#at this point I'm also p sure it's normally difficult for me to eat as a trauma response (from my parents putting on anxiety-inducing

[lylahammar]

People always talk about how Laios is a character who gives fat vibes even if he isn't technically fat in canon which is very true, and I have some thoughts on that!! (this will be a long post lol sorry)

There's a lot of material in the dunmeshi extras that show how fatness factors into dungeon exploration, which shows that only the most skilled adventurers are able to keep weight on while in the dungeon (thank you to @savaralyn2 for the translations! links to the individual posts these panels come from are added on the pics):

So we know, at the very least, that most of the characters are kept thinner than they would be naturally through the strain of death/revivification in the main dungeon. We also see that Laios has some fat on him, which through the text means that he's skilled enough to at least keep some of his weight (which makes sense, he doesn't die very often in canon).

(to be clear this ^ doesn't constitute as "fat," he is built as fuck here he just has some fat on his body which shows his prowess as a fighter in this universe) HOWEVER my personal little pet theory/headcanon is that Laios actually has a difficult relationship with food! I know that doesn't make much sense at first since he's shown to eat a lot in canon, but hear me out. In pre-canon, before he reunited with Falin, he's shown to be extremely gaunt:

But after partnering up with Falin, he gains weight and looks much more healthy very quickly. Part of this is definitely because of his unstable living situation/mental illness, but he and Falin still live in very poor conditions after this and he still manages to gain weight/get healthier, so I believe it's mainly due to her making sure he eats enough. We also know that Laios is. most certainly autistic. Nobody argue with me on that it's like pretty much widely accepted as canon for a lot of reasons lmao. So my theory is that he's actually food sensitive. He's shown to not really care about food that isn't monster-related. Even when he eats regular food, he's usually imagining it being a monster instead.

He has never eaten squid before, which is totally normal, but could also support my theory in a way :P it being a monster still can't save it from the autistic sensory bad experience in this case, though.

So I think that his adventurous eating during the course of the story isn't because he's actually an adventurous eater normally, it's purely because of his special interest (monsters, duh). During his journey to recover Falin, he's able to build up a healthier relationship with food through Senshi's guidance and the involvement of his special interest.

By the end of the story, after he's retired from dungeon exploration and living in comfort/safety, and with his newly healthy diet, he's finally able to gain a lot more weight. Imo, his is a story of someone who's naturally meant to be fat, but is only able to reach that point when in a stable and healthy environment.

(for the record I know he's not that fat in this post canon comic, but this is only a year and a bit after the end of the story so there's still time lol)

alright I'm goin back to drawing now just had to infodump for a minute ✌️ keep it sleazy

#lyla's talking again #this is all probably common fanon but I just wanted to type out my specific thoughts on it lol #dungeon meshi #delicious in dungeon #dungeon meshi spoilers #delicious in dungeon spoilers #laios touden #long post #CW disordered eating

[thenerdcommander]

I swear my appetite on my period is like

Normal mealtime hours?  Can’t eat anything bc I have cramps, not to mention all food in any quantity makes me bloat and feel gross all around the moment it enters my body.  Appetite is nonexistent anyway.  Not hungry.  Food = sick.

At night when I can’t eat or snack, or when the meds kick in?  Hungry.  Famished.  Starving.  I have never had a single meal in my life.  But if I cave in and eat?  Regret all my life choices.  Wish I truly have never eaten a single crumb of anything ever.

