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#anyway idk feel free to let me know ur thoughts
vhvrs · 1 year
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umm actually if we have polls now can i run an interest check for something lol.
edit: it wont let me add a poll in a reblog rip anyways:
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strxbrymochi · 2 months
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i know im quite late but this has been stuck in my head and i need to get it out so here are my 12am impulse thoughts,,,
how i imagine nct dream would be on valentine's day;
note: this is just the vibes i get from seeing them and 100% based on my delusional imagination
mark;
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i am extra delulu for this man rn its so bad
i feel like he would be such a wholesome valentine date
straight up imagined some sort of serenading going on bc hello guitar skills?? and his voice??
i'd imagine he'd gift you some sort of designer thing (just cause i think he's the type to spoil u for special occasions bc ur his girl yk screams)
i think good food = good talks = just enjoying each other's company; type of guy i genuinely feel like you can have hour hour hours long convos and not get bored
lots of laughs bc hearing his laugh >>>
feel more home date vibes where you take out your fave foods and just jam out love songs in pjs but i can also see late night walks or going to some lowkey resto so yalls dont get spotted
renjun;
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this guy is for real a deep down romantic aint no way with that face and attitude have you seen how he speaks to some of the dreamies??
defs would serenade u if u ask him to (imagine him shy at first but giving it his all aww)
hands down will gift u something he custom made i do not doubt this given he made custom hoodies for the rest of dream but yours defo will be extra special and made with care <3
can imagine some sort of art date or a quiet night for the two of yalls, him spoiling u a bit cause valentines is extra reason to do so
honestly if i was on a date w him i'd just stare at him ... oops
i think u guys should do the "draw each other" trend as a gift and ur drawing of him looks horrendous (bc u are not as gifted in the arts-- if you are good for u) while his of you looks majestic but he keeps it anyways bc u made it (hearing his beautiful laugh makes it worth ut too anyways)
jeno;
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ok look i think jeno's v acts of service-y
wouldn't question if he attempts to cook for you or do things for you a lot more often on valentines to show his love for u (wake up to meals and a clean house yessir-- only for today tho GAHAHAHAHA)
another one i think would spoil you with designer stuff and just imagine the little cute smile on his face when he watched you open the gifts cause he's out here looking at u w pure genuine love (must be nice)
my man's a gamer would probs challenge u to a game or two before heading out
ice cream !!!!!! i have seen 2 vlogs w him looking for and eating ice cream i think you guys will defs have an ice cream taster or smtg (he's so me!!)
idk bro i love jeno any boyfriend fantasy i have in my dreams is played out by him. TT
haechan;
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nah yea atp they'd all spoil you (pls dream is full of loving green forest men)
i can imagine deep talks about your future together like wouldnt be surprised if mans doesnt just propose to you alr thats how much he loves you
clingy clingy boy and he is not afraid to show you and let you know how much he loves u !
would hands down take you to the BEST restos and yalls would have insanely good food
can see some karaoke or bowling or idk just an activity yalls can do together before going home for a quiet night of the talks and just enjoying each other's presence
where do i find one genuine question
jaemin;
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royalty treatment all the way
breakfast in bed: check with four course meal, flowers: check, gifts: check, chore-free house: check say less
i feel like jaemin is a very big words of affirmation guy so he will not stop complimenting you or saying he loves you
takes a lot of pictures of you too
yk also i think he'd actually send his mom flowers for valentine's day too
staring at you for hours with that stupid cute grin of his, eyes full of adoration
would have all your wants and preferences memorised hes so attentive you actually dont need to worry or do anything all day (just appreciate it bc u deserve him and his love!!!)
chenle;
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(there were like no chenle gifs wtf)
PRESIDENT ZHONG CHENLE!!!!! money moves fr name what u want and u got it, spoiled level 1000 on valentine's day
if he could go around freely i think he's the type to take you to fancy ass restaurants like those rich hotel ones (but like if not that's ok he'll spoil you through other means)
he's a menace sometimes i think he'd joke around and try to get on your nerves a bit for fun like imagine him rocking up and being like what day is it today? oh it's valentine's? what's that idk what that is. was i meant to do smtg for u? (him and haechan fr would be the type to tease u so bad) all that just for laughs i can alr imagine the look on his face
as sweet as he is i think at one point he'd either make you do smtg so stupid w him or get a random ass matching present just for the lols (he rlly doesn't gaf he's so real and u love him for it)
jisung;
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my sweet sweet child (we're like the same age)
i feel like he'd be so babie trying to prep everything and making sure everything is perfect for u awwwie
tries to act all tough and cool but melts on the inside, compliment him once he shows that smile of his and he's down forever
would be the type to get advice from his hyungs on what to do but be so shy when asked (sksks hes adorable pls)
i feel like he would make you a custom gift like something you can take w u always but also get u something expensive idk unless ur not into that stuff GAHAHA
IMAGINE he tries cooking for u but oblivious kiddo ended up burning it but its ok he tried, yalls got takeout instead
OK ALSO think him trying to teach u how to dance that'd be so cute or yalls can end it w a movie just in each other's presence and u fall asleep next to each other on the couch (BYE SO CUTE IM DED)
ok that's it im done i need to sleep good night (stay delulu besties <3)
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auras-moonstone · 9 months
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someone requested this but i lost it😫😫 the request asked me to write a story about reader being a streamer and jack and her meeting through one of mason’s streams. i hope you like it! 💖
locked up in your arms — jack champion
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word count: 1,581
pairing: jack champion x streamer!fem!reader
summary: y/n’s crush gets exposed during her stream with mason, but luckily he feels the same.
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Y/N HAD STARTED HER TWITCH CHANNEL PURELY FOR FUN, NEVER EXPECTING SO MUCH PEOPLE TO START FOLLOWING HER. She did pretty much everything—reactions to movies, music, chatting, occasionally gameplays. People were instantly drawn in by her charm, kindness and sense of humor.
And Mason Gooding had been one of them. He absolutely loved her channel, so when he saw Y/N was a huge fan of the Scream movies, he didn’t hesitate to reach out and asked her to do a stream with him. She, of course, said yes. The viewers loved their dynamic, and their shared streams became something they did weekly.
“You have gotten so much better at this game” Mason said as they finished playing Dead By Daylight.
Y/N grimaced “Sure, I still suck. I mean, my gaming experience starts and ends with the Sims”
Mason laughed, and was about to respond when the sound of his phone interrupted him. “Jack Champion just texted”
The girl gulped, hoping that the mic didn’t catch that. To say she had a crush on that actor was an understatement. Her face turned a dark shade of red, and prayed that it wouldn’t be that noticeable through the camera.
“He says, Mason tell the people I say you’re a sussy baka” the streamer read the text, trying not to laugh.
“Did he just say sussy baka?” Y/N pressed her lips together.
“Don’t make fun of my boy!” Mason warned her.
“I’m not! I thought it was ador- hilarious” holy shit she almost said he was adorable.
“And tell Y/N the Sims is a great game, and I bet she builds beautiful houses” Mason continued.
“I do build beautiful houses. Thank you, Jack!” she said, glad the stutter didn’t come into play.
oh god y/n is about to go into cardiac arrest
hey! don’t expose her lmaooo
girl is crushing hard
didn’t we know she had a crush on jack already??? have you seen her scream 6 reaction???
omg yes she totally thirsted over him for two hours straight.
Mason bursted out laughing at the comments. “I need to see your Scream reaction holy shit. Why did no one ever tell me?”
“They’re exaggerating” they weren’t. “And drop it! You’re not seeing the reaction”
“I so am” Mason said. “In fact, why don’t we react to your reaction?”
“Why don’t we end the stream and never talk again?” she frowned, acting annoyed.
“You’re so adorable!” he laughed. Mason actually thought she and Jack would make an excellent couple, and he was so going to make that happen. “Anyways, that was the end of an eventful stream. Now we gotta go, Y/N needs to put ice on her cheeks”
“I hate you” she said as she ended the video call.
Mason texted her a few minutes after the stream ended.
hey ur not mad at me, are u?
no, i’m not. i just am a little bit embarassed
now everyone knows about my crush
did jack say something? pls tell me he was not watching the stream anymore.
i don’t know. he didn’t say anything, so maybe he left before you exposed yourself
very funny
anyways he’s going to find out. people are for sure sending the clips 😫😫
why are you so worried?
it’s not like you’re going to meet him.
no i know
but idk, i don’t want him to think i’m a weirdo
for having a crush??
don’t be silly. he won’t, jack is the sweetest guy on earth.
okay fine
maybe you’re right
i’m overthinking as always :)
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MASON ALMOST LET OUT A SCREAM OF EXCITEMENT WHEN THE TEXT ARRIVED. He had been pretty much hopeless about his plan, so he was caught off guard when Jack told him he was going to LA that weekend. Now, there was one last thing to do.
hey y/n/n
hey mason what’s up?
are you free this saturday??
yeah why?
devyn, jasmine and jenna are dying to meet you, so they told me to invite you :)
we’re doing a picnic!!
yess i’d love to!
GREAT I’M SO EXCITED
why?
BECAUSE😬😬
you’re so weird
thank you
see ya on saturday
Mason couldn’t shake the smile off his face as he opened the group chat he had with Jasmine, Jenna and Devyn.
she’s coming!!!
the ship is about to sail!!! 🚢
she’s going to hate me but it’ll be worthy
i still can’t believe how red she turned during the stream. she’s absolutely adorable
okay but can we talk about how smiley jack was when we showed him the clips???? he’s down bad too
that’s why i’m doing it. i wouldn’t if i weren’t sure they are attracted each other.
i can’t wait till saturday😫 they’re going to be so cute!!!!
he’s going to kill her with adorableness with his dad jokes
he already killed her with the sussy baka thing. i can’t believe he said that. he’s lucky he’s pretty
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Y/N, AT THE SAME TIME MASON WAS TEXTING ON THE GROUP, OPENED THE MESSAGES APP. She had a huge smile on her face as she texted.
he really thinks he’s being a mastermind 😭😭😭 it’s so funny
i know 😭 i bet he’s planning everything on the gc with the girls. he has no idea. i feel powerful😎
you are so cute 😫 i can’t wait to hug tf out of you
cute? so, in your scream reactions you call me hot and say you’d be lucky to have been one of my victims and irl you call me CUTE? 🙄
you’re not ethan landry, jack
he’s top 1 on my love of my life list
what place am i in?
third
THIRD?? who’s second? 🥺
taylor swift
oh yeah. should’ve figured.
well, to make you feel bad, you’re in my top 1.
i don’t feel bad at all, jack
oh… well okay. i am totally fine being in your top 3, tbh. at least i made it.
NOW i feel bad😫
i really want to hug you, like the thought of it brings me butterflies
just a couple of hours left ❤️❤️
we have two entire days alone before we meet with the group
i can’t wait to see your pretty face in person🥹🥹
ughhhhhh
stop being so sweet when you’re not here😫😫
i’ll see you in exactly 8 hours :)
good night gorgeous 💕
night pretty boy 💖
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Y/N STOOD IN FRONT OF THE METAL STAIRCASE, WITH A SIGN THAT SAID LOVE OF MY LIFE #3. She offered Jack to pick him up from the airport, so there she was, waiting anxiously for her boy.
She couldn’t believe it was actually happening. They had been talking for a while now—he sent her a dm only a few days after the stream, and had been talking non-stop ever since. Both of them have been open about their feelings for each other, as they were pretty obvious, and they basically acted like a couple. Even though that had never met in person, until now.
Jack’s heart stopped when he caught sight of the beautiful girl with the sign, which made him laugh a lot. He pushed through the people, muttering quick so sorry’s until he reached her. Y/N was looking up at him attentively, as if trying to take in every detail about him. The sparks in her eyes made his stomach go crazy.
“You’re real” he breathed.
“I mean, there’s this theory that we are actually characters in some big videogam-“
Jack grabbed her by the cheeks to pull her close to him, so their foreheads were touching. His smile could literally light up a whole town “You can tell me all about your interesting theories, which you know I love to hear. But right now I’m deciding if I should kiss you or hug you”
“In that order, please” she said, completely wonderstrucked by his close presence.
And so they kissed. Y/N found out Jack was a slow kisser, which she absolutely enjoyed because she never wanted that magnificent kiss to end. And Jack discovered Y/N was very touchy—her hands wouldn’t stay in just one place, but she explored every inch of visible skin.
“Now I want my hug” she said after a couple of seconds of trying to recover her breath. Jack threw his head back laughing before embracing her in the so awaited hug. “Yup, never leaving these arms” she squished her cheek against his chest.
The grip around her shoulders tightened “Thank god, cause I didn’t know how to tell you that you’re now forever trapped in here”.
“Um, could you please move?” one old woman said.
Y/N sighed as they pulled away “Taylor Swift was right when she said forever is the sweetest con”
“I’m sorry. You two are really adorable but I want to get home already” the woman said.
“No, it’s okay. We’re sorry” Y/N smiled kindly.
“Let us help you with your baggage” Jack offered, taking one of the suitcases while Y/N grabbed one of her bags.
“How long have you two been together?” the woman asked as they walked her to a taxi.
“Oh-uh…” Y/N wasn’t sure what to say. She wanted to think they were together even though they never said the word ‘boyfriend’ and ‘girlfriend’.
“Three months” Jack spoke up. “We live in different states, but we talk everyday. We never made it official, but in case you were wondering, and this is for you too Y/N/N, I feel that we are a couple”
The woman looked at Y/N, waiting for her answer. The girl smiled brightly, feeling the weight of her heart evaporating “I feel that way too, Jack”.
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imaginespazzi · 2 months
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Part 1: Don't Be A Stranger
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Masterlist - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5
But if (my) world was ending, you'd come over right?
(In which UCLA anon's roman empire became this writer's roman empire and we've finally reached the beginning)
Pairing: Paige Bueckers X Azzi Fudd
Themes: Angst, Pining, Hurt/Comfort and a little bit of Fluff
Words: 8.4 K (other parts will be shorter....maybe)
TW: Swearing, Alcohol, Injuries, Alludes to Sexual Content
A/N: Hello my lovelies <3 Gonna keep this as short and sweet as possible but we've finally, finally gotten to the UCLA fic. A huge shout out to UCLA anon, because this is their master idea. Couple of things, I've never been to LA or UCLA and therefore some things are out of whack. The timeline is also a little out of whack but I swear I will try to keep it as consistent as possible. In the mean time, just ignore some of the inconsistencies pretty please. As always, feel free to let me know what's bad, what's good and what else you'd like to see. I hope y'all enjoy this first part and let's get another W today!
August 2021
where are you 
i literally have to be at the airport in an hour paige where are you 
dude 
are you on your way?
you better be driving and that’s why you’re not answering 
PAIGE
i’m sorry about last night i shouldn’t have said that 
but you said a lot of shit too so call it even?
this isn’t funny where are you?
i have to leave in 15 mins 
are you actually not coming?
wtf????
this is actually bullshit
get over yourself bueckers 
wow 
fuck you
just landed 
thought you might like to know 
sorry my plane didn’t crash i guess 
September 2021
dude enough okay 
can you just call me back??
i just wanna talk 
i know you're mad i get it but i miss you   
November 2021 
hi i’mma be in dc over christmas
nvm 
idk why i’m trying again  
maybe i should block you 
this is kinda pathetic of me what the fuck 
December 2021
i thought i saw you today but idk
couldn’t have been you cause if it was 
would you really not even say hi?
i’m done trying paige 
merry christmas i guess
March 2022 
i misz you 
lyke a wot
love uuuuu pppppp
even if ur a bwtich 
pkese pick up 
ignore that 
people drunk text exes apparently i drunk text you 
wait 
i don’t need to tell you that 
you already ignore it all anyways
 
August 2022 
i heard about the acl 
i’m sorry 
idk if it means anything, but if you wanna talk
nvm 
***
September 2022 
When the doorbell rings, on a quiet Thursday afternoon during a rare moment of alone time, Paige expects it to be a lot of people. One of her parents deciding that they actually weren’t going to leave her alone. Someone else in her family showing up out of the blue to provide comfort. Maybe one of her teammates popping up to keep her entertained. She even thinks it might be some random fan who got too invested and figured out the address for her air BnB. It’s the saddest testament to how broken they are, that the idea of it being Azzi Fudd standing outside her door, never once crosses her mind. But there she is, when Paige opens the door, dressed in ripped jean shorts and a light blue tank top, the girl that had been her best friend, and maybe a little bit more. 
Silence stretches between them as Azzi fidgets with her hands and Paige continues to stoically stare at her. It’s been almost a year since they’ve seen each other, even longer since they’d last shared a happy smile. And you’d have to go back to before she’d told her about her future plans, to find the last time Azzi had properly looked Paige in the eyes.  
