#and then I haven’t written more than 15k in the two months since I finished

[tothelasthoursofmylife]

:) I managed to write nearly 15k of words during July Camp^^ which is quite nice considering I’ve not been feeling the best for a while.

Within those ~15k words is the finished first draft of Clockmaker 4!^^ (It’s almost 11k! So far, hah.) I’ll edit it in the next days and it should be ready and up by Friday or Saturday. (Sunday morning (for me) at the latest.) No super long wait this time. What a relief.

Lately, I’ve noticed that WotQ is getting accessed a bit more often than before (and I got 3 (!!) public bookmarks since the last update on AO3 which is a LOT to me; and 5 this year so far which never happened before; also more kudos??) which is nice but also super weird. Keeping the momentum (?) with another update just two months later (while I still can).

Clockmaker 4 is the last part (this time, it really is the last part XD) of the Clockmaker chapters. Preparation for what follows will take a while, I think, so I can’t (as always) say when the next chapter will come. Maybe I’ll just interlude by finally (!!!) getting to Henriette 2 while making prepartions. Maybe.

Last month, I also worked and (almost) finished my zine piece. (It’s due today 🙈) I applied on a whim, certain I would never ever get picked - and then I did. It was so much fun to write that piece; I haven’t written for that fandom in years and it was nice to return for a little while. Anyway, I also wrote some more snippets which are under the cut :)

#365

And only now did he realise that they had the same height.

#366

Cecelia said and then shuddered. “I want to be contrary so that I’m not on their side, but I cannot in this case. This may be the one aspect we can all agree on; I feel sick.”

#367

“And, Milton,” Cloudia said, turning to him, “it’s now time for you to take a bath and get changed.”

Milton looked down at himself, at the black goo sticking to his clothes and hands. “Right. I… I didn’t bring a change of clothes though.”

Cedric raised an eyebrow. “Didn’t you arrive with a suitcase?”

----

I cut out the following part because it just sounds a bit like Milton’s joking and he doesn’t joke, so it had to go. (I still think it’s fun, so here it is.)

“Don’t tell me there is only [...] in it.”

“Oh, well.” Milton fumbled with the end of one of his sticky sleeves. “I won’t then.”

She stared at him. “Milton.”

#368

I wanted to open my eyes and would not.

I wanted to scream and could not.

#369

“Damn,” said Cedric and earned a glare from the librarian.

#370

Rowan scrutinised her for a considerable period of time, and Cloudia wished he would finally invite her inside. She could not stand for much longer and would rather not collapse in front of his eyes.

#371

Walter was saving money for his wedding when he died. Cedric was caught by sadness as he always was when he learned of broken loves and promises, but what piqued his interest was a brief moment the night before.

#nanowrimo #july camp 2022 #snippets

[hogwartsfirebolt]

Hello everyone! I’m back for my (omg time flies) third yearly drarry rec list, in which I share with you my 30 favorite drarry fics I read in the year, divided in three parts. What a year 2020 was. It was challenging, scary and confusing, and it was also an amazing reading year for me, I read so, so much more than I ever had before, and I’m really excited to share these masterpieces with you! The banner art is by @dragontamerdame who is one of my favorite artists and was kind enough to let me use this beautiful piece, which you can (and totally should) reblog right here. Now, with nothing else to add and in no particular order, here’s my

FAVORITE FICS I READ IN 2020 PART ONE

1. Who we are in the shadows - @quicksilvermaid - 100k - E - What happens when you’re forced to become the very thing you despise? Ex-Auror Harry Potter, tossed out of the Ministry for something he had no control over, has been looking for a way back to his former life. When he comes across Draco Malfoy in the criminal underbelly of Wizarding London and in need of protection, Harry figures bringing him in to face the Ministry's justice is his ticket back to everything he's lost. But nothing is exactly as it seems. Not even Harry himself. And as he gets drawn further and further into Malfoy's world of honour and deception he finds himself questioning everything he thought he knew—about his childhood nemesis, the Ministry job he misses so much, and most of all, about himself. What happens when you’re forced to see that you were wrong?

