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#and then John mulaney left his WIFE for another woman
lowvintagesims · 4 months
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@funkiesims and i saw john mulaney last night and this is the front and back of the shirts we made for the occasion
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harrytheehottie · 22 days
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1000% agree on John mulaney… I used to really enjoy his comedy but I can’t believe how okay so many people were with what he did?? Like not only are you not supposed to make any major life decisions coming out of rehab/recovery (like divorcing your wife and having a baby with another woman) but he just treated Anna so badly and so many people have just forgotten about it and moved on??? The fuck??
Had no idea she was releasing a book though, so happy for her and can’t wait to read it!!
She just announced it yesterday! I’m so excited for it tbh!!!! I think so much of her identity was being his wife and he used that in alllllll of his bits and then when he was done with her he just left her right after something very traumatic (relapsing) and pretended like that part of his life was never there. also, Olivia Munn was waiting in the wings like a freak too. They deserve each other.
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mandaloriangf · 2 years
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watching twitter turn against john mulaney and thinking about how i had people upset with me because i said i felt bad for his ex wife after he publicly left her for another woman lmao
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marlowe1-blog · 3 months
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"Three Stories" (The Stories of John Cheever)
There's a fine line between clever and stupid.
So these are barely stories. More like sketches. And in almost all of them you feel like Cheever is going "aren't I cute?" Two of the stories are "clever" in a way that just feels cloying while the middle story is mysterious in a way that can be intriguing or irritating depending on your bias.
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I. The first story is told from the perspective of a stomach. It's basically a fat guy talking to himself. Only, it's the stomach trying to push its agenda. The stomach is happy to have grown but then went through an irritating time when the man try to get it to shrink.
Basically, you get older and you get fat and unless you want to be obsessive and insane about your weight loss, you might as well just give up and let your waist size get bigger. Sure, you have to buy new pants, but do you really want to NOT eat all the good food?
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II. This one is mysterious since it's about a woman who is married to a man who dies in a car accident. A few years later, she marries another man who ALSO dies in a car accident. There's a great deal of scenes where the town is trying to expand the highway and then trying to save a woman's home.
And people keep dying on the highway. Only someone is shooting the truckers. So is it the woman? Or is it someone else? The woman seems to be pretty blase about the fact that she keeps getting married to guys who die on that highway, but there was no talk about bullets in the first couple of accidents. Either way, she moves away and gets married again and....I don't know?
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III. This one has a twist ending. You think that it's going one place but it's going another place. From the beginning you think it's about an irritating guy who is trying to flirt with a woman who isn't interested. Like she's really not interested. Seriously dude, shut up.
He asks her what she's reading and she won't say. He's telling her pleasant dreams when she falls asleep but she rolls her eyes. Everything he says is a source of annoyance and yet he won't stop.
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Twist ending - they are married. So what looks like a creepy dude trying to hit on a woman is actually a husband trying to talk to his wife. Only his wife is treating him like a stranger who won't shut up.
The twist would be more interesting if this wasn't another story in an endless series of stories about husbands and wives who hate each other. Like the entirety of 20th century marriage humor seemed to be "fuck my wife" (or take my wife...please) and there's a reason why fans felt so betrayed when John Mulaney left his wife. He wrote a lot of jokes about how much he loved her and was crazy about her so it was refreshing not to have the standard borscht belt jokes about shrew wives.
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So here, our sympathy is to the woman who has to put up with this guy until Cheever outright tells us that she married him. Then we are supposed to think that she's a shrew and he's just a sad sack. Whatever.
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them-jules · 3 years
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Do you ever just fall in too a pit of existentialism and realize how horrible the world is?
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bubblewrapjunkie · 3 years
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i swore i wasn’t gonna do this but this whole website is full of confused clowns who has never had a grown up relationship in their life so here we go.
the majority of the posts about john mulaney and olivia munn expecting a child fall into a very weird pattern. the tone is basically “oh so your parasocial crush john mulaney disappointed you boohoo what have we learned now?”, the moral of the story being that you shouldn’t idealize famous people. fair enough, that’s a a reasonable point to make on its own. the problem arise when you apply that particular lesson to this particular situation because here’s the kicker: he hasn’t done anything wrong. 
