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shreyamistry · 8 months

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👋 Hey, can't wait to hear what you think of foreign affairs as the story progresses. I was a lurker in the fandom back in the day and finding people still talking about the books on Tumblr makes me a little nostalgic.

Anyway yes I fully agree with friends to lovers being such a good trope, it's someone who you have good chemistry with already so making the leap to crushing is pretty believable. Despite that though I went for Blaine. Something about them being the Mc's rival without being needlessly antagonist towards them and the slow reluctance to admit there might be feelings there just got to me but the relationship with Tatum was really good too!

Another thing I appreciated about the book was the little diplomacy feature they implemented. I think they could have tweaked it a bit but I appreciate it when books have different mechanics to them.

In general though, there's some things in the later chapters that I wish they'd handled differently but I still think this book deserved more love than, say, the nanny affair. Good talking to you!

hiiii everyone, i have been sick and in the ER so that’s why I’ve been MIA, but I did manage to play the rest of Foreign Affairs ! I feel the same way, seeing people’s interest in choices still surprises me and gives me that nostalgic feeling of being obsessed w it 5 years ago.

It’s the best trope!!!! someone who knows everything about you and still loves you through everything they know about you makes me so soft and the slow pining and build up to them falling for each other and the even more pining of not wanting to ruin the friendship but loving that person so much 🫣 *chefs kiss*

I did have a little trouble picking between Blaine and Tatum, I won’t lie. Ultimately Tatum won out for me but Blaine and MC’s dynamic is so good. I love the way they’re rivals without being antagonistic as well!!! PB kinda does it like ass I won’t lie, I typically hate the rival LI, but the way Blaine and MC interact is so 🫶🏻 and I love that their rivalry is strictly fun for Blaine, like they don’t give a fuck they’re just having fun and hanging out w MC like it’s not the most scandalous thing ever and actually shows and acts like they like MC as a person and not just someone they want to get w.

I liked the diplomacy as well, I think it added a fun touch to the book and made me interested in the side characters, even if we’ve seen their faces in 20 other books lolllll.

I do wish they did the Ayna and MC storyline better, I think the drama is fun and I still really like Ayna and MC’s dynamic, it’s fun and interesting. And seeing them interact after the reveal was kinda meh. I wish they did more with the storyline and Ayna as a character really. Anyways these are my thoughts ty for asking and I loved hearing your thoughts!!!

#ask #answered #anonymoose #choices foreign affairs #ff #I’m gonna finish youR REQUEST SOON CAROLINE I PROMISE #brain machine wasn’t braining when I was sick #I wrote something and read it back the next day and was like is that even English…..

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cardinalnuggets · 3 years

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@playchoices can someone, anyone explain to me how the treatment of Ayna Seth in anyway, shape or form aligns with the promises you made in the action plan you released to address the treatment of characters of colour in your app on 16th June 2020? Really puzzled how we can be sitting here just shy of 10 months later living through exactly the same issues with the treatment of characters of colour. Issues YOU promised you were going to change. Issues in a book you have had ample time to edit before release following the publishing of your action plan.

Villianizing a woman of colour isn't cool, it isn't "interesting" and it isn't cute. Honestly I don't even know why I expected better. Your action plan was nothing more than lip service and you need to take ownership of the fact that you are still failing at even remotely offering fair treatment to your characters of colour.

#ayna seth #playchoices #playchoices foreign affairs #foreign affairs #fa spoilers #I guess #legit so fucking angry about this I have revived a tumblr I haven't been on in like 4 years to rant #and to anyone reading this and getting butthurt because we expect fair treatment for poc can miss me with your bs #it isnt unreasonable to expect companies to hold true to promises they have made #ayna deserves better #i even linked the blog post for you sexy minxes incase you forgot what you said xoxo

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progamermove · 3 years

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I disappear for a few days and I come back to hellfire in the fandom

#personal #ayna deserves better #pb ain't shit #and wlw also deserve better #I stand by these words

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hell-chronicles · 3 years

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You know I feel like having a traitorous LI who sells MC out or who is on the "enemy's side" could be really interesting and open up so many intriguing plot points.

But making Ayna, who's barely in the story and up to this point was also barely even relevant, the traitor just feels wrong.