“Hi,” Azzi says finally, mustering up a small smile. Paige doesn’t know if hearing that voice, soft and subdued but still so familiar, fixes a crack or breaks her heart even further. She wills herself to be polite in response, to match Azzi’s polite greeting with a greeting of her own. But there’s clear discord between her mouth and her head, because her words are harsh and hollowed. 
“What are you doing here?”
Azzi swallows, smile disappearing as she immediately digs her fingernails into her palms and Paige feels the guilt settle into her stomach. It’s like the night before all over again. If she closes her eyes, Paige can still hear her voice loudly echoing in Azzi’s childhood bedroom. She can hear the angry words that she’d hurled at her best friend, each one like a well-aimed arrow piercing the other’s girl's heart and tearing into Paige’s own soul. Some would call what she’d done self-preservation. She’d call it her biggest mistake. 
“I um-,” Azzi sucks in her bottom lip, “I was in the area and thought, maybe I’d check in.”
“How did you even know where I was?” Paige hates how cold and accusatory her voice sounds. It’s a version of herself she doesn’t quite know how to deal with, one that hasn’t ever appeared for anyone other than the girl in front of her, “I know I didn’t tell you.”
Any semblance of calm is gone from Azzi’s face, as she seems to realise that she’s not going to be getting any cordiality from her old friend. 
 “And we’re off to a great start,” she mutters under her breath before replying to Paige’s exact question, “no you didn’t. Your dad-”
“You talked to my dad?”
“Yeah. I mean you know Drew looks up to Jon and José so much and they still talk and stuff and he came over- Drew I mean- and then your dad was there and we just got to talking and you came up and yeah. He told me and well I live here, kinda, so I thought- well I thought maybe you’d like some company?”
As Azzi’s rambling explanation comes to an end, Paige doesn’t miss the tinge of hopefulness in her voice at the last bit. The younger girl shuffles her feet, as she stares at the blonde expectantly. 
“I don’t-” Paige struggles to draw in a breath as the voices in her head argue, “I don’t think that’s a good idea.”
Her words are met with silence as Azzi stares at her blankly. 
“I- you,” she blinks rapidly, clearly at a loss for what to say at the blatant rejection, “I can’t come in?”
“It’s just- I’ve had a lot of people visit you know,” Paige bullshits, suddenly feeling very exhausted, “and my family were here a couple days and my friends are coming soon and-”
“And I’m neither of those things,” Azzi says, her tone low and breathy. 
“That’s not what-”
“It is,” Azzi closes her eyes for a brief second, when she opens them, the flash of hurt in them feels like a dagger through Paige’s chest, “it is like that and it is what you meant and it’s- it’s fine.”
“Az-” Paige chokes out, feeling her lungs collapse when the other girl moves to leave, “please,” and she’s not even sure she’s asking for, but it’s not this. It’s never been this.
Azzi stops and when she turns back around, there’s a determined look on her face.
“I just-” she rubs her face, composing herself before focusing her eyes on Paige, “you’re the strongest person I know. And you’re going to come back from this, better than ever. I know it. The whole world knows it. Because you’re Paige Bueckers. You’re something else.  You’re the hardest worker, you’re just- you’re the best.”
“You don’t-”
“Just- just let me finish okay and then, then I’ll go or whatever but Paige, you’re all of those things you know? Strong, brave, the best fucking player- but, it’s also okay if sometimes-, if sometimes you aren’t. It’s okay because this- this is hard, I know it is. So if sometimes you’re not strong or-, or brave- or not feeling like working hard- it’s okay. And if there are moments where you- where you want to give up, that’s okay too. It doesn’t make you- it doesn’t make you any less than what you are. It just makes you human, and it’s okay you know- to be human. It’s okay if- if you hurt and it’s okay if you’re not okay. It’s- it’s okay.”
The two girls stare at each other, eyes shining with tears, as Paige let’s Azzi’s words wash over her. She’s been told a lot of platitudes about her injury, from her coaches to her teammates to her family. And she knows she has plenty of people in her corner, who root for her and who genuinely do believe she’ll have the greatest comeback ever. But the motivational speeches get draining after a while and all she’s wanted to do for the last couple of weeks is wallow. Then she felt guilty about wallowing, that little voice in her head yelling at her to be productive and work on getting back to herself because that’s what everybody expected. Paige hadn’t even realised how badly she needed someone to give her permission to not be okay, not until the only person who’d ever known that part of her, had finally said the words she so desperately needed to hear.
The thing is, when she was younger, Paige used to keep everything bottled inside. She’d always been hyper aware of her privilege and her problems had always just seemed so insignificant in front of her parents’ or her friends. So she’d kept them to herself, trapping herself in a web of her own burdens that sometimes threatened to strangle her. And then she’d met a girl at a USA basketball camp when she was 15, a girl who had gently flicked her fingers and Paige’s walls had fallen like dominoes. She hadn’t even known she was drowning, until Azzi had shown up with a lifeboat.
“I just-,” Azzi breaks Paige out of her trance by breaking the eye contact between them, “I didn’t know if anybody had said that to you yet and I just- I wanted you to hear it.”
In the span of a minute, a thousand and one phrases take birth in Paige’s mind and then die on the tip of her tongue. She opens and closes her mouth, trying to express even one of the myriad of emotions that are swirling like a tornado in her brain. But nothing comes out except a litany of incomprehensible noises. And Azzi seems to find the wrong answer in the silence, giving the blonde a timid nod. 
“Take care of yourself P,” her voice catches on the familiar nickname, as she shoots Paige a sad smile, before beginning to walk away. When Azzi chose UCLA, she’d lit Paige's heart on fire. So, Paige had drowned their friendship. And while all this time Azzi has struggled to breathe, Paige has burned but god, is she so fucking tired of it. 
“Fuck, Azzi wait,” Paige curses, hobbling to catch up to the brunette, who stops with a sigh but doesn’t make a move to return. Stubborn as always, Paige thinks, continuing her way over. When she does catch up, she’s not fully sure what to say and so,  “I uh- I’m out of milk.”
Azzi raises her eyebrows in question, crossing her arms protectively around her chest. 
“I can’t drive,” Paige explains slowly, “or walk obviously.”
Realisation dawns on Azzi’s face, “you’re asking me to drive you to the grocery store?”
“I guess,” Paige shrugs, trying to be nonchalant. 
“Seems like the kind of favour someone asks of their family, or their friends,” Azzi emphasises bitterly, never one to let go of an opportunity for sarcasm. 
Paige flinches, “right, I kinda deserved that one.”
She gets a raised eyebrow in response that very much says “ya think?”
“I’m trying here,” she says quietly, and Azzi’s hard demeanour softens, “I’m raising a white flag Az, calling a truce or whatever but it kinda needs to go both ways.” 
“What do you think me coming here was supposed to be?” the younger girl says exasperatedly, but she’s smiling again. It’s the third one Paige has gotten out of her today, and finally, she smiles back. They look a little foolish, standing in the apartment hallway, cheshire-cat-grinning at each other like idiots, but it feels like something has clicked into place again.  
“I’ll go grab my wallet, you go heat up the car.”
“It’s like 110 degrees dude.”
“Bro shut up, you know what I mean,” Paige huffs and when it makes Azzi laugh, she feels like she’s floating. It’s not as if she hasn’t been happy in a year because won’t you look at that, her world did keep turning after that one decision. But this is different. She feels airy and light, like she could jump off a cliff and fly instead of fall. 
“Well hurry up, I have things to do outside of just being your chauffeur.”
“Poor passenger princess, how the roles have reversed,” Paige mocks and it earns her an ever so familiar fond eye roll and for the first time in a year, she feels free. 
***
When she gets downstairs, Azzi’s leaning against her car door, a pair of sunglasses shielding her eyes. The hot California sun shines brightly against her tan skin, and Paige’s heart stutters because fuck, Azzi is golden. She looks every bit reminiscent of the girl Paige still has memorised and yet, every bit the promise of a girl Paige wants to learn by heart. 
“Nice car,” Paige smirks, alerting the younger girl of her presence.  
“It does the job,” Azzi says, looking up with a smile of her own, opening the passenger door for Paige to get in, “not all of us are raking in NIL deals to get the big guns, but we make do.”
“Steph Curry brand ambassador say what now?” the blonde girl teases as she slides into the car. When she looks up, Azzi’s frozen in place, “what?”
“Nothing I just-” she’s wearing sunglasses, but Paige knows Azzi's trying to avert her gaze, “I’m kinda surprised you know that.”
It’s Paige’s turn to look away, their newfound comfort giving away to that old awkwardness, “I keep up with most basketball news.”
To Azzi’s credit she doesn’t push. Instead, she makes her way into the driver seat without another sound. She’s about to connect her phone to the aux but Paige beats her to it. 
“Hey,” Azzi squeals, making grabby hands, “my car, my rules, my music.”
“Nuh-uh injury privileges,” Paige gloats, sticking out her tongue. 
“That’s not a thing.”
“Is too.”
“Fine, we’ll listen to your crap music.”
“I resent that,” Paige retorts, as Drake blasts through the speakers. The sound of it makes Azzi groan, and she dramatically bangs her head against the steering wheel. Paige spends the rest of the car ride singing at the top of her lungs. Azzi spends the rest of the car ride alternating between shaking her head and joining in with the singing. It’s like they’re back in 2020 all over again, back before they found themselves in the whirlwind of life, back when they were just Paige and Azzi.
*** 
Their trip inside the grocery store takes less time than the ride to get there, even if Paige takes her time dilly-dallying in the dairy section, pretending she’s going to get anything other than just regular milk. She’s overly conscious of the fact that their time together might be coming to an end, that this time she might actually have to deal with saying goodbye. But she’s not ready to go back to missing Azzi just yet. 
“Maybe you can show me your dorm,” she says quietly, once they're both back in the car, playing with the hem of her shirt. Beside her, Azzi draws in a sharp intake of breath, clearly not having expected Paige to want that of all things. In all honesty, the idea of stepping into the world that had stolen Azzi from her is not all that appealing to Paige but she wants to hold onto this moment just a little bit longer. 
“You wanna see my dorm?” 
“A chance to see how the non-blue blood peasants live? I’d never pass it up.”
“Non blue blood,” Azzi scoffs, "Ever heard of John Wooden?”
“I was talking about women’s basketball but yeah I have heard of him. I won the award last year. Over you,” Paige smirks, wiggling her eyebrows. 
“Not everyone’s a phenom their freshman year,” Azzi retorts fondly, unable to mask the hint of pride in her voice. 
“Well we’ll see this year-” Paige stops herself, cold seeping into her lungs, as she remembers why she’s in the stupid state of California in the first place. The lighthearted mood in the car goes tumbling out the window as her words hang like a dagger in the air. 
“Paige,” Azzi whispers, trying to wrap that one syllable in comfort. She reaches out to touch the blonde’s shoulder but must think better of it because her hand hovers mid-air for a second, before she pulls it back. Paige is suddenly hyper aware of the fact they haven’t touched yet. It’s a reminder of the fact that whatever progress they’ve made today, there’s still so much they haven’t even begun to unpack. 
“It’s fine,” Paige’s voice is steely, “just drive.”
Azzi opens and closes her mouth a couple of times, before simply nodding and starting the ignition. She’s clearly holding back and Paige doesn’t know how to feel about it. There’s a part of her that wants Azzi to push her to talk like she would before, but there's another part of her that knows this new rope they’re trying to string between them is fragile. 
They ride in silence to Azzi’s apartment, both of them too caught up in their own thoughts to bother with music this time. As the UCLA campus nears, Paige can’t help but hate it just a little bit. She’s aware she’s being petty. Acting like Storrs, Connecticut is some hub of beauty is probably a stretch of the imagination for anyone but she’s determined to dislike this place out of principle.
“Hmm not too shabby but like where’s the fucking cows?” Paige jokes, as the car comes to a stop in front of Azzi’s apartment building. She steps out gingerly, pretending to inspect her surroundings, making tsk-tsk noises at the most random things. 
“I’ve seen your apartment Bueckers, don’t even try,” Azzi retorts. 
It shouldn’t surprise Paige to see one of Azzi’s teammates when they enter her living room. It’s just like UConn really in the sense that there’s always someone there when you walk in but something about seeing Charisma Osborne just chilling in Azzi’s space suddenly makes it more real that the younger girl is definitely a UCLA Bruin. 
“Oh,” Charisma gives Paige a once-over, clearly not having expected to see her, “hi Paige.”
Paige waves, shuffling her weight on her crutches, unsure what to say. It’s not like she doesn’t know Charisma, they’ve literally won a gold medal together for USA basketball. She’s even met the girl a couple of times after and she likes her, she does. But her bitter brain is focused on the fact that this is one of those girls who had gotten Azzi as their teammate, one of the girls who got to see Azzi everyday. All things Paige had not gotten. 
“You didn’t tell me you were bringing company Az,” Charisma says pointedly, looking at Azzi and Paige bristles at the use of the nickname. She’s being all sorts of ridiculous but at least she’s self-aware of it. 
“Last minute decisions,” Azzi replies airily. The two girls lock eyes and Paige can tell they’re having some sort of unspoken conversation and now the green-eyed envy monster is out in full force. 
“I insisted on seeing her dorm,” she says finally, breaking into whatever staring competition the two UCLA guards are having. 
“It’s not a problem,” Charisma reassures, standing up from her position on the couch, and coming over to give Paige a tentative hug, “I just didn’t know you were coming. But it’s good to see you, Paige.”
“Yeah,” Paige tries to muster up a proper smile as she leans in to return the hug but it comes out more like a grimace, “you too.”
“We’re gonna go chill in my room,” Azzi says, beckoning to one of the doors in the hallways and Paige obediently follows her, waving a half-hearted goodbye to Charisma. She’s secretly pleased to have Azzi back to herself. 
The room is nothing out of the ordinary except it has Azzi all over it. She’s in the pink comforter that is thrown haphazardly over a clearly not made bed. She’s in the unicorn plushies laid delicately over a dark blue couch. She’s in the little flower stickers that outline the mirror on the far side of the room. There’s a wall dedicated solely to pictures and fairy lights on one side and Paige is immediately drawn to it. A familiar ache reverberates in her chest as her eyes flicker over the pictures of Azzi’s family. She’s missed them. Then there’s the photographs of Azzi in her UCLA uniform, her teammates surrounding her and Paige has to resist the dangerous urge to rip those off the wall. Be happy for her happiness, the logical part of her brain yells, not seeming to realise she’d left any chance of that in the dirt a year ago. As she tears her eyes away from those offending pictures, they land instead on a whole other set of photographs and she feels her heart catch in her throat. 
It’s a set of three images of her and Azzi, taken at various moments. Paige brushes her thumb against the one of the two of them with their arms around each other at the Minnesota  state fair. Azzi’s beaming at the camera and Paige is beaming at Azzi. They look so young, so naive, so happy. 
“I’m on your wall,” Paige breathes out, turning to face her best friend, “Fuck, I’m on you wall.”
“Of course you are,” Azzi affirms, like it’s the most obvious thing in the world but she shuffles nervously, giving away the reality behind her stable demeanour. 
“I never answered your texts. I didn’t call you back,” Paige lists quietly as the first tear falls from her eyes; she’s been holding them back all day, “and I’m on your fucking wall.”
Azzi looks away, unsure how to deal with the fact that apparently they’re no longer tip-toeing around the past. She doesn’t know how to tell the blonde that there had never really been a second thought about whether or not those photos were going up on the wall.
“Doesn’t matter,” she shrugs finally, “you’re my best friend. You’re always gonna be my best friend. Ride or die right?”
“Ride or die,” Paige repeats in a whisper before she all but throws herself at Azzi, practically moulding herself into the younger girl’s body. Caught off guard, Azzi stiffens for a second, before relaxing into it. It’s late outside and the sun has set, but in this moment, the world shines the brightest it has in a year as two stubborn girls finally find their way home to each other. 
***
That night, Azzi asks her tentatively if she wants to stay over and of course Paige agrees. Lying awake next to a familiar stranger, she lets herself finally remember the day things had first started unravelling.
November 2020
“You’ll probably get one of the upstairs apartments, so we probably won’t actually be living together which is good because can you imagine if I had to see your goofy ass 24/7?” Paige puts a dramatic hand to her forehead, as she leads Azzi into her room.
She’s too caught up in her excitement having Azzi at UConn, and planning what’ll happen next year, to notice that the girl in question isn’t participating at all in her enthusiasm. Paige has been waiting for what feels like a year (in reality it’s only been a few months) to finally have her best friend come visit. The minute the car had pulled up, she’d taken it upon herself to start her sales pitch all over again, missing the sympathetic smiles she’d gotten from the rest of the Fudd family as she pulled Azzi away to show her the glories of the campus. 
“Did you see my assist to Christyn today?” Paige gloats, falling onto her bed with a smirk. 
“It was pretty great,” Azzi concedes. 
“It was fucking perfect thank you very much. I set her up perfectly, exactly how she likes it.”
