#and this 13 year stint of feeling like an outcast in my own skin and in my own environment is getting so old

[pop-punklouis]

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#i know i’m always the one egging you guys on and supporting you and telling you not to compare yourself to others #but jfc could i use that own advice on myself #i’m so sick and tired of feeling inadequate or behind or not talented enough #while i see others in my field (or in general) thriving #some even younger than me and i try to not let it get to me or to trust my own timeline #but this pandemic has really fucked me up and how i view myself and my potential #as a writer... as a functioning person in my field... as someone who knows what the fuck they want to do in their field.... #as someone who cannot believe in themselves even though they desperately try to #i feel so excluded and less than in so many aspect of my life and what i thought i loved or wanted to be #and i’m just so sick so so so sick of feeling lost and passed by #and this 13 year stint of feeling like an outcast in my own skin and in my own environment is getting so old #i just want to feel like i belong and feel like i’m on some sort of path towards anything rewarding lmfao #i’m in such a bad headspace but idk what to do it won’t go away!!!!!! #i need to take a break from the internet i just need to get away it’s really causing a harmful toll to my mind and body #i love you guys idk i just needed to vent #i hope you’re all well #i’ll see you sometime maybe soon idk