“but he left his wife!! he said he was in love with her and then he left and he got a new girlfriend and now they’re having a kid even though he said he didn’t want kids!!”. none of this is morally wrong. if he wasn’t in love with his wife anymore, he did the right thing by divorcing her. if he fell in love with another person and wanted to be with her, he did the right thing by doing so. it’s that easy.
sometimes tumblr seems to operate under the assumption that whenever another person is hurt, it must mean that someone else did something wrong, something vicious and most importantly, with mailce. that’s not how interpersonal relationships work. people fall in love, fall out of love, divorce, want different things in life with different people without ever being morally wrong. that means things can get messy and people can get hurt and hearts can be broken without villains, without ill intent. we are human beings with human feelings and it is impossible to live a life in which you’ll never hurt anyone else. 
the problem isn’t (for now) that people put john mulaney on a pedestal - the problem is that people seem to genuinely think that getting a divorce is reason enough for someone to fall from said pedestal?? i don’t want to make this about purity culture, but i find it somewhat telling that the same website that was ready to fully cancel jeff goldblum for marrying a very much grown up woman (31) simply because of an age gap also seems to have “trouble” with john’s “choices”. not to be all go out and touch some grass on main, but please believe me when i say that you can fall out of love with someone and feel bad about it and still leave them in the end because that’s simply how life works.
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imaginesbymonika · 4 years
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“Until they discover what a mess I truly am.”
Pairing: Pete Davidson x reader
Warnings: Angst, mentions of depression, fluff at the end
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As a writer for SNL Y/N knew a bunch of famous people, she worked with almost everyone since she had started in 2013. The young woman began writing at the age of 17, being the youngest female writer in Saturday Night Live history. On the one hand, it was super fun, the thrill of working among people such as Seth Meyers or Lorne Michaels filled her with pride. At the same time, it was intimidating and occasionally mentally exhausting. It felt like she frequently had to prove herself to everyone, prove that she was worthy of being a writer for SNL at such a young age. She constantly had to work twice as hard.
The first person that looked at Y/N as an equal writer was John Mulaney. John treated her like an adult and whenever she happened to be in the writers' room with him, he always wanted to hear her ideas and opinions on scripts and previous shows.
He explained that he saw a piece of himself in her, and he knew exactly how tough the first year could be without having at least one friend.
To this day still, Y/N was incredibly grateful for him.
Over the years she had met a lot of writers, some of them grabbing her attention more than others. But at the end of the day, none of them seemed to be 'dateable'. John always wanted to set her up with one of his friends, but she always declined saying he was her friend, not her dating service. Until Y/N met Pete Davidson.
„Sorry, I’m late.“, he announced after entering the writers' room. He sat down on the opposite side of Y/N and flashed her a quick smile, before leaning back in his chair.
„I saw how you stared at Pete this morning.“, John later said as the two left the SNL building. She simply rolled her eyes and turned her head away from her friend, humiliated that her cheeks were burning up.
The very first-time Y/N realized she had developed quite the crush on Pete was after his proposal announcement.
He held up Ariana’s hand, while a huge smile played on his lips: “WE‘RE GETTING MARRIED!“. She could see the little tattoo behind his ear and sighed.
She could feel her heart breaking, but when his eyes met hers, Y/N smiled softly and nodded her head at him. Forming the word „Congrats“ with her lips.
From that moment on, she tried her best to get over him. Dating guys and having one night stands- Y/N did everything to keep Pete of her mind. She hardly saw him, during the time of his engagement, which was a miracle. But after the engagement was canceled, he was around more often. They sometimes made eye contact in the writers' room or at an after-show party. But Y/N kept her distance, knowing that once they would start talking again- her old feelings would resurface.
„Pete asked about you again.“, John explains while handing her a cup of coffee. „Thank you.“. Making her snap out of her thoughts: “Are you alright?“.
She simply nods: “Yeah, I’m fine.“.
„Did you hear what I said? Pete-.“.
„Yeah, I heard you.“, Y/N interrupts him, a bit more cold than she intended. She takes a sip before looking at her old friend apologetic: “John, you know how I feel about Pete- I don’t want to get my hopes up. He’s out there dating these supermodels, I just don’t-“, she pauses for a second: “I just don’t fit into that picture.“.