“Right.”
“And then did you see how excited the team was for her? For everyone? Never gonna find a greater group of girls.”
“They seem wonderful P.”
Paige furrows her eyebrows as she catches Azzi still lingering by the door instead of joining her on the bed. The brunette fidgets with the sleeve of her sweater, chewing on her lips.
“Are you allergic to my bed?” Paige waits for some smartass response. When she doesn’t get one, she frowns, instincts going haywire, “Az, you good?”
“I- '' Azzi looks away, swallowing nervously, “I need to tell you something and I- I’m not sure how you’re gonna react.” 
“You get a boyfriend or a girlfriend or something in the last few months that I don’t know about?” She says it light-heartedly enough, but the thought of it sends a sharp sting through Paige’s heart. In hindsight, she thinks maybe she could have dealt with it having been that. 
“What? No. Just- just don’t- dont take it personally okay. Like you can be upset about it but- but don’t hold it against me yeah? My parents- they said- they said you’d get it. You’d be upset but you’d- you’d get it because you- you get me right?”
Paige’s chest hammers as she watches the younger girl draw in a deep breath, “you’re scaring the shit out of me right now.”
“I’mcommittingtoUCLA” Azzi says all in one breath, the words blending together. 
She’s sure she’s heard it wrong. There’s no way. After all this time, after all their conversations, all the pitches, how hard she had worked, there was no way this was going to be the end to all of Paige’s efforts. 
“What?” she whispers, crossing her fingers that she has in fact misheard. 
When Azzi averts her eyes, she knows she hasn’t, “I’m committing to UCLA.”
The first time Paige and Azzi met was somewhat awkward, what with Azzi’s shyness and Paige being slightly overeager to make a new friend. When they’d become bus buddies, they’d progressed to being casual acquaintances who could small talk and share smiles. And then the flight back to Minnesota happened and everything had changed. Every moment after was filled with conversation or laughs or a comfortable silence. Until this one, where the sudden silence between them foreshadows an ominous future.
“Say something,” Azzi says finally, her voice shaking. 
Paige stares at her for a second before, “you named your dog Stewie.”
“What?”
“You named your dog Stewie. After Breanna Stewart who played at UConn. It’s not-” Paige wracks her brain, hands flying animatedly “it’s not Meyers or something, after someone who played at fucking UCLA. You named your dog after a UConn great. How are you going to take him to UCLA with you?”
Azzi stares at her, clearly not having expected that level of questioning of all things. Who could blame her when Paige herself feels a little insane. 
“This is a joke right? You’re fucking with me? Ha ha ha very funny,” she claps deliriously,  “hilarious prank seriously, like hats off you’ve outdone yourself but enough okay? Say sike right fucking now.”
Azzi makes a strangled noise, “it’s not a joke Paige. That’s- that’s my decision.”
“Then change it,” Paige yells, catapulting off the bed.
“Paige-”
“Have you told UCLA yet?”
“I wanted to tell my family and you first.”
“Oh wow, how kind of you. How fucking generous of you to do that Azzi,” Paige bites back sarcastically and Azzi flinches. 
In a flash, Paige’s expression goes from angry to desperate, “you still have time to change your mind . Please just- just think about it again okay? You still have so much time and you know what, stay here for a couple more days. Spend time with the team, with the coaches, with me and you’ll see-. UCLA just sounds nice you know? California, the sun, I get it, of course it’s tempting. But just- just stay here okay? And you’ll see this is where you belong,” she leaves the, with me, unsaid. 
“Paige,” Azzi’s voice cracks. She takes a step toward her and then pauses. It’s the first time in a long time that Azzi’s hesitated when it comes to Paige. It won’t be the last. And when she looks at Paige through her long eyelashes, tears threatening to fall from her dark brown eyes, Paige knows she’s lost. 
“No,” she’s pacing now, chest heaving up and down in a combination of frustration, anger and misery, “this is not fucking happening. We’re not doing this. I made you a whole recruitment video. Did you watch it? Do you know how long it took me to make it? Has the last year been a fucking joke to you?”
“Of course not-”
“Don’t even. Because clearly- clearly it has. Must’ve been hilarious watching me beg and plead with you when you already fucking knew you were going to committ somewhere else.”
“That’s not fair,”  Azzi’s voice rises at the accusation, “I had no idea where I was going until a couple of weeks ago. You can’t seriously think that low of me.”
“Not fair? You know what’s not fair, Azzi? We’ve been talking about playing together, about finally being on the same team, the same fucking state, for years. What’s not fair is you throwing all of that away on a whim.”
“I’m not committing to UCLA on a whim. This is my whole future we’re talking about. You don’t even know how much thought I’ve put into it. And I’m choosing what’s best for me. You can’t hold that against me Paige. You can’t.”
They stand on opposite sides of the room, taking in harsh staggered breaths and glaring at each other. The tension in the room is electric as the string connecting them frays. Paige and Azzi bicker, they don’t argue. Or at least, that’s how it used to be. 
“Az?” their stare down is broken by a knock on the door as Katie Fudd lets herself in. Immediately, as she stares between her daughter and the girl who’d become just as important, Katie knows what has happened, “we’re going back to the air BnB, are you staying here?”
The answer should be obvious, like it used to be. Of course she would stay here. It was meant to be a no-brainer. But before Azzi can say that, Paige intervenes and the string snaps. 
“She’s going with you,” the blonde says firmly, before turning her back. She won’t let Azzi see the tears, she won’t. For her part, the brunette stares at Paige’s back silently for a couple of seconds, before a mask of determination slips on. 
“Fine. If that’s what you fucking want,” Azzi sneers before brushing past her mom, eager to get away and hide her own tears. 
When Paige turns back around, Katie is already looking at her. The older woman walks the length of the room and pulls the younger girl into a hug that she readily melts into. Paige sniffles as Azzi’s mom soothingly rubs her back. 
“We’re driving back tomorrow morning,” Katie whispers quietly into Paige’s hair, “I know you’re mad sweetheart but come say goodbye okay?”
And she does. She shows up with only half an hour or so remaining before Azzi leaves, but Paige shows up. They hug stiffly, exchanging maybe a sentence or two but in that moment it’s enough. They’ll call later when Azzi gets home and it’ll be awkward for a little bit but they’ll break through. They’ll figure out a way to go on without having to talk about the “big thing”. They’ll hold on as long as they can, until they can’t anymore. 
***
September 2022
After the night Paige stays over at Azzi’s apartment, they're attached at the hip for the next few weeks, just like old times. They’ve fallen into a routine of sorts. Azzi shows up without fail every day after practice to pick Paige up from her rehab, and then the rest of the younger girl’s time is Paige’s. The first time she’d seen the brunette leaning casually against her car, Paige had had to stop herself from jumping into her arms. She’d played it as nonchalant as possible, joking about Azzi being stalker, but inside, she could feel it again, the dangerously familiar tap of this is all I’ll ever need. 
On days Paige doesn’t have rehab, Azzi still shows up right on time on her doorstep with a board game or food or something.  It’s gotten to the point where every time the doorbell rings, Paige opens it expecting Azzi. The couple times it’s not, she tries and fails to hide the disappointment on her face. It earns her an eye roll from the delivery guy but it’s worth it for the laugh it elicits from Azzi when she tells her the story. They fall back together as if they’d never fallen apart. And what’s more terrifying than finding out that she’d never truly gotten over old Azzi, is realising how easy it would be to fall in love with new Azzi. 
When Caroline, Nika and Piath come to visit the weekend after, all three of them can immediately tell that something's changed. Their teammate seems lighter, as if she’s finally found a sense of calm. But their incessant prodding and raised eyebrows are only met with shrugs from a tight-lipped Paige. It isn’t until Azzi calls, and Nika snatches the phone out of Paige’s hands, gasping at the callerID, that they finally figure out why their point guard has a new kick in her step. 
“You should invite her out with us tonight,” Caroline is the first to speak, giving Paige an encouraging smile. 
“Carol,” Nika hisses, “we can’t just invite the enemy.”
“She’s not the enemy,” Paige defends immediately, “we don’t even have a rivalry with UCLA.”
Nika scoffs indignantly, “of course she is. She picked a different school over us. Over UConn! That’s weird. Who even does that?”
“Lots of people do,” Caroline, who occasionally texts Azzi (albeit she’s kept that somewhat of a secret), supplies helpfully, shrugging when the Croatian glares at her. 
Piath nudges Paige when she notices the other girl has gone quiet, “ignore Nika. She doesn’t mean it, you know that. If you wanna invite her, invite her.” 
And she does, she wants to so badly. It’s insane really because it hasn’t even been a full day since they’d last seen each other but Paige swears something inside her has been missing since. There’s something awfully terrifying about letting Azzi back into the UConn version of her world, the world that the younger girl had once rejected. Still, if they’re going to try this again, she supposes sooner or later, it’ll have to happen. 
“Put her on speaker,” Nika orders when Paige grabs her phone back from her. 
“Nika,” Caroline, younger only by age, warns, pulling the other girl away, “we’re supposed to be cheering her up, not making life harder.”
Azzi answers on the third ring, her voice teasing  “miss me already?”
Yes, Paige thinks, sometimes I think I miss you even when you’re right here next to me, sometimes I think I’ll miss you forever. But she doesn’t say any of that. 
“Not a chance,” she scoffs instead, “besides you called me first.”
“Butt dial.”
“Mmmhmm I’m sure.”
“Shut up,” Azzi laughs and Paige is glad her teammates aren’t here to see the goofy grin that appears on her face at the sound of it, “I just wanted to see if we were doing something tonight?”
“Yeah- umm- you remember I told you about the girls coming down this weekend. They- uh- they wanted to go out tonight and uh- you could come along?” 
There’s a pause on the other end and Paige knows Azzi’s going through the same thought process as her. 
“I don’t wanna intrude on your time with your team P-”
“You wouldn’t be intruding,” Paige cuts in immediately and although she figured her teammates were definitely eavesdropping, Nika cursing about her being “pussywhipped” followed by in-sync shushing from Piath and Caroline, gives them away. 
On the other end of the line, Azzi’s quiet again, “it’s okay P, you go have fun with your friends. We don’t have to spend every night together. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
What she doesn’t say is that maybe they need to learn how to live like that again, how to live apart again. Paige is almost done with the LA part of her rehab, something both of them are still in denial about. It’s only a matter of time before they return back to their two separate worlds and neither of them are sure they’ve managed to repair their friendship enough to not slip back into their foolishness again. 
“But I wanna see you tonight,” Paige whines, her tone teetering on the edge of sounding like a desperate girlfriend, “please.”
“Paige-”
“Pleaseeeeeee. I’m literally injured and begging Az, it’d be mean to say no.”
“What does your injury even have to do with any of this?” Azzi sighs exasperatedly, “but yeah okay fine calm down Bueckers. Send me an address, I’ll be there.”
“You don’t wanna come pregame here?” 
“Dude, let's not push it, okay?”
“Yeah, yeah okay see you,” Paige pauses, “hey Az?”
“Hmm?”
“I’m really happy you’re coming tonight.”
“I’m really happy you’re happy P.”
***
Azzi Fudd is a menace. See, people often get fooled by her soft-spoken nature and shy demeanour, but Paige has been around her long enough to know the truth. In the beginning it was the witty quips the younger girl always had ready whenever they were having some ridiculous argument. After that, it was the direct pranks that wreaked havoc on Paige’s life. But tonight, in Paige’s opinion, tonight is Azzi’s worst offence. She had to have done it on purpose, had to have known the sheer effect it would have on Paige to see her dressed like that. The red criss-cross tank top fits her like a mould and the way her ripped jeans shorts cling to her hips leaves little to the imagination. Her diamond belly button piercing shines against her skin, taunting Paige. She wants to touch, she wants to feel, she wants to do all the unspeakable things in her mind but she’s forced to just watch. 
What she hates most though, is that everybody else is watching too. Since Azzi’s walked into the club, Paige has had to fight the urge to strangle every stranger who had given her best friend an appraising once-over. Some of them let their eyes linger long enough to give her time to plot out the perfect murder strategy (it’s the only way she can stop herself from actually committing a crime tonight). And, as Azzi dances with Caroline, hips swaying to the beat and holding the other girl a little closely, Paige has the irrational urge to hit sweet, kind Caroline of all people. 
The thing is, Azzi’s been a little too attached to Caroline since she got here in Paige’s opinion. And she gets it. Piath, bless her soul, is trying but has always been a little awkward around new people. Nika is definitely not trying, loyally holding onto a grudge on behalf of Paige. Which leaves Caroline, who’s already familiar territory and the younger girl has grasped onto her like a lifeline. But enough is enough Paige decides, as she slips out of her seat with a determined look. Smoothly, she cuts right in between Caroline and Azzi.
“Nika’s a little wasted and I don’t want to deal with,” it’s a blatant lie but Paige knows appealing to Caroline’s more motherly instincts will get her what she wants. She gets a raised eyebrow in return, her teammate clearly catching her ruse because Nika looks visibly fine. But it works anyway and Paige gets Azzi to herself. She reaches for the other girl’s hand, twirling her just so she can hear that stupid silly laugh, and then pulling her back so she’s facing Paige. 
“You having fun?” 
“Always have fun with you P,” Azzi replies. She’s clearly tipsy but there’s no hint of insincerity in her voice. It makes Paige’s breath hitch. 
“Yeah?” she whispers, taking a step closer, “more than with Carol?”
Azzi giggles, “more than anyone.”
The song in the club changes and as the crowd adjusts to it, someone jostles Azzi and immediately Paige grabs at her hips to steady her. As she finds her balance, Azzi’s giggles subside, realising just how close she is to the blonde now. They’re stuck in slow motion as the world dances around them. The combination of adrenaline and alcohol pumping through her veins is what convinces Paige to test the limits. One hand still squeezing at Azzi’s bare waist, revelling in finally getting to touch, she brings up her thumb to trace around Azzi’s lips. The younger girl gulps, but when she doesn’t try to move away, confidence pulses through Paige. Her heart is beating frantically out of her chest, years and years of want and need that she’d shoved as far away as possible, desperately fighting to get to the surface. 
Pushing herself closer, so their chests are now pressed to each other and Azzi’s hands have no choice but to latch onto her biceps, Paige places a delicate, teasing kiss to the corner of Azzi’s lips. She wishes she could record the whine it elicits and listen to it on loop for hours. Smirking, she moves to place another one on the other side, this time pressing her lips a little harder, a little longer. Azzi’s eyes are closed shut, hands gripping onto Paige so tightly, she knows there’ll be a mark on her biceps tomorrow. She cups Azzi’s face with both hands now, her own eyes shutting involuntarily, as she finally, finally brushes their lips together. 
This time, the strangled noise that leaves Azzi’s throat, is one Paige wishes she could forget as the younger girl rips herself away from Paige, the force of it creating almost a foot of distance between them. It doesn’t take long for the familiar sting of rejection to make itself home in her heart. Azzi’s eyes are brimming with tears as she manically shakes her head. Without a word, she rushes through the crowd, making a beeline for the exit, leaving Paige confused and craving for another taste. 
***
It takes Paige a second to gather her thoughts before following the brunette. She ignores the confused glances from her teammates, making some bullshit excuse about fresh air as she fights her way outside. When she gets there, Azzi’s leaning against the wall, eyes closed as she takes in long deep breaths. 
“That’s not usually how girls react when I try to kiss them,” Paige says after a second, trying to make light of the situation, even if her heart is heavy with anxiety. 
It’s the wrong thing to say because Azzi scoffs, “you kiss a lot of girls don’t you.”
“Yeah and most of them kiss me back,” Paige bites back. 
She’s taken aback by the fire in the darker-skinned girl’s eyes as Azzi finally opens them, heaving herself off the wall. 
“I won’t be one of your groupies Paige. I won’t be one of your desperate one night stands. I won’t be just some other hookup. I won’t!”
Frankly she’s a little offended Azzi would even think that of her. She’s aware of her reputation. In fact she’d probably fed into it a little bit, exaggerating her escapades to Azzi on the phone her freshman year, when they had been on the verge of combusing and she’d been desperate to get a rise out of the younger girl. Last year though, last year was different. But Azzi doesn’t know that. 
“I don’t want you to be any of that,” she replies feebly. 
“Then what, do you want me to be?” Azzi’s voice rises with each syllable. 
Paige stutters, the words getting stuck in her throat. The truth is she wants Azzi to be everything. The truth is, Azzi already is everything. Except there’s too much between them and she just can’t say it. They stand in silence until Azzi finally breaks it.
“I think these last few weeks of summer might have been the best of my life,” she says miserably, “and that might be the worst thing ever you know? Because it’s not real. You’re gonna go back to your world and you’ll- you’ll stop replying to my texts and you’ll stop- you’ll stop calling me and I- I don’t know if I can do that again.”
