#anyway I haven’t done makeup in what feels like weeks so I went all out with dark plum smoky eye for this small Tuesday evening party | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

imisskacchan · 9 months

Text

In Over Your Head

Words: 10.6k

TW: Emotional Manipulation, Toxic Relationship, Possessive Behavior, Self Harm

You had been with Bakugo for a few months now. It was safe to say he’s much more difficult to deal with one on one. At first he couldn’t of treated you better, he was always buying you things and taking you out. Now it’s different ever since his father passed its like he became a whole new person. Other people wouldn’t notice of course. No he’d never let them see past the facade he put up.

But to you each mark he left on your pliant body was just a reminder of how much he changed. His drinking never helped either, most of the time when he woke up he never remembered the tangents he went on. Either the booze didn’t let him remember or he just didn’t want to. And you, well you hid it well not letting anyone see the bruise or scratches that covered your skin. You said it was so you didn’t have to answer anyone’s prying questions, you were more than capable of taking care of yourself. But in reality you didn’t want Katsuki to get in trouble. Even after all he’s done to you there’s no doubt you love him more than yourself so you put up with his antics because there’s no way you could live without him.

You sat up slowly careful not to overexert yourself. Last night Katsuki came over after partying and wasn’t the least bit gentle as he took out his anger on you. Intricate patterns of blues, purples, and greens marred your skin. Just adding to the list of marks you had to cover up, great. You made your way to the bathroom to wash his presence off of you although it never stays gone for long. He always comes back and everything repeats.

Ever since you and him got together you’ve slowly detached yourself from friends and family. No one knows the truth about you and Katsuki and you hope it stays that way. You can only imagine the lectures and judgement. Besides all your friends came from Bakugo anyways, if his best friends didn’t know how he was already you weren’t gonna be the one to let them find out. Even though you mostly shut yourself off from them you’d still get the occasional invite to hang out from Mina. She was always nice to you.

You mostly used school to distract yourself from the shame you felt but now it was the weekend and there was no distraction big enough to get you out of your feelings now. Well there was always one thing that made you forget, even if it is for a short amount of time. You’ve been clean for a while, Bakugo hated when you cut. In his mind you were his and by extension your body as well. Apparently he was the only one who could hurt you. Oh well all good things must come to an end. You grabbed a razor from under the sink and in no time lines of crimson covered your wrists. It was peaceful for a while up until your phone rang.

“Hello?”

”Y/N, hey girl you’ve been ignoring me.”

”M-Mina its not that I’ve just been busy with classes and everything.”

“Oh ok well then you’re definitely coming out with us tonight.”

”What no I couldn’t I have so many things to do and-“

”Y/N stop you deserve a break every once in a while you’re coming end of discussion, plus I miss you I can only put up with the boys for so long.”

”B-But-“

”Aht no buts I’ll pick you up at 8, see you later girl I love you.”

”Love you too.” You said as she hung up.

You sunk back down on the bathroom floor processing the fact that you had to actually leave the house and socialize. It seemed like forever since you sat down with the squad drinking and laughing. Oh how things change. After a while you got up deciding to find something to eat. You probably haven’t had a good meal in weeks but there’s a high chance you were gonna be drinking tonight and drunk you on an empty stomach is a bad mix. After you finished your “meal” if you could call it that you figured you better find something to wear.

You had a few hours before Mina was coming but you still had to find clothes and makeup that hide your battered body. Looking through your closet for a while you settled on a white long sleeve turtleneck, a black skater skirt, and black tights. With this unfit you wouldn’t have to use much makeup hiding marks but you still had a few to cover on your face.

”You look so pretty babe.” Mina said as you entered her car. She probably couldn't see how nervous you were

“Thanks, you too.” You said as she pulled off.

“Y/N I know you’ve been working really hard so I want you to have fun tonight ok?”

”Thanks Mina I’ll try.”

That must’ve been a good enough answer because she didn’t continue after that. After a while you arrived at the frat house. You’ve been here before to hang out with Denki, Sero and Kiri. Mina parked close and the two of you got out and headed through the front door. You were immediately hit with the smell of alcohol and b.o. it made you nauseous but you continued through the party no less. You came to a stop at the basement door.

“Were going downstairs away from all the noise, the boys are already down there.”

You just shook your head and followed her. The basement was the biggest part of the frat, it had a kitchen space and a lounge area with a couple couches that faced the tv on the wall. Walking in you noticed Kiri and Sero in the kitchen talking while Denki was on the couch with Shinsou. Luckily you didn’t see the spiky blonde anywhere and you let out a breath of relief. As you and Mina approached them they turned their attention to you.

“Y/N its good to see you its been a while no?” The red head said coming around the island to envelop you in a crushing hug. You had to force yourself not to react as he put pressure on the unknown blemishes that cover your body.

“Yea sorry about that I’ve just been busy with school lately.” You reply retracting from his hug.

”No worries Y/N I’m just glad you could make it tonight.”

”Me too.” Said Sero as he was munching on a bag of chips. He probably had the munchies considering how red his eyes were.

You went over to the makeshift bar on the counter and poured yourself and Mina a drink. As the night progressed you started to chill out more thanks to the buzz of alcohol and the contact high from Shinsou and Sero lighting up next to you.

The party was still going on upstairs but the rest of you decided to chill downstairs and watch a movie. A few minutes in and your blaster was making you regret drinking so much. You excused yourself and headed upstairs to the bathroom. You quickly did your business and washed your hands. On the way back you got turned around a little thanks to the many drinks you had.

Heading back the way you came you saw familiar blonde spikes on the couch. He didn’t see you thanks to the girl he was making out with on his lap. “You’ve gotta be fucking kidding me.” You said as tears threatened to fall. You walked up to where they were sitting and cleared your throat.

“Y/N what the fuck are you doing here?” Your boyfriend said in a weirdly calm voice not bothering to move the girl off his lap.

“That’s all you have to say, really? I just found you cheating on me and you’re asking me why I’m here?”

He stared at you for a minute not saying anything before he mumbled a “whatever” under his breath and continued with the girl as if you weren’t standing right in front of him. Tears stained your cheeks as you watched him ignore you like you didn’t matter, like you weren’t just together not even 24 hours ago.

You had to get out of there. You felt like you couldn’t breath it was like all the air was sucked from your body. You quickly but not gracefully made your way to the front door pushing it open in dire need of fresh air. You were standing on the porch heaving for a minute. You quickly texted and told Mina what happened saying you would get an Uber home.

“Hey doll what’re you doing out here all by yourself? Not having fun?”

You looked back to see a tall black haired man, but that wasn’t all. He had deep purple scars all over his face and body. Even with them he was extremely attractive.

“Hasn’t anyone ever taught you its rude to stare princess?” He said. That voice of his could’ve made you cum on the spot.

”S-Sorry I’m just not having a good night.” You replied

“Boy troubles” He said in a matter of fact tone.

“How’d you know?” You said finally meeting his gaze

”Let’s just say I’ve been watching you for a minute.”

”Well that’s not creepy at all.” You deadpanned

“Depends on how you look at it princess.” He said stepping closer to you. That pet name is gonna be the death of you.

”So why were you watching me?” You asked a little weirded out.

”If I said it was because the first moment I saw you I wondered how you would sound screaming my name how would you feel?”

‘Jesus fuck I’m actually gonna lose my mind’

The liquid courage must’ve affected your brain more than you thought because you were actually considering giving the man what he wanted.

“Sooo, what do you say princess wanna have little fun?” He said tracing his fingers along you jaw causing you to blush.

”I don’t even know your name.”

“Names Dabi princess what’s yours?”

”Y/N”

”So Y/N, what’s your answer?”

”Fuck it.” You said throwing caution to the wind.

You let Dabi take you back to his place on his motorcycle. His apartment was nice, it was filled with books something you didn’t expect from the man you just met. He only let you look around for a short minute before he was in front of you pressing you into the wall grabbing your arms above your head.

“Its time for the fun now doll, strip.” Dabi said releasing your hands and backing away from you so you could obey him. You moved to take off your shirt but before you could, you remembered why you had it on in the first place.

Noticing your hesitation Dabi came back up to you gripping your jaw so your ear was closer to his mouth.

“I said strip princess don’t make me ask again.” He whispered.

Not wanting to make the man any more angry you did as he said. You took off your turtle neck, skirt, and tights only leaving you in you f/c bra and panties. You watched as Dabi’s eyes trailed over your body, inspecting every inch of your marred skin as he did.

Feeling self conscious and ashamed you tried to shield your form with your hands but it wasn’t enough to cover the lesions that adorned your less than perfect body.

“Don’t cover yourself princess, I want to see.” Dabi said as he grabbed your arms he pulling them away so he could get better view. Your arms fell to your sides as he trailed his fingers from your neck to your collarbone and your chest. You hissed as he slightly prodded the wounds.

You were sure he heard you but he continued tracing your structure till he reached the curve of your breasts spilling out from the lace of your brassiere. If you had to guess the most flawed skin was there. Katsuki was always so rough but there seemed like his favorite place to leave marks. Now his presence was only left through the many bites, scratches, and bruises.

When you finally gained the courage to look up at the man you wished you hadn’t. His gaze was fixed on you and he looked like he was starved and you were his meal. His pupils were blown out leaving only a thin rim of cerulean, the obvious lust clouding his vision.

“D-Dabi?” You said in a whisper.

“You’re beautiful.” He said as his hands continued to nudge your soft skin.

“Ah, you’re hurting me.” You said as his grasp got tighter abusing your flesh.

He all but ignored you as he gripped your arm dragging you to his room. He pushed you on his bed, you scooted back towards the headboard as you watched him undress. He was so perfect to you like he was handcrafted by an ancient deity. Everything about him attracted you.

He finished undressing and climbs on top of you with his face inches from yours. He ripped off your bra and panties as he stared at you under him.

“I want to fuck you already.” He basically growls as his mouth connects to yours, an affirmative noise comes out in a moan and that’s all he needs. His kisses are everything but romantic, they’re a desperate, sloppy display of his dominance. His teeth grab at your your soft lips. You emit a startled noise and he swallows it as his tongue forces its way through your parted lips.

“Wait, Dabi” you gasped as he roughly bit down on your lip and you could feel him smirk against it.

“No, I’ve waited long enough.” He responds as his hands trail over your body not leaving a single inch untouched. He moved down your torso leaving a trail of kisses and hickeys till he reached your exposed core.

You cover your mouth when a moan slips out from the scarred man slipping a long digit into your wet heat.

“Aht aht, pretty girl I wanna hear how good I make you feel.” He smirks as he adds another finger pumping faster. And fuck he’s so warm inside you. His heat radiates through your core causing you to shiver.

That only encourages his ministrations as he pulls your bundle of nerves to his mouth. The contrast of his smooth and marred skin has you gasping out his name.

“That’s right princess I’m the one making you feel like this, you’re already so wet for me.”

You’d be embarrassed if you could think straight but Dabi won’t let that happen, he wants to fuck you stupid till the only thing you can think about is the way he stretches you out. You could say he was cocky but he was confident in his abilities to turn you into a whimpering mess, the only thing capable of coming out of your mouth would be his name.

He watches as your face contorts with pleasure when he finds that spongy spot inside of you. Your legs tighten around him and your hands sink into his onyx hair but his motions don’t seize. You can feel a knot forming in your stomach as he continues and he knows your close too.

“Aww doll are you gonna cum already?” He asks as his sleazy grin returns to his face. You try to answer him, you really do but the way he’s hitting that perfect spot inside you the only think you can choke out is moans. But for Dabi that wouldn’t do at all because he asked you a question and you were gonna answer him.

He removed his fingers from your core causing you to whine at the loss as you try to buck up into his touch. He slaps your pussy and you wince opening your eyes to look at him.

“I asked you a question.” He stated as he started to rub your clit in a unhurried motion.

“Y-yes Dabi fuck I’m gonna cum.” You practically screamed because what he was doing just wasn’t enough, you needed more.

“Beg me.” He said kissing your thigh. “Beg me to let you cum, and then beg for me to fuck you like the little cockslut you are.”

“Please Dabi, please- oh fuck, please let me cum.”

“That’s it such a good little whore for me, so perfect.” He groaned as he sunk his fingers back into your heat never faltering to hit your g-spot with every thrust. It felt so good. “Go on doll, cum for me.” And that’s all it took to have you shatter around him. His fingers didn’t stop as he fucked you through your orgasm an you could swear you saw white.

When he finally pulled his digits out he shoved them through your parted lips. “Suck” he instructed and so you did, letting your tongue dance around them as you tasted your own release on them causing you whine.

He removed his fingers from your mouth and then put them into his own so he could taste you too and the sight was so sinful you could’ve creamed again. You watched as he wraps his hand around his cock. It’s so pretty just like him. It’s adorned with 2 jacobs ladders on the underside, you wonder how that’s gonna feel as he fucks you.

You wouldn’t have to wait because before you know it he was positioned over top of you lining himself up with your entrance. You try to pull away when he sinks into you but he grips your hips and pulls you back into him until he’s bottomed out.

He’s so fucking big it feels like he’s gonna split you in two.

“Dabi- fuck it hurts.” You whimper as he begins to move inside you.

“Shh I know just- shit, I’m gonna make you feel real good I promise.” He says as he moves a hand from your hips to gently rub your puffy clit and continues to thrust into you but at a slower pace so you can get used to his size. You don’t know how anyone could get used to someone as big as him though.

“You’re so fucking tight doll, squeezing me so hard.” He groans as he feels you loosen up giving him more space to move.

“Look at you taking me so well, so deep.” He said as his other hand came to grip your throat. You couldn’t remember the last time you felt this good. When you were with Katsuki he made you cum but it was mostly to stroke his own ego, with Dabi it was purely for your own pleasure and it felt pretty damn amazing.

His cock dragged in and out of your gummy walls, you could feel his piercings hitting that sweet spot inside you that had you screaming out his name.

“Fuck Dabi please don’t stop, you feel so good.” You moaned.

“Yea? Say it, say I’m the only one who can make you feel this good princess.” He said as he gripped tighter on your neck and continuing to fuck into you.

“Your the only one- oh my god, you’re the only one who can make me feel this good.”

“That’s right doll I’m the only one, this pussy belongs to me now go ahead and cum all over my cock.” He said as his hips sped up relentlessly hitting your g-spot with every thrust. All it took was a few more strokes and he had you squirting all over him.

“Fuck yea you dirty little slut, squirt all over my cock.” He fucked you through your orgasm and you could tell his was coming close behind as his hips began to slow down.

“I’m gonna fill you up, yea I’m gonna fill this pretty little pussy.” He said as he was chasing his own release.

“Please Dabi please cum, its too much.” You whimpered.

He let his head fall to your neck kissing along it and your jaw as he came inside you. He collapsed on top of you as you both tried to regain your breath before he rolled off you.

“Fuck princess, I’ve never came that hard in my life.” He said as he got up to grab a warm rag to clean the both of you off with.

“Me either.” You panted as he dragged the rag between your legs carefully to avoid your sensitive clit.

When he was done he climbed into bed next to you pulling you into him. You didn’t take him as the type to get all touchy after sex but you weren’t complaining.

“You’re staying with me tonight, you can go home tomorrow.” He whispered into your hair.

Feeling too tired to argue with him you mumbled an “ok” and drifted off to sleep. Hearing your breath even out Dabi placed a kiss to your head and muttered a soft “good night princess” before going to sleep himself.

Its been a week since your encounter with Dabi. Much to your disappointment though. Ever since things “ended” with Katsuki you were hoping he’d be your distraction.

After you went home you realized the two of you didn’t exchange numbers.

‘oh well it was probably better as a one night stand anyways’ you thought.

You haven’t heard from Bakugo either, maybe things with him and his new girl were going well.

Just the thought of that makes you sick. You wonder if he treats her the same. If she has to wake up early to dedicate time to covering up all of his marks in the morning just to go to the store. If he tells her the same hateful things he told you then getting angry when you cried.

Everything he did to you.... but some part of you still wishes he would come back. You’d do anything to have it be like before when you actually thought he loved you.

Maybe he did in his own sick way. You knew he didn’t have the best upbringing. With his mom who hit him for no apparent reason and his dad who played mediator but could never really stop the violence.

It’s not surprising the cycle continued with you. But what if things were different? What if he had normal parents, then could things between you two be like in a fairytale?

That’s what most of your daydreams consist of anyway.

Today you didn’t have much to do except attend a few morning lectures. Your grades have been the only thing you could be proud of in the recent months.

Your major was psychology. Ironic right? You would think you could tell the signs of Stockholm syndrome, guess not though.

You got to your first class a little early so you chose a spot in the back. The last thing you needed today was weird eye contact with your professor.

One boring lecture later and it was time to go. You grabbed your things and headed out. Well attempted to before you bumped into someone.

“oh my god I am so sorry I wasn’t looking” you apologized grabbing your things off the floor before you were stopped with a foot on your arm.

Katsuki.

“Maybe you should be more carful then sweetheart.” he replied sarcastically.

“I’ve been looking for you, you know.” he said as you stood up. Every step you took back to create some distance he matched. Is this really what you missed?

“I thought after the party-“ he cut you off, nothing new there.

“Hah? What you thought we were done or something?” he spat.

You looked around hoping no one noticed the scene he was making. Thankfully mostly everyone had left to make their next classes.

“Katsuki I just-“ you started but were interrupted once again.

“You know Y/N I didn’t think you were that dumb.”

“You cheated Katsuki, acted as if I wasn’t standing right in front of you. What was I supposed to think?” you hissed.

In hindsight that was probably a bad idea. As soon as the words left your mouth you saw the way his eyes glazed over.

He pushed your things out of your hands again and grabbed your throat pushing you into the wall.

“You never fucking learn do you?” he whispered. “Stupid bitch, I told you you’re mine and i’ll keep proving it to you as many times as it takes.”

“Katsuki-“ you choked as he gripped tighter.

“You’re so fucking lucky I have somewhere to be, we’ll continue this later doll.”

He pushed you hard. You fell as he walked away as if nothing happened. Tears threatened to fall but you didn’t let them.

You picked up your things once again and headed to your next class.

You got home around 3pm. Today was absolutely exhausting. You set your things down and headed to shower.

The warm water felt amazing on your sore body. You took the opportunity to exfoliate, shave, wash & condition your hair, and etc...

Its been a while since you had a little self care.

You got out when you were done and threw on an oversized shirt and some underwear. You didn’t have anywhere else to be.

You used your free time to clean up your apartment a little. Organizing your room, vacuuming, dishes.

Between work and school you haven’t had time to do much of anything lately.

When you were finished you grabbed your favorite candle and lit it. The smell of ‘Cinnamon spiced vanilla’ quickly filled the space. ~

You sat crisscross on your couch, computer on your lap finishing your homework for today.

You stilled as you heard your door open and close.

Katsuki still had your key.

You set your laptop on the coffee table. Quickly getting up to greet the explosive blonde.

You walked towards the door seeing him taking off his shoes.

Normally he’s working at this time. Guess he has the day off today.

“I thought you’d be working today.” you muttered.

He just hummed. No sign of anger in his voice.

His mood swings were always hard to keep up with. He could flip at the blink of an eye.

He walked passed you heading into the kitchen. He grabbed a drink before sitting on the couch and turning the tv on.

Was he seriously ignoring you-

He wanted you to acknowledge him first. He knew you couldn’t stand being left alone. The silent treatment was punishment enough.

You walked over to him standing on the side of the couch.

“Katsu?” you said a little shaky.

He didn’t even look at you before a “hmm” left his mouth.

You thought about asking him about earlier, but you didn’t want to upset him anymore. If this was one of his good moods you sure as hell weren’t gonna ruin it.

“I was just about to cook are you hungry?” you cringed inwardly. What were you now some kind of housewife?

He finally looked at you. He watched as you nervously played with your fingers.

“Sure” he said as he turned his attention back to the screen. You walked away knowing you were dismissed.

You made his favorite spicy ramen.

You called him to eat as you were cleaning up. You heard the tv shut off with a ‘click’ as he walked in. He sat at the table and began to eat.

“You know babe a little birdy told me something very interesting.” he said between bites of food.

It was your turn to “hmm” as you continued washing the dishes.

“Someone saw you leave the party with burnt boy.” he said calmly continuing to slurp his noodles.

Your heart sank. Who saw... why would they tell him?

“I- Katsuki I was just-“ you couldn’t get the words out before he interrupted.

He still looked calm. The only thing different was a smirk now graced his lips.

“Well-“ he started before wiping his mouth.

“Was it worth it princess?” he said standing up.

What- no one was around, how did they hear that?

Fuck fuck fuck

You felt his breath on your neck as he stood behind you at the sink. He wrapped his arms around you and took the pot you were washing and set it in the soapy water.

He grabbed the towel rom the counter and gently dried your hands.

You felt like you couldn’t breathe. Why wasn’t he screaming, throwing things, hitting you?

You couldn’t process why he was acting so nonchalant. You cheated. Well he did too but that doesn’t matter.

He turned you around to face him. His hands found placement on your waist. his thumbs rubbed soothing circles on your clothed stomach.

No there was nothing soothing about this. You were looking at your feet, anything to not look in his eyes.

That was all for naught though. One hand left your waist, his thumb and index finger lifted your chin so you meet his gaze.

He didn’t look angry or upset. You could only see a tinge of sadness...?

He leaned a little to whisper in your ear.

“Was he better than me?” he asked softly.

“No Katsuki I was just upset I didn’t mean to-“

“I did” he breathed.

Your breath hitched in your throat.

“I wasn’t drunk, at the party I mean.” he started.

“I just wanted someone that wasn’t you. I’ve had better but she did the trick you know.” A tear slid down your cheek.

“Don’t get me wrong though, i’ll never let go of you. I meant it when I said you’re mine, i’m just not yours.” he said as he trailed his arm from your waist to your collar bone.

“I like hurting you Y/N. I know you’ll let me, I love when I can see how much I hurt you in your eyes.”

Tears were running down your face now. He gently wiped them away with his thumb.

“You’re so pretty when you cry you know. My pretty girl. You love me too much to be done right? Hah I bet these past few days were hell for you when you didn’t see me.”

“You’ll always let me come back won’t you? Because you’re MINE... my little whore I can fuck whenever I want... I get to do whatever I want, isn’t that right princess?”

One thing you learned about Katsuki is he doesn’t ask questions he doesn’t know the answer to.

And he was right... about all of it. You’ll let him hurt you over and over as long as he’s with you. You love him more than anything. Missed him like crazy too.

Loving Katsuki was like dousing yourself with kerosene and hoping he didn’t light a match. Hoping he loves you as much as you love him. But deep down you know he doesn’t, you’re just a toy. Something he can have whenever he wants with no objections... no rules.

He breaks you over and over and you have to be the one to fix yourself. But for him you’d do anything and he knows that... he knows and takes advantage.

“Hmm? Isn’t that right teddy bear?” he said as his fingers traced the marks he put on your skin.

“Yes Katsuki” you sniffled.

“I know baby. But I’m here now right?” he said as his thumb rubbed across your lips.

You slowly nodded.

“So why don’t you show me how sorry you are for being a little whore?”

Another ‘yes katsuki’ left your lips. He turned both of you, now his back was facing the sink and you were in front of him.

You dropped to your knees. His hand found its way to your head, still gently petting.

You looked up at him. You knew you had to look pathetic. Tears adorned your cheeks, your eyes were puffy and you were sniffing.

But still Katsuki thought you were so pretty like this. He saw the look in your eyes, even after what he said there was no hate- just love and adoration.

He loves the way you worship him. Like he’s your god. He might as well be. He’s the only one who matters to you. The only one you’ll stick by no matter what.

Every demon has their angel after all.

You unzip his pants. Rubbing over his clothed cock through his boxers. He hisses. You pull down his pants and boxers in one motion.

His hard on almost hitting your face as it comes out. You look up at him before grabbing it and pumping a few times.

Katsuki always loved eye contact.

Precum dribbles from his slit. You take your thumb and spread it over his tip causing him to groan. You place a few kisses along his shaft before you take his length into your mouth.

His hands tighten in your hair. You take him farther down your throat, gagging a little. Fresh tears prick your eyes as he bucks his hips.

“Fuckkk baby- so fucking good for me” he gasps. You move your hands down to play with his balls earning you a low growl.

A mix of saliva and precum drips down your chin. He moves his other hand to your hair gripping harder as he begins to fuck your throat.

Your hands press into his thighs but he doesn’t stop. He sets a relentless pace and all you can do is focus on breathing through your nose.

When he finally pulls out of your throat you cough and gasp trying to get air back in your lungs.

Its only a moment before he pushes his cock back down your throat, thrusting again.

“Such a perfect little slut- ah fuck” he pants. You move to play with his balls again.

It doesn’t take long before his hips stutter and he pushes your head down his length till your nose touches his pelvis.

He cums hard down your throat with a growl. “Fuck I missed your slutty little throat baby” he breathes. You know it shouldn’t but it gives you butterflies and you move a hand to your clit to feel some type of friction.

Your stopped by a smack to your cheek.

“Greedy bitch, you wanna cum?” he asks and you nod quickly.

“Bad girls don’t cum do they?” he asks gabbing your cheeks between his calloused fingers.

“Please Suki i’ll be good I promise- please please let me cum” you beg.

He doesn’t answer you though. If he doesn’t want you to cum he won’t let you. Simple.

“Bed now, I want all your clothes off” he states.

You get to your feet and move to the bedroom stumbling as you remove your clothes.

You lay on your back waiting for him. He walks in and the air leaves your lungs. You almost forgot how built he was. He always took care of himself, eating healthy and exercise really paid off.

He was built like a god. Your god.

He walked over to the bed grabbing you by the ankles and pulling you to him. You gasp as his mouth connects with yours.

The kiss is greedy, he explores your mouth leaving no room for protest. As you disconnect he bites your lip drawing blood and lapping it up like a man starved.

His fingers move down to your slit. You hear a pleasured hum as he feels how wet you are already.

“Is this all for me baby?” he whispers as he collects your arousal on his fingers and brings it to his mouth.

“Yess Katsu all for you” you breathe. You need more, need him to touch you, make you feel good.

You hips buck as his digits brush over your clit.

“Eager huh princess?”

“Katsuki please” you whine. “Please what? I don’t know what you want till you tell me.” he smirks.

“Please touch me Katsuki” you beg. He loves how easily he can make you flustered.

With no warning he pushes a finger into your tight pussy. “Fuckk” you gasp.

He curls his digit till he finds your g-spot with ease. You cry out as he adds another finger. He fucks you on his fingers till the coil in your stomach is about to snap.

“Oh fuck i’m gonna cum- ah please” you whine.

Your orgasm is so close. You almost cry when his fingers still and pull out of your heat.

“I told you, only good girls get to cum.” He says as he brings his digits to his mouth tasting your arousal.

“Please Katsu i’ll be good I promise please- please just let me cum” you say rubbing your thighs together. This earns a smack to your thigh.

