#and then we got an engaged couple and i REALLY hope they don't break up for the main characters to get together

[yxngbxkkie]

i love you (h.j)

so, i found a tik tok that you can watch here of hannie saying i love you. and, i wanted to write a fic based on it. it's kinda sad but it has a happy ending 🥹 i hope you guys like it! 💓

feedback is appreciated 🥰

"Are you seriously being this way?" Jisung asks you with pointed eyes, his arms crossed over his chest. "I told you that this month's going to be busy. Our comeback is coming up quickly."

You scoff and run a hand through your hair, getting frustrated. "Okay, and I get that," you tell him. "But, I also thought that you'd make a little time for your fiancé."

The dark brunette rolls his eyes before walking towards the front door. "You're really going to throw that in my face? You said you understood. This is my life. It's always going to be this way," he mentions, putting his shoes back on.

"Where are you going?" You ask him, looking towards the clock.

"I'm going back to the studio. I'm not going to sit here and argue with you over stuff you already know, Y/N," Jisung sighs, opening the door to your shared apartment. "You're being really clingy right now, and I just… I can't handle it."

You purse your lips as tears begin to pool in your eyes. "God forbid I worry about you, Jisung," you laugh, shaking your head. "If you don't want someone clingy, maybe we shouldn't get married."

Silence fills the shared space, and both of you avoid eye contact with one another. Tears begin to slide down your cheeks, feeling a little hurt that he's not fighting to stay with you.

You walk away from him first, heading into your bedroom. You flinch a bit when you hear the front door shut, silence continuing to fill your apartment.

Your lip quivers as you look down at your engagement ring. A sob escapes your lips as you slide the ring off of your fingers, gently placing it on the dresser.

After trying to stop yourself from crying so much, you grab your duffel bag out of the closet. You stuff some clothes into it, packing everything you might need for the next couple of days.

A part of you wants to text Jisung to let him know that you're not going to be home. But, another part of you wants him to worry. Maybe he'll come to his senses and not let this small argument ruin your relationship.

You tuck your hair behind your ears before wiping the tear streaks from your face. You slip your shoes on and walk out the front door, locking it behind you.

~

Jisung plops down in Chan's chair, releasing a deep sigh. He rubs his hands along his face as the argument he had with you replays in his head.

He checks his phone and frowns at the photo of you on his lock screen. Jisung slowly closes his eyes, knowing that he's not going to get anything done in this state.

He scrolls through his contact list and decides to call Minho. He presses the phone against his ear while staring at the white table.

"Ya," Minho answers after the third ring, hearing the sound of oil bubbling in the background.

"Minho hyung," Jisung starts to break down, tears spilling from his round eyes. "I think I fucked up."

"What happened? Where are you?" Minho asks him.

Jisung wipes his eyes while leaning back in the computer chair. "I'm in Chan's studio," he mentions, sniffling a bit. "Y/N and I got into an argument… a-and now I don't even know if we're together anymore."

"Ya, Han Jisung, I swear," Minho sighs. "You need to go back home right now and make up for whatever argument you had. Understand? Otherwise, you're going to lose her."

"O-Okay. I'll head there now," Jisung whispers into the phone, shoving all of his stuff back into his bag. "I'll talk to you later, hyung."

"Let me know what happens, okay?" Minho's worried voice reaches Jisung's ears, causing the younger boy to nod his head.

He hangs up the phone afterward and quickly rushes out of the studio. It doesn't take him very long to get back home. He pulls his house keys from inside his pocket, unlocking the door before opening it.

His heart drops at the sight of an empty apartment. The only light comes from the oven in the kitchen. "Y/N?" He calls out your name, slipping his shoes off.

Jisung's heart races in his chest as he checks each room. He checks the bedroom last and notices the ring sitting on the dresser. He swallows the lump in his throat, tears quickly pooling.

"No, no, no," he mutters to himself, gripping the ring until his knuckles turn white. He grabs his phone with his free hand, typing in your number before calling. He starts to panic when it immediately goes to voice-mail.

He takes deep breaths, feeling an anxiety attack coming on. Jisung redials your number, calling again. "Come on, baby, please," he begs to himself as he tries to call for a third time, getting the same result.

His hands shake as he looks at the screen, seeing your cheery smile break his heart more than it already is. He swallows the lump in his throat, moving to sit against the wall.

"I guess I'll just leave a message…" He whispers, dialing your number.

~

You wake up feeling like absolute shit. A groan leaves your lips, bringing a hand to your forehead. "This is what I get for crying myself to sleep," you sigh, pushing the covers off of you.

You glance around the hotel room you're staying in, your chest clenching at the thought of what happened yesterday. You reach for your phone and turn it on for the first time in twelve hours.

The first notification that pops up is a voice-mail from Jisung. You hover your finger over the message, debating on whether or not you should listen to it. You swallow the lump in your throat and decide to listen to it.

You press play and press the phone against your ear. Your heart strings tug as soon as Jisungs voice starts. "Instead of apologizing, I'll say I love you," he starts, noticing his voice is a bit raspy and you frown. "Thank you for worrying about me, I love you. Really, thank you. I love you. I love you so much. I love you immensely. I love you endlessly. I love you completely. I love you so much. I really love you. I love you the most. I love you the most in the world. I completely, madly love you."

By the time the voice-mail finishes, you're crying your eyes out. You cover your mouth with your free hand, not wanting to be too loud with your sobs. You pull the device away from your ear, not hesitating to call him back.

You click on his contact and press the phone to your ear again, listening to it ring. After the fifth ring, Jisung picks up. "Honey?" He mutters, causing your breath to hitch. "Baby, listen, I-I'm so sorry. I-I didn't mean to call you clingy. It's just… this comeback is really exhausting, and I took it out on you. A-And I know that's not an excuse, but I don't want to lose you. I won't survive."

"Jisung," you cry out, his words making your heart hurt even more. "I don't want to lose you either."

"Come home, please," he begs before mumbling incoherently. Your lip trembles as Jisung starts to cry on his side of the phone. "I love you so much. I'll work on myself, I promise. Please marry me still."

"I'll still marry you, baby," you whisper, sniffling. "I'm sorry I left. I'm coming home right now."

You stand up from the bed, quickly making it before gathering your things. Jisung's still on the phone with you, and his voice comes through the device.

"You have nothing to apologize about, honey. This is all my fault," he reassures you. "When you come home, can I give you a kiss?"

A breathy laugh escapes your lips, and you grab a tissue to wipe your nose with. "Yeah, baby, you can give me a kiss," you tell him, feeling your heart flutter in your chest. You pause what you're doing as your gaze is fixed on the marble sink. "You pinky promise this won't happen again?"

"Cross my heart and hope to die, honey. I will never, ever do this again. I love you."

"I love you, Han Jisung."

~

tagging: @thewxntersoldier @reddesert-healourblues @spacegirlstuff @moon0fthenight @foxinnie8

#han jisung #han jisung x you #han jisung x y/n #han jisung x reader #han jisung imagine #han jisung imagines #han jisung angst #han jisung fluff #han jisung fanfiction #han jisung fanfic #han jisung fic #stray kids #stray kids imagines #stray kids imagine #stray kids x reader #stray kids x y/n #stray kids x you #stray kids fanfiction #stray kids fanfic #stray kids fic #stray kids angst #stray kids scenarios #lee minho #skz imagine #skz #skz x y/n #skz x you #skz x reader #skz imagines

[queenshelby]

An Illicit Affair

Part 16: The Talk

Pairing: Cillian Murphy (46) x Reader (23)

Warning: Age-Gap, Taboo Relationship, Infidelity

When you arrived at his room however, you saw that Danielle had returned, waiting for Cillian to be discharged. It was evident to you that they had been arguing again and it appeared to be intensifying by the second.

You stood at the doorway, silently watching the two of them engage in a heated conversation. Their voices grew louder and more aggressive, and you could sense the tension radiating between them.

"You need to stop pulling that shit and see a fucking psychiatrist," Cillian snapped, glaring at Danielle. "You're destroying our family with your behavior," he growled.

"I am destroying our family?" she spat back. "Why don't you just admit that you're having an affair? Because your infidelity is really what is breaking us up," Danielle said, and even though she had never suspected you to be the one he was cheating on her with, she knew that there was someone else for real this time. And, honestly, she was furious.

"No," Cillian denied vehemently, his anger flaring up. "It's you who is making everyone miserable," he countered harshly, pointing at her. "If you weren't so damn manipulating and controlling then maybe we wouldn't be in this situation," he yelled, causing Danielle to shake her head in disbelief. 

"You never cared for me Cillian, so don't make it out to be my fault," she spoke up suddenly, staring daggers at Cillian. "I really think that you are the one who should see a psychiatrist not me. You clearly have issues" she snarled, her tone laced with venom.

 "Maybe you're right. Maybe I should go to therapy to figure out why I stayed with you for so long," he retorted bitterly, his voice trembling with rage.

"You aren't going to leave me Cillian. We both know that you can't," Danielle mused and it was at this moment that you ought to interrupt their conversation. 

"Excuse me," you said, stepping into the room confidently, catching their attention. "I have the discharge papers ready," you announced calmly, glancing between Cillian and Danielle.

"You can head home now," you added, approaching the couple while handing the documents to Cillian.

"Thank you, Y/N," Cillian replied gratefully, accepting the papers with a nod.

"Do you need help dressing?" you offered kindly, gesturing towards his clothes.

"No, I got it," Cillian assured you, starting to dress independently despite his weakened state. You turned your attention to Danielle, who remained silent during this exchange.

She seemed lost in thought, her eyes wandering aimlessly around the room. Her hands twisted nervously in her lap, betraying the turmoil inside her. You couldn't help but wonder what was going through her mind.

"Thank you Y/N," she eventually said, her voice sounding softer and more composed. "I hope we haven't taken up too much of your time," she added apologetically.

"Not at all," you replied cheerfully, smiling politely. "I'm happy to help," you assured her while watching Cillian getting dressed, putting on his jumper and jacket.

"When will you be heading back to Dublin?" you then asked them both, addressing the topic of Cillian's departure tactfully.

"I am hoping to return tomorrow or the day after," Cillian answered, slipping on his shoes effortlessly. "I have some commitments that I can't delay any longer," he explained, casting a fleeting glance at Danielle who appeared visibly frustrated.

"And I will be heading home tonight," she piped up brusquely, her tone clipped and curt. "It's my mother's birthday, but Cillian and her don't really get along," she admitted awkwardly, averting her gaze. 

"Alright, uhm, well... all the best," you told them sincerely, waving goodbye as they left the hospital together.

You stared at the door long after they had disappeared, a knot forming in your stomach. You couldn't shake off the uneasy feeling that something was terribly wrong. But you had no idea what or how to fix it. You decided to focus on your work instead and immersed yourself in your tasks.

The end of your shift soon rolled around, and you found yourself looking forward to some downtime with Lucy.

She was still busy studying for her exams, but promised to join you later for dinner.

You headed back to the student accommodation, ready to unwind as, suddenly, your phone rang and you weren't really surprised when you saw Cillian's number pop up on the screen.

You let the call ring out, knowing that you shouldn't speak to him right now, especially after witnessing his argument with Danielle.

However, the urge to reach out to him grew stronger and, when you reached your destination, you couldn't resist dialing his number. After all, what was the harm in checking up on him?

"Hey Cills," you greeted him warmly, sitting down on your bed and resting your feet as he picked up the phone. "Sorry I missed your call," you apologized, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear.

"Oh, it's alright," Cillian assured you lightly, his voice sounding calmer and more relaxed. "I figured you must be busy with work," he added, his tone friendly and nonchalant.

"You sound better," you remarked, genuinely relieved to hear his improved demeanor. "Are you feeling okay?" you quizzed him, your brows lifting.

"Yeah, I'm doing much better, thanks," Cillian replied appreciatively.

"I mean, I've had some time to rest and gather my thoughts," he added, letting out a light sigh. "And I was wondering if we could talk?" Cillian proposed tentatively, his voice trailing off uncertainly.

"Of course," you replied instantly, eagerly grasping the opportunity to reconnect with him. "What's on your mind?" you encouraged, shifting onto your elbows and propping up your body, eager to listen attentively.

"I would much rather discuss this in person, Y/N. It's a delicate matter but I feel as though I owe you an explanation," Cillian started cautiously, his voice softening. 

"Do you want me to come to your place?" you asked, glancing at the clock on your wall. It was early evening, and you knew that Lucy would be returning soon.

"Yes, if that works for you," Cillian said. "I am staying at the Green Street Apartment Complex. Unit 256,"

Cillian informed you, his voice steady and confident and, despite the circumstances, your heart skipped a beat at the prospect of seeing Cillian again so soon.

"I'll be there in about thirty minutes," you assured him, reaching for the charger cable hanging loosely from your nightstand.

"See you soon," Cillian bid farewell, his voice conveying a mix of anticipation and uncertainty.

After ending the call, you paced around your room nervously, wondering how you were going to break the news to Lucy. She was such a stickler for rules and deadlines, and she hated it when you kept things from her. You knew that she would not be pleased to learn that you were meeting Cillian, especially considering the circumstances and, when you told her about it after she arrived at home, she gave you yet another lecture about not getting involved with a married man. 

"Seriously, Y/N?" she groaned with exasperation, her brown eyes widening with disbelief. "Again?" she muttered under her breath, shaking her head dismissively.

"I just wanted to check up on him," you protested weakly, feeling a pang of guilt creeping up your spine. "He had a bad argument with Danielle earlier at the hospital and I can't get it out of my head," you confessed hesitantly, averting your gaze guiltily.

"They were fighting, Lucy, and it wasn't like normal marital disputes. Something feels off," you admitted candidly, running a clammy hand through your tangled hair.

"Then you need to stay clear," Lucy advised sternly, fixing you with a meaningful look. "Don't become entangled in their mess," she cautioned, gripping your arm tightly."

"I won't," you reassured her, forcing a weak smile. "Like I said, I just want to see him and make sure he is okay," you insisted, rising from the bed and grabbing your coat.

