askin for devil all the time fic whatever you wanna write iโm leavin it up to you
Okay, so this took so long because I got carried away, but I LOVED writing this and I truly hope you enjoy it!! Once again, I love you and would do anything you ask of me, so please never feel bad about asking me to write anything!!! ENJOY and Happy Halloween!!
P.S. @imawreck1999, if you want to do a reading of this, Iโll make popcorn this time.
Word Count: 12,820
Warnings: SMUT (18+) (No Age Gap between reader and Arvin), Murder, Violence, Underage Drinking, Running Away, Family Arguing, Gambling, Just lots of not good things...Read At Your Own Risk and Responsiblyย
**
ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย Iโll Follow You Into The Dark
โSame fill up as usual?โ Arvin asks as you pull up to the gas station where he works.
โI suppose so,โ you smile as you roll down your window. โYou know, my Pa is sore at you.โ
โSore at me? For what?โ he asks, pushing the pump nozzle into your gas tank. โI worked off my debt, didnโt I?โ
โYou worked off your debt, but you stopped cominโ around.โ
โWhat else is there for me to come around for?โ
โI donโt know, probably thought youโd man up and ask me out,โ you say with a wry smile.
โI did man up and ask you out,โ he chuckles, removing the nozzle once the machine โtingsโ.
โI know that- but he doesnโt.โ
โYou ready for your parents to know?โ
โNot really. But you could still come around.โ
โCome around and do what?โ
โI donโt know, maybe fix a chifferobe or two? Fix up the sink in the kitchen?โ
โYou know I have to pickup Lenora after school.โ
โWho told you not to? Hell, bring her with you.โ
โYeah? Then what happens after I run out of things to fix?โ he smirks, leaning against the drivers side door.
โMaybe make an honest woman out of me, and ask me out on a real date? In front of my parents.โ
โMaybe-โ
โBy maybe, I mean do it.โ
โYouโll be ready for that?โ
โReady for my Mama and all of her hollerinโ about a weddinโ date and havinโ babies? Never,โ you laugh softly, โbut Iโm ready to be with you. Really be with you. Besides, as handy as you are, you canโt be that fast at fixinโ things.โ
โWell, now I have a bit more of a push to work faster,โ he laughs before dipping down and kissing you. โI love you, Y/N.โ
โI love you too, Arvin,โ you sigh, always wanting more of him but never asking as Sheriff Lee Bodecker pulls up behind you, obnoxiously honking his horn. โWhat a prick. Hey, what are you doinโ tonight?โ
โGoinโ home and helpinโ my grandmother with last minute prep for some Spring thing theyโre havinโ at church this weekend.โ
โWell, do you think sheโd protest to you staying out a little later tonight?โ
โWhat do you have in mind?โ
โThereโs gonna be a little get together at Timโs,โ you sigh as the Sheriff honks his horn again. You lean out the open window, turn around, and give him the finger. Sheriff or not, he can still kiss both sides of your ass.
โY/N, donโt-โ he sheepishly protests.
โI havenโt done anythinโ besides bruise his ego, donโt worry about him. What do you say? Come tonight-โ
โLenora-โ
โItโll only be for a few hours, sheโll be fine. I miss you.โ
โI miss you too,โ he smiles as the sheriff honks his horn again. โIโll meet you there-โ
โMy parents have dinner plans with a friend, pick me up.โ
โFine, Iโll pick you up,โ he laughs before kissing your forehead. โGo before you get yourself in real trouble.โ
โTell me what I wanna hear or Iโll stay right here.โ
โYouโre a real trouble maker, you know that? I love you.โ
โAnd I love you, Arvin,โ you smile before turning over the engine and its pistons fire. โIโll see you tonight, and you better not stand me up,โ you warn, sounding as foreboding as possible.
โAs if I ever could,โ he calls back as you pull away.
As you slowly wind onto the familiar roads back home, car full of gas and back seat full of groceries, you smile to yourself at the ideas you hope come true tonight.
**
You sit at the kitchen in Timโs house, looking around the room, holding your beer close. Arvin called and told you that he wouldnโt be able to pick you up because there was something going on with Lenora, his grandmother, and uncle, but that heโd meet you. He promised heโd meet you.
Well, youโve been at Timโs now for 2 hours and thereโs still no sign of him. Youโre irritation grows by the second; the night wasnโt going at all as you had planned, and you were growing more and more uncomfortable as more guys hit on you. Yeah, youโre only three beers in, but that doesnโt stop the steadying uneasiness in your stomach.
All of that and Devin wonโt stop performing Johnny Cash songs on his acoustic guitar. The way he was performing, youโd think that The Man in Black invented country music itself.
โNow maโam,โ a guy who canโt be that much older than you smiles as he approaches,โIโve been watching you sit alone here all night. You get stood up or somethinโ?โ
โNo,โ you smile sweetly, โmy boyfriend is on his way. Heโs just finishinโ up some work at home.โ
โIโd make you a priority over any work I have.โ
โWell, thatโs very sweet of you, but heโll be here soon.โ
โYou sure you donโt wanna make him jealous with a little dance?โ
โNo, I donโt think that would turn out great for anyone,โ you smile as you start shifting uncomfortably. โArvin and his temper are nothing to toy with, itโs best not to test those watersโ you think to yourself.
โWhatโs the danger in one dance?โ he eggs on, moving closer to you.
โI believe the lady said no,โ Arvin interjects, hand on the guyโs shoulder as he forces his attention onto him and away from you. You quickly stand up as the anger on his face is very apparent. โOr did you not understand?โ
โYouโre the one who ditched her, pal. Donโt get mad at me because-โ
โLetโs not do this tonight,โ you interrupt, standing between Arvinโs temper and its target as well as the two men. โI said no, youโre here now, and thatโs that. Letโs all just go our own separate ways,โ you smile sweetly.
โYouโll be sorry,โ the guy scoffs before stalking off.
โHey...hey,โ you call to Arvin as his angry gaze follows the guy โrelax. Everythinโ is fine-โ
โHe been hasslinโ you all night?โ he asks flatly.
โNo, he just-โ
โWhy would you wear that?โ he asks, finally looking at your outfit.
โI donโt know, maybe โcause I thought you would like it,โ you snap back, feeling irritated and stupid at the same time, wishing you hadnโt thrown your jacket in Timโs bedroom. โAre you just gonna be an ass the whole night, or are you gonna tell me whatโs wrong?โ
โIโm sorry,โ he sighs, picking up your beer and taking a swig โitโs nothinโ youโve done. You look great and I love you....Lenora is acting strange and we canโt figure out what the hell to do.โ
โStrange how?โ
โSheโs closed off and sheโs been sick a lot. Shes been spending more time with that preacher everyoneโs so riled up about and now she just seems...something is wrong.โ
โWell did you-โ
โIโm sorry, can we go somewhere else?โ he asks, a scowl on his face. โIf I hear one more Johnny Cash song, Iโm going to punch myself in the face.โ
โLet me grab my jacket and we can go.โ
โFuck, your car! Iโm so sorry-โ
โIโll drive back to my parents house and we can just drive around. Maybe go to Lindaโs. She never closes that damn diner.โ
โIโm sorry.โ
โStop apologizinโ. Let me get my jacket and we can go,โ you smile at him.
You quickly grab your jacket and tell your few friends goodnight as Arvin practically drags you out of the house. When you get in your car and start it while waiting for Arvin, you canโt help but laugh when โJacksonโ starts playing on the radio. Death, taxes, Jonny Cash: some things are inescapable.
The drive back to your house is quick and easy. Your parents are surprisingly still out at their dinner party, so you quickly run into your house and drop off your keys. You write them a quick note, leaving it on the kitchen table. The note tells them youโll be spending the night at Sarahโs because they donโt always need to know whole truths. You quickly slip out the front door and hop up into Arvinโs pickup.
โYou sure Iโm not gettinโ you into trouble?โ he asks as he pulls off quickly.
โNo one is home, baby,โ you laugh, โI left them a note saying Iโm staying over at Sarahโs.โ
โYou told Sarah?โ
โWhy wouldnโt I?โ
โWhy would you?โ
โArvin, what is goinโ on with you?โ
โNothinโ,โ he sighs, gripping the steering wheel tighter as he starts to drive faster.
โDonโt do that. Donโt shut me out.โ
โIt would just be nice to see you and not be angry about somethinโ.โ
โOkay, but you are angry about somethinโ right now and Iโd rather know then not. Whatโs going on?โ
โYou trust preachers?โ he asks, quickly glancing at you before returning his gaze back to the road.
โArenโt we supposed to?โ
โYou know what I mean,โ he huffs before turning into the parking lot of the local liquor store. โIโll be right back.โ
โArvin-โ
โItโll only take a minute, baby,โ he sighs before getting out, hustling his way inside.
You sigh and sit back. Your mind racing as you try and figure out just what the hell is going on. You groan in frustration when you look to your left and see Sheriff Bodecker pulling up beside you. You look up to God and ask him what you did to deserve a day like this as the dirt in the parking lot kicks up into your vision.
