote something!!! #batman #dick grayson #nightwing #tim drake #red robin #bruce wayne #alfred pennyworth #jason todd #red hood #batman fic

[brownnesscrew]

Backstage at the Fantasy Springs Resort Casino in Indio, California, on May 23, 2015, J. was thrilled that her 19-year-old daughter’s music career was going to make a major leap forward from recording demos and performing at talent shows to the chance of stardom — thanks to the help of an R&B superstar.

“When we got to go backstage with R. Kelly, we stayed there over two hours,” said J. “One-on-one with just me and my daughter and him. We went back to talk about the music. He listened to her CD. He was going to help her with her CD, and I was really impressed with him at first, because I have always been an R. Kelly fan.”

J. said that Robert “R.” Kelly, who turned 50 in January, met her daughter backstage at a concert in Atlanta earlier that month. Soon enough, he’d invited her to fly out to the Indio concert on his dime. J. said she’d heard about past sexual misconduct accusations against Kelly, but wasn’t overly worried. She is a fiercely devoted stage mom — she and her husband of 22 years, Tim, a car dealer, had moved from Memphis to Atlanta to help their eldest child’s career — and was confident she could protect her daughter.

“In the back of our minds, we were thinking [my daughter] could be around him if I was with her,” J. said. “It didn’t really hit home. Even with the Aaliyah situation, now that I think about it, ‘Age Ain’t Nothing But a Number’ ... but you don’t think about that. You grew up with the song, and you like the song.”

Two years later, J. and Tim are in a desperate fight to bring their daughter home. (BuzzFeed News verified their identities and full names in public records, but is withholding the alleged victim's full name and her parents' last name to protect her privacy.)

“It was as if she was brainwashed.”

As part of their efforts, the mother closed her businesses, became a relentless amateur detective, and shared her findings with the FBI and police in two states. But their daughter isn’t a missing person — at least not in the eyes of the law. She still lives with Kelly and says she’s doing fine, despite her parents telling the police that she is “being held against her will” in what they call a “cult.”

Three former members of Kelly’s inner circle — Cheryl Mack, Kitti Jones, and Asante McGee — provided details supporting the parents’ worst fears. They said six women live in properties rented by Kelly in Chicago and the Atlanta suburbs, and he controls every aspect of their lives: dictating what they eat, how they dress, when they bathe, when they sleep, and how they engage in sexual encounters that he records.

The last time J. saw her daughter was Dec. 1, 2016.

“It was as if she was brainwashed. [She] looked like a prisoner — it was horrible,” she said. “I hugged her and hugged her. But she just kept saying she’s in love and [Kelly] is the one who cares for her. I don’t know what to do. I hope that if I get her back, I can get her treatment for victims of cults. They can reprogram her. But I wish I could have stopped it from happening.”

J. and Tim said they have only heard from their daughter twice since they last saw her. They got a one-sentence text from her on Christmas Day: “I hate Christmas has to be this way this year.”

And J. received another text on May 14: “Happy Mother’s Day from me and Rob.”

Kelly has sold nearly 60 million albums during his 25-year career, and though his relevance is fading somewhat from the heyday of “I Believe I Can Fly” and “Trapped in the Closet,” he remains a major star in high demand for concerts, endorsements, television and radio appearances, and glossy magazine profiles. When he’s not performing, Kelly splits his time between his suburban Atlanta home and Trump Tower in Chicago. Extensive interviews with Mack, Jones, and McGee and a review of legal documents by BuzzFeed News paint a picture of what Kelly’s life offstage is like today.

The women in Kelly’s entourage initially think “This is R. Kelly, I’m going to live a lavish lifestyle,” said Mack, who worked as Kelly’s personal assistant for a year and a half starting in 2013 and has remained in touch with some members of his inner circle. “No. You have to ask for food. You have to ask to go use the bathroom. … [Kelly] is a master at mind control. ... He is a puppet master.”

“He is a puppet master."

Jones and McGee both said they lived with Kelly and had sexual relationships with the star at different times over the past five years before leaving. Their documentation of this time is limited, however, as they said Kelly controlled their phone and social media use while they were under his roof, and they were not allowed to take photos with Kelly or of the rooms where they were living.

According to Mack, Jones, and McGee, the women living in Kelly’s Duluth, Georgia, “guest house” or his Chicago recording studio last summer included:

A 31-year-old “den mother” who “trained” newcomers on how Kelly liked to be pleasured sexually. She had been best friends since high school with the girl in the videotape for which Kelly was tried in 2008. She recently parted ways with Kelly, these sources say.

A 25-year-old woman who also has been part of Kelly’s scene for seven years.

A recent arrival, a 19-year-old model who has been photographed in public with Kelly and named on music gossip websites — a rarity among the women in his circle.

An Atlanta songwriter who began her relationship with Kelly around 2009, when she was 19. (She is now 26.)

And an 18-year-old singer from Polk County, Florida. Mack said the Florida singer is Kelly’s “favorite — his number-one girl.”

Mack, Jones, and McGee claim that women who live with Kelly, who he calls his “babies,” are required to call him “Daddy” and must ask his permission to leave the Chicago recording studio or their assigned rooms in the “guest house” Kelly rents near his own rented mansion in suburban Atlanta. A black SUV with a burly driver behind the wheel is almost always parked outside both locations. Kelly confiscates the women’s cell phones, they said, so they cannot contact their friends and family; he gives them new phones that they are only allowed to use to contact him or others with his permission. Kelly films his sexual activities, McGee and Jones said, and shows the videos to men in his circle.

Mack, the star’s former personal assistant, said Kelly almost always tells the women to dress in jogging suits because “he doesn’t want their figures to be exposed; he doesn’t want them to look appealing.” She said when other men are in the same room, Kelly “would make the girls turn around and face the wall in their jogging suits because he doesn’t want them to be looked at by anyone else.”