THIS FIC!!! It was the first one I read in 2020, and it immediately became my favorite fic of the entire year, and one of my favorites of all time. I have since read it two more times, the entire 100k of it. There are absolutely no words to describe how amazing it is, how much it floored me to read their characterizations, their jobs and the roads life took them on to end up where they end up, the connection between them in a time when they don’t even know how to relate to anyone, their sorrow and struggles which, despite being so rooted in the magical world, are painfully human, just... wow. It’s a masterpiece. It changed the way I view their characters, forever, and I suspect I will read it many, many more times in the years to come. It’s that kind of story. If for whatever reason you haven’t read it, this is your sign to take that chance and embark on this amazing journey. 

2. Every Kingdom - @thistle-verse - 7k - E - Every kingdom needs a prince. Every prince needs a good and useful knight. Draco and Harry play their parts and renegotiate some borders while they’re at it.

So, so lovely. Even though I don’t read them very often, alternate universes fascinate me so much, and I am in awe of the author for being able to pack so, so much story, so neatly into 7k words. This features a princely, lonesome Draco, a charming, golden Harry, and a blossoming love that could change everything. It’s beautiful, and I recommend it deeply.

3. The Bucket List - GallaPlacidia - 32k - Draco will die in six months if he can't get Harry Potter to fall in love with him. Since that's not going to happen, he might as well spend his last days working through his Bucket List. Tap-dancing lessons? Rock climbing? Poetry-writing? Threesomes? Cocaine? Getting to know his adorable cousin, Teddy Lupin? Draco will try them all! Feat. Cheerily pessimistic Draco, devoted bitch queen Pansy Parkinson, and a Harry who can't help but notice that something seems DIFFERENT about Draco, these days.

I’m positive that many, many of us got acquainted with GallaPlacidia’s writing this year, and I, too, fell in love with it. This story aches in the most beautiful of ways, the humor happens to be somehow light in such a difficult circumstance that it ends up hurting when you laugh, it hurts when everything is right because it’s also wrong, it aches when it’s supposed to be a happy moment and feels tender and sweet when it’s not. I can’t even imagine the challenge of writing this kind of story, and they pulled it off beautifully. It’s a lovely story, one you will take with you long after you finish it, and, personally, I think it’s a great introduction to the author’s writing. 

4. halcyon days - @the-starryknight - 1.3k - T - Sleepy mornings caught while the sun rises are reserved for silly word games and soft touches and feelings.

Oh my god, the amount of tenderness in such a low wordcount made me weak in the knees. I almost couldn’t take it. Being able to convey such a deep emotional connection in a short story seems like such a daunting task, and the author makes it seem almost effortless. I guarantee that this will make you bring your hands to your chest and sigh with how lovely it is. Reading it will be the best ten minutes of your day. 

5. Clouds That Veil the Midnight Moon - @drarrytrash - 37k - E - According to Harry’s personal narrative regarding the incident, he’d hooked up with Draco Malfoy for purely self-destructive reasons, or out of convenience, or by some unlucky accident. Looking at him, sprawled in the moonlight, Harry is devastated to recall that he’d hooked up with Draco Malfoy because he’s hot. Draco is a secret werewolf and Harry is doing his best and they've got criminals to catch, darn it.

Reading this, I found myself laughing out loud, nodding profusely with how freaking spot on the characterizations are. The dialogue is amazing, so hilarious and real and Harry’s inner monologue is so, so him. I love everything about this story. I have a soft spot for werewolf fic, and this one hit everything I love about it, the case is interesting and engaging, the incidental characters, the OCs, Ron and Hermione, everyone and everything is absolutely perfect and I had an absolute blast reading it. You HAVE to read this and see for yourself what I’m talking about. 