โYou know, underage drinking is a chargeable offense,โ he muses aloud as he gets out of his cop car.
โLucky for me, Iโm not drinking. As if you care,โ
โIt is my job.โ
โIt didnโt seem like you cared about your job two months ago when you told me I can fuck you to keep my Daddyโs business open,โ you crack back, eyes squinting as your glare sharpens.
โHe still has $600 left to pay,โ he smirks, inching closer to Arvinโs truck.
โWell, lets hope he comes up with it.โ
โYou know, a lot of women would be-โ
โIs everythinโ okay here?โ Arvin asks as he pulls the truck door open. โSheriff, anythinโ wrong?โ
โJust letting your lovely passenger know that her Daddy should come and see me when he gets the chance,โ he smiles sweetly, patting the door two times before noticing at the bag of booze in his hand. โThat for you, boy?โ
โMy Uncle asked me to pick it up on my way back,โ Arvin lied coolly as you smile to yourself.
โSure he did. You two have fun tonight, stay safe.โ
โWill do,โ Arvin fake smiles before starting his truck, pulling away, and driving off.
โI swear to God, I could slit his throat,โ you mumble, digging into the bag of booze Arvin bought in and grabbing a beer. โPiece of shit.โ
โWhat the hell happened back there?โ
โNothinโ to worry about,โ you huff, taking a swig of your drink.
โNo, if I donโt get to shut you out, you donโt get to shut me out.โ
โArvin-โ
โWhatโs going on, Y/N?โ
โYou know my Daddy has a gambling problem.โ
โLose too much at Madame Duffyโs again?โ
โWell yeah, but this time he lost too much to Sheriff Bodecker.โ
โThat must be a bitch.โ
โIt wasnโt too bad, weโve been makinโ good money at the meat shop lately, but Bodecker doesnโt feel like heโs getting paid back quick enough,โ you sigh, finishing off your beer before grabbing another.
โWhat does that mean?โ Arvin growls as he grips the steering wheel tighter, knuckles whitening.
โHe propositioned me,โ you laugh humorlessly. โIf I fuck him, I can get rid of my Daddyโs debt..โ
His face tenses up like he swallowed some bad milk. โHe said what?!โ Arvin questions, braking screaming as they the truck screeches to a swerving stop.
โI donโt want to think about it, Arvin. I-โ
โI swear to God Iโll kill him.โ
โBaby, Iโm having a good time with you. I donโt want to think about anything else. I just want us to focus on each other and right now,โ you smile as Hank Williams starts to play on the radio. โLetโs just be happy, okay? Tomorrow and all of its bullshit can worry about itself.โ
โI love you, you know that?โ
โI think I do,โ you giggle as you settle back into your seat and take a sip of your beer.
You met Arvin your first year of High School. He didnโt much like people, and people didnโt think highly of him either. Kids were cruel and would constantly poke fun at his upbringing: how his daddy was a deranged war vet who killed himself, and how his Mamaโs cancer was the result of a punishment from God for his father almost killing two men one morning for reasons unknown. He was often in a lot of fights, and you had been told by your parents on more than one occasion to stay away from him.
โBoys like that only bring trouble and thatโs nothing you need to get messed up in,โ your Mama would say as she dropped you off at school.
You always found it funny that she had that mentality considering that her husband, your Daddy, is the biggest gambler in the county and, for a while, its biggest womanizer. However, you always bit your tongue and minded your manners. You knew she meant well so it was best for you to just keep your mouth shut and nod in agreement.
However, as time went on, your eyes always found themselves searching for him in class, and you found it harder and harder to heed your parents warning. His eyes always looked so tired and sad. He had soft facial features, but you could tell he was good with his hands just by looking at them. They always looked worn and calloused. He always made sure to use โsirโ and โmaโamโ when addressing your parents whenever he went to your Daddyโs meat shop to pick up food. You watched how he protected and looked out for Lenora, and it really got you thinking, โhe canโt be all that bad if he can love that much.โ
During your Junior year, you finally found a reason to talk to him.
โYour Uncle good with cars?โ you asked him one day after class, catching him as he was about to leave.
โExcuse me?โ
โYour Uncle. How is he with cars?โ
โPretty good, usually.โ
โThink heโd be willing to fix my Daddyโs truck? Somethinโ about a fan belt or other. Heโll pay him good money.โ
โIโll ask him when I get home,โ Arvin smiled.
โHere, give my Daddy a call with your answer,โ you responded quickly, surprised your plan worked out so well. You tore out a piece of paper from your notebook and quickly wrote down your home phone number. โBest time to call is around 6.โ
โIโll remember that,โ he smiled at you, taking the piece of paper from you and putting it in his front pocket.
โThank you, Arvin,โ you smiled playfully before turning to walk away.
โMy pleasure,โ he responded softly, looking you over before walking off in the other direction.
Your daddy wasnโt pleased with you for going against his wishes, but itโs not like he could really make any argument.
โDo you have the money to pay Earl for it?โ you asked as you tidied up the shop.
โY/N, mind your manners,โ your Mama snapped.
โIโm not sayinโ anythinโ wrong,โ you defended. โWe need the truck for deliveries. If he canโt afford Earl, weโre gonna have to go to someone else. Arvinโs Uncle wonโt be expecting as much as Earl, if he even agrees. Heโll be doing you a favor.โ
Your Daddy was thoughtful before he spoke. โIf he decides to fix up the truck, I donโt want you talkinโ to that boy. Understand?โ
โYes sir,โ you sighed before removing your apron. โIโve finished up here, so Iโm gonna head home and start my homework.โ
โI want you to go straight home,โ your Mama quips. โDinner is all ready, you just need to heat it up.โ
โYes maโam.โ
โAnyone calls-โ
โI know, Mama,โ you sighed โleave it on the notepad on the kitchen counter.โ
โIs that an attitude I hear?โ
โNo maโam, but you tell me the same thing every day. I forgot one message one time-โ
โAnd look what a world of mess that caused.โ
โItโs not my fault Daddy gambled away that money!โ
โDonโt you sass me, young lady!โ your Mama snapped, spinning around quick. Daddy glared silently at the wall, biting his lower lip to keep quiet.
You thought of defending yourself, but it would only make things worse. โYes Mama,โ you conceded softly, โIโll see you when you get home.โ
You heard her sigh as you went to leave and you knew she felt bad, but itโs the same as always. Her frustration wasnโt with you, it was with your Daddy and his inability to get his shit together. However, youโre not allowed to live in your frustrations long. The phone rang at six o clock exactly, as soon as the grandfather clock started its chimes; you practically ran to answer it.
โHello?โ
โY/N? Are you okay?โ Arvin asked a little worried.
โIโm fine, Iโm fine. Just ran to make sure I didnโt miss the phone,โ you laughed breathlessly. โH-how are you?โ
โIโm fine, yourself?โ
โIโm fine.โ
โ....your Daddy home?โ
โUh no, he and my Mama wonโt be home till 6:30.โ
โOh, I thought you said 6 was the best time to call. Iโm-โ
โI did say 6. Iโm home alone and done with my homework every day by 6.โ
โOh,โ he responded softly and you could hear the smile in his tone.
โWhat did your Uncle say?โ
โHe said heโd be happy to do it. Heโll talk prices when he sees the condition of the truck.โ
โWill you be cominโ with him?โ
โI can.โ
โI-I think you should. You can help him, cause my Daddy is useless. Plus, knowinโ my Mama, sheโll whip up somethinโ as her way of sayinโ thanks.โ
โWill you be there?โ
โI will,โ you smiled to yourself.
โGuess Iโll see you tomorrow then.โ
โTomorrow it is,โ you almost sang before hanging up.
And thatโs how it started.
He showed up with his Uncle the next day, bright and early, and you did your best to not stare too long. Your Daddy had been keeping an eye on you, only letting you go over to them when your Mama finished making a lunch for both Arvin and his Uncle. Since it was Saturday, you had pinned your hair up into a tidy ponytail and put on one of your better dresses. Your parents thought nothing of it since Saturdays were the busiest days. They always wanted you to look your best when helping out around the store.
Arvin could barely focus on the truck he was supposed to be helping his Uncle with.
The following Monday, he called at exactly 6 and you two stayed on the phone right up until your parents pulled into the driveway. Then he called the next night, and the next, and the next...
Finally, two weeks later, he sat next to you at lunch.
โI like your dress,โ he commented softly after a beat.
โAll the talks weโve had on the phone, and you start off with that?โ
โWell, this is different,โ he laughed, โbesides, I know you arenโt even supposed to be speakinโ to me.โ
โI donโt care.โ
โDonโt start that. You donโt need another reason for your Mama to start gettinโ into you.โ
โAs if she needs a reason nowadays,โ you huffed. โMy Daddyโs been off trying to win back money he lost, and in the process heโs just making it worse. Almost put the store out of business. Apparently, thatโs also my fault for not pullinโ my weight in the store.โ
โHavenโt you been goinโ in on Sundays?โ
โDoesnโt matter. Still my fault.โ
โYouโll be out of there soon enough, Darlinโ,โ he sighed, taking your hand in his.