"Is this why we pulled their files? James mentioned something about domestic abuse," Lucy interjected, raising her eyebrows skeptically. "Because that would be yet another reason not to get involved," she advised carefully after you explained the situation to her.

"Jesus, no, Cillian does not hit Danielle. That's utter nonesense," you defended him earnestly, shrugging your shoulders slightly. 

"Are you sure about that?" Lucy asked skeptically, raising a quizzical eyebrow. "Because, personally, I would be cautious," she murmured, eyeing you carefully.

"I trust my instincts, and my gut tells me that Cillian is not capable of that," you retorted defensively, shoving your hands into the pockets of your jeans.

"Well, all right, but remember what James said," Lucy reminded you gently, offering an understanding smile. "I just don't want you to put yourself in danger," she pleaded, wrapping a protective arm around your shoulders.

"Please call me if you need me," she urged, her brown eyes full of concern.

"Will do," you smiled reassuringly, pulling your coat tighter as you left the apartment.

The chilly air hit you like a cold splash of water, sending a shiver down your spine. You hurried to the nearest bus stop, trying to shake off the uneasiness that had settled deep within your bones.

The familiar chatter of people surrounding you did little to ease your nerves. All you could think about was Cillian and the less-than-ideal situation surrounding you both. 

You hopped onto the bus, scanning the seats for an empty spot. Finding one near the window, you collapsed into it, clutching your bag tightly. Your fingers fidgeted against the worn leather straps. Thoughts of Cillian consumed your mind, clouding your judgment and stealing your focus.

You attempted to distract yourself by counting passing buildings, but your thoughts inevitably wandered back to him until, finally, the bus reached Green Street, and you leaped off the vehicle, sprinting toward the apartment complex.

Inside, you buzzed the apartment number and waited patiently for Cillian to open the door. He opened the door via the intercom and, inside, you took the elevator to the top floor. 

The door slid open and you felt a wave of apprehension wash over you. You didn't want to intrude, nor interfere with their lives, but there was something unsettling about the pair of them. Your intuition was whispering warnings, telling you to turn back, but you brushed away the anxious feelings, stepping forward bravely.

The door creaked open to reveal Cillian standing there, wearing a white shirt and dark pants. He looked tired, haggard even, but he was still handsome as ever. He led you inside, asking you to sit down on the couch.

As you sat down, you noticed that the apartment was impeccably clean, almost sterile in appearance. The furniture looked expensive, yet lacked warmth and personality. Everything was ordered and neat, with no sign of clutter or misplaced items. Even the kitchen was spotless, devoid of crumbs or dishes.

"Would you like something to drink?" Cillian asked, his voice strained. You declined politely, and he sat down across from you, folding his hands in his lap. The silence stretched between you, each of you seemingly caught up in your own thoughts.

"What is this place? Are you renting it?" you questioned Cillian, peering around the immaculate living space.

"No, I actually bought it a few days ago," Cillian responded, a hint of pride coloring his voice. "It's still kind of bland, but I just need a space to get away sometime," he explained, his gaze drifting towards the cityscape outside the windows.

"A getaway house? Sounds nice," you commented, shifting uncomfortably on the couch. "I bet it's also super convenient since Max lives in the same building," you joked, attempting to alleviate the tension.

"Yeah, that was Danielle's idea. I suppose she needs someone to keeps tabs on me when I am away for work," Cillian chuckled, his expression turning sour. 

"Anyway, I apologize for earlier," Cillian said sheepishly, his voice softening. "That whole thing with Danielle was extremely upsetting," he mumbled, his voice cracking slightly. "I didn't expect it to escalate like that," he admitted, his face reddening.

"It's okay," you assured him, leaning forward, kissing him briefly on the lips. It was more like a peck, a sentiment of some sort and Cillian exhaled deeply, his posture relaxing ever so slightly. "Thanks, Y/N," he said softly, reaching for your hand. 

Your fingers intertwined with his, and a surge of electricity coursed through you. You couldn't resist the temptation; you inched closer to him, allowing your bodies to touch. Cillian reacted instantly, his grip tightening around your hand.

"Y/N," he murmured, the sound of your name echoing in the otherwise quiet room. "I don't fucking know what to do," he whispered, his voice trembling as he squeezed your hand tighter.  "I'm just a mess," he sighed heavily, his eyes filling with sadness.

"Do you want to talk about it?" you asked Cillian gently, squeezing his hand reassuringly.

"I don't know where to begin Y/N," he sighed, his voice laden with despair. "Everything seems to be falling apart," he added miserably, staring into space.

"Start anywhere," you coaxed, your heart pounding in your chest. "You can tell me anything," you promised, your gaze locked on his.

Cillian inhaled deeply, gathering his thoughts. "Danielle and I have been struggling for years, ever since my career took off in a way neither of us had expected. She always hated the exposure and fame and she had never been very confident within herself. She has always been quite jealous and controlling but, about four or five years ago, when I wanted a break from our marriage, she started accusing me of being unfaithful to her, which is also when she started to pull these stunts," he started to explain, shaking his head sadly.

"What kind of stunts?" you asked cautiously, your heart sinking with every word he uttered.

"She hurts herself," Cillian whispered, his voice barely audible. "She deliberately inflicts injuries upon herself and blames it on others," he explained, his voice cracking slightly. "It began with small accidents, but it quickly escalated into more serious injuries," he revealed, wincing in disgust.

"I know it sounds crazy, but she's doing it on purpose to get my attention and to make me stay with her," Cillian confided, his eyes pleading for understanding.  "She even threatened me that, if I leave her, she would tell Max and the press that I am abusing her," he disclosed, his voice trembling slightly. "I resigned myself to this for ages and, with me being away all the time, it's not really that bad, but then I met you and things changed Y/N," he explained reluctantly. "Now I want more than the marriage I am trapped in," he told you, his eyes shining brightly with unspoken longing.

Though you hadn't known it before, the connection between you two was undeniable. It was more than just sexual and, just as Cillian leaned back, running a hand through his thick hair, obviously wrestling with his thoughts, he appeared troubled but determined.

"I am so sorry Y/N," he whispered, his gaze locked on yours. "I should never have gotten you involved in this mess but I felt as though you had a right to know the truth," he confessed, his voice trembling slightly.

You remained silent, absorbing everything he had shared. The gravity of the situation weighed heavily on your heart, and you couldn't find the words to respond. Instead, you reached out and cupped his cheek, caressing it tenderly.

"Thank you for trusting me enough to share this," you managed to say, your voice hushed and soft. "It all makes sense now and I don't even know what to say, Cillian," you continued, your eyes filled with compassion.

"You don't need to say anything, Y/N," Cillian replied gently, brushing a stray lock of hair behind your ear. "In fact, I don't want you to," he continued softly, his blue eyes burning into yours. "Just you being here makes me feel better," he confessed, his breath hot against your skin before pulling you closer, wrapping his arms around you.

You could feel his muscles tense up as he rested his chin on your shoulder. His breathing became heavier, and you could smell traces of his cologne. You held him tight, rubbing his back soothingly. 

"I will help you figure this out," you comforted him, pressing your forehead against his. "We'll take it step by step," you whispered, holding him close just as Cillian's grip tightening around you. "You are amazing, you know that?" he murmured, kissing your neck as the intimacy between you intensified, and you both fell deeper into each other's embrace.

"I know," you whispered, nestling your head into his shoulder. "And so are you, Cillian," you murmured appreciatively, enjoying the warmth of his embrace.

He sighed, taking a deep breath before releasing it slowly. "This is insane, isn't it?" he murmured, his voice trembling slightly. "My life is a complete disaster. My wife has gone crazy and here I am, falling in love with my son's ex-girlfriend," Cillian rambled, burying his face in your hair. 

To be continued...

Tags:

@sunbeamseas @saint-ackerman @oatmealisweird @naxxsstuff @amanda08319 @r-m-cidnah @elysiannook @cillshot @infireddabdab @tastycakee @harrysbestiee @lilybabe22 @adalynlowell @henrywintersdearestgirl @ietss @thatgirlthatreadswattpad @ryiamarie @axionn

@heidimoreton @nela-cutie @futurecorps3 @delishen @nosebleeds-247 @thirteenis-myluckynumber @gills-lounge @hjmalmed @lost-fantasy @tiredkitten @sidechrisporn @smallsoulunknown @charqing-qing @hopefulinlove @aporiasposts @shycrybaby @me-and-your-husband @hjmalmed @lacontroller1991 @galxydefender @aporiasposts

@galxydefender @hunnibearrr @saint-ackerman @lunyyx @gentlemonsterjennie1 @ihavealotoffandomssorry @nadloves @lost-fantasy @nolucesn@mcavoy-girl @hjmalmed @bloodybagels @obeyme4life @richiesgroupie @blushykiss @tatumrileyslover @teawithsatanx @orijanko @rhaenyra4ever @xcinnamonmalfoyx @budugu @nadloves @kmc1989 @bloodybagels @obeyme4life @richiesgroupie @forgottenpeakywriter @smailaway @sophiaaguirred

#cillian murphy smut #cillian murphy #cillian murphy x reader #cillian murphy x you #cillian murphy x y/n #cillian murphy imagine

[writtenbymisunderstoodnerds]

With you, everything's okay (USWNT x ADHD Reader)

This is part 3 of the ADHD reader series. It's kinda long, but hope you enjoy!

Part one

Part two

Words: 4.6K

Due to the Adderall shortage I didn't have much of my medication, which was not great. I was supposed to get a refill a couple of days ago, but I wasn't able to yet. It could be a few days, weeks or months until I got more. Given what's been on the news, it was something I had anticipated so I had a few days worth for when I really needed it. I had a doctors appointment next week to try figure out a different medication, but I was almost tempted to just not do it. When I first got medication for my ADHD it was a long process of dose adjustments, and dealing with side effects. It was mentally and physically draining. It was something I didn't really want to go through again. The headaches and sleepless nights when I didn't take it were bad enough. Though I didn't know how I would cope long term without it. 

We had just started another month long camp which made this whole thing just a bit more difficult. Ally wasn't with me and I wasn't sure if or when she would be able to visit. For now I was trying to distract myself. I had spent hours so far scouring the internet and going from jeweler to jeweler with Ali trying to find the perfect ring for Ally. None of them were good enough or matched who Ally was. She didn't like fancy rings with big stones or really any stones. She preferred more plain, flush bands with maybe a tiny stone. Ally deserved more than a plain band though. I just had to find the perfect one. 

For the third or maybe fourth time I had dragged Ali out shopping with me. It had probably been hours and I still hadn't found anything that was right. I was starting to get frustrated when Ali literally dragged me away from the mall to the park across the road. 

"You need to take a break."

"But-"

"No, you're getting frustrated and irritable so we're taking a break."

My eyes started to water as I hid my face in my hands, "I just want to find the ring she deserves Ali."

Ali sat down beside me, pulling me into her side, "I know and we will. It'll just take some time, it's only been a few weeks since you got engaged. Have you looked into custom design rings?"

I had gotten Ally a cheap ring in the mean time, but I hated that she had to wait for a proper one. "I didn't even think of that."

We went back to the hotel after getting lunch. Since Ali mentioned it, I was itching to look into designer rings. I had briefly on my phone, but Ali quickly stopped me so I would actually eat. It was a free day so I locked myself in my room quickly going down the rabbit hole of custom rings. I spent hours comparing different companies and small businesses, calling or emailing them to figure out more around pricing and what type of designs they could do. I ended up finding a small business that could get it done in about 2-3 weeks once the design was decided on. 

The design was the next thing I got lost in. I wanted to get it done as soon as possible so Ally could finally get the ring to go with the proposal. There were a couple of ideas that I was playing around with, but it was hard to choose just one. I don't know how long it had been when my phone rang breaking me out of my fixation. Of course it was a facetime from Ally, her ringtone always brought me back to reality. 

Hey baby

Hi

What's got you so distracted that you didn't even look at me? I miss my beautiful smile

I laughed, quickly glancing at her, involuntary smile stretching across my face,Nothing, sorry

Right, I'll pretend I believe you. Did you eat?

It's not dinner yet

Baby, it's 9pm where you are.

No it's no- Oh shit, I got distracted

Ally giggled, the sound making my heart skip a beat. I wished she was here. I figured, Ali is going to bring you something since I know you won't leave whatever it is you're doing.

Thank you Al. Can I ask you something?

Anything

If you had to pick one thing from our relationship, date, holiday, whatever really, what's your favourite thing?

That's a hard one. Do you remember our snowboarding trip?

Our first trip together was a snow boarding trip. We hadn't been together very long and we ended up getting snowed in with no power for 2 nights. All we could do was read, cuddle, play board games, talk and try to keep the fire going. Ally and I had connected from the start, but that trip was a sort of turning point in our relationship. We got to know each other on a deeper level, telling each other all the intimate and deep parts of ourselves. That was when I told her about my adhd, my family, how they acted and how I felt growing up. 

It was the first time I ever cried in front of her. There had been a sense of shame wash over me. I wasn't one to cry in front of people, it had been ingrained in me since I was young. Ally had just held me tightly, whispering reassurances then making me laugh harder then I had in a long time. She had never judged me about anything. Sure, occasionally she would tell me I was being stupid, but she always had my back.

Where's that head of yours baby?

Sorry, I was just thinking back to that trip. It was a disaster, but I loved that trip.

Me too. I think that's my favourite

There was a knock on the door before I could reply. My stomach growled when I saw the food Ali was holding. I hadn't realised how hungry I actually was. In all honesty, I probably wouldn't have eaten if Ali hadn't shown up with food,  "Thank you Ali."

"You're welcome. I'm just glad someone could get through to you. We've all been texting and calling you, even knocked on the door. We figured you were asleep or completely zoned out."

"You got Ally to call me?"

"She was already going to. I just asked if she had heard from you. I didn't want to wake you up if you were asleep, I know the last couple of days have been hard."

"I appreciate that. I got stuck into that thing we were talking about. I'll show you later."

Ally and I continued to talk while I kept working on the design and she started to fall asleep. I stayed on the phone with her even after she fell asleep. We had always slept on facetime together when we were apart. It made us feel closer when we couldn't be. 

