#anyway! hate this woman and dunno what the fuck to tell her to advertise for me because a) hell do I say about me and b) she’ll do whatever

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #317

i’m tired as a motherfucker and don’t feel like thinking up some lyrics, so here, jus have the survey.

Have you volunteered in the past 6 months? No. French fries or onion rings? French fries. I don't like onion rings. Do you suffer from anxiety? Very badly. Favorite healthy snack? "Apples and peanut butter are one of them." <<<< Same, actually. Good shit. Favorite Disney movie? Forever and always The Lion King. If you see a bee in your house.. are you going to kill it? I hate to say it, but I'm killing it. Do you normally take a shower in the morning or at night? Morning. Do you have a cat? Yeah. What is your favorite animal? It will always be meerkats. Always. Do you know what time you were born? 10:30 AM, I believe. Do you like McDonalds? I'm gonna be real: I've never understood the McDonald's hate. I enjoy it perfectly fine. I mean it's certainly not gourmet, but I'll choose it over other fast food places sometimes. It's cheap and decent food, imo. What's your favorite flower? Orchids. Have you thought about joining the military? FUCK no. Who is the person that has impacted your life the most? Given my PTSD, I think it's pretty obviously Jason. Have you ever had a pet fish? Yeah, but not a lot. I never enjoyed them much. Have you ever wanted to be on a game show? Not seriously, no. I wouldn't want to be on television. Have you ever vaped? Nah. Who was the last person to give you a hug? Either my niece or nephew. Have you ever been on TV? I don't think so, no. What's your favorite store in the mall? Hot Topic, ugggghhhhh take me there. Has anyone ever told you that you have an accent? Yeah, especially when I was younger when I definitely did have a clear Southern accent. Do you have any piercings? Yeah, six. I have been DYING for a new one lately... How did your parents meet? Work. What was your first word? "Dada." Do you eat more healthy food or junk food? Somewhere in the middle, I'd say. What do you spend too much money on? When it's my own money, tattoos. I think I'll be perfectly capable of doing it, but when I'm employed, I'm going to have to watch how much I invest into those. What is a disturbing episode of an otherwise non-disturbing show? What is a disturbing show (or one you would describe as one) is enjoyable to you? Meeeh I don't watch enough for this. What is the most memorable song in a movie? How about a show? Oh wow, I dunno. "Circle of Life" from TLK is a beauty, as is "Strangers Like Me" from Tarzan. There really are a lot. As for shows, "Carry On My Wayward Son" from Supernatural will immediately get fans screaming the lyrics, haha. However, I don't know if that song properly counts since it wasn't written just for the show, but whatever. What is something you’re grateful for that humans have made/have continued to make exist? What about something that you wish that humans didn’t destroy? The Internet, whew. I wish humans would stop destroying the fucking environment. It's heartbreaking how many woods are wiped away here for construction, only to never be built on... While evil men are commonly talked about, what woman would you consider the most evil? I don't know, but it would probably be a rapist or pedophile. Those are probably the people I abhor most. Do you believe children can be evil? If so, what child from history do you believe to have been the most evil? I don't really think children are born evil, no. I've never heard of a diabolical baby or anything. I think the environment they are raised in molds them as they age. I don't know about the last question. Name one way that music can be bad for humans. It can be depressing sometimes, actually dragging your mood down, especially if you already feel low. What has been one of the most blatant advertising in a movie, show, or music video? Some of these questions are hard man, idfk lol. What book have you read/listened to that “messed you up” (or made you have a lot of negative feelings afterward)? Johnny Got His Gun left me feeling so spiteful towards and disappointed in the world. It definitely made me feel down for a while. If you have a pet, what is the best thing that you have for them (either a toy, a highly rated food, etc)? If you don’t have one but would like one, have you thought about what you would get your pet? We definitely don't have the money for "high quality" stuff. What works, works. Did you ever know anyone who was (previously) a part of a cult? What cult? Were you ever a part of one? No. What is something that is legal right now that really shouldn’t be? I'm stealing the previous person's answer by saying fireworks. They have a horrible effect on animals and PTSD victims and is just litter and a fire hazard. What is a movie you consider successful/good that did not have high reviews? I'm not educated enough on movie rankings. When you met the person you now like, what happened? We hugged and cried a bit lmao. Did you realize anything today? No. What do you want to do today? It'd be nice to get off my ass and get Emerson's birthday pictures into Lightroom so Ashley can finally have them... Can you honestly say you’d risk your life for someone else? I know with certainty I would for some people. Could you forgive a boyfriend or friend who physically hurt you? Ha, nope, byyyyeee~ What’s the cutest thing someone’s ever done for you? Ugh... So one night when I was lying down to go to bed but also texting Jason, I was being playful and joked for him to sing me to sleep. He sent me a video for "The Mortician's Daughter" by Black Veil Brides (one of his favorite bands) and just pasted the lyrics, and I thought it was the cutest fucking thing ever. I went to bed listening to it and just smiling. It's why I just don't listen to it anymore. I shouldn't have even talked about it, soooo next question. What are the top five places you wish you could go before you die? Ummm South Africa, Yellowstone National Park, Germany, Alaska, and the Bahamas, maybe. How many tattoos would you like to have? I'm gonna be a fuckin mural. I want tats pretty much everywhere. What question do you hate to answer? "What do you like to do for fun?" What's your favourite animated or cartoon program? Fullmetal Alchemist. What do you think the greatest invention has been? Electricity. What's your favourite movie quote? I dunno, I don't really have one. Do you prefer digital or analogue clocks? Analogue clocks are way more elegant and can be beautifully decorated. Who is your favorite foreign singer/musician? Do you translate his or her lyrics? If you exclude English-speaking foreign bands, like from the UK, Rammstein for sure. I can translate some of them. Say something in a foreign language? "Liebe" means "love" in German. What is a weather-type that you like that not many others do? Snow, for sure. I've never understood the "ew, snow" type of people. It's so pretty. Granted, it's rare here, so it's more of a treat down here, but still. Who do you know personally that has a nice singing voice? Sara has a beautiful voice. What was the last word you learned? I have no clue, given how bad my memory is becoming... It's hard for me to learn anything nowadays, because it doesn't stick. What is your favorite culture? (that you find most interesting): I'll be honest, I'm not very well-informed on foreign cultures. Due to taking so many classes though, I do find German culture