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#asexual life
wrenthemoose · 1 year
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happy ace week 💜🖤💜🖤
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weepingpeachdragon · 1 year
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Okay. So, if you don’t know, asexuals never fantasize about real people in sexual context. It’s just something we don’t do, and I have never understood why someone would want to do that.
However, something we do do, is read fanfiction. It obviously depends on the contents, and the way its written, but even a sex-repulsed ace like me can handle a smutty fanfic most of the time.
The point is, here I was, reading a slightly smutty Merthur fanfic, when it hit me. I was picturing the characters as I read, which is obviously nothing wrong with, it’s what you do when you read fanfiction, however, unlike animated characters, these characters had been played by real life actors. Real people. I was essentially imagining real people doing THOSE things. 🤯
I’m equally amused and horrified by this fact.
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greenteaandtattoos · 3 months
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A traditional "knight saves the princess" story except at the end, the princess sighs and goes, "I suppose you want my hand in marriage as a reward" and the knight goes, "Oh, no, I'm just new in town and wanted to make friends but I've got really bad social anxiety" and the princess is like, "Rad, because I was never gonna fall in love with you" and they live happily ever after as besties (they're both aroace).
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itistimetodisappear · 2 months
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Yes we've all heard aroace people complain about the 'you haven't met the right person' line. But to the idiots citing this as the reason aroace people 'aren't oppressed’: No, micro aggressions aren't what's oppressing us.
I could talk about corrective rape, but I'm not going to because that's not what scares me the most. The worst thing about being aroace (aromantic, and asexual to a certain extent) is that society is set up for couples.
Being aromantic is a crushing economic disadvantage. As a couple, you can save more. As a legal couple, you can borrow more. This puts Mortgages out of reach for a lot of aromantics. Adopting too. Although aro people can adopt, you must have a similar income to a couple, which again, rules out a lot of aros. Don't forget Immigration, spousal visas will never be an option for us.
Being poor and aro means you're denied housing, family, international movement, basically anything that allos of a similar income would get. And anything you can get, you'll have to jump through many more hoops for. But we can't fix this by legalising aro marriage, like we did for the gays. Until our society's economic system is completely revolutionised, we'll be waiting.
It's impossible to compare oppression. You can't objectively say which minority group has it worse and I really mean that. But also I'd rather be called slurs and hated by Christians all fucking day.
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uncanny-tranny · 8 months
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Amatonormativity has destroyed so many people's understanding and acceptance of themselves, and it's heartbreaking.
Yes, it is normal to be in your 20s, 30s, or older and not have lost your virginity, had a first kiss, or a partner. It is normal to say that you aren't ready for those things, too! It is normal if your life doesn't follow the "college graduate -> engagement -> buying a home -> 2.5 kids and a dog" trajectory that so many people have idealized.
So many people associate maturity with losing your virginity, or having a first kiss, or a serious relationship, and I think that's a dangerous association. Maturity isn't gained through those things, and you don't have to have those experiences to be considered "mature" or "grown." It is not a bad thing to go at your pace. Nobody else can live your life but you. If you end up having those experiences, that's great! But it should be done because you want to experience them, not because you feel "broken" and "immature" without them.
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silvermoon424 · 7 months
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I'm so fucking sick of amatonormativity dude. Someone on Reddit left a comment that was basically like "the majority of people need a romantic relationship to be happy, it's how we're wired" and I responded saying that I disagreed and that more and more people (especially women) are finding fulfillment in other relationships and are happy being single.
I got heavily downvoted.
Of course most people like being in a committed relationship, but you don't have to be aromantic or asexual to enjoy being single. Maybe more people would like being single if we as a culture stopped pushing the narrative (especially on women) that being single is lonely, horrible, and depressing and that you need a romantic partner to be a complete person.
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dam-bluecookies · 3 months
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"that's not very aromantic of you" "that's not very asexual of you" WELL that's not very minding your own business of you
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fiadhaisteach · 1 month
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This popped out of me today.
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Happy Aromantic Spectrum Awareness Week
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soup-child · 4 months
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I'm aroace because kids made fun of each other for having crushes in elementary school and I went I'm not making that mistake
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vroomvroomwee · 7 months
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Does anyone else feel lonesome?
Not lonely. Not alone. Just... lonesome. Like you don't feel connected to anyone. Like you never feel that you will find anyone that understands you, that will see you truly, let alone someone who will even like you. You see friends everywhere, but you don't see yourself in their place, like that is not for you, like you're not made for that and that's not made for you. You see people having fun and laughing and dancing and getting drunk and falling in love and you just... don't feel that for yourself. Like you're not supposed to have that, like you can't because it's not for you and you're not for it.
