#anyway the second chapter is finally almost done!!! I’m SO FUCKING EXCITED TO UPLOAD IT AAAAAAA

[jessefadenfbc]

Writing Dylan’s character is.... kinda difficult tbh. Obviously he’s one of the main focuses in the game, buuuuuut unfortunately he doesn’t have a lot of lines or anything. The only time we see him is when he’s corrupted by the Hiss, so I’m going in blind here with his character.

Hopefully he’s written okay though! He’s not the main focus in the fic but he’s still there and deserves character development goddammit

I’m using @subjectsix’s Dylan fics as smol research bc they write him so fucking well

#here we go again! #anyway the second chapter is finally almost done!!! I’m SO FUCKING EXCITED TO UPLOAD IT AAAAAAA #Definitely expect it to be uploaded within the next couple days #also oops #but max and Chloe aren’t in it just yet #there will be a lot of them soon tho! #planning on making this at least about 50000 words hehehehe #control #jesse faden #control remedy #control game #control 2019 #controlposting #remedy control #remedy entertainment #my post #emily pope #dylan faden #simon arish #max caulfield #chloe price #LISXControl

[oh-for-fic-sake]

The Stand In Chapter Three

Masterlist

The filming is done and the trailer is coming ,but you have to deal with some unexpected consequences of being so close to Henry. Then your mother drops a bombshell that she may have let your career change slip to one of your many overprotective brothers. Meanwhile Henry has a revelation with some help from Anya and Joey.

Warnings: Adult Situations +18, Masturbation, fluff, Swearing

A/N:so here is chapter three,as I have said before I'm trying to make this realistic from a fangirls point of veiw. this is going to be a bit of a slow burn to so buckle up guys! anyway I hope you enjoy xxx see you soon xxx

Taglist: @dark-night-sky-99 @thummbelina @sofiebstar @jellicorn05 @m3anwhil3misha @thefangirlsblog  @al-wiisa  @healojane​  @thatgirly81​ @angelofthorr @iloveyouyen​   @two-unbeatable-beaters​

As the scene was called to an end a small round of applause was held, everyone seemed to be pleased with your performance which was a relief...your performance did dictate weather they kept there jobs or not so it was safe to say it was smiles all round. You finally let loose a breath slumping your shoulders 'Keira' receded and you shrunk under everyone's gaze blushing. You looked around seeing the crew and cast. Everyone seemed happy and you hadn't forgotten any of your cues or lines. You looked down at your shaking hands as relief and adrenaline flooded your system. You'd been shaking for most of the scene but thankfully the thick material of the costume covered it well. The scene itself was...Intense the air was thick for most of it as you Joey and Henry's interactions were carefully executed there were a few small hiccups but nothing you couldn't overlook...They added to the scene if you was quite honest.

As silly as it was you wanted to cry but was desperate to hold back not wanting to be silly. You jumped looking up as you were almost body slammed into a hug, the torso wasn't to wide so it had to be .Joey. You smiled brightly as the crew began to move about the hustle and bustle of set resumed. Joey plastered himself to you hugging tight and pulling you up off the floor for a second laughing.

"See? Nothing to worry about! That was brilliant Tink's!" You laughed nervously

"Err....Thank you...Can you let me go now...Please Joey?" He quickly released you letting you turn to face him gulping as you saw Henry smiling nodding.

"H-how do you feel about us- I mean all this now then?...It- wasn't as scary as you thought....W-was it?" You glanced to the floor and took a calming breath trying to get yourself under control then looked at the man sheepishly twiddling you fingers.

"N-no it was...Fun? Almost...You know once it got going...." he smiled sweetly at you

"Good! Good that’s err yeah I'm happy you found it fun....I'm sorry about you know....I err kind of forgot how err...I mean I...I tried to be gentle but..." you shook your head at him quickly

"Oh-oh that was...It's fine I knew it was going to happen but....It was my fault honestly and it doesn't even hurt so no harm done...It- your strength surprised me is all!" You said referring to what could have been seen as a incident, in the scene Geralt had to throw Keira to a wall and pin her there to interrogate her a little, at this point in the story neither really knew who the other was.

Tomasz had said the way you were so unprepared for him to throw you back was good that your surprise and flinching added to the scene making it more believable. Henry had misjudged his strength and you'd actually banged the back of your head on the faux brick of the 'corridor' he had gone to pull back immediately fearing he had hurt you, but you kept the scene going holding him still discretely out of shot and continued with the dialogue while you still had the nerve.

Henry smiled guilty he hadn't liked seeing you wince but he was glad that you'd continued he doubted any other takes would have been as authentic he would have held back to much.

"Still...I-I will try to be careful I don't want to hurt you...Your so tiny." Tomasz came over followed by Lauren both wearing huge grins.

"Yes! That was perfect! You did wonderful absolutely brilliant....Now your not needed for filming for another three or four days today was just so we can throw out a trailer...It should be done in a day or so?" You frowned at him days?

"That’s...quick is it always that quick?" Lauren chuckled

"No...but the trailer was done we just needed clips of you all the team need to do is slot you and a few of your lines in as a little narration and thats it!...With any luck it will be released on the app by....oh I’d say Thursday morning? If they upload it as soon as they get it...But in reality it will probably be by tomorrow afternoon sometime, after covid everyone is scrabbling to get their trailers out asap" Tomasz nodded in agreement then snapped to you remembering something.

"Yes and you will be announced as Keira the same day so be prepared." You blinked dumbfounded

"A-anounced?" He smile at you encouragingly

"Just on the main official websites, social media that sort of thing...You may end up having a Wikipedia page to but we don't have much control on that one...Don’t look so worried everything should go smoothly...Speaking of everything going smoothly would you like to watch what you’ve just done?" you gulped and shook your head

"Fuck no...I...I can't watch myself-OH FUCK I-I just realized...I cant watch it when it comes out!!..." All four laughed as you yelled swearing cursing to yourself Tomasz laughed patting your back.

"Don’t you worry you can work yourself up to it! Everything will be fine! You may get more media attention due to the circumstances of your audition...We are going to let it out that you was working on set and stepped up...we are naming you as our saving grace and explaining that if you didn't step in witcher would have been cancelled, that should help you get a welcome reception...If things do get hairy we will sort it out..Now as much as I'd love to chat we have a few more scenes with these two today and we need to shoot while we have the good weather... So you go get changed and relax while you can tomorrow you start your fight choreography" you nodded receiving one last hug from Joey and a pat on the back from Henry as they turned moving to their next scene. The one you just filmed was a little further into the season then where they were up to but as they said they needed it for the trailer.

Henry took a breath he didn't want to leave you..Not yet he had only just spoke to you for the first time and for the next few days you wont see much of each other, he had a few night scenes that needed to be filmed...At night that meant he would be asleep for most of the day when you would be up and about set. Even if he did manage to drag himself out of bed he doubted he would see you, you would be busy he had your schedule...He had managed to wrangle one from of the offices had he said you'd lost yours? Maybe...But he was just excited he wanted to see when you'd both be around one another so he could prepare himself. He seemed to just be on egg shells, blundering his way through conversations and if he wasn't stammering and mixing his words he was fucking staring. He really had to get this attraction under control, preferably by having you on his arm.

That scene had been incredible for him, it was a flirtatious piece before boiling into sexual tension as he Geralt had followed the shifty witch about the banquet hall before confronting her over his suspicions. He sighed happily the grabbing and touching, pinning you it sent his  thoughts running wild, he loathed to admit it but his manhandling of you had...Really did it for him, which surprised him he has never been one for the rough and tumble outside of the bed room...or in it really sure he topped but nothing majorly rough a few slaps on the ass here and there and some dirty talk. But ...with you he could see himself experimenting you just shook him! He wanted to go all alpha on your ass!, claim his woman and all that jazz...He  just- around you he truly felt like a man's man you know? The whole 'me Tarzan you Jane' scenario wanting to sling you over his shoulder and take you back to his trailer and fuck the living daylights out of your tiny little pussy!....Fuck!

Having his current infatuation, his fantasy! Pinned and held still to the wall had really fucked him up. I mean what was so sexy about overpowering you with a single hand on your chest? crowding you with his form? leaning so close he could feel your sweet breath fanning his face Fuck me!...Everything, all of it was sexy! he felt powerful and dominant, like he was this big bear who could protect you from everything even yourself!

His only gripe was that he had to remain stoic and irritated as you flirted with him...God he wanted to flirt back let you know he wanted you in the most depraved of ways but that wasn't in the scene. Just remembering the way he had held you was already making him twitch in the tight bottoms of his costume.

It didn't take long to slip, for his imagination to cross over into delicious dangerous territory. He had felt it! The way your heart picked up as he leaned in closer with vaguely threatening words, the soft pants and gasps between your breaths the way your pupils had blown only to return to the sarcastic unamused gaze of keira. He had watched closely as your lips trembled you were quivering and he loved everysecond of it.

"Henryyyy~ oh god really what you do one scene with your precious Tink's and we loose you completely?!" Henry grunted at Joey as they made their way across set, they now needed to film a town scene.

"I'm fine Joey...Just thinking" he snorted at Henry walking around the larger man stopping him in his tracks

"Well don't hurt yourself" Henry rolled his eyes then peaked at the impish grin Joey had.

"So? Happy? I mean you did just get to cop a feel! And be paid to do it mind you!" Henry stopped and stuttered

"I-I did not!  I would never! Joey it was a scene! I didn't cop a feel!" Joey pulled a face unconvinced.

"Uhuh? So your script said 'grab her by the tits' and not 'grab her by the throat'?" Henry stopped 'what?, it fucking? Did ? Oh fuck whats she going to think? Is that why she was unprepared? You are such a fucking dick shes gonna think your a god damn pervert!'

"Hey hey woah! Henry stop slow down mate...I can see what your thinking but just back up...I was joking....Fuck ...That's it calm down she didn't seem to mind...see its fine" Henry calmed down but not by much.

"What the fuck? How am I? Whats she gonna think of me now?"

"Whats who gonna think of what?" Both men looked up as Anya approached readying herself for the shoot. Joey spoke up before Henry could stop him.

"Well you know Henry's little crush had her first shoot today?"

"I don't have a crush!" Anya chuckled at his blatant lie and patted his shoulder

"We know Henry..." she looked to Joey whilst rubbing Henry's back in reassuring circles and continued as he pouted.

"So Tink's is the one replacing whatsherface I thought it was just a rumor" Joey laughed as Henry heaved a sigh becoming a light pink colour.

"How does? We-I don't have a...Fuck it" Henry gave up resigning to the fact that everyone probably knew no matter how discrete he thought he was being. Anya sighed at the buff man.

"Henry you wouldn't shut up about her we all know..." Henry looked between them a little sheepish he couldn't help it. Joey cleared his throat.

"...yes well at one point Henry here had to pin her to a wall by her throat but instead decided to use her boobs to keep her still...and he has only just realized" Anya sighed

"Oh god you didn't? Really?...please tell me you didn't squeeze..." he full on blushed.

"NO! FUCK-I I did not squeeze...I didn't even notice not until Joey just brought it up...Its probably why she wasn't ready and banged her head, she thought I was going for her throat to push her back but instead I....Fuck sake!" Anya looked to Joey for the full story.

"He pushed her a little hard and her head hit the wall...I'm sure it was your strength that caught her off guard not your meaty palm squishing her tits..." Henry groaned running his hands over his face.

Anya sighed looking at him she could tell this was going to eat away at him.

"Look if she didn't say anything then she probably doesn't even realize...just play it by ear...if she does bring it up then apologize sincerely...All women love a gentleman" Henry sighed Anya was right the scene just naturally progressed you probably wouldn't have noticed, but he couldn't help feel bad he liked you he didn't want to blow it.

"But...but what if she hasn't said anything because shes scared of me" anya scoffed shaking her head.

"Seriously? You think shes afraid of you?" Henry furrowed his brow as she and joey laughed

"Well she must be! She always ran away from me! And couldn't look at me when she auditioned and today she had to hide behind Kal just to speak a few words to me!...I can understand I mean shes small and I'm a big guy then I fucking throw her about like that!? Shit shes never gonna go out with me if I fucking frighten her! Why the fuck are you two laughing I'm serious?!" Anya managed to stem her chuckles feeling bad for him, he honestly had no clue.

"Shes not scared Henry...Fuck really you haven't noticed?"

"Noticed what?!" Joey intercepted still chuckling, honestly it was like watching a fumbling preteen with a first crush.

"She likes you...A lot shes embarrassed" Henry frowned at them were they making fun of him? He shook his head getting irritated.

"No...she can't it doesn't make sense why would she run and be all..."

"Nervous and stuttering?like oh I font know a girl meeting her favorite celebrity? " Joey added Henry blinked what? You were a fan?

"There we go the penny has dropped!" Henry moved shifting on his feet flushing red

"She cant be-"

"She is Tee told me, shes a fan of yours Henry so she gets all shy" 'was that true? You liked him; his work so got flustered and avoided him? Fuck Cavill you dumb ass! That makes perfect sense! She hid because she was nervous, and she used Kal as a coping mechanism! She probably doesn't want to freak you out!' Henry smiled getting more confident if..if it was true then all he had to do was get you used to being around him, he could relax now knowing he didn't scare you just made you...what? Happy nervous? He was snapped out of his thoughts by Joey.

"Why don't you come along with us tomorrow...Invite her out for a late lunch? We can go as a group so technically its not a date but we can get her a few wines down her and loosen her up a bit and get her relaxed and you two can talk get to know her more!"Anya gasped

"Thats a brilliant idea we can say its because me and Freya want to meet her before our scenes together! A nice casual lunch and we can sit her next to you Henry!" Henry smiled...That was a good idea he could get to know you and not come on to strong as like a date. He nodded to Anya and Joey he would go and ask you after shooting today, suddenly he couldn't wait for tomorrow envisioning finally getting to have a real conversation with you and hopefully get you to relax around him.

You ran back to your trailer, luckily it took half the time to get out of costume then it did to get in. It only took an hour and you were finally y/n again and ready to chill like Tomasz said. You heaved a huge sigh once alone in your new home. You wanted to just go back to bed but your mind was reeling ,that had been incredible and terrifying all in one. 'But bitch you did it! Fuck yes!...And oh my god he touched you....Okay so it was for a scene so does it count?...Maybe, and he got you food! He fed you girl~...Well again not really,...Just coffee but still he thought of you? like he Ugh! How the fuck are you gonna survive this?!...Okay breath you didn't squeal....or scream or dry hump him....So today is going to go down as a win! But oh my fuck he was so strong~ like fuck he could one hundred percent rip you in half and your sorry ass would fucking drool over his muscles during and thank him after! And he was warm to...So warm and his smelt handsome...How the fuck can anyone smell handsome? You didnt know but fuck he did clean and masculine and just UGH!...Yes...Just yes girl so handsome and big and buff and....Fuck you wanted to just UGH!...Fuck...Just oh my god how are we gonna get through this with him being all growly and beefy...Okay something else....Kal, Kal is so cute and fluffy and big just like his daddy-NO! No no no stop it...Stop that right now!...He was hot though' you could still feel where he had placed his hand over your chest, the tingles he left it was ridiculous! His palm had been so hot...Like the rest of him so no real surprise...But fuck for you to feel it through the thick dress he must be hot...Which some how was more of a turn on you were wet...Like whet.

You cringed as you shifted feeling the arousal in your knickers making them stick to your outer lips it was uncomfortable, should probably take care of that.. you got up moving to the small toilet flicking off your knickers and blushed...Wow okay the man had definitely done a number on your libido...And you thought tumblr smut did you good but shit this was almost laughable. You rolled your eyes moving to the toilet wiping yourself down cleaning yourself up. It did no use you growled twitching and bucking into your hand as you moved as fast as you could trying not to fan the flames as brushing past your clit silently praying that this wouldn't be a regular thing after shoots. But you fucking doubt it! Seriously on set he was a huge growly built witcher...Who was also a frequent fantasy so yeah looks like your knickers were in for a rough ride. You whined trying to wipe away as much as you could feeling embarrassed as well as a little naughty, but to be honest you didn't feel to bad about it. Was that weird? besides if you hid it then it wont be a problem...A few months of sexual frustration wont be so bad...would it? Not like the man didn't know he was attractive so if he did ever see well...He wont blame you...would he?.

You mulled over these thoughts then quickly shook your head deciding some questions are better left unanswered. You looked down at into the toilet...If you continued to wipe yourself down you'd have a hell of a job explaining a clogged toilet...There was no dignified way of explaining a clogged toilet. So it was settled you needed a shower....A cold shower and clean knickers then a nap! sounds like a plan. On that thought, You poked your head out of the shower checking for a mini washing machine...Nada great so had to settle for just quickly rinsing them in the sink then hang them somewhere. You moved quickly pulling the cord and flipping on the switch letting the water to pour through the shower head.

You hissed as you stepped into the cubicle and the cool water hit your bare skin. You blinked looking at the damp knickers on the floor of the tiny room you shrugged and threw them on the floor of the shower giving them a quick blast washing away your own mess then kicked them out choosing to find a spot to dry them later. It was only when you stood below the stream of water that you realized just how flushed you was. Your heated skin protested to the water but soon it was comfortable and relaxing you closed your eyes trying to take a few zen moments under the cool spray willing away all your troubles.

