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rk1kheadcanons · 3 years

Note

Markus and Connor are secret dating b/c Connor doesn't wanna be out to the world yet. The Jericrew (-Connor) go drinking and Markus gets *drunk* and starts rambling about his boyf after he rebuffs an advance made by a lady at the bar super sappily, but no matter how hard the others press him, they just get "oh, his eyes are the color of warm chocolate..." answers as to who this boyf is

You would never know Markus was drunk.

He didn’t stutter or slur when he spoke, he didn’t sway or trip over his feet. He didn’t giggle goofily or speak overly loud. He was perfectly composed, as much the charismatic android sober as he was when he was intoxicated.

What he did do, however, was go on long monologues like a Shakespearian stage actor.

Which would be fine, if Markus’ favorite subject to wax poetic about wasn’t his mysterious boyfriend, whom he’d sworn not to reveal the identity of until they were ready. Which would also be fine, if that mysterious boyfriend wasn’t Connor, who was often sitting right next to him (and slowly but surely bluescreening his way into that big Windows XP wallpaper in the sky) as he sang and lathered compliment after compliment, steadily giving away clues that were so blatant that it was a miracle that no one had figured them out yet.

Markus never remembered what he’d done the next day, and whenever Connor mercilessly played back his memories, his poor lover was as embarrassed as he was apologetic. Connor could hardly begrudge him (frankly he didn’t know what sane person on this planet could ever begrudge Markus, but that was just Connor’s correct opinion). What could they even do about it? Should he demand Markus consciously control himself? It wasn’t like Connor was any better at it. Give the RK800 too many AMB’s (Adios Motherboards) and he would be on top of the nearest table and scream-singing his every professionally repressed emotion, regardless if it was a karaoke bar or not. Hence why he never imbibed more than he could handle when they were around their friends. The last thing he wanted to do was sloppily propose to Markus after a long and terrible rendition of K-Ci and JoJo.

And Connor wouldn’t dream of telling Markus to measure the contents of his drink like Connor did. Not when his breaks were so rare, and getting him to relax and let loose was like pulling teeth.

It was just in the cards that their big revelation as a couple would be in a random bar at 3AM, with Markus saying something along the lines of “my boyfriend’s name starts with a C and rhymes with Donner”, and Connor had made peace with that.

“Scarlet woman!” Markus cried, at some random bar at 3AM, surrounded by their drunken comrades. Ah, would this be the night? Connor thought, on the correct side of buzzed as he watched on from the table right next to them, a heady mix of dread and amusement running through his computer soul. “Jezebel! How d a r e you solicit my happily taken hand!”

The waitress, who looked like she regretted serving their table, let alone attempting to get the number from the happily taken hand, raised her hands in surrender. “Sorry, sorry,” she said peaceably and with the calm air of someone who dealt with drunks as a job choice, “just trying to shoot my shot, ya know?”

Markus nodded at her magnanimously, because he was a kind and forgiving man even as a drunken buffoon. “Fret not. I pardon you of this most heinous slight, for if you knew the one to own my heart, you would understand that no other could compare.”

“Sure thing dude,” she said goodnaturedly, packing up and replacing drinks around their tables expertly, and parting with a “have a good night Romeo.”

“But who can no other compare to? WHOMST??” asked North, throwing her torso onto the table and looking up at Markus pleadingly.

“We’ve ruled out Jerry #451, Claudia, Baris from accounting, and Jerry #36,” Simon rattled off. He was looking down at a napkin that he had scribbled the names of all of their potential suspects. “I’ve got it. It’s Baris.”

North rolled her eyes. “We already said it wasn’t Baris.”

“Ohhh. Right, right.” Simon nodded his head and continued to not cross off the names of the people they had decided against, as he had been doing all night.

“How about you describe them a little?” Josh put in, reasonable, and therefore slightly less wasted than everyone else. “Hair color? Height? Eyes? Something?”

“Nay, I must not speak thusly!” Markus declared, back of his hand over his forehead and everything. “For if I were to tread down that forbidden road, I would surely not be able to stop myself from breaking our sacred oath of secrecy!”

“Oh my goOOOOOOOd I hate this fucking oaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaath,” North threw her head back and cried to heavens, which, considering her positon, was probably going to be hell on her neck come morning. “Come on! Break your oath! Be like Thor and wield oathbreaker goddamnit!”

“You might be thinking of Stormbreaker,” Connor added, the need to try and reason with alcoholics apparently embedded in his programming.

North narrowed her eyes at him, or rather his torso, since her chin was very resolutely still resting on the table. “If you think I’m thinking right now then you are drunker than I am.”

Connor lifted his barely touched glass to her in a toast because how dare she be lucid enough to clap back so quickly. A well deserved rebuttal fucking cheers.

“Glasses!” Josh exclaimed, snapping his fingers. “Do they wear glasses? That should narrow down some people.”

“That’s right! That’ll tell us if they’re an android or not. Androids don’t wear glasses! Our eyes are like...fucking...better and shit!”

“Unless….” Simon narrowed his eyes, pausing dramatically. “....they do.”

North gasped. Josh put his hands on either side of face, muttering; “holy fucking shit he’s right.”

Markus scoffed. “Their eyes do not hide behind paltry spectacles! His beautiful orbs, so soft and caring when his gaze lands upon my person, seeing into my very soul, are the warmest chocolate brown!”

‘Ah shit here we go,’ Connor thought, wishing not for the first time that he could just down his drink and join everyone else in blissful, idiotic cavorting. The soft, melodic piano and crooning words of All My Life playing over the speaker stayed his hand. Best not take any chances

“HE!” Simon burst out, tipping over in his chair. “He say he! Them is He!”

“Are we talkin’ Hershey’s or Dove?”

“Ghirardelli you fucking plebs!”

“Oi!” North banged her hand on the table so hard it left a handprint indented in the wood. It was one amongst many however, and not all of them left by their party. Such was the price for serving android drinks at a human bar - you either shelled out for sturdier furniture or the dents and chips became a charming aspect of your décor. “Don’t get spicy with us Sir Lancelot!”

“Apologies fair maiden,” Markus responded easily. He took her hand delicately and made a sweeping bow over it. “Alas, my passions got away from me.” He dropped her hand and whirled around, coat billowing with the movement and most assuredly by accident, placing both hands to his thirium pump. “Conjuring up the magnificent images that is the love of my life oft times sends my emotions into a tizzy! His hair; cloud like in my grasp as I run my fingers threw earthen chestnut tendrils - ”

‘Hhhhhhhhhhhhn so many adjectives Markus whyyyyyyyyyy,’ Connor wheezed internally. He didn’t bother trying to keep down his blush. Markus was nowhere near done laying on the compliments and he’d be subjecting himself to an endless loop of canceling the process. Besides, he could just blame it on the alcohol. Blame it on the a a a a a alcohol - wait no. What!? WHAT. Connor looked down at his drink and saw, to his mounting horror, that the glass was emptier than it had been a few minutes ago. Goddamn his automated rest mode cycle for transforming into fidgeting whenever he was nervous! He resolutely pushed the glass out of his immediate reach.

Nines, who was quietly sitting next to him, hunched over and taking notes on his own napkin, snapped his head up to attention when the glass brushed against his arm. His younger brother was looking from Connor to Markus, eyes narrowed suspiciously as Markus carried on. Connor didn’t like that look at all. It was always a risk inviting Nines to their little outings, the only thing Connor could bank on was Nines passing out - as his dear little bro was a notorious light weight - before his deductive skills could pierce through his drunken haze. Apparently Nines had chosen tonight of all nights, where Markus had never been more obvious about their relationship, to bloody pace himself.

If he could, Connor would be sweating bullets.

“ - a wit SO SHARP!!” Markus declared, foot now planted on his chair and shaking his fist to the ceiling as if it had insulted one of Carl’s paintings, “that neither an UNDEAD HOARD nor a POLITICIAN’S EGO could survive it’s precision strike!!”

“Brown hair, brown eyes, banger body, smarty pants, good at analyzing shit, likes animals” North listed off, holding a hand up and ticking a finger down. “Well that rules out all the Jerrys; they’re all redheads and they’re pretty aggressive about it - except for Jerry #86. Is your man-squeeze Jerry #86?”

“No no no last I heard Jerry #86 is dating Hatsume Miku’s bodyguard; Android Lucy Lawless.” said Simon.

“Tch. Lucky,” pouted North.

“Oh wow, she really kept that name huh?” Josh said, voice faint with wonder and disbelief. “That’s such a mouthful.”

“And who are you to question a Queen!?” snapped North.

“Huzzah and many blessings to the fortuitous couple!” Markus cheered, toasting a stein of frothy blue intoxication that looked as cartoonish as it did poisonous to the sky, knocking it back in several impressive gulps and slamming it back on the table. “BUT NEITHER OF THEM CAN COMPARE TO THE BEAUTY AND GRACE THAT IS MY LOVE!!” he boomed, louder and more British by the second. “WHO’S CURIOSITY AND INTELLECT A CHERISHED BOON TO I, BUT A WEAPON OF MASS DESTRUCTION TO HIS ENEMIES - !”

North slapped her hand on the table several times, the proverbial light bulb lighting up in her eyes - oh. No not proverbial. There was currently little lightbulb emojis pictured in her pupils. Yet another drunken download added to the bill. Connor was glad he’d drawn the long straw on ‘irresponsible buying duty’ tonight. No doubt there would be a lot of strange receipts to sort through in the morning. “Oh! I know I know! It’s Josh!”

So startled by this declaration/accusation, Josh jumped in his seat. “What!?”

“Brown hair, brown eyes, hot, obnoxious, smart - everything FITS!”

“...he didn’t say obnoxious,” Josh muttered, then physically shook sanity back into himself. “It can’t be me. I think I’d know if I was dating Markus!”

Simon leaned in closer towards Josh, arm on the table, determination in his mien. “But what if…” Without breaking eye contact with his friend, he smoothly cracked open his Thirium berry blast bahama mama banana punch wine cooler, and proceeded to pour it just two centimeters off from his glass, all over the table. “You don’t know.”

Josh was shook in the face of this evidence. North narrowed her eyes so hard that they were just closed at this point. “Highly suspicious.”

“No. Nooooo. No? No! Of course I’m not. Right Markus?”

Markus steepled his fingers together and cackled in a way that most people would find concerning, but Connor just found it adorable. He would saving that in his memory banks. “I’ll never tell~,” he sing songed.

“H i g h l y s u s p i c i o u s.”

“I know who it is,” Nines suddenly said, calm but with such confidence that he was easily heard amidst the ruckus. He had his elbows planted on the table, chin resting upon his entwined fingers. Steele grey eyes swept over the now quiet group, everyone waiting with baited breath.

“Grant us your wisdom ‘o soothsayer,” Markus whispered, eyes wide with anticipation and literally perched on the edge of his seat. Connor seriously measured the pros and cons of just throwing his portion of the tab on the table and yeeting himself out of the window.

“It’s Sixty.”

Immediately the room erupted into scoffs and hisses of disbelief. North gave him a thumbs down and cupped her hand to her mouth, letting a long, “Booooo!”

“Why are you booing me I’m right!”

“BoooOOooOOOOOoooooo!” Markus, Josh and Simon joined in.

Connor blinked, and suddenly felt all of his concerns about Nines’ being the lynch pin in solving this mystery evaporate. If Markus transformed into a C grade Shakespeare impersonator when drunk, and Connor subconsciously wanted to be recruited by America’s Got Talent, then Nines became a consummate dumbass.

“That’s it!” North exploded. “Ten dollars says it’s Jerry #92! I caught him in a wig once!” She stood up, her chair sliding back from the force, and slammed a note on the table.

Simon also stood up with equal intensity. “Twenty says it’s Josh!” He reached into his pocket and slammed its contents onto the table. When he removed his hand six lego pieces, a My Little Pony leg, and two actual diamonds were revealed. Connor hoped dearly that the bartender cut Simon off soon.

“It’s not me!” Josh said exasperated. He paused, then pointedly pulled out some money and threw it in the pot as well. “I put forty on Brenden.”

“Bull! Shit!” North declared. “Fitness guru Brenden!? No way!”

“He fits the criteria.”

“I doubt ‘How To Tell If An Android Has Welded on Parts from China vs Russia in their Selfies’ videos on his YouTube channel is the kind analysis Markus was talking about.”

“You don’t know that! He didn’t specify...”

As the two continued to argue, with Simon chiming in with some non sequitur, and Nines tutting about these ‘ignorant fools and their blindness to the evidence presented’, Connor looked over to Markus. He was quiet. He had his elbow perched precariously on the edge of the table, his cheek resting on his fist, a small hat (that was not there literally two minutes ago) was on his head, folded from one of the bar napkins.

And he was looking at Connor as if he hung the moon and stars.

‘How could the world not already know,’ Connor thought, soft and warm inside, happy merely to be in his line of sight, ‘When he looks at me like that?’

Connor picked up his glass and lifted it. “One hundred dollars on Sixty.”

Chaos erupted. Nines threw his arms up and hooted like he’d won the super bowl. Josh tried to explain to him how that was mathematically impossible. North shook her head and warned him that he would live on the streets with an answer like that. Simon pulled out a Yu-Gi-Oh! Card and said he would give him this Charizard if he agreed with him that Josh was Markus’ secret boyfriend. Connor withheld himself from trying to convince drunk people that this was not how betting worked.

Maybe Connor shouldn’t worry so much about their relationship being discovered after all. At this rate, no one would know about he and Markus being together until the wedding invites.

#Detroit Become Human #Markus #Connor #Markus x Connor #RK1K #emiliaf25🌻#emiliaf25 ask reply #North #Simon #Josh #RK900 #Markus: I bet 200 on Connor!#Simon: Pssh no way #Josh: Markus please don't waste you're money on throw away bets #North: Why don't you just bet on John Cena while you're at it #Nines: If Markus wants to give away money then let him #Connor: >:C #Connor: why do I hang out with you people...

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braden-holtbys · 3 years

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Yours Truly

A/N: Hey all! So, this’ll be my first spicy fic and I apologize for it being so long. I’m also sorry if it’s not that good. Definitely shoot a message or ask on what I can improve. But otherwise, I hope y’all enjoy!!

Warning(s): smut (condoms whomst?), very very small mention of baby fever(?????), language

Cal was laying on the couch watching some television as you walked into the living room to see how he was doing. The Kings came home late last night from an eight game road trip over two weeks and he didn’t wanna bother you. He looked over as you plopped down on the couch beside him.

“Hey babe,” he said softly as he sat up. “Sorry, I didn’t want to wake you up coming in last night.” You frowned a little.

“Don’t worry about it,” you replied, putting a hand on his cheek. “At least you’re home. I missed you.”

“I missed you too Y/N.” You wished to cuddle with him in bed, but it was too late and you had already knocked out waiting for him to come home.

“You hungry?” you asked, getting off the couch. His hand reached out to grab you, stopping you from going any further. You saw his eyes divert for a moment, maybe over to the shopping bags by the hallways, some lingerie peeking. You kind of hoped that it wouldn’t be so obvious, but alas. Not that you had much time to put it away or anything.

“Honestly, I’m not that hungry,” Cal replied as he got up as well. He looked into your eyes, wanting to ask something, yet he didn’t want to ask it. “I’m still kinda tired. You wanna watch a movie instead?” You nodded as you both went into the bedroom, laying on the bed where you have more room to stretch. Cal grabbed the remote to turn on the tv and to whatever channel was playing. It didn’t matter to you what the movie was, you were just happy that he was back. Plus, it looked like the movie might have been halfway through. You loved the faint smell of cologne and that he was your big spoon.

Cal was more handsy today, maybe it was because you’ve been away from each other for a little too long. You didn’t mind it though. However, while lying down your dress revealed part of your lacy bra, but you didn’t care if he saw it. His hands wandered to your hips, the hem of your dress, but ultimately stopped by your stomach. Cal’s breath was hot on your neck, giving you some neck kisses every now and then. Your breath hitches a bit when he nips at your skin, longing for him to mark you up.

“God, you’re so beautiful,” Cal finally whispered to you, sounding eager to get busy.

“You’re eager,” you said as you turned to face him, placing an arm around his waist.

“Well two weeks without you and touching you seems way too long for me,” he stated with a smile.

“I know baby, I know,” you replied, pulling him closer for a quick kiss. “I want you so bad.” There was urgency, yet there wasn’t. The touching, teasing, slow build up of wanting each other right now but seemingly hesitant to go further. “You can take off my dress now.” He pulled you in for another kiss, a much deeper one before pulling away to leave marks on your neck and collarbones.

The both of you getting up to undress, and while this is a forever thing, it always felt like the first time. And with a swift motion, he let the material fall to your feet. He paused before taking a better look at you.

“I don’t think I can wait any longer,” Cal spoke softly, freeing himself of his shorts. There wasn’t a need to ask how he wanted you, just as long as you both felt good. Cal seemed like he really couldn’t wait any longer for you as his cock was pressed against the fabric of his boxers. You came closer to him, helping him get out of his boxers too, his cock springing out already leaking with some precum. You knelt down to make it easier for him to face fuck you if he wanted. “Fuck babe----- oh fuck Y/N.”

Honestly, Cal loved it when you sucked him off, but was never rough about it. He always held your hair and was careful to not get anything in your eyes or your hair. Actually, one of his favorite places to come is on your chest. You licked the tip, tasting the precum right before you fully took him. Your head bobbed up and down, his moans filling the room, hips lighting thrusting to face fuck you. You choked a little as you tried to take in more of him.

“Y/N take it easy, ok?” You let up as you looked up at him, loving that he was looking at you pleasuring him. You loved it even more with the continual praises of how you were doing good so far. His thrusts became more erratic as he was going to come, but didn’t want to do it in your mouth. “Ah babe, stop-,” He groaned and you listened, taking his cock out of your mouth.

“Babe-,” you cooed, ready to take him elsewhere.

“On the bed, legs open wide for me baby,” Cal directed, gently guiding you on your back. “Shit-- babe you’re so wet for me, but let’s get these off.” He took off your bra and undies swiftly, looking at you with hunger and biting his lower lip. Looks like the undies were ruined with how soaked you were just from all of that. His hands wandered your body some more, gently rubbing your nipples with one hand and fingering you with the other.

“Cal, babe, oooh,” you moaned as he continued to finger you. “I love when you touch me like that. I really, really want you inside of me.” He smirked like he wanted to delay fucking you into the bed.

However, you still loved how good he treated you. The confidence boost, and the love and praised that he poured onto you, the self consciousness washed away with him. He lowered himself to eat you out, and lord, he gave oral like he was having his last meal. Your back arching as he hits the right places with his tongue, praising him on how good he is to you, and just about ready to come. You couldn’t help yourself, the sight of him between your legs was enough. His breath, his tongue, the rhythm, it was all getting too much. You couldn’t help filling the room with lewd noises, bunching up his hair, pulling gently as the both of you were riding the orgasm.

“I forgot how much I love the taste of you,” Cal said in between breaths, his mouth and chin glistening. You smiled, wrapping your arms around his neck, pulling him in for another kiss to taste yourself. “You ready for me now babe?”

“Yeah, you know I want you,” you begged, rubbing the tip against your entrance before fully going in. “OH fuck yes babe! Please fuck me till I can’t walk.” Moans drowned out the room, and honestly, neither of you cared now about who heard.

“Cal, ah babe. Please cum inside of me,” you choked out, begging for him to do it. “I miss having you fill me up with your cum.” You were still sensitive from your orgasm, but you didn’t care even if it was a bit hard to keep up with his rhythm. It couldn’t be helped though, you lifted your hips, him panting and grunting as he tried to keep with it. It was right there that you both fell apart at the seams, slowing to a stop as he filled you up. He kept your hips up for a moment before pulling out and laying on the bed next to you, the both of you catching your breath.

“Looks like the movie is almost done,” Cal joked. “I love you so much babe.”

“I love you too Cal,” you replied. “So you think this time was it?” He placed a hand on your stomach, rubbing circles with his thumb.

“I hope so.”

#cal petersen #la kings #nhl fics #ya girl really did this #also I couldn't come up with a good fic title #nhl imagines

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never-close-our-eyes · 3 years

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I have no idea who or what you're talking about but you said gay cowboy and I came running. Whomst are the children?

they're some ocs i made while playing red dead online obsessively! one is aiden, an irish trans+gay cowboy and his bf is jonah, a bi and biracial (black+white) cowboy (loosely inspired by multiple cowboys i've seen in-game). this turned out very long so the rest is under the cut 😌

going along with rdo's (loose) storyline, they were both framed for murder and sent to the sisika penitentiary. however, they chose very different lives when released/escaped. jonah chose to head farther south in the great plains to see what he could find. aiden went north and couldn't stay out of trouble.

they met in valentine, as another guy was bothering aiden in the saloon, and jonah decided he was sick of it. he knew aiden couldn't defend himself for the world. he was thankful he helped this man, too, because he was the prettiest boy he had ever seen. he couldn't even tell himself "you don't like the white boy that much" because he did.

the feeling was 100% mutual, because as soon as aiden got back to camp, he couldn't stop telling cripps about the "pretty and mysterious man he had met in valentine who lowkey saved his life because he was probably about to be sent through a window by a guy much bigger than him."

but they ran into each other again in blackwater and spent a lot of time together in the saloon. they would talk for hours, sometimes about nothing at all. one night, it was late, so jonah offered to let aiden stay at his camp for the night. aiden's poor gay brain short-circuited, and he said "yes" without second thought. of course this lead to mutual gay brain short-circuiting because jonah didn't think he would say yes.

things were awkward at camp, but they got through the night. they decided to form a posse after that called the dead eye double. it would get more member, of course, but it was a placeholder name for now. this meant they set up camp together in the great plains. their dogs and horses got along together very well, which was a huge relief! aiden's dog, jasper, had come to him as a scared stray, so he didn't know how he would react to other dogs.

the posse was going great. a few others joined (dawn, charlie, stevie, and amelia) and money was coming in steadily. however, rival posses still loved messing with the group.

an instance that really defined aiden and jonah's relationship was when aiden nearly died. stevie was hunting, and a lone outlaw attacked him. before he was executed, aiden shot at the outlaw without second thought. this was a mistake, though, as his aim was terrible, and he missed. the outlaw looked up at him with hate, giving stevie time to escape, so he ran to his horse (a silver turkoman named parabola) and kicked him into gallop.

although, it was too late. the outlaw was able to pick up their shotgun and shoot at aiden, it hit him: right in the gut. he fell off of his horse and to the ground, cradling the wound, trying very hard not to cry. it burned, like someone was sticking a branding iron to his skin. he thought he was done for.

that was, until stevie was able to get the outlaw hog-tied and placed on the back of aiden's horse. he went to aiden, cringing when he saw the wound. he was able to get him on his arabian, whistled for parabola to follow, and rushed back to camp.

long story short, jonah was pissed. he couldn't believe someone would just hurt aiden, who was the sweetest man alive, like that. he had the outlaw tied to a horse hitching post, and helped stevie carefully set aiden in his tent. it broke his heart to hear aiden's groans and cries of pain.

the gang managed to perform a hasty surgery, with aiden passing out in the middle of it. it hurt jonah even more to hear aiden's pain-filled cries, but it had to be done, especially when they found out it was buckshot that was planted in aiden's tender belly. they also found out cripps was an expert at using a needle and thread.

recovery was the worst for the camp. aiden stayed unconscious for a majority of it, which scared jonah the most. he just wanted to see his green eyes open again. he stayed at his tent, day and night, losing a lot of sleep. he wanted to make sure aiden was okay. it felt like his heart had been ripped out of his chest and stepped on. he really wanted to kill the outlaw who had injured aiden, to make them suffer like him, but he couldn't let his anger get the better of him. not now.

aiden finally woke up after about two weeks. he was groggy and sore but alive. jonah swore he was going to cry when he saw his eyes open for the first time and heard his voice again. he was so excited, he didn't know what to say. he lead parabola over to him, as the horse had been very worried. he helped him sit up so he could pet and talk to the equine.

this was when jonah realized he was actually in love with aiden. it was no longer just about looks, it was his personality, the way he treated others, how strong he was. as he supported his weight so he could assure parabola he was okay, he had a warm, fuzzy feeling in his chest. it only got harder to ignore when aiden said he didn't want anything bad to happen to the person who had hurt him. why was he so fucking nice it wasn't fair??

the very next week, aiden was up and walking again. every week, he allowed himself to perform more strenuous activity, until he was working with the posse full time again. they decided it was time to go after a huge bounty: the owl hoot family. they set out to rio bravo armed to the teeth.

they successfully brought in the bounty and decided it was time to celebrate. they set up camp just south of fort mercer and threw a small party. cripps had his harmonica out, amelia, charlie and dawn provided their musical talent, and they all had fun. jonah finally got the courage to ask aiden for a dance. aiden was flustered, but he accepted. it was then that they decided they were both very much in love. finally.

so the obvious courting began. jonah would leave bouquets of prairie poppies or texas bluebonnets at aiden's tent and went hunting for him sometimes, and aiden would write poems or draw stuff for jonah. jonah would pin this up in his tent, very proud of his new bf. after weeks of this, the camp was practically begging them to just start dating already. so they did! they were happy n very much in love :)

i will explain more later! i hope y'all enjoyed my rambling akdks

#ask #annes-adventures #danny's ocs #jonah x aiden

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ghostofwriting · 5 years

Text

Decisions: Final Part

Word Count: 6,606.