By time 4am rolled around I had finally finished the design idea. I had done a rough sketch, but also described my idea so the person could adjust if needed to what they could do. My design idea was mountains that wrapped around the entire band. A textured sky to resemble a snowy day with a small set diamond to look like the moon and hopefully someway to make the mountains look like it was covered in snow. I didn't know if it was completely possible, but even something remotely like that would be okay. I quickly sent it off before I could overthink and change my mind. I was very glad that we had another day off tomorrow. 

---

"Ally!" I ran, jumping in her arms and hugging her tightly. "What are you doing here?"

"Thought I would surprise you again."

"Not that I don't love that you're here, but aren't you busy at work?"

"I am, but I can work remotely now."

"You can? Wait, you got the promotion?" Ally nodded, huge smile on her face as I picked her up and spun her around, kissing her hard. "Oh my god, this is amazing. You are amazing. I am so fucking proud of you Ally."

The girls wandered into the lobby, greeting Ally with quick hugs, "Guys! Ally got the promotion!"

Some of the girls practically jumped on Ally telling her how proud they were. They had even dragged her out for dinner that night saying that we had to celebrate her achievement. Some even going as far as doing speeches. I loved how much they adored Ally, how they had welcomed her into the team without hesitation. 

We were lying in bed that night, wrapped up in each other. I brushed a piece of hair out of her face before kissing her softly, "I really am so proud of you Ally. You're amazing. You've worked so hard for this, you deserve this."

"Thank you Y/n. I couldn't have done it without your love and constant support even if my job bores you."

"Yeah well, for you I will go through all the boring shit in life a million times over." I kissed her softly before sighing, "I'm sorry Al."

Ally's forehead creased as her eyebrows drew together, "What are you apologising for?"

"I'm sorry that it's been weeks since I proposed and I haven't gotten you a proper ring yet. You deserve the perfect ring and I'm sorry you don't have it yet."

She smiled softly, cupping my cheek and making me look at her, "Do you remember what I said when you asked me to marry you?" I shook my head. All I remembered was her saying yes and being very excited. "I told you that I don't care about a ring and I meant it. If this was the only ring you got me, I wouldn't care. All I care about is being with you okay?"

"I love you Ally so fucking much. I just- Your ring is on the way, I just don't know when it'll get here."

"It's okay, I already know I'll love it."

---

Arms wrapped around me from behind, kisses being placed along my jaw. I turned my head, connecting our lips in a long kiss as I pulled her round to my lap. Ally squealed against my lips, giving me the opportunity to slip my tongue into her mouth. A breathy moan slipped from Ally as our tongues met. After a couple of seconds, Ally's fingers dug into my shirt as she pushed me away, "We're in the meal room."

"That can be changed besides no one else is here."

"I have a meeting in half an hour so stop being a horndog and show me what had you so focused."

"You can't blame me, you know what your work clothes do to me." 

I had been looking at different wedding themes on Pinterest, but I was struggling to find ones that might actually suit Ally and I. We were very simple people, we didn't need anything fancy to be happy. We weren't traditional either. It was something we used to make jokes about, how we would go the complete opposite way, have some random colour instead of white, casual clothes and a barbeque. Just one big party. I didn't know what we were actually going to do. When we talked about it, it was just an idea, far off in the future. Now it was a reality and I was so excited to marry Ally. I knew we actually had to talk about when we wanted to do it, but I couldn't wait to marry her. 

I turned my computer so Ally could see, "Anyway, I'm looking at wedding ideas. We should talk about when we want to do it, soon, sooner, soonish, far away, somewhere in the middle. I mean, I'm really fucking excited to marry you, but if you wan-"

"Okay baby, take a breath. You just named three times that are pretty much the same and aren't actually times."

"Sorry, I'm just excited. You know I never thought I would want to get married, let alone be this excited about it."

Ally wrapped her arms around me, kissing my temple, "I know Y/n/n. Don't apologise for being excited, I never meant to make it sound like a bad thing. Trust me, I can't wait to marry you and I love that you are excited to marry me, I would be kind of mad if you weren't."

I giggled, nuzzling my nose against her neck, "So what do you think?"

"Well, I think the sooner the better."

"Exactly what I was thinking. The more I look, the more I'm convinced on a court house wedding. It's such a process."

"A court house wedding would be a lot easier."

"No! you can't have a court house wedding," Kelley yelled making us jump and me glare at her. 

---

Today was the worst day yet without my meds. I was exhausted, my head hurt, I was irritable beyond belief, every little sound or touch felt a hundred times worse and I couldn't focus on anything. There had been a very small handful of times in our relationship that I couldn't handle Ally's touch, this was one of those times. It always made me feel like shit, guilty that my own girlfriend couldn't even touch me. That didn't help me feel any better. Ally was always so understanding about it all, reassuring me that it was okay and dealing with my over touching afterwards to make up for it. Today was no different, Ally had been amazing, giving me space, reassuring me.

Ally had brought me lunch so I wouldn't have to be around the team. We were sitting on the floor in silence after eating. Normally, just being near Ally would help but everything was starting to get too overwhelming. I felt like I was about to explode, like any second I would break. And I did. I didn't mean for it to happen, things just boiled over. Ally suggested we go for a walk, she knew it would help, so did I but I couldn't bring myself to leave the room. I ended up snapping at her.

"Come on Y/n/n, you know it'll help."

"Just give it a rest! I don't need you pestering me, I'm not a child, I'm an adult, I can handle this myself. Just back off."

Ally just looked at me for a second before getting up and walking out. I buried my hands in my hair, pulling slightly. Maybe it wasn't the most healthy thing, but it helped ground me. Well normally it would. It helped enough to snap me out of it and realised I fucked up, "Fuck."

Tears fell before I could stop them as I curled up in a ball and cried. I had never snapped at Ally like that before. Sure we had fights occasionally, but there was never yelling. I cried and sobbed, letting everything from the last week or so out. Being off my meds was exhausting, physically but mostly mentally. My mind was almost constantly a mess. It took me back to how I felt growing up. Like I was annoying, a burden, stupid. That the people around me only put up with me because they had to. Ally included. 

Once the tears finally stopped, I just lay there staring at the celling. It's like I was stuck there, I knew I had to go find Ally, but I couldn't move. The door opened then I felt someone sit down next to me. I knew it wasn't Ally, she always wore a perfume that I would recoganise instantly. 

"What's going on Y/n/n?" Christens soft voice filled the silence.

"It's too much. I-I don't know if I can handle this. I'm just a burden to everyone around me. I fucked up, Ally hates me. It's just too much Chris."

"Y/n Y/l/n you are not a burden. I know things are hard without your medication, but that does not mean you are a burden. We love you, we are here for you okay? I know it's hard, I know it feels overwhelming, but we've got you. We've always got you Y/n. Ally could never hate you, she loves you. Did something happen with her?"

"I fucked up. I snapped at her when she was just trying to help. I've never done anything like that before. I fucked up Chris," My voice cracked, tears somehow welling up again. 

Christen pulled me into her. I didn't fight it, instead gripping her shirt tightly as sobbed wracked through me again. She rubbed my back, whispering quiet reassurances. Eventually Christen moved, being replaced by someone else who held me tight, hand slipping under my shirt and drawing patterns along my skin. Perfume overtook my senses, that sweet perfume I knew so well. I sobbed harder, gripping her shirt as if my life depended on it. In a way it did. I couldn't imagine my life without Ally in it. She understood me in a way no one else did, she knew how to calm me down, how to support me, how to make me laugh. Most importantly she loved me despite my flaws. 

"I'm sorry Ally, I'm so sorry. Please forgive me, I'm so-"

"Shhh, it's okay, I've got you baby, I've got you."

It took a while, but eventually the tears stopped. I sat up, moving away from Ally to sit against the bed. I felt myself go numb. Over the years, it had become my way to protect my self when things, especially emotions got too much. It hadn't happened in a while. Things were never too much when Ally was around, it was manageable. Right now I didn't know where we stood and I was scared.  

I felt two warm hands cup my cheeks and soft lips press against my forehead, "Don't do that. Don't blank out on me. Come back to me."

"W-what are you doing here?"

"Chris texted, she was worried about you, said you needed me."

"You came even after I said what I did."

Ally laced her fingers with mine, "Of course I did. While I didn't appreciate what happened, I know you didn't mean it. Besides, you needed me. I will always be there for you when you need me."

"I'm sorry for snapping at you, I was just so overwhelmed. I don't know if I can do this Al. It's just so much."

She pulled me up, wrapping me tightly in her arms then guiding me so we were cuddled in bed, "I know it's hard baby, I know it's frustrating, but we've got this. I'm right here by your side every step of the way, I'm not going anywhere."

"We're okay?"

"We're okay baby. You owe me a massage though, when you're feeling better to make up for this."

I chuckled, cuddling into her side, my eyes getting heavy, "Deal. I love you Al."

"I love you Y/n. Try and get some sleep. I'm finished work for the day. Chris is going to bring dinner for us a bit later."

---

The ring had just arrived at the hotel and I was scared to open it. I ran straight up to Ali, pulling her away much to the confusion of Ally and everyone else. I shoved the package at her, making her stumble back a bit.

"Calm down a bit Y/n/n. What is it?"

"The ring. Can you open it? I'm kinda scared."

Ali carefully opened the package then the box. I was way more nervous than I expected to be. I had spent so long trying to find the perfect ring, I guess I was worried this wouldn't be it, that it wasn't anything close to what I was hoping for.

"This is beautiful Y/n. It's perfect."

I slowly took the box from Ali, freezing when I saw it. It was exactly what I had envisioned. Seeing the ring felt like a weight had been lifted. After spending so much time searching, I finally had the ring Ally deserved. Thoughts of her not liking it tried to creep in, but I managed to push them away. I knew Ally would like it. "It's exactly what I wanted. It came out way better than I expected."

"So are you just going to give it to her? Or do another proposal?"

"I'm not sure. I was kind of thinking about proposing again just for the fun of it. The original proposal wasn't that special."

"I think you'll find to Ally it was. Even if it wasn't extravagant, it was just the two of you. Personal and intimate." 

"Probably. Let's be honest, I just want to spoil her. Can you hold onto this for me? I'm terrified of losing it."

Ali wrapped her arm around me, trying not to laugh, "Of course I will. Let me know if you need help planning it. Let's get back before they start to question it."

Ally was going to say yes. Knowing that let the excitement bubble up instead of the nerves. I was incredibly excited to propose to her, the plan was already coming together in my mind. I didn't want to wait, all going well it was going to happen tonight. 

Once we got back, I beelined to Ally, "I have two questions. First, will you go on a date with me tonight? Second, do you want to go make out?"

"Yes and definitely yes."

---

Since we started dating, picnics were a big part of our relationship. We both had jobs that meant we dealt with a lot of people. Picnics were the way we escaped reality and people without being inside or around our flat mates at the time. I figured there was no better place to propose then on a picnic. 

Because our date was last minute and we had practice today, I hadn't had enough time to set up the picnic. Ali had agreed to set up the picnic while I took Ally bowling. She loved bowling and it gave time to set everything up. Ally had won by a lot which was not a surprise, I sucked at bowling. Of course she had gloated about it, but with the proud smile she wore, I couldn't even be annoyed. 

Before we left, I had texted Ali to make sure everything was set up so we didn't get there too early. I was driving when the reply came in. Ally went to check like normal, but I quickly stopped her, much to her confusion. 

"You can't check that one, it'll ruin the surprise." I pulled over checking the message, making sure to hide it from Ally. Thankfully she didn't question it. 

Ali: Food took longer then planned, just picked it up, need 10 minutes to finish everything. Also found the perfect place to film it.

Ally was wearing a grey sweater, white blouse underneath with the collar showing and black jeans. I don't know what it was, but I found her incredibly attractive when she wore stuff like that. It was mostly for work which is why I got kicked out when she was working. I couldn't keep my hands to myself. "So we need to kill 10 minutes. You look incredibly beautiful so lets make out." 

"Yeah okay."

Ali had set up a blanket on the beach with candles, rose petals and a small speaker for music. Instead of doing the classic picnic foods, I got Ali to pick up some Thai food because it was Ally's favourite and another one of our traditions. 

I watched Ally's eyes light up as we approached the picnic, "Baby, this is beautiful. How did you set this up?"

"I may have gotten Ali to help set it up. You like it?"

"You don't even have to ask, I love everything you do. This is perfect baby. Is that Thai? I'm starving."

I had planned to do the proposal first for 3 reasons. I was terrified of losing the ring, it was likely I would get more nervous as time went on and Ali was waiting to film it. "It is, you need to wait a minute before we eat."

I found the ring before taking Ally's hand, "Growing up I never thought I would find someone who loved me so unconditionally, who loved me as I was. Who would stick by me and support me through everything. But I did. I found you and I never want to lose you. I want you, no I need you by my side for the rest of my life. I love you Ally, more than you will ever know. I know you've already said yes, but I wanted to do this properly." I sunk down on one knee, opening the box, "Will you marry me Ally?"

"Yes, a million times yes." I easily slipped the ring onto her finger watching her eyes widen as she looked at the ring closer. "Holy shit Y/n, this is amazing. Where did you find it?"

"I designed it. It's based on the snowboarding trip."

"Just when I thought I couldn't love you more, you prove me wrong. You are amazing baby. Words can't describe how much I love this. I want this to be my wedding ring as well. It's too perfect to just be an engagement ring. Is that allowed?"

"We can do whatever we want. Ali filmed that by the way, I wanted it for our memories." 

---

Ally and I were looking at wedding ideas together for the first time. At first I was slightly worried that we weren't going to be on the same page, that it might cause fights. I had seen it happen to couples before. I quickly realised that it was a pointless worry, we were on the same page about everything so far. We wanted simple, non-traditional. 

We had started looking at things we would need for the wedding, such as the venue and catering. Everything we had looked at so far was expensive, which I guess wasn't that much of a surprise, everyone always says weddings are expensive. 

