#and then i got sad bc i realized they don't have many opportunities in the future to really buy me stuff or show me love in that way

[biggesttmntfanintheworld]

platonic mutant mayhem! x gn! human reader headcanons

(btw this was before they got accepted by humans)

sorry if there is spelling mistakes

half of it is movie plot spoilers kinda?????

a bit of angst for leo

you were just looking at the turtles

then Splinter(he was still a little rat btw) found you, were a baby in the sewers just like the turtles

but you were human?

he was scared at first

but then he realized that you can't hurt him and the baby turtles can't too

he dragged you and the turtles to a different spot in the sewers

then he touch the ooze

he turned into a big (old) rat

your new brothers and you were jumping around like crazy

but right then and there Splinter knew he had to take care of you and your brother's

so he did!

he fed you and the turtles

he bathed you and the turtles

he did everything he could for you and the turtles

but...

one day...

while walking around the sewers you, leonardo, raphael, donatello, and michelangelo, saw the flashing lights of New York City and you being just babys wanted to see what was up there

and Splinter thought about it

'why not just try'

he thought

so you all went up there

and you guys saw the pretty lights of New York City

it was going great until...

Splinter bumped into someone

and all hell broke loose...

"the rats got a human baby!!"

a human said

another human tried to take you away

Splinter was NOT letting anyone take you away, you were his baby

so he ran to the nearest sewer

he needed to learn self-defense and you guys too..

15 years later...

(btw you the youngest)

leo

you guys are bestfriends! but..

is a little(a lot) jealous of you

i mean your human! you have so many opportunities and hes just a mutant turtle...

would BARELY let you go out

he says its bc "some human could try to kidnapped you again"(nah its bc he's scared that you'll leave him and be friends with humans)

every time he watches movies with humans in it, he always thinks about how you can do the same thing if you ever wanted to

he gets so mad thinking about it

all he wants is a girlfriend

and you can get all the girls and boys without someone screaming or fainting looking at you

and thats ALL he wants!!

he wants to look like you

a human...

anyway!

he loves and cares about you!

he's always worried if you'll get hurt when your out

he loves you sm(your his fav)

raph

he ALWAYS fights and wrestles you

but if he actually hurts you he'll feel like shit

like soooooo bad

he hurt his baby sibling:(

he'll buy steals you chocolate from the grocery store

hes not jealous of you whatsoever

he doesn't care that you're human

he loves you to death honestly

he literally calls you his baby

"no your not allowed to go outside"

"but why!"

"yeah why can't my baby go out with us"

"raph please stop calling 'name' your baby"

"BUT THEY'RE MY BABY-"

he loves you more than anything in the world

donnie

dorky asf

likes when you two watch anime together

he says its "family bonding"

also makes you listen to K-pop a lot

he says its "family bonding" again

semi jealous of you

on one hand he doesn't care that you're human but on the other hand he's really jealous

sometimes when he's listening to K-pop in the middle of the night

he thinks what it would be like to be you

you know!

anyway!

he loves you a lot

very protective like leo

worrying about your safety every time you're outside

would fix anything Tech wise for you

oh your phone broke? it magically works again

like that type of thing

he loves you sm don't ever forget that!!

mikey

COOLEST BROTHER EVERRRR

let's you do anything you want

he hugs you a lot

you guys sing rich flex pg ver(LMAOO)

says super funny jokes when your sad

he super funny!!!

he loves you a lot:3

you guys get sturdy together

he's not jealous of you one bit

why would he ever get jealous of his siblings appearance?

he NEVER gets mad at you, he loves you:3

(you have a separate room from the boys btw)

he cleans your room for you a lot(with your consent ofc)

he blows you kisses goodbye

I REALLLYYYYY HOPEEE YOU GUYS LIKE ITTTT

BTW IM GOING TO THE BEACH TODAY PRAY FOR ME

BYEEEEEEEE BYEEEEEEEEE

#mutant mayhem x reader #mutant mayhem #teenage mutant ninja turtle mutant mayhem #mutant mayhem donnie #mutant mayhem leo #mutant mayhem raph #mutant mayhem mikey #idk what else to tag #i love you all

[tau1tvec]

hey, maybe you have some advice..but how do you make your gameplay pictures so beautiful? The colours, your sims faces don't look awkward even if they aren't posed, the interior/setting always matches the vibe. Your game looks so so beautiful! Every time I'm playing for fun and take screenshots I feel good. But then I see all those posts on my dash and begin to feel bad about my own.. I want to make my game look magical too. You inspire me to play the game again, every one of your posts is so magical to me and also captures the beauty of gameplay itself. Sorry if this is too much/confusing

Okay, I’m gonna use this ask as an opportunity to be real with you, and anyone else who’s reading who also needs to hear this.

I know it’s common for everyone who’s asked this to be like, “oh no nonny, don’t do that, don’t compare your stuff to other ppl’s stuff, you’re fine the way you are,” and that’s all well meaning and sweet, but sadly this is the real world and society sucks. ✨

Despite how good it is to hear that what and how you do things shouldn’t matter, it doesn’t change the fact that social media doesn’t really care about that, and isn’t built around that mindset. In general, not comparing yourself or your work to others is incredibly difficult to do. Even I do it occasionally, impenetrable self-esteem isn’t a thing, it’s something that’s fragile and easily broken, sometimes without our ever even knowing until it’s too late. So I realized the best way to look at it, is to remove some of the negativity from it.

Controversial take, as a creative, comparing your work to others doesn’t always have to be a downer experience… it can be good, and enlightening even. The great thing about consuming media is that it can do so much for us, the appreciator, like bring us joy, bring us sadness, start a conversation, or stir inspiration, that last bit especially.

Lean into those inspirations, and no I don’t just mean other sims content. Rewatch your favorite old movies, replay your favorite old games, start a Pinterest board, go through some old family photos, create a Spotify playlist that transports you somewhere you’d rather be. Examine them, study them, focus on the colors, the lighting, the textures, there’s formulas in all kinds of media, even your mom’s old Polaroids, aim to create your own.

Learning is a never-ending journey. You can never learn enough about anything. There are so many tutorials on YouTube, and hell, even on here, if you feel like you’ve got somewhere you can improve, don’t be ashamed to do so, and change is good, bc the great thing about change is that you can do it again, and again, and that’s totally okay. Don’t be set in your ways when it comes to content creativity, it’s too beautiful a hobby for there to be any one way to be.

I think the one reason why I love Simblr so much over all other sims communities, is bc everyone here does things their own way, and everyone ( at least I hope ) appreciates each other for that. This adds variety to my dash, and makes it all the more enjoyable to look at. My game looks the way it does bc that’s how I see it in my head. I’m heavily influenced by Hayao Miyazaki, Guillermo del Torro, and old 90’s movies. I lean into the bright colors, I lean into the ideal big kitchen, I lean into the excessive neon lights, and I lean into the cringe dialogue, bc that’s what brings me joy, and that’s what brings me nostalgia.

The Sims itself brings me joy and nostalgia too, and that’s why first and foremost I enjoy playing it, lol, everything else… having a space online to share it with others who also enjoy playing it is just an added bonus.

Now as for the funky faces, there are mods out there that minimize the awkward grin, whether they still work idk tho.

You can also try putting a little more space between the bottom of your sim’s nose and their top lip, it might look weird in CAS, but this will help avoid a lot of the wonkiness from the over-exaggerated smiles in-game.

Learning to love sims for all their quirks, bad animations, and goofiness is also a good tip. 😆

#asks #anon #sorry this is long #help

[allthecastlesonclouds]

hi giving you an opportunity to infodump about wips and fic ideas <3

AGADSGFJHASDFJKH bird got my fic rambles so. you get my OCs sorry i don't make the rules they are forever a wip and i refuse to shut up about them

SO they're technically backgroundish characters for a DnD world bc Teary is part of the Pantheon for the world but. it's not about them it's about my guys!!

so teary is the son of Light and Shadows. his full name is tearithus, because why the hell not he can have some drama as a treat, he starts as a funky little imp, a bard-esque guy, who's kind of the comedic relief? he's the least toxic-masculinity-ified man you've ever met, though, because. his mother refused. their story is in three arcs and between one and two he gets mass promoted from imp to archdevil bc. yknow. saving the world and all that jazz. anyway he gets some body issues deals with that for a While. he deals with them by creating a magic circle that creates a 'permanent' shape change on his body to send his actual form to the ethereal plane. (he does not deal with them for a While.) he's loud and dramatic until literally anyone in the party starts talking, and then. he just sits and listens.

and his bestie my bestie chara. it's not her actual name (that's barely shared bc. points. fae). her title is the lady of fire, keeper of memories and watcher of time, but she doesn't try to get into that much. she's just a sad gay phoenix woman who misses her wife. she is So Self-Sacrificing and for what? Self hatred?? anyway she lost her wife in the First War, got her wife's Orb, and realized that she's possibly never going to see her wife again because her soul is nowhere. she's a fae (bc phoenix) and so struggles a lot in transitions between realms, but the transition that hit her hardest was, naturally, faerie to material. her wife helped her then. a millenia later, teary shows up at her doorstep, bleeding out, and she helps him just how she was helped. she has innate magic (sorcerer!!) and absolutely loves fucking with her own appearance. her spellcasting focus is her wedding ring– when she realized teary set up the Circle to hide his appearance, she said she wouldn't tell if he hid her ring too– focuses are targeted, she points out, and she'll be damned if she ever loses that. she can die and 'be reborn', but it's based on deals: if she dies, she gets sent to Liminality, too far from where she knows safety, and a Demon or Angel pops up to offer her a deal. she haggles and returns to life with some benefit or disadvantage. towards the end of arc two, she gets hung, and returns in a blaze of fire with true sight, but her Actual Vision is taken– her eyes are pure flame.