If the women break any of Kelly’s “rules,” Mack and Jones said, he punishes them physically and verbally. For example, Jones claimed that Kelly held her against a tree and slapped her outside of a Subway sandwich shop in spring 2013 because she had been too friendly with the male cashier there. McGee said she never saw Kelly hit anybody, but also said he was running a “cult” and manipulated her emotionally and sexually.

“R. Kelly is the sweetest person you will ever want to meet,” McGee said. “But Robert is the devil.”

Of course, the law says that consenting adults may take part in any relationship they want, no matter how nontraditional. Welfare checks by police in both Illinois and Georgia in the past year didn’t lead to any charges; in January, the aspiring singer from Georgia told Cook County police she was “fine and did not want to be bothered.”

And all of the women in Kelly’s inner circle are of legal age — the age of consent is 17 in Illinois and 16 in Georgia — despite Kelly’s history of allegations against him regarding his sexual conduct with women. He was last tried in 2008 in Illinois, where he was acquitted on 14 charges of making child pornography. The case, which took a record six and a half years to go to trial in Chicago, focused only on a single videotape that prosecutors alleged showed him having sex with a 14-year-old girl. (While he was a reporter at the Chicago Sun-Times, this reporter received the tape anonymously and turned it over to the police; called by Kelly's attorneys to testify, he took the Fifth Amendment rather than revealing sources.)

The trial, however, excluded claims made by girls or their parents that alleged Kelly regularly abused his position of fame and influence to pursue illegal sexual relationships with underage girls — which has also been the subject of a dozen or more civil lawsuits against Kelly that were settled out of court with cash payments from Kelly. The girls signed nondisclosure agreements when they accepted the payments. Also excluded was evidence of Kelly’s marriage in 1994 to his then-15-year-old protégé, Aaliyah, for whom he wrote the album Age Ain’t Nothing But a Number.

Chicago attorney Susan E. Loggans declined to say how many settlements she has negotiated with Kelly before lawsuits were ever filed, but she said they were “numerous,” and recently included one for a 17-year-old aspiring singer from Chicago’s West Side who is said to have been part of Kelly’s inner circle. Loggans gave no other details, citing attorney-client privilege and the terms of the settlement.

Kelly also has been sued by other attorneys representing women over the age of consent in their respective states. In 2002, an Illinois lawsuit was filed by Montina Woods, a dancer who toured with Kelly’s friend Ronald Isley, in which Woods claimed she was unknowingly recorded by Kelly during sex. (Kelly eventually settled the suit, paying Woods an undisclosed sum.) And on April 21, a Mississippi lawsuit was filed by Hinds County sheriff’s deputy Kenny Bryant over an alleged affair between Kelly and Bryant’s wife.

The music industry has a history of stars using their fame to gain the trust of young women — and their parents — who expect professional relationships but end up in sexual ones. But numerous sources, including women who left his inner circle, made on-the-record allegations suggesting ongoing mental and physical abuse of several women in Kelly’s entourage far beyond that of the groupie culture. For two decades, Kelly has been accused of a similar pattern of mistreating women — some have called it “predation” — but because of his acquittal on the child-porn charges and the nondisclosure agreements in his numerous civil cases, the charges have remained in the realm of gossip instead of derailing his career. Major record companies, television shows, and other stars continue to work with Kelly. Lady Gaga recorded the duet “Do What U Want” with Kelly in 2013, Lil Wayne, Ty Dolla Sign, and Juicy J made cameos on Kelly’s 2015 album The Buffet, and he performed on The Tonight Show With Jimmy Fallon last December. He recently starred in a digital campaign for Alexander Wang.

“I got trapped,” said former insider Jones. “I had people telling me I was an idiot. But it took me a long time to realize they were right, and I’m talking now because I hope I can help some of these other girls.”

After her backstage visit with Kelly in Indio, California, the aspiring singer from Georgia began secretly talking with Kelly on her cell phone, her mother said.

“As far as I know, we weren’t talking to [Kelly] anymore,” J. said. “Or at least I wasn’t talking to him anymore.”

In June 2015, J. and Tim said, their daughter lied to them about taking a weekend trip to visit a Georgia university. Instead, Mack arranged for her to fly to Oklahoma City, where Kelly was performing.

After the show, she had sex with Kelly for the first time, she later told her parents and at least two friends, including a record producer who goes by the stage name TONE.

As the Georgia singer and Kelly became closer, TONE recalled her saying she was frustrated with Kelly. She thought every time she tried to bring up her music career Kelly changed the topic to sex — and she wanted proof. So TONE and the woman decided to secretly record a phone conversation between her and Kelly.

BuzzFeed News was later given a copy of the recording. On the tape, it’s not just what Kelly said that shows his pattern of behavior with the women close to him. It's how he said it, which is immediately clear from listening to the audio.

“I miss my baby,” Kelly told the woman, before asking her what she was wearing. After she replied, he told her: “I want you to get in the habit of telling me what color panties you got on every day,” he instructed repeatedly, revealing in his own words the early stages of their power dynamic and the demands her parents say have become criminal.

When she tried to turn the conversation to a song she was working on, however, Kelly seemed less engaged.

“Hello?” she asked him at one point, to make sure he was still listening.

After a few minutes, Kelly changed the subject. “I’m more interested in developing you. Songs are not an issue. We can always do a hit song.”

In June 2016, the daughter enrolled for summer classes at Georgia Gwinnett College in Lawrenceville and began living in the dorms. Her roommate at the school, who is being identified by the initials T.S. to avoid retaliation, told BuzzFeed News that, at first, she did not believe her new friend really knew R. Kelly. But, T.S. said, the Georgia woman would often call the superstar and put him on speakerphone during their explicit sexual conversations.