Warnings: swearing, angst, angst and more angst.

Mayhaps fluff whomst knows??

It’s the final part and I just want to thank everyone who put up with me and this story. Thank you for reading, commenting, reblogging, liking and sending me messages yelling at me about how much I hurt you. I hope this makes up for it.

They spend the days together, always seeking out each other’s touch. Always looking out for the other person, always brightening up when the other person walked in the room.

It was like being together again and in a weird way they were together. They hadn’t talked about what would happen after the trip was over but he was content living in the now.

He had suggested they don’t talk about what happens after, that they’re together right now and that’s all that matters. He’ll surely regret that later, but for now he doesn’t care because she’s in his arms.

They watch the northern lights separate from their friends, arms around each other. While the lights are beautiful his eyes never leave her face, her beauty always astonishing him.

He never stopped being whipped or in love but now it’s tenfold and he’s kind of terrified at the thought of leaving Alaska.

The nights are spent tangled under the sheets in each other's arms, sharing kisses until they fell asleep. He never wants to leave this moment. Never wants to not have her next to him again.

This is all he wants in the world.

_______________________________________________________________________

“Have you seen y/n? She wasn’t in her room.” Alli goes up to Alessia and Brian who are on the patio outside, sipping some coffee.

“Where do you think?” Brian wags his eyebrows and Alli sighs, sitting down next to the couple.

“Of course.” Alli looks towards the Alaskan wilderness, the quiet bringing on such sweet calmness.

Alessia breaks the silence, taken aback by what Brian just said, the implications just hitting her.

“Are they sleeping together again?” She asks, surprised.

“Yeah,” Brian responds and Alli nods.

“That's gonna end well,” Alessia says and Alli laughs.

“I’m not questioning what’s going on, all I care about is that Shawn is actually in a good mood.” Brian shrugs, sipping more of his coffee.

“He’s happier than he has been in a while,” Alessia mentions and they all agree.

“He’s with the person that makes him feel complete.” Alli agrees with that too, but she also knows how her friend is feeling. Knows that she isn’t sure what she wants.

“She’s going to hurt him,” Alli tells both of them, Alessia looks at her like she wants more information.

“I know.” Brian just stares into the distance, hoping that whatever happens, they both make it out alive.

They sit in silence and ponder what the hell is going to go down after this trip.

_______________________________________________________________________

New Years Eve is magical, they all make breakfast together and Shawn steals kisses from y/n every chance he gets. His friends have stopped giving them questioning looks and just started ignoring them.

They start drinking pretty early on so by the time the clock strikes midnight, everyone is wasted.

Shawn finds y/n kisses her so hard at the end of the countdown that he’s sure he’s bruised both their lips.

Her eyes are glossy with the alcohol but she’s all giggles and her hands are all over him and he’s never seen someone so beautiful and magical in his life.

Only her.

“I love you.” He tells her, going in for another kiss.

“Me too!” She yells leaving him slightly deaf but he doesn’t care.

_______________________________________________________________________

So they leave today and she probably should’ve chosen a different day to leave because packing with a hangover absolutely sucks.

It also sucks that whatever happened with Shawn this trip has to end and she has to be the one to end it.

She’s an idiot, she shouldn’t have let things go so far, but she’s weak when it comes to him.

She closes all her bags and leaves them in her room, while she searches for Shawn.

He’s, of course, packing in his room. When she walks in he lights up so much he could light up the sky.

He’s so beautiful her heart hurts.

When she sits on the bed, his smile fades and he sinks next to her, his hands not touching her. She already misses his touch.

“So it’s done huh?”

“Yeah.” She’s surprised at his reaction, there’s no fighting back and maybe it’s because he finally realized that they’re not for each other. That they’re done, that this weekend was a last hoorah.

It kills her inside.

“Have a safe flight.” He says and the lack of whatever she’s looking for is hurting her. She’s the one that wants to cry now.

“You too.” She goes to get up but he pulls her down on his lap, he kisses her softly and she mewls into his mouth.

“I love you.” He whispers with a smile.

“Me too.” She returns the smile that she’s sure came out like a grimace and gets up, leaving the room, him, and all the memories of Alaska behind.

_______________________________________________________________________

“You’re like okay?” Brian questions on the plane ride back to Toronto.

“I’m fine.” He’s buckling his seatbelt and he feels Brian till staring at him.

“You aren’t dying?” He guffaws and Brian is taken aback.

“No, Brian, I’m fine.” Brian eyes him suspiciously but lets it go.

He’s fine because all he has to do is ride the end of the contract out and then he’ll go find her and they’ll be able to be together.

Just a few months.

______________________________________________________________________

Just a few months turns into the next friends trip. She has been travelling non stop and it was hard for him to contact her so he decides he’ll wait until the vacation.

What're another few months? It’ll just make their reunion that much sweeter. Who wouldn’t want to get back together with the love of their life in Hawaii?

Except he’s notified by his new management that there’s a festival run he has to do that long weekend and since it’s one of the first events with his new team, he has to go.

So he tells everyone he isn’t going, that he’s sorry and that he’ll see them soon.

So what’s a little bit of a longer wait? He would make it his mission to find her after the festival run.

_______________________________________________________________________

Blake had begged her to bring him to meet her friends and when she found out Shawn wasn’t going she thought it was okay to bring him. She didn’t want to rub Blake in his face.

It’s at the airport when he finds out that Shawn is going, after all, something going wrong with the festival.

She’s in for a fun weekend.

_______________________________________________________________________

The festival gets cancelled and he’s giddy with nerves. His knees are bouncing up and down on the car ride over to the restaurant where he’s supposed to meet everyone for dinner.

He had made a quick stop at the house they were staying at to unpack his things in his room that he was sharing with Brian.

Brian had gotten there just a few hours earlier and was at the restaurant now.

In all his excitement Shawn left his phone back at the house and hadn’t seen Brian’s warning messages.

_______________________________________________________________________

When he arrives he all but sprints into the restaurant, he sees his friends and a big round table, all laughing and joking, when he waves to get their attention, Brian’s eyes widen and everyone else tenses.

That’s when he sees her, her hair is shorter than last time, and she has on a strapless blue dress that makes her look like a mermaid.

He smiles but it’s quickly wiped away when he sees an arm wrap around her. An arm that belongs to the blonde man he had seen in only pictures.

He stops in front of them and stares.

“Hello.” The blonde man says and Shawn can feel the lump in his throat building.

“Hi.” His eyes don’t leave y/n’s as the man reaches his hand out for him to shake.

“I’m Blake, nice to meet you.” Shawn shakes the man’s hand, his eyes still on y/n who is no longer looking at him.

“I just came by to say hi, but I’m not feeling too well so I’m going back to the house.” He gets out quickly and backs up, bumping into the table behind him.

He apologizes before bolting.

_______________________________________________________________________

“Excuse me.” She says quietly to the table and Blake, getting up to follow Shawn.

“Are you okay?” Blake grabs her arm.

“Yeah, I just need to see if he’s okay, smooth everything over and whatnot.” He nods his head and lets her go.

She runs out of the restaurant and the night air hits her, the air blowing through her hair.

She searches the peer for Shawn and finds him walking down a dock.

She runs after him, yelling through the wind.

“Shawn!” He spins around, charging towards her, he’s visibly shaking and she hates that she’s hurt him.

“Why is he here?” He’s so mad.

“He wanted to meet my friends.” Their chests are so close that she takes a step back so she’s able to breathe.

“So it’s serious between you two?” He inquires.

“I don’t know.” Tears starting to well in her eyes, she sees them in his too.

“How do you not know? Shouldn’t that answer your question?” He says it like it’s so obvious like she hasn’t been confused since Alaska.

“I’m so confused.”

“I love you. I have never stopped loving you. You are all I want. All I have ever wanted. There is no one else for me. Only you.” His words melt her, she wants to fall into his arms and tell him that he’s all she’s ever wanted since always but Blake is inside and she’s so scared of being hurt again.

“I love you too.” She shouldn’t have said that. She shouldn't hurt him more.

“Then what’s keeping us from being together?” He half yells and she’s thankful. Not wanting to draw a crowd even though there’s no one around.

“You have so many dreams and you think they can only be accomplished one way and I can’t be part of that.” She throws it at him, the only excuse she has to not trust him.

“That’s over! I told you that all of that is done, I’ll never do something like that again, I promise you.” He’s promising her, he doesn’t do that unless he’s following through but she can’t believe him.

“I can’t help but think that we were meant to be temporary. To help each other grow at such a hectic time. We’ve changed so much, our lives are headed in opposite directions, we have different dreams, we’re on different paths and I think it’s time we really let each other go.”

“Don’t say that. Don’t break up with me again.” He sounds so broken and she can’t believe she’s making him feel like this again.

“Maybe this time it’ll stick.” Her heart cracks at her own words because of the look on his face.

“You’re my dream! Our future together is my dream!” He yells, hands going up and swinging wildly.

“Shawn please don’t make it harder than it needs to be.” Her whole world is falling apart because of her own words.

“You said you love me, and I love you, we can fix this we can be together.” She doesn’t say anything.

“We can walk in there right now and tell him that you want me, that you love me. Please.” They’re both just about sobbing now. The dock is thankfully empty so they aren’t putting on a show for anyone, adding to any headlines that would come out the next day.

His hands are on either side of her face, his thumbs caressing her wet cheeks. He’s so desperate, she sees it in his deep brown eyes. The same eyes that search hers so frantically for any sign that she might say yes to being together. His cheeks are red and blotchy, the tears dripping and gathering at his chin in small droplets that she wants to wipe away.

She’s so confused. She loves him so much, but she’s convinced herself that they can’t be together because they don’t fit anymore.

And because Blake is good for her. Blake is similar to her and makes her feel like she isn’t about to fall off the world if he leaves.

But Shawn makes her feel alive. He makes her feel like she’s never on the ground, that she’s always flying and on top of the world.

She has to break both their hearts in order for them to move on.

She wishes there were another way.

_______________________________________________________________________

He had been saying for over a year now that he had lost all hope, that when she didn’t come back to him he had no hope, that when she left Alaska and told him that it was a one time thing, he had no hope.

But every time he built that hope up by reminding himself that there was no one else for him, that they would end up together, that the universe had its plans for them and that they had to grow away from each other. He didn’t understand it at first but the idea that being apart would make them even more perfect for each other grew on him.

So when he got to this damn island, he thought that this was it. That they would finally get back together officially, that she had missed him as much as he had missed her. That Alaska had meant just as much to her as it meant to him.

To his great surprise, walking into dinner with his friends and seeing his arms around her had knocked him on his ass, captured his breath and clawed at his heart.

This conversation that they’re having now, he feels it. He knows this is it, it’s now or never. They either get back together or it’s over forever.

He looks at her, pleads, and begs and tells her how much he loves her with just his eyes. He pushes all the stupid positive energy hoping that it will engulf them and form a bubble where they can finally be happy and safe.

He’s not prepared for the next words that leave her mouth.

“I don’t want you.” Alaska had helped mend his heart. It had patched it up and filled it with moonlight and renewed all the lost hope. His heart always beat her name and it never moved on.

To hear those words come out of her pretty lips shatters his heart once more, letting out all the light he held inside and turning it dark.

“Okay.” He can’t stand much longer, he feels light-headed and if this is what she wants, if she wants to let them be without one another for the rest of their lives, he’ll give in. He’s done holding out hope, done feeling like he’s drowning and being okay with it as long as she’s there to breathe air back into his lungs. He’s done.

So he walks away, leaving her standing there outside the restaurant with tear stained cheeks and with the pieces of his heart at her feet.

_______________________________________________________________________

When he gets to the house he’s thankful that he’s alone so he doesn’t get questioned on why he’s frantically looking for all his belongings and packing up.

It doesn’t last long when Brian comes looking for him, he finds him, hands shaking and red eyes.

“What are you doing?”

“I’m leaving.” He croaks out, his throat raw from the pain caused by the crying.

“We just got here.” Brian reminds him like he doesn’t know.

“I have to leave.” Everything is being thrown into a pile in his suitcase. It’s going to take him an eternity to close it so he starts hurriedly folding everything.

“Shawn, slow down, what’s wrong?” Brian puts a hand on his suitcase trying to stop him but Shawn moves it away.

“She doesn’t want me. She’s done. I’m done.” He’s so stupid. So dumb for coming here with so much hope.

“What?”

“She chose him. I thought that because of what happened in Alaska we were waiting for each other. I thought it was us. I was wrong.” He’s closing up his luggage now, trying not to rip the zippers off.

“You don’t have to leave.” He does though. He can’t breath when he’s near her and not holding her, he needs to go away so he can start whatever comes next with her, not by his side.

“ I do.” He continues crazily going around his room and throwing things in different bags.

“Shawn?”

“I can’t fucking be here.” He turns to Brian, hands flailing. His head shaking ‘no.’

“I can’t do this again, I can't, I can’t. I can’t watch her be with him, not when I finally had her back. Bri I can’t. I have to leave. I have to go. I don’t want to do this anymore.” The tears come and his breath is shaky but he doesn’t stop trying to get out of there as fast as possible.

“What happened to fighting for what you want?” Brian asks and he freezes.

“I have to respect what she wants and it isn’t me anymore.” He turns to his things, gathering them all up.

“What do you want?” Brian’s words stop him again and he pauses at the door but doesn’t turn to look at his friend.

“I want the person I love to be happy.” And he leaves. After all this time, he leaves everything behind.

______________________________________________________________________

When she gets back to the house, she finds out that Shawn’s left. Her heart constricts and her ribs ache from holding in her sobs. She smiles and pretends everything is okay until she heads to bed. She waits until Blake is sleeping beside her before she falls apart. She cries herself to sleep for the millionth time.

The trip goes by painfully slow, but soon they’re on a flight back to Australia where she’s supposed to be meeting Blake’s family for the first time.

_______________________________________________________________________

She’s been back from the trip for a week and she still feels like her heart is back in Oahu.

“What’s wrong?” Blake is doing some research for something, she can’t remember what it was. He had told her but she was half-listening when he did.

“What?” She looks up from her phone. Blake’s face blank.

“You’ve been off since we got back from the trip.” She thought she was good at concealing what she was feeling, maybe the feelings she was having were just too strong to even attempt to hide.

“Oh, I’m just tired.” She lies.

“Were you tired the whole trip too?” She looks at him confused so he goes on.

“You were off then too.” She shrugs and Blake closes his laptop.

“Oh, yeah.”

“I know you think that you hide things well, and for the most part you do, but I can see through you.” His body is completely facing her now and she feels hot all over.

“I don’t understand.”

“You followed Shawn out after he found out I was there.” He isn’t mad, he’s just calm about it, not blaming her for anything and that’s the worst part.

“Blake.” She wants him to just let it go, pretend that none of it happened so they can just move on.

“You talked to him and something happened because you came back in and your eyes were sad.”

“I-” He cuts her off.

“And then we got back to the house and he was gone and you cried yourself to sleep.” Fuck. She thought he had been sleeping.

“Please.” She begs him to just forget about it.

“I’m no one’s second choice, y/n.” She shakes her head frantically, not wanting him to feel that way.

“No! No-” He cocks his head to the side, he bites the inside of his cheek and shrugs.

“I’m no one’s safe choice either. I don’t want to be.” She’s still denying everything he’s saying.

“Blake, you are neither of those things-” he cuts her off again and she sighs.

“But I am.”

“I’m a safe choice because you don’t love me and that means I can’t hurt you.” She wants to deny it. Wants to tell him that he’s wrong, that she loves him and that she wants to spend the rest of her life proving it to him but she’s tired. She can’t lie to him. She can’t string him along because she doesn’t know if she’ll ever actually love him.

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be. We can’t help what we feel, what we want, who we love.”

“You love him. There are years of history, there’s longing, love, passion, and you have to go after it. You can’t be scared of feeling that again, life would be too boring.” What he’s saying is so right. She knows it, but it doesn’t stop her from being terrified of loving Shawn again.

“I told him I didn’t want him.”

“And he’s an idiot for believing you.” That makes her smile and Blake smiles back at her. That shows her that there are no hurt feelings.

“I can’t blame him, I’ve hurt him so much.”

“You’ve both hurt each other. If you think there’s even the slightest chance that he’s your one, you have to risk it all.” He’s right, but how can she do that when she’s so scared?

“You’re the best. “He gives her a cocky smile and puckers his mouth.

“I know,” she hugs him and let a few tears spill out, she hates that she has caused so much pain, to him, to Shawn and to herself, “now, go find him.” He pulls away and lets her go. She nods her head, thanks him once more and leaves his apartment for what could very well be the last time.

_______________________________________________________________________

When she arrives back in Toronto, she’s had too much time to think about the whole situation and she’s once again convinced herself that they’re better not together. She had told Shawn that she didn’t want him, she had purposely hurt him because she was confused and scared of getting hurt.

She had lied to Shawn and Blake, one of the reasons why she didn’t want to stay with Shawn in the first place. She doesn’t deserve to go crawling back to him, to rip his heart open once more and ask him to trust her with it.

He deserves something new, someone new who won’t push and pull and lead him on.

She’s an idiot, she knows that, and she loves him so much, so she decides she has to let him go and heal.

Without her.

This time is different, this time she knows it’s over because he doesn’t call or text, he doesn’t send her pictures of things that remind him of her. He doesn’t talk to her at all, doesn’t like her pictures or views her stories.

He’s out of her life and she feels empty.

What did she expect? That she could choose another guy over him and he would be there to catch her when she was ready?

No. He deserves better, they aren’t meant to be, they were temporary and it’s finally time to move on.

_______________________________________________________________________

He writes about 100 songs about her and asks his new management to let him release two. He tells them that after these songs are out in the world, he needs to go radio silent. That he needs a break to find his purpose, to learn to be Shawn without her.

They let him, of course with the promise that he’ll come back inspired and ready to record. He doesn’t know how long his break will be but they’ve given him at least a year which he is very thankful for.

The two songs go out three weeks from each other, he gets so many texts about how well they’re doing.

They’re doing so well because of the past stunts and he absolutely hates that everyone thinks it’s about the wrong person.

He’s leaving. He’s going off to who knows where because his resolve is weakening and he’s so close to cracking and going to find her. He needs to be far away, somewhere where there’s no temptation. Somewhere where he can’t use the internet or data plans. He needs to go off the grid and find who he is without her. He needs to plant his feet firmly on the earth once more.

He’s scrolling through his twitter when he finds someone has tagged him in one of her posts, saying something about volunteer work.

“Remember when @ShawnMendes and @yusername said they would go abroad and do humanitarian work together but they broke up instead?”

His heart aches at the words but scrolls up to see what the tweet is and it’s a link she’s shared asking for volunteers abroad.

It’s so ironic that the only way to keep away from her is through her.

So he clicks on the link and he immediately starts getting ready to set off on an adventure she had been begging him to go on for the longest time.

_______________________________________________________________________

The night before he leaves he’s a little tipsy. He went out with Brian and some of his other friends who wanted to throw him a farewell party but settled for a bar crawl instead.

It’s not like he wasn’t going to come back, he just needed some time.

One by one his friends tried to get it out of him and tried to see where he was going but he couldn't tell them in case they let it slip, he didn’t want to be found. The only people that knew where he was headed and how to reach him were his parents, his sister and Brian.

Brian kept steering his friends to other topics so they would drop it, unfortunately, one of those topics was Alli, which then turned into y/n. Brian was quick to stop it, his friends unapologetic, but his brain was already wrapped around her. The longing is why he’s leaving.

He wanted her, he would always want her. He didn’t know how to stop it, he just had to learn to ignore it.

He sneaks off into the crisp air and pulls out his phone, turning it over and over, willing himself not to do it, hoping that one of his friends would come out and stop him, throws his phone across the street and watch as a car ran over it.

But no one comes, so he dials the number he knows by heart.

_______________________________________________________________________

She’s been trying to keep away from the new songs, especially after Alli had told her that they were very much about her. Keeping busy only works for a while until she hears a snippet on the radio at a clothing store.

She goes home right after that and streams them both.

She listens to Alaska first and she cries at the memories it brings up. The way she felt that New Years being in his arms. There’s happiness in that song but it’s also sad because it’s about wanting to go back to a time that was so perfect and now can never be recreated.

She hopes it can be.

I finally felt complete under the cold moon.

The northern lights don’t compare to you.

Your hand in my hand, chest to chest and heart to heart.

Take me back to Alaska,

The first time in a long time that I've felt alive.

She’s been trying to get a hold of him for hours and has gotten no response.

She listens to Oahu next and this time she cries for how broken he sounds, how sad the words he sings are. She made him lose all hope and made him doubt himself and his love for music.

Tear stained cheeks, shattered heart at your feet.

I lost all hope and let in the dark.

Does it even matter anymore?

Music doesn’t feel the same if you’re not there to sing to.

Life doesn't feel the same if you’re not there to share it with.

She cries herself to sleep, she brought this on herself by pushing him away and not fighting for him, and now it’s too late.

When she wakes up in the morning she feels terrible. Her mouth feels like it’s filled with cotton and her eyes sting so much tears are gathering.

She rolls over on her side and reaches for her phone to see what time it is, she’s in the process of rolling onto her back when she sees that there’s a voicemail from none other than Shawn.

She yelps when she drops her phone on her face, moving out of the way but trying just as quickly to get it back in her grip.

She types in her password and listens as his voice pours in through the speakers.

His words slur a little which tells her that he had been drinking.

“Hi. I’m so dumb. I’m on another level of an idiot if I just keep coming back to you when you’ve told me you don’t want me. I guess every single part of me doesn’t want to be without every single part of you. I keep saying stupid shit like ‘I’m done waiting’ or ‘I’m all out of hope’ but the truth s that I’m always going to believe in us. And I might sound stupid and desperate but it’s the truth. I’m always going to love you so fucking much and I’m so sorry about it.”

He stops talking when a loud siren goes off but sighs and continues.

“I’m leaving for a little while, maybe to get some distance, maybe something in me will change and I’ll finally be able to be without you or at least survive without you. I don’t really know why I’m calling, I think I just wanted to get all this off my chest without hearing the repercussions. I would’ve hung up if you answered,” He laughs and she lets a small smile pull over her face.

“You can’t call me back at this number, I mean you can, but I won’t answer, at least not for a while.” He mumbles something about the machine cutting him off soon and hurries to get his next points out.

“You’re wrong about us being on different paths, we’re not on different paths. You’re my path and you’re always going to be my path. We’ve already established that I’m dumb so this will come as no surprise but I’ll wait for you. I’ll wait and believe for as long as possible, even if you never talk or look at me again, I’ll wait. I’ll survive and wait until you’re ready. That’s how much I believe in us. For now, for however long, I’m letting you go.”

The phone goes silent and that’s when she notices that she’s been crying the entire time.

She’s been the idiot in all of this, ignoring her feelings and his. The stunt was over, he had promised her that nothing like that would happen again and she hadn’t believed him, she discarded his feelings like they were nothing.

It’s one thing to put yourself first, it’s another to hurt the person you love most on earth in order to do it.

He said he would wait for her, and she believed him but she couldn’t risk being without him anymore. She had to find him.

She calls Brian about a dozen times, getting no answer each time before she decides to go over to his place instead.

_______________________________________________________________________

“No fucking way.” Brian tells her after the fifth time of begging him to tell her where Shawn is.

“Brian, please. Please!” She’s frantic, grabbing him by the shoulders and shaking the man.

“Why? So you can lead him on some more and keep breaking his heart?” She deflates, her cheeks soaked with tears.

“Of course not! I love him, I want him. Please.”

“You’ve said that before.”

“I’m ready, Bri, please tell me where he is.”

“No.” She internally groans at her friend, wanting him to understand.

“Look, I know that I’ve been a complete asshole, that I’ve hurt him more than anyone ever could but he hurt me too. And I’m not saying that to make us even in any way, I’m just saying it to get across that I understand. I understand that I’ve been selfish, that we both have, I understand that I don’t deserve him.” Brian’s eyes snap to her teary ones, his own filled with pity.

