#anyway I am CRYINg In this Chili’s tonight | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

paperglader · 1 year

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Episode 52 thoughts:

1. I am LOVING this FRIDA & Imogen dynamic. I am loving the FRIDA & FCG dynamic, FRIDA and everyone dynamic. I love FRIDA.

Seriously, they’re AWESOME. I feel like they just arrived and flirted with everyone and was just the sweetest. Them and Deanna, too??? And their first meeting was so imodna coded😩

I’m obsessed. The coolest bb:

Can we keep them?

Anyways,

2. Loooooved Deanna. Love Aabria in general, tbh. She’s coming for me with this divorce backstory, so delicious. First Laerryn and Quay, now her and Chetney. I love her. Love that she’s making Travis play a romance storyline, too😂

Backstory was amazing, when she was talking about passing and the after life. Poetry.

The way she dealt with Imogen when she woke up from her nightmare made me melt as well🥲 my girl needs some soft people around her at all times (mostly now that she and Laudna have been separated) and I love that she’s meeting people that truly see and appreciate the good in her besides the hells.

3. Ashley freaking Johnson screaming for Imogen to come back from the dream ✨an actress✨ No, for real, it shook me to my core. Cause Fearne doesn’t scream like that. She was desperate. Fearne who just lost Orym, who just lost Ashton and Laudna. And it’s not the first time it happens either. Not too long ago, Orym and Laudna were gone and it was so close to being final. And now Imogen, the superhero, about to be consumed by the storm that she has spent a decade being haunted by and terrified over. These people that she’d grown to love in spite of her hesitance to form any sort of meaningful bond with anyone from this mortal realm, disappearing from her side, and she’s holding on tight but it seems to be like grasping on sand as they slip away from her fingers one by one. Trauma is very much present in this Chili’s tonight.

4. “I got lightning titties!” please someone put it on the Imogen temult once said compilation 😂

5. Loving these new characters making FCG question his faith even further. Generally, I love the back and forth about what they should actually do about the gods, talks of faith and fate. I am here for it.

6. “Smirks in monster fucker” another star quote of the episode.

7. Imodna is constantly at the forefront of my mind and Laura Bailey delivered, as expected. Immy was literally crying any time that anyone showed her any form of kindness or affection. The girl was so sensitive🥲

The sendings, the urgency, the stuttering and how she kept trying, the Whitestone is for lovers T, “I hate not knowing”, her reaction to hearing FRIDA and Deanna’s first meeting, when she was like “this is the first time that we haven’t woken up to Orym doing push ups OR…” and she got so freaking sad. How she looked for her in her dreams, how she touched the red tether right before she went to sleep.

In summary: I’m loving this separation arc so far and I cannot wait for Laudna’s side of things.

8. Ship talk: FRIDA and Deanna are SO imodna coded, it’s crazy and I adore them. They love each other so much. But ALSO, imodna is my endgame but I would not be upset if we get to see something develop between FRIDA and Imogen. I just think that it would be interesting to see Imogen explore something with someone that is more emotionally available at the moment.

I’m not saying they could fall in love or like become endgame material or something cause I do believe that Imogen’s in love with Laudna and that it’s highly likely that she’s aware of it. Also, her priorities are very much on finding her and she’s very much heartbroken by the distance between them, so she is not looking for romance with anyone else at the moment.

(And also, the world is ending sort of)

But FRIDA is so freaking sweet and Imogen’s having an honest to god hard time, and Laudna’s so freaking far (they’re soulmates, they’ve professed their love for one another, but they’re not… romantically entangled? Are they? Imogen has not said anything and she doesn’t know if laudna feels that way, if she’s even capable of ever feeling that way…)

I wouldn’t blame FRIDA if they became infatuated with Imogen, and I just think that Imogen deserves to be called beautiful and wonderful and good and some harmless flirting would just be nice to see.

It’d be a little like Yu and Laudna, just sort of a reminder of what some of those aspects of a romantic relationship would look like for them. It’d definitely be a “my heart belongs to another” type of thing but also it could be harmless and sweet.

Anyway, none of this probably will happen because FRIDA has chemistry with literally everyone and I’d like to see any version of that anyway.

#we didn’t really get any answers this ep but it was great and I actually love the route they’re deciding to take with the solstice #i will miss marisha ray on my screen but it’s alright she’ll be back #critical role #imodna #bells hells #c3 #campaign 3 #spoilers #campaign 3 spoilers #c3 spoilers #critical role spoilers #cr spoilers #laudna #imogen temult #fearne calloway #apogee solstice

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itspileofgoodthings · 3 years

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Today I am thinking about the fact that when Romeo receives the news of Juliet’s death (“death”) he just shuts down. The words on the page almost seem cold and empty; they have none of his usual flair or fire. And you’re almost tempted to ask “does he even . . . care?” and then you realize that he can’t hold a thought in his head to its conclusion, that he can’t focus on one thing at a time, that he speaks in short fits and starts because he’s utterly wrapped in a dark fog of despair, the likes of which he’s never known before. He can’t be dramatic because he’s ALWAYS dramatic; this hits and hurts him so much more profoundly than anything he’s ever known and words are truly not enough to express the depths of his sorrow or despair. And so he clings to blind and violent action as his instant recourse.

And it’s masterful (and gutting) the way that Shakespeare turns his usual eloquence on its head like that and takes away his ability to put into words what he’s losing. It’s transformative, and not for the better or the more beautiful. In an awful way, Juliet’s death hardens Romeo instantly into a man not a boy: a man of action, violence, and despair. Grief alone has been able to transform him into the kind of man Verona and this feud have expected him and pressured and raised him to be: a man whose only response is violence. He uses all his remaining wits and strength and purpose to go to her tomb. And there is something about his journey to her that is that of the bird flying home to its nest because there is still something about Romeo that is a boy (only the love twisting into grief in his heart) but there is also something about his journey that is that of a man running straight off a cliff into a pit of snakes, into the arms of violent destruction, because love itself has finally died and nothing else remains.

#romeo and juliet #this is. TOO MUCH FOR ME #and obviously Romeo is not RIGHT #but if Juliet is dead he is right that love is dead #no one else in the PLAY knows what love is like she does #because the families (and as Maria said yesterday even the Prince!!!) have been steeped in violence so long #also his grief reminds me of Macbeth’s when Lady M dies #at first you’re like ‘really? that’s all you have to say?’ and then you realize #anyway I am CRYINg In this Chili’s tonight

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thebrotherskaramazovs · 2 years

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@smilehoneyy the day shattered edges glistening comes out will be the day i die……..

#you don’t understand how excited i am actually #i reread every snippet and i think i’m going to cry #i just think everyone should go read nellie’s fics like there is no question #especially the spark that lights the fire #i will legiterally promote that fic as if it were my own cause it’s the best thing i’ve ever read #anyways. feeling my little pony Friendship Is Magic in this chili’s tonight #nellie tag #min.txt

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calwasfound · 3 years

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i am DECEASED cal your art is. h. is it possible to have brainrot for someone's art style??? Oh my god fhjcdcj it's so colourful and sharp (is that a word used to describe art? probably not) a d fuckin HDUCUEICKSIDR i like it a lot sbxb ik I've said this a lot on the discord server but your art really is amazing I hope u are very very proud

oh my first of all... thank you SO SO much...... it’s the comments like these that really make me go :,] about my art !!! i’m so so glad you like it and that it’s developed into something i’m proud of !! i hope you have a wonderful day and i’m so so happy you like what i create :DD <3

#cal answers #i am going to cry in this chilis tonight /pos #also a note.. are we in the same discord server?? i'm VERY bad with lurking i'm so sorry if we are and i don't recognize you LOL #anyways AHH this was so sweet it made me so so happy oh my

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wickermallow · 4 years

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. but like, a positive . this time

#can you imagine being the type of person who is comforted by just being reassured that it's okay to dream big #I'm feeling big clown honk in this chili's tonight #because like #ok so this requires context of basically me having not wanted a romantic relationship until this time in my life and then suddenly my whole #body crying and freaking out and physically breaking down because of how bad I want one (that's sad!! that's sad)#anyway I been struggling with that for a bit now #oh god since february already???? shame #struggling because I know my standards are gonna be Pretty Specific and Rare in american society especially because I just don't value #a lot of what americans value #or at least it feels that way #and I've been hand wringing over the feeling of 'maybe I should just get rid of even hoping for meeting an ideal someone and not even try'#and I've been agonizing for like a week and half of pure despair kJHSF #literally all the bad energy just cleared up cuz I realized that the cynical voice in my head belonged to my mom #and someone told me to shut up and accept maybe My Type exists out there and try before giving up #boom done #now I just am going to hope out of pure spite because my mom doesn't tell me what to do #not even from my own psyche #shut up mom I'm gonna meet My Type and live well #maeposting

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postmodernmulticoloredcloak · 3 years

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And now I’ve watched episode 3 of Walker because of reasons. (You guys asked, that’s reasons.) #2

If you guys haven’t seen part 1, go see it immediately. Because of reasons. This time, reasons is Slutty Glitter Cowboy Stripper. No, it’s not a joke.