John, confused and a bit overwhelmed by her words swallows thickly: “Okay, wow. I never expected you to think that little of yourself-.“.
„Pete’s too good for me. Hell, he’s too good for anyone, really.“, she explains: “Let’s not talk about him. Please.”.
„That’s exactly what he said about her.“, Anna, John's wife, exclaims after Y/N left their apartment: “We need to do something about this mess.“.
„I don’t know.“, Pete says, holding a cigarette in his hand: “I mean, it’s not like I don’t find Y/N attractive... she’s really pretty, but I feel like she deserves more- better than this.“. He makes a hand gesture, pointing at himself.
„But Pete-.“.
„Look, I appreciate your concerns but - it’s always the same. I like a girl, we date then she gets to know the real me- like the real me. You know how fucked up I am. She breaks up with me.“, Pete explains: “And I don’t know, I can get it when they’re famous- like Ariana or Kaia...but a normal girl like Y/N? That would probably break my heart.“.
Anna and John exchange a look.
Y/N who walks into her office turns on the lights. One hour earlier she received a weird text message from John saying:
Sorry to text you this late, there’s some trouble at the office considering the sketch for tomorrow. Would be great if you could go there, rehearse it and look it over. Anna and I have our date night, so it would be you with another writer. Thanks. Love you.
„Hello-?“, a voice asks and Y/N lets out a high-pitched scream. She quickly turns around and sees Pete Davidson standing in the door frame.
„Oh my god, Pete.“, she says and runs a hand down her face. She can hear how he chuckles slightly. “You scared the living shit out of me. Don’t ever do that again!“.
„What? Say hello?“, he smiles and Y/N just rolls her eyes in response.
„I guess, it’s just you and me.“, Y/N points out and hopes that John was mentally preparing himself for what’s going to happen the next time they see each other again: “John said there’s some sort of Sketch, waiting here...but I can’t find one.“
„John texted you too?“, Y/N asks and her eyes widen: “Maybe he made a mistake?“.
„Nah, I don’t think so.“.
An awkward silence falls upon the two and after a few seconds Y/N walks over to her computer: “Maybe he sent me the script via E-Mail, let me check.“. Meanwhile, Pete sits down on the little couch and watches her.
„You should get a bigger couch.“, he exclaims and when Y/N looks up from the screen, he smiles at her. It makes her cheek blush and she quickly hides her face beneath the computer.
„Now... how’s life treating you?“, Pete asks and lays down, he stares at the ceiling.
Y/N sighs: “It’s okay, I guess. What about you? I heard you’re currently dating this actress. Kate. How’s that working out?”.
„No.“, he replies: “I’m not, we- well, she broke up with me a month later. I feel like they all think I’m a great guy until they date me and discover what a mess I truly am. Or maybe it’s the fact that Ariana said my dick is huge so- they want to check that out themselves. I don’t know.”.
The young woman stops typing and looks at Pete again, she leans back in her chair: “I hope you know, that’s not true.”.
“How do you know? I never showed you my dick. Or did I? If I-.”.
“Pete, you’re not a mess, you just have some mental health issues. If these women can’t 'handle' you that’s not your problem but theirs. You are a great guy and every girl would be lucky to have you by their side... I can’t seem to find an email, I’ll call John.“.She gets up from her chair and leaves the room: “I’ll get myself a cup of coffee afterward, you want some?.“.
Pete, speechless by her words slowly sits up straight on the couch. He never expected someone to say something so kind about him. He gets up and leaves the room. At the end of the hallway stands Y/N, slightly slapping the coffee machine.
„I can’t reach John, and this stupid machine isn’t working-.“, she says, frustration audible in her voice.
„Did you mean what you just said?“,he asks and Y/N looks up.
She stares at him for a few seconds: “Yeah, why-?“.
„This might sound ridiculous.”, he starts, crosses his arms, and leans against the wall:” But... did John talked to you about asking me out for a date?”.
As soon as the words leave his mouth the color on Y/N’s face disappears. She can feel how her mouth runs dry and her hands start to sweat.