if duos were made of my guys, chara and mini would get paired up a lot just because teary and august are Love Interests TM. this whole friend group are Friends With Each Other, and these two have that good good sapphic/aroace bonding. they're besties. they're competitors. they have completely different views on the gods. mini, if i had to sum them up in a 'describe your character like Shit challenge,' would be: an amnesiac ghost wakes up in the Liminality with a sword and decides to solve a mystery. mini is self named– short for minutia– and they're a paladin of the Innkeeper, one of the Pantheon (Time). Mini's title starts as 'The Sword of the Innkeeper' and they are a damn good paladin. they don't have control over too many things at the start– their main motivation is to know Who They Are– but, really, their main arc is finding themself in the world itself, figuring out that they are not defined by who they were in life. it helps that, being a ghost and a dead elf, they have almost complete resistance to magical effects on physical forms and non-magic weapons– they will refuse to die. they're not naïve, but they are optimistic, which pairs them and teary together against chara and august pretty often, who are a bit more pessimistic/pragmatic.

and! speaking of august! my darling augustine, High Angel of Mercy. she begins the story serving under Life, but ends up just serving the cause, the belief of Mercy. She, of all Immortals, is the one pushing closest to Godhood without being one. she doesn't want to be one. she died half a decade into the First War– she was followed home from a town square performance and shot twice– and she's been Working In This Vein of Bullshit for the longest. if i had to give her a dnd class it would be monk: she does the punches, not the magics, but thoroughly diverts the 'magics person is the leader, punchies are the henchman with no thoughts' idea by Being So On Top Of Her Shit. she's got portals set up to each Plane, commissions Sending Earrings/Rings for the group, does a lot of Heaven's paperwork, and is too much of a perfectionist to not Have Her Shit Together. she's not, exactly, go-with-the-flow as much as the rest of the group is, because she is Terrified Of Fucking Up, but she is ruthless and impulsive in battle once she knows the people she's fighting have Wronged in a way that cannot be reprieved. also, she likes to dance. wonder what that's about? couldn't be her Life.

teary and chara have known each other the longest: legends build, you see, and townsfolk are afraid, and so when Teary came to the Material he got shot. a couple times. and a kind soul in the woods told him of the Firebird in the Mountains, so you best believe he hightailed it up there. he found her, and she helped him, and they have tea every Tuesday, where they absolutely gossip and are happy to admit it.

teary and august met next: teary works in hell for a Long While– being an imp, not a god, where would he go?– and august is basically the Deal With Anything Anywhere department of heaven, so when some trappings of Uncanny Necromancy starts to pop up on the material– and they're summoning from both Heaven and Hell– august goes Give Me One'a You Guys and gets teary to help her out. they become friends and just. keep working together.

then there's something messing with faerie, their souls being trapped in heaven instead of melting into the Being Of The World, and teary goes 'gustie i know a guy' and drags in chara. chara and august are DELIGHTED with each other and bond over lightly ribbing teary and also pretty women and also the world is fucked up and we lost Too Much to War, didn't we? anyway they get that cleared up :)

mini comes along last– it's 6 years into the Second War when heaven and hell stop receiving souls and august realizes there's a backup at the Inn at The End of The World. the innkeeper goes Help Me Please the Inn Isn't Made To Hold This Many People and mini, being one of these souls and being nosy and also knowing 'hey i worshipped this one. that's my Diety Right There' goes how can i help? and! the party is complete!

i'll shut up now but there may be a post about the Pantheon if i'm ever prompted with anything because. these ones are my guys but the Pantheon lets me weave words yknow?

#castles ocs #ren <3 #listen. i love them. theyre my darlings. #and i'm talking i guess #i did art of teary and mini and august a while back (not cassie. she's hard) but. the designs aren't up to date so :/ as of now unposted! #this ask was likely about fanfics bc it was a wip ask game but. my GUYS. it's my GUYS. i don't care how tropey they are i LOVE them

[jonathanbiers]

tagged by @thehairthefreak thank you for tagging me!! i do love an excuse to overshare with y'all

favorite time of the year? the very beginning of spring, when it's still comfortable temperatures out (i live in the very far south of the us so this is like the last time it's 70 degrees) but the flowers and bees are starting to come back, also halloween season comfort food? definitely gumbo favorite dessert? root beer float things you collect? lil hobbies. i have adhd so i pick up so many creative hobbies. namely writing, bass, sewing, embroidery, those are the main ones. i might drop them for months at a time but i always come back and pick them up like no time has passed. also rocks favorite drink? i don't drink alcohol if that's what this is talking about. all time favorite beverage is probably peach crush, but right now i am hyperfixating on lime cucumber gatorade (it's so weird) favorite musical artist? loathe, hands down. i saw them live in april and it was the best day of my life. i gave myself whiplash from headbanging too hard and had bruises on my legs from moshers pushing all the front row ppl into the stage, and i got to meet them afterwards (except for erik he was busy) and they signed the vinyl i bought and gave me hugs and i just wish i had time to tell feisal he's the reason i started playing the bass again. i will try to next time they come to the us. also griffin taylor from vended (the first opener at that show) spit on me and i realized some things that day last song listened to? echolalia by faetooth last movie watched? the hobbit last series watched? stranger things currently watching? on my 5th rewatch of the last kingdom current obsession? i think it's kind of obvious given the content of this blog ajgfhksdf dream place to visit? i don't have a specific place in mind, but at some point during my upcoming vacation i want to drive far enough to see the actual night sky without all the light pollution place you wanna go back to? i don't have an answer for this one bc i've never had the money or opportunity to go anywhere, except to the nearest big city for concerts. but i don't go because of the place it's for the concerts so i don't think it counts something you want? not to be all existential and sad but literally just to exist freely as who i am without fearing for my safety irl that'd be fucking crazemazing currently working on? 2 chaptered fics (1 stranger things + 1 cyberpunk2077) 1 oneshot and 1 that may end up as a chaptered fic, and may just end up being one long thing. also learning doomtech by vein.fm on the bass and attempting to sew a pocket into a pair of jeans that doesn't have one

tagging the first 5 mutuals on my dash (sorry if you've already been tagged/don't like these hdjshgks in that case just ignore): @eddiemunsonbby @metal-munson @dankpunks @t4teddie @eddies-guitar-pick

[mlchaelwheeler]

I like this season, and I like the vecna plot but the episodes are so long and there’s just a lot going on. For me it makes me realize that less is more. The first two seasons had shorter episodes and were generally simpler, but they were still able to focus on the key characters. The first three seasons only took like six months to film (not including editing ofc etc), and the first three seasons didn’t take as long to write, especially not season 1 and season 2. From the return to filming in 2020 season 4 took almost a year to film the season. Like I can understand that covid would have really impacted the filming upon the return, but I also think a hugee reason why it took so long was because it would’ve been complicated to film with the three plotlines being set in different locations, not to mention how long the episodes are. 

Tbh I’d prefer shorter episodes like in s1 and s2 that don't have too many plotlines to follow, the first two seasons felt so effortless but this season sometimes feels overly complicated. The duffers said that they structure the seasons like they’re a movie almost and I do see that with the first three seasons, but this season it almost feels like we’re watching 3 separate movies lol. Idk, I know they were only going to do one or two seasons at first and sometimes it’s kinda evident imo especially considering s1 started filming almost immediately after season 1 aired and idk it feels like the same show but it also doesn’t at time lol. I want them to go back to the basics honestly lol, and can they just have the byers in hawkins next season because i don’t really want another cali road trip plot even though it’s entertaining hahahaah. Sorryyy this is a bit of a rant lmaooo

No, I totally get your frustration! I also miss the simplicity of S1 and S2 where there was really only 1-2 main plot lines going on. With S4 however, there are 4 main plots, but I feel like only 2 of them really got well-fleshed out: Hawkins and the HNL. The Hawkins plot was my favorite this season, since everything came together really well and all the characters worked so well together. The HNL plot line was also super interesting and connected so beautifully to the Hawkins plot line when 001 was revealed to be Vecna.

The cali plot line was a missed opportunity imo, since they were given almost no scenes compared to the other 3 plots (they weren't even in 4x07!) and 2 of the characters are main characters from S1. It was really sad to see Mike and Will sidelined so bad in comparison to new characters like Jason and Eddie (i love him, but the main characters deserved a good portion of his screentime imo). The Russia plot line also kind of felt like a missed opportunity, mostly bc I feel like Hopper's plot didn't really pick up until 4x06 when he was put in the demopit. His scenes in the first 5 episodes didn't seem to have really any impact on the rest of the plot this season, so I wish they would've allocated this time to the cali crew.