It's like putting salt in the wound

#playchoices #choices stories you play #choices #foreign affairs #choices fa #ayna seth #im so sorry ayna stans you deserve so much better #there's also the possible that ayna is just a red herring #but having us believe that ayna is a traitor for a week? yikes

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ratanslily · 3 years

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okay so my blog has been pretty negative lately but you know it had to be done, but a biggg thanks to all the people who have stood up for the same cause❤❤ i see you and appreciate it. makes me a teeny bit hopeful about this place! i know pb ignores us as usual but feels nice knowing that people actually care about this and arent side eyeing this issue

#ayna nation you deserve so much better #and non ayna stans standing up for her you deserve everything good!!

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playchoicesconfessions · 3 years

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Sent by @ophelia-choices

'About Foreign Affairs: I'm starting to think that it would have been better if Blaine was our only LI. The story could've be the enemies/rivals to lovers/allies slow burn-forbidden love we all deserved, the whole scandal plot would've made much more sense since Ardonia and Rutherland hated each other and could not accept MC and Blaine being together. Also, Ayna was done very dirty and her arc was written very poorly, while the bodyguard love story trope with Tatum could easily be the main plot of another book, like.. what Witness should've been.'

POST/CONFESSIONS DO NOT REFLECT THE MOD’S PERSONAL OPINIONS!

#foreign affairs #fa #blaine hayes #ayna seth #tatum mendoza #playchoices #confessions #mod candy

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adam-memeleri · 3 years

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Sweet Talk

in this weeks edition of ayna deserved better: i started thinking about deep relationship ayna and uhhh... hnnghhhhhh ansnsjdksks

T Rating (just fluff and flirting lmao. and some language)

Ayna x MC (Kennedy)

~1k words

Soft music plays through a speaker resting on the countertop, notes floating through the apartment as Ayna’s hums swirl with them. She bounces on her feet, dancing lightly as she stirs a pot on the stove, ingredients scattered about.

“Look at you,” a laugh sounds from behind her, “Dancing Queen.”

A wide smile splits Ayna’s lips as she playfully swishes her hips, “I’ve got moves.”

Arms wrap around her from behind, squeezing tight as a chin lands on her shoulder. “Mmhmm,” Kennedy hums, their nose nuzzling into Ayna’s neck, “You’ve got more moves than anyone I know, babe.”

“You should get out more.”

Kennedy barks a laugh, “Hey!” releasing the woman in her arms to slouch against the counter instead.

“I’m just saying,” Ayna chuckles, tossing in spices.

“Besides, if I went out more I wouldn’t have nearly as much time to spend with my beautiful girlfriend,” Kennedy darts forward, pressing a light kiss to Ayna’s cheek.

“You make a convincing argument.”

“I always do.”

“Politicians,” Ayna snickers, “They’re all so sneaky.”

“And teaching assistants,” Kennedy’s head shakes in a tease. “They’re all so pretentious.”

Frowning, Ayna bumps her hip into Kennedy’s, “I thought you liked my pretentiousness.”

“I love your pretentiousness. I also love that you’re a better cook than me,” they dip their finger into a bowl, swiping some sauce and licking it off their finger.

“You just like the free food.”

“Well, duh,” Kennedy laughs brightly, grinning easily.

“Speaking of,” Ayna announces, drawing out the last word, “Done! Did you get the wine?”

“Yes ma’am,” Kennedy retreats, crossing to the opposite side of the kitchen where a bottle of wine rests. They tug open a cabinet and grab two wine glasses on the way, setting them down with a clink.

They set about uncorking the bottle, toying with it as Ayna turns her attention plating their dinner, throwing together all the different parts as neatly as she can. She takes forks from the silverware drawer, glancing over her shoulder as she rests them on the plates to find Kennedy walking towards the living room, hands full of wine.

Ayna follows, settling their meal on the coffee table as Kennedy passes a glass of wine. “Bone apple teeth,” they grin over the rim of their glass, their smile growing when Ayna laughs.

“Just eat your food.”

“Alright, alright,” Kennedy laughs, taking their plate as the pair on the couch fall into relative silence, the old sounds the scrapping of cutlery and the pouring of more wine.