to be quite appealing. They are very serious about honesty (for example, telling someone you're okay when you're not is frowned upon in small talk, even), as well as manners. I would love to experience their lifestyle. Have you ever watched anime porn? I've never watched porn to begin with. If you got paid $3 million to smoke meth one time would you do it? Nope. I'm not risking addiction or death. Are ladybugs cute? Yesssss. Will you leave the house without fragrance on? Yeah, I usually do. Do you make good money doing what you do? I'm unemployed. I've only ever worked minimum wage jobs. What is your favorite fruit? Strawberries, yum. And kiwi. What do you think of horses? I love them! Are you doing something with your life that matters? Ugh, I don't feel like it. Do you like gravy on your mashed potatoes? I hate gravy. What is the dirtiest rap song you have ever heard? Nicole played "WAP" once when I was in the car and I wanted to die. What about a dirty song in any other genre? "Bitches" by Hollywood Undead MIGHT be rap, but idk? What even is their genre???? But anyway, as much as I love the song, it's dirty as shit. What is a genre of music you simply can't stand? Rap, generally. What is, in your opinion, the best way of dealing with a break up? Lots and lots of self-care and focusing on loving yourself and realizing your worth lies in yourself and not another person. What flavor of Doritos do you like best? Cool Ranch, of course. Would you ever go to a comedy club? Yeah, sure. Why is it that photography is becoming a trend? Because it's art, and people enjoy art???????? What is the funniest movie you have ever seen? White Chicks gets me way harder than it should lmao. Would you ever consider dating someone who lived across the country? I guess, so long it was the plan that we'd eventually move in together, and effort was being made to achieve that once we got pretty serious. Do you have a tattoo? If you do, describe the pain you went through when getting it done. Well, I have six, so I'll just talk about my first one, which was on my wrist. It really isn't bad, especially once you've adjusted to the pain. I think the best metaphor would be that it's like lightly pinching a cat scratch. Outlining is the worst part, imo. What is your favorite bookstore? I don't have one. Who was the last person to tell you that you were cute? I have no idea. When was the last time you had a fever? How high did it go? Oh, I couldn't tell you. Those are very rare for me. How many times do you think that you’ve truly been in love before? With who? Twice, with Jason and Sara. Do you prefer French kissing, or regular kissing more, and why? I mean, this depends on the mood as well as how serious we are. Have you ever been married before? How many times? No. Who do you know that gives the best hugs? Summer has always been a big, strong hugger like I am. Have you ever dated someone of the same gender before? Yeah. Who do you consider to be your hero? My mom. Who is your best friend? Tell us about them. Sara. She's a very caring, strong, creative, just overall amazing person who stands firmly for what she feels is right, and we can't forget about her incredible loyalty, nor her absolute adoration for animals, reptiles especially. How much did your car cost? I don't have my own car. What is the last picture you received on your phone of? Sara sent me a photo of Martha, her ball python. Do you have any friends that actually model? No. Do you keep condoms in your room? No, considering I have no reason to. Do you follow any special diet? (dairy free, vegetarian, gluten free etc.) No, but I desperately want to return to being vegetarian. Vegan would be even better, but I know I'm absolutely not capable of that. What is an appliance you don’t have, but would love to have? uhhhhh Which keys on your keyboard are worn out the most? My "a," "s," and "d" from gaming. If you could be any supervillain, which would you be? Ha, I could probably pull off Harley Quinn pretty easily. Though "super"villain sounds a bit strong for her. What’s the most historic thing that has happened in your lifetime? Either Covid or 9/11, probably. What’s the scariest non-horror movie? I personally think the idea behind Johnny Got His Gun is fucking terrifying. What’s the most amazing true story you’ve heard? More beautiful than "amazing," but whatever. I can't think of anything else. Jason's mother actually left his father to go back home to New York when he cheated on her, but he followed her all the way there, and they wound up reconciling and were very happily married since. They were a spectacular couple, and I miss them a lot. What brand are you most loyal to? I have no idea. It's hard to be loyal to any when you're not the one buying products. Where are you not welcome anymore? Well, speaking of him, probably Jason's house, haha... I feel that if I just showed up there, his parents would honestly be super happy to see me and want to catch up, but Jason, not so much. I doubt Colleen would welcome me into her house, either. What’s the most recent show you’ve binge-watched? Avatar: The Last Airbender w/ Sara. What’s a common experience for many people that you’ve never experienced? Just... adult stuff. Paying bills. Having a stable job. Passing their driver's test. What are some misconceptions about your hobby? We'll use forum roleplay here, in which case I know a very common misconception is that it's sexual in nature and is a kink. It's never been that for me. It's about building unique, complex characters in a vast universe of your creativity, meshing with other's. It's a beautiful thing to me. What’s the dumbest thing someone has argued with you about? Oh, I'm sure something with Mom... because she is absolutely never wrong. What’s the longest rabbit hole you’ve been down? Conspiracy theories on YouTube, aha... What odd smell do you really enjoy? I really enjoy the smell of lilacs, though I know people who think they smell too strong and/or just stink. If you had a HUD that showed three stats about any person you looked at, what three stats would you want it to show? Hm, interesting question. Maybe approachability, moral alignment, and mood. What is your favorite flavor of pop tart? I really like the chocolate sundae ones. Gum? I really like fruit-flavored gums, especially watermelon or strawberry. Last song you sang along to? I sang a bit to "Second Chance" by Shinedown. Are you fascinated by rivers? Yeah, sure. Streams, more specifically, because you can see the bottom and walk more safely in them. I love exploring those. Do you live near a volcano? No, and I plan on keeping it that way, haha. How big is the screen on your digital camera? I dunno, the normal size for a Canon? Do you find train whistles comforting? No. What bird is the cutest? Oh, that's so hard. I love the pastel-colored ones, and hummingbirds are like, universally cute. Are you scared to look at your own organs on x-ray or ultrasound? No, that's actually really cool. Do big eyes freak you out? On people? Generally, no. I tend to find them cute, actually, especially on girls, but I've definitely seen people with big eyes that instead look kinda creepy. Have you ever walked on a frozen lake/river? Hm, I'm actually not sure. I don't believe so, though. Have you ever held a real sword? No. Have you ever seen a tree over 100 years old? Uh, realistically, probably? That's not that old in the grand scheme of trees, is it? Do you feel uncomfortable at fancy restaurants? I can sometimes, yes. I feel very out-of-place.