“Because he talked to me about asking you out. And-.”.
“What did you say to him?”.
He wrinkles his forehead:” Of course, I said no.”.
“Oh.”.
Y/N can feel it. She can feel how her heart is breaking in ways she didn’t know were possible. If dying of a broken heart was a real thing, maybe now it would happen to her.
“Of course.”, she repeats his words and scratches her eyebrow.
“Yeah, I mean- you wouldn’t date me either. That’s probably what you told John.”, Pete chuckles but stops when he sees Y/N’s facial expression. His eyes widen:” Shit, no.”, he says, almost like a whisper.
Y/N rushes past him into her office before the tears are falling. She didn’t care. Not now.
“Y/N- I...”, he starts but the girl shakes her head.
“Go Home, Pete. I’ll call John and tell him I didn’t find the script.”.
“I just assumed we were on the same page.”, he says, ignoring what she just said:” Like, look at you and look at me- I’m too much of a jerk for someone like you!”.
“Excuse me?“, she replies, her voice growing louder with every second passing: “Since when do you decide what’s best for me?“.
„I don’t want you to get hurt, I’m difficult. Fuck, Y/N, you know that. We’ve been working together for such a long time now. If we would get together, I don’t know if I could survive you thinking the same way these girls think about me now.“.
Y/N sighs and crosses her arms in front of her chest, as if she was trying to protect the last bit of her heart: “You’re right, we shouldn’t get together.“.
„W-what?“.
„Pete.“, she slowly takes his hand, her voice breaking: “You need to work on your mental health, you can’t just jump from one relationship into the next. That’s unhealthy. But... I will help you. I will be there for you until you’re truly ready to date again.“.
A soft smile spreads on his lips: “That sounds good.“, he leans down: “One kiss, though?“.
„Sure.“, she replies:” You can get more than one..”.And when their lips meet, it feels better than she could have ever imagined.
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crocgirl420 · 3 years
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Just realized the reason I’m so completely unphased by all the John Mulaney stuff is because my dad also cheated of his wife and then left to go start a new family with another woman. I’ve accepted this is just what men, ESPECIALLY men you like, do a long time ago
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The Second Check-In
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Part 12 of Seventy Percent
Series Summary: When you left on your trip to Vegas, you’d planned on letting loose for one last weekend before heading back to reality and getting your affairs in order so your best friend wouldn’t be left cleaning up your mess when your cancer finally ended your life. What you hadn’t counted on was waking up married to a celebrity who has a knight-in-shining-armor complex, connections with an oncologist, and amazing insurance…
Chapter Summary: You and Sebastian discuss how to handle dealing with the press and media now that word is out that he’s married, then you go to the second-check in and see how your tumor is doing.
Word Count: 2,644
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The picture that was taken when you were getting into the car showed half of your face and it was splashed everywhere. It seemed like the entire world wanted to know who Sebastian Stan’s mystery wife was. You’d decided it was probably best if he didn’t take you to the hospital on Monday and he’d reluctantly agreed. So, while you enjoyed your anonymity a little longer, he had a video conference with his agent and PR team.
As you got ready to leave after your infusion, a nurse stopped you and let you know that Dr. Chowdhury wanted to see you before you left.
“I am an old man, but I do have grandkids,” he started off. It was an odd beginning to a conversation between a doctor and his patient, but your life was one whole jumble of weird, so you shrugged it off. “So I see the headlines sometime, and, if I’m not mistaken, the man who comes in with you so often has been hitting headlines lately. Or, rather, you have been.”
“Where are you going with this?”
“You don’t need to worry about the hospital staff. Patient confidentiality, you know. But the other patients are not bound by the rules we are. I do not want to cause any undue stress, but it is imperative to your treatment that you remain in a positive frame of mind. So I was wondering if you would prefer we move you to a private room while you are here.”
“I—that’d probably be smart.”
He nodded and made a note in your chart. “Good. Also, tomorrow we’ll run you through some more scans. I want to see the progress this new medication is making.”
“What if—” You really didn’t want to know the answer to this question, but you needed to ask it anyway. “What if there hasn’t been any progress? What if the tumor just won’t shrink?”
“We have one more course of action we can take should it come to that. We aren’t giving up on you, Y/N. Don’t give up on us just yet.”
