#and this was kind of a break | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

buggachat · 7 months

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deserved

#ml #miraculous #miraculous ladybug #ml paris special #ml paris #ml spoilers #claw noir #shadybug #toxinelle #griffe noire #shadyclaw #toxigriffe #ladynoir #<- kind of?#my art #I TOLD MYSELF I WOULD TAKE A BREAK FROM DRAWING BUT THEN MY INTERNET WENT OUT AND I HAD NOTHING ELSE TO DO #had to use a different application than usual though because capitalism is a scourge so my usual art program doesn't work offline

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andthebeanstalk · 11 months

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Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

#hlep #original #mental health #my sympathies and empathies to anyone who has to rely on this kind of hlep to get what they need.#the people in my life who most need to see this post are my family but even if they did I sincerely doubt they would internalize it #i've tried to break thru to them so many times it makes my head hurt. so i am focusing on boundaries and on finding other forms of support #and this thing i learned today helps me validate those boundaries. the example with the milk was from my therapist.#the example with the towing company was a real thing that happened with my parents a few months ago while I was age 28. 28!#a full adult age! it is so infantilizing as a disabled adult to seek assistance and support from ableist parents.#they were real mad i was mad tho. and the spoons i spent trying to explain it were only the latest in a long line of #huge family-related spoon expenditures. distance and the ability to enforce boundaries helps. haven't talked to sisters for literally the #longest period of my whole life. people really believe that if they love you and try to help you they can do no wrong.#and those people are NOT great allies to the chronically sick folks in their lives.#you can adore someone and still fuck up and hurt them so bad. will your pride refuse to accept what you've done and lash out instead?#or will you have courage and be kind? will you learn and grow? all of us have prejudices and practices we are not yet aware of.#no one is pure. but will you be kind? will you be a good friend? will you grow? i hope i grow. i hope i always make the choice to grow.#i hope with every year i age i get better and better at making people feel the opposite of how my family's ableism has made me feel #i will see them seen and hear them heard and smile at their smiles. make them feel smart and held and strong.#just like i do now but even better! i am always learning better ways to be kind so i don't see why i would stop

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egophiliac · 6 months

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LET THE BOY HAVE AN EDUCATION

officially at the point where we're starting to see where it's all headed and I am just going NYEEHEEHEE in delight at it all. ahhh...next week can't come soon enough...

#art #twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland spoilers #stage in playful land #stage in playfulland #leona: (devises an actually somewhat clever plan to take out the staff-puppets without breaking any rules)#leona: (taken out two seconds later because he sat down in the wrong place)#at this point i'm half expecting the ssr boys to actually bust in with a big sandwich platter or something #a cake with 'please don't kidnap people :)' written on it in shaky icing #kalim isn't good at plans but he DOES throw a good shindig and by god he's going to play to his strengths #also IT WASN'T SHINY TICKETS IT WAS GIDEL?!#MY BOY #MY BEAUTIFUL MAGICAL FELINE BOY #i mean i'm assuming at this point but that seems to be the implication #genuinely kind of shocked that they actually WERE being magicked into being extra gullible #it was ✨foreshadowing✨ all along...#the blot though! what about the blot!#is that going to be an issue or are we going to have enough to deal with already!#i have rocketed from 'i find these villains entertaining' to 'i am suddenly incredibly invested in them as characters'#LOOK there is one thing better than characters with sort of unhealthy codependent relationships #and that is characters with sort of unhealthy codependent relationships but TWIST IT'S NOT THE WAY YOU THINK #nyeeheeheeeeeee

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tarantula-hawk-wasp · 10 months

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Earth’s hottest day ever recorded by human instruments

Better way to phrase this is : top 3 hottest daily average-global-temperatures ever recorded by human instruments were this week.