The Georgia woman also began visiting Kelly at his homes in nearby Duluth and sometimes traveled with him to Chicago, according to T.S. She recalled the woman telling her that Kelly took away her cell phone and replaced it with a new one, with instructions that she should only use it to communicate with him and needed to obtain his permission to use it to communicate with others.

“I’m more interested in developing you. Songs are not an issue. We can always do a hit song.”

T.S. also recalled the woman telling her that one time, Kelly sent a cab to pick up the women at his guest house and bring them to a club where he would meet them. The Georgia woman told her roommate that she laughed when the cab driver told a joke, and one of the other women in the cab texted Kelly to report this violation of his “rules.” When the Georgia woman arrived at the club, T.S. said, Kelly “bent her over and he whupped her behind because she laughed at the cab driver, who happened to be a man.”

By the middle of the 2016 fall semester, the Georgia woman’s appearance started to change: She began losing weight, and she cropped her long hair short, permed what was left, and dyed it blonde, said her parents and the former roommate. T.S. recalled her friend telling her that’s how Kelly liked her hair to look.

The Georgia woman eventually began skipping all of her classes, and she did not show up to take her finals in mid-December. Her parents confirmed the school considers her a student who is “no longer in good standing.”

She had already broken off all contact with her mother and father before she started skipping school. “My calls were all forwarded to voicemail,” J. said.

In the middle of the fall semester, during their quest to bring their daughter home, J. said she called the new cell phone Kelly had given her daughter, who broke one of Kelly’s “rules” by texting her parents from the phone to say she was fine.

J. said Kelly himself got on the phone after the daughter picked up and denied anything was wrong.

Two of R. Kelly's rental properties near Atlanta.

The parents filed a missing persons report with the Gwinnett College campus police. A spokeswoman for the school confirmed the report and the case number, but said that when an investigator called the parents and learned that they knew their daughter was with Kelly in his suburban Atlanta homes no action could be taken. Their daughter was not technically missing, and at 21, she is of legal age to do what she wants, campus police said.

The last time her parents saw her was in December 2016. “What we really wanted to do was an intervention,” J. said, but her daughter would not listen.

On Dec. 27, 2016, J. and Tim requested that the Johns Creek Police Department, which is responsible for the section of Duluth where Kelly rents the two houses, perform a well-being check on their daughter at the guest house. The police report obtained by BuzzFeed News said J. believes her daughter is part of the R. Kelly “cult” and that he is “abusive and is controlling her daughter.”

When police arrived, the report noted, the “door [was] open, house clear, no one there.” No further action was taken.

“What we really wanted to do was an intervention.”

A month later, the Cook County Sheriff’s police performed a well-being check in Chicago. The Georgia singer told officers she was “fine and did not want to be bothered with her parents because her father was threatening people,” according to the police report. (Tim denied this.) She told officers she instead keeps in touch with her grandmother, who she calls Nana.

When reached by BuzzFeed News, Nana said that she had spoken to her granddaughter by phone only two or three times since December, most recently on July 11. She said her granddaughter emphasized that she’s an adult in a consensual relationship with Kelly, and was mad at her parents for intervening. In text messages reviewed by BuzzFeed News, the granddaughter said she thought her parents were trying to ruin Kelly’s career.

Despite her granddaughter’s insistence, “I’m gravely concerned about her,” Nana said, echoing J.’s belief that she is being held against her will. If she could talk to Kelly today, Nana said, “I would tell R. Kelly to send my granddaughter home. He knows it’s not right and he would not want anybody doing this to his daughter.”

Multiple attempts by BuzzFeed News to reach the Georgia woman on her Kelly-issued cell phone were unsuccessful.

J. and Tim said they even reached out to the FBI about their daughter and spent hours being interviewed by an agent. Special Agent Stephen Emmett, an FBI spokesperson in Georgia, said the bureau’s policy is to neither confirm nor deny investigations into specific people or matters. But the parents are hopeful that perhaps federal law enforcement can help where local police have not.

“It’s not about my daughter, per se. It’s about all the girls,” Tim said. “It’s about my daughter, and I understand that. But the abuse that my daughter is actually enduring, nobody should go through.”

Kelly leaving the Cook County Criminal Court Building on June 13, 2008, after a jury found him not guilty on all counts in his child pornography trial.

Two other parents are fighting to get their daughter back. The parents of an aspiring professional singer from Florida said their daughter met Kelly when she was 17 years old, and she moved into one of his rental properties once she was over the age of legal consent. (BuzzFeed News verified their identities and full names, but is withholding the alleged victim's full name and her parents' last name to protect her privacy. Her mother asked to be called by her middle name, Theresa, for the same reason.)

Theresa said she initially let her daughter spend time with Kelly because it was “supposed to be a music relationship.” She now regrets that decision.

“My thing was I trusted. I have never been in the music industry before, ever,” Theresa said. “He is a lyrical genius — he is R. Kelly! And the fact is he went to court, he was never found guilty — he was acquitted — and we were led to believe there was no truth in it. Now I got all of these people asking about why my daughter is there, telling me, ‘All of that, the charges against Kelly, was true.’ Well, how come you didn’t tell me that before?”

The Florida singer first met Kelly when her parents took her to see him perform at Funk Fest in Orlando on April 18, 2015.

“The fact is he went to court, he was never found guilty — he was acquitted — and we were led to believe there was no truth in it."

“During the show, they were pulling people out of the audience,” Theresa said. “A guy said, ‘Oh yeah, her.’ He pulled her up onstage.”

After the show, a member of Kelly’s entourage gave the star’s phone number to the then-17-year-old high school senior, Theresa said.