Mainly the throbbing between your thighs it only lasted a few minuets before you got irritated huffing it wasn't working! you growled  having a quick wash hoping your arousal would settle on its own but soon you realized it wasn't going to happen and you needed to clean your still tremble core. You hissed bucking having to bite your own hand as you moved the shower head to the apex of your thighs. You whined as the light spray washed away your arousal pressing against your clit. You moaned as the cool water seemed to be just what you needed cooling the heated flesh and giving you incredible waves of pleasure vibrating along your nerves in slow tremors as good as it felt it was...not enough? It felt nice and nice just wasn't going to cut it! you grunted trying desperately to find that spot, that angle and rhythm that will take you to paradise but this shower was shit... Nothing like your expensive high power shower at home.

You whined widening your legs thighs shaking one hand was on the side of the tiny cubicle bracing yourself as you rocked and circled trying to chase a high that was slipping away as your frustration built. You hissed out throwing your head back moaning in disappointment trying to conjure an image, fantasy anything that would help but each time you latched onto one it was him and for some reason it felt...wrong and dirty. You gave up with a angry grunt quickly hooking the shower head back up and flipped it off. Getting out and wrapping a towel around you now in a sour mood. How the fuck was it easy to masturbate over him when you've never met him yet fucking difficult when you had met him... But surely it should be easier to get yourself there thinking of him, you had more to go on now. Maybe it was to do with the fact you had to face him now? either way it wasn't going to happen well not today anyway...Or was it?

It was then you decided to start going through tumblr...Probably not going to help but fuck you were desperate! you were horny and had to try, tumblr smut fics had never done you wrong before hopeful the writers would work their magic once more quickly scrolling through to your favorite smut fics and settling in the bed at the back of the bus. You moved crawling across the soft covers still wrapped in the huge bath sheet towel not caring that everything  was getting damp, if you had your way they'd be getting a lot wetter!

You flopped on your back pillows propping you up a little getting comfy you took a deep breath and spread your legs your tablet leaning on one bent leg, headphones next to you just in case a porn audio took your fancy. You started eyes scanning the words of a particularity juicy fic that you'd reread hundreds of times by this point you knew it almost word for word but still found yourself becoming turned on by the well written words, the slow build up that had you panting as you ghosted your fingers across your thighs slowly making their way to your mound, then bypassing making you shiver as you continued the journey up your soft tummy goose bumps raising along the flesh under your slight touches all the way to your chest leaving light tiny pinches on the underside of your breasts and circled your nipples letting the words sink in getting yourself ready for a promising orgasm.

You moved things along skipping a few paragraphs finding the hottest part of the chapter finally you moved two fingers to circle your tiny throbbing bud. Arching as your soft fingers rolled in small figure eights around the swollen flesh you rocked lightly and dug your toes into the covers below you trying to hold still and enjoy your body for whats its worth. Sighing you moved plucking at it from side to side pulling and tugging it this way and that as your walls began contracting wanting to be full, aching to a full body shuddering orgasm! The pleasure built faster then in the shower under your own skilled fingers and you grunted moving rocking faster. Half of you wanting to make this last, to enjoy the slow build up the other half just wanted this over, already done with this shit. You lowered your fingers leaving your clit to drift lower and rubbing your opening digging in your fingertips to give the muscles a massage treating yourself before diving right inside your arousal was coating you making it easier. You closed your eyes forgoing the fic now finding yourself able to have your own fantasy. Imagining another of Henry's characters somehow you could separate Henry from captain syverson which was a fucking god send at this point! then just as you were going to impale yourself on your own fingers and finally get your well deserved release. Then you heard it, your phone. It was like god himself doesn't want you to cum today.

Your head fell back an you kicked at the mattress having a quick paddy before wrapping your towl around you with a grunt and clambered out of bed to see who was cock blocking you. It was a good thing you got up to answer it as the tell tale 'mama' by scissor sisters blaring out signalling it was your mum and you'd be in deep shit is you ignored her. you took a deep breath and sat at the small table just by the door tugging the towel tight and answered.

"hi mum..you alright?"

"hey baby! how did it go? did you enjoy it? when can I see my baby girls perfomance? it was for the trailer wasn't it? tell me!!" you chuckled and leaned back she was really excited about all this, probably moreso then you.

"It was...It was fun I was nervouse but everyone said I did good...Didn't forget lines and stuff...Tomasz said the trailer will be out early in a few days so just keep your eye out on netflix but don't send it to me or tag me in it please...don't wanna see it yet"

"Tomasz? he is the....Bard?!" you laughed out loud shaking your head

"No director...Joey is the bard"

"So it was all okay? I'm glad I was so worried for you I tried not to call but I couldn't help it been sitting here all day worrying...And I may have...Well don't be mad!" you took a deep breath oh god what has she done!

"Mum..Mum what have you done?..You didn't tell anyone yet did you please tell me you've kept quiet!" she chuckled nervously

"Well...I may have accidentally let slip to...Well Casper? just a tiny bit...Teeny weeny bit" you froze she fucking what?! oh god oh god oh god! if Casper knows then the others probably will soon! you'd hoped to keep this away from the entourage of seriously over protective older brothers!

"MOTHER!? WHA-why? what the fuck? please tell me your joking?" she sighed

"oh I'm sorry love...But I was here alone worried...I really tried but he called and well he knew something was up and I just...it was an accident....I just needed someone to share the news with sweetheart! I'm sorry besides they will be happy for you! you know that they look out for you they just care..I'm sure it will be fine!" you grumbled down the phone to her making her sigh

"I am sorry it just slipped...I know they are...overwhelming and cocky and stubborn but they are your brothers and they love you, your their baby sister and they just want what's best for you" you sighed you knew that but they were all very over the top, fuck they are the reason your a virgin! no one would dare cross them! when you had your first kiss the poor soul was pulled off you and got a smack in the mouth since then everyone knew you were off limits. Not that your mother ever found out that little detail she thought you’d done the 'hanky panky' in secondary school like the rest of them.

"Yes I know...I suppose that was why you called to huh? to warn me?" you heard her click her tongue and hummed

"Well yes...He was happy for you, then he seemed to get antsy over the whole fame thing...And then when he realized you'd be working scenes with Geralt...Especially when he know you like the man...God for the life of me I can't remember his name! Hank-Harry?

""Henry"

"AH! yes that's it Henry the one you saw on tudors? and superman and fuck what else was he in? The spy one...fuck haha! you know its funny I should know this of by heart from all the squealing and what did you call it? fangirling? ..How has that been going by the way I'm assuming you were filming with him?" you hesitated a little

"I-err well we spoke a little this morning..From what Joey;the bard before you ask, said Henry had come to the make up early to try and make sure I didn't freak out to much...its why I stopped messaging you" she gasped

"Oh well that was nice of him...He is looking out for you then?"

"Yes to an extent...He got me coffee and was nice and he let me cuddle Kal! I sort of had really bad anxiety and kal-bear noticed so crawled into my lap...Henry let him and then Joey and Henry walked me to set...Well dragged me I ...I tried to run a little bit"

"Well thats good! You’ll need someone to help you...I guess you didn't have a screaming fit then?" you scoffed

"NO! what am I a child puh-lease I am an adult woman mother and I can handle a small crush!" she snorted at you

"I think not! you should remember who your talking to I know you inside and out! just..I know you like the idea of him but looks can be deceiving okay? just be careful there's a reason people say don't meet your idols y/n" you sighed

"I know mum...But I promise he has been nothing but a gentleman he is nice and is very supportive, he said so himself at the audition he will mentor me so I can learn on the job...I'm effectively his apprentice and I have everything under control...We wont see one another for a few days now any way...Got fight choreography for the next few days then some more fittings for other costumes then I will be on set filming more...Any way I best go...Gotta get some lunch havent eaten today yet...was to nervous...gonna chill for the rest of the day..Tomasz thinks the trailer will be done and out by tomorrow sometime so its going to get hectic"

"Okay love...If Casper calls just answer him if you avoid it you'll make him worse and he will call the others and you'll be bombarded with texts and calls...he might even call Kane....besides if you sort it out now alt least you wont have to face any of them for a while...not till you come here for filming...Or Christmas"

"Oh did they get the go ahead from brian?"

"Yes he signed a few weeks ago free reign over the woods and fells so you will be here filming I think it was for five weeks...Okay then I will let you go, take it easy be careful and I will call tomorrow okay? love you"

"Love you two mum speak tomorrow...not before eleven though!"

"Yes yes I know now go eat!"

"I will bye" you hung up and took a deep breath. shit. if Casper knew he was bound to have told one or two of the others. You got up from the table sliping on a sweater dress and some leggings before making your way over to the dining tent for lunch deciding you would feel better after some food.

Jesus Christ, it had already begun! the chefs were all over you like a bad rash, it seems everyone had now either heard you was the stand in or seen it. They were all happy said nice encouraging things..A few teased you playfully like Mathew who had been a bit of a... well you wouldn't say creeper but he didn't seem to realize that you wasn't interested, not that he asked you out but he...You knew he wanted to but no...Just no. He was nice but you didn't like him like that,  he made you super uncomfortable and not in a nervous crush type of way that Henry had. After nearly forty five minuets of a cringey conversation you finally wriggled away from him and took a seat at one of the huge tables half way through the now cold soup thanks to Mathew you got the call.

Your phone buzzed to life with your brother Casper’s face. Fuck sake!. you debated ignoring it but knowing him he would go all commanding officer on your ass and you just didn't need that. You slipped the phone in your hand.

"Hello Cas"

"What the fuck do you think your upto?!" you winced oh yes definitely his officer voice

"What do you mean? look I know mum told you and if your just going to yell at me then fuck off okay? they needed someone"

"Then they should find someone, but not my little fucking little sister...Your still a little baby"

"Don't call me baby alright? Jesus Cas I do have my own life you know? I can do what I want!" he scoffed you could feel him shaking his head

"But-but with him how the fuck? your going to get hurt sis you know that don't you? please please please tell them no, say something came up and you have to come home" you growled

"NO! ABSOLUTLY NOT!" you looked around seeing people stop and stare as you shouted down the phone to your over zealous brother.you quickly tucked your self into your shoulders.

"No I will not let them down! I signed the contract and I'm doing it! I'm keeping my word and you know what I am fucking enjoying myself! You know being an adult cos funny enough that's what I am...I thought you'd be happy for me?" he grunted

"I am happy for you! but I'm also worried, your about to be in the fucking spotlight y/n don't you see that? interviews, award shows the whole nine yards! and with no fucking preparation! no one in your corner!" you scoffed

"Oh thank so I'm on my own? because I haven't packed it in and come home like a good girl? is that what your saying? huh how dare I go and do something for myself by myself?!" he groaned and huffed down the phone you heard a thump he had obviously just hit something.

"That’s is not what I'm saying and you know it!  I always have you back just like the others you know that! I'm worried for you...I love you y/n...I don't want to see you crushed..The media are cruel and the fan base can be crueler...Please just tell me that you thought this through." you took a deep calming breath and nodded covering your eyes and leaned on your elbow on the table.

"I have...Tomasz and Lauren; the director and producer...They are releasing it in a way to let people know that if I hadn't stepped in then there would be no season two so that's one brownie point...And Henry and Joey are also on board helping me, they are mentoring me along the way and-" Casper hummed

"I'm also worried about him to...I don't want you caught up with him, I know what you think of him but he is still a man and they are only after-" you suddenly got very angry at what he was insinuating.

"Casper! Dont you fucking go there! I know bloody well what you fucking think? for fuck sake you and the others made damn sure I would die a fucking spinster, never had a fucking boyfriend cos of that stupid 'boys want one thing' bullshit at this point I wouldn't even know what to do with one! so just drop it!" he sighed it was something that all the brothers shared guilt over, they had isolated you, stopped you from having that first love and heartbreak now you were terrified of intimacy and the thought of needing someone in our life...

They knew it was their fault in some overprotective male bullshit they had basically given you a complex and ruined prospect of marriage and a family. They each regretted it and wanted to go back and change it but they can't. And it wasn't just boys they kept you away from girls to, ones they thought would lead you astray embarrassing you by showing up at teen parties and dragging you home kicking and screaming in front of your friends at eight at night trying to protect your virtue wanting what was best for you leaving you now a twenty seven year old virgin...Not by choice they had kicked the shit out of anyone who fucking blinked in your direction to this day you were still bitter about it and rightfully so.

They were out of line and should have known better, even your parents pulled them up and had many talks about it warning that they were going to give you a complex and issues later on but they never listened and there were to many of them for your mum and dad to really keep track and keep an eye on.

"Look Cas please just trust me I...If I'm going to make mistakes let me decide which ones to make okay? I'm happy and I'm going to be careful...I know you have my best interests at heart but at some point I've got to..." he sighed sadly he knew where you was coming from they had suffocated you growing up and now you were naive and that was their fault and just made them worry more and more becoming one huge nasty cycle. They want you to be happy and settle down but they still saw you as the baby sister who needed her knights in shinning Armour! And they wasn't ready to let anyone else be your hero.

"Please Casper...Just tell me your with me? That you think I can do it? I really need my family right now to just have my back" you closed your eyes feeling a huge weight on your back, you loved each and every one of your brothers and always wanted to make them proud but it was hard when your the baby of the family, you know they all mean well but...Well they are men and idiots fucking, children if your honest. You took a deep breath waiting to hear his reply.

"I've got your back Titch, always got your back and I trust you...And if-if you do get close to him and want to ...You know go for it....But same thing goes I don't care if he is a big star he fucking upsets you I will break his legs! Okay? Anyway enough of that...Don't need to think of you doing the nasty...So who you playing anyway? mum couldn't remember" you sighed in relief at least Cas would back you up when the others found out.

"keira...I'm playing keira...Did a shoot today its going to be in the trailer...Think they are releasing it tomorrow sometime so keep your eyes peeled..." you smiled you heard someone in the back ground say something ad Casper grunt and swear

"Whats wrong cas?"

"Fucking recruits locked in the boiler room...Fucking tit honestly how I'm going to manage this lot I don't have a clue...Think I should send them to Kane...He'd fucking make them shit themselves" you laughed as he mentioned your stoic eldest brother who had a bit of a reputation for being a hard ass...Well a hard ass with a stick up his ass. He was good in the army terrified the newbies, if at least one didn't piss himself on the first day then Kane wasn't doing his job right..

"Oh god your not loosing your touch are you?" he swore at you grumbling

"No I'm not you cheeky little shit!" you giggled at his remark knowing the teasing meant there was no hard feelings and continued.

"weelll I don't know...Didn't scare me on the phone earlier and if it was Kane well...Yeah Kane is Kane" he hummed in reply before carrying on in a sly voice

"Well that’s cos you think that your not gonna face me for a while but I’m on leave in two months...And you never know your only gonna be in London~" you faltered the smug grin dropped

"What the- how'd you know?" he chuckled

"Mum gave each of us your schedule from when you got the job with Tee she knew we'd want to know sooo I'm guessing that things are gonna be the same, your in Scotland now then home in sturry and the rest in London...Not that far any way I'm off take care, be safe and I will see you soon~" you groaned into the phone

"Okay then see you soon? Love you miss you already"

"Love you to Titch" he hung up and you sighed well...that wasn't so bad? was it? you smiled moving to clear up your bowl an exited the tent just missing the down trodden Henry who had just left the tent himself.

Henry was devastated after spending an hour or so hold up in his trailer sulking playing what he heard over and over again trying to work out who you were talking to he had lost hope. He had summarized  that you had a boyfriend. After not hearing from Henry for over an hour when he said he’d text, Joey decided to pop over and had sat and listened as Henry was explaining what he had just heard.

Henry was nearly in tears he wanted to shout he felt so? so? what hurt? he was upset and embarrassed he had made a fool of himself and for what? You had a boyfriend fuck knowing his luck a fucking husband!

"No I'm sure you heard wrong Henry Tee said she isn't seeing anyone" Henry growled

"Yeah well shes fucking wrong! I know what I heard Joey! they argued her and this 'CaSpEr' he didn't want her to be here! or or do anything by the sounds of it a right dick head...She popped off at him...From what she said he must have ordered her home...Fucking cunt!...What kind of a name is Casper any way sounds like a fucking prick! and then by the end 'LoVe YoU MiSs YoU AlReAdY' and they must be serious cos she was all like 'how I need my family around me' so he is already family I've got no chance Joey! The one girl that catches my eye after all this time and shes fucking taken! Fuck how could I be so stupid...You know I'm lucky I heard and didn't make a complete fool of myself and ask her to come out with us! god why can't things just fuck?...ugh!" Joey watched hesitantly he hadn't seen Henry like this before...kal was curled up smothering him and he looked crushed. Joey sighed and pulled out his phone texting Tee again explaining things.

"Casper? was that the name?" Henry nodded still furious with himself he lifted a hand up.