Yeah, I’m not sure what’s happening either.

I can’t believe they’re airing cowboy strippers in Supernatural’s air slot and Dean Winchester isn’t there. I think this is why they had to kill Dean, because otherwise he would have ripped through the CW’s show layout and appeared in Walker sponteneously, instantly adopting Walker’s entire family and friends as his own and single-handedly implementing the depolicement of the state of Texas, with Castiel rolling his eyes at him in the background while he murders ICE agents at the US-Mexican border.

*slides the CW a twenty euro bill* so I have an idea for season 2 of Walker

Anyway, there’s this lady Walker and Ramirez are doing a stakeout on, a woman called Torreto who is presumably part of some criminal organization since they’re doing a stakeout on her, and who’s bisexual given she was being entertained by a lady and a guy at a strip club. Which is like, fine, not problematic at all, alright.

So the stripper straddles her and is like ~wanna come with me in the back, and she’s like ~maybe another time, and he’s like ~torreto i saw cops outside you probably wanna come to the back with me, and she’s like ~mmm yeah that sounds like a good idea. We were rooting for you, slutty glitter cowboy stripper! We were all rooting for you! Or not.

Meanwhile, Walker has horrible car manners.

Also, he asks her how her parents were to her growing up, which is a question you normally ask to people you’re not close to when you want to do some small talk. For some reason she brings up a friend she had some ~crazy teen years~ with, called Garrison, which doesn’t make me think of angels in Supernatural, no, I am a normal person.

But then people start coming out of the strip club, but not Torreto. So they go in.

Torreto is not there, so Walker just stops the first person he sees and he’s literally like ~excuse me, do you know if there’s someone in the back. The visual is hilarious

“Excuse me, sir, have you seen my brother from another show, I suspect he might be here”

Give me a spinoff about this strip club.

Anyway, the guys answers, “No, why, you two interested?” to which they immediately answer “no!” at the same time, and share a look which makes me think we’re supposed to be like ~~ooh, talking in unison moment! or something...?

Meanwhile their truck gets stolen, and Walker yells that his bobblehead is in there. Cue disgruntled Jared face.

Oh man. We are at the title card. It’s less than 6 minutes. This will never end.

It was night, now it’s day, and Stella and August are walking around Austin. He’s mimicking David Attenborough, describing the teenagers around them as though he was doing a documentary about animals.

Two girls approach them, bringing up a party that’s taking place tomorrow. She says it’s not the best idea with her court date approaching. The girls are like, your dad can figure something out, he’s an elite ranger or something and also owes you for disappearing for a year. She’s like, he’s being kind of cool, I don’t want to ruin this, and the girls “call BS” because this is like “the best party of the year”.

Ruby, the girl August has been hanging out with, appears and August goes from “nah the party is not my thing” to “I’ll totally be there” in like 0.02 seconds.

I cannot overstate how much I am not interested in high schooler drama.

Meanwhile, at the Walker Seniors’ place, Walker’s parents are preparing the table for a family dinner. From their banter we can infer someone’s who ~is like family although he isn’t “blood”~ is coming for dinner and Grandpa Walker doesn’t like him at all and actually expects the guy to steal their china and bourbon. “It’s been years, could you please give him a chance?” Grandma Walker says, and he accepts, although she grabs the fancy bourbon from behind his back.

Meanwhile, at the police station, all the cops are having a briefing about Torreto, the woman at the strip club. She apparently steals weapons all over Texas and sells them over the border at triple the cost. Remember that Torreto escaped from Walker and Ramirez because she stole their truck while they were inside the strip club. Ramirez is worried she’ll already become the laughingstock of the precinct.

Uh. James plays security camera footage from outside the strip club. Walker and Ramirez’ truck was stolen by Torreto and the cowboy stripper himself.

Obviously the other cops laugh when Ramirez admits it was her truck.

James tells them to find Torreto, find the truck, and find out who the naked cowboy is.

I have a bad feeling about this.

Then Walker drives home, and as soon as he gets out of his car, you know how in the Supernatural pilot Dean gets into Sam’s apartment and wrestles him before revealing it’s him to ~test if his fighting skills are rusty and laughs when Sam realizes it’s him? Alright, now think intensely and guess how Walker’s like-a-brother best friend is introduced. Think intensely! It’s really difficult to guess!

Something something about violence and male intimacy except this is too ridiculous to, you know, write something serious about it.

“Oh, man!” the guy laughs, lying on the ground where Walker threw him. “The look on your face!”

“You son of a-”

“Oh, c’mon man, don’t talk bad of a mother I never knew.”

I’m facepalming soooo hard. This is the first thing we learn about him (well, after the fact that he definitely stole something from the Walkers’ house in the past), that he never knew his mother!

HOLY FUCKING SHIT

GUYS

I AM SO SORRY

I am faceblind I didn’t realize

THE GUY IS THE STRIPPER

I REPEAT

THE “DEAN BUT IN JARED PADALECKI’S MIND” CHARACTER IS THE SLUTTY GLITTER COWBOY STRIPPER

THIS IS NOT A DRILL

I SWEAR MY HANDS ARE COLD AND CLAMMY

I AM EXPERIENCING EMOTIONS NO WORDS EXIST IN THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE TO DESCRIBE

Oh my god guys. I am so sorry.

“You did your touchdown victory dance before you stole my partner’s truck!” Walker exclaims. “I should arrest you right here and right now!”

The guy acts like he has no idea what Walker is talking about, and says he’s in town to see his best pal.

Walker keeps accusing him, but then his mother appears, super thrilled to see him, and Walker lets is go.

They’re at dinner (NotDean brought wagyu steaks, which obviously means he does crime for a living) and Walker’s mother tells him to say grace, which he does in a semi-serious, semi-mocking way. Obviously NotDean does not believe in god, but he’s grateful for the people around him.

Stella calls him uncle, in case you missed that this is supposed to be a friend whom Walker loves likeabrother.

He talks about jobs he did here and there, and Walker and his brother tease him asking if he’s been to some prisons around the country. Stella doesn’t get the joke and NotDean explains it to her, adding, “now, from what I hear, I’m not the only outlaw in this family”. Grandpa Walker leaves the room.

NotDean asks Stella if she’s going to the bonfire (the party they were talking about earlier) and tells her that her mother started the thing when they were young. She didn’t know that. This is supposed to be a Meaningful moment.

Meanwhile the stolen truck is found... at Walker’s ranch. Gasp! What a shocking turn of events.

NotDean gives Stella advice on how to act in court to get on the judge’s good graces, “which means acting”. “Please don’t get legal advice from a criminal” walker’s brother Liam says. Is the gay brother also a NotDean of sorts, to be fair? Well, CriminalNotDean tells her to dress her best and cry. ActualbrotherNotDean tells her to use the correct legal arguments. Walker just stops them, quoting something Ramirez said earlier in the episode, “nobody benefits from the easy route”. Stella is like, what does that mean, which, mood, but Grandma Walker interrupts bringing in a plate of different hot chilis. Apparently they have a tradition of a competition. Which we don’t even see. Boo.