#depression doesn't want me to eat adhd doesn't want me to eat hormones don't want me to eat #at this point I'm also p sure it's normally difficult for me to eat as a trauma response (from my parents putting on anxiety-inducing #and gory shows while I eat so brain associates food with bad things #I really just cannot have healthy eating habits can I #it's either I eat nothing or I eat very little OR feel sick or for about a week or two a month pre-mother nature #I can eat like a whole family of 5 crammed into one body #there's no in-between #I love flavors so it really sucks sometimes that my body likes to punish me for giving it fuel

[adhdpie]

I got diagnosed with adhd and was prescribed meds so that i can handle college. As a bonus I am loosing weight. I am 60lb overweight so I'm excited by the low appetite and the high metabolism, and I especially love the impulse control. (I used to eat a ton of everything because it tasted good and I wasn't thinking). I hear the weight loss stops quickly though. What usually happens with Meds and weight loss? Is this likely to be sustainable? Obviously it's not the goal here but I like the help.

(cw: dieting, weight, weight loss, weight gain. if these topics stress you out, I recommend hitting ‘J’ to skip this post immediately.)

I can tell you a little because of my own history with weight loss from stimulants but for safety reasons b/c this blog is public I need to say some things first to anyone else reading this:

i'm not a professional. I am speaking on this subject out of personal experience and research. you can easily duplicate my research via google most of the time.

do not ever take stimulants for weight loss purposes unless a doctor tells you to. ever ever ever

in fact don't take stimulants at all unless a doctor tells you to, in case it isn't really damn obvious how bad that can be for you

in general, being 'overweight' is not a function of impulse control failure. in fact, your weight indicates surprisingly little about your health!* long story short the stigma against being fat is bs

I also feel the pressure to Be Thin. but my point is: weight loss is a thing that many people want because society is dickballs. but know that being Thin(tm) is not the same as being healthy.

OKAY.

stimulants tend to suppress the appetite. nicotine, caffeine, and amphetamines all fall in this category. as long as you are consuming stimulants in sufficient amounts, you will not be hungry as often.

in adhd people like you and me, snacking on impulse can be a symptom of feeling understimulated all the time. stimulants often reduce the snacking habit by suppressing the appetite, which makes this type of stimulation less rewarding. in my case it happened without me even noticing for a while.

this often results in weight loss during the early stages of taking medication. but no; it doesn't last forever.

in my experience, many bodies can hit plateaus of both weight loss and weight gain - points at which calorie burn equals calorie intake - depending on a person's lifestyle. there can be more than one weight at which this is the case, and some people's weights are easier to alter than others. (and 'lifestyle' counts in a looooot of stuff besides exercise and how much you eat!)

you probably know a lot of this stuff already, but just in case: when weight loss is caused by low calorie intake alone - such as reduced intake because you've started taking a stimulant that suppresses your appetite, the first weight loss will be quick because water weight drops off, etc etc. but it slows, stops, and can occasionally even reverse when your body's natural tendency towards wanting all systems to be in balance - that is, homeostasis - starts kicking in hardcore. ';asldjf;salj we’re using the stored energy,' warns the systems in charge of keeping your systems in balance, which think they're playing a JRPG and are concerned that your extra energy might be needed for the final boss fight more than right now. 'we gotta cut the metabolism rate somehow!'** (and that somehow is partially ‘eating some muscle too so that the amount of cells that need energy is smaller’.)

if you are not making a concerted, specific effort to continue to lose weight, this is the point at which your body will find its new homeostasis and your weight will stabilize. (but a lot of factors go into what this point is and whether it's actually lower than your starting weight.)

in addition, your body will eventually develop a tolerance for the stimulant and it may not zap your appetite as effectively after a time.

In my case:

I smoked cigarettes for 8 years. no matter how much I ate or didn't eat, my weight rarely varied by more than 5 pounds.

when I quit smoking cold turkey 4.5 years ago, my metabolism dropped and I started snacking more. I gained 25 pounds, whereupon I got stuck again; eating the same number of snacks that had started the weight gain did not continue the weight gain. 

I lost a bit of weight when I exercised daily, but when I stopped I gained the weight right back.

when I started taking Adderall, a salt-amphetamine, to control my adhd symptoms, I dropped back to my smoking weight.  increasing the dosage of stimulants did not make me lose more weight. 