After that, you two were inseparable, much to the dismay of many of the guys at school.
โBet your Daddy doesnโt know youโre fuckinโ that Russell kid,โ spat Tyler, one of the most popular boys at school, as you started on your way home from your parents meat shop.
โIโm not doinโ anythinโ with anyone. You mind your business and stay away from me,โ you fire back.
You and Arvin really hadnโt done anything. He was a gentleman, despite what the people in town thought, and he wanted to ask for permission to date you before anything happened between you two.
โBet I can fuck you better than he can,โ he smirked.
โLeave me alone, Higgins.โ
โAwh whatโs wrong? Prettiest girl in the county getting worked up by-โ
โShe said to leave her alone,โ Arvin repeated as he slammed his car door shut.
โThe fuck you gonna do about it, Russell?!โ Tyler yelled back.
Before you could get between the two of them, Arvinโs fist blasted Tylerโs face.
โArvin stop!โ you yelled, standing back, trying to get away from the violent scene in front of you.
It was like he was another person; a transformation in plain sight. Tyler tried to fight back, but Arvin was on him like a bat out of hell. Tyler stumbled back but Arvin propped him up, only to shove him through one of the windowโs of your parentโs store.
โArvin, thatโs enough!โ you yelled, starting to cry. No, you hadnโt particularly cared for Tyler Higgins, but the amount of blood that was everywhere had you feeling sympathetic for the giant asshole.
โWhen a woman tells you to leave her alone, you leave her alone!โ he huffed, punching him again as your Daddy tried his best to pull him off of the now bloodied and badly beaten boy. โNow apologize, to the woman!โ
โIโm...Iโm sorry!โ he tries to mumble through swollen lips.
โIโm sorry who?!โ
โIโm sorry, Y/N!โ
โThatโs more like it now. Donโt ever do it again, you hearinโ me?! Or I promise youโll be sorry,โ Arvin spat, before finally releasing the boy and watching him crumble to the ground in a heap.
Your Mama was instantly at the boyโs side, trying to tend to his wounds, and make sure that he was okay.
โIโm real sorry about your window, Iโll pay for it as soon as I can,โ Arvin panted, facing your father, before turning his gaze on you. The sight of you shaking and crying truly broke his heart. You had been the first person outside of his family to treat him right and give a damn about him, and now you were just looking at him with pure fear in your eyes. He hadnโt meant to lose control like that, but seeing someone make you that upset set him off. Now you were probably just as afraid of him as you had been of Tyler Higgins.
However, your Daddy was seeing things in a new light after that.
โHe put that boy in the hospital,โ your Mama repeated later that night, exasperated as she took a sip of whiskey.
โYeah he did, but that boy was makinโ our little girl upset. The way he spoke to her...Iโm just sayin, if that Arvin boy is gonna protect her like that, she can at least be friends with him.โ
โAnd how about the damn window?โ
โHe can work that off by fixinโ things up around the shop. Said heโd pay for it, but you know what itโs like at that age-โ
โWe ainโt got enough money for you to-โ
โGoddamit! Iโll make the money back, now enough about it!โ
โYou know what? Iโm done trying to keep things afloat, you dumb son of a bitch!โ your Mama yells before getting up and storming off.
That was one of the loudest you can remember your house getting at night.
You kept your distance from Arvin for a while after that. You wouldnโt even let him drive you to your parents meat shop after school, even though you were both headed in the same direction. He watched you with the saddest eyes; it really had broken your heart. However, you promised yourself youโd never be with anyone who couldnโt control their temper. Youโd seen what blind rage could do a few times, when Daddy would lose his temper with your Mama. The cleanup afterwards was always gut wrenching and traumatizing. While you never thought Arvin would put his hands on you, you didnโt want to risk it. You didnโt want to be around any of it if you didnโt have to.
However, as fate would have it, you two ended up alone in his car one evening. Your Daddy asked him to drive you home so you wouldnโt have to walk in the pouring rain, which you appreciated because the rain was a deluge.
โWell, thank you,โ you said softly as he pulled up to your parentโs house.
โY/N, please wait,โ he called softly, resting his hand on your arm.
โArvin, the rain is gettinโ worse and I donโt want you to-โ
โPlease just...I am so sorry about what happened. You have no idea-โ
โItโs like you werenโt even yourself,โ you say, your voice sounding small to your own ears.
โI know and Iโm sorry. I try my hardest not to lose control but when I saw how uncomfortable you looked and how frightened...I just wanted to take care of you. I wasnโt even supposed to be there, but I wanted to pick some food up for my grandmother...seeing you...how was I not supposed to react?โ
โYou canโt lose control like that, Arvin.โ
โI know, I know. Iโm so sorry. Iโve missed you so much and I love you...God, I love you so much. I promise-โ
โYou what?โ you interrupted, not believing you heard his admission correctly.
โY/N, I love you so much. I didnโt wanna say anythinโ because weโre still figurinโ this out, but I swear to you...I do love you.โ
You didnโt even stop to think as you leaned across the console and cupped his face in your hands and kissed him. It hadnโt dawned on you that he reacted out of wanting to protect you instead of reacting out of sheer jealousy. No one had ever really gotten to know you because they wanted to understand you, they just wanted to get in your pants. Arvin let you get to know him and he got to know you. He took the time to learn what you loved, what scared you, what made you happy, and what made you sad. He had held you close on multiple occasions at school, when you felt overwhelmed and started to cry. Heโd even gone so far as to sneak into your house when everyone was asleep to make sure you were okay.
The more you thought about it, the more it all started to make better sense. Arvin truly did love you and you were finally allowing yourself to admit that you loved him.
But there was still that temper.
โYou canโt ever hurt me,โ you sob breathlessly as you two breakaway from each other.
โDarlinโ, I would never do anythinโ to hurt you,โ he responded softly, wiping your tears away.
โArvin, I mean it. The minute you raise your hand to me, Iโm walkinโ-โ
โHey, listen to me,โ he coaxed sincerely, โI will never lose control on you like that. Iโm not your Daddy, Y/N. I wonโt gamble our future away, I wonโt sleep with other women while youโre at home waitinโ for me, and I wonโt ever hurt a hair on your head. I love you, Y/N. I swear Iโll never do anythinโ to make you doubt that.โ He pulled you in for another kiss, but stopped short and pulled something from the backseat. โI got these for you,โ he smiled, handing you a few lilies that he tied to together into a mini bouquet. โ A small token of how sorry I really am.โ
โI love them,โ you beamed at him, taking in their scent.
โI love you, Y/N,โ
โAnd I love you, Arvin.โ
You brought him inside of the house after that, because the rain was relentless and there was no way you were letting him drive in such a downpour. Your parents called to let you know that they would be staying in the bedroom above the meat shop because the weather was so bad. You asked them if it was okay for Arvin to stay over since the storm wasnโt going to let up anytime soon.
โY/N-โ
โMama, Iโll feel awful if he drives home in this. You clearly know how bad it, cause you and Daddy arenโt even coming home. Iโll sleep in your room and he can sleep in mine.โ
โIโm sure heโs a capable driver-โ
โJust let the boy stay over for goodness sake,โ your Daddy slurred in the background.
You heard your Mama let out a frustrated sigh and you knew she wasnโt going to get her way. โDonโt do anything I wouldnโt approve of.โ
โYes Mama. I love you.โ
โI love you,โ she responded softly before hanging up.
That night, you cooked up a few pieces of chicken and split leftover mashed potatoes between the two of you.
โYour Mama teach you how to cook?โ Arvin asked, after making his third plate of food.
โActually my grandmother did,โ you smiled. โShe would let me stay at her house for a while when things got too out of control here.โ
โWell, she did an amazing job,โ he smiled at you.
Afterwords, you both sat out on the deck, drinking a small cup of gin while Arvin had a smoke and held you in his arms. You donโt think youโd ever felt so happy in your life. When it was time for you two to say goodnight, that proved to be harder than you expected.
โThese should be okay,โ you smiled at him, handing him a pair of your Daddyโs pajama pants.
โSure you canโt stay in here with me?โ
โAfter how hard it was for me to stop myself while we were on the couch, I think itโs best for me to sleep in my parents room,โ you giggled, toying with your fingers.
โI guess thatโs fair,โ he smiled before walking up close and wrapping his arms around you. โI love you.โ
โI love you,โ you smiled before kissing him.
Your arms were around him in no time and he holding you as close he could. When you felt him start to get excited, you knew you need to stop before it goes too far.
โIโm sorry,โ he laughed breathless, leaning his forehead against yours.
โItโs fine,โ you smiled โI should be gettinโ to bed anyway.โ
โGoodnight, Darlinโ.โ
โGoodnight,โ you smiled.