Another thing I was unhappy about is that only the Hawkins and HNL plots seemed to be important to the overall story. The Russia plot has no connection to Vecna at all, and only involved the upside down when the demogorgan was introduced. Now, I know the mindflayer is somehow captured in Russia, but this will probably only play a role in 4x09, or the back half of 4x08. Similarly with the cali plot line, I feel like it started off good--establishing tension between Mike, El, and Will and allowing El to struggle without her powers--but once El was "taken," the plot was seemingly put on gold. It's like the writers forgot Mike, Will, and Jonathan used to be main characters and shoved them aside in favor of El. As someone who loved that stranger things used to be an ensemble show, I'm getting really sick of how much El has been spotlighted recently. I absolutely love her, but her storyline can be developed the same without giving her 50% of the screen time of each season.

This also kind of turned into a rant 🧍🏼‍♂️ oops

#hopefully this kind of answered your question tho lol <3 #feel feee to rant in my askbox anytime haha #ask sarah #anon tag

[aft3rhrs]

ari.. tell me it's normal to be envious of your best friends? 😭 i have 2 bestie and both of them have such loving boyfriends. their bf always spoil them.. buy them things.. and gifts.. well my besties deserve all of them ofc! they're both awesome girls and i love them so much but at some occasions when they tell me abt their boyfriends.. i can't help but get jealous bcs oh god i'm just a pathetic bitch who have never experienced being in love (moreover having someone who share the same mutual feeling with you 😭) T__T gosh this surely is a silly ask huh i'm so sorry for the spam! you always seemed like a good listener and i've always wanted to hit you up to talk but i'm.. very shy.. (<3 love u ari)

babyyyy :( first of all, you can always pop into my dms — or whatever makes you comfortable. either way, this ask isn't silly! no such thing ❤️

your feelings are valid. it's okay to be lonely, sad, angry — we don't have much control over our emotions, so don't blame yourself for them. they're not right or wrong — they just are. and they can certainly be a good indicator of where our wounds lie.

the only thing we can really control is how we react to them. sometimes, we end up acting out in ways that are unhealthy for us or the people around us. putting yourself down is just one of the many ways to do that.

it's good that you're so self aware, but please be gentle with yourself — you can use this experience as an opportunity to grow. if something hurts, it probably needs healing. ask yourself why. you need to realize that you are good enough and worthy of love. you just haven't met your person yet, and there's nothing wrong with that. nothing wrong with you, either.❤️ everyone's journey is just different.

don't be afraid to heal your wounds. it will only get harder in the long run, the more you let them rot— your friends deserve to be happy and get spoiled, and so do you! it's a blessing when your loved ones are safe and sound. don't let any insecurity drag you down.

I know you got this and you have all of my support. ❤️ you can always reach out to me! <3 I love you more 🥺

#asks #cuties

[zeynatura]

Returning to the hell that is Genshin

I stopped playing before Heizou came out, but came back because Scara got playable and i still had some primos so i decided to spend them all and leave the game for good this time but guess what happened c:

I literally had enough for 20 wishes, first 10 and got Gorou my sweet puppy general i've always wanted but didn't get even when i spent 70 wishes on his first banner and got Itto instead le cries

So i was like: ok i'm happy with this, is nice c:

Then last 10 wishes hit me like a truck

Ayo wha-

I did not expect this xD i was totally ready to get nothing and say c'est la vie! and goodbye to genshin forever... but then i got the opportunity to have the all geo team i always wanted and my dream all anemo boys as well.

None of my Geo characters have a good build, and i stopped playing before my anemo chars got to have a good one, at least they're decent, except for the new boi

Wanna see what is like to fight an Eye of the Storm with an all anemo team?

Tbh i had fun attacking physically while Wanderer was just there looking xD like the seniors showing the new kid how it's done pfft

I also found out Hoyoverse now gives daily rewards and so i was thinking of maybe loging daily for them and save them for when Baizhu is coming, bc we all know he's coming and he's the one i want the most that would make me want to pull for him..

But then the Hoyoverse bastards decided to have a TCG event right in the middle of my obession with Shadowverse and while my love for card games is stronger than ever

So i've been doing nothing but having duels with NPCs ;u; i hyperfocused last night and didn't realize i played till 4 am help

The reasons i stopped playing Genshin was mostly bc of the toxic fandom, then not having enough time, between my complicated life and the many online videogames i play i decided to prioritize the ones i've been playing the longest and so genshin as the new game had to go, at that time i already got the characters i wanted and didn't like the rushing feeling of the story in Genshin and i still don't so it wasn't that sad, the best part imo is the fancontent which i continued to consume and the reason i found out about the new playable chars cause i literally blocked all the official genshin accs xD

Now i really hope i don't get too much into the game again, for my own good, cause is not even a game i can enjoy casually and on my time like King's Raid or Hero Cantare, in those games you have no rush to be up to date with the newest main quest and it does not punish you if you miss events and they're all gacha.. is just that Genshin is literally the worst gacha i've ever played and i play a lot of them and i am f2p in all of them cause i have a lot of trauma- i mean self restraint when it comes to spending money (i literally made a vow to myself that if Lucifer gbf ever gets playable and i don't get him with all my f2p currency i will spend irl money cause he's the only character that's worth it)

Anyway i just wanted to share my experience, cause i vented to my friends that don't play gacha and got silence as a response, well they did make a comparizon of toxic games some of them play like LoL and DBD saying that Genshin was my toxic game haha

#vent post

[the-scarecrxw]

4, 6, 38

ALSO I MISS U TOO 😭😭

I’m so bad at talking to people but I think about you all the time 🥺

- @nsfwitchy2

ahhh yeah I miss u so much witchy!!! I'm very bad at talking to people too but legit you see anything you think I'd like just dm me! pop me a meme, art, etc, IDC!! I'm always happy when people message me :)

(cw for brief discussion of sexual themes, not gonna go all out on tagging this thing, just beware ig)

Past labels you’ve used? + What made you realize your current labels fit you?

oh my god I've gone through soo many. first I was heteroflexible. then bisexual. then pansexual. then pan aromantic greyasexual. then then Gender hit me. genderfluid. genderqueer. then I dropped the aromantic bc I truly have no idea wtf romantic attraction is. then I just said fuck it and went with non-binary. then I back pedaled to bi mostly bc I prefer the flag over pan's flag. then I went full tilt nb butch lesbian for awhile, then went back to bi hesitantly. then I started having dreams where I was born male and dressed femme and I was so happy in the dreams and so so sad when I woke up that it hit me that oh wait I'm kinda a boy, huh. I don't fuck around much with labels now, I don't stress too much about it. To anyone outside the queer community I'll say I'm a bisexual transman, but if I had to define I'd say I'm biromantic asexual transmasculine, T4T preferred. truly the dream would be to be gnc amab but we can't have that huh. the bi is cuz like... as woman aligned I never felt comfortable being attracted to men, but when I realized I was transmasc I very suddenly had my attraction to men turn up to 11. But I'm picky about what type of man i would date. like a cis men would make me cautious, especially if they're bi bc I guess I'd be afraid they'd just see me as the "best of both worlds" sorta shit, male but pretty and has an easy access hole. A cis gay man I suppose I'd be more comfortable with bc he wouldn't see me as a woman bc he's gay. I think I'd also have that bi worry with cis women but honestly I feel so much more comfortable around women vs cis men that I couldn't be too picky. Straight women who date transmen tho? beloved. Also I'm very trans4trans. would love to date another trans person. tres magnifique. the asexual is bc I realized I don't... like... sex. for myself with other people. in person. I'll sext, I do nsfw rp, I'll jerk it on my own with porn, but I have never been totally comfortable or able to orgasm with another person (well. I've only been there twice but ejfjshdb) But I'm also a naturally kinky person but those lend well to some of my sexuality. and the transmasc instead of transman is bc I still feel a slight ... kindred spirit with femininity I guess. I like "girl" talks with my girl friends sometimes. Also if I could be very gnc and still be seen as a man I would. so fucking hard. like fuck. so yeah. also I still have no clue about romantic feelings but I think that's the autistic in me.

Do you own pride merch? Would you like to?

I would like to! But only from queer small businesses honestly. big corp pride can go home. I bought my pronoun pin from a queer Etsy store, and I think that's my only "pride" stuff. I do have a few rainbow items, like a pair of suspenders and a baseball cap my mom bought for me that says "love" in rainbow on it, but I rarely have opportunity to wear either (and I don't like hats) OH I do have a mini rainbow flag I got years ago for free at my first and only pride event I've been to, and also a rainbow patterned washcloth for free from the statefarm booth they had at the event lmao. but yeah I'd love more pride stuff ugh

#asks #nsfwitchy2 #ask games

[365text]

real talk who else cried to the “chicken soup for the ... soul” series when u were younger

#annie.txt #i was thinking about this bc i was internal monologuing in the prev post's tags about buying a digital keyboard for myself #and remembered how my dad wanted to buy one for me a few years back but i said it was fine bc 1) i wouldn't have time or space rly to use it #while in college u feel #and also 2) i didn't realize the tech (esp in recent years) has gotten so much better ?? for weighted keyboards !! it's like a real piano ?? #but then i was thinking about how if i wanted to buy it now i'd probs buy it for myself since i'm working full time #and i thought about how it'd be nice if i could have my parents still buy it for me still bc it is kinda $$$ #but then i thought about how that really wasn't necessary bc again i work full time now (albeit i just started but still i make enough that #i can do it for myself and not have to ask my parents to shell out that money for me u feel) #but then i thought about how my parents always want to buy me gifts / birthday presents bc that's how my hashtag asian parents show me love #through food and attempts at purchasing me useful things #like jackets #or a 'better mattress' #even if i don't need or necessarily want them LOL #and then i got sad bc i realized they don't have many opportunities in the future to really buy me stuff or show me love in that way #and now im all teary eyed bc the idea of aging parents and #them passing away just gets me every time.... #familial themes makes me cry the most consistently in media too lol #but anyways all that's to say is that it reminded me of chicken soup for the soul books bc i used to sob to those #bc man those stories are sO SAD #also unrelated to how i got here but interestingly tangential: i read those books at my piano teacher's house HAHA

[yourmidnightlover]

never go back

Summary: spencer notices how your boyfriend takes advantage of you and finally does something about it.