“That’s not being a good girl is it baby?” he said bringing his fingers to twist your nipples.

“I’m sorry Katsuki” you whimper as he pulls on your sensitive buds.

“Not yet- but you will be I promise” he hisses. He quickly turns you over so now your face down.

He lines himself up with your tight cunt and pushes himself all the way inside.

Even after him finger fucking you it hurts as he stretches you out.

He pulls all the way out before thrusting in again setting a hard and fast pace. You grip the sheets as your mouth falls open in a silent moan.

His hand comes down on your ass hard. You cry out jerking forward. He uses his other hand to grip your hair.

“Where do you think you’re going huh princess?” he snarled.

“You were talking so much earlier what happened? Kat got your tongue?” he laughs.

Another hard smack comes down on your ass. He’s still thrusting into you hard.

“Come on and count for me pretty girl, and I might think about letting you cum” he whispers.

Smack!

“O-One”

Smack!

“Two”

Smack!

“Three”

By 20 you were sobbing. By thirty you tried to only focus on how much he was filling you up, touching all the right places without even trying. He stopped at 40.

You felt him trail his hand over your sore skin. There were no doubt gonna be bruises if they weren’t there already.

His other hand released your hair moving to your neglected clit as he pressed down. You whimpered as he massaged the bundle of nerves.

You felt the coil tighten in your stomach again.

“Come on baby” he said as he fucked into you.

“Cum for me- fuck cum all over my cock baby show me how good i’m making you feel”

Your eyes rolled back as you felt your orgasm wash over you. You clenched down on him as he fucks you through it.

“Fuck princess- keep squeezing me like that shit” he cursed as he began chasing his own high.

He sped up pulling your hips back to meet his as he rut into you. One deep thrust and he came as he attached his teeth to your neck. You whimpered as you felt him detach his teeth and lap up the blood with his tongue.

He pulled out and you winced at the feeling of not being full.

He chuckled as he say your needy hole clamp down on nothing. Dropping down on the bed next to you he pulled you by the waist so you cuddled on his chest.

“I’m sorry Katsuki” you whispered as snuggled your face into his neck.

“I know you are baby” he said as you fell asleep.

You woke in an empty bed. You’d been asleep for a while, he must’ve really worn you out. You winced as you tried to sit up.

You wouldn’t be sitting right for a while.

After finally making it out of bed you got ready for the day. You didn’t have any classes but you did have to go to work.

You work at a small cafe close to the school’s campus. It’s mostly empty besides the few students who come in to get a caffeine fix and leave.

You make a decent wage though. It’s enough to pay bills at least.

Katsuki never liked you working there. He said he didn’t like when you were out at all. People could stare at what’s his, and he wouldn’t let anyone else have you.

You tried to tell him he had nothing to worry about but he didn’t listen, like always.

He would come by to check on you sometimes while you were working. If he saw you so much as smile at someone besides him you knew you’d have more marks to cover up.

Didn’t he get that conversation was basically your job besides making lattes and dealing with karens.

Somehow it was always your fault.

‘People can see how much of a slut you are you know, all they want is to use you like some whore’

That’s what he said when he saw a guy give you his number. It’s surprising how you haven’t been fired after all the arguments between you and Katsuki in the staff room.

Your boss was always nice about it though. She’d always comfort you when Katsuki inevitably stormed off leaving you crying alone.

She’s probably the only one who has an idea of your relationship. She’s hinted at trying to get you to leave him but you’ve always brushed her off.

After all she’s been divorced twice, what does she know?

You clocked in at 8am and started working for the day. Your coworkers were already there as you came in. You worked with two other girls, Sarah and Rui.

Your shift was 8am-4pm.

You ground the coffee beans that are to be used today and make the pastries to sit in the warming rack while the other girls made sure the sitting area was clean for customers.

All the monotonous labor helped keep your mind off things. At work you didn’t think about anything but that.

The door opens with a ‘ding’ and you look up to greet a few customers, taking their orders and asking them to wait a moment before you went to complete it.

A few hours and about a hundred iced coffee’s later the store was empty. It had been unusually busy for a Thursday.

Your ass was killing you but you popped a few ibuprofen and tried to ignore it.

You and Rui took the time to clean up a little. It was the end of her shift so Sarah had clocked out.

You swept while Rui did the dishes. The mood was calm as subtle music played in the background.

You had roughly a half hour before your shift ended. Your feet were killing you but that was nothing new.

You finished sweeping and went into the back closet to put away the broom hearing the door ‘ding’ as you went. You figured Rui could handle it so you weren’t in a rush to head back up front.

You grabbed the mop and some cleaner before hearing Rui call your name.

You set the supplies down and went to check and see what she wanted.

She stopped you before you could see who was at the counter.

“So there’s a really hot guy asking for you”

“Me??”

“Uhh yea and it’s not the one who’s in here all the time”

“Umm ok i’ll go see, in the meantime will you get the mop and stuff ready so we can close?”

“Yea of course” she said walking past you

Well fuck here goes nothing. You straightened out your uniform before waking out to meet cerulean eyes at the counter.

Dabi.

How did he even know where you worked? There’s no way you told him at the party, or at his house.

“Hey princess, long time no see huh?” his voice knocked you out of your thoughts sending shivers down your spine.

“Umm yeah it’s been a minute, how’d you know where I work?”

“I’ve been here before when you were working, am I that forgettable doll?”

“I serve alot of people a day but you think i’d remember you” you say teasingly.

“I would hope so princess”

“So can I get you something? A coffee, pastry?”

“How about, you?” he smirked.

Your eyes widened and you choked a little. What are you supposed to say? ‘Hey my boyfriend found out about us’

He’ll think you’re crazy for taking him back. Not that you really broke up or are technically together. More like you’re his property and he doesn’t share.

“I don’t really think that’s a good idea, umm Katsuki found out and he’s upset” you mutter.

“You mean the dick who was sucking faces with that girl at the party?”

You stare at your feet trying to avoid his gaze.

“Look me and Katsuki have been together a long time and i’m not just gonna give that up I’m sorry”

“Fine princess have it your way, but when blondie gets too rough again i’ll be waiting for you” he said as he slid a small piece of paper across the counter and walking out.

His number.

You really shouldn’t keep it, you know what’ll happen if Katsuki finds his name in your phone. You do it anyways though.

You type his name and number in your contacts before going to clock out.

You waved goodbye to Rui before you headed home.

You quickly showered and threw your clothes in the hamper.

You checked your phone seeing a text from Mina.

MINA💞: Movie night at my place, come please??

YOU: Who’s coming?

MINA💞: Just the squad we’d love for you to come, we’ve missed you.

YOU: Time?

MINA💞: 8 and we’re having a sleepover like the old times.

YOU: I’ll be there but I can’t promise i’ll stay the night, I have things to do.

MINA💞: Just decide when you’re here. I can’t wait to see you❤️

YOU: Mina it’s only been like 2 weeks since we saw each other.

MINA💞: That’s still a long time babes😔

YOU: I guess. I’ll text you when i’m on my way.

MINA💞: It’s gonna be so much fun!!!

You liked her message and tossed your phone. Great what were you gonna wear?

You raided your closet looking for something cute and simple that covered the marks Katsuki made the night before.

The worst part was from the spankings but you had a few ‘love bites’ across your neck and collarbone.

You picked out a red sweater with black leggings to go with your black boots.

You could hide the marks that weren’t covered with makeup.

You had a while till you had to go so you threw on some sweats to go run some errands.

You walked to the grocery store picking up a few things for your apartment and movie night.

You hoped Sero would come, some weed would totally help with the pain you felt. You hoped no one could tell you were wincing with every step.

You got home and put away your groceries. It was about 7 so you went to get ready.

You changed into your outfit, put on makeup and perfume and it was finally time to go.

You typed a quick text to Mina letting her know you were on your way. You made sure you had everything before walking out and locking your door.

~ You felt like someone was following you but you were probably just paranoid.

You arrived at Minas’ a little after 8 and knocked.

The door flew open and the dark skinned girl brought you into a crushing hug.

“Mina I kinda need to breathe” you gasped for air as she finally let go.

She muttered an apology but you knew she wasn’t really sorry. She took the bag of items from your hand and you followed her into her apartment.

You’ve always loved her place. It was a loft with big floor to ceiling windows that looked out over the city.

She decorated with mostly light pinks and grays. The boys would always joke about how ‘a fairy threw up’ in her apartment thanks to all her crystals and stuff.

She quickly put all of the things down in the kitchen before grabbing your hand and dragging you to the living room with everyone else.

Kiri and Denki were playing cards while Sero sat behind them on the couch.

They looked up at you, all saying a series of ‘hey’ and ‘it’s nice to see you’

God you really had to get out more.

You and Mina sat on the couch and started talking for a bit.

“Is Katsuki coming?” you asked.

“Yeah he’ll be here later when he gets off work, didn’t he tell you?”

“Umm yeah I just forgot” you lied. If she noticed she didn’t say anything before she continued talking.

The movie you were all gonna watch was some action/sci fi film the boys picked out. Needless to say you and Mina were outvoted.

The movie was about half way finished. Denki had one too many drinks and was passed out on one of Minas bean bags.

Mina was cuddled up on Kiri, looking like she was gonna be out any minute.

You looked over to Sero on the other side of the couch and he was rolling a decent sized blunt. Thank goodness.

“Mind if I hit that when you’re done Sero?” you asked.

“Y/N I didn’t know you smoked” said Kiri looking at you.

“I don’t really but theres a first time for everything” you stated.

“Sure mami I don’t mind” said Sero as he continued to roll.

When he was done he lit it and took a few hits before handing it over to you.

You hit it and coughed. You heard the boys chuckle and you rolled your eyes.

You took a few more hits managing not to cough this time before handing it off to Kiri.

You felt relaxed as your high hit you. Well until you heard the door open.

Katsuki walked in and his eyes flickered to you. His face changed. He wasn’t expecting you to be here.

The others didn’t notice the tense aura in the room and greeted the blonde. He walked into the kitchen grabbing a beer before coming and plopping down next to you on the couch.

He didn’t say anything to you, choosing to engage in conversation with the boys instead.

Your attention was stuck on the bad movie playing but you could feel every time his gaze turned to you.

A while later and Kiri had took Mina back to her room and fell asleep and Sero took Denki and put him in the guest bedroom they were sharing.

When sleeping over Mina always put you and Bakugo and Sero and Denki in the extra rooms so you didn’t have to sleep on the couch or floor.

Katsuki stood up from next to you and grabbed your arm pulling you with him towards your room.

He shoved you on the bed before grabbing your jaw hard examining your face.

“You’re high?”

“Just a little” you managed to choke out between his death grip on your face.

“Who told you to smoke?”

“Katsuki I’m a grown woman no one told me to do anything, I wanted to” you said as you tried to pull his hands off you.

“Oh, is that right? You’re a big girl huh you just get to do whatever you want?” he spat.

“That’s not what I meant, I just wanted to relax, I’m not even that high I just took a few hits”

“Doesn’t matter Y/N, you know better”

He didn’t like it when you drank or did anything to have fun. He’s the only one who gets to.

He pushes you back on the bed hard before moving to take his shirt off.

“Oh well guess i’ll just have to punish you huh?” he smirked.

Before you could object his mouth was on yours making you gasp. He took that as an opportunity to use his tongue.

The kiss was rough and hungry. He pulled away from your mouth moving to your neck as he left kisses and bites.

You cried out as be bit down hard on your pulse point drawing blood.

He sat up and basically ripped you out of your clothes till you were naked before him.

He pushed you up with your back against the headboard and moved between your legs. He put them over his shoulders as he kissed and sucked on them.

He trailed a finger to your slit and chuckled when he found you soaking for him. He covered his digit in your wetness before moving to rub your clit.

Your hands gripped his hair as you felt his tongue replace his finger. He stopped his ministrations as he took off his belt and grabbed both your hands.

He bound your hands together behind your back and went to continue where he left off. Your hips bucked as you felt his hot muscle touch your bundle of nerves causing him to grip your thighs tight and he continued to eat you out.

“Katsuki- fuck fuck fuck i’m gonna cum ah please” you whined as you tried to writhe your hips but it was no use, his grip on you only tightened.

He added a finger inside you as he sped up. Your orgasm washed over you as he hit that spongy spot inside you. You came hard on his fingers and his tongue lapped it up before adding another digit into your heat.

“No Katsuki ‘s too much-“ you whined but a harsh smack to your clit interrupted you.

“Don’t care, you’re gonna sit back like a good little bitch and take it” he said and continued.

“please- fuck” you gasped as you felt another coil build up inside you.

“Come on pretty girl I know you got another one for me the way you’re squeezing down on my fingers, go on be a good girl and cum” he smirked as he watched your eyes roll back as you came hard again.

Tears began to fall as he continued to overstim you. No matter how hard you cried or begged he didn’t stop.

“Aww what’s the matter, the little whore can’t take it?”

You couldn’t even answer him only little whimpers and ‘mmms’ left your mouth.

After cumming 5 more times he kept going. You were sweating and could barely keep your eyes open.

He was still going, using his thick fingers to hit your g-spot repeatedly while his tongue was still working on your clit. A loud whimper left you as you squirted on his fingers.

“Fuck- you dirty little slut” he says as he laps up the wetness. He coats his fingers in your cum before pushing them in your mouth.

“Don’t you taste good babe?” he smirks.

You’re too tired to protest as he takes out his painfully erect cock and lines it up with your wet entrance.

He pushes inside you with a groan and his mouth comes down to latch on one of your boobs while his fingers tweak with the other.

He thrusts into you fast and deep filling you up without trying. He bites and sucks your soft mounds, no doubt leaving marks for you to find tomorrow.

“You feel so good- fuck squeezing me so tight” he groans

“Your pussy was made for me no one else ah fuck so wet for me baby- so fucking soft”

All you can do is moan as he flips you on your stomach, your hands are still bound behind you as he arches your back to meet his hips. He pushes into you again hitting even deeper with this new position.

“‘Suki n-no more i- fuck I can’t anymore please” you beg as the pain and the pleasure overwhelm you.

“Just a little longer baby- mmm you’re being such a good girl don’t you wanna make daddy feel good too?”

You nod a little as he continues to fuck you hard. His hands are on your ass rubbing over the marks he made.

One hand grips in your hair pulling your back to his chest. You cum again. You feel him slow down and he thrusts into you deep before coming with a ‘fuck’

He holds you to him tight till he finishes and sets you down gently as he pulls out. You must’ve blacked out because when you open your eyes you between his legs in the guest tub and he’s washing you. He’s careful to avoid the sensitive spot between your legs.

His mouth leaves kisses over the bite marks on your neck.

“You did so good for me” he whispers as you fall back asleep.

You wake up again to him shaking you a little as he sits behind you holding out a water bottle.

“Drink some and you can go back to sleep” he says gruffly at you trying to close your eyes.

He helps you take a few sips before putting it up and laying down with you.

He pulls you into his chest and whispers a soft ‘mine’ before falling asleep.

You and Katsuki left early the next morning choosing to avoid your group of friends.

They’d notice the marks you couldn’t manage to cover up or how you’d wince with every step you took.

So you just avoided them all together.

Katsuki had a class and you had work so you both went your separate ways for the day. Promises to be good while he was gone left your lips while threats of what would happen if you didn’t left his.

You got home with a little time to spare before you had to leave. You were grateful that you could take the time to shower and freshen up.

Sighing you walked into your workplace. Today was going to be a long day you could feel it.

You clocked in and got everything ready to open. It was just you and Rui today so you divided up the work amongst yourselves.

You took the front while she took the back. You’d be greeting customers and taking orders while she completed them.

It was a slow day so you didn’t have to do much. You sighed as you saw a man with familiar onyx hair walk through the door.

“Hey doll, miss me?” he cooed, resting his arm on the counter.

Before you could answer the door dinged again and your heart dropped.

Katsuki walked through the door, vermilion eyes fixed on you as he walked up to the counter next to Dabi.

“Umm can I get either if you something?” you choked out trying to gage the moods in the room.

It was Katsuki who spoke first. “Didn’t know you served the homeless in here babe” he sneered looking at Dabi.

“Oh I have a house, Y/N didn’t tell you?” he deadpanned tilting his head at you.

“Okay I think that’s enough” you said trying to stop a bad situation from becoming worse.

“I didn’t know those words were in your vocabulary doll, all I remember is ‘don’t stop please’.” He smirked as your cheeks grew hot.

“The fuck did you just say burnt boy?” Katsuki growled.

This was not gonna end well.

“Oh have I struck a nerve prettyboy? I sure hope you’ve learned how to keep your temper in check.”

“Y/N get your shit we’re leaving.” Katsuki demanded before walking towards the door.

“What? I still have half my shift left I can’t just leave.” You stated.

“Not anymore. Be outside in 10mins or so help me god you’ll regret it.” he said before walking out.

Rui came out from the back at the sound of the door slamming.

“Is everything okay out here?” she said glaring at Dabi.

“Umm yeah everything’s fine Rui” you said.

She looked back and forth between you and Dabi before muttering an ‘ok’ and heading to the back.

“So doll, aren’t you gonna listen to your ‘boyfriend’?” he asked as he fiddles with a stirring straw.

“No I can’t, I mean I can’t lose this job he’ll just have to get over it.” you said

“Good for you and remember you always have my number if you need anything, yeah?” he asked.

“Yeah um thanks” you said as you watched him turn and walk out.

You took a deep breath trying to calm down. Your phone vibrated in your pocket and you pulled it out.

It was Katsuki.

Katsu:

That’s how you wanna be? Don’t say I didn’t warn you Y/N

It was probably a bad idea to leave him on read but you couldn’t deal with him right now. So many things were happening inside your head.

You couldn’t stop thinking about Dabi. He was so calm against Katsuki.

You decided to text him.

You:

Hey this is Y/N I just wanted you to have my number.

Dabi:

Thanks doll ;)

You smiled at his text before putting your phone away and going back to work.

It was the end of your shift and you could not wait to get home. You clocked out and locked up before heading back. You jumped as you felt a hand on your shoulder.

“Sorry doll I didn’t mean to scare you”

“Dabi what the fuck are you doing here?”

“Well if you answered your messages you’d know i’m here to walk you home” he smiled intertwining his hand with yours.

“Sorry today’s been an off day but you really don’t have to I don’t want to take up your time” you said softly.

“I know I don’t have to babe but I want to, plus I wanted to make sure you were ok and everything you seemed pretty upset earlier” he stated swinging your entwined hands.

“Oh- umm yeah i’m fine I can deal with Katsuki” you said.

“Yeah but you shouldn’t have to. He doesn’t respect you and he’s pathetic” you nod.

Dabi walked you the rest of the way home and you invited him in for a drink to say thank you.

One drink turned into two and two turned into three and before you knew it you were in bed with his face between your thighs.

“Fuck... right there Dabi please” you moaned as his tongue lapped at your sensitive bundle of nerves.

“Fuck baby you taste so good, you gonna cum for me? Come on baby cum in my mouth.” Your back arched as your orgasm washed over you.

“Fuck... fuck” you whispered as Dabi came to lay on top of you kissing your neck.

“My good girl” he whispered nuzzling into your chest.

“What about you?” you asked catching your breath.

“Don’t worry about me doll, as long as I made you feel good.” You smiled and kissed his forehead as he fell asleep on you.

You played with his hair for a while before you drifted off along with him.

The next day you woke up and made the both of you breaking and coffee. The domesticated feel of it all was actually really nice. It was good to be able to enjoy a morning without being on edge for once.

The two of you talked and caught up. You didn’t think about Katsuki once. Well until you were on the couch and Dabi was laying with his head on your lap.

You checked your phone and you saw Katsuki’s instagram. He had went to a party and someone posted an off guard pic of him and two girls #’d the man.

You shouldn’t be angry but you were. The time it was posted was before you even got off work. He got upset and decided to cheat on you.

You felt less guilty about what you did with Dabi now. Things with him seemed right and you weren’t gonna question why Katsuki did what he did.

You were finally happy. So much so you didn’t notice Dabi texting his friends.

Dabi’s POV

Jessi & Lisa:

Did she see it?

Dabi:

Yea thanks I owe you two big time

Jessi & Lisa:

Don’t worry about it, the blonde was fun ;)

#mha x reader #minors dni #possessive #mean katsuki #yandere bakugo x reader

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hcm92literature · 1 year

Text

‘Out Of Character’ 10th December 2022

‘Out Of Character’ master page

Read on AO3

Author’s notes: apologies for this being posted a few days late, i’ve had a really crap few weeks and haven’t had the time/energy for this stuff, and this might affect the final two chapters as i still haven’t finished writing them… but hopefully i can get them both done before the end of the year!

“Adrien!”

He had known it was coming. But that didn’t mean he was prepared for it. Adrien turned to see Marinette weaving her way through her friends to get to him. Adopting what he hoped was a suitably surprised expression, he attempted to calm his breathing and moved towards her. “Marinette?”

“I, uh…” She looked flustered. She also looked goddamned gorgeous. The theme of Alya and Nino’s Christmas party was ugly sweaters, but Marinette was the complete opposite of ugly in hers. It was obviously handmade by her; strawberry milk pink with white snowmen and snowflakes. But she’d tied her hair in a neat bun at the top of her head, wore sparkly snowflake earrings, and had done her makeup to match the pink of her sweater. Adrien could feel his heart threatening to escape his green and white Agreste brand sweater, whose patterns were calculated enough to be deemed ugly.

Marinette blushed to match her sweater and glanced up at him and then away sheepishly. “Can we move over here? Where it’s a little quieter?” Adrien nodded and followed her to the corner of the living room where the white and gold decorated Christmas tree was situated. It wasn’t much quieter sound-wise as the music filled the entire apartment, but there wasn’t anyone else standing nearby. He looked down at her as she fidgeted, apparently trying to look everywhere but his face. “Well… first of all, Merry Christmas.”

Adrien couldn’t help the small smile that played on his lips despite his nerves. “Merry Christmas, Nettie.”

She looked at him properly then, a suspicious expression threatening to spread across her face, and his heart rate continued to increase at his slip up of using her nickname as Adrien. Marinette then took a deep breath. “Adrien, I… I think I owe you an apology.” She frowned. “No, I do owe you an apology. Walking out on that D&D session a couple weeks ago was rude and out of line. I should have voiced my discomfort instead of punishing you for it. And Marc. I already apologised to them over text but… Well, I felt like my apology to you should be in person. And not just because I don’t have your number.” She laughed nervously.

“Was that you asking for my number?”

Marinette’s eyes shot to his and he silently cursed himself. Why did he say that? Even if she did want his number, he couldn't give it to her - she already had it saved in her phone as Chat Noir’s number! He put a hand to the back of his head and laughed probably a little too loud. “Just kidding! I, uh, my phone’s run out of battery and I don’t remember my number anyway!”

She raised an eyebrow at him then glanced away with an unreadable look on her face. “Um, okay… Anyway, I just wanted to, I guess, have a talk with you about that game. And about…” When she looked back at him, her expression was pained, making Adrien flinch. “Uh, Plagg’s confession.” Something about the way she said his character’s name made him think she knew it wasn’t just Plagg confessing to Tikki.

“W-what is there to talk about?” Adrien shuffled from foot to foot uncomfortably.

“Well, it felt- to me at least, it felt like it came out of nowhere. This whole year I was under the impression that Plagg hated Tikki-”

“Because he didn’t say much to her and acted aloof?”

Her eyebrows went up slightly. “Yes. And when he did speak to her, he always seemed standoffish.”

“That’s because he was nervous… Tikki was so bright and friendly and caring, and Plagg was enamoured with her from the moment they met. But he could never seem to find the right words to speak to her, no matter the subject. So he just didn’t say much at all…”

Marinette’s face betrayed some of her thoughts as surprise and suspicion settled over it. She opened and closed her mouth a few times before clearing her throat and actually speaking. “Adrien, are you-”

“Hey, you guys are under the mistletoe!”

The pair turned to stare at Alix in shock. She had sidled up next to Marinette, precariously holding a drink and pointing above them with the biggest lopsided grin on her face. She must have been drunk. Adrien and Marinette looked above their heads to see that there was indeed a large sprig of mistletoe hanging off the tree between them. It was sneaky, as the white berries matched the other white decorations surrounding it, so it wasn’t really visible at first glance.

Adrien looked back down at Marinette, desperately trying to keep his breathing steady, but she was still staring at the foliage, again with an unreadable expression. He cleared his throat and took a half-step away from her. “We don’t have to-”

Alix suddenly scooted behind him and shoved him more than the half-step back towards Marinette, much to her shock. “Oh, yes you do! It’s tradition! Alya made me kiss Kim under the mistletoe earlier, so there’s no way I’m letting you guys get out of it!” She then moved back to Marinette’s side and jabbed a finger in her ribs, eliciting a pained exclamation. “And it has to be for five seconds at least. You can’t get away with just a peck with me around!”

Panic settled over Adrien. Marinette obviously didn’t want this and he wasn’t going to do it unless she said otherwise. But Alix was being difficult. What could he say to stop her from-

“Alright, fine.”

“I’m sorry?” Adrien blinked down at Marinette in shock. What did she just say?

When she looked up at him, he was almost more panicked by her expression. She looked like she was calculating something, but there was also something softer behind her eyes that was sparking some kind of hope in him that he barely dared to think about. She gave him a small smile and shrugged. “It’s tradition, right?”

Adrien felt that his heart might actually explode with how hard and fast it was pumping. Marinette closed the gap between them and put her hands on his chest. Surely she must be able to feel how nervous he was… Her expression took on a surprised edge, but the softness was the predominant look in her eyes now as she looked up at him through her eyelashes. She then closed them and began leaning up. Adrien took a breath and leaned down. Then their lips met.

One second.

Marinette’s lips were so soft and tasted of mulled wine.

Two seconds.

Adrien began moving his own without thinking.

Three seconds.

Was she responding? He could barely believe it.

Four seconds.

Adrien found his hands moving of their own accord, one wrapping around her waist and the other cupping her face.

Five seconds.

They should be pulling apart now, right?

Six seconds.

One of her hands snaked its way up to his hair and fingers became entangled in it, just as they had a couple weeks ago. Only this time his hair wasn’t wet and her fingers ran through it with ease, sending jolts of electricity down his spine.

Seven seconds.

Alix laughed loudly and the pair leapt apart, both breathing heavily. She grinned as they glared at her, and gave them a thumbs up. “Well, that was definitely more than five seconds and you clearly enjoyed it! You can thank me lateeer.” She winked and blew them a kiss then laughed her way over to where Alya and Nino were stood gawking with their mouths open.

Adrien turned back to Marinette and rubbed the back of his head where her hand had just been. “I, um-”

“I think I need another drink.” Her voice was high-pitched and strangled, and he couldn’t read her expression as she turned to walk away, but her face was bright red, much deeper than the pink of her sweater.

“O-okay…” Adrien stayed rooted to the ground next to the tree, but stared after her in confusion. What the heck just happened?