“We called, but he wasn’t answering, so we left it alone,” she said. “Then I guess he must have got back later on or texted her later on.”

As with the Georgia woman, the relationship between Kelly and the Florida woman developed over phone calls and text messages that were kept secret from her family, the parents said.

“And then one day we were looking for her because she should’ve been coming home from school,” Theresa said. “Then finally we get a text message saying that she’s OK, that she had met up with R. Kelly in his hotel. And I’m like, ‘You met up with R. Kelly at his hotel?’”

Theresa and her husband, Angelo, said they rushed to the hotel and called the police, who advised them to deal with hotel security. Their daughter finally came down to see them, they said, but Kelly refused to talk with them.

After the incident at the hotel, the Florida teen “was only [supposed to be] talking to him when one of us was around,” Theresa said.

“We needed to make sure it was about music, because he was going to mentor her,” she said. “And then from there he wanted her to travel with him so she could see how the music game really was. ... We thought it could be an opportunity, and that she was going to be with a guardian — a female guardian that would keep an eye on her.”

But that may have been wishful thinking. Soon enough, the Florida singer was living with Kelly. Angelo said he initially received short text messages from his daughter every few weeks saying she was fine and the parents should not worry or try to contact her. Those have stopped.

McGee, one of the women who left Kelly, said the Florida woman is “head over heels” for Kelly. And McGee said Kelly is “obsessed” with the Florida woman, noting that he “would go into the kitchen and cook for her.”

But McGee’s feelings about the Florida woman were nuanced. “I have a 17-year-old daughter myself,” she said. “When I saw [the Florida singer] with him, it took me back. This could be my daughter. I just knew that it was not right and I just couldn’t understand what a man almost 50 is doing having sex with someone the same age as his daughter. That’s when I realized it was more of a mind-control thing.”

McGee also said she witnessed Kelly punish the aspiring Florida singer for breaking his “rules.”

“I just couldn’t understand what a man almost 50 is doing having sex with someone the same age as his daughter.”

“He left [the Florida woman] on the [tour] bus for, like, three days and she was not allowed to come out,” McGee said. “He said she didn’t do her homework — that’s why she was punished — which was very confusing, because she had just graduated [high school] over the summer.”

Multiple attempts by BuzzFeed News to reach the Florida woman on her Kelly-issued cell phone were unsuccessful.

Theresa said she is frustrated that lawyers and police have said they cannot help, and she fears that even if the relationship ends, she may not get her daughter back. On Dec. 24, 1996, Kelly was sued for $10 million by Tiffany “Tia” Hawkins, an aspiring singer and then–high school student in Chicago, who claimed she met the star when he lectured her choir class. According to the lawsuit, Hawkins began having sex with Kelly in 1991, when she was 15 and he was 24. The relationship ended in December 1994, when she was 18, the court documents state; distraught, she slit her wrists in an attempt to kill herself.

“I desperately want my daughter back but I’m not [sure] what will [be] the repercussions if she doesn’t come willingly,” Theresa said. “These girls think this man loves them. Matters of the heart are a touchy subject.”

The parents said they’ve tried numerous other tactics to bring their daughter home.

In August 2015, the daughter texted Angelo that she was in Chicago with Kelly, the parents said. On Aug. 26, 2015, they sent their older daughter to Kelly’s recording studio to check on her sister, according to her parents. Kelly and men in his entourage allegedly got involved in an altercation with the older sister when she tried to take her younger sister away, said the parents, who claimed the star and the other men pushed, shoved, and hit the older sister.

A police report obtained by BuzzFeed News indicated that one person allegedly struck the Florida singer’s sister in her face, but she did not seek medical attention. The case is classified as a simple battery and nobody has been arrested, according to the report, which said the investigation was initially suspended until a detective could contact the victim. A supplementary report was filed more than a year later, on Jan. 18, 2017.

“I have not talked to my daughter in more than a year,” Theresa said, adding she has left countless texts and voicemail messages that have not yet received a response. “We’ve had deaths in the family, birthdays, and I haven’t heard from her and she hasn’t been here for any of it. I didn’t even hear from her on Mother’s Day. All I want to do is bring her home.”

On Friday, July 14, after Kelly and the Florida woman had been asked for comment on this story, Angelo said he got a surprise phone call from his daughter, who invited him to come to see Kelly perform in Indiana on Saturday. Wary of Kelly’s motivations, Angelo said he declined the invitation. He also is angry over the other surprise news from his daughter: She said Kelly had recently paid for her to have breast enhancement surgery.

“I am beyond furious,” Angelo said. “I said to her, ‘How could you do this? What the hell were you thinking? What if you died on the operating table?’ I don’t even know what we can do anymore. I just know we got to get her home."

R. Kelly performing at Bass Concert Hall on March 3 in Austin.

Kelly has long maintained his innocence on allegations of underage sex, and in recent interviews he has either persistently dodged questions about his past behavior or stormed offwhen he was unable to do that.

Multiple attempts to reach Kelly were unsuccessful. Kelly’s RCA Records publicist Theola Borden, who was promoted to senior vice president of publicity for the label in 2014, did not respond to multiple emails and phone calls requesting comment.

“I suppose that is the price of fame. Like all of us, Mr. Kelly deserves a personal life.”

Linda Mensch, a civil lawyer in Chicago who represents the superstar, responded via email to the accusations outlined in this story. Mensch was asked about the on-the-record allegations that Kelly physically and mentally abuses women and that Kelly allegedly met one of the women in his inner circle when she was 17.