#survey #surveys #questions

[statusquoergo]

We all knew this was going to be a disaster, right? We didn’t know how, but I mean, we knew. We were ready.

We were not disappointed.

Harvey, on the phone with Donna, enters his apartment with an indignant exclamation that he can’t believe she’s not coming over tonight, after he went to all the trouble of getting pizza with “those stupid yellow tomatoes” she likes. She really can't, though, because she has plans with an old friend who called her at the last minute out of the blue; he asks her instead to come over later because, though it’s not something he advertises, he watches Survivor and was hoping to get her into it. (First Oprah, now Survivor; I could've sworn Harvey’s media tastes tended more towards the classics.) She takes a rain check, he asks who this “old friend” is, and wouldn’t you know it, here’s Mike Ross.

“Survivor? What are you, a thousand?”

(Given this show’s trans-dimensional timeline, that actually wouldn’t surprise me.)

Okay, real talk. Considering the amount of promotion this show and USA Network did to brag that Mike was coming back, it’s incredibly unlikely that anyone in the viewing public was surprised by the “big reveal” (which also explains why they got it out of the way in the first thirty seconds), but…they could’ve tried. At least a little.

Harvey rounds the corner into his kitchen area thing and finds Mike, leaning against the counter as he delivers his opening salvo, and this is where it starts getting weird. (Yes, already.) Mike is settled in like he belongs there, fine, but Harvey, even though he’s smiling, kind of, doesn’t seem remotely surprised to see him. He doesn’t even respond to Mike directly, instead telling Donna: “I get it. The plans weren’t for you, they were for me.” She tells him to have a great time, he hangs up, and right away we’re into some old-fashioned banter.