I expect that if I stop taking stimulants, I will gain those pounds back unless I make a specific, concerted effort to avoid impulse snacking. I will probably still gain weight because my metabolism will drop regardless.

so ...

in short, there's no way to use stimulants alone to continue weight loss at a quick rate. it can help you lose some pounds and keep those pounds off because of decreased appetite/better impulse control/higher metabolism, so you might quickly lose more weight than you would without a stimulant. and you can probably keep that quicker weight loss going a little longer if you make a concentrated effort to fight back against the appetite loss to avoid slowing your metabolism.

but nonetheless, your body will figure out how to balance itself with the stimulant in your system and weight loss will slow or stop. after that point more traditional weight loss methods will be necessary to keep dropping.

(notes under cut!)

*everyone has their own normal, which is affected by the food you have available but mostly by your genes, and people can be extremely healthy without being thin. and while being heavy is often blamed for premature death, scientists are now thinking it's actually sleep deprivation that's the culprit (tho being overweight can cause sleep apnea, which fucks up sleep p bad. but the cure isn't always losing weight).

**and if you're going too hard on the crash diets, you might even get 'dear god, there's no way to ever be sure of how many calories we're going to get in a day! Just assume no food intake for the NEXT 1 BILLION YEARS to be safe!', sending your body into 'starvation mode'. this makes continued weight loss much more difficult and just isn't good for you in the first place. do not recommend.

#adhd meds #weight loss #adhd102 #actuallyadhd #actually adhd #adhd problems #weight gain #health and weight #impulse eating #dieting #seriously be super careful #please #questionable advice #not a professional #Anonymous

[transssexualheart]

Hey b I know you like asks so answer all 200 because I'm just that nice :^)

FUCK THATS SO MANY 

200: my crush’s name is:as if you all don’t know at this point. it’s sarah

199: i was born in:2002

198: i am really:gay

197: my cellphone company is: i’m so fuckin stupid i’m not sure what the question is asking

196: my eye color is: brown

195: my shoe size is:eight and a half/nine

194: my ring size is:i don’t wear rings

193: my height is:5′5

192: i am allergic to:nothing

191: my first car was:never had a car

190: my first job was:never had a job

189: last book you read:hitchhiker’s guide to the galaxy

188: my bed is:small

187: my pet:is a beautiful orange cat named danny and i love her

186: my best friend:is lovely

185: my favorite shampoo is:i don’t care 

184: xbox or ps3:i’ve never played a ps3 so i guess xbox

183: piggy banks are:ok??? why are we trying to start piggy bank discourse

182: in my pockets:are trash

181: on my calendar:i don’t use a calendar

180: marriage is:alright?? i’d get married if my partner wanted to

179: spongebob can:?? exist??

178: my mom:is not very nice

177: the last three songs i bought were?uhhh i havent bought music in a while idk

176: last yt video i watched:for him.

175: how many cousins do you have?fuck dude. so many. i don’t know.

174: do you have any siblings?two, a brother and a sister

173: are your parents divorced?well my parents tried to get divorced but my dad died before it actually got worked out and my mom and my stepdad aren’t married and have never been so

172: are you taller than your mom?i believe so  

171: do you play an instrument?yeah, piano

170: what did you do yesterday?not much, just sat around and then walked in circles around my house for hours and then hung out with my siblings in the yard

[do you believe in]

169: love at first site:no, what if that pretty girl u saw on the street is an asshole?? what if she’s racist and homophobic dude u don’t know her

168: luck:sure

167: fate:yeah i guess

166: yourself:haha no

165: aliens:ya

164: heaven:idk

163: hell:idk

162: god:idk!! 

161: horoscopes:idk they’re fun to look at 

160: soul mates: i’d like to believe in soul mates

159: ghosts:idk

158: gay marriage:gay marriage isn’t a fuckinhg cryptid, yes i believe in it i’m gay and i’m gonna probably get married

157: war:god fuck i don’t know

156: orbs:??????????