#hcm92literature #miraculous ladybug #'out of character'#fanfic #au #Marinette Dupain-Cheng #Adrien Agreste #adrinette

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heyitssashag · 1 year

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Every time I check the news, someone else has passed away. Today was David Crosby. He had a pretty extensive career spanning nearly 60 years. I grew up listening to Crosby, Stills, Nash & Young. Our House was probably my favourite song by the group but they put out a lot of great tunes. ☺️

Today, Ella went to school and I went for lunch by myself. Actually, it was breakfast. Two eggs, pancakes and bacon. I could barely get through half of it. This is when I really miss Ella joining me because she can finish my food… or at least, my bacon. lol. At the restaurant, they had the station LG73 on. It wasn’t the original station that I listened to on my ghettoblaster every morning before I went to school as a kid. I remember hearing the “morning zoo” come on and would be excited when they’d put out a new song parody. As an 11 year old, I thought they were funny and entertaining.

After I ate, I went to the art store, snooped around and chatted with the staff. Picked up some great drawing pencils that I’m looking forward to using. Then, I went grocery shopping. I had my rolling cart with me and when I was done, I think it weighed about 500 pounds. Took it on the bus and rolled it home. Up and down the big hills. I had another bag I was balancing on top of it, too. Surprisingly, I was tired but not completely wiped out afterwards. Additionally, I’m not as sore as I usually am. I think, perhaps, the Zometa (bone strengthener) may be finally working.

My face always looks blotchy when I’m outside or exercising or both. I should wear makeup more. I should also stop picking on myself and instead, give myself some high-fives for doing what I do.

This past week, everywhere I go I hear the song, “Hey Jude”. I have a friend who’s a big Beatles fan too and that’s his favourite song. So of course, whenever I hear it, I think of him. Maybe I should give him a call. 🤔 hmm. lol. It sounds a bit “woo-woo” but I try to pick up on “signs”. I’m not sure if it’s from the universe or God or spirits or family that have passed on or it’s just energy molecules. I’ve had way too many strange coincidences happen in my life to just pass them off as nothing. There was an episode of The Good Place - a show that is supposed to be set in the afterlife and goes into the ethics of human behaviour (and if you haven’t seen it, you should - it’s awesome), where Eleanor tells Michael she discovered his “sign” (I can’t remember if that was the word she used but it’s something along those lines) but Michael apparently left her like 4000+ “signs”. 😂 Anyway, my point is that I think we are given these “nudges” on a regular basis and we can choose to see them or not. So when I hear a 50+ year old song played repeatedly, I look for the meaning of why I’m hearing it.

I have a few more examples because… of course I do. 😆 Any excuse to ramble on further gives me mini explosions of joy in my prefrontal cortex. Yep, anyway, after I had my radiation (back in the summer of 2021), I went for a lot of walks in the local trails. This is when I also prayed - after my prayers, I kept seeing bears. I lived in that area for over a decade and never saw so many bears over a summer. Sometimes, I run into the same friend/acquaintance multiple times (when I otherwise almost never see them), or I spot the same sequence of numbers, or I may just have sudden deja vu or a vivid dream. I consider all of these possible “signs” that are directing me to a different path or just sending me a message that I’m on the right path. Honestly, I don’t really know and I feel like I’m “talking out my ass” right now. 😅 I’m suddenly realizing how flaky I sound but hey, ya never know. There may be something to it. So I’ll just continue to keep an eye out for those “signs”. Great, now I have that dumb song stuck in my head …and it’s the Tesla version which sucks even more than the original. 🤣

Anyway, those are my thoughts and happenings for today. Nothing exciting. Tomorrow, I have to go see the lung doctor downtown. Will be a long day. My parents have contractors arriving at 8am so I have to be up extra early, too. So, I’m going to get back to my book and make myself a cup of tea… as usual, here’s your random gif. ⬇️

#metastatic breast cancer #breast cancer #signs #wellness #blogging on my blog #blogging #my musings #my weird thoughts #things i think about #writing #Spotify

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lord-vaders · 3 years

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#anyway I haven’t done makeup in what feels like weeks so I went all out with dark plum smoky eye for this small Tuesday evening party #not pictured is a bullshit discussion post I’m trying to power through before I leave the house #abt jessica

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rommahh · 3 years

Text

{Harry in sparkly black….Harry lemme **** *** *** for free}

You hadn’t talked to Harry all day. Not that you were mad at him or anything but your therapy this morning left you feeling a little spacey. There was something about talking about your emotions that left you feeling emotionally drained.

You missed Harry terribly and though it’s only been a short week, you felt very lonely. But on another note, your anxiety wasn’t as bad as it was. You were starting to feel like your normal self again but missing something.

You loved the tight knit life you have with Harry. You like being around him most hours of the day. You two were inseparable. If you were in the shower, he was in the bathroom reading a book from the lounger chair in the corner. If he was writing music on the beach, you were somewhere on the shore collecting shells. If you were going to the grocery store the least he could do was go for the drive with you. You two were close and it was something the both of you were ok with.

Some couples don’t like being so close but it worked for you and Harry. Being away from Harry was a weird experience. It’s only been a week but you feel like it’s been a lifetime. You haven’t minded being on your own but you wanted to be with the person you felt most connected to.

So being you, you purchased a ticket to Chicago. You didn’t know how Harry was going to react but you could only assume it would be a positive reaction. You told Jeff that you were coming so he could get you a hotel key and backstage pass.

As you sat in the airport you felt your back pocket buzz- your music pausing for the call. Your hand slipped into the pocket roughly pulling out the small phone. Harry’s icon, him in a fluffy robe looking as grumpy as ever, met your eyes. You cursed because you were quite obviously in the airport and if he saw you, the surprise would be ruined.

You answered anyways but only for audio. You made sure that your airpods were snug in you ear and there was no chance of them falling out.

“My lover!” Harry greets you a in sing song voice. You could hear his humph as he recognizes that you didn’t answer with the FaceTime video on. “Turn your camera on.”

“Can’t, I’m not feeling good.” You fib nervously. Harry frowned, nervous that he may have done something to upset you.

“Oh, alright. What’s wrong then?” He asks. You chew your lip trying to think of an answer.

“Uh, period.” You stammer.

“Your period doesn’t start for another few day…saw it on the tracker.” Harry may have your period tracker on his phone but it was because he wanted to make sure he was able to comfort you the best way he could when he needed to.

“Must be the meds-“ The sound of your boarding attendant sounded over your head cutting you off. “Hey bubs, I’ve actually got to go but we can’t chat later.”

“Sure, that’s fine I guess. Love you.” He mumbles, confused by the phone call. You hang up leaving Harry a little lost in his thoughts.

Later, Harry sang through his rehearsal carelessly, his head clouded with thoughts. He even sang through TBSL and though he was in the worst of moods, fans waiting at the venue thought he never sounded better.

You on the other hand had just sat through the worst flight of your life. There was a woman in the flight who didn’t want to wear her mask causing commotion before the flight could even take off. You had the worst headache halfway through the flight and because of the lack on supplies, the flight couldn’t give you any ginger ale or accommodations.

You didn’t let any of it get to you though as you directed for the chauffeur Jeff sent for you to go to the venue for show.

Harry sat in the common room backstage with the band and Jeff eating dinner grumpily. His fork was stabbing every little piece of lettuce of his salad, everyone watched worried that he may break his bowl.

“HS3 is trending on Twitter today, pretty exciting.” Jeff says to Harry breaking the silence. Jeff just received a text from you saying that you arrived to the venue and were walking towards Harry’s dressing room.

“Mmm great.” Harry grumbles. Jeff rolled his eyes at the diva.

“Someone’s a little pissy this evening. How about you go fix that mood before you greet your fans with a bad attitude.” Jeff scolds him like a child who just got caught doing something they shouldn’t have. Jeff really didn’t care about Harry’s attitude, used to the moods at this point, but he needed a way for Harry to leave the room and see you in the dressing room.

“Fine, didn’t want to be around anyways.” Harry shrugs.

Back in Harry’s dressing room, you rolled your suitcase into a corner where Harry’s outfit for the night resided on a hanger. You smiled at the sparkly black top that you helped pick out. You walked around his dressing room from the hair and makeup table, past the bathroom/ dressing area, and back around to the couch’s and coffee table where you took a seat. You snagged one of his green juices needing the boost of energy from being on the flight.

You heard the door knob jiggle but stayed planted in you seat sipping on the juice. You never made a peep as Harry barged through the room, scowl covering his face. He stormed past the couch not batting an eye at you. He went to the mini fridge where his juices were before letting an exasperated sigh.

“Who fucking took my juice?” He whines. You quietly giggle in your hand at his tone.

“Im sorry, thought I could have it.” You chuckle. Harry leaps from where he stands letting out a yell. He turns to look at you with wide eyes, hand over his chest as if his heart was going to explode from his chest. You stood from the couch waiting for him to react more but he just stood there in shock. When the realization of you actually being there kicked in he let out another yell before bounding over to you.

Before you knew it, you had two strong arms wrapped tightly around you. Your wrapped around his neck, hands and fingers spread through his hair. His face tucked into your lower neck peppering desperate kisses all over just to feel something.

“What are you doing here?” You hear him cry. You pulled away from him to wipe his eyes of the tears that streamed down his face.

“I needed to see you.” Was all you could muster. He pulled you down on the couch, your body cushioning his larger frame. He laid in between your legs, your back flat in the body of the couch.

“Im so happy your here.” Harry couldn’t even put his excitement into words. He knew you were coming in a week but to have you here earlier than that made him feel things. He sat up from suffocating you into the couch, allowing for you to sit up beside him. “What about your therapy? I hope you’re not jeopardizing your mental health to be here with me cause I would much prefer if you put me on the back burner and took care of yourself.”

You rolled your eyes playfully. “I’m ok. I still will see my therapist virtually, I’ve got all new meds that are working fine, and if all goes to shit I will go back home. It’s ok bubs.” You reassure him.

He grabs your face with both hands pulling your face to his. Your lips meet with need. His lips slotting with yours, moving slowly but with rigor as if he was scared you would slip from his fingers. Your bottom lips fit between his lips leaving for him to suck on it slightly. You moaned at the feeling making Harry pull you in tighter. You sat slightly upon his lap, chest against each other tightly. Your tongues pushed at one another, lips loving in tangent.

You pulled away when you felt his lower presence awaken. He whined at the loss of contact making you giggle.

“If we go any further you’re gonna be late for your show. I’ll give you more back at the hotel, yeah?” You say lowly trying to catch your breathe. He groaned resting his forehead on yours chasing your lips with chaste kisses making you smile.

“Fine, you owe my though. This is level three apology situation that can only be resolved with these things; sloppy blowies, butt stuff, or face masks if you catch my drift.” He chastised. You let out a deep belly laugh pushing yourself away from him. You two still sit facing each other, your legs slightly on top of his.

“You’re so nasty, but I may be able to arrange one of those.” You wink making Harry let out a triumphant laugh.

“Are you staying for the show? I understand if your not.” He questions fiddling with your fingers.

“Think it would be best if I didn’t. I’m really tired and I obviously need a nap if I’m going to be up for your post show antics.” You joke giving his nose a poke. He jokingly pretends to bite your finger in retaliation.

Harry went on stage that night happier than ever. He started plotting proposals from the second he walked you to the car with your suitcase and waved goodbye to you. You went to the hotel room and “accidentally” fell asleep wearing one of your most recent purchases curled up in your tour bus blanket.

Let’s just say that Harry not so accidentally woke you up after that concert ready to love all of his adrenaline off in you.

Part 2👀

#harry styles love on tour #hslot #hslot Chicago #harry styles angst #harry styles smut #harry styles x y/n #harry styles fic #harry styles x you #harry styles x reader #Harry Styles #harry styles imagine #harry styles one shot

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so-writing · 2 years

Text

On Christmas, you tell the truth. 1/2 - Matthew Tkachuk

On Christmas, you tell the truth. But, at the same time, breaking up is hard to do.

December 3, 2020

Your nerves had you up earlier than usual and fussing around the kitchen like a crazy person. You were scrubbing counters that were already clean and constantly switching out the mug you were going to pour your coffee into as soon as it was done.

“Calm down,” you told yourself, “everything is fine.”

Apollo, the young German shepherd the two of you had recently adopted, could sense your anxiety and he was dancing around the kitchen the nearly the same as you were.

“Buddy,” you knelt down and scratched his ears, “I’m sorry. When dad’s home I’ll stop being a nutcase, I promise.”

Matthew Tkachuk was not someone you’d just started seeing. It was the complete opposite, actually, because you’d been together for almost three years. It was, however, the first time in your relationship that you went multiple days with no communication.

“Everything is fine,” you told yourself as you locked the door behind you and headed to your car to pick Matt up from the airport.

I know you haven’t landed but I’m on my way there now.

He didn’t respond, obviously, but you still couldn’t shake the weird vibe you were feeling as you drove to Calgary International Airport. The airport was spacious and it took you a few minutes to reach the arrivals gate where Matt’s flight would deplane but you managed to find it pretty quickly and tucked yourself into an uncomfortable chair in the corner of the room.

Here, Matty, can’t wait to see you.

Matt’s plane eased up to the gate and you did your best to keep your nerves in check as the passenger bridge stretched out to meet the door. You kept your eyes on the entrance to the airport, anxiously waiting for those gorgeous curls and beautiful white smile to appear.

When the passenger bridge began to fold up and pull away from the plane, and Matt was nowhere to be found, you began to panic. What the fuck was going on? Where was he?

Each time you called him, it rang once or twice before going to voicemail. Finally, on the fifth try, you got a response. Matt didn’t answer his phone but he did send a brief text message.

I’m not coming back yet, and I’m not coming back to you at all.

It felt like your heart stopped, like it fell out of your body and you were looking at it laying on the dirty airport floor as it struggled to beat and bled all over the carpet.

What happened?

He didn’t respond right away, giving you just enough time to run to the nearest bathroom and lock yourself in a stall before you fell apart.

This just isn’t working anymore. Honestly, it hasn’t worked in a while.

“Oh,” you said out loud, “that’s hilarious, Matthew.”

You did your best to keep your voice down but the love of your life had just ended your years long relationship via text message, so fuck it.

“It’s so funny that I’m actually laughing,” you weren’t, nearly sobbing was an option though, “because I’m pretty sure you fucking proposed to me last week, asshole.”

“Uh, miss?”

The voice of a stranger pulled you out of your episode, “what?!”

“Are you okay?”

“Definitely fucking not,” you sank to the ground while wiping the tears and ruined makeup from your face.

“Can I do anything?”

“Kill my fiancé? Well, he’s an ex now. Can you kill him anyway?”

“I can’t really do that, but I can walk you to your car or help you get a ride if you’d like?”

This stranger was showing you more kindness than Matt had of late and you couldn’t help yourself from crying again as you pulled yourself off the ground and exited the stall.

“Thanks, sorry, I’m so sorry, thank you so much for being nice to me while I throw a tantrum like this.”

“I’ve seen worse, miss, let’s get you out of here.”

His name was Nolan and he worked on the evening maintenance staff at the airport. He had been married to his high school sweetheart for three years and they had a baby on the way. He was kind, kinder than most people would probably be, and you were more than thankful for it.

“This one’s mine,” you spoke as you unlocked your car with the key fob, “thank you for this. You’ve been kinder and more accepting than you know.”

Nolan listened to you pour your heart out about Matt as he guided you through the airport to the parking garage without saying a word or passing any judgement. Lm

Thank fucking hell for people like Nolan.

“I just have one question, if you don’t mind?”

“Not at all, what is it?”

“Why is it that our relationship was solid only one fucking week ago with my family on goddamn Thanksgiving and all of a sudden he’s now willing to end it all? Like honestly, what the fuck? Why the fuck would he do this?”

“I.. I couldn’t tell you, miss.”

“Why would he propose, Nolan? If he knew he was going to end it, why the fuck would he ask me to marry him?!”

He said nothing and you suddenly felt guilty for unloading your bullshit onto a complete stranger.

“I’m sorry, Nolan, I’m so sorry. I’m just, I’m fucking going through it.”

“I know,” he was solemn, “if I were you, I’d demand answers. As far as I know, you don’t propose to someone you really love only to end the relationship a week later, just my two cents though.”

He wasn’t wrong, and it was in that moment that you realized you were more grateful to a complete stranger to anyone else in your life.

“Thanks, Nolan.”

“You’re welcome, good luck.”

You watched him walk away before unlocking your door and jumping into the driver’s seat.

“One more thing,” Nolan shouted across the parking garage, “make him pay for it.”

***

November 26, 2020, Thanksgiving

“We’re going to keep this to ourselves, right?”

“Of course, babe. None of my family knows your nutritionist so we’re good to eat whatever the fuck we want with no consequences!”

Turkey, ham, macaroni and cheese, mashed potatoes, stuffing and everything else Thanksgiving sat on the table in front of you both.

“I am going to eat until I explode.”

It was the second Thanksgiving with Matt, but the first one you spent together and with your family.

“Matthew,” your mother asked, “more mashed potatoes?”

“Yes, ma’am, always.”

“Anything else?”

You didn’t miss the brief look shared between your younger sister and him before they returned their attention to the table.

“Not yet, ma’am.”

Matt was entirely too proper, always calling your mother ma’am, but she found it adorable and didn’t discourage it.

“Are you guys done with the fancy shit? I want pumpkin pie!”

Everyone at the table laughed but you were too fixated on your father cutting up the pie to notice your mother, sister and Matt making stealthy moves behind you.

“Here,” your father handed you a plate full of pumpkin pie, “let’s eat on the porch?”

“Sure.”

Snow started to fall in the most perfect way. Big, thick flakes fell slowly as they landed in your hair and on your pie.

“Dad, we should go in, it’s snowing.”

“I know, not yet though. Just wait.”

The two of you continued to eat your pumpkin pie on the porch as the snow fell around you. When your pie was gone and your hair was nearly soaked with snowflakes you started to protest.

Your words caught in your throat when you turned to go back inside and saw Matt standing just outside the door in the most dashing suit you’d seen him in yet.

“Can I have a minute?”

Yes. Yes. Yes. Absolutely fucking yes. Matthew Tkachuk could have a million fucking minutes and if he asked for more, you’d gladly give them to him.

“I suppose so.”

He stepped out into the snow and your eyes caught the snowflakes falling into his curls.

“What’s going on, Matty?”

“Well,” he dropped to one knee and pulled a ring box out of his pocket, “I was thinking about proposing.”

“Yeah?”

“Absolutely yeah.”

He gently grabbed your hand and pulled you off the porch and down into the yard. Snow was falling heavily but it only added to the moment.

“You are my person, my girl, my everything. You are it for me, always have been.”

You were both wet from the cold snow but there wasn’t a time in your life you’d felt warmer. It was always obvious to you that something about Matthew was different than all your other relationships, but this clinched it. This was the real thing and this was the man you were going to spend the rest of your life with.

“Will you make me the happiest man in the world? Will you marry me?”

***

December 15, 2020

If someone knocked on your door right at that moment, and you actually willed yourself out of bed to answer, they would probably think you were a homeless person squatting in a disgusting apartment.

Thank god for contactless delivery.

The kitchen sink was full of dirty dishes and the counters were cluttered with empty takeout containers. There were random articles of clothing spread throughout every room in the apartment and your bedding hadn’t been changed or washed since you returned home from the airport the day Matt ended things.

You showered everyday but it never actually made a difference because you didn’t bother to wash your hair or clean your body, opting instead to lay in the bottom of the tub and cry while water poured down over you.

It was pitiful. You were pitiful but you didn’t care. The only thing that had been keeping you sane was Apollo and even he got tired of your misery. You had asked a friend, Avery, to keep him for a few days while you got yourself together but a few days turned into a few weeks and when she finally called around to ask what was going on with him, you took a few more blows to the heart.

“I know you’re going to be mad at me,” she sighed on the other end of the line while you braced yourself for whatever it was she was going to say.

You could take it, probably, “but I reached out to Matt.”

“For what? Why?”

The sound of someone else saying his name made your stomach hurt, and the thought of someone in your life speaking to him while you weren’t had tears sliding down your cheeks once again.

“Babe, Apollo is not my dog, I love him, but he’s not mine. You’re not in a place right now to care for a dog and since he is also Matt’s, I figured maybe he could come get him.”

“He can’t. He’s not even in Calgary.”

“Babe, he is in Calgary. He can’t have stayed in St. Louis this whole time, there are games between now and Christmas.”

Matt was back in Calgary and he never bothered to tell you or come home? As far as you were concerned, he still fucking lived in your apartment and it definitely showed because all his things were there.

“Well, that’s news to me.”

“I’m sorry.”

“So what’s happening? Is he coming to get Apollo? Does he not want him anymore? What?”

She was silent for a moment before speaking slowly, carefully planning what to say.

“He’s coming to get him but he asked me not to tell you when because, well, he didn’t go into detail or anything but he doesn’t want to see you.”

Another hot knife sliding across your skin, another wave of tears and this time, for the first time, anger.

“Tell me when he’s coming to get my dog. Tell me right now, you are closer to me than you ever were to him, Avery.”

“I know.”

“So tell me, now.”

“He left about twenty minutes ago. I’m sorry, I didn’t want to tell you because I knew you’d come over here and confront him and you’re not ready for that.”

“You don’t get to decide that. He’s back in fucking Calgary and we haven’t even spoken! This is his home and he hasn’t bothered to show up here! Where the fuck is he even staying?!”

You felt your voice rising as anger flooded through you. She was obviously right, you were definitely not ready to see Matt but it felt so deeply personal and painful that he was back in town and hadn’t bothered to even show up to gather his things or offer you any type of explanation for the current events.

I don’t know where he’s staying, he didn’t divulge that information and I wasn’t going to ask. Fuck, I didn’t keep this from you to hurt you, I would never do that. I did it because I don’t want him to see you like this. I don’t want him to see you still so broken while he isn’t at all. It isn’t fair.”

“Yeah, yeah, you’re probably right,” you squeezed your eyes shut to stop another wave of tears from falling, “what am I supposed to do though? He’s back here and now he’s got my--our--dog and I'm just nothing to him. I’ve never felt so fucking small, Avery.”

The two of you spoke for a few more minutes and she convinced you to meet her for breakfast in the next couple of days because you ‘needed to get the fuck out of both your head and your home.’ You said goodbye to her and placed your phone face down on the kitchen counter as you pondered over the conversation.

I don’t want him to see you still so broken while he isn’t at all. It isn’t fair.

He wasn’t hurting at all? Probably because he was fucking thriving with whoever the fuck it was that got in the way of your relationship. She was probably skinny and beautiful with perfect skin and flawless hair and a credit score of 850.

It isn’t fair.

No it wasn’t, it definitely wasn’t fucking fair. Matt dropped you like a bad habit on fire and you got no reason as to why it even happened in the first place. He owed you something, whether it be the legitimate reason or a lie entirely, he owed you. You’d been together for years and he had just placed a gorgeous diamond on your left hand with a look in his eyes that read forever. What had happened to change everything?

***

December 24, 2020, Christmas Eve

“Merry Christmas, Apollo,” you waved a new dog toy in the air, “wherever the fuck you are, because you’re definitely not here.”

Twenty one days had passed since Matt ended your relationship and you still hadn’t had any contact with him. He was probably home in St. Louis now, but he’d been back to Calgary since you last had contact because of hockey. Three weeks alone in your ‘shared’ apartment and it sounded like it was just the first of many to come.

You missed him. You missed Apollo. You missed Matt. You missed your past and everything that came with it. Roadies were nothing compared to this. It had gotten pretty obvious that he wasn’t coming back, probably ever, and you needed to pick yourself up from the ground, dust off, and move on.

It didn’t feel right putting up the big tree that you and Matt usually decorated together while dancing around sipping wine and listening to Christmas music, but you couldn’t abandon the holiday entirely. The sparse, cheap two foot christmas tree you bought last minute and hastily decorated felt like enough that year.

Christmas wasn’t truly Christmas without a classic movie, and you were too focused on the television in front of you to hear a key turn in the lock.

“Hello?”

The sound of a man’s voice had you jumping off the couch and screaming louder than probably necessary.

“Whoa, whoa, sorry.”

He held his hands up in defense and it wasn’t until you realized who it was that you let your guard down and stopped yelling.

“Johnny, what the fuck are you doing here?! It’s Christmas eve!”

“I’m here to grab some stuff for Matt.”

“On Christmas eve? He’s probably not even in town.”

Johnny looked to the ground as he hovered in the doorway. It was the second time you guessed Matt wasn’t in Calgary and it felt like it was also the second time you were wrong.

“So he is in Calgary then? That’s surprising, he’s such a family man.”

Johnny winced at the tone of your words before breaking his silence and surging forward.

“I’m sorry,” he said into your hair as he pulled you into a tight hug, “I don’t know what the fuck he’s thinking right now.”

It felt good to finally get the tiniest bit of closure. Johnny wasn’t Matt but maybe he could offer some kind of explanation, you’d take anything at that point.

“Why are you here, Johnny? Why isn’t he? Why hasn’t he come home yet? What is going on? What did I do?”

Word vomit fell past your lips faster than you could stop it but it was the first, tiniest bit of line Matt was throwing for you and you were definitely taking the bait.

“I can’t answer most of that, but I can tell you that he’s been staying with us and that Apollo is good, really good. He’s such a happy dog.”

“I know, it’s like he takes after his parents, oh wait..”

“Shit, I'm sorry. This is weird and I don’t like it. Matt’s staying at mine though, and he’s fine.”

“Of course he is. Is he ‘new girl fine’ though?”

“I’m not supposed to be on your side, but yeah, he’s that level of fine.”

“Holy fuck.”

Holy fuck. You collapsed into yourself and began to sob while Johnny broke your fall and helped you to the ground, holding you while you sobbed into his jacket. If Matthew was already with someone else, there was no way they weren’t communicating when he asked you to marry him. There was no way he wasn’t emotionally, and maybe physically, cheating on you.

“How long?”

He shrugged his shoulders and pulled you closer, “longer than you want to hear. I know you don’t want to hear any of this but I'm tired of lying for him. He shouldn’t have proposed to you.”

If you didn’t want to disappear into a black hole before, you definitely did now. What was the point anymore? The man you trusted and loved and planned to spend the rest of your life with had been fucking around on you and lying about it. You weren’t sure how long you sat on the floor and cried to one of Matt’s closest friends and teammates but when you finally started to get it together, you asked the real question.

“Why are you here, Johnny? It’s Christmas eve, you should be home with your wife. What did he send you to get?”

“The ring. The better question is for you though, why are you still wearing it?”

“I don’t know,” the diamond sparkled on your finger, “I guess I was hoping for the best.”

The ring Matt had picked out for you was beautiful, more beautiful than you could have imagined but it felt fake and cheap now, almost like it was given to you based on a total lie.

You weren’t going to give in so easily. If Matt wanted his precious ring back, he would have to man up and come get it himself. He wasn’t going to get away with sending someone else to do his dirty work and ride off into the sunset with his new girl.