---

Ayna presses her cheek further into Kennedy’s shoulder, humming as their fingers comb through her hair, toying with a dark lock occasionally. The couple’s sprawled out on the couch, music still humming somewhere in the apartment.

“Thank you for dinner,” Kennedy finally murmurs, breaking the stillness filling the living room.

Ayna shifts, her arm over Kennedy's waist tightening as she peers up at their face, the nearby lamp casting shadows. “Thank you for being here.”

“Thank you for being here," their finger pokes at her side, a sparkling smile breaking across their features. "Even with all the mess that is my life.”

“There is quite honestly nowhere I’d rather be,” Ayna hums, sinking back into their side.

“Nowhere? Really? Not even a tropical island?”

“Hmm. Maybe…”

Kennedy chuckles, fingers slipping back into dark tresses, “Well I for one would take a nuclear bunker with you over a Caribbean island any day.”

“Sweet talker.”

“Exactly how sweet are we talking? Candy corn or pure sugar?”

“Hmm,” Ayna hums contemplatively once more, considering carefully. “Chocolate?”

“Ooh, I could go for some chocolate."

“We have some in the pantry.”

Kennedy abruptly darts upright, Ayna jolting upwards with them as their eyes bulge out in their excitement, “We do?!”

She laughs, shifting into the back cushions, “I went to the shop yesterday and picked some up since you ate all of it.”

“Hey! You took the last of the strawberries last time, so we’re even.”

“Okay, okay.”

“Oh, wait!" Kennedy shouts out, jumping to their feet. "Chocolate-covered strawberries!” they weave quickly through the living room’s furniture and towards the kitchen without a backwards glance.

Ayna turns to watch them, her gaze following them as they disappear around a corner. “Will you at least share with me?” she laughs, calling after them.

Their head pops back around the corner, an amused grin on their lips, “You’ll get the first bite, promise.”

They dart from Ayna’s line of sight again, a few clatters sounding from the kitchen. Ayna’s lips pull into a smile as she stretches out on the sofa, settling into the cushions and chuckling beneath her breath when Kennedy swears, “For fuck’s sake…”

After a few minutes and several sounds of the microwave, they reenter, a platter held triumphantly above their head. “I did it!”

They slump back onto the sofa, crossing their legs and facing Ayna, the platter propped on their lap. Their fingers spin around the rim of a small bowl full of melted chocolate, strawberries with the tops cut off and toothpicks resting beside it.

“First bite, just for you.” Kennedy stabs one of the smaller strawberries and dips it in the melted chocolate, offering the stick to Ayna with a soft smile.

She takes it between her teeth, sliding the strawberry off the stick and biting into the fruit. Kennedy grabs their own, dunking it in chocolate and taking a big, eager bite.

“Is it as sweet as my talk?” they ask through a mouthful, chocolate dripping down their chin.

Ayna grins, swiping her thumb along their chin and sucking the chocolate from the pad of her thumb. “No. You’re still sweeter.”

Kennedy’s smile is soft, relaxed as they lean forward to press their lips to Ayna’s. She returns it, one hand raising to cup their cheek and urge them closer, a smile of her own curving her mouth.

Her forehead presses to theirs as they separate, dark eyes tracing their eyelashes and the thumb on their cheek drawing idle circles. “See? Sweet.”

#im too tired to come up with what dish she made so forgive me for being vague #playchoices #foreign affairs #choices fanfic #ayna seth #i haven’t played since the attack but i hear she’s still being treated like shit so this week and next i will be trying to counteract that #abdjwksk #ayna x mc #fa ayna #choices fa #hot drinks did surprisingly well so fingers crossed this one lives up to it

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userpurple · 3 years

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im not even surprised about pb springing foreign affairs having its finale today on us. SO MANY LOOSE ENDS. everything's suddenly very casual with ayna (i get that she didn't deserve a lot of what happened to her, but the forgivance process seemed a bit too easy).

PETER AND DIONNE deserved better. i rooted for them SO MUCH. :( Actually, all of MC's squad did. they're like a non-medical, political version of Jackie, Bryce and Rafe.

aaalllll that buildup for this huge scandal and mc and Tatum just casually kiss with Demarco in the near vicinity. and evil!Winston would've been...well. a thrilling turn.

and how are we suddenly at the peace summit??

im echoing the truth that this book had so much potential. and now it's wasted. it could've gotten a book 2. why not just take a little money from the well-paying books and give books like foreign affairs a sequel???

i'm past being mad and frustrated at this point. im just sad. i'll probably eat a box of cookies and wrap a blanket while i play the finale.