I sighed, pushing the laptop away and turning to Ally, "Why are weddings so expensive? Like I know we can afford it, but it just seems like a waste."

"I know, it's just one day, we could use that money towards our honeymoon or a house."

I straddled Ally, hiding my face against her shoulder. As much as I loved planning things, without my meds, even that was slightly overwhelming after a bit of time. There were so many options and things to consider, "We could do a backyard wedding. Ali and Ash might let us use their place if we asked nice enough."

"Of course we would." I jumped, turning around to find them both standing there. 

"I swear the word wedding is like a magnet for all of you. Every time it's mentioned, someone shows up."

"Well you guys keep talking about it in places where there's a high likely hood of someone being around. Anyway, we would love to have your wedding at our place if that's what you wanted."

Reluctantly, I climbed off Ally, moving to stand by Ali and Ash, "You would really do that for us?"

Ali smiled softly, pulling me in for a hug, "Of course we will kiddo. You're family. You're family too Ally."

I noticed Ally trying to hide her smile. No matter how much they showed they loved her or treated her like part of the team, I still got the same warm, almost ecstatic feeling. To me the team was family. The fact that they saw Ally as family was really important to me. "We're not planning anything over the top or even overly traditional, just simple with friends and family."

"Are your parents going to be there?" Ashlyn tried to hide the annoyance in her voice when mentioning my parents, but it didn't work. I wasn't surprised by it, when they found out what it was like for me growing up, they were pissed. 

I had opened up to them about a lot of things, especially Ali, but besides vague information about how they treated me, my parents never really came up. "No, I um cut them off about 3 years ago. They were just destroying my mental health. Ally's parents will be there though, they pretty much took me in."

"They like you more than me sometimes."

"Well we can't wait to meet them."

#uswnt x reader #uswnt imagines #uswnt imagine #woso x reader #woso imagines

[canirove]

Kylian Mbappé Imagine | three

Little summary: This Wattpad request asked for something with Kylian where you've had an argument, and you accidentally hurt yourself after. But it isn't a serious injury, anyone can read it. Hope you like it and thank you for reading! ☺️💜

Masterlist

"No."

"But..."

"I said no."

"What if I find an acoustic version? That would be nice, right?"

"Kylian, what part of I'm not walking down the aisle to "Despacito" did you not understand?"

"But it is our song! The one that was playing when we first kissed!"

"It isn't our song."

"That One Direction one you like isn't it either."

"It is better."

"It is boring."

"That's what you say."

"Yeah, and everything I say is wrong" he scoffs, rolling his eyes. "You haven't liked any of the things I've suggested for the wedding, you know? Nothing."

"That's because all your ideas are tacky."

"They aren't."

"They are, Kylian. They are."

"Then maybe we shouldn't get married. It's like you don't want to, always saying no to everything" he shrugs.

"What? Of course I want to marry you!"

"Then let me do something!"

"I'm letting you!"

"No, you're not! You are doing it all. You even chose my suit!"

"Because you wanted to wear a white one, and that's tacky as hell!"

"It wasn't tacky. It was really cool."

"I beg to differ."

"Whatever" he says, parking the car.

"Yeah, whatever" I reply, opening the door and getting out.

"What about having one of those photocall things where people pose with emojis and things like that?" Kylian asks as we walk towards the house.

"Those are ridiculous."

"See? Another thing I suggest that you don't like!"

"I'm sorry, ok?" I say, turning around to look at him. Though I do it way too fast, and I trip with the step at our door.

"Careful!" he says, trying to catch me. But he is too slow, and I end up falling. "Are you ok?"

"No!"

"Are you crying or laughing?" he asks while kneeling next to me.

"Both."

"What?" Kylian chuckles.

"I'm pretty sure I fell like they do in movies, I must have looked ridiculous."

"Nah..."

"And I think I've broken my butt."

"Wait what?" he says, going from trying to not laugh to looking worried.

"It hurts."

"Come, let's go inside" he says, helping me get up.

Once inside the house, Kylian moves all the cushions to one sofa, making me lay facing down on them.

"Comfortable?"

"Yeah. Thank you."

"You're welcome. Now let's see if you've broken that pretty bum of yours" he says, lifting my sweatshirt.

"Careful" I hiss when he touches my low back. "How does it look?"

"You are already brushing. I'm gonna call Pierre."

"Pierre? Why?"

"He's a doctor, isn't he? I'm sure he can come and check you, he should be home by now."

"He's a physio, Kylian."

"Even better" he smiles.

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━

"It's just a big contusion. You'll be sore for a couple of days, but you should be fine."

"Thank you, Pierre."

"Yeah, thank you" Kylian says. "Let me walk you out."

"There's no need, I know my way out. Just take care, ok?" he says to me.

"I will" I smile.

"Well..." Kylian says once Pierre has left, sitting next to me. "Looks like we'll have to take a break from all the wedding planning for a while and play doctors instead."

"It'll probably be for the best. I'm sorry, tho."

"About what? Being clumsy?" he says with a teasing smile while fluffing a pillow so I can sit up.

"Ha ha" I reply, rolling my eyes. "I'm sorry about the way I've been treating you. I hate arguing about stupid things like the shape of a table or if we want red or white roses."

"It's ok, don't worry" he says, putting an arm around my shoulders.

"This is supposed to be a day to celebrate our love, isn't it? Why does it have to be so complicated? Why can't it be like the day we got engaged? It was so simple, just you and I looking at the sunset from the pool in that Italian villa..." I sigh.

"Maybe it can be that simple."

"What do you... Ouch" I complain as I move to look at him. "What do you mean?"

"Let's elope."

"Elope?"

"Yeah. Let's go back to the villa. We can call the priest from the town nearby, and get married next to the pool while the sun sets."

"That sounds... That actually sounds perfect. But won't we be needing some witnesses or something so it is legal?"

"We can ask our families to come with us and spend a weekend there, eating and celebrating what truly matters."

"Which is?"

"Us. Our love" he says, caressing my cheek.

"Let's do it, then. Let's elope" I smile.

"You sure?"

"100%. But first I need to recover from almost breaking my butt."

"Ok" Kylian laughs. "I love you."

"I love... Ouch" I complain again as I move to kiss him.

"Careful" he chuckles.

"I love you too" I say, finally finding a comfortable position and kissing him.

#kylian mbappe #kylian mbappe x reader #kylian mbappe imagine #football imagine #football fanfic

[solosikoasgf]

nothing like loving you, chapter one

previous chapters: prologue pairing: solo sikoa x oc (nariah 'riah' perry) themes in this chapter: tense family dynamics (bloodline), initial magnetism + unspoken chemistry word count: roughly 2.4k author's notes: besitos on all the love for the prologue! taglist: @rez-luvs-hook — @southerngirl41 — @harmshake — @christinabae — @dreamsinfocus — @thesamoanqueen — @thewarlordsworld — let me know if you want to be added! song recommendations: heavy by tank and the bangas,

— riah ,

news of the draft flows through the corporate office, and the office is abuzz as our section starts rearranging content schedules to accommodate the changes. rumors buzz through myself and leah, my coworker and other content associate. we met when we both started as wide eyed interns, and we both cried and got terribly drunk when we got hired full time, and spent countless nights up together when we got paired to handle content for nxt. our first year together was spent all over the country, bunking in rooms together, downing red bulls, and making friends with the budding talent. even though it was technically off limits - we saw these people every day, every event. it was impossible to not make some friends.

"i'm so excited for indi," leah mentions, leaning back in her chair to scoot over into my cubicle space. "she's gonna be crazy good on main roster."

"oh yeah. i talked to her a couple days afterwards, she's so excited. the women's division is really ramping up to be something special. indi, alba and isla joining is going to take it over the top, really." i click through a couple press articles, switching to twitter to get a read on how fans are responding to it all. "do you think with the shakeup, we could be changing divisions too?"

with draft changeups came staff change ups - people moved divisions, got promoted, and the like. i honestly liked being at nxt - it wasn't has high as pressure and roadtripping with my work bestie made it even more of a party than work.

leah's eyebrows knit together, and she scooted in closer, leaning her elbows into my desk. "we're the newest, so i would hope not....you don't think dan would try and break us up, do you?" she pouts slightly, running hand through her bright ginger hair. i smile, leaning my head into hers.

"and split up his best content tag team?" i roll my eyes, brushing off her worries - just in time for our manager dan to walk up to my desk.

"nariah, i know our one to one is later, but you okay with it happening right now?" he questions, flashing a smile at leah and i. i nod, picking up my laptop and giving leah a shrug before following. dan was cool - i worked under him as an intern and he got promoted to manager when i got hired. he didn't ride me too hard and always tried to look out for our best interests.

i take a seat opposite him in meeting room we snagged, watching as he settled in, a wide white smile that contrasted with the smooth brown of his skin tone. he leans into the table, like a kid with a secret he can't keep.

"you're getting promoted."

"i'm sorry, excuse me, but what?"

"molly and i have been really impressed with your work. the metrics and engagement on the content you've personally been in charge of has been some of the best posts we've gotten across all our socials. and a lot of the nxt talent has praise for you - especially when you've handled their personal brand posts and not just the ones for general nxt. so we think you can take on some bigger talent. we're promoting you from junior content associate to content coordinator, and we're changing your division." his smile grows even wider with every sentence, and i can't form a sentence.

i didn't think this was going to happen - shit, i thought i would be with nxt for the next one or two years before anything happened. all the content i did was work, but i had fun editing, or brainstorming new ideas. and it was fun to interact with fans and see what they responded best to, to figure out what should be signature for talent.

"too shocked to talk?"

i laugh, shaking my head. "i just did not expect this by a long shot. thanks, dan, really. you really have been my mentor this entire time and i really appreciate you."

"no, nariah. this is all you. i gave you the tools, you went above and beyond with them. that's what we look for."

my smile won't go down, and my cheeks hurt, but i can't stop - until my mind brings leah to the front and it falls slightly. "what about leah?"

"you know i can't talk to you about her, but i am splitting you both up. she's doing good too, but she'll be going to a different division. y'all are both rising up the ranks."

i let out a breath of relief, but a little saddened i'll be away from my partner. "what division am i going to?"

"main roster, men's division. in particular...." he leans back in his chair, with a wider smile. "you'll be assisting in the content for the bloodline specifically."

holy shit?

"excuse my language, but you're shitting me right now. you're putting me on bloodline content?"

"yeah. we think your ideas could be really good in helping where the story is going next. and we've gotten word they want to start pushing solo a little more, and since you worked with him a little in nxt, we think you'd be great to take point on that when the time comes. we actually want you to head down to pensacola to meet with them and start shadowing, since the next two weeks of matches will be down there. you'll be working under tyrese. so after you wrap it up today, head down tomorrow."

i study his face to see if he's serious, but the smile remains, and dan doesn't tend to play games when it comes to work. i leave the conference room a lost for words, replaying the conversation in my head on repeat until i can grasp the full understanding. when leah and i leave later, both shocked with the days events, i hug her a little tighter, and we both look at each other in wonder: things are really changing for us.

________________________

a roadtrip and several phone calls later - including a long one with leah as we bounced around ideas of what we could do for our respective assignments - find me falling in step behind tyrese, who takes point on bloodline content, with some others personally picked by the talent to handle personal brand posts. we hadn't really spent much time together, but word around that he was a good guy, just harsh on deadlines and the kinds of edits that went out. but considering the kind of press that surrounded the bloodline, it made sense, but i'd be lying if i said it didn't put me on edge a little.

"so the guys tend to drift between gyms - josh, jon and sefa all have multiple gym memberships so they go wherever. joe has a spot where his trainer is that he prefers so it'll be rare you really see him like that." he turns to walk backwards, keeping his eyes trained on me. i squirm internally, trying to keep a neutral but interested face. since i had shown up, i had felt a little under scrutiny, and it took me far too long to even pick an outfit, settling on my usual streetwear casual - slightly baggy cargos, a slightly oversized tee, nikes. spent half the morning fighting with my curly bundles to make this slick back low ponytail full. i wanted to feel like myself, but wanted to look approachable. my hands still smooth over my tee, still feeling slight scrutiny from tyrese's eyes as he goes over some scheduling details.

as we round the corner into the training room, i take a deep breath, hearing booming laughter, and try to put on a smile to calm my shaking nerves. we come upon the twins and solo, all engaged in conversation until they see tyrese, who they great with enthusiasm, like a long lost brother. "aye guys, this is nariah, i told y'all she'd be joining us as apart of content."

i smile, swallowing down nerves as both usos take turns shaking my hand.

"damn, new content? i got high expectations since our boy been holding us down." jimmy grins.

"i'll try my best, but i think my work speaks for itself. i think we can add some fun stuff as well as some really edgy things for y'all. as long as your open to it."

my eyes drift to solo, who's held his spot quietly without moving since i came in. his hoodie is just pulled back enough so a peek of blonde shoots through, and his sleeves are rolled up, revealing tatted forearms. he doesn't give a smile, a nod, a word, not a single bit of acknowledgement at my presence. even now, he stares at me with intensity that doesn't come off as friendly, and i'm stuck between feeling awkward and a little offended. truth be told, i hadn't mentioned to anybody how we had met previously, or what had went down.

it wasn't like it was bad, either. it was quick and fleeting, but my neck still felt warm at the thought of our last encounter, only calmed by the thought that he may not remember anything of that night. but then why the hell was he staring at me so hard for?

so i hold his eyes, trying not to let it get to me. "looking forward to working with you guys."