Ramirez finds the truck... right outside the Walkers’ house. Grandpa Walker, who’d gone outside, points a rifle to her and she explains what she’s doing there. They introduce themselves and she is like, sir why is the man who stole my truck inside your house? “Wife invited him to dinner.”

She’s like, I need to arrest him. But he’s like, I bet there’s not enough evidence to arrest him, or my son would have done it. Join me for steak and burbon in the bunkhouse! As one does. So they have wagyu and bourbon together, and she asks him what’s the guy’s story.

So NotDean and Walker grew up together, NotDean had a rough life, “my wife has a soft spot for strays, she can’t give up on him”. But Grandpa Walker doesn’t feel the same. He tells her that she cannot arrest him tonight, but it’s only a matter of time before the guy gives her enough rope. He adds that Walker has a blind spot for faces from the past, and needs someone to fix that.

Meanwhile dinner’s over and NotDean calls a uber. He and Walker arrange to meet the next day and hang out like old times. Eventually, Walker tells him that if he is involved in this case, he will have to take him down. “Theoretically, if you catch me.” They do a manly hug with manly pats, and the guy leaves. “Theoretically, go to hell,” Walker says after he’s left.

The next day, NotDean brings Walker to a storage in the middle of nowhere... full of cursed objects, no wait, wrong show. What’s inside the storage is the red Mustang. Walker is shocked that he hasn’t lost it in some bet - which apparently is how he got the car from Walker in the first place. Now NotDean says that, after everything Walker’s been through, he deserves a chance to win it back.

Glowy flashback of Walker and his wife in the car, right after the scene in the beginning of the episode. They bet it during poker night, decision of Emily, because Walker is “starting to get attached to her”. Emily teases him for calling the car a she, and Walker decides to call the car Stella.

They gave their daughter the name of a car they lost at poker.

Oh. She tells him she’s pregnant.

So, apparently, they had their first daughter when they were broke, to the point they had to try and get money at poker for a bigger place and baby things. That’s... kind of irresponsible.

Meamwhile, Ramirez goes to James to tell him about the thing, but James already figured NotDean was involved, because apparently stealing things and returning them is just something he does. “Why are you so calm about this?” she asks. He says because they cannot pin anything on him. Questioning him could scare the big crime lady. So he tells her to just keep an eye on him. “Walker, Torreto or Hoyt [NotDean]” she asks. “Yes” he answers.

Blah blah. I apologize, I’m being too detailed. I’m just bored by this. Ah, a butcher’s truck was stolen right after the strip club thing, guess where NotDean got the wagyu steaks.

Walker and NotDean go to the bar with the bartender who’s their friend, and NotDean flirts with her. They start playing poker, when Ramirez arrives, and has some banter with NotDean and spills some glitter on him that she found in the truck. He buys her a drink and she arrests him for trying to bribe a police officer. Walker is shocked.

At the precinct, he says they cannot prove he’s working with big crime lady. But she brings up he stole the wagyu steaks.

She calls him out for trying to be everyone’s friend even if they do something wrong, also with Stella.

She says she can hold NotDean for 24 hours, long enough to figure out the big crime lady’s plans. Common trope in cop shows. Arrest someone without proof, you have to release them after 24 hours, but the cop finds proof and bam, forgiven for arresting someone without proof.

I know you’re bored, I’m bored too.

Actually, nope, it goes differently and kind of worse. In the interrogation room, Ramirez offers NotDean a deal: he tells her where the big crime lady’s weapon deal is happening, and walks free. He points the location on a map and he compliments her. Walker is watching from the cameras and is shook.

Meanwhile the bonfire is happening, and Stella is there with her girl friends. So is August, breakdancing to impress girls. We don’t care.

Meanwhile, a lot of cops in serious cop gear surround the location NotDean pointed at. Nobody’s there, though.

What is there, is the red Mustang with the creepy bobblehead in it and a letter from NotDean that says he gives him the car back because it was always his wife’s.

Walker figures out where the deal is actually happening - the storage where the red Mustang was before.

Meanwhile, at the bonfire, August is drunk on booze he stole from Grandpa Walker and brought to the party. He asks Stella if she’s trying to drive their father away, breaking the law and all, he asks if she wants him to leave again. Then he throws up. She calls Walker but he obviously doesn’t answer. So she calls her uncle, who’s doing shopping with his partner or something. They’re buying cake? Doing cake testing for their wedding? Maybe.

Meanwhile, NotDean calls Grandma Walker to tell her he cannot go mushroom hunting with her tomorrow but needs to leave town, and he’s sorry to let her down again. She tells him that just because his family’s bad, doesn’t mean he is too. “You saved my boy, and I’ll never forget that” she says. Oooh, that’s so intriguing!, nobody says. They share a cute moment and then he hangs up, while the weapon deal goes down around him.

Uncle Liam and his partner pick up the kids, and Stella asks him if he’ll be in court with her tomorrow. He says he can’t, because it’s her father’s decision to make.

August turns up music and they all sing in the car. It’s funny how everyone’s got better chemistry with everyone else except with Walker. I know it’s, like, on purpose for plot reasons, but still, Walker’s interactions with everyone feel so stilted compared to anyone else. And it’s not the other characters are that compelling.

The police arrives at the location of the weapon deal, and NotDean gets arrested trying to steal the truck again. Ramirez gives a speech how that’s hard but it’s the right thing to do. Walker makes a comment about tough love, implying Stella needs to get that too.

The next day, they leave for Stella’s court thing on the red Mustang. It took Walker three episodes, but now they also have a cool classic car to show off! Yay! *eyeroll*

Meanwhile, Grandma Walker and Grandpa Walker have a conversation about their failing marriage or something.

Ramirez goes to the bar to apologize to the bartender for arresting NotDean. They have a drink together and if lesbians were watching this they’d start shipping them, but no lesbians are watching this. They’re wiser than me.

Stella got like a gazillion hours of community service and her license suspended. She’s upset, but since she has her license for one more day he teaches her how to drive the Mustang.

Wait. Americans don’t learn to drive normal cars when they get their license?? They only learn to drive cars with automatic gear?? What the hell??

They drive while August runs after the car to get over his hangover or something.

Would be a cute moment if the entire thing wasn’t so cheesy and weird.

Well. We know NotDean is a recurring role so we’ll see more of him. (Well, I’m not sure I will be there to watch, because this is boring af.)

This episode used all its interest coins in the strip club scene and then became dreadfully boring. I don’t even have some witty line to close this post.

This was a rollercoaster that went my brain go through a blender in the first six minutes or so and then killed the remaining braincells through boredom.

That’s it guys. What can I say. This is the CW’s Walker. Yee.

#marghe watches walker for some darned reason #cw's jared: legit texan

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hatterstan-shameblog · 3 years

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For the headcanon thing

I think Hatter likes to watch bad movies. Like the really bad ones. The ones that make you roll your eyes/laugh/cry at every single thing about it, doesn't matter if it's plot or acting. But you know what he loves more than watching those awful movies alone?

Watching them with someone else.

"hey, Mori, wanna watch a movie?"

"...no."

"c'mon, you'll like this one."

"no, I won't."

"...no, you won't. But I will enjoy your presence. C'mon bro, do it for the sake of bonding time."

"*sigh* fine..."

(inspired by real life events)

💕 Sleepover 💕

Rating: PG13 for language and alcohol consumption

Relationship: Takeru (Hatter)/Aguni

Tags: banter, friendly insults, Just Guys Being Dudes, drinking, swearing, love confessions (sort of), They Talk A Big Game But The Love Is There

Bangbangbangbangbang!

“Mori!”

Bangbangbangbangbang!

“Moooooori, let me iiiiiiiiiin!”

Clunk!

Click!