TW: titty sucking, oral (female receiving), cheating, dom!spencer, scratching, slapping (only one), cursing, choking, spencer dirty talk lol, penetrative sex, creampie. *let me know if i missed anything*

WC: 3,724

A/N - i'm using noah as the 'other man' schtick in probably all of my future one shots bc i can't find it within myself to create a new character each and every time. so your douche of a bf will always be noah miller. if you ever get a nice bf i'll be sure to change his name but for now this is what we're working with. got it? got it.

masterlist

-------------------------------

there are many things that people should go back to. schooling, maybe an old job, an old vacation spot.

your boyfriend was not one of those things.

mostly because your boyfriend sucked.

it was now a fact that spencer reid himself had come to believe quite a while ago and now, well now he had reason.

he had always felt as though you were too good for noah, similar for practically anyone in existence (himself included). he was always a complete ass to you no matter the circumstance.

there was one time the entire team had been back really late from a case that took a toll on all of you. it was emotionally and physically draining. the flight back had been delayed because of weather issues in the state you had been in, meaning you couldn't leave until days after it was solved.

any time you had gone to answer the phone, spencer would be able to see your stance and body language through the glass window. you had been apologizing for something you couldn't even control. you would narrow your brows the way you only did when you were being yelled at. you bit your lip the way you did when you were being made to feel guilty.

he was guilt tripping you for something you couldn't even control.

when you had gotten back it wasn't any better. noah had been giving you the cold shoulder. he was defensive when you asked what was wrong.

and that was only 3 weeks into the relationship.

after being together for 2 months, you had gotten flowers delivered on your desk. you assumed they were from your boyfriend, reasonably so, and went to go thank him. spencer saw the shock in your eyes when you saw your boyfriend huddled in the corner with some new intern. spencer saw the look in your eye change from sadness to anger in the blink of his own.

you took a deep breath, and walked away from the situation, completely missing the way he tucked the intern's hair behind her ear as he leaned in to whisper something to make her giggle. when you got back to your desk you threw the flowers in the garbage can, not even bothering to read the note.

it was pretty indirect, but looking into it he realized it was an issue that should've been addressed. every time the team would go out together, everyone was clearly invited. you would always decline because 'noah wanted to take me out tonight' or 'noah said he needs me, so i'll have to rain check'.

it wasn't because you were a bad person, the opposite actually. it was because noah was taking advantage of your kindness.

because any time you needed him, 'noah's out with the boys' or 'noah had to work late' or, here's a kicker, 'noah had a hard time at work'. as if you don't have a hard time looking at dead bodies while he just has to write up reports.

even when you got injured during a case, shot in the shoulder, noah seemed as though he couldn't have cared less. he wouldn't even go to your apartment to visit you while you were in recovery because 'noah didn't have time to visit'.

spencer could even recall when you went out with the girls one night, spencer being the designated driver, that you had told them how 'noah didn't want you to dress too provocatively so you had to wear something more modest'.

now, spencer doesn't care all to much about what you wear because, frankly, it's none of his business. but now that he heard how noah cared oh-so-much, he decided to wrack his brain for the 'provocative' outfits you've worn. there was not a single one that anyone should make a comment about. you looked stunning no matter what you wore, so you'd grab any man's attention no matter the clothing on your body.

but spencer? he made sure to never be that much of an asshole to you. he made sure to make up for him being an asshole.

he would grab you some morning coffee like you always had before you had a boyfriend. he would make sure to tell you that you looked lovely when you were able to go out with the team. he would visit you when you injured yourself and were lonely, he even stayed back for a few days with you to help you get through it.

hell, he was the one to get you the flowers. you had been having a rough week and spencer thought it might cheer you up. he had gifted you a bouquet of 12, blue chiffon flowers because those were your favorite.

but this was his breaking point. you had come to his apartment, once again in the middle of the night, talking about noah fucking miller cheating on you.

he had done it once before when he was 'out with the boys' you decided to stop by when he said he'd be back, wanting to just be the amazing girlfriend that you are. so when you walk in and hear your boyfriend moaning along with another woman that isn't you, you immediately run back out. you run back out and drive all the way to spencer's.  

and here you are again. spencer wasn't mad at you, it was noah he was mad at. he couldn't believe what he was hearing.

spencer had always liked you, no, he's always loved you. everything about you. how could he not? you're perfect.

but loving you how he does and seeing you being used as a toy to fuck for a certain noah miller not only made his heart ache but also made his blood boil.

spencer wasn't an idiot. he had heard the way the old morgan had referred to women. the thing is, noah is way more of a fuckboy than the old morgan ever was. and that scared spencer to pieces. he knew that you would only be missing out on team outings just to get fucked by a douchebag. he knew that the only reason said douchebag wouldn't visit you was because you couldn't fuck. he knew that the reason said douchebag was cornering that intern was to fuck her, too.

so when you arrived at spencer's place, this time you weren't crying. you were furious. you were angry and upset, as was spencer.

"he did it again, spence," you breathed out as you paced across his living room floor. "i was supposed to meet him in a few hours but i was going to surprise him and i caught him with another tramp! i didn't even confront him. i just- i just left!"

"cheated? noah?" he asked as if he didn't believe it at first, not wanting to seem like as much of a dick as noah.

"yes! cheated. god! i am so ANGRY!" you ran your hand through your hair, a grunt leaving your mouth. "and... and frustrated! and... UGH!" you sighed aggressively.

"and what?" spencer asked as he stood up, slowly making his way to you. "what else?" he said, his hand now brushing that stubborn strand of hair behind your ear.

"i-i'm..." you trailed off, getting lost in his beautiful eyes.

if you were honest with yourself, you'd admit how much you loved spencer. but you thought he'd never love you like that. not since you helped him through jj getting married. he really thought she was it for him, at least that's what you'd come to think he believed. over the years you had grown so much closer and grown such an attraction for each other that the other person knew about. it was ironic, truly.

"say it, y/n," spencer leaned over you, his lips ghosting over yours. "i need to hear you say it."

"god, just kiss me," you said, your hands flying to the back of his hair to push his mouth to yours.

there was no hesitation from spencer to give you everything he had. his hand on the side of your face remained there as his other hand drifted to your waist to pull you closer to his body. your tongues met fervently with covetous, passion, and longing yet with just gentle firmness that felt protecting and as if it was how everything was supposed to be.

"please, spencer," you quietly whispered once you unlatched from one another.

"please what, princess," he asked, his hand running through your hair.

"i just... i need you," she pleaded with him, her hands still tugging gently on his hair. "please," you put your foreheads together, breathing in each others air as you silently begged him to help you in any way that he could.

"i'd do anything for you," he whispered so delicately as if the entire team were standing right beside you. "you know i'd do anything for you."

"then do something," you demanded.

spencer took action by kissing you just as intensely as before, this time his hands went to your ass. he grabbed your thighs to signal for you to jump, once you did you wrapped your legs around his torso as he carried you into his bedroom. he set you down just in front of the bed before you began to undo his shirt, him returning the favor by undoing yours.

"god, i've wanted you for so long," he growled, nipping gently at your earlobe as he laid you back on the bed. "lift your hips," he ordered, you obeyed his every command. you always would. "good girl," he praised as he ran his hands down your now bare waist.

"please," you begged, your hips bucking up to get any source of friction. "spencer..." you trailed off.

"i know, princess. i know," he said before climbing on top of you, connecting your lips with his once again, this time much more eager than before if that were possible.

as you arched your back, he took the opportunity to unclasp the hook on your bra. you shrugged it off your shoulders to allow him to throw the bra somewhere else in his room. he finally took a breath, removing his lips from yours to admire the view in front of him.

"god, you're so beautiful," he growled before placing gentle but eager kisses along the tops of your breasts, massaging the one his mouth wasn't on.

he pressed his knee between your legs, allowing you to buck your hips up to get that release you wanted so bad. you whined as he took your nipple in his mouth, his tongue flicking past it rapidly as he occasionally nibbled on it gently.

"spen-spencer," you ran your hands through his hair, tugging gently on the roots.

"mmm," he sat his head up, trailed kisses up your throat. "god, i love you so much."

"i-i love you," you moaned, pulling his head up to connect your lips together. "i love you so so much."

"i'm so glad to hear that," he huffed a sigh of relief. "because otherwise it'd be awkward when i did this," he began trailing kisses down your body, leading down towards your center. "i'll show you what it's like to be with a man that actually loves and respects you, yea? show you what it feels like to actually be pleased by a man? what it's like to be with a real man?" he teased.

his fingers trailed around your entrance, gathering your arousal that'd been building for what felt like ages. he pressed gentle kisses around your pussy before finally connecting his lips with your clit, a low groan emitting from your body because of the contact.

