#anyway I am once again writing essays in the tags | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

kaus-quietis · 2 years

Text

They are (BSD Fyodor x reader)

More precisely, Philosopher!Fyodor x Translator!Reader for @chuuyasboots beautiful BSD event, Renewing the Renaissance. Check out the full list of the event’s fics here!

Genre: I can’t believe it myself, but it’s fluff. Completely SFW.

Night fell into dawn’s embrace, in vivid red and purple play. Steady steps were on their way, up a hill covered in dew. Each droplet rejoiced in a frail man’s gaze, one that was trained to inspect even the simplest of things, the most mundane, and use them as steps on a ladder to the heavens. Like so many times before, such close inspection of nature was an elating activity for the philosopher approaching Y/N’s house on the hill. Each transparent drop of cold fresh water on wood and flowers and fallen leaves pointed his mind towards the universal ideas that weaved this world together: the same ones that also weaved them, the two, together. At the idea of the grand Author who made him and Y/N meet, the now hurrying philosopher only smirked, feeling he was all too familiar with Him, the object of his research for so many Parisian years. But Fyodor brushed this thought aside, focusing on the upward road he knew so well, the one that each season, again and again, guided him through Tuscany to –

“Columba mea.”

Subtly, silently, the philosopher entered Y/N’s house, only his greeting – recalling the Song of Songs [1] – letting their hard-working lover know he arrived. Through the smell of oak wood, the light reflected on parchment, the rustling of dried flowers, the silence of black ink, Y/N’s voice responded, completing him as always:

“Dilectus meus.”

The philosopher approached their writing desk, hiding the precious things he carried not only under his thick black cloak, but also inside his white robe. Admiring all the manuscripts lying open around Y/N, he deduced they were in the middle of translating another work of Greek origin, comparing all the copies they could find, analyzing all their unique variations in words and writing, everything in search for the original intended meaning. Y/N did not even lift their eyes soaked in concepts to meet their visitor’s unperturbed ones, hiding his eagerness perfectly behind their burning amethyst colour. Still, Y/N could not help but spot his unusual attire.

“Such blasphemy. A Cistercian disguised as a Dominican? But why?” Y/N laughed and wondered what his schemes were the night before.

“Oh, I would never… I side with the seculars.” [2]

“Surely you do. You side with your own self –”

“– and I side with you.”

Y/N stopped their work for a while, knowing what came next, and welcoming the rite with a smile. At first, they felt their lover’s palm embracing one side of their head in caress. The other side soon followed to know his kiss, lingering as if on the very mind he cherished so. As Y/N let their head gradually fall towards him, their smile widened as they made a mental bet right there and then. What followed did not even disturb the suavity of the moment, it only proved Y/N right on their bet:

“You misspelled cruoris on the left column, fourth row.” [3]

Parting with the warmth of his chest Y/N sunk into, the copyist sighed, moving the sharp knife they were holding from one hand into the other, switching places with their quill pen. They slowly scraped a bit of the ink away from the parchment and changed the abbreviated form of the noun. Y/N fixed the mistake, grateful that their annoyingly perceptive “partner-in-crime” spotted the minuscule “butchered” word on time. At last, they lifted their tired eyes to meet his, desiring to gift him sincerity. “I am proud to have you” was the message their gaze carried, but as quick as it reached the philosopher’s mind – and oh, how quickly he was catching on all the time –, Y/N almost teasingly dropped their adoring look and changed the subject.

“So what did you bring me this time?”, Y/N rubbed their hands in child-like excitement as their smiling visitor put five or six thick manuscripts on the desk. Y/N could not tell just yet, but their whole soul radiated.

“I brought exactly what you asked from me…”

The young man lowered both his upper body and his tone, a speck of mischievousness glinting in his eyes: “…begged, even, on each night of our honey-sweet August, when we–”

“DON’T YOU FEAR THE LORD” Y/N tried to eat their shout, as if not to disturb the new books that the philosopher brought them. To hide the insane enjoyment Y/N was indulging in this very moment, the translator tried to fit it all under a mask of pure-heartedness, pretending to focus only on the manuscripts. Three of them had sophisticated binding and parchment pages Y/N did not yet dare to touch, while the rest looked like combined ones, mixing paper and parchment. That alone spoke so much to Y/N: the compiler probably valued the contents so much that they chose to collect copies and excerpts of all possible kinds, without wasting anything. The collector, Y/N continued to muse, was surely responding to the need to preserve the past, a lost tradition, or a neglected author’s works. Viscerally: Y/N resonated with this imaginary compiler viscerally, and now that this thought process was running around in their mind, they could barely control their trembling lip from revealing a bright grin. Yet Y/N stayed silent and still, expecting an answer from their dear guest as soon as they locked eyes with him again. The audacious philosopher inhaled slowly, preparing his voice for a dead-serious tone, and despite Y/N’s likewise dead-serious stare, he dared to continue:

“Y/N. You asked for more.

So I offer you more”

His next smirk widened, shone on his lips, as if it has been eagerly awaiting the blade that suddenly hovered above his Adam’s apple. It all happened in the blink of an eye, but this expression has no meaning here: the philosopher did not want to lose such thrilling, fleeting sight by blinking. He knew Y/N’s knife would show its true dance as soon as the provocation reached not their ears, but their heart. The man just smiled and swallowed slowly in delight.

“You’d want to keep that for your quills~”

At his mocking suggestion, served with that look, an expressionless Y/N put their knife on the writing desk. Be it for vanity or play, they could not allow their face to show what they were really feeling: their heart was racing, and the adrenaline made them reach heights of happiness each time such tension appeared between the two. But there was more: Y/N saw their elated state’s reflection, and not in the clean blade they put away, no. They saw it in the philosopher’s own eyes: the thrill, the rush, the excitement behind the composed mask, if only one dared to pierce through those dark pupils.

“Another find from the nameless philosopher. You continue to plague my existence”, Y/N mocked the man who was still standing next to their desk, not too distant, not too close now.

“Nameless, oh, please… It is you who refused to call me Theodoros for a reason unknown to me.”

“The reason was, and still is, it sounds like another one of your fake names and I can’t have that.”

“Don’t be so harsh on my pseudonyms, my soul, I have to use them for each–”

“Yeah, yeah, each “figure of authority” you flatter and profit of, as far as the sea spreads and swirls”, Y/N interrupted him gesticulating defeat, for it was a backstory they knew by heart already. The philosopher did not even mind; instead, he gently took the heavy manuscripts and closed the distance between them and his favourite translator.

“Speaking of seas – and to offer you a hint as of the tomes’ origins –, you would not have believed your eyes, Y/N, the immense number of people gathering from East and West, now in Florence! It is such a pity you refused my invitation, we could have met so many honourable people, we could have shared absurd abundant meals with them all and then–” [4]

“Aha, so that is how it went. That was at the start of this year, correct? Whose illuminated mind decided to part forever with these – I assume – rarest of books?” Y/N quickly jumped to correct conclusions, hearing the philosopher chuckle as a first response.