— solo ,

i don't have the time to mess around with whatever new people the office sends down here, seems like one or two cycles through and gets transferred out every couple weeks, not being able to hack it. i'm always more focused on the problems in front of us, and it's always like i'm damn near the only one. as friendly as things seem behind the scenes, there's always an underlying feeling of tension that flows through all of us, even amidst the smiles and camaraderie. when sami left, the rift got a little bigger, and with my brothers losing their titles, it's grown.

if anything, it's left more pressure on me to deliver.

i've never been one for alliances or any of that buddy shit - i've always looked out for myself and made my own path independent of everybody else. i didn't have the elder's support like roman, or have a twin like my brothers. it's always been just me - and that's why i'm solo. but since joining the roster, that feels threatened. i don't know the peace of my own rules and judgement, used as a guard dog of sorts for roman.

and it's not like i mind - the closer i am to roman, the more i have leeway for what i want in the end - but it's almost like i'm a pet, and i ain't never been with that shit.

i like to train when it's late - the quiet of the training facility is easier to navigate. it's just me and tupac, the weights and my own determination. it's what i look forward to - or at least i did, until i find somebody else in there instead. i glance at the clock - one in the morning. the hell is anybody else even doing in here?

there's a low hum of rnb music as the quiet and shadowy figure goes through a series of stretches in front of the mirror. it takes me a moment to place the face as nariah - the content girl from earlier. she doesn't see me and her eyes are closed as she sinks down into the yoga mat, stretching her body over the floor, with audible deep breaths.

i clear my throat and move toward the center, pulling my hood down. it startles her, and she jumps a little, sitting on her knees and her head snapping up. once she recognizes me, she exhales, hand on her chest. "sorry. didn't see you."

"yeah, i can tell."

she doesn't respond, looking at me in the mirror as if she was waiting for words.

"you gon' be in here much longer?"

her eyebrows raise. "maybe. there's enough space for both of us, you know. i won't get in your way."

not the answer i wanted. i shove my hands into the pockets of my hoodie, scowling. "what are you even doing in here this late?"

"the trip down here was long and fucked up my sleeping schedule a little. couldn't get my mind to calm down so i thought i'd get some time in. i should ask you that. weren't you in here training earlier?"

"don't mean i can't train on my own."

"true." she stands, facing me from her spot. "i won't bother you. unless you want to stretch with me before you get started."

i snort, and i swear there's a playful look in her eyes. "what?" she asks, eyebrows raised. "big guy like you can't be flexible?"

"ain't nobody say all that."

"then come on."

i hesitate, but step beside her, looking at her face in the mirror for guidance. she doesn't smile, but her face lights up just a bit, content in my choice as she leads me through stretches. the lights in the training room are still somewhat dim, so i rely on her low voice to guide me along the sounds of the music playing in the background. after a while, my mind empties - no longer concerned with my earlier problems.

i focus on feeling my body connect with my mind, and the tasks that i've done to get me here. i focus on nariah's voice, and then her face as we sit across each other for seated stretches. her voice fades out a little as i find myself more tuned into her face - dark eyes with light circles under them - no doubt from the late nights. full and glossed lips, long and slender limbs. after a while, i realize i'm not moving anymore, and neither is she, and we're both just quietly staring at each other.

something's there.

i don't know what it is, but it's there. pulling me in, making me want a little more. the air feels a little heavier, and her eyes hold mine with quiet intensity for another moment, but something in the back falls with a clatter, and it breaks the tension, and she clears her throat, averting her eyes and scrambling to stand.

"i'm gonna go. you're good, right?" she dusts herself off.

"yeah..." i stand, putting some more space between her.

"alright then i'm gonna..." she mumbles, rolling up the mat and looking for her bag, "i'm gonna go now. see you later, i guess."

"uh-huh."

i watch her disconnect her bluetooth and scramble out the door, and it takes me a moment to come to myself, shaking my head. no time to be distracted.

with everybody on home turf, the next two weeks were going to be brutal. and i needed to focus.

#solo sikoa fanfiction #solo sikoa imagine #solo sikoa x oc #solo sikoa fic #solo sikoa #wwe fanfiction #the bloodline fanfiction #the bloodline wwe #the bloodline x oc #*ssgf #fic : nothing like loving you

[altschmerzes]

Hey! im ace and aro and was wondering if you could talk about what being engaged and getting married means and looks like to you as an aro person? I feel like so few people talk about it that i have no real frame of reference. it’s really cool that you’re happy and living authentically doing all these things and i guess yeah i just wanted to hear more about that if you felt like sharing! have a great day <3

yeah!!! i'm happy to talk abt that!! it's definitely nothing i've seen any kind of like..... broader awareness of, or people talking about, and i probably would've been like. more optimistic about my future if it had been something i'd seen, i think. this got a little long so i'm throwing it under a cut but here it is!! a bit of an explanation of like. How My Engagement/Marriage Works And How That Came To Be. (signed off on by my fiance, for the record - i didn't want to write out an answer to this without checking with them, but they're totally fine with it!)

i think it's probably wildly confusing to some people to see me post and talk abt being aro A Lot (it's one of the most prominent aspects of my online personality i think sdlfjs) including being like. incredibly romance repulsed, and then mention being engaged or having a fiance or referencing 'my wife' (though we're not married yet it is one of my Favourite jokes to make because 1. i think it's very funny, and 2. i just like saying it). people contain multitudes etc etc but i do wonder if people are confused by that sldfjs. my engagement is like... honestly everything i'd ever have hoped for if i'd asked myself at any point in the years since i started identifying as aromantic what my ideal life would include.

i've always had a hard time being alone and i wanted the intimacy and mutual support and just. ability to Do Life with someone that a relationship involved, while also being, as i've said, intensely romance repulsed and not really open to sex either. really just sort of figured that wasn't going to happen for me. the odds of not only meeting an aroace person (the only sort of person i thought might have an interest in the same sort of relationship i wanted and was comfortable with) irl never mind being compatible with them personally and in our priorities just seemed incredibly slim. which like... made me sad sometimes. i'd always sort of daydreamed about getting married which is wild for someone who is as romance repulsed as i am, which i know i keep saying but it really is an incredibly intense feeling for me (i tried dating once in high school and had several panic attacks before breaking it off after our third extremely mild fourteen/fifteen year old date, and often feel physically ill trying to read about fictional romance/watch it on tv). but y'know. sometimes we just don't get what we want in life, and i was fine with the idea of having my friends and my synagogue community and like. hoping my friends wouldn't all leave me behind alone as they all got into relationships.

what ended up happening is obviously not that. i'm really truly unbelievably thrilled every day to wake up and remember what i've got to look forward to every day. my engagement is entirely platonic, and it's exactly what both of us want and are just. beyond happy with and excited for. my fiance is a lesbian, actually, and has been incredibly good and patient with reassuring me that the relationship we have, exactly as it is, is what they want too, that they don't feel like i'm depriving them of anything. we love each other very much, and we're building the life together that we want, in exactly the way that we want.

and that's how it happened, really. we talked about what we wanted. i got engaged at the end of what i've referred to as a 'several hour long conversation' which is the truth sdlkfs. a close friend and i both had sort of 'evaluating the next couple years of our lives and how we wanted pivotal parts of our futures to go' moments about the same time, and it came up i think mostly as a half-serious suggestion that we could get married. for logistical reasons, it made sense for us. and then we started talking about what that might look like - what we wanted, from our lives and our futures, and our hypothetical marriage. and the more we talked about it, the more serious it got, the more real it got, and the more we both i think realized we wanted the same thing. the same life, the same way, together.

we talked about a whole lot in that first couple of days. one of the very first things we talked about actually was kids - did we want them? what was important to us about having and raising children (names, religion, etc)? then it was stuff like did we have strong feelings about where we lived. did we want our own rooms in our home, did we want to wear rings (i love my engagement ring. it makes me smile every time i notice it on my hand), what did we want to tell our friends. we had conversations about whether and how we wanted a wedding. what sort of physical intimacy we were comfortable with, what sort we might want (really glad we did that, and that we were honest and open about that - nothing better, it turns out, than Cuddling Your Wife). what sort of affection we were comfortable with around other people.

our relationship, our life, is what we want it to be. exactly what we want it to be. what makes us happy. we've built it from a vast and beautiful array of choices and options, adding the things we want and leaving the things we don't. it's an approach i would highly recommend to everyone, honestly - talking about what you want out of your relationship, what you want to do and how you want to be with someone rather than just picking which of a short list of proscribed 'types of relationship' you want to have. it leaves a lot more room for nuance and what will actually make you happy than much less contextually nuanced things like assuming your definition of 'dating' will match the other person's, or that the kind of relationship you want just isn't possible. setting up that kind of foundation in communication and honesty and being clear about our expectations and needs has fostered a relationship where i feel respected and valued and heard - and i'm reasonably certain (and i hope!) that they feel the same.

we travelled to my birthplace so they could be introduced to my family and my childhood best friend. it's always both surprising and amusing to me every time someone assumes i'm gay (gender is complicated but we both tend to read as women) - this happened a lot there, and as i've told my extended family and other more casual friends about my engagement. this doesn't bother me at all (i'm not out to almost anyone irl as aromantic, and it's a reasonable conclusion to reach given what information they have) but it's extremely funny when i also get to find out which of my family members/people i knew in middle school always sort of wondered if i was gay but never asked sldkjs. turns out the answer is 'a lot'.

re: assumptions, for the most part, we don't bother explaining the nature of our relationship to people. this is also something we talked about! we discussed how much we wanted to clarify or contextualize, and decided that ultimately like... with the exception of people we're very close to, and in contexts like this (fairly anonymous post on ye olde internet with the ability to immediately block anyone who clowns on it), it's really nobody's business unless we decide it is and we're cool with just letting people assume whatever. that does lead to some like... i can't speak for them but it gets a little weird for me sometimes, i'm not gonna lie. it feels a little like getting misgendered, having people assume that i'm in a romantic relationship. i say that as a nonbinary person who's mostly just. chill about not being out about that irl. that's the best descriptor i have to help people understand what might be a hard thing to understand. but it doesn't bug me enough to want to put myself - or my fiance - through what correcting that assumption would involve. i mostly don't blame anyone for it - it's extremely reasonable to assume someone who is engaged is in a romantic relationship with the person they're engaged to - except for when friends who know i'm aromantic and somehow think this means that's... changed, somehow? or jump to assuming i'm in a romantic relationship before considering i might not be in one and still be engaged anyway. so it's kind of weird, and feels a little bad, but not enough to really do anything about it except hope the world changes a bit and stops making assumptions about other people's relationships at some point.

that's really the only downside, hand to gd. that and worrying that there might be consequences, legally, if the wrong person finds out we're married but Not Like That. everything else is honestly amazing. it's the best thing that's ever happened to me and i'm so unbelievably happy. i never thought i'd ever get to be this happy, or have a future this bright and warm and full of love to look forward to. having spent a lot of my life for various reasons thinking i just wouldn't have a future at all, it's like every day is a really incredible dream, except i'm never going to have to wake up.

the moral of the story i guess, if you've made it this far in this novel of an answer, anon, which i wouldn't bet on, because it's so much longer than i planned on it being (SORRY SDLKFJS i guess this is more than just a 'writing fic' problem for me now XD), is that your relationships are what you make them. assuming that what you want isn't possible, or that nobody could possibly want the same thing, is a great way to cheat yourself out of something wonderful. nobody has to have any kind of relationship, obviously, if they don't want one, but i think there are a lot of people - aromantic and not! though i do think this probably impacts aro people. more. - who could benefit from the idea that there are more options out there than just like... 1. romantic relationship constructed in a specific way and following a specific path, and 2. being alone.

#gav gab #aromantic #aro blogging #gav answers #a MUCH LONGER post about my engagement/marriage and life and whatnot than i thought i'd be writing but #here we are. #the truth is i'm just already the world's biggest wife guy and i want to talk about it all day long sldkfjs #'how are you a romance repulsed aromantic engaged' very happily as it turns out! #they also just went home after a visit yesterday (were long distance rn while we’re finishing school) and im a big baby about it #turns out sleeping alone after NOT doing that is. hard and weird.

[bunbeeplays]

The Lemon Legacy: Generation 1, Chapter 69 - Just Desserts

The Hot Girls take a break from fitness and have some brunch at a bar near their gym.

Ophelia's life update isn't the most cheery, but she's glad to have the support of her friends.

Libby: Feefs, I'm so sorry.

Becca: What a creep. Don't worry, guys like that always get what they deserve.

Ophelia: I hope so, but things don't always work out like they do in your books, Becca.

Becca: Don't remind me. Still waiting for Travis to tell me he's a secret prince.

Summer: Hector Laurent… That name sounds familiar. Guess I've heard you talk about him.

Ophelia: Well, I'd like to stop talking about him. He's not going to live rent-free in my mind.

Libby: Good for you, girl! Summer, how was the honeymoon?

Summer: It was perfect. I just wish I had one more vacation day from my doofus coworkers.

Libby: Aww, it can't be that bad!

Summer: My one caterer Mila is really getting on my nerves, considering how many complaints we get about her not actually cooking at her catering gigs.

Summer: Speaking of work, I've gotta head out. I've got a couple meetings at work today, so I'm going in early.

Ophelia gets up to hug her.

Ophelia: Bye, good luck!

Summer: Thanks, girly pop. Let us know if you need anything. Love you!

Summer got promoted to Head Caterer at Make-A-Dish shortly before she got engaged to Mark. She's settled into the role quite nicely. She loves bossing people around!

As she finishes up a call, Mila walks into her office.

Mila: Excuse me, Summer, but a potential client is here to see you.

Summer: I don't have my calendar pulled up. Did they give you a name?

Mila: Hector Laurent.

Summer: HECTOR LAURENT?!

That's why the name rang a bell.

Mila: I-I'm sorry, did I do something wrong?

Summer: For once, no. Send him in. I'm eager to talk to him.

Mila: Yes, ma'am.

Hector comes in, pleasant as ever.

Hector: This is a lovely office Miss…?

Summer: MRS. Eggleston. You must be Hector Laurent. I've heard a lot about you.

Hector: Good things, I hope!

Summer doesn't react to his joke.

Summer: Pull up a chair. Let's chat.

If Hector notices the stink eye Summer is giving him, he doesn't show it.

Hector: I've got a great business opportunity for you.

Summer: Enlighten me.

Hector: I run one of the most successful wedding venues out there and we're looking for a new caterer.

Summer: Fascinating.

Hector: This would be a great source of revenue for your catering team-

Summer: Oh, would it? I suppose technically it would be, since my employees would probably get a lot of money out of your pocket from harassment lawsuits.