Creeeeeeaaaaaak!

Aguni opens his apartment door, wincing at the slap of summer heat that greets him as he does.

“C’mon man,” an overheated and impatient Takeru implores, “it’s miserable out here!”

“You bring me samosas,” Aguni asks, crossing his arms across his chest, “Because I’m not letting you in without my samosas.”

Takeru’s face twists into a look of shocked indignation.

“Would you really leave me—your best friend on this beautiful green Earth—to swelter and die on your doorstep in this blazing summer heat…all because I forgot the samosas?”

Aguni considers.

“No. I’d ask you to swelter and die in the parking lot. Neighbors’ll kick up a fuss if you block the stairwell.”

“Well it’s a good thing I got two orders this time,” Takeru shakes the bag enticingly, “so we don’t even have to share.”

“Someone’s splashing out,” Aguni murmurs, taking the bag from Takeru’s outstretched hand and standing aside so the man can enter his home, “Don’t suppose there’s a reason for all this…”

“Maybe I just wanted to be nice,” Takeru says flippantly, toeing off his shoes, “a little ‘thank you’ for welcoming me into your home.”

Aguni carries the bag of food over to his coffee table and sets it down, being careful not to disturb the place settings he had so thoughtfully arranged. Two plates, two spoons, two glasses of water—all neatly placed in the center of his new, sage-green placemats.

Hopefully nobody spills curry on them.

“You brought one of your weird movies again, didn’t you?”

Takeru rolls his eyes. Shoving his arm into his messenger bag, he rummages around its contents for a moment before yanking a dark, thin rectangle and holding it up for Aguni to examine.

“The 1977 horror classic, House,” he explains with an edge of exasperation, “is a critically-acclaimed work of art that has been inspiring both film fanatics and the average man for nearly half a century.”

“Straight from the back of the box,” Aguni mumbles, opening the stapled-shut paper bag and peeking at the containers inside, “Anyways, I thought you didn’t like scary movies.”

Takeru scoffs.

“Not sure what gave you that idea,” Takeru says, shoving his feet into his slippers—yes, his slippers, black velvet with red-and-gold dragons embroidered on the front because ‘I’m here enough to warrant my own damn slippers’ and ‘these are fucking awesome,’ “We saw Hereditary in the theater!”

“And you were scared the whole time,” Aguni points out, gingerly lifting their food out of the bag and arranging the containers on their respective plates, “You had to sleep with the lights on for a week. Screwed up your cat’s sleep schedule and everything.”

Takeru swans his way over to Aguni’s refrigerator and opens it, more or less sticking his whole head inside to examine its (admittedly meager) offerings.

“It’s not my fault that Ziggy is such a smart, beautiful boy who knows what ‘lights out’ means. And besides,” Takeru says while examining the bottle of white wine Aguni had put in to chill, “I’ll be staying here tonight, so it won’t be an issue.”

“So the cat gets to sleep, but I don’t?”

“You, my dear, get a evening of my company, complete with scintillating conversation, cultural enrichment, and—as we have already established—your very own order of samosas,” Takeru calls out from the kitchen, rummaging for a suitable pair of wine glasses, “And besides, I plan on sleeping deeply and comfortably knowing that any and all monsters would no doubt eat you first, giving me ample opportunity to flee the scene…”

Aguni lifts the lid off his curry, admiring the rich yellow hue and inhaling its bold spices. There are even a few extra chilis lying on top, which is a lovely surprise.

Takeru arrives at the table, glasses in one hand and wine in the other. He gives the spread a discerning once-over and then a nod of apparent approval.

“Anyways,” Takeru says, twisting off the top of the wine bottle (not without giving Aguni a look of distaste as he does it), “I’m a bit disappointed in you, Mori-chan. I thought you’d fight me more on this one…”

“It’s a losing battle,” Aguni concedes, sitting himself down in his usual spot and turning on the television, “I have too many brain cells and not enough patience to go through the usual theatrics.”

Takeru hands him a generously-full wine glass—not as full as his own, of course, but still more than what the average person might pour.

“This’ll help the brain cell problem,” he says with an over-enthusiastic smile, “probably the patience, too. Wine makes you sentimental.”

“Hmph.”

“See? It’s already working.”

“Yeah, well,” Aguni grumbles, taking a small sip of his beverage, “better get the movie started before I change my mind.”

Takeru begins his usual indignant grumbling as he fumbles with the DVD player. Aguni could help him, but, frankly, it’s entertaining to watch his friend struggle with the simple electronic setup.

When Takeru manages to get the tray open, he gives a small cheer of victory. Aguni stifles a smirk.

Hopefully the movie is this much fun.

🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸

“Mori. Hey, Mori-chan.”

Aguni rolls his eyes, and then himself onto his side to face Takeru.

“What,” he grumbles, squinting in the dark as he tries to make out the other mans’ shape, “piano thing still got you upset?”

“It ate her fingers, Mori,” Takeru whisper-shouts, “and then it got the rest of her too! That’s enough to upset anyone!”

“It wasn’t even that scary,” Aguni mentions, shimmying his shoulders in order to find a more comfortable spot on his futon, “besides, you don’t even play piano, so you don’t have to worry.”

Takeru is silent for a moment—a blessed, beautiful moment.

“I guess you’re right,” he says after his brief contemplation, “but that’s not the only thing on my mind.”

“I’m guessing ‘sleep’ isn’t one of ‘em?”

Takeru scoffs. There’s a shuffling and fluttering sound from his neighboring futon as he turns to face his disgruntled companion.

“In due time,” Takeru says, “what plagues me now is more of a philosophical question.”

Aguni sighs.

“Remember the part where that guy got turned into a pile of bananas?”

“Yeah,” Aguni responds, “that was weird.”

“What if that happened to me,” Takeru asks, sounding genuinely concerned, “would I turn into a pile of bananas, or would I be a different kind of fruit?”

Oh, you’re different alright, Aguni thinks to himself, but he knows better than to say that out loud. Takeru’s using his ‘this is going to keep me up all night unless you give me a good answer’ voice, so Aguni starts thinking about how best to answer.

“I think you’d be melons,” Takeru concludes, “yeah…definitely melons.”

“Because of my round head and lack of hair?”

“No,” Takeru snaps, “well, that wasn’t my original thinking.”

Aguni subtly checks his phone—half-past one o’clock in the morning, too late to send Takeru home on a train to ask his cat these burning questions instead of him.

“Why,” Aguni asks, “do you think I’d be melons?”

“Well, like you, melons are strong and tough on the outside. Make a nice thud sound when you smack ‘em.”

“So do I,” Aguni mentions, “if you get the right spot. But I also hit back, so that’s not very melon-y, is it?”

“Hm. I suppose not. But,” Takeru says, “where you really start to resemble the melon is on the inside.”

“Inside, huh?”

“Yeah,” Takeru considers for a moment, “underneath all that tough rind, melons are soft. Sweet, too. Nothing fancy, they’re not trying to prove anything, they’re just…good. Like you.”

Aguni hadn’t been expecting something so…sentimental. It’s a touching departure from their usual quips and playful jabs, and it makes something warm and kind of familiar bubble up in Aguni’s heart.

“And also,” Takeru tacks on, “they’re green. And green is your favorite color! So it’s perfect.”

“I think you’d be a strawberry,” Aguni says after a beat.

“A strawberry? You mean only one?”

“Only one,” Aguni confirms, “but one of those fancy designer ones, the kind they grow in those hydroponic farms and sell in department stores for thousands of yen.”

“I heard about a guy who got murdered at one of those places,” Takeru says, “some yakuza guy who was selling weed on the side, someone put a hit out on him and used the body for fertilizer.”

“That’s…disturbing,” Aguni replies, “but that’s beside the point. Don’t you want to know why I think you’d be a single strawberry?”

“Is it because they’re red?”

“Sort of,” Aguni says, “Got a lot of seeds, too. Get stuck in your teeth pretty easily, if you’re not careful.”

“I am rather tenacious.”

“You are.”