You tossed and turned in your parents bed for hours that night, trying to push out all of the thoughts your Mama would have made you repent for. But it was no use. It was around 2am when you found yourself walking to your bedroom.
โHey,โ you called softly from the doorway, butterflies turning into moths inside your stomach.
โCanโt sleep either, huh?โ he laughed, turning over to see you.
He was laying shirtless in your bed and you knew that if didnโt turn back in that moment, youโd disappoint the hell out of your parents. But you couldnโt find it in yourself to care. โThink I can stay in here with you?โ
โYou sure thatโs what you want?
โI am.โ
The moment you got under the covers, his lips were on yours and his fingers were exploring every inch of your body. You had done a few things, but nothing this intimate, and you had never been so excited. It didnโt take Arvin long to get you undressed and begging beneath him.
โHave a you ever done this before?โ he asked, looking down at you while stroking himself in his hand.
โNo,โ you responded softly, suddenly feeling small.
โItโs okay, baby. I just want you to be sure this is what you want. I can stop if you need more time.โ
โN-no, I want this with you, tonight. Iโm ready,โ you said, more to yourself than him.
He pressed two fingers into your greedy channel, and that had you moaning and rolling your hips against his. โShit, Iโm trying to get you ready for me, Darlinโ,โ he rasped, closing his eyes and quickening his pace.
โFeels so good,โ you moan beneath him, squirming as something inside you started to build up. โArvin...I...I-โ
โThatโs okay Sweetheart, just hang on to me,โ he breathed, trying to keep a steady pace as you gripped his arms and dug your nails in.
You let out a pitiful moan when you felt a wave of pleasure wash over you. You watched as the beautiful boy above you was doing his best to make this as enjoyable for you as possible, but his face was the true testament to how hard he was trying to contain himself. He dipped down and started to kiss on your neck, doing his best to not mark you up, as he continued to fuck into you with his fingers. When he started to trail hungry kisses down to your breasts, that had you weeping for him and pulling at his hair.
He took one of your nipples into his mouth, sucking and licking on it like it was his most favorite candy in the world. He used his thumb to make little circles on your clit, and you couldnโt believe the words that were coming out of your mouth. Your body felt it was being hit with waves of electricity all at once and you didnโt want it to stop. You needed more of him.
โBaby please,โ you pathetically begged, after he brought you off for a second time.
It was the first time showing the wicked grin that earned you his love.
โYou sure youโre ready?โ
โArvin please,โ you whined โI need you so much, please!โ
He kissed his way slowly up your body, his ego loving how desperate and needy you were for him to break him apart in a new way. However, your begging and desperate cries soon turn into painful hisses and choked breaths when he replaces his fingers slowly with his cock.
That had him feeling terrible.
โIโm sorry, baby,โ he cooed into your ear, before kissing your cheek. โIโm so sorry.โ
โHoly fuck!โ you cried out, feeling him stretch you out in the most painful way youโve ever felt.
โWant me to stop?โ
โNo no, I-I can handle it,โ you sobbed out.
โItโll feel so good, I swear,โ he coaxed, kissing away your tears that you were trying to stop from falling.
You closed your eyes and tried to focus on anything other than the pain, as he continued to plow slowly within you. You didnโt think it would get any better, and you were thinking that youโd never wanna do it again, until something inside you burst. After a few more uncomfortable thrusts, the pain was starting to get replaced by something more euphoric.
โOh my God,โ you moaned, your grip on his shoulders tightening. โBaby...oh fuck!โ
โYeah?โ he smirked down at you. โFeelinโ better?โ he asked, picking up the pace.
โPlease donโt stop,โ you begged, clawing at his back.
โNever needed someone so much,โ he groaned, sliding a finger between you two and starting to rub your clit.
โFuck!โ you mewled, your legs wrapping around him instinctively, clenching your eyes shut at the added pleasure.
โI love you so much, Y/Nโ he huffed, rubbing faster as he starts fucking you desperately, like heโs afraid youโll disappear in a moment. โIโll never do anything to scare you like that again,โ he promised, before dipping down and kissing you.
His kiss swallowed your pathetic moans as he brought you off again, loving the way you seemed to melt beneath him. Once your grip on him loosened a bit, he was back to assaulting your neck with his tongue. You gripped his hair, feeling your body starting to tighten again.
โI donโt think I can take much moreโ you whimpered, your body feeling numb from all the pleasure coursing through you.
โPlease, just one more time for me,โ he pleads, his own movements becoming erratic. โI love the way you come apart for me, Darlinโ. The way this pussy responds to me,โ he moans.
โArvin...oh my fuck!โ you moaned at his dirty words, clenching around him in a desperate vice.
โCanโt believe you chose me, canโt believe you love me,โ he huffed, his grip tightening on your waist.
โI love you so much,โ you whimpered, the knot in your core becoming tighter. โCanโt hold on.โ
โGive it to me, Darlinโ. Itโs okay,โ he cooed as you screamed his name beneath him.
A feeling like nothing youโd ever felt before washed over you in multiple waves. It was beyond pleasure and you almost felt like you werenโt in your own body. Arvinโs own pornographic yells are what brought you back down, as he continued to thrust into you. He rode out both of your orgasms, before collapsing softly onto your body. He rested his head on your chest, listening to to your heartbeat slowdown, as you both tried to regulate your breathing.
After a few moments, he slowly pulls out and you moan in dissatisfaction at the emptiness that now takes his place.
โWhereโs your bathroom, Sweetheart?โ he asked, standing up and pulling his boxers on.
โDown the hall on your right,โ you yawned, looking him over with a small smile on your face. He was so fucking beautiful.
As he walked out, you think about what just happened and what it means. Sure, you and him had been a couple for a while (as far as you were concerned), but you just gave yourself to him. All of yourself. He can tell you he loves you as much as he wants, but that doesnโt stop the anxiety from creeping in. Youโre sure that your Daddy told your Mama that he loved her a million times before ruining her life. However, when he made his way back into your room, damp cloth in hand, your fears had no choice but to fall away.
You hiss when you feel the warm cloth between your legs and on your most sensitive nerve. โIโm sorry, Darlinโโ
โI just want you to hold me,โ you whined, not caring how pathetic you sounded.
โAs you wish,โ he laughed before he grabbed his pack of cigarettes and a light, as he gets back in bed next to you, pulling you close to him. โHow are you feelinโ?โ he asked, placing a cigarette in-between his lips and lighting it.
โPerfect,โ you smiled as you laid your head on his chest.
โYeah?โ
โMhm, I love you,โ you responded softly, kissing his chest.
โI love you,โ he laughed softly, before taking a drag of his cigarette before removing it and kissing the top of your head.
You were thoughtful before you spoke. โI donโt want anyone to know.โ
โWhat? Y/N-โ
โJust here me out,โ you quickly interrupted. โI donโt want my parents givinโ us their unwanted opinions.โ
โYour Daddy likes me now.โ
โMy Mama doesnโt. She doesnโt like or trust you, and I donโt want her giving you a hard time.โ
โI can handle it,โ he sighed, taking another drag from his cigarette.
โI know you can, but you donโt deserve it. I donโt want it to be a secret forever, just until we graduate. Then we can just leave. We donโt have to stay here and put up with it.โ
โYou wanna leave with me after school?โ
โWhy wouldnโt I?โ
โItโs not movinโ too fast for you?โ he asked, looking down at you.
โDid you mean what you said earlier?โ
โYou know I did.โ
โThen itโs not movinโ fast at all,โ you replied softly. โItโs not easy...the feelings and fears I have, but I also know that Iโve never felt so happy or so loved. Things havenโt been easy for either of us, but when weโre together...I donโt feel as heavy or scared. I donโt feel like Iโm doomed to be miserable.โ
โI make you feel that way?โ
โYou make me feel better than anyone else ever has,โ you smiled up at him.
He kissed the top of your head before resting his head on top of yours and taking a drag from his cigarette. โIโm fine with waitinโ as long as youโre sure this is what you want.โ
โIโm positive.โ
When you woke up the next day, Arvin was gone but he had left you a small note.
โI figured it would be best for me to leave now then stick around and rip myself away from you when you wake up. I love you, see you soon.โ
He left the note next to the lilies heโd put together for you. When your parents came back home that day, your Daddy suspected nothing while your Mama was continuously eyeing you.
It didnโt matter to you though, because you had Arvin and he loved you. You two tried to be as discreet as possible, only embracing one another when you two were alone and only making love in the backseat of his car or when he was able to sneak you into his house (with the promise that youโd do your best to keep quiet).
You sat next to each other in every class you could, you sat a row behind him at church, and you went to every school function together (though you two only met up together when it came to dances).
Yes, everything between you and Arvin had been going smoothly and you couldnโt wait for your future together.
However, his temper still got the best of him.
โLenora told me about the fight you got into the other day,โ you sigh, getting comfy in the bed of his pickup, looking up at the stars.