"What the-Joey what are you doing? look fucking leave it its done move on...She'd never like me for me anyway, They all just want a fucking superman!" Joey scoffed

"Always so fucking dramatic-AHAH! Henry you fucktard!...Wow okay fuck you know I'd leave it, fuck that..Shes a lost cause I say" Henry sat up sharply making Kal groan a jump down to the floor with an indignant huff.

"W-what did she reply? whats wrong?" Joey cleared his throat re reading the text

"Henry she has siblings...A lot of siblings"

"Yeah and I have a few siblings I don't see how thats relevant?"

"No your not with me Henry. She is the youngest of nine....Shes got eight older brothers Casper is one of them...She was talking to her brother who is in the army" Henry blinked..siblings? Oh....Well shit he didn't even think..But yes that would make sense..wow he fucked up, and lost a chance to get to know her by throwing a temper tantrum like a spoilt little boy.

"Her brother?..In the army that's why she said she misses him...That would explain....Shit I fucked up"

"Yes you did! royally! you know Anya and Freya are expecting her to show tomorrow and its like nine at night so you can't exactly go ask now you fucking twat....My god such a child hang on Mama Joey will fix this but you owe me!" Joey sighed and quickly started texting Tee Henry moved looking over the mans shoulder watching as he typed letting Tee know what they had planned she replied instantly agreeing with lots of winky faces and eggplant emojis?.

"There all sorted Tee will invite her out and we will all casually bump into one another...And for fuck sake find out her brothers names so we don't have this again! Jesus!" Henry looked down sheepishly now ashamed of his reaction, it wasn't like him to sulk or as his mum would put it 'throw his toys out of the pram' Henry leaned over hugging the singer tight

"Thank you Joey...I really do owe you....And sorry for the sulking and bitching...Just you know I really like her, and I want this to...I just got a feeling about her...I-I think she could be the one...Never got this wound tight over a woman before and...And I don't want to fuck this up!" Joey smiled and stood up.

"Well to late for that my friend however I am here to help you know that! so is Anya and Tee and Freya if Anya has anything to say about it, you'll be a couple by the end of filming I'm sure of it...Hell when the betting starts im putting money down!” henry rolled his eyes pushing Joey a bit he laughed then began again

“Look your half way there she is a fan, just gotta get her out of the whole 'Henry Cavill movie star' mind set down to a more intimate 'Henry Cavill my sexy colleague who I want to fuck-OUCH FUCK! HE-HENRY! H-HEY NO PITCHING!" Henry laughed it was true he just had to get over the initial 'oh my god its superman' then things will be easier to manage...if he can control his own nerves that is. Henry gave Joey on final hug as the singer left thanking him and closed the door resting his back on the door taking a deep breath then jumpers the three steps up to the 'living area' and fist pumped the air having a little moment.

"Fucking Get In!! did you see that Kal!?! Daddy has a date with Tinks!!! hey you hear me buddy? tinks and daddy are having lunch!!...Okay well not a date but we are having lunch....Fuck...What should I wear boy?....cant go to dressed up...but sweats are...no....Shit! Kal son I've got fuck all to wear...I DIDN'T PREPARE FOR THIS!!"  Kal barely batted and eye lid at his human as he ran to the closet in a panic ripping through his clothes wanting to find something suitable. Kal yawned and looked to the huge bed in the back of the home away from home and huffed, Henry would be at this all night fussing over matching his body wash shampoo and conditioner scent and after shave...Not that he can shave but a bit of smelly never hurt to entice the ladies.

"Kal?KAL?! Coconut or Lynx Africa?!" Kal  blinked and turned on the spot and stretched yawning slowly away from Henry making the man sigh. With one huge leap Kal landed on the empty bed, if Henry wasn't going to use it then its no use letting the comfy spot go to waste, the Akita made a loud snort as he flopped down closing his eyes, when Henry got like this Kal just tried to ignore him, the human would tire himself out eventually until then Kal would get some shut eye. he peeked one last time seeing his dad who scrabbled about yanking out clothes sniffing them to see if they were clean or not, he shrugged digging through the tops he swore he packed a dark blue button up! and he was determined to find it even if it took all night!

#henry cavill x reader #henry cavill imagine #henry cavill #henry cavill fanfiction #henry cavill fic #henry cavill x y/n #henry cavill x you #geralt of rivia #geralt x reader #geralt x y/n

[krreader]

swim | chapter 3.

pairing: min yoongi x reader fandom: bts warnings: non idol!au ; sex shop!au ; college!au ; language ; masturbation genre: smut ; angst ; crack ; fluff previous: 1 ; 2

summary: what he wanted was someone he could have casual sex with. what he got, was a co-worker that he wanted much more from.

a/n: I literally posted part 2 and had to write part 3 the same day, even if it’s probably been a while since I uploaded part 2 and this will be sitting in my drafts for a while but omg, so inspired rn hahaha. hope you like it! - editing update: I was correct, it has been sitting in my drafts for a while lol(masterlist is in my description box)

“Hey Yoongi,” a regular walked up to the cash desk where Yoongi was currently sitting, texting someone on his phone, “Where's the pretty girl that works here now?”

“What's it to you?” he replied, not looking up, but continuing to type instead.

“Well.. it's just.. I heard she's really beautiful and I wanted to see her.”

“To do what exactly? She's not exactly your age, you know?” finally he looked up, his stare cold as ice, “So don't bother flirting with her,” his voice wasn’t angry, just filled with the right amount of threat for the guy not to try anything with you.

That was exactly the moment that your cheerful voice echoed through the store, a smile as bright as the sun itself on your face as you greeted Yoongi happily, “Hey! I brought you coffee!”

His heart skipped a beat at that. The fact that you cared enough about him to get him coffee in the morning.. and here he had been at first, completely against the idea of having a co-worker.

“Thanks,” after he had made sure that the guy was far enough away from you, he was able to relax and smile at you, “How was your day?”

“Oh, you know.. uni. Nothing exciting. How was yours?”

“Yeah, same,” he nodded, taking a sip from his coffee and looking back down to his phone when he got another new message.

And you knew it wasn't your business because you had only just started working here and Yoongi and you literally knew nothing about each other, but it was both curiosity and maybe even a bit of jealousy that made you ask: “Your girlfriend?”

“Girlfriend? No. No girlfriend.”

“Oh,” you had to bite down on your tongue to stop yourself from smiling.

It was good to know. Not that you thought about flirting with him or something like that, but.. you know..

However, what he didn't tell you was that the girl he was texting was someone he met on Tinder.

He doubted you'd be thrilled to know that he just scored a sex date tonight and it wasn't exactly something he wanted you to know in your first week of working here - or ever, to be honest -, so he decided to turn off his phone instead and give you his full attention.

“So.. a few new porn movies came in earlier. You could sort through them and put them in the racks if you want to?”

“Sure, I can do that,” you smiled with a nod and walked into the back of the store to get the porn movies that he mentioned.

And as soon as you were gone, the customer from before returned to Yoongi and said: “She's drop dead gorgeous.”

“And too young for you, for the second fucking time. Now buy what you want to buy or leave. I don't want you lurking around here and staring at her weirdly. Got it?”

It almost sounded like he was a protective boyfriend now.

God, why was he looking out for you so much? And why was it so important to him that you were always safe and that other guys didn't look at you weirdly?

Did all male co-workers do that for their female colleagues? Probably, right? It was normal..

You did what Yoongi had asked you to do and actually spent almost an hour on sorting through the movies. You'd be surprised how many new porn movies came out a day.

After that was done, you decided to fold the lingerie nicely again.

Truth be told, some of these things were actually really cute.

And if you had a boyfriend – or a sex life – you might lean towards wearing some of these, you thought as you picked one up and stared at it with a smile.

Yoongi quickly averted his eyes and shook his head, trying not to think about what you would look like if you wore one of these.. while you were teasing.. him.

Fuck, stop thinking about it, you have a date tonight. Focus on your date, don't focus on her.

He turned on his phone again and decided to sext the other girl in hopef of getting his mind off you, while customers were occasionally coming to him to pay for things. It distracted him slightly. Not enough to fully get the picture out of his head, but enough for him not to run around with a boner when he got up from the cash desk and helped you with a box full of new toys.

“Why are these so heavy?” you asked, completely out of breath.

“It's the fists.”

“The fists? Fists for what?”

“Well.. fisting.”

Here's a pro tip. If you're a virgin, don't know shit about sex and are a shy mess when it comes to kinks? Don't work at a fucking sex shop.

You immediately panicked and took a step back, letting go of the box, so that all of the 'fists' fell out.

Luckily no customers were around to witness it and Yoongi thought it was rather funny.

“I take it that's not up in your to-do list, then?” he crouched down and started picking them up one by one again, placing them back into the box.

“People.. they.. but.. where? And how?”

“You really don't know?” he furrowed his eyebrows and cocked his head to the side, “I thought people that worked here needed to be kinky.”

Oh wow. Here we go.

You instantly looked away, a blush spreading from your cheeks, to your neck, all the way down to your chest.

“I.. well.. it's, you know.. complicated.”

“How so?” he asked, his voice not filled with judgment, but with interest, “Are you a virgin, or something?” Yoongi laughed, as if he wasn't quite believing it himself. But when you didn't answer and only stared at your feet, his eyes widened and he shot up straight like a bullet, “Hold on.. seriously?”

“It's not a big deal, you know? A lot of girls my age are and.. I know that most of them don't say it, but well.. they are,” you pretty much tumbled over your words, thinking Yoongi would laugh at you.

But he didn't.

There was this wildly spread misconception that guys didn't like it when girls were still virgins. That they thought it was embarrassing and pathetic, when in reality, most men actually did like it.

Not just the fact that if they became your boyfriend, they'd have the privilege to be your first, but because it meant that you respected your body enough not to just sleep with a guy for the first time because everyone else wasn't a virgin anymore. It meant that you were smarter than most girls who did it just so the status of 'virgin' would be gone.

“You don't have to defend yourself for it, you know? I was just surprised..”

“Why?” you asked, your voice an octave higher.

“Well, I told you before that you're really attractive and I don't know if you've ever had a boyfriend, but.. if you didn't, then the guys you hang out with are absolutely stupid not to see what a great girl you are.”

The corners of your mouth curled into a smile as you finally looked back up at him, “You think so?”

“Yeah. Personally, I think it's great that you are. It just means you're waiting for the right person or don't want to just randomly sleep with someone to not be a 'virgin' anymore. I like that. Makes you an even cooler person, in my mind.”

Yeah, and you know what else it did? It made his fucking heart swell in his chest.

And that was a fucking issue.

How come this just added to the list of reasons why he liked you more than he should? The idea that you were still 'pure' and that if he was ever lucky enough to be with you, he might be the first to touch you and..- god he should really stop thinking about this.

“Thank you. Really,” you had been so insecure about it for so long. But to hear someone like him say something like that.. it felt good, really. It made you see that no, not everything is about sex.

“How about you let me handle the fists and you do the cash register in the meantime? I think most people just want to buy porn or lingerie for now anyways.”

“Yeah,” you scratched the back of your head, “I think that'd be good.”

You'd probably get accustomed to it eventually. You had to. But for now, it was probably the better decision to let him deal with the hardcore toys.

“Hey!” Yoongi walked into the living room of his frat house, all of his members currently drinking and enjoying themselves, “I told you to get lost, I'm bringing a girl over and I don't want you people sitting here like losers and drinking beer. I want her to at least think that we're one of the cool fraternities.”

“Oooooh, hyung is finally going to get laaaaid,” Taehyung laughed as he got up, clapping him on the shoulder as he ran past him into his room.

The others soon followed, all laughing and clapping him on the shoulder as well.

All but Hoseok.

“How's (Y/N)?”

“Seriously? You want to talk about her now? When my date comes around any second?”

“Yeah, why not,” he shrugged, crossing his arms in front of his chest, “You came home today smiling like an idiot. I think it was because of her.. am I right?”

“Hoseok, I'm not letting you ruin my sex night by talking about my co-worker. So do yourself and me a favor and go.”

“A tinder date versus our pretty co-worker.. and you go for the tinder date,” Hoseok sighed as he walked towards the stairs, “You're falling lower and lower, my friend.”

He knew that.

And if he wasn't so goddamn horny and needed to fuck someone hard against a wall right now, he would have taken the effort to really get to know you.

Actually, he still might do that.

But now that he also knew you were a virgin, he knew that if he actually did end up dating you – for whatever reason – he'd have to wait even longer for sex.

And he just really needed it now.

With one final glance in the mirror and a bit more perfume on his neck, he walked over to the door and let his date in.

She was as pretty as she was on her profile picture, had dressed up nicely enough, but then again, both of you knew why she was really here, so she had worn something that would be easy to take off.

Still, he didn't want to be rude.

He invited her into the living room and turned on the TV, both of them talking for the first hour, until he slid closer and closer.

And then they were finally making out, Yoongi pulling her onto his lap as she began to move back and forth on his already hard penis.

He let out a breathy moan, the girl grinning as she leaned down to his ear.

“Bedroom?”

Oh god, how long he had waited for someone to say that to him again.

Yoongi didn't wait for another invitation, he grabbed her ass and picked her up, carrying her into his bedroom and falling onto the bed with her.

After that everything became a little blurry.

He remembered clothes being taken off, remembered fingering her and then all he could remember as his eyes were closed and she was sucking him off was..

“(Y/N),” he moaned, his hands in your hair.

No.

Her hair.

“(Y/N)?” she asked, immediately sitting up, “What the fuck did you just say?”

“I.. I said..-”

“I'm giving you a blowjob and you think about another girl? Dude, what the fuck?!”

“No, wait, I didn't..-” but she was already getting dressed again.

And he didn't even have one freaking orgasm.

And a moment later, he could hear her slam the front door closed and he was left lying on his bed with his hard penis flat against his stomach and him staring up at the ceiling of his room.

“I fucking hate my life,” he whispered to himself, as he wrapped his hand around his shaft once again.

#bts imagine #bts x reader #min yoongi x reader #suga x reader #min yoongi imagine #yoongi imagine #yoongi x reader #suga imagine #bangtan boys #bts #bangtan sonyeondan #min yoongi #suga #yoongi #reader #mine

[thedarkenedkeeper]

Glitched: Part 10 - Always Watching

Author’s Note: Holy hell, was this insane to write X_X

A few things. Firstly, I apologize for how long it took for this to come out. I was incredibly anxious about school, plus I was just overly struggling with writing this chapter. I had a general idea of what I wanted to happen, but I didn’t really know how to get it down into words.

Secondly, this came out as about 18 pages long in Word so I apologize for how ridiculously long this is! I didn’t think it was going to come out so damn long!

And thirdly, this chapter is heavy on the angst. There’s a little bit of horror – of course – but this chapter is mainly angst-ridden so prepare for a LOT of feels! For Christ’s sake, I CRIED while writing this, so that should be saying something.

WARNING: This chapter is very heavy and is incredibly dark. There are mentions of suicide, abuse (both physical and mental), bullying (mainly cyberbullying), existential crisis, self-mutilation, and incredibly low self-esteem. There are mentions of a character getting lobotomized. There is a scene with a detailed description of the inside of a character’s back, which contains abnormal anatomy.

I will say this and I will say this one: This is NOT a happy fun time chapter! (I know, the story as a whole isn’t happy, but this chapter is VERY heavy on the angst as opposed to the other chapters) There ARE feels.

You have been warned.

Enjoy!

(I am SO sorry. I feel so bad for writing this! ;^;)

Listen to this playlist while reading.

 Wheezing breaths of agony echoed throughout the room as he operated. Warm sticky crimson spurted onto his naked lanky fingers – the very fingers of which were maneuvering the stainless steel instrument through his patient’s skull. A pained gasp expelled from the man upon the bloodied table.

“Oh be quiet.” The glitching entity hissed with agitation. “Stop your whining.” He scoffed. “You act as though you’ve never felt pain before.” A delighted giggle came ringing out of the creature’s slit throat. “Almost like you’re afraid of dying.”

A quivering whimper could faintly be heard coming from his patient as he fiddled with the orbitoclast. The green-haired demon smirked from behind his surgical mask.

“I must say, Herr Doktor,” He said in a horrible German accent, mocking the man, “you should be proud of me. I’m no doctor, but I seem to be doing an impeccable job here, if I do say so myself.” He bragged, his smirk stretching into a twisted smile.

The ice pick sank in further, a trail of blood running out onto the demon’s fingertips. A sharp intake of air, followed by a shaky sob left the patient; the entire mass of flesh jolting and tensing up against his restraints. The overhead light flickered as the sinister being growled through his teeth out of annoyance.

“For fuck sake, stop it! This is delicate work – you of all people should know that!” He snapped sharply, though he ironically gave the pick a violent tap; jabbing the inside of the man’s skull.

It only made the tortured man release a loud moan of unbearable agony, a trembling hand pulling weakly at its bond and trying to reach out for the figure leering over him. After a brief moment, the struggling died down and a faint shaky whine slipped out. The demon chuckled, continuing with his ministrations.