6. Sex Ed for Aurors - curiouslyfic - 8k - M - Some things, you need to learn on the job.

Oh my god this is so freaking good. The premise is, basically, that Harry is accidentally doused with a lust potion while in the vicinity of Draco, and suddenly wants him more than anything. I loved this take on that trope, we’re in Harry’s head, and it’s absolutely hilarious and endearing to experience the near childish glee he feels whenever Draco looks his way, when he smiles, when he feels he’s made him happy, meanwhile Draco and Ron are horrified and doing whatever they can to correct it. This is so funny and such a good time, I can’t recommend it enough! While you’re at it, you should definitely read megyal’s remix of this, which is also a blast. 

7. plasticine porters with looking-glass ties - @bonesliketambourines - 15K - E - Lately, Harry thinks things don’t seem the same between him and Draco. His head is in the clouds when he thinks about what their relationship is now, and where it might be headed—he’s happy with their friendship, but he wants something else. A potions accident over a lunchtime visit to Draco’s lab (what does he get up to in there, anyway?) changes things, though, and accelerates their relationship faster than either of them had ever expected. How are they going to get through this new development together?

Atmospheric, beautifully-written and delicious. Their relationship is tender, just on the edge of something more, when they’re forced to quarantine together and face the effects of a potion that makes them see and feel things differently, which makes for the most intense, visual, gorgeous sex scene I think I’ve ever read. It’s just absolutely phenomenal. 

8. i wake up falling - warmfoothills - 9k - M - Draco’s always leaving, one way or another. Harry’s usually 240 thousand miles too late.

In trying to come up with a way to summarize this story, I’m feeling the overwhelming urge to cry again, just like I did when I read it. It’s just so, so, beautiful, every single word of it aches in the best way, the longing feels deeply authentic and just, the setting and the jobs and everything is so unique and gorgeous. Every single work by this author is beyond beautiful, but especially this one is incredibly close to my heart and I think everyone should read it. It’s a gem. 

9. In Every Universe - @skeptiquewrites - 27k - M - They sent Professor Harry Potter to search for Unspeakable Draco Malfoy. Draco has stolen a Firebird, an experimental magical device from the Department of Mysteries that lets you enter parallel universes as yourself. As Harry traverses from universe to universe, he begins to think Draco might be the one searching for him. A story about whether knowing what's possible makes it possible.

Stories where the characters find themselves somehow hopping from one reality to another are always so, so fascinating to me, and this one is incredibly creative and well-written, so entertaining all around. The mystery of it kept me on my toes, and every single reality was a joy to read. 10/10

10. Life goes not backward - @shealwaysreads - 8k - T - Harry still isn’t used to gifts, but this one is different. A story of coming home, finding safe ground, and the wild courage of putting down roots. Leaving one life behind isn’t always a sacrifice, and sometimes the greatest good comes from embracing the people you love.

My god, there are not enough words to describe how much this story means to me, how beautiful it is, how every single time I’ve read it, I’ve cried. Bella has undoubtedly become one of my absolute favorite writers in fandom. She has such a way with words, there is not one of her stories that hasn’t touched me, that doesn’t feel like an actual, full-length novel no matter the word count. I read so many of them this year, so many of the masterpieces she’s gifted us, but this one especially is so tender, so dear, that I ended up choosing it as my favorite of hers this year. Harry’s charactertization, the unbelievable warmth of their relationship, absolutely everything about this is gorgeous. Go read it, right now, and then binge all her other works!! You won’t regret it.

---------------------------------

Each of these fics is incredibly close to my heart and I enjoyed them immensely. In the midst of everything changing, I really found comfort and solace in the amazing works of the people of this fandom. I hope they give you the same amount of warmth and comfort they gave me, and I’m ALWAYS here to gush about any of them ❤️ Happy New Year! 