#choices stories you play #playchoices #foreign affairs #thea rambles

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drakewalkerfantasy · 3 years

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@choices-bound @jamespotterthefirst @starrystarrytrouble @sophxwithers @mercury84choices @walkerswhiskeygirl @ramseysrookiex @ao719

Just because I love them both and PB’s reply did nothing to irritate me even more...

Tatum deserves better!!! Blaine deserves better!!! Ayna deserves better!!! Dionne deserves better!!! Peter deserves better!!! Alexei deserves better!!! Nikolai deserves better!!! Evelyn deserves better!!! Zamora deserves better!!! Murphy deserves better!!! Fucking DEMARCO deserves better 😡😡😡😡 yep I love them ALL!!!! I’m pissed could be even without the reason... could be just stupid too sensitive!!! And even could be wrong and accidentally upset another 2 people!!!! 🤷‍♀️ sorry.... 🤷‍♀️

#foreignaffairs #choices foreign affairs #tatum mendoza #blaine hayes

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crystalwillow · 3 years

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I've taken a step back from the fandom (some would say left) but man am I mad about finding out that the series finale of FA is tomorrow.

I definitely feel like one of a few thing has happened here.

They saw the book was doing sort of okay, so decided "end it" so we have a valid excuse in the future when ask why we don't do more LGBTQIA+ books with they/them pronouns included

They saw the posts about Ayna and went "shit they're right. We are paywalling her and giving her minimal screen time. And instead of correcting it, are just ending the book

They didn't plan this book enough and now they've run outta plot so instead of putting it on hiatus to regroup and write further, they're pulling a Distant Shores and then when we ask if they can CONSIDER a book 2 they'll put in a newsletter the series is cancelled.

Like, I don't get why they continuously put their money into the books people diamond mine instead of making those books and whilst those books are making them money they plan the books we want to see and have asked for so they can be the greatest books on the app.

For example, TRR/TRH has gone one entirely too long. The series could have been called The Royal Romance, and 5 books long. 2 focusing on use falling in love and marry our Li, one about our pregnancy, leaving the final 2 being us raising our kid and the final chapter being them turning 16 and us throwing them a party; reassuring them "you are going to make an excellent leader when the time comes." the telling them to enjoy their party for now. But it's just so long and confusing at this point I can't remember half of what's gone on.

Baby bump. Whilst cute and I'm sure loved by older people in the fandom, it's not something I see as have been needing of a 2nd book. The Nanny Affair? Idk I kinda like it but I feel like it could have had a 1 book plot. Queen B. It was mentioned we'd be there for 2 years so 2 books makes sense.

But another book that was too long and I feel like had too much spent on it was Witness: A bodyguard romance. This book was entirely too long for what it was and had potential to be so much better. The first 2 chapters seem promising, but after that it started going downhill...

There's just books like FA, DS, RoD, TE, It Live anthology that deserve so much more. But it's like they're scared of giving them too us. And I feel like it boils down to the fact that the majority of people (excluding TE & potentially bc I'm not clear on statistics) haven't romanced the white love interests, whether that's a white female or a white male, they haven't been picked.

They can sit back and pull the "We have POC empolyee so we can't be racist" card, but it's definitely starting to feel like a race based issue the more I sit back and think about things.

Imma finish with this:

If we don't find out why Wiston wants to cancel the peace summit so desperately, resolve the conflict between Ardona and Rutherland, find out if our mother won the election, and get to settle and be official with our Li and get a date out of this finale... then I am not classing it as a finale. It will literally get the same treatment I'm giving DS because I know how we all felt about that "finale"

#choices stories you play #playchoices #pixelberry studios

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cardinalnuggets · 3 years

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7 & 11 together from this for Ayna x f!mc

Safe in your arms

Word count: 1545 Rating: T Summary: Kennedy has a hard day and Ayna shows up to cheer her up. Prompts: "I’m in love with your voice" and "I don’t think I have ever felt safer than in your arms" Tagging: @robintora if anyone else wants to be tagged in the future, let me know!