“You see? That wasn’t so hard, now was it? I told you that you could handle the pain.” The creature’s head gave a sudden twitch to the left, then the right, before returning his cold eyes to his patient. He grinned. “If I can bear with it, so can you. Anesthesia is fOr ThE wEaK!” In seconds flat, the entity’s form glitched out spastically; the grin gone and replaced with a grimace of anger, trying to make a point. Almost as quick as it had happened, the toothy smile returned, accompanied with a horrifying cackle of glee.

Another weak whine left the pained patient.

“Trust me, my friend, zhis is for your own good.” The manifestation grinned mockingly, using the exact same words the doctor had said to him when he had been operated on back on October 29th.  “Don’t worry, I’m going to fix you right up.” He expelled a useless breath, a smirk tugging at the corner of his lips. He chuckled lightly before his being glitched out; his facial expression almost immediately falling flat. “I’m going to fix you all.” He hissed softly under his breath.

The poor man upon the table suddenly jerked, a strained gasp of pain getting ripped out of his vocal cords. Anti growled, put off with how uncooperative his patient was being.

“Oh come on, give it a rest already! Get ahold of yourself! You’re not dying!” He mumbled the next few words with promise. “Not yet anyway, but I don’t get to choose the outcome. You should be so lucky.” He wedged the pick in further, showing no remorse towards the man when he writhed and released a choked breath.

As the twisted imposter of a doctor carried on with the operation, getting blood smeared all along his pale digits, he began to yet again find himself slowly but surely sinking into the hatred he held towards the community. No one knew how he felt, not truly anyway. Everyone automatically assumed the unstable creature was just a monster, and as such, he behaved like one. But he was only like that thanks to his creators – they were the ones who gave him life and made him what he was. If they hadn’t wanted a monster, then why hadn’t they done anything to “fix” him? Why hadn’t they taken action when they had had the chance? Anti stared down at his handy work, dark eyes unblinking as the anger started to weave throughout his veins.

“They’re making me do this. They would say otherwise, I know they would. They’re all deceivers – monsters like me, although much worse.” An insidious giggle rang throughout the operating room, sending cold chills down his patient’s spine. “They don’t give a shit about any of us. They can’t seem to make up their damn minds on anything.” He chuckled, although given what he was talking about, it was an incredibly unnerving chuckle. There was nothing but fury and hate behind it. “And they have the audacity to go and point fingers at me and call ME the monster, the true villain in all of this? HA!” He jabbed the orbitoclast rather unexpectedly, instantly getting a horrific reaction out of his tortured patient. He glowered down at the man, his abyssal orbs growing darker and colder than what was already possible.

“They have no idea what they’ve done to me.”

                                                           * * * * *

  It was not long after Halloween when the demon had begun to notice the changes in his audience. After Anti had “killed” Jack in front of the still recording camera and finally took possession of the Irishman’s body, the glitching entity just had to go and upload the footage to YouTube two days later. After all, Jack himself had wanted to make a Halloween video for the fans; he had even teased them about it with the brief recording he had posted on Instagram. As Anti saw it, he was doing the man a favour. And of course, just as he had expected, after that video was released, the entire community went up in flames. Everyone freaked out – both out of equal amounts of delight and fear. Many actually believed Jack had in fact died and that Anti had taken over, and the insidious manifestation could only laugh out of amusement, applauding those few who knew the truth. He had been so gleeful to see his creators’ reactions, taking in just how shell-shocked they each became and how they all screamed his name. It was almost a surreal experience; the demon couldn’t quite contain his happiness.

However, though he was now the one in control, he knew his fans were going to suspect that he was the one inhabiting Jack’s body. And though that was true, he figured he’d have a bit of fun with them all. He would instead put on a deceitful act and pretend to be everyone’s favorite green-haired Irishman. It was time for him to put all of the training he had done over the past couple of months to good use. He would wear a mask and act like nothing had happened, and that’s exactly what he did.

A delayed video was posted hours later of him explaining what had happened during October leading up to Halloween. The glitch definitely put on a seamless act. The way he spoke, the way he acted, the joy and optimism and excitement gleaming in his blue eyes, the positivity radiating off of the man – it was all far too perfect. There wasn’t any way anyone would conclude it wasn’t Jack speaking in front of the camera. The unhinged trickster came up with a convincing lie off the top of his head, telling his audience how everything had just been one big act for Halloween. Anti wasn’t real, it was just Jack pretending to be an evil demented version of himself out to kill him. It was all just a scary idea he had had for the Halloween season – he wasn’t dead.

And the fandom believed him. They fell for his two-faced lies, each individual word sliding off of his wicked tongue and twisting his creators’ beliefs. They had all bought into his seemingly innocent fable. Some were confused, some didn’t know what to believe anymore, but all of them knew deep down that Jack was perfectly fine and he was only embracing the character of Anti…right?

For a time, the glitching entity had been very pleased with his ways of deception, how he managed to warp every single member of the community into believing he was in fact everyone’s good ol’ Jackaboy…that was until he began to take notice of how little attention he himself was receiving.

Sure, after his appearance on Halloween, a ton of fan art, fanfiction, and posts about him had been produced. There was no denying the fact how all of it had given him immense strength and power. However, given how he was pretending to be someone he wasn’t – someone the entire fandom had adored – he realized with a horrendous hybrid of surprise and perplexity that the community was once again returning there attention onto Jack. They all seemed to be relieved at the fact that he was alright and unharmed, that he hadn’t actually died. They were grateful he was alive, and Anti didn’t understand why. Hadn’t they wanted him to cut the man out of the picture? Hadn’t they wanted him to replace the pathetic Irishman and give them a far more superior being to look up to?

As the months passed away and autumn faded into winter, the demented creature began to truly notice the difference in the community’s behavior. He was slowly but surely becoming forgotten by his own creators. Granted, there were still pieces of fan art and fanfiction floating about here and there on social media, but other than that, their main focus was no longer on him; it had been shifted back onto Jack and it appeared to be staying that way. And though he tried to convince himself otherwise, Anti firmly believed that his fans only thought of him as a one-time thing – that he had had his one chance to steal the limelight and now that it had passed, it was time to move on. And the demon was not at all pleased with this.

The minute he had noticed the change in the fandom, Anti had stormed off into the darkened hell where he kept his host caged up and went off on a long-winded rant about just how confused and enraged he was for suddenly being ignored and accused of being a “one-time thing”.

“What? A ‘one-time thing’?” The green-haired Irishman had questioned from behind the searing-hot bars of the cell. He shook his head slowly, not entirely understanding. His alter ego was speaking so quickly, he could barely keep up. “I don’t understand.”

“What’s there to not understand? They see me as a one-time thing! A side-show act!” The manifestation snapped with a glitch of his head.

“Well what did you expect? You’ve been pretending to be me all this time.” Jack stated simply. “They think I’m perfectly fine and that it was all just an act. They don’t really think you exist, and you’ve made them believe that.”

“Shut up! They know I exist, I know they do!” His body spasmed for a fleeting moment as he paced the room. “And yet…” He chuckled lightly in disbelief, “And yet, they’re acting like nothing had happened. Like everything that had led up to Halloween – all of my sudden appearances – meant nothing.” He whirled around and locked his eyes onto the man in the cage. “It’s almost like they’ve forgotten about me completely.” He scoffed, a petite smile flashing across his face in the blink of an eye. “They haven’t forgotten about me completely, thank fuck for that. But…But they’re my creators, damn it!” He flared, his entire form twitching and jerking, struggling to remain stable. “They created me, they brought me to life, and I gave them a show! So why aren’t they giving me attention?”

With no warning, one moment he was a few feet away from the cell and the next, he was suddenly standing right in front of the bars, slamming his hands against them with a violent bang. Jack’s heart nearly jumped out of his chest at the action, stumbling backward and nearly catching himself off balance. Anti’s glacial cold orbs bored deep into the Irishman’s soul, hissing harshly through his teeth.

 “Why do they like you more than me?!” He demanded, fingers tightening around the bars.

Collecting himself and swallowing down any fear he held towards the creature, Jack straightened up and broadened his shoulders. He refused to show any fear or let Anti have the upper hand in this. He glared at the entity from the other side of the bars, his hands balling up into fists at his sides.

“Maybe it’s because I’m not a monster.” The Irishman seethed. “Maybe it’s because I’m not so desperate for attention that I’ve resorted to hurting or killing anyone. Maybe it’s because I actually have a heart and give a damn about the community as a whole as opposed to being a selfish asshole who only cares about their self.” He spat. “Whether they created you or not, it doesn’t matter. You have control over your actions – you can change your ways – and yet you decide not to. You instead choose to be a wretched monster that’s out to cause carnage and misfortunate for others.”

Jack took a few slow steps forward, his eyes never leaving the insidious being staring back at him. He shook his head, scowling at the demon with a look of disgust.

“You haven’t changed…and you never will.”

Anti felt a pang in his chest at hearing what his counterpart said. He growled in anger, his head twitching violently from left to right as a projection of himself flickered, one of him yanking viciously on his hair with his face scrunched up in frustration as opposed to agony. He cocked his head to the side in an unnatural way, reminiscent of the movement of a small bird’s own head. A layered inhuman giggle came bubbling out of his forever blood-gushing throat.

“You think I can change my ways? You honestly think I can change?” A terribly awful laugh erupted from him, succeeding in striking a descent amount of fear into his prisoner. He shook his head vigorously, a grin plastered on his face, even though it was plainly obvious he wasn’t happy. Admittedly, it unnerved the Irishman to a degree.

“Your ‘precious’ community holds the power over me. They are the ones who made me the way I am. I didn’t get a say in the matter! Hell, I didn’t ask to be made. I DiDn’T aSk tO Be GiVEn LiFe!” He unexpectedly lashed out, the grin vanishing from his face in an instant and an animalistic-looking grimace taking its place. His body seemed to stutter and lag for a moment before resuming its movement, twitching and glitching out every few seconds. It was evident the creature was having a hard time controlling his anger.

Jack jumped back in alarm, having not expected the sudden outburst. However, though it had momentarily startled him, the YouTuber still stood his ground. Before he could even think over the situation and come up with a calm and collected solution like he would normally do, he found himself consumed by an overwhelming wave of rage, and the next few words came flooding out of his mouth – words he would later regret ever saying.

“Well if you don’t want to be alive, then why don’t you kill yourself?!” He snapped, glaring daggers at the entity.

Another pang came from within the glitch’s chest, and this one hurt far more than the previous one.

“You keep complaining about how you were created and how everyone is ignoring you and not giving you attention. You’re like a child – a whiny brat who can’t get what they want when they want it, and it’s just sad.” The Irishman continued, not holding back. “You say that the community is responsible for you – that they’re the ones who created you and brought you into this world. And even though they’re essentially like your parents, they don’t seem to care about you.” He leaned forward. “Did it ever cross your mind that maybe the reason they don’t care about you is because of the way you came out?”

Yet again, another painful pang.

“Maybe you were meant to only be an idea, NOT an actual existing creature.” He hissed. “You’re like Frankenstein’s monster – you were pieced together from scratch. Maybe you were meant to come out differently, but instead, came out as this…this thing.” He said with such distaste, the entity visibly winced. Jack kept his eyes fixed on his alter ego, nothing but anger in his eyes, and yet...there was something else there also. Unfortunately, Anti was unable to see it.

“An abomination…That’s what you are.” The man shook his head slowly. “You’re an abomination…and nobody wants you.” His nostrils flared as he took in a sharp breath, trying to keep his hatred at bay. He scoffed. “You know…I’m known for being a reasonable guy. I like to think that I am caring, I can see the good in people, and that I can and will accept anyone for who they are, no matter what their race, gender, sexual orientation – I don’t give a fuck.” He spat. “And over the last two months, I had really thought that maybe – just maybe – that all of this would come to an end.” He was saying it with such sincerity, like he had genuinely hoped things would’ve changed. “That maybe there was some good in you, and you would let me go, and everything could go back to normal. I was willing to accept you for who you are, but now…”

He trailed off, bowing his head and glancing down at the concrete ground, shaking his head. “I was a fool for ever thinking that way…There is no good in you, I finally see that...” He lifted his head and locked eyes with Anti, tugging on his chains as he took a step forward. “You were never meant to exist, Anti. You’re a mistake, and THAT is why they don’t care about you. You weren’t planned. Get that through your head.”

A raw, dead silence came without welcome. The unhinged creature stood there, unblinking eyes staring directly at his host, but the anger he had been feeling – the countless questions that had been tormenting him – all of it seemed to dissipate at hearing what the green-haired man had to say. Never had the demon heard such cold, harsh words leave the man’s lips. Jack had always been known as a pure caring soul, one who rarely ever looked down on anyone unless there was an honest-to-God good enough reason. And for the last two months, the Irishman had tried to see past the glitch’s monstrous exterior. With each day, he had hoped and prayed for the day the demon would come into the room and release him, claiming it to be one big misunderstanding. But that day never came. Time and time again, Anti had been merciless and took great joy in taunting the YouTuber, not at all caring for his feelings. He thoroughly enjoyed seeing his prisoner in a helpless state. And as much as he wanted to believe otherwise, Jack finally opened his eyes to the truth: Anti was a monster and that’s all he’d ever be – there wasn’t an ounce of good in him.

Anti stood there unmoving, the glitchiness of his body faltering and ever so slightly managing to calm down a bit. It may have been hard to tell, but through Jack’s eyes, it almost appeared like the entity’s facial expression had dropped. His body may have been tense and he may have been gripping the bars tightly, but his eyes…there wasn’t a sliver of anger anymore, nor was there perplexity. Those feelings were gone, and in their place, something else took over – something much more haunting. His eyes seemed much darker, but not from the ugly emotions he’d been consumed by a moment ago.

No…this was something else entirely…

If the Irishman didn’t know better, he could’ve sworn he was staring into the eyes of a damaged creature. The body language may have made Anti give off the appearance of a deadly predator ready to go in for the kill, but his eyes were a different story. Jack felt like he was staring into the soul of a wounded animal, and for a brief moment, he almost pitied him.

Nevertheless, within seconds flat, the hurt he’d seen fogging up the demon’s onyx orbs cleared away and the fury he’d had before returned with a cruel vengeance; a feral growl crawling out of the creature’s throat. Anti shook his head, his form beginning to twitch and jerk violently once again. Versions of him flickered every few seconds, one or two of him grinning sadistically and cackling wildly.

“No…You’re wrong. They do care about me deep down – they must!” He unexpectedly giggled with an unnerving amount of glee. He shrugged, extending his arms out to either side. “Why else would they have created me?” He pointed an accusing finger out at the Irishman. “I know what you’re doing. You’re trying to test me – see if I have any ‘feelings’.” The abomination said it as though it was a repulsing concept. “Nice try there, Jackie but it ain’t going to work.” His body spasmed momentarily before he leaned forward, pressing his forehead against the bars of the cell. A horrible toothy grin spread from ear to ear across his face.

 “Mark my words, Jackaboy, I’m going to prove you wrong about your ‘loving’ community.” He giggled darkly, lines of pixels scattering across his face at a blurring speed to reveal an expression of pure unadulterated hatred and loathing. His voice dropped an octave or two as he glared at his host.

 “I’m going to give them a reminder of who’s really been around all this time. Then, and only then, will they open their eyes and see.” And without another word, he pushed himself away from the bars, whirled on his heel, and exited the room.

That had been back in early January.

Throughout January and February, the community’s creation continued to play the part of everyone’s favorite green bean; seamlessly pretending to be someone he wasn’t just to please his fans. However, it wasn’t until he began to play a horror game titled “Detention” when things began to take an unexpected turn of events. Unknowingly to the glitch, every couple of minutes into each video, the facecam would suddenly act out of sorts and someone would appear on screen for a second or two, most often looking directly at the camera with confusion, distress, or sometimes even fear. Unfortunately, Anti hadn’t found out about any of this until the videos had been uploaded and he was furious when he discovered what was going on. Without him knowing, Jack had been making energy-consuming attempts at trying to reach out to his audience and show them that he wasn’t the one in control. He was desperately trying to get the community’s attention, and though he succeeded, it only managed to raise a lot of questions amongst the fans. Glitches were associated with Anti, and thus, a majority of the fandom were convinced that Anti was coming back – even though, in truth, he had never left. No one could decipher whether the man shown in the glitches was Anti or Jack, and it was only frustrating both of the green-haired men.

Shortly after he had brought “Detention” to a close, Anti had gone and subjected his pathetic host to a relentless amount of pain. He had strangled him and beaten him into submission, all while venting out his unbridled rage until the man was a quivering mess at his feet, begging to be let go. It was at this point when Anti knew he had to take action, he had to do something to get the community’s attention back onto him – the REAL him. But how? What could he possibly do? It’d have to be bigger than what had happened on Halloween. Something that everyone could see, something that would never be forgotten, something –

And then it hit him like an oncoming truck: PAX. He knew that Jack attended the convention every year; taking the time to meet his fans in person and giving them all a time to remember. The next one was supposed to be coming up in three weeks, and it only made a grin come to the demon’s face. That was it – that’s how he’d get everyone’s attention once again. What better a way to give his makers a reminder than while at a live event?