#drarry #drarry fic #drarry fanfic #drarry fic rec #2020rec #ficrec #draco malfoy #harry potter #drarry rec list

[fangqueen]

Fic Rec Tag Meme

@sitp-recs, I’m terribly late, but this looked way too fun, so I had to join in. Fair warning, y’all, not everything here is Drarry, or even HP (I am a prolific rarepair shipper/multi-fandomer, and Dron is my OTP 😂), so I’ve added the fandoms and pairings below as well. All of these (and many more!) can also be found on my ficshelf! It was so hard to pick these as it was, I couldn’t help but point you in the right direction for all the ones I (sadly, unfortunately) had to cut from the list, lol.

Anyway, thank you so much for running this tag meme, @sitp-recs! It’s been amazing seeing everyone’s recs and discovering new fics! 🖤

• A fic you love without knowing the source material: He Was a Punk, Pete Did Tabletop Roleplay by @mscaptainwinchester Marvel | Peter/Wade | NC-17 | 7.5k

• A fic with a premise that shouldn’t work but it does: Anthony J. Crowley, Retired Demon and Airbnb Superhost by @theoldaquarian Good Omens | Hints of Aziraphale/Crowley | G | 3k All fics are valid and work!! That being said, I had no idea just how much I was going to fall in love with a fic about Crowley being an AirBnB host when I first opened it. 😂

• A fic you’ve reread several times: Department of Magical Creatures Case 62637 by @mscaptainwinchester (under RonsPigwidgeon at the time) HP | Draco/various, Ron/OMC, Ron/Draco | R | 121k How could I expected to only pick ONE?! 😂 I’ve reread everything you’re seeing here - I’ve reread nearly every fic I’ve ever recced at least once. But I couldn’t make a favorites list without this fic, so might as well put it here, haha!

• A fic you still remember many years later: Fire Burn and Cauldron Bubble by Sushi HP | Severus/Severus | NC-17 | 8.9k I remembered it so well (and fondly) that after 12+ years, I went scouring the Wayback Machine to find it. And yes, the pairing is correct. Don’t look at me. If you’re still interested in reading after knowing that, hit me up, ‘cause it takes a bit of instruction to find it now.

• A comfort fic: You and I by @shiftylinguini HP | Scorpius/Albus S. | NC-17 | 32k

• A cathartic fic: The Conformity Conspiracy by shrink South Park | Michael/Pete (or Ethan/Dylan, as this was written before they had names in canon) | R | 71k I really struggled with this entry. I came to the realization that...I don’t know if I’ve ever actually felt catharsis from a piece of media before??? Well, I have with music, for sure, but not really with anything else. Anyway, I chose this fic for this slot because every time I read it, I’m transported back to being a goth teen. I can feel every word, every action, like I’m going through those years again with them...Which isn’t necessarily what cathartic means, but fuck it, it works for me, haha. ***As always whenever I rec this fic, I do just have to warn that it’s not properly tagged on AO3, and there is definitely some potentially triggering content in it. If you’re interested in reading and would like to know more (so you can be better prepared), feel free to DM me!***

• A fic you’d print and put on your bookshelf: In Flight, Two Boys by lobst_r HP | Marcus/Oliver | NC-17 | 29K Again, how I could possibly pick only one for this one?! I would print out ALL of these fics if I could, and many more! But this is such a beautiful fic, it definitely deserves a spot on the list, and what better spot for it than this? There’s actually a sequel currently posting as well! I haven’t gotten around to reading it yet, but I’m sure it’s just as amazing, if not more so.

• A fic you associate with a song: You Do Your Body Work, I Feel My Pulse Working Overtime by @veelawings HP | Draco/Harry | NC-17 | 1.6k I mean, it’s in the title. 😜 But also this is just a truly inspiring fic that I absolutely had to include! (I realized I somehow haven’t queued a rec post for it yet, and I will make sure to fix that soon!)

• A fic that inspires you: dirtynumbangelboy by @magpiefngrl HP | Draco/Harry | NC-17 | 39k

• A fic that brought you onboard a new ship: Lumos by birdsofshore HP | Draco/Harry | NC-17 | 41k Some people may be surprised to know that Drarry was, uh.......once my NOTP. Yes, really. 😂 You wouldn’t suspect that nowadays, would you??? LOL. It’s all because of this wonderful, beautiful fic. I saw it getting recced everywhere at the time and said fuck it, I’ll give the pairing another try - and I never looked back!