“We can only wonder why folks would persist in defaming a great artist who loves his fans, works 24/7, and takes care of all of the people in his life,” Mensch wrote. “He works hard to become the best person and artist he can be. It is interesting that stories and tales debunked many years ago turn up when his goal is to stop the violence; put down the guns; and embrace peace and love. I suppose that is the price of fame. Like all of us, Mr. Kelly deserves a personal life. Please respect that.” ●

#violence against women #r kelly #buzzfeed

[jesterlady]

Absolutely feel free to skip this one because it’s very long and very spoiler-y.

How can I explain Farscape?  No, I'm not going to do the Mean Girls thing, it wouldn't do it justice. I think what makes Farscape so special was that it wholly embraced its scifi-ness and yet somehow managed to invert most of the tropes therein, in such a way that still managed to make it seem ground breaking and yet completely scifi.  One of the ways it does this is the fact there's only one human on this show.  John Crichton is our guide to the universe and the eyes through which everything is filtered (totally making him like the companion on DW, lol) but the show is a big melting pot of alien.  Even the aliens that are humanoid or look human have very specific cultures, physiology, mannerisms, and values that make them completely alien.  It's a bit shocking to get used to. Before I watched Farscape the only thing I knew about it was that it was extremely popular and made with Muppets in Australia.  In fact during the first episode I got all confused because all along I'm been assuming John Sheppard from Stargate Atlantis was Crichton, whoops. The first episode itself didn't immediately make me fall in love but it didn't take much more than the first half of a season to make me completely involved, in a good way or a bad way.  Like I said, this show doesn't play by humanity's rules.  Crichton may be the lead of the show and he may influence them all in huge ways, but these are incredibly different creatures with extremely different morals.  One of the very first episodes deals with three of the characters cutting off the arm of the Pilot in order to secure maps to their home worlds.  I was so pissed off and I kept on being pissed off through the whole episode and you know what...they don't apologize or realize it was wrong and they weren't influenced by the alien bad guy like I thought at first, in fact, in the end scene D'Argo even says he'd do it again.  He was attempting in his own way to make it up to Pilot, but he wasn't backing down.  I fretted and fumed about it for a while and then started writing fic in my head to fix it, but the episode brings home an important fact.  This isn't Star Trek, these aren't people, this show does things differently, and the main characters might not always be likeable.  John and Aeryn both bring up the incident later when they're being accused of something to remind everyone that that they were the ones who were a. psychotic about reaching home and b. not exactly careful about treating Pilot well, but that's all you get on that front. So, yeah, it's an interesting show to get used to.  The cute little Muppet is a dirty, greedy, rotten old man who betrays them countless times and constantly deserves to get spaced.  When Chiana joins the crew later she's like a little alien street rat who uses her body and whatever else she can to get by, but even though the only thing alien looking about her is makeup, her physicality is so incredible.  The actress just makes her move and stand and be alien, it's amazing, she's like a living puppet on strings. It's not the greatest budget on the planet and the special effects weren't amazing, but using the prosthetics and the puppets, actually made it really cool.  I love shows set in Australia, they just don't care if they reuse actors a bunch or if everyone speaks with an Aussie accent, they just focus on making their show and trust it to deliver what the budget can't.  It's very inspiring. And like I said, it turns things on their head.  Our lead John Crichton is so very Southern and he's all action hero and all, but he's also a scientist, an astronaut, incredibly smart, peculiarly fitted to understand space and learn to live with aliens.  His plans are insane and they always work even though they require a lot of improvisation along the way.  He's a pop culture machine, always spitting out references, which we get, but the aliens don't.  It's always a joy to wonder what he'll say next and what new nickname he'll give someone.  Now, he's got a reason to act crazy.   Literally just being shot to the other end of the universe and living among aliens would do that, but then he is hunted by Crais, Mr. Head Peacekeeper, and then gets the most wanted tech in the universe, wormhole knowledge, encoded in his brain.  So literally everyone wants to capture him and when he does get captured, he's tortured and then turned into Mr. Nosferatu Scorpius's pet science project, up to the point of having a chip in his head and then neural clones.  Imagine living with your worst enemy in your head.  I mean, it's no wonder Crichton is insane.  To be honest, I love Insane!Crichton, he's hilarious.  But...it's torture to watch at the same time.  At the end of S2, when they're desperately trying to get the chip out and each time it doesn't work out, I was audibly begging the invisible showmakers to please let him get the chip out. Of course the torture didn't end with the chip, why would it?  What is most torturous and most wondrous about the show is John and Aeryn's relationship.  I mean, talk about a romance for the ages.  They're never fully together it seems, they're never actually apart, but it doesn't feel like a 'will they, won't they' type of deal.  They are bound by astonishingly amazing chemistry and it just builds and builds until their UST is enough to make you explode.   But even that's all backwards because they have sex like first thing in the first season, and then it's never a thing really.  But they talk and talk and talk and work well together and protect each other and look at each other and sometimes even cuddle in Pilot's den.   Now Aeryn is stiff and bred for war and was taught love was a weakness.  She is an outcast from her people and adrift amongst the very people she was born to kill and hate.  It's difficult, oh yeah.  All through S2 she's just fighting it like crazy.  There's this whole 3 parter where John actually gets married to and has a baby with some Princess but he'll never live long enough to see his child and Aeryn is off freaking out while he's being held hostage in this situation.  At the end...do we get a beautiful reunion?  Nope, we get them both knowing that they're compatible and smiling.  Finally, finally when she does admit she loves him, he's being taken over by the evil clone in his head and he ends up killing her. Oh, and then when she's brought back to life by Zhaan (so sad Zhaan died like that.  I mean, it was beautiful, but I hated that she was gone) Aeryn admits to John she loves him but she won't be with him because Zhaan gave her life for Aeryn and Aeryn won't risk feelings because it would get people hurt.  Trope annoyance alert! I hate the whole 'I love you but I won't be with you because I would lose focus and it would hurt more if one of us died' bits.  You're gonna be worried about him anyway, honey, you might as well enjoy the fun part of love. Anyway...S3 was all sorts of fun and angst.   Because they twin John so now there's a copy and an original.  As soon as they didn't resolve that by the end of that episode I knew there was going to be angst about it, I spent like 10 episodes analyzing everything they each did and trying to figure out who was the copy and who I should root for to live and be with Aeryn.  By the way, they never reveal who the copy is.  So I will never know if John Crichton actually died in the Uncharted Territories.  This show, this show. But what they did was actually really clever and interesting.  They split the crew up for most of the season on two ships.  One Crichton on each. So they got to develop some interesting storylines that way.  Of course, as soon as Aeryn ended up with one of the Crichtons on Talyn, you kind of felt he was doomed.  Red shirt alert!  Another trope not inverted but held for maximum angst.  Because of course she and that John got together and it was beautiful and perfect and wonderful.  