Lost in a daydream of a life where she didn’t have to watch her back every time she left home, Kennedy didn’t hear the first sharp knock against the door to her suite. Weeks had passed since her “scandal” had first broken and the paparazzi weren’t showing any sign of getting bored with her, even though nothing exciting enough for them to report on had happened since the incident at the lake. They just kept waiting for her to slip-up, which she was sure was inevitable at this point.

She was exhausted having to put on her smile and “perfect first daughter” mask all day every day. This suite was the only place she truly felt like she could be herself and she hated it. Hated staring at the same four walls and feeling like this was the only place she was safe. If only she could have just one day where she was free to be herself.

A second knock sounded against the door, finally pulling her out of her spiralling inner monologue.

“Dionne?” She yelled towards Dionne’s room. Her suitemate had been hiding in there for the past 15 minutes to escape the negativity surrounding Kennedy like a dark, angry cloud.

When there was no response, Kennedy shouted for her again. Still nothing. Sighing in annoyance, she dragged herself off the sofa and towards the door.

“Ayna?” She squeaked when the door swung open to reveal her girlfriend on the other side.

Ayna opened her mouth to reply, but before she could, Kennedy reached out and grasped her hand, dragging her inside. After how today had gone, she couldn’t trust that there wasn’t a stray photographer hiding out in the bushes.

“What’re you doing here?” Her voice was sharper than she meant it to be, but she was just so worried about getting caught in another scandal. Given the way the press acted with the first one, she was sure someone even knocking on her door would be enough for them to create another whole scandal. She couldn’t cope with them realising Ayna was the other half of the story. Ayna deserved better than being dragged through the mud like Kennedy was.

Raising an eyebrow at Kennedy’s snappy tone, Ayna moved passed her to sit on the sofa. “Nice to see you too, Kennedy,” she responded, patting the space next to her. “Now why don’t you come and tell me what’s put you in such a foul mood?”

Visibly deflating, Kennedy threw herself down next to Ayna. Wordlessly, Ayna wrapped her up in her arms and tugged her close until Kennedy’s head was resting on her shoulder.

“Sorry,” Kennedy mumbled into the soft skin of Ayna’s neck. The floral scent of her perfume, and the feeling of her arms wrapped around her slowly chased away the tension from the day until she had melted against Ayna’s side.

Several minutes of silence passed between them as Kennedy just revelled in the feeling of being in her girlfriend’s arms. Although Dionne had already told her what had happened when she had told her to come and cheer Kennedy up, Ayna wanted her to get everything off her chest so it would stop feeling like such a burden to her. So, gently she nudged her in the ribs before repeating her question to her.

“Just another day in the life of the first daughter of Rutherland,” Kennedy muttered with a humourless chuckle.

After letting out a long breath, she fell back into silence. Ayna had more than enough on her plate what with her father, her job and trying to avoid being discovered as Kennedy’s secret lover that Kennedy didn’t want to burden her with all her problems too.

“I don’t think I have ever felt safer than in your arms,” she murmured instead of elaborating on what had made this particular day worse than most.

“Lucky for you, they’re always here when you need them. I’m always here when you need me.” Her voice was soft as she said this, but Kennedy could tell that she was far from letting her wriggle her way out of this conversation.

She let Kennedy stew in silence for another minute or two before speaking up again.

“Remember when you told me that I can lean on you and I don’t need to go through things alone?” Ayna curled her fingers under Kennedy’s chin and coaxed her head up so she could see her face. “That goes both ways, okay? If something is bothering you, no matter small or silly you think it is, I want to know about it. I want to know everything about you.”

Seeing the sincerity on Ayna’s face squeezed Kennedy’s heart. Despite not knowing her long, somehow Ayna always knew just what to say. Any lingering reservations she had about confiding in Ayna vanished, but she found now that there was nothing really to say because her bad mood was long gone.

“I want to know everything about you too,” Kennedy replied before she leant in to press a tender kiss to Ayna’s lips. Sighing, she settled herself back against Ayna, nuzzling her face against her neck again. “It’s not that I don’t want to tell you, it’s just that there isn’t much to tell. The paparazzi were everywhere I turned today, but that’s not new.” She shrugged, taking a moment to just breathe Ayna in. “It just got to me today. More than usual. I don’t know why. But you being here is enough to make me forget all of it.”