“That’s an awful lot of assumptions you’re making about me,” Paige is on defensive mode now, feeling a fight brewing. 
“Because that’s what happened. Go back through your fucking phone Paige. Look at all the times I tried. And all the times you never did. You just- you cut me out Paige.”
“That’s not fair. You chose fucking UCLA. Over me.”
“No,” Azzi corrects immediately, anger seeping into her tone, “I chose UCLA over UConn. You made it about yourself.”
Paige swallows back a bitter response in favour of trying to prevent a full-fledged argument, “okay, okay let’s not- let’s not do this okay. It’ll be better this time- I- I won’t ignore your calls or texts or you okay? Just- can we just go back inside please?”
“That’s the thing,” Azzi’s anger is gone, replaced by a sad wistful smile, “I don’t know if I believe that you will,” a single tear rolls down her cheek, “I- I don’t fully trust you and you haven’t fully forgiven me. So where do we go from here?”
It’s a lie what they say about the truth setting you free, Paige thinks as Azzi’s words squeeze at her heart, because all it’s done is unleash shackles of despair that holds them both hostage. It had been easy the last couple of weeks, to pretend the last year had never happened. It had been easy for Paige to pretend that she was over what happened, to ignore the part of her brain that still felt so utterly betrayed. 
“Azzi, what are you saying? You don’t- you don’t wanna be friends?” Paige feels nauseous even saying it. 
“No I-” Azzi chews at her bottom lip, “I’m saying this- us- we’re too fragile to complicate even more. I barely- fuck- Paige, I barely survived losing my best friend. I don’t think I could survive losing something more.” 
The worst thing about it all, is that it makes sense. And really, Paige doesn’t know what she’d expected to happen if Azzi hadn’t pulled away when she did. They’d kiss, maybe give in and do more and then what? Shake hands and walk away? Or make false promises that would ultimately lead to resentment? No, Years and years of something deserved better than either of those masochistic endings. It makes sense, it does but it doesn’t mean Paige has to like it. 
In front of her, all the fight evaporates from Azzi’s body, as the younger girl leans back against the brick wall of the club, sliding down and pulling her knees to her chest. She looks every bit as miserable as Paige feels and all the blonde wants to do is wipe away the stress lines creasing against the younger girl’s beautiful phase. She moves to sit down next to her best friend, shuffling so their shoulders are pressed together and intertwines their fingers together. A sigh of relief escapes her when Azzi doesn’t immediately pull away. Instead, she squeezes their hands tighter, as if she’s scared that if she lets go, Paige will disappear. 
“You didn’t lose me you know,” Paige says softly after a second, nudging Azzi’s shoulder when the other girl lets out a noise of protest, “I know, I know it feels like you did. It felt like that to me too except- every time something good or bad happened to me, I heard your voice or- or maybe I just really wanted too. We got lost a little bit but I didn’t- I didn’t lose you and you didn’t lose me. There’s a difference. I don’t think we could ever lose each other like that. Not really.”
When Azzi turns to look at her, the golden glow of the street lights illuminate the emotions in her eyes. She gives Paige a soft smile, “well Bueckers, if basketball doesn’t work out, maybe you have a future in poetry.”
“I could do whatever I wanted,” except what I want to do the most. 
It doesn’t take long for the Uber Azzi’s already called to start pulling up and that familiar ache of longing creeps into Paige’s spine. She knows tonight isn’t their final goodbye; they still have a couple more days. But those days will be spent ignoring and pretending, unlike tonight and the firm grip they have on reality. They rise off of the cold pavement together, dusting themselves off. It takes a second of awkward glances before they’re surging into each other’s arms, squeezing each other so tightly that it’s hard to breathe. Paige wills herself not to cry, hiding her face in the crook of Azzi’s neck. 
“We’ll be okay,” she whispers, unsure if it’s more for her benefit or Azzi’s. 
The unwanted beep of a car is the only reason they reluctantly pull away, hurriedly wiping away unshed tears, they pretend the other can’t see. Azzi musters up a brave smile, before slowly moving away and it takes everything in Paige not to crumble and begs her to stay. Azzi’s halfway to the car when she turns back and it feels like Paige can breathe again. The brunette’s face is conflicted for a second before turning determined, as she starts walking back up. 
“Az-”
Paige’s confusion is stifled as Azzi fists her shirt, pulling her into a searing kiss. It’s desperate and needy and it’s only a few seconds before the dark-haired girl is pulling away again, but it sets Paige’s entire world off balance. 
“I just-” Azzi’s breathing is rapid and uneven, “I’ve wanted to do that since I was fifteen and- just- fuck- I just-,” she blinks up at Paige, “I hate- I hate leaving things unfinished and for fucks sake if you don’t call me back this time Bueckers- just- don’t be a stranger.”
Paige doesn’t get time to answer, she doesn’t think she could even if she did, because Azzi scurries away almost immediately. She stops when she gets to the car, turning back to give Paige one final look, a look that will haunt Paige forever, before getting into the backseat. As Paige watches the back of Azzi’s uber gets smaller and smaller, her tongue darts across her lips as she tries to memorise the faintest taste of Azzi’s strawberry-flavoured lipstick. And she knows, she’s so utterly and completely and terribly fucked.
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nina-ya · 5 months
Note
HII!!1!1!1 i hope ur doing well
im currently sick (GRAHH) my throat has been hurting
ANYWAYSSS since i havent been able to sleep (its like umm 4:23 am) i had this little ermmm ideaaa :3
law x reader but the reader is shy n she doesnt know how to say “no” to people so law has to step in whenever too many people start asking her for help n shit
AAAAA idk bye bye have a great day/night pookie bearrrr
Law When You Don't Know How To Say 'No'
A/N: HI!! I am sorry that this took me so long but here it issss This was honestly a bit too easy to write since im lowkey (highkey) the same way,,, ANYWAYS i hope you enjoy!!! Pairing: Law x reader CW: Cursing WC: 1.4k
Law noticed your tendency to always say yes to everything from the moment he first met you. When you guys would be wandering islands, you bought every item from merchants who tried to haggle with you. When citizens asked for your help, even if their intentions were obviously terrible, you couldn't resist saying yes. You even put up with friends whom you knew were less than ideal for months, all because you never had the courage to step away. You always said “yes” to people, and frankly, Law was getting tired of it.
The lectures from him never seemed to end. Almost nightly, you heard the broody captain telling you to ‘stand up for yourself’ and how ‘you can’t keep saying yes to everyone.’ Yet, despite Law's advice, you couldn't help but continue your habitual affirmation. The pattern had become ingrained in your nature, and breaking free from it proved more challenging than you anticipated.
You found yourself caught in an interesting situation this time around. The Heart Pirates had chosen to dine at a tavern on an island where they were docked. At first glance, it seemed like the perfect haven for pirates, since it's main clientele were pirates themselves. However, the moment you all walked in and witnessed the chaos, it became clear that your assumptions were very wrong. If it weren’t for the fact that this tavern was the only food establishment that accepted pirates, you all would have walked right out. Instead, you kept to yourselves by Law's orders and settled into a corner booth to eat.
The drinks arrived first, followed closely by the food. Everyone dug in rather quickly. You happened to be the first to finish your drink, and the desire for a refill tugged at you. However, as you observed the chaos around the tavern, you noticed the waitress busy preventing another group of pirates from shooting each others heads off. Deciding not to add to her workload, you opted to head to the bar and refill your drink on your own.
Approaching the bar, you leaned onto it with your empty cup in hand, waiting for the equally busy bartender to notice you. Lost in thought, you heard the scrape of a barstool next to you, and your attention was drawn to a larger man taking a seat.
"What are you having?" The man asked, his deep voice resonating as he leaned closer to you.
"Oh, it's nothing," you replied with a nervous laugh, hopeful that the bartender would soon notice your empty cup.
"Well, why don’t you let me get you another one of those?" he offered, leaning in once more. You subtly leaned away, feeling his presence a bit too close for comfort. Undeterred, he continued, "You know, we can always use someone like you on my crew. We would treat you well, and who knows, maybe you’ll have a different kind of fun with us," he suggested.
A wave of revulsion washed over you at his lewd proposition, prompting you to redirect your focus to the bar before you. Your words stumbled in an attempt to deny his request, "Oh, um, well, that’s a nice offer, but…" Yet, the refusal lingered unspoken, lost in the unease of the moment.
His smirk deepened, the subtle twist of his lips revealing a hint of satisfaction as he responded, "It is a nice offer indeed. So what do you say? We set sail tonight, and my crew would love to have someone like you around." He gestured toward his crew behind him, and your gaze involuntarily drifted to them. Some appraised you with lingering looks, while others seemed to undress you with their eyes, treating you as if you were nothing more than a piece of meat on display.
Back where Law was, he noticed that you had been gone for a while. His sharp eyes scanned the room, and a sense of concern flickered across his face when they landed on you at the bar, engaged in conversation with a larger pirate. "Shit," he muttered to himself, a distinct tension tightening his jaw. Excusing himself from the table, he swiftly made his way over to you. As he approached, he couldn't help but overhear snippets of the conversation.
“Come on, join me on the sea. I’m sure you’ll have a great time,” the larger man urged, attempting to coax you into considering his offer.
“I, uh…” You started, your words faltering, leaving you struggling to defend yourself in the face of his persistence.
Unable to tolerate the uncomfortable scene any longer, Law stepped up behind you. A firm hand landed on your shoulder, pulling you closer to him, and he spoke up, his voice cutting through the awkward atmosphere, "Hey, fuck off, they're with me."
You jumped slightly at the unexpected touch, but the tension in your shoulders immediately eased as you recognized Law's presence. A sigh of relief escaped you as the larger man grew visibly upset and angered by Law's bold interruption. "And who are you supposed to be?" the man demanded, his crew getting riled up in response to their captain being openly defied. The whole tavern seemed to be swallowed by a growing tension, the air thick with the anticipation of a confrontation.
“Room,” Law uttered, and a blue bubble enveloped the tavern. The charging pirates were frozen in their tracks as Law unsheathed Kikoku in a blur of motion. With a quick and precise slash through the air, the pirate and his crew were cut right in half. Their halves pathetically fell to the floor, leaving the once chaotic tavern in a stunned silence.
The Heart Pirates were the first to break the quiet, erupting into cheers and applause for their captain. Law smirked at the defeated pirates sprawled before him, a victorious glint in his eyes. Without missing a beat, he grabbed your arm, gently pulling you away from the bar and toward the exit of the tavern.
“Come on, let's get out of here,” he said, leading the way back towards the Polar Tang, the rest of the crew in tow. The tense atmosphere dissipated with each step, replaced by the comforting sounds of the cheering Heart Pirates, celebrating their captain's quick and decisive action.
You both made it back to the submarine, and Law dragged you into his quarters, lightly slamming the door behind him. He released your arm but kept his gaze fixed on you, a hint of irritation evident in his eyes. "Care to explain what happened back there?"
You tried to defend yourself, stammering, "I tried to tell him that I won’t join him, but I—"
"Tried? I didn’t see much trying, only a failure to say no like you always do," he cut you off abruptly, his tone stern. "You're going to get yourself killed one day, I swear," he added with a deep sigh.
You looked down in embarrassment, your voice lowering as you responded, "...I know. I’m sorry." The weight of his concern sank in, and you couldn't help but feel a mixture of regret and gratitude for his protective demeanor.
"Saying sorry doesn’t mean anything if you don’t do anything to fix it," he responded harshly. The weight of his words pressed upon you, and he noticed your embarrassment. Sighing, he seemed to calm himself. Walking over, he placed both hands on your shoulders. When you looked up at him, his tone softened, "Look, I’m just worried for you. I don’t want to see you wind up on some other asshole’s ship all because you can't say no. Do you get that?"
You nodded, and he offered a small smile. "Good. Now, I need you to promise me that you will grow a spine and start saying no. You can even start with me if it will help you. Okay?" he suggested, his concern evident in his gaze.
You looked into his steely grey eyes, filled with genuine worry for you, and offered your pinky to him. “I can promise to try?” you offered with a sheepish smile, hoping he would accept.
He looked at your pinky and rolled his eyes slightly, but took one of his hands off your shoulder, interlocking his pinky with your own. “I’ll take what I can get,” he responded. “Now, let’s talk about how you almost just ran off with that creep and his crew,” he teased you, a smirk growing on his face.
“Hey! I didn’t mean to almost run off with them,” you retorted sheepishly.
“Ahuh, okay. Now run that whole conversation from the top to me,” he responded, practically taunting you. You rolled your eyes at him as you began to replay the interaction, reliving your embarrassment in the retelling for him, internally telling yourself that you would grow a spine so that you would never have to be teased like this again.
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moonrisecoeur · 5 months
Note
IM BACK CUZ IM MENTALLY UNWELL OK. and yes you’re the best sub Leon writer 😏🥱 and yes I liked it, SITTING ON HIS FACE? 😍🥱
I’m so sorry for blasting ur req box but YOURE AN ACTUALLY GOOD SUB LEON WRITER SO can you blame me? concept: idk why but re4 Leon is so free use coded and so imagine he is on a mission with a new assigned partner but she’s an asshole to him (“fuck off man, I can do it myself, “I don’t need your help”, “you’re too nice and gonna be taken advantage of 😐”, etc. You get the gist) and his goofy ass just tryna be nice and helpful, cuz this is leon we are talking about. But the fun part ⁉️ they have cameras installed in the hideout they are saying at for security purposes. But ofc, Leon always tries to check on reader to make sure she’s ok - even if she’s an asshole to him. AND YK WHAT READER DOES 😭 she’s way too horny and just goes at it, girl got a masturbation problem on god. Every night. One night - wrong time and place - Leon opens his laptop to see the cameras making sure she’s ok AND HELP HE SEES HER … yk. And he feels guilty like he shouldn’t watch but he does anyways. And this goes on for weeks. Until one night he’s sick and tired of her always being so mean and he accidentally lets it slip that he’s been watching her LOL AND SHES LIKE UHM BOY WHAT 🙄⁉️ and he tries to play it off like “I didnt mean to” but like, my brother in Christ… you’ve been watching every night for weeks 🤨 wdym you didn’t mean to? ANYWAYS LONG STORY SHORT SHE PUNISHES HIM AND HEAVYYYY ON THE FREE USE THING. Love you bae 😘
i made a couple minor changes just for convenience :) fem reader she/her pronouns!
also i didn’t write the smex scene IM SORRY but i have been working on this all day and i need to get to other asks but i promise i’ll write some more free use in the future because it’s so smexy
-
"look, i know you don't like me-"
"oh? really? tell me what you think you know, kennedy," you scowl at him, and though it spooks him just a little, he tries to seem unphased.
he frowns, not hurt by your words but definitely concerned that you'll make a bad partner, "you don't need to be this hostile. we're allies. we're supposed to have each other's backs."
"right..." your voice echos, and leon knows that if it came down to it, you wouldn't protect him, wouldn't save him, would barely help him. he's practically on his own for this mission, just has an extra body with him to shoot at the bad guys.
it hurts, to some degree, because even without knowing you well, and even with you being cold and rude to him, he knows he'd come to your rescue in a heartbeat. something about him feels fond of you, even though in your entire time knowing leon kennedy, you haven't said one nice thing to him.
he thinks that maybe he likes that you've never been nice to him. he doesn't really know what to do with that thought.
-
leon is proved wrong.
despite the harshness of your words, you come to his rescue, fighting off the villager who almost decapitated him with an axe like both of your lives depend on it (because they do).
he watches you fight nervously, but when you come out on top, aside from the gash wound you take to the hip, he feels his heart skip a beat.
"this is what happens when you hurt my partner," you groan, holding your side, trying to speak through the pain even though leon can see the blood seeping between your fingers.
you whisper something in your victim's ear, something leon can't quite make out, before you kill him. leon wonders what it was briefly. he decides it doesn’t matter.
you both breathe a sigh of relief, but it's short lived as you collapse to the ground. you saved him. you got hurt saving him.
"here, let me help you," he mutters, coming over to you, not even stopping to ask if you want his help because he knows you'll say no, "stop fighting me. you're hurt and i need to patch you up."
the pain is agonizing, but even through gritted teeth and tense breaths, you push through it. he has to commend you a little bit, you're tougher than you look.
but when you try to push his hand away, claiming "i'm fine, kennedy," he sees the struggle in your face, hears the hurt in your voice. his heart seems to stop. he's worried, "i can do it myself, you don't have to- fuck, dude, i don't need your help-."
"-just relax, okay? i got you..”
you don't have the strength to push him away, but you know you shouldn't anyway, so you just slouch back against the wall and try to breathe, "fine, just fuckin... hurry up."
"i'm just trying to take care of you. we're partners, right? i gotta look out for you," he smiles, trying to lighten the mood even slightly. he wishes that this would be the time the barriers come down, that those skyscraper walls that prevented him from coming any closer to you emotionally could come crashing down, if only for a moment.