โLenora needs to keep her damn mouth shut,โ he snaps, closing the back door of his truck. He throws two blankets in the back with you, placing the bag of booze next to you before hopping up inside the truck bed next to you. โShe had no right to tell you anythinโ.โ
โYou shouldโve told me, Arvin.โ
โWhy? So you can be mad at me like you are now?โ
โBecause you made me a promise that youโd get your temper under control.โ
โTheyโre not dead, are they?โ
โOne of em was damn near close,โ you say in protest.
โBut he isnโt,โ Arvin snaps at you and you just roll your eyes.
โWhatever,โ you say, opening the bottle of gin and taking a swig.
โYouโre really gonna stay mad at me now?โ
โIโm not anything towards you, Arvin. If you donโt see the problem, what the hell do I need to tell you?โ
โDonโt you do that.โ
โIโm not doinโ anything.โ
โYouโre shuttinโ me out.โ
โNo Iโm not,โ you huff. โIโm tired of havinโ the same talks with you. You canโt just fly off the handle whenever-โ
โI didnโt! Theyโve been botherinโ and bullyinโ her the same way Tyler was to you-โ
โWe all know what you did to Tyler,donโt we?โ
โAnd has he bothered you since?โ
โYou made your point.โ
โHave I?โ
โDonโt be an asshole, Arvin.โ you sigh, pulling away from him as he tries to hold you.
โYouโre really mad at me, arenโt you?โ
โNot mad. More disappointed, thatโs all-.โ
โY/N-โ
โWeโve talked about gettinโ married, Arvin.โ
โWe are gettinโ married,โ he smiles at you, motioning towards your jacket pocket.
โExactly, weโre gettinโ married and youโre still keepinโ secrets from me.โ
โI just didnโt see the point-โ
โYou didnโt want me to know because you didnโt want me gettinโ mad.โ
โCan you blame me?โ he asks, a shy smile playing on his lips.
โArvin-โ
โI know, okay? I have to do better, I have to tell you everythinโ or-โ
โOr you lose me,โ you state as if itโs the most simple thing in the world.
โOkay fine,โ he sighs, laying back and propping himself up on his elbows. โTell you everything or let you go. Now, come here,โ he smiles, pulling on the back of your dress.
Arvin had proposed to you 4 weeks ago and you didnโt hesitate to tell him yes. Your celebration was short lived, mainly because he proposed to you right after school let out and you both had work to do. He promised as soon as you both graduated, the first thing he was gonna do was take you to the courthouse and make you his wife. You couldnโt wear the ring yet (for obvious reasons), but you kept in your jacket pocket. Maybe thatโs why the thought of your parents knowing about two of you didnโt seem so scary anymore. You two were as committed to each other as two people could be, and you had talked about your future. Things were going well and you had faith that your lives wouldnโt be anything like your parentsโ.
โWeโre gonna get caught if we keep doinโ this in the middle of Mr. Higgins cornfield,โ you moan as Arvin trails kisses down your neck.
โAs long as we keep wakinโ up before him, weโll be fine,โ he smirks beneath you, his hands sliding up your dress. โYouโre not wearinโ-โ
โItโs been too long,โ you smirk, sitting up and straddling him.
โI had to stay away, you know that,โ he groans, pulling off his shirt and looking up at you. โI really do like that dress,โhe says breathlessly.
โYeah?โ you question slowly unbuttoning it. โMy Mama made it for me.โ
โIโll have to remember to thank her,โ he moans, eyes watching your every move intensely.
โGuess so,โyou moan, feeling him harden beneath you as you slowly let the straps slowly down your arms; your dress pools around your waist.
โYou are so fuckinโ beautiful, Darlinโโ, he husks as his hands travel up your sides, his finger tips light as feathers on your skin.
โMissed having you like this,โ you smile before you start grinding your hips into him. โBelow me,โ you moan โdesperate.โ
โDonโt tease me,โ he warns, his grip on you tightening. โYou know what happens when you do.โ
โThatโs exactly why Iโm doing it,โ you sigh, continuing to grind on him as you place your hands on his chest. โFuck, I canโt...shit!โ you moan as you cum on his jeans.
โCanโt wait anymore,โ he growls, hands fumbling with his belt while you push yourself up a little so he can get his pants down. โGotta be inside you,โ he groans, getting his pants down and himself free.
You both moan as you slowly sink yourself down on him, letting him split you apart the way you love the most.
โWe should almost get caught by your parents more often,โ he rasps with a softy laugh, as you start riding him.
โDonโt even,โ you moan, looking down as your hair falls in front of your face. โI never wanna be without you that long again. I hate sleeping without you.โ
โSoon...soon...fuck! Just like that!โ he moans as start to quicken your pace, rolling your hips against his. His hands make their way up your body and soon enough his hands are massaging your breasts, him kneading your nipples between his fingers every so often.
โArvin,โ you moan so softly you arenโt sure he even hears you.
โSo fuckinโ sexy,โ he growls, watching you use him to get you to the place of bliss you can only reach when heโs loving you. โCanโt wait to make you my wife.โ
โBaby, Iโm so close!โ you mewl, your finger nails digging into his chest.
โGive it to me, Y/N,โ he growls, โwent so long not being able to watch you fall apart!โ
โFuck!โ you cry out, cumming hard and almost losing your balance.
โSuch a good girl,โ he growls, before wrapping his arms around your waist.
In one swift move heโs upright, and youโre settling down on his lap. โFuck!โ
โDo you know how hard it is just watch you like that and not take over?โ he growls, thrusting into you while his hands travel all over your back.
โI love the way you watch me, like...like Iโm the most beautiful thing youโve ever seen,โ you moan, your hands finding perches on his shoulders as you wrap your legs around him.
โThatโs because you are,โ he huffs before planting kisses all over neck and chest. โYou are so precious to me. Iโll never stop loving you.โ
โI love...love you...Arvin, Iโm gonna-โ
โI need you to right now,โ he grunts, gripping your hair tight, pulling with just enough force to send you over that cliff of mind numbing pleasure.
He soon follows right over that cliff, screaming your name along with a few other obscenities. You both cling to each other, sweat dripping from both your foreheads, listening to each others gasping breaths.
โIโm sorry I didnโt tell you and Iโm sorry it happened,โ Arvin says after a moment. โI know my temper scares you and in all honesty, it scares me too. I am terrified of losinโ you and thatโs why I didnโt say anything.โ
โKeepinโ things from me only makes it worse,โ you sigh, looking down at him.
โI promise I wonโt keep anythinโ from you ever again, but you canโt leave me. I wouldnโt be able to handle it if you did,โ he confesses meeting your gaze.
โIโm ainโt goinโ anywhere, Arvin,โ you promise before pressing a soft kiss to his lips.
โI love you.โ
โAnd I love you.โ
You both stay like that for a moment later, before you both reluctantly decide itโs best for you both to get some sleep instead of going for another round. He cleans you up with his old white t-shirt before laying down one of the blankets and handing you the other to wrap yourself up in. He uses his denim button up and your dress as makeshift pillows for the both of you as you lay down. You open up the blanket just a bit for him to get under, closer to you.
As you start to drift into dreamland you faintly hear Arvin whispering things to you. You want to ask him what heโs saying, but youโre too tired. Right before you lose consciousness, you faintly hear โthere ainโt a thing I wouldnโt do for you. I will always love you and I will always protect you.โ
You succumb to darkness knowing that no matter what the future holds, itโll be fine. As long as youโre with Arvin, nothing could ever be wrong.
**
Youโre awoken by Arvin planting soft kisses up and down your cheek. You laugh and roll over into him, laying your head on his chest and arms across his waist.
โFive more minutes,โ you smile and he laughs.
โIโm gonna be in enough trouble as it is, besides, I told my grandma Iโd help her and Lenora set up for that thing today.โ
โFine fine,โ you sigh, finally opening your eyes and looking up at him. The way the sunlight is hitting his eyes has your heart melting. โYou are so beautiful.โ
โYouโre one to talk,โ he laughs before pressing a soft kiss to your forehead.
You both take your time getting up and dressed, enjoying the silence of the early morning. Arvin throws his t-shirt in the backseat as you settle into the passenger side and buckle up. As he starts his truck you think you see someone coming, but when you look again, theyโre gone and Arvin is quickly pulling away.
He reluctantly drops you off at Lindaโs diner, but promises to see you later and kisses you deeply before pulling off.
You feel like youโre on a cloud the whole day. You donโt even get irritated when your Mama starts questioning why youโve been sleeping over your friends so often. You tell her that with the way her and Daddy have been arguing lately, you just think itโs better to spend as little time as possible there. She wants to press the matter further, but the store is extremely busy and thereโs no time.
However, your good day comes an end at about 6 in the evening, when your Mama gets a call at the shop. Lenora hung herself earlier in the day and Arvin was the one who found her.
You canโt stop yourself as you grab the keys to the truck and run out the store. You need to see him. You need to be there for him. You know your parents are in the car behind you, probably wondering what in the sam-hell is wrong with you, but you donโt care. Nothing else matters except Arvin.