155: magic:could be real, might not be, who knows

[this or that]

154: hugs or kisses:kisses

153: drunk or high:never been either so

152: phone or online:phone, can text my friends whom i lov

151: red heads or black haired:black haired i guess

150: blondes or brunettes:someone’s gonna get sad when i answer this but brunettes

149: hot or cold:i don’t know actually

148: summer or winter:summer, it’s better than having seasonal depression added onto my normal depression

147: autumn or spring: spring

146: chocolate or vanilla:vanilla

145: night or day:night

144: oranges or apples:apples

143: curly or straight hair:curly!!!!!!!!!!!!!

142: mcdonalds or burger king:don’t really eat at either but if i had to choose, mcdonalds

141: white chocolate or milk chocolate?white chocolate

140: mac or pc:pc

139: flip flops or high heels:high heels

138: ugly and rich OR sweet and poor:wtf 

137: coke or pepsi:don’t really drink soda

136: hillary or obama:man i don’t know too much about politics all i know is that i’d choose hillary over trump any day

135: buried or cremated:man i’m not sure,, i guess i’d prefer to be cremated Please Rid The World Of My Horrible Body

134: singing or dancing:singing

133: coach or chanel:i have like fifty cents do you think i can afford that shit

132: kat mcphee or taylor hicks:who

131: small town or big city:i love the city, maybe that’s because i live in a small town but i love the city

130: wal mart or target:target

129: ben stiller or adam sandler: idk

128: manicure or pedicure:well i don’t want anyone touching my feet i don’t even like taking my socks off around friends unless i very much trust them

127: east coast or west coast:well i live on the east coast so

126: your birthday or christmas:my bday bc we go on vacation for it bc it’s over the summer

125: chocolate or flowers:flowers

124: disney or six flags:never been to disney so six flags

123: yankees or red sox:sport???

[here’s what i think about]

122: war:didn’t another question p much ask the same thing

121: george bush:idk??

120: gay marriage:p much already been asked bud

119: the presidential election:not my president can’t believe u fuckers let trump win

118: abortion:if someone wants an abortion, they should be able to get it. no one else should have a monopoly over that, not even the father, because their body does not belong to him.

117: myspace:never used it

116: reality tv:eh

115: parents:some are good, mine i am not fans of

114: back stabbers:i don’t think i’ve ever really been backstabbed

113: ebay:it’s ok?

112: facebook:don’t really use it

111: work:don’t have a job

110: my neighbors:i don’t talk to them much but everytime we go near their dogs on the otherside of the fence they call the dogs back or pull them away one of the kids went “haha you can’t touch our dogs” and?? idk why??

109: gas prices:i don’t drive

108: designer clothes:can’t afford them

107: college:haven’t been 

106: sports:Throw Ball

105: my family:my sister is lovely, my brother is really mean, and my parents are also p mean like i don’t realize sometimes until i tell something they said and they’re like “??? that’s really not ok??”

104: the future:hasn’t happened yet how would i know

[last time i]

103: hugged someone:earlier today i hugged my aunt because she’s over for easter

102: last time you ate:just ate a tootsie roll a lil bit ago

101: saw someone i haven’t seen in a while:i guess the only person i haven’t seen very recently is spence and the last time i saw him was a few weeks ago

100: cried in front of someone:long time ago

99: went to a movie theater: went to see beauty and the beast a while back but i don’t remember exactly when that was

98: took a vacation: last summer

97: swam in a pool:last summer at my aunt’s probably 

96: changed a diaper:many years

95: got my nails done:i painted a clear coat on them a lil while back does that count

94: went to a wedding:year or so ago?

93: broke a bone:never broken any bones

92: got a piercing:when i was like five

91: broke the law:idk

90: texted:a few mins ago

[misc]

89: who makes you laugh the most:hahah. u

88: something i will really miss when i leave home is:oh man. all my friends, hubbard hall, the school playground, as much as i wanna leave this town i’ll probably cry leaving it behind

87: the last movie i saw:moana!