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“This journalist said they like my hair,” you mentioned conversationally as Sebastian puttered around the kitchen, making dinner.
“It’s good hair.”
“It is good hair, isn’t it? I’m glad neither of my treatments caused hair loss.”
Besides the photo that leaked from the Vegas wedding and the one from the diner, no other pictures or new information had come to light. So far, you hadn’t seen any outright negativity in the news regarding you or Sebastian. Mostly because the headlines were focused on you as a Mystery Woman. As soon as the veil lifted and the truth came to light, you were sure things would turn ugly. But for now, you would enjoy the neutrality.
“You haven’t read any comments, have you?”
“Nope. I promised I wouldn’t and, as Dr. Chowdhury said today, it is imperative that I maintain a positive attitude for my treatment to work,” you said, trying your best to match his Indian accent. However, much like your aptitude for foreign languages, you were downright dismal at accents.
“You talked to Dr. Chowdhury?”
“Yeah.” You set down your phone and waited until Seb looked at you. “Can you come with me tomorrow? We’re running scans and he’s gonna let me know if this treatment is actually shrinking the tumor. I don’t think it’s a good idea for me to go alone, considering how I reacted last time.”
“Of course,” he said without hesitation. “What time’s the appointment?”
“Two. I know you’re going on some talk shows here in the city this week. Will that work for you?”
He nodded. “I’m going on Late Night with Seth tomorrow. Should have enough time.” Sebastian checked on the soup on the stove before rounding the island and taking a seat next to you. “Speaking of… Have you thought any more about what you’re comfortable with me talking about on TV?”
“A little. As much as I’d love for you to veto all questions about me, I think your PR team is right. You probably should acknowledge the elephant.”
“Are you calling yourself fat?” He gasped in fake offense.
“Elephant in the room, you idiot.”
“I’m your idiot, though.”
Okay, so you knew you were technically married to the man, but it still felt wrong to feel butterflies in your stomach when he teased you like that.
Friends. That’s all you were in actuality.
“And as my idiot,” you kept it going, ignoring how much you loved saying those words, “I think you should definitely acknowledge that you’re married. I don’t think I’m comfortable with my name being out there, though.”
He nodded. “I figured that. And I agree.”
“Part of me wants to play it safe and pretend like we’ve known each other for a while. Like, long-distance relationship thing. But another part of me hates the lie. And also, as someone who grew up on Harry Potter fanfiction, this accidental marriage trope would just be eaten up by your fans.”
“Which means we’d probably stay in the spotlight longer,” he pointed out.
“Yeah. And you’d have to explain why we stayed married. Mentioning that your wife has cancer is kind of a downer for a talk show like Seth’s.”
Wife. Rather than think about how the word applied to you, you chose to replay the John Mulaney segment in your head as a nice distraction from those damn butterflies in your stomach.
That’s my WIFE!
“Do you feel comfortable with me telling everyone you have cancer?” He asked.
At some point during this conversation, you’d grabbed his hand and were now playing with his fingers. You kept your eyes on where your fingers were massaging his as you contemplated the question. It was the only one you hadn’t come to conclusion about before now.
“I don’t know…”
“Think out loud. Maybe I can help.”
“Okay, so, on one hand, if you mention I have cancer, that would be a great time to ask for privacy. You know. Play the pity card. Say how I’m going through treatment and the stress would make it harder for me. Which is the truth.”
“On the other hand…” he prompted.
“If you leave that part out I might seem less interesting and the spotlight might move on faster, you know? And I’m a private person, as you know.”
He grinned. “Oh, yes. I remember, Y/N no-middle-name Y/L/N.”
His reminder of the first day you were in the city made you laugh. It seemed like an entire lifetime ago. If only you’d known that you would be putting your entire life in his hands less than two days later…
“You know what? I trust you, Seb. The only hard line I’m drawing is my name. I want to keep that out of the light as long as I can. For the rest… you’re better at this publicity thing than I am. You’ve talked to your PR team. I trust your judgment.”
“That’s so sweet,” he cooed, freeing one of his hands to wipe away imaginary tears. “You’re making me cry, Y/N.”