“If he wants it, he knows where it is. He can come get it himself, he knows where I live. Once upon a time, he used to live here too. Will you remind him of that?”

You and Johnny spoke for a little while longer before exchanging goodbyes. He went without the ring and you were left alone wondering who the fuck Matt had left you for.

Do not ask other people to get their hands dirty just so you can keep yours clean, Matthew. It’s all for nothing because they were never clean anyway, you fucking cheater.

You had no idea whether or not Matt had blocked your number, but you were so pissed off and hurt that you didn’t care. He had no problem leaving you in the rearview mirror so you matched his energy, deciding to call him out on his bullshit.

***

December 25, 2020, Christmas

It would’ve been easy to go home to your parents, who happened to live only twenty minutes away, and spend the holiday with them but you weren’t exactly up to it. Johnny’s surprise visit and the news he shared broke your heart even more than you already thought was possible.

Matt didn’t respond to your text, but it was delivered and read a few hours later, so he at least acknowledged it. How nice of him to not block your number, what a kind soul.

Determined to keep wallowing in your own pity, you googled ‘sad christmas movies without a happy ending’ and started with the one people thought was the most miserable and started working your way down the list.

At about 9pm, your phone rang and when you saw who was calling, your breath caught in your throat.

Chantal Tkachuk.

Other than Johnny, who was kind of forced into it, no one in Matt’s life had reached out to you since before the break up. You were close to both Matt’s younger sister, Taryn, and Brady’s long term girlfriend but neither one of them made any attempt to see how you were doing. They were obviously Matt’s people before they were yours, so it made sense, but it still hurt a lot.

The Tkachuks had become a second family to you and not only had Matt ripped himself away from you, he also took them too.

“Hello?”

You couldn’t stop the waver in your voice and she definitely heard it.

“Oh, honey,” she instantly went into mom mode, “how are you?”

“I’ve been better,” you were openly crying now, once again.

“I know, and I'm so sorry. I really don’t know what happened.”

“Me neither, because everything was fine and we were engaged and the next thing I know, I’m waiting at the airport for someone that isn’t going to show up and i’m getting dumped through text message.”

Chantal was silent for a few moments and you could feel tension easing itself into the phone call. On one hand, you’d been like another daughter to her for several years now, but Matt was her oldest son and she was always going to take his side regardless of the situation.

“I don’t even know what to say right now, I'm just so sorry. Whatever he was thinking or going through, he shouldn’t have handled it the way he did. He shouldn’t have proposed if he wasn’t ready.”

It flew out of your mouth without a thought and you immediately regretted it, “you mean he shouldn’t have proposed if he was cheating?”

You weren’t talking to just anyone, you were talking to Matt’s fucking mother, stop speaking so candidly, “oh my god, Chantal, i’m sorry. I didn’t mean to say that.”

“I can’t exactly be mad at you for it, I don’t know for sure if that was what was happening but based on the timeline of events, assumptions can be made.”

That was the most you were going to get out of her and you knew it. She was wording her thoughts delicately to avoid using ‘cheating’ and her precious son in the same sentence. It shouldn’t have, but like everything else that was fucking happening, it hurt.

“I still shouldn’t have said it, not to you. I’m sorry.”

The call got kind of awkward as she brushed off your apology and began asking you about your life and how you’ve been, like her son hadn’t ruined your fucking life.

Did you have a good holiday? No. Do you have any fun plans for New Years? No. How has work been? I’ve been calling off a lot because I'm constantly having a breakdown.

“I know things are tense and weird right now, but I’m still here. You can always reach out to me if you need anything at all.”

It wasn’t true, but you thanked her anyway. You knew this was probably the last contact you’d have with Chantal Tkachuk. The word goodbye felt heavy on your tongue but you said it anyway and ended the call.

“Merry Christmas,” you whispered into your once happy, now empty apartment.

***

December 31, 2020, New Year’s Eve

“I’m glad you’re coming out with me tonight.”

“I don’t know why I am, you gave my dog away.”

“Shut up,” Avery gently punched you in the shoulder, “i’d still have him now if I didn’t. Besides, it’s not like I threw him out on the street.”

“Yeah, I guess, I wonder how he likes his new mom.”

“Shut up, we’re not talking about Matthew tonight. Tonight is about you and moving on. Moping time and feeling sorry for yourself is over.”

“Does it have to be?”

“Yes.”

In the spirit of new beginnings, Avery chose a bar neither of you had ever been to. It was a little more high end than you expected but it was a nice change of pace. With the exception of work and running to the grocery store, you’d barely been out of your place in almost a month.

Avery made sure your glass was never empty as more of your friends joined the party and you mingled with them and strangers alike. You had to admit that it was nice to get out of your head and spend some time around people that actually care for you. You’d been spending so much time thinking about the one that didn’t that you’d been taking for granted the ones who did.

Midnight crept closer and you were pleasantly tipsy and enjoying yourself quite a bit.

It was nowhere near perfect but this evening, surrounded by your friends and drinks and excitement, was almost ok. It was the first time in a month you felt whole and even a little bit excited about what was to come in your future.

You decided you were going to start looking for a new place to live as soon as you woke up the next morning and a few of your friends were even coming over to help you start packing later in the day.

No one was openly saying it was time for you to move on, but they were hyping you up in such a way that it only felt right. Finally.

“Three minutes to midnight!”

Someone out of sight shouted and you froze, because you knew that voice and if Brady Tkachuk was here at this bar in Calgary that meant one thing.

Turning in the direction his voice had come from, your eyes desperately scanned the rooftop in search of him, hoping he would be with just his brother and teammates and that what you actually saw wasn’t real.

It was real though, it was too real and the sight of them together made your stomach hurt. You did your best not to think about what she might have looked like, but seeing her in the flesh had you spiralling. This girl, Matt’s new girl, the one he had completely abandoned you for, really didn’t look any different than you did. It was almost worse than her being your complete opposite. You couldn’t focus on her too long though, as usual, Matt’s presence alone commanded your attention.

You hadn’t seen him in such a long time. His curls had gotten longer and he had more facial hair and you hated how good he looked in the sleek black suit he was wearing. You’d never seen it before and it was another knife to your heart to realize that he’d gone out and bought new clothes instead of coming home to get his own.

“Let’s go downstairs, come on,” Avery had seen him too, “this is not going to happen.”

Throwing back the contents of your champagne flute, you thrust it into her hand, “of course it is. This was bound to happen right?”

The liquid courage running through your veins and stopping your brain from thinking rationally had taken control and you were marching over to Matt before anyone in your group could stop you.

“Well if it isn’t my roommate, so nice to see you’re back in Calgary. I’m glad you got home safe, where have you been staying? Because it’s definitely not been our apartment.”

The tone of your voice was sharp enough to cut glass but Brady was in front of you before you could get a reaction from Matt, “this is not the place. Please, go back to your friends.”

“I think I’ll stay here, actually.”

Stepping around Brady, you made eye contact with your ex for the first time since he left. He looked a lot less worried and a lot more smug than you’d hoped.

“Ten! Nine! Eight!”

The crowd around you began chanting the countdown to the new year but you stayed in place, refusing to be the one to break eye contact first.

“Seven! Six! Five!”

Avery was beside you now and begging, “come on please, let’s get out of here?”

“Four! Three!”

“He’s going to fucking kiss her in front of you,” Brady shouted over the chant, “listen to your friend, you don’t want to see!”

“Two! One!”

You won the battle, but not the war, because Brady was spot on. When Matt’s eyes left yours they met those of his new flame and their lips connected.

“Happy New Year!”

It probably should’ve hurt, like everything else he did in the last month, and maybe it would at some point, but anger had taken control at that point.

A bitter, hollow laugh crawled up your throat, “you’re such a dick, I can’t believe I’ve been wasting all this time moping over you.”

“I can’t believe I’ve been so hurt over a guy who broke up with me over a text message and was too much of a coward to face me that he just literally never came home. Nice suit by the way, you’ve got a closet full of them back at my apartment.”

While strangers around you were celebrating, no one in your bubble said a single word. So you kept going.

“I don’t have your ring on me,” you turned your attention on the girl attached to him briefly, “he proposed to me actually, but if I did I’d throw it off the side of this building. She’s above used merchandise. That’s why you wanted it back, right? So you could give it to someone else?”

Matt kept silent as you hurled accusations and insults at him but his face had fallen considerably and it wasn’t until a soft “can we please go?” came out of his new girlfriend’s mouth that you stopped.

You were done, completely and entirely, with Matthew Tkachuk.

“I’ll actually remove myself from the situation, let you lovers enjoy your night. Happy New Year, bud, take care, hope to see you never.”

You crowded into an Uber with Avery and a few others, everyone excitedly cheering you on for standing up to Matt. It felt good, better than you thought it would, and you didn’t even cry.

Your phone vibrated with a text message that you definitely didn’t expect.

Didn’t think you had that in you. Not mad at it though and definitely glad I got to see it. Take care of yourself, bud.

***

January 3, 2021

You knew he was coming, he’d finally reached out to you to let you know, but you were a ball of nerves anyway. The last time you saw Matt, you were screaming at him on a crowded rooftop bar while everyone around you celebrated the new year.

Your liquid courage carried you through that evening but you’d been sober since, so seeing him was going to be really fucking weird. Not just weird, seeing him was going to make you sad. As much as you didn’t want to be, you couldn’t help it. You weren’t over him yet.

“Come in,” you were quick to respond to his soft knock on the door, “you still live here, Matt, you don’t need an invitation.”

“Yeah, sorry. I’ll be quick, just here to get my stuff.”

“Cool.”

Cool? You’ve gotta be fucking kidding me, that’s how you respond?

You shook off your nerves but gave him space as he made his way into the bedroom and began to pull his clothes from your shared closet.

“We should probably go through this together,” he called out as soon as he entered the bathroom, “we shared a lot of bath stuff.”

“Sure, i’ll be in shortly.”

This was it. You’d said it plenty of times before but this was really, truly it. Your relationship with Matthew Tkachuk was coming to a close and the only thing left between the two of you was this apartment.

You slowly wandered into the bathroom and stood next to him while the two of you began to separate your bath products.

“Should I leave this body wash?”

“No, I know how much you like it, keep it.”

“You sure? I know you like it too.”

“I know where to order it from, but I'm pretty sure you don’t.”

“Shut up, it’s like, Lucky or something, right?”

“It’s Lush, Matty.”

“Yeah, Lush sounds right. So does that.”

“What?”

“Matty.”

“..What?”

“Matty sounds right. It sounds even better coming from you.”

Hold the fuck up.

There was no goddamn way he was going to try and appeal to you like the sad ex when he was the one who cheated! No fucking way!

“Yeah? That’s interesting, because ‘i love you’ sounds pretty good to me but you couldn’t honor that, right? Actually, instead of Matty, I should’ve called you a cheating, lying asshole.”

“Please don’t do this.”

“Don’t do what? Call you out? Make you accountable for your actions? Fuck you, Matt. Get your shit and get out. I don’t want to see you again.”

He listened, and he left. Goodbye, Matthew.

***

March 21, 2021

“Did you hear?”

“Hear what?”

“About Matt?”

“No, I'm not interested in anything to do with him.”

“You might like this.”

“I probably won’t.”

Your relationship with Matthew had been over for a long time and you were finally past him. There was no need to bring anything up from the past.

“His girl has been cheating on him, like the entire time they’ve been together.”

“I told you I didn't care. I don’t care. I don’t want to hear about him.”

“Sorry,” she scrambled for the right words, “I'm sorry. I didn’t know. Don’t fire me?”

“Wouldn’t dream of it, get back to work though, the Palmer wedding isn’t going to plan itself.”

“On it, boss!”

You chuckled to yourself, Matt had never been the one to prove himself to be a decent human. As much as you didn’t want to hear any update on his life, you couldn’t deny the minuscule amount of pleasure you felt when you heard he cheated.

Since your breakup with Matt, you boarded the success train and rode to the top. You were a single, small event planner when you first got together, but now you owned a company with your name on it and had a slew of employees.

There was nowhere but up for you to go and you couldn’t have been happier.

“We had a cancellation, it was a big one.”

“Oh? What was the last name?”

“Tkachuk?”

“What was the first name?”

“The groom’s name was Matthew. He was the one who cancelled. A bunch of emails from the disgruntled bride have come in since.”

No. No. No fucking way. This was the last thing you needed.

“What did the emails say?”

“They were mostly complaining about you. Which is really weird because how could you possibly know the groom?”

“No idea,” you lied, “I'll handle it though.”

Part Two coming soon!

#matty tkachuk #matt tkachuk #matthew tkachuk #ooooh yeaaaa #nhl imagine #hockey imagine

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sadomas0chist · 3 years

Text

perfect strangers

MINORS DNI // 18+

part one; part two; part three

genre: nsfw

pairings: jean kirschtein x female reader

word count: 2.6k

tags/warnings: penetrative sex, dom jean, fingering, praising kink, slight body worship, dirty talk, sneaky.

synopsis: your recent discovery makes you certain that you won't be able to control yourself around him and neither will he, hence you decide that it was time to make an agreement that was rather spicy.

a.n: hey babies! so i finally decided to turn this into a short series since some of you were intrigued with the idea of having a continuation for the previous part i wrote. i hope you like it, enjoy <3

“How was I supposed to know?!” I yelled as soon as Jean exited our apartment. I had put on a random t-shirt to follow Connie to his room, trying to convince him that I had no idea that I fucked his best friend.

“Y/n he literally told you his name is Jean and he was attending my party. You’re acting as you’ve never seen him before!” he scolded taking off his shirt and throwing it across his room.

“Oh for fuck’s sake Connie. The last time I saw Jean I was 16 and he didn’t look like that. He’s so fucking different now how was I supposed to know. And to be fair, he was studying abroad for I don’t know how many years, how was I supposed to know that he metamorphosed like that.” I motioned my arm out, my other hand resting on my hip.

He groaned, rubbing his temples before he looked back at me. “Look,” he spoke softly. “I don’t want to fight with you over this okay? You’re right, I should’ve told you that he was coming back. He graduated a year ago and was considering coming back to his hometown, here. Let’s just forget it all happened okay? It’s a simple misunderstanding.” I nodded, resting my head on his chest as he embraced me into a tight hug.

“Now go take a shower you reek of sex.” he snickered earning a punch on his arm. He winced rubbing his flesh, a proud smile setting on my face.

***

The week went by smoothly. I told Sasha and Hitch what happened and they both had different reactions. Hitch was gushing over the sex and Sasha on the other hand confessed that she forgot to mention that Jean was coming back to stay here. It’s okay though. We all passed it and I was working my ass off to finally graduate.

Connie was spending his days with Jean, which granted me a lot of peace and tranquility. At least, that’s what I thought.

I hadn’t spoken to Jean ever since we hooked up, figured that Connie already explained the whole situation and moved on.

Three knocks on my door broke my focus, a loud frustrated sigh leaving my lips. “What Connie!”

“Actually,” a voice on the other side of the door caught me off guard. “It’s Kirschtein. Can I come in?” A knot formed in my throat.

“Sure.” he turned the knob, slowly coming in. “Connie knows I’m here by the way.” I nodded, adjusting my seat.

“What’s up?” the tension was awkward. The tension shouldn’t even be present in the first place. But how could I not get aroused when he was wearing a black tank top showing off the tattoos on his sleeves with a pair of sweats. He looked effortlessly attractive.

“- and like I said it will never happen again. Y/n?”

“Huh? Oh yeah, yeah. Never happen again. I’m very sorry but I need to finish this assignment.” He chuckled and nodded leaving me alone with my thoughts. Did I just make him talk to himself because I was too busy checking him out?

I shook my head, assuming that whatever he said wasn’t worth my time. Time went by rather quickly and the assignment was done earlier than I expected. It was already ten pm, and I had promised the girls I was going to meet up with them for some drinks.

I picked my outfit and applied some makeup. Simple and effective. We were going to spend the night at Sasha’s so I didn’t make much effort to look hot.

The place was empty when I left and I assumed that Connie was helping Jean to rent an apartment for himself.

Sasha’s place wasn’t very far from mine. As a matter of fact, it only took me ten minutes to get there. Once I got there, the girls were already ordering pizza and picking out some movies to watch.

“Hey whores.” I greeted them, earning cheers from Hitch and Sasha. “Oh my god, Mikasa I missed you!” I rushed to the dark-haired girl who was sitting on the couch and engulfed her into a tight hug. I haven’t seen Mikasa since I moved with Connie. We used to live together, but after she and Eren got together, he wouldn’t leave her alone. So I figured it would be best if I left and lived with my brother.

“I missed you too! I looked for you everywhere at that party where were you?” she asked taking a sip of her soda. Hitch began coughing dramatically as Sasha giggled next to her. “Oh quit it.” I teased rolling my eyes.

I ended up telling her everything, her face displaying a plethora of expressions. “I mean, Jean did change I can’t argue with that. But didn’t he recognize you?”

I shrugged. “I changed too. Puberty hit me like a truck.”

“Cheers to that.” Hitch raised her cup. We laughed and talked for hours. I missed going out with them like that. Fortunately, college will be over soon and I’ll have some time for myself.

Movies were playing in the background but we paid them no mind. We ate our food and cleaned the living room, not wanting to bother Sasha with the cleaning since she was having Niccolo over tomorrow.

I glanced at the clock that was hanging above the door. I gathered my stuff and tucked them in my bag, drawing all of their eyes on me.

“Already? Come on stay longer!” Sasha whined. I smiled softly at her and shook my head.

“I can’t, I’ll see you guys soon.” I waved at them and walked out of the door.

***

“Connie! I’m ho- what are you still doing here?” I froze at the entrance, my keys still hanging from my index finger, my eyes fixated on him as he only stood in basketball shorts.

“What do you mean what am I still doing here. I moved in here remember?”

Silence. Nothing but intense and awkward silence. Moved in? Since when?

“I told you when I came into your room. Weren’t you listening to me?” I stared at him blankly, not able to explain how caught in thought I was when he came into my room. I was too busy checking him out to care about what he was trying to tell me.

“Why didn’t Connie tell me?” I closed the door and locked it slowly, my legs feeling weak, the idea of living with him and seeing him walking around like that making me weak. And extremely horny.

“He said he’d rather if I told you. You know, break the ice.” he shrugged and walked forward, his chest now a few inches apart from mine. “You changed a lot from what I remember.” he lowly said tucking my hair behind my ear.

“So did you,” I replied, staring at his lips. He licked his bottom lip and held my chin between his fingers, forcing me to maintain eye contact.

I was a sweating mess. I still couldn’t believe that this was Jean, the horse face. What kind of water did he drink, and how did he get so big? Look at those muscles-

A sudden feeling on my lips interrupted my chain of thoughts. I soon realized that he held my bottom lip between his brown ones. “Kiss me back y/n, I know you want to,” he whispered, his breath brushing up my face.

It didn’t take me long to pull him to me, crashing my lips on his. He was intoxicating in ways I couldn’t understand nor explain. I needed him close to me at the moment and I didn’t care why.

“Yo, Jean where did you my video game?!” Connie’s voice boomed from the hallway, forcing us apart. Realization slapped my face when I looked at him and saw his cocky smirk. I just kissed him, even though I promised myself I’d never do anything with him ever again.

“I’ll get it!” he yelled back, the same expression resting on his face, his back facing the hallway. “I’d apologize, but you pulled me back. Anyway, I’ll see around beautiful.” he winked and began walking towards Connie’s room, his back muscles flexing at his movements.

What am I doing with myself?

***

The atmosphere felt nice. I couldn’t sleep so instead I lied down on my bed and watched the stars from my window. I couldn’t stop thinking about what happened hours ago and how I had to sit with them and pretend as nothing happened.

Jean was certainly not the little boy he was years ago. He got more confident and a lot more handsome. He was fucking with me and I thought, why shouldn’t I fuck with him too?

After all, I know for sure he didn’t tell Connie anything. He’s too protective of me and if he knew, well let’s just say Jean would be moving out by tomorrow. He trusts him blindly and I honestly just think he doesn’t want me to hook up with him again because he’s just like him.

He likes to mess around. Not the type to stay in the morning after. But neither was I. I sighed and dragged my legs out of bed, my body following.

“Shit now I gotta pee,” I whined stomping slightly on the wooden floor. I ruffled my hair with my hand and slipped on my slippers. I was wearing Connie’s t-shirt, so it was long enough to hide my thighs.

I walked to the bathroom when suddenly a hand grabbed my arm and yanked me into the guest bedroom. My mouth was quick to be silenced by another hand as I was about to squeal.

My back collided with the wall, my hands pinned on each side of my head.

“Jean let me go.” I struggled to get out of his grasp but he kept grinning at me. “Sure.” He let go of his grasp.

I looked around to notice a towel on his bed. “I was going to take a shower but then I heard your footsteps, couldn’t let you get there before I did.” He walked away, throwing his towel over his shoulder.

“Is that all?” I cocked my eyebrow, crossing my arms. He looked me up and down before saying: “You tell me. Need anything else?”

I looked at him briefly, calculating my next move. “An agreement. Connie can’t know.”

“Fuck yeah.” he dropped his towel and stepped closer to me, holding my face with his hands as he crashed his lips on mine. I kissed him back instantly, my fingers finding their way through his hair.

His tongue slipped in, caressing mine. His hands went down my body to squeeze my ass, pulling me even closer to him. My hands traveled across his bare chest, going over his pecs and then gliding one hand down his abs, while the other sat on his shoulder.

We pulled apart, his arms going under my thighs to pull me up and sit me onto the mattress. He walked to the door, locking it before he looked back at me.

Jean crawled over my body, caging me between his arms. “Divine.” he smiled and sat up, his hands tugging at my top. I helped him take it off and threw it on his chair. I was nude underneath him. It wasn’t the first time, yet he still looked mesmerized.

He licked his lips, his fingers tracing my cunt before dipping into my entrance. I arched my back at the sudden intrusion, trying my best to remain quiet.

“I missed your little cunt.” he chuckled massaging my insides slowly. I gasped, my hand immediately covering my mouth.

He rubbed my bud with his thumb, his pace never changing. It was torturing and slow, but I knew we couldn’t make a lot of noise nor make lots of movements that could awake Connie. We had to go nice and easy.

My legs squirmed, the combination of playing my nipples and watching him touch like he does driving me to the edge. My eyes rolled to the back as he added a third finger, my walls clenching tightly around them as I felt myself orgasm around them. “Good girl.” he praised with a chuckle, removing his fingers from my opening.

“Suck your juices off come on.” he tapped my hand, motioning me to remove it and take his fingers in. I stuck my tongue out, his ling digits finding their way down my throat making me slightly gag. “I didn’t know you were such an obedient girl.” he cooed, as I sucked off my arousal.

Jean sat back up, removing his shorts along with his briefs, his erection slapping on my lower stomach. “As much as I’d love you to suck me,” he paused pumping his cock. “I have to say that I miss being inside you.” And with that, he slid all the way in, his mouth silencing my moans.

He stayed still for a while, his eyes staring into mine intensely, almost as if he was trying to tell me something. I nodded my head, his hips moving at my signal. His thrusts were slow and deep, going over every spot. I wrapped my arms around him, my forehead resting against his, as he breathed heavily.

“I want to fuck you dumb, but he’ll hear your moans.” he taunted rolling his hips, his tip almost hitting my cervix. “So good.” I whimpered, wrapping my legs around him, my heels digging into his lower back.

“Jean…” I was close and my legs were a shaking mess. “That’s right baby, say my name.” he breathed in my ear, slightly speeding up his thrusts. I bit onto his shoulder, my orgasm ripping through my body.

I tightened around him, his strokes getting sloppier. It came to my attention that he wasn’t wearing protection, and I wasn’t about to get adventurous like last time. “Jean… pull out…”

“Beg.” was his only reply to which I complied. “Please, anywhere, just not-“ He harshly pulled out, and instead of jerking himself on my stomach, he reached up to straddle my chest and stroked himself. “Open.”

I stuck my tongue out, his hand now replaced with mine as I jerked him off, ropes of cum shooting down my throat. “Such a good girl.” he chuckled, rubbing his hand over his face.

He got off me and pulled his hair back using both hands, his naked body walking around the bed to grab some tissues. He cleaned off my arousal and handed me some to clean the corners of my lips.

“If only you could see how messed up you look,” he smirked and threw me my t-shirt before grabbing his towel and sliding on his shorts.

I put on my top and got off his bed. I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror and internally yelled at myself. I looked like a mess. My hair was tangled and my skin was all sweaty. Guess I have to take a shower too.

I looked over at Jean to see him staring at me with an amused look on his face. “What?” I cocked my eyebrow. He shrugged and smiled at me. “Connie and I are going out to get some lunch tomorrow. What’d you say?” he requested.

“I mean yeah sure. But Jean he can-“

“Can’t know alright.” he rolled his eyes. We stared at each other for a minute before I decided to leave his room.

As I made my way past him, his hand flew to cup my swollen cunt. “This belongs to me.”

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cinnamonest · 3 years

Text

//some horrendous gaslighting

I love my stranger-to-noncon very much but I don't give enough attention to consensual relationships taking a turn for the worse, or utterly toxic and abusive boyfriends and Kaeya is the perfect candidate for that so here we go.

-----

I've mentioned before the Kaeya would be exceptionally violent in comparison to other yanderes, but it's important to note that he's also among the most emotionally sensitive, and those two things do not go together well.

Not sensitive outwardly, of course, he's spent years developing that personality of his as a defense mechanism, can easily pretend he doesn't care about anything, but deep down that abandonment complex and those insecurities are strong and easily triggered. Some of the ways it manifests are mild, like how he gets overly attached to you within a week of knowing you, commits and tries to move way too fast even in completely mutual and consensual relationships. The kind of guy that suggests moving in together a week into the relationship, and dropping I love you so early on that you're left to merely blink in surprise because you barely know each other, but under the pressure and awkwardness you find yourself stuttering out a reciprocation, even though it's quite untrue. Guilt-trips and pressures his way into fucking you within a couple of days.

He's a very different person behind closed doors, it comes out maybe a month in when he lets the walls drop and lets himself trust you. He's more vulnerable, sweeter. Oddly... Eager to trust. It's like he desperately wants someone he can latch onto and show some vulnerability around and chose you to be that someone.

But also different in other ways. More... Bitter. More grumpy. More immature.

He's not sensitive in general, he doesn't really care about what most people say or do, but that sensitivity comes out once he's attached to a person, which happens rather quickly. You start noticing it rather quickly in a mutual relationship, and it likely shocks you honestly that he's so... immature. You spend the day with one of your friends -- just one, catch up with them, haven't seen them in a while... and when you get home things are rather quiet. He's usually a very talkative person, so you can't figure out what's wrong. Maybe something bad happened, but he insists no, it's fine. There's nothing wrong. And then you catch the last part, much quieter, spoken under his breath in that lighthearted tone he speaks in, yet with a bitterness to it.