Aguni considers his next words carefully. His relationship with Takeru is…complicated, and uncertain, and if anyone ever asked him what they ‘are’ he wouldn’t know how to answer.

“Strawberries are sweet. They’re sour, too. You’d know the flavor anywhere. And you…”

He pauses. Takeru, for once, doesn’t try to fill the silence with his own voice.

“…Well, those designer strawberries are all one-of-a-kind, just like you. So that’s why there’s one one,” he says slowly, “and I like strawberries. Might even, uh…love ‘em.”

“Oh, Mori…”

Something flops onto Aguni’s blanket—once, twice, and ah, it’s Takeru’s hand, and he’s looking for something. Aguni slips his arm from under the covers and covers Takeru’s hand with his own. This is apparently what Takeru had been searching for, because he pulls Aguni’s hand closer to himself.

“You know,” Takeru says, “now that you mention it, I think I might love melon, too.”

Aguni feels lips against the back of his hand—a soft kiss, gentle, a reassurance as much as an act of affection—and he’s glad for the dark of night that hides the blush of his cheeks.

“I feel better now,” Takeru announces, giving Aguni’s hand a light squeeze, “In fact, I think I’m falling asleep as we speak…”

“Hmm,” Aguni hums in agreement.

He’s still holding Takeru’s hand, and Takeru, his—neither seem too keen on letting go, at least, not for now.

#alice in borderland #hatter #danma takeru #alice in borderland netflix #imawa no kuni no alice #imawa no kuni no arisu #writings and such #aguni morizono #hatter/aguni #I didn’t go with ‘bad’ movie per se but like…..if you’ve seen it you know #‘house’ is a FUN movie and I like it very much #I tried not to spoil too much in case you wanna watch it yourself!!!#we need more of them being cute together

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sadedlife · 2 years

Text

CW:177 (tw ed related talk)

I totally caved in and binged today and I didnt even realize until I was full and I knew I was full but I kept eating. I realized yesterday that a contributing factor to my binging was always being told as a kid and now that if I don’t finish my food I was wasting money or something. Again I’m not trying to blame anyone else I’m just trying to figure out why I am like this and people like my friend aren’t. But like if I go to chilis with my grandma and we had a heavy breakfast I won't be that hungry. But at chilis I always order the same thing. A full adult serving of Texas cheese fries. Which here's a little side not I realized I could help with my overeating by ordering like half orders or kids meals. But Ill order my cheese fries and if I only finish half she’ll be like are you going to take that home? And I hate reheating food it never hits the same except maybe Olive Garden but idk with all that oil. But I’ll be like I didnt plan on it and she’ll be like tsk tsk wasting money. Like my bad I couldn't finish the $10 cheese fries.... But like she orders an appetizer and a burger with fries. and I used to when I was younger but I can't eat all that now. But it’s like watching almost every adult in my life overeat and binge it just idk it used to be comforting it made me feel like what I was doing was okay. I mean I'd see my grandma cry when she had cancer a year ago and she’d be like wanna order us some Hueys like with door dash and it's like idk during the quarantine especially I started to take on those habits. Also its like so easy to get fast food now like all you need is $20 and you can get almost any food you want. But anyways when she had cancer we spent easily over $400 in door dash and Uber Eats. I don’t blame her or anything I mean if I couldn’t go to work because I had cancer I’d be pretty depressed a lot too. But I took those habits in. When I’m bored or sad or even happy I order food. Like today I got paid and the first thing I did was open door dash and order Tekila. Not the drink its a restaurant. Which is coincidentally the same place I got all the fries from in my first post. And I ordered the same exact thing. I didnt eat all the fries this time. I was able to stop myself which I think is progress. But I was stuffed I was so full but I grabbed the cheese dip and got chips and fries and started to eat some. I stopped before I finished because I was like Danielle you’re full. Stop yk. So idk also yesterday night I didnt post but I weighed 175 and tonight I’m back to 179... Well tomorrow I have a football game and I am definitely getting nachos but I’ll try not to get fries tmrw. Small steps forward. Also I find myself contemplating starving myself a lot. Idk like this girl on my snap she's super skinny and I was like girl drop the workout routine and she was like I don’t workout lol I just don’t eat and I thought she was joking but she wasn’t. It’s sad how normal eating disorders are in teenage girls lives. Not saying that guys don’t experience that too but I am a teenage girl so I understand that perspective more. Honestly I just wanna be small and skinny and love my body. Right now I definitely do not love my body. Something that scares me is how close I am to 200 lbs. And I think that my friend would like internally hate me. The friend I mentioned in the first post the skinny one. She has an internal hatred for fat people. Or she has an internal fear of being fat herself which wouldn’t affect me but ik people that like are disgusted by fat people. I wonder if she thinks that of me when she sees my stomach or thighs. Idk I overthink a lot. I’m kinda tired tho idk. But it’s nice to rant to like no one because nobody sees these but if someone does see it you're not alone :).

#anorexic #bulimic #binging #proana #tw ed related #ed #tw ed rant

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readbythestarlight · 4 years

Text

c2e108

What is this ad

I can’t decide if they’re right or wrong about the Traveler at this point tbh, like are they being overprotective of Jester? Not trusting her to know what’s right for herself? Or is she actually blinded by her devotion

Double commune?

Wouldn’t it be interesting if Jester kinda got drawn into the Moonweaver

[[MORE]]

The Traveler has become like Jester’s stupid older brother who occasionally comes home from college and just encourages her to go wild

I really really really hope things end up okay

lol Beau accidentally getting stuck behind the bar

And Caleb is?? Very happy

Yeah they really don’t have anything specific to do next

I’m curious about what Caleb wants

Oh... Veth

C: "I would like to go home"

What

Our?

Back to the Empire okay I was confused

What’s he getting at I’m confused

Just go home to... fix things is a vague thing

Also yeah Caleb you’re being kinda a downer and also this isn’t really a plan

And frankly it just kinda sounds like a slightly selfish excuse to keep Veth with you

Also he’s acting like they were all gonna split like??

Idk I’m getting a weird slightly jarring vibe, like this doesn’t fit with what was happening rn

Like it feels jarring right

Like a weird interruption that doesn’t actually address anything

Beau doing some deep confessing tho about her motivations with the barter with the hag

Veth is really getting ready to leave and I’m gonna be sad.

Honestly this whole conversation has me wondering, where DO we go from here? Most of the original character arcs have been addressed. There’s a few main plot things left, but overall it’s like... what’s next?

I mean I know Matt will have plot important things I just can’t imagine what they are

Omg Beau and Fjord sailing the seven seas? HELL YEAH

F: "I don’t know if I give off this sense of knowing shit but I do NOT"

Oh frick oh boy addressing Fjord’s possible feelings?

"I feel like I’m the fourth version of myself since I left Port Damali" ohhhh that’s some interesting deep stuff

I like this conversation this is good

Ohhh there’s some definite feelings there and I love it but I also love that he’s not like rushing it, not in a hurry to know how she feels in turn. I love the softness of "as long as she’s here and as long as she’s happy"

YAAAAS FJORD ASK ABOUT YASHA

YES GOOD thank you beau for giving voice to what has been holding you back with Yasha

"I think we’re all super co-dependent on each other"

Oh babe Yasha SO likes you

B: "I think it’s easy to list after Jester because she’s sparkles and confetti and shiny. There’s something about Yasha that, I think, from the moment I saw her... that I think I’ve been avoiding"

F: "Something with more sustenance? Not as fleeting?"

B: "Yeah... yeah."

She just SMASHED all the anti’s arguments we stan Marisha Ray in this House

And Ashely’s smirky smile when Beau asked of Fjord thought Yasha liked her? Hecking good

I felt god in this chili’s tonight

....oh no Cad not again

Also I said Matt would bring plot stuff and here it is

This is what comes soon if not next

Yeeeees go Yasha!

