I would just like to say this before things go further.
Things will be taking a bit of a dark turn. Subjects that may make people uncomfortable have a chance of coming up, and I want to make it ABSOLUTELY clear that I do not condone or enjoy murder, abuse, grooming, or anything else in real life.
I wanted to get that out there before things got too rough. Thank you all so much for the support!! <3
When are UEFA and FIFA going to protect women in football??? Instead of letting women push open doors, how about close the doors for men like Rubiales and Vilda?!
Reading back on some of my old nevermore stuff and I gave will a spine because I really hoped he'd get to keep a bit of an attitude on his own even without monty
me when i finally hyperfixate on something normal that isn’t an niche thing/character/dynamic/ship in a game/show: finally! im normal again!(<-was never normal)
Apologies for this blog being inactive, I've been caught up with school :> (if anyone's curious, I'm majoring in Aerospace Engineering, so there's a lot of classes I have to do lol)
I've also been improving my art behind the scenes, I really want this game to look good so please bear with me <3
Israel's bombing Rafah on a holy day because they're fucking sickos whose ethnostate was built on genocide and apartheid. Quit focusing on the Oscars and call for a free Palestine.
i think ppl should make their characters with scars not have trauma like yeah this is jeff he has a big old scar on his left check because he was playing with the neighbors cat
i dedicate myself to game design because it's my only talent that i'm actually decent at. i'm too slow for visual art, too emotionally challenged for writing, and not educated enough for music.
most of this i've accepted, i've known my whole life handiwork isn't my strong suit, and i'm okay just noodling around on the piano not knowing how to play a melody. but not being able to write hurts. because on some level, writing feels like one of the truest forms of expression. to write is to put a piece of yourself into the world. for lack of a better word, it is deeply human. and i have always, ALWAYS struggled to write compelling fiction, even though i've wanted to for so long. what do you think this tells me about myself? i feel genuinely defective, emotionally, for not being able to express myself in this way. it feels like the self that i would even be expressing, it's just worse in some way. i see posts about common writing problems and think "oh, i do that, must be because i'm a defective human." like the thing i just reblogged.
i feel like flaws in my writing reflect flaws in my character, which is why i don't even bother to write anymore. i flee into the realm of game mechanics, the kind of thing that is an artistic expression, but one where i can much more easily lean into the realm of craftsmanship and mechanical shine. what angie nyx's rock paper scissors 2 says about me is a bit more difficult to make out, and it generally leans inoffensive. in truth i'm scared to express myself in a way that makes genuine art. i'm afraid to put my heart on display, because my heart simply sucks real bad.