“Oh, but you see, he is under the impression I will bring them back in two months. That is perfectly acceptable. Many things can change in two months,” he explained, forcing himself to hide a wicked grin that was creeping on his lips at the thought of his “updated” plans. “Frankly, I was not entirely convinced by his lectures, but the Florentines are at his feet, my love, at his feet… or… at least the vast majority. One night, at a banquet, after several negotiations and agreements that would greatly please the Greeks – imagine, an entire future Platonic accademia! impressive plans these Florentines have –, I reached a deal with the Greek… “theologian” too. A debatable status, if you see through his words, but that does not change the value of what he brought from his Greek land [5]. You can see part of the result before your–”, he tilted his head in endearment both mocking and true, “–spellbinding eyes, dear partner.”

Needless to say, Y/N was so used to this. After they met on the hills six, maybe seven years ago, as he was travelling the land, the nameless philosopher would visit Y/N’s little house near the small forest again and again to chit-chat. Although both of them were rather rigid and playing mysterious at first, the two realized soon enough that they shared the most pleasant discussions in each other’s company. They started to value eachother more and more in their self-isolation from the rumours of society: one as a wandering philosopher in exile, the other as a book-producing hermit. Y/N came to know he is a magister theologiae of the University of Paris, but his birth origin remained unknown. His sharp yet melancholic features always struck Y/N as foreign, his peculiar accent charmed them – on the rare occasions when he did not hide it on purpose –, but nothing captured their interest more than his mind, endless like meanings lost in translation. His own excitement bloomed and he truly opened up when Y/N revealed to them they were not only a copyist, but also a translator, dedicating their life to collecting and preserving Greek manuscripts, especially anything that could link them back to what Augustine still followed so closely in his early writings, and to what was at the roots of even that [6]. Y/N would collect, copy and translate everything into Latin and let the resulting manuscripts spread all around the West, its libraries still lacking too many Greek works in their opinion. Y/N was sick of Aristotle, they were sick of his commentators, they felt the search for Plato should be prolonged and deepened, but who would listen? Only a few villagers, only a few remarkably cultured monks and nuns, even a few royals, but overall only a few souls who kept donating parchment to Y/N. This way, they could continue to produce such compilations of translations. And so, for six, maybe seven years already, Y/N sunk into this kind of work, and with infinite pleasure: it was simply too perfect.

Still, it took a few more years for Y/N to realize who exactly God’s gift to them was. Admiring such passionate pursuit of a higher goal, the philosopher decided to help Y/N on their mission. It was only natural, he had the… let’s say “means” and “ways” to find more, to “obtain” more manuscripts that would please Y/N, as he could enter anyone’s heart and soul (not to even mention pockets) with his training and talent of speech. He had nothing to lose by entertaining Y/N – in fact, he enjoyed their interactions and exchanges each time they met, even if only few times a year, when new findings and new thoughts had him running up that hill.

“More…” Y/N whispered sweetly, already a victim to nostalgia, slowly opening and inspecting each book. It was summer again now, but the last August still lingered in both of their minds: somehow, he was able to stay with Y/N for the entire month – a most predictable one, as there was nothing that surprised the two old partners. Everything was predictable: each tease and each wordplay, each mental exercise, each gesture, each day, each night, and every mark. For their minds, everything was predictable in the most entertaining way, whereas outside their bond predictability equalled boredom. They both accepted it all, and so they stayed.

“So these are…” Y/N shook the nostalgia away, speaking in a cold tone, so obviously fake it was adorable.

“Some excerpts of Platonic dialogues. Some copied in their entirety too. Surely some things by Plotinus and, if luck’s on your side, Porphyry too, I would assume. My apologies that I did not have time to check, I arrived in Florence to pick them up a couple of days ago. You shall see, only two of them have somewhat of an index, you know how it is. I think I saw the Enneads, too?”

“The what?” Y/N showed surprise, so obviously fake, but only to themselves. Right?

“The Enneads. Plotinus. You will adore this” the philosopher chose to give only a simple answer, so that Y/N could have the pleasure of discovery all for themselves. Hiding a smile, he was already imagining the moment Y/N will dive into the thickest manuscript the philosopher brought them – how Y/N will devour its contents and lose themselves in their words.

Overwhelmed by emotion, Y/N sunk in thought for a moment, deciding whether to show deepest gratitude or deepest suspicion to their precious friend and lover. Of course, they chose a sweeter side of the latter.

“Love… Then… I assume these should have gone directly to Ficino [7] !! Heavens!! How angelic of you to offer to transport them to him!” Y/N burst into wild laughter, “This is AMAZING, and he will never know!! Ahahahahah!”

And so Y/N jumped into the arms of the philosopher disguised as a Cistercian disguised as a Dominican. They embraced him strongly enough to feel the contour of his shoulders under his two hoods, while he took advantage of the momentum to spin them around in a few full circles. Repositioning themselves, Y/N’s hands around his neck, they exchanged a confident calm look, completely satisfied with the situation. Yet Y/N’s chest got tense suddenly, succumbing to a suffocating feeling they by now struggled to hide. Y/N so desperately wanted to succumb to their shared bliss this one time – no, not like in August, but finally in the truest way they knew they still had to reach.

And Y/N hoped to reach it, because Y/N could no longer bear it. They wanted to escape.

“My soul, allow me to guess what drowns your heart in pain now. Although, why would there be anything like that…

…when we exist in the best possible world God could have created.”

The philosopher said that with a genuine smile, knowing exactly what could come next, likewise in repressed hope that Y/N would respond exactly the way he imagined they would.

Because, if they did, then…

“…

…

…Pascal isn’t born yet, Fyodor Dostoyevsky.”

Finally! FINALLY! Ah, how liberating it was to answer Fyodor’s call now! Oh, how liberating for both of them! They could finally drop their façade officially, they could finally erase the thought of everything they’ve built between them being one gigantic lie, they could finally, finally stop…

… h u n t i n g e a c h o t h e r d o w n .