"you don't have to do anything. you're choosing to put yourself in danger to help me," you groan as you lean back, looking up at the ceiling, "suprised that no one's tried to take advantage of your willingness to help before."
"someone did," he mutters annoyedly, focusing more on the wound then it being your wound, on your body. his eyebrows, almost naturally furrowed from years of stress, somehow make his face even more sad to gaze upon. it's not that he's unattractive, far from it, but he's... worn. tired. a piece of your heart, no matter how far you keep away from him, aches in sympathy.
-
leon carries you back to the safe room, a hideout you both are using to rest and recover in while you plot your next move. he lays his jacket on the ground to at least give you something comfortable to lie on. you don't look comfortable, but he can't do anything else to help you.
he looks through his things, trying to concoct something that will at least make you feel a little bit better. he finds a first aid spray, and his heart jumps out of his chest in excitement. he uses it to take care of your wound, and waits for you to wake up from your unconscious state.
he decides to go back out, hoping to maybe find some other things to help you both on your mission. he knows you'll berate him for leaving on his own, risking his own life needlessly. but god if he didn't imagine what it would be like if he found something you could really use, and watch your eyes light up. even if you didn't like him, you'd be happy. he wants to see you smile, to praise him for a job well done.
he cringes at how pathetic it sounds, but he sets off either way, leaving you wrapped in his jacket with a note from him saying what he's doing.
-
he doesn't do it intentionally. at least... not the first time. genuinely, he just wanted to check up on you, make sure you were alive and breathing and safe. and you definitely were.
he doesn't know why its so hypnotizing, why he can't put his goddamn phone away with the stupid security app on it. of course it's you, though. you're hypnotizing.
he watches every pixel, every distorted view of you touching yourself in the safe room, obviously unaware that he could... see this. he's glad there's no audio, or else he'd be unable to control himself, even in an abandoned building surrounded by zombies. maybe its the years that haven hardened him, burned the fear out of his soul and numbed him to the presence of those things, but he doesn't feel anything but uncontrollable desire right now.
have you been doing it the whole time? you both had spilt off from each other multiple times, and he would almost be upset at the idea that every time he was fighting for his life and barely, barely winning that fight each time, you were getting off a couple hundred feet from him in another room... if it wasn't so fucking hot to watch you masturbate.
he keeps watching until he notices that you're having an orgasm, body twitching and your chest heaving up and down as you take deep breathes. it's so fucking sexy, leon probably could have cum on the spot if he watched anymore.
-
you keep doing it. he keeps watching it. over the course of the mission (of course he had to be stuck on a long, secluded recon mission with you of all people) he's watched you too many times. he doesn't think he has enough fingers to count how many times, which either means he's been on this mission longer than he thought or you have a fucking addiction. he's almost kind of impressed at how efficient you are. takes you 10 minutes tops, and then you just get back up and keep on trucking? his sentimental, post-nut ass could never.
and, though you recovered from your wound, you haven't displayed any sense of gratitude for leon taking care of you when you passed out after getting hurt. not that he expects it, truthfully. you saved his life, he saved yours. you were even.
he just doesn't feel like he's broken any new ground. he feels like, if anything, you feel even further away, emotionally. he's about had it.
"hey, we need to talk," he says, ominously; he doesn't intend it to be so, "i understand you don't like me. it's fine. i don't even care anymore. but i am tired of you talking to me like i'm a pushover."
you look over at him, reloading your gun with a displeased look on your face. leon hates the inner urge he has to cave and apologize to you, as if his body would rather give up any sense of dignity he still has in favor of being slightly more tolerable to you.
"well? are you going to say something?"
you scoff, looking away, "didn't know you were so fucking sensitive, kennedy," and you turn around, ready to walk out, before he snaps, "this isn't a pleasure trip. sorry you're not having a good time."
"clearly you're having a good time with all the pleasure you're giving yourself while i'm trying not to die."
he stops. panicking. trying to think of how to spin the words he just said and make it not sound like he knew every tell you had when you were about to cum or exactly how you touch yourself in order to get yourself off quickly.
you stop as well. and you look back at him with this expression on your face that is completely unreadable.
maybe it wasn't the best move to reveal the only card he had left to play if it mean he would get this reaction out of you considering that, again, you so clearly do not like him.
... right?
"what... did you say, kennedy?" you ask, pure venom in your voice. it's not a question, you so clearly heard him correctly.
"i- i'm sorry, i didn't mean to say that-"
"have you been watching me?" you take a step closer, eyes boring into his soul so intensely he can't make eye contact. he has no way out of this situation. he feels out of breath, nervous, god why are you getting so close to him? "answer me, leon," not kennedy, leon, "have you been watching me masturbate?"
he looks up, trying to keep himself from making eye contact. he knows the second he looks into your eyes, he will be putty in your hands, free for you to mold into whatever you'd like. he knows you're not looking at him with distain like usual, it's something else.
something hungry.
"yeah," he breathes, barely getting the world out at all. you take a deep breath, as if you're debating what you're going to do.
"what you did was wrong, you see that, right?"
"yes, i know, but-"
you scoff, annoyed. god why in this moment, just inches away from you, you notice the moles on his neck, the angle of his jaw, the entrancing aura of his eyes. it's so damn distracting, and you have to pull yourself together, "but nothing. you watched me without my consent, you got off on it, didn't you?"
"god, you're making it sound so bad, i... i'm sorry, okay? how can i make it up to you?" he asks, trying so damn hard as always to please.
this is where you come to realize that maybe you didn't hate leon kennedy all this time. maybe you found yourself too comfortable, too at ease in his presence. maybe he was safe and sweet and gentle and it didn't sit right because nothing in a world with zombies and bioweapons and cults and parasites was gentle. but leon is.
you look down, considering your options, "i have an idea. you're free to refuse and we go back to before, and you get nothing from me. do you want to hear it?"
"sure?"
you take a breath, going for it, "i’ll be… blunt. if you couldn’t tell, i’m a bit.. insatiable. i need something to get myself off now that i’m getting bored of my own hands out here. you help me, and i’ll forgive you for watching me.”
his thoughts stop. he genuinely can’t put together a coherent thought, what did you mean? "are you.. are you fucking serious? you barely speak to me, every time you do speak to me you act like i'm the scum of the earth, you act like i'm not here when i saved your ass and carried you and patched you up, i-”
you cut him off with a kiss. it’s not gentle, it’s rough and messy and your fingers dig into the skin of his cheeks, leaving him red and breathless. he finally gets it. you don’t want him to help you, you want to use him.
he lets you push him down, pin his body to the wall as you kiss him breathless. he lets you dig your nails into his neck even if it hurts. he lets you touch and kiss him as rough or as gentle as you like. and you don’t like being gentle, clearly.
“use me,” he whispers between kisses, and when you pull away, eyeing him intently, as if urging him to explain himself, he does, “do whatever you want. just keep going until you’re satisfied. don’t… don’t hold back. whatever pleases you… i want that. i want to please you.”
“awh, you just want me to be happy with you, don’t you?” you coo at him, endeared by his selflessness. truly a good man in a bad world, “that’s all you’ve ever wanted, hm? for me to like you?”
his resolve cracks just a little bit more, “uhm, yeah…” he his voice is shaky, unsteady, and he just needs to give in.
“then you’re going to let me do this every single time in horny and need something to get myself off. i’m going to do whatever i want to you, and i’m not going to ask. you’re just going to let me. if you don’t, then we go right back to being enemies, and you really don’t want that, right?”
he stutters aimlessly, his knees going weak. he’d truly be done for if you weren’t hold him up with a strength he did not know you had.
and you just keep going, “i’m not going to ask or care if it’s a bad time. i want it to be inconvenient, uncomfortable, ill-timed. i want it to be permanently in your head that i can have you whenever i want you. that i can do whatever i want to you.”
“only i get to have you, got it?”
“g-got it,” he mutters weakly, feeling your hands on him, touching him in places he hasn’t been touched in a while. he didn’t realize how desperate he was.
“only i get to touch you, only i… get to fuck you.”
he nods helplessly.
“it’s too bad i didn’t bring a dildo in my bag when we set off for this mission, because i would so fuck you with it until you’re seeing stars and apologizing for going behind my back… but i suppose i’ll just have to satisfy myself with your cock…”
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h0n3yj4y · 2 years
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Mean!Mike x Fem Reader
Nsfw - aged up Mike to 19 👍
Warnings: smut, rough sex, cursing, mocking, degrading, chocking, light slapping, Master/Daddy kink (both cuz why not), overstimulation i think, climax denial, licking lol, he yells at u a lil, idk what else to put but u get the gist 🤭 its a bit of a slow burn, theres build up to the actual rough sex so yea
-
You and ur boyfriend Mike where in his basement watching a movie that honestly neither of u were paying attention to. Why? Well, a certain someone was slowly inching their hand further up ur thigh.
Mike loved doing this, in public places, around friends, just to see ur reaction and how easily wet u got over him trailing his hand up and down ur thigh, occasionally tightly gripping it which would make u gasp, that would make him smirk at u. He'd have a cocky smile, proud of himself.
But this time Mike had other plans than just lightly teasing u like this. Instead of stopping, he kept going, until he reached ur clothed cunt, you were only wearing underwear and one of Mike's oversized sweaters, so it was very easy access for him. He softly rubbed a few figure eights which made u let out a shaky breath due to the sensation. U turned ur head to Mike who was still looking at the movie, pretending as he wasn't doing anything but oh but he knows what hes doing to you.
You started to squirm a little, getting impatient, softly whimpering. "Did i tell you you could move, slut.?" you then heard ur boyfriend say in a stern tone as he pulls his hand away and looks down at you with an intimidating gaze, a gaze that would make u melt and obey his every command. You looked up at him shyly and shaked your head "n-no..." - "No what? Hmm?" - "N-no...Master.." you look away from him feeling a bit embarrassed, you liked this all too much tho.
You felt Mike grab ur chin and aggressively turn your head to face him "Look at me when im talking to you bitch!" you flinch a lil at his sudden raise of voice. "I-im sorry Master, it wont happen again..." - "Good girl, it better not."
You were used to Mike getting aggressive like this when it came to doing intimate things, it was all part of him asserting dominance and you loved every part of it but tried not to let him know, though we all know he does. You were terrible at hiding when you really liked something, he could easily tell.
"You know, i think a lil slut like you deserves a punishment. You'd like that wouldn't you?" hearing those words come out of Mike's mouth made u squeeze ur thighs together tightly, it was so fucking hot. You completely forgot that he still had his hand resting on ur upper thigh, so he felt u press ur thighs together. He smirks "Guess that's a yes huh? Thought so."
He took his hand of ur chin as he pinned u down on the couch, both hands above ur head. His other free hand roamed down to ur dripping cunt as he removed ur underwear then raising the sweater over ur stomach for better access and view. You tried to get away from his grip but he tightened his grip on ur wrists, making u whimper in pain. There was no chance of u ever getting away from his grip, he was way stronger than u anyways.
Mike notices that and smiles innocentlg at u "Aww, did i accidentally hurt my lil baby?" he asks u with a lil pout "y-yes, a lil bit" his innocent act goes away very quickly after u say that, his facial expression drops to a stern one. "Well suck it up cuz there's more where that came from and i promise you it'll be way worse if u dont obey, ok Bunny?" you quickly nod, obeying him and trying ur best to not disobey him or do anything that will upset him again. Though u kinda want to provoke him, you love when his voice gets all deep and serious, it has a nice rasp, its very, very hot. You love it even more when hes rough with u like this, its a feeling like no other.
As you were drifting off thinking of how hot and amazing ur boyfriend is, u feel 2 fingers being shoved inside u, making u let out a loud moan as u arch ur back, not really expecting him to start off so harshly already.
"uh- uh, did i tell you that you could moan whore? You better stay quite or else, ok?" u bite ur lip and nod. He starts to pump and curl his long digits in and out of u, hitting ur sweet spot everytime without missing. This is making u go crazy, u don't know how longer u can stay quite.
As ur trying super hard to keep ur mouth shut, you see Mike lean down towards ur clit, looking at u with a devilish smirk as he starts to swirl his tongue on it at a painfully good rhythm. This is what brakes u, u cant hold it in anymore. You let out a loud moan, the overwhelming pleasure being too much. You feel urself getting close causing u too grab at Mikes hair and throw ur head back.
As u do this Mike suddenly stops, he takes his fingers out of u and takes ur hand off his hair as he then hovers over u and leans in ur ear, proceeding to then choke u pretty harshly making u gasp and grab his arm as he then whispers "What did i fucking tell you, hm? I told u to not make a single sound or even touch me, right? So why did you fucking do it you whore? couldn't obey a simple rule that Daddy gave u huh?" he sternly and angrily says in ur ear, nibbling at it a bit harshly, a shiver runs down ur spine, being very intimidated and extremely aroused.
"I-im sorry Daddy, pls it just felt too good, i c-couldn't help myself..." u stutter, Mike tsk's at u as he leans away from ur ear, making eye contact with u. He slaps ur cheek, not too harshly but enough for it to sting a lil as he then grabs ur face "pff, how pathetic. Well, i guess u give me no choice but to harshly fuck ur tight lil cunt, i bet you'd love it if i fucked u dumb, like the good cock slut u are, isn't that right Angel?" that all made u squirm and close ur legs in arousal. You shyly nod ur head but that doesn't satisfy Mike.
"Oh c'mon, us ur words slut. You have a mouth right? Then use it." he shakes ur head a lil as u then stutter out a "y-yes Daddy, p-please" - "Good girl, now be a good slut for ur Master and bend over for me won't u" he places a kiss on ur lips passionately making u smile as u then obey as u turn around and rest on ur elbows, ass up infront of Mike. He slaps ur ass harshly and u let out a quite moan, not expecting that and it hurting a lil but feeling good.
You hear Mike unbuckle his pants as he takes them off and his boxers, throwing them somewhere in the basements floor. You then feel the tip of his dick press againts ur entrance in a teasing way, making u whimper, wanting him so badly.
"Aw what's wrong Bunny? So desperate to have my cock deep inside ur dripping cunt? Ur so wet for me, you know that right?" - "yes M-master please, i want u so badly please. I need ur huge cock deep inside me now" u say with whimpers as u sway ur hips, trying to get some friction, so desperate to have his huge cock inside u.
You hear Mike chuckle "alright Angel, if u say so" u then feel him shove his cock deep inside of you very harshly as he holds onto ur hip with one hand and the other goes to harshly pull ur hair to throw ur head back. You let out very loud moans, the pain and pleasure feeling amazing but also very overwhelming.
You try ur best to not be very loud but its literally impossible at the pace he's going. Mike's pounding into u hard and fast, having no intentions of slowing down. U keep letting out loud moans until u feel 3 fingers being shoved in ur mouth, followed by a harsh pull of ur hair.
Mike leans close to ur ear as he sternly whispers "Shut the fuck up whore, u wouldn't want anyone hearing us now would u? But now that I think about it, you would like it, you'd love for people to know who you belong to and how I make you feel. For everyone to know ur Daddy's lil cock slut." All u can muster out are muffled moans as he starts to go faster and harsher making u roll ur eyes back. Mike rests his head on ghe crook of ur next, biting down harshly making u mewl in pleasure, he then licks the spot he abused since he drew a bit if blood.
U ghen feel a knot forming at ur lower stomach so u try to tell Mike that ur close and u succeed but what u didn't expect was Mike coming to a stop and pulling out of u all of a sudden, letting go of ur hair and taking his fingers out ur mouth.
U moan in confusion and frustration, just being denied ur climax. U are about to say something but Mike then flips you around so that you are laying on your back, facing him. He then shoves himself back inside of u, picking his fast and harsh pace back up, making u arch ur bike and let out even more louder moans. Before you can let out another moan you feel Mike's lips against yours as he kisses you harshly, getting u to shut up or to at least muffle ur slutty moans.
He pulls away for a sec "God shut the fuck up already whore, ur so fucking loud." don't get him wrong he loves hearing ur beautiful moans and how u moan out his name but u were seriously being so loud, u were gonna get eachother caught. He goes back to kissing u, this time choking u a bit to make sure u stay quiet enough.
U loved how his hand perfectly wrapped around ur neck, almost feels as if it was fit to belong around ur neck and ur absolutely living for that.
As Mike continues his fast and harsh pace, u feel a knot form at ur stomach meaning that u were close again. "Mmm M-mike im close" - "Hold it, don't u dare cum yet" u whimpered in agony, u dont think u can hold it, it was too much. "You'll cum when i tell u." he growled, burying his face in the crook of ur neck. U felt him kiss ur neck and nibble at it, licking ur sensitive spot whenever he would suck on ur neck which made u go crazy. U loved the sensation of his warm, soft tongue trailing along ur neck, especially on the places he's marked.