Leading up to the weekend of PAX, the entity had gone through the trouble of putting together an introductory video for his panel. For the first minute or so of the video, he pretended to be Jack; welcoming everyone to the panel, only to then announce how he had an idea – a game – that he wanted to try out with the audience. He then proceeded to explain himself, stating how they were all going to record a message of sorts using a phone, a camera, or an iPad. The entire thing seemed innocent enough; there was no need to be suspicious of his behavior. Jack was the one speaking after all, and who wouldn’t trust the precious bean? Surely he had something exciting planned. Everything was going well until it wasn’t. The screen would start to glitch out, some of the audio would cut out or become laced with static – clear signs that something was very wrong and that “Jack” wasn’t so alone. And suddenly, the screen cut to black. A series of clips from Jack’s videos flew by one after another at blurring speed before falling back into darkness. And then there was a chuckle…an eerie, childish chuckle that could easily give anyone and everyone a reason to be scared.

The screen glitched out and there he was in all his glory, finally showing his true self and giving everyone a shock. No one would expect him to show up at the panel, and as such, his message would be heard loud and clear. Throughout the remainder of the video, the unstable demon seemed to be a bipolar mess; it was hard to determine what his exact feelings were. One second he’d have a cheeky toothy grin stretched across his sickly pale face, giggling like a lunatic, and the next his expression would be contorted into a godawful grimace of pure annoyance and rage, seething through his teeth and acting a tad threatening towards his audience. His behavior was…off.

He wasn’t like he had been back in October. In October, Anti had been happy and delighted with what he had done. Granted, he had let some of his caged up anger seep out, agitated with how long he had had to wait to be released, but nonetheless, the creature had been overjoyed. He was proud of himself for having done what his creators had wanted…or at least, that’s what he’d thought they had wanted. And now…it was almost like his happiness was being forced, that the smiles upon his face were completely fake and he was struggling to keep any anger from showing. But Anti, being the unhinged entity he was, failed.

“Look at you all – just sitting there! You all thought I was gone!” He scolded, his head undergoing a horrible spasm attack; glitching from left to right. He pointed his knife at the camera angrily before leaning forward, a toothy grin coming to his face as he ran his delicate fingertips over the edge of the knife. “Not worrying about anything.”

He appeared to both look and sound rather pleased, even the cackle of delight that bubbled out of him was unsettlingly cheery. And yet, with a quick glitch of the screen, he was lifting the knife up to his neck in a menacing way, baring his teeth. His neck twitched and jerked out as he smiled.

“You all thought I was gone.” His voice unexpectedly dropped an octave at the last word, an indication that he wasn’t as pleased as everyone was led to believe at first. “But I’ve been here this entire time,” There was the cheeky expression once again; outstretching his arms and acting much like a young child who had just shown their parents a drawing they had worked hard on, “keeping an eye on things.” His eyes flickered blacker than black for half a second, his voice once more dropping an octave. The way he had said those words, accompanied with his inky orbs staring coldly at his audience, was rather disconcerting. Especially given how that face kept alternating with a much different one – one of twisted satisfaction, the signature Cheshire smile etched onto his face.

“You stopped paying attention!” He seethed through his teeth, a sliver of his built up rage hanging off of each word. He was smiling, yet he was evidently very put off with the community’s decisions. “Well I hope you’re happy.” He said it almost sincerely, like he was genuinely hoping everyone was in fact happy with what they had done. “You found someone new! Threw me aside!” Immediately, the smile had vanished in the blink of an eye, a scowl now in its place. He even jabbed an accusing finger at the camera, making his point.

“You found someone to replace me!” And just as quick as it had appeared, the entity was yet again smiling brightly; his head giving a fierce jerk before he locked his eyes onto the camera. It was up for debate on who exactly the creature was talking about, but Anti definitely knew, and that someone was slowly but surely becoming a weakened broken man behind a set of warm steel bars. Someone he absolutely loathed with every fiber of his being.

“I’m not going anywhere!” The abomination chirped, his voice reaching a higher pitch, nearly sounding like a giggle. His form glitched out to show him constantly moving back and forth in an unnatural way, like the creature was stuck in a state of limbo. “I’m always there – always watching.” He said it in both a teasing and threatening manner, his eyes cloaked in darkness as he raised his knife. He was going to make sure that every single one of them would remember he was there and how he was never going to leave – never.

It was around this point that if anyone listened closely, a very faint muffled “help me” could be heard, reminiscent of the one in the “Say Goodbye” video. However, unlike that one – which had been gushing with panic and horror – this one was the exact opposite. It sounded devoid of energy and hope, like the man who was calling out for help had been tortured relentlessly and was losing the battle. It almost sounded like the poor man was sobbing, desperate for someone to notice he was there. A sinister cackle followed his plea; the insidious monster sounding far too pleased with how helpless his prisoner was.

“You can’t get rid of me.” Anti growled menacingly, directing his knife towards the camera threateningly. His form began to spastically glitch out, shaking from the struggle he was having containing his anger. And with that, the screen blacked out. “Enjoy the show.”

When PAX came around – March 10th, to be exact – and the entity got to show the video, he watched from afar, hearing everyone’s alarmed reactions towards his unannounced appearance. He covered his mouth, having a hard time holding back his laughter. Good, they were finally coming to their senses and remembering he was still around. For the remainder of the event, however, Anti refused to let everyone know he was the one wearing Jack’s meatsuit. Because as much as he wanted to reveal the truth, he could hear Jack’s haunting words swirling in the back of his head, reminding him how everyone only thought he was an idea, not an actual existing creature. If he were to show his true self, there was no telling what would happen, so he decided to keep a low profile and slip back into the character of Jacksepticeye.

Everything seemed to be going well for some time in the community. For the rest of the month leading into April, all they could talk about was PAX and of how the glitching demon had unexpectedly shown up to the event, giving them a reminder he was always there, watching them. And of course, through this, Anti grew happy at receiving more attention. He was so thrilled, he was overcome with the temptation to go up to his host and rub in his face about just how wrong he had been. But unfortunately for the entity, the contentment was short-lived.

Just like what had happened back when he had shown himself on Halloween, Anti only received a vast amount of attention for a month or two before everything died down and he was pushed aside as a “one-time thing”. This time around was much different. While many were trying to decipher his message and who had been in control all this time, others were growing tired of the glitch. They seemed a tad bit annoyed, like he was a nuisance, which made Anti confused more than anything. Why were they all suddenly turning their backs on him? Any one of the other egos could show their faces and everyone would be smiling and laughing, pleased to see them. But if he showed his face, he got the opposite greeting. Everyone would either quiver in fear, snap at him to “fuck off and leave Jack alone”, or roll their eyes and huff an exasperated breath, not impressed. Admittedly, there were quite a lot of people who did in fact love the glitch and were always happy to see him, but Anti failed to see that; a crimson haze casted over his vision, only allowing him to notice the people who resented him.

The twitchy manifestation was at a loss for words. He couldn’t come up with a logical reason as to why so many people spited him. What could he have possibly been doing wrong? All he wanted was to be included into the circle, all he wanted was to be seen as an equal and loved and adored like all of the other egos who stood in his way. How come they got more attention than him? They didn’t get any more videos than he did, and yet, somehow, someway, they all received an insane amount of adoration. But with him – one glitch of the screen and the entire fandom would explode with every emotion except for one he longed for: love. And the demon wouldn’t admit it but it hurt him more than anything; more than any physical harm he could do to himself.

Sometime during May, Anti had isolated himself in a far off room in the void. He locked himself in the pitch-black room, pacing back and forth; tormenting himself relentlessly with what Jack had spat at him and whether any of his words had been true or not. He questioned himself over and over again about what he was doing wrong and why the community couldn’t accept him the way he was. He clutched his head, scrunching up his hair in his fingers and tugging harshly as he growled lowly out of frustration. His body was in a constant state of manifesting itself in and out of existence; jerking and pixelating, distorting all of his features.

“What am I doing wrong? What’s so special about all of those other fuckers? What do they have that I don’t?” He snarled venomously, his form lagging mid-step before resuming movement. “I thought they wanted me to be a real thing, I thought they wanted me to come into existence. Isn’t that what they wanted? But if that’s what they wanted, then why are they all dismissing me with ease, like I don’t exist? Why are they ignoring me?!” He huffed, his unnecessary breathing increasing in rate. He was beginning to sound rather exasperated, and if anyone could believe it, like he was a bit emotionally hurt.

“They’re my parents, for fuck sake! They made me who I am – why would they make me like this if they knew it would displease them?! What kind of sick joke is this?!” He flared, his figure glitching out to briefly show a projection of him strangling himself, the next of him cutting his already bleeding throat. He threw his arms out to either side. “I’m doing everything I can! Am I trying too hard? Am I not trying hard enough? There’s no pleasing those people!” A stuttering breath left his lips, his head giving a harsh jerk to the left; a loud audible crack coming from his neck. He was beginning to shake all over now, and it wasn’t from how unstable his form was.

“They’re…They’re supposed to love me…” He muttered under his breath, bringing his pacing to a halt in the middle of the black room. He stared down at the ground, shaking his head only to release a small giggle of disbelief. “But they don’t love me…They don’t love me at all.”

For three whole hours, the glitchy entity remained in that room, putting himself through a horrendous amount of mental agony. Pacing back and forth and glitching out from one part of the room to the next, the demon wallowed in his pain. He ended up collapsing to his knees, hanging his head in shame and burying his face in his hands. Icy cool droplets filled his dark eyes and ran down his cheeks, dripping down into his hands and leaking out through his fingers. No one would ever see this side of the creature – sadness and emotional pain such as this weren’t normal for the demon. He saw it as weakness, and as such, he would never show it. He would never admit to the heart-devouring pain he’d endure every single day caused by the community. He always stood up straight, put on a devious smile, laughed like a psychopath, and demonstrated the behavior of one too. He always came off as a merciless, deranged, inhuman abomination that felt no remorse or guilt. He was essentially heartless; he didn’t give a shit about anyone but himself. As far as anyone was concerned, he took great joy in seeing others suffer. Love wasn’t a concept he could understand – it was something he could NEVER learn.

But they were all wrong. Every single one of them was wrong about him. He DID have a heart, he DID care about what others thought of him. He DID want to be loved by not just the community but Jack and the egos as well. And yet, here he was, coming to terms with just how much he was hated by his so-called “family”.

Anti sat down in the furthest corner of the room, knees brought in close to his chest as he tugged at his hair; endless tears of hurt cascading down his face. Jack’s assumption had been right before – he had been looking at a wounded animal. The poor creature couldn’t pull himself together. He had been made to be unstable, and as such, any emotion he would feel, would become impossibly heightened to the tenth degree. There was no easy way out of this hell he was putting himself through, there was no way for him to calm down. He just sat there, letting the darkness consume him and allowing the sorrow to rip away at his heart horrifically.

 As though he were a broken record, Anti scolded himself, repeatedly asking himself what was wrong with him as opposed to what was wrong with the community. Maybe Jack had been right, maybe he was a mistake. Maybe he shouldn’t have existed to begin with. Maybe the community did only like him as an idea versus as an actual existing entity. No one loved him, no one cared about him. He was just there as a joke for everyone to do with as they pleased. He was like a puppet having his strings tugged at, playing a part in their deceiving game. And the poor damaged manifestation was getting pulled apart at the seams at the thought.

This is what they had done to him.

They had cut out his heart and forced it down his throat.

He was dead inside.

                                                        * * * * *

 There he stood, hovering over his patient, lost in a state of memory. His hellish eyes, which had been clouded over with rage and hatred a second ago, now held pain and suffering. Those eyes were the eyes of a creature that had been beaten and abused horribly countless times over – the eyes of someone who had been through hell and back. And for a fleeting moment, it almost seemed like those eyes were beginning to water.

“Those fuckers…They ruined me.” He hissed softly under his breath, his fingers tightening around the orbitoclast currently wedged into his patient’s skull. He shook his head slightly, eyes unblinking. He was looking down at the man like he was expecting him to be sympathetic towards him. “All I ever wanted was to be loved…Was that so much to ask for? Was it that hard of a concept to grasp?” His voice was wavering, sounding like he was on the very verge of crying.

However, at hearing his patient let out a pained moan, Anti blinked and removed himself from his dreary reverie; the unhinged monster within returning to the surface. He smirked behind his mask.

“Nevertheless, who needs love? It’s overrated. Ain’t that right, Doctor?” He giggled as he twisted the steel instrument around, getting the man to produce yet another moan of unwanted agony. “You of all people should know that, what with how your pathetic family left you.” He scoffed. “Who needs them? They abandoned you! If they truly loved you, they wouldn’t have left, now would they?” He gave the orbitoclast a violent tab, a spurt of blood flying up into his face. His patient arched and let out a choked yelp at the searing pain. The demon’s smirk developed into a smile. “You should never hurt the ones you love…Never.”

 His patient went placid against the table, no longer moving or making useless attempts at escape. Anti noticed and chuckled, lightly slapping the bloodied man’s face to try and get a reaction out of him. All he received was a drawn out wheezing breath. Chuckling lightly, the sadistic creature tore his mask away from his face and tore the orbitoclast out of the man’s skull carelessly, not at all concerned whether or not he managed to damage something else. His patient jolted and groaned loudly, but didn’t struggle against his bonds or scream from the striking pain. Anti threw the ice pick off to the side somewhere before strolling away from the table, ridding himself of his surgical attire as he headed for the exit.

“Don’t get up, Doc. I’ll be back in a minute.” He said as he stormed out of the operating room. As soon as he left, his smile faltered. “I need to visit your creator.”

                                                           * * * * *

Back within the freezing cold hell, the green-haired Irishman was a shivering mess. He was on his knees where he had been standing not too long ago when he had yelled at Anti. His face was buried in his shredded up, blood-caked hands, crying out of fear for not just himself but of what Anti had done. Why had he left the room? He had said he was going to visit the doctor, and immediately, possible scenarios of gut-wrenching horror flooded the YouTuber’s head. What was Anti doing to Henrik? Was he torturing him? Was he getting him to do something completely obscene and wrong? Was he killing him? Jack choked on a sob at that last one.

The man nearly jumped out of his skin when he heard the front door burst open; lifting his head hesitantly to see his alter ego storm into the room. Before he knew what he was doing, Jack got to his feet and grasped the icy bars of the cell.

“What did you do?!” He wailed, loose tears running down his face. “What did you do?!” He repeated, both demanding and dreading an answer.

Anti frowned from where he stood, eyes fixed onto his prisoner. His arms flung out to either side of him. “I did what was necessary!” He snapped sharply, a bit put off with the Irishman’s whining.

He took a few steps forward, boring his dark soulless orbs into the crippled YouTuber. His body glitched out, his head jerking violently to the right; the slit across his throat seeming to stretch further at the motion.

“I did what I had to do!”

 He materialized, suddenly now having his back facing Jack. He pulled up his shirt, and while biting deeply into his bottom lip and letting loose a pained hiss, the skin of his back pixelated and was pulled back, revealing his spine to his host. There was crimson blood everywhere accompanied with some sort of sticky black sludge. There were veins and bits and pieces of his insides here and there that appeared as though they had had something severed from them; evident due to the holes scattered about and how some veins hadn’t been sealed off properly. All along his spine there were dark splotches and some kind of green residue there, almost as if something had once been attached to the creature’s spine.

Jack flung away from the bars and nearly screamed, a wave of nausea crashing over him and knocking the wind out of him. He stumbled backward and instantly collapsed to his knees, keeling over as bile rose in his throat. He couldn’t hold back. He heaved violently and vomited, the sight of Anti’s insides far too revolting for him to stomach.

“Your ‘precious’ community made me do this, Jack.” The demented entity hissed with distaste. “They were always pulling the strings, ALWAYS the ones to twist and shape me however they pleased.” He scoffed, a giggle ringing out of his vocal cords as though this was all some fucked up joke to him. “They made me a joke. They dragged me along in their game, and I HAD ENOUGH!” He growled momentarily before the abnormally delighted smile returned to the creature’s paled face. “So…I got the ‘good doctah’ to sever the strings once and for all.” He cackled, shaking his head as his back closed back up and he lowered his shirt.

The Irishman raised his head, breathing heavily and having difficulty getting air into his lungs. His eyes were blown wide with horror, staring at his counterpart with disbelief like he couldn’t believe what the creature was saying.

“Oh my God, Anti, why?! Why?! Why would you - ?!” He got cut off, nearly choking on the left over bile in his throat. He groaned and hacked harshly, spitting it up. He sobbed softly and shook his head vigorously, fixing his lifeless eyes onto the demon. “You didn’t have to do that! Why the hell would you do that to yourself?!” He cried, like he wasn’t just horrified of what he’d discovered but also like he genuinely cared about the demonic entity’s wellbeing. “Why the FUCK would you mutilate your body – why would you go through something like that?!”

Anti slowly turned around to face him, no evidence of there having been a smile on his face a moment ago. He no longer looked amused or happy; there was nothing but anger and hate written in his eyes. His form was struggling to remain stable now, lines of static racing across his body here and there; jerking from left to right as he took a step towards the cage. He cocked his head and scoffed, like he couldn’t believe he had just heard the green-haired man ask him such a stupid question.