“I don’t. But shouldn’t he be the one to decide that?” Brian stays quiet, probably because he knows she’s right.

“We have both made mistakes, he’s all I’ve ever known, I’m all he’s ever known and I’ve come to realize that we needed to grow apart in order to be stronger together. This was some type of hard ass lesson that we both needed to realize that we’re it for each other. And he might have realized it way before me, but you know me. I always over analyze everything and come in with a strategy and when I couldn’t find one I panicked.”

“Did you finally find it?”

“There is no strategy to love, there’s only following your heart and my heart is wherever the hell he is so please tell me.”

“He’s right under your nose.”

“What?”

“Don’t you approve who volunteers? I just assumed you ignored it because you were really done.”

“He’s volunteering?” Brian just nods.

“I passed that off a few months ago, so I wouldn’t have known.”

“Yeah, it’s the only way he could truly be disconnected.”

“Where?”

“I only know he’s back in Kenya, don’t know exactly where.”

“I’ll figure it out, thank you, Brian, I owe you.” As soon as the words leave her mouth she’s running out to her car and making a few calls to find her missing in action boyfriend.

Boyfriend.

No matter how many times she had told herself that they were done, that he was her ex, that he was her past he had never really stopped being her boyfriend.

He was her future and she had to find him.

_______________________________________________________________________

He’s never been so hot and sweaty in his life. He feels like he’s melting, dripping sweat absolutely everywhere.

It’s worth it though, to see the difference everyone is making. To see how happy everyone is even in situations where most people wouldn’t be.

He gets it now, understands why y/n loves this so much, why she’s the most down to earth person he’s ever met.

Experiencing all of this makes him love her even more.

He only wishes he had taken her up on one of her offers of helping out together. He would have loved to see her in her natural habitat.

Surprisingly, even though this all reminds him of her, he’s mostly distracted from thinking of her throughout the day because of how busy they are.

“Hey, Shawn?” Lily, a volunteer waves him over.

He sets the bricks he was moving down and jogs over to her.

“What’s up?” He wipes sweat from his forehead and the younger girl scrunches her nose, making him laugh.

“Someone is coming in from town, they need you to show her around.” He frowns, it’s not like he was well known around here, and he had recently arrived so he didn’t know the place well.

“Why me?”

“I don’t know.” Lily shrugs, turning around and making her way back into the school.

Night falls when a car finally appears out front, everyone looks at him expectantly and he sighs getting up and going outside to greet their guest.

The woman has her back turned towards him when he sees her but he already knows who it is and his body is frozen in place.

She thanks the driver and grabs her bag, turning towards him.

“Hi.” He doesn’t say anything, he’s in shock that she’s here of all places and even more in shock that she doesn’t seem surprised to see him.

His heart is beating so fast it’s about to jump out of his chest and slap him in the face.

He subconsciously starts moving towards her and she does the same. Their pull always so magnetic.

“I got your voicemail.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.

“And?”

“And I’ve been dumb too. I shouldn’t have run away but I was so scared of your lifestyle and that it might cause us to separate again.”

He swallows, stopping in front of her, his breathing is slightly uneven keeping him from speaking up.

“I realized that I can’t be scared of loving you, I’ll just ruin both of us if I do.” He’s right in front of her now, she reaches for him and takes his hands into her own, squeezing them.

“I love you, Shawn.” Last time she said that to him, she made him walk away from her so he can’t hear it, not if it’s not real.

“Don’t say that if you don’t mean it.” His voice is clear, he isn’t shaking or crying, for the first time he’s standing his ground. He needs to be one hundred per cent sure that this is what she wants.

“I love you.” She says again, he smiles at her softly and nods, taking her chin in his hand and moving her face up gently so their lips line up.

He kisses her softly. His hands-on her arms and hers at the nape of his neck. They’re so close he can’t tell when he ends and she starts. They’re both pushing and pulling, grabbing at each other in desperation, scared that they’ll slip out of each other’s hands and disappear He pulls back, his forehead pressed to hers, breath heavy.

“I love you too.” He whispers breathlessly before pulling her back to him.

The world disappears around them once more as they collide with such force that their breath is knocked out of them. Her hands grip the back of his shirt as his hands slip under the fabric of hers, feeling the smooth skin under it, pulling her closer to feel the heat radiating from her body.

Her hands come up and grab the sides of his face trying to will herself to pull away. One of her palms is pressed on the skin of her back, pulling her impossibly closer to him.

She’s finally able to pull away, she leaves small kisses at his neck as he pecks her shoulder.

“We’re giving everyone too much of a show.” She sighs heavily. Her hands wrapping completely around him.

“I can’t be without you anymore, y/n. Tell me you can’t be without me either. “ He wraps his arms around her, never wanting to let go again.

She nods her head into his neck, still kissing his warm skin.

She pulls away to look at him, both of them still wrapped around one another.

“I want to love you until the day I die. You are my dream and my path and everything in between too, Shawn.” Her words bring tears to his eyes. Everything he had said to her in the past had resonated with her and she was finally ready to admit that she felt the same.

They had a lot to work through but as long as they worked through it together, he was going to be okay.

And in his arms, y/n knew that this is where she belonged and that loving him and being with him were the best decisions she had ever made.

first

#Decisions final part #part four #okay crisis averted #here it is

326 notes · View notes

jksangelic · 5 years

Text

peaches & piercings (m)

↳ rating: M

↳ genre: punk!jimin, e2l, college au, very explicit smut, one-shot, jimin is a whole asshole

↳ pairing: cheerleader!reader x punk!jimin

↳ warnings: explicit sexual content, unprotected sex, sub/dom themes, casual sex, be t r ay a l, alcohol (and weed? idk) consumption, oral sex (male receiving), squirting, thigh-fucking, kind of exhibitionism?, jimin is pierced (that’s all i’ll say), just expect the worst from me tbh

↳ summary: jimin, dipped in hair-dye and pierced in so many places that you just couldn’t keep track, doesn’t think you’re his “type”. you call bullshit.

↳ note: i reallyreallyreally hated this fic. loved the idea, hated how i wrote it. i’ve had this bad boy sitting in my archives for months and months and months and couldn’t gather the courage to post it until NOW! partially because this is an apology fic for my inactivity and more so because i just think i’ve read it too many times that at this point, i’m just being nit-picky and need to move on.

a special thanks to the lovely @14statelier whomst unwillingly received dong pics for the sake of this fic. i’m so glad i found someone as sweet as you to beta for me + become an even better galpal! love u always xx

also thanks to my gal @jungshookz, i’m pretty sure (78% positive) i sent her my idea via snapchat and was probably inspired by her in some way, per usual.

OKAY i’m done you can read now hehehe

↳ words: 11.6k

↳ parts: one | two (complete)

“Jungkook, if you’re not going to throw it then get your grabby hands off my waist,” you warn, eyeing him as he stands behind you and delays in one-manning you into an extension or ogling your ass in your skirt.

“You’re just so wobbly today, I’m waiting for you to chill out a bit,” he lies with a smirk. You smack his hand but exhale deeply as you firmly grasp his wrists and count.

“1, 2!” With mutual timing, Jungkook dips down with you before heaving your body above, squatting to catch your heels mid-air, and pumping back up into an extended position. He’s right, you wobble a bit, calling out, “Bail!” and feeling his hands disappear beneath to re-catch your thighs and bring you down safely on your toes. You curse silently under your breath but pat Jungkook’s shoulder as a symbolic “thank you”.

“It’s too fucking early for this, I’m tired,” you say, only making excuses for yourself.

“Well, liven up. The doors are going to open soon and no freshmen want to join a failure of a cheer team.”

“Hey, stop bickering,” the captain, Suzy, orders, “Y/N, you’re fine to just handle the flyers, I’ll stunt with Jungkook.” You squish her into an exhausted hug.

“This is why you’re captain,” you coo.

With that, some of the staff open the gym doors, welcoming an intimidatingly large group of people in with smiles. You fake one yourself, ready to get this over with as soon as possible so you can go back to your dorm and sleep. Within ten minutes, you had a group of girls and a handful of brawny guys already watching Suzy and Jungkook’s exhibition, a mixture of oohs and ahs being rewarded. You handed each of them a thin, poorly-made flyer with pixelated clipart of a girl doing a toe-touch before they scrambled.

After a while, most of the initial commotion dies down and you people-watch each clueless face, thinking how adorable they are, so young and so lost, as if it weren’t you only a few months ago. You’re only a sophomore, but in your head that gives you enough authority to judge the freshmen.

You snap out of your daze upon boots clicking in the distance, soon revealing a man seemingly darting through the crowds to exit across the other side. You would’ve ignored him if it wasn’t for his peachy-tinted hair, long and slicked back atop and close-shaven near his neck, his thin but fit stature dressed in all-black, and the glint of metal, that you soon realized was a septum piercing, in his nose. He has a dark sleeve consuming his right arm and you wonder what eighteen or nineteen year old has a fully-developed sleeve.

Although his eyes were covered with chunky black sunglasses (in the gym, at that), the rest of his appearance sent your pierced-and-tatted-hot-boy alarm berserk. Suddenly awake, you wait for him to head closer to your booth before hopping next to him.

“Hi there, freshie. Care to take a tryout flyer for this year’s cheer team?” you ask with a pitch that’s much higher than your own, kindly handing him one of the shitty-looking papers. He mutters something under his breath that you don’t catch but speaks before you can ask him to clarify.

“Not a freshman. Do I look like someone who cheers? I’m just looking for the counseling center to turn in my transfer papers.

“Also, can you, like, give me some personal space?” he continues in a mock valley-girl tone.

You jump back, completely caught off guard with his sudden hostility and attempting to regain your composure by clearing your throat. Someone must’ve shoved a stick up his ass this morning.

“Oh, uh, sorry. Once you leave the gym, you head right, pass two sets of restrooms, head left, and it’s behind the big statue where the foyer is.” Your voice sounds much better.

His eyebrows rocket upwards over his glasses, completely frazzled by the number of directions you gave him, “Shit, okay. That’s a lot.”

“Here, I’ll just walk you,” you say, not giving him any time for him to probably decline. You don’t even question if he’s following you or not, the obvious clunkclunkclunk of his boots giving it away.

Unsurprisingly, the man doesn’t try to talk to you on the way to the counseling center. At most, he walks side-by-side, at least three meters between you for good measure. And even though it’s pretty clear he doesn’t want to talk, you ring him out a little more anyway.

“So, you’re not a freshman. Underclassman or upperclassman? And you’re a transfer? From where?”

Pass two sets of restrooms and head left.

“Senior. From Busan.” He doesn’t even show a hint of feeling. Emotion. Does this guy even breathe?

Straight until the statue in the foyer.

“Great. Well, it was nice to meet you, senior from Busan. I’m Y/N. If you ever need help or anything, feel free to ask me,” you deadpan, swiveling on your feet to salute him.

He leans on one hip, taking a hand with an incredible amount of rings on it and pushing his sunglasses over his hair like a headband. You certainly weren’t expecting a reveal of the kindest puppy dog eyes you’ve ever seen in your entire life. He almost looks permanently sleepy—eyes drooping flat on the lid. Your trance distracted you from his brief once-over, unpredictably impressed by your looks, if he had to admit it.

“It’s Jimin. Jimin, senior from Busan. See you around, cheerleader,” he says with a sly tilt of his lips before swinging the door open and slithering into the office. Past all the glitter and bright colors that poured out of that hideous uniform of yours, Jimin found you really cute.

Jimin waits patiently for the front desk to call him up, lounging in one of the hard, black plastic chairs that never failed to give his ass cramps. Though he didn’t seem like it to new faces around the campus, he was ecstatic to be starting college again in a whole new atmosphere. He even got to room with another male originally from Korea, Min Yoongi, in a small condo not too far a walk from the area.

He could even prospect cuties like you during his year, undoubtedly positive he could busy himself judging by the attention he’s attracted so far. All it would take is a hungry stare, a lick of his lips, an all-knowing smirk. It was easier here than it was back home, if not child’s play. He could have you in three hours flat. But then he thinks of you choosing the obnoxious cliché of college cheerleader and cringes at the idea of associating himself with such… American-ness. He could at least go for some sort of indifferent, grunge hipster that might actually have some thought to her. Yeah, more his style.

The woman at the front finally calls for him, so he arranges his papers and shoos away any daydream of hooking up with the girl in a tight skirt and ankle socks.

Taking the long route back to the gym, your imagination sputters through all the possible reasons why you should hate that guy, bad-guy radar ringing and shrieking and threatening to punch you square in the eye if you even think about it. Eventually, it comes to the conclusion that he was just new, he was probably having a rough moving-in, and you shouldn’t judge a transfer by their hair. Book by its binding? You don’t really remember how the saying goes in this situation.

“Hey, good job on snaking yourself out of flyer duty. What, did you bang Asian Hot Topic on your way?” Jungkook snickers.

“And did Cait break up with you because you can’t dom for shit? Hand me my jacket.”

He guffaws, practically throwing the clothing at your face, “We didn’t break up, asswipe. How am I supposed to act when she suddenly calls me ‘daddy’ without previous warning? I’m not ready to be a father.”

“Kook, you’re dumb as shit. Maybe I should bang Asian Hot Topic and give you pointers of how a real dom works their magic.”

Jungkook crosses his arms in denial, “Pfft, you don’t even know him. He could be a receiver for all you know.”

One, two, three seconds. You both chortle at the impracticality.

You take one final look in the body mirror, adjusting the slinky grey dress and hanging an oversized burnt-orange corduroy jacket over your shoulders for that final touch of unnecessary, but fashionably-adept, garnish to your outfit cupcake. Not having enough time to do your hair, you sweep it over to one side and leave it as is.

“You look fine and you’re ten minutes late so get out already,” your roommate, Sara, whines. She practically pushes you out, slamming and locking the door for emphasis.

Waving off your discombobulated roommate, you start your trek to the humanities building (which is so far away) with a skip in your step. A new school year meant new people, new classes, more lunchtimes with subpar food and occasional parties that could potentially lead to you getting arrested. Who knows!

A new school year, however, didn’t mean that you would know your way to your new class apparently. Bummer.

It’s only by your fourth circle and a glance at your phone that you panic, fifteen minutes somehow passing in the midst of your scrambling. Pace quickening, you pull out your paper with sloppily written notes of what class room number was at which time, simultaneously half-jogging past classrooms and—

“Oof!”

You land straight on your ass.

“Ow, watch where you’re going stu—oh, it’s you.”

You look up groggily, pain stinging through your legs from the brunt of your fall and lazily making eye contact with a pair of puppy dog eyes. Jimin stands above you, rubbing his chin where, you suppose, your forehead made rough contact with and indiscreetly staring at your bright blue panties where your dress failed to cover.

Hopping up and dusting yourself off, you pick up your fallen bag and paper before glaring at him, “Sorry, I got lost and wasn’t paying attention.”

He scoffs, “Aren’t you the cheerleader? You’re supposed to be, like, the girl scout of the school, right? You shouldn’t be lost.”

You roll your eyes, “Yeah, well. I am,” you mutter to yourself, “I don’t even think there’s a 207 in this building…”

“Oh, 207? Intro to psych, right? That’s where I’m going too,” he admits, eyes blown wide. Welp, certainly not the highlight of your morning.

“Great. By the looks of the current time, we’re both lost and,” you wave around the empty corridor, “there’s no one who’s going to help us.”

“I’m not lost. I just woke up late,” he answers nonchalantly, a warm glow to his face like he couldn’t give two damns about his class.

“W-What? Then let’s go! Where is it?”

Jimin twirls and walks a different direction, mumbling, “I’m not your escort, rich girl.”

You prattle at his comment but follow him anyway. When you find the correct lecture hall, you groan at the fact that you already passed it several times. He opens the door quietly, not even bothering to hold it for you as you scramble to catch it. A couple of the back rows look back at you two, annoyed by the minor inconvenience.

“Well. Welcome to my 10AM psychology class at,” the professor booms through the hall and peeks at his wristwatch, “10:36. Go ahead and take these two free seats.”

Jimin shrugs and walks towards the front of the room, a quiet and embarrassed you tiptoeing behind him. Being this late and having to sit next to this ass wasn’t how you wanted your first day to go at all.

For the remainder of the 24 minutes until the first break, you skim over the contents that you missed in the syllabus and want to ram your head into the closest wall. Participation and attendance by themselves are 30% of your grade, homework and assignments (thank god) being a measly 20%, and the final plus tests and quizzes a hunking remainder of 50%. What even was this system?

During your ten minute break, you silently scroll through your phone notifications, setting it down irritatingly when the hall refused to grant you enough service to respond to any of them.

“Don’t have LTE, princess? Might as well watch paint dry without your phone to entertain you,” Jimin snickers beside you. You scowl menacingly at him and he giggles more.

“I don’t know what your problem is, but back off, Jimin. Sorry I don’t, like, play the electric guitar in my free time or whatever.”

He doesn’t respond immediately, still smiling and blowing bubbles with his gum, popping them quite obnoxiously, and quite intentionally.

“What, do you think I play the electric guitar? Are you stereotyping me as some sort of garage band drop-out punk?” he jesters.

“And do you take me for some sort of pink fuzzy consumerist? You don’t know me. Buzz off.”

Jimin had definitely tucked you into his mental folder of “tough gals”; his aloof tactic of flirting not seeming to penetrate that pretty skull of yours. He could just take the path of least resistance and approach you normally, but where was the fun in that? You were too interesting a specimen to just use-and-discard.

Jimin suddenly thinks you look attractive with furrowed brows and pouted lips. It was most definitely working for you, so he lets it slide for now. When class ends, you all but bolt before Jimin can even look your way, sure he’d find another surface flaw to pick at.

You suddenly think of what all of the adults in your life have said during your upbringing: people that went out of their way to bully you were either jealous or had an embarrassingly crushing “thing” for you. Jimin, on the other hand, was just annoying.

Of course, to your dismay, class isn’t the only time you ever saw him. You weren’t totally stupid. The campus didn’t stretch for miles and you were bound to see him sometime and have to deal with the efforts of avoiding the man at all costs but fuck were you praying to whoever controls your Sim above that they would grant you some mercy.

“Just tell him to fuck off if he’s so far up your ass,” Jungkook argues, crushing his juice box in one gulp and biting his massive cafeteria burrito.

“You don’t get it, Kook. I have. So many times, in so many different instances. Did I tell you about the time I thought he was helping me get a textbook from a tall shelf but he ended up taking that last one for himself?” You angrily rip a bite from your limp sandwich. You really did hate Turkey Thursdays.

“Eh, first come, first serve. Maybe he didn’t know you were trying to grab that one.”

“My ass, Jungkook. He claimed that if I really wanted it, I would ‘do something in fair exchange’ for it. I’m not looking to going into prostitution anytime soon.”

“Respect sex workers,” Jungkook criticizes.

“Oh, no, totally. Sex work just isn’t my forte.” Kook shrugs.

“Okay,” you continue, “how about the time I went to IKEA to buy that ceiling lamp and was obviously struggling to one-trip everything from my car? The dumbfuck passed by and asked if I needed help, so I was like, ‘Yeah! Sure, it would definitely make up for the time you asked for sex in lieu of my psych book,’ but instead of helping me carry anything he took my coffee, drank some, and left.” Jungkook starts a rebuttal but you cut him off short, “Then he showed up to my work the other day, god knows how he even saw me in there, and started taking a video of me when I wasn’t paying attention!”

“What the hell,” your friend sports a face of disgust, “like, he’s stalking you?”

You scratch the back of your neck, “Well, not exactly? I think he was just maybe—see, A$AP Rocky may or may have not been playing on the speakers, and I didn’t know anyone was in the shop! So. I don’t know. I started—”

“Started rapping with a rolled up poster as your microphone,” he deadpans. Finishing your horrid sandwich, you crumple the saran wrap and chuck it at his eye, satisfied when we wails exaggeratingly.

“Maybe that’s just his way of flirting with you, he’ll get bored eventually.”

“I think he just hates my guts and thinks of me as an equal to the gum under his thick, goth boots,” you mumble.

“Does it matter? So what if Danny Phantom doesn’t like you?”

“He’s causing a problem though. Besides, everyone cares if someone doesn’t like them. It’s bullshit if they tell you otherwise; bullshit or a lack of sympathy.”

“So what are you going to do about it? Because I’m totally your friend and all but I don’t necessarily want to hear about your boy problems all the time.” You harrumph at his negligence and slump back into your seat.

There really wasn’t anything you could do about it; it wasn’t bad enough to the point of distressing tyranny. You simply couldn’t befriend the guy, it was obvious he didn’t want that. You would just have to pray to all things good that he would eventually lose interest, stop harassing you out of kindness, or have a change of heart and treat you like the saint you were.

If only it were that easy.

Sylly-week kicked ass, to say the least. Even two days prior the hectic week from hell, your body aches from partying while your wallet cries from all the textbooks and supplies you paid for.

Sara slept beside you, forehead stuck to the desk with her laptop stuck on some sort of half-assed document and you couldn’t fathom a better picture to represent college.

Although it was already around 11, you hop out of bed and throw on your windbreaker from cheer and some spandex, shuffling into a pair of your sneakers and bolting out of your room with your bag. The amount of sodium and sugar you consumed from Cup-O-Noodles and off-brand cookie dough bites made you feel disgusting, and you know running a quick mile at the gym would get your blood pumping enough to make you: 1) feel better about yourself and 2) put your ass to sleep.

The walk is short, the air still a little heavy with heat but cool enough for you to be comfortable in a long-sleeve. Some tired students exit the library, really the only other people you see at this hour. You would’ve thought it creepy if the campus wasn’t so well-lit and played background music through the announcement speakers. If you died or got kidnapped, at least it was to some groovy jazz.

You swipe your card across the sensor beside the athletic building door, waiting for that subtle beep before the gears clank and allow you to heave the door open. Immediately, the smell of sweat poorly masked with air freshener fill your nostrils and your adrenaline builds. You’re no body builder, but a run certainly sounded nice right about now.

You practically skip through the halls, rounding a corner to enter the weight room before you stop in your tracks to see someone in the room across. You squint suspiciously, peachy hair striking a very strong familiarity to…

“Jimin?” you whisper to yourself. You shouldn’t be surprised that he’s at the gym, but you are because he isn’t. He’s in the dance studio. Before you bolt, your eyes glue to his sensual movements, legs gliding across the floor and body free-flowing alongside the bass-filled music. No previous bias could deny that he looks like an angel in his room, dancing smooth as meringue and practically skating across the floor despite those clunky black boots of his; and powerful, hitting every note and beat with intention and vigor. You’ve never seen anyone dance like this.

After a few seconds, you render that you’re spying on him and continue walking, nervously scuffing your sneakers down the linoleum and immediately, and unfortunately, catching his attention.

He first sees you in the mirror. Ignores you. Then realizes it’s you and turns into the most ungraceful bag-of-bones as he scurries to pause the music and chases you down the hall.

“Hey!” he yells, grabbing your elbow.

“Don’t touch me,” you strike back, jerking your elbow out of his grasp and staring him down.

He looks apologetic, genuinely worried for a second before he breathes deep and tries again, “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to grab you like that. Um, why are you here?”

“Um, because I can be? I was going to go to the gym, dickwad.”

It takes all of his patience not to insult you, “Okay. You’re right. Were you… were you watching me?”

You give him a sickeningly-sweet smile, “Don’t flatter yourself. I was just passing by.”

He nods solemnly, straightening his tank as if it wasn’t already wrinkled and damp with sweat, “Okay. Okay, cool.” He starts to turn before he keeps going in a 360.

“Can you keep this between me and you? That I was here? That I was here and I was—”

“Dancing?” you ask quizzically, “Why does it matter?”

His eyebrows stitch together in frustration, “Y/N, do I look like I’m a dancer?” He gestures to his piercings and his sleeve, waving his hands about in so many different places that your lewd curiosity wonders what he looks like naked—for the sake of knowing how many piercings and tattoos he has though, obviously.

“I think you look like a dancer. Just not a contemporary dancer. Did you take ballet?” you half-tease, crossing your arms and beaming slyly at him.

Jimin huffs, impatient, “Will you just keep it locked somewhere in that airhead of yours?”

“What’s in it for me, Jiminie,” you pout, “what do I get as reward for keeping your secret?”

He falters a moment, licking his plump lips and walking dangerously close, “You want a reward? I don’t take you as that kind of girl, Y/N.”

He must be delirious, eyeing him so and shoving him away, “Ew, no. I just meant, like, be nice to me from now on. And help me with psychology. That class is nothing but a memory test.”

He blinks dumbly from your rejection; who ever rejected him? He waves it off.