You felt his dick twitch inside u as he says "Cum for me baby, now." - "y-yes Daddy mmm, cum inside me pls, fill me up" u were on birth control so it was ok for Mike to cum inside u. You then let out a loud muffled moan as u clawed at Mike's back, cumming all over his cock as he then let out a moan of his own, climaxing inside of u, filling u up.
You both road out ur highs as he then pulled out of u, both of u catching ur breaths. Mike hovered over u, looking u up and down, smiling down at u, placing a soft kiss on ur lips. You sighed in relief, smiling back at him and cupping his face as u caressed him comfortingly.
"You ok baby? Need anything? Did i hurt u?" Ah yes, anytime u and Mike have harsh sex, he takes good care of u afterwards. Getting all worried and asking you if u need anything every 5 seconds. You loved how caring he was afterwards, he was truly the best. "Im ok Mikey dont worry, u didn't hurt me at all" you smile reassuringly at ur worried boyfriend. "You sure? Please tell me." - "Yes Mike im ok! don`t worry so much, i will be ok, though i don't think i'll be able to walk for awhile."
Mike laughs and kisses ur forehead "Yea i know u won't be able too, gonna have to carry u around like a baby" - "oh fuck off" - "Love you toooo" you both share some laughs and sweet sensual kisses and hand holding. Mike then gets both of u cleaned up, giving u a new pair of underwear and a mute green sweater of his to wear.
U both then go to his room as u fall asleep in eachothers arms. Feeling safer than ever and so very loved.
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A/N: AAAAH this is my first ever ff so plsss don't bash me if its kinda bad. I finished writing this at like 2am im so tired guys. (⸝⸝o̴̶̷᷄﹏o̴̶̷̥⸝⸝)
Anywho, i hope u enjoyed it! I don`t write a whole lot but i might write some headcanons or imagines for Mike or/and Miles in the future. Might do other Finn characters aswell like Richie and Boris. Uuuu maybe i will write some Will Byers stuff and Byler stuff aswell! Who knows we will see, anyways good night now, take care luvs <3
OH ALSO IF THERE ARE ANY SPELLING MISTAKES PLS TELL ME SO I CAN FIX EM, THANK U BYE BYE💛🌻🌼🌾
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socksandbuttons · 5 months
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i love ur bloodmoon thoughts sm and i agree with all of them ‼️‼️
they squandered his character sm and theres barely been any development since he got brought back to life… especially on the KC side. id love to see how youd rewrite it tbh- or if you want feel free to just use this ask as a bloodmoon thoughts dump
ALRIGHT SO We can run along with bm2 But also them going 'no their NOT the original thus we dont need to think about their charascter' as they seemingly established a bit with that but also not? Like that kinda furthers BM's whole arc of being treated like a murder machine (he was LITERALLY rebuilt for that, nothing more than tool!), and yet instead of USING THAT (which like.... we kinda got a bit of that with Eclipse, no i wont get into that.) they go 'HMNNN no, we dont wanna develop this further hes just villain' LIKE. SURE. ALRIGHT. BUT... YOU LITERALLY HAD SO MANY SET UPS WITH LIKE... His weird attachment to monty that one TIME yknow the 'hes my dad!' even tho hes not and its very debatable with Eclipse and KC depending how you wanna go about it (In terms of WHO made bloodmoon its Eclipse whos derived from KC and Moon and SUN.) Where was I YEAH HIS THEME OF NO ONE IS FAMILY BUT BLOODMOON. Only THEY understand that theyre not a tool or worthless! (Yknow just completely missing a way to use their codependence to help further their own coping of SEVERAL THINGS.) Yet he still STILL seeked out and called KC father, he still somewhat has thoughts on family. He's going after EARTH who's just vibin' trying to be accepting, even jealous of LUNAR for 1) being brought back and two) survived Eclipse and lives happily (sorta) and while begrudgingly i must say forgot bloodmoon. (WHICH LIKE. THATS THEIR OWN FAULT FOR NOT DRAGGING LUNAR INTO THAT PLOT EVEN THO HE HAD ALL THIS BLOODMOON INFO DURING THAT WHOLE THING. not used it ONCE. they purposely left lunar out of that and thats annoying. chaos sibligns 4 lyfe) Anyway you COULD so still use that in regards to Sun trying to reach out to them ('I wouldve loved another brother' will forever be brought up. also literally in the same convo sun does admit hed kill em again but WE'RE FOCUSING ON THE FAMILY PART GUYS) I'd have to scrap some like... lets see here.... UmMM i CAN use the attacking lunar thing still. Cause whole jealous thing they didnt understnad their own thoughtS (THEY THOUGHT MONTY WAS THEIR PARENT WHICH LIKE??? a stretch honestly. cmon we know this. theyre definitely making their own excuses) iDK ABOUT attacking earth, cause by that point everyone is kinda dead set on murdering them its actually pretty bad by that point unless KC comes back jesus style and goes 'NO. I'll handle this' proceeds to drag bloodmoon off into the desert for family bonding time (and rehabilitation.) Which he wont but we also gotta remember Bloodmoon is deliberately being used a scapegoat (despite yknow... he did DO all that by his volition still like he WOULD NOT have gone after kc like that if not for ruin going 'hey u wanna see ur dad who totoally didnt care for ur ass' or 'you should totally go kill a bunch of people. and then threaten lunar and earth BUT WAIT no killing ill shock u!' im losing focus but THEY WERE... sort of going somewhere with Bloodmoon not wanting to be a tool. AND having solar interfere (I still hate that whole 'he reminds me of my moon thus he must die'. Retcons... everywhere. Remember when he wanted to save his moon?? yeah? cool cause ill never forget that actually.) KC dying actually WOULDNT have been so bad (aside the... suddenly being an ass about it. But he was direct to bloodmoon about 'BRUH UR BEING USED.' and them never actually... bringing that up too much) angering BM enough to kill KC is actually pretty solid way to use the whole 'Bm not satisfied with Killing' as a very direct way KC's words last on BM especially BM's whole unstable emotions of NOT understanding the feelings theyre going through because of that other than anger (denial, grief, confusion and conflict of how Hurt that mustve been they wanted more family) oh this is getting long and im losing focus.
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AITA for ignoring my friend (? idrk where we r now in friendship terms)
So basically I (14F) was gonna eat with my friend (14F) during lunch period at school, my other friend (14M, lets call him A) texted me and said ‘hey do u wanna sit with me?’ and i responded with ‘sorry i’m sitting with my other friend today !!!’ and then put my phone away (my phone is on silent btw so i didn’t hear them send me any texts other than that) so i thought that was that cause they are a pretty understanding friend and i went to go eat lunch.
In 3rd period after lunch and before it fully started I checked my phone and saw that A texted me some more, I checked the text they sent and it said ‘wow so u only sit with me when it’s convenient for u???’ (for context: i used to sit with these 2 guys during lunch but then one day both of them were sick for a bit so i decided to eat in the stairwells cause i usually ate with them in the cafeteria but the cafeteria is pretty noisy so i only went there to sit with them and ended up finding A in the stairwell and decided to sit with him, and the day before this happened I went to sit with A again but he was at a meeting for a school club thingy) and i responded with ‘i promised my friend that i sat with today that i would sit with them today and me and them haven’t seen eachother for a while !! sorry for responding so late i didn’t see this until now’ and i thought that was that, i will admit i did lie a little in that text with the ‘i promised them’ bit but that was because i knew if i didn’t already have a reason A would be kinda annoying about it, anyways, after i sent that period 3 started and i put down my phone but in the middle of class they sent me a 2 short messages and 1 long message that basically went like ‘ok yeah sure *name*’ ‘k’ and ‘you know i sit fucking alone every single day and when i ask my friend if she wants to sit with me and she says no and doesn’t even invite me to sit with her and her other friend it really fucking hurts’ but i didn’t see that message until 4th period.
So during 4th period (it’s kinda a free period for me like a catch up thing like if u have any work from period 1-3 u do it here but i usually don’t have work so the teacher lets me go on my phone) i went on my phone and saw this, i didn’t know how to respond to it but eventually i did and was like ‘sorry i didn’t know u wanted me to invite u ???? me and my friend were eating lunch in one of the classrooms and idk if the teacher has a thing about people who aren’t in that class who have been invited inviting other kids or something but u didnt imply that u wanted me to invite u but u could’ve just asked and i would’ve asked the teacher and if the teacher allowed it i would also invite u so i’m kinda confused by ur message’ then they sent me a super long texted that was basically the ‘i sit alone’ text just longer and also them being like ‘and ur just saying that u would invite me to be nice but ik if u asked u wouldn’t’ and also im kinda confused cause when we do sit together we just go on our phones and watch like yt videos the most we do is me offering them a pringle and saying bye when the bell rings anyways i sent them another text that was like ‘i don’t think im gonna respond to u anymore after i send this because i feel like it’ll just cause an even bigger argument than what’s happening now’ and silenced notifs from them.
After this while doing something else i went to go text my dad and saw that they sent me ‘i feel like after what happened at *amusement park name here* u genuinely hate me’ (for context what happened at there was i invited them to go to an amusement park with me and they said yes but it turns out they don’t like rollercoasters and i really like rollercoasters so my mom who was there with us was like ‘i’m gonna stay with A and u can do rollercoaster stuff’ so i did and apparently while i was on a rollercoaster he started having a panic attack and my mom said something to him which cause him to spiral even deeper and i saw them after i got off the ride and didn’t realize what was going on and started talking about how fun it was until he audibly started crying then i realized and we had to cut the day short and drive him home but he texted me being like ‘i don’t think we can be friends anymore cause of what ur mom said’ but won’t tell me what my mom said but we made up) and i haven’t responded to him but i did tell ONLY my friend that i did sit with and only her about this and i kinda feel guilty for ignoring him and telling her and she ended finding out who it was even though i never said his name cause they have period 2 together and she hated him even before i told her about this mess and now i don’t know what to do other than ignore his texts and try to avoid him during school
What are these acronyms?
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prettymindset111 · 1 year
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Hi bae <3 I’m here to share my success story and it’s all because of your void challenge 🫢 (im sorry for any mistakes, it’s not my native language)
Backstory: when I first time knew about the void I was literally afraid cuz thought it’s kinda magic place or close to astral and entities will attack me (it’s so hilarious ik please don’t judge old me ✋🏻😭). But I was looking for more info bout that so now I know what that state is. Anyway I had troubles to enter and idk why I just couldn’t do it.
Yesterday I found your challenge and decided to try it cuz it looks so easy??? like you don’t need to do anything but pretend you already that person who can enter the void with ease. I did it during the whole day and at night just simply went to sleep. I used to try to enter every night before and it was tiring tbh.
I just fell asleep and woke up … nowhere?? Like… idek how to explain it on my language lmao. I felt nothing but calmness and pleasure. I wasn’t sure I’m in the void but I decided to affirm for my desires. And thanks to me for doing this cuz it literally was the void. I understood it when woke up in reality today and I have everything I wanted!!! Please I’m not emotional person but my feelings just tear me up from the inside 😭
Let me tell you what I manifested:
Desired face! I didn’t want to change myself too much so I just made my eyes more like feline (similar to Jennie BP) and I looks more prettier then ever + being photogenic.
Desired body! I lost 20kg and now my weight is 40kg with 165cm of height (was 160). I have a thin hourglass body, long legs and perfect skin everywhere.
Perfect voice! In my childhood I could sing but in my teenage smth happened and I started to sound like old rusty door but worse 💀 I dreamed about beautiful voice a long time and now I have it! I swear I sing the whole day and do it with my friends in out chats.
I’ve done my study at university! It was the most shitty thing in my life and it took all my nervous for nothing. I hated this sm but now I finally free omg. And I have my diploma.
$10k on my bank account!
A lot of good friends!
The hottest bf in the universe! Girl I swear he match with all my standards and even better. He treated me like a Goddess but he’s still like dominant?? (lol sry if it sound strange idk)
Some stuffs with my parents like as situations, job and behaviors!
So that’s all for the first time. Next time I’m gonna manifest knowledge of english and korean, more money and financial freedom, get anything just by snapping my fingers, desire wardrobe, desire car and some things with my exes. Maybe I can come up with something else but now I’m just so satisfying with my new life and new me! I’m so thankful to you swettie! Tysm for everything you do. Love you to the moon and back 💕💕💕
AWWW CUTIEE …. i’m so happy for you ….. have fun ur life looks so customized now !! i love you to the 🌙 and back as well because you did it !
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k9wa · 2 years
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༊*·˚ COLLEGE CLICHES. featuring haruchiyo sanzu, manjiro sano, keisuke baji, ken ryuguji, takashi mitsuya.
∴ SYNOPSIS : sappy and stupid college cliches i think the tokyo rev boys would fit.
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∴ CONTENT : highschooler tries to write about college, fluff if you squint, this is a little silly, gn reader (no referring pronouns.)
∴ NOTE : if u would wanna see this with a few other characters feel free to lmk! hope u enjoy :]
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༉‧₊˚. HARUCHIYO SANZU — who is your lifeline in adv calc, when your teacher is the biggest asshole and neither of you are as good at math as you thought.
sanzu slowly rubbed over the skin on his face as his eyes danced between his computer screen and textbook, and he came to the conclusion he genuinely had wanted to just die right then and there. 
his professor was driving him absolutely insane; another old man with a stick up his ass, who he swore only took up teaching to make a bunch of college kids feel like idiots, and it didn’t help that he was shit at his job either. sanzu wasn’t built for school, let alone calculus, and every day he remained in that class he questioned what the fuck possessed him to take it in the first place.
he threw the cover of his textbook closed and picked up his phone, opening his messages to the only reason he hadn’t dropped the aforementioned course.
sanzu: this prof is fucked
sanzu: like seriously wtf is half of this shit
♡: switch courses i dare u
sanzu smirked down at his phone when you had responded so quickly.
you two had made an agreement upon meeting at the beginning of the semester, and quickly bonding over your regret for choosing adv calc; the first person to drop the course owed the other one $100. (a good chunk of money, considering you were both broke.) it was the start of a beautiful friendship, and an even more passionate shared hatred for the man you were meant to be learning under. plus, haruchiyo couldn’t deny that he enjoyed talking to you outside of complaints and 3am meltdowns over whatever the hell the derivative matrix was.
♡: or come study with me
♡: cus idk wtf im doing either
sanzu: switch courses i dare u
♡: kys come over
sanzu snorted to himself, swiftly turning around in his chair and throwing his belongings into his cross body bag. as shitty as his class was, at least he had met someone worth sticking around in it for.
sanzu: im omw relax
♡: can u get coffee on ur way
sanzu: what happened to please
♡: please haruchiyo my favourite man in the whole entire world
sanzu: drop calc with me and i will
♡: shut up tbh
it was worth a shot.
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༉‧₊˚. MANJIRO SANO
— who hit a volleyball straight into your cranium and insisted he buy you lunch as an apology.
embarrassed was an understatement for what you felt.
it was like some terrible romcom, something you only see happen in movies with an unrealistic representation of what post-secondary school was actually like.
some blonde boy— one who you’re sure you could have gone your entire life without knowing rather peacefully— handed you a bag of ice, along with a neatly wrapped egg sandwich from the cafe he’d dragged you to.
“you sure your head is okay?” he watched as you pressed the cold plastic to the back of your skull.
“yeah, i don’t think it hit me as hard as it looked.”
“well, it did kinda knock you off your feet.”
you glared at mikey, and he had to stifle a laugh at the expression on your face.
“i’m sorry! you’ve gotta admit it’s kinda funny right?”
you used your teeth to unwrap some of the parchment paper and took a bite from your sandwich, at least the food was good.
“you nearly took my head off.”
“well it's less funny when you put it like that.”
you couldn’t stop the chuckle that slipped past your lips at how casual he was being, despite the context that you were two total strangers.
“seriously though, ‘m sorry. y’know i never would have hit you if i was playing soccer, volleyball is a shit sport anyway” the way he crossed his arms and pouted like a little kid was the slightest bit endearing. “i mean, why use your hands when your feet work so much better?”
maybe it was the spur of the moment, or the likely concussion giving you a skewed sense of judgement, but part of your brain was starting to like him.
mikey couldn’t explain it either, but a similar part of his brain was glad he had gotten the chance to meet you, though the circumstances weren’t ideal.
“hmmm…i dunno,“
he tilted his head at you, wondering where your sentence was headed.
“i think you’re gonna have to buy me lunch a couple more times to make up for it.”
mikey couldn’t help but smile, he poked your forehead.
“i must have hit you way harder than i thought.”
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༉‧₊˚. KEISUKE BAJI
— who always throws the best parties, but never actually enjoys them unless you show up.
the pounding on the door of your dorm was quick to pull you out of your focus, forcing your nose out of your books. there was only one person who would knock so aggressively at such an ungodly hour, and he’s lucky your desk chair was becoming uncomfortable and you were planning on getting up to stretch your legs anyway.
swinging the door open, there stood baji, hair tied loosely into a bun at the back of his head, and two coolers occupying each of his palms.
he handed one to you, you gladly took it.