You wouldn't care anyway, you're too busy with your friends.

It takes you by surprise at first because holy shit, really? It seems so petulant that it can't possibly be real, but... Maybe he really did have a bad day and is just getting his anger out by directing it at the first thing he can. That's not right, but hey, everyone has weak moments where they do some bad things. Besides, you weren't there for him, so he feels worse right? Still, you spent every day the past month except this one day with him... No, it's just poor timing, that's all.

Until it happens again. And again. And he swears he likes your friends, smiles at them, but it... Looks forced. Always complaining that you spend so much time with them and completely ignore him. Do you even care? Do you value the relationship at all? You try to not get angry and be rational, but still defend yourself because you spend almost all of your time with him don't you? You can't get much out before he just huffs and stomps away, rolls his eyes (well, you assume he rolls both of them, you can't tell but-- nevermind, not the point) and gives you a cold shoulder. Until you apologize, then it's like the switch has flipped back on, there's love and smiles and warmth and hugs again.

It starts to get on your nerves. You start to wonder if maybe this isn't healthy for you, if maybe you should end things, but you decide to give him another chance, right? We all make mistakes. He's under a lot of stress. Just... It'll be fine.

And the first time it gets physical he swears it's an accident. It leaves an ugly scar. You're going out because come on, it's my family, I haven't seen them in forever.

It just happens, he explains, it's unintentional, emotions get channeled through the vision like that. Comforts you as you sit on the ground crying and clutching your arm that he grabbed as you walked out the door, skin darkened and purplish from the freeze that's seared through a layer of your skin. He sighs and says he's sorry, really, he feels horrible already, so don't get mad, ok? He already feels terrible enough... Don't be mean. He didn't mean it. Don't be mean. Don't be fucking mean about it, stop fucking crying. You're making him feel worse.

He seems genuinely sorry, you tell yourself. It's not his fault. You can't blame him. It's ok.

It's harder to excuse the next time it gets physical. Maybe freezing last time was unintentional, and maybe it hurt, but you weren't terrified like this. A hand around your throat is different.

But can you blame him? You were threatening to leave. Honestly, you weren't approaching it healthily, you weren't trying to actually have a serious talk, you were trying to guilt him and gaslight him and it's honestly emotionally abusive, you know? You're the one in the wrong here. How selfish and cruel. How can you do that and not even feel guilty?

It makes you rethink. It makes you question your own sanity. And it makes you apologize. Makes you say you didn't mean it. You find yourself feeling dizzy, disoriented, like everything isn't real and everything is too much. You try to sleep it off.

And he doesn't like delving into the past. He tries to avoid it. Tries to not think about it. Doesn't even really tell you anything until nearly a year in, a drunken confession of sadness and misery. It makes you feel guilty somehow. Poor thing. He's been through a lot, you tell yourself. Maybe you should be more patient and understanding, help him work through it. You can fix him, per se, can't you? Sure, people say that never works, but... He just needs love, really, it's not like he's that bad.

He hates bringing it up like this even more. It just feels weak and vulnerable but it comes out anyway. You're threatening him again, and honestly, that's a sickening thing to do considering what you know, how can you be so vicious?

You're just like everyone else, aren't you?

You're just going to abandon him like this was nothing. You don't care at all. You're heartless. Ungrateful. He's done so much for you. And this is how you repay him, huh? Disappointing, honestly. He thought you were special. Kind. Understanding. Didn't realize you were just as cruel as everyone else in his life, aren't you?

He just has this way of making you doubt yourself. You pull at your hair and cry. I'm going insane. You keep the thought to yourself, but you fall to your knees and promise you're really sorry this time. He sighs. Fine, he'll give you another chance. He's a patient man. You just need to work on yourself, become a less toxic person.

But apparently that's not enough, and eventually you get dumped.

It comes as a surprise. But he says he's had enough of you being so emotionally manipulative and neglectful. You hardly ever spend time with him (like, only 29 days a month? Unbelievable!). You cry and try to make him feel bad, when the things he does aren't that bad. You always claim to be too tired to fuck. You try to gaslight him into thinking all that's acceptable. It's toxic and abusive, so, he's done.

You find yourself in shock. Confusion. It feels unreal. The first thing you worry about is if you can even find a new boyfriend... Your body is completely littered in freeze-burn scars by now, after all.

Were you really in the wrong? You're not too experienced in relationships, maybe he's right about everything he said... Maybe you really did him wrong...

Which is why you come crawling back. Crying. Apologizing.

Exactly as planned.

So he sighs and agrees. Fine. You can have another chance.

The second time, the third time, he always forgives you and takes you back. Even though you don't deserve it. He just loves you so much, you know? He keeps forgiving you.

Until one day you don't show up.

When you leave that time, you seem almost angry. You don't cry this time. Your hands ball into fists and for once, for the first time, as you storm out, you say--

Fine.

Unusual, but you were always moody like that. Odd choice of words. No matter, it's not like you're actually fine with it, you'll come crawling back any minute now.

It's already been several hours. Why aren't you at his doorstep already? Did he make you feel that bad? Maybe he went too far... You're probably just at home crying or something. You'll come back by tomorrow morning.

You don't.

Ok. Maybe you feel too guilty. Maybe you're reflecting on how awful you've been. That would take some time to get over, since you've done so many bad things. It won't be long before you come back.

A day passes. Two days pass.

What's taking you so long?

He finally swallows his pride. Maybe you're being stubborn. Trying to make him feel bad. Yeah, that's something you'd do. Or maybe you're trying to make him feel all alone, take advantage of the one thing you know bothers him. How mean. But he loves you. You know that. So you'll appreciate it when he checks on you, apologizes for maybe going too far, and he really loves you, he loves you so much, so how about you two just go home and forget this ever happened and have lots and lots of makeup sex and cuddle? And then you can tell him you're sorry and love him too and promise to stay forever? He's already got the speech practiced a few times in his head walking over to your place, the one you haven't really lived in for a while now since he demanded you basically move in with him. All your clothes and stuff are at his place now. You would have taken that with you if you ever actually intended to leave, so clearly this is a ploy to get him to come to you, as if that wasn't already obvious.

Your eyes narrow when you open the door and your face contorts with anger. And you snarl that you've had enough. He wants you gone so much, fine, you're more than happy to oblige, you say. You're done. You don't even need your shit, keep it, you'd rather lose your stuff than set foot in that place again. You finally came to your senses and you're fucking done.

You say nasty things. You say he made your life a living hell and you're happy to be rid of him.

And then you say something worse. Something that sets something deep inside off. Something that feels like a stab to the gut.

You say if you'd known the truth about him you would have kicked him out a long time ago.

Maybe it's not about the same thing. Not meant the same way. But it feels too familiar nonetheless.

You see him freeze up. He just stands still for a moment. Not saying anything. Face blank and empty. His eye twitches.

You couldn't care less. Besides, you already have a new boyfriend, one that's nice to you, you tell him with a prideful spite in your voice. One that doesn't have fucking issues. You're not a therapist, you say, and you tell him to figure out his problems on his own, and you slam the door in his face.

Or, you try to. He catches the door before it can close with one hand. Grabs your arm with the other.

For once he doesn't say anything, not until you make him. Just grabs you, drags you down the street by your shirt. It nearly chokes you, but you manage to start to scream. He slams your back into the nearest building, grabs your shoulders and says to shut the fuck up or I'll break your fucking arms. You go wide eyed and scared tears run down you're face. You're scaring me, you plead. Let me go.

But he doesn't. You figure maybe you can talk sense into him when you get there. You don't realize how far gone he is, you don't think that this might be the last time you set foot outside, the last time you see the sun not through a window. You don't think any of the things you'll wish you had down the road.

You've had rough sex before. Not quite like this, though. You can't breathe. You kick and wheeze and cry and claw at the hand around your throat and desperately gasp for what little air you can get in. He only lets go when you black out, lets you take a few breaths, then does it again. You're still so tight. New boyfriend must not have measured up, huh. It's raw and dry and it hurts. You whimper and you cry and you finally apologize like you should have days ago.

And yet, most importantly, you cum. See? You love him. So say it. Say it already. Come on. You do, you stutter, it's quiet and scared, but he smiles nonetheless.

It's ok. He knows you're sorry. He knows you didn't mean those awful things you said. You would never actually abandon him. You're different. Different. Special. Not like everyone else. You won't leave. You won't just leave him somewhere and disappear, you won't die out of nowhere, you won't kick him aside and leave him alone, you're the only person who won't. Different. That's why he loves you so much. You would never do any of that.

You just need help. You're so emotional, you're really not emotionally stable. Controlled by your wildly changing emotions. They make you say things you don't mean. Do things you don't really intend to do. Things you'll just regret if he didn't intervene and help you.

They make you vulnerable to other people. You're so easily controlled. You believe what they want you to believe. And that's dangerous. That could lead you to try to leave again. That's why you have to be helped. Kept away from becoming victim to your own impulses. The only way to do that is keeping you locked away. You'll come to understand with time. Appreciate it. Thank him.

You'll appreciate it because you're different. You'll never leave. You would never leave him even if you had the opportunity.

But maybe it's for the best that you don't have that opportunity to begin with.

#scheduled post #yan.txt #.ky

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maddiwrites · 3 years

Text

Let Me Go

Pairing: JJ x Reader

Summary: This was requested! Y/N still lives with the Cameron’s following the death of her brother, but she’s being held there against her will. After many failed escape attempts, Y/N finally gets out of Figure Eight, but she’s far from safe. (The request was long so I’m going to link it here so you can see the full summary of what anon wanted!)

Note: I’m sorry this took so long to get out!!! I literally had half of it written and then it all deleted and I’m so upset because my first attempt at writing it was better but oh well. I hope you like it. Again, sorry for the long wait!

Word Count: 3.8k

Warnings: MENTIONS OF DRUG ABUSE, CHILD NEGLECT, GUN VIOLENCE, ATTEMPTED SUICIDE. PLEASE DO NOT READ IF ANY OF THESE TOPICS TRIGGER YOU. PLEASE. SUICIDE HOTLINE: 800-273-8255

Masterlist

You weren’t always like this - sitting up in your unmade bed, staring at the blank wall in front of you like you could see through it, unshowered, trembling from your shoulders down to your toes, feeling empty from the inside out.

You forget what it’s like to be free. Following the death of your brother, you’ve been trapped like a rat in a cage. Figure Eight is no longer the luxurious part of the island to you. It’s filled with lies, manipulation, secrets, murder.

You’re still living at the Cameron’s. No, not living. Surviving. Ward refused to give his guardianship of you up. Some people wondered why - why would Ward want to live with the sister of a murderer? Yeah, that’s what they thought - that your brother killed Sheriff Peterkin and tried to kill Ward too. But you knew why.

Ward no longer treats you like a member of his family. He has you locked in your designated room on the third floor that’s basically only used as an attic and storage area. Your own personal prison. Because you know what he did - not only to your brother and his daughter but to your dad.

You felt like you were losing grasps of reality. You only knew fall was approaching because you could hear Wheezy talking about it to Rose outside your door. You guess the time of day by the sunlight through your window and the meals brought to your room.

Of course there have been times you tried to escape. You managed to run away a few times. The first time, you went straight to the police station and tried telling them that Ward was keeping you trapped in his home. Of course they didn’t believe you. Instead, they called Ward to come pick you up. He told the police that you’ve been experiencing delusions since the death of your brother. Without a second thought, they believed him and ignored your cries for help completely. The second time, you tried going to Kie’s, but the police found you first and brought you back to Ward’s now that they think you’re going through some kind of mental breakdown.

By now, you’re exhausted. You’re tired of fighting and arguing and screaming. You feel empty inside, craving some sort of release or embrace of comfort. You haven’t seen your Pogues in weeks, maybe months. You wonder if they still think about you. Do they blame you for leaving John B to go off by himself with Sarah? Do they hate you?

Not only is living inside an enclosed box hard enough, but dealing with the loss of your brother, friend, and father, is killing you inside. You can’t help but feel guilty that you weren’t with them. You and your brother were supposed to be partners in crime and you totally let him go off on his own. You feel like you abandoned him and that keeps you up at night.

Since your ways of coping are limited, you’re not proud to say you found an unhealthy way of relieving your pain.

When you were first locked up, you would scream and kick the door that hid you from the rest of the world, begging for anyone in the house to let you go. Never did it work, but one time Rafe got extremely fed up and raced upstairs to make you shut up. You didn’t know it, but Rafe was on the verge of a breakdown himself. His dad complete shut him out as he tried to fix the damage he caused. He assumed Sarah was dead. And Barry basically owned him, making him do all his dirty work. Maybe he deserved it, but he didn’t live a luxurious life either despite living in Figure Eight.

You took a couple steps back when you heard heavy footsteps approaching your door. Rafe quickly undid the locks and barged in so fast that he almost knocked you down.

“Oh my god. Do you ever shut the fuck up?” Rafe was breathing hard and quickly getting red in the face. You stumbled backwards, suddenly afraid of being alone with him.

You sniffled. “I need to get out of here.”

“You’re not leaving.”

“Please, Rafe. You got to get me out of here. Please!” You never thought you’d be here, begging Rafe of all people for help. Yet here you were. With no other choices left.

Rafe paced the room and raked his fingers through his hair. “You do realize you're not the only one going through something, right?”

You swallowed back your tears and scoffed at the Kook in front of you. “Seriously? Your family is keeping me locked in here like some kind of zoo animal! My brother is dead -”

“Sarah is too!”

“But that’s not my fault!” You screamed. You pointed an accusatory finger in his direction. “That’s yours!” Rafe froze and turned to look at you. You didn’t know where you grew the balls to keep going but you did. “I know what you did. I know what your dad is trying to cover up. And he’s using my brother to do it.” You saw Rafe’s adam’s apple bob up and down as he swallowed. “Why do you think your dad is keeping me locked in here?”

“Shit,” Rafe cursed. Now he knew why his dad gave him strict instructions to never come up to your room. He started shaking his his head and shaking in his skin. “I didn’t mean to - I - I - it happened so fast.”

You could go on and on about how Rafe would never be able to dig himself out of this hole. How he will never be able to convince you that he wasn’t guilty. But you didn’t. Because he’s the only one who could help you.

“Rafe, please,” You begged. “I won’t say anything. I just need to get out of here.”

Rafe sniffled back his own tears and fears and looked out the one window that looked out into the backyard of his home. He couldn’t let you go. He knew it was selfish, but he had to save himself.

“I can’t,” Rafe said.

A new wave of tears hit you and you felt defeated. You fell back on your bed and cried into your hands, hunched over above your knees.

“I’m sorry,” Rafe said, but his apology was as empty as you feel.

“Just go,” You rubbed your eyes hard enough to see stars.

You hear something light hit the bed next to you. “I know it’s not much. But this helps me get through all this messed up shit.”

When you didn’t look at him or whatever he gave you, he took that as a hint to leave and quietly left the room. You listened to each lock being fastened again, each one leaving a crack in your heart.

Rafe offered you something you should have never taken. A small baggie filled with fine white powder. You should have never even considered it. Drugs were never your thing. You wouldn’t even smoke with JJ when he offered a hit of whatever he was smoking. But the idea of anything taking your pain away enticed you.

And that’s how you ended up here. Broken, alone, and craving something only Rafe could supply you with. Literally. He came around every so often, sliding a small baggie under the door for you. It was the closest thing you and Rafe had to a friendship.

Today was particularly a bad day. It was dark and rainy outside and you remembered John B’s birthday should be quickly approaching. You missed him. God, did you miss him. You would do anything to hear his voice again or steal his clothes or go surfing in the ocean with him.

You trudged out of bed towards your dresser that held a faint line of coke left over from yesterday. With a one dollar bill, you sniffed the rest of it up your nose and blinked back the sting of tears that pricked your eyes after you did it. A rush of energy sparked up your body, through your toes and up to your head. You immediately felt lighter and that the world was spinning a little faster. But with that rush came a surge of emotions. You went from being sad to being angry real fast.

You hated Ward. You hated Shoupe. You hated this house. You hated Kooks. You hated yourself. You hated everything about the Outer banks. You just wanted to leave.

You find the closest thing to you, a small makeup mirror, and smash it against one of the locks on the door. You’ve done this hundreds of times and by now the door was scratched and bruised from your abuse, but you didn’t care. You didn’t feel the glass of the mirror slice into your skin as you continued to bang it on the metal lock. You didn’t care if Ward and the others heard you throwing another temper tantrum. You just wanted out.

When you felt the lock stumble to the side of the door, you froze in your place. You stared at the broken lock, wondering if this was all a dream or a hallucination from your high. “No fucking way,” You mumbled. You looked down at the door knob and repeated the same movements until the handle completely fell off and clattered to the floor.

You dropped the mirror and stuck two fingers through the hole in the door where the door knob use to be. While holding your breath, you slowly pulled the door open and couldn’t believe when it moved without any hiccup.

You never thought that you would get this far, and now that you were here, you didn’t know what to do. You felt scared. Cautiously, you stuck your head out to make sure no one was in the hallway. When the coast was clear, you tip toed throughout the house, listening to the eery silence that filled it. No one was home.

When you passed Rafe’s room, you stopped. You were out of supply and you needed more. Rafe owed you anyway, you told yourself. So you ransacked his room. Found about four more small baggies and stuffed them in your pocket before leaving.

As you walk through the halls, you pass Ward’s office and paused. It was open and unlocked. Even before all this shit happened, you never remember it being this way. You didn’t know what it was. Maybe it was the adrenaline from another escape attempt or maybe it was the cocaine, but you walked yourself into that office and looked around.

You cursed at all the accomplishments hanging on his wall, the trophies, and expensive relics of random shit. His desk was neat and orderly despite the major crime he was trying to cover up. You sat yourself in his chair, trying to imagine what it felt like to be him. Motherfucker probably felt like a king.

You went through his drawers, thumbing through random files you had no business looking through - most of it work related stuff and banking information. You tucked that one in your pocket for later.

Then you hear something thump against the drawer when you pull it out. A revolver. Small and silver. Cold against your fingertips. You breath hitched as you brought it up to your face. It felt like you were holding a bomb. An object that could change your life forever. Another fresh set of tears threatened to roll down your face but you shook them away. No. No more being sad.

You shut the drawer hard and walked out with a couple new items in your possession.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

The Pogues were spending another dreary day at The Wreck. The September sun might be out, but their spirits were down. Two of their best friends are dead and the other is trapped with two murderers. They were scared for you and have tried everything to get you back. They tried talking to the cops, they tried breaking her out. But each times the cops got in the way. They were running out of hope. At this point, they didn’t even know if they would ever see you again. They just hoped you were okay. They knew you tried escaping a few times and prayed that you would eventually get yourself out of there soon.

“JJ, you gotta eat,” Kie sighed as she watched JJ play with the fries in front of him. If anyone was handing it the worst, it was JJ. Both John B and Y/N were his best friends first. Hell, he was in love with Y/N. Had been since the sixth grade. One of his biggest regrets is that he never told you. Now he didn’t know if he ever would.

“’M not hungry,” JJ mumbled.

The door above the restaurant entrance rang as a couple of police officers walked in for their lunch break. The group of three glared at them as they walked in with their cocky stride and their hand resting on their tasers and guns as if everyone should be scared of them.

“Fucking cops can’t do their goddamn job,” JJ sat back in his seat and flicked one of his fries down on the table. He hated them. More than he ever had. He couldn’t believe these people took an oath to protect this county. Fucking cowards, all of them.

“Fucking assholes,” Kie said and watched her father approach them with a friendly smile.

Pope snapped up when an idea popped into his head. “Sarah’s sister.”

“What?” Kie’s brows furrowed.

“School starts next week,” Pope explained. “She’s starting high school, right? What if you tried talking to her? Maybe you can -”

Pope paused when he heard the sound of the police radios echoing off the walls from their belts.

“Code10-92. Runaway teen last reported on Baker’s Street. Proceed with caution. Last seen wearing black sports shorts and a white tank. Suspect may be armed and dangerous.”

JJ’s head snapped back to his friends with his brows pinched together. Could this be you? Could you have made it out again? But what did armed and dangerous mean? That didn’t sound like you.

Shoupe radioed back to the station. “On our way.”

The officers dropped ten dollars in the tip jar before charging out the door to go to their vehicles.

“We gotta go,” JJ stood up first and stuffed his phone and keys into his pocket. The other two nod and follow him out the door. If that call was about you, they wanted to find you before the cops did. “Okay. Kie, go home. She tried going to your house last time. Maybe she’ll try that again. Pope, go to Heyward’s. She trusts your dad. She might try to find him for help.”

“Where are you going to go?” Pope asked.

“Everywhere else.”

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

You trudged through your old home with heavy feet. Nothing in there felt familiar to you - like it belonged to you in another life time. You first went to your room and stared at the girl in the mirror. You didn’t recognize her. Bones sticking out of your skin, dark bags under the eyes, and cracked lips and dry skin.

Without thinking, you took the gun that’s still in your hand and smashed it against the glass, shattering it all around you.

Ignoring the stinging in your hands from the shallow cuts on your skin, you moved on to the next room. Your brother’s room. It looked like a tornado made its way through here. Everything was tossed and turned from the police and FBI ransacking it during their search for John B. Nothing felt like it was John B’s anymore. Nothing felt private. And that pissed you off.

Next you went to your dad’s office, somewhere you haven’t been since you found the compass. Even now, it felt like you weren’t supposed to be in here. If you believed in an afterlife, you would think your dad would be shaking his head at you.

The office looked like John B’s room did. Whatever belonged to your dad now belonged to the state. The only things left were random files and belongings the police didn’t find of importance. But they were important to you.

The first thing you found was a picture in a cracked frame of you, your dad, and your brother from when you were ten. Your dad was holding both of you as you blew out the candles on a birthday cake. Looking at the picture, you felt your heart being shredded apart. The picture only brought back pain and grief. You wanted that happiness back that ten year old you portrayed in that picture. But you can’t have it. Ever again.

A cry ripped through your throat as you chucked the picture across the room. From there, you went on a rampage, throwing and kicking anything that was in your way. You took one of the baggies out of your pocket and dumped it on the desk in front of you. Without any precision, you fixed the lines up with your finger and took a long whiff. You gripped the roots of your hair and tugged as you sobbed loudly and felt one of the biggest headaches explode in your brain.

You paced back and forth in the office with the gun held in your shaky hands. You were mumbling to yourself about your options and how horrible of a sister and daughter you were for leaving your family behind. You wanted to see them. You wanted to be with them and prove to them you never meant to abandon them.

You didn’t hear the door to the Chateau open or the sound of footsteps following your cries. It wasn’t until you heard his soft, delicate voice that you turned around and stared at your best friend with wide eyes and a startled expression.

“Y/N...” JJ breathed out. He didn’t see the gun yet. He just saw you, crying and broken and not looking like the girl he knew only a few months ago.

“What are you doing here?” He didn’t recognize your voice either. Hoarsed and scared. “You’re not supposed to be here!”

“The cops are looking for you! Okay? We need to get you out of here!”

“I’m not leaving!”

“What?” JJ looked at you like you grew two heads. “What are you talking about. We -”

“No! I said I’m not leaving! Agh!” Your hands flew up to your pulsating head and gripped at your hair again. The pounding in your head was excruciating and wouldn’t go away. Between the cocaine, your cries, and the exhaustion, you didn’t think it would ever go away.

That’s when JJ saw the gun and took a shocking step back. His hands immediately flew up in surrender and he gulped down his nerves. Now he knew why the cops had called you armed and dangerous. Probably because Ward reported a stolen gun. JJ never knew you to be a violent person. It wasn’t in you. You couldn’t even hurt a fly. Which meant you didn’t steal this gun to hurt someone else. But probably...

Then his eyes flickered to the desk where he saw the reside of white powder next to an empty baggie. Now he was petrified because he didn’t know how to get through to you - if he even could get through to you.

“Y/N, baby. Put the gun down.”

“No,” You shook you head. “No, no, no. I need to see them. I need to see my dad and John B!”

“Y/n...”

“I should’ve gone with them. I should’ve - I - I didn’t mean to leave. I’m so-sorry, John B. I’m so sorry.” You were a mess. Tears and snot and running all over your red and puffy face.

JJ kept looking between you and the gun. His only comfort was that he knew you didn’t know how to use it. You wouldn’t even touch the one he stole from Scooter Grubs. But that didn’t mean accidents couldn’t happen.

“I can’t do it anymore,” You continued. “I can’t go back there. I won’t. I won’t. I just want to see my dad.”

JJ took a hesitant step closer to you and nodded his head, keeping his hands up. “Okay. Okay. What if I helped you see your dad?”

“H-How?” You hiccuped. JJ didn’t know where he was going with this. He just knew he had to get that gun out of your hand. He took another step closer to you, but this one made you jump back. “No! No! Stay away!”

“Okay, okay!” JJ yelled back at you. “Hey. I’m here to help you, okay? Whatever you want to do.”

“I want to see them. I want to say sorry. I - I’m so sorry.”

“Y/N, they’re not mad at you-”

“I’m sorry, daddy, I -”

With you distracted, JJ took the opportunity to run at you and tackle you to the ground. He ignored the pang in his heart when he heard you cry harder, wondering if he hurt you, but he cared more about keeping you alive. He wrestled the gun out of your hands and quickly emptied the cartridge. He chucked the multiple pieces across the room and wrapped himself around your crumpled body.

“No! No!” You shrieked in JJ’s shoulder and gripped onto his shirt for dear life. “Please! Let me go!”

JJ held on to your crumbling body as you wracked with sobs. Exhaustion quickly took over you as the adrenaline slowly vanished out of your system. Your throat was on fire from all the crying and the screaming. Your chest felt empty and your lungs heavy. All you wanted was to close your eyes and never open them again.

JJ couldn’t hold back his own silent tears as they ran down his cheeks. He hated seeing you like this. And he hated even more that he didn’t know how to help you.

“It’s going to be okay,” He said as he brushed the hair out of your face. He kissed the top of your head with his soft lips and kept mumbling into your head. “You’re going to be okay. I’m never leaving your side again. It’s going to be okay.”

He didn’t know if he was trying to convince you or himself. He jus knew he had to make you believe it.

About ten minutes later, he felt your body relax against his. When he found you fast asleep, he pulled out his phone and texted Kie to pick the two of you up.

Until Kie got there, he stared at the delicate skin on your face with such admiration. Rage bubbled through this veins as the ideas of what you possibly went through in the that hell hole in Figure Eight.

He knew it was going to be a long road to recovery. He knew there was a lot of fixing that needed to be done. But he made a promise that he will never let you out of his sights again. Because today was a close call. And he never wanted you to be that close to death ever again.