“You think I wanted this?” He asked in such a soft static-laced voice, it managed to send chills up Jack’s spine. “You think I really wanted to do this – that I wanted to have the one thing that made me who I am, the one crucial part of my being, torn out of my body without care like it didn’t matter?” He inquired, although the way he was phrasing the question didn’t sound like a question. It sounded as though he expected Jack to already know the answer. He shook his head slowly, staring at the Irishman with slight shock.

 “I did what had to be done and I don’t regret it.” He spat, even though his words came out a bit off, like he wasn’t telling the truth. “They can’t control me anymore.” He jolted forward, pressing his face into the bars of the cell. “I’m not their bitch, they’re mine. They are all my puppets now…and we’ll see how much they like to be strung about in a twisted game of pain and suffering.” His face glitched out, very briefly showing a different version of him, except this one was unlike any of the others Jack had seen before. Every time Anti’s form would become distorted, Jack would always see projections of him either displaying violent behavior or he’d be a terrifying laughing lunatic. But this time…there was none of that.

There was no uncontrollable anger, no frustration, no unsettling glee accompanied with chilling giggles.

There was only sadness, a look of hurt on his face as though he had been horribly beaten and was now a cowering mess. And though it had happened at a blurring speed, Jack could’ve sworn he had seen tears well up in the creature’s eyes.

Jack’s eyes widened ever so slightly, remembering how earlier he had seen Anti in a similar vulnerable state – something he had never once seen come from the glitch before. Licking his cracked lips and letting out a raspy wheezing breath, the Irishman tried to talk some sense into the entity.

“Anti…D-Don’t…” He coughed harshly, a few drops of blood spluttering forth. He shook his head. “Y-You don’t want to do this…You…You’re wrong…about them.” He inhaled sharply, groaning as he felt a stinging pain in his chest. He hunched over and shifted around, attempting to get into a comfortable position. “Y-You…You don’t know them like I do.”

Anti kept his abyssal orbs locked on the Irishman, never once leaving his face. There was no telling what was going through the manifestation’s head; his expression was unreadable. One moment it looked like he was pissed off, the next it seemed flat like he didn’t care at all. He scoffed, the corner of his lips tugging up into a slight smirk that only lasted for half a second.

“No, you’re right. You’re right, I don’t know them like you do.” His head gave a violent jerk to the right, a loud crack emitting from his slashed neck. He bored his eyes into his prisoner, anger becoming the more dominant emotion now. “Because you’ve been strung along in their deceiving game. All this time, you’ve been led into believing that they care about you – that they care about any of us, for that matter – and because of it, you’ve been holding onto false hope for the day they save your ass.” He seethed, his words striking deep into the man’s heart.

“You need to wake up and realize they’re never going to save you, they are NEVER going to help you. They are the true monster in all of this. They all put on an innocent act and like they’re not at fault. But they are the ones to blame! They caused ALL of this to happen!” He unexpectedly slammed his hands against the bars, making Jack flinch and shuffle backward. The demon’s eyes became drenched in black, heavy shaky breaths of anger puffing out through his lips. “They don’t give a FUCK about any one of us, and it’s not until now that I’ve come to realize this.”

Jack shook his head in disagreement. “No…N-No, y-you’re wrong…Y-You’re mistaken, A-Anti…” He insisted, shivering from the cold. The room had gotten so cold, he could now see his own breath. Funnily enough, even though Anti was breathing, his breath wasn’t visible. The Irishman found it to be a rather odd observation. “Th-They do care. A-About me, about th-the others, and…a-and about you too.”

At hearing this, the glitch couldn’t contain his mirth and threw his head back, letting out a horrific laugh of delight. He locked his eyes back onto his host, a toothy grin on his cruel face, clearly not believing the man.

“Is that so?” He chuckled lightly. “Do you remember what you had said to me long ago, back in January?...Do you remember?” His grin was slowly but surely slipping away, fading down to a smile, then into what almost looked like a pained scowl. “Do you remember?” He softly whispered through the bars. “Do you remember what you said to me?” His voice, it sounded…strained, like he was struggling to breathe properly or something.

Jack’s brows weaved out of confusion, trying to recall what the demon was talking about. This damned room, he could barely think clearly. For Christ’s sake, he had had so much difficulty remembering what had happened in October. How was he supposed to remember what – ?

And then it all came at him full-force with no warning. Suddenly, the Irishman was able to notice the pain behind the creature’s fury, and his facial expression softened as he felt an overwhelming amount of guilt coil around his fist-sized organ of innocence and constrict it tightly. He began to feel tears returning to the surface, welling up in his eyes as he tore his gaze away from his alter ego. Anti groaned and pulled away from the bars.

“Oh for fuck sake, enough with the crying already! It’s getting to be annoying.” He bemoaned. “Come on, I haven’t even hurt you yet! What could you be possibly crying about now?!”

 Jack kept his head low in shame, shaking it as the tears threatened to tip over the edge.

“I…I-I…I’m sorry…” He whispered so softly, it could barely be heard. He swallowed the lump in his throat and sobbed, shaking his head as he closed his eyes, a look of pain coming upon his face. “I-I’m so sorry…I…O-Oh God…” He lifted his hands, covering his face as he cried.

Anti frowned. Normally he’d be amused at seeing his prisoner so broken up like this, but not today. He was in absolutely no mood for waterworks.

“Sorry? What the fuck are you babbling on about?” He banged against the bars. “Come on, speak up!” He snapped with annoyance.

The green-haired man gulped in what little air he could as he pulled his soaked hands away from his face, reopening his eyes.

“I…I-I’m so s-sorry, I…” He sniffled. “I-I had no…i-idea that you…” He stopped himself, taking a breather to try and calm his nerves. It didn’t work out as well as he had hoped. He shook his head in disbelief as the memories tormented him. “Th-Those words…Th-Those things I had said, Jesus Christ…” He shut his eyes tightly, pinching the bridge of his nose and cringing at the reminder. He bit his lip, trying so very hard to stop himself from crying. His bottom lip trembled as he struggled to speak. “I…I thought…I thought you were heartless…I-I th-thought that…that there was n-no good in you at all…I…I figured y-you were a…a…”

“A monster?” Anti answered so harshly, his body rippled violently.

Jack tensed up at the word and he immediately lifted his head to lock eyes with the demon. Wet lines of sorrow stained his cheeks and his eyes were red, sore from the countless times he had cried. He shook his head slowly, still shell-shocked by the haunting memory.

“I-I’m s-so sorry…I-I don’t know w-why I said th-those things…” He sniffled and nervously chuckled out of disbelief, like this had to be some sick joke of sorts. “I-I didn’t mean any of it…I…I-I didn’t know, I swear to God, I d-didn’t…” He sobbed, a few lone tears running down his face. “I w-was wrong about you, Anti…I-I was so wrong…I…” He swallowed his tears. “I-I was so blind to see that…that the one who truly n-needed help…th-the one who n-needed love…” He looked up at the creature with pleading eyes, hoping like hell that he believed his words, because none of them were lies. He was telling the honest-to-God truth, and it was ripping him apart. “w-was you…Th-That’s all y-you’ve ever wanted…Y-You’ve w-wanted t-to be a part of s-something…a-and w-we have f-failed you…” He cried, shaking all over not from just the cold but from the force of his crying. “I…I-I’m so sorry, Anti.” He whispered softly.

The unhinged abomination glitched out for a moment, standing there with his gaze fixed onto the quivering mess of a man named Jack. Like before, his face was unreadable. Jack couldn’t tell if he was enraged, annoyed, amused, happy, or something else entirely. For a split second, when the entity went to stand up straight, the Irishman had winced and whimpered, raising his arms to brace himself for any sort of act of violence. But nothing came. Instead, he heard the creature let out a shaken breath.

“I knew it…I knew this would happen.”

Blinking with confusion, the YouTuber lowered his arms just enough to glance up at the demon.

“You’re just as bad as them.” He hissed, his entire body glitching out to show a projection of himself crying out in anguish. “You don’t care – you didn’t before, and you still don’t. All of this,” He motioned at the man crying his eyes out in the cold dank cell, “is just an act, just an excuse – an attempt to try and win me over so I can release you from this hell. Well guess what? It’s not going to work, so drop the act. I’ve had enough of the lies from everyone.” He growled with such hatred, his head stuttered and twitched from left to right, struggling to keep his anger at bay.

Jack blinked, frowning with perplexity. “W-What? No…N-No, no, no. Y-You…” He coughed violently, “y-you think - ?” He shook his head, pushing himself up into a standing position and nearly falling over. He quickly steadied himself against the prison bars, his eyelids slipping shut tiredly before reopening them to look at the entity. “Th-This…This isn’t an a-act…” He coughed again, hacking harshly into one of his bloodied palms. “I-I am t-truly sorry, An-Anti…a-and…a-and the c-community…i-if they are th-the ones who…who c-created you…th-then they do care.”

Anti growled. “Lies.”

 “N-No…No, I-I know them…I-I know w-what they’re like…a-and…” He sucked in a breath, choking on it and heaving into his hand dryly. “u-ugh….mmgh…” He winced before standing up as straight as he could. “t-they do care…Th-Those jokes th-they make a-about you…” He shook his head, “th-they’re just jokes, th-that’s all…I-It’s what th-they do. H-Hell,” He scoffed, “th-they’ve m-made jokes about m-me and…and the others b-before…” He shrugged, licking at the tears that ran over his lips. “I-It’s j-just their w-way of showing th-their appreciation – th-their l-love.”

He coughed violently, nearly collapsing to the ground at the force of his coughing. He groaned in pain, his legs wobbling as he struggled to remain standing. He looked at Anti with exhaustion.

“P-Please…B-Believe me…Th-They d-don’t h-hate you, Anti…” He insisted in a pleading tone of voice, a lone tear running down his cheek. He shook his head. “N-No…No one has to get hurt…Y-You c-can…can be happy and l-loved…l-like you were m-meant to be.” He said weakly before sliding down to the ground with a thud, letting out a weak moan.

Through the dark, though his eyes had fallen shut for a brief moment, the Irishman made out a very faint sob. His eyelids were heavy with the longing to stay shut, but he forced them open to see the glitch’s face contorted into one of frustration. There was anger, hatred, and…and sorrow. There was pain – heart-aching pain, tears welling up in the hurt creature’s darkened eyes. His grip on the bars of the cell was so tight, Jack was almost afraid he was going to break them and charge into the cage to slaughter him. Lucky for him, that didn’t happen. His entire body was visibly shaking and not just from how he was glitching out constantly every few seconds. It almost seemed like the poor creature was fighting himself, like he was holding back on something. His bottom lip was trembling as he struggled to keep himself from showing weakness.

“R-Really?...Is that so?” The demon stuttered in a static-laced voice. And though he sounded beyond furious, he couldn’t hide the truth from the Irishman. He was hurting, and it was showing as clear as day. “Y-You think they all care?” A small sad smirk tugged at his lips as he outstretched a hand behind him. “Th-Then how do you explain these?” And with a snap of his fingers, a patch of darkness dissolved to show endless posts on Tumblr, YouTube, Instagram, and Twitter.

Jack squinted, dragging himself forward in a poor attempt to see well. His eyes widened a tad bit when he realized what each one was about. Every one of the posts was hateful and overly mean towards the glitch, and none of them were in a joking manner, even Jack himself could tell.

“Fuck off, Anti! Leave Jack and the egos alone!”

“Go away! We don’t want you here!”

“Look at him – he’s having a temper tantrum. He’s not scary, he’s just complaining about what he can’t have.”

“You people do realize this is all just an act, right? Anti’s not real, get over it.”

“Anti, why the hell are you here?”

“We need to get rid of Anti, guys! It’s the only way we’ll get Jack back! Who’s with me?!”

“Anti, it’s not Halloween yet! Go back to sleep!”

“Glitch Bitch!”

Every single comment or post was either making fun of the glitching entity or just straight up being hurtful in the worst way imaginable, such as telling him to go away and that he wasn’t wanted – that no one wanted to see him. No one knew it, but every one of the posts hurt the creature to a horrible extent, and Jack couldn’t blame him. He stared at the screen with appalment. These couldn’t be from his community, there was no way. He knew his fans and they were most certainly not this cruel – not towards him or the other egos, at least. And if Anti was their creation, then why the hell would they treat him worse than dirt?

Jack didn’t know what to say, and Anti could tell. He scoffed, the sad smirk still upon his face.

“Y-You see? You c-can’t even defend th-them.” He lowered his arm as the screen materialized, gone forever. “Th-They don’t care about me…I-I’ve always been j-just a nuisance to them – a-an object for th-them to toy with.” His form spastically glitched out all of sudden, a projection of him lurching forth; tugging at his head and bawling his eyes out, screaming out in pain. Jack gasped softly, pressing back into the bars behind him. Anti jerked his head. “I-I…I will n-never be loved…b-because th-that’s not the reason w-why I-I was m-made.”

The Irishman’s eyes widened with surprise as he watched Anti blink, a lone tear finally falling loose and running down the demon’s cheek. His bottom lip trembled more, having little to no control over his emotions anymore. Another tear fell from his eye.

“Th-They d-didn’t make me…b-because they w-wanted a s-son…T-They made me b-because…th-they wanted a m-monster…” He sobbed softly, his entire form vibrating and giving a violent glitch. And though his body was unstable, the creature’s voice remained rather quiet, like a murmur. He almost sounded human.

“Th-They w-want…a v-villain...th-that they can h-hate and f-fear…Th-That’s all they’ve ever w-wanted…f-from the start.” He shook fiercely, anger starting to come back with a vengeance; his voice becoming much harsher and more distorted. “S-So…if th-that’s what they w-want…i-if that’s w-what’ll please them…” He chuckled lightly, another cool tear racing down his face. His sad smirk morphed into a twisted ugly smile. “Th-Then that’s w-what I’ll give them.” He shook his head vigorously, licking at the salty tears over his lips. “N-No more…L-Love is t-truly dead…” He cackled. “F-Fear…” He hummed with bemusement, “is w-what’ll get th-there attention…p-permanently.”

 He pushed himself away from the bars and growled at himself, roughly wiping his eyes free of any more tears before turning on his heel to storm for the exit. Jack almost immediately scrambled to his feet, gripping onto the bars for dear life so he wouldn’t collapse again.

“W-Wait, wait, wait!” He croaked hoarsely, barely having any voice left in him. He reached his arm out through the cell, hoping Anti wouldn’t leave. There was no telling what the demon would do once he left. Hell, Jack still didn’t even know what Henrik’s fate had been!

“An-Anti, please!” He coughed dryly, his shoulders shaking. He was beginning to fall incredibly weak again, his eyes feeling heavy with exhaustion and the temperature of the room was only making it worse. “D-Don’t…” He gave one last attempt, one last plea before his knees gave out; collapsing to the ground and passing out cold.

Anti didn’t bother to look over his shoulder at the Irishman. He didn’t even retort back with a snarky taunting remark of sorts, the closest thing being, “Now if you’ll excuse me, I have some unfinished business to attend to.”

He wasn’t his usual self, and Jack had seen it with his own two eyes. It had been a long while since the entity had had a chance to vent out these painful emotions, but he had no time to lock himself away.

No…He couldn’t lock himself away…

But he could take his hurt out on someone else…

Part 9 - No Strings Attached

Part 11 - In Your Head

 @gridhorizon @jse-fandom-protection-squad @septic-obsessed @darkcurious @butterlover328 @steffid101 @sketchy-scribs-n-doods @n-o-ra-xi @haveaverynicetime @golden-eyed-guardians @fear-is-nameless @nightmarewolf133 @maybekatie @jack-a-yote @lil-gib @aeoix @lemonofweirdness @randomcrystals @yourestillnotmytype-58

#this came out ridiculously long x_x #so sorry #but fuuuuuck #the angst in this killed me horribly #I actually cried both when I wrote it and when I proofread it #it's that painful #now if you'll excuse me #I'm going to go cry in a corner and question what I've just done #sorry not sorry #you shall all suffer with me #mwuhahahaha! #glitched #antisepticeye #anti #jacksepticeye #antisepticeye fanfiction #anti fanfiction #jacksepticeye fanfiction #antisepticeye fanfic #anti fanfic #jacksepticeye fanfic #angst #so much angst

[inexchangeforyoursoul]

... look. There’s no guarantee that I’ll ever finish the next chapter, which is... about halfway done, maybe. As for the whole thing? It will never survive till the end. I just know it- my attention span is shit, as soon as I hyperfocus on another thing it’s adios, amigos. Also, I don’t write a lot and my style is rather convoluted, sorry about the consequences- you are already experiencing them. Anyway, I’ve never jotted down any of... these types of ideas, ever. So there’s that, too.

Either way, here lay the specifics: series is One Piece; the basic setup is an unfortunate body swap; this is a self insert fic with an insert that borders an OC- little is specified about the female insert’s looks, but a lot about her personality. This might change, but let’s stick to the topic. If -and let me emphasize IF- I get into this far enough, it will be, like, OCxCanon, with Law as a target.  But since I have logorrhea and such, we’ll never get there.

I also like to stick to Gen, sfw, and also canon while randomly entering other territories on a whim. I also have really dumb jokes.