“Oh, shut the fuck up and check on the soup.”
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“You asked me to be here so—”
“If I’d known you’d be so annoying I wouldn’t ha—”
“Just give me your fucking hand, dammit. I’m trying to be supportive!” Sebastian scooted his chair over and grabbed both of your hands out of your lap, gripping them on the armrest victoriously. “Now I have both of your hands. Whatchu gonna do ‘bout that, huh sweetheart?”
Glare at him, was your answer, though the shock of the new pet name dampened the fire behind it. It was a few minutes after two ‘o clock and you were waiting in Dr. Chowdhury’s office. A nurse let you know he’d be a few minutes late which immediately made your blood pressure skyrocket.
And that’s how you found yourself arguing with Sebastian about him holding your hand.
You huffed, but shifted in the seat so you could more comfortably keep your hands in his.
“Glad to see you two getting along so well,” an amused British accent you hadn’t heard in a few weeks said, alerting you to her presence in the room.
“Helen!” Seb released your hands for long enough to stand, give her a hug, and shake Dr. Chowdhury’s hand before sitting back down and expectantly putting his hands on the armrest of your chair. Neither doctor said anything as you stared down your husband. It was only when he quirked his eyebrow that you sighed and gave him your hands again.
“Sorry ‘bout that. He’s trying to become the personification of the phrase way too over-supportive,” you shot both doctors a tolerant grin.
“There is no such thing when it comes to treatment,” Dr. Sharpe said, grinning as she sat next to Dr. Chowdhury behind his desk.
“Told you,” Seb muttered to you.
“Shut up, the adults are talking,” you whispered back. To the doctors, you said, “So, I don’t know whether to be scared or happy that both of you are here.”
“We are seeing progress, Y/N,” Dr. Chowdhury said simply.
“Progress,” you repeated softly. The word felt foreign in your mouth.
“What does that mean?” Seb asked, squeezing your fingers.
Dr. Chowdhury sat forward, clasped hands resting on his desk. “It means that your scans showed that the tumor is shrinking. Slower than we would have hoped, but it is shrinking.”
“And before you say anything,” Dr. Sharpe broke in, “It is enough. While the progress is slower than we planned for, we both agree that if it continues like this, the tumor should grow small enough to remove it. It just might take longer than we planned for.”
“It’s shrinking,” you whispered, still processing this good news. Despite your better mood, you’d still been expecting bad news when you came in.
“It’s shrinking,” Dr. Chowdhury confirmed, smiling.
This treatment was working. There was progress. It was shrinking.
“How much longer do you think it will take?” Seb asked.
Dr. Chowdhury nodded his approval of the question. “That is why both Helen and I are here today. You have a decision to make and we are both of different minds. As you know, I have kept Dr. Sharpe appraised of your progress during this study. We have conferred frequently, so though this is my study, her opinion is very much valid. And both options are medically sound.”
You nodded, ready to listen.
Dr. Chowdhury went first. “I would like to adjust your infusion cocktail one more time. This approach is quite aggressive, but my hope is that the tumor will begin to shrink more rapidly and you can have your surgery at the time we originally planned for.”
“I believe,” Dr. Sharpe took over the conversation at this point, “That it would be best to continue your infusions as they are. We estimate you will have to continue treatment for a month longer, at least, before surgery. But the progress you’ve made in the last week is promising, and you will not have to go through another period of adjusting to the new medication.”
“Option one is a more aggressive treatment plan that would keep us on schedule, and option two is to continue on with the current treatment and wait longer for the surgery?” Sebastian summarized. Both doctors nodded.
“One concern my doctor back home had about more aggressive treatment options was that my body would be too weak for surgery.” You looked at Dr. Chowdhury. “Is that a concern with the more aggressive treatment?”
“It is always a concern. One that I have considered. With how you’ve responded to the increased dosage over the last two weeks, I believe that you will not have to worry about being too weak for surgery. However, if I am wrong about that, there are a few courses of action I have in mind that would help so you can still have the surgery.”
You and Sebastian asked questions for a few more minutes until you felt you had enough information to continue the discussion alone. Since this decision wasn’t as time-pressing as the decision to begin treatment had been, Dr. Chowdhury suggested you two go home and come back the next day with your decision.