“Okay. I can be compliant. I won’t treat you like the rich bitch you are, and I tutor you on Tuesdays and Thursdays. Deal?”

“I’m not a rich bitch. I have student loans like the rest of the student population, thank you very much. Deal.”

You smile at each other devilishly, ready to part ways before bursting out with an instant, “Wait!”

Jimin looks over his shoulder curiously. Damn, you could really see how toned his shoulders were in that shirt.

“There’re dance majors here, is that what you transferred for?”

He turns all the way, leaning sideways against the wall and sighing, “Honestly, yes. But my family thinks I’m transferring to finish my business degree and that I would have better opportunities here. I really did it because there’s some great studios in the area but—” he catches himself rambling, “I don’t know how they would feel about my grand decision.”

You shrug, “You’re a great dancer, Jimin. Honestly, you could open your own studio here if you wanted to. You do have great opportunities.”

His sleepy eyes stare you down, a half-smile drawing itself out before he can take it back. “Give me your phone,” he orders.

You don’t know why but you do.

He dials into it with his overly-accessorized fingers, giving you a moment to get a closer look at his septum and the abundance of ear-piercings he sports before he hands it back. You’re pretty sure one of them is Gucci and you bite back a chuckle. Rich bitch.

“That’s my number. Text me when you’re free on study days.”

And with that, he re-enters his room and resumes the music.

The first time Park Jimin meets with you at a Starbucks on a Tuesday, like he instructed, you thought you somehow managed to get yourself stuck in the Twilight Zone.

“Hey, it’s Y/N. My last class ends at 3 on both days and there’s already a quiz this Friday. Help.”

You sent the text without emojis. He didn’t deserve any.

You had barely got to Instagram before he texted you back. With multiple messages.

“u text like a gramma”

“but ok”

“starbucks at 330? i’ll buy”

You giggled to yourself at his joke, sending a single “(:” and putting your phone to sleep.

To your disbelief, he really did buy you a cheese danish and a tall, iced, caramel macchiato. You sip it gingerly while he pulls his things out of his bag: a couple mechanical pencils (the industrial, expensive ones), a 1-inch binder organized by subject with dividers, and notecards. You grab them and hold them up like it’s evidence from a leading murder case.

“Notecards? You are way too organized and functional.”

He snags your pastry before you can grab it and takes a huge bite, “Yeah, but ih’s gonna het you a bedder ghrade.”

Whining, you get it back after his second bite, somehow only half remaining.

“Okay. Let’s get started. It should only be a vocab check because that’s really all he’s asked us to study so far. We’ll start with my wonderful notecards,” he waves them in the air for effect, “and see which ones you do and don’t know.”

You nod, waiting for the chaos to begin. Who were you to tell him that you haven’t actually studied any of the vocab yet? He holds the first one up. Abductive reasoning.

“Uhh… is that like, something detectives use on kidnapping cases?”

“Wh-What? No. Well—are you thinking of ‘abductions’? Abductive reasoning is being able to use the two states of induction and deduction alongside your intuition to reach a conclusion,” he pauses and tilts his head a little, “ I guess the best analogy is giving out a verdict on a criminal case. Without being 100% sure, they use the evidence to tie together as many different points as they can to come to a conclusion. So, I mean, you got it wrong, but you can easily remember the definition with that.”

You’ll take what you get (majority of his reasoning went through one ear and out the other, anyway), wiggling your eyebrows in justified approval. Jimin laughs at you, eyes squinting to slits and shaking his head. He takes notice that you aren’t wearing much makeup today, your cheeks and the bridge of your nose a tad red with irritation and a bit dry where the sun burnt and eyes daintier without so much eyeliner on them. You threw on a tank and some workout shorts and look like the epitome of… comfortable, in your head. Jimin thinks you look effortless.

“Park?” you wave your hand in front of him.

He catches himself staring and jumps out of his seat, chair screeching across the tile.

“Sorry,” he coughs, “I’m going to take a whiz.” Stupid. He practically trips over himself to get to the restroom.

You watch him hurry to the back. He probably had much better things to do than help you study in the middle of the afternoon. A couple of younger girls watch him as he passes, giggling like a pack of fangirls and combing their hair out of their faces. If they only knew.

Did he even have a girlfriend? Most likely not, right? He only just transferred here and despite his well-endowed looks, he was still intimidating. Like a giant “don’t touch, I bite” sign constantly hung around his neck.

He comes back shortly, and before you can deduct that you would rather save the embarrassment than to quench your curiosity, you ask, “Are you dating anyone?”

“Because you get a lot of followers,” you reason, shamelessly pointing out the girls who ogle his tattooed biceps. They giggle again when he looks their way. God, so many giggles.

He rubs the back of his neck nervously and that intrigues you, “No, I’m not dating anyone. I think if it weren’t for my… accessories? And the fact that I’m foreign, girls wouldn’t like me as much.” You find tiny comfort that he’s single but squish the thought away.

“How ‘bout you? Dating that guy on your team?” he retorts.

“Who, Jungkook?” you snort, “No. He has a girlfriend and he’s all brawn over brain. I’m not dating anyone, actually. I don’t like guys that are so competitive to win females strictly for the points, and there’s a lot of that here. S’gross; we’re not animals.”

“We kinda are,” he argues, but smiles understandingly.

“Okay, but not in the way where your possible significant other has to perform an instinctual mating dance?”

He juts up an eyebrow, “Really? Because I could easily arrange that.”

For the first time, you both laugh. At the same thing. Who knew that Jimin could dance of all things? And pay for your food? And actually be a nice guy who’s really smart? Thinking about it, today has gone so polar-opposite of what you expected that you contemplate if this is Jimin’s identical twin that just happens to have the same piercings and ink that bully-Jimin has.

Twilight Zone.

“Okay, let’s continue,” he says, resuming the queue of notecards.

“Define abulia.”

“Hello? Earth to Y/N?” Jimin waved a hand in your face.

“Hm? Sorry, say it again.”

Jimin packed up his supplies, then grabs yours and tucks them into your bag, “I said, ‘Are we going to your place right now?’ You said you picked up Black Panther on DVD so I want to watch it.”

“Oh, yeah, sure. Cats and shit.”

You both stand up and stretch, the rest of the students in the lecture hall slowly filing out. Midterms were already approaching, which meant that you and Jimin had known each other for quite some time now. His tutoring was ditched weeks ago after you were finally comfortable with the material and able to comprehend what the professor was saying without Jimin to interpret. At first, meeting up stopped completely. You two would talk occasionally during class break and that’s all, and after a while, you just figured your deal was completed and Jimin finished his case and you both separated onto your different ways.

But then Jimin had asked if you wanted coffee at the same Starbucks you had first studied at, but for no specific reason. Just to hang out. So, you did.

Hanging out once or twice for coffee turned into twice getting lunch turned into four or five times lazing about your dorm, and now, you were just completely, wholesomely, friends. It was hard not to be on edge at the contrast of current Jimin to hell-on-earth Jimin, but you took what you could get.

“Is something on your mind? You’ve been spacing out for a long time,” he prods, taking your bag himself and throwing it over the same shoulder his own bag was on. The

walk to your dorm building was short but you could feel your feet dragging from sudden exhaustion.

“I think I’m just tired? I’m fine. Ready to Black Panther it up and all that jazz,” you chuckle. He takes the hint and resorts to quietly humming to your room rather than talking. That’s one thing you liked about him, he always knew when your mind just needed simple white noise.

Unlocking the door and jostling it out of its stickiness, you make a running jump to faceplant onto your bed. The mattress dips next to you when Jimin sits.

“I know you like cheer and all, but I think you need to take a break,” he says.

“Easier said than done. And I have mandatory captain conditioning in 3 hours,” you groan, propping your head on the palm of your hand to watch Jimin as he eats a stale bag of chips that he found on your nightstand. His face contorts in repulsion and throws the bag away.

“Okay, well, you’re not going. Tell them you’re sick. Let’s watch some DC movies and eat popcorn and have, like, a girl sleepover but I’m not a girl and I don’t want to spend the night,” he says, counting each point on his fingers.

“First of all, you lunatic, it’s Marvel not DC. Second, I don’t have popcorn. I can’t just skip conditioning because if I gain one pound Jungkook will sense it with his nose or something and attack me.”

“What,” he says in disbelief, grabbing your waist with one hand and squeezing a little, “you’re fine. You’re not going today and that’s final.” It’s not very often he touches you and as much as you try not to show it, you feel your face heat and mouth gape open and closed, ready to combust. You don’t particularly know why; guys touch you all the time (not in that way, thank you very much) but when it was Jimin, it was like you had been raised feral and failed to receive any means of human interaction.

He notices, taking his hand away as quick as he placed it and looking at the floor. Despite your lack of proper reaction, you would be lying if you said you didn’t feel a little twinge of disappointment. God, you’re so confusing to yourself.

“How about you? Your vampire ass won’t dance in sunlight so you must be tired too. How long do you normally dance for when you’re in the studio?”

“Well,” he lays flat on his back and stares at your popcorn ceiling (your dorm building was extremely outdated), “I try to workout at the actual gym in the morning before I get ready for class, and then I dance from 11 to whenever I feel is enough during the weeknights. That is, if no one’s there.”

“Why do you even follow this whole path of disliking mainstream trends and ‘rebelling against the world’? Isn’t that tiring? Aside from dance, do you, like, make your own skateboards and go to secret underground bars or something?” you tease. He rolls his head towards you in annoyance and mouths a “ha ha”.

“No, I just. I don’t know. I don’t like people telling me what to do or where to go or how to look,” he showcases his tatted arm. “This is all mine. I don’t want to be another puppet controlled my whole life to consume and work off a never-ending debt just so I can only live comfortably when I’m old but too old to actually live.”

“Wow, bro. That’s deep,” you pretend to smoke a pretzel stick. He continues anyway.

“Recently I made some friends that are in one of my labs. They’re from Korea too. If I’m not studying or working or hanging out with you, I’m probably with them. Partying or something,” he says, stealing away your “cigarette” and crunching on it loudly.

“Woah, you work? How do you find the time to do that?”

“Kinda. Nothing official, I just tutor people sometimes. Charge them by the hour and make some decent pocket change for food or whatever.”

You contemplate. How come he’s never charged you for your tutoring before? You ask him, studying his side profile and admiring his jawline when he talks. Flexing then easing; taut then relaxed.

“Because we had a deal. We agreed that I would help you in psych as long as you kept my secret, in which you did, so I figured that was good enough. Besides, you’re too cute to charge. I look like a bad boy but I’m not evil.” You giggle, resembling a middle-school fangirl and exaggerating a flattered stature.

Jimin laughs again, light and refreshing staccato notes that you could honestly listen to all day. It was therapeutic in its own crackhead way.

You’ve been unintentionally staring at him more and more often, Jimin finally taking notice within the last few minutes. He knew how to read a girl; how revealing they make themselves to impress him or how their eyes dim in any sort of suggestion that his hands should somehow find place on their body. But with you, he has no idea what that stare means. For the most part, you carry yourself so independently to the point of being standoffish and Jimin just can’t figure you out. He sought the day you would give in and beg for a night with him just like most of the other girls in his classes did, and when you didn’t, he wanted to know why. Not out of inflated ego or need to get into your pants—okay maybe because of that initially—but even more so that he just needed to dissect you. Know how to get you going, what kind of person you really are, which was completely different from what he originally imagined.

You were talking amidst his thoughts, not paying attention to the strings of sentences that fell out of your lips and before he knew it, he held himself directly above you, hands on each side of your head and staring right down into your disordered doe eyes.

“What makes you so different?” he asks aloud, more to himself than you. Puzzled and not under the impression that it was a rhetorical question, you shake your head.

“I don’t u-understand. What are you doing, Ji—”

He tucks a loose strand of yours out of your face, causing you to hiccup. “I feel like when I think I know you, I’m actually far from it.”

You don’t particularly know what you’re supposed to say to that.

“You didn’t ever need to get to know me. You just needed to make sure I kept your secret,” you play along. Knowing it wasn’t really the whole case, your own statement stings a little. If it weren’t to save his own ass, would he even be here right now?

Like he read your mind, he answers, “Why would I be here? I haven’t needed to help you in weeks. I’m with you all the time because I want to be. Because I—”

“Because you…?” you trail on, heart beating so hard you swear he can hear it. You wanted him to say it, maybe that’s what was keeping you from confirming your feelings. You needed validation; that this wasn’t just you or that this was some one-sided longing because you doubted someone like him could ever like someone like you.

“Can I kiss you?” he asks instead, so hesitant and delicate and worrisome all in one question and you ponder if this is the same boy you first met at orientation.

“Please.”

He dips down slowly, eyes half-closed in anticipation of what your face looks like so close, pausing an inch away when you shut your own. You feel his warmth near your mouth, waiting for that first touch, any contact, until it seems like it’s been far too long. When you peek, you see nothing but his perfect… cheekbone? He stares, jaw stuck open and eyes fluttering, at the intruder in the door before swinging himself off the bed and coughing awkwardly.

“Oh, Sara. I didn’t know you were coming home so early today,” you squeak out. You sit up yourself, brushing off nonexistent dust from the bed and watching Jimin gather his things in a rush and squeezing past a concerned Sara in the doorway. He doesn’t even turn back, ears stinging red and peeping a quick, havetogotextyoulater. Great, the asshole left you to face your roommate alone.

“Was that Jimin? Park Jimin? The fucking transfer student?”

“Oh my god, Sara, what’re you freaking out about?”

Dropping her stuff in the middle of the room, she shrieks annoyingly and grabs your shoulders, “Are you seriously fucking with the Park Jimin? Y/N. Nuh-uh. No way. Do you know what you’re getting yourself into?”

“Chill out! We’re just friends. He tutors me sometimes.” Not quite a lie.

She eyes you and deadpans, “Yeah, I didn’t know tutoring also included a one-on-one session of how to have sexual intercourse.”

“You’re so dramatic,” you remove her hands, which were digging crescents into your skin, and pretend to arrange your bed, “we haven’t even kissed. You just walked in at an inconvenient time.”

Sara sighs, rubbing her temples and sitting on your bed, “Look, babe. Just be careful. I’ve been to parties with him and have heard some awful things. Shit you expect from a movie where the girl gets fucked over because the guy doesn’t know how to keep his dick in his pants. I just want the best for you, okay? He’s not as sweet as you might think he is.”

He isn’t sweet at all, you said internally. But still, your heart clenches at her words. Sure, he acts like a dick, and you shouldn’t be surprised if he really does get around as much as Sara suspects; but there was just some sort of denial that lingered. If he really was such a player, why would he have stuck around with you for as long as he has, as platonic as it has been until now?

“I… I didn’t know that. I’ll be careful,” you assure her.

All it took was a squinty-eyed smile and a tiny caress to the small of your back on the way into the lecture hall for you to completely melt into his hands. You were simply putty, magically molding into some gross, odd-smelling ball of love just because of the almost-incident yesterday. You can practically feel the radiating disappointment from Sara if she knew how easily you gave yourself up for him.

His face reoccurs in your daydreams for days, all the way up until the weekend comes up from behind and smacks you on the ass.

“Focus,” Jungkook taps you through you skirt again. Oh, or maybe it was Jungkook.

The stadium speakers blared with announcements and you’re brought back to the world of clashing helmets, captain’s orders and Jungkook’s strong hands residing on your waist for partner stunts.

You didn’t need to be reminded, you were much more stable than you were weeks ago. He throws you in the air during the signaling note of the band and catches your right foot with ease above him, keeping you stable as you pull a heel stretch and present a pretty smile. The crowd roars along, inspiring the team and singing along with the cheers.

By the end of the game, you’re exhausted, tearing down paper signs from the concrete walls and shuffling your poms into your bag in a hurry.

“Hey, are you going to the feed after? Everyone’s going, I could give you a ride,” Jungkook offers, but you shake your head.

“I’m pretty beat. I’ll go next time.” He shrugs, finding more interest in catching up to someone who is interested than trying to convince you otherwise. By the time your clean-up is done, most of the fans are gone, the stadium a comparable difference of quiet than how it was only twenty minutes ago.

“You’re sure taking forever,” a sudden voice pipes up. Outside the gate stands Jimin, all-black tank and jeans, per usual. “You looked great out there.”

You smile, suddenly awake and jogging towards him, “What’re you doing here? I thought you didn’t like football.” During all your rushing do you realize that you relax around Park, time always seeming to slow down in his presence and you dissolve into his effect.

“I don’t. Such an American moneymaker. They’re all cons.” He takes your bag like he always does, leaning against the gate and looking excited, “Mind if we stop by my place? I have something to show you. It’s not far, probably only a 5 minute walk from here.”

You nod before he even mentions how long it takes to get there, heart palpitating at the thought that he’s inviting you over. You’re sure you smelled from cheer and you probably looked like the opposing team warmed up suicide runs over your sweaty body, but you nod.

“Were you here the whole time? Or just towards the end?” you ask, slightly insecure towards the fact that he could’ve been watching you cheer.

“Was here since halftime. Got Yoongs to watch with me at the gate where I was before for the most part. He left halfway through fourth quarter though, said he got tired from seeing others exert themselves so much,” he chuckles at the thought, eyes squinting and crooked tooth visible from the side. Your heart swooned, you were even starting to notice the little things. How he acted. His habits. What he did and didn’t like.

You were in fucking deep.

“I did get to see you cheer though,” he answers your unspoken inquiry, “you looked pretty, Y/N. It’s like watching a whole ‘nother person compared to how you act outside of uniform.” You’re still stuck on the word “pretty” and nod along like you’re listening.

“You should see how people look at you,” he draws on, “like they’re entranced. Even when you were just relaxing on the sideline, not doing anything, you stand out.”

“Oh my god, Jimin, where is this even coming from? One more compliment and the world might explode from the paradox you’re creating.”

He shoves your shoulder lightly, laughing at your tomato-red face, “What do you mean? I can’t compliment you?”

“No that’s not—I just mean. You know. You used to hate me and now you shower me with praise like I’m the best person in the world. It’s just crazy how much our relationship has changed. And… And yesterday—”

“Yo, can’t believe you really stayed for the rest of the game,” a raspy voice outbursts. You just realize that Jimin stopped you in front of a house, presumably his house, as a mint-haired ball sits on the porch. He inhales from his cigarette and exhales through his nose before throwing it underneath his boot.

“Hey, Yoongs. This is Y/N. Y/N, Min Yoongi, my roommate. Has a bad smoking habit and have only recently gotten him to smoke outside.” Jimin snickers, offering a hand to lift Yoongi off the step and welcome him into some bro-hug.

“You smoke too, bastard. Just did it ‘cause I knew you were bringing someone home tonight,” Yoongi retaliates, eyeing your figure. Shivers run down your spine at the comment.

Jimin coughs unexpectedly, then anxiously laughs as he pulls your arm behind him and into the house, “We’ll be in the living room. Go sleep or something.” Yoongi only clicks his tongue in response.

“Sorry,” he says once your inside, “he can be a little too personal sometimes. He’s really nice once you get to know him.” You shake your head, giving him a comforting smile that eases the tension in his shoulders.

He settles you on the couch, host-like politeness apparent when he asks if you want anything to drink, tells you where the bathroom is, and hands you the tv remote before disappearing to find his laptop. His home was cozy, minimalist furniture often in gray, black, and an occasional blue spread throughout the rooms. You weren’t sure if the boys were attempting to be modern or if college tuition only allowed them this sort of set-up, but nonetheless, it was way nicer than you expected.

“Back,” Jimin plops onto the couch right next to you, Apple laptop unlocked to a default background. He looks to you briefly before setting up some page on Google, “Have you signed up for your classes for next quarter yet?”

He looks different, your eyes scanning over his face to figure out just what it is, “Basically, just gotta confirm and pay and whatnot. Have you, Jimin?”

It’s his septum, you discover, that he’s taken out. He looks handsome either way. Propping the laptop suddenly on your lap, he beams, “Yeah, go ahead and take a look.”

You scroll through the page, humming to yourself, “Mhm… Mhm… Accounting, business 101, contemporary repertory… God, you’re going to hate sociology with Doyard, she’s a complete psycho!” You trail, giggling at his misfortune. Once you’re done, you meet his discontent face.

It takes a few takes from his face to the screen, back to his face, until oh shit!

“Wait does ‘contemporary repertory’ mean something important?” you squeal in rushed excitement. “Is that a dance thing? Are you taking a dance class here?” Before he can even explain, you shut the laptop and safely place it on the coffee table before tackling the man, withdrawing an oof from his lips.

“Easy, girl. Please don’t break me before I even get to show up on the first day.”

“Jimin, this is amazing. You’re finally doing something you want to do, during regular hours, at that!” You nuzzle into his warm chest, “I’m so happy for you, Jimin. I hope you have fun.” His heart clenches at that; how could you be so fucking caring about him? He knew you’d be surprised, but not genuinely happy for him. His hand glides over the skin between your midriff and skirt, an inkling of a gasp floating out of your throat.

“Sorry,” he whispers, moving his hand higher and locking eyes with yours. Time is always slow with him but now, it’s like it was screaming at you to take the opportunity. Unwinding one of your arms from around his neck, you smooth his hair up so you can see those prepossessing eyes.

“You can touch me,” you confirm just as softly. His features harden and you hope you didn’t read the situation wrong.

“I… I never got to kiss you that night.”

“Then you can kiss me now, if you’d like,” you say, pleading in your voice and it’s all he needs to hear before he burns his lips into yours. “I can’t tell you how much I’ve wanted this,” he pants between suckles to your bottom lip. He kisses like he dances: powerful and in perfect control with his body, molding it to yours and massaging the skin he just apologized for touching only seconds ago.

You cup his face and look down at him with sultry prowess, “I want you, Jimin. I’ve always thought about this, hoping you would just make a move, idiot.” You dive back into him, his moans prominent when you lick and nip at his lip. He lowers his grip to your ass, squeezing and pushing his hips into your own.

“Well, I’ve always thought about fucking you in this cursed uniform,” he growls, forcing a giggle out of you. Grinding down into him for effect, your mouth travels to his ear so you can state a small confirmation.

“I’m flexible, babe. I’m all yours.”

He hums his praise, latching his mouth onto your neck, laving and peppering blues into your skin before he carries you off the couch. You wrap your legs around him instinctively, “Where are you taking me?”

Heading into a hallway and taking a sharp left, he kicks his door open, “I don’t know about you, hot stuff, but Yoongs doesn’t need to see you getting dicked down in our living room,” he jests. When he lays you back onto the foot of his bed, you briefly scan his room and find it hard to believe that it’s relatively clean, the posters on his walls the only thing that seemed cluttered. This guy was your high school self’s wet dream. Scanning him promiscuously, you chuckle.

“I can be into it,” you drawl playfully.

Earning an unimpressed scoff, he fingers the hem of his shirt, “You’re mine,” he sheds it in a swift pull and throws it to the side cockily. Marveling at each detailed divot and curve of muscle, you can’t help but bite your lip in frustrated anticipation. “Unless, you don’t want me,” he finishes with a tilt of his head. He knew what he was doing, simulating innocence to draw you out of your transfixed stupor to hear those three words string from your mouth. You reach out to touch his abs, tracing over linework of ink and watching him shiver from your touch. Knowing exactly what he wants to hear, you gaze into oblique eyes and mouth the words, “I do want you”.

Goading him on, you lay back and extend your legs above you, shuffling your spandex tantalizingly slow over your skin. Jimin whistles at your show, staring at the white g-string you sported under your skirt and wandering his hands over the supple skin you expose.

“Jesus, you fucking tease. Leave the skirt.” Tittering at his request, you dig your heels into his back to propel him down towards you, his ringed hands keeping himself afloat and a winning smile winking down at you. Bless your heart you didn’t faint right then and there.

He kisses you like a man starved, lips burning hot with desire and aching to be bit—so you give him that. Sinking your teeth gently into the flesh, he punishes such action with a slap to the underneath of your thigh, then holding it close to the side of his abdomen and rolling over with you on top. Practically suffocating from lack of air, you dislodge yourself, quite reluctantly, from his mouth and soothe his complaints with brief kisses to his thick neck.

“Why didn’t we do this—ah, before?” he pants. Sucking a particularly tender spot of his jugular, he moans out and bucks into your hips. You continue your way down, leaving no inch of skin untouched until you reach where his skin ends and the nuisance of clothing began.

“You don’t make things very easy for me. Can I suck you off?”

“Fuck, don’t ask. Just do it. Turn around, though, I’ll finger you at the same time,” he offers, propping himself up on his elbows as you readjust yourself with your head towards his bulge and your ass facing him, knees keeping you up on one side of his torso. “Perfect,” he commends.