Then in a dramatic two parter, that John finally unlocks the wormhole tech in his brain and gets rid of the Scorpius clone living in his head while with Aeryn in beautiful, tangible love so...naturally he dies of radiation poisoning. It wrecks Aeryn, she finally opened up and then she had to grieve so she clams right the hell back up.  I mean, I knew it would happen, but I was so sad for the other Crichton because he's been on Moya missing her like hell and the saddest moment in all of Farscape (apart from Zhaan and D'Argo's deaths) is when he runs up to the transport pod with the cutest love struck look on his face, so anxious to see her again, and she just cuts him.  Oh, it breaks my heart to think about it. Of course, then they have to work together and it's obvious they both still care.  I get it with her, but I'm just like 'girl, you have the best opportunity in the world, to watch the one you die and still be able to have exactly him.'  They've both had to watch each other die at this point.  At the end of the season she leaves and he tries to stop her but she can't deal and he lets her go because they freaking toss a coin to see who wins that argument.  Wow.  Of course, magically (this whole bit is kind of silly) he finds out she's pregnant after she goes!  (Neranti is just weird but again, a delightfully non human element of the show that they just stick in.) So next season when they get reunited and she's finally figured things out a bit, but she still can't tell him the whole truth or if the baby is even his (weird alien gestation alert) and so he decides he can't trust his heart to her.  Ack!  Then she's working on building his trust back up and he's taking drugs to dull his feelings for her.  I am usually with Crichton on their relationship stuff cause she's so bad at (unused to) it but this time I was about ready to smack that boy.  I was clutching a pillow and yelling at the screen for him to say no to drugs for so much of that season.  Turns out it was all a ploy to protect her and the baby from Scorpius (which is also silly) but then as soon as she called him on it they started a secret relationship and it's going to be fine but she gets kidnapped and tortured and he breaks all hell and makes a deal with the devil to save her and they accidentally start an interstellar war and the Scarrans are going to attack Earth and Crichton collapses the wormhole that would let him go home again and then the baby is his and he proposes and they kiss and are happy and happy and happy and then they get shot and turned into crystals and the series ends... Yeah, this show ends every season on a cliffhanger and they got canceled.  I actually only found that out at the start of S4 when I started to question if it would be okay.  I freaked out and googled it and found out they had a miniseries to wrap things up.  Heart quieted at that point, maybe it was knowing that the story would continue on, but actually the ending wasn't so bad if it had ended there.  I could have happily pretended the last two bits didn't exist and that it ended with them getting engaged and having a baby and defeating the Scarrans.  I don't know. What I do know is that there was a miniseries that wrapped things up really well, completing the arcs and wrapping up the wormholes and the Peacekeeper/Scarran war and resolving John and Aeryn perfectly, giving them the happy ending they deserved with marriage and baby. Not to say that everything ended happily because D'Argo died and I don't like that at all.  He kind of asked for it, resolving things with Chiana and Jothee like that. Now, bits of the show that were weird and involve all of that.  D'Argo and Chiana get together in S2.  It was a bit weird and out of the blue if you ask me.  Not that they couldn't be together, but I feel like it was fairly obvious that D'Argo and Zhaan were really heading somewhere and then it just...stopped.  D'Argo and Chiana were not an obvious couple and she's all innocence and sensuality and little girl (D'Argo always felt a bit like her dad to me).  D'Argo is all honor and loyalty and commitment.  Now...D'Argo has been searching for his son Jothee for the last two seasons and they finally reunite at the end of S2 and it's so beautiful and gorgeous, but all hell breaks loose and they have to fight a war and all that and in the chaos Chiana and Jothee sleep together.   WHAT?  Chiana's been freaking out about D'Argo preparing to ask her to marry him, but geez.  It's another example of how the show is not afraid to make its characters do things that aren't likeable and aren't human, but still, that one threw me.  I feel like there were so many other ways they could have gone with that.  I would have really liked to have had Jothee join the show and have him and D'Argo really struggle with getting to know each other again and, if they weren't meant to be, Chiana and D'Argo could have plenty of relationship issues without that huge betrayal.  Maybe Jothee and Chiana could even end up together but only after proper development.  But instead, they did that.  Jothee leaves and we don't see him again until the miniseries.  D'Argo forgives Chiana but they don't get back together until the end of S4 and then things get all good between them in the miniseries and then, naturally, D'Argo dies. John and Aeryn name their baby after him!  Sob! But like I said, the show wrapped everything up pretty well and they were extremely good about pacing, really, about telling a deliberate story with plenty of room for natural development along the way and making sure every character and relationship and story arc got fulfilled.  The only thing I felt like got dangled and forgotten was from S3.  Stark, I have a special place in my heart for Stark, not sure why.  Boy is legit crazy and sane at the same time.  Him and Zhaan could have been nice.   But they do this whole thing with him being on Talyn while the crew is split up where he finds out what Crais and Talyn are up to and there's this whole menacing threat to Crais and then when he leaves, he encodes a message for Crichton on his mask and when John starts to listen to it, it gets interrupted and we never hear what Stark wanted to say.  Even when Stark comes back, it's never referred to ever again.  It might have become a moot point because Crais and Talyn sacrifice themselves for everyone at the end of that season, but I still feel like it was a pretty big thing to just leave hanging like that. So...I can't describe Farscape and what it means to me.  The show completely wrapped itself in my insides and won't let go.  I just want to watch it over and over again and I wish there was more and yet I'm so glad it ended the way it did.  This show lived and breathed naturally and it wasn't afraid to make bold choices, assuming its audience's intelligence, and yet it entertained.  The episodes Crackers Don't Matter and John Quixote are so hilarious.  Every bit where John interacts with Harvey in his brain is so amazing and funny.  The acting is flawless, the writing brilliant, the creativity boundless.  This show is submersive, you can't help but be drawn in and caught up in the plight of the living ship Moya and her crew.  Found family is one of my favorite things and this absolutely encapsulates that.  I remember reflecting in S1 that I didn't think they could ever all be a cohesive whole because everyone was so different.   That never changed but even the unlikable characters (Jool started out so so annoying but I actually really grew to like her) and the people who did things that made you angry, somehow they're still a vital and amazing part of a family and they fight for each other, they're trying to survive.  They're caught up in a galaxy's machinations and politics and wars, and mostly what they want to do is go home and protect each other.  They have to do horrible things along the way.  They don't always win.  There's a truly awful episode where they go back in time and end up causing the slaughter of a bunch of nuns!  I mean, wow.  But in the end, you root for them and you will die rooting for them.  All the different interactions are important.  Obviously John and Aeryn are the heart and soul, but Aeryn's relationship with Pilot is so touching and tender.  Crichton and Chiana have this slightly sexual but yet not, brother and sister relationship that could be weird yet never is.  John and D'Argo's epic, bickering bromance is a thing for the ages.  It's just beautiful.  It's like Crichton, a plague that has ruined my life.