• A fic you wish could be a movie: Midnight in the City of a Hundred Spires by @shiftylinguini HP | Draco/Harry | NC-17 | 25k

• A fic that led to you making friends with the author: A Weasel in the Hamptons by @peachpety HP | Ron/Draco | NC-17 | 15k I don’t quite know if this counts, because I believe we’d already been speaking before this??? 😂 But of course, being that I’m the mod for Ron/Draco Fest, I knew who was writing for this prompt of mine, and thus we dispensed with the formalities in private, haha! It was a great experience, and I was so overjoyed to see the results in the end. So happy to have met you, love! 😘 Hope you’re well!

• Free Space: The Pizzaria: A Sordid Tale of Destiny, Evil and Garlic by Mad_Maudlin HP | Ron/Draco | PG-13 | 36k A Dron/crack!fic staple, honestly, and I just couldn’t make a favorites list without it!

• A fic you’ve gushed about irl: Runway by @candawrites HP | Ron/Draco | R | 15k

• A fic you associate with a place: Archipelago by Mad_Maudlin HP | Ron/Draco | NC-17 | 18k I just have a very distinct visual memory of reading this fic for the first time: sitting on the couch in my mom’s living room, the sun setting outside. (I was visiting for her bday, I believe???)  I think of that moment every time I see the title.

• A fic that made you gasp out loud: clutched your life and wished it kept by @glitteringvoids HP | Ron/Draco | R | 110K

• A fic you found at the right time: Howlr by @partialtopotter HP | Draco/Harry | NC-17 | 47k I got really sick in summer 2018. I know I’ve talked about it on here a million times at this point, so I won’t dwell. But I ended up finding and reading this fic the following March, and it reawakened my love of fic and fandom that had been lost over the previous months while I was dealing with everything. I hadn’t been reading or writing at all in all that time, and I ended up reading this whole thing in one sitting. I couldn’t put it down! It just made me feel so good, after a long time of not feeling anywhere near good.

• A fic that you would read fic of: In the Garden After Dark by @the-starryknight HP | Draco/Harry | R | 3.5k I just need more of this universe and Draco’s Illusion magic. 😍

• A fic that made you laugh out loud: Why Parvati Patil Must Die by hull1984 HP | Ron/Draco | PG-13 | 39k

• A fic with a line (or two) that you’ve memorized by heart: Hail to the King by Mad_Maudlin HP | Ron/Zacharias, Ron/Zacharias/Draco | NC-17 | 5k

• A fic that gave you butterflies: The Electric Fizzing Prick Pistols, or Whatever by whitmans_kiss HP | Sirius/Remus | PG-13 | 3.8k

• A fic that embodies something that you value in life: Luna Lovegood: Wank Coach for the Long-Since Deceased by yrfrndfrnkly HP | gen | PG-13 | 9.8k This was another difficult category to choose for. Not that I don’t think any fics I’ve read display good values! Of course they do! But I have this weird issue where I don’t, like...project? at all??? So sometimes it’s hard for me to recognize these things in what I read. But eventually I realized it had to be this fic, because I just love the carefree way Luna lives her life here, her job helping people (well, ghosts who could use some sexual release, specifically, but you know), and the wonderful friends she surrounds herself with.

• A favorite AU: Quibbler Unsolved by Leontina HP | Draco/Harry | PG-13 | 17k More of a fusion than an AU, but it’s just fantastic!

• A fic you stayed up too late to finish reading: Grounds for Divorce by @tepre HP | Draco/Harry | NC-17 | 122k

• A fic that made you feel seen: Taste the Rainbow by @maraudersaffair HP | Ginny/Pansy | PG-13 | 639

#fic rec tag meme #fangqueen recs fics #fangqueen speaks

[hlcreators]

AUTHOR REC: mediawhore / @mediawhorefics 

Be sure to show some love and leave kudos and a comment!