Hector: Mrs. Eggleston, I-I don't-

Summer: Don't play dumb with me, Laurent. You thought word wouldn't get out that you tried to force your employee to woohoo you? If you think I'm sending my team into the lion's den, you're as stupid as that hat makes you look.

Hector: I think there's been a misunderstanding-

Summer: No, it's clear as day that you tried to take advantage of a woman you held a position of power over.

Hector: Who told you this? Was it Ophelia? You can't trust a word that harlot says!

Summer: Keep her name out of your damn mouth!

Hector: This is a highly unprofessional way to conduct business.

Summer: Good thing we're not conducting business then. Sounds like when this goes fully public, you won't have any clients for us to cater for anyway!

Hector: I'll gladly take my business elsewhere.

Summer: Good luck after the email I'm going to send out.

Hector: What's that supposed to mean?

Summer: Us caterers might be in competition with each other, but we do talk, you know.

Summer: No one going to send their employees to a known predator. I'm warning every restaurant from here to Sixam that you're not a safe client.

Hector: That's libel! I'll sue!

Summer: There was a witness to your misconduct. Plus, you knocked up an employee. You MADE evidence!

Hector: She didn't work for me at the time! My personal life has nothing to do with my business!

Summer: You sure made inappropriate workplace conduct your business!

Hector: You can't do this to me!

Summer: Blacklist you? Yeah, what kind of monster threatens to do that?

Summer: Now get the hell out of my office! Enjoy your time before you become a total pariah. And next time, think twice before messing with Summer Eggleston's friends, bitch!

Hector doesn't know what to do other than slink out of the office in shame.

Having no idea how much Summer just ruined a huge part of Hector's ability to operate his business, Ophelia has been blissfully working on improving her baking skill for New Skill Day. That better be a thank you pie for Summer, girl!

#The Sims #The Sims 4 #The Sims 4 Legacy #The Lemon Legacy #TS4 #The Sims 4 gameplay #sims 4 #generation 1 #ophelia #summer #becca #libby #hector #mila

[frankcastleonlyfans]

𝐒𝐇𝐎𝐑𝐓𝐂𝐀𝐊𝐄, 𝐋.𝐏

pairing: lee pace x girlfriend!reader

summary: everyone is short compared to lee

words: 699

reblogs, feedbacks and likes are appreciated. i hope you like it!

18+ warning

warnings: none!!

· ┈┈┈┈┈┈ · ୨♡୧ · ┈┈┈┈┈┈ ·

The thing that most people comment about my relationship with Lee is our height difference. Most of the time we don't really care about it, and it doesn't affects us in any way, but, we can't just ignore it. It's there, and it makes it's presence when I'm on tip toes trying to get something from the heightest shelf in kitchen, or when we're on a plane and he doesn't really fit much of the space. Sometimes I call him "big bird" when he is annoying me, and he calls me "shortcake" all the time. Also, when we're walking our dog out people gives us funny looks. And I'm not even that short, I'm 5'4, but everyone is short around my boyfriend's 6'5 tall figure.

It's hella cute to see a big man as Lee, walking a tiny black flat coated retriever on the streets. Even though walking Gus out drives attention, being seen around with me gives people enough to talk about, so we just have been avoiding to get out of the house together. Long enough to people start speculating we broke up. Which is funny, because we just got engaged.

"Gus, go tell your father that dinner is ready," I said to the dog beside me, that went running out of the kitchen.

We're celebrating our "one week engagement", so I made Swedish meatballs with spaghetti for the occasion. I'm not very good at the kitchen, and that's one of the reasons I still ask myself "what have this man seen in me?", but I still try to impress him. Lee on the other hand is a great cooker. I wonder if there's something he can't do.

After I set the table, I poured us some wine and waited for my fiancé while scrolling through my twitter time-line. It's funny to read people's theories about our "possible break-up".

"HI honey, I'm sorry it took me so long," Lee says while walking down the stairs. He comes in my direction and leans down to leave a peck in my lips. "What are you reading?" He points to my phone.

"People are saying you're one of the most eligible bachelors in Hollywood at the moment," I smirked at him and he scoffed rolling his eyes.

"Please, it's only have been four months since we're last seen together. I don't understand how people can jump to that "break-up" conclusion so fast," Lee commented, taking a full fork of spaghetti to his mouth.

"To be fair, you've been only posting pictures of Gus on your insta..." I shrugged.

"It's your fault, shortcake. You say you don't like to exposes us so much," He raised one brow at me.

"Yeah, I don't like to see people saying the same things all the time. It's kinda frustrating having everyone pointing out our height difference in the comments of every single picture of us," I mumbled and he took his hand to meet mine in a supportive way, his thumb caressing the back of my hand.

"I know, I'm sorry baby. You know I would shrink myself for you if I could," Lee said and I snorted, sipping from my glass of wine.

"You're so silly, big bird" I looked at him with a silly smile on my face.

"And yet, you love me madly. I must've been doing something right," He shrugged and I bit my lip.

"I can think a couple things you're doing just right," I murmured under my breath as I sipped from the wine, and I could feel his burning gaze at me, just as well his wicked smirk.

"Oh, really? Mind to list those things for me?" Lee said in his low voice, putting down his cutlery. I finished my glass, feeling a little more naughty because of the alcohol.

"I could spend the rest of the night listining all the great things you do to me, or... we could just go to our room so I can show you in practice," I bit my lip harder as I pressed my thighs together, and I watched his look getting darker in lust.

"Oh shortcake, I'm about to add some more things to your list."

#lee pace x reader #lee pace smut #lee pace fanfiction #lee pace imagines #lee pace

[ohgodmyeyes]

Hello love, I got someone else hooked to disassembly and we both can’t wait for updates to resume when possible ❤️

hey! i'd been meaning to do this for a couple of days, because you've been so unimaginably kind and patient.

i didn't anticipate ever needing such a long break from a creative project; but then, i've also never poured quite this much of myself into that kind of endeavour before. (*not sure whether i'm talking about disassembly by itself, or my anakin stuff in all its entirety, not that it especially matters in-context.)

anyway, because you trusted me enough to recommend it to someone new after watching it go so long without an update, i feel like i owe it to you to show you what i've written for it over the past couple of days. it's unedited, so there might be typos or notes or continuity problems or (most likely) egregious word repetition; despite that, i hope it measures up conceptually to the rest of the story.

i also hope it reassures anyone who's been in doubt that this fic means more to me than ever, and isn't far from being updated. i've loved working on it again, and i hope a few of the people who engaged with it before will enjoy coming back to it too.

i'm not going to shoot myself in the foot by deigning to offer a timeline, but i will say that there are approximately 700 words worth of SPOILERS for Disassembly behind the cut — including the baby's name!

if you would rather wait until the chapter is completed to read it, DO NOT LOOK BEHIND THE CUT.

for any/everyone else... well, i hope i'm off to a good start. (and for god's sake, pls be gentle if i'm not lol.)

...

...

"Liam. Do you like it?"

"Sure. I mean, I don't not like it. But I thought you said you wanted to pick something to make my dad happy, since Leia already used 'Ben'."

"...I thought I did. Didn't he ever tell you about his mom's old fiancé? They were going to get married; he treated your dad like he was his own kid, but he died before the wedding ever happened."

"...Oh. Right. I— I'm sure he must have mentioned him, at least once or twice."

...

Even now, you had no idea whether Luke had been feigning his familiarity with the name you'd chosen for your son. Maybe Anakin had told him; maybe he hadn't: Both possibilities seemed equally likely to you. All you really knew was that Anakin had disclosed the information to you while you'd been sitting on his couch with him, late one evening back at his old house. You'd been drinking that night, just passing a bottle back-and-forth while you watched the news scroll by together— not that you ever planned on revealing to Luke that particular bit of the story.

All Luke needed to know was the name itself, and the barest explanation as to why you'd picked it.

"I barely remember telling you about that," Anakin murmured from his seat next to your hospital bed, glancing up from the tiny bundle in your arms through a few stray strands of his own hair. His eyes were tired, but he looked happy anyway— happier, even, than you'd seen him since that last time he'd smiled at you in the car, after seeing his cardiologist. That hadn't been so long ago; now, though, it felt like another lifetime.

In more than one way, you supposed it sort of was.

Liam squirmed, prompting you to look down at him, too, but he didn't wake up. It had only been (maybe) an hour since he'd been pulled out of you; you'd placed him on your breast as soon as the nurse managing the ward had locked your bed into position and handed him off to you, but he hadn't suckled for very long before falling into what appeared to be a fairly restful sleep.

You hoped you'd fed him correctly: The next time he did wake up, you thought, you would have to ask someone for help.

"We'd both had a lot to drink that night," you said to Anakin, with as quiet a laugh as you could muster. "I'm actually almost surprised I remember— but something about it must have stuck with me."

Anakin chuckled back, but didn't appear to have anything else to say just then— evidently too wrapped up in the baby to give anything else very much of his attention. You recalled what you'd learned from Luke about how he and Leia had come into the world; by the time their dad had seen them with his own eyes, they were already more than a week old: Having been greeted, fed, changed, held, and dressed for days and days by people who weren't him.

Liam, in contrast, had almost certainly seen more of Anakin's face in his first sixty minutes of life than he had of yours— and it was Anakin who'd held him first, and taken photos of him first, too— not to mention given you the most helpful advice you'd received so far concerning diaper changes.

Fortunately for you, not knowing quite how to feel about any of that made it a lot easier to remember to try not to feel too much of anything about it at all.

"Have you heard anything from Luke yet?" you asked Anakin, not necessarily wanting to hear the answer.

"No, but I wouldn't expect him to call me. You should probably check your phone."

It had probably taken you the better part of an hour to shower and dress following your 'encounter' with Luke in the hallway, you thought; after that, you'd spent perhaps fifteen or twenty minutes in transit in the back of the taxi, and then another hour or so being evaluated before your c-section. Then there had been the operation itself, followed by your time in the recovery room, not to mention the time you and Anakin had already spent fawning over Liam—

"...You're right," you admitted, thinking about the way Luke tended to wake up early when he'd been drinking. "I probably should."

Your phone had been wrapped up in the clothes you'd come in wearing, and placed on the table next to the bed: Maybe by Anakin, or maybe by a nurse; you couldn't know. After gently depositing Liam into the bassinet on the opposite side of the bed (lifting your arms to do so precipitated a distinct stabbing sensation in the muscles close to where you'd been cut open, which you expertly ignored), you untangled it from your leggings and lit up the screen.

"Shit," you said— out loud, without meaning to.

"What?" asked Anakin, seeming almost to come out of a trance.

"...Luke thinks something happened to you. I— well, I think he might be on his way here soon." The prospect of Luke showing up at the hospital (maybe even still half-drunk) shouldn't have filled you with dread, but it did. By some miracle, your brain didn't even chastise you for your lack of enthusiasm; maybe, you thought, even it couldn't blame you.

Anakin paused, as if to think. He'd been doing a lot more of that recently, and so it wasn't difficult (for you, anyway) to remember to wait. It wasn't that his brain 'didn't work', as he seemed to have taken to characterizing it; rather, it was that it didn't work as quickly as he or anyone around him was accustomed to it working.

He was still himself, and he could even still act like it, too— just so long as you gave him enough time.

"...How does he know where we are?" he finally asked, all of a sudden making you regret your own patience, at least that time.

"What?" you asked back, this time intending to buy a few seconds for yourself instead.

"How does Luke know we're here, at the hospital? If he'd called, they would have told us."

Great job. Are you going to tell him about the dog tracker you put in his leg, now?

...No. No, fuck you.

"He must have told the computer at home that I lost my phone," you lied.

"Oh," said Anakin, followed by another long and thoughtful pause. "...Are you sure you're okay with that?"

You laughed, and laughed bitterly; you didn't mean to, exactly, but you also supposed that if anyone was liable to understand, it was almost certainly Anakin. "It doesn't matter whether or not I'm okay with it," you told him, stealing a guilty glance in Liam's direction as it occurred to you that you should probably start trying to be a bit more quiet for his sake.

"I think it matters," said Anakin. "If you don't feel like seeing him right now, then—"

"Then I'll see him anyway," you finished decidedly, looking down to offer a poke to your own still-tingling legs because you didn't want to look up at Anakin just then. Something like a cramp seemed to run through one of them; right up into where you'd been cut open, but it didn't hurt so much as it felt foreign: Enough to bother you, but not in a way that was liable to make you say 'ow'. "If I start treating him differently now, it's only going to make things worse for all of us."

"Before tonight I probably would have said the same thing, but—"

"But nothing. Did you forget what we talked about before— when I was still in the shower?"

Anakin shot you a look. "No. No, I didn't 'forget'— actually, I'm starting to think I remember it better than you do; I'm not the one who's been making excuses for him this whole time."

"I'm not 'making excuses'," you said, all of a sudden too tired to bother to mask the hurt in your voice. "I'm trying to hold all of this together long enough to give Liam the kind of life he deserves. He's only a baby; he can't grow up with Luke and I hating each other."

"He doesn't have to." Anakin looked past you, and over at the little hospital bassinet instead. "...I really wasn't joking when I said I thought you should call someone. If you leave now, Luke will—"

"Luke will dump you in the veteran's home, and none of us will ever see each other again," you hissed, cutting him off as sharply and deliberately as you could without shouting at him. "You say you haven't forgotten, but we've been over this more than once, and—"

"And every single time we do 'go over it', it gets worse! I didn't agree to move in because I thought it was a good idea; I did it to make you happy— because you thought we could keep flying under the radar, and I wanted to trust you. We're not anymore, though, whether we like it or not, and Luke—"

"Luke is going to be a great dad! You might not have been able to give him the tools to be a husband, but I know he's going to be a good father; all you have to do is let him try. Anyway, I need him as much as I need you... especially now," you added, with yet another glance in the direction of Liam's tiny, sleeping form.

"You don't need either of us," said Anakin, shaking his head. "You could do it alone, and I think you probably should."