#jj maybank fic #jj x reader #jj fic #jj maybank #jj maybank imagines #jj maybank x reader #jj maybank imagine #jj maybank one shot #jj mayback x reader #outer banks imagine #outer banks fic #obx imagine

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wandaswifeyforlifey · 3 years

Note

Hey could I request a Brie Larson x r where they meet at the set of Avengers endgame and they both have a crush on each other and their co stars make fun of them and they just blush and it's really

A/n: Thank you for requesting this! I try to write them within 24hrs of either the request being sent or me seeing the request so sorry if this is a bit later. I do most of my writing at like 12-5 am so some of it might be shitty lol. I love doing requests tho and will always try my best to make them work for your taste.

Word Count: 1048

Warnings: None really, just pure fluff

Ship: Brie Larson x Reader

"You better get up soon or you're gonna be late!" Called Scarlett from downstairs. Scarlett and you had met on the set of one of your first movies and quickly began to hang out more and more until you decided to be roommates. You had finished shooting Avengers: Infinity War about 2 months ago and were exactly 2 weeks into filming Avengers: Endgame which you were pretty excited about because you would get to film with some actors that you never had before.

"Coming!" You shouted back. Sadly, you weren't quite adjusted to the earlier mornings yet which definitely wasn't helpful considering you would be doing tiring work all day. You dragged yourself out of bed and headed downstairs for breakfast.

"Hey sleepyhead," Scarlett smirked at me as she cooked her omelette.

"Any news that could redeem my mood this morning?"

"Well… you are filming the 'female empowerment' scene today. You've got to be pretty excited to be acting with some new people, right?"

"Oh yeah! I completely forgot about that. I've got to admit Scar, that has perked me up a bit so thank you."

"Wow, you don't need to sound so surprised." She laughed.

You made yourself a coffee, had some cereal then went to have a shower. You put on a comfortable outfit considering as soon as you get on set you'll get your costume and makeup done.

Once you arrived you were swarmed with people filling you in on the scenes and telling you where you needed to go but they were all talking over each other so you understood nothing. Thank god I have my assistant, you thought to yourself.

*2 hours later*

You had your hair and makeup finished when you heard a knock on your trailer door.

"Come in!" You called while wondering who could possibly be seeing you when your assistant was on their break and you were already prepared to film.

"Hey, Y/n? I'm Brie. I just wanted to introduce myself before we started shooting."

You were just looking at her with pure adoration as the most beautiful woman you had ever seen stepped in.

"Y/n?"

"O-oh, yeah, sorry, hi." You cleared your throat because you noticed you were staring. "So I assume you're doing the all-female scene with me?"

You moved along your sofa so that she could sit down next to you.

"Yeah, actually and I'm super excited for it. I think it's brilliant to team up all the female superheroes."

"I could not agree more! But it sucks that Natasha isn't in it."

"Wait, she isn't?"

"No, I was chatting with Scarjo this morning, because we share an apartment, and she said her character wouldn't be in it."

"Oh are you and Scarlett, like, a thing? Because it would be totally fine if you were and I just didn't know your were interested in women and-"

"Hey, hey slow down," you laughed, "no me and Scar aren't a thing but I am interested in women."

"Me too! I don't really like to use labels because I find them too constricting though."

The conversation died down but not in an uncomfortable way, more in a content way. You stared into each other’s eyes until Brie said:

"Anyway. I should really get going. I haven't even got my makeup done yet." She spoke hurriedly and quickly left the trailer. You weren't sure how to feel about her sudden departure but deep down it hurt you a little. Why would she leave so quickly if we were having a nice time? Did she find it uncomfortable? I really hope the conversation ended positively in her books too, you thought.

You shot a couple of scenes before the all-women scene and took a break just before it to talk to Scarlett.

"Hey Scar, have you seen Brie? She came into my trailer to chat a bit and it seemed like we were having a really nice time but then she just left all of a sudden."

"Uh, no I don't think I have since our second scene but it sounded like you had a good time, eh?" She smirked and nudged you. You knew she noticed how concerned you were about Brie.

"Fine, maybe I thought she was really pretty and sweet but I don't know how she feels."

"Well from the glances she sent you during our first and second scenes I’d say she likes you back.”

“I never said I liked her, ok? I just said I thought she was amazing and charming and attractive and stuff.”

“That’s literally the same thing.”

You rolled your eyes.

“I need Y/n and Brie over here please? You guys are going to be opening the Female Avengers Unite scene so we’re just going to give you a little run-through,” shouted Joe Russo from across the set.

“Oo-ooh you enjoy yourself, Y/n.” taunted Scarlett. You playfully stuck your tongue out at her as you walked over.

*Once shooting was done for the day*

Yet again you heard a knock on your door as you were just finishing packing your stuff up to leave.

“Yeah?”

“It’s me, again,” announced Brie as she stepped in. This time though, she wouldn’t make eye contact with you and seemed to be rather nervous.

“You okay?”

“Yeah, it's just, um… so Scarlett told me how you felt after I left and I felt pretty bad so I just thought I should come back and apologise and tell you that it wasn’t your fault, it had nothing to do with you. I promise.”

“Oh no, you don’t need to apologise! I’m so sorry if I made you uncomfortable in any way. I absolutely didn’t mean to.”

You saw the heat rise in her cheeks.

“To be perfectly honest, I didn’t just come here to apologise. I came here to tell you the truth. Okay… I just need to get this off my chest. I think I have feelings for you.” She looked at you hopefully, only to have a blank stare in return. You weren’t sure what to say. You were so overwhelmed with excitement and happiness that you just stood up and hugged her. Burying your face in the crook of her neck you whispered, “I want to stay in this moment forever.”

If you want to be added to my taglist ask/message me!

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astaroth1357 · 4 years

Text

"Hi kinda new. I don't know if this is where requests go, but if you haven't done it yet can I request an MC sneaking into the boys beds?" ~irenethehotdog

The MC Sneaks Into the Brothers' Beds While They're Asleep

@irenethehotdog don’t worry, I found ya anyway. 😁 Sooo there was a kind of tender way I could have played this… but then there was a funny way. I hope you're alright that I went with the funny way. 😅 I got two bed requests that are kind of similar-ish but how I’m interpreting them makes them just different enough to warrant two different asks. Here's the first one!

Check out my Masterlist for more!

Warning: Comical nudity? Is that NSFW-ish?

Intro:

Sometimes everybody needs a little comfort, especially in the middle of the night. Any number of things could have drawn the MC out of their bed: bad dreams, nagging thoughts, just general fear of the darkness of Hell that surrounded them, but they decided to try to soothe their unease with the company of their demonic housemates! Wonder how that turned out for them..?

Lucifer

I mean, if you’re feeling a little alone at night, maybe a little scared, it would only be natural to want to seek solace with the strongest person in the nearest vicinity, right? ...Right?

To say it was maybe ill-advised to just climb into bed with Lucifer would be an understatement… Frankly, if the enchantments he had on his door weren’t specifically meant for Mammon then they might have ended up in a very compromised position. But somehow, they managed to infiltrate the demon’s private sanctuary and get right up to his bed.

Now, Lucifer is not a heavy sleeper. Not at all. He’s grown pretty accustomed to waking up at all hours of the night because of his brother’s antics, so he felt the shifting weight on his mattress almost instantly.

They probably weren’t expecting him to suddenly jerk upright and spin towards them, fireball in hand ready to lob at their face... but that’s what they got.

After realizing that it was just the human and not Mammon coming in to take his stuff again, he made them sit down in front of his fireplace while he gave them a looong lecture about personal boundaries and how it’s really not smart to sneak up on demons like that…

But he was still sympathetic to their sleep-deprived state so he offered them some tea and Devildom sleep remedies in hopes of getting them back to bed. ...Just not his. Back to your bed with you, MC.

Mammon

Mammon was their “babysitter.” Their protector. Their guardian. So why wouldn’t they want to go to him on a difficult night?

Getting into Mammon’s bed was hardly a challenge, sure they had to tiptoe through the garbage heap that made up his bedroom floor but it wasn’t Mission Impossible or anything…

What did catch them off guard was just how… not clothed he felt after they slid in under his covers. Like, pretty much wearing nothing at all. Not even a pair of courtesy boxers. 😓

It was their squeal as they flung themselves out of the bed that actually woke Mammon up. They had him ripping the covers off, ready to leap into action and everything, which definitely didn’t help matters. (Or maybe it did, depending on your point of view 🤷‍♀️).

Both parties pretty much turned into a cursing/blushing mess as he shot them embarrassed, rapid-fire questions while desperately trying to pull on some sweats. Meanwhile the MC stayed plastered up against the wall of his bedroom, answering him in equally defensive shouts.

Eventually, their fuss woke up Lucifer who was quick to send both of them back to their respective beds. The House teased them mercilessly for weeks… How were they supposed to know Mammon slept naked??

Leviathan

Levi might be a… strange choice for bedmate at first glance (he doesn’t really even sleep in bed, but a tub hardly meant for two people). However, there’s a certain level of approachability to him, isn’t there? Considering his own struggles with anxiety, maybe they thought he could relate…?

They tried knocking on his door first, thinking he might have been gaming, but there was no answer. When they walked in and found the otaku actually asleep for once, it seemed like their wishes might have actually been granted!

...But then came the actual trouble of trying to get into bed with Levi to start with. There wasn’t really an easy way to squeeze their body in past his because the tub was so dang narrow…

Any rational person might have just given up on the venture, but not MC. Whatever's possessed them to want to sleep with this awkward shut-in has a pretty good hold on them yet.

Lack of sleep might have been what gave them the bright idea to just try and lay on top of Levi veeerrry sooooftlllly…. Which is how the poor demon woke up to them halfway straddling his waist in the middle of the night.

His remarkably high-pitched scream woke up the whole dang House and the sheer amount of force he used when trying to jerk out of the tub toppled it over… Even after many apologies (and a trip to go buy a new tub), Levi still double locks his door at night to this day… 😓

Satan

Really an odd choice there, not going to lie. They’re well aware of the possibility that they could accidentally wake him and he maaaay not be the best waker (what being Wrath and all) but if it’s irrational worries that got you down, why not go to the most rational person in the House? Sounds like a perfectly logical decision, right?

That might have been what their half-baked disillusions were telling them on the way to Satan's bedroom but actually standing in front of the sleeping man was a whole other story. They felt crazy, genuinely crazy… But they still slipped in under the covers anyway.

Satan stirred almost immediately and turned to face them… but his eyes could hardly keep focus and the look of dopey confusion on his face could have honestly made the perfect screen background. "Huuuuuh…? MC…? What're you doin' 'ere…?"

They kind of had to hold in a laugh while they explained that they just wanted to sleep next to him that night. Satan beamed them an oddly serene smile and just nodded. "Okaaay…" With that he seemed to roll over to go back to sleep… but his mind caught back up with him before his drowsiness did.

"Wait a minute..." Ah shit….

Like Lucifer, Satan ended up giving them a pretty good lecture on boundaries and the like when he finally snapped out of his stupor. Thankfully he wasn't mad, just a little embarrassed that they had seen him like that. He offered them a good book or two to pass the time if they couldn't sleep, but sent them back to bed all the same.

Asmodeus

Asmo probably doesn’t get people coming into his bed with completely chaste intentions very often, but he’s by far the most emotionally in-tuned demon in the House. If they're after a little sympathy, best just go to Asmo right?

They weren't really sure what to expect when they walked into his room... Does Asmo sleep like a Disney Princess, hair and makeup done perfectly in defiance of all laws of beauty?

Does he sleep like a '60s housewife, with curlers in his hair and leftover chips of mud mask on his face?

Does he sleep like the god of all sex that he is, sculpted chest for the eyes to see and everything underneath laid bare like a honeypot of temptation??

The MC doesn't really get to know, because when they pulled back the covers to climb inside they were met by the sight of someone else's very naked ass taking up the spot where they thought Asmo should be.

They go back to their room willingly, dejected and maybe a little scarred... Apparently they were just too late to the party...

Beelzebub

Okay, everything about Beel screams “Hello! I’m a warm comforting teddy bear!”...aside from the hungry parts. It’s really not hard to see why they’d want to go to him if they’re feeling a little vulnerable.

They didn't worry too much about being quiet when they walked into the twins' room. Belphie could sleep through a rock concert and Beel wasn't too far behind him (as long as he wasn't hungry).

They figured that the tall twin wouldn't mind too much if they just crawled into bed with him… He had make a similar request of them before, it was only fair right?

As they were preparing their tired body for a good night's sleep, they gently pulled the covers back next to Beel but they probably weren't expecting to find so many food wrappers surrounding him… or bags of chips… or packages of cookies… or-

Apparently Beel had yet another sleep-eating run and this time he seemed to have brought the whole kitchen back with him. There was hardly enough room left for Beel anymore, let alone the MC!

Considering their options were to either wedge themselves between a havoc roast and a bag of jerky or just brave one more night on their own, they cut their losses early and went back to their own bed...

Belphegor

They didn’t have to know Belphie since Day One of being there to pick up on how hard he slept. The man was pretty much in a coma for most of the day and that included his nightly rests too. Would he even notice if they… per say… slipped into bed with him to get a little comfort from their nightmares? Surely, he’d stay asleep, right?

When they didn't see his sleeping form in the room he shared with Beel, the MC eventually found Belphie up in the attic room. His little hideaway with a plush-ass bed to boot.

They didn’t bother being quiet at all. They figured that Belphie could have stayed under for anything short of banging pots and pans in his ears so why try to mask their footsteps?

They never expected him to be awake. 😰

The moment they lifted the covers, Belphie struck like some kind of blanket crocodile! He grabbed them by the waist and dragged them into the spot of the bed right under him with a impish grin on his face.

Turns out they weren't the only ones having sleeping problems that night and as they felt the full weight of his worn out body settle in nicely up against theirs they knew that maybe, finally, they'd get a good night's sleep… 🤭

#obey me #obey me shall we date #shall-we-date-obey-me #obey me headcanons #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me leviathan #obey me satan #obey me belphegor #obey me beelzebub #obey me asmodeus #obey me requests #obey me scenarios

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kirschteinsj · 3 years

Text

Pinky Promises

Nanami x fem! reader

Warnings: nothing too much! maybe language but overall just a bunch of fluff and lovey dovey stuff

Word Count: 2.9k

Summary: Domestic Nanami and reader, just thinking about how much they love each other. sappy and cute stuff.

A/N: Hi! ^_^ Second time posting, I’ve had this one shot saved for a bit now! finally posting it lolz. I've noticed a lot of people have written domestic Nanami pics or drawn art, very glad society as a whole has this perception of him. it truly heals the soul I think. anyway, I hope u like this and sorry if there’s any grammar errors I wasnt able to catch U_U im thinking of doing a hc post next.... unsure hm, we’ll see ^_^!!

“I’m hooooome.” He says loudly as he steps through the apartment door, setting his briefcase down and taking off his beige coat. Putting down the grand kitchen knife she was using to chop up spinach, she rushed to the door with a smile and engulfed the tall blonde into a tight hug, saying hello. She took a deep breath, inhaling the soft scent of his cologne, the smell of something sour and musty soon taking over. Her face scrunched up and she let out a giggle.

“Oh god, Nanami, you stink, what did you go against today?”

“Nothing too bad. Just a grade 3,” He sighed “A smelly grade 3.” He sounded disappointed, probably because he knew he stunk too. Though the smell was horrendous, she still remained in his arms and he still held on just as tight.

“Are you tired? I was thinking of making dinner with you tonight but if you’re too tired I can-”

“No no. I’m fine. Just let me wash up and I’ll help out.”

“You sure?” She asked looking up towards him, questioning once more to reassure. He looked down and pressed a gentle kiss to the top of her head.

“I’m sure, dear.”

While he showers upstairs, she gets back to readying the ingredients so they could begin cooking their masterpiece as soon as possible. Tonight she had chosen chicken alfredo with a tossed salad; One could say it was her favourite, but saying that would imply that she would eat it when cooked and served by whomever. But to her, she would only eat it when it was him who had made it for her.

Y/n adored him. He adored her. To her, he was her light. She could simply not imagine life without him, not after he had come in and changed her in such a way. She never in a million years would have thought to be so in love with someone. To have known someone who cared enough to hear all about her day or listen to all her tangents, whether they made sense or not. Who listened to her talk forever about anything just so he could see the faint glow of passion in her eyes. Someone who remembered the small details in regards to the things she loved and the things she despised; Like how she hated the feeling of peanut butter on her fingers and how she absolutely admired the scent of fresh pages in a new book. Sometimes, she felt undeserving of him.

He admired her like no other. Never did he believe he’d be capable of opening up to anyone in such a way, at least not until she walked into his life. He could write a million lists, all full of everything he loved about her. The way she smiled cheekily at him after a witty remark, how she'd give every hug as if it was the last, the way she was oh so patient with him. It took him time to become vulnerable in the slightest, he just didn’t know how to do so without burdening her. She knew his job was hard, he’d told her. But rather than running away like he expected, she stayed with him right by his side. She refused to leave him over that. If anything, it made her want to stay more since she felt the need to be there for him. It felt like a punch to the gut but a good one. “So, is this love?” He had asked himself then. Nanami had someone who brought out the much more joyful side to him. At the end of the day, he knew he’d walk through the front door only to see her, arms wide open and with a big smile offering a cozy hug. She was his home. Sometimes, he felt undeserving of her.

Putting the final piece of broccoli into the container, she tidies any clutter and went back to their shared bedroom. Sinking into the bed and falling on it with a plush thump, she lets out a deep sigh mixed with some sort of a groan. She herself was exhausted from work too to say the least. She didn’t deal with curses or anything like that, but she did teach a class of 9 year olds which one could consider just as frustrating. Yawning, she checks her phone to read the time: 6:15 PM. Nanami hadn’t been in the shower for too long, a small nap wouldn’t hurt. Quickly, she settled for a little 30 minute nap. That way, she could get up soon enough to help him out in the kitchen and not abandon him to do everything on his own. She turns her phone off and slowly, her eyes shut.

…

Y/n slowly opens her eyes and notices a grey throw blanket placed on her, something that she doesn’t recall going to bed with earlier. “Must’ve been Nanami.” Grabbing her phone, she turns the screen on, wincing at the incredible blue light piercing into her skull. “Fuck.” she mumbles. Once her eyes adjust, she glances back at the screen for the time: 7:30.

“FUCK,” she says, voice croaking “I overslept.” With the speed of light, she leaves bed and runs down the hall to the bathroom to freshen up. She soon makes her way over to the kitchen silently, slightly ashamed and guilty. Y/n mumbles a whine with a frown, “He’s probably done making things now. I could have helped.”

The kitchen is filled with the delicate scents of sauces, cheese and herbs. She watches him from the door frame, admiring her boyfriend. He stood in front of the stove mixing at the sauce for the alfredo, which scent alone made her mouth water. Nanami seems to be in his own world, as he stands humming to himself softly, stirring the pot of sauce and adding in the broccoli and spinach, not seeming to notice y/n. With a final stir, he carefully sets the lid and turns to rinse his hands. Her gaze sits upon his figure, how his grey oversized shirt slightly clings to his shoulders and loosens as it goes down his body. Looking down, she noticed the bright red christmas pyjamas he had on, the ones with adorable little reindeers all over them. Grinning, she remembers how she had bought those for him. She purchased a matching set for the two of them and insisted on wearing them all day on Christmas last year. Nanami had responded to the idea with a stern “No” which left y/n in shambles. She didn’t expect him to agree, but hey, a girl can dream. However, on Christmas day, lo and behold, she had woken up to find Nanami sitting on the couch, watching the news with his reindeer PJs on. Immediately, she had attacked him with hugs and kisses and all Nanami did was sit there and accept them, secretly loving it the whole time.

A deep voice throws her out of her thoughts. “You know, it’s rude to stare, right?”

Y/n chuckles quietly and makes her way over, wrapping her arms around him from behind, snuggling into his back.

“I like to stare at you, you’re cute,” she breathes in his scent once again, “ah, you smell so much better now. Like the nami I know.”

“I am not cute. I am a grown man.”

“C’mon, you can’t possibly be saying that right now. Not while you’re wearing these pants.” She coos, gently patting his butt. He goes silent, refusing to rebuttal knowing that he’s lost. He leans against the counter, his front facing her. Though he didn’t say anything, y/n sees this as an open invite to his arms. The rope of his arms finds her waist this time, her arms in an embrace around his neck.

“Whatever, tell me, how was your day, hm?” He posed, changing the subject.

“Same old, yenno. The kids and I had a discussion today about drugs and safety. It was cute, hearing them rat out their neighbours for smoking cigs and talk about how yucky they thought alcohol is. It was… sweet. How was work for you, hon?”

“Shit.” He retorts, closing his eyes, “Work is shit.”

“Oh come ON, I’m sure it’s not always that bad, right? Say, how’s your friend doing, you know, the one who kinda looks like one of my makeup brushes! Isn’t he good company?”

“Yeah, if good company means having to deal with a nuisance to society on a daily basis then by all means, yes, Gojo is wonderful company.” He joked, loosening his grip on her and making his way over to the stove to check on his sauce. She follows, opening the first drawer and pulling out a silver spoon, “You’re so mean sometimes. I think he’s a great guy to be around! I met him once, such a flirt.”

He teases calmly, “If you love him so much, why don’t you get with him?”

Taking her spoon, she lowers it into the pot and brings it back up to her face, blowing on it carefully before she puts it to her lips to taste. “Hmm, I would. But I don’t think he’s as big as you. I’ll have to pass.” She smirked, putting the spoon into her mouth as he watched and sighed in disappointment.

He glares,“God, you’re something else.”

“I’m just kidding, babe.” Bringing her spoon down for another taste. He swats at her hand and she retreats it with a whine. “Don’t do that. You’ve tried it already, and will again when we get to eat.” He scolded tenderly, “Plus, you shouldn’t be given these privileges anyway. It’s not like you helped out or anything.” He smiled, teasing her.

“Nanamiiii, I’m sorry,” she whines, half laughing, “I promise, I was going to help! I just got a little bit sleepy and sort of lost track of time…” He turned over to her and lifted her face with a finger under her chin. Laughing, he delicately caresses her cheek, tapping it admirably with a curled finger. The blonde chuckles and looks her in the eyes, “I’m just joking with you, love. I know you’ve been tired lately, I can tell. Why haven’t you been resting?”

Her smile falls and she sighs. Y/n wrapped her arms around his waist and brought him into her, hiding her face into his chest. It was true, she was exhausted but she didn’t deem it to be anything so serious. Work was just heavy this past week from having to grade her students’ work in time for report cards. All she wanted was the best for her kids and was finding ways to get the kids out of their comfort zones enough to do well in class. That reminded her, Nanami also mentioned having a student of his own.

She takes her face out of his chest and glances upwards. “It’s just this week of work, I promise I’ll be back to normal soon. I’ve just been busy with lesson plans and activities, yenno. Anyway, speaking of students, how’s the one you’ve been assigned to?” She posed in a soft tone. Half smiling, he turned around to add the strained pasta to the sauce, scattering it into the pot.

“He’s special. Quite lively. And cheerful. He reminds me of you sometimes,” his voice strains as he stretches to grab the bowl of cooked chicken to finally add into the pot, finishing the meal, “He’s got potential.” Y/n beamed with happiness. Nanami really seemed to like this kid and if he thought you had potential, then it sure as hell meant you had it.

She lets out a squeal, “EEEEEEK!!! That sounds amazing! I’m so happy for you!” Nanami suppressed a laugh and rolled his eyes, “It’s not that-”

“This calls for a drink, don’t you think?” She babbled with excitement, “We should have some wine! Right?”

Grabbing her wrist as she skipped her way over to the bottle, he reminded her, “You have school tomorrow. You always end up having more than needed and struggle to wake up in the morning.” Y/n frowned at his words, to which he noticed and tried to fix, “Tomorrow’s Friday, you can drink plenty tomorrow, hm? I’ll drink with you.”

“Ugh, fine. You’re right. But you have to promise.”

“I promise you ca-”

“No! You have to pinky-promise.” She demanded, pouting as he stuck out her pinky finger.

His heart skips a beat. Was she always this cute? Her angelic eyes stare into his tired ones. Bottom lip poking out, awaiting Nanami’s pinky to interlock with her own. He knew she took pinky-promises very seriously despite her grown age. It was among one of the many petty details that he cherished. Something about this pinky-promise was enough for her to ensure trust onto someone, it made him laugh. Her naivety is what made her so kind hearted, what allowed her to see the best in people. He felt that this naivety is why they’re together to begin with. He didn’t ever think she’d give him a chance. He reminisced of their first few encounters. The way she did her hair back then, the way she dressed, her shy smile and how she’d look at the floor whenever she’d blush. Maybe it was her timid nature that made him fall head over heels for her. Or maybe it was her generosity. Perhaps her beauty. He was unable to simply confine the reasoning for his infatuation with just a few traits. She grew overtime, more comfortable and less shy, she was more confident around him but he knew he could still make her blush so badly that she’d have to hide her face from him. He enjoyed their banter, her company. He felt it was luck. Or maybe it was fate. Who knows. He didn’t want to think so much about it. He wanted to live in the moment, adore her in this present time. In that instance, he felt the strong urge to kiss her. And so he did.

The kiss was short and sweet, yet full of an unfathomable amount of love. It took her aback, she didn’t quite see it coming. She too stood in the present moment, then and there, cherishing the man she loved.

His lips leave hers and he extends the smallest finger on his hand, declaring, “I pinky-promise.” And a ginormous grin washes over her face. In a whisper, she squeals and scoops her arms around his torso, resting her head onto his chest. They stay like this for a while, not too long really, but to them it felt like an eternity being in each other’s affectionate embrace. He goes to speak and she feels the vibrating boom of his voice make his way up from his chest.

“I love you.”

She sighs, “I love you too.”

Turning her head, y/n smoothly gets on her tip toes and clasps her arms around his neck, giving it a tender kiss and attempting to make a trail leading up to his sharp jaw. Catching onto her tactics he laughs, putting his big hand against her face and pushing her back.

“Seriously?” He chuckles, “You couldn’t wait till after dinner? Come on, take out the plates.”

“Wait for what? I was just kissing you! You’re so dramatic, Nami.” She lies, playing innocent. She knew damn well what she was trying to do. She wasn’t going to admit to it though. Taking out the plates and utensils, she readied the table.

…

After dinner and meaningless conversation, the two lovers tidied and headed towards their room. “Do yo wana wah a mohee tomowwow nie?” Y/n proposed from the bathroom as she brushed her teeth. He perks his head up, confused, “Do I want to what?” She spat into the sink and rinsed her mouth, repeating her question.

“I said, do you wanna watch a movie tomorrow night? Like at home? There’s this documentary I saw on Netflix, it looks really good! It’s crime related.”

“That sounds fine with me. Though, that’s only possible if you don’t end up drinking too much. I always have to get you to sleep early when you drink.” He states nonchalantly, nose poked into a thick book. She rolls her eyes and smiles, “I promise I won’t drink all that much.” Shifting his book to the opposing hand, Nanami silently takes his pinky finger and holds it out to y/n. She snickers and reciprocates.

“You’ve now pinky-promised. Don’t break it, y/n.”