Minor detour for the first hint that Korsh is going out of his way to replace Marvey with Darvey: Harvey and Mike haven’t seen each other in over a year. Mike appears suddenly, without warning, in Harvey’s apartment, and opens with a joke, dropping them right back into their usual patterns without missing a beat. I’m not expecting Harvey to start screaming and jumping up and down, but you remember how big and bright his smile was when Mike got into the bar? This is like, a third of that, at best. One option that might’ve been better than “The plans weren’t for you, they were for me” might be, I dunno, “Sorry Donna, I have to go. An old friend just showed up out of the blue.” Instead he treats Mike like he’s been expecting him, tidying things up with Donna before he can be bothered to respond to what I assume is actually a huge surprise. I’m starting to think all the promotional buildup might've been a mistake, because this is even more underwhelming than I ever thought possible.

And that’s just on the emotive level; let’s talk about the dialogue.

“You know, just because she gave you a key doesn’t mean you’re staying here.”

Harvey, to Mike, “Tricks of the Trade” (s01e06): “Remind me to have Donna get you a spare key.” Mike’s had a key to Harvey’s place since forever, this isn’t news. (And let’s not forget the metaphorical connotations of Mike having a “key” to Harvey’s home, and the fact that their lives are no longer intrinsically intertwined, i.e., he’s here but he’s not staying. They’re definitely there. Even if it’s by accident.)

“Why would I stay here? I’ve got my old apartment that you’re pretending to rent for me. ‘Rick Sorkin’? You’ve gone soft.”

How does Mike know about that? Has he known for awhile and not brought it up for some reason, or did Donna tell him about it an hour ago? Second hint of Darvey replacing Marvey, tied right back to the first time they pulled this shit in “Everything’s Changed” (s09e01): Harvey used the name “Rick Sorkin,” the Harvard grad who Mike impersonated in the pilot, to maintain a connection to Mike, and he might’ve treated it like a touching callback joke when he told Donna about it, but it’s actually pretty sad. Don’t forget, he came up with the idea about a year before he and Donna got together, so for all that time it was just a little thing that he had all to himself to keep Mike close by in any way he could. Point being, if anyone was going to tell Mike about it, it should've been Harvey, but Donna, the new most important person in Harvey’s life, evidently needs to be wedged into every facet of his business, no matter who else was there first.

“I was using it as a tax shelter.”

Wait, I’m confused. Was Mike supposedly making money off this rental or not? Has Harvey been sending him “rent checks”? Do they have a joint account where Harvey’s been making deposits? Did Mike just give Harvey the apartment? Did Harvey take out a mortgage for some reason?

“And what’s the name of that tax shelter? ‘I’m a Softie’?” “Maybe I’ve always been a softie.”

What the fuck is happening right now?

“What happened to uh, ‘Caring makes you weak’?” “I think you’re confusing ‘caring’ with ‘moving to Seattle.’”

So…moving to Seattle makes Mike weak. And Mike just smiles and nods over this one (seriously, his expression is the nonverbal equivalent of saying, “You got me there”), so does that mean he agrees that moving to Seattle was weak? (It was definitely a weak plot point, but I don’t think they’re that self-aware.)

“Speaking of Seattle, don’t you have some old ladies looking to sue the condo association, or whatever big case you’ve got going on these days?”

He takes class actions against Fortune 500s, that would have to be one hell of a condo association.

“Yes I do, but those old ladies are gonna have to wait, because I always have time for an old friend. It’s good to see you, Harvey.” “Great to see you, Mike.” “Is that Gionno’s?” “It is. You like yellow tomatoes?”

I hate this hug. I hate it so much. I was suspicious when I saw it in the promos, but at least then I could hold out hope for a real hug before the end of the episode, something à la the attempted-handshake-cum-goodbye-hug in “Faith” (s05e10) or the other attempted-handshake-cum-goodbye-embrace in “Goodbye” (s07e16). But no. This is it. This is all we get. The most performative bro-hug (complete with patronizing back patting) I could possibly imagine between two dudes who literally tried to go to prison for each other. Mike doesn’t even take two seconds to savor the moment before he’s asking about dinner! He seems so disinterested and distracted, I had to watch this scene three times to be sure he wasn’t using the hug as an excuse to get a better view of the pizza box. (He isn’t, but only just.)

I don’t know if anyone gives a shit, but the big secondary plot of this episode is that Sheila has some totally legitimate but previously unaired anxieties about balancing her job with motherhood and because no one on this show knows how to use their words, she expresses these fears by yelling at Louis for not understanding this thing she’s never tried to explain to him. Oh also they’re sexually roleplaying Cinderella with some $9000 glass slippers, and Sheila spent a whole meeting at work calling some major donor by the wrong name (and he didn’t correct her…why?) so he pulled his $50,000 donation and she feels like a failure.

Back to the prodigal son for an abbreviated rundown of the Journey of Darvey: “Let me get this straight: I tell Donna to kiss you, she does, and then, as a result, you ask another woman to move in with you.” No he absolutely fucking did not tell her that; he said, and I quote, “Tell Harvey how you feel” (s07e10). Because that’s, you know. Not sexual harassment. (Also he was there for that, why did Harvey just recap it for him? I know why, because Korsh assumes the audience has been zoned out for awhile now, but still, that's so narratively inconsistent. Well, I suppose that's their brand, I can't blame them for leaning into it.)