You winced at his bluntness, not that you hadn't expected it. He'd said the same thing about Leia and her boyfriend, after all: Projecting his own fears around intimacy onto the people he cared about; pretending it was hard-earned wisdom instead. You supposed he could very well have been both 'correct' and 'projecting' at the same time, but...

...

...

...

AND THAT'S IT FOR NOW. i was tired last night and whatever else i wrote after that is still gibberish. back to it tonight, though, i hope. i would be lying if i said i didn't feel anxious and rusty, but it's okay to feel that way once in a while.

anyway... 'Liam' is a deliberate reference to Liam Neeson, because of course 'Qui-Gon' doesn't exactly fit into the AU. I wasn't sure whether it was a good idea to shoehorn a brand-new character into anakin's past for the sole purpose of justifying the name, but at the end of the day, it's not the clumsiest thing i've ever done as a writer (even within this story).

there's a chance i might go back and add a scene to an earlier chapter so that it isn't too jarring to new readers, but part of me also thinks it's fine the way it is. they've had lots of time to talk, frankly, and we were never going to hear all of the conversations, were we...?

anyway, i'm obviously not going to tag the ships or let people reblog this... but if you happen to know of someone who might appreciate it, you're more than welcome to link them. hopefully i'll see you again soon.

thank you, @lilahelynora — and everyone/anyone else who's been in any way patient with me recently (i'd tag a few other special people too, but frankly i don't want to bother them). it all means more than you know.

#thank you #disassembly #spoilers #this answers a couple of asks i hope #unedited writing #i kind of hope no one notices this buuuttt

[silvercap]

Do you have any tips for new writers?

Also is there a way to not get too caught up in engagement and stats? I'm kinda having this problem and it is taking the motivation out of things a bit 😭

That's a good question! This post got a little long, so I'm implementing a break lol

I don't exactly have specific rules, but I think my biggest tip for someone writing for the first time is to go easy on yourself and give yourself time to get better. I struggle a lot with perfectionism and the nasty habit of being harder on myself than anyone else ever will be, but it's important to acknowledge that we are our own worst critics and that improvement is only measurable by practicing through the early stuff. I encourage a lot of experimenting, especially when you're starting out--try new things and ways of writing and slowly collect the ones that work for you. I've taken plenty of classes on the logistics of writing and technical tips, but those aren't necessarily helpful for everyone to focus on when they're starting out. I think in first drafts and initial writing, it's better to write from whatever urge possesses you to do so and not get caught up in the technicalities. Those are often more helpful when editing, but it really depends on the way your brain works!

Over time, you'll start to build up a sense of flow and style and the general rhythm of writing engaging paragraphs, which brings me to my next point--reading. It's been said before, but I'll say it again: Reading is one of the best ways to develop a sense of rhythm and effective imagery/idiom/etc. I've also spent plenty of classes analyzing the effectiveness of (I forget the exact word) elements like metaphor or allegory or symbolism or anaphora or any other technical term you can think of that is commonly used to convey specific literary concepts. Reading, on its own, is a great tool for subconsciously noticing the flow of writing and getting a sense for it, but sometimes just taking notice of certain paragraphs that feel right to you or just hit in the right way can allow you to analyze them more deeply and find out what exactly it is about the words that works. Everyone has their own preferences! That might seem daunting, but often the best resources we as writers have is each other, and everyone is inspired by someone else at some point. I'm totally here to take asks and answer any questions I may have brought up because I'm rambling a little bit and like I said: technical aspects aren't necessarily helpful to focus on all at once, and I recommend trying one out at a time to see how it works for you. If that makes sense!

My biggest piece of advice is to have fun with it! Experiment. Put in that weird little thing you think nobody else will like, because often those are the best parts of writing. Do what you feel sounds right! Not to Wayne Gretzky you, but you can only get better or 'succeed' by trying it out and seeing where it takes you. We write because we have ideas we want to share or explore for ourselves, and trying to force yourself to write something you're not passionate about is rarely lucrative.

As for engagement and stats--now, that's a whole other beast. We all want to be noticed and appreciated and commented on, and it's hard sometimes to post a fic and have less engagement than you hoped, but I have a couple things I like to keep in mind for this. It's discouraging, for sure, but people on ao3 or similar sites don't always show their appreciation even if they read and liked your fic. The only way we can fix this as a collective community is to lead by example and comment/kudos/share the fics we read in the hopes that it will catch on and to spread the love to everyone else. I also find it helpful to think about the people who do leave kudos--even if there are only one or two of them--as not just random usernames, but actual living, breathing people who read your fic and enjoyed it. There's that post somewhere about ten likes not seeming like much in the scheme of social media and the influence that virality has had on the internet in recent years, but to have ten people standing in a room with you giving you a thumbs up? That's a lot of people. Even if you get very little engagement, that is not a reflection of you as a person or even necessarily your skill. I know that this can be draining, but the only way to try and build an audience is to post. Sometimes it takes a long time for fics to be noticed. Sometimes things fail. It's up to you how you want to take that, and I can't tell you any of this for certain. I just know from my personal experience that finding a community is only accomplishable by interacting and posting and sharing and existing, and often someone will come along when you don't expect it.

None of this is guaranteed. Hell, take everything I say with a critical eye and more than a few grains of salt, because this is only my experience and god am I still learning. These are things that help me, and I hope some of this is helpful to you, too! What I can tell you for certain is that I encourage you to write and pursue it as far as you want to, and even farther than that. It takes hard work. It can feel like nobody is listening. And ughhhhh the writer's block suuuuuucks. But, you're not alone in this. Anything you've felt is something another writer has felt before, and I think, at least, that there's comfort in knowing you're following in the footsteps of even the writers we consider to be great in both their success and flaws. Maybe I'm being a little lofty ahaha, but it comes down to whether or not you want to write. You can only decide how this goes, and it takes time to work through the barriers of both skill and the anxious fear of not being seen. I see you! And I'm here in the asks anytime you want :)

And even if you fail and give up--you're no less of a writer for it, because you tried, and I think that matters. The lovely thing about being alive and being writers is that we can change and grow, and there will always be a place for you among creators if you choose to join them, no matter how amateur you feel or how long you do it for.

#idk if this answers your question lmao #asks #I could also maybe find more practical resources for physically writing if that's what you were hoping for ahaha

[emometalhead]

Aftershock Day 1 Recap:

Day 1 was incredible!!!!

Let's start at the beginning. The line situation when trying to enter was super weird this year, but an employee let us go into a line we otherwise wouldn't have been able to go into. That line got us in really quickly. Thank you to that man lol.

The first band we saw was Pinkshift! It was my second time seeing them. They brought a lot of energy, and I'm glad I knew more of their songs this time around. My aunt really liked them and wants to check their music out now too! Speaking of my aunt. She won lots of cool points. I made bracelets to give away, and my aunt threw the Pinkshift one on stage. The singer grabbed it, made a heart gesture, and threw one back!! (It's in the pictures below!!) That was one of the best things to happen to me at Aftershock!! I also got a rose that was thrown by the singer!! 🥰

The next artist we saw was Nothing.nowhere. I admittedly had a bit of trouble trying to get into his music while doing my festival prep, but he was really good live!! I had a fun time vibing and headbanging. He was really engaging with the audience, and seemed happy to be there. Plus, he covered One Step Closer by Linkin Park!!! I had no clue he was going to do that. My dad, aunt, and I are humongous LP fans, so we really went hard singing and headbanging.

Next was White Reaper! They were vibey. They were definitely the most chill set of the day. They were nice to watch and relax a little. It was pretty stinking hot already at this point, so I enjoyed the break from jumping and headbanging. They were entertaining, and my aunt knew a few of their songs!

Thousand Below was the first time in the day we saw a solid mosh pit. They were heavy and awesome! I had an equally fun time watching the band as I did watching the pit!! There were a couple kids on their parents shoulders in the mosh pit. They looked like they were having a great time, and it was fun to see. I always worry about kids in crowds, but those kids were very safe and very happy.

We were only able to catch about 20 minutes of Pennywise's set, but I'm grateful for those 20 minutes! They were good!! I really like their music, so I was excited and had decently high expectations. They definitely met my expectations. We sat down to rest a bit during their set, but nonetheless it was still fun!

Next up was Stone Temple Pilots!! This was my third time seeing them, and also probably the best time. I'm a huge huge huge STP fan. I managed to get really close to the stage, and I had a great view the whole time. I also went a little crazy, because they played Big Bang Baby!! It's my favorite song, and they didn't do it last time. I screamed louder than I had all day at that point lol. I was jumping through the whole song. I was separated from my dad, but afterwards he told me he recorded the song for me!!

We got surprisingly close for AFI considering we literally got to the stage as the band was coming on. My aunt has been wanting to see them for years, so this was her moment. It was my second time seeing them. They were as good as I remembered! That crowd wasn't too rowdy or crowded, and the mosh pit when on pretty much the entire time. My aunt went into the mosh pit, and I found out that was her first time!

We only watched some of Incubus' set, because we wanted to get close for Avenged Sevenfold. They were really good though! I hope one day I can catch a full set, since last time I saw them it was also only a partial set. We met up with some of my dad's old work friends at this point. They're super sweet, so it was nice to see them. Both of them kept commenting on how big I am now lol. I think I'm still like 10 in their minds, but that's okay lol. We don't see each other often.

Avenged Sevenfold was incredible, obviously. This was my second time seeing them, but my first time in a festival setting. They had so much energy. M Shadows' voice absolutely delivered, and it is no secret that I think Synyster Gates is a god. There was a pit in front of us that never lost steam through the entire set. I got pushed around a bit, but my aunt and dad made sure I was safe and could enjoy the show. I was able to see the band on stage for most of the set, which was definitely nice. They had cool visuals on the screens though, so it wasn't too bad when I couldn't see the band.

I was able to give out all of my bracelets, and everyone seemed really excited about them!! No one was expecting a bracelet lol. I'm looking forward to handing more out today!! I also met some dude in a band. We were talking for a couple minutes, and he was really nice. After this weekend, I'll have to check out his music. I love meeting local musicians!!

#ashley overshares #aftershock 2023

[tickle-tickle-me-wiggly]

guys i know that break was short as fuck but heres a whole lotta explanation

ok so heres why !

me and evan got engaged a couple days ago (and i know what you're thinking, "congrats" or what fucking ever)

but

you know when couples fight over stupid shit? yeah that was happening, but he was being a royal DICK and just, you know, disrespectful. he also called me numerous names that hurt my feelings a lot. (i was bullied as a kid, so it really shook me up.) he's been like this the last couple little quarrels we had, but it wasn't that serious. I thought we would get over it soon, but obviously not because, yeah.

i called it off.

but you know, i'm good now.

i feel a lot better, since i've been wanting to do this for the past day or two.

anyway, don't worry about me or anything, i just wanted to get this off my chest, since i had basically nobody to dump this on. so i thought i would post it publicly for everyone to see!

he is a good person, don't get me wrong. it's just we weren't meant to be or whatever. don't hate on him or anything, i wasn't completely right doing this.

i just needed a break from everything for a bit.

i hope you all understand 💕

#is this yapping? #i dont fucking know #but i'm real happy that we could both move on with our lives

[winx-is-magic]

Ideas for the Winx reboot I'll never write because I'm lazy part 2

Bloom will not achieve Enchantix until "Secret of the lost kingdom"

It bothers me how Bloom earned Enchantix just because she wanted to, while the others have risked their life. It's not fair that she gets the special treatment only for being the protagonist, so in my rewrite she will earn it only by saving her planet in "Secret of the lost kingdom".

Since she will not be an Enchantix fairy during season 3, this means that she cannot use her fairy dust to defeat Valtor. Instead, she'll use a much more complicated spell that she learned on Pyros.

Tecna will earn Enchantix by saving someone from Zenith

As I mentioned in my previous post, it doesn't make sense that she earns it by closing the Omega portal. Altough this is a great sacrifice, it doesn't met the requirement for achieving Enchantix. For this reason, in my version she will earn it by saving Timmy, who comes from Zenith. She will still sacrifice herself to close the Omega portal, but it will not be how she becomes an Enchantix.

Stella will get over her parents' divorce

I think the original screenwriters should have done that by season 3, but who cares, right? Let her carry this trauma forever, I'm sure she doesn't need to talk about this to her parents in order to heal 🙄

In "At the last moment" (season 3, episode 19), after she breaks the spell that Cassandra has put on her father, Stella tells him that, at her Princess Ball, she hoped the surprise he talked to her about was the reconciliation between him and her mother, and was shocked to learn that he and Cassandra had gotten engaged. She also tells him that she suffered a lot when him and her mother got divorced. His father replies that they were no longer happy together, and thought it was best for everyone if they ended their marriage, so that Stella could live in a better environment and were no longer forced to witness their fights. She is surprised to learn that her parents divorce was mainly to preserve her well-being, while, from her perspective, it made things worse. King Radius tells her that both him and her mother love her and that all they have done was to make her happy. Stella understands she was wrong to think that her parents were being selfish and didn't consider her feelings when they broke up, and feels better now.

Some couples will not exist / will not appear until later seasons

I think it's unrealistic that, in a friend group made of six girls, all of them have a boyfriend. I understand if we are talking about a smaller group (and by small I mean something like three people), but a group of six? That's strange (although not impossible).

As for the couples I chose to exclude from the rewrite, they are Aisha and Nabu and Musa and Riven. The first because their relationship was so rushed that I find it difficult to believe they really fell in love, and the second because they fight so much and have a lot of drama (and I hate useless drama).

Sky and Bloom will be each other's love interest in season 1, but they will not become a couple until the middle of season 2, because she has to recover from the insane amount of stress she has gone through after the Trix stole her powers. Plus, she will not be interested in fake Avalon (as I said, I hate useless drama).

Charmix will be introduced at the beginning of the second season

I believe that introducing Charmix at the end of season 2 without having mentioned it before was a dumb decision. It's clear that this was a last minute idea and they didn't have the time to edit the previous episodes in order to fit it into the story. Don't get me wrong, it's perfectly understandable (I can only imagine the pain in the butt it causes to re-animate a lot of episodes), but I think that they should have recycled the Charmix concept for the next season instead of making a mess by introducing it in the last episodes.