The smile that curled at Ayna’s lips was breath-taking, and Kennedy could feel it when she leant down to press a kiss to her forehead. “Well next time you feel like this, call me, so Dionne doesn’t have to.”

“Dionne called you?” She groaned, burying her head further against Ayna’s skin. God, she must have been insufferable if Di had had to call in reinforcements.

“Why else did you think I came?”

Kennedy could hear the amusement in Ayna’s voice and it was enough to coax a smile onto her face.

“I don’t know. I thought maybe you were just psychic and knew I needed you?”

Ayna laughed. “I’m good, but I’ve not quite mastered psychic abilities yet.”

“Damn,” Kennedy replied, and after both of their laughs trailed off, they fell into a comfortable silence. It was nice to just be able to be together, especially since they hardly ever got to spend time alone together.

“Can you just…talk?” Kennedy asked quietly after some time. “Tell me about your day or something? I’m in love with your voice.”

“If that’s what you want,” Ayna replied. She adjusted herself so she was sitting more comfortably against the sofa, and Kennedy found herself practically draped across her body like a blanket.

“I went to visit my father today. He was especially cheery and just for a short time I forgot that we were in a hospital and that he was sick. It was bittersweet, but they’re scheduling his surgery for two weeks’ time so hopefully him not being in hospital will be a reality soon.” The hope in her voice had Kennedy squeezing her arms tight around her waist. She hoped more than pretty much anything in the world that Arjun would make a full recovery. He truly was a wonderful person, just like his daughter.

“He kept asking about you,” she laughed, burying her face in Kennedy’s hair. “He wants to know if you’ll visit again because he has so many more embarrassing stories to share with you.”

“Really?”

“Yes. I think he’s figured out you’re not just a student to me.”

Ayna’s voice sounded unperturbed but Kennedy wanted to be sure. “Really? And that’s…okay?”

“Of course. Well it is with me, at least. I was thinking next time you come with me to visit, we could confirm his suspicions. If that’s okay with you?”

“You want to tell your father about us?” Kennedy pulled back enough that she could look Ayna in the eye. She was wearing a look of amazement on her face at the thought that Ayna was just as serious about her as she was about Ayna.

“Yes.” She cupped Kennedy’s cheek with one of her hands, stroking the skin with her thumb. “If my father being ill has taught me one thing, it’s that you shouldn’t take anything for granted. So, I want to share my happiness with him. Is that okay?”

“It’s more than okay,” Kennedy replied. Her eyes flickered down to look at Ayna’s lips before she closed the distance between them. They clung to one another as their lips met, their tongues tangling together languidly. Although it didn’t last long, it was the most reaffirming kiss Kennedy had ever had.

“Would you like me to keep talking?” Ayna asked as Kennedy settled herself back against her.

“Please.”

The rest of the night passed with Ayna telling story after story until Kennedy had fallen asleep against her shoulder. Waking her was unbearable to Ayna, so she resigned herself to a night of sleeping right where she was. Despite how uncomfortable she was sure to be come morning, Ayna had never felt more at peace.

#ayna x mc #ayna seth #playchoices #foreign affairs #thanks for the request!#I'd already started writing one for prompt 11 when I got your ask so that was quite lucky #myaynafic

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francoiserenaldt · 3 years

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good things come to those who wait...

summary: there’s a boy and she doesn’t quite know what to do… (alternatively: melisande devereaux has really done it this time)

word count: 1.8k

warnings: none

note: would it be a fic written by me if the moon didn’t make some kind of appearance? probably not. takes place after a few weeks at vancross.

Vancross is silent when she sneaks out of her dorm.

Melisande took extra precautions to make sure that Tatum would be firmly in REM sleep—measuring his sleep patterns without looking like a stalker was easily the hardest thing Melisande had ever done and she once climbed a tree in heels for a photo op—and Murphy was a nonissue as long as Dionne was none the wiser.

The one thing she hadn’t accounted for was guilt. The possibility of Tatum being punished for her actions had only occurred to her in this and it made her stomach ache, but she swallowed it and continued to walk. She had already made it this far.

This whole situation was his fault, anyway.