I watched 4 seasons and 1 mini series in 14 days.  It was perfect because I was on vacation for the first 10 days and I actually really took my time, feeling like I had the time. I started it casually, but it quickly consumed everything.  I lived and breathed Farscape for those days even when I was doing other things and I made sure I did other things.  My hands were shaking, my heart was racing, I clutched pillows and yelled at the screen, and I did happy squee flailing and monkey dancing around my living room on more than one occasion.  This show is not casual, it is a lifestyle.  I am so glad I was not watching it while it was on air because having to wait even a microt for between seasons would have been horrible and too much.  It is such a blessing though, the perfect sci fi show.  It's not a perfect show like Leverage is literally perfect and I would never change a thing about it and it's not fluff and happiness and comedy like Parks and Rec is perfect, but it is everything a scifi show should be and it has all the ingredients necessary to make it absolutely one of the best shows I have ever seen. 10 out of 10 recommend.  Make sure you have some time because binge watching is so necessary with this one but do it, do it, do it.

#farscape #text post #spoilers

[moviefanmike]

Schmoedown Spectacular III Spoiler Review: The Future is Bright

After watching nearly 7 hours of fantastic entertainment, it’s time to give my thoughts on this year’s Schmoedown Spectacular III.  What would happen to the KOrruption movement?  Would Thadd’s secrets be revealed?  Would there be new champions or title defenses?  Here we go...

Part 1 Match 1: Commission Bowl (Finstock vs Fyffe vs Williams vs Harloff)

KOrruption had run rampant over the Schmoedown for over half a year, under what seemed to be the careful direction of Mike Kalinowski.  But what many expected was someone was pulling the strings.  Kalinowski was directed to force Thadd Williams (the current Commissioner) to push for a Commissionership Match against Kristian Harloff, the original commissioner of the league.  Thadd was to give up temporary leadership of the Schmoedown at the end of last year’s Spectacular, but chose not too, using a faulty contract as the reason for keeping his power.  Eventually with Brianne Chandler’s suggestion, 2 more competitors were added in Emma Fyffe and Tom Dagnino (aka Finstock), making this a Commissioner Bowl, the winner becoming Commissioner of the Schmoedown for the next season.

Surprisingly Thadd Williams, in this very awkward position, was winning early.  Harloff and Finstock were struggling with Fyffe holding close to Williams.  At the beginning of Round 3 Finstock was eliminated early.  But after the final questions were asked we headed to Sudden Death with a 3-way tie.  Ultimately one question decided it all and Emma Fyffe won, and deservingly so.  But then Thadd trying to preserve his secrets attempts to shred the original KOrruption letter he received from Kalinowski, and was successful.  But then our mystery lawyer who had been working with Kalinowski, giving him orders from his mystery employer, not only helped reveal that Kristian Harloff was responsible for Kalinowski and using him as a puppet. Kristian then revealed that regardless of Thadd’s contract that he was always the “Chairman” of the Schmoedown and would continue to be so and removed Thadd altogether.

The Chairman hinted that the Commissionership that Emma Fyffe won will be one of many, my assumption being that there could be multiple commissioners heading each league of the Schmoedown and all answering to the Chairman, Kristian Harloff.  

Part 1 Match 2: Team Championships - Shirewolves (Cushing/Wolfe) vs Who’s the Boss? (Bateman/Reilly)

This was arguably the most anticipated match of the Spectacular.  You had the Shirewolves, a dream team of Rachel Cushing and Clarke Wolfe who proved all the haters wrong and became the most dominant team in the Schmoedown since The Patriots and their ridiculous run.  Then you had Who’s the Boss, a team created out of the anarchy of KOrruption, but ended up being a force in their own right, with surging Ben Bateman and the veteran and 2-time champ Mark Reilly.  