86: the thing that i’m looking forward to the most:death

85: the thing i’m not looking forward to:school starting again

83: the most difficult thing to do is:tell someone you’re in love with them

82: i have gotten a speeding ticket:never??

81: my zodiac sign is:leo

80: the first person i talked to today was:probably my mom

79: first time you had a crush:seventh grade

78: the one person u can’t hide anything from:apparently you because u always figure me out

77: last time someone said something you were thinking: yesterday, spence was talking about how his bf had big hands and i said “u know what they say” and i was about to say “big gloves” but he beat me to it

76: right now i am talking to:i’m not talking i’m typing

75: what are you going to do when you grow up:idk

 74: i have/will get a job:i don’t?? know??

73: tomorrow:is easter

72: today:is not easter

71: next summer:??

70: next weekend:idk man??

69: i have these pets:one cat, two fish

68: the worst sound in the world:chEWING

67: the person that makes me cry the most is:haha

66: people that make you happy:my friends

65: last time i cried:about a month ago

64: my friends are:the best!!!

63: my computer is:alright

62: my school:is the fucking worse

61: my car:is non existent

60: i lose all respect for people who:support trump

59: the movie i cried at was:i cried over the shitty mario movie when i was seven

58: your hair color is: dark brown

57: tv shows you watch:i don’t really watch tv

56: fav website:i dont kno

55: your dream vacation:to go to the beach with friends

54: the worst pain i was ever in was:emotional

53: how do you like your steak cooked:well not burnt

52: my room is:alright

51: my fav celebrity is:does dan avidan count? he still holds a special place in my heart

50: where would you like to be:my answers for these kinds of qs are always so gay 

49: do you want children:used to not want them, but i guess depending on the person i’d have them with i MIGHT

48: ever been in love:ya

47: who’s your best friend:asdgkjgf

46: more guy friends or more girl friends:many of us are nb

45: one thing that makes you feel great is:being loved

44: one person you wish you could see right now:u know, u all know who

43: do you have a five year plan:???????

42: have you made a list of the things to do before u die:1. kiss a girlthat’s it

41: have you prenamed your children:no

40: last person i got mad at:probably my brother

39: i would like to move to:nyc

38: i wish i was a professional:animator

[my favs]

37: candy:sweedish fish and jolly ranchers

36: vehicle:idk

35: president:i only remember obama

34: state visited:idk

33: cellphone provider:also idk

32: athlete:don’t pay attention to sports

31: actor:i don’t freakin know

30: actress:well,

29: singer:wELL,,

28: band:not sure

27: clothing store:idk

26: grocery store:hannaford??

25: tv show:no idea

24: movie:so many good movies

23: website:i think this was already asked??

22: animal:not sure

21: theme park:only ever been to like one

20: holiday:xmas

19: sport to watch:uhh i guess soccer?? i’ll actually understand whats happening so

18: sport to play:also soccer

17: magazine:don’t read them

16: book:carry on

15: day of the week:saturday

14: beach:no specific one i just like the beach

13: concert attended:only ever been to one, it was a top concert

12: thing to cook:grilled cheese

11: food:not sure

10: restaurant:idk

9: radio station:don’t really listen to the radio

8: yankee candle scent:??? idk???

7: perfume:don’t really wear it

6: flower:roses or tiger lillies

5: color:blue

4: talk show host:i don’t know??

3: comedian:bo burnham

2: dog breed:shiba inu

1: did you answer all of these truthfully?ya

i didn’t move the whole time i answered all 200 help me

#ask tag

[healthandfitnessrecipes-blog]

3 Reasons I'm Attempting to Forgive the Doctor Who Hurt Me

https://healthandfitnessrecipes.com/?p=6168

Find a person who lives with a chronic illness, and you’ve found a person who likely has a story about a doctor who has wronged her.