"yes, please," you shot your head back, relishing in the feeling of the direct skin contact.

"hey," spencer slapped your thigh, your head shot back up to see him between your legs, a truly beautiful sight that you'd never get tired of. "eyes on me," he demanded before going back down on you, not breaking eye contact as he brought out sounds from you that you weren't even sure you could make. "talk to me, princess. let me know how it feels."

"fe-feels so good," you sighed, taking your breasts in your hands and massaging them. "i-i can-can't even think," you stuttered out, too caught up in the pleasure to form a coherent sentence.

you had felt so good as he sucked on your clit, succeeding in bringing you closer to the edge than noah ever has, but when he inserted two fingers into your entrance...

"oh my fuck!" your hands shot down to grab onto his locks, pushing him further into your body, a low groan leaving him.

his fingers didn't stop their work. he curled them at just the right spot, sending you flying over the edge. spencer used his free hand to grab onto your thigh to keep them from closing in completely on his head, still working you through your high. he placed a kiss on your clit once more before he brought his head up to you, connecting your lips passionately.

"could noah ever make you come like that? huh? could he make you feel so good you could barely even think?" he grabbed your chin in his hands, holding it in place to look at him as you shook your head the best you could. "no?"

"mm-mm," you tried to shake your head 'no' once more.

"did you think of him while i was going down on you? were you thinking about how he fucked that little tramp?" he asked harshly, you shook your head 'no' again. "oh, what were you thinking, princess?" he finally released your face so you could speak.

"ab-about how well you know my body. about how, how good you looked between my legs. about how much i love you," you replied quickly, knowing exactly what to say.

"right answer," he connected your lips once more. "what do you want, love?" he asked, peppering soft kisses along your jaw where his hands once held your throat firmly.

"you. i-i want you in-inside me," you swallowed, your hand finding his and pulling it up to your lips to press a kiss to it, then another, then another, then another. "please, doctor?" you used your best puppy dog eyes you knew he couldn't resist.

"god, call me that again," he rasped lowly.

"what... doctor?" you took his hand and started sucking on his fingers, letting them slip in and out slowly and then moving onto the next.

"fuck, yes," he growled as he pressed another kiss to your lips before lining himself up at your center. "are you sure, princess?" he traced your jaw with the fingers you were previously sucking on.

"yes, sir," you nodded. "i'm sure."

you felt him slowly push inside of you slowly to allow you to adjust to his size. you had your suspicions of how big he was, but feeling him inside of you made it all much more real.

"fuck, you're so tight," he moaned into your ear quietly as he slowly pulled back out, going in just as slow.

"sp-spence-"

"wrong," he slapped your face gently, a whimper leaving your lips before he grasped your face to make you look him in the eyes.

"doc-doctor," you corrected yourself.

"good girl," he said, feeling your pussy clench from the praise. "oh you like that?" he felt it again. "maybe you just like hearing me talk, yea?" his pace began picking up slowly. "you like hearing how this pussy makes me feel? how tight... and warm... and wet it is?"

"u--uh huh," you nodded your head the best you could as he began thrusting much more rapid, hitting that special spot inside of you with each movement.

"it seems like you haven't felt this good in a long time huh? haven't had your pussy pounded like this in a while?" he asked as he was catching his breath.

"ne-never, doctor," you confirmed, hands reaching around his back and dragging your nails down, surely leaving scratch marks all down them.

"fuck," he growled. "noah never made you feel this good princess? never made you forget how to speak in sentences? never knew how to get you going like this?"

"n-no, no! never! god, never!" you cried as you pulled his body even closer to you. "i-i'm close, please!"

"you wanna come all over my dick, yea? you want to show me how much your pussy loves it when a real man fucks it?"

that was it to let that spring burst inside of you, parts flying everywhere. you cried his name as he worked you through your orgasm, holding onto his shoulders and hair to keep you grounded.

"cum inside me, please," you begged. "fi-fill me up."

"fuck, whatever you want, princess," he kept pounding into you at a rapid pace. "god, i'm gonna come inside you, and send you back to that scumbag of a boyfriend so he can see that you're mine now. so he can see what happens when his girlfriend is mistreated and fucked by someone who knows what they're doing, yea?"

"yea, yea!" you whined, nails digging back into his skin as he released his load into you, thrusting it gently back inside after.

"god, i love you so much," he moaned into your ear, pressing a kiss to your cheek by your ear.

"i love you," you replied, stroking his hair to help him come down, him still inside of you. he began thrusting inside of you once again.

"don't want any of it to spill out before you get to him," he felt you clench around him one more time. "you're very responsive, princess. i like that about you."

"it-it's just you, spence. it's always been you," you pulled him in for another kiss.

this one was full of passion but not the kind of eagerness. it was full of desire and longing, pent up emotions flowing out into one another fluidly.

"now let me go see my soon-to-be-ex-boyfriend," you huffed as he pulled out of you, wincing from the overstimulation. "i'll see you later?"

"i'll see you later," he pressed a kiss to your forehead before helping you gather your clothes.

driving back to his apartment, you felt rather giddy with yourself. should you have felt bad? absolutely not. he's a manipulative asshole who's used you for sex on numerous occasions, so he deserved the bittersweet irony of what was coming to him.

*get it, coming to him? lol i'm sorry i had to :)*

you knocked on the door softly, greeted by a rather chipper noah who grabbed your face as soon as he saw you, connecting your lips. his kiss was nothing like spencer's. his lips weren't as soft and tentative. they weren't plump and round, they were harsh and rough and unpleasant.

he quickly led you to the bedroom, not to your surprise. he sat down on the bed, you straddled his hips, acting as if it were spencer instead - which was pretty hard to do after knowing what he was like in the sack.

you felt his boner through his pants quickly after you got on top of him. then when he flipped you over and pulled your pants and underwear down, he was met with a surprise.

"someone's excited to see me," he chuckled before licking a thick stripe from your slit to clit, very aggressive to where it almost hurt to have the pressure. "god you taste so good, doll."

he continued at this for a while, inserting his tongue to your hole very once in a while and licking up yours and spencer's arousal with it. you faked your moans and whimpers as his ministrations became more eager, not really getting you anywhere.

after he was finished with your turn - no, he didn't even make you cum - he laid back on the bed as if he were waiting for you to get on top of him again.

"actually," you stood up from the bed, pulling up your clothes with you. "i'm done with this. we're over."

you watched his face as he took in the information just released to him. it changed from surprised and shocked, to confused, to disgusted, to angry and frustrated.

"what the fuck?" he sat up from the bed, a disgruntled look on his face. "you wait until after you cum to tell me this?" he walked over to you, arms flailing in the air.

"yea. i did. and by the way, i didn't cum," you informed him. "that's something you've never really been good at making me do. although i'm not sure how you've been able to convince me to do anything with the way you treat me."

"what do you mean? i'm a good gu-"

"shut up for one second, please," you rolled your eyes, running your hand through your hair. "i know you've cheated on me numerable times. i stayed because i thought that maybe there was a reason, but i've come to realize that i was just... settling with you," you shrugged.

"you've treated me like crap since this 'relationship' started and i'm tired of it. i know someone who not only treats me with respect and kindness, but can also actually make me cum. shocker," you chuckled.

"who is this asshole? what the hell-"

"i wasn't finished, sweetie," you spat out viciously. "he's not an asshole. you're the asshole. you're the one that's getting dumped. so this is goodbye," you turned around to walk out of his room before leaving him with one more thought. "how did his cum taste with mine?" you tilted your head innocently, smiling at his shocked face as he realized what you meant before walking out.

and you were never more glad that you didn't have to go back to him anymore.

taglist:

@muffin-cup​ @greenprisca​ @averyhotchner​ 

#dom!spencer #smut #spencer x you #spencer x reader #spencer reid #spencer reid smut #spencer reid x reader #cheating

[battlemastercoffeeco]

Fennec hungy; Garsa protecc

• the squad are comfortable taking Din to Garsa to feed

○ prior to Bobannec admitting to each other that they weren't human, Garsa had been helping Fennec with her own feeding

○ Fennec goes to Garsa for some clean blackmarket blood with no questions asked

○ "you think i don't recognize Cambion when I meet them? those teeth aren't exactly subtle if you know what you're looking at. I'll set up some volunteers and a guaranteed clean bloodbank."

• Taking Din to the palace medical droid: well that's a malnourished definitely-not-a-human but idk i thought i told you to feed him more

○ food doesn't work

• Taking Din to Garsa: my sweet idiots. my darlings. please take this boy home and fuck him senseless and then bring him back here to be fucked more.

○ she ABSOLUTELY WOULD say it that way tho

○ the droid 💯 has no idea what Din is bc Din's Cubi traits are so stunted, the poor baby 🥺🖤

○ Garsa has a lot of knowledge abt species bc she's an equal opportunity employer

§ didn't recognize Din as Cubi bc he's always always /always/ wearing his armor over so many layers, so he looks bulkier.

§ notices that he starts spending more time at her place as his partners withdraw

§ notices how exhausted he is, how he falls asleep on the couch in her office

§ the whole thing comes out and she /loses her shit/ abt how malnourished he is

□ Din always feels better after visiting Garsa

® he writes it off as time with a friend or whatever

® its bc the ambient energy + ppl paying attention to him, even non-sexually.