#climate change #news #breaking news #destiel news #global warming #just saw this on the news and now I have to go back to writing my essay as of earth isn’t in crisis #phrased this kind of poorly bc I was basing it on what the news anchor said and then found the article on the channels website

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rongzhi · 4 months

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A winter reminder

English added by me :)

#eye strain #flashing #douyin #video #tiktok #含亮老师 #dlkafjkl you do not knooooow the intense whiplash these collabs always give me #idk if they do this on tiktok but it's such like a part of douyin culture lolol #that and the health reminders from celebrities #the women's pingpong team like PUT YOUR PHONE DOWN TAKE A BREAK #hmmm typo..... tied should be tidied....#but the vibe is kind of still there so it's good it's cool i don't care #psa #chinese weapons

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kittysauce · 7 months

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au where L and Light fall in love during the yotsuba arc ............... i think its a crazy interesting concept

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cowboy-garfield · 2 years

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POV you're a scientist at One Direction Inc. breeding brain fungus that makes white women hallucinate gay relationships

#one direction #breaking bad #fake or not there is definitely some kind of cordyceps in 1D truthers minds lmao #larry stylinson #larry shippers #skit yells

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callibunnii · 10 months

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ayo let’s goo IM UNSAHDOWBANNED

#callibunnii talks #i’m on kind of a break rn tho so i still won’t be as active but hey i finally got the problem fixed<3 wwww

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soepwashere · 7 months

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I was rereading the rise comics recently and I feel the need to point out that Mikey is carrying Raph and Leo on his shoulders so casually in these panels

#rottmnt #save rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #tmnt 2018 #rottmnt mikey #rottmnt leo #rottmnt raph #rottmnt stuff #he does ask if raph can be on the bottom next time in the first panel #but aside from that he doesn’t seem to break much of a sweat lol #add this to the catalog of mikey being very strong #he is carrying his two older brothers just like that and we need to talk about it #i wonder if he’s ever tried to carry all of them skjsjfkskfd #kind of want to draw something with this now…#but i already have so many ideas that i haven’t even started help

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jajanvm-imbi · 10 months

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My two favorite anarchists 🥰🥰

#everyones been saying it so ill say it too #they would TOTALLY be besties and you KNOW IT #encouraging one of the protagonists to question authority and challenge the misguided and corrupt system?#helping one of the protagonists break out of jail?#being the ONLY ONE to stand by one of the protagonists in the face of oppression and questionable practices?#but also being kind to their friends and genuinely caring about them?#they would ABSOLUTELY be besties #i love them for it #nimona #spider punk #hobie brown #nimona movie #nimona spoilers #nimona film #nimona netflix #across the spiderverse #spiderman across the spiderverse #hobie spiderverse #atsv

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hyunpic · 3 months

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just hyunjin and his mega burrito

#hyunjin #skz #stray kids #bystay #gifs #this is like a pov of us being his tv while he’s looking some kind of drama from it #his fingers kinda in the shape of a heart 🥹#he’s so funny he looks so sad and defeated by the burrito shsjnx #ik the bathroom break will be terrible for him after consuming that like im praying for u hyunebun

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tanglepelt · 9 months

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Dc x dp idea 100

John likes to trick beings to getting himself a good deal and screwing the entities over. So he does this with the new ghost king.

He somehow worded the deal to keep the king in his home realm. You know to keep Danny in the infinite realm unable to attack the earthly realm.

This backfires. And backfires hard. Danny’s home realm is still the earthly one. All John did was not let him back into the realm.

Danny is thrilled. And living his best life. No more council meetings, the paperwork is stuck in the keep, the Observants can’t force him to do kingly duties and above all else. He is passing all of his classes. Scheduled fights with his rogues help as well.

John. Well he’s not having a good time. The Observants are screaming at him, the new king is stuck in earth who knows what he is up to, and he’s had visits from all of Danny’s ghost guardians to yell at him.

John has to break the deal.

Danny doesn’t want to.

When Danny eventually agrees to discuss it. He shows up with a ghost lawyer, sam, and Jazz all in order to secure Danny a good deal. Maybe tucker as well.