As someone who has seen all sorts of doctors to treat my chronic daily headache and chronic migraine, I have many of these stories. One is particularly painful to remember:

I was a third-year teacher and my already-chronic migraines had begun spiraling out of control. I sat in my new neurologist’s office, involved in the most ridiculous conversation I’ve ever had. He had just handed me several boxes of eletriptan samples (a common migraine abortive drug) even though I already had a prescription.

“Isn’t it bad to take more than nine triptans a month because it can cause rebound headaches?” I protested.

“Yes,” he agreed. But basically his rationale was, “It’s not the smartest thing to do. But you say you are getting bad headaches almost every day, and this will help. So take it.”

I remember sliding the stack of little blue boxes across his oak desk in defiance, “Well if you say it’s unsmart, I am not going to do it.”

He slid the little blue boxes back to me, holding his ground that this wasn’t the “smartest” thing to do, but that I should just do it anyways.

Several minutes into this absurd back-and-forth, small frustrated tears formed in my eyes. I expressed that I already felt so helpless due to my increasing pain, and that this was just making it all so much more confusing.

His response was to first recommend psychiatric help. I remember his cold, sharp words, “I can probably help you with the headaches, but I can’t help you with your emotions” (turns out, he couldn’t help me with either!). He also called in his secretary to “see if he was making sense” with his entirely contradictory advice. At this point — it was all a blur. The clearly uncomfortable blonde lady watched me sob as the neurologist repeated his ramblings. I had never been so humiliated.

While this was certainly the climax, this was not the only time I felt degraded by this guy. Don’t ask me why I continued to see him for months afterwards — I can barely devise a logical explanation beyond extreme desperation. I remember months later, he had told me that it seems like the migraines were getting better despite me telling him they were not getting better at all. His office notes even regurgitate this illogical sentiment! Was it because I hadn’t cried in his office again and seemed “sane” that he assumed I was all better? I suppose if I show emotion, I am just “crazy” and my pain shouldn’t be taken seriously. And if I don’t appear that I am hurting, then I’m probably not that sick to begin with, and once again, my pain shouldn’t be taken seriously.

Clearly, I have pent-up resentment, even though this all took place over a year ago. When I walk through the events in my mind, I feel such extreme anger. There is only one possible solution I can attempt in order to relieve such intensely ugly feelings, and it’s going to be really really hard: I have to forgive him. In my mind, I have already obsessively ran through all of the reasons I should hate him — and sure, many are totally justified. But it’s probably only fair that I give the other side a shot and run through some bigger reasons to forgive the doctors who hurt us.

1. All humans need and rely upon forgiveness.

I may not have made a 24-year-old woman cry in my office by condescending her,  but I’ve done many other things that need forgiving. Often when I am in pain, I lash out at people who love me and are only trying to help. I retort their positivity with sarcasm and pick fights. Often I have to remind myself of my mantra: Being in pain does not give you the right to be a jerk. Then I have to apologize.

But my doctor never apologized, so he doesn’t deserve my forgiveness, you may be thinking.

Have you apologized to every single person you’ve ever done something wrong to? I do my best, but the other night, as I laid in bed, I realized something nasty I said about another girl back in middle school. And for whatever reason, it took 12 entire years for me to remember, realize just how ugly it was, and feel badly for it. Now I hope and assume that girl isn’t lying in bed also, and hating me for what I did. And what a beautiful assumption to be able to make — that there comes a point where you can let things go even if that person didn’t explicitly apologize. Time makes it easier to forgive, but if we could condense the process, I think we’d all be a lot less anxious and angry.

And another point — even when we do apologize, do we ever really deserve forgiveness? I know that sounds harsh, but think about it. I’m sure we can all think of more serious wrongs we’ve done to people we love. Hopefully some of those people have forgiven us — but do those people actually owe us that? When we knowingly do something selfish or unfair to another human, do we really ever deserve her forgiveness? Often times when I am forgiven, I am grateful, but still feel a little guilt. I feel like I still owe that person something, and that’s probably because I don’t totally deserve to be absolved — I still did that wrong thing and I can never take it back.