This was the last test they threw at each other and Y/N knew: not answering Fyodor’s call now would have meant Y/N denying – …

…

“… – all those years they spent together in the novel. Look at us, Poe-kun. We’re both in our mid-30s. Carrying your novel on my person each day? Yeah, I hate to admit this, but there isn’t a second I’m not nervous. And it gets worse each month… What is even happening? Will they ever come out?” The voice of the master detective sounded dull, yet accumulated nervousness was imprinted on every consonant. He spoke almost absent-mindedly, as if he waited far too long for the conclusion of his plan. It worked, it did: Y/N and Fyodor were both trapped inside Poe’s Renaissance-themed novel. But Y/N was supposed to escape around five years ago – exit the novel carrying Fyodor’s corpse, his blood on their knife, and they could not fail. Ranpo designed the plan around the best assassin the Agency and the Port Mafia could hire, in a joint effort to catch the Rat. Ranpo even adapted to Fyodor’s strategies, after all, and Dazai supervised the entire thing, until he simply disappeared one day. Nobody knew why, they could only hope he would return to them again alive, unharmed, victorious…

Poe brought two cups of hot chocolate and gently put them on Ranpo’s desk. “I don’t quite know how to describe this, but I got a feeling the time will come soon”, he said, blowing the steam in the direction of his beloved raccoon, which sniffed around and licked its nose, raising its sleepy eyes from under Ranpo’s palm. “You said that 16 days ago, what can I do with this?”, the detective whined, knowing that if he took the hot chocolate and sipped from it now, it would surely burn both his lips and his tongue, so that they could not feel any taste for a good while. Somehow, as Ranpo was processing this, the fluffy raccoon handed him Y/N’s confidential contact card that Ranpo lost under his empty bags of sweets, years and years ago. The detective never saw such a determined look of steel imprinted on any other human face and his first impression of Y/N never left him. How could an assassin of such high intellect take so much time, waste time inside Poe’s novel? Refusing to say anything else, as if fearing a bad omen, Ranpo simply exhaled stating the obvious: “There it was…”

…

…There it was! Yet another mark of a voluntary player of Fyodor’s own games. Before him – he was sure of it now – stood a person willing to run the same race even in the most insignificant ways, such as spotting an anachronistic philosophical reference in what was supposed to be the 15th-century Tuscany. His suspicions came true, as well as Y/N’s. They both knew what they were now, and all doubts vanished.

Y/N’s arms still around Fyodor’s neck, the two now even closer in a tightened adamant hold, the translator waited calmly for the philosopher’s verbal reply, for his wonderstruck eyes already burned with delight and fever.

“I’d say mission accomplished, wouldn’t you too, my soul?” Fyodor extended his left hand towards Y/N, who took it in the most natural manner. “We entered this simplistic novel as each other’s hunter. Let us walk out as partners, as equals reborn.”

Fyodor’s assigned assassin never expected a change of purpose, and truly even less a change of heart, but it was the Agency’s and Mafia’s mistake to toy with those they failed to understand. The truth has always been there, predictable and in plain sight, and now Y/N could grasp it, entwine their fingers with it, with their lover’s. A blinding light began engulfing the two, a sign the novel was rejecting them. The translator gave the philosopher a smileless, determined look:

“Correct. You are no longer my target.

…They are.”

– – –

Endnotes:

[1] "Columba mea", Latin for "my dove", but literally "my pigeon" as a species; "dilectus meus", Latin for "my beloved (m)". [2] Referring to monks belonging to the Cistercian Order and Dominican Order respectively, as well as to the seculars, religiously-neutral persons (or, in this case, intellectuals), not consecrated to a monastic order, nor affiliated with a religious institution, e.g. the Church. [3] "Cruoris", Latin noun (genitive case, singular) meaning "of the blood <freshly spilled or flowing from a wound>" or, by extension, figuratively, "of the murder / assassination". [4] Referring to the ecumenical Council of Ferrara-Florence (1438-1445), more precisely to when the council was moved to Florence in January 1439. Large numbers of representatives of the Latin Church and the Greek Church gathered to discuss doctrinal differences in hopes of reuniting the two Christian Churches, officially separated since the 1054 Great Schism, also known as the East-West Schism. [5] Referring to Georgios Gemistos Plethon (c. 1355/60-1452/54), Greek scholar who reintroduced the Western/Latin public to the ideas and works of Plato during the 1438-1439 beforementioned Council of Florence. It is said he influenced Cosimo de' Medici to found the Platonic Academy of Florence. Despite having translated and assimilated Aristotelian works already (12th-13th century, thanks to Arabic translations and commentaries), Western Europe (Latin-speaking Europe) did not know the majority of Plato's works and many important Neoplatonic works, as it severely lacked translations and overall access to Greek manuscripts. This Council was a major event that led to communication between the Latin and the Greek cultures, exchanging knowledge and manuscripts, and Plethon was a key-figure in this. Ironically perhaps, the Churches themselves remained separated. [6] Referring to Neoplatonism and Platonism respectively. [7] Marsilio Ficino (1433-1499), Italian humanist philosopher and theologian. He was the first translator of Plato's complete works, from Greek to Latin, immensely contributing to the revival of Platonic philosophy in Latin (Western) Europe. Among many other translation projects and his own works, Ficino also translated works of Neoplatonic philosophers, such as Plotinus, Porphyry, and Iamblichus. He was the central figure and leader of the Platonic Academy of Florence.

#bungou stray dogs #bsd fyodor #bsd fyodor x reader #bsd fyodor dostoyevsky #bsd fyodor dostoyevsky x reader #bsd fyodor dostoevsky #bsd fanfiction #renewing the renaissance #bsd x reader #bsd event #fyodor dostoyevsky x reader #I CAN'T BELIEVE I AM ONCE AGAIN CONTRINBUTING TO THE DOSTOYEVSKY X READER TAG #how could I do this/??? how did I succeed??? how why where did these 3200+ words come from?? I am so nervous and I want to hide forever #I am no writer but I hope this will entertain a few fellow fans of this fine character a normal amount kfjsdnfksjd #how?? me?? writing Fedya fluff?? how on Earth #anyway ngl I put lots of love into this idea for the event and I am glad I managed to post it #also you're NOT getting stereotypical philosopher tropes with this one because I serve them like actual people #not like idealized discount versions of Sokrates fjksngjs trust me it's my job #ok now excuse while I go hide in a cave of course #one day I'll post my Fedya essay too to bring canon evidence that he has indeed a playful mind and can tease others but until then.. enjoy

103 notes · View notes

statuesquueart · 2 years

Photo

Sire to pyre, brother, I swore it to you.

Findis, from @dialux ‘s i imagined a dark world where the stars clamor to be inside us (which is absolutely breathtaking, please go read it!)

#findis #silmarillion #the silmarillion #silm #tolkien #j.r.r. tolken #lotr #tolkien ladies #@ dialux: PLEASE ik i've said it before but DAMN your characterization is literally off the charts!! (is it spelled with an s or z sigh)#you wrote findis so so so so well!!!! literally!! i was gonna say it gives me serotonin but that implies that's it's like. fluff??#which it's not! so it doesn't give me serotonin it instead gives me whatever chemical makes me go absolutely fucking feral #also it makes me want to scream in the best possible way! like i am a woman who is full of rage and i'm here i exist #i'm alive because i bleed! anyway many thoughts head very full i love your writing style so much and again. your characterization brought #-life to characters who are mentioned once. maybe twice? in the published silm (i'm looking at this findis fic and also off the top of #my head the caranthir one!! whew that was a lot of tags sorry for the mini essay <3 your writing? god tier <3 #feanor #jrrt #the silm #lis tag #silm fanart #tolkien fanart

35 notes · View notes

feralshadowdemon · 2 years

Text

i know you all like the geese a lot and i personally think they’re adorable but i did not expect this much traction for them. i.

why are there so many of you liking my funky little fyogoose and chugooseya??