Unbuckling his ridiculously tight jeans, you hook your thumbs under the denim and whisper a quick, “Up,” to pull them off when his hips lift off the mattress. Your pride inflates at the sight of his bulge resting in the crook of his thigh, adorned by simple black boxers that hugged him in all the right spots. All but drooling at the member, you place a loving kiss where you know his head resides, mouthing at it gingerly and soaking the material with your saliva.

He ruts into your face as he watches such indecency, “You know, I should probably tell you something,” he says rather seriously, shuffling your skirt up above your ass and mischievously prodding at your sex with his thumb.

“Hmm,” you mumble, sliding his boxers down enough to suck at the pink tip that oozed of precum and spreading the liquid around with your tongue. The bitterness that came with it was all welcomed, slightly sweeter than others you’ve ever tasted and you appreciated it much more when a man this good-looking was laid out before you.

He groans, “Ever heard of a Jacob’s Ladder? Fuck, right there, underneath a bit…” You suck and nip at the skin of his frenulum, knowing he was bound to like small dosages of pain mixed with his pleasure—a guess all too correct when he cries out in ecstasy and gives your ass a light spank.

“A Jacob’s what?”

“Just—just look at it. If you don’t like it then I can just take them out,” he sighs, all too impatient to give you a rundown of whatever a Jacob’s hoo-ha entailed. You perk a brow at his vocabulary, halting your mouth and sliding his boxers the rest of the way down.

If you weren’t riled up before, you were hot, ready, and willing to beg on your knees to be stuffed with Jimin and his… accessories. You understand the term “ladder” now, three rungs of metal pierced on the underside of his shaft and glinting up at you with intimidation. You hope Jimin can’t see the now overflowing amount of arousal oozing out of your pussy, squeezing thighs together in a useless attempt of hiding yourself.

“Fuck, didn’t that hurt?” you question, hovering fingers over the balls of silver that protruded on each side in complete awe.

“Of course it did, honey. It’s all worth it, though. It’ll make you feel good too. Need me to take them out?” You shake your head a little too vigorously, earning a chuckle and his middle finger to slide in between your folds unexpectedly. Yiping at the sudden entrance, you cast a glare over his shoulder with his only response being the curve of his digit.

“C-Can I lick it? Can it get infected if you don’t use a condom?” you bombard him with questions, entirely unfamiliar with the subject and entirely enamored by it.

“It’s all healed up, baby. You can do whatever your little heart desires with it. And I would oh so much prefer going bare,” he confirms, and your heart flips at his pet name for you. That, and the thought of his thick, pierced cock penetrating you condom-less.

You wrap your lips around him once more, unafraid to take more and more of his length until you feel the cold metal—your stopping point. Call it your lack of experience, but you prefer not to catch your teeth on those piercings today. You make up for it by sliding a hand back under his scrunched boxers, fondling his balls as you bob diligently. He curses and struggles to keep his body still, digging another digit between your legs to slow your own ministrations. When it works and you moan around his cock, Jimin can’t help but want to play a little game.

“Should I give you a challenge, babe? It’s super simple. Whoever makes the other cum first gets to request something. Anything. Deal?”

“Deahl,” you muffle, swirling your tongue lavishly around his crown. Everything with Jimin was much more… intriguing. Even your first time having sex was turned into some lusty escapade of unexpected metallic embellishments and cheeky gambles. It made you feel something in your veins, wanting more and more of whatever poison Jimin was.

Taking a breath, you lick broadly over his entire shaft and scarcely taste the titanium—more than anything, it was just cold. Jimin shudders at the feeling, punishing you with a third and final finger and pushing downdowndown into a spot all too sensitive for you to focus.

Try as you might, your now pathetic attempts of sucking him off is all forgotten in your own haze of chasing your orgasm. Instead, you rest your head on his hip and writhe against his hand, fucking back onto it while he simultaneously prods your g-spot over and over again until you see stars.

“Giving up already? You were doing so well for a while, you could’ve won,” he lilts.

“Jimin, please make me cum. Oh god,” you wail, legs straining for just that final push…

“Is this what you want?” He slides his thumb across, swiping whatever he could collect and using it to knead at your neglected clit. It’s all you need, pleasure washing over you in tandem of near oversensitivity, a near scream tearing through your lungs that only comes out in ragged whines against his leg.

“Beautiful, sweetheart. Fuck, you’re ruining my sheets over here,” he criticizes, removing his hand with an obscene squelch and moving around in the bed.

The torpor you caught yourself in didn’t render what he was saying, just letting him move you about so your head rests on his pillows while he places himself between your legs.

“Jiminie,” you babble, “fuck me.” He strokes your hair away from your face and smiles, that cute puppy smile that turns his eyes into crescents. The rest of him, though, is purely sinful. Hair sweaty and pieced to perfection as his body taunted you with toned muscles.

“I don’t think you’re ready, honey,” he answers, “even though you’re dripping in your own cum.” He leans back and stares at your pussy without embarrassment, pulling your knees together and watching the juices flow even more. “I should put it to use.”

You peer up at him, curious as to whatever the hell he’s dreaming of over there and inexplicably stunned when you see his dick between your legs. “J-Jimin, what are you doing?”

“Shh, just keep them closed tight,” he orders, fucking himself between the lips of your heat and the warm skin of your thighs. You can’t help but ravish the sight of him as he slicks himself up, eyeing you down as his hips roll into you agonizingly slow. His piercings graze against your nub occasionally, warmth once again growing in your stomach.

“Fuck, you’re so soft and so wet. Who did this to you, hm?” You moan maniacally, angling your hips as to catch him and push inside, but he only laughs degradingly and intentionally misses.

“You think I’m going to fuck you if you can’t even answer this simple question?” he sneers. “Answer like a good girl, then I’ll fuck you into oblivion.”

You scramble for words, initially incoherent and struggling. “Jimin! Shit, Jimin. You made me this way. Ah, you m-make me so wet, so please put it in, put it in and—ha, aah!”

He shoves his length in like it’s all he knew what to do, your ankles to his shoulders so he can drink up your moans with his reddened lips. He was right—the piercings didn’t feel like any dick you’ve received before, it was so much better. This was pornographic, it was so good. He all but pistols into you, his cock grazing places previously untouched. Indulging in his heaven sent strokes, you cry and groan at each relentless thrust.

“Hush, baby, Yoongi’s going to hear your pretty self,” he warns, but you don’t give a shit. If anything, you moan louder with a know-all glint in your eye, testing Jimin’s patience. “Brat,” he spits.

He pounds into you repeatedly, completely removing himself before filling you up again and again and again. Between the pressure to your g-spot and the added stimulation from his Jacob’s Ladder—your stomach heaves, an unfamiliar feeling washing over your abdomen contrary to anything you’ve ever experienced.

“Oh, Jimin, wait!” you sob, halting his hips from another brutal shove a little too late. The second he pulls out, your second orgasm (and first ever untouched orgasm) of the night reigns over, briefly showering his lower stomach in your own wet arousal.

“Holy shit, that’s so fucking hot. Did you just… squirt on me?” he growls, not taking the time to hear your answer as he lifts you into his lap, legs wrapped around his muscular back and arms gripping around his shoulders for dear life.

He sinks back into you deliciously, filling you to the brim with your added weight and rutting up into you to chase his own release. Everything is soaked and sticky, Jimin’s ragged breathing and groans so close to your ear that you’re sure it’ll be engrained into your memory forever, his thrusts so deep inside you wail once more.

Consequently, the banging on the wall next to you comes as no surprise, Yoongi’s angry, “Shut the fuck up!” clear as day. Jimin waves it off.

“Don’t listen baby. Moan louder for me. Tell me where you want my cum.”

The slaps of skin become louder; it wouldn’t be long before Jimin came. “Inside, Jiminie, please. Cum inside me, pump me full,” you squeal, lust sparking inside you knowing that his roommate could hear you getting fucked senseless.

One, two, three more aching pounds before he spills into you, his pretty moans music to your ears. You flop back as soon as he takes himself out, suddenly aching all over from how much he stretched your legs and groaning at the pain.

You slap his eager hand away when he fingers his cum back into your abused lips, “That hurts, idiot.” He smiles and sucks your intermingled cum off his fingers with a pop.

“We taste good together,” he husks. Fuck. “By the way. You came first. Stay the night?”

You oblige with or without the pressure of the bet, dog-tired from your beating and not even fathoming the trek back to your own room. Jimin takes charge in your state of haziness, washing you off in his shower, replacing your uniform with a t-shirt of his own and laying you beside him on his mattress (sheets replaced and refreshed).

“You have piercings in your dick,” you state in the middle of the quiet.

Jimin snorts at the outburst, looping an arm around your side and melding his body to yours, “Yeah, is it weird?”

“… Robot dick,” you whisper, words cracking at the face of your laughter.

“Oh my god.”

“So, when you’re going through metal detectors at airports and whatever, do you have to tell them that the metal’s in your penis? Do they have to check?” Titters are awarded with light jabs to your side, which are then led to screams and kicks to his legs.

Yoongi bursts through Jimin’s door, brows stitched together in heated anger parallel to the flames of hell, “I swear to fucking god, if you two don’t quiet down I’ll mount your heads on my wall, it’ll make a great decoration.”

“What the hell, what if we were naked? Don’t just go busting through—”

“Yeah because you obviously care if I know you two are fucking. ‘Don’t listen, baby! Tell me where you want my cum, baby!’” Yoongi mocks. Pillows are flying and insults are thrown as you watch them bicker sleepily, all fading into white noise as you begin to drift off.

Sleep itself feels like a blink, so exhausted that you don’t dream. Waking in the same position that you were last conscious in, the only difference in picture is the fact that: A) the sun is shining through Jimin’s skylight and B) Jimin is no longer in bed with you.

But before you can even question where he’s run off to, his sly self sneaks back into the bedroom, shirtless and face clean from washing up just now. You don’t even hide the fact that you look down to check out his tight briefs, metal detector in your brain trying to scope it out.

“You’re awake. Sorry if I was loud,” he smiles, crawling on top of you as you stretch out like a mangled cat. You shake your head, combing his hair back with your nails as he dips down into your chest. “I like when you wear my shirts.”

“That’s pretty stereotypical,” you whisper out, voice low and raspy from your slumber. This isn’t fair, you think, he got to brush his teeth already.

He sits up and gives you A Look, making you giggle and giving you the leverage to feel up his abs as he flexes haughtily.

“I can get used to this,” you purr.

“I bet you could,” he mumbles into your neck, nipping at the places he already marked last night. He doesn’t push, just relishes in your warmth and fondles you carefully as you continue to wake up and it makes you shiver.

“I wish you would’ve done this a long time ago,” you sigh.

“You hated me.”

“You didn’t make it easy for me to like you,” you retort, gasping when he bites your collarbone, “Now—Now I like you.”

He stops abruptly and pulls away, landing on his side with an elbow and tilting his head towards you, “Well, I hope you don’t start liking me too much.”

You squint, “W-Why? Don’t tell me this was just a one night stand or anything.”

“No! I mean, not just one night or whatever. I just—this is just casual, right?”

You all but bite your tongue to keep from lashing out, “What do you mean ‘casual’? You didn’t say anything about ‘casual’.”

“Oh, Y/N, c’mon. Did you really think we should date? Look at us, baby. We’re just not… each other’s types, you know?”

It’s about time you get up, shoving aside his warm blankets and grabbing your soiled uniform from the floor, “No, Jimin. I don’t know. I thought you were being genuine with me.”

“Hey, no, don’t leave,” he grabs your arm before you leave his bedroom, “Okay, there was some miscommunication. I’m not trying to be mean. Can I just… I don’t know, think about it? I’m just not used to this.”

Looking into his eyes for some sort of confirmation, your tensions subside. “I’m not a toy. If you don’t want to be with me, just say it.” The hurt he feels in your tone breaks his heart, for once. Would he really be willing to try something he knows won’t work?

For you, maybe.

“I do like you, Y/N. Just give me some time.” He pulls your arm once more, hoping you’ll stay. But you draw the line and pry his hand off politely.

“Of course I’ll give you time. I’ll see you later, okay?” He nods understandingly. He can’t feel butthurt when he’s the one putting you on ice, he knows that. So Jimin watches you leave in his shirt, mind clouded more so than when you arrived.

a/n: yay! you made it through the first part! if you liked it, feel free to let me know or ask any questions to the characters! xx, selene

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syncogon · 4 years

Text

[RS] new poster

maybe im just a huge sucker for space aesthetic?? ahaha but pretty colors

some thoughts/notes/analysis as per usual:

maidang looks REALLY good. like redraw worthy. something about the expression / angle is just :ok_hand:. and i think the thick line style they use for these posters is also just really nice man

also really love diya here, prepping to use her power! please let us see more of her power, spatial powers are so freaking cool

gudong is gudong haha ready to kick some enemy butt

but auroras... is.... it’s painfully obvious they cut/pasted from an actual screenshot, you can tell (see end of this post). shame bc it’s still a cool pose and everything, but the shading and line weights are all off... downsides of studying something too much ahaha

maidang’s dad in his classic pose

MILONG MILONG MILONG MILONG MILONG IT’S BEEN OVER HALF A DECADE SINCE I’VE SEEN YOUR LOVELY FACE. wonderful to see him in the new artstyle finally!!! lowkey he looks a bit tired already tho ahaha. but god please let him join the crew ;_;

shu!!! actually my first thought when i saw her was disappointment bc she’s suffering from the same wardrobe thing as like black widow and plenty of other fighting gals. did they make her boobs even bigger? ugh. PLEASE give the girls realistic outfits, that’s like my one big nitpick with this show, treatment of woman, but. sigh. par for the course. (i miss ponytail/sassy diya...).

but anyway more relevantly about shu - shes so prominent in this poster!! even though she wasn’t in the 30s teaser!!! come on pleaseeee let the shu theory be correct and let it be well-executed and not brushed off. also this shot kind of emphasizes the choppiness of her hair, almost as though she cut it herself actually. hm.

redeye being brooding, nothing new

tang wude!! he made it onto the poster so im happy, please let him play some kind of role still, whether helping or working against our heroes

blind monk guy and kangaroo guy... have already forgotten yalls names rip but their inclusion on this poster is perhaps good for importance-scaling comparison. because i can’t imagine they’ll be *that* important in this movie... but then again, what do i know?

the big question of the poster: who’s the gardener-looking old man?????? for him to make it onto a promotional poster in a decently prominent position, he must be pretty plot significant! but whomst? is he the guy who’s gonna save/exorcise maidang? backstory relevant??

actually im surprised medici didn’t make it on the poster :0

we see the king spaceship at the upper left, midway is the digital screen sorta thing trademark of the competition arenas. behind RS logo is the engine i think? then a row of seven galaxy eye spaceships. then what looks like the stands of the competition?? or maybe some ruins, it’s hard to tell. and most intriguingly, what is the ox-man statue at the center? vaguely reminiscent of the guy teased at at the end of last movie. one of the yayaluo warriors? will we learn more about aunt panda / redeye backstory / that whole shebang?? planet earth things? possibilities endless, there’s so much we don’t know :000

statue closeup:

the aforementioned screencap (from the teaser no less!)

countdown continues aaa let’s go

#rainbow sea #synco talks #i should use this tag more but rip back-tagging #mine

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volturialice · 5 years

Note

Do you think jasper and Alice are intimate and do you think jasper was also intimate with Maria ? Like How much did Alice see ?

ok I have a lot of Thots™ so I basically wrote a 2 page paper in reply to this. in order to answer it I’m gonna have to get into a lot of jasper/maria background stuff so here’s your warning for abuse mentions under the cut. if you wanna skip to the part where I actually answer the questions, it’s about halfway down

i. on jasper and maria

ok, first I think it’s important to note the differences between book canon and movie canon. nowhere in book canon does it state that jasper and maria were ever together in a romantic or physical sense—nowhere. so if that’s your interpretation of canon, it’s totally valid! whomst really knows (or cares, at this point) what smeyer intended?

it makes total sense to me that the movies decided to make their relationship explicitly romantic. for one, it’s an easier and more engaging visual shorthand than jasper just verbally explaining “yeah I was really devoted to her cause and brainwashed and stuff.” for another, it lets us draw the obvious parallels between jasper/maria and riley/victoria, which we really don’t talk about enough and which was another smart visual storytelling move (that scene with maria and victoria whispering to monster!jasper? poetic fucking cinema)

but also, I’m of two minds about the whole thing. on the one hand, the “evil man-eater lady seduces innocent dude and makes him do her evil dirty work by manipulating him through sex” trope is rather icky and tired. I dislike the implication that sex is a woman’s only weapon/the only way she could possibly get this guy to follow her and do her bidding. I dislike the implication that men are all feebleminded, sex crazed monsters and therefore this guy couldn’t possibly have resisted her wicked wiles and it’s not his fault he turned to the dark side. ew.

but on the other hand…I kinda love jasper/maria. and for the record, when I say I ship that, I absolutely do not mean “I think this relationship is healthy and abuse is romantic and I want them to live happily ever after.” nope. no. what I mean is “I find this dynamic fascinatingly horrific and I want to read and write about it a lot.” you may think it’s gross and toxic, and that’s totally valid (see above paragraph.) but as for me, I like pondering about it. I mean, what made him stay with her for eighty years? why did she keep him around? what brought about their alleged “reconciliation” in the present, and how did that all go down? all totally fascinating questions.

and now I think I can tackle the actual questions.

ii. actually answering questions

#1 - Do you think jasper and Alice are intimate? yes. I mean, ymmv but they are married, plus there was that time edward asked jasper about what sex was like lmaooo

#2 - do you think jasper was also intimate with Maria? also yes, but “no” would be an equally valid reading of canon.

#3 - Like How much did Alice see?

this one’s the million dollar question, and one I can only answer via headcanon. I assume you mean “how much did alice see during the ~30 years she was a vampire when she hadn’t yet met jasper but still had visions of him?” so I’m gonna answer that.

it’s an interesting question because canon tells us nothing whatsoever about that time. but I like to think she could see what jasper and the cullens were up to on occasion, though not with the frequency and ease she sees them after they’ve actually met.

as for jasper and maria…I don’t think the romantic/physical part of their relationship lasted all that long. I mean, they were together for eighty years. That’s a really, really long time to fake something. I hc that they were romantically together for a comparatively short chunk of that—maybe just the first decade or two. I’m sure that as jasper learned to use his gift better, he was able to tell that her heart wasn’t really in it, and I think at that point they were both bored of each other anyway and kind of mutually let that part of their relationship fizzle. but they were still absolutely a team, and he was still her right hand man and felt deep and abiding loyalty to her and her cause, until around the time peter showed up (in the 40s, I think.)

so how much did alice see? I think it’s kinda boring to be like “she saw everything!” because that doesn’t leave them very much to work through as a new couple. I think it’s a much more interesting story if jasper has to tell her about all the horrible stuff he did and they both have to come to terms with it. it’s one of the things I find super compelling about them as a ship, actually.

buuuut I think alice saw enough to get the gist. I think when jasper confessed to her that “yeah, I was with maria” she kind of already knew that, but I also think it was important to her to hear it from him and get his side of the story. we stan some good communicators, folks.

#asks #anonymous #meta #abuse mentions //#jasper hale #maria #alice cullen #jalice #jasper/maria

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sage-nebula · 5 years

Text

I saw Endgame

And overall I liked it, although I think I liked Infinity War more. I really want to make a long post detailing all my feelings in a coherent way, but I’m not sure I’m in the headspace to do it now, and I can’t do it at a later date because the memories won’t be as fresh, so I’m just going to make a list that might be all over the place beneath the cut (with TREMENDOUS SPOILERS, obviously).

Things I Loved:

Peter was the catalyst for Tony deciding to help with the time machine business. This isn’t specifically stated, it’s not said out loud, but it didn’t have to be. Tony turned Steve and the others down. He flat out refused to help them. But when he caught sight of that photo of him and Peter? When he remembered just who he had lost? That was when he decided to see if he could find a way to make time travel work. Peter was his motivation. I think that for the most part he was repressing his grief over Peter (and more on that in a bit), but he couldn’t repress it entirely, not when a photo of Peter being so exuberant and happy was staring him right in the face. If there was any glimmer of hope at getting Peter back, Tony was going to take it. Yeah, he cared about the trillions of others, too---but Peter was the catalyst, Peter was the reason he was willing to take the risk, and I loved that.

THE REUNION HUG. Honestly, this should have been first on my list, but I’m not going to erase the above paragraph. GOD, if I don’t get ten million gifsets of both that hug, and also how it’s development from the “this is not a hug, we’re not there yet” scene in Homecoming, I’m going to lose my mind. Fuck, the fact that Tony couldn’t even speak, the fact that he just pulled Peter into his arms and hugged him so tightly, hugged him tighter when Peter said “this feels nice” was just everything to me. I could watch that for ten hours. Also, Peter’s rambling preceding the hug was fucking adorable. “Do you remember when we were in space? And I got all dusty and then I must have passed out or something because I woke up and you were gone, but Dr Strange was there and he said five years had passed and we had to go---” NO WONDER TONY HUGGED THE BUHJEEZUS OUT OF HIM. HE HASN’T HEARD THAT RAMBLING FOR FIVE YEARS, DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH HE MISSED HIS BOY? NO WORDS NEEDED TO BE SAID THERE. THAT HUG SAID IT ALL.

Peter in general, honestly. Tom Holland didn’t get to do very much in this movie, for obvious reasons, but he stole every single goddamn scene he was in. The reunion rambling, everything he said while he had the gauntlet and was trying to get it to the van, THE FACT THAT HE GOT A MOMENT WITH PEPPER WHERE SHE SAVED HIM, his scream when he was on Valkyrie’s pegasus, and of course the heartbroken sobbing when Tony died. I do wish that Tony had been more coherent at that point, that he’d been able to tell Peter that he was proud of him, and I also kind of wish that Peter hadn’t called him “Tony” because I’m going to be real with you, I like how he calls him “Mr Stark.” But everything else about it was perfect, including the bit where Rhodey had to pull Peter away because Peter was just falling to pieces. (And note, I mean as perfect as it can get given that Tony died, but you know.)

The fear in Thanos’ eyes when he headbutted Carol and she didn’t even FLINCH. I do have some issues with Carol’s (lack of) involvement in this movie, which I’ll get to later, but while it was unrealistic that Thanos got the jump on her at any point (please), the fact that she didn’t flinch when he headbutted her and just the TRUE FEAR IN HIS EYES KJFDSKFJDS. GOD. I love Carol so much. Oh Captain, My Captain.

Morgan requesting a cheeseburger, just like her daddy, and Happy saying he’ll get her all the cheeseburgers she wants. I don’t even have anything to add onto this. It just made me cry even more than I already was.

Loki stealing the Tesseract (AGAIN) as a way to bring him back. Apparently Loki is going to be in a new TV show streaming on Disney’s service (whether it’s the same one Sam and Bucky are going to have, I’m not sure), so this was a clever way to ensure that Loki can make a comeback in the future without having to have found a way to revive him, and only him, from Infinity War. Of course, this also means that the Loki we see in the TV show or whatever won’t have any of the character development post-Avengers, which is . . . eh . . . but it’s better than having him be permanently dead, I guess. (Also, did anyone tell Thor this happened? No? Someone might want to fill him in so he can be cautious when picking up snakes for the foreseeable future.)

Thor getting Mjolnir back, and then dual wielding. Though the dual wielding was more temporary than I would have liked (more on that in a bit, too), I love dual wielding so I was happy to see him doing it, and also I love Mjolnir (a.k.a. “mya-mya”) so I was happy to see that back, too. It put a definite smile on my face.

Valkyrie being the new Queen of Asgard. No offense to Thor, because I get that he was going through a lot, but he was also being a terrible king, particularly since I don’t think he ever really wanted to be king, anyway. Like he accepted the duty because he felt he had to, not because he wanted to, and so I think it’s good that he’s going to get out there and see new parts of the universe (and hopefully clean himself up some, and also not actually answer to Quill because I mean, come on). That said, Valkyrie was the one keeping everything in order, and she deserves to be queen. I love her. I’m so happy for her.

All the ladies coming forward to back up Carol. I mean, Carol doesn’t really need backup, but I looooved seeing all the ladies assemble ready to beat some fucking ass. The MCU has such powerful women and a good number of them, too, and I love that that was highlighted in that moment of this film. It was a great moment.