Maybe the best way to expel guilt for your wrongdoings is to forgive someone else’s wrongdoings. Maybe that’s how we settle these debts. The question isn’t: Does my doctor deserve my forgiveness? The question is: Will I forgive my doctor anyway?

2. Our medical system is broken, and that’s probably not the doctor’s fault.

As a former teacher, I am afraid of where our education system is headed. Kids often barely know how to read. Schools seem to never have enough staff or resources. And parents often bully teachers when their precious angel child is failing because she never does her homework. An individual teacher may be phenomenal, but he is working within a broken system and his power will always be limited. Teachers have to follow the rules of the district, even when they are illogical and counterproductive. Teachers can’t force parents to care about their child’s education. Teachers can do some good, but can’t fix everything for everyone.

I think I need to recognize the same thing is going on for doctors within our medical system. My neurologist did try many tests to identify the problem, but everything was normal. He had run through the gambit. And while assuming your patient must just be emotionally unstable when you can’t fix her pain is highly arrogant, he was probably just out of guesses.

When a doctor fails to find a root cause, they may unfortunately just throw a myriad of medications your way to suppress the symptoms. I constantly ask doctors things like, could it be Lyme? Could it be related to my celiac disease? Could it be the foods I am eating? What I receive in response is always the same: “Probably not. Let’s try this medication next.”

But here’s the thing: that is all the doctors know to do for me. They went to medical school and learned finite information about how the body works. If your doctor has already tested for all the diseases and everything looks normal, he simply does not know the root cause. Also, medical conditions are segregated based upon specialist practices — as frustrating as it is, a neurologist knows very little about celiac disease. And for whatever reason, no medical doctor has been able to help me with nutrition or elimination diets in the slightest — clearly that’s not in their tool bag either. At this point, all they know is that a person is still reporting great suffering and so maybe one of these medications (that they did learn about in medical school) will help them feel better.

I am sure if my neurologist had had a magic wand to heal all my health problems, he’d wave it in an instant (and not just to get rid of me). I obviously wouldn’t have hesitated waving my education wand if it would have helped my students. I think we need to remember that doctors genuinely do want you to feel better. They’re doing all they know to do within a broken system. Their intentions are likely pure even if their actions and words are sometimes misguided.

3. You deserve peace of mind and are capable of achieving this through forgiveness.

Forgiveness is often difficult when people really poke at our wounds. I think the reason my neurologist offended me so deeply is because I was concerned about my own pscyhological health. My headaches kept getting worse and worse, my OCD was having flare-ups as a result, and a little part of me was wondering: Maybe this is what going crazy feels like. My neurologist had confirmed this hypothesis and confused me even more, and that really hurt; he unknowingly preyed upon my deepest insecurities.

Just like applying hydrogen peroxide and a Band-aid to a bad cut, we need to tend to our psychological wounds, too. A good way of starting to do so is remembering you deserve peace. Think of the daily battles you face, living with chronic illness. Think of how brave you are, dealing with sickness, fatigue, and pain day-in and day-out. You are clearly tough as hell, which means forgiving your doctor is just another hurdle. It’s a challenge, no doubt, but letting go of that little black ball of hate can free your heart for more productive and positive experiences.

As many have already discussed, not allowing your chronic illness define you is key. Similarly, not allowing your emotions– especially hate, anger, and hurt — define you is as equally important. We may not be in control of our illnesses. We are certainly not in control of the doctors who sometimes do more harm than good. But we still have full control over our beliefs, attitudes, and actions — and I strive to exercise this control in a way I can feel proud of.

Editor’s note: June’s My Mighty Month challenge is practicing forgiveness. Click here to join the challenge.

Credits: Original Content Source