#i am in shock right now words are hard #how do i thank you all properly without writing an essay #i appreciate the love for them. and i thank you all for showing that #but i am in shock from the traction they formed #thank you?? alot?? insert actual coherent thank you here??#my brain's broken we'll be back on track in like. a day or two. yeah #anyways yeah thank you a lot for all the love for the geese!! it made my day and it was quite nice to see my geese gain alot of love #once again i am in shock so english is very hard #but yes. thank you all very much for giving them love #alright we have too many tags now buckaroos its time to stop adding them

1 note · View note

pluto-sims · 7 months

Text

Follower Gift - Rootin' Tootin' Posters and Smells Like Teen Spirit Posters

well i did NOT see this coming but here i am with some cc???? so uhm! i recently reached 10k followers which???? was ridiculously unexpected, especially as i have been pretty much MIA these last few months. i sadly still dont have time to be active on here, or to make much cc, which makes me beyond sad but i really wanted to at least make SOMETHING for you all even if its just some small wall art cc. simblr, and getting into making cc, has given me so much joy over the years, and given me motivation and a community when life has been really shitty, so.....yeah, thank you all so much for enriching my life! i could go on, but i'll stop now before i write a very overly dramatic essay.

anyway, here's two sets of simlish posters as a small token of my appreciation. details under the cut! love you all >:)

@maxismatchccworld @emilyccfinds @mmfinds @mmoutfitters

Rootin Tootin' Posters

BGC

16 swatches featuring icons from the Horse Ranch pack, simlish text, and colourful backgrounds

Custom thumbnail, correct colour tags

Smells Like Teen Spirit Posters

BGC

27 swatches featuring icons from the High School Years pack, simlish text, and colourful backgrounds

Custom thumbnail, correct colour tags

aaaaaaand i? think that's it? i am so out of practice of doing this lmao. anyway, it was genuinley so much fun to make some cc again, i really and truly miss it SO much and even just this lil bit was so enjoyable. i hope you all like them! and thanks once again to everyone, you're all awesome and im so thankful to have met so many kind, talented and creative people in my time on here!

Download: Curseforge / Patreon (both 100% free to everyone, always.)

(p.s thank you to those who tested this!!!! its been a Hot Minute since ive made cc and i feel so rusty so the extra check was really reassuring)

#ts4 cc #sims 4 cc #ts4cc #sims 4 maxis match #maxis match cc #my cc #sims 4 custom content #sims 4 cute cc #ts4 cute cc #sims 4 decor #ts4 decor #sims decor #ts4 posters #sims 4 posters #sims 4 build buy #sims 4 wall art #wall art cc

758 notes · View notes

azrielgreen · 3 months

Text

There's a reason I always moderate comments but i approved this one so people can see how truly vile it gets sometimes. I'm not arrogant. I don't think the way I write is better at all. Exploring them on an authentic level means exploring this, or any, version of them with wholehearted passion, not that this is the authentic interpretation of them. Writing intense stuff isn't a brag, it's a warning so people can be prepared for stuff like arguments and confrontations. I always over-warn for CW stuff so that, again, people are prepared. I never once have asked people to read it. It's just there and I've tried my best to a) write something i loved and b) thoroughly warn those who might read it. Any interpretation of the characters is valid and worth exploring. It's so sad to see a reeled off list of all the way Steve "should be" and the implication that nothing but strict canon adherence could ever be a passionate, worthy exploration. It's... only fanfic? It's not real. They're not real. Nothing is real and everything is possible and that's supposed to be what's fun about it.

I write the characters very intensely, so yes, they are often out of character, sorry for... warning about that? I write different backgrounds for them and play with the negative space of possibilities and potential and i do this with authentic curiosity and passion because I love doing it and i get very into it. Sorry for warning about that too, I guess? When I first started writing in this fandom, some people pointed out to me that I could CW warn for them being OOC and that was new to me, i didn't think I had to warn for that. I thought people would read the tags, like in other fandoms, and understand that the story would do different things with the characters but it became clear that this was actually solid advice as this was a fandom obsessed with "canon adherence" and policing. So I thought I would CW as thoroughly as I could so no one would be shocked or disappointed and then maybe they wouldn't leave an essay of hate in the comments.

But ultimately, people like this would only be satisfied if I deleted everything and stopped writing. I barely participate in this fandom as it is beyond answering asks and writing. I don't rec my own work. The thing i don't ever want, and this is why it was worrying seeing something like YD becoming "popular", is for people to feel like they *should* read my work without having gone and looked for it via the tags. Without having found it naturally, just by browsing and thinking "that's definitely for me". I've only ever posted for small rarepairs in the past so a couple of comments on a fic always made me so happy. I write for myself and the few others in the world who might like it. I have never written for an audience. If you don't like something I wrote, it's not for you. Genuinely. Move along to the next, no? That's what I would do.

This was so spiteful and targeted. YD is so old at this point, I just don't understand people who do shit like this. I don't bother anyone and I try to be here for anyone who needs me. I CW as thoroughly as I can. I don't think I'm better than anyone. I think every single iteration of these characters is worthy and valid and what matters is how fun they were to write, for the author. I had so much fucking fun with these stories that seeing this miserable little rant seems pointless to me. I don't care if you didn't like it. I don't care if it wasn't to your taste. Writing it was what I wanted. Sharing it is secondary, always. It's fanfiction, written for free in my spare time. I didn't take up space, I didn't trample anyone. There is no reason for this beyond spite.

I am sorry about the vest/jacket mixup, however. Truly, genuinely from the bottom of my heart devastatingly sorry about that. I know it'll take time for people to forgive me and maybe no one ever will, I have to make my peace with that.

Anyway, thanks for loudly projecting your feelings onto me and my work.

💜💜💜

191 notes · View notes

bitimdrake · 1 year

Note

could you write a 20 page essay for me about the complicated dynamic between bruce wayne and dick grayson over the past 40 years of modern comics with cited comic panels

in hindsight I should have seen this coming

I mean the real thing about being flippant in a joke post is that I do not, currently, want to write 20 cited pages about anything, even the things I am deeply passionate about. I love the benefits of no longer being in school and refuse to give them up.

BUT Bruce and Dick oooof..... It's about not defining the relationship initially, because Bruce really didn't think of himself as a father and didn't understand what taking in a kid meant, and Dick was a kid who had no interest in a "replacement" father and thought it was normal to see himself as a peer to adults. It's about things you said when you were eleven haunting you a decade later because now your dad is never really going to be your dad even when he is.