Before heading back to the apartment, Sebastian had Sean, your driver, drop you two off at the grocery store. There were a few things you both needed and, for the first time in a while, you felt up to walking around for a bit. So you braved being in public with Sebastian and only teased him a little for his choice of hat. Hopefully it would help keep his anonymity, and by extension, yours.
“Oreos?” You asked hopefully, knowing full well Sebastian wouldn’t say no. You were eating better, but any time you got excited over some food, you could see him mentally putting that dish on a list of meals that you were sure to eat. And even though Oreos weren’t healthy, they were food nonetheless.
“Regular? Double stuffed? Mint?”
“Mmm,” you considered, looking up at the shelves upon shelves of cookies. Your energy was slowly depleting, and you found yourself leaning against the cart more and more. Still, you were enjoying the little trip. “Regular is better to dip in milk, but double stuff is better if you don’t have milk. And you can never go wrong with mint…”
“You want all three?” He shot you a look with an amused eyebrow quirk.
“I mean, yes. But that’s a lot of Oreos to eat before they go stale. Why don’t they have a triple pack? Each row is a different kind? That would sell great.”
Surprise covered his face. “That’s… actually a good idea.”
“Don’t sound so shocked. I have good ideas every once in a while.”
“After you made me watch that one movie about the sexually transmitted demon, I’m not so sure.”
Your laughter rang down the aisle. “Okay, fair point.” Rolling the cart forward, you grabbed a pack of mint Oreos and tossed it by the boxed brownies you’d also conned him into getting. He tried talking you out of it, saying you could stop by the bakery down the street and get better brownies, but your counter point that you couldn’t eat half the brownie batter from the bakery had won you the round.
“What’s next?” you asked. “Ice cream?”
“You’re supposed to be eating healthy,” he pointed out.
“Look, can we just be happy that I’m finally getting my appetite back? You can lecture me about calories or saturated fats or whatever tomorrow.” Giving him your best puppy dog eyes, you pouted out your bottom lip. “Please? I might just wither away if I don’t have cheesecake ice cream tonight.”
He mumbled under his breath before starting to walk away.
You followed him, ignoring the squeaky wheel on your cart. “What was that?”
“If you spend more than two minutes choosing which flavor of ice cream, you’re not getting any,” he replied. That wasn’t what he had mumbled, you were sure, but you let it go.
“I’ll do you one better. If Ben and Jerry’s Strawberry Cheesecake isn’t stocked, I won’t get ice cream at all. Deal?”
“Deal. So, ice cream, produce section… anything else?”
With a head shake, you pushed forward until you were walking right next to Sebastian. He glanced at you and you gave him a soft grin. “Thank you, Seb. You’re the best.”
He tossed his arm around your shoulder and pulled you slightly closer. After pressing a quick kiss to the side of your head, he gave you a cocky grin. “I know I am, sweetheart.”
Sweetheart.
First in Dr. Chowdhury’s office and now here. That damn word was going to be the death of you, you swore.
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Any ideas what it was Seb said under his breath?? And how do you think the interview later tonight is going to go? 
Chapter 13: The First Interview
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tilbageidanmark · 3 years
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Movies I watched this week - 23
Stephen Chow’s strange and wildly-imaginative Kung Fu Hustle, a stylistically outrageous action-packed martial arts Wuxia-comedy. Lots of cinematic references throughout, including The Shining’s Fountain of blood (at 1:01).
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Revisiting Bertolucci:
✳️✳️✳️ The Conformist examines the psychology of acceptance and fascism. Jean-Louis Trintignant is a weak-willed bureaucrat whose need to ‘belong’ is so strong that he agrees to assassinate his former college professor on behalf of Mussolini’s secret police.
Beautifully shot by Vittorio Storaro with a score by George Delerue.
With Don Fanucci AND Pierre Clémenti as the two drivers! 8 /10
✳️✳️✳️ Before I left Jerusalem, I met an unusual patron. He was an older, rich, religious Jew who was seeking my friendship, and invited me to come with him to New York. Even though he didn’t get to seduce me, he had a certain agenda, which was not clear to innocent me. One night, he took me to the premiere of the artsy Last Tango in Paris, which shocked and confused me, because - like Pauline Kael - I’ve never seen anything like that before.