Like you're supposed to be seeing all these beautiful things in the world but not experience them yourself. Like you want to experience so much, experience everything, but be overwhelmed by it so you don't do any of it.
Like you want to be everywhere and do everything, but you don't belong anywhere and can't do anything. Like you're not supposed to be here. Not in a self-deprecating way but in an incongruous way. You want to live you want to be alive, but you feel you're not supposed to be. Not here at least, not like this. Just a presence in the world, not an active member of it. Even your body doesn't feel like home, your face isn't a face you recognise, like you're not supposed to have either. Like you're just supposed to be.
Like you're supposed to observe, but not experience.
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redysetdare · 24 days
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I'll never understand why people assume that something being a phase is a bad thing, especially when it comes to identity. because the thing is that our lives are made up of phases - they always have and always will. nothing, and i mean nothing, stay's completely the same forever. it's always changing ever so slightly - we are always changing ever so slightly.
We grew up in phases. We would grow up and maybe we liked robots as a kid but then as we grew up we instead decided dinosaurs were cooler - you didn't see people getting up in arms about how a kid liking something was just a phase and why that made their experience with that interest invalid.
We grow up choosing random jobs that we think would be cool as a kid but then as we get older we tend to choose something completely different - no one ever shut down those dream jobs for kids because it's understood that changing your mind isn't a bad thing. It's not bad to say "i want to be an astronaut" and then change that later. No one makes a big deal about "how do you know you actually want to be an astronaut, though?" because that's seen as a silly question to be asking.
it shouldn't be any different for identity. "How do you know you're aromantic?" how do you know you're straight? how do you know you won't change your mind later and realize something about yourself as you grow as a person?
sure, i'm aroace now. That may stay the same it may not. I'm a human being who grows and changes just like you are. Just like we all are. that's the whole point, isn't it? to grow and change?
So what if being aro or ace is a phase. The experience isn't any less valid. it still helped build me as a person. my life was richer because of it, even if it was temporary. I'd rather grow as a person and be happy than feel miserable because I forced myself into stagnation.
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archivomeow · 10 days
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can we just all collectively agree that it is okay for aroace characters not to date or have sex if they clearly show no interest in it or repulsion?
can we respect that and not ship them?
or are yall too deep into amatonormativity…???
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shitpostingkats · 3 months
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When I tell you I fucking sobbed my eyes out.
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friend: I'm cold
me: here's my jacket
friend: I'm cold
me: here's my hoodie
friend: I'm cold
me: here's a hug
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turtleofthehollow · 1 month
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The best way I can describe how I ship radioapple is “intimacy through hatred”
They hate each other, they never stop hating each other, but they grow so used to each other that they look like they’re dating from an outsider’s perspective
Lucifer knows Alastor hates being touched, so he keeps putting his arm around him and finding any excuse to invade Al’s personal space
Knowing that Lucifer hates his opinion, Alastor goes out of his way to advise the King of Hell on all his problems. Lucifer especially hates it when it’s actually good advice, and has no choice but to accept it
They both enjoy pissing each other off so much that they can often be found laughing together, and everyone thinks they’re just having fun
Luci once insulted Alastor's culinary skills, and it somehow lead to them starting a cooking competition to see who was the better cook. It's been ongoing for years because they keep trying to poison the other, so they're never able to declare a winner
Everyone is super confused about their relationship, and insist that they're actually in love and just living in denial, but they do really hate each other, they just can’t explain it in a way that makes sense
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Due to that post I made re: why it's hard for aros/aces to imagine a future for themselves because society tells you a romantic partner will always take priority, a lot of people (aros/aces and allos alike) are sharing stories about how they have been discarded by their close friends and it's breaking my heart. But allos and aspecs coming in and sharing how they have the same amount of love for their partners and their best friends/siblings is healing it.
Still, there are people in the tags saying that aros/aces can "never offer their partners the kind of intimacy they need" and so they shouldn't be "surprised" when they feel closer to partners than their friends. You guys are missing the point.
The point is that we should NOT be ranking our relationships. People aren't there to be ranked on a scale of "This person is my number one and this person comes after that." The point is that you need multiple people in your life. One person cannot - and should not - be responsible for giving you everything you need. Different people will give you different things that you need in life and you should value all of them.
The idea that a romantic partner will give you every single thing you need in life is a toxic idea in itself and puts undue pressure on said partner and the relationship as a whole. A best friend won't give you everything either. You NEED multiple people in your life and they will all give you a part of what you need, but there is no one perfect person out there who perfectly gives you exactly what you want. We need multiple people and they should all be valued by you. Love is not limited.
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