If I get as far as 2 chapters, I’ll scrape together a title for an AO3 upload and put a link here (which is now a thing... here’s the link), until then you’ll have to tolerate my blog’s looks. The combination of Ctrl and +/- are your friend. Anywho, without further ado...

„I imagine... this is pretty high on your list of 'worst decisions ever made'.” is all she can muster in a voice that has an unfamiliar tinge of a higher pitch while looking down at an extended arm that is definitely not hers. As in, things she wasn't born with.

“I...” he starts, trying to rationalize the situation, but cuts the sentence off right there. The face, which used to be her playing field, looks just as stern and vaguely embarrassed as his would, and is quickly losing color, then gaining more than usual. A slim hand halfheartedly twitches into motion to reverse the mistake, to no avail- another digs into now longer hair in disbelief.

His devil fruit was, naturally, left with his body- a body which now she resides in. So if they want to regain their... privacy should be the word, well...

She looks back at her “new” hands- this doesn't feel all that different. Apart from her head not hurting from hitting it into a shelf yesterday, that is- instead, there is an easy to ignore stinging in her left wrist and side which might as well be from straining or a fall. As far as powers are concerned, though... she has no idea where to even begin if she wanted to give them a try. She's not even sure how Law ended up swapping them in the first place; after the first few hours of acquaintance it's clear that it takes little talent to push the man's thinly veiled buttons; playing dumb is beyond effective, even if it's sarcasm, -to which he is no stranger to in the first place, so what even is his deal?- but no matter what happened, he always kept his head straight. At least he did in this almost-week of acquaintance. He didn't drink as far as she knows, either, nor had an especially bad day, so... what was it that pushed him over the brink?

The handful of eye witnesses are also frozen in shock.

“Holy shit,” is all that Usopp breathes as the 'yes, that just happened' sinks in. Chopper keeps slurping from his straw, even though his cup of milkshake has been empty for the past ten seconds. If the legends are to be trusted, they've experienced the consequences firsthand, and are also connecting the one, big, problematic dot in the picture based on it. Shachi and Penguin, who have presumably witnessed the effects more often, seem to be taking it better. Seem to.

“Well... thiiis is awkward,” states the latter.

“And will remain so until it's... fixed,” adds Shachi, scratching his nose. “... does this mean we have, like, two captains now?” he asks a second later, wondering.

“Well... I ain't no captain of yours.” The statement in the de facto voice of their actual captain ups the awkwardness by multiple levels.

Grimacing, Penguin looks at Law, who has been staring at a nondescript wood grain on deck and is holding his head as he's likely trying to figure out something to deal with the problem; then shifts his attention to his captain's body and her in it, where he's greeted with a shrug. “As nice as it would be to have a cute captain, I guess we better hurry and do something as soon as possible.” He summarizes. Shachi hums.

„Shucks, thanks~” The uncharacteristic tone makes the boys rather squeamish  at this point while Law is reconsidering his life choices. The girl continues unfazed, though: “As for the fix, it's not that I couldn't... try. What's the worst that could happen, right?” Unsettling visions of many kind flash in front of everyone's eyes; before the occupant of her body could say anything, she states her own conclusion: “Ripping out some vital organ and killing us both in an instant is what it is.” She scratches her beard- this is a thing she has now. Which is actually pretty cool, because sometimes she muses over growing one, just for the hell of it- but then keep shaving for the rest of her life whenever she doesn't want it around? No, thank you. Now she gets to experience it free of charge, if this can be said about the situation.

Also, she's so... tall. She could get used to this, yes... feeling it. A lot.

“Is what it is,” he speaks up finally, ignoring the amused half-smile that's slowly spreading over the girl called Kat's new face; “You'll need to go through some training before we even attempt this, or anything else, on a living target. Until that...” he takes a hard-to-identify look at himself, “we'll... have to get by as we can.”

“No need to overthink it, alright. Should be fine.” she assures him. “The longer I think about it, the more enjoyable this adventure seems, actually.” She couldn't hide her grin if she wanted to. And even if she could... that glint in her eye? Whatever she's thinking of, it's a No and earns a suspicious look on Law's part.

“No funny business with my body.” As the imagination if the boys is taking an obvious and immediate turn towards uncharted, wild, wild territories, he feels the need to clarify. Really now, if these hooligans had popcorn lying around, they'd be munching on it as if watching some especially exciting play unfold. “You will stay put; as in, right here. On board of one of the ships. Meanwhile I will stay put as best as I can while managing my crew, too, got it?”

“Yes, yes, geez,” she says, rolling her eyes. Her place is right over there, down the coast past the docks, within plain sight, but whatever. He's lucky that right after the weekend there's a holiday, so she's free to play along for roughly six days despite having had other plans.

He doesn't look convinced. Well then.

“I will not promise to stick to your diet, training plan, music taste, or... whatever your daily routine is, okay?” she continues, counting out the items on her hands- those tattooed to hell-and-back hands. Steering her attention back on topic, she straightens herself to pledge in as official of a manner as possible, even forcing herself to keep eye contact for more than one second: “But I hereby also declare to do my best not to get your body maimed by marines, headhunters, or any of the people you've pissed off with your attitude in the past twenty-something years.” She closes her left hand, save one finger. “Pinky promise.” After a moment of consideration, she adds 'you better give me a list, though'. He is a man of many secrets and twenty locks on his mouth, after all. Also, she doesn't actually know shit about him past being as much of a wallflower as her, possibly having a degree and also a Reputation- keeping up with the news in general is not Kat's forte.

Law pulls his mouth to the side, but seems more relaxed upon hearing that. Then he turns around, leaving the expectant audience somewhat disappointed. “I'm... going back to my room. Come down tomorrow at 8. And do not fool around with the devil fruit powers until then.”

“... should I just tell people who come to me that you fucked up?” she shouts after him before the door of the submarine could close. It stops halfway and stays ajar for a while. A harder pill to swallow than expected, huh.

He needs a minute to consider how to answer- the initial thought was to groan an exasperated “no, pretend everything's normal”, but... getting his body back may take anything from a few days' time to... straight-up months, depending on her skills and outside forces. The option also leaves way too much room for shenanigans, which, based on the past two days, this woman here appears to indulge in. The harmless ones, yes... but she didn't appear to be one for Strawhat-brand tomfoolery at first, either, and what did he know. All in all, he's better off being safe than sorry. “Don't advertise it outside the alliance for both of our sakes, if you please. Also, they should look for me--- I mean, you, if my skills are needed. The remaining ones, that is.”

“Aye aye, captain~” he can hear from not too far away, with sarcastic tinge still intact. Law closes the door, staying still for a few seconds before making his way down to his chamber- does he really sound like that? He really needs to sleep on this if he can. Also, he has a rather big bump on his head and it stings.

The cool winds of the early night dissolve Kat's excitement from a mere minute ago, and she can feel her inner clock hitting one before bedtime. As she's about to turn around and get her stuff, it occurs to her that she's not supposed to go home- which gives her another rush of blood, and a slight sense of alarm.

“Wait... where will I sleep?” she snaps back, expecting the answer from the four silent judges still idling by.

Chopper stops slurping.

#opfic #op fanfic #you know what these will be more than enough #also in the end I decided to go for third person instead of second #Kate writes #KMKY

[lubdubsworld]

Under my Skin.

(Author’s Note : This is for the anon who requested a Namjoon gang au with a love triangle between yoongi, namjoon and Oc. And i’m sorry, I know you were specific about it being gang au , but since i’ve already written a gang au I didn’t want it to be a repetitive story. )

This is canon- compliant. 

inspired by :

TVXQ- Mirotic

BTS Hold me Tight.

Genre : Drama/ Angst/ Romance

Warnings : Language , Sexual content. 

Chapter 1/? 

The camera feels heavy in my hand, my legs aching from countless hours of standing in the same position, my eyes heavy from lack of sleep, my shoulders weighed down by the camera bag as well as exhaustion. I feel bone-weary and sick, the taste of ash on the back of my throat, the piercing stagelights burning my corneas as i try to shake off the tiredness and keep the camera steady, focusing solely on the black haired man onstage.

He looks breathtaking, Like someone just mixed starlight with gold and poured a bucketful of it over him, coating him with an ethereal shine. His skin looks like butter, soft , unmarred and the way his limbs move, it makes my throat go dry. He’s dressed in all black today and I’m grateful for the open air concert. The wind isn’t particularly strong but it’s still soothing , ice cold against the heated skin near my hairline, licking wet stripes across my sweaty skin. I want to sleep, but this is how i make money, so i hoist the camera higher, staring at perfection through the camera lens. 

Min Yoongi looks like a dream. 

He’s wearing a black silk shirt, a jacket that makes him look broader, fitted slacks that mold to his lean legs and hips. His hair is ash blonde, silver chains glinting against the fabric of his shirt and the cold gives his face some much needed color. 

it isn’t until a good five minutes into their performance that I notice that he’s actually staring at me. I almost falter. His tongue darts out , lightly flicking the corner of his lips and his gaze is heavy, curious and concentrated. 

It’s not exactly, new. Idols recignize me often. I’m usually a fixture at all their performances and after two dozen times, a face is bound to register on your memory. He probably recognizes me from the countless times I’ve slogged in the cramped audience, working my ass off to make sure he looks perfect. 

It’s not like i mind : he’s hot and i get paid for it, so it’s a win on all counts. 

But this time, his gaze doesn’t flicker away the way i’d expect it to. He keeps his eyes on my camera for the rest of the performance and somewhere along the second song, i know he’s putting on a show for me. it’s in his gaze, the sort of smug little smile that says, “ Here, have some of this .” 

I try not to let it get to me. I’m not in the same league as him, I know and most idols do treat us photographers with disdain. What they don’t seem to realize is that most of their popularity stems from ,  us  making them look good. 

It isn’t until the performance is ending, that i notice something else. He’s shrugging out of his jacket, now dressed only in the thin shirt and in the open air that just looks painful. He casually stares at me again and then he smiles. 

it’s nothing overtly sexual, just a little smile that tells me he’s noticed . I turn away at once, heart pounding unfairly. 

You don’t have the time or energy for this shit. Don’t start stuff you know will end in a lot of headache. 

I glance at the clock. 12.10 AM. Good God. Another hour at least before I get back to the office and drop off the film and another hour before i reach my cramped apartment and then it would be just three hours tops before I would have to go to class. I take photography and image media at the Seoul University , my schedules hard enough to manage with all this extra work i do. 

One day, I would be a successful photographer and all these alleyway meanderings and idol chases would be a thing of the past. I learnt technique, I learned what good angles were, I learned how lighting affects exposure and honestly, the whole thing was just a learning process. A step in acheiving my dream. i have to see it as such. Min Yoongi was a learning process. The only thing he could give me was an idea to better my craft. 

 This is a phase and that means that these shared glances with into Min Yoongi are a phase too. I can’t honestly afford to get swept away. 

Sighing, I push the camera into my bag, zipping it carefully as I follow the crowd of photographers to the exit. The moment i turn the corner, leading to the small hallway to the exits, a burly security guy grabs my elbow, none to softly. 

“Hey, miss! “ 

I grunt in surprise, aware of the grip that was a little too rough and I stare at him in annoyance.

“what?”

“You... one of the kids want to see you. Ten minutes only.” 

 One of the kids.

I feel my jaw starting to come unhinged. It’s reckless to actually call a stranger backstage. Did he have no sense of responsibility? Sighing, I yank my hand away from the security and glance at my watch again. 

Fine, ten minutes. 

I peered past the curtain and then stared as he opened a locked door carefully and shooed me in. 

“Fourth door on the right. Wait for him there.” 

The hallways are dimly lit, some of the lights flickering and there are dozens of people moving in and out,m packing up, clearing the venue and what not. Fourth door on the right. I open the door and frown. it’s a waiting room, empty. I settle into the nearest chair and the exhaustion of the day begins to finally take it’s toll. I’m almost drifting off when my phone pings. Groggy, i pull it out. 

 where is the film? 

 My boss. 

i groan in frustration. This is what happened when you let yourself get swayed by these idols. i needed my job. . It was important to upload fancams on time. A few hours could mean the difference between millions of views and honestly, that matters a lot. Besides, i’d spent so much hours in the cold, it’s downright depressing to think it would go to waste. 

I stand up and stretch, looking around the room. It’s been twenty minutes. where the hell is he? Assuming it’s Yoongi, of course. i groan at the crick in my back and finally my eyes fall on what looks like  note on the small coffee table. It’s underneath a snowglobe and I startle, staring at the pretty white crystal glass and as i pick it up, i feel mildly stunned

It’s Florence. The cathedral done to sharp detail and I feel momentary disquiet because Florence is every photographer’s dream. I’d won a trip in a photography competition and I had ended up doing my undergrad thesis on Florence. It had been published in a magazine, and i’d gotten quite a bit of money out of it.

I unfold the note and it says in beautiful printed hangul, 

I love your photographs. Let’s go to Florence together,

Your number one fan. 

I freak out a little because, did Yoongi read photography magazines? Was he into photography? It made no sense. When did he even have the time? But inside came a little bit of a pang.

I have no family. No friends to share my gift with and i know that even if I became successful, there isn’t anyone out there who would be happy for me. Did yoongi actually like my photographs, even when they were not of him? 

My phone buzzes again and .I realize that i have to go. 

 I grab my bag , slip the note and the globe into the bag and move out of the room quickly, ready to run back to office if need be , turning the corner only to crash head first into a figure that is at once, too tall and too broad and too  solid  for my less than sober body.

I get thrown to the floor, landing hard on my butt and when I look up, it’s Min Yoongi. It’s hard to believe but he’s actually tall. In the company of his towering bandmates he looks a little smaller but , alone in the darkened corridor he’s definitely a lot taller than me. 

His eyes widen in recognition and he smiles slowly, leisurely. 

“Are you lost?” He drawls. 

I blink a bit and shake my head , wincing but accepting the hand he stretches out. He pulls a little too sharply and i’m tired enough to falter, tired enough to sway over and nearly crash into his warm chest, fingers flying out reflexively to grip firm shoulders, inhaling one huge breath of male skin and expensive cologne that sets my heart pounding. 

I don’t miss the way he grips me close, fingers splayed on my back, thumb stroking my skin through the flimsy silk blouse and honestly, this is stupid. 

You’re stupid. And horny. 

Nothing good in that equation. Leave , you’re going to mess up. 

I stumble away a bit and make a noise of impatience. 

 Getting late, you’re going to get fired...

“What do you want?” i say confused , mildly excited, mildly flustered, but mostly scared that he’s going to know just how badly I’m attracted to him at this moment. Fuck, he smells like heaven on legs, a sort of musky male scent and evergreen pine. How long has it been since i slept with anyone anyway? 

That kid outside the EXO concert who’d looked a bit too much like Kai. That was months ago. I could use a break. Finals were around the corner anyway. 

“You take good pictures. i checked out some of your work. i like your work “ His voice is low and serious and his eyes tell me he’s being sincere.

My heart leaps. It’s him. He’s the pone who left the note. 

“Hmm... Thanks . Is that all you like?” I smile. 

I’m being a bit too reckless , i know. But my brain’s kind of on a hiatus right now. I haven’t eaten or slept well in what felt like years, actually.

“Whose your favorite member?” He teases, and i resist the urge to smile. 

This is going to get a bit tiring. Better give him what he wants, seeing as it is what i want.

What every girl wants. 

“You know damn well, you’re the only one I see.” I say, softly, finally forcing myself to look up at him and this close, I can count his eyelashes. The coal black smudge of eyeliner and the sharp glint of eyes that see way more than what i want to show. 

He takes a deep breath and let’s it go.

His fingers reach out, lightly curled as he tips my chin up till I’m staring right into his face. 

“Can I get a kiss? You’re so beautiful...” He whispers.

And when his lips close over mine, there’s not even an ounce of surprise. Mostly, it’s just an odd sort of resignation. I’ve never done this before but i’ve heard enough stories, fans who get to sleep with their idols, special girls who get picked out of the crowd for one magical night with the man of their dreams. The chance to touch and kiss and make love to the most untouchable of people. 

And this guy has seen my photographs, I try to tell myself. He likes my work. That’s validation right there. Something i’ve been chasing all my life. so why not let him give it to me, right? 

yet, somehow it seems oddly anti climactic and even before he pulls me up, kisses me breathless and mutters something about “ Let me take you to the dorm...... it’s only a short drive “, i know that I don’t really want it, as much as I  want to want it. 

 And , even before he pulls me into the darkened confines of his room and tugs on the zipper of my dress, even before he pushes me into his bed and kisses his way across my body,  I start regretting it. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When I come back to my senses, the sunlight is filtering in through expensive white curtains, weak winter light that isn’t strong enough to brush away the cobwebs of regret oozing into my conscience. i want to die. My mouth feels like something’s crawled in and died there and  , the bed is starkly empty, with a min yoongi shaped impression on the mattress that tells me that, yes, I had sex with the lead rapper from Bangtan Sonyeondan. 

I’m screwed. 