But it surely helped create a Paris fantasy / fetish in my mind that never left, of fucking Maria Schneider on a mattress in a large, empty apartment at 1 rue Jules Verne. And I still dream about it 50 years later...
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First watch: James Agee’s Night of the Hunter  - A Southern Gothic nightmare and the only film directed by Charles Laughton. Evil preacher and serial wife-murderer Robert Mitchum is the ultimate villain in this depression-era, silent-film German expressionist style.
With Shelly winters who (again) gets knocked off in the middle of the movie.
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4 more with Michael Shannon and 2 more by Jeff Nichols:
✳️✳️✳️ Midnight Special - Michael Shannon‘s 8 year old son has mystical powers, so the two have to go on the run, pursued by the government and “The Ranch” cultists. It’s like Close Encounters of a smaller kind, and Adam Driver is like the Truffaut guy - “Take me with you”…
Produced by fucken’ Steve Mnuchin!
✳️✳️✳️ …”America I’ve given you all and now I’m nothing. 
America two dollars and twentyseven cents January 17, 1956. 
America I am the Scottsboro boys. 
There must be some other way to settle this argument….”
Loving - A straight-forward biography of Richard and Mildred Loving, two simple people with symbolic last name, who fell in love in 1958 Virginia.
(By complete coincidence, I decided to watch it on June 11, one day before the designated Loving Day!)
- Best film of the week.
✳️✳️✳️ Two 14-year-old boys from rural Arkansas find a boat stuck high in a tree on a small island in the Mississippi River, and agree to help Matthew McConaughey’s “Mud”, a mysterious fugitive evading a posse of vigilantes. Another dark Southern Gothic evoking Huckleberry Finn.
✳️✳️✳️ Michael Shannon’s film debut (as Fred), Groundhog Day, was designed in such a way that you can watch it again and again. Just like the Groundhog Day!
With the absolutely gorgeous Andie MacDowell. 10/ 10 ✴️                       
And so I binged, AGAIN, on my ALL-time Time Loop story, Palm Springs, less than 2 months since the last time.…
Both of these films are basically love stories.
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2 more by Susanne Bier:
✳️✳️✳️ Watched her tender After The Wedding again, together with Pernille, who could figure out the story’s many twists and turns in advance. Love Sidse Babett Knudsen’s face.
✳️✳️✳️ Things we lost in the fire: In Bier’s first American film, Halle Berry is a young widow grieving the tragic death of her husband, and she takes in her husband’s heroin addicted best friend. The beginning is very sad, and it just builds from there. 7/10
In both films, a damaged, conflicted individual gets an unexpected, difficult new opportunity.
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The Fugitive - Peak 90′s big-time action-thriller movie!
Ford! Jones! Julianne Moore! Provasic!
“Newman, what are you doing?”
- I’m thinking.
“Well, think me up a cup of coffee and a chocolate doughnut with some of those little sprinkles on top, while you’re thinking…”
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The latest film by Ramin Bahrani, White tiger. Unsubtle and confusing Netflix class-struggle gig, set as an Indian rags-to-riches story, about a poor villager who wants and can’t break away the shackles of servitude imposed on his caste. Disappointing!
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Two young ‘Stand up Comedians’:
✳️✳️✳️ Bo Burnham trying to describe musically what it's been like being stuck, alone and broken Inside, during this Covid year.
Short, experimental episodes, many of them indulgent, but some, like White Woman’s Instagram, or Welcome to the Internet, haunting and poignant.
“…The whole world at your fingertips

The ocean at your door

The live-action Lion King

The Pepsi halftime show

Twenty thousand years of this

Seven more to go…

A gift shop at the gun range

A mass shooting at the mall
There it is again
That funny feeling…”
✳️✳️✳️ John Mulaney: The Comeback Kid, about the night he met Bill Clinton at the same ballroom where The Fugitive Richard Kimble confronted Dr. Nichols about falsifying Provasic’s medical research and orchestrating murder….
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Throw-back to the art project:
Night of the Hunter Adora.
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(My complete movie list is here)
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