In this rewrite, Charmix will be nominated for fhe first time when Faragonda introduces fake Avalon to the students, and it will be a requirement to pass the final exam of the second year.

There will be no Downland subplot

I sincerely don't understand why they added this, it's useless and slows down the plot. Just think that, because of the Amentia drama, the mission to rescue the Pixies lasts four episodes. Four. The others usually last one, maximum two. And since it isn't necessary, I don't understand why I should include it in the plot.

There will be less filler episodes in season 1 and 2

Just like the Downland arc, they slow down the main plot, and I would like to focus more on it. They will be present, just in a smaller number compared to the original show.

The episodes that will disappear are 1x07, 1x12, 1x15, 1x24, 1x25, 2x04, 2x06, 2x07, 2x13, 2x14 and 2x16.

As for season 3, episode 7 will be completely different. After detention, Bloom goes to Light Rock to spend some time with Daphne. She informs her about Valtor escaping from the Omega Dimension and causing chaos. Daphne then tells her sister about the Company of Light, and warns her to not let Valtor know who she is.

#winx club #rewrite #season 1 #season 3 #secret of the lost kingdom #tecna #sky #aisha #musa #flora #stella #bloom

[thedistantdusk]

Hello! Hope you're doing good! I'm a huuuuge fan of your works! You're really brilliant istg! Just wanted to ask if you're working on any Harry Potter fics currently.... I understand if you don't want to answer this. It's absolutely fine if you're on a break or something. Hope you are happy and having fun! Take care, lots of love!

Hello!

Thank you, that’s very kind.

It’s… interesting to me that this ask arrived in my inbox late last night (when this old lady was dead asleep! 😴) because this is a topic I’ve struggled with for some time. I suppose now is as good a time as any to discuss it.

After immersing myself in original content for over a year, I’ve come to the realization that I’m better suited to original publication.

I can already hear the follow-up question (“Why?”)… and yikes, I’m hesitant to answer, because my reasoning is the sort of thing that’s often misconstrued/taken personally on Tumblr.

Please know that what I’m about to say does not describe a single person or event, and it’s absolutely not intended as a personal attack. However, since I’ve been wrestling with this for some time (and since I get frequent asks about it), I’d like to think my feelings are valid enough to explain myself.

So! Here’s an explanation, in the form of a story.

A couple of weeks ago, I attended a writing conference and got the opportunity to chat with an author who’s been doing this gig for ages, with a number of professional accolades to her name. She also started out writing Harry Potter fanfic, so we got to talking about the transition from fic to OC. She no longer writes fic (and didn’t write canon pairings, so had no overlap with my experiences in that regard) but she offered a sage piece of wisdom that has stuck with me since.

I’m paraphrasing, but the gist of what she offered is that in most cases, when comparing big-name fanfic authors to big-name OC authors, the standard of content quality is almost exactly the same— but the accepted standard of professionalism couldn’t be more different.

And maybe this statement is obvious to you, but it really threw me for a loop! 😅 To clarify, she wasn’t saying that this statement is necessarily anyone’s fault, or that individual fic writers are to blame for the overall culture of some (not all!) fandoms. She also wasn’t saying that any author— or any person, in general— deserves disrespect.

She was simply commenting on the difference of what’s considered “part of the job” when comparing reader interactions between fanfic vs OC communities. She wasn’t even speaking about Harry Potter in particular, so if you’ve had a different experience, I believe you! This was her feedback, and hers alone 😄.

Unfortunately, though, it did ring extremely true for me. Imo, when “professional” authors (and yes, I hate using that term, because all authors are valid) engage in objectively outlandish/unkind behavior, they often face consequences— at least in the court of public opinion.

However, I simply can’t say the same is true for fandom. Imo, there are few other venues where folks who actually want readers/followers are publicly supported in behavior that, in my opinion, should receive a call-out instead of a round of applause.

Again, this is just my experience, and I’m not describing everyone. Many fanfic writers (including the ones I beta for 🥰) behave as true professionals. And if you’re reading this and completely disagree with me, that’s totally okay! Nothing I’m saying should be intended to take away from anything you’ve experienced. I’m simply describing my own personal feelings/the feelings of a peer with whom I discussed the transition from fandom to original culture.

So… will I write fic again? Given the circumstances I’ve described, this will be a challenge. I love organizing fic exchanges and festivals, working on the subreddit, and supporting the creation of new content. But after witnessing, first-hand, the way that OC authors engage with the public, my experiences in fandom culture feel unnecessarily toxic by comparison.

Which leads me to my point: After quite a bit of introspection, I’ve had to accept that there were many times over the past few years when I should’ve been kinder in my public handling of reader interactions/Tumblr asks.

I, myself, fell into the “fandom trap” of responding to innocent questions in a way that embarrasses me now. I take full responsibility, but I can’t change the past. The most I can do is apologize and offer a greater degree of kindness in the future.

So! I know that’s a long-winded explanation, but the transition to OC has really opened my eyes. I wholeheartedly support anyone who continues to write fic/produce for fandoms; this, again, is literally just my experience. I’ll always be around discord for a chat and conversation, but I’m not sure if writing fic is for me anymore.

In closing, it saddens me that this post (which is literally about kindness/professionalism) will probably inspire passive-aggressive reblogs and hashtags, but this will only be a prime example of why HP content creation may no longer be for me 😅.

In short, this indefinite break will probably continue, but I truly appreciate your support ❤️.

Take care!

#not harry potter #fandom culture #fanfic culture

[coconuts-mafia]

Hit Love Bite Ep 1

This did not start how I expected it to at all. What in the world. Absolutely nobody would be taking to my kid without me present. Did this person really just say the kid died from sex? Well damn, that's how I want to go. Died of perversion and foolishness? Yeah, no, I still want to go that way.

That intro song is horrible. Just no. OMG! So they really did have a consultant. Niiice! Okay, so right off the bat, we get into the kink. A vanilla would call this body worship, but it's sensualism. It's about engaging all the senses. That's why you see the armpit smelling. Sensualist typically don't shy away, they like to feel, smell, hear, and taste everything. Don't take that to a gross level, they aren't unsanitary, but they will for sure eat ass without second guessing.

Well damn. We started this off with a bang. Literally. But I got to say, if you're worried about being outed, maybe not give blowjobs in a gym locker room. Just saying. And is this teacher for real? Ohhh, I already like this secondary couple. Why is this teacher making sex a dirty thing? See no real education, just don't do it, you perverts. Then everyone is pregnant or has stds and you wonder why. Ugh, because you didn't teach them about condoms. Duh.

Oh! I love this kid. What's his name, what's his name?! Look at him being so mysterious. His name is king and the dorks name is Burger. OMG. Why do I love this so much. 🤣🤣🤣 Burger says, "Oh, really? “Burger “ and “ King” Our names are so damn good together." And King gives him the cutest smile.

Then he goes back to being Mr cool.

And product placement for acne wash. Deep stare into the eyes while they shower together. Are they hoping to get caught? No lip kisses? Why no lip kisses? Yup, at least one of them is worried about being outed. Okay so just looked up names. Ken is. He is afraid of being outted. Ken was all, I miss you baby and can you stay longer. Now he is like, bye bitch. What a cunt.

And we find out that King is king of the castle. Mr. Cool guy for real. Burger and King again. They are so cute! Burger is so fucking cute, you guys. "I'll be an extra! I can be a tree or a rock!" There is a part where he puts his tiktok count and King is like, it's only 25 viewers. "Well, it's a lot to me!" Same Burger same! 🤣🤣🤣

King accepts Burger into the acting club. Burger in his excitement jumps up and hugs him. Tackling him onto the desk. Burger is a golden retriever, and I'm here for it. How can you not be charmed, King!?

Oh, No!! Poor Shokun. Ken got himself a gf. After telling Shokun he better not. Ugh. And he publically denies even being friends with him. Yeah, no, fuck that shit. I can get not wanting to be out. Like I totally didn't claim my gf in middle school (Times were not safe peeps) but I didn't deny her as a friend. That's just shitty peopling.

King rushes to be with his friend Shokun. Yup, I like this kid. He tells him to break up with the mysterious gf that nobody knows about. Good advice King!

Burger and King! Oh... So they share a book and in Burger's book there is a drawing of King. Does someone have a crush, or is it from a previous book owner? OMG BURGER ATE THE PAPER. I am not okay. Can you die of laughter? Cause I'm pretty sure I'm going to. Like he is constantly hiding from King now. Fuck, this is some funny shit. King is like, but I have questions. I'm seeing stars from laughing so hard. Oh guys, I can't stop laughing at Burgers golden retriever antics and King slowly being charmed.

You guys, I'm going to die of laughter. Burger is so fucking shy, and it's adorably funny. Making King laugh and fall so hard. He goes from being a super cool kid to these cute little smiles. Ahhh. Okay, so Burger apparently did get a part, but he is having issues learning his lines. King coming in to help. Doing acting practices. Nice.

King brings up that Burger likes him. Burger is like, no. King clearly doesn't believe him. And then they have a cute pillow fight. With feathers going everywhere, just like I've never actually had happen. And never want to because I don't like to clean. OMG, Burger got the leading lady lead across from King. This should be so cute.

Ken, you are an asshat. You don't know why he is angry. Look, you idiot. You aren't that stupid, so stop playing dumb. Fight the attraction... um, what is your name? I forgot it. Shokun? Fight the attraction Shokun, he is a high schooler. How good could the sex really be? It's not worth this. And they are caught by none other than bestie King!

King, "I am your friend. I can accept everything you are." King over here throwing out some wisdom for his age. I will say that I'm picking up very sub vibes from Shokun and very Dom vibes from King during their talk. There is some tension slash closeness that has a D/s feel. The way Kin touches Shokun's chin and locking eyes. Even the way he stands above him.

What is king up to. And Ken coming right out to be an ass. Coming up and yelling at Shokun cause he doesn't want to be found out. He hit him with a fucking towel! Bitch, I will knock you out! Hell to the nah! That's it. Stand up for yourself. Yes! Break up!

Okay, so that's intense, but I absolutely love three of the characters out of four. I have received info that there is SA in the 2 episode, so I'm waiting until I can get a trigger buddy. So I'm not sure when the next review will be. Sorry! Hoping you enjoyed this, though! 💜💜💜

#luta talks hit bite love #luta talks kink #Coconuts mafia #hit bite love

[destinyc1020]

What do you think about Austin Butler and Kaia Gerbe? I found this Instagram https://www.instagram.com/reel/Cwa_6OqI_Vp/?utm_source=ig_web_button_native_share

Lol... judging from the video link you sent me, I'm assuming you mean what do I think of Austin and Kaia together, vs. what do I think of them individually? 😏

Whew! That's a loaded question Anon lol. I feel like I've already kind of shared my opinion about them on here quite a few times. I'm gonna try to get my thoughts together... Cuz it's a lot to say....

Okay, so first of all... I thought they were a real deal couple at first... But based on some of the things I've been seeing lately, Idk.... Something about them seems a bit contrived and smthg seems off about their rlship. 👀 (Don't hate me! Just being honest)

I'm not really a fan of the age difference (mainly with her being 21...if she were 25 I wouldn't care), but it's whatever at this point. 🙄

I think people tend to forget that Pete Davidson was dating Kaia when she was 17 (UNDERAGE mind you) and he was 26. Nobody seemed to blink an eyelash. Cara Delavigne (sp?) also seemed to be having something going on with Kaia when Kaia was 18 and Cara was about 10 years older than her too. So, like I said, Kaia isn't new to this. But for some reason, with Austin, everyone is crying bloody murder lol.

Either way, I've always been saying that no matter WHO Austin dates next, I just hope she's older than 21. 😒🙄 Cuz THAT is not a good look. I don't even know how they got together. Could have been a setup for all I know. I'm just meh about them tbh. They're a boring couple to me. She's boring I'm sorry lol. 😅

Like I've said before, I've never really taken them all that seriously (maybe some shippers/fans do, but I don't), so maybe that's why I just don't really have much of a strong reaction to them. To me, they just seem like any other couple in Hollywood that dates for a while, and then will more than likely eventually break up lol. 🤷🏾‍♀️

Btw, the lady in that link you sent had a couple of things wrong (Vaustin Aunessa dated for about 8 years.... Austin was 30, not 31, etc), but I got the main gist of the video. And there are tons of videos out there like this, sooo we definitely get the point.

The dating of Kaia aside, I honestly just think (and this is just my honest personal opinion) that a lot of people want to hate on Austin.. 😅🤣

For some reason, the internet has a huge hate boner for this guy, and I just don't get it lol. I just assume he's the internet's perpetual whipping boy at this moment in time, and people just wanna drag him just because it's the "in" thing to do. First it was the Vanessa breakup thing, then it was the Kaia thing, then it was the voice thing, then it's they think he's annoying....Some call him pretentious...or arrogant, etc...

But then, I look at his interviews present AND past, and I'm like: "Are we talking about the same person??" 🥴

Even if you think that someone is annoying, is that any reason to hate someone you don't even know with such a passion lol? 🤔 Idk it just seems a little weird to me. Almost like it's forced or something.

I almost feel like people have put a certain personality on him that's not even him lol. 😅 Every single thing I've seen of Austin (past or present) he has always seemed to be very nice, respectful, down to earth, kind, humble, maybe a little socially awkward/shy, etc. But NONE of the things people on twitter/online describe him as. So I'm always left very baffled lol. I could see if he were a trouble-maker, an abuser, or talking badly about people, or was engaged in some scandalous things over the years, but the dude literally is just a quiet person who basically works, does his job, and minds his business. 👀

So, he just might have to grow out of this "hate phase" in his career right now. I keep saying on my blog that just about EVERY actor has had a "hate" phase lol.... and it will continue to happen, because people are just weirdos and hateful for no good reason online. 🙄

But these phases don't usually last forever. It will eventually go away one of these days. Anyway, that's my long dissertation...Not sure if that answered your question Anon lol, but that's my honest opinion. 😊

#sorry for the dissertation