In every possible way. 

i stumble out and the first thing that strikes me is that my dress is gone. It’s literally not there. I stumble around in my bra and panties, looking for the shirt blouse and the skirt but no luck. Fuck. Finally, after half an hour of searching which yields my skirt but not my blouse  , i decide to grab a t shirt out of the closet, well aware that there are voices in the living space. 

Familiar voices. 

The rest of the band. 

 Jumping out of the window seems like a good idea. 

Groaning, I grab the smallest looking t shirt and slip it on, well aware how ridiculous it looks with my formal zipped up skirt. But beats walking out with a blanket on. Sighing, i stare at my reflection. i don’t look too bad. 

I’m actually  pretty. More than pretty when I’m making an effort. With the right motivation, i could look beautiful but after countless days chasing beauty through my lens, I’ve sort of lost interest in mimicking it. 

I brush a hand through my hair and take a deep breath, staring at my phone. it’s dead. I ‘m going to get fired. And my roommate is probabaly freaking the hell out. Sighing, i push the door open and step out. 

“No one wants to hear you screwing another girl in there , yoongi can’t you keep it-” Seokjin stops short when he realizes it’s not Yoongi who’s stepping out. 

I regret my very existence as i stand there stupidly. 

“I’m sorry.. I just... My phone’s dead... I really need to call a cab. “ i say stiltedly, not sure who to look at . There’s Seokjin and Taehyung on the dining table, Taehyung looking bored and Seokjin m ortified and wow, okay, Kim Taehyung in real life is blinding. 

I swallow and look away. 

“You need money?”

The voice is right behind me, at my shoulder and i startle, stumbling back. unfamiliar fingers curl around my shoulders steadying me and i flinch at the harsh grip, before the guy lets go and i turn around. 

Kim Namjoon. 

i feel my breath catch , because okay, it’s a bit of a secret but he’s the one i’d always liked photographing the most. He’s beautiful in an intensely masculine way. There’s nothing remotely soft about him: no sloping shoulders, silky sogft hair or curved cheeks like the rest of his bandmates. Namjoon is all angular planes and sharp edges. 

Except for those twin dimples, elusive and gorgeous. 

He looks different off stage, more relaxed and slightly ...  furious?

“ didn’t hyung pay you yet? is that why you’re still here?” He says casually and i went still.

What now? 

“I..I’m not... i mean.. I’m a photographer... I... I just came home with Yoongi because..” I bit my lips, still groggy, “ I’m not a.. “ I stop talking, feeling stupid. And insulted.

but mostly hurt. 

Wasn’t he supposed to be the role model, here? The leader? There was no way he didn’t recognize me. Or maybe i was just being delusional.

But whether he recognized me or not, why treat me like that? Did he not ever bring girls home?! 

i really didn’t want to stay breathing the same air as him.  

“I’ll go.” i sayquickly. 

“Keep the shirt. I doubt he wants it back.” Namjoon snaps, stalking over to the front floor and holding it open.

And just as I stepped past him, face burning with humiliation , he whispers, 

“You know you’re not special right? Know how many of those t-shirts are around seoul right now?” He sneers. 

I grit my teeth. 

“Nice to meet you too, Kim Namjoon ssi.” 

Author’s note : Sorry Anon, I know that this is1oo% not what you wanted but ugh, bear with me... :( I swear it will get better... 

#bts fanfics #bts namjoon #bts min yoongi

[dahcyst]

A Flower for the Bee [Chapter 6]

[AO3 link : http://archiveofourown.org/works/9238850/chapters/21205610]

The next day, Yuri had waken up with some difficulties. He hadn't drunk last night for his birthday, as he was still underage for the two incoming years, but going home so late after the small party had just left him dead in his bed. Dealing with J.J. had been quite weird and totally impossible. Dark eyes had been looking down on him when he'd tried to get the man's cellphone, and the smirk on J.J.'s face was really pissing him off. Victor had soon stopped both them, claiming the phone as his -and it actually was true: J.J. hadn't been using his own cell the whole night and Yuri learned later that Victor had lent an old one of his to the Canadian. It seemed that his coming from so far wasn't that prepared as he hadn't made the advances for a journey phone credit.  

He'd tried to ask Victor –more or less roughly, violently, even threatened the man, but the skater never returned the phone, and didn't even bother answer to Yuri's rude words.  

"None of my business, boys," he'd said despite the protests.  

After that, the party hadn't last for long, and Yakov had drove him back home; it appeared that J.J.  was really sleeping at Victor's during his stay. At the end of the evening (or the early morning? He wasn't sure), the man looked pretty exhausted and Yuri had suddenly remembered the huge jet lag between Russia and Canada. It was already quite impressive that J.J. had survived that entire time –or maybe he'd taken a nap in the afternoon before taking him to Victor's place.  

Speacking of J.J., Yuri hadn't seen any pictures of the small party on Instagram, Twitter, Facebook, Tumblr...He'd checked Victor's, J.J.'s, aven Yakov's account even though the old man wasn't one to take pictures and didn't quite understand how to upload a photograph, let alone make a publication alone. He used to ask Georgi or Mila when he needed some help.  

J.J.'s accounts on social medias didn't have anything new published since...Days. Weeks. It had made Yuri frown a little since J.J. had always been someone who posted a lot of things –especially things that made others feel like they wanted to punch him right in the face, and especially Yuri. But the last thing Yuri saw in tCanadian's feed was that selfie Isabella and him had taken together at the end of their wedding. He was still wearing her white veil, her dark hair hair tied up in an amazing bun that Yuri was petty sure it had taken hours to make due to the lack of lenght.  

"Wow, got new clothes?"  

At Mila's words, Yuri raised his eyes up to her as he was lacing his skates and nodded silently. With that gaze of hers, he knew that she was aware of what had happened the night before –or at least about that gift. Did she knew about Otabek, the incoming duet and why she was training so much with him lately?  

"You look a bit tired, is it gonna be ok today?" She asked sitting near on the same bench.  

"I'll go easy for today," he sighed. "Yakov's been pretty irresponsable for once, taking me home soooo late..."  

He knew for sure that Victor wouldn't be here in the morning : the man was a heavy sleeper and knowing that J.J. was at his place didn't help with that feeling. Before leaving his phone on the bench with his towel, Yuri gave an eye in his mailbox in case he would get a new message from Otabek. He actually hadn't been sleeping right away after getting home last night, sending some words to the Kazakh. The man had answered almost immediatly, putting his nerves to the edge. For God's sake, when was he even sleeping!?

 Yura : "When are you coming in Moscow then?"

   Ota-bee : "By the end of the week, I'll tell you"

   Yura : "Ok then"

Oh man. It had kept him from sleeping for a good couple of hours more and he wasn't sure if he had even sleep a complete hour that night. His brain was feeling like dead, not running properly to his liking –he didn't have strenght enough to answer back Mila's bad jokes. His body was painful enough to make him grunt even more than usually. But the idea of skating with Otabek Altin was somehow worth it. Well, not somehow. The simple thought of being able to stand by his side on the ice made his heart jolt and beat so hard that he wasn't sure if it was due to the excitment or the tireness or anything.  

Mila laughed gently, then patted his head with her thin hand. "You're a lot on your phone lately," she said. "Finally got a girlfriend?"  

Before he could even think about his answer, Yuri gave her a dark death glare as he was leaving his phone screen for a few seconds. "What?"  

"Wow, don't look at me like that, you're scary!"  

"Your fault! What kind of nonsense are you saying!?" Yuri spit. He had tightened his grip on the frame of his phone, his thumb pushing pretty fast on the main button to darken the screen. But she grinned anyway; he hadn't been quick enough for it not to be noticed.  

"Sooooo, what's her name?" She continued.  

Yuri grit his teeth. "There's no 'her', stupid!"  

She opened her eyes wild. "Oh! That's a 'he' then? I didn't know you were into guys!"  

Yuri coughed pretty hard at her suggestion and the lace slip off his hands as he was giving her the most threatening gaze of his. Or at least he tried but the sudden heat all other his face wasn't  helping and he wasn't sure if being red to the ears was something convincing enough against Mila.  

"WHAT!?"

"What 'what'?" She shrugged. "Aren't you?"

"I'M NOT GAY OF COURSE YOU DUMBASS!"  

The silence that fell between the two of them suddenly took him deep and he felt a heavy lump forming in his throat as Mila was staring at him. Her gaze was as curious as puzzled. The few people not so far around the rink had turned their attention toward them and it made him feel pretty bad. But the young woman soon sighed softly, standing slowly.  

"Yeah," she simply said. "You're not, of course. Sorry if I've upset you, okay?"  

Once again this week, Yuri felt the guilt taking him deep in his stomach. Mila's features had suddenly changed and if he didn't know why, he knew it was because of what he'd just said. That subject was something he'd never really thought about. A girlfriend, or even a boyfriend, weren't something that had their place in his life right now. He didn't have enough time or energy for such things –let alone nobody was interesting enough in his current daily life to even consider the idea.  

"O-okay," he mumbled.  

She quickly left, gone for a little warm-up on the ice and Yuri sighed, pushing again on the button of his cellphone to enlight the screen again. Otabek was online and he counted. It was something like lunch time for the Kazakh and he didn't even got surprised when the picture of a plate full of letuce and chicken suddenly appeared in their conversation.  

 Ota-bee : "Seriously I feel like a girl on a diet"  

Yuri hardly held his laughter back.  

 Yura : "wtf why are you eating that?"  

   Ota-bee : "Coach said so?"

   Yura : "don't tell me you're one to listen to your coach!"

   Ota-bee : "why not, it worked pretty well till now"

Yuri stared at it for a few good seconds, trying to imagine Otabek purposely doing whatever his coach would be asking him to do. Was his body, his final frame, his strength, the result of what his coach had decided? Or did Otabek himself asked for this. Their was something that Yuri knew about Otabek: his skills on the ice were ones that had make Victor coming back in competition, and for this the Kazakh was a serious rival. He had't been the only one to be that reason, of course, just a part of the story, but still. Victor had taken an interest on the young man –or, more specifically, his body.  

Yuri sighed.  

 Yura : "ok ok why not"

   Ota-bee : "How is your training btw?"

   Yura : "terrible"

   Ota-bee : "?"

   Yura : "wanna sleep"

   Ota-bee : "Ahah same to be honest"

He caught himself smiling at the written laughter; he coud imagine the soft giggle from the man, the dimples at the corner of his mouth and his eyes, sweet and dark at the same time as he would be shaking his head a little.  

 Yura : "Take a nap dumbass"

   Ota-bee : "I will"

   Ota-bee : "but it's kind of crowded here now"

   Yura : "Really?"  

   Ota-bee : "Yeah small demo this afternoon"

   Ota-bee : "Hope I won's sleep on the ice lol"

Yuri huffed a little at the unusual 'lol' at the end of the message. It wasn't so...Not Otabek? The man wasn't one to use that type of shortcut –most of the time he typed full sentences, except sometimes when he was in a rush or something that kept him from being able to take his time to write properly on his cellphone.  

 Yura: "sleep now then?"

   Ota-bee : "no way"

   Yura : "man, you're stupid?"

   Ota-bee : "We are chatting, i don't want to sleep now"

Yuri had suddenly been holding his breath and the only thing that made him inspire again was Mila's call for him. Oh dears. What could he honestly answer to this when he only wanted to be a few days ahead of now?  

 Yura : "I'm off see you"

Then he shove his phone between his folded towel layers to hide it at least a little and decided to finally join the young woman. What was that, seriously? Yuri didn't like what he'd just done, leaving Otabek so suddenly when the man had just said...Uh. Well, when he'd just said that. Had the Kazakh absolutly no pride to be able to say such a thing to a friend?  

"Hey Yuuuuriiiii!" Mila called again.  

With a deep sigh and a grimace at his painful articulations when he'd stand up, Yuri reached the young woman. Mila's hair was finally long enough to tie it up in a very small ponytail and it showed up her so little ears. With her pale skin and puckish blue eyes, let alone her deviish smile and than damn body of her, the boy was pretty sure she was incredibly attractive and might have tons of suitors. But he'd never seen her with someone until now.  

She watched him coming, hands on her hips and tsk'ed a little at him, making the blond raise a eyebrow. "Boy, you look sooo down! Are you really tired?"  

"I already fucking told you, Mila! They trapped me last night in Victor's apartment! I've barely slept, I'm DEAD, how can't you get something so simple?"

She laughed a little at his mad expression. "Right, riiiiight!"  

Cheeks red from being suddenly annoyed, Yuri mumbled and started sliding on the ice to get used to the thing again during a few seconds. Here. Like that. He needed that. He wanted that soft feeling of air brushing his face, his body suddenly so light as it was heading straight on this line. His knees were still as fuck, the dull pain irradiating from his articulations to the muscles of his thights. Sometimes, it was unbearable and he wondered how he still hadn't given up on all that shit.  

Georgi soon joined them in the training. The man wasn't preparing the new season. If he hadn't retired, his life had slightly changed since he met his new girlfriend and to be honest, his personnality was way smoother than when he was dating that superficial Anya.  

"Hey, Yuri!" Georgi suddenly called.  

The boy stopped strenching his body at the sound of his voice and turned his attention to him. The man was scratching his head and slid with curiosity near Yuri before suddenly grabbing his sides with both hands. He earned a surprised sound.  

"GEOR--"

"Are you injured or something?" He simply asked.  

Yuri blinked a little. "What?"

Georgi was frowning a little, visibly concerned. "Aren't you?" He continued. "I thought so, your skating is quite different lately."

The blond Russian froze a little at Georgi's words. Was it so obvious that something was happening? Had he been so freacking bad that even Georgi had noticed? Not hat Georgi was a bad skater, not at all, but he wasn't one to really care about others' way of skating.  

Yuri swallowed the lump in his throat with some difficulties. "I...Might have some cramps," he lied. Or rather, it wasn't completly a lie. He was, at least, admitting that something wasn't really ok. Georgi raised an eyebrow.  

"Aaahh, I was right then! Since when? Is it painful? You skate a little as if you had, uh, well..."

"As if I had what?"

"A tree up in your ass, actually."  

Yuri stared at the man for a moment, not sure if he had really heard what he had just heard. But Georgi was still standing before him, intensively thinking about the situation.  

"What the fuck did you say?"

"Oh, I mean, you still skate like a damn goddess –DON'T LOOK AT ME LIKE THAT, you were the prima ballerina after all!"  

"SPIT IT ALREADY POPOVITCH!"

"But that's a bit weird, I mean, you're stiff and all that, like, well, I mean, that's just why I'm asking? You look so uncomfortable with your body right now, that's the weirdest thing I've ever seen from you!"

"Shitty bast--"  

But Mila's hand suddenly on the top of his head stopped Yurio in his incoming colorful cursing litany toward Georgi. Her fingers were cold and her looks concerned.  

"What?" He growled.  

But she only shrugged a little with a small odd smile –and for once he was prtty sure it wasn't made out of pity.  

"Georgi, go train somewhere else," she said. "And leave us some room, ok?"  

"What the...Yeah, ok, ok!"  

The man mumbled when she scowled him a death glare, and Yuri could swear that he wouldn't have looked better himself at that 'dark eyes' game. Once Georgi was gone, or at least far away enough for her liking, she turned back to him.  

"So..." She grinned at the boy, stretching a little on place, arms above her head. "What can't you do anymore?"

Yuri frowned deeply. "I didn't say I--"

"I said," she cut out. "What can't you do anymore?"  

He clenched his jaw, almost painfully, silent for a few good seconds as she was staring at him. "Mila, I--"

"Don't you want to dance with Otabek?"  

The question suddenly went out, lingering in the air for a moment as he froze. Before he knew it, she had put her arm around his neck, body close enough to his and wa whispering to hi ear. Her breath was hot, like damn, how could she be like that when the place was made of ice?  

"I'm here to teach you, Yuri," she murmured. "So, don't you want it? Dancing with him? Do you really think that you're powerful enough to be paired with the guy?"  

Powerful was the word. Yuri gulped despite himself at the memory of the srong body evoluating on the ice and Mila scoffed a little at his discreet reaction.  

"Now, you'd only be a pain in the ass for him, ok? You don't fit his style at all, and as I'm the one who know the choreo, I can tell that you have a lot to do in such a few time, baby tiger..."  

She laughed a little more openly at his decomposed expression, especially when his green eyes were looking for an escape on her face. She suddenly burst into a huge laughter this time, and gave a big hit in his back with her hand, making his cough so hard that he thought he was going to spit out his lungs.  

"Don't make such a face, babe!" She said. From the distance, Georgi was giving them a curious look, full with his lack of understanding. She didn't give him any attention.  

Yuri sighed, this time without holding hmself back. As tired as he was, Mila's words had made their way to his brain and he could feel the hint of excitment making his guts twitch with need.  

"Why are you doing this?" He asked.  

"Victor told me," she shrugged and he winced a little. "Plus, it's pretty funny to see you in this situation. And somehow..."  

She leaned a little, back to his ear. Her nose brushed against his lob and he gulped softly at the feeling. Dears.  

"...I wonder how Otabek would answer to such a strong and amazing danse with you, don't you?"

#fanfiction #yaoi #yurionice #otabek #altin #yurio #yuri #plisetsky #otayuri