Anyway Harvey says “it was a complicated situation,” and Mike shoehorns in another summary (“Must have been, because then Donna starts dating a client, breaks privilege for him, and then you two end up together”) that makes me think Korsh is expecting to bring back a lot of viewers for this episode who bailed on the first four; joke’s on him, this episode actually pulled the second-lowest number of viewers so far this season (0.96M). Harvey dismisses this unnecessary recap with the point that they discussed all of this on the phone “like a month ago,” and SINCE FUCKING WHEN? They can’t just casually drop in that Harvey and Mike have been talking on the phone when every other instance of them on the phone for the past two seasons has been Harvey leaving depressing messages on Mike’s voicemail. That is not fair, they’re ruining my melancholia.

Harvey reasonably points out that Mike didn’t come all the way to New York for no reason, Mike says he’s there on business, and Harvey makes an odd choice with his rejoinder: “The business of begging for your old job back? Because it’s too late. We’ve replaced you.” Now, I’ll freely admit to having read and written so much fanfiction that at first viewing, I thought I remembered Harvey telling Mike, at some point or another, that he’s irreplaceable (he did not), but this is still a weird (and somewhat bitter) direction for him to take the conversation. The fact that he mentions Mike coming back to the firm at all reads to me like a not-so-subtle admission that he misses him (which we already knew from all the times Harvey said he misses him, s08e01-04), but to immediately say not that the firm isn’t hiring, but specifically that Mike has been replaced, is just mean. Like, on a personal level, that is…not nice. Mike takes it as a joke (as I’m sure it was intended) and they have a little more banter, and it’s nice and nostalgic and all, but the content is pretty weak; particularly Mike’s line that if Harvey had Mike’s memory, he wouldn’t forget things like checking to see if Mike’s replacement has a law degree, makes feels like I’m being beaten over the head with reminders of what was fun about this show back in the day while simultaneously being cajoled into sticking with it until the end.

Mike divulges that “the asshole [he’s] going up against” is “Harvey Sphincter. He plays it real tight,” and I would pay good money for Harvey to retort, “You would know,” but no such luck. Mike represents Jeremy Wall, a professional basketball player who wants out of his contract with Brick Street Athletics, that client Harvey gave to Samantha as a gesture of goodwill back in “Everything’s Changed,” and now I understand why I had no hope of correctly guessing what would be the plot of this episode: This suit has nothing to do with Mike’s firm. There are currently only seven apparel companies on the Fortune 500 list and of those seven, only one, Nike, is a major sponsor of professional athletes, so the odds that this is a Fortune 500 case are insanely low; aside from that, this suit is so far from a class action that I don’t know how it even came across Mike’s desk to begin with. But it did, and he’s here, and Harvey correctly deduces that Mike’s main goal isn’t to convince Brick Street to let Jeremy out of his contract, but to challenge Harvey, and. We’ll get to that in a bit.

Before we move on, though, because I’m me, I have to mention that when Mike kicks off the suit with an accusation of breach of contract, Harvey proposes holding a deposition the next day, and that is not how that works. Even if Mike and Jeremy have been secretly preparing for the possibility of a deposition for months, Mike can’t just spring on his client that, surprise! You’re testifying to opposing counsel tomorrow afternoon! Plus Brick Street Athletics might be Harvey’s client—or, might have been, I guess, since now they’re Samantha’s, but anyway, regardless of how well he knows their business model, he isn’t ready to go into a deposition for a suit against them totally off the cuff; he needs time to prepare, and the fact that he is the one who suggests having the deposition tomorrow is absolutely insane.

Ready for a subplot roundup?

Louis asks Alex, who has two kids and thus “survived two pregnancies with Rosalie” (real nice), for help in not upsetting Sheila; Alex tells him to listen to her and do nothing, Louis thanks him, and we all, including Alex, know that Louis is definitely not going to do that.

Wanting to repay Katrina for protecting her vote with the code of conduct thing, Donna decides the best way to do this is to peer pressure her into calling Brian because she hasn’t picked a new associate (what happened to Susan?) and she hasn’t seemed herself lately (she’s been one of the most in-character characters so far this season). Katrina says she’s fine, which in Suits-land is basically the same as admitting that she isn’t, and Donna says she’s here if Katrina wants to talk.

Rather than do nothing, Louis goes to Benjamin, who is still pissed about the whole hack-into-the-NYSBA-and-then-get-fired thing, but Louis brought bacon (nice callback), he says he’s sorry, and also he’s willing to put up $50K of his own money to make Sheila feel better about herself, so Benjamin agrees to give him a hand in order to “run a proxy through a financial institution to create the appearance of an anonymous donation from a tax sheltered company,” which is the most romantic thing Benjamin has ever heard in his life.

Okay, cool.