It's about dancing around the words, "that's what it's like between fathers and sons" "you know exactly who i'm the son of" and "he's like a father to me" "he's like a son to me" and "your father talks about you" "you're raising that boy in your home / you're his father" but you can't actually SAY IT not directly.

It's about how your not-father is stoic and emotionally inexpressive and refuses to say how he feels, and you're ten years old and it's funny to say hello! I am Bruce's regular person translator! and hop around him with jokes while he grunts, and make yourself the light to his dark.

And then you're eighteen and your father is stoic and emotionally inexpressive and refuses to say how he feels, and it's not really funny anymore and he will never tell you he loves you.

It's about loving this new kid, and being jealous every time he just gets to be a kid. He just gets to be a kid. He just gets to be a kid. He doesn't have to be translator partner parent caretaker brother friend pal emotional-support.

You love your dad and you never want to see him again and you want your siblings to have better and you detest him.

You hate your dad and you throw all his flaws in his face and you would defend him to your dying breath and not regret it and never once doubt he was worth it.

He made you who you are. You are going to strangle him. Your friends would support you. Everyone would support you, except your little siblings, who are unfortunately not far behind you in mixed feelings. You just know him better than anyone.

It's about being the adult child of a parent, and how that's an adjustment in the most normal of circumstances, suddenly finding yourself on more even ground with someone who was once larger than life. Except you never really got to be a kid.

You love him. He should stop hurting you. He's more proud of you than anything else he's ever done. You should really take the advice you yourself gave to your most similar younger brother and stop considering him your responsibility.

He's your dad.

(anyway i've been trying to add tags for the relationships I am most interested in, and while it only goes back a little ways, that absolutely includes bruce & dick)

#*#ask #ace-kdj #anon #*dc #dc #dc meta #dick grayson #bruce wayne #bruce & dick #how do we feel about not that at all. but a one page unedited stream of consciousness ramble instead.#10to2

554 notes · View notes

bpd-blorbo-bracket · 5 months

Text

Hello and Welcome to the Borderline Blorbo Bracket! I've not seen one yet for us and that is a crime so I wanted to fix that. (You don't have to have bpd to submit!)

I'm Mod Izaya and I use He/It pronouns. [I am over 20]

Submissions: Closed. But will open again for more with enough demand.

Bracket: A-E Here. F-H Here. I-K Here. L Here. M Here. N, Finals Here.

+++++++++

Please read all rules and outlines before submitting, and please check the questions tag before sending in questions I will delete your question if I've already answered it in a previous ask. I will delete your submission if you didn't read the rules.

Tags to watch:

Mod Izaya: I'm talking freely - Questions: Answering your questions - Inbox: Stuff from the inbox regardless of content - Propaganda: For Propaganda - Conversing: Reblog chains with talking - Poll time- Polls questions once the poll starts

Rules and Submissions form Below:

Rules and Outlines:

Character doesn't have to canonically have BPD.

No submitting the same character more than once.

You can submit multiple characters, but make them different submissions

Submit them even if no one else has, They will get in anyway.

Please put their name and source exactly as it appears on the cover of the book/game with no added emojis

Don't beat down others in your propaganda, just have fun supporting who you're submitting

Propaganda doesn't have rules besides that! Write a little note or a long paragraph or an a fucking essay! Let people see what you see in them! Canon proof or strong hunch from a few clues are all good! I Am Serious All Propaganda is Good as long as it's TRUE.

If you've read this far, tell me your favorite food in the 🍰 Section.

No H*rry P*tt*r or Att*ck on T*tan or Real People (Media version of them are fine: ie: No Real founding fathers but I GUESS if you're evil someone from the play hamilton would count. I guess. Maybe no that specifically tho.

No T/rfs, r-df-ms, or n-zis allowed in poll or out :)

Have fun!

Submissions form:

tagging some other polls ive seen: No pressure to reblog

@killerrobot-killingmatch, @masked-character-competition @the-ballerina-battle @the-robot-bracket @gaslightgatekeepgirlbosscombat @irritable-bowel-showdown

#actuallybpd #actually borderline #character polls #bpd #borderline personality disorder #dont wanna spam but if anyones gonna have bpd characters and hcs my fellow bpd havers will #character bracket #tumblr tourney #mod izaya #polls

59 notes · View notes

luxuriousmalfoy · 7 months

Text

This or That

I was tagged by @felixantares TYSM FELIX FOR TAGGING ME!!!!!!!!!! It's been a million years and i'm awful for waiting this long lmao

Hardcover or Paperback? Paperback!!!! My hands cramp so quickly from hardcovers so the ones i have are either bc it was the only copy i could find at the used bookstore or just a copy i don't physically read from bc i also own the audiobook. (I'm looking at you, The Anthropocene Reviewed)

Bookstore or Library? EASILY the library, it's free and stimulates the community hello. I like Libby bc i can check out audiobooks and ebooks from my local library!!!!

Bookmark or Receipt? i have a bunch of cute bookmarks so sure i use those but like Felix i am a dog earer! idk it's just always an available option lmao

Standalone or Series? it's definitely less pressure to pick up a standalone bc i don't have to worry about feeling overwhelmed, but sometimes there will come a long series (cough, 39 clues) that i just get so obsessed with and have to binge read. AGAIN like Felix most of my favorites are in series!! BUT standalones are low presh

Nonfiction or Fiction? Fiction! I like the occasional memoir or essay collection or like history book or something, but GENERALLY i prefer to go for Fiction titles

Thriller or Fantasy? honestly thriller!! though i will clarify--i'm not that interested in adult thrillers for the most part. not to be reductive but the divorcee thrillers really bore me. i love a good YA thriller though, from slashers to murder mysteries i just love them!! some of my favorites are (ironically i'm about to list some series') A Good Girl's Guide to Murder, The Amateurs, and One of Us is Lying.

Under 300 Pages or Over? Also over! I do like a short read but between 300 and 400 pages is like the audiobook sweet spot for me honestly

Children’s or YA? YA/Middle Grade for sure!! My favorite book is Holes which is a children's book technically but yeah i freaking love some good YA Middle Grade books

Friends to Lovers or Enemies to Lovers? It depends on the genre for me honestly, but sometimes i think Friends to Lovers has higher stakes and as it stands that's what i would go for, though that could change at any given moment tbh

Read in Bed or Read on the Couch? I do most of my reading in the car technically bc i listen to audiobooks while i drive a lot lmao

Read at Night or Read in the Morning? Day time! It's too scary to read thrillers in the dark LOL

Keep Pristine or Markup? I am such a markup bitch i love to highlight and write notes in the margins fr!!!!!!! I annotate Holes at least once a year

Cracked Spine or Dogear? Majorly controversh but BOTH. I dogear all the time and i am a compulsive spine cracker. It's just too satisfying. But also I'll say i have not spent my whole life as a book person, so idek if i have more than like 2 books that i've had for more than like 3 years anyways

OKAY i'm tagging @vitaminpops @silently--here and @iammyownsaviour, if you've already done this obv ignore

#tag game #zeddmarker #luxuriousmalfoy

7 notes · View notes

tripleyeeet · 8 months

Note

I’m sorry for this rant but you reblogged my tags and I just… took that as permission to give you at least the slightly more detailed description (as opposed to the essay) of what I was thinking with those.