§ she notices something's wrong but she doesn't realize /what/ it is until they come to her in desperation because the medical droid couldn't help them.

□ Once she sees him with his armour off she's PISSED

□ (but also deeply deeply guilty that she didn't pick up on it either, even knowing she couldn't have)

• Garsa's furious when she sees how thin Din is when she finally sees him out of armour.

○ And then she's just heartbroken for him when Boba points out that in their defence, as much weight as Din's lost since they started withdrawing, he still looks better than he did when they all got together

• originally Garsa thinks he's just touch starved so she goes out of her way to sit next to him on the couch and let him lean against her or fall asleep in her lap. the armor is uncomfortable and heavy but she doesn't mind if it helps Din. if she has to go out and about she drags him along with a hand tucked into his elbow and they walk around like victorian-era couples. he always seems so much better after visiting, more rested and happier tho still a bit down.

• 🥺🥺🥺 He gets easy affection from her and it's hardly enough but it makes him feel so much better when his mates are starting to withdraw. He just doesn't think much of it because.... Well, he's been lonely, of course he feels better after having a nice time with a friend

• Garsa taking Din aside to gently coax him into conversations that address his exhaustion, the fact he's spending more time at her sanctuary as his partners withdraw

○ he's reticent, but he lets her force him on their walks arm-in-arm

○ she is so patient with his quiet sadness

○ and the worst part ? Din /gets it/, he knows that they're busy doing important stuff. he's trying so hard not to be a uselessly needy clingy burden. but he misses them /so much/ and it /hurts/ and he's so tired even tho he's not the one really /doing/ anything

Extra point from darling @aziriel :

• I can also picture Garsa knowing what Din is, but not knowing that NONE of them know. And her just sideeyeing all of them and taking Din away privately to ask why he's being starved and if he needs help. Or conversely to just start yelling at the others for starving him.

#outline #monsterfucker au #cubi din #vampire fennec #Garsa #horngry din #noms #(s)inspiration

[wistfulrat]

a 4-part rec list of my fave drarry fics - the thrillers, dramas, soft bois, and wankbanks getting me through 2020′s shitstorm

[ for my fellow fledgling drarry stans! the drama list is here and, well. like i didn’t initially intend to go off in the mini-reviews beneath every rec but it’s just that you can't nOT yell about drarry as classic literary foils!! also it’s my dumb sideblog so i decided there are no rules and i get to be annoying about good writing.

but rly, the whole premise of the drarry pairing is shaped by this genre and if the ~serious world of serious published writers~ weren’t absolute cowards, they would admit that drama fic authors have contributed more to the genre than the average shit you can find at your local chain bookstore. so that's that on thAT. & if you love a fic here, don't forget to follow the authors, leave kudos & comments on their work, send them nice msgs bc they do all this shit for free xoxo ]

part 2: dramas

mood: for when I need emotional catharsis and maybe 7 hours to sob/brood about loneliness, the cost of love, & the perpetual fear of being truly known

includes: angst, hurt/comfort, reconciliation fics. it’s cruelty o’clock folks and someone is about to say/do something Fucked Up that they can’t take back. but don’t worry!! there will be a Reckoning feat. hamlet-worthy monologues, ugly truths, unbridled rage, trauma, insecurity, and just a fuck ton of tears!! but maybe even tender apologies and mended things.

(Un)wanted by @aibidil​ - 36k - E | Ginny's pregnant, then she's not and Harry's single. Harry, again with no family, doesn't know what to do with this turn of events, or how to find a new life—post-war, post-Ginny, post-abortion—in which he belongs. He doesn't expect that life to include dancing to the Backstreet Boys with Hermione and Draco Malfoy. A story of finding belonging in the unexpected. | --- can a fic be tender and unflinching at the same time? bc this story strikes that balance rly well and for a piece about unwantedness, it is incredibly humanizing. ginny holding her own, draco being gentle but not letting harry play victim, hermione calling harry “hazzah” and just the way this friendship insists on the validity of found families even when harry is spiraling?? and you’re forced to consider that no one has the monopoly on fucked-upness and that doesn’t absolve us of the ways we hurt each other but it means that everyone has the same potential to be better after being broken. goD JUST READ IT, OKAY.

Blood Magic, the series by @houseofhebrideanblacks and @thestralsofspinnersend 335k - E “Later that night. . .Draco wondered at the depths of magic, its breadth and scope. The ways in which life pervades and eludes death, the ways in which they endure all manners of small and large deaths within their lives.” -- if you don't read any other fic on this list, i hope you read this series bc holy shit it’s breathtaking. harry’s a recovering addict, draco’s recovering from abuse, and in a cottage within the forbidden forest begins an unlikely partnership as the boys take up the tedious work of healing. there are thestrals and everyone's in therapy. there are whole chapters of cottagecore drarry. it's a beautiful exploration of how we bare the immensity of loss against the miracles of birth and regrowth. 

Ship of Theseus by GallaPlacidia - 18k - T “A ship in a full sail, a ship in a state of decay, a ship that had been rebuilt, slightly different. A repeating cycle. “What makes the ship the same?” asked Harry. “I don’t know. There must be something in it that lasts across the changes.” -- DO YOU KNOW HOW THIS QUOTE LIVES RENT FREE IN MY SAD, SAD BRAIN. DO YOU KNOW HOW I LOSE SLEEP THINKING ABOUT THE FUCKING SHIP OF THESEUS. it’s a memory loss fic and everything is so unFAIR. you want to murder harry sometimes bc he’s such a shiT and you suffer through the ways he questions desire, penance, redemption, true love. and by the end, you want to believe in those golden slumber lyrics: “once, there was a way to get back home” 

Yours to Keep by @dracoismytrashson​ - 135k - E i love the university setting, i love getting to see harry and draco’s first forays into a real LGBTQ community, the class and race structures outside of the wizarding world. i love that this is the context in which they’re allowed to confront the shittiness of PTSD, anxiety, depression etc. as they come together and fall apart against each other’s traumas. it makes the ending feel earned af. “Baby, we’ve been easing into it for a decade.” -- my god this line

Away Childish Things by @letteredlettered​ - 153k - T  this fic is devastating. like, completely forget whatever reticence you might have towards a de-aging fic and read this. the de-aging premise allows the author to cut through the ways harry and draco hold each other at a distance and you end up with these stunning moments of clarity where they’re truly seeing each other for the first time. and suddenly everything makes sense. i won't spoil it here but there’s a scene towards the end where harry is talking to hermione and ron about realizing the first time he felt what its like to be loved and I fucking SOBBED. an all-time fave fic about learning how to belong.

Had To Be You by @lettersbyelise​​ - 59k - E a genuinely excellent slow burn about absolute fucking morons who refuse to express their mutual love over the course of literal years?? HOW MANY TENDER MEET-CUTES DO 2 GAY IDIOTS EVEN NEED. a car ride a bookshop a street corner -- when harry met sally is my enemy. but you know what? this fic is masterfully written, it’s an epic tale of unexpected friendships and the inability to say the things we feel. also its very much also a soft boi fic if not for the Major Fuck Up that pushes it into drama territory for me. so worth the turmoil tbh.

Hurricane by phrynne - 120k - E auror partners terrified of love. it’s a fic about walls - where the emotional landscape of this fic is occluded by dishonest words so you feel the tension play out in hollow voices, shuttered looks, emptied eyes. it’s like watching two ppl get flayed alive in slow motion and everything is SHIT for a little. it’s mean, it’s ugly, it doesn’t let you give the characters an out when they’re being cruel - to each other and to themselves. but harry and draco are two violent forces hurling toward each other’s walls and the inevitable reckoning comes and it’s so very worth the ending. the hospital bed scene to rule all hospital bed scenes.

Returning Tides by @zigster-ao3​ - E  “Is my timing that flawed? Our respect run so dry? Yet there's still this appeal That we've kept through our lives” --those fuCKing ian curtis lyrics in the summary!! p a i n. why do i put myself through getting-back-together fics knowing full well i’m gonna be Sad As Hell during the not-together portion of the story?? we are all unfortunately hoes for heartache. anyway this fic is beautiful. draco’s a dad and recently widowed, harry has a thestral reserve, the settings here are stunning. a story about grief and love that lingers.

A Piercing Comfort by @talithan - 44k - T “There is no objective scorecard. There isn’t anything that a person does that tips the balance from ‘deserving’ to ‘undeserving’, or vice versa. A ‘deserving’ person will not run out of worthiness after a set time of happiness and have to then go about working to deserve it again. And an ‘undeserving’ person does not have to suffer at length before having the opportunity to be ‘deserving’.” -- the heart of this fic. harry’s in therapy, facing depression, and learning how to accept love he doesn’t think he deserves. (also draco is harry’s therapist but yes, that power dynamic is handled ethically-well imo and addressed in the author notes I promise!!).

Borrowing Courage by @xx-thedarklord-xx​ - 70k - E |After years of being a Magical Artist and painting for other people, Draco decides it’s time to paint for himself for once. The secrets pile up as he tries to unravel the mystery of his relatives but the only thing he didn’t count on was having to go to Potter of all people for approval.| --god i love this fic. the thing about drarry here is that they never mean to hurt each other but they do. they do and draco’s trying to do the right thing and he wants so badly for good family but harry’s never rly stopped grieving sirius and it’s this whole unintended mess of festering wounds forced to heal. everyone needs a hug. also ron/blaise pairing and ron+draco’s friendship here is everything!!