This is chaos which is perfectly accurate

lmao Veth

NICE enterance Jester

M: "there is SO much going on right now"

Me: "let chaos reign"

Oh my GOD Veth

You broke Matt

Celia is the worst and I really will be upset if for some reason the Traveler did give her any special treatment

Fjord is so supportive I love him

SHE WAS

GONNA

JUMP???

Was she just making a running start??

I’m so confused???

“I’m the final dick!”

I can’t breathe

Matt and Travis are just losing it and so am I

Poor Celia

Okay

Uh... real moon?

Moonweaver is... displeased?

MOONWEAVER IS PIIIIISSSED

I should have known this was gonna go bad lol

Fled from his binds, huh?

Uh-oh...

Oh no

What happens to Jester if her “god” is gone???

Jesterrrrrr

Let him go baby girl

Omg Fjorddddddd

“You need to let GO, we will catch you!”

My hearrrrrt

TMW: “Why do you cry for this selfish creature?”

J: “Because I love him.”

The Moonweaver, the goddess of trickery in the name of love

No???

Jester DONT

Ugh I hope this is a “how much do you really love him” test

Oh, he did a selfless thing

Now I’m emotional

OH???

GROUP HUGGGGG

lol the dwarf and the gnoll awwwww

Good talk good talk

“I’m time?! She just saved you from a fucking god, teach her now!” lol Veth

lol these antics

They’re so supportive of her nonsense

Awww it’s cute that he’s trying to make friends with them

I... love Artagan not gonna lie

lmao he did theater

Wouldn’t it be cool if the ship had a transportation circle on it

Cad continuing to be the conscience of the group

I was a little worried before, but I’m looking forward to where they go next

Beau you kinda need to lay off the anti Traveler stuff okay just chill

But anyway, excited for what comes next

Awww the gnoll is gonna stay that’s cute

Eden’a Horizon is a nice name tbh I kinda hope they leave it

Awww

The Nein Heroes

Never mind that’s great I love it

The Fuckin’ Beau Bar

The Fuckin’ Beaurebar akdkskskdksk

Yussahhhh!

I’ve missed him too

Beau checking in with Yasha ;)

She wants to stayyyyyy <3

WOOOO level 13!

#critical role #cr spoilers #critical role spoilers

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seaofashes · 3 years

Note

*crashes through the ceiling* HOLA NYX! I’M HERE TO TELL YOU THAT THE RECENT ANON IS A LIAR AND NOTHING THEY SAID WAS TRUE

Warning that I say ‘and’ a lot. Also there’s a little bit of rambling cause my brain is fried

Nyx, you are a fantastic artist who only improves with each new piece! Please keep going and never let some coward who won’t go off of anon put out your fire. (Btw I saw the WIP for Tech and I can’t wait to see it when it’s done!!)

You are a smart, funny, talented, and an all around awesome person and I love talking to you!

Please take care and remember to stay hydrated okay? And remember that there’s so many people who care about you, love your art and love talking to you

I will fight that anon

You better be nice anon or I’ll kick you in the shins :)))) mostly cause that’s all I can reach

Anyways, love ya Nyx and I hope you have a good night! 💖

N E S S 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙 LOOK I AM OUT HERE CRYING IN THIS CHILIS TONIGHT. FULL ON UGLY CRYING, PLEASE WHAT DID I DO TO DESERVE SUCH SWEET PEOPLE IN MY LIFE??? This means so damn much to me you have no idea, I'm always nervous about art and about whether or not I'm annoying people so sometimes it's just ..nice to know that I'm NOT actually bothering you guys and it's just my brain being dumb. (I cannot WAIT until this Tech piece is done, I'm so excited)

Hfgcg kick em in the shins ness bb I'll hold your flowers 🌹

Ilysm and I'm forever grateful to know you and call you a friend, thank you for always being here for me and just being so sweet and supportive. And yes I will go get hydrated right now, get that earth juice (make sure you do as well 👀 it's important stuff)

Love ya Ness and I hope you have a wonderful night

#asks #nyx answers #consider it answered #ness 🌼

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lesbiansforboromir · 4 years

Note

Its been too long since I read the books and last time I saw the movies I was on denethor is a dick to my baby, let the man die. However, now I'm curious, since I remembered for instance that in the books he was devastated when he thought faramir died and your last reblog about that made me rethink my whole stance. Could you give me more positive denethor moments, or do I have to read the books again?

God I- I need so much for you all to understand how much I love asks like this, for PURELY selfish reasons, I just LOVE the idea of people like... doing what I do! Which is think about lotr and it’s characters and consider them in new angles and have fun with that! I feel connection and love in this chili’s tonight- ANYWAY.

To be clear, Denethor is one of my favourite characters, like JUST below Boromir in how much I love him and how furious I am with his portrayal in the films. I have a tag for him here that has a lot of good posts all about it. But positive moments for Denethor, yes ok! Lets start with my favourite quote from Denethor because it completely encompasses his- literally his ENTIRE book character;

In what is left, let all who fight the Enemy in their fashion be at one, and keep hope while they may, and after hope still the hardihood to die free.

Do you feel all the love and pride in his people and all the folk of middle earth who’re resisting this seemingly impossible threat? Even unto their inevitable end? Do you see the inherent belief that this is an unwinnable war, and yet how Denethor has remained Gondor’s greatest and most stalwart defender for all these years? GOD I do- ‘dying free’ is a VERY important sentiment that also puts a lot of his later, seemingly ‘mad’, actions into a much more understandable light. BUT I WILL TRY to not make this too much of a dissertation, god willing. SO! Onto Pippin’s swearing!

'Little service, no doubt, will so great a lord of Men think to find in a hobbit, a halfling from the northern Shire; yet such as it is, I will offer it, in payment of my debt.' Twitching aside his grey cloak, Pippin drew forth his small sword and laid it at Denethor's feet.

A pale smile, like a gleam of cold sun on a winter's evening, passed over the old man's face; but he bent his head and held out his hand, laying the shards of the horn aside. 'Give me the weapon!' he said. Pippin lifted it and presented the hilt to him. 'Whence came this?' said Denethor. 'Many, many years lie on it. Surely this is a blade wrought by our own kindred in the North in the deep past?'

'It came out of the mounds that lie on the borders of my country,' said Pippin. 'But only evil wights dwell there now, and I will not willingly tell more of them.'

'I see that strange tales are woven about you,' said Denethor, 'and once again it is shown that looks may belie the man – or the halfling. I accept your service. For you are not daunted by words; and you have courteous speech, strange though the sound of it may be to us in the South. And we shall have need of all folk of courtesy, be they great or small, in the days to come.’

The film really had no idea what to do with Pippin offering his service to Denethor as- well essentially an acknowledgement and an honouring of Boromir’s sacrifice for him. Because the Denethor in the film would have scorned it, but it’s an important plot point, so it’s just kinda in there awkwardly and uncomfortably. This is because Denethor genuinely appreciates Pippin’s gesture, his son died for this hobbit! But Pippin is fervent and honest and Denethor can tell! Denethor is grateful, he empathises! These are not traits film!denethor possessed, so we get the.... tomato... scene.... BUT ONWARDS, I consider this a positive scene, simply because Denethor and Gandalf’s rivalry in the books is just so much FUNNIER and interesting than in the films;

'And you, my Lord Mithrandir, shall come too, as and when you will. None shall hinder your coming to me at any time, save only in my brief hours of sleep. Let your wrath at an old man's folly run off and then return to my comfort!'

'Folly?' said Gandalf. 'Nay, my lord, when you are a dotard you will die. You can use even your grief as a cloak. Do you think that I do not understand your purpose in questioning for an hour one who knows the least, while I sit by?'

'If you understand it, then be content,' returned Denethor. 'Pride would be folly that disdained help and counsel at need; but you deal out such gifts according to your own designs. Yet the Lord of Gondor is not to be made the tool of other men's purposes, however worthy. And to him there is no purpose higher in the world as it now stands than the good of Gondor; and the rule of Gondor, my lord, is mine and no other man's, unless the king should come again.'