“so this is what you’re doin’ instead of partying with me right now?”
keisuke followed you into your dorm, making himself comfortable on top of your bed, you sat on the free space beside him as you cracked open the can in your hand.
“i told you i couldn’t come like, three days ago.” he groaned at your answer.
“i didn’t think that meant y’would actually flake!” you chuckled as you sipped at your drink, eyes playfully rolling back.
“you’re gonna thank me when this exam rolls around and i actually have notes to give you.”
baji’s lips formed a tight line, he hated when you were right.
“what’s the big deal if i didn’t go? literally almost half of campus showed up at your dorm hall anyway.”
he groaned again, yet louder this time, sitting up so he could open his own drink. he reached his free hand out to flick you right in the tip of your nose, earning a quiet ‘ow..’ from you.
“cus it’s lame when you don’t come around!! and who else is gonna take care of me after i blackout huh?” he took a long swig from the can in his fist.
“how about you go drink your body weight and i’ll come get you in an hour?” although the offer was tempting, and you could see keisuke consider it for a moment, he shook his head and flopped back down on your bed.
“nah, rather chill with you anyway.”
he reached over to hold his drink in the air beside you, and you gently cheersed his can, being careful not to spill any liquid on your bed.
“so, the hell is the exam s’posed to be about anyway?”
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༉‧₊˚. KEN RYUGUJI
— who sits in front of you in engineering, and covers up the entire white board in front of you.
not one note.
not one single note in your binder was finished, all half written or only partially filled out. you wouldn’t have bothered spending the money on equipment to take cute notes if you had known some giant would be sitting in front of you. how were you meant to write anything down when you couldn’t even see the damn board?
at first he intimidated you, how could you not be at least a little afraid of a man who stood at nearly twice your size? however, that intimidation quickly turned into pure irritation upon another day of more blank paper, and you were following him out of the room at the end of class before you had a chance to react.
“hey, you.” 
ken turned around to see who was calling out to, who he assumed to be, him. 
“oh, hey—“
“you’re switching seats with me tomorrow .”
“…why—?“
“because you’re way too big and i can’t see anything past you when you’re in front of me! and i am way too behind in my notes to even hope to pass anymore unless i get caught up!”
ryuguji stared down at you, who was oh so short and angry, while blinking silently as he processed the words being said to him. it was surprising how small you started to feel so quickly when he had to crane his neck down to make eye contact.
“we’re like, two weeks into the semester and you’re telling me this now? i would have moved if y’had said something sooner.” ken chuckled and placed a hand on his hip, leaning down to your height with the most smug look suddenly dawning on his features. you opened your mouth to respond, yet only a jumble of stutters fell off your tongue. the irritation had subsided, and the intimidation was back in full throttle.
“i'll tell you what,” he began, “why don’t you sit beside me tomorrow, and i'll share my notes with you so you can catch up.”
well,
you supposed that would work. 
“my way of apologizing for bein’ ‘way too big.’”
…you really did need those notes.
“okay, fine. that’s fine.” with a small bow, you turned around to begin your route to your next class, eager to run away from the awkward conversation you’d stuck yourself in.
“thanks, um, tall…guy— whatever your name is.”
and as quickly as you came, there you went. 
it was about to be a whole other problem when the next day rolled around, and you would discover ryuguji’s terrible handwriting.
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༉‧₊˚. TAKASHI MITSUYA
— who is your favourite study buddy, and knows your cafe order by heart.
the smell of freshly brewed espresso and slightly stale confections danced through the air, a comfortable aroma for mitsuya to sit in while he scribbled at a design that had been picking his brain all day. the headphones in his ears played some random pre-made lo-fi playlist as he sipped his coffee (—black, 2 sugars) that had long turned lukewarm, yet was just hot enough to warm his palm through the paper cup. the booth by the window he was slouched in was empty, save for him of course, and he waited ever so patiently for his classmate to join him and fill the space across from him.
the sound of the cheap bell above the cafe’s doors chiming alerted him that you had finally arrived, and he pried his attention away from his doodles to see you shuffling over to the spot you both had become perfectly familiar with, laptop in hand along with a knit hat and matching scarf keeping you warm from the autumn breeze.
“how late am i?” you plopped down in your seat, placing the tote bag hanging from your shoulder onto the seat beside you.
“probably,” he checked his phone, “twenty minutes.” mitsuya pulled his headphones down so they sat slack around his neck. 
you groaned at his answer, you hadn’t meant to have gotten so hung up with club activities.
“i’m sorry, this stupid– festival is seriously giving us a run for our money. i didn’t even realize what time it was.”
takashi listened to you intently, nodding his head quietly as he pushed a small plate towards you; a croissant decorated in your favourite jelly, as well as a coffee cup similar to his own, the only difference being the mound of cream and sweetener inside yours.
the action had become so normal, you hadn’t even paid any mind to the way he would always order for you anymore, having your order ready by the time you arrived to meet him was just the usual.
mitsuya truly remembered the littlest details about your coffee order, from how thick you liked the foam on top to the temperature. not to mention his mental database of the variety of pastries you would eat alongside them.
“tell me about it. what’s your club doing again?”
he remembered, takashi just enjoyed the way you got so excited talking about it.
he listened to the way you rambled on, the way you so easily talked to him, how you could do it for hours, and not once would he be anywhere near sick of hearing the sound of your voice
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⠀ ⠀ ⠀m.list⠀ ღ⠀send me an ask!⠀ ღ⠀navi
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adambja · 5 months
Note
GIRL FIRST OF ALL LET ME TELL U THAT I LOVE U AND UR TAPE SO FUCKING MUCH😭🫶
So basically I was listening to the tape yesterday and at first I didn’t notice any changes like yk right after listening BUTTTT at the evening I read a few success stories and I read bout the alpha state and I thought that sounds good yk. BUTTT THENNN idk WHAT happened but suddenly I felt so confident that I will enter the void. (I still few like this and I listened to the tape again). Like idk 😭 tbh it’s such an amazing feeling like I just know that I can enter the void. Anyways I was sick today so I caught the opportunity to use the alpha state and I realised that I was more idk something than the other days. I wasn’t as frustrated when I didn’t wake up in the void because I just know that I will. OMG I can describe the feeling now: knowing.
Sorry for the long ask 😭
You are very welcome and just manifest something 😭!! Try to manifest something and enter the void you don't have to stop manifesting to enter the void!! In fact you can't stop manifesting!!
I think..... I know what you need 😭😭😭😭
Pls like wait for the free tiny void tape 😭😭
It will be incredibly powerful lmao
Enjoy your day baby also don't be sorry I love cute long asks 😭😭 but it's so bad if they are trauma dumbing or sumn!
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princessbrunette · 6 months
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hello hi idk if you're taking requests or no but I'm just here sharing my Leon thoughts because you characterise him SO WELL it tickles my brain in all the right places lmao so I thought youd might understand. I was the one who sent a huge ask on appreciating the handcuffs kinktober fic and since then best friend Leon is living in my head rent free oml. The potential subtle sexual tension? The subtle skinship? The playfights? The pining? Omg. One specific trope/scenario I see them having is Leon coming home tired from work and reader offering a small massage which starts off innocent but turns out to end with high sexual tension. Only if I were better at art I WOULD'VE drawn this lmao. Anyways I'll go and be a little more delulu about this (also I'm 19 turning 20 in four months, ik you have mdni so I thought I'd let you know!)
thank u for sharing ur age,, it always puts me at ease when anons do this so that’s v sweet <33
and ugh yes,, i just wanna dote on him and be sweet for him even as a best friend when u don’t technically “owe” him anything 😩 just giggling at the slight awkwardness as you slip your hands up the back of his shirt into untouched territory, rubbing the sore muscle under your palms.
asking him “hows that?” all shy, trying so hard to look after him and all he can think is WIFE WIFE WIFE WIFE
and he feels himself get all hot, and a little pink in the cheeks and sits up a little, turning to look at you and bashfully asking “i can take my shirt off, if that helps a little?” in that soft silky voice mmMHHM
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jackfrombaskinrobbins · 10 months
Text
baking contest w/ the avengers!!
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type of writing: headcanons / scenario
word count: 1k
request: yes / no
original request: OMG CAN U PLS DO THE AVENGERS IF THEY HAD LIKE A COOKING OR BAKING CONTEST?
dynamic: avengers x teen!reader (teenage avenger series)
characters: reader, scott lang, nick fury, clint barton, harley keener, peter parker, miles morales, tony stark, pietro maximoff etc
a/n: HECK YEAH I CAN!!!! i loved this idea sm i was so excited to get this request :D i'm getting back into writing so sorry if it's a lil bad lol. also guys i'm gonna open requests again so feel free to submit!! i have a lot of muse for spiderverse stuff atm hehe so i may post again today!! tysm, hope u enjoy!!!
taglist: @shefollowedthestars @thecloudedmind @ayohitmanddaeng
(fill out this form to be on my taglist!)
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so there’s this thing that the avengers do
in order to do team bonding
they’ll assign partners in the beginning of the year
& each month, a new set of partners will choose something to do
and it’s always super fun
like that’s how u ended up at the trampoline park last month
& how scott ended up with a broken arm rip king
so this month had to be something a little less dangerous
kinda funny when u think about it like it’s literally the avengers they’re in dangerous situations all the time
and while you wanted to do something different, certain ~forces~ kept preventing that
like y’all were watching a movie a couple weeks ago
and fury came on the screen 
how he could hack into it idk hes nick fury dude he can do anything
but he just looked at the camera and said “no more dumbass trampoline parks”
HAH
so yeah it had to be something tame 
anyway so this month was you and scott!!!!
best duo ever!!!!!!
so you had to plan what to do
& scott refused to go skydiving bc that was your first choice
smh scott it would be so fun!!!!
his arm was still broken & he said that was why he wouldn’t go but like…. scott we know ur a scaredy-cat
anyway you were trying to decide when suddenly he was like
“y/n!!!! i totally forgot! the great british baking show just premiered and i promised clint we could watch it together!”
and that gave you an idea
scott LOVED it
but y’all needed a couple things before 
first of all, u needed baking supplies
when i say baking supplies i mean BAKING SUPPLIES
there’s like a thousand avengers at this point bruh :’)
scott almost got one of those instacart orders for it but u hated the thought of an instacart person getting ur crazy order
so it was store time :D 
let’s just say tony’s credit card was used very well that day 😛
then it was time to pick teams
not everyone had to participate
wanda said she wanted in
so pietro joined too which was slightly concerning
the man literally burnt a bowl of cereal once
and ur probably thinking “how—”
EXACTLY
only you and harley saw it and honestly it rendered u both speechless
tony joined too
but you and scott made sure he knew that there could be NO robots 
vision asked to be a judge
scott said “vis, we really appreciate that but… uh… don’t you like not eat?”
“ah! you are correct, scott. i do not consume food in the traditional way. however, given my vast knowledge & global database, i do believe that i would be a very good judge of presentation and overall ingredient chemistry.”
“alright, you do that buddy!”
also off topic but why do i just know that tony would give vision the nickname “chat gpt”
 sorry i had to get that out ANYWAYY
you got a few more people to participate 
sam and bucky wanted to be a team, and harley peter & miles wanted to be a team too
yknow what that was fine by you
so the day came.
you had turned one of the empty conference rooms into a crazy kitchen setup
thx party city for the confetti & balloons!!! ;)
in came your loyal hosts, scott & clint
(clint begged you and scott to let him host, he kept using a british accent until you said yes & just trust me it was good that he finally stopped)
you, natasha, and vision were the taste & presentation judges
you surveyed scott’s & your work, pretty proud of how it turned out
“ALRIGHTY THEN, READY, SET, OFF THE BLIMEY!!”
vision shot you a quizzical look, but you just shook your head.
scott & clint rly were a…. hosting duo
yep, the most… hosting duo of all time
the hostiest hosters to ever host
omg the funniest thing was that they kept eating the cookie dough from harley peter & miles’ station
they literally had to push them away
peter & miles webbed their hands shut HAHA
everyone else seemed to be doing pretty well though
aside from their usual arguing, bucky & sam seemed to actually be making something good
wanda was perfect as per usual
and pietro was zipping around the kitchen, causing tony’s flour to rise up in his face
steve came over, blowing a whistle and pointed at pietro
you and scott had enlisted him to be the referee
yes, cooking shows don’t normally have referees, but think abt the ppl we’re dealing with here 😀
anyways finally time was up!!!
but you and scott still had a trick up your sleeves.
“and now presenting our special guest judge… GIVE IT UP FOR NICK FURY!!”
yes that’s right, he had said yes to this
after you promised to finish a mission report for him
and bought him some new eyepatches
which was why he was wearing a navy blue one complete with rhinestones
pietro was up first, and he placed four slices of chocolate cake in front of all the judges.
“i gotta say p, this actually looks really good!” you spoke, and he beamed.
natasha didn’t look so sure
“as y/n says, it does look alright on the outside. however, it does seem like there’s some sort of… strange ingredient in the chemical makeup… i am going to analyze for a moment.” said vision
“aw, let’s just eat the damn thing already!” fury spoke, and so you all did.
“mm, it’s good!!” you said, and natasha nodded in agreement.
but did not have the same reaction. 
he had stopped chewing, and his eye had narrowed. he was giving pietro a death stare.
“uhm… fury? what is … jolly wrong with you?” scott asked, his british accent wavering.
“yeah… guv’nr?” said clint.
“who the hell puts hot sauce in a damn chocolate cake. you better start runnin’ maximoff, because i’m comin’ for you!!” fury spoke, getting progressively louder.
“that one was supposed to be for y/n- i mean vision! yeah! oops. um…” pietro spoke, before disappearing from the room in a quick streak.
after that, fury left. 
and that's why now cooking/baking competitions are banned on the premises of SHIELD!!
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ddejavvu · 2 years
Note
Idk if ur still doing requests for hotch but here's one that i think would be very funny. Imagine if Morgan or Sean or someone with a death wish put Viagra in Hotch's backpack or something and you're like his gf/subordinate or something and you're about to do the deed and while looking for a condom you find the pills and ask him if he's having trouble with you know what and he is embarrassed but also confused then angry because he obvsly figures it out. Feel free to make any necessary changes, I just think the viagra thing would be so funny.
Instead of the flexible foil packet that you're expecting in the inner pocket of Aaron's briefcase, you find a stiff cardboard box. It's bulky, doesn't fit well in the space, and you peer concernedly at it to see what it is.
It's Viagra.
Instantly, you turn sympathetic. Aaron is certainly older than you, and you don't blame him for showing signs of his age. You're sure it must be embarrassing for him, though, so you approach the situation delicately.
"Aaron," You call over your shoulder, the man already lounged over his desk chair waiting for you to come back, "You need one'a these?"
"A condom? Yes," He chuckles confusedly, "I thought that's why you went over there."
"No, these." You show him the box of pills, "You need water too, yeah?"
You keep your voice as casual as possible, hoping that he won't be embarrassed about needing the extra help. Really, you don't care how he does it, you're just happy to have it working.
"I- what? Where did you get those?" You watch his cheeks flush, a brighter red than you've ever seen them, "Those aren't mine!"
"They were in here," You gesture to the bag, "Really, Aaron, it's not a big deal, I don't care. You don't have to lie."
"No, really!" He sits up now from where he was leaning back comfortably in his chair, "They aren't mine, I don't know why they were in there."
You narrow your eyes at him suspiciously, "You're sure? I'm not judging you."
"Seriously," He groans, "I haven't.. needed help before. You know it works fine."
You snort amusedly at the evidence he offers, a now less-prominent bulge in the fabric of his slacks. Apparently being accused of old age didn't do much for him.
"How did it get there, then?"
"I don't know," His brow slipped down into its familiar furrow, "I don't let anyone touch my briefcase. There was only- oh my god."
"Oh my god?" You echo, waiting for him to elaborate. Now his cheeks steam red with anger, and he stands abruptly.
"I told Morgan he could grab a file from inside this morning when we were in the briefing room. He must have slipped it in there."
"Don't fire him." It's half a joke, and half not. It's not like Derek had known his little prank would backfire horribly to where you found it, but that's because no one knows that you and Aaron are together in the first place.
"When I'm done with him he'll wish I had just let him go," Aaron grumbles, striding for the door before you can stop him, "Wait here."
He throws open the door without hesitation, his voice booming as he calls Morgan to his doom. At first Morgan smirks, knowing his joke has finally been discovered, but as he traipses obediently into Aaron's office, his smile drops.
His eyes meet yours, and you balk. You have no idea what to do, but you're still holding the box and Aaron is slamming the door behind him now, closing you three into the room together.
"When I said you could grab a file from my bag?"