She eventually finds herself in the gardens. The sole light hanging from the top of the gazebo blinks to life at her arrival—she couldn’t even avoid the limelight in the wee hours of the morning, apparently—and she sits under the light and takes a breath.

The speech she wrote sits in her back pocket. It’s awful even by her standards, but it’s the product of rushed scribbles in between classes and right before she went to sleep. She’s loath to imagine what would happen if any one of the numerous people surrounding her found out about this, but her mind wanders anyway.

Blaine would, no doubt, tear it apart with a smirk, giddy with the realization that she knew Melisande was nothing but a sheltered puppet for her mother all along—Blaine wouldn’t say it that way, of course; despite a rivalry that spans over centuries and defies common sense, she’s oddly insistent on getting into Melisande’s pants.

Ayna would be concerned but supportive; the historian in her probably reckons that it would make killer supporting evidence in a collegiate thesis. Dionne probably would find it odd; parents controlling every aspect of their children’s lives was normal and resentment only hurt you in the end.

(Maybe she’d have a point.)

And Tatum...if Tatum got a hold of this, she would probably cease to exist on the spot.

Regardless, it doesn’t matter what everyone else would say if they saw it because they never will. Her reputation, her life even, depends on it.

She chuckles at that; it’s the most authentic speech she’ll ever write, but there can be no audience to receive it. She can only laugh to stop from crying.

The moon at Vancross is stunning this time of year, cool and quiet and drawing an odd feeling—too warm to be sadness, but far too cold to be wistful—from her. The scene was perfect, but it didn’t change the inevitable: Tatum would kill her if he knew she was out here.

She almost wants him to; anything is better than this torturous dance they’ve been doing since he appeared in her dorm room. Everything about him was “job description this, job description that” until she could get him alone; even then, he would only drop the act for a few minutes before it was back to wishing he had never been assigned to her.

(Her heart only broke a little bit when he said things like that, of course. She’s an adult.)

(If only she actually felt like one.)

She stands and quietly clears her throat. If her calculations are good, she only has 20 minutes until someone notices that she’s gone.

“I’m alone for the first time in a long time, so maybe I can finally put this weird feeling into words.” Melisande begins, just barely resisting the urge to fall into public speech mode. “I’m completely and utterly unsure of what I’m supposed to do with my life. Everyone has their own ideas about what I should be doing here. Mom wants me to come here and make the country proud by earning all of my marks, Dionne wants me to date, and Blaine...ugh, I shouldn’t even be speaking to her right now. I’m a grown woman and yet I’m letting everyone else tell me what’s good for me. The only person who’s fully respecting my decisions right now is...Tatum.”

She cuts herself off with a groan, crumpling the paper in her hands. “Fucking Tatum. I’m midway through articulating my quarter-life crisis and all I can think about is him.” She slumps down onto the bench, burying her face in her hands. “And I’m not even thinking about him, not really. The Tatum that wanted anything to do with me died overseas. The real Tatum is sleeping in his bed, probably dreaming about being literally anywhere else.”

A street light flickers on several meters away. A group of her peers chortles on their way to their dorms, no doubt drunk from some house party. She sighs, lifting her head.

“What did I expect, anyway? ‘Lisa and Tate against the world, like when we were kids?’ I barely want to be here and I’m actually getting something out of this.” She scoffs, sniffling. “God, I’m an idiot.”

The wind picks up then, pulling her waist-length braids to the side. The night is still quiet and there’s no sign of life anywhere near, but she’s never felt more exposed. “I don’t even know him anymore. And he doesn’t want to know me. He’s just doing his job. It shouldn’t hurt this much to see him again.” She purses her lips as the heat behind her eyes swells once again, but she blinks it back. There’s still too much to say before she has to go back to bed.

“But I have a job to do here, too. My mother is counting on me. Winston is counting on me. All of Rutherland is counting on me, so I won’t give up on them. I can’t. It’s out of the question.” She shakes her head violently. “But I won’t give up on him either. Not when I’m getting a little bit closer to seeing the real Tatum, my Tatum, in my life again. I can’t afford to screw this up. I can’t lose him again.”

Melisande tilts her head back and stares directly at the moon, letting the light reflect the pool of unshed tears in her deep brown eyes before she shuts them completely and lets the tears fall. “What the hell am I going to do?”