LIKE. IT’S FUNNY! Essentially Denethor’s like ‘oh ho I’m just an auld man dont be angry with me Gandy’ and Gandalf’s like ‘Denethor when you are ENFEEBLED by age you will DIE out of spite alone’ and Denethor’s like ‘OH FINE if you want to be that way, but you’re bloody annoying to deal with and I don’t TRUST you wholly so DEAL with it,’ And again we get Denethor’s like whole deal! Gondor is what he is here to defend! It’s his entire purpose in life! He doesn’t trust that Gandalf’s not going to use him for his own ends to the detriment of Gondor itself, which Gandalf LITERALLY admits he’d do in the next paragraph. Because he says ‘he’s the steward of everything, not just gondor’ which on the one hand is like, yeah, we get that, but you can understand Denethor’s perspective too. WHICH IS. GOOD CHARACTERISATION FOLKS!

'[Osgiliath] was 'It was a city,' said Beregond, 'the chief city of Gondor, of which this was only a fortress. For that is the ruin of Osgiliath on either side of Anduin, which our enemies took and burned long ago. Yet we won it back in the days of the youth of Denethor: not to dwell in, but to hold as an outpost, and to rebuild the bridge for the passage of our arms.a city,' said Beregond, 'the chief city of Gondor, of which this was only a fortress. For that is the ruin of Osgiliath on either side of Anduin, which our enemies took and burned long ago. Yet we won it back in the days of the youth of Denethor: not to dwell in, but to hold as an outpost, and to rebuild the bridge for the passage of our arms.’

This is just like a little thing but I think it’s just kinda important to emphasise that Denethor wasn’t just a politician, he bled heavily for Gondor’s safety too and the retaking of Osgiliath was an incredibly important victory that Denethor achieved for Gondor’s safety as a whole. Anyway SPEAKING of the tomato scene- god this really does entirely emphasise the difference between Film!Denethor and Book!Denethor;

‘Can you sing?'

Yes,' said Pippin. 'Well, yes, well enough for my own people. But we have no songs fit for great halls and evil times, lord. We seldom sing of anything more terrible than wind or rain. And most of my songs are about things that make us laugh; or about food and drink, of course.'

'And why should such songs be unfit for my halls, or for such hours as these? We who have lived long under the Shadow may surely listen to echoes from a land untroubled by it? Then we may feel that our vigil was not fruitless, though it may have been thankless.'

In the end Pipping doesn’t sing for him but like?? Look SEE LIKE. It’s not MEAN, Denethor is in general sardonic and kinda harsh and frustrating in tone but he’s not dismissive or uncharitable or heartless; he’s interested, he likes TALKING to Pippin, he likes to hear about the world! Songs about food and drink and weather are fine! Of course they have merit!

'Not – the Dark Lord?' cried Pippin, forgetting his place in his terror. Denethor laughed bitterly. 'Nay, not yet, Master Peregrin! He will not come save only to triumph over me when all is won. He uses others as his weapons. So do all great lords, if they are wise, Master Halfling. Or why should I sit here in my tower and think, and watch, and wait, spending even my sons? For I can still wield a brand.'

Do you hEAR the bitterness in these lines? How he has to SIT here and WAIT as he sends his loved ones to die- but he has too, he HAS to do this, it’s not new, he’s been sending his sons to their probably deaths for years, and god he wishes he could be a reckless man and just ride out himself again but there IS no one to step into his place if he should be lost and Gondor just can’t take that! IT’S cOMPELLING. And so... now we’ll end on the part you mentioned, which really is like... AGONISING, it’s heartbreaking, especially after Denethor’s manners and character up until this point, sharp, sardonic, dauntless, uncowed by ever new loss, every new defeat, Boromir’s death even did not crack him completely but now-

And as [Pippin] watched, it seemed to him that Denethor grew old before his eyes, as if something had snapped in his proud will, and his stern mind was overthrown. Grief maybe had wrought it, and remorse. He saw tears on that once tearless face, more unbearable than wrath.

'Do not weep, lord,' he stammered. 'Perhaps he will get well. Have you asked Gandalf?'

'Comfort me not with wizards!' said Denethor. 'The fool's hope has failed. The Enemy has found it, and now his power waxes; he sees our very thoughts, and all we do is ruinous.

'I sent my son forth, unthanked, unblessed, out into needless peril, and here he lies with poison in his veins. Nay, nay, whatever may now betide in war, my line too is ending, even the House of the Stewards has failed. Mean folk shall rule the last remnant of the Kings of Men, lurking in the hills until all are hounded out.'

Men came to the door crying for the Lord of the City. 'Nay, I will not come down,' he said. 'I must stay beside my son. He might still speak before the end. But that is near. Follow whom you will, even the Grey Fool, though his hope has failed. Here I stay.'

I’ll NEVER forgive the appropriation of the ‘my line is ending’ line, he doesn’t MEAN that he’s grieving the loss of his lineage, he’s grieving the loss of his WHOLE COUNTRY, of his people! As well as his son! And in this final moment with him his priorities of heart surface, where his people are banging desperately at his door, begging for their Lord to come to their aide, he refuses, because Faramir is far more important to him in this moment.

I said I wasn’t going to make this a dissertation but WHATEVER, there you are anon, hope it’s what you wanted than thANK YOU AGAIN for the ask :)

#denethor #tolkien #erran vs tolkien #chats #Anonymous

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always-and-forever-a-killjoy · 4 years

Text

Hello good morning and welcome to chili's- is that even the right reference? Whatever. Anyways, welcome to 'auri can't stop fucking writing about party poison and cherri cola' hours. They have such a fascinating bond ANYWAYS also welcome to a fucking trainwreck that i wrote all this morning.

Title: everybody wants to change the world

Wordcount: 2047

Summary:

Party Poison goes out, gets hurt, and chooses a different place for help than they usually would.

This has literally no plot beyond me making Poison have a bad time.

Warnings: injury, blood, death mentions.

Taglist: @wishiwasthemoon-tonight @sleevesareforlosers @stressed-depressed-emo-mess @tasteofamnesia @dagger-queen @no-braincells-here @piratecherricola (message me, send an ask, or reblog/reply to one of my posts if you want to be added or removed)

AO3 Link

(Actual fic under the cut)

Party Poison swore under their breath as they staggered back to the Trans Am, pressing a hand to their side. They were going to fucking bleed out here, outside a Mad Gear concert in Zone 4, all because they were a fucking dumbass and got themself stabbed. Because Poison could never live quietly, they didn't know how. All they knew was picking fights with random 'joys and listening to the music that blared from the speakers, way too loud and easily drowning out their thoughts. Now that was catching up to them, they guessed, as they slid into the car and put their bloody hand on the wheel.

"Home we go, baby."

No. Not home. Kobra had said, Kobra had told them 'don't go out and get hurt again, don't go picking fights, dumbass'. And Poison had gone and done it anyways. Gone and been a fucking idiot, as Kobes would say. So no, they were not going back to the diner yet. Not bleeding this heavily, anyways. The Girl didn't deserve to see this, nor did she deserve to watch them and Kobra fight about it.

That left Poison with the question of where, exactly, they were going to go. There weren't a lot of people in the world they trusted to see them like this, injured and exhausted and close to crying because it all hurt, it always had. In fact, most of those people, four of them, lived in the old diner where they couldn't -wouldn't- go. Most of those people...but not all of them.

Poison turned the Trans Am to a different path, speeding towards a little radio shack in the middle of the desert. If nothing else, they knew Dr. D would be happy to fix them up and send them on their way again, and then they could head back to diner late at night when no one was awake and no one would need to know they had gotten stabbed like a dumbass.

Unluckily for them, it was one in the fucking morning, and Dr. D was soundly asleep when they stumbled into the station. They assumed, at least, given that he was nowhere to be seen and the radio station was quiet. Empty, in fact. Or at least the living room was. Poison stumbled towards the broadcasting room, hearing a low voice from that direction.

Cherri Cola looked up they stumbled in the door, pausing in the middle of reading off a poem. "Poison?"