Nebula’s character development. She’s had such an arc despite being in so few movies and I love it. I loved how invested she was in the paper football game she played with Tony. I love how she took care of him, even in gentle ways such as moving him off the floor and onto a chair. I love how she killed her past self in order to save Gamora without a second of hesitation, as well as how she talked Gamora into turning against Thanos long before it happened in the timeline we know. (On that note, I’m fine with how they’re keeping Gamora in the picture, and I laughed at her “whomst” expression when Quill approached her jkdlsfds.) Nebula had a great arc and I loved it, although I can’t believe she didn’t warn Natasha and Clint about how they’d have to get the Soul Stone. Like, she knew. Why didn’t she say anything?

Sam getting a private goodbye with Steve, and having the shield passed onto him. I’m okay with the fact that Steve did get a happy ending. I always shipped him with Peggy and I think that, overall, he was just not happy in our time period, even if he had some moments of happiness, so I think that being able to go back in time and live the life he actually wanted was a good ending for him. But I’m also glad that Sam got that private goodbye, as well as the shield, because Sam goddamn deserved that after everything he’s been through and everything he gave to Steve’s cause. Sam doesn’t get enough respect in-universe or out of it, so I was glad to see him get this. On that note, I also like the fact that Bucky knew before Steve even left that Steve wasn’t coming back, and that he was the one to draw Sam away and point him to where he needed to be.

There’s probably more that deserves to be in this list, but these are the only things I can think of right now. More can always be added later, especially if / when I see the movie a second time.

Things I’m Okay With:

Tony’s death. I know this sounds like a weird thing to be okay with, but hear me out. Obviously, my preference would be for Tony to be alive, and still making appearances in future movies, such as Far From Home. But the thing is, we already know that he’s not going to be in Far From Home. He’s not in any of the trailers, it’s been confirmed again and again that he’s not in that movie. We know that Peter is still involved with Stark Industries and the Stark family, but Tony himself is not around. And fam, the only way that makes sense from a character standpoint is if Tony is dead. Tony retiring from being Iron Man wouldn’t necessitate him taking himself out of Peter’s life. He just wouldn’t do that, not after he already lived five years without him because of the snap. So if Tony were alive, but he just decided, “I’ve got my own kid now, I don’t need Peter anymore”? That would be so disgustingly out of character I’d drop all future movies in . . . well, a snap. So in that sense, I’m okay with Tony dying since RDJ didn’t want to do any future movies, and if he’s not doing future movies and isn’t going to be in Peter’s life anymore, then the only way that makes sense without assassinating his character is to assassinate him. It’s sad and I cried, but at least this doesn’t destroy Iron Dad & Spider-Son, which, as selfish as this may sound, is what’s most important to me. I can live with this, especially since fanfic exists for this very reason.

Carol’s lack of presence in the movie. This is very nearly a “Thing I Didn’t Like,” but I’m putting it here because I understand it. Thing is, Carol is too strong for Thanos. Carol could atomize Thanos if she was allowed to do so. And forget Thanos; Carol could take out literally every member of his army in a second if she was allowed to do so. The thing is, that also takes all stakes out of the movie, as well as negates the need for Tony to make the heroic sacrifice he did. And while they did weaken her a little and let Thanos overpower her for a second (unrealistic tbh), they couldn’t weaken her enough to conceivably have her not end that battle, and as such they just took her out of the movie entirely, for the most part, with the excuse that “other planets need me and they don’t have you.” And like, again, I get it. Carol is too OP. If she stuck around the movie would have been a lot shorter. But at the same time it bummed me out because she’s my favorite hero, so I did want to see her doing more things than what she was allowed to do.

The lack of quantity of Iron Dad & Spider-Son. Don’t get me wrong, quality wise it was almost perfect. The only way it could have been more perfect would be if Tony had managed to tell Peter that he was proud of him while he was dying (especially since Peter apologized to Tony, meaning that Peter blames himself for Tony’s death), and if, when telling Steve that they had to keep what they’d gained in the past five years at all costs, Tony had explained his reasoning as, “I already lost one kid. I’m not gonna lose another.” My entire year would have been made had Tony said that line. The literal entire thing. But while the quality was great, I do wish that we could have felt Peter’s presence more in Tony’s life. Like, again, Peter was the catalyst for Tony getting involved at all, and that was great, but I just wanted . . . more. There was a lot going on in this movie, and I get that, and there’s also the fact that I got the feeling that Tony repressed what happened with Peter hard over the past five years, that he had to repress it or else he wouldn’t have been able to function. Like part of me was surprised that no one brought up Peter when they were trying to get Tony to help with the time machine, but at the same time I also think that Steve at the least knew they’d get hit if they did that. But I felt a lot of repression going on, repression that was ripped off once Tony caught sight of that picture, but at the same time once that repression was ended I kind of wish the floodgates had opened. I wish that Tony would have had the line about not wanting to lose another kid. I wish that when thinking about time traveling back to New York, there would have been a moment when Tony would think about returning to New York during a time when Peter Parker was still alive. I wish that Tony would have made mention after Bruce’s snap about Peter being stuck in space, or that he would have told Peter at the end that he was proud of him, or that Peter would have been present during the final message hologram, and so on and so forth. I’m okay with what little we got because it was excellent, there was a lot going on, and also Tony was repressing (with the floodgates truly opening once Peter was babbling in front of him again), but since this was our absolute last chance to get Iron Dad & Spider-Son with both of them alive, I really do wish we had gotten more. I’m okay with it, but I’m still kind of sad.

Bruce being Hulk physically all the time now. This is also almost a “didn’t like,” because it’s just . . . weird . . . but I’m also okay with it, I guess. He reminded me of Beast from X-Men, and I didn’t really see a reason for him to be like this, especially since we’re just told how he got to that point, rather than shown. It was just kind of . . . weird. It could have been done better.

Thor traveling with the Guardians. I kind of hope this is just a temporary thing, because as I mentioned, I don’t very much like the idea of him answering to Quill, and I also feel like he’s less of a team player and more of a solo artist. I’m okay with it for now because at least he’s not dead or wallowing anymore, and also it means that Valkyrie gets to be Queen of New Asgard, but I really hope it’s just temporary because he deserves more than to be just another crew member on that ship.

Again, more could probably go here, but this is what I’ve got for now.

Things I Didn’t Like:

Steve wielding Mjolnir. I get that this was a callback to Age of Ultron, and specifically the scene where they all tried to wield Mjolnir and couldn’t, but it did tremble a bit under Steve’s grasp, but I didn’t like it. I don’t hate Steve, by any means, but particularly after all that shit in Civil War I don’t think he’s worthy, and it also doesn’t make a lot of sense to me that he just magically knows how to flawlessly use Mjolnir with no practice or training. Sure, Thor picked it up quickly, but Thor is also an Asgardian. It doesn’t make sense that Steve, a human, would know how. And also, Thor’s “I knew it!” was strange, considering he seemed anxious about the possibility of Steve being able to wield Mjolnir in Age of Ultron. Like it was just . . . I didn’t like it. Especially since it cut so much into Thor’s dual wielding time. On that note . . .

Thor. Just . . . Thor all around. Aside from how his “let himself go” look was his look for the entire movie, I felt like his portrayal in this movie was really . . . shallow, flat, and lacked all of the emotional weight he carried in Infinity War. Like in Infinity War he was raw with grief, he’d just lost everyone, and you could feel that in every action he took. And yeah, he felt that he failed at the end of that movie, even though he did kill Thanos, so it makes sense that he’d need time to process that grief. But five years of processing led him to lose all the emotional weight he had originally. Like, we were supposed to get the feeling that this was Thor grieving, but it just didn’t feel that way. Moreover, it felt like they were trying to bring in Ragnarok flavored humor with him, but it didn’t work because it didn’t fit the tone of the movie. I usually love Thor, he’s always been one of my faves, but I just was not vibing with him in this movie. The dual wielding was cool, as was his excitement to get Mjonir back, but the rest of it? Bleh.

Natasha’s death. I mean, I get it on some level. I get that she didn’t have a family to go back to, whereas Clint did. I get that Scarlett Johansson probably didn’t want to do any more MCU movies / her contract was up. But that doesn’t make me feel any more okay that yet another woman was fridged so that Clint could have some manpain. It doesn’t make feel any more okay that a character who actually routinely did things and contributed in these movies (Nat) was sacrificed for one who pretty much never does anything ever (Clint). To be fair, far more male characters were removed from the cast in this movie than female ones, but that doesn’t make this jive with me any more. I was totally rooting for Clint to bite it instead. Like let him do something for once in these movies, ffs.

Harley being present at Tony’s funeral. Look, I’m going to be honest: Harley had no reason to be there. I get that he was in Iron Man 3 and that he was like the prototype for the Iron Dad we’d all come to love, but that’s the thing: He was the prototype, he was like foreshadowing. From a narrative perspective, Harley’s purpose was to foreshadow how Tony was with kids, so that when he met Peter in Civil War and came to bond with him over the course of the following films, we’d be able to see where that paternal side of Tony came from. There’s a reason why Harley was not seen or mentioned after Iron Man 3, and it’s because his narrative purpose was fulfilled, and therefore Tony presumably didn’t have any further contact with him after that. And I mean, no offense to those who liked Harley or his role in Iron Man 3, but the Tony & Harley relationship was not the one that was developed over the course of the following movies. Again, he wasn’t shown, nor was he even mentioned. Instead, it was Tony & Peter in Civil War, Homecoming, and Infinity War. Harley might as well have not even existed. The only reason I even recognized him was because I knew ahead of time that he was going to be in the film. My best friend (who I saw the movie with) didn’t even recognize him and was wondering who tf he was. So to that end, I just . . . I don’t think it was necessary for him to be there. Like it felt more like a move for us, the audience, of them saying “see, Tony impacted all these people, everyone who was important at some point in his life is there.” But it didn’t even really work that way because the funeral was so small and private. So it just seemed really random for Harley to be there, when he hasn’t been relevant at all since Iron Man 3. And I know it’s not that big a deal and I honestly wouldn’t care, except every time I see something about “Morgan and her big brother Harley” or “Tony’s three kids” I can’t help but roll my eyes because, no. There was nothing post-Iron Man 3 that would lead us to believe that Tony considered Harley to be like a son to him. The fact that Harley was standing awkwardly way in the back at the funeral, instead of up front where Peter and Morgan were, says it all. If Harley had been present in movies following Iron Man 3 and we actually saw his relationship with Tony on-screen, okay, fine. But that’s clearly not the case, and wasn’t even in the case in this movie (like he was clearly not around for those five years!) so it just . . . I don’t know. It felt really unnecessary to me. I’m not a fan. (And I know some people are like, “He’s going to pick up the mantle from Tony, he’s going to be Iron Lad!” which gets a very hard no from me, for two reasons: 1.) If anyone is picking up the torch from Tony, it’s Peter. Peter has been Tony’s protégé for the past several movies, Peter is the one that the Russos have specifically said had a father-son relationship with Tony, Peter is the one that Tony made tech for and trained, the one who was sobbing by his side when he died. If anyone is picking up the torch from Tony, it’s Peter. 2.) If it’s not Peter, it’s Tony’s biological daughter Morgan. Yes, she’s too young now, but give her some time and she’d make a fantastic Iron Lady, or even Ironheart if they don’t want to introduce Riri. Morgan has far more reason to pick up that mantle than Harley does, just like Peter. Send Harley back to Tennessee where he belongs and stop acting like he’s super mega important when he clearly wasn’t important enough to even get name dropped after his initial appearance in any of the movies before this one. Jesus.)

Thanos going from “you drew blood from me, I respect that” to “you keep resisting me so I’m going to enjoy killing you.” Like, it just made him seem so petty? I feel like it would have made more sense for him to make the jump to “I’ll kill EVERYONE and make a WHOLE NEW UNIVERSE this time” if his rationale was “I can’t have anyone around trying to undo what I do.” It would have felt more in line with his characterization from Infinity War. I get it, Thanos is a sociopath, no one is arguing with that. But he wasn’t a petty sociopath in Infinity War, so it feels a bit disappointing to me that they made him such a petty, smug bastard in Endgame. I liked him more when he was acting like a Well-Intentioned (In His Mind) Extremist than a Petty Purple Bitch.

And once again, there could possibly be more here, but this is all I can think of for now.

All in all, I did like it, just not as much as I liked Infinity War, and that probably has to do with (as I said) the fact that Infinity War had more Iron Dad & Spider-Son content / interactions, and that’s my favorite relationship in the whole MCU, so obviously I’m going to prefer the movies where that’s a bigger focus. But I did like Endgame well enough all the same, and I can’t wait for Far From Home this summer. And on that note, some wishes for it:

The reason why Peter doesn’t have the Iron Spider suit in Far From Home is because it hurts too badly to wear / he doesn’t feel like he deserves it after what happened to Tony. I want to see his grief over Tony’s death brought up.

An AI / hologram message that Tony made for Peter at some point.

May to not date Happy, but instead to bond with Pepper, and for them to eventually find love again in each other’s arms and get married so that Peter and Morgan can be official stepsiblings. (Like Peter is Morgan’s big brother anyway, but this would make it Official™.) Happy can date someone else. (Also I know that May is Peter’s aunt and not his mom, technically, but come on. She might as well be his mom.)

But that’s it for now. Time to go nurse the pain with some fics (including potentially a couple of my own.)

#mcu #endgame #avengers endgame #irondad and spiderson #mcu spoilers #avengers spoilers #endgame spoilers #avengers endgame spoilers #avengers 4 spoilers #irondad & spiderson

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keepyourpantsongohan · 6 years

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Ayesha Liveblogs Free! S1-S2

Good lord there are really only five English VAs huh

I appreciate the level of existential dread it takes to sit in a bathtub in a bathing suit

Apron designers I have some questions!!! Firstly: Whomst?

“Anything has magical properties if you believe hard enough” I love Nagisa

“What can I say, I’m a romantic” so what I’m gathering is that Haru and Rin were small and in love with each other

Update from one minute later: Angry with each other now, I guess?

That’s right Haru you wear that swimsuit all day!!! But wash it bc that’s not a breathable fabric trust me you’re asking for trouble

“You only live once so do what you want” Dghdfjghjkhkjdf I can’t believe that Amakata’s contribution to this disciplinary lecture amounts to “yolo”

Makoto really knows how to get Haru to do things he doesn’t want to do all he’s gotta do is whisper “pool” and there he is

“What is wrong with you” I hope that Haru continues to strip to reveal his swimsuit no matter where they are throughout this anime. The doctor’s office. A dog park. The mall. Pls let this be a trope

What the shit is this Arabian nights outro this is a Japanese high school swim anime lmao

There’s a joke to be made about the visual metaphor of Haru needing to quench his thirst in the ending but I’ll refrain

How do their teachers keep finding out about their trespassing who is telling on these boys

What is Ms. Amakata’s previous job what kind of swim job could possibly be inappropriate to talk about at school

Omg Kou is so thirsty for swim boys and while I can’t really relate I appreciate her enthusiasm

HARU’S STRIPPING AT THE FISH STORE THEY REALLY COMMITTED TO THE “I’LL SWIM ANYWHERE” TROPE I LOVE IT

“I promised myself that I’d never wear a swimsuit again” omg she was a swimsuit model

So Haru quit swimming because Rin is a sore loser? Suspect and lame

“No, come back, you’ll die!” Makoto is truly the highlight of this show and the friend Haru needs

Haru pls I’m weeping

Amakata: They might approve your request [if you win a swimming competition]

Haru, already taking off his clothes: LET’S GET TO WORK

“He’s just like us! He’s a guy, but he’s got a girly name!” What kind of dumbass logic for deciding who joins your swim team Nagisa lmao

“You talk about Haru a lot” Hahaha it’s bad form to bring up other people you admire when you’re flirting Nagisa, Rei is Offended™

Ffdhkdshfkhfkj he hasn’t gotten in the water yet but I’m pretty sure Rei can’t fucking swim

“That would’ve meant admitting defeat, and I’m not adept at that” okay I love Rei too this ensemble cast is so funny

Rei’s so cute omg his small and betrayed “but why” when he can’t float

Is it truly an anime without a rivalry-friendship with blatant homoerotic overtones

Oh wow that’s a weird thing for Rin’s sister to have to watch lmao

“Let the water guide you” “Could you try to be less abstract about this” I’m giggling at Haru just throwing out platitudes and hoping one sticks

“I’ll have you know that I have the constitution of a samurai” Rei you are by far the best part of this show so far

Wait a hot minute what in the hell happened in the ocean why do you have to say it like that Haru

Really if any Haru’s relationships are going to err on the side of romantic it should probably be with Makoto because they’re like actually friends and support each other lmao

I don’t know what’s wilder about this scene Makoto using his trauma to convince Haru to swim relay or the Gaze™ that follows

“You’d be the newlywed couple that gets killed in the first five minutes” HMMMM newlywed couple huh

This episode is soooo cute I love the boys bonding together in starlight

Wow was Rin’s problem with Haru just latent daddy issues all along I completely misread this situation

WAIT WAS RIN’S DAD ONE OF THE PEOPLE WHO DIED ON THE FISHERMAN’S BOAT

“It’s hard to explain, that’s just the way they are” “What’s that supposed to mean” people are gay, Rei

Why do the people on this show have such weird interpersonal relationships do you really need to hold Rin’s ankles for this conversation, Aiichiro

Regardless of her thirst Kou is really the best manager they could ask for

“I will relish destroying you” okay calm down Swimsuit Sasuke

“This victory means I never have to swim with you again. Ever” were you not the one constantly harassing Haru for competitions???? What’s your problem Rin!!!

Haru looking at Mako like swimming has meaning again I don’t care if this is friendship or romance THAT’S LOVE BITCH

“It’s not that easy in real life huh” a weirdly realistic turn of events

Honestly Haru what a mood I never want anyone to contact me either

God could Mako and Haru’s relationship stop being the cutest in the world? This sleeping in the hallway for Haru to come home will not stand! Thanks

“Why is an amateur like that swimming with them?” BECAUSE THEY’RE NICE AND LIKE EACH OTHER, RIN

THEY WON!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I LOVE THEM

“That’s what you’re supposed to say if you arrive early for a date” IWATOBI SWIM TEAM DOUBLE DATE CONFIRMED (as if the outfits were not confirmation enough)

Gfgkfugkfg Rei is so put out Nagisa will not acknowledge his “exsquidsite” pun

This Rin/Haru/Mako dynamic could not be more like Ex-Boyfriend vs. New Boyfriend I’m wheezing

“Hah, I’m a ninja” REI YOU’RE SO STUPID I LOVE YOU

“I hope he’s okay” Aiichiro is a better pal that Rin deserves this is such a one-sided friendship lmao

AW REI FEELS LEFT OUT OF THE MEMORIES POOR GUY

Is Rei gonna go pick a fight with Rin because I’d kind of be up for that

“I wanted to know what your feelings are towards Haru” Dad Mode Activated you will not hurt Rei’s buddies

“Don’t get in the way. If you do, I will never forgive you,” damn Rei!!! You’re not even his friend but those words packed a wallop

I like that each of these swim team boys has a friend whom they are closest to it’s nice and balanced

“Every single member of this team is irreplacable” LOVE AND SUPPORT!

I can’t tell if Rin invited Rei out to this ominous night meeting as overture of friendship or as a threat

Aiichiro get a new friend!!! You don’t deserve to be treated this way

AHHHHHHHHHHH REI YOU’RE SO GOOD “I feel the exact same way” you empathetic sweetheart <3

WOW I do NOT approve of this Rin treats everyone like garbage for twelve straight episodes and then they reward this garbage behaviour by giving up Rei’s spot on the team just so Rin can enjoy swimming again??? Boooooo he doesn’t even go to your school

These fuckin flower petals FIND YOURSELF A HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP HARU

“Come on Matsuoka!” AGAIN, way better friend than Rin deserves

LET REI IN THE GROUP HUG HE’S THE BEST ONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

“Well I’m thoroughly confused” ME TOO AMAKATA!!!! HOW DID THIS SOLVE ANYTHING

Ten seconds into this second series and Mako continues to prove he’s The Best by cuddling cats to keep them warm

“You look good” “Stop patronizing me, damn it!” Rei and Nagisa’s relationship is also really a highlight of this show

“Rin’s far from the obvious choice for Mikoshiba’s replacement” that’s valid Rei, Rin has had a lot of trouble with the concept of being a team player thus far in his Samezuka career

“Just when you thought it was safe to cosplay” it is never safe to cosplay. Just ask all those Sasukes who got arrested

LMAO AT THIS DUMBASS STRIP SHOW IN FRONT OF THEIR SCHOOL

“My triceps are guaranteed to drive you out of your mind” I’M SCREAMIN THESE YOUTHS ARE AN EMBARRASSMENT TO SOCIETY

“You really gotta stop calling me sir, just drop it okay” “Yes s-eugokay” Beautiful voice acting. Iconic

Oh god please don’t give Haru another rival one was really enough

I never thought I’d say this but that was the most wholesome kidnapping in the world

Rin saying “Life after graduation” in the same tone as one might say “Life after death” is honestly a mood

Sosuke’s only had about five seconds of screen time but I’m gonna guess he’s Rin’s Australian ex-boyfriend

Update: Just his homie from elementary school I guess that’s fair

“So this is what a nationally-ranked swimmer’s build looks like” Aiichiro pls could you check Sosuke out with a little more subtlety

“He’s the type of rival you can become obsessed with” AHHHHH Rin has been #calledout I think I like Sosuke

Okay you’re allowed to just be friends I’m just saying that runs on the beach in the moonlight are not always the most platonic activity, Haru and Makoto

Omg Mako’s siblings love Rei I love it!!!!!

FDdkfhkdjhf I was certain Mikoshiba’s little brother would also have the hots for Kou but it’s still funny

You go Kou judging the muscle contest live your dream

“If you know what’s good for you, you’ll stay out of Rin’s way” Wow Sosuke that was a HARD 180 chill tf out

Omf I can’t believe it took me this long to realize that Aiichiro and Rin were roommates and it wasn’t just Aiichiro showing up in Rin’s room every night like “hey”

“Preferably ones with wonderful muscles and tight washboard abs!” “Yeah!!” Iwatobi Swim Club pls

Does this mean that the Makoto and Haru go on midnight runs bc Haru is slow as all hell on land lmao

YEAH REI’S TRACK EXPERTISE BECOMING RELEVANT AYYYYY

Omg Nagisa nudging Rei’s shoulder is fucking adorable ahhhhhh

Rei’s plans: Being sad about your personal inadequacies (what a mood)

“Do you really think I’d be dumb enough to fall prey to something so preposterously illogical as love” CALLING IT RIGHT NOW REI’S GONNA FALL IN LOVE

Lmao @ Momo checking out Rin’s cleavage this is truly the weird “all siblings have the same taste in crushes” universe

“I THINK HE MIGHT HAVE BEEN REI’S BOYFRIEND” Okay 1) This is stupid but the part of me that actually wants these shows to have a diverse spectrum of sexuality is lured in thanks I hate it, and 2) How dare you Rei’s boyfriend is Nagisa

[Makoto voice] This is a swimtervention

AHHHHHHH EVERYBODY LOVES REI (AS THEY SHOULD)

I bet Rei’s going to train in his time off because he wants to catch to the boys <3

Update: He’s getting Rin to teach him finally some helpful friendship times from Rin!!!! Good job

“Which do you think I’d look more swole in” omg who wrote this dialogue

Pls Sosuke don’t use this childhood joke debt as an excuse to be like “Don’t hang out with your old homies anymore”

“I need to sit on it for a little longer, that’s all”

Sosuke, internally, probably: Kiss me

“I want you to think of me as part of your team” FINALLY SOME OPEN AND HONEST COMMUNICATION ABOUT YOUR EMOTIONS

Woo woo positive character development for Rin prioritizing friendship over competition this is such a nice turn

Uh oh why is Nagisa lying about his motives for camping has he been kicked out of his house for stripping in public

I grow more and more concerned for Nagisa with every scene

“We said no and we meant it” I can’t believe that Makoto and Haru are Nagisa’s new parents wow

Well we know who the good cop parent is, Makoto had a conversation with Nagisa and exactly one (1) second later was convinced they had to rescue him

Update from 30 seconds later: I spoke too soon he got Haru too “I’ve decided to let him stay with me” THESE NERDS

But why do you have to unbutton your shirt a little in order to negotiate Rei

“Studying became like some kind of torture” that’s depression honey

This soft glowing light while Rei tells Nagisa to follow his dreams is so sweet but also jdhkjfhkdjh what if his parents are just mean

These boys are the definition of ride or die they’re in this empty ass pool area still trying to hide their friend behind their backs what absolute best boys are these

“Haru” “I’m sneaky” CUTE!!!! Also good call on not calling mum but on calling Trusted Adult instead

“You can’t quit. I won’t let you” AHHHH THAT’S LOVE!!! REI <3

The matching swimsuit pose god every moment of this show kills me

“We’re a team! If we can’t do it together what’s the point?” WOW I CAN’T BELIEVE MAKOTO AND HARU HAVE BEEN A TEAM LITERALLY SINCE THEY WERE BABIES! PICK UP THE PHONE AND SMELL THE HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP

“Here, dolphin’s yours” Oh!!! Makoto has also been selfless since birth he just wants Haru to be happy but Haru just wants him to be happy too 😭😭😭😭😭😭

I also like this Matsuoka siblings bonding this is what I wanted from the beginning tbh

Aiichiro you superstitious little nerd

“I want to know what it feels like to kick your ass” what a hard swerve Makoto pls

“Congratulations, between the two of us you’re still the best in the water, how awesome is that?” “Hah, you’re so weird” I’ve never seen someone so excited to lose Makoto is truly the best boy I love this relationship

Aw is Makoto jealous of Haru’s relationship with Rin? I 100% buy it but baby!!! You are so good there’s no need to worry

I’m so proud of the Iwatobi boys for qualifying for regionals and also I bet this means that the Samezuka boys will win relay

Update from an ep later: I was correct

“Don’t limit yourself kid” are you not... the same age as him Sosuke???