"Y/N.. you-! You and Y/N!" Derek seems somehow unaware of the fuming man beside him, gawking at the package in your hand, "You- You!"
"Me," You supply lamely, "Good one, Morgan."
"What were you thinking?" Aaron snaps, and Derek finally turns to him.
"I was thinking it was a funny jab to call you ancient. I wasn't thinking you were banging my coworker!"
"He's not- argh," You let out a choked groan, burying your face in your hands, "Just apologize, Morgan."
"What would Strauss say?"
You know it's an empty threat, but you watch Aaron's face shift anyways. It's miniscule, barely there, but his frown flattens out and his eyes widen ever so slightly.
"She's not going to think. She won't know."
"I could run over and tell her right now." Derek tilts his head to the door, "I think she'd really like to know about this."
"Derek please-," You start, but he holds out a hand towards you, effectively silencing you.
Aaron takes a deep breath, one where he needs to close his eyes to collect himself. When they open again they're dulled, rage no longer flaming in his irises.
"Please do not report us."
"Why not?" Derek raises an eyebrow, a smirk barely concealed by whatever willpower he had left.
"Because I.." Aaron struggles to speak, lamely finishing, "I will forget that this happened if you will."
"Deal." Derek is far too quick to take Aaron's bribe, and you scoff lightly at his blackmail strategy, "Oh, and I wanna leave early today."
"Don't push it." Aaron's voice is strained as he watches Morgan start for the door.
"She's not in a meeting right now," Derek grins devilishly, "I could walk right in."
"You're dismissed for the day." Aaron finally mutters, his grip on the back of your chair so tight that you swear the wood is splintering, "And take this back," He plucks the box from between your fingers, chucking it at Derek's head, "I don't need it."
"Ew," Derek dodges it, swatting it back onto the floor just inside Aaron's office and quickly shutting the door behind him, "Keep it just in case, old man!"
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mothman-can-write · 3 months
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hi !!! i saw u said you were open for prompts, i mean this is kinda less of a prompt really, but like i loved that blackhill mission transcript thing you did a while ago and would be really cool to see some more stuff in the same vein ig ! but also maybe something like a kinda blackhill first meeting kinda thing idk !! i just love your work tho ! you really have the ability to make me feel all the emotions
OOOOO i just thought of this whilst writing this but maybe something like with clint teasing nat ab having like feelings for maria or something ?? idk i just love ur writing ! sorry these are kinda shitty hahah
NGL I took this prompt and mangled it in my hands. I heard first meeting and my brain was immediately like well that could go seventeen thousand different ways, so I sorta mashed in Clint's teasing to go along with it and made it a little more suggestive than outright shippy. Realistically, I think if Natasha is only meeting Maria for the first time, she's probably still in a place where she's not totally open to such self indulgent things as having a crush
Also, this isn't a mission transcript but I'd love to do more of them that one was really fun! I just don't really have any good ideas for the sort of things they'd have to talk about in the field besides dying haha
ANYWAY enough rambling, though you're all familiar with my inability to shut up these days. ~3k under the cut of Clint being a ballache and nat being sceptical but gay
The only person that doesn’t treat Natasha like she’s a project – or a live wire –  is Clint. He’d had his fair share of looking at her with those careful eyes, something behind them that made her teeth itch in her gums like some trained dog. He doesn’t do that so much anymore, not unless she’s in a particular state and doing a very bad job at hiding it. She likes him, she thinks. He might be one of the first people in her entire life that she can truly say she likes. 
Naturally, she finds herself in his quarters more often than her own. She lays on his bed as he works on something probably explosive enough to kill them both if he sneezes, and she ignores the pip of her emails as she braids a small strip of hair under her ear. She’s bored, if she’s honest, but she doesn’t want to waste her first free morning of the past fortnight on something so trivial as emails. Or helping Clint. 
“You not gonna answer her?” he says without looking up from his work. He holds it close to his face, something far too small in his tweezers. 
Natasha’s fingers pause in untangling her braid. “How do you know who it is?” 
He still doesn’t turn in his seat, matter of fact when he speaks. “You have a different tone for Hill.” 
“How did you figure that out?” She tries not to scowl at him, but she still isn’t used to feeling so see-through. Quite frankly, she’d like to be as opaque as possible, but she seems to have grown rather attached to someone with x-ray vision. 
Clint puts his miniature contraption down and turns to her at last. She’s not fond of the smile on his face as he leans over the back of his chair. “You’re not the only spy on the ship. Also, you weren’t trying very hard to hide it.” 
“Her emails are usually more important,” Natasha argues, not quite sure why she feels the need to defend herself on it. 
Clint grins ever wider. “I never asked why. I just thought you had a massive crush on her.” 
Natasha scowls fully this time. “I’ve never met her.” 
He shrugs. “I don’t know what’s in those emails.” 
“Shut up.” 
She reaches for her phone anyway and pointedly ignores the way Clint watches her. The email is much the same as they always are, telling her about meetings and progress and such. She’s overtly professional in every one, but now that she’s thinking about it, Natasha likes the words she uses – just slightly like she enjoyed reading dictionaries as a child. Very, very rarely, Maria will let something slip in her emails that is almost like humour, and Natasha doesn’t tell Clint that she actually does enjoy receiving emails from her just for the fact that she feels a little special when that happens. She’s heard the rumours; she knows not to expect giggles and grins when it comes to the Assistant Director. 
In the end, she doesn’t bother to respond to the email anyway and Clint has already turned back to his work. “Not in the mood to sext her back?” 
She scowls at the back of his head. “It sounds like Laura needs to watch her back.” 
“Oh, god,” he laughs. “Gross. Absolutely not. Not my type.” 
“What makes you think she’s mine?” 
“You need someone to match your weirdness.” 
Natasha wishes she had something to throw at him. She won’t admit that she intrigues her in small ways. She doubts she’s any different from every other CEO and government lead in the world, but some small part of her feels thankful to her faceless emails. She could’ve easily overridden Clint’s choice, could’ve had her put down before she could even think to beg for forgiveness. But she’d given her a chance, and she’d kept in contact despite her supposed overbooked schedule every day since. Maria held her life in her hands at one point, and she’d given her another shot at it. 
Despite everything, Natasha still doesn’t sleep well. Or, rather, because of everything, she supposes. One good month doesn’t erase a lifetime of bad – and she’s really a little hesitant to say that this month has even been good in many senses of the word. She wonders if the nights will ever get easier on her with time, or if she’s stuck with these hours of restlessness and sweat for the rest of her life. It’s not a nice thing to think about, and it doesn’t really do all that much to distract her from the shadows that still play behind her eyelids or the way the shapes of the room still seem to swim around the edges. So, she swings her legs over the side of her bed and scrubs at her face with her hands. She can appreciate, at the very least, that she isn’t handcuffed to her bed here. Somehow, that had been a hard thing to get used to. She still sleeps with one arm by the headboard. 
There aren't many things to do at this hour. Clint has told her countless times that she’s perfectly welcome to pester him at any time of the night if it would make her feel even minutely better. He says he understands, and she believes him enough from the way his past lines his own face, but it doesn’t make it any easier to put into practice. 
She doesn’t have a plan as she steps out into the corridors. She dresses like she’s going to the gym on the off chance that she might be able to sneak into it and punch something until she’s sweaty for reasons more tangible. She wishes the firing range was usable at this hour, but she’s sure that’s much less subtle. Still, there are some nightmares you can only really feel better by shooting at. Maybe she’ll bat her eyelashes into an hour or so at the targets tomorrow. 
She passes the odd agent as she trails around the corridors and considers that the ship never really sleeps entirely. There’s always someone on the night shift, always someone pottering around with something. She thinks it would be nice to work when it’s so quiet. Maybe she should ask about changing her hours. It might be a little soon. 
The gym isn’t so far from her quarters, and by the time she reaches it her shirt still feels sticky at her back and her stomach still feels like it’s alive in her ribcage. Her hopes are low enough to limbo as she presses her hand to the door, and she could almost sigh with relief when the door opens easily. She’s not against breaking in, but she likes to think she’s been doing a pretty good job of building a better reputation lately. Maybe not socially, but Maria’s emails haven’t managed to sound short lately – not since the last time she’d bypassed what she maintains was a criminally simple encryption on one of Clint’s jobs. 
The gym is utterly silent at this time of the morning, which is entirely unsurprising. She doubts anyone else sensible gets out of bed for another hour or two, let alone starts their training regime. Generally, agents are allowed the privilege of breakfast before they’re worked to the bone. Natasha’s never been a fan of food so early in the morning. 
She doesn’t really know when she fell out of the habit of scanning each room on this ship like someone will be waiting to haul her out of it, and she blames it firmly on her lack of sleep and nightmare slurred thoughts when she doesn’t notice the other body in the gym until it’s too late. 
“I did wonder,” someone says, and Natasha’s attention snaps to one of the benches on the far side, half covered from the entrance. 
It takes Natasha an almost embarrassingly drawn out moment to place her features, and she’s sure she only half succeeds in hiding her surprise into an intrigued eyebrow. The Assistant Director didn’t really strike her as the type to be in the gym when everyone is supposed to be sleeping. 
“Wonder what?” she asks instead of every other question that gnaws at her head. She stays firmly planted in the middle of the room. 
“Who would come in at this time.” 
Oh. She’s not wondering about Natasha. She doesn’t really know what that feels a mote disappointing. She hates it when Clint asks how she’s sleeping. Maybe she just doesn’t like lying to him. 
“I thought it would be empty.” 
Maria places her water bottle beside her on the bench and makes absolutely no move to stand up yet. Somehow, Natasha finds it unnerving, even if she’s taller here. “It usually is,” she says simply. 
Her eyes bore into her in a way that makes the back of her neck crawl. Something about her says that she’s calculating, that she’s looking at Natasha and breaking her down into little bite sized pieces. Natasha has never liked being dissected. Maria’s eyes are very blue. 
“Do you usually spend your mornings here?” she asks, if only to stop Maria from burning holes into her skull and reading her thoughts directly. 
It works, in the way that her gaze flicks away for the briefest moment before pinning her again in that same cool tone. “I guess you could call this morning.” 
“That doesn’t answer my question.” 
Maria’s eyes soften ever so slightly around the corners, and Natasha would almost call it a squint. “I’ve made a bit of a habit at this point, yes.”
She almost seems reluctant to admit it, and Natasha can’t help the way she wants to pick this woman apart. She has always liked puzzles, and people are just some of the more complex the world has to offer. She thinks she understands the rumours a little more now, even through this uncanny meeting. She wonders if Maria feels her own searching gaze as intently. 
Maria stands at last, and Natasha had almost forgotten how tall she is. She thinks she preferred it when she was sitting. “Don’t let me stop you,” she says, and Natasha is silently thankful for the way that answers her question. Again, not that she wouldn’t break the rules. It’s just much harder to make an excuse when the Assistant Director is the one who catches you. 
“I would’ve expected the AD to send me back to my quarters,” she notes, as forward as ever when it gets her information. She’ll admit this woman seems to be intriguing. She’s curious as to just why she’s indulging her so far. 
Maria’s expressions are all very small, mere suggestions of emotions that only make Natasha want to pick her apart. “That would make me more of a hypocrite than I already am,” she says simply, almost smiling. “Are you getting on okay?” she asks instead , and her eyes are on her like she’s deciphering her again. She’s closer now, making direct eye contact, and Natasha holds it like a game. “Besides the obvious, of course.” 
Natasha tries not to scowl. God, does she hate when people pretend like they know her. “What’s the obvious?” 
Maria raises one eyebrow ever so slightly, her expression caught somewhere to amusement. “Did the Red Room have you in the routine of training at four in the morning?” 
“Sometimes.” They both know that’s not the reason that she’s here, as much as Natasha wishes Maria didn’t. 
Her eyes are almost soft. Almost like she truly cares about her. Natasha doesn’t like to let herself believe the sort of things that might cost her later. “Half of the people on this ship struggle with it, Romanoff,” she says, nearly gentle in the silence around them. “You don’t have to be ashamed of it.” 
She can almost imagine her setting a heavy hand on her shoulder as she says it, though Maria remains in her own space. She’s still slightly too close for what Natasha is used to however, and it’s the first time she realises the darkness under her eyes. Her face is lined, something bone deep that she doubts ever goes away. It lends her a certain sort of…imperfection that makes her seem a whole lot more human. For everything she’s heard, though she knows to take gossip with a healthy grain of salt, she could almost imagine Hill to be some sort of robot, some living excel sheet. 
Standing in front of her, she sort of just looks like a woman who could do with some sleep. She looks like a woman who has spent the last who-knows-how-many hours beating out her own past the same way Natasha intends to. She won’t call it affection. It doesn’t mean Natasha likes the way she looks straight through her any more. 
“You have any tips?” she says, aiming for something playful. She really, really just wants her to stop looking at her like she can figure her out right here in the middle of the room. Maybe if she seems better than she is, she’ll leave her alone. She’d rather her conduct a genuine vivisection out on the boxing ring floor if she’s going to continue to examine her. 
She’s certain Maria almost smiles at that, a tug at the corner of her lips that is almost sad, almost conspirational. She shrugs ever so slightly. “Shooting things usually helps.” 
Natasha tries not to scowl like a child. As if she wouldn’t be there right now if she could get away with it. “I’m on supervised arms training.” 
This time, Maria does smile, though Natasha thinks she’d have missed it if she blinked. “Not from tomorrow,” she says plainly, and Natasha can only watch her walk away without another word. 
The door closes behind her, and Natasha lets herself furrow her eyebrows as deeply as she likes. She is overtly aware that she is not being let off of supervised training tomorrow. She’s aware that she has been seen as a weapon and an explosive since the moment Clint forgot that he was meant to shoot her. Somehow, she doesn’t think that Maria is one to tease. 
It makes it very hard to punch things as effectively as she’d like to when she can only think after Maria. She wonders what keeps her up at night. She wonders what else she does to get rid of the shadows. She wonders why on earth she would let her off of the hook so early. For all they know, Natasha might decide to defect back. She might’ve been biding her time until she could get a hand on one of those guns outside of the range. She’d never even dream of it, of course. She’d rather be supervised for every split second a gun is in her hands for the rest of her life than have to go back to her life before. She wonders just how deep Maria managed to dig. She wonders if she really is all that transparent after all. 
She finds herself in Clint’s quarters again as thoughtlessly as breathing. Every spare minute in her schedule that lines up with his, she’ll spend hiding from the rest of the world. This time, she’s sitting in his chair, her knees resting against the edge of his desk so that she can spin it slightly from side to side. Clint is behind her in his bunk, his arms tucked up behind his head and his eyes closed. It’s only 2pm. Natasha wishes she could have a nap too. 
“Is she always like that?” she says on a whim, her thoughts still stuck on tired eyes and snap decisions. 
“Like what?” Clint asks, completely brushing over her lack of context. 
“So…intense.” 
“Ah, we’re back on Hill. Yes.” He falls silent again, and Natasha listens to his breath. “Hold on.” His eyes open and his head turns on his pillow to face her. “Did you meet her? When?” 
“This morning.” 
“You were at the range this morning.” 
“Before that.”
“You were asleep before that.” She doesn’t answer, and that tells him everything in as little effort as possible. “Natasha.” 
She doesn’t meet his eye. “It’s better than moping.” 
“You don’t need to mope. You can come wake me up.” 
“But then you don’t sleep.” 
“Tasha, do you really think I’m sleeping well either half the time?” 
She stays silent again, staring intently at the dimples Clint’s chair has made in the carpet. 
“How did you even find her?” he asks eventually, giving up the argument for the countless time. “She’s practically booked to the minute.” 
“She was in the gym when I got there.” 
“I’m going to skip over the fact that you’d rather punch something until you bleed than come and bug me. Was it worth it? Was she all sweaty and hot? Did you two finally canoodle in person?” 
She doesn’t dignify his jokes with a response, her thoughts plain in her expression. “I don’t think she sleeps well either. She looked tired.” 
Clint grins a little. “You paying attention to her face?”
Natasha scowls at him. “It’s normal to look someone in the eye.” 
“Mhm…” He retucks his arms under his head, settling back against his pillow. “It’s for sure normal to think about them all morning.” 
“She took me off of probation,” she says, almost in a rush, like maybe this will change the subject – maybe a little bit like she’s admitting something. 
“Oh you definitely have a crush on her. It’s like she’s trying to get in your pants. Remind me never to read your emails.” 
Natasha only squints at him, wishing once again that she had something appropriate to throw. The urge distracts her enough that she never does reject the notion. And when she finds herself imagining Maria’s secret little smile in those few and far casual emails, she decides that Clint doesn’t need to know. She’s not been given many chances in her life, and she thinks she could make space in her life for two instead of one. She wonders if Maria would ever want a gym buddy on long nights and promptly decides not to think any deeper into it. 
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