"Pepsi! I got stabbed." Poison tried to grin at him, the smile turning into a grimace at the pain in their side.

Cherri stared at them for a few moments, then turned back to the broadcast. "Well, WKIL listeners, I'm afraid this where I leave you for tonight, given that we've got a bit of a situation going on, but I should be back for later this night- well, this morning, technically, I'd say we're coming up on one am now. Cherri Cola, signing off." He turned back to Poison with a sigh. "Where did you get stabbed?"

They tried not to be offended at his huff. "Here. Where my hand is."

Cherri stood, gesturing to them to follow him back to the living room area, where he grabbed a first aid kit. "Lay down on the sofa, that much blood means I probably need to stitch you up."

"Great."

"I'm going to peel back your shirt, okay? Only as far as I need to clean and stitch it," Cherri promised.

Poison shrugged, pulling their jacket off before they laid down. "Do what y'have to."

His hands were scarred and calloused, the skin rough, but he was gentle when he pulled the bloody fabric away and started cleaning out the wound. They gasped in pain anyways, gritting their teeth as their side sent flickers of agony running through them.

"Sorry, sorry," Cherri said quietly. "I promise only a bit more to go, I just need to stitch this."

Poison nearly screamed when he started the first stitch, letting out a strangled yelp instead. "How much longer?"

"Three more stitches, then I'm done."

They gritted their teeth again, clenching their fists by their sides as he tied off the next stitch, and the next, and the next.

"Okay, done." Cherri set the needle aside, closing the first aid kit. "You okay?"

Poison would have laughed if they weren't in so much pain. "Of course 'm not fucking okay. Why would I be fucking okay?"

They hated the pity on his face as he gently scooted them over to sit down next to them. "Silly question, I'm sorry. What's wrong?"

Poison could have been dignified, but they chose to lean against him instead as the feelings they had been bottling up came pouring out. "Everything. Everything is wrong because Kobes is always angry and Jet's always sad and Ghoul's scared and Motorbaby shouldn't have to grow up here, shouldn't have to see us fall apart. What's the point? What's the point, Cola? What are we fighting for? Is there even a future ahead of us? What's even the point of life?"

"Honestly?"

"Honestly."

"There isn't a point." Poison gaped at him. "There isn't a point to life, not unless you make one. You have to decide what you want, what's worth fighting for."

The words fell softly into the quiet of the radio station, shattered by Poison's harsh voice. "And how the fuck am I supposed t' do that?"

"It's hard to describe, but..." Cherri trailed off. "Find what means something to you. What you love. For me that's poetry, and Newsie, and D and Pone and you and your crew, and the stars. Also, Mad Gear, they're vastly superior to Benny and the Trampolines."

Poison managed a small laugh. "True that. But what is the point, to you?"

“Well, in the simplest form...the point of life is happiness.”

“I thought the point of my life was to change the world,” they muttered bitterly. Maybe it made them an asshole, maybe the other was trying to help, but it was their fucking job to change things and they were tired of it.

Cherri’s voice was heartbreakingly gentle. “It doesn’t matter how big of a difference you made to the world. All that matters is that you made a different to you.”

Poison found that their eyes were stinging, tears collecting in them. “Are you sure?” Their voice sounded small and pathetic, and they hated it.

“I’m sure. You deserve happiness, more than anything else. It should never be your job to save the world, not so young. Never.”

They tried to speak again, but all that came out was a shuddering, gasping sob. Some small part of them was embarrassed, mortified to be crying in front of Cherri Cola, of all people, but the bigger part of their mind couldn’t bring themself to care. Not when their heart ached more than the wound in their side, not when Cherri was holding his arms out silently, clearly an offer.

Maybe it made them weak, but Poison took the comfort, letting themself be encased safely in the older killjoy’s arms. “I don’t want to die, Cola.” They hated how their voice shook. “I don’t want to die.”

“I know. I know.”

“I want to save everyone, I want to make a difference.” They let out another sob. “But I don’t want to die.”

“Your life should never be the price,” Cherri murmured.

“But it is. But it is! I have to- I’m going to die ch- changing the world. I’m supposed to- to save everyone, even if I have to d-die to do it.”

Poison thought they heard his usually unshakable voice waver a little. “No, Poison, no. This never should have been your job."

"Well who- who was g- going to do it?"

They couldn't see his face, but his voice was very quiet. "It was supposed to be D and I, years and years ago. Me, and D, and Lily. It shouldn't have even been Newsie and Chimp, shouldn't have been Pony, definitely shouldn't have been you. I'm sorry, Poison."

"'s okay." They found themself curling up further, head leaning on his shoulder. "Who's Lily?"

"White Lily, leader of the first rebellion, said to be one of the first of the killjoys," Cherri murmured. "Giver of plastic flower hairclips, the only person who was allowed to call Newsie 'News', and one of my three siblings. In a way."

"Oh." Another sob made its way out of their throat, but this mysterious 'Lily' was a good distraction. "Tell me about her?"

"Well, the day I met her, she was twenty-one and she asked me 'Did this softy offer you a place to stay?'..." Cherri launched into a quiet story about two kind killjoys who offered a desperate sixteen-year-old the first real home he had ever known. His voice was low, soothing, and Poison let themself relax a little bit as they listened to the story.

"D' you have any more stories about 'your day'?"

"I think I have some poems about it, actually," Cherri replied dryly. "Stories, yes, but also poems, which are easier."

"Not easier to understand," Poison muttered, but they let him half carry them back into the broadcast room and proceeded to drape themself over his lap when he started up again.

"Hello there, my late-night crash queen friends, it's me, Cherri Cola, back again. At the request of my companion, the next few poems of the corner will be about the olden days, back before you rock and rollers were out on the road." He started on a poem which Poison thought must have been about Dr. D, plenty of metaphors about the voice of the desert. After that one and one more was finished, he switched on some music and turned back to them.

"When is your crew expecting you home?"

"Don't know. Concert was over at midnight, but they know I sometimes stay out later. For all I know, they all went to bed."

"I'm going to radio the diner, if that's okay?"

"Don't want them t' know I got hurt." Their words were mashed up more from sleepiness than blood loss by now.

"I'll say you got lost." Cherri's tone was joking, but his voice grew serious again as he went on. "Or I'll just say you're staying here tonight, you don't owe them an explanation of why. You do owe it to them to make sure they aren't worried for you, though."

"Okay." They felt rather schooled, staring down at the perpetually dirty floor of the radio station as Cherri fiddled with the radio.

Eventually, Fun Ghoul picked up, sounding sleepy. "Hello?"

"Hey, Ghoul."

"What is it, Cola? You got word of Party?"

"They decided to drop by after the concert, so we're hanging out tonight. They'll be okay, just too tired to drive the Am safely. I'll send them back tomorrow morning by the time you need the Trans Am for anything, but please tell the others not to worry."

"Gotcha. Motorbaby got sleepy, took Jet and Kobra to get her to sleep 'cause Pois is out, then they conked out. I told them to. But if they wake up, I'll tell them, and I won't worry toooo much. Tell Pois I said hi!"

Poison was incredibly thankful Ghoul had picked up instead of one of the other two, since xe wasn't the sort to ask many questions. Kobra would have been suspicious, and Jet would have been pretty decent about it but concerned. And Poison didn't need those two's concern right now.

"Right, well, sleep well, Ghoul. Pois says hi," Cherri said. That was technically a lie, since Poison hadn't said anything, but they didn't really mind. Ghoul deserved some reassurance, even if it was false.

Cherri clicked the radio off. "Right, my stabbed friend. I've got some more broadcasting to do, but you're welcome to stay."

"You're an insufferable bastard," Poison yawned.

"Yes, I am. Sleep well, Sleepy Poison."

Poison had absolutely not intended in any way, shape, or form to fall asleep on Cherri's lap, but they found themself yawning again as he started on another poem. And before they or he had a chance to say goodnight, they were out like a light.

#cherri cola #party poison #auri writes

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