The Murmur of Yearning (93k)

Four years ago, Harry Styles was forced into a marriage of convenience to enrich and ally both his and his promised's families. The sudden, and slightly suspicious, death of the Marquess of Haxshire, however, brings great disturbance to Crescentfield Hall and, as his late's husband's closest male relative, Harry unexpectedly finds himself the head of a family he never felt he belonged to. Between a meddling distant cousin hellbent on inserting himself in Harry’s life, his wicked and mistrustful mother-in-law and his late husband’s advisors refusing to help or take him seriously, Harry struggles in the fight to keep what he’s earned and make the Estate finally feel like home.

Luckily, he doesn’t stand completely alone and finds himself an unlikely ally in Mr Tomlinson, the elusive Land Stewart who has been taking care of the property in the shadows for years. Louis Tomlinson is caring, patient, and unlike everyone else, he doesn’t seem to think Harry committed a murder.

‘Sup (6.7k)

Gemma really wants her little brother to sign up for a dating app and get back in the game after a messy divorce. Harry thinks he’s way too old to swipe. They compromise to devastatingly embarrassing results.

Meanwhile, all Louis wants is to finish the play he’s been commissioned to write, but one of the regulars at his local coffee shop keeps distracting him.

ft. older larry, pushy gemma, harry being a disaster gay and silver fox louis.

Tired Tired Sea (113k)

As a B&B owner on the most remote of all the British Isles, Louis Tomlinson is used to spending the coldest half of the year in complete isolation, with his dog and the sea as sole companions. Until, one day, a mysterious stranger on a quest to rebuild himself rents a room for the winter.

The Blood of Words (33.7k)

Louis Tomlinson hasn’t sworn off relationships per se. He just doesn’t think he’s quite ready for one yet, despite his therapist’s encouragements. He’s comfortable in his position as editor for Styles Publishing and he’s happy to focus on his career while he gives himself more time to heal.

Enter his CEO’s brother, a boxer with a heart of gold who is determined to carve himself a space in Louis’ life and, more importantly, his heart.

Peace In Your Arms (1.5k)

The happily ever after ... Or a series of TEC codas 

the dead things we carry (25k)

September ‘49 He hasn’t seen him since that day in France, that horrible muddy day where for one terrifyingly long second, Louis really thought he was going to die. He winces with the phantom pain, the hand not holding his cane going to his stomach automatically, remembering the franticness, the tenderness, of Harry’s hands while Louis was bleeding out.

This is the man who saved Louis’ life.

For one second, Louis fears Harry won’t recognise him, but his eyes widen when he turns to his left and they meet Louis’. He takes a step forward, reaching for him with a shaky hand before stopping himself.

“Louis,’ Harry says with a shudder and Louis doesn’t think his name has ever carried more weight.

This is the only man Louis ever thought about kissing for real.

“Oh,” Mrs. Padley says, clearly taken aback. “You two know each other?”

There are some things people never fully come home from. Until, one day, if they’re lucky, home comes to them.

Things Gone Cold (24k)

"your heart is warm for things gone cold.”— Sophocles, Antigone

With his soulmate’s thoughts about him written on his skin and the world’s eyes trailing his every movement, Harry Styles is having a bit of a rough time releasing his second album in peace. And that’s not even counting the breakup. Or the car crash.

Through Eerie Chaos (102k)

For as long as anyone can remember, Old Hillsbridge Manor has always been believed to be haunted. Everyone in the village agrees and keeps a respectful, fearful, distance. New in town after a bad breakup and an internship that led to disappointment rather than a permanent job, Harry Styles figures taking pictures of the decrepit building could be a great new creative project. Or at least a much-needed distraction while he searches for a job and crashes at his parents’ new house. No one warned him about the apparitions though; about the music, the laughter, the people who flicker and vanish when you call after them, the echoes of a past that should be long gone… Harry has never believed in spirits but even he can admit that there’s something weird going on. What starts as mere curiosity evolves into a full-blown investigation and soon enough, Harry finds himself making friends with an aristocrat from the 1920s and struggling with finding the best way to tell him that he’s dead.