Reparations and the sequel, Foundations by Saras_Girl - 320k - E | Harry is about to discover that the steepest learning curve comes after Healer training, and that second chances can be found in unexpected places.| -- incredible. harry and draco’s dynamic as healers, the cast of original characters, the boys learning what it means to trust each other, draco building a rehabilitation center, harry falling in love with him, and “meus fabula est mei ut dico: my story is mine to tell.”  i cry

The Ties that Bind by phoenix_writing (not on ao3) - 61k - T | Upon Andromeda’s death, Harry and Draco are given custody of Teddy. Their lives will never be the same.| -- harry’s got major abandonment issues and he’s just trying to be a good co-parent with draco but everyone is being the woRST and you want to murder them on behalf of harry. but then, the boys learn to listen to each other and god it all becomes so tender. also harry has a gay panic. things are awful but it all works out. -

[part 1: thrillers | part 2: dramas | part 3: soft bois | part 4: wankbanks]

#drarry #drarry fic #drarry fic rec #drarry dramas #im so sorry if this got long but also #I have too many Thoughts #all I do is cry over two sad gays #its pain o'clock sweeties #time to Sob about the mortifying ordeal of being Known

[ayatosmlktea]

best boyfriend series | bokuto

A/N: thank you very much bri for making this banner after I gave up! We all know bokuto is the worlds best boyfriend, and if you don’t agree I hope this convinces you!

Tags: @bakugoustanaccount @hoekaashi

I got really carried away with the backstory aha oops

‧͙⁺˚*·༓☾　　☽༓·*˚⁺‧͙

- You and bokuto meet your first year of high school, you happen to get stuck together during orientation and you like his talkative extroverted nature

- You end up being in the same homeroom together while you situate yourself in a seat near the back of the class by the window bokuto makes his way over to you and sits down next to you

- You guys shared one other class, science, one of your better subjects and one of his worst, so you spend lots of time helping him understand the work

- The humour flows really well between the two of you, you enjoy his company as much as he enjoys yours and more than once you guys get called out for goofing off too much

- Lots of moments are spent where he’s making you laugh so hard you have to keep it all in and your cheeks burn from how hard you’re smiling

- You guys text each other outside of class, he asks for help doing the english homework which results in you guys calling each other and laughing over him pronouncing the vocabulary

- He finds your laugh the cutest thing he’s ever heard and goes out of his way to make you laugh ever opportunity he has

- He asks you to come to a few of his volleyball practices - to show off obviously- he lives for the praise you give him but you know this so you often tease him for his mistakes just to see him pout although you’re always sure to remind him that he’s talented

- During his games when he nails a really good spike he’ll search you out in the crowd after and seeing you cheer him on excitedly makes him feel like he could play 100 matches and not get tired

- It’s the end of his second year when bokuto begins to realize that he likes you as more than a friend, that the erratic beating of his heart is because he has feelings for you that go deeper than platonic friendship it makes him nervous

- He starts to notice the things he didn’t pay attention to before like the way you bite your bottom lip when you’re deep in concentration or the way your eyes shine when he makes you laugh

- The nervous shy smile you get when he pulls you into him so you don’t get bumped into in crowded spaces

- He’s never gotten jealous over another guy touching you before but Konoha clearly trying to flirt with you sparks something in him to make you his

-Bokuto starts to think about how his life would be if you weren’t in it and comes to the realization that you’re different from his other friends, he sees you as something more but he’s scared to ruin the relationship you have and doesn’t think you would ever think of him that way

- Spends the entire summer thinking about being in a relationship with you and there were many times he hyped himself up to text you and tell you but every time he backed out

- He doesn’t think you’re in his league, especially when you showed up on the first day of your third year looking like an absolute goddess, you guys hadn’t hung out at all that summer and he almost didn’t recognize you

- Your smile is different than before, it makes his whole body tingle with nervous excitement, its brighter like you’ve become more confident in yourself and he can see why

- He thinks you’re absolutely radiant

‧͙⁺˚*·༓☾　　☽༓·*˚⁺‧͙

- The day he asks you out comes when you’ve stayed late after school to work on a project

- You both finish at the same time, he insists on walking you home like he’s always done before

- You hadn’t planned on leaving this late and were met with a cold wind upon exiting the building

- Bokuto quickly bounded up to you offering you his volleyball jacket which you gladly took without a second thought, it was something you’d done a hundred times before but this time had Bokuto wishing that he could grab your small hand in his and pull you in for a kiss

- “Bo? You good?” you inquire waving your hand in front of his face calling his attention back to the present

- You notice that he’s fidgeting more than usual and he looks ..kinda constipated

- You were no stranger to calling Bokuto out when he started getting weird and in his head so you stopped walking and turned to face him telling him to spill whatever was on his mind

- Bokuto’s eyes widen clearly not expecting to have been called out so soon, you can see the uncharacteristic indecisiveness swimming in his eyes and it makes you start to feel uneasy

- You were expecting him to say something about not wanting to be friends anymore, you knew you had changed over the summer and maybe he didn’t like who you were now

- What you weren’t expecting was for him to practically scream a confession at you

- When he was done you both stared at each other, you not knowing what to say and in shock at the fact that the guy you’ve had a crush on for 3 years has confessed that he feels the same way you do

- Your silence is his eyes indicates rejection and he feels as though he’s been kicked in the gut but he tells you to forget what he said and shoves his hands in his sweater pockets mentally berating himself for being stupid enough to think you would like him back

- You reach out and grab his elbow stopping him from walking away, you don’t say anything and instead stand on your tiptoes to place the softest kiss on his lips

- Both of your faces heat up but neither of you move away from each other, you whisper that you like him too and have liked him for years and he can’t help but laugh in relief

- He pulls you into a hug and spins you around before holding your face in both his warm hands and kisses you again making your headspin and your heart race

- The next day all your friends are relieved when you show up to school holding hands claiming that watching the two of you pine over each other so obviously and not doing anything about it was painful

- Bokuto as your boyfriend!!!! finally

- Bokuto is your #1 hype man, for everything

- Doesn’t matter how big or small it is he’s always happy when you succeed

- Every time you post a selfie on instagram he’s always the first one to comment in all caps exclaiming how beautiful you look

- Also the kind of boyfriend to make you stop when you guys go out so he can a bunch of pictures of you, tells you to pose, tells you how pretty you look with the sun making your skin and eyes pop

- He kisses you every chance he gets, just peppers your face with kisses because his heart is overflowing with so much love for you that he doesn’t know what to do with himself other than to express it through kissing you

- Loves skin to skin contact, when you’re lying in bed together he’ll lift your shirt up and press your back against his chest with his arms cuddling your stomach

- Screenshots every snapchat you send him, even the ones you think are ugly because he thinks you always look beautiful especially when you’re being dorky

- He loves going for hikes, being the active person that he is he’d def be down for a lot of outdoor activities

- Kuroo still has the pictures on his phone from when you all went down to the lake for the weekend and Bokuto tipped your kayak over. At the time you had been anything but happy with your clothes and hair soaking wet but the memory of it now made you chuckle

- Your size difference is his favourite thing about the relationship, you’re so small you barely reach his shoulders and it makes him feel fuzzy inside knowing that only he gets to hold you close against his big beefy chest

- Insists on paying for literally e v e r y t h i n g

- It doesn't matter how much money you make, he always wants to treat you because you’re his baby, don't bother trying to fight with him bc you're going to lose

- Not only can he physically overpower you from being able to read the machine to pass your card but he’ll just pull some shit out like “can’t a guy treat his beautiful girlfriend?”

- If you mention in passing something you’ve been craving like food/candy/snacks etc he’ll go get it for you, if he notices you are looking at something you've been wanting to get yourself for a while but are hesitating bc its too expensive or you don't think you deserve it - you got it, he’s going to buy it for you

- Everyday is valentine’s day for Bokuto so there’s never a day you don’t feel loved and cherished, he buys you new flowers every week with a cute note attached saying something he loves about you

- On the actual day, he just sees it as an excuse to go all out for you, breakfast in bed, your favourite chocolates and/or candy waiting for you in the kitchen, obviously he’s gonna insist on waking you up with his favourite meal...if you know what I mean

- He insists on picking you up from work when he has the chance, especially if you’re working late

- When he has to leave early for practice he spends the few moments he has between waking up and getting dressed to cuddle you, buries his face in your neck and enjoys the sound of you snoring softly

- Always kisses you goodbye, one on your forehead and one on your lips

- Sends you a good morning text so you wake up to something happy because he knows you get sad when you wake up and he’s gone all day

- If he has to leave the city for a game or something else work related he makes sure his side of the bed smells enough like him that isnt overpowering but is enough for you to hug while he’s gone and have some comfort

- Sends you pictures everyday until he’s back and while you learn to cope with him being gone he nevers sleeps right without you

- He misses you even more than you miss him, he’s a clingy baby and needs your validation that you love him as much as he loves you

- Everyone gets insecure sometimes, including Boktuo and when he’s having one of those days all he wants to do is lie his head down on your chest while you play with hair and cuddle