“I never do.”

The nightstand lamp illuminates the room with a soft yellow glow. Shadows of objects on the nightstand hang on the walls. Laying in bed on her phone, y/n turns over to Nanami, who was still reading his book. “Nami, come lay next to me, I wanna cuddle. Please?” Her voice faint. He looks down at her and puts his book away immediately. He could use a cuddle too. Bringing himself down, he lays on his back, y/n closing the gap between the two. Their legs intertwine, her arm and head resting on his chest while one of his hands rested on her bum, the other dotingly playing with her hair. Neither of them spoke a word for a while. Until y/n broke the silence.

“So, were there no other pairs of pants you had left to wear or-”

“Please, be quiet.”

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noladyme · 3 years

Text

As It Should Be - A Raymond Smith One Shot

Raymond is the perfect gentleman, with a perfect home, and very settled habits. One of those habits had become to cancel dates at the last minute; and in stead spend the night in with his girl.

Now, she's had enough, and decides to challenge him on it, doing everything she can, to get on his nerves. The result is much more interesting than she'd anticipated.

Hell hath no fury like a girlfriend of a gentleman gangster, who has been stood up one too many times.

Ray had given me a key a few months before, during dinner at our favorite steakhouse – his backyard. We’d been celebrating 6 months together, and he’d handed me a small wrapped box, with a pretty bow tied around it. He’d most likely used a ruler to get the paper and the ribbon exactly the sizes he needed, to make it look as perfect as possible. His perfectionism both drove me mad, and turned me on immensely.

My hands had been shaking, partly in fear – I was no near ready for any diamond rings – but Ray had given me a slight smile. “Don’t worry, darling”, he said. “Nothing near as serious as you’re worried it might be”. “You telling me we’re not serious, Raymond?”, I replied snarkily. “Just open it, love”, he said.

Inside the tiny packet lay a golden key. “It’s for the house”, Ray said. “I want you to be able to come and go as you please… Just don’t try to break in to any locked freezers”. I raised a brow at him. “Is this because you don’t like my flat?”, I asked. “I know you have issues with council estates…”. “You spend most nights here anyway”, Ray said. “Look, I’m not asking you to move in… Unless you want to of course”. I laughed at his amused expression. “You wouldn’t last a week with me in the house!”, I said. “First time I use the wrong glass for red wine, or leave water stains on the bathroom mirror; you’ll go mad”. Ray blinked – his little adorable tick. “No, I won’t”. I tugged at his beard, and smiled. “Yes you will”.

Ray pressed the key into my hand. “Just… keep this, alright? The house feels more like a home when you’re here”. I leaned towards him, and placed a soft kiss on his lips. “I didn’t get you anything…”, I blushed. “That’s alright”, Ray smiled. “You can give me head in the shower later”.

I had used the key on more than one occasion – admittedly preferring Ray’s more comfortable bed to my own lumpy mattress in my one-bedroom rental. And both Ray and me had enjoyed when I’d been waiting for him in it, naked and ready to help him relax after a tense day of whatever it was Mickey had him doing all over London. Tonight, my plan was different.

Ray had cancelled four dates in a row, just as I was about to leave the house. He’d call just as I would be about to put on my shoes. “I’m so sorry, love. Work ran late. I’ll have Bunny pick you up, drop you at the house, yeah?”. And once again, I’d end up waiting for Raymond in his house, in my pretty dress; until he’d show up – an hour later – with a bouquet of roses or a pair of earrings too expensive for the queen, takeout from some fancy restaurant; and an apologetic smile on his face.

I was beginning to wonder whether Ray didn’t want to be in public with me. I wasn’t the kind if woman he’d usually meet while wining and dining lords and ladies all over England. Maybe my teacher’s salary and fondness of things like public transport – he’d practically begged me to let him get me a car, which I’d declined vehemently – was becoming too lower class to him. I decided to challenge him on it – and maybe, just maybe, I wanted to punish Ray just a little bit, for cancelling our plans for the hundredth time.

This time, I was ready. Ray called, on cue, just as I was about to slip on my shoes. “I’m so sorry, love…”, he began. “It’s alright, Ray. I understand”, I said. “I’ll pick up dinner on the way”. Ray paused for a moment. “I don’t want you waiting in some restaurant alone”, he said. “Don’t worry, babe. Bunny will be there”, I replied. “Tell you what. You can pick up the wine”. “Ripasso?”. I heard the smile in his voice. “You know me, I’m not choosey. Just make it red”, I said. “See you soon”, Ray said, and with after a few more warm words, we said goodbye, and hung up.

Bunny gave me large grin as I jumped into the back seat of the large Mercedes, dressed in leggings, a hoodie, and a smug expression. “Hello, Bunny”, I said. “We need to make a stop”. “Of course, miss. Where?”, he asked. “McDonalds drive-through”, I said. Bunny’s smile became impossibly bigger. “Ray is in for it, isn’t he…?”, he asked. “You fucking know it”, I smiled, and leaned back in my seat.

Once inside the house, I began my preparations. My first stop after kicking off my shoes and setting down the bag of food in the kitchen, was in Rays closet. I checked to see Fletcher wasn’t hiding in it, as he’d done once before; and then went through the collection of shirts. I chose a white Armani, shrugged of my hoodie; and put it on. For an extra touch, I left the closet door open, mussed up the sheets on the bed, and threw the duvet and a pillow on the floor. Next up was the bathroom. I opened the lid to the toilet, washed up – making sure to spray some water on the mirror – and dropped the towel on the floor, once I’d wiped my hands.

I dropped my hoodie on a chair in the hallway, and made my way to the kitchen. Being a big fan of Rays espresso machine, I made myself an americano, poured it into a tea mug – drank half of it – and left the mug in the sink. I took out two plates, carrying them over to the coffee table. I chose the actual silver silverware from the drawer, and put it by the plates.

With a few final touches, and after touching up my makeup, I sat down in one of leather recliners, and put my feet up – waiting for Raymond to come home. It wasn’t long before I heard his keys turn in the lock, and I readied myself for a potential catastrophe. I heard his footsteps in the hallway, and got up to stand. “Darling?”, he called out. “Something smells… deep fried”. I heard him stumble for a moment, probably over my sneakers on the floor. “I’m in here”, I said, and went to meet him in the kitchen – knowing his usual route when he got home.

Ray looked as dapper as ever, in a tweed jacket, a vest, and a pair of dark grey slacks. He looked mildly annoyed about having tripped over my shoes; and was holding a bottle of wine in one hand, and a wrapped box from Selfridges. When he saw my relaxed attire, he looked confused.

“I love when you wear my shirts, but that’s…”. “Armani. I know", I said, and tugged at it. “It’s very comfortable“.

Ray shrugged, put down the wine, went over to slip an arm around me, and kissed me deeply. I was finding it difficult to keep my composure, as I stood pressed against his firm frame; and inhaled his scent. “I brought you something… to apologize", he said, and handed me the beautifully adorned box. “You didn’t have to, Ray", I said, and suppressed the urge to open it; in stead tossing it on the kitchen island. He looked at me with narrowed eyes, and I kissed his cheek. “Dinner’s ready. Go wash up". Raymond stole another kiss, and squeezed my bottom, before going back out into the hallway, and towards the bathroom.

“Is this your sweater in the hallway?”, Ray called out to me, as he passed it. “Probably”, I responded. “You don’t usually wear hoodies”. “You could hang it…”, he said. “Never mind, I’ll do it”. I smiled to myself, imagining his grumpy face as he hung my 15 quid hoodie, next to his own Burberry trench on the coatrack.

Once Ray returned from the bathroom, I was sipping some of the delicious red wine, from one of the cognac glasses. Ray didn’t say a word about the state I’d left his bathroom in, but he did twitch at my choice of glass. “Something wrong?”, I asked sweetly. “Nothing at all”, he said, and tried for a smile. I handed him a glass of his own, and he struggled with not holding it in his palm, as he would have, had it been filled with brandy. I clinked my glass to his, and smiled. “Everything alright with work? What made you late?”, I asked. “A meeting with some people… Nothing that would interest you”, Raymond said, and turned towards the counter, noticing the half full mug of coffee in the sink. “I’m happy you’re making yourself at home”, he grunted, and peeked out the corner of his eyes at me. “Well, you told me to…”, I said, and linked my fingers with his.

Rays eyes twinkled, and he leaned in for another kiss; parting his lips, to deepen it. His tongue probed for entry to my mouth, but I pulled back. “Let’s eat”, I said, and walked towards the living room area. “I’ll set the table”, Ray said. “I already did”, I smiled. He looked confusedly at the dining table. “We eating outside?”, he asked. “No. I set us up over here”, I said casually, and threw myself on the couch; patting the seat next to me. Ray looked flabbergasted. “I have this lovely dining table…”, he tried. “Bring the wine”, I said, ignoring his words.

Ray sat down next to me, and filled my glass. I picked up the paper bag of food, and began distributing burgers and fries on the plates. “I got chili cheese tops and chicken wings as well”, I said. “Eat up”. I picked up the knife and fork, and began cutting into my burger. “That’s a … salad fork”, Ray said, his voice choked. “There’s salad in the burger”, I shrugged. Ray looked at me incredulously, as I dipped a few fries in my ketchup, and then – deliberately – let some of it fall and stain his shirt I was wearing. “Woops”, I said, and grabbed a napkin, beginning to dab at the stain. “Fuck, darling. That’s dry clean only!”, Ray sighed. “I’ll get it out… maybe some bleach”, I said. His eyes widened.

“What’s going on with you?”, he asked. “Nothing", I said, feigning confusion. I took a big bite from my burger, using the silver salad fork to put it there. “Yum". Ray took the fork from me, just as I was about to take another bite. “What are you doing?", I frowned “Why are you testing me?”, he demanded. “I haven’t the slightest idea what you mean, babe", I said. “I’m just enjoying a date with my darling”. “In a stained Armani shirt, and leggings?”, Raymond said. I shrugged. “It wasn’t like we were going out anyway". “I had reservations at…”, he began. I blew a raspberry at him, catching him completely of guard. “Like there was ever a chance we’d use those", I said.

Raymond’s eyes finally lit up in understanding. “You’re angry that I was late, and we had to change plans tonight". “Tonight?”, I sneered. “Try the last… five dates we were supposed to go on". Ray pinched the bridge of his nose, and took a deep breath. “I see… This isn’t how I’d seen the evening going either, love". “Sure it was", I said, getting up from the couch with my cognac glass of wine in hand. I took off my socks, and walked over towards the door to the yard. I opened it, and threw my socks outside. Ray got up behind me, in shock. “Its fine, really. I don’t mind the fact that you don’t want to be seen in public with me. That I’m not worth enough to be taken out somewhere nice”. Using a chair as a step, I walked onto the dining table, and made a little catwalk back and forth. Ray looked equal parts terrified, astounded and enraged. “This way, I can show you how truly at home I feel here".

“Please get off the table", he croaked. “No”, I said, taking a sip of my wine. “Please", Ray tried again, obviously trying to control himself. “Not happening", I said. I stopped my leisure stroll back and forth, and looked Raymond square in the face. We were both quiet, and it was like a standoff in one of those old western movies. “Get off the fucking table, or else…”, Ray said, patience clearly wearing thin. “Or else… what?”, I challenged him.

Though enjoying my little game, I was also beginning to fear that I was digging myself into a bigger hole than I could get out of. Raymond’s eyes were on fire, but I thought I could see something behind the rage – something quite intriguing. I decided to keep my game going. Either Ray would kick me out on my ass, or something else would happen; something much more fun. Either way, I’d have some sort if closure. “I will spank you six ways from Sunday", he said. I hadn’t expected that. “Is that a promise?”, I asked, not sounding remotely as confident as I’d hoped to.

As I lifted the glass to my lips again – all the time keeping my eyes on Ray’s – I shifted my fingers, so that I was palming it in my hand. Ray blinked again, twitching from my teasing.

Suddenly he made a jolt forwards, as if launching himself at me, and I almost fell of the table as I stumbled backwards. Looking down myself, I realized some of the red wine had splashed onto his shirt. “You made me spill my wine!”, I said. “Last fucking chance, darling”, Ray said, walking towards me; almost on the prowl. “We gonna dance now?”, I said. I walked to the middle of the table again – downed my drink – and used my toes to push the bowl of fruit towards the edge. Ray caught it just as it toppled over.

He walked over to the kitchen island, put down the bowl, and calmly took of his jacket; before rolling up the sleeves of his shirt. He walked over to the head of the table, cleared his throat; and set down his palms on it – his eyes dark. “Right. This is going to hurt me more than it will you”, he declared, before pouncing on me; catching my legs, and throwing me over his shoulder. He gave me a hard spank over the ass. “Will you behave now?”. “No!”, I yelled. He set me down, and turned me around by the shoulders; forcing my upper body down over the table, with a hand pressed down between my shoulder blades. I could honestly say I’d never been more turned on in my life.

“I asked you nicely, and you still acted like an imp”, he said. He used his free hand to pull down my leggings, exposing my panty-clad bottom; and as I kicked my legs, he removed them completely. “Impish behavior demands punishment”. He delivered a hard smack on my left cheek. “Ow!”, I yelled, trying to wrestle myself away from him. “You’re spanking me like a child, now?”. Ray leaned to hold me down with his whole arm. “Well, if you’re going to behave like a child…”, Ray said, and spanked my right cheek. His hand rubbed over my skin afterwards, almost soothingly. “You’re the one who should be punished!”, I growled. “You’ve been cancelling all our plans lately”. Ray spanked me on the left cheek again. “That’s what you’re doing? Punishing me?”, he asked. He gave my right cheek another smack. “When all I’m doing is keeping you happy… getting you flowers and presents; telling you to make yourself at home in this nice house… Oh, no; love. I’m a fucking prince to you”. “Yeah, I’m really feeling my princess Di fantasy here!”, I scoffed.

Raymond began spanking both my cheeks in turn. I let out yelps and whimpers at each hit; as they sent signals straight to my core. “This is for the silverware (smack)… This is for throwing the towel on the floor (smack)… For the glasses (smack)… For leaving your shoes about for me to trip over (smack)… And this (smack), is for walking all over my dining table on your bare feet (smack)…”. I was struggling in vain to get free; and at the same time wanted this torture to never end. His fingers ghosted my covered folds, and I drew in a short breath. Ray pulled me up to stand, and raised a brow, as he looked down at me. “Now, will you behave?”. “Not in a million fucking years”, I said.

Before he could catch me, I sprang towards the kitchen island, crawling on to it. Ray caught my ankle, but I managed to get free; and got down on the other side – the island now a barrier between us. I smiled wickedly. I grabbed the half full mug form the sink, and held it up as to spray the coffee at him. “Careful, Raymond. I know how you dislike getting dirty”, I smirked. “I’ll show you how fucking dirty I can get, babe", Ray growled, and sprang over the island, making me drop the mug back into the sink in pure shock.

Ray pulled me into his arms, pinning my arms down at my sides, and attacking my lips with a feverish kiss. I didn’t struggle now; my body responding by completely giving in to lust. After a moment of passionately kissing me, Ray let me go; and ripped open the shirt. “You ruined my shirt”, he growled, and pulled it off me; leaving me in my bra and panties. He was still impeccably dressed himself. The mix of his warm body and the cool fabric of his vest pressing against my naked skin was heaven. I began leaning against Ray, and bit my lip with a smirk. He shook his head. “You want to use things the way they’re not supposed to be used? Fine. Get your ass on that counter”.

My jaw dropped. Sex with Raymond was always thrilling, and we’d enjoyed these sessions, not only in his – and a few times my – bed, the backseat of his car, and in the shower; but also, one time in a fitting room, where Ray had come with me to help chose a dress for a job interview at a private school. I made the mistake of bending over with my back to him; and suddenly found myself pressed against the wall, with Ray covering my mouth with his hand, to muffle my moaning as he screwed me into oblivion. I hadn’t gotten the job, but I did gain a memory for life. In spite of this, we’d never had sex in his kitchen. Ray had this obsession with keeping everything in his home as it should be, and I had a feeling that it might be because he needed to control at least some things in his otherwise quite unpredictable life.

I gave myself a second to feel bad for having disrupted his perfect home base; before he lifted me up to sit on the kitchen island. He snatched a pair of scissors out of a drawer, pulled out the fabric of my panties, and cutting through them at my hips. “You bought me these!”, I said. “I don’t care”, he growled. “I’ll get you some new ones”. He ripped the ruined panties of me, and looked down at the apex of my thighs. The cool wooden surface against my bottom made the sting from the spanking subdue, and I shifted to get more comfortable. The moment seemed to drag out forever, as Ray just looked at me. He took a deep breath. “Don’t move”.

Ray left the room for a moment, and then returned; having poured himself a proper glass of probably very expensive scotch. Leaning back against the counter opposite me, crossing his legs; he took a sip of the drink, and commenced his staring at me. “I have to say, that is the most appetizing piece of meat laid out in my kitchen in a long time”, he said. “Ray…”, I said, feeling myself melt under his gaze. A wicked smile ghosted his face, when suddenly his phone buzzed in his pocket. He leisurely took it out, and picked up the call.

“Yes?... Handled it this morning. Meeting’s set up for tomorrow afternoon… No, you didn’t interrupt anything, boss. Just preparing dinner…”. He began strolling calmly around the kitchen, and I didn’t dare move. “I was about to ask her, but she’s a bit preoccupied at the moment… I’m sure she’d love to, count on us…”. He took another sip of his scotch, and then held the glass to my lips; seemingly for me to taste. As I opened my mouth, he pulled the glass back, and dribbled some of the amber liquid down my chest instead. I frowned, and parted my lips to speak; but Ray set down the glass, and held a finger to my lips. “Will we be needing extra security…? I’ll take care of it… Yes, of course, I’ll wait…”.

With the phone still to his ear, Raymond licked the trail of scotch on my skin, from my collarbone, down to the top of my breast. My breath hitched at the sensation of his hot tongue. Just as he was about to move the cup of my bra down, to go for my nipple, he stepped back again. “Yes, I’m here… Did he…? Well, he’s a right cunt, but consider it handled… I’ll keep you in the loop. Goodnight, boss. Give my best to Rosalind”.

He hung up the phone, and put it on the counter next to me. His fingertips travelled over my thighs; avoiding my warmth. “Sorry about that, but you know how it is”, he said. “Now where were we…?”. “You were wasting a 1000-pound scotch on my tits”, I jeered. “1500”, Ray said. “And I wouldn’t call it wasted”. He took another sip of the scotch, but before he swallowed it, he put his lips to mine; letting me have a taste. “What was that about you not being worth enough? I usually don’t baste my meat in expensive whiskey”.

He put his hands on my ass, and made me scoot forwards on the counter. His fingers travelled down my belly, and finally met my folds; dipping in between them. I drew in a ragged breath, as he slid his fingers up and down. “Let’s have a taste”, he said, and removed them again, putting them into his mouth. “Sweet, bit tangy, perfectly moist”. He dipped his fingers again, this time letting one of them dip in to the knuckle, and crook upwards. I threw my head back, and closed my eyes. He removed the finger again, and I groaned. “Quit with the games, Ray”, I complained. “You started this, love”, he said. “I’m just finishing it”. “Then, bloody finish it!”, I retorted.

Raymond stepped back, corrected his glasses, and clicked his tongue chidingly. “Now, now. No need to be greedy. We’ve got all night. As you said, dinner plans are out the window”, he said. “Fine. I wasn’t hungry anyway”, I said. He raised a brow at me. “No? Let’s see if we can wake that appetite”. He thrusted two fingers into me, and used his free hand to get me to lie back; before moving it down to brush against my clit. “Please…”, I whimpered. “Please, what? Forgive me, Ray? I’ll never be a brat again, Ray?”. He thrusted his fingers upwards, touching my sensitive spot inside, as he began rubbing circles on my nub. “No…”, I said, not wanting to give in. I struggled to keep my composure, but as Ray began thrusting harder, and stroked deliciously at me, I was soon too far gone to speak. “I’m…”. “That’s what I thought”, Ray said calmly. I clambered to hold on to something, put found nothing but a rolling pin; which fell to the floor, making a clanking sound to accompany my own cry of passion, as I came.

Ray gently withdrew his fingers, wiped them of in a handkerchief from his pocket; and took my hand for me to sit up. “All good?”, he asked, his face not giving away an ounce of emotion. His pants were giving away enough, though; as the bulge on the front of them had grown quite a bit. “Living room”, he ordered, and as I got off the counter, and walked towards the door, he turned around, and quickly washed the mug in the sink. “Tea mug for coffee. Honestly…”, I heard him mutter.

As I stood in the dimly lit living room alone, waiting, I shivered from the chill entering through the still open door to the back yard. “Ray?”, I called out. “Coming, darling”, he responded, and he came through the doorway; walking over to the patio door, and closing it. He gestured at me to get over to the couch. “Knees”. He was carrying the whiskey-glass, and refilled it. “Don’t I get one?”, I asked. “No… I said; knees”. He sat down on the couch, legs spread casually, and looked on, as I got down on my knees in front of him. The elitist machismo in the room, was thick enough to carve with a butter-knife. “How’s the appetite?”. “Getting there”, I admitted. “Well, bon apetit”, Ray said, and gestured towards his crotch.

I rested my elbows on his thighs, and unbuttoned his pants; pulling down the zipper. Ray made no move to help me unwrap his erection, so I went on to pull down the elastic of his boxer-briefs as well. He let out a silent grunt, when I wrapped my hand around him; and I smiled at his respond to my touch. I began stroking the velvety skin on his hardness; and Ray took a sip of his drink as he watched me. I stuck out my tongue, and flicked the tip over the sensitive spot under the head; before flattening it, and sucking him into my mouth. Ray tasted as good as he looked and smelled. A perfectly expensive taste, with an undertone of something animal – dangerous even. I bobbed my head up and down, hollowing my cheeks to make my pull on his penis tighter. Putting my hand into his bowers, I managed to get his testicles over the elastic as well. This made me able to massage them gently; rolling them in my palm the way I knew he liked.

My vagina was still sensitive from Rays former treatment, so when he leaned forwards, ran a hand down my back – between my cheeks – and slid a finger between my folds; I almost came from just that second of contact. Ray sat back again, and continued his viewing of my work on his cock. “Don’t stop on my account”, he said. I made a swallowing movement, and another stifled groan came from him. I hummed slightly; making vibrations to add to the sensation. I added pressure to his testicles, and felt them tighten in my hand. Apparently, Ray was even more impacted by my treatment, than his face gave of. I released him from my mouth with a pop, and smiled sweetly up at him. “Enjoying yourself, Raymond?”, I asked. He cupped my chin. “You know I am, darling”, he smiled. “But it seems to me, you are as well”. I nodded, and bit my lip.

I went back to sucking him off, while he finished his drink. I could tell he was struggling not to grab on to me, so I took his free hand, and put it on my head. At first, he simply ran his fingers through my hair; but then held on to it, and began controlling my movements. I let go of his testicles, and held on to his thighs, as I let him take charge of me. Ray led me to take him shallowly; then pressed me as far down as I could take him. After a few minutes, he couldn’t keep quiet anymore, and let out audible grunts and gasps, accompanied by a series of fuck, babe and that’s perfect, darling. With one final deep push, his cock twitched; and he came in my mouth – holding me there until he was completely finished. He let go of me, and I sat back on my heels; swallowing.

Ray took a moment to calm his breathing, before getting on his feet, and helping me to stand in front of him. He put himself back into his pants, and led me in front of him, towards the bedroom. I knew we’d end up there at some point; and suddenly felt a chill down my spine, when I remembered the state, I’d left the room in. Before he could open the door, I stopped him. “Ray… Uhm…”, I started. “What?”, he asked. “I sort of left a mess in there… The closet…”. “Fletcher wasn’t in it again, was he?”, Ray growled. “No, nothing like that…”, I said. He gently pushed me out of the way, and opened the door; stepping inside, and turning on the lights. “The fuck…”, he said from inside. I moved up behind him. “At least I didn’t spill ketchup on anything…”, I tried.

Ray began removing his vest and shirt, not saying a word all the while. I was worried – and at the same time hoping – that I was in for another spanking. I went to sit on the bed, and heard Ray open his belt behind me. “No", he said calmly. I turned to face him, and saw he was shedding his pants and boxer briefs. Undressed, Ray was no less regal. He might as well be wearing a dinner jacket, and holding a glass of port. As it was, he was naked as the day he was born, standing proud and fit. I sent a thankful thought to his personal trainer; or, Coach, as I knew him. Ray put his clothes in the hamper, removed his glasses, and placed them on the dresser in the spot he always did.

“Seeing as you’ve thrown half the bedding on the floor, we might as well start there”, he said. “But the bed is right there…”, I said, slipping an arm around his torso. I ran my hand up his chest, and back down, running my nails through Rays pubic hair – as always, well groomed, and blonde as his head. He raised a brow at me, and caught my wrist, as I was about to take a hold of his penis. “And the red wine glasses were right within reach too, but you still chose something else", he said. “You asked for this, love. Its upside down-day".

With a swoop of his arm, Ray had me on the floor, and he patted my hip to make me roll onto my stomach. Once there, he gave me hard smack over my bottom. “Lift", he ordered, and when I did, he took the pillow; putting it under my hips, so my ass was raised in the air, and my chest against the duvet covered floor. I looked back over my shoulder, and saw Ray kneeling behind me. The view of my bottom and wetness had made him hard again, within record time; and he stroked himself a few times, while he probed my entrance with his fingertips. Stroking my cheeks with his free hand, he then gave me one more hard spank. With a firm hold on himself and one of my hips, he pushed into me; bottoming out with the first thrust.

“Oh, my… fuck!”, I cried out. Ray stroked my back up and down gently, and then spanked me again. “I thought my spanking was over”, I whimpered. Ray leaned over me, to kiss my neck, and speak into my ear. “Why would I stop, when you keep making those delicious little squeaks every time I do?”. He smacked me one more time, and I whimpered loudly. “There we are".

He began moving his hips, the blunt tip of his cock rubbing perfectly against my front wall. I rolled my lower body, and with the pillow under my hips, my back was perfectly arched to make the sensation of Ray inside me more intense than ever. Ray kissed and nibbled at the sweet spot on my neck, as he moved in and out of me. “You taste better than a Big Mac, any day of the week”, he chuckled. His warm breath against my skin, sent small jolts to my warmth, and I moaned wantonly. I clenched the muscles in my tunnel around him; knowing that it was one of his favorites among my tricks. “Fuck, you know what that does to me, love…”, he croaked. I repeated the action, and Ray let out a choked moan.

He placed a hand on either side of me, and held himself up to thrust shallowly, before bottoming out again. I craved his closeness, and tried lifting my body to have his chest against my back; but Ray pushed me down. He took each of my wrists in one hand, holding them behind my back, and grabbed a handful of my hair – holding on tightly, as he forced me against the floor. I was completely at Raymond’s mercy in this position. I couldn’t move my arms, lift my back or my head; and he had placed his knees between mine – making it impossible for me to put my legs together. All this brute dominance, and his casual upper-crust demeanor, had me feeling like I was in sex-paradise.