Your writing is not silly!! It’s really really good, and I am in love with the way you portray the depth of the characters. They’re real, they’re going through shit, they’re dealing with it in ways that may or may not make sense because, again, they’re real people! And I did absolutely notice how gently you handled the impacts trauma can have on wanting, or even allowing yourself to want. And not just sexual wanting, but any sort of wanting. And not needing to give permission to someone else but also needing to give permission to yourself!! And that it’s okay to both… want something but be uncomfortable with it. Or to not want something but want it so badly it hurts. And that there is no one single way to handle trauma. It was just beautifully done.

All that to say, I think you are an extremely talented writer, and I love seeing your name pop up on my dash. I’m very sorry you’re having a bad day, and my inbox/DMs are always open ❤️

okay but that's exactly what i was going for, so thank you.

i myself haven't read a ton of astarion fic because i've been so busy playing the game and writing a lover's folly but i know in other fandoms i've been apart of there's very little conversation about the impact of sex. both in and out a traumatic spaces.

obviously, i'm all for shameless smut and dark fic once in a while but even in fics where i've read the most emotional prose i've ever laid eyes on, it's very rare that the characters have a conversation about boundaries related to the bedroom.

most of the time i assume it's because the smut is the main focus in that moment, but i really do wish that more writers would take to time to show the sensuality that can be paired with consent.

because consent is sexy! it's beautiful and loving and further elaborates on characterization and dynamic and just all the good stuff when it comes to making everything real.

anyway, i don't know if any of that made sense. i'm just really passionate about building something that people can look at and feel something. so i'm glad in some way my writing managed to do that because if one person can read my work and think wow, they really did a good job with that, then that's all that matters honestly!

#again thank you #i love you #i appreciate you and your words

12 notes · View notes

cboffshore · 17 days

Note

Hey, just wanted to pop in and say I really enjoyed your essays on the Skybound rewrites! I was genuinely hooked (pardon the pun) on them the whole time, and it honestly terrified me to see that that was what you considered some of your *less* academic works 😅.

It's given me a whole lot to think about regarding my own views on Skybound (had forgotten a lot of those scenes happened), and fanfiction as a whole, especially since Ninjago is one of the few fandoms I've actually been there to experience. I also really enjoyed your writing style itself: you're very succinct and use metaphors to to convey your points brilliantly! Especially your introduction about hooks in writing transitioning directly into the way people start their fics? That was genius.

Sorry if I don't have a whole lot to say about your points qualitatively yet - it's been a long day and I'm going to have to sit on my thoughts a while, maybe reread those a couple of times. But I just wanted to say you're a fantastic writer, and that was one of the best written fandom metas I've seen :D

Before I respond properly, a note: this might be the first time I have EVER been called succinct. Definitely a welcome comment, but I sure didn't see that coming!

Anyway - I'm so glad you enjoyed it! Seriously! That essay series was written over the course of a very tense few weeks, where for some reason I was RIDICULOUSLY upset about the trend (iirc there was a sudden swell in updates on the case study fics and others and that's probably what did it). Fortunately, as with my Skybound fanfic and other analysis, I write best when I'm ticked.

That essay had been simmering for years, honestly. I never said it outright in the essay, but my baseline reason for writing it was a selfish one: I AM SO BORED. Skybound has all of these fascinating angles that so few people touch (one of these days I WILL make a recommended reading list for the works that do branch out!), and yet the vast majority of what I see is just... that. The gore, the litanies of tags, the same stuff played on the same stage with only a few minor tweaks. Eugh. (This goes for fanart too, btw - is it recognizably Skybound fanart if you don't have Jay bleeding from one or both eyes?)

I had better pivot before I go off again and start doing extended metaphors, but yeah - it's a bonkers topic for me. I love Skybound precisely because of how insane it is WITHOUT having to bury it under layers of headcanon, you know?

Once again - thank you so much!!! If you ever need someone to yak your ear off about Skybound, or if you've got any other questions about the essay, you know where to find me. (I'm also good company for the rest of Ninjago, but that's my area of expertise. That and a tiny specific chunk of Dragons Rising...)

#lila speaks #operation: sorrow is all the rage #analysis freak lila back on her bullshit #Ninjago Skybound

2 notes · View notes

aestheticsfandomsandmore · 9 months

Text

Thai QL Favorites Tag Game

Thanks @telomeke for tagging me (I’m @sharingfandoms, this is my main)!

(i’m only taking live action into account this once)

Favorite Thai QL: Bad Buddy The Series. It’s my favorite Asian show ever, actually, although I have watched some I found better handled on some aspects, or just less camp: nothing ever made me feel like Bad Buddy has, it’s my 2nd favorite show of all time (only Ted Lasso gets to rank higher).

Favorite Pairing: PatPran. Again, 2nd favorite pairing of all time (1st is clace from The Shadowhunters Chronicles), and my current obsession. I don’t know how to talk about them without writing a 10k words essay, so I better not even try.

Most underrated actor/actress: To be honest, I am not really aware of how much actors or actresses are loved by the fandoms, and I noticed most BL actors are really hyped regardless of their skills anyway, so I won’t answer to this one.

Favorite Character: Pran Parakul from Bad Buddy; again, I know this is going to be very BBTS-centred, but Pran became my 3rd favorite character ever, and my favorite within any Asian drama I’ve ever watched.

Favorite Side Character: I can’t just pick one this is gonna be hard. Ram and King from My Engineer, Kim from KinnPorsche, Ink and Pa from Bad Buddy, Yok from Not Me, Army, Joe and Mollie from The Warp Effect, Wat (Ik he’s not queer, but I really love him) from The Eclipse.

Favorite scene in a QL: I guess Pat and Pran’s kiss in episode 5, including their whole conversation before the kiss, gotta take the first place, but to be honest there are a lot of good scenes from almost every QL I’ve watched.

Favorite line in a QL: “What I do might not be able to change the world, but it surely changes my attitude towards the world. You might think one man can’t change the world, but I want you to know this world can’t change someone like me either.” From P’Tong in Bad Buddy.

Most Anticipated QL (& why): 23.5!!!! I can’t fucking wait! MilkLove are gonna slay and I’m so captivated by the plot.

Healthiest relationship in a QL: PatPran from Bad Buddy and RamKing from My Engineer.

Most toxic relationship in a QL: KinnPorsche and VegasPete from KinnPorsche and BonnDuen from My Engineer.

Most underrated series: The Warp Effect. Please, watch this show.

Guilty pleasure series: I never feel guilty for the stuff I enjoy watching lmao.