Part II

#suits usa #s09e05 #season 9 #marvey #analysis

[bloodiedskirtts]

The Safest Way To Go | Part Ten: Advertise My Secret

Summary: After six months apart, and no contact, Y/N returns 

Pairing: Bucky x Reader

Word Count: 2.4k

Warnings: Fluff (who is she?), mentions of sex, SFW smut

A/N: TAG LIST IS OPEN!

Feedback is always appreciated! Thanks for reading. I hope you guys like it! Gif not mine, credit to owner.

Safest Way To Go Masterlist

Bucky Barnes hated the time he spent apart from Y/N. But he realised that she was right, they needed to learn how to be apart from one another. And it was hard. He couldn’t get used to living with Sam, he wanted more than anything to cuddle up with her and watch some Disney movie. He missed her cooking in the kitchen in the mornings and how she would sing under her breath. He missed the way her nose crinkled up when she was thinking and how she teased him.

He missed her sleeping beside her, feeling her curled up in his chest. And the soft sighs that escaped from her lips as she slept soundly. She missed sharing showers with her, going for coffee with her, cooking with her. And God he missed having sex with her. He missed her kisses, the taste of her tongue, the way she sighed into his mouth. He wanted to feel her under his body, feel her breasts in his hands and the feel of her pussy around his cock.

He missed everything about her! Even fighting with her! He never thought he would say, but he missed fighting with her. Although he had vowed to never fight with her again. 

He woke up the final day of the semester his heart thumping but it fell when Peggy told him that Y/N got an internship in Paris for the summer. So she wouldn’t be back until August. That was six whole months where they didn’t speak, didn’t see one another at all. He was panicking. What if she had moved on? What if she didn’t ever want to return to him? 

‘Calm down, Buck,’ Steve said, as he lay on his couch. ‘She loves you.’

Bucky was scrolling through her Instagram, his heart was aching. He missed her so terribly. And she seemed to be uncaring about the distance between them. Her Instagram was a curation of snaps of Paris, smiling selfies and outfit snaps. She seemed to have a perfect life without him.

‘But what if she doesn’t?’ he whispered softly.

And so the months passed, achingly slowly. They finished college, with Tony throwing another massive party. Bucky started interning for a photography company in Manhattan. Steve and Peggy went to visit her family in England for a month. Sam was focusing more on his modeling career over the summer. With the help of Bucky, he had built up a hefty portfolio and his Instagram following was increasing by the day.

Sharon and Nat moved into Steve and Peggy’s apartment because the lease was up on their own. Neither of them were particularly eager to return to their families for the summer. Both of them were busy preparing for law school anyway!

Even though Bucky was busy with his internship, he couldn’t get Y/N off his mind. He thought about her constantly, wondering what she was doing, how she was feeling, who she was with? As the summer came to an end, Bucky was offered a job with the modelling agency Sam had signed with, they needed more photographers on their staff and they loved Bucky’s work.

He was watching Robin Hood with Sam when his phone buzzed, a text from an unknown number. He opened it with a sigh, probably something about work he thought.

However, when he realised that it wasn’t, his heart soared.

Hey Buck. Long time no anything. I’m coming back this weekend & I got no place to go! What’s a girl got to do for a guy to pick her up from the airport?

He read and re-read the message over and over again, he practically jumped on Sam with excitement. He was as giddy as a schoolgirl before he quickly typed back.

Bucky: I dunno, doll. Maybe don’t ignore a guy for half a fucking year

Y/N: Absence makes the heart grow fonder

Bucky: I dunno my new roommate is pretty cute

He snapped a selfie with Sam, both of them pulling faces and sent it over to her.

Y/N: Fuck!!! How can I compete?

Bucky: idk 

Y/N: I think I can come up with a few ideas. But you’ll have to wait until Friday.

Bucky: Think I’ve waited long enough, doll

Bucky was glued to his phone for the rest of the week, texting her every opportunity he got. 

‘You got yourself a girlfriend, James?’ Carol at work teased. ‘I have never seen you look this happy before!’

He rolled his eyes at the blonde woman, ‘Are you jealous?’

She laughed, ‘I’m fuckin’ gay you dumbass.’

‘My best friend is coming home from Paris tonight,  she was over there for six months. And we had a deal that we wouldn’t talk to each other because...well...it’s a long story.’

Carol smiled at him, ‘So you fucked her over?’

He rubbed the back of his head, looking slightly ashamed.

‘Yes. I really, really did.’

Carol watched him carefully, seeing how his face fell at her words. 

‘Look, I’m sorry if I overstepped.’

He shook his head, ‘No, you really haven’t. You’re right, and the six months without her made me change my mind about how I treated her. I was a terrible friend and an even worse boyfriend. I miss her so much.’

Carol smiled brightly, ‘In all the time I’ve known you James, and I mean it’s been a whole month, I have never see you look so happy. So how abouts you take the rest of the day off. I won’t tell, Scout’s honour. And you can get ready to get your girl back.’