Working theory is that Makoto wants Haru to care about being scouted so they can go to the same school together and swim there

“I wonder what Haru wants to do after graduation” be a mermaid

Sosuke really needs to get in touch with his emotions good grief

“But I am sure about one thing, I love it and I don’t want to stop” in all seriousness do people intentionally write these relationships as romantically-charged or is that just something that happens? Like this 100% reads as an allegory for discovering your sexuality

Ahhhh Makoto helping the babies I know I’ve said this a million times in the past few episodes but he’s the best boy

“I haven’t thought about [Kisumi] in who knows how long” Wow does everyone in this show have an ex-boyfriend who suddenly pops up to stir up drama bc it sure seems like it

There’s probably some symbolism in Haru handing off of a boxed lunch

“But isn’t it... scary?” “Only til it’s not” Oh my goooood I love this swim teaching arc I love Makoto I just!!! HE’S THE BEST

Ahhhh Haru bringing Makoto’s siblings to see him at work this is disgustingly domestic and I love it

“If he’s competing at the regional level I’m guessing that means they fixed [Sosuke’s shoulder]!” Wow Kisumi was truly just here to inspire some drama omg

Ffgkdfjjkhg this elevator stand-off it’s the Battle of Rin’s Overly Intimate Swim Partners

Oh no Haru is having an anxiety attack yikes but I get it

HARU NO AHHH THIS SUCKS COMPETITIVE SPORTS ARE SO UPSETTING

Man this was a real traumatizing episode what the fuck Free! You lulled me into a false sense of security how dare you

“We don’t do things for each other. That’s just how we are” Ddfksdjhfkjhfd even Baby Sosuke had a lot of true processing how a friendship should work wow

“I trust him implicitly, he’ll be here” idk homies Haru’s sort of in the middle of an Anxiety Episode those don’t usually go well

“I realize it’s over for me. But before I go, I want swim the best damn relay I can. With you. Today.” Wow Sosuke finally connects with his emotions and proves himself as Good Boyfriend Material in one swing

Is it really a swim meet if Rin doesn’t have a dramatic outdoor confession of feelings with a former rival

Samezuka you’re adorable but also a health hazard where’s your adult

MY BOYS MADE IT TO NATIONALS I’M GONNA CRY

“Look at Sosuke, being a big cheese ball” CHARACTER GROWTH

“I think I finally found what I was looking for” “Took you long enough” okay this seriously reads like an allegory for coming to terms with your sexuality Sosuke I have so many thoughts

Amakata is such a good teacher she won’t let Haru be slandered

I’m glad the boys are getting some acknowledgement but poor Haru

“You never hear someone talk about their last summer” TITLE REFERENCE

Wooooooow Sosuke’s really here to tell Haru to keep going just for Rin’s sake this is almost the opposite of their first confrontation but it’s still about how much Sosuke cares about Rin what kind of single-minded boyfriend antics

“Why the hell are you so hung up on Rin” LOVE, HARU, LOVE!!

Haru methinks Makoto was about to make an important declaration quit evading your friend/future (she said, hypocritically)

[Makoto voice] Swimtervention: The Sequel

YES MAKOTO GO HELP HARU YOU KNOW HIM BEST

“Why don’t you understand that we love you” AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH MAKOTO #1 BOY MOST IN TOUCH WITH HIS EMOTIONS BEST FRIEND GOOD BOYFRIEND MATERIAL BUT ALSO JUST A WONDERFUL BOY WHO WANTS HARU HAPPY

Okay okay I’m not trying to project romance onto this narrative (that’s a lie I’ve been sold on romance for a while) but like.... fireworks!!! Fireworks going off in the background while they stand in front of each other in silhouette PICK UP THE PHONE ANIMATORS

“You and Makoto had a falling out, huh?” Omg not only does Rin pinpoint Haru’s problem right away he’s also making a direct parallel to him and Sosuke’s relationship my kinda amicable exes

“It was our first fight” I’M WHEEZING THIS IS LIKE THAT EPISODE OF FRIENDS WHERE CHANDLER EXPERIENCES FIGHTING IN A RELATIONSHIP FOR THE FIRST TIME AND HE’S LIKE ‘GUESS WE’RE BROKEN UP’ AND MONICA’S LIKE ‘???? NO?’

Am I supposed to read little Rin telling his host family that Haru had eyes that look like the ocean in a platonic way because.... buddy

God I love Rin’s Australian family they’re so sweet and understanding

Ddfalsfjdskljf EXPLAIN THIS!!!

Russell: So mate, got a girlfriend back home?

Rin: Eummm, long story, or not actually [awkward laughter]

BED SHARING TROPES OH MY GOD!! THEY ARE LEANING INTO THIS PSEUDO-ROMCOM ANGLE EXCEPT THEY’VE BOTH GOT OTHER DUDES IN THEIR LIVES LMAO WHAT WOULD MAKOTO AND SOSUKE THINK

Rin and Haru don’t even wear the same style of swimsuit so lol @ Rin bringing a different suit across the world specifically to make Haru swim in it

OMG HARU JUST DISCOVERED HIS DREAM I LOVE IT

Aw are Haru and Makoto going to end up separated bc of their different dreams because I’m gonna be very upset

I’m so touched by Makoto’s dream of helping children even if Makoto can’t fully be in the next season because it’s a Haru-centric show I still love him so much 4ever

Hahaha at them recapping the whole show I guess they didn’t know that there would be a third season

“C’mon you two, no more tears” what sweet sobbing boys you’re pulling at my heartstrings

“We’ll always be a team” HECK YEAH YOU WILL

Yay for Rei getting his own swim hallucination!!!! That’s my boy

Maybe the real swimtervention was inside Haru’s heart all along 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

THEY WON AND HARU’S CRYING HE’S FINALLY LEARNING TO EXPRESS FEELINGS 1000/10 WOULD RECOMMEND

I knew Nitori would be captain but I’m still so happy for him!!! Baby!!!

“When you decide not to be done, I’ll be waiting” Rin has seen the most character growth of anyone on this show good for him!!

“Why you gotta say my name like that, it sounds weird” I keep telling you that is the sound of love, Harukaaaa <3

I LOVE EVERY PART OF THIS MONTAGE THE FLOWER PETALS THE “I’M IN COLLEGE NOW” GLASSES ON MAKOTO THE DREAMS COMING TRUE

WAIT ARE HARU AND MAKOTO GOING TO COLLEGE TOGETHER I LOVE IT

I SAID IT BEFORE BUT YOU WIN THIS TIME, SPORTS ANIME. YOU GOT ME. YOU GOT ME REAL GOOD.

#ayesha liveblogs free #liveblogging #long post #ayesha talks anime

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villainau · 6 years

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both aus / general

very soft hair when it’s not styled but you can’t touch it unless you’ve caught him when he’s sleepy and/or just waking up because you will be assassinated

his uncle’s surname is trumble so tbh valeska probably wasn’t lila’s real surname. she’d have changed it to sound more “exotic” in the circus. but let’s thank god for that and the fact that the twins are valeskas

doesn’t tend to lie because he’s more the “cruel honesty” type, but is a very good liar when he does - not as good as jeremiah because lying was always jeremiah’s forte, but jerome can easily put on an act or think up a story on the spot with enough detail to make it convincing

can easily go days without sleeping, and when he does fall asleep it’s only in his actual bed like 40% of the time

throws all of his red clothes in with jeremiah’s white clothes for washing constantly

swears so often. can easily say “fucking” twice in one sentence and throws one use of “shit” in there for good measure

no short sleeves outside ever. in private maybe, but not for long

his favourite colour is red, but he actually kinda likes pink too, especially hot pink

his first word was “miah”

villain au

lowkey hates being touched from behind e.g. pats on the back, a hand on his shoulder, etc, especially unexpectedly (and just hates the feeling of being snuck up on in general). he’ll stiffen like hell and the only people who can get away with it without him reflexively whacking their hands off of him are jeremiah and bruce, but they tend not to do it anyway because they can tell he doesn’t like it

absolutely had a super embarrassing doodle of a heart in his diary with “j + b” inside it, along with some v crude scribbles of things like him and bruce holding hands and them stabbing someone

Scary Kinks tbh. knives, pain (both others’ and his), blood, whatever, he has very little sense of limits. he is honestly not above even sticking a gun in your mouth if that’s what he’s feelin’. he’s only done that with bruce once, during the rebellious phase and the early days of the physical stuff, when he was still pushing limits and seeing how far bruce was really willing to go here and there weren’t a ton of Romo Feelings involved; he’d straddled bruce on a chair and he put the barrel of a pistol to bruce’s mouth, expecting nervousness or panic or some kind of reaction along those lines - but bruce just maintained steady eye contact and opened his mouth slightly, with no fear and watching him right back, which basically resulted in jerome thinking oh and yep, brucie’s something alright, grinning and throwing the gun off to the side to be ignored while they got on with Things. he wouldn’t do that with bruce anymore though - as dangerous as their lives generally are and as much as he loves that, he’s far less willing to go carelessly pointing loaded guns at bruce himself these days

does not like being tied up during NSFW Activities because he hates feeling confined/trapped and not being able to move his arms and not feeling in control because it’s too vulnerable, but bruce being tied up is Another Matter Entirely

lowkey praise kink. will either tell you to shut up or find Ways to distract you from talking if you actually try it, but is secretly kinda into it because he requires positive feedback in Most Things

identifies as bi but really couldn’t give a flying fuck about gender. if you’re fun and you can give him a good time, the rest is background noise

is annoyed when people are taller than him, so he avoids standing directly next to people who are too often (but on the other hand really likes standing next to shorter people because he likes to make it obvious that he Wins)

takes the fact that jonathan is the only person in the team taller than him as a personal threat. once idly mused to him about the possibility of sawing off his feet so he could be superior and just got a very deadpan try it. look and decided “…….maybe some other time”. it was probably a joke anyway. like 90%.

despite having a boyfriend who wears black almost exclusively, he pretty much never wears black himself. he’ll occasionally wear dark suits or one item of black clothing or whatever, but he always has something in his outfit with colour and tends to go for brightness over anything else

sends awful memes in the team group chat at 3am and no one thinks they’re funny except him and jervis. sometimes ivy does, and she occasionally sends a nice response even if she doesn’t just to be polite, but other times they are just Too Bad even for her

does also pm ivy Nice Things that remind him of her though, and these she does like. he also sends her random pictures of animals and flowers w captions like “is it just me or does this beanstalk kinda look like jonathan” and she can’t help giggling a lil at some of them and then feeling bad for it

master of the ironic “UWU” and “OWO” emojis and everyone else hates it

him and jervis are the only people jonathan actually responds to on the phone (other people can call him but he’ll just silently listen to what you have to say and then hang up, so it’s in the air whether he even heard you or not) and he finds it disproportionately funny that jonathan once answered the phone with “whomst.” instead of “hello”

he never self-harmed in the sense of cutting, but he also doesn’t have the same reservations about causing himself pain that others do, so he’s done things like put out cigarettes on his wrists/hands, test the sharpness of knives on himself, etc. and physical pain can be something of a release for him

generally fearless, but he was genuinely scared of his mother, uncle and the men his mother had over - killing lila and zach helped with a lot of this and made him feel like he’d won. he still gets a little on edge when someone reminds him of them in speech/appearance/personality, but he’s more likely to use it as an opportunity to prove to himself that he has power over the memory of lila/zach and that they can’t hurt him anymore by getting one over on the person in question too

in the very early stages of the abuse, he coped with it by believing that his mother loved him no matter what and clung to the hope that it would all stop one day and she’d sober up and love him properly. it sinking in that she didn’t love him at all and that it was never going to change was one of the things that ended up contributing to his eventual psychotic break

what is a stable self-esteem? jerome doesn’t know. can go from calling himself garbage to calling himself a god in .0002 seconds

tried to strangle an arkham therapist once because she brought up his childhood abuse and kept pushing him to talk about it and he just lost it. after that, all attempts at therapy for him were dropped

has an uncomfortable amount of knowledge about how to set broken bones and put in dislocated joints because there were times in the circus when things got really really bad and he should have gotten hospital treatment, but obviously nobody would have taken him, so he had to learn to do even the serious shit himself. early on, he came dangerously close to seriously fucking himself up and making his injuries worse more than once thanks to his amateur first attempts at fixing them

people in the circus were kinda-sorta aware of what went on with his mother, but basically just didn’t care; it wasn’t their business

touch-starved. one of the reasons he reacts so strongly the times when bruce is super gentle with him is because literally no one has ever just touched him softly before (and generally he isn’t used to being touched at all without pain immediately following) so at first it’s almost too much

generally isn’t affected by his facial scars and isn’t self-conscious about them at all, but is very used to other people finding them scary/unpleasant so was genuinely thrown off-balance the first time bruce traced them and called him beautiful

surprisingly, he can actually cook - he had to make his own food a lot in the circus when he was younger, it was either that or scrounge from the circus food stalls, bc lila sure as hell wasn’t making him meals - he just chooses not to anymore because, frankly, he can’t be bothered

he and bruce don’t really ever say “i love you” in so many words. they know what they have going on, so why would they need to verbalise it all the time when they already know it’s there? jerome’s really not into that kind of thing anyway, and honestly bruce isn’t the most emotionally open person either. bruce was the first of them to acknowledge and accept how he felt, and never denied it when asked by someone else, but he knows jerome and his background and thus never said it first in order to avoid pushing him into territory that may be uncomfortable for him. but the first time either of them said the words to the other, it came, surprisingly, from jerome, spur-of-the-moment - one of the nights he spends in the city with bruce alone, doing the dark shit they do. at one point, bruce slit a man’s throat in a particularly vicious way; jerome was at his shoulder, watching how he did it, and it came out without him really meaning it to: “god, i fucking love you.” bruce might not need to hear it, but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t feel good when he does - he made sure jerome had no chance of trying to play it off as a joke by turning around and promptly distracting him with a kiss. ...blood-covered and all.

has some experience with sleeping rough because sometimes lila would just kick him out because she didn’t want to see him that night, so he had to crash with someone else in the circus if they took pity on him or find somewhere else on the grounds/surrounding streets. he’d venture back a couple of days later when he knew she was out, and she’d come back and see he was there - she wouldn’t say anything and would basically just blank him, and that was the cue that he was safe to say

used to cry a lot and got called a crybaby by other kids in the circus when he was very young. over time, he taught himself to laugh whenever he felt like crying, and it got to the point where it was just an ingrained thing, so instead of breaking down and crying, he would get half-involuntary laughing fits instead. he got into a mindset of “everything is hilarious if you just think about it for long enough” as another coping method, because why should he be sad when everything in the world and everything that is happening to him is so damn funny?

doesn’t happen often, but very occasionally he sleep-talks and says some weird shit and bruce is just like “……..Alright.” he never remembers this in the morning

sleeping position varies depending on the time period. he’s either curled up on the very edge of the bed and taking up as little space as possible without falling off, or he’s sprawled out over the entire thing, and there’s no in-between. the ‘taking up no space’ thing is left over from childhood, but bruce notices this and the longer he’s with bruce and the more comfortable he gets with him (and the more it sinks in that, no, there will not be Consequences if he just lets himself relax - because he does a great job most of the time of not showing any vulnerability over his childhood, but when it comes to night-time and sleeping with someone else there, old habits and fears kick in a little at first), the more he just becomes The Most Fidgety Sleeper Ever. bruce gets smacked awake by his arm in his face a few times, but he has figured out a Solution - if he intertwines his fingers with jerome’s or shifts jerome’s arm down to his waist or something, jerome will just latch onto him in his sleep because warmth. no mentions of this in the morning allowed though, and he was definitely not cuddling, never call it that, he can’t control what he does when he’s asleep, BRUCE

still has nightmares sometimes - nights are when he’s at his most vulnerable basically, so bruce knows damn well that jerome letting him see that side of him is a gesture of trust

is lowkey intimidated by ecco because that girl picked his ass up when he was unconscious and dead weight, so she could absolutely pick him up while he’s fully awake, and that’s just too much strength for such a tiny woman. he will never admit this. tries to scare her instead because he has a reputation to uphold and is eternally annoyed about the fact that she doesn’t seem at all affected (but he’s convinced that she’s just hiding her fear really well)

high school au

climbs through bruce’s window a lot unnecessarily because he doesn’t want alfred to open the door. alfred usually finds out he’s there anyway, so he would be perfectly fine just going to bruce’s house the normal way, but he likes to pretend that he’s being sneaky and thus cool

watches a lot of stand-up comedy but is also the world’s worst critic and constantly makes comments about how he “could have made that joke better” or “there was a better way to word that”, which is what originally kickstarts the idea of going into comedy himself

………hm………. concept………. jerome w a pierced tongue………

watched twilight “ironically”. team edward if he had to choose, but thinks both edward and jacob are idiots and will get into an argument about this. will also legitimately debate about vampires vs werewolves. thinks that there should have been a big bloody fight at the end where everyone died, because if there is no violence/gore it’s a shit movie, this is a non-negotiable rule of his

has a fondness for gross/creepy creatures. he’s not at all scared of spiders and will kidnap the bigger ones in glasses and attempt to keep them until jeremiah (and later bruce) makes him put it outside. he’ll straight-up pick up a spider and let it run across his hands while other people scream about it

before bruce and elijah come along and before things start to change, he’s essentially living for jeremiah. if it weren’t for the fact that he has to look out for jeremiah and would never leave him in that environment alone and the fact that they promised each other they would always be there for each other no matter what, jerome’s lack of self-preservation would be a lot worse than it is bc without that to keep him tied to something he just wouldn’t care

when they were very little, the twins had a habit of sneaking into each other’s beds to sleep at night, usually after it had been a bad day with their mother and something had happened. they grew out of it when they got a little older, especially jerome once he stopped being so open with vulnerability/affection, but it was still a comfort that they slept near each other thanks to their caravan being too small for anything else so they knew the other was close-by. once jerome developed a habit of sneaking out at nights, this was also how jeremiah would often hear him leaving or would wake up and immediately notice he was gone

no one will play mario kart with him anymore because he gets ridiculously competitive and ruthless and he has no honour. he will shove you off of your seat so he can overtake you while you’re still getting up.

the only people who can tell him and jeremiah apart by voice alone are bruce and elijah. if anyone else calls their apartment, it’s just impossible to immediately work out who’s answered the phone at first unless they throw in a really obvious mannerism. if the person who picked up the phone is speaking with their mouth full and answered with “yo wassup”, it’s probably jerome. that or jeremiah’s finally broken.

speaking of phone calls, jerome is a nightmare when jeremiah is expecting a work call. if jerome gets to the phone first, it’s just: “is - is this mr. valeska?” “…you’re gonna have to be more specific, pal.” “…the j. valeska that i was supposed to call–?” “nope, pause, do better than that.” then the caller has to wait on the line while they hear “[muffled voice in the distance] JEROME, IS THAT THE CALL I SAID WAS IMPORTANT” “i dunno, maybe. i wasn’t really listening” “i SPECIFICALLY TOLD YOU NOT TO ANSWER THE PHONE IF IT RANG WHILE I WAS SHOWERING” and then vague sounds of clattering and voices before they get a flustered jeremiah on the line like “i am so sorry”

jerome is by far the messier twin, so his room is always a heap of dirty clothes and food packets and empty bottles/cans, but jeremiah can get really fixated on his work so his computer desk and his work-spaces are just full of papers and documents and empty coffee mugs. whenever he gets on at jerome about cleaning up after himself, jerome’s like [WILL SMITH POSE @ JEREMIAH’S DESK] WHAT ARE THOOOOOOSE

jerome and elijah have been to the hospital so many times because of the stupid shit they do that they’re basically on a first-name basis with a bunch of the doctors and nurses. whenever they come in, it’s like “oh, what have you boys done now?” (but really the nurses all love them bc they’ve charmed them and their stories about what happened this time are always hilarious)

bruce cooks sometimes and jerome “helps”, by which i mean he sits at the kitchen counter and just gossips to him, plays on his phone and/or watches him without actually lifting a finger to do anything - until he gets bored and things end up burning because bruce gets Distracted. eventually bruce enlists him to help chop vegetables and stir things because if he’s here, he can be useful, and jerome’s like “hmm what do i get in return?” so they develop a barter system where [x] activity gets jerome [x] amount of kisses and thus things actually get done while satisfying both of them without too much distraction. the only issue being that jerome keeps a) raising his prices and b) insisting on getting rewards for the most ridiculous shit now, like passing a bag of carrots over the counter because it’s just “SO MUCH UNPAID LABOUR, BRUCE”

still has moments where he reflexively flinches if someone significantly older/bigger/taller than him moves too quickly or suddenly, though people around his size/age or less are fine

is actually more self-conscious about his burnt hand than he lets on. he puts on a front like it doesn’t bother him, but the fact that he’s usually wearing fingerless gloves or has a bandage wrapped around it or has his sleeves pulled over his hands when he can’t have either of those says something. he actually managed to keep bruce and elijah from seeing it for quite a while, since that would have been harder to explain away than other things - they noticed he usually had his hands covered but didn’t think it was for a particular reason beyond it being a Jerome Quirk. one of the most notable things that happens in the future when things start to improve is that he stops wearing the gloves and eventually actually lets bruce hold that hand, whereas before if bruce tried he’d usually pull away and switch sides so bruce could hold the other

the others convinced him to see a therapist after he was officially diagnosed and unexpectedly he agreed (mostly to get everyone off his back), and he was assigned to a relatively young woman called bee. he didn’t expect it to accomplish anything and basically spent the first few sessions being an uncooperative shit and turning everything back on her and giving her smartass answers to her questions. it took a long while, but she eventually proved to be Cool and Funny enough for him to start warming up to her - which didn’t mean he was any more cooperative with the therapy side of things, but it did mean he started to use the phone number she gave him to text her about completely unrelated things in the vein of “holy shit bee you’re not gonna believe what miah just did”. she went along with it and their sessions morphed into jerome mostly giving her Gossip or them having casual conversations - but girl knew what she was doing. he gradually started to talk about bruce, jeremiah and elijah, about his relationship, about school, about the circus, and eventually opened up more about certain things that happened. he never quite got to the point of discussing his feelings about the abuse in-depth (though he did end up telling her a fair amount abt how he felt about bruce) but all in all therapy ended up having a positive effect on him, though bee was v talented at letting him think he wasn’t really giving her much info and that every realisation he came to during their sessions was down to him alone and not because he was talking things through with someone

likes hugs/cuddling/hand-holding much more than he will ever let on

never completely stops smoking, but he does tone it down after they all leave high school. he’ll smoke with other people and sometimes when he’s really bored or waiting for someone, but it’s not one of his first methods of passing the time anymore. trying to get him to stop drinking is a lost cause, though.

#t: original #ch: jerome valeska

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dorothyliker420 · 6 years

Text

huuhhoOh my GOD slrprfrsrfl(more lip licking noises)ooooh my GOd whoaoaohah. *huffing* a completeed chorus 2! HOLY SHIT oh my gohd

(silky made me this image as per request ily silky)

WELL HERE WE GO!!!!!!! A COMPLETED CHORUS CHAPTER 2!!!!!!!! CLOCKING IN AT 20,588 FUCKING WORDS AND 45 PAGES IN GOOGLE DOCS! lets see how many bs words I can add to that count am I right ladies

because of, I dont know, any italicization or bolding in the text itself was lost when I copy/pasted it to here so I guess the Experience isnt as Deep BUT ITS ALL GOOD ANYWAY because only I get to type in bold. thats how you know its me and not a rabble, but I also italicized lines that I really wanted to talk about

ill put all the Canon Real Text in an indent tho happy reading,

A Long Awaited Duet ---------------------------------***********************---------------------------------

The new canon is that in between those dashes is a really terrible swear word that the author censored with asterisks. only he knows it and he’ll unleash it when you criticize his fic

Pacing quickly around her room in a long, frustrated circle, Lisette’s worries were quickly drawing to a boiling point.

lisette’s circles make me long and frustrated am I right fellow dudes

Typically, she was a very easy-going person, the kind of girl who’d shrug off most concerns and instead focus on keeping a positive outlook. However, after spending her entire morning going through the motions, feeling trapped in a listless, uneasy funk, even she couldn’t help but be affected. It was almost noon already and still she couldn’t move her thoughts past yesterday’s tea party, to the look she’d seen weathered across Alto’s face.