The match lived up to its hype and then some.  It all came down to 2 5-point questions and the rest is history.  The Shirewolves retained their titles and continued to prove all the haters and those who disprove of the Shirewolves wrong.  They are the rightful team champions.  It was well deserved.  Who’s the Boss however seem to want to stay together which leads to a post-match scene that has stirred up conversation amongst those of the Action Army...

Ben Bateman, saddened by his team loss, is greeted by his longtime teammate, the Dastardly Andrew Ghai, who proposes that if Bateman wants to stick with Reilly that he has found another person to be his teammate and they can form a faction.  All seems to be well when Ghai walks away until Ghai tackles (!!!) Bateman seeming to have injured him saying “Who’s the Boss now, B*%^?!?!”  I guess this is the end of Team Action, and this means Ghai’s future in the league will remain a mystery for now...

Part 2 Match 3: Star Wars Championship - Alex Damon vs Ken Napzok

Alex Damon seems to be undefeatable of late.  He won the 3-way at the live event, he then won the open match for the title.  But it seemed he wanted more of a challenge before really accepting being a Star Wars Champion.  KOrruption gave Ken Napzok an opening to align himself with Kalinowski to make it possible for Kalinowski to push Thadd Williams to put Napzok in a Star Wars Championship match.  

At first the match was close, with each player going blow for blow.  But after round 2 and some misses and steals, Damon took hold and never let go, once again confirming his dominance in the field of Star Wars trivia.  Possibly hinting at a possible future match, Damon wants to battle Witwer for the title, which would be something if the scheduling worked out, could happen at Star Wars Celebration in April.

Part 2 Match 4: #1 Contender Match - Clarke Wolfe vs Dan Murrell

This was a long-awaited match between two legends of the Schmoedown.  Clarke Wolfe, who has forged a singular path in the Schmoedown and lost her first ever title shot against a then undefeated Dan Murrell.  Then there is Dan Murrell himself, the GOAT as many call him and 2-time champion, who has had a rough year but had a great Ultimate Schmoedown Tournament run until running into Ethan Erwin, the potential Rookie and Player of the Year.  

This match was going to be tough by many prognosticators for Clarke Wolfe, knowing she would be defending her Team Title just two matches earlier against Who’s the Boss, and in the end that ended up being accurate with Dan Murrell taking the match and securing a spot for himself at the Season Opener in NY to go up against the winner of the main event of Spectacular between John Rocha, his current stablemate/rival and Ethan Erwin.  Clarke however once again fought admirably and you can tell she did all she could but came up short.  

Part 3 Match 5: Innergeekdom Championship - Mara Knopic vs Mike Kalinowski

This was probably my 2nd most anticipated match of the Spectacular, especially after what occurred in the 1st match between between these two competitors.  Mara Knopic came out of nowhere and took the Innergeekdom League by store.  Watching her live and taking the belt from Jason Inman was extremely impressive.  But then a wind of KOrruption blew through the room and Kalinowski showed up to demand (and then arrange) a rematch at Spectacular for the belt that Knopic just won, to which she shrugged it off saying she would do it.

At this point in Spectacular, Kalinowski is down as well as KOrruption.  Finding out Kristian Harloff has been using you, Napzok your partner loses his match, how does it end?  The match was as close as expected going all the way to Sudden Death.  And somehow, someway, Kalinowski won.  I feel like this match could have been won by Knopic, but that’s just how it goes.  More shocking was Knopic essentially stating she wants to take a step back from the Schmoedown and having an extremely brief interview.  I hope Knopic returns to the league because she definitely put her stamp on it.  Kalinowski however finally achieved his dream of holding the Innergeekdom belt.

Part 3 Match 6: Singles Championship - John Rocha vs Ethan Erwin

Since the beginning of Season 3 of the Schmoedown I fell in love with the Outlaw, John Rocha.  The personification of pure determination and will power, with a dose of good, old (and new) fashioned justice and smack talk, I couldn’t help but be a supporter of John Rocha then and now.  I’ve been on the train of Top Ten, the Four Horsemen, and now the Five Horsemen.  I was however concerned that this match might not go his way with the heavy favorite for Rookie and Player of the Year in Ethan Erwin challenging for his title.

As expected Ethan Erwin played as well as always, with Rocha stumbling a bit in the 2nd round.  Rocha kept it close but eventually lost in a TKO to Ethan Erwin, who is now a Singles Champion will have a rematch with Dan Murrell in NY, which potentially Murrell becoming the 1st 3-time champion.  That will make for a compelling season opener.  Then in the post-game interviews, Matt Knost, longtime partner of John Rocha, decides to retire from the Schmoedown, leaving an opening in Rocha’s stable.  That will be an interesting development going forward.

And running throughout the entirety of the event was a storyline involving Finstock/Dagnino looking for his infamous mask to no avail.  Well we found out that it was in fact Robert Meyer Burnett, the man burned and evicted from the Lion’s Den one year ago, getting some immediate revenge on Dagnino by burning his mask.  Not sure what this means going forward but RMB could be ready for a comeback...

We also got some major announcements regarding the Schmoedown for Season Six.  I recommend you watch for yourself towards the end of the Part 3 video yourself to learn more, but their Patreon comes into play which will help grow the league further.

And that was it for the Spectacular!  It was easily the best event put on by the Schmoes themselves Kristian Harloff and Mark Ellis.  Not to mention the countless others who put so much time and effort into this.  Please check out the Schmoedown thus far on Collider Video.  And please support them on Patreon!

#Schmoedown SchmoedownSpectacularIII MovieTrivia