When you finally get to his grandmotherโs house, his Uncle is sitting on the chair on the front porch. โHeโs in his room,โ he says in the most somber tone youโve ever heard. When he sees the guilt in your eyes he quickly waives his hand. โHe needs you.โ
You nod before running into the house. When you open the door to his room, the scene in front of you breaks your heart. โBaby?โ
Arvin looks up at you with tear shot eyes, tears still streaming down his face. โI shouldโve been here,โ he whimpers through his cries.
โBaby no,โ you coo, running over to him and wrapping your arms around him.
โI shouldโve been here,โ he sobs again, wrapping his arms around you.
โYou didnโt know, Arvin. There was no way to know,โ you respond, your own tears gently dropping now.
Your Mama comes to his doorway, ready to yell at you for the inappropriate outburst and current scene in front of her, but all of that changes when she sees him holding you and crying hard.
No one protests when you tell them youโre going to stay the night. Youโre his only comfort and your parents just donโt feel right making you leave his side.
โIโll never forgive myself,โ he sobs, as you both lay in his bed at night, with your head resting on his chest.
โBaby, thatโs not what Lenora would want. You took such good care of her and loved her so much. She isnโt blaming any of this on you,โ you say softly, trying to calm him.
โThank you for being here with me tonight,โ he sniffs, looking down at you and pressing a soft kiss to your head.
โAs if Iโd be anywhere else,โ you respond softly, looking up to meet his mournful gaze.
You both slowly fall asleep to the sounds of his soft sobs, your heart both heavy with guilt and mourning.
**
2 months later
In the days that followed Lenoraโs death, you did your best to comfort Arvin. You were more sure than ever that your parents had pieced together that you two were together, but you didnโt have it in you to give much of a shit. Arvin was doing his best to hold it together and you were doing your best to be there for him. If that meant pissing off your Mama, then so be it. You only had a month or so left until you and Arvin could get married anyway.
Arvin lost interest in school and eventually just stopped coming. He quit his job at the gas station and became a carpenter. He told you that it was because he needed to save up money for a proper place for the both of you, but you knew better. He couldnโt take going to that school and not seeing Lenora all while being forced around the people who tormented her the worst. You knew heโd lose control.
He was doing his best to keep his temper at bay, but the more time went on, the more he found out information that made him want to do things he knew better than to do.
He was desperately trying to keep his promise to you.
โShe was pregnant!โ he yelled after you got into his car one day, picking you up from Sarahโs house.
โWhat?โ
โLenora was pregnant, and I bet you anythinโ it was that son of a bitch Preston!โ
โArvin-โ
โI know, Y/N. I know it was him and I bet you anythinโ she told him!โ
โHow do you know she was pregnant?โ
โOfficer Meyers told me when I got back from work.โ
โShit,โ you muttered, running a hand through your hair. โArvin-โ
โIf I just wanted to leave with you one day, would you go?โ
โWhat?โ
โIf I just came to get you one night...would you come with me?โ
โYou know I would.โ
โYou sure? You could just pick up and leave?โ
โWhat are you-โ
โAre you sure you could? Itโs a lot to ask and I know-โ
โArvin, I would go anywhere for you.โ
โI love you,โ he sighed as pulled up to your house, you both finding your Mama standing on the porch, hands on her hips. โShit.โ
โIโll deal with her, donโt worry about it. You go home and try to rest. I love you,โ you smiled before getting out of the car.
You slowly made your way up the walk way, feeling small under the intensity of your motherโs gaze. โGoodnight Y/N,โ Arvin called from his car. โYou too maโam,โ he motioned towards your Mama.
โYou get home safe, Arvin. My prayers and well wishes to your grandmother,โ she responded, not taking her eyes off of you.
The minute you two got into the house, she laid into you.
โYouโre sleepinโ with that boy!โ she yelled as soon as she closed the door behind her.
โMama, Iโm not-โ
โDonโt you dare lie to your Mama, girl,โ she warned, following you into the kitchen. โMr. Higgins told me he saw Arvin leavinโ his cornfield the day Lenora hung herself. He said there was a girl in his car and heโs pretty sure he it was you! Everyone sees you both around town all the time! I know what-โ
โYou donโt know anythinโ, Mama! You just donโt like him!โ
โHeโs gonna get you pregnant and ruin your life!โ
โJust like Daddy got you pregnant and ruined yours?!โ
โYouโre too young for-โ
โIโm graduatinโ in a few months, Mama! Iโm graduatinโ and gettinโ the hell out of here!โ
โAnd just where do you think youโre goinโ?! College?!โ
โAnywhere is better than here!โ you yelled, tears coming down your face.
โYouโll see! When that boy ruins your life, youโll come back cryinโ!โ she yelled up the steps after you.
The only issue? You had lied to her. You were pregnant. You had planned to tell Arvin when he picked you up from Sarahโs, but he was already so fired up. ย You telling him that after he had just told you Lenora was pregnant when she killed herself was definitely not in your best interest.
You went to bed that night telling yourself that youโd tell Arvin the next day.
However, you didnโt see him the next day, or the day after that, or after that.
You went a week without seeing him before you heard. Pastor Preston had been killed, Arvin was responsible, and heโd fled town. You didnโt want to believe it, but in your heart and in your gut you knew it was true. You cried yourself to sleep that night, because somewhere in the back of your mind, you knew it was only a matter of time before it happened.
You few days later, you heard Sheriff Bodeckerโs sister and her husband had been killed. Both had been shot to death. There was a terrible feeling in your stomach that told you Arvin was responsible. However, you knew him and you knew there had to be a reason. Arvin may have been hot headed, but he wouldnโt have flown off the handle (let alone murder two people) without a reason.
A few days later, it was announced that Sheriff Bodecker was killed, with photos of what his sister and her husband been up to found at the scene. You could feel it in your bones that Arvin was responsible for that too, based on where they found Bodecker.
You wanted to be angry with him. You wanted to hate him. But you couldnโt. Arvin was your best friend. Your soul mate. You couldnโt just turn that off, even with knowing what he was capable of.
The same thoughts were racking your brain that had been for 2 months. Arvin was gone and graduation was two weeks away. Since youโre only 2 months pregnant, itโs easy enough to hide the truth, and you want to keep it that way. No one in this dead end town needs to know.
You have enough money saved for you to get out and move away, but youโd need to work forever to support yourself and the baby. It would be worth it though. Youโd be free of this town and all of its ghosts.
โY/N?โ a deep voice asks, creeping into your room, causing you to jump.
โArvin?! What the fuck?!โ you whisper yell, forcing yourself to sit up.
โI know, I know I have so much to explain, but we have to go. And now,โ he sighs, frantically searching your room, probably looking for a bag to pack some clothes in.
โWhat the...no! You donโt just get to come back here after months of being gone and just expect me to leave with you!โ
โBaby, I know-โ
โDonโt fucking โbabyโ me! You shot and killed a man, then ran off, killed more people, and then just fucking kept going! You left me!โ
โI had to!โ he sighs, finally finding a bag, despite you telling him no. โIf I wouldโve gotten caught and youโd been with me, they wouldโve thought you had something to do with it!โ
โArvin-โ
โI got us a place and I fixed it up nice! Itโs far from here, but itโs ours. Itโs our home. Iโm riskinโ everythinโ to be here right now, but youโre worth it. Youโre worth everythinโ and I-โ
โIโm pregnant, Arvin,โ you admit softly.
That had him stopping in his tracks.
โWhat?โ
โIโm two months pregnant,โ you repeat, turning your gaze away from him.
โBaby, thatโs great!โ he gushes, dropping the bag and rushing to your side. โWe can-โ
โArvin, youโre a wanted man. We canโt just leave like nothinโ happened.โ
โWhy canโt we? Why canโt we just start our lives together?โ
โBecause weโre still kids ourselves! Because you murdered 4 people! Youโre a murderer and-โ
โI promise that Iโll explain all of it in the car, just please come with me,โ he begs desperately.
You donโt know why you tried to fight it, because thereโs really only way this is going to go.
You get up and quietly start getting dressed while Arvin resumes packing your clothes. You watch him pack the few trinkets that actually mean something to you, before grabbing they money youโve been saving over the years while working for your parents. You take a look around your room and sigh.
This is the last time youโre ever going to be in it.
You both quietly make your way down the steps and you stop to leave a note for your parents on the notepad on the kitchen counter. When you get outside, Arvin helps you inside the pickup truck. He quietly closes the door and runs over to his side, quickly closing his door and driving off.
He starts talking about everything that happened, while you watch your parents house become smaller and smaller in the rear-view mirror, coming to terms with the choice that youโve made and the new life youโre about to begin.
โAs for Bodeckerโs sister, I didnโt know-โ
โI donโt wanna talk about that now, Arvin,โ you sigh, deciding that all of it could wait for another day. โTell me about our place.โ
โYou wanna hear about...that?โ he asks, tone of surprise very apparent.