Danny wants at least rated M and movie tickets for him and his friends for life, and of course Martian manhunters autograph.

Jazz wants him to get a guarantee that they would leave him alone.

Sam wants them to guarantee ghost protection and end the Giw.

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andy-clutterbuck · 1 month

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Rick Grimes in The Ones Who Live | 1x04 - What We

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egophiliac · 7 months

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What was your favorite of the flashbacks in Silver’s walk?

the acorn bracelet is VERY good, but I really really love Malleus humming (hummalleus? hummus?) to Silver. especially now that the song has Context. >:) we are in a soup of angst and I'm here with a spoon in each hand and a silly straw that leads directly to my brain.

#art #twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland spoilers #twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers #twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers #(sorry for being a while i was taking a bit of a socials break)#i think this is the same scene that opens with lilia singing meleanor's lullaby to silver #before malleus walked through the door and lilia went 'here have a baby BYEEEE'#mmm yes. delightful.#and i know i've already talked about it but malleus' immediate reaction being 'gross. what is this.' is still great #sometimes he really is just a dumb teenager and i love it #i also love the spoon scene a lot for being kind of the ur-example of cute fluffy ao3 domestic diasomnias. but that's in sebek's map so #(i think most of the domestic life stuff is actually in sebek's)#(all that sugar-sweetness would dissolve under silver's tears)

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goblin-social · 1 month

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Happy Ides, everyone. Stab Stab Stab Stab Stab Stab Stab Stab...

#ides of march #goblin #Julius kinds of break the mobile version of the goblin #because I totally forgot to disable it there #but it totally worths it

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secondbeatsongs · 1 year

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with twitter imploding, people are talking about how much it'll suck to have celebrities and brands on here, but...I think celebrities can exist on tumblr in a healthy way.

because I've already seen it happen.

I don't know if you guys remember, but there used to be a decent number of celebrities on here! I mean, the white house had an official tumblr! so did my local library for some reason! everyone thought tumblr was the place to be!

we had George Takei, Taylor Swift, Lady Gaga, Hayley Williams, Ariana Grande, Dylan Marron, Dante Basco, Rebecca Sugar, John Green, Hannah Hart, Jacksfilms, Daniel Howell, and Ashens to name a few, as well as brand accounts for Doctor Who, Sherlock, Denny's, and so many others.

(Cole Sprouse was even on here, and it was fine. don't act like it wasn't. it was really not a big deal! it was fine!)

there were plenty of celebrities and brands on tumblr a decade ago - and it worked fine when people knew to stay in their lane!

did Obama's official account give a shit when people posted Obamney slash? absolutely not!

did we pay attention to whatever the brand accounts were posting? we did not!

and so we existed pretty well together on this site - because, after all, we don't have to look at anything we don't want to. we can block people. and they can block us. and we can keep posting what we want, no matter what any celebs or brands have to say about it, just like it's always been.

the only thing I think needs to change is, well...hey...remember how I mentioned John Green and Rebecca Sugar up there?

yeah the reason we don't see them on here anymore isn't because tumblr isn't a place they'd thrive - it's because a bunch of assholes harassed them until they left.

and that's not fucking okay.

so look, if you see celebs/brands on here, follow them, or don't! block them and ignore them, or don't!

but if you send threats and harassment to anyone on here, whether it be a celebrity, brand, or average tumblr user, you are the asshole. full stop. sending threats to other people is never okay. never.

and yes, this goes for the corporate accounts too! those are still run by people!

it's somebody's job to run those accounts, and guess what! that poor, probably-underpaid person doesn't deserve to get sent gore and death threats because their job is running a corporate tumblr account!

just, whatever happens when twitter explodes and dies a horrible death, it's gonna be okay. but please be kind. above everything else, please, I am fucking begging you, be kind.

it's really the most important part of thriving here

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