He went back to shallow thrusts, and then one deep one, trying to make me reach my climax by stimulating my g-spot. Soon after, he was successful; heat rose from my feet and all through my body, and I felt my walls contract. I cried out in extasy. I heard Raymond groan, trying to hold back his own orgasm; apparently not finished with me yet.

After I’d settled around him, Ray pulled out. “I’d love to shag you in the backyard now, but its late, and cold; so, if you don’t mind, let’s go for the bed", he said. “That works", I agreed, though my body was still convulsing. Ray leaned down and left small kisses up my spine. “Do you need to stop?”, he asked softly. “No! Please…”, I pleaded. I managed, with Raymond’s help, to get onto the bed; my legs shaking, and breath ragged. Ray grabbed the pillow and duvet, and quickly made the bed up properly; an impressive feat, as my exhausted body was splayed out on it. He got under the duvet with me, and gently spread my legs, to lay between them.

Hooking a leg around Ray’s hips, I pulled him towards me. “I think you’ve learnt your lesson, now”, he smiled, and stroked my cheek gently. I put a hand behind his head, and lifted my head to catch his lips with my own. Our tongues stroked softly against each other, and I let out a content sigh. “Soft finish?”, I smiled. Ray lifted his head, and raised a brow at me. “Fuck no”, he declared.

Suddenly, both my knees were hooked over his shoulders, and he pushed into me with a groan. My eyes rolled back into my head, as Ray began thrusting hard and fast into me; without mercy. Every thrust felt like it reached the deepest parts of me. Gone was the well-groomed gentleman dom. Ray was a wild animal, his jaw clenched, and pupils blown. His hands were holding on to my breasts, making his arms force my thighs together. I was sure that I would have bruises on both my breasts and my thighs from his attack, could not give less of a fuck; from the extreme orgasm that was building in my core. Crying out wasn’t enough; I screamed Ray’s name so loud, I was sure his neighbors would show up with noise complaints. In his current state, I was convinced he’d probably meet them in the door naked, telling them to either get in and enjoy the show, or fuck right off.

I grabbed his biceps, and dug my nails into his skin, leaving my own marks on my lover. My legs stretched out, and every muscle in my body tightened, as I exploded. Ray growled from my walls tightening around him, and the pain my nails were surely bringing him. His hair was disheveled, and his eyes burrowing into mine. My orgasm was at its peak, and my voice hit a pitch I didn’t know it could. Ray kept thrusting, and the feeling was getting so intense, I was unsure whether or not I’d pass out before long. “Please… I… Too much!”, I whimpered; as my body was thrusted back and forth from Ray’s movements. “Almost, baby. Keep going…”, he growled.

Just as I began thinking this is it. I’m going to die from too much orgasming, Raymond pounded into me three final times, and came inside me with a roar.

I was shaking as Ray dropped my legs from his shoulders, kissed my unmoving lips; and pulled out of me. He laid down next to me, and gave a me a crooked smile. “You still with me?”, he chuckled. “I just came… a lot!”, I croaked. “I could tell…”, he said, and moved a lock of my hair out of my face. “You’ll be happy to know, that so did I”. I laughed hoarsely.

“I should get cleaned up, before I get cum all over your Egyptian cotton sheets”, I sighed. “Fuck it. They were on sale”, Ray shrugged. I shook my head in mock confusion. “Excuse me?”, I said. “You bought something on sale?”. “Just keep it between us, love”, he said, and pulled me close, to kiss me. I tugged at his bottom lip with my teeth. “I still have to go pee”, I said. I crawled out of the bed, and made my way towards the door. “Please put the towel back on the hook, when you’re done washing your hands”, he called after me. I smirked at him over my shoulder.

Once I’d finished my business, I made my way back to the bedroom. Ray had already fixed up the bed, and left his spare robe for me over a chair. Putting it on, I searched for him; finding him clearing up the mess I’d made around the house. I leaned against the doorway, watching him. “I’m sorry”, I lied. “No, you’re not”, he said. After having put the plates in the dishwasher, he walked over to me, taking my hand and pulling me with him, to sit down on the couch; where earlier he’d been enjoying my lips around his cock. “And as much as I enjoyed screwing you senseless just now, I’d like to know where all this came from”.

I looked down at our joined hands. ”You’ve been avoiding going out with me”, I said. “I know I don’t fit in to your posh lifestyle, but…”. “That’s what this was about? Getting back at me?”, he asked. “Partly”, I admitted. “And I suppose I wanted to… make you see what I’m really like. So, you could make a decision to either accept me, or…”. “Finish it”, Ray finished my sentence for me. I nodded.

He sighed deeply. “Darling… First of all, the fact that you don’t give a shit about which fork to use, and throw your clothes around, annoys the hell out of me; and makes me love you even more”. I met his eyes, and let out a short breath. Raymond had never used that word before. “Love…?”, I whispered. “Fuck yes, I love you”, he smiled. “And you not only fit in my life, you’d leave one hell of a hole, if you left. So no, I don’t want to finish it. You’re not getting rid of me by feeding me fast food, and throwing your socks in my yard”.

I frowned. “Then, why are you always working late? Cancelling our plans?”, I asked. “Well, that is the second part of this conversation, I suppose”, he said. “I knew we’d get here at some point, but I’ve been putting it off… You know what I do, isn’t exactly legal”. “Of course I do”, I said. “It’s not normal to sleep with a .48 in the drawer of your bedside table”. Ray brushed his thumb over my knuckles, and continued. “We’ve been having some issues with another… organization, in town”, he said. “They’ve been making some threatening moves… I’m worried, that of you’re seen with me, they’ll try to use you to get to me”. My jaw dropped. “As in… They’d kill me?”, I croaked. “I don’t think they’d go that far, but I’m not willing to take that chance”, Ray said firmly.

I took a few moments to think. “Ray… you can’t keep me locked up in this house”, I said. “I’m more than happy to do what you ask me to keep safe; but at some point, I’d like to get out… make all those posh cunts jealous of my arm candy”. I tugged gently at his beard, winking at him. “Who says you’re not the arm candy, darling?”, he smiled. “What, in my 20 quid H&M dresses, and worn shoes?”, I scoffed.

Ray stood up, and led me into the kitchen. He grabbed the wrapped box. “Actually, that’s why I got you this”, he said, and handed it to me. “Now, that was quite a bit more than 20 quid, but I’m sure you’ll look just as lovely in it, as you do in everything else you wear”. I blushed, and began unwrapping the box, opening the lid, to reveal a beautiful cocktail dress; in my exact size. “I don’t have anywhere to wear this!”, I said. “And it’s too expensive to keep at my flat. I’ll get robbed. I had to buy a lockbox for those earrings you got me”. “Michael has a birthday-party coming up next weekend. His wife will have my bollocks, if I don’t show; with a date”, Raymond said. “So, I can’t cancel on you this time”.

I took out the dress, and held it against me. “Bringing me as your date for your boss’ party… that’s pretty official, love”, I smiled. “It is, and it’s about time”, Ray responded. “And as far as where to store it…”. He tilted his head, and looked pleadingly. “Please leave that rat infested hell hole of a flat, and move in here permanently. I have to take a shower every time I come home from that place”. “It’s not that bad”, I said. “My next-door neighbor bakes me cookies every Christmas”. “And the one further down the hall, sells smack out of his trunk”, Ray retorted.

I bit my lip. “You really want me here? With my novelty mugs, and sneakers littering the hallway?”. “Absolutely”, Ray assured me. “Gives me ample opportunity to shag you on every surface we didn’t make it to tonight”. “Even the table in the backyard?”, I grinned. “We’ll have to make sure the grill isn’t so hot, you burn your perfect ass”, he said. “What do you say…?”. “Fuck it. Why not…?”.

Ray smiled warmly, and wrapped me in his arms. “Just for future reference; I prefer Burger King over Mickey D’s”.

---

#raymond smith x reader #ray smith #raymond smith #Ray smith reader #Raymond smith x oc #Ray smith x oc #the gentlemen #Raymond smith smut #Ray smith smut #Raymond smith fluff #charlie hunnam

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soramei · 3 years

Text

Intentional - Part 5

Pairing: Bang Chan x Reader (she/her)

Summary: Landing your first real job at JYPE was something short of a miracle. You were prepared to face the new struggles of this elusive career whilst moving to a new country, however, nothing could have prepared you for him. Will stolen glances, secret touches, and hushed nights spent in the recording room ever be enough for the both of you?

Genre: idol!bang chan au, forbidden relationship, coworkers to eventual lovers, slow burn

Warnings: cursing, eventual smut

Word Count: 4.0k

Masterlist

A/N: yeah so about that upload... i was really busy this whole week but i hope to start uploading mondays again! thanks for understanding!!

Taglist (reply to be tagged!): @planetdemon @hvunvely @fluffybitch0325 @fashi0nablee @juststop88 @straykisz @theultimaterad @margaritas-en-la-montania @meowtella

There was a pause in the phone call.

You started biting your nails, instantly regretting what you had just done. Basking in your stupidity, you could only wait for his response, for it was too late to retract what you had just said. Your day must have been worse than you thought. It must have been so bad that you had the nerve to ask Bang Chan — an idol, a person with a strict schedule, somebody who you had an argument with — to come over to your pathetic little apartment.

You kept nibbling on your fingers.

“I’ll get my jacket.”

You froze, eyes wide.

“Huh?” You were bewildered. You weren’t even expecting an answer, much less this.

“It’s cold this late at night,” he explained, “I’ll be there soon.”

You didn’t know what to say. You heard rustling on the other side of the call.

“Wait, I’ll tell you my address,” you blurted out.

“You did,” he said.

You frowned, trying to remember if you did or not. That’s right. You blushed at the memory of your first day of work.

“Oh yeah, umm, I’ll hang up now.” You awkwardly said, hanging up before Bang Chan could fit another word in.

You were a statue in your own apartment, clinging on to the last words exchanged on your phone. In actuality, you didn’t know why you asked him to come over. It was just blurted out in the moment. Or maybe it was a result of your extremely frustrating day. Either way, you felt extremely embarrassed that you did so, especially so late at night.

You started boiling some water, still trying to rationalize what you had just done. This was normal for friends, right? Na-eun and Yoojin came over just yesterday and you were friends with both of them. You knew for a fact that you two were friends, but you still couldn’t find an explanation for the strange feeling in your chest whenever you were around him.

Turning your phone on, you checked your face in the selfie camera. It was a miracle that your makeup didn’t smudge off. You thanked your new ‘CLIO’ foundation cushion, it looked like all that time you spent doing your makeup didn’t go to waste. You stared at your reflection for a couple more seconds before turning your phone off. Why did it matter what you looked like anyways? You wiped off any remaining lipstick with the back of your hand.

The kettle started rumbling, letting you know that the water was ready. You took out your mug to prepare some tea. It was a bad idea to have tea this late at night, but there was something about your mother’s tea that could knock a grown man out.

Sipping your tea, you turned on Youtube to an episode of a Korean web-drama that was getting really popular. It was another one with some rich CEO and a clumsy average girl, but you still watched, fully enamoured. On the recommendations list, there was a video with Felix — the other person you saw at the cafeteria on your first day — on the thumbnail. I can never escape from work, you thought to yourself, rolling your eyes.

You clicked on it anyways, just to pass the time. Watching through the video, you were shocked by the production value. Well, that, and Bang Chan. Whether it was hair and makeup or just his acting, he was so different from the person you knew in real life. You were in awe by his natural charisma gleaming at you through the screen as it was a rare quality that few people you knew possessed. Embarrassingly, you found your eyes drawn to only him in every group shot. He looked good in an apron.

You got distracted by more random videos before clicking back on your drama. The next episode was just about to start when the buzzer to your apartment rang.

It was Bang Chan.

Hurriedly, you shuffled towards your door. With your hand on the handle, you took a deep breath before opening the door.

“Hey,” you smiled.

“Hey,” he smiled back. He was leaning over you, his forearm on the doorframe. His coat was bulky, almost engulfing his whole upper body. He was wearing the same beanie you saw on multiple occasions, and in his hand was a white plastic bag.

You stepped aside, silently gesturing for him to come inside. He took your hint and sauntered in the room, head turning left and right to observe his surroundings.

“It’s not much,” you blushed, realizing how small your apartment really was. You could basically see all your belongings from the center of the room.

“No, it’s cute.” Bang Chan looked at you, taking his hat off. His dimple peaked out. “I brought some leftovers from that barbecue place. The kids and I went there after our shoot today.”

So that was what the bag was. With only food on your mind, you rushed to help hang Bang Chan’s coat before setting the table up.

The food was really good. They were leftovers, but it was so good. Stuffing a bite of pork belly in your mouth, you sighed. Where was this food earlier today?

“It’s good, right?” Bang Chan asked whilst chewing on a piece of meat. “I’ll take you next time.”

It was like he read your mind. You nodded eagerly in response, to which Bang Chan replied with a smirk.

“So, uh,” he scratched the back of his neck, “how was your date today?”

You rolled your eyes, not wanting to remember that embarrassment of a night. It was such a pity too, because that man was probably the most gorgeous man you’ve ever witnessed. You swore he had just stepped out of a webtoon when you first met him.

“It was alright,” you shrugged. It was difficult to reflect on the date without putting a damper on your mood, but maybe vocalizing it would have helped ease your discomfort. “He compared me to a model, you know.”

Bang Chan chuckled, making you look up in confusion.

“Was it because you looked exactly like the model?”

“No,” you replied.

His face immediately fell. “You’re kidding, right? Y/n, tell me you don’t believe anything that loser said. He’s got to be something below garbage if he was comparing two women.”

“Thanks, Chan.” You tried to force a grin on your face. “I appreciate it.”

There was a pause.

“I know my opinion means nothing, but Y/n, I think you’re beautiful.”

You stared into Bang Chan’s eyes, frozen like a statue. Your heart was beating so loud that you could hear it more than you could feel it. He stared back at you from across the table; mouth parted, breaths uneven.

You’ve received many compliments before, to which you would always reply with a smile and a quick ‘thank you’. However, it felt as if your brain malfunctioned in this moment and your heart was the only thing keeping you alive. You could still feel your body, but you couldn’t think.

“Thank you, Chan.” You awkwardly coughed, blushing profusely. Immediately focusing your eyes at the table, you couldn’t bear to keep looking at him.

The two of you ate in silence, with only the tapping of chopsticks adding to the ambience of the room. You wanted to make conversation with him, but you did not want to be the first one to break the silence. It frustrated you that you were so shy right now as you’ve never been like this back home.

To heck with it, you thought. There was no need to be shy around him.

“So,” you still couldn’t look him in the face, “any shows you’ve been watching lately?”

Small talk was good. You could do small talk.

“Actually, I’ve been wanting to watch this Transformers movie for quite a while.”

“Transformers?” You’ve never heard of that one. It must’ve been an American movie.

“Seriously?” his eyes widened. “You’ve never seen Transformers before? Oh, we’ve gotta watch it now.”

“You wanna?” you smiled. “I haven’t used my TV since moving in.”

“Mhm, let’s do it.” He stuffed the rest of the leftovers in his mouth before standing up and clearing the table.

You watched him clear the table in a trance. You should have offered to help since it was your own home, but watching the veins on his hands appear and disappear was way more interesting. Watching him, you suddenly remembered the hoodie.

“Oh, that’s right!” You exclaimed, shuffling over to the bag with the hoodie in it. Taking Bang Chan’s black hoodie out, you held it up to him with both hands.

He looked down at you and chuckled.

“Keep it,” he took it from your hands and slipped the hoodie over your head. “At least until you buy a new jacket.”

“I will.” You rolled the sleeves of his hoodie higher to show your hands. You turned the light off, leaving only the floor lamp to illuminate your apartment. Grabbing the remote from your coffee table, you summoned Bang Chan over to the couch.

You turned on the TV, fooling around with the remote control for a few seconds before giving up.

“I give up.” You sighed. Pouting, you handed the remote over to Bang Chan. He took it from you and started reading the buttons.

“Netflix, right?” Bang Chan asked, to which you nodded. “There we go.”

He scrolled through the titles, looking for the coveted movie. Once he found the movie, he quickly selected it and turned the subtitles on. That was nice of him, you thought. Although you also studied english in university, it was nowhere near the level of watching a full english movie.

The title sequence started and you tried to immerse yourself in the movie. You watched in awe, surprised at the fast pace of the action already.

Fully engrossed, you started to sink your back into the couch. Half-way throughout the title scene, you felt Bang Chan stretch his arm behind you to rest on the back pillow. Suddenly, you started feeling too aware of your surroundings. You sat up straighter.

Throughout the whole movie, you caught wafts of Bang Chan’s cologne everytime he moved. He smelled like safety and familiarity.

You turned your head up a little to get a glimpse of his profile, mapping out every edge and curve of his face. The light illuminated the tip of his nose, along with his dewy cheekbones and chin. The plum of his lips were let slightly open, allowing his teeth to peek out slightly. You unconsciously let out a sigh.

“Something wrong?” He turned his body to face you.

You shook your head and focused on the movie.

The rest of the movie was pretty good, although it lost you at parts. You watched the end credits in silence, not knowing what to say.

“So,” Bang Chan cleared his throat beside you, “I should get going now. Since it’s late.”

You turned your head to face him, not realizing how close the two of you had physically gotten throughout the movie. Looking up at him, your face was inches away from his. His face was almost enveloped by the darkness of your apartment. You heard his breathing get heavier.

“Yeah,” you breathed out, “you should.”

He didn’t get up though.

You heard his staggered breath as you kept looking in his eyes. The end credits had long been over by now. Your own breath was just as shaky and you heard your heart beat out of your chest.

He started leaning in. Slowly.

Your eyes widened. You gulped, your nerves snapped you back to reality all of a sudden. Wasn’t he supposed to be your friend? This wasn’t what friends did… Right?

Clearing your throat, you leaned back shyly.

“You should go. I don’t want the others to notice you’re gone.”

Silence.

“Yeah.” Bang Chan’s lips flattened in a line. Without another word, he stood up and walked towards your door.

You followed him in silence, hoping to at least send him off. Wrapping your arms around your torso, you watched as he put his boots on in the dark. He tied his laces, and with a nod, he opened the door and stepped out.

You were left with a sour taste in your mouth and a cloudiness in your head. Still standing in front of your door, you tried to process what had just happened. However, you couldn’t. All you could think about was the soft curls of his hair, the delicate threads of his eyelashes, and his lips. The dusty rose of his lips. The parting of his lips. Inviting you in.

You were frozen, looking at nothing particularly. The only thing on your mind was Bang Chan.

The door opened.

“Hey, sorry, I forgot my jack-”

His sentence never got a chance to complete itself as you rushed to him, wrapping your arms around his neck. As your lips touched his, you felt a fire ignite in you like nothing you’ve felt before. Your fingers clawed at the nape of his neck, wanting more. Wanting to be closer.

Almost immediately, Bang Chan responded. He was taken by shock at first, but his hands didn’t waste any time to grip your waist. You felt the muscles of his shoulders tighten as he pulled you closer.

He moved you back into your apartment by the waist, lips never leaving your own. You blindly shuffled backwards, only focused on trying to get closer to him. If that was even possible.

You ignored the clunking of his boots against your clean floor, allowing him to guide you to the couch. A whimper left his lips as you used your hand to comb through his hair, pulling it. His soft brown curls were silk against your fingertips.

The back of your legs hit the couch and he turned you around so he could sit on the couch. Your lips finally left his. You gasped for air, trying to steady your deep breaths.

Bang Chan’s breathing was synchronized with yours, his equally as unsteady. He reached his hands out again, grabbing your waist and pulling you on top of him. You were a ragdoll, responding to whatever he wanted to do to you.

With each knee on either side of him, you gripped his jaw and kissed him again. The fire inside of you instantly reignited. It was addicting.

The two of you didn’t dare to separate from each other, only parting to gasp for air every now and then. Even in the dark, you could imagine the plum of his lips and the threads of his eyelashes. This drove the fire in you more.

“What if the boys realize you’re gone?” you breathed out the next time you parted from his lips. They were most likely sleeping, but the thought still worried you.

“Fuck them.” Bang Chan exhaled. Grabbing the back of your neck, he reconnected his lips with yours. You gladly complied.

His sloppy kisses slowly moved from your lips to your jaw, then to your neck, eliciting a soft whimper from your throat. This seemed to only edge him on as kept leaving sloppy kisses against your neck, all the while running his hands up and down your waist.

His cologne surrounded you, keeping you safe. Soon later, the adrenaline left the two of you, leaving only the sound of heavy breathing to fill the room. You brushed your thumb under his eye to which he deeply inhaled.

“Chan?” you said. He was leaving kisses all over your collarbone.

“Hmm?” He didn’t seem to pay much mind to what you were saying.

“It’s half past three. I really think you should get going.” You didn’t want him to leave, but you were almost sure he had another packed schedule for tomorrow.

“Mhmm.” Your words went in one ear and out the other as he made his way up your neck again. You couldn’t help but close your eyes and let out a small moan.

“C’mon, get up. How did you even get here, by the way?” It took everything in you to break away from his touch, but you were starting to get sleepy.

“Taxi.” He said, helping you get up from his lap. He stood up after you, brushing his hand against your waist one last time before making his way over to his jacket.

“You’re allowed to ride a taxi?” You tilted your head, sceptical.

He slipped his jacket on.

“No.” He peppered little kisses on your cheeks. “You don’t know how long I’ve wanted to do that now.”

You giggled, pushing him by his shoulders out the door. He played along, pretending to stumble with every step he took back.

“Text me when you get home,” you said, repeating what he said to you on your first day of work.

He nodded in response and winked before turning around to head home. As soon as the door shut, you slapped both hands against your face. Your little act of impulse had spun your head in spirals. You didn’t know whether to feel relieved at the fact that Bang Chan reciprocated your impulsive actions, or to worry that you had not only just kissed your coworker — but also a freaking idol. No one — not Manager Chen, your friends, or even anyone in the general public — could know about this. If they did, both your careers would be screwed.

You doted on this thought as you got ready for bed, only the worst possible outcome came to mind. If either your manager or his manager knew about what happened tonight, you could get fired. Or even blacklisted. You sat in bed, nervously biting your nails.

Your phone buzzed.

Bang Chan: Hey, I got home. Nobody’s awake… ^^

Bang Chan: Don’t think too much, alright? It’s late, go to sleep…

You felt relief reading his text. For some reason, he knew you were overthinking your actions. You decided to listen to his words and go to sleep.

The next day, Sunday, was very uneventful compared to the day before. You texted Bang Chan back when you woke up, but because of his busy schedule, he hadn’t had the time to reply yet.

Yoojin called in when you were eating lunch, asking about your date. You told her the truth, explaining how there would definitely not be a second date with that man. She sounded disappointed and vehemently tried to set you up with another man in her pool. You politely declined, thinking about your restless night with Bang Chan.

You finished some work ahead of time to free up the next week. Since you were invited to work with Manager Chen at the content shooting, you assumed that you could lessen your work stress ahead of time.

The shooting days were allocated for Friday and Saturday, with there being an overnight stay at the mountains. Whilst you didn’t know the arrangements for Stray Kids, you were informed that the production crew booked a small lodge for the team. You were excited to not only see a behind the scenes of a real shoot, but to also possibly form a closer relationship with Manager Chen.

You were thankful that you did some work ahead of time as Monday’s workload was so much lighter than usual. People were still coming to you with their ideas for the project, but with your other work done, you had the time to go through everybody’s ideas.

You didn’t hear from Bang Chan the whole day, which was nothing out of the blue. You remembered him showing his schedule to you once. The amount of things he had to do everyday had your eyes bulging out from their sockets. All of a sudden, you were thankful for your nine-to-five job.

The next couple of days ran the same way as your Monday, with you easily breezing through your workload. Since you had more time during your breaks at work, you took to exploring the part of the building that you could. You admired all the art, the trophies, the awards and memorabilia. Of course, you also spent more time with your new friend Na-eun.

On Thursday, the day before the shoot, you were helping the producers by translating some notes for the script. All was going smoothly, when you got a text.

It was from Bang Chan.

You weren’t going to lie; you were curious as to what he sent you. He was basically silent the whole week so far, and if you were being honest, you missed hearing his voice. And seeing his face. And feeling his hands brush against your waist.

Bang Chan: Come to my recording room… I’ve got something to show you.

Your eyes lit up right away, curious as to what he wanted to show you. Quickly checking the time, you decided to take your lunch break then and there. After all, you didn’t have much work left for the day anyways.

Locking up your computer, you zoomed inconspicuously past all the other cubicles and made your way to the elevators. You weaved through the hallways of his floor, praying that your memory didn’t escape you. It seemed like your memory was on your side today as you found yourself in front of a familiar set of doors. You didn’t bother to knock before going in.

Inside was Bang Chan: feet up on the desk, drinking from his iced coffee, concentrating on his producing software. You smiled. He looked so comfortable, even in an ‘office’.

He had his headset in, and didn’t seem to notice that you had entered. You went up behind him and tapped his shoulder. He turned around, and immediately threw his feet off the desk and stood up upon seeing that it was you. You smirked.

“I should really put a ‘please knock’ sign on the door.” He cursed under his breath. He reached behind you to close the door.

You giggled.

“So, what do you have to show me?” you wondered aloud.

“A new song. Since the filming is tomorrow, the producers put me on a time crunch to finish the song by today.”

So that was why he was so busy, you thought. You didn’t realize how the sudden filming would have impacted his schedule for the month. Especially since it would take up two whole days.

He let you sit in his chair, and hovered over you to press play on the song. His chair smelled like his cologne.

As he was playing the song, your eyes drifted up to see his face. The face — even after only four days — you missed. The dark circles under his eyes were prominent. That, along with his disheveled hair, told you that he truly was dedicated to his work. You imagined him sitting where you were, two in the morning, sipping on his iced americano.

“You like it?” His eyes drifted towards you, resembling a puppy bringing a ball back to its owner.

“It’s amazing. I don’t know how you managed this in just a few days,” you said. And you were sincere too. You couldn’t imagine yourself doing any of this.

“Eh, you know, late nights.” he shrugged. “Wanna see another?”

You nodded, and the two of you began listening to another one of his songs. You listened in silent wonderment.

However, the silence didn’t last long as the two of you soon found yourselves on the couch: hands all over each other, lips the same. You were lying underneath him, his arms resting on either side of you to hold his weight up. Your lips never left his as you ran your hands up and down his defined biceps.

The two of you couldn’t stay away from each other. The sound of the songs that he had put on shuffle filled the room, along with a fleeting sigh of moan every now and then. Bang Chan’s hand had started wandering up your blouse when, all of a sudden, the door opened.

“Hey, I have the lyrics h-” He stopped mid-sentence, eyes wide.

Crap.

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