โI wanna hear about our future, our home, our life together,โ you softly smile, looking over at him and taking his free hand in yours.
โI love you, Y/N.โ
โ& I love you, Arvin,โ you hum.
As he drives on, you listen happily and force your worries out of your mind. You couldnโt leave Arvin. You couldnโt leave him and you wouldnโt. Arvin could be walking into depths of hell and youโd be right there beside him, holding his hand. Youโd follow him anywhere, even into the dark.
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GOOD GIRLS GO TO HELL
CHAPTER 1
pairing: arvin russell x female!reader
summary: In the eyes of extremely strict parents, 'good' girls go to hell, but they don't know that they are handing over their own daughter to the devil โ known to all as Rev. Teagardin.
wc: 3.8k
warnings: language, mentions (not depictions) of abuse, manipulation, religious fanaticism, angst
a/n: This idea has been on my mind since the day I watched the movie, so... here we go!
English is not my first language. I am getting help from google translator and he is not always a good ally, so I apologize for any typos or grammar errors.
Y/N โ your name
"I don't usually interfere that way. It would be best if she came here willingly. She needs to be open to accept all the blessings that God will bring to her life." Rev. Teagardin took a step forward, considering the request of a mother and father completely desperate for the salvation of their only daughter.
"We tried everything. We found great references about a boarding school called 'Good Pastor', but a week later they called to report that she had run away! Our daughter appeared a few days later in the company of three strange girls. One of them is a single mother, our Y/N shouldn't hang out with those kind of people." The woman's words contained disgust. She was tired of watching her daughter ruin her own life. The girl had become a topic of conversation in the town and a shame for the whole family.
"The truth is, we don't know what to do with Y/N. Day after day she becomes more rebellious. She doesn't respect us." Mr. Henson shared the same agony as his wife, but both see Preston as the solution to this problem.
"We don't want our only daughter to go to hell! You need to help us, Reverend. We believe that you are the only one capable of driving the devil out of her. In the name of God, save our little Y/N!"
In absolute silence, the preacher walked near the window, watching Y/N. She was sitting on the hood of Mr. Henson's car and her body was lulled by the gentle breeze that touched the skirt of the dress she wore, revealing her legs that should have been silky smooth. Smiling, the man looked at the girl's parents, knowing exactly what to do to save Y/N's soul.
"I'm glad you came to me. God will be my guide to help your daughter. Now, I would like to talk to her for a while."
Extremely grateful, Y/N's parents agreed and left the church for a few seconds. When they returned, Y/N was with them. The girl's curious eyes moved from side to side, until they found Preston Teagardin with his hands on his hips. He was at the altar, the cross appearing behind his head left him with a divine aura, but the girl remembers the day she saw the preacher humiliate โ indirectly โ the chicken liver dish that Emma Russell prepared with such affection. If he said those horrible things to a religious woman like Emma, Y/N didn't want to imagine what he might be thinking about her at the moment. Maybe he was wondering why she hasn't started to burn while walking on sacred ground, but it was him who was burning. Burning with desire. A sin that he identifies in others, but never in himself.
"Hello, you must be Y/N." The man approached, his eyes shining like a hungry predator who had just found the perfect prey. "You don't usually visit the house of God."
"But I'm sure that is about to change." Y/N's mother replied, looking at her daughter hopefully.
Y/N may not be an especially easy girl to handle, but she never understood why her parents didn't respect her space. She never visited the church often and that number dropped to zero when they started to force her to go with them. Over the years, Knockemstiff residents have turned religion into a disease. It's close to insanity and Y/N Henson doesn't want that for her life. Despite being seen as a sinner, she still prays every night. She gets down on her knees and talks to God.
"Dear, your dad and I brought you here to talk to Reverend Teagardin..."
"What? You said you would come here to confess and then we would go home!" Y/N protested angrily. She was ready to retrace her steps to the exit when her father took her arm.
"Y/N, we just want the best for you. Talking to the reverend can be a good start."
"And we are not giving you another option." Mrs. Henson completed, remaining firm in her decision. "Your father and I agreed not to participate in this conversation. We will walk around the town and then we come back here to get you."
"I can take her home... If you agree." Teagardin said, hiding his real intentions and touching the girl's shoulder. She was so small around him and looked so vulnerable. He smiled when he realized that.
"Oh, that's very kind, Reverend. Thanks." Y/N's mother replied, feeling enchanted by the man's benevolence. "Be a good girl." She said, kissing her daughter's forehead.
The preacher accompanied them to the door and having no other option Y/N walked through the church, staring at the cross nailed to the wall. She never felt that she was turning away from God, but looking back is exactly what she did.
"Now it's just me, you and Him." The reverend's words brought Y/N out of her own thoughts and she turned to him, crossing her arms in the process. This made her breasts more visible under the black dress she wore and Teagardin noticed.
"I can go and you tell my parents that you talked to me, but it didn't work because I'm a hopeless case. It's simple."
"I can't lie to your parents. I also don't think you're a hopeless case, Y/N." The man admitted, going to the first bench and sitting down. "We can talk?"
"Like... about my sins?"
"No. A normal conversation. Why don't you start by telling me about your life?" He patted the bench, silently inviting her to sit beside him.
Y/N didn't understand how a simple conversation could help, but she found the idea pleasant. Showing a shy smile, she approached Teagardin and sat down next to him, leaving a space between their bodies. Once again she looked at the cross, beginning to speak:
"I work for Ms. Fowler, she has a chicken coop and some pigs... I don't do much, but I like to help take care of animals and she says they like me too." At that moment Y/N looked at the preacher and imagined that she would find him with an expression of disinterest. The same expression of disinterest that her parents show when she tried to start a conversation or simply tell how her day was. They were always busy, but Teagardin was completely focused on everything she said and with a small smile on the corner of his lips.
"So, do you take care of the animals? I'm impressed, I don't know many girls who risk their lives by entering a pigsty."
"It's a dangerous place." She let slip a sweet laugh, feeling light, as she hadn't felt for a long time. "I understand them."
"I can see that you have a great relationship with animals, but what about your friends? Tell me a little about them." Those words were enough to destabilize Y/N. Any sign of happiness disappeared from her face and everything went gray, just like the view through the church windows. The rain was close and Y/N controlled herself not to start crying.
Like a sniffer dog, Preston felt this was a sensitive subject for the girl โ maybe an open wound โ and waited patiently until she decided to share it with him.
"I was never good at making friends, but I used to have a friend at school. Her name was Isabella. We were inseparable, but one day her father received a job offer in another city... Despite the distance, she called me every day in the late afternoon" The nostalgia was noticeable in her voice and the way her face softened with small memories. Isabella and Y/N were like sisters, but Mrs. Henson never approved of that friendship. "I am three years without news of my best friend. She never called or answered my letters and I don't know why, reverend."
"Have you never been to visit her?"
"My parents won't let me out of Knockemstiff."
"You don't have to go alone. They can go with you..."
"They don't care about me or what I want." Y/N said, shaking her shoulders as if this feeling was mutual, but deep down she knew it wasn't. "My mom said I have the power to turn people away and if Isabella walked away from me, it is certainly my fault."
"Your mother shouldn't say that." Teagardin looked deeply hurt. The situation was worse than he imagined, this family needs his help.
Y/N needs his help.
"Well, I lost Isabella's friendship, but I got three new friends!" The girl informed, as if she had finally found her place. "Two of them I met at the boarding school. The third helped us to escape and she has a beautiful baby. They work together in a bar away from the city..."
"What do they do in this bar?" The reverend had some suspicions, but he wanted to hear her confess.
"They... dance." Y/N said slowly. "I know it can look wrong, but they are good people and I don't understand why everyone looks at these girls with..."
"Have you ever been there?" Preston needed to know, but the girl just bowed her head. Sighing deeply, he stretched his arm over her shoulders, ending the distance between their bodies. "It's all right... God is merciful and benevolent. He forgives all of our sins, but He does not forgive lies."
"It was only once. I swear!" In the same instant that the words left her lips, she hid her face in Teagardin's chest and he took the opportunity to hug her, and feel the sweet perfume of her hair. It smelled like innocence.
"You made a mistake by going there. That place is not for family girls."
"I was just tired of everything... So, I thought about going there to have a drink and forget about the problems."
"Learn one thing..." The man said softly, running his fingers through her hair. "When problems arise and you feel alone, start praying. God is your best friend. And I am also here to help you."
"Thanks, reverend."
"Never go back to that place again. You shouldn't be drinking... and smoking."
"Wait..." The girl moved away from Teagardin, looking him straight in the eye. "Did my parents say that?"
"I was in town when I saw you smoking with a boy. He approached you and passed the smoke to your mouth... And then he kissed you. Is he your boyfriend?"
"Oh, you saw me with Arvin..." Shame consumed Y/N, turning her cheeks into two tomatoes. "But we are not together. It was our first kiss... My first kiss."