I tag @thegayneurodivergentagenda, @fiercynn, @hereforlou and @lovingtheshow, but sorry if you were already tagged by someone else; also literally everyone who wants to do this.

12 notes · View notes

musical-chick-13 · 3 months

Note

so what is this fic actually about?

oh god. okay I'm going to put this under a cut because of the topics involved.

Content warning for: discussions of consent (which includes mentioning non-con themes), discussions of intense kink practices, and references to cult-related trauma as per DW canon.

I will continue tagging all posts about this fic, as well as posting the fic itself, with "The Fic That's A Lot," as well as "c2g" which is an abbreviation of its title.

MINORS DO NOT INTERACT WITH THIS IN ANY WAY, I MEAN IT

I am going to be frank, this fic is about CNC. If you don't know what that is...well, it's highly probable this is not the story for you. But I will provide an explanation anyway if anyone's curious.

CNC stands for, in this context, "Consensual Non-Consent," which probably seems like an oxymoron. It refers to people roleplaying a fictional scenario where one of the parties involved pretends (key word pretends) to object to, protest, or otherwise not want to participate in a sexual encounter--this is what the "non-consent" part of the name refers to. Meanwhile, the other party pretends (again, key word pretends) to coerce the protesting party into some kind of sexual activity. The parties are, in a sex/kink situation, acting out a pre-agreed scene--which is what the "consensual" part of the name refers to, that pre-agreement--of non-consent.

It is important to note that this is not the same thing as actual assault: Boundaries are intensively discussed beforehand, and everyone involved decides together on a separate safeword and/or physical movement that anyone can use to end the roleplay scene immediately. Someone may be using words like "Stop" or "No" within the scene itself because they are playing the role of someone who does not consent to what is currently happening (akin to acting in a play or a movie, where an actor has to pretend to like or dislike or approve or disapprove or want or not want various things, regardless of whether any of that matches up with who they actually are as a person--in a CNC scenario, the people are playing characters, albeit in a much, much more intense way). But if something happens in this roleplay scene that someone does genuinely object to, there is a separate mechanism (sometimes several mechanisms) serving as a way out, fulfilling the function that something like "stop" or "get away from me" would fulfill in a non-CNC encounter.

ALL OF THIS TO SAY. The premise of this particular story examines how both of these characters (this is an 11/R fic, and I am trying very hard to make sure this post doesn't end up in the show or character tags) would get to the point where they realize this is something they want to do. And then, from there, once they've separately and individually realized that: What do they discover about themselves and their relationship in the process? How do they talk about it once it becomes clear that this is something they both want? How do they feel about wanting it? How does this interact with the woman in question having a background of, essentially, being brainwashed by a cult and having her childhood stolen? And how does this situation relate to how these characters view the concepts of control and romantic love? (Honestly, even more than the CNC itself, which is something that gets frequently maligned as romanticizing/normalizing abuse when people write about it, the most controversial part of this is that I put her in the sub role and not the dom role, lmao. Which I have a whole essay in my brain on why that is based on various lines/scenes/behavior in canon, but I don't think that's important right now and also this answer is already too goddamn long.) And then, in addition to all those aforementioned things, what are some of the other facets of their relationship outside of this?

Like I have mentioned at-length. This is. A lot. There's a reason the average person does not engage with CNC. And there is a lot of communication and set up that has to happen for this to work. (I had to do. SO much research for this.) But I want to confirm that nothing actually non-consensual happens in this story. He doesn't ever come anywhere remotely near hurting her (he doesn't even actually fantasize about anything, he just realizes he Has Some Particular Ideas and then feels really bad about them). And although I'm not going to spoil specifics, they both have a very positive experience with it.

I will say, though this is dual pov, more of it is from his perspective, and he is acting out the role of the aggressor. So that's another thing people need to be mindful of if they have an interest in reading this once it's up.

#The Fic That's A Lot #c2g #I am...not sure how to tag this #tw: cult mention #tw: cnc #tw: assault mention #tw: abuse mention #minors dni #minors do not interact #nsft #I *think* that's it? if there's something else I need to trigger tag for PLEASE let me know #I am going to be turning off anonymous asks after I post this answer #I don't anticipate the people who have been following this saga in detail sending a torch-and-pitchforks mob at me but random other #people might find this post through my blog & I don't trust random other people. like I said: when people write about this #there are LOTS of accusations thrown around about 'romanticizing/normalizing assault or abuse' regardless of how it's written #and I just do NOT have the energy for that lmao #(I mean people throw around those accusations about people who do this irl too #but no irl people ARE doing anything here because this is a story)#(and honestly I really just don't think I have the right to tell people what they can or can't do in their sex lives)#and also. someone's niche fic on ao3 doesn't '''owe''' potential readers the most Nuanced Discussion Of A Topic Ever #at the end of the day these are completely fictional characters and--by virtue of being. not real--nothing anyone does in writing #can ever hurt them. just tag all your stuff correctly and make sure you know internally what your own irl values are #and remember that sometimes people are just...going to have an interest in exploring shit that you're going to find weird.#but it doesn't involve you so you've got to practice going 'huh that's weird don't like that' and move on #(<-including myself in this I also need to practice this)

2 notes · View notes

13docwriting · 5 months

Text

'Ello! It's me again, giving my VERY long live stream review of Doctor Who, the Wild Blue Yonder.

(I don't do trailers or ANY spoilers for episodes, so it's an honest, gut reaction review RIGHT out of the gates for this one haha)

SPOILERS BELOW:

Once again, my first essay is this: I really, really miss watching it "live" with other fans. And, after a whole week of being active with the fandom, I've realized that spoilers are INSTANT. I couldn't watch this episode right when it was released on Disney plus and I was spoiled JUST by opening Tumblr to start this post. Could I have blocked the tags? Yeah, but I was going to watch the episode only three hours after it had went up, so I assumed I could avoid the worst of it. ANYWAY, my point stands... I'm really going to miss watching it with other fans because I have to make posts like this AND because spoilers are a problem.

NOW THEN.

1. HISTORICAL EPISODE. YES? PROBABLY? IS THAT GOING TO BE NEWTON??? OH HECK YES, THE APPLE FELL IT'S HIM. I looooooove DW historical episodes, oh my god.

2."But don't worry. He's got a time machine, which means he can blame me for all eternity." Donna Noble, stay sassy forever.

3. I CALLED NEWTON. Heck yes!!!!

4. Donna's and the Doctor's chemistry really reigns supreme to me. Now, I wouldn't necessarily pair Donna with 11th or 12th, the dynamic would be wildly different (huh, one day I'll write an essay about that), but the tenth Doctor needed Donna and the fourteenth Doctor appreciates that. It's really, really interesting and so lovely to see, honestly.

7. "The TARDIS played us a war song". Woah boy, here we go, PLOT.

5. It would be the Doctor to mess up history to THAT sort of extreme, wouldn't it lmao. "Mavity" to "gravity" is just too great. Aww, bye Newton! I wish we got more of him.