Off in the distance, a bell tower rings and the long hand of the clock beneath it settles on 4. She’d been out for far too long. It was only a matter of time before-

“Melisande.”

(Shit.)

“Lecture me in the morning, please. I’m exhausted,” she sobbed.

She hears him clear his throat, probably out of awkwardness, before he speaks. “Do you have any idea how dangerous it is to be out by yourself right now?”

“I think I could have handled myself against the flora and fauna, Tatum.” Melisande snaps, wiping furiously at the tears running down her cheeks. “Besides, late-night escorts aren’t in your job description.”

“It’s literally a part of my job description that I need to be near you or aware of your location at all times, especially for ‘late-night escorts.’” Tatum pinches the bridge of his nose. “What were you doing up this late anyway?”

“Writing a sonnet.”

“This is not the time for you to joke around.”

“So it’s only okay to switch up when you do it. Got it.” She huffs, brushing past him and speed walking in the other direction. “I’m tired. Let’s go back.”

He’s quicker, grabbing her arm and turning her around to face him. He takes her face into his hands, the fury (concern?) in his already intense eyes setting her ablaze. “You can never do anything like this again. Am I clear?”

“Tatum, you made yourself perfectly clear when you told me that you never wanted to be back around me the first time.” Melisande scoffs, meeting his glower with one of her own. “I’m the last person that's going to endanger your cushy government job, alright? Can we be done here?”

“We’ll talk about this in the morning.”

“Good. Now let go.”

The morning after is rough, to say the least. There isn’t enough caffeine in the world to make Melisande a functioning human being on 3 hours of sleep or enough outfit changes in her closet to wait Tatum out.

He’s not good at waiting—never has been—and he paces outside her door, as if he’s ticking down the seconds until she has to stop hiding. She can’t help but scoff; his method is questionable but the message is clear: I’m not letting you off the hook this time.

She eventually settles on a light blue blazer set and rushes out of her bedroom, making a beeline for the kitchen. Naturally, a toned arm blocks her way. “I need to get to class.”

“You’re not getting out of this.”

“I wasn’t planning on it, but fine. We can talk now.” She drawled, ducking under his arm and turning on the coffee maker. “You wanted to know why I left last night.”

“As your bodyguard, I think you owe me that.”

“I needed time to think.”

“Don’t you have a room for that?”

“I wanted to be alone,” Melisande replied nonchalantly, only managing to resist the urge to shrug when she sees his nostrils flare. “It’s hard to do that when you have a shadow.”

“What are you doing?”

“Talking to you,” she allows the shrug this time, turning her head to meet his eyes as she pours her coffee. “Should I be doing something else?”

“Let me rephrase that: why are you acting out?”

Acting out?

If Melisande was acting out, she’d have made herself a staple of the numerous house parties happening at Vancross. If she was acting out, she’d find Blaine Hayes and give her mother a scandal worth calling about. If she was acting out, she would have never agreed to come to the Vancross Institute to begin with.

She didn’t deserve this.

“You can’t be serious. I leave the dorm once to clear my head and you’re treating me like a child.”

“Melisande—”

“This conversation is over.”

“Like hell it is.” Tatum snaps. “In case you haven’t gotten the memo yet, you’re the daughter of a world leader, which means that you can’t leave in the middle of the night to clear your head on a whim without telling me. If there was even a one percent chance that someone who wanted to hurt you came here and I didn’t know where you were, I…” He pauses, then takes a breath. “I can’t do my job. It’s—”

“—your job to protect me. I know that.”

“Then don’t make this harder for me than it already is.”

The earnest look in his eyes—definitely concern now—is enough to make her drop the act. “Alright. I’m sorry.”

He grunts, blinking the moment away, and she curses herself for the disappointment that courses through her veins. “Don’t be sorry, be careful.”

“It’s too late for that.” Melisande shakes her head, too frustrated to cry and too tired to argue. “Far too late.”

It’s clear that he doesn’t understand what she means and she decides, then and there, that he would never know. The fates had aligned and made his position clear: she was an assignment to him. He could never know that she wanted more.

(It was far too late. For both of them.)

#foreign affairs #tatum mendoza #ship: tatum x melisande #mc: melisande devereaux

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