He literally jumped at her words, grabbing all his stuff as quickly as he could.

‘I could kiss you, Carol, ya know that!?’ 

‘That’s not how you’re gonna win your girl back!’ she teased hitting him over the head lightly.

Bucky was anxiously standing at arrivals, what if she didn’t come? Yes, he was being irrational. Completely irrational. But he was nervous. More nervous than he had ever been in his life. But all that worry washed away when she came around the corner. Her skin was darker than it had been when she left, her hair longer but her smile was the same. Her whole face lit up when she smiled, her eyes shone and her nose scrunched up. And when she saw him, standing there, shuffling from foot to foot, hands in his pockets, she beamed.

Her smile lit up the whole room. And she threw herself into his arms, her legs wrapping around his waist as he lifted her. Her two suitcases completely forgotten as she kissed him. Just like that they melted into one another again. It was so easy, they didn’t need to say the words that had been unspoken for six months. The kiss was enough. The whole world drifted away as they reunited, the other passengers and people milling around completely forgotten.

When they finally pulled away after what felt like hours and also just a few seconds, she was crying. Sobs wracked her chest as she clung to him.

‘I adore you, James Buchanan Barnes. I missed you terribly. Every single day, I wanted to call you, hear your voice. I wanted to know what you were doing, every day. Nat kept me up to date. Well as up to date as she could. But I needed to hear it from you,’ she whispered.

‘I love you with all my heart. These past six months have been the hardest in my whole life. I wanted you with me the whole time. But I know now that it was the right thing to do. It’s what we needed,’ she said, conviction in her voice.

He smiled, setting her down on the ground after she dried her tears. He took her suitcases from her as he walked out to the car.

‘Y/N, I spent the last six months desperately lonely. I was surrounded by people but they weren’t you. I always knew you were the most important part of my life but without you there it was like I wasn’t whole. I realise what we were doing was stupid. I will never care for anyone the way I care for you,’ he told her as they stood by his car.

‘I love you so much. And I know, I know no matter how many years we are together, I’ll never be able to tell you how much I adore you. And I can never make up for the stupidity of these last few months. And I can never apologise enough to you for how I treated you.’

She shook her head, ‘I was just as bad as you. We were...stupid. We still are stupid. I don’t think and I don’t expect our relationship to be perfect now. But I know we will do this properly this time. I won’t run away anymore. I promise, that I will do whatever work needs to be done to make this work. Because I know this is real life, it isn’t a fairy tale. And relationships are hard but it’s worth it. It’ll all be worth it. Because I love you more than anything in this world.’

He smiled at her as he pulled her in for another kiss. He couldn’t get enough of her, his hands were everywhere. Over the years, he had memorised the way she felt under his touch. And he had found solace in that over the past six months. But nothing was as good as the real thing. How she reacted to his touch, how she moaned into his mouth.

He had to force himself to pull away from her, because he wouldn’t be able to contain himself. He knew he couldn’t be trusted not to push her into the car in the public car park and fuck her. He hopped into the car and she followed suit, giggling like a school girl, telling him all about Paris and how amazing it was. How her boss had recommended her to fashion houses here in New York and how she had interviews lined up with them already. She was babbling so much, and Bucky was enticed. He loved her voice. He loved to see her so happy.

Finally he pulled into his parking space at their apartment. 

‘Sam has moved into your room,’ he said. ‘But he’s out for the night. So...’

She smiled softly, her eyes not meeting his. 

‘I guess I’ll have to go apartment hunting huh?’ she said as Bucky took her suitcases out of the car.

‘Absolutely fuckin’ not!’ he told her.

She laughed softly, ‘James Barnes, is that your way of asking me to move in with ya?’

He chuckled as they made their way into the apartment, he pressed the elevator button to their floor.

‘Amn’t I always asking you to do things the wrong way around?’ he teased.

‘Always!’

She giggled, shaking her head watching him carefully as the elevator brought them to the floor.

‘Nat and Sharon moved in with Peggy and Steve,’ he told her as he opened the door to the apartment. 

She looked around, not much had changed. She hadn’t expected it to, she had only been gone for six months. But there were certain things that were different, the couch had been moved. There were pizza boxes, everywhere - how Bucky and Sam were in shape when they ate like pigs never failed to shock her. 

‘I’m sure you’re exhausted, doll,’ he said, as he brought her into the bedroom. ‘Jetlag and all that. You can nap? And we can order food in a little bit, if you’d like?’

She smiled as she sat on his bed, her eyes taking in everything. She missed him so fucking much, she couldn’t believe it. Her heart ached at the smell of him, the way her name rolled off his tongue and how he knew exactly how to make her smile. She patted the bed beside her.

‘Cuddle me Buck?’ she asked.