6. Yo the TARDIS is PISSED!!! Jeez, of course it's possible to have literally ANYTHING happen to the TARDIS, but I never consider "giant flame the likes of which a rocket could fly from" on the docket.

8. Ya know, I can't remember if I've ever seen the TARDIS's top light go on. And also, kudos to the TARDIS for the adorable "ding" noise when it did so, made me smile.

9. Bu-bu-budget. Holy. Cow. The space ship looks so good! Just insane.

10. Donna: "Was it me, or was Isaac Newton hot?" The Doctor: "He was, wasn't he... Oh, is that who I am now?" .... Donna: "well it was never that far from the surface, mate." RTD, as always, SAID "GAY RIGHTS" and I'm here for it. Very much reminded of the Doctor's infamous Shakespeare episode with Martha. "56 academics just punched the air"! But really, if I had heard a conversation like this when I was younger, I would be sobbing. Even if I'm a woman, just having a casual conversation in terms of liking the same sex is so valuable.

11. Why are we constantly losing the TARDIS. 13's era was also infamous for it.

12. Aww them fighting hurt... And you know what hurt more? Watching the Doctor comfort Donna. I mean, it was perfect, but it took SO LONG for the Doctor to be wiling to get there. I love character growth, even 15 years later.

13. "Go and kick its arse" HECK YES, DONNA. You got that right!

14. Doctor: "I know 57,000,000,205 [languages]." MY HEADCANON. Oh, my good old headcanon. So the TARDIS translates for humans but the Doctor knows the languages! I MEAN. It's confirmed!!! AH. I feel like some people would be disappointed by that but it's still cool to know that the Doctor DOES speak different languages. (Yo, my Academy Era fans, could you imagine the Doctor learning all that with the Deca? The Master is losing his mind as we speak.)

15. Once again, a million gold stars to everyone who did the music. It's so FULL.

16. This is a personal thing, but I love when the Doctor has moments that make the title "Time Lord" make sense. The whole "maybe time slowed down?" "No, I'd feel it in my bones." Like, YES, a Time Lord feeling that kind of thing makes sense, thank you!

17. "Allons, as idiots say, y!" oh my god Donna I'd marry you, I swear. Thank you for the sass. Also love the fact that Donna is driving the cart. No idea why, it just makes total sense.

18. Donna: "That's my family over there [one hundred trillion years away]". I have words about Donna having a family, I swear to you, but mostly it's this... Donna's dedication and love for her family is exactly what she needed in her life and I support her whole heartedly. It's beautiful, and perfect, and I do wonder how much of that dedication to keep her family safe comes from the Doctor.

19. I don't know if it's specifically a call back, but 14 licking the "dangerous" thingy felt like a 13 moment and I damn near teared up. Now, him faking being hurt by that? That was either 9 or 12, I can't decide lmao.

20. I'm about 25 minutes into the episode but I sincerely don't know what way this plot is going. We got a goal of "find the TARDIS by removing the danger", we've changed the word "gravity" to "mavity", and we're stuck at the edge of the universe... Love a good mystery, but I'm really wondering where this episode is going.

21. I'm unsure if David Tennant filmed the second season of Good Omens before or after DW, but I JUST saw Crawley's iconic swagger as he was walking away from Donna and I'm here for it haha.

22. I'm getting "half the ship inside a warm hole / Missy, the Doctor, and Bill's" plotline vibes. Does time move differently throughout the ship, just as Donna thought?

23. Donna: "Do you miss home? Gallifrey?" Doctor: "I suppose... But that got complicated." SAY IT, DOCTOR. Please, please, PLEASE. I'd love to hear that parts of 13's plotline live on, PLEASE. I know that's my desire, personally, but I'd kill for it. *Sigh*... But by being cryptic, it might make fans go back to watch her era, and I'd love that too.

24. Hmmm going off of #22... I'm thinking clones instead? OH NOT CLONES. NOT CLONES. Aliens! For sure aliens!

25. Can we talk about the cgi? I mean, it's pretty damn good considering what we had in the past. How crazy is that? Good cgi? Also, kudos to our main leads for their acting here! Always fun to see actors doppelgange themselves lol

26. I am SO FREAKED OUT RIGHT NOW. I didn't know this was a horror movie thing! It's December!

27. WE KEPT THE FLUX. WE K E P T T H E F L U X. We have the Timeless Child AND the Flux! We have the Doctor being so, so heartbroken about the Flux, out loud! Oh my god, I could cry. Really, I could give a great big shout. I know RTD mentioned that he was going to keep it, but he didn't have to do it so blatantly and make it a plot point! That's so, so g r e a t. AND- AND it leaves no room for discussion about 13's era! It still has continuality - it's engrained into the Doctor, even with a new writer and the next new writer and the next Doctor!!!! NO ONE CAN TAKE THE TIMELESS CHILD ARC FROM ME IF IT MEANS IT LIVES ON IN ANOTHER DOCTOR. HA.

I will write more about that because, really, it's so important to me. It such a small thing, but 13 Doctor fans can have a good cry tonight. It's so validating.

28. Oh wait, nope, hold on... Not done with point #27. The Doctor punching at the walls after hearing about the Flux and the Timeless child again? Screaming in rage, in pain, in everything that 13 couldn't do - that 13 refused to do, because she couldn't let anyone know she was hurting? 13 kept her walls so high that she tried to convince herself that everything was alright. 14 is the effects of that, a complete change, a metamorphous into that pain and I am LIVING for it. 13 couldn't scream, not properly, but 14 can.

29. Hehe. The Doctor's biggest strength, their intellect, needed to be squashed to save the day? Nope, no way, not in a million years could ANY Doctor do it. One single question and they've gotta solve it until it's done. Side note, if any reader can't tell, I am having a GREAT time. I may not have expect to be scared, but I'm loving it!

30. WILF. WILF. OH MY GOD. Aww wow, just amazing. Just amazing.

Summary: It's nothing like I ever expected. No one was given any hints about this episode and I find myself... Pretty happy with it. It's a convoluted plot, that's for sure, but it was fun as all heck. Scary! I mean, heart pounding, VERY close to the Midnight episode scary, but good! Random! Oddly randomly, I really don't know where to rank this episode. It feels a bit like it was thrown in just to have an episode, but that also doesn't necessarily make it bad.

I do think a lot of it was cushioned by some really good acting and characterization. The plot was slow going in a strange way, once again cushioned by nostalgia and everyone's need to see the tenth Doctor and Donna again. BUT, episodes like this make me excited (and nervous) to see how RTD is going to handle a brand new Doctor.

I will have a speech about RTD keeping the Timeless Child. A very long speech. But know that I, personally, am very thankful.

#Doctor who #wild blue yonder #doctor who wild blue yonder #dw #dw fandom #dw spoilers #Tori rants

4 notes · View notes