Lisette is right to be threatened and uneasy. this is like the scene in the opening where the village is getting crystallized and its too late for rosa and shes like SAVE YOURSELF except instead its sexification

She hadn’t had the courage to say anything at the time, but it had haunted her thoughts ever since. Making it worse, when she’d attempted to find her mother to ask her for her advice, she hadn’t been able to find her anywhere, so she’d wound up simply spending the previous night with Marie.

the ghosts of the last chapter vaguely implying alto is too horney to sleep in the same bed as marie have returned and im frightened

“He’s… he’s still on edge, isn’t he?”

It wasn’t right. The fighting was over and peace had been won, but even when he should have been relaxing with his friends, Alto was still wearing the same guarded, strained expression. It was the same heart-breaking look she’d seen from her friend all throughout their battles, at all the times she’d stood at his die, watching him make the most difficult decisions of his life.

STOOD AT HIS DIE

She didn’t think any of the others had noticed. Perhaps she was the only one that would even be able to recognise the difference, after all, she was the only one who’d known him before all this. Back in Mithra he hadn’t been anything like that, he’d smiled freely and his gaze had was always carefree, to the point of being cheeky. Their entire lives had changed ever since she became a Witch and he followed to become her Knight… but she’d always hoped all this time that it could still return to how it was when everything was finally over.

“No,” she corrected herself, her body sagging with a deep sigh. There wasn’t any point lying to herself about this, “I’m not that naïve, I always knew it wouldn’t be that easy…”

“gee” said lisette out loud to herself with no one else around, “I am lisette from the video game stella glow. I am five foot four and my blood type is

Because, she knew Alto. And she knew, for him, that it had never been about the battles. He didn’t fear fighting, he would recklessly throw himself into danger without even a second’s thought if it meant he could help someone. As she’d told him so many times, his overwhelming compassion was both his best and worst trait. He was courageous to the point of stupidity, all he cared about was protecting the people important to him, keeping the people he loved safe and happy, as best he could. That was all the fighting had ever meant to him. And that was why she’d always known it couldn’t possibly be that easy for him.

im giving this alto analysis a 2 alto is a liberal degenerate who really loves hunting and also u dont know anything about him jl “AWOOOGAA” davenport if u tell me about him again ill kill you

Crying out in annoyance, Lisette slumped across the room and threw herself onto her bed, sinking deep into the large, soft mattress as if to try let it absorb a fraction of her worries.

I cannot shake the feeling he was thinkin bout her tiddies when he wrote this

‘Alto’s still fighting, even now,’ she knew that. It was a truth she’d struggled to deal with for days now, ‘The war isn’t over for him yet, because he’s still pushing himself to try find a way to keep every one of us happy.’

fuckin dumb ass horny ass bitch. mediocre ass, pathetic ass, money grubbing, fucking stupid bitch ass you dont put apostrophes around thoughts its ugly as shit

It was a painful thought, the elephant in the room and something she hated thinking about. But somehow, not thinking about it, pretending to simply ignore had become even worse.

does lisette know what an elephant is. does that expression exist. this is third person limited so its kind of weird to use that kind of anachronism

After all, if Alto was still fighting, then she wanted to fight alongside him! She was his family, his comrade, his first Witch and even his (prospective) girlfriend,

I had to cut this off because it was next level dumbshit literally anyone is his prospective girlfriend with that state of their relationship. im his prospective girlfriend

there wasn’t a single part of her that wanted to do anything less than to support him with all her might. He was a part of her soul. He was the man she loved and someone who she would never allow herself to be separated from, she’d known those feelings for absolute certainty ever since the moment she’d woken up from death’s door and travelled around the world to stand at his side. Just thinking about him wracking himself with worries and her not helping him was terrifying!

2. that last sentence is the worst written thing in, if not human existence, then the century

And, she spared a glance over at the mirror she’d been avoiding looking at all day, even aside from that, could she really say she was any different? Was she truly able to smile like before, only because their fighting was over?

hackles raised at the prospect of mirror kink

Lisette gave a dry laugh, reaching out and squeezing the small stuffed pig Popo had given her, pressing it against her considerable chest.

1. the pig is kinda cute like maybe but who tf is vending these smutfic items. who is crawling around in the back alleys selling cursed objects that make people horny as fuck. did ewan make a deal with the devil to sell all his twilight-zone-monkey-paw shit from his brief sponsorship with baddragon

2. die

3. lisette’s chest is CONSIDERABLE all right. it makes me CONSIDER ending it all

For all their outward appearances, in this, at least, she doubted it was any different from any of the others, no doubt that was why everything had seemed so off lately, “We’re all just stuck in limbo, aren’t we?”

this is the longest string of indirect pronouns ever like whomst??? and what an eerie sentence to end a section on. though u kno what stay in limbo

---------------------------------***********************---------------------------------

those dashes are containing the massive power of the cuss word. if even one of them falters or breaks formation the sheer obscenity would vaporize us all

Unfortunately for Lisette, her self-examination came with no easy answers or steps forward. Even though she’d accepted that being stuck in place as they were was only making things worse for all of them and particularly for Alto, there was no obvious solution she could latch onto, to change things.

this literally picks up? exactly where the previous section ended? like. with information that flows from the previous paragraph. if youre going to make that fucking big then why is it functionally useless

However, now more than ever, she was a determined woman and slowly -as the time passed and the morning faded away into early afternoon- slowly, her resolve held out and she was able to fearlessly consider even the truths she’d previously tried so hard to avoid.

why is this the ugliest formatting ive ever seen have you ever heard of an em dash or, a comma. also im losing shit at Determination Resolve Holding Out Shes Never Done This wasnt this like the sole bad point of her tunings

She knew she loved Alto, that he was the only man who’d ever made her feel complete

But, she also knew that the other Witches felt just the same, she forced herself to accept the fact that he was just as important to them as he was to her.

ok nvm im not done being pissed at The Only Man like yeah lisette its called comphet im rewriting this so that lisette realizes shes a lesbian and also that whole Complete Her thing is all of whats wrong with lisettes arc like all of it this is what men do

It was something they’d all consciously avoided discussing, something that none of them seemed to know how to deal with. Her companions, the other Witches, were all as close as family to her, she loved them all dearly… And yet, they were all competing, in their own way, for the same man.

alto is three years old

She was sure they must feel just as awkward about that as her, there was a reason why even the ever impulsive Popo or the harsh-blunt Sakuya

tell u whats harshing my blunt........this fic ((takes a weed puff

had never said anything and why, no matter how much they talked and how much they shared, this single topic was never once addressed directly, they’d all been working on the same process as her- that it was too strange a situation and too difficult a conversation to deal with, that the best thing to do was simply wait till after the war when Alto would be able to reciprocate their feelings, and then there the problem would solve itself. Well… The war was over. And they were all still tiptoeing around each other’s hearts, all waiting for the same response from the same man. “We must all seem so silly.”

tf were they supposed to do to address it? like lets just accept the gross situation but was they supposed to so call everyone to a room lisette spins around in a big chair and says We’re Here To Discuss The Het or maybe this happens

She could just imagine how ridiculous this situation must appear from the outside; five best friends all in love with the same man, all waiting for him to respond to their feelings and all marooned in the same silent stand-off, walking on eggshells while pretending everything was fine. No doubt her mother found it hilarious.

thats the worst line ive ever seen in my life. oedipus rex has nothing on this bitch

that aside like accepting them all as comphets for the moment. literally never interacted on a regular basis with another boy their age. except hilda I guess but it doesnt matter this is so dumb! yall is a bunch of trauma victims you cant just jump directly into the boinking

“Grrr! This is all your fault Alto! Stupid! Since when did you get so popular anyway!? You weren’t like that in Mithra! You’re just… you’re just too dependable… You mean so much to all of us, we can’t help but love you…”

deadass u told me this was dialogue from the anime where the tiddies bounced when the girl blinked? id believe it

He was their conductor. They all loved him. They all wanted to be with him. They were all waiting for him to favour only them…

dont like how its treated that its an absolute that witches will just fall for their conductor thats like sayin no one is safe around bi ppl. reach perhaps but its the same dumbass ideas

Perhaps that was the worst part of all. The more she thought about it, the more she was starting to realise just what an impossible situation their feelings and expectations had put Alto into. She knew better than anyone just how much he cared for each of them, she’d healed the scars on his body time and again that showed just how far he’d go to protect any of them… And yet, without ever really thinking how, they were all still asking him to then choose between them, to decide which of his Witches he loved the most.

but also I just had the revelation that author does not know what romantic love is like, at all, and the smoke cleared I am enlightened and theres nothing I dont understand

And, she couldn’t help him at all, could barely even support him in what must be an incredibly painful choice for him. All she could do was leave it to him, and trust that when he did choose, that he felt the same way about her as she did about him and they would finally be together. As for the rest… She didn’t know… The thought of him choosing one of the others over her was almost too painful, to terrifying to consider, but the knowledge that her friends would have to go through that was no less terrible…

tired of u demonizing r*mantic love. fuck its th most exhilarating experience of my life. that and having a baby shark sit in my hands. dont give all these Oh No People Get Hurt to justify just fuckin whoever u want

That was the mire they were all stuck in. That was why Alto was still looking so stressed and why none of them had been able to move forwards. There wasn’t anything any of them could do and there was no way to make everyone happy. She frowned bitterly. ‘…Would… Would it even make us happy?’

me, who had never been as happy as I am prior to being in love: hell yeah bitch dis go hard as hell flocka

It was a strange thing to consider, something she’d never once thought before this very moment- she’d thought for so long she was waiting for Alto to return her feelings, she’d wanted so long to be with him and to be together forever. But, would she really be happy like that? Could she truly be happy being with the man she loved at the expense of watching the companions she held dear, the friends she’d bled and cried together with, becoming heartbroken? Mordi, Popo, Sakuya, and especially Hilda, after all they’d been through, after how important she knew Alto was to each of them… Her heart clenched in her chest just imagining it!

if this is a question then ur not in romantic love idiot! shut up

But… That was how it had to be, wasn’t it? They’d all been foolish enough to fall for the same man, there was only one Alto. No.

dumps the big ass mess of gl***ng pr**e poly edits here but im not saving it to my computer so u gotta imagine it

Lisette propped herself up on the bed, a previously unfathomable conclusion quickly becoming clear to her. No. She couldn’t accept that. And Alto surely wouldn’t accept that. He’d never accepted that they couldn’t stop the Eclipse. He hadn’t accepted that they couldn’t fight against God. And, at the end of everything, he’d refused to accept that Mother Qualia had to be their enemy. A solution that put the entire burden on Alto and led to all her friends being heartbroken? How could she ever accept that!? How could she ever have thought something like that would make her happy!? That wasn’t how they worked! They were the Tuning Knights, humans that had defeated God and saved Marie! They would never accept such a lukewarm compromise.

fucking................mormons..................................

‘Well now,’ she laughed, ‘If I really think about it, the solution is pretty obvious, isn’t it?’ It was reckless and crazy, nothing at all like anything she’d ever imagined herself doing… But then, didn’t that just make it the same as everything else they’d done?

this isnt even how polyamory works!!!!!!!! sorry im not being funny I just really value r*mant*c love and listen NO ONE would just sit down and think “yes clearly the healthiest thing for the person my heart is devoted to is to juggle 6 relationships”

“Yup! I’m not gonna accept anything like that!” ultimately, all that mattered was the same conclusion she’d come to, ever since she’d returned to life. She already knew what she wanted, she just had to make it happen, “Alto, I’m by your side. Always. I’ll support you!”

hi im lisette and this is my boyfriend alto! we’re queering heterosexuality by having him fuck a ton of girls at once! swipe right if you want to hop on that dick. no gays allowed

---------------------------------***********************---------------------------------

me: this is bad content

jldavenport: h*mg*n*n*l*b*ng*s*gl*m

me: vaporized in silhouette against the wall from the sheer power

Finishing off a long day of meetings, reports and training, clad in his usual attire (sans the armour,

oh shit its sans thearmour!!!! gonna have a bad time that being said makes sense that hes european the gross fuck

thankfully for him) and returning from the dormitory baths with a relieved sigh, Alto scarcely had time to close the door to his room behind him before he was suddenly jolted from his thoughts by an excited knocking. “Eh? Lisette?”

the phrase “dormitory baths” pisses me the fuck off where do you get off jldavenport. probably all over your keyboard but stop saying shit like that this isnt your canon bitch

A late-night visit from his orange haired friend wasn’t especially unusual, but to see her standing around in her Witches outfit

epithets, especially those that refer to hair color, are awful and amateurish but because he still doesnt know this apparently: Redhead. Is. A. Fucking. Word.

in her Witches outfit

that wasnt good enough to warrant that large of an image but like that movie fucked me up so bad lets see what scars me worse the mouse scene or this fic

at this time of night certainly was. And even stranger than that, she was wearing the original outfit, the one she’d worn since the first time she’d awakened to her powers in Mithra, rather than the more dazzling Goddess robes she’d gained after he’d finally tuned her heart, ‘I suppose it’s probably easier to sit around in this one?’ If he had to wear something as flashy as any of the dresses the girls wore, he was sure he’d spent half his time worrying about ripping it.

honestly content notwithstanding this reads like an instructional on what NOT to do when writing. you write like this? dont. its very entry level like I cant say that I necessarily write better but do what I say not what I do

throwing the goddess thing out there is like him saying LOOK!!!! A FACT i KNOW ABOUT THE ACTUAL CANON!!!!!! HAHA

Despite standing staring at him from the hallway, with her face flushed and eyes not quite meeting his, she still hadn’t said anything, “Er, Lisette? Is something wrong?”

knocking on someones door and forgetting why ur there is a neurodivergent feel lisette has adhd now and theres nothing you can do about it

“Ah!” she jumped before finally shaking herself off and responding with a slight anxiousness, anxiety. see me after class “No, no not really. I just… I’ve had a lot of mind and I thought it’d be better if we could talk a bit? Do… Do you mind if we spend the night together, again?”

lisette u were literally talking to urself five minutes ago abt havin him fuck everyone and now ur all anime blushus. bitch

He swallowed, his mouth suddenly dry. She wanted to share his bed again? Spend the night holding hands like back then? Stopping himself short of giving her an answer, Alto suddenly realised just how imploringly she was looking up at him.

they literally used this exact Mouth Suddenly Dry thing last chapter do ppl who enjoy this fic actually like that r smthn. they get wet 4 the dry

“Huh, it’s not like you to actually ask…” He teased softly. Usually Lisette was far more insistent about this sort of thing, he’d normally expect her to simply march into his room and seat herself on his bed. He only realised as she spoke that for her to act like this, for whatever reason she was acting like this, it must be important to her that he did accept her request

ugly sentence. ugly, ugly sentence. ew. im actually so bored by this sentence im ceasing work on this for the night good bye

She didn’t want to force it on him. Still… He couldn’t help but hesitate. It was stupid, he knew, but he’d felt awkward spending time alone with any of the girls since after the war, lest any of them get the wrong idea.

“get the wrong idea” DONT FUCKING WRITE ALTO LIKE THIS I AM IMMORTAL MY SKIN IS ADAMANTINE YOU SHALL FALL BEFORE ME

A moment passed and still Lisette didn’t say anything; clenching her hands nervously below her wait -and unintentionally pushing her impressive bust out even further towards him-

the commissioner, apparently upon seeing stella glow:

she silently awaited his response. Blushing a little under her low gaze, Alto realised it was getting harder and harder to remember the days when he’d seen her just like a sister.

this proves its inhuman and disgusting because it gave me visceral flashbacks to fire emblem fates so lemme post some of my fave incest quotes from that, starting with the ones it made me astral project into

did that last one haunt u because for a split second you imagined a world where lisette said them? good bc that shit keeps me up at night. im tired of cropping these quotes out so like we’re done my point has been made

In the end though, he couldn’t possibly deny her. Not for no reason, and not when she looked at him like that, “Yeah, of course Lisette. That sounds fun.”

the begging thing from the last chapter hit me full force in memory and I honestly hope it comes back bc ive got a dynamite joke locked and loaded

Breaking out into a bright smile, the Water Witch sagged in relief, taking him by surprise as she reached out to take his hand in hers, letting her body fall soft and warm against him as she did so. Her breath tickled hot across his collar and Alto’s heart jumped in shock!

DONT EVER USE EXCLAMATION POINTS LIKE THIS im serious. it is about as ugly, 2007-fanfic-net-core you can get.

Her hands felt smooth and gentle, wrapped warm around his…

HIS WHAT

he’d felt that before, it was pleasant, although not anything new. But feeling her head falling lovingly to his shoulder like this and having her entire body now laying against his… His mouth went dry,

Wet 4 The Dry Confirmed

he could even feel her breasts pushing large and heavy against his own chest! ‘Woah… S-So soft… They’re even bigger than Rosa’s, aren’t they?’

can you believe this was written completely unironically? like, people find this hot? if it didnt deplete the experience of reading this fic id replace every line referencing boobs with a comment from nicki minaj’s instagram

For just a split second, no matter how much of a gentleman he was, standing there like that, it was impossible for him not to compare the mother and daughter.

WHAT DID YOU DO TO MY SON

“Li-Lisette?” he choked out, desperately reigning in his thoughts before they rampaged down a dangerous direction. “Mmm, Alto, hehe, I’m glad,” she giggled happily, skipping back and beaming up at him as she tugged on his hands, leading him off, “Even just being like this with you, I feel better already!”

ok I have NO idea what movement theyre doing. shes like, skipping and then she comes back and takes his hands and idk probably his dick or something

Absolutely caught up in her rhythm, they were halfway down the hall before Alto finally realised she’d pulled him completely out of his room!

heres a coded message just for katt: e*****t w** d****** **m!the narration means he was aware she was pulling him so like where the fuck did he think he was going if not outside his room

“Uh, h-hey, Lisette? We’re going somewhere? I thought you wanted to go to sleep?” “That’s right,” she nodded simply, giving up and tugging him and instead falling into step beside him, “But your bed’s too small for it to be comfortable, so we’re gonna use my room instead!” Alto almost dug his heels in from sheer indignation!

im sorry. im sorry I had to cut this up but come on. come the fuck on. indignation. like she made a point and alto is all “insolent female requesting things of me” have you not met alto. authot is from r/incels

She’d come all this way to see him, just to drag him back to her room!? How self-indulgent could she be!? And, it wasn’t as if his bed back in Mithra had been any larger and she’d never complained before. Eventually, he just sighed and followed her lead, it wasn’t worth getting worked up over. If it would make her happier, then that was fine. It might be nice to spend a night in someone else’s room for a change too.

Walking hand in hand through the halls like this was fairly embarrassing, thankfully it seemed that it was late enough that no-one else was around. He really, really didn’t want to suddenly run into Rusty like this, let alone Giselle, or Sakuya… Supressing a shudder, Alto hurried on.

“let alone giselle” wh???? I am so baffled by this. obviously rusty or sakuya would give him shit but whats giselle gonna do??? is alto being bullied by a robot?????? I want giselle to appear and smash alto’s frosting into the ground

“I won’t hesitate, bitch,” said Giselle, pointing her laser at altos dick and shattering it into one million individual pieces

Unlike the tiny spare room he’d been assigned so long ago now, Lisette, as a Witch, had been housed in the premium quarters on the other side of their dormitory.

stop. stop saying dormitory. this is not a college

Luckily in this case, unlike the Palace, the building wasn’t overly large so it was only a short trip to her room. They arrived a few minutes later, just as his heart was beginning to settle down.

…

what happened to the long ass aterisks break. oh god the swear word is coming isnt it

Unfortunately, the moment Lisette opened the door and they stepped inside, Alto’s breath was one again caught violently in his throat, “H-Hilda!?” And indeed, kneeling serenely atop a small cushion in the middle of the large room, the Time Witch was sipping calmly from her usual green ceramic tea-cup, as if there was nothing strange about her presence here at all.

I dont like how shes sitting on a pillow in the center of the room that sounds ritualisitic

(bangs pink cup on the ground) She Sits On The Sacrificial Fuck Pillow ((group of hooded figures behind me start chanting “Fuck Pillow! Fuck Pillow!”

Watching as she settled the drink aside, perfectly in synch with the sound of Lisette locking the door behind her, Alto’s mouth went dry.

theres so much wrong with the syntax and shit but im pushing that all aside to say how fucking difficult it is to sync sound like that even on purpose so yeah theyre def doing a cult sacrifice to the original sex god, elcrest

A moment of silence reigned and somewhere in the back of his currently panicking mind, the bewildered Conductor couldn’t help but notice that Hilda too was wearing her standard Witches’ outfit, the same form fitting black dress

“dress” very generous for mr boob grower

and wide sweeping hat she’d become associated with for so many years. However, in her case, this wasn’t much of a surprise. As far as he’d seen from the White-Haired woman, she didn’t seem to actually own any normal, casual attire and, while he knew she deeply adored he beautiful white dress she’d unlocked when he’d purified her lonely heart, he also knew that even she couldn’t help but feel rather self-conscious, wearing something that was practically a wedding dress as an everyday outfit, he hadn’t seen Hilda’s Goddess Robes since the end of the final battle.

I literally cannot read any part of this paragraph except the capitalization of White-Haired and Goddess Robes this was either written in the 1700s or modern day by me dissociating in a target bathroom this is so funny if the fic gets any funnier ill die

“Alto? I’m surprised. Isn’t it a bit late for you to be visiting a woman’s bedroom?”

horny dont got business hours babe

“Ah, H-Hilda! It’s, it’s not what you’re thinking, I, Lisette!? Wha-” “Relax Alto,” the Water Witch giggled softly as she stepped forward, taking his hand again, but this time wrapping herself around his arm, “She’s just teasing you.” “Wha… Abuh?”

this is harem anime/fire emblem dialogue right down to the “Abuh?” actually thats the defining thing you hear someone say that youre in a straight anime and you need to run for your fucking life

“My apologies,” Hilda nodded, offering him a small smile in recompense as she matched Lisette’s movements, taking hold of his other hand, her pale face burning bright red as her soft fingers entwined with his, “I just, got a little flustered seeing you so suddenly… I… I wasn’t sure what to say.”

ok first of all you cannot write hilda in any realm of possibility but also like this is yet another thing to not trust men for: emphasizing the whiteness of a womans skin. he is a racist, plain and simple

Her hand squeezed nervously around his and Alto realised just how easily he could feel her racing heart through the light fabric of her dress when she pulled his arm against herself. Not that Lisette was any different, he couldn’t possibly believe in the confidant front she was showing after knowing her as long as he had, not when he could feel her entire body trembling against him.

hilda is like two ft tall howd she even reach his arm. also like there isnt even any fabric boy u raw touchin her

His mouth opened and closed, but he couldn’t think what to say, he wasn’t mentally prepared for any of this! He’d gone from expecting to go to sleep, to being visited by Lisette, to being dragged through the halls, and now he was being sprung with some surprise meeting!? And both of them were clinging to him like never before!

this is in character alto not wanting to have a threesome so he can go nap

He couldn’t possibly keep up. Before he even realised it, he’d been pulled all the way over to Lisette’s bed and was sitting with a girl wrapped around either of his arms.

what a problem! what a terrible day for him! what are the odds of this happening!

“What… What’s going on?” “Something good.” Hilda answered in her own cryptic fashion, her voice almost breathless and her blazing red cheeks half hidden behind his cloak as she shyly slid in right next to him.

it is most certainly not good ma’am

“That’s right,” Lisette agreed, happily snuggling up against him as she squeezed herself around his other arm, “We’re gonna help you come to a decision!”

we’re gonna make u C*M...............to a decision ;)

Alto blinked, “Eh?”

petition for this to turn out like the friends episode where ross got kicked out of a threesome with his wife and another woman bc they were lesbians so he left and made a sandwich

conveniently the fic decides to break here anyway so thats all you get for now. I’ll finish the other parts later (im expecting like maybe five because of the gargantuan size of this travesty) and link them direct from here

Part 2 here! (coming soon)

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