- Bokuto is the kind of guy who knows he’s going to spend the rest of his life with you, I feel like depending on his mood he’s either antsy to propose or he’s not in a rush because he’s enjoying the lives you two are leading right now

- He’s had the ring he’s going to use to propose to you with for a solid year before it happens

- I also feel like he’d do some shit like pull the ring out while you’re not looking and take a picture to show you on the days leading up to the proposal

- He’ll take you to the beach to watch the sunrise with you and although you’re cranky and complaining that it’s too early to be awake you know the view will be worth it

- What you aren’t expecting is for him to get really serious as the first splashes of blue and pink hit the horizon while he talks about how he never imagined you’d become so important to his life

- He recalls the moment he fell in love with you, it wasn’t anything romantic or particularly cute and it was a little embarrassing now that you think back on it but he remembers the two of you joking around during lunch and him making you laugh so hard you snorted out milk through your nose

- He doesn’t know what it was about that moment but it had stuck with him all these years, he talks about how he wants to spend every morning waking up to you, bed head and morning breath and all

- He thanks you for being so patient with him during his time growing up in high school, he tells you he’s grateful you were there for him when he was feeling the worst about himself

- He starts to choke up as he talks about knowing that he wants the spend the rest of his life with you and that he’ll spend everyday making you the happiest woman alive and making sure you know how loved and appreciated you are

- By the end you’re both crying and when you choke out a yes he grabs you into a tight bear hug and can’t stop smiling the rest of the day

#bokuto x reader #bokuto x you #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu x you #bokuto koutarou #bokuto headcanons #bokuto imagines #haikyuu imagines #haikyuu!! imagines #hq x reader #hq x you #hq headcanons #hq imagines #koutarou x reader #koutarou x you #best boyfriend series

[the-glowup-project]

23 - 1 1 - 2021

I haven't been here in a while and the reason is that the glow up project slipped out of my mind. Sad but true. I completely lost the focus and I had such bad habits I feel guilty about my self. I ate shit and I didn't study. I realized that in this particular moment of my life I am at the lowest I have ever been.

First, I am not taking care of my body. I am clearly gaining weight and I have noticed some stretch marks forming on my hips, my clothes don't fit anymore, my grocery shopping is always filled with fast and unhealthy food.

I am also messing up with university. I still go to classes (and for that I am proud) but I am not studying. It hit hard when I realized I lost so many lessons that I cannot pick up all the work. So I decided to focus on 4 exams, and to leave one for another exam session, I have so much to do that is impossible to score a lot with all the work I have lost. So I prefer studying for 4 exams ( Chinese, English, Italian literature and Chinese philosophy) and to get top grades. Another thing is that I discovered that I won't be able to be an alumna at Collegio Internazionale. I believed that people could be admitted with having top grades at uni, but actually you have to be admitted before finishing high school and you have to take a test in may. So okay, big opportunity right out the window there. The worst part is that a uni mate told me this, and of course he got it. I felt so dumb, for him it was so obvious and I was just the stupid girl sitting next to him.

I am so tired of being the stupid friend, the one that needs explanation from people all the time. I am tired that people have pity for me and don't see how smart I am. I am starting to think that people perceive me as the idiot of the group.

Moreover, I am so done with being the fat and unhealthy friend. A friend of mine from exchange came to visit me for the weekend. She is the girl that everyone wants to be or to be around: she is beautiful, skinny with a killer curvy body, never wears make up because she looks stunning with out it, down to earth, good in university and nice to everybody. Literally every person that meets her likes her immediately and wants to be with her bc she is so cool and every guy wants to hit on her; just to give an example, my housemate's brother came to visit him too so we decided to get drinks together saturday night and he offered to pay for hers, while I was sitting next to her. Also in the house he would never speak to me (too cool for that) but just with my friend.

But that's okay, I am not the jealous friend, I was actually so happy for her... I just felt miserable on my own. I also felt miserable in other times during the weekend. We walked a lot (around 40 km in two days to visit the city) and there were moments when I was extremely tired and had a lot of pain in my body. On the last night of her stay, we had to walk an hour or more under the rain to get back home. I was so in pain that I couldn't keep up with her: she was walking in front of me and sometimes she would stop to wait for me; she would also say things like "I know today we walked a lot, but it feels good!" or "we can stop when YOU want, for me it is okay to walk but I see you are very tired and in pain". I just said "no, that's okay, you can speed up... I don't mind walking alone for a bit". So she was again walking in front of me and I was behind. I couldn't help it so some tears slipped out of my eyes and hit my cheeks. I felt so fat, I wondered how easy it is to walk without all this weight on your feet. How could I be mad? Of course she can't understand how it feels, how painful it is after a long day... she was very nice in her own way, she wanted to comfort me, but

I just felt fat and miserable.

I am so fucking tired of always feeling this way.

[angocanhha]

so if i change my url, does that mean ...

hello, i'm back, second day. good job me. it's tuesday, march 22, 2022, 8:09am. what a moment, if i'm living in the moment. i feel very babbly rn.

i can see the moon fading from my window. it's so nice. it's also interesting how the sun shines on the moon.

the anger in me. i realize have anger. i used to think, when listening to advice on how to deal w anger, i barely ever get angry. but i realize, my annoyances are also a type of anger. when i get irritated or judgemental of how another person acts, like my parents, that can be classified as anger. and so i think i'm quite an angry person. my anger is present almost all the time. it's the stove that keeps the food warm, except this food, doesn't taste that good.

so i'm looking to transform my anger, now that i've recognized it. i'm quite angry w my father. and i feel sad about that. i wish i could be warm and fresh w him. but i hold anger. i can't let it go, yet. i intend to let it go, i would like to heal. is that even possible?

when i was at the monastery, co quyen would say, you can improve your relationship w your parents. i thought, i love my parents, i'm very friendly w them, she obviously doesn't know me. but, maybe she knows a part of me that i won't recognize within myself. or maybe she got lucky and guessed correctly based on her vast living experience. whatever the case, living w my parents, i am facing our connection and time from the past. it lives in the present moment.

i used to be- i used to be upbeat, loving, forgetful/forgiving. i used to be optimistic, naive, impulsive. now, around my parents, i'm just trying to survive. i'm just trying to pace myself, take care of my emotions so i don't explode and need to move out. i've moved out so many times. i've exploded so many times. my mom wants to stay in this house bc it's brought us good luck, but there are blemishes in the walls, the floors cover secret spirits that rise up to the skylight, trying to escape, trying to be released from this realm.

how fortunate i am to have an opportunity to be in despair. my problems, luckily, are first world problems. they are the problems of a global south citizen moved north. but a knife in the body, still hurts, no matter how pretty the handle is. i'm lucky i won't die from this wound, i mean. i'm lucky that there are relatively more resources to heal this wound.

i'm getting back into the filmmaking mindset, this time really trying to commit to acting as 'time runs out.' so many times i've left, and each time i've come back. i don't know what i'm saying anymore. maybe i should read and revise instead.

good luck my love. i know today is another day to go at it. live your best life as deeply as you can. i love u very much, and i am always here w u. i am always cheering u on and comforting u as long as u remember to come back to me. thank u for choosing happiness and well-being. thank u for taking care of yourself, taking breaks, and connecting w the essence of life. have a great day and hopefully, i'll see u tomorrow~

[theguccigoobers]

who is sierra?

My name is Sierra Rivera. I don't really go by any nicknames or anything sorry I know that's pretty lame. I am 18 years old and currently attended SFSU! I grew up in San Francisco my entire life, so I guess you could say I know the routes, ins and outs. All that good stuff. The city is amazing, but being here 18 years kinda sucks because I just do the same things over and over again, and its low-key sad seeing my city being changed after loving it how it was.

Before college I attended John O’Connell High School, pretty much in the heart of the mission district. Even though that wasn’t my first choice, I ended up staying 4 years and loved it so much. I was an active and smart student. I participated in sports such as volleyball, basketball, soccer, and softball. My favorite sports to play were softball and basketball. I played those my entire four years. I was also apart of the student body. My senior year I even became senior class president and pretty much ran everything. I also joined clubs like outdoor club, poetry club, and even band. I was pretty well known considering it was a small school and I think that's what I enjoyed the most.

High school was a great experience, it helped me find what career I wanted to pursue. Even though my High school wasn't well known, it provided me with opportunities that most schools couldn't have. I was in a medical lab, where I got CPR certified and expanded my knowledge in the medical field. I got internships at hospitals, and even flew to DC for a week to learn about global health!

I have hobbies like hanging with friends. drawing, reading, and just being out in nature. I am super kind and considerate but don't get on my bad side bc I also have a lil temper but otherwise im happy and always willing to make friends and try new things! im very outgoing and a fun person to vibe with once we get to know each other better.

I am majoring in nursing because I believe nurses are important in society and in this world, and I feel not many people wanna pursue it because it seems hard or people are lazy. also, my basketball coach helped me realize this career was for me. His name was Keith Norman, he coached me for 3 years. he recently just passed away from leukemia, he was fighting for over a year, but I remember the last thing he told me was to pursue nursing because im kind and I understand people and the world needs nurses like me. so I continue growing my knowledge for him and myself.

thanks for tuning in :)

my first time on a carousel

me on prom

me & my friends @ great america

#AAS218SierraR