The moment they shared in the car had been magical. Arvin was always different from the Knockemstiff boys. He never judged Y/N for her actions. He understood her, but sometimes some problems were so big that they made the girl run away from him. All Arvin wanted was to hold her in his arms and protect from all the evil in the world.
"You need to stay away from these people. Starting with this young guy." The preacher's words captured Y/N's attention, confusing her. "You can't see it now, but those friendships are not good for you. They are driving you away from your true purpose. And Arvin Russell is taking advantage of your innocence to..."
"Arvin would never do that." She stated in all letters, not letting him finish the assumption. "I think... I think he likes me."
"There is a big difference between love and carnal attraction, and boys his age think of only one thing." Teagardin insisted, using a peaceful tone of voice. He was so convincing, that despite knowing Arvin for a long time, Y/N wondered about the boy's real intentions. He was always kind and respectful, or maybe that's what she thought, but with the help of the reverend she was beginning to understand, and the feeling of being used was difficult to digest. "I saw the way he looked at you... I saw the sin in his eyes."
"This cannot be true... W-We are not talking about the same person! He's d-different!"
"It doesn't matter who you believed in all this time or what you accepted to... to be like them. In the end, you are alone. You know it." When Preston finished, she was completely broken. It was cruel, but someone needed to open her eyes. Y/N deserved the truth. "I know it is difficult, but I am here for you." He buried her against his chest in a bear hug, wishing feel her soft, warm body in his arms again. Y/N returned theย hugย โ and then started to cry.
Her friends were not her friends.
Her parents were right.
She felt confused. Lost. But the reverend was beside her to show a new path free from sin and delusions.
"Do you know Proverbs 28:13?" He asked, holding her face in his hands. With his fingertips he wiped away a few tears and she smiled, shaking her head. "Whoever tries to hide his sins will not succeed, but the one who confesses his sins and leaves them behind will find mercy. Are you ready for this?"
"Yes, reverend." That was the confirmation he needed.
Preston Teagardin always believed that he had a special connection with God. With the right words he had the power to reach the hearts of these girls and offer them redemption. In his dark mind, they were privileged to be touched by a holy man like him. He was doing them a favor. And now it's Y/N's turn.
"First, you need to be free from your sins." The man looked with adoration for the little fallen angel. Slowly, he touched her knees, feeling the smooth skin and after a sigh, the girl was in his hands.
"Reverend..."
"Shhh. Just trust me." He said when his hands disappeared under her dress. His touch was sacred, something she had never experienced, but Y/N's conscience screamed that this was wrong. "Stand up so I can take your panties off. I need to feel you..." She got up, but ran quickly away from him, escaping his dirty hands.
Disappointment appeared in her eyes in the form of tears. It was impossible not to feel used. Again. Influenced by him, Y/N believed that her friends were a problem in her life and that they were moving her away from God's plans, but the real sinner is inside the church. His understanding, concern and kindness never existed. It was all part of the game. He needed to earn her trust before he could attack.
"You... You are a wolf in sheep's clothing! A liar! I thought for the first time someone was understanding my side, but you just want to fuck with me!"
"You got it wrong..."
"S-Stay away from me!" Y/N warned when Teagardin tried to approach. Fear coursed through her veins, spreading through her body like a drug. She didn't know what to do, but she knew she didn't want to be touched by him that way. "If you approach me, I swear I make a scandal! The whole city will know who you really are!"
"No one will believe you." He took a step forward. "You need help. I'm the only one who can..."
"Stop that shit! Do not say that the devil is in me, when you are trying to abuse a girl who is old enough to be your daughter! You are the devil, Teagardin!" For the first time she saw the anger in his eyes. Preston would never agree with that, but that is his true face. He is the devil in disguise and this was confirmed the instant he advanced on her.
Y/N ran to the exit, screaming desperately for help, even though she knew she was alone in this nightmare. With shaking hands, she tried to open the door, but the reverend took her in his arms. Compared to the girlโs small, slender body, he was stronger than she was, but Y/N resisted and hit her knee in the middle of his legs, reaching his weak point. The man let out a loud growl and walked away, seeking support on one of the wooden benches. Taking advantage of the distraction, Y/N opened the door and ran as fast as she could. Teagardin thought of running after her to finish what he started, but he gave up as soon as he saw her cross the threshold of the church, running in the rain as if her life depended on it. She didn't look back, just kept running until she disappeared into the trees.
...
The day turned into night, covering everything with its dark cloak, while rain fell mercilessly on Knockemstiff. Y/N stumbled along the road, hugging her own body in an unsuccessful attempt to warm up. Tears were still streaming down her cheeks, mixing with the raindrops, but the girl's mind was elsewhere.
After what happened at the church, her faith was in pieces. She always knew that bad men walked on Earth, but she never imagined that the preacher was one of them. The way he touched her was disgusting. She wanted to scream, take the pain out of her chest and run back home to tell her parents what happened, but Teagardin's words were stuck in her head, hurting her:
"In the end, you are alone. You know it."
"No one will believe you."
Unexpectedly โ or maybe that was a divine sign โ a car approached the road Y/N was on. She was surprised to hear the noise of the engine and looked back. Despite the rain and the headlight blinding her for a few moments, Y/N recognized the old car and the boy on the other side certainly recognized her too. Arvin left his truck without a second thought, not caring about the pouring rain wetting his clothes in a matter of seconds.
"What are you doing here?" He asked, needing to raise his voice so she could hear. The girl opened her mouth to reply, but gave up, looking away.
Arvin realized that something was wrong. It was common to see Y/N walking around the city, but not in these circumstances. Before she looked away, he noticed the pain in her eyes. It was no secret to him that she had a difficult relationship with her parents, but this time it was different.
For a moment the worry made him forget that they were both still in the rain and when he realized this, the boy immediately guided her to the car. When she was safely in the passenger seat, he bypassed the vehicle and took the driver's seat. Rain was no longer a problem, but the cold persisted and Arvin grabbed his jeans jacket from the back seat.
"Here." He handed it to her and Y/N mumbled a small 'thanks', wearing the jacket. "So... what happened? You are far from home. It is dangerous to go out in the middle of a storm like this..."
"My intention is to stay away from home. The storm is an extra." The girl tried to relax, hiding her real emotions but it was obvious that she was not well.
"Did you argue with your parents again?"
"I would prefer that." She replied, forcing a laugh. Getting into an argument with her parents was common for her and seemed small compared to what actually happened. But what really happened was suffocating her. "I can tell you everything, r-right?"
"You know you can." Arvin said, holding her hand. The simple contact made their hearts accelerate and Y/N was grateful to have him by her side.
Feeling encouraged, she began to tell what happened at the church. The fact that her parents insisted that the devil was inside her, made Arvin angry. He never understood what the problem was with Mr. and Mrs. Henson about this. Y/N was not sick. All she needed was love and they never gave it to her.
Y/N didn't want to delve into the details of her conversation with the new preacher, but Arvin heard the fear in her voice when she mentioned his name. She said he was good with words, and very persuasive. He easily won her trust and that was her worst mistake. Arvin stopped listening when she said that the man's hands disappeared under the dress she was wearing. Anger consumed him quickly, making his blood boil and he clapped his hands on the steering wheel. With a vision blurred by tears, Y/N looked at him with concern. The tension was clear throughout his body; his jaw was tightly clenched and his hands were shaking as his fingers tightened on the steering wheel. Arvin always had an explosive temper โ paternal inheritance โ, especially when the people he cared about were hurt.
"The preacher will never touch you again. I promise." He stated with conviction, bringing his attention back to Y/N. She looked tired, crying silently and the boy opened his arms for her to snuggle against his chest. Playing with a lock of her hair, he said: "I always knew there was something wrong with him. I should be there for you..."
"It's okay, Arvin. I'll be fine and I'll forget what happened... I just need to stay away from the church. This is easy for me." Y/N knew it wouldn't be so easy, but to calm him down, everything was welcome.
"You cannot protect him."
"I am not protecting him, but I know you..." She murmured softly, running a hand over his chest. "My life is a mess, you are the only one who believes in me. So, I'm just asking you not to do anything stupid... Because... Because I need you here." Arvin relaxed at her words. It was nice to know that she wanted him around in this difficult time. Y/N would have his support forever. And his love. For her sake, he decided to act with caution, but this does not mean that Teagardin will not suffer the consequences of his actions.
With undisclosed feelings, they remained embraced, just enjoying each other's company. It had been a long day. Arvin remembered the fallen tree in the middle of the road, forcing him to take the long way home, but that path brought him to Y/N. He was happy that it was he who found her in the middle of this storm.
"You need to rest. I will take you home." The boy broke the silence and Y/N moved away from him, shaking her head.
"No! I don't want to go home! My parents... they go..."
"I'll take you to my house." Arvin said, catching her cheek with his hand and watching the panic disappear from her eyes. With a smile, he added: "Grandma misses you."
โข a/n: This is the first fic I publish here and I'm very nervous!! (Possibly I will do a second part of this) Btw, criticism is welcome!!
(CHAPTER TWO HERE)
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