He smiled as he kicked his shoes off and pulled her in for a bear hug as they fell back onto the bed. She fit perfectly in his arms, like they were made for each other. And she truly believed they were made for one another. No matter how stupid she sounded saying it, he was her soulmate. And he knew it too. He knew that they had almost ruined everything with their own egos and stupidity.

His lips met hers in the softest of touches, eyes fluttering close and slowly, the kiss deepens, tongues pressing against one another. She sunk into him, her arms wrapping around his shoulders, he rolled her onto her back, so he was hovering over her. He never broke the kiss, he never wanted to stop kissing her. He had six months to make up for. Six months without her lips.

Slowly, he pulled away from her lips, kissing over her jawline, down her neck, licking and nipping over the sensitive skin - knowing exactly how to get those soft moans from her plump lips. 

‘I love you, Bucky,’ she whispered.

He smiled at her words, pulling her oversized jumper over her head. 

‘I love you so much, Y/N,’ he told her as he continued to kiss over her skin. 

And just like that everything fell into place, they spent the next 24 hours in bed. Finally, Sam burst into the room and marched her out of the apartment, across the hall to the waiting surprise party. Okay, it wasn’t really a party, it was just Sam, Bucky, Steve, Peggy, Nat and Sharon. But she was thankful for it, they drank, played Cards Against Humanity, she showed pictures of her time in Paris. Bucky held his breath when Sharon asked were their any Parisian men that caught her fancy.

She shook her head, ‘Naw. Not my type.’

She smiled at Bucky as he squeezed her hand as they spent the rest of the night laughing and teasing one another. She sighed as she leaned against Bucky’s chest. This was it, this was perfection. She loved her time in Paris, she loved the opportunities she got. But she knew here, in Bucky’s arms surrounded by her best friends, was where she was meant to be and there was no hope in hell that she would be leaving them again.

TAG LIST OPEN

@nephalem67, @mia-at-work, @crybbysarahjane, @rainbowkisses31, @mcuimxgine, @rhiisnotawitch, @marvhellove, @myrabbitholetoneverland, @metalarmlover, @vogueworthy-barnes, @aurajitsu,@savemesteeb​,  @drunkinthemiddleoftheday​, @valeriae2903​​​,  @marsnothere​,    @kayleeflower ,  @sophiatomlinson23 , @randomstoriesofabunny ,@evolutionofkatep , @jessxxoxx , @anelaokalanii, @slender--spirit  , @the-craziestone, @writing-for-a-chance @lilypalmer1987 @justmesadgirl , @funkenniffler, @useless-creature-213, @sebatianstanisbae, @sexyvixen7, @hadesgirl1015, @amillionfandoms-onlyoneme, @wisestydia-15,@australianhorrorstory, @learisa,  @moonraeblack​, @stressedasalways @encounterthepast @tomshollandz @jediturtlelover​ @cutegyrl927​ @tuliptx​, @whooolemilk​  @ka-x-in​  @nikolett3​, @jbarnes87​  @merlinlover​  @lovely-geek​  @lizfawn​  @piensa-bonito​ @swtmckngbrd @songsaboutcupcakes @shirukitsune​ @anamcg317  @rileyloves5​  @unadulteredscreams​

#college au #captain america college au #bucky barnes college au #bucky college au #student!bucky barnes #winter soldier college au #the winter soldier #the winter solider x reader #winter solider #bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #white wolf #white wolf x reader #marvel x reader #marvel fan fiction #marvel insert #fanfic #fanfiction #sebastian stan #sebastian stan characters

[loptrcoptr]

this woman who I will be an independent contractor for (and who is possibly the Worst Person in the state) wants me to wrote a bio for myself for riding lessons at her barns and I’m like… dude idk lol I went to Lots of College, I don’t exactly have a long list of clinics and trainers to point out, I have been too broke for that for approximately ten years, I’m… a Horse Grifter. I have no skills but the skills of a mediocre con man in the 19th century, I’m less “talented” and more “convenient”

#personal #she was like ‘can you toss my horses at x place some hay tonight?’ and I said ok because do n a stupid fuckwad #expecting there would be nine horses and I’d only have to toss them hay BEFORE I WOILD LEAVE #TO FEED HER OTHER HORSES #WHICH I FEED SUN MON WEDS ALWAYS ANYWAYS #but no no no. I get there the gates closed I have to crawl under #there are four more horses than I thought there’d be. I’m not sure whether they #got their grain today or not #so o end up giving grain and supplements and random ass shit #and TWO HAY BALES (I am five feet tall and Not Strong) to thirteen fucking horses #trying to soak shit for the old ones so they don’t die of dehydration out in the ninety degree heat ofc #running around trying to find the horses in a paddock that I hadn’t been warned about #while a lady at the gate honks at me because my car is in her way… #I got paid for this but f u c k it was not enough I was wearing a sundress and sandals bc id come from work #and it was 90 degrees and enough work for two ppl #anyway! hate this woman and dunno what the fuck to tell her to advertise for me because a) hell do I say about me and b) she’ll do whatever #she wants in the end anyway