The Ghost Hunter AU where Niall lives to prove ghosts are real, Zayn is a skeptical librarian and Harry gets caught up in a century-old mystery and catches feeling in the process.

Sleep It Off (844)

I've felt better ! Hello 2017 !!

What do you mean he’s coming? (15k)

When Harry accepted to be his sister’s Maid of Honour, despite how non-traditional of a choice he was, he didn’t think writing a speech for the wedding reception would be this hard. Now, not only does he have less than two weeks left to find something moving and inspirational to say, but Gemma just confided in him that her old childhood best friend is going to be in attendance. The one who moved to LA and they haven’t seen in fifteen years because he was too busy becoming an Academy Awards winner. But hey, no pressure. It’s just Louis Fucking Tomlinson.

Harry is screwed.

a fully armed battalion (to remind you of my love) (5.6k)

“He was flirting with you by the way,” Niall says casually once he’s finished saying goodbye to Louis and he’s joined Harry outside.

“No he wasn’t,” Harry replies automatically, feeling his heart clench at the thought. Was he?

Niall simply raises a mocking eyebrow in response before wrapping his scarf twice around his neck.

“Not that it matters!” Harry says quickly, eyes widening. “I wouldn’t care even if he did because he’s awful and the worst.”

Everyone at Hogwarts knows that Professor Styles and Professor Tomlinson absolutely despise each other. It's too bad that they're in love.

Coax the Cold (86k)

England, 1897.

English Professor Louis Tomlinson’s passion for the occult has been a source of mockery and derision for most of his life. When he hears whispers of a travelling freak show newly established in London claiming the existence of a monstrous sea hybrid, half-man, half-fish, Louis sees it as his ticket to credibility amongst his peers. The summer he spends undercover working on the show, however, gives him much more than that.

All These Lights (34.8k)

“People vote for alphas because they’re strong and they’re not only beautiful but also mesmerizing. They make you want to give them all of your attention, make you want to beg for some of theirs back. They’re shiny, oozing sex appeal and a commanding presence, and people always want more and more. Omegas are enticing too for sure, but it’s not the same. It makes people uncomfortable. It doesn’t make them want to root for you.”

the canon fic where Harry is an omega and dreams come with a price.

wash him deep where the tides are turning (3.7k)

"When Harry finally tells Louis about his family’s curse and the true love spell that broke it, they’ve been dating for seven months, nineteen days and about twelve hours and Louis’ cock is buried deep inside his arse."

Part two of a practical magic au.

a long way down (to the bottom of the river) (24k)

“ Most people would call Harry silly for believing in curses. Childish would also be a probable insult thrown his way. In their little town full of little people, Harry’s whimsical nature and beliefs mean that he’s subjected to frequent judgemental looks and whispers. It doesn’t usually bother him. Most people don’t know about the magic thrumming through his veins or about how powerful words can truly be. Most people don’t carry around their ancestors grief like a burden. They don’t have to pay for deeds hundreds of years old like Harry and his family have. They get to love freely without fear.

Harry and his kin aren’t so lucky.”

a practical magic au in which Harry and his sister accidentally kill her abusive boyfriend with magic and Louis is the D.I working the case.

loose lips sink ship all the damn time (not this time) (39k)

“Louis Tomlinson is gay,” Fiona announces and she sounds calm at least. “That’s not a scandal,” Nick replies automatically even though he feels slightly sick. He needs to call Louis back. Now. “No,” Fiona agrees quickly. “But his underage gay sex tape is.” The one where Louis is outed via a sex tape he made before the X-Factor and Nick can't resist flying to America to give him a shoulder to cry on. Told through flashbacks, this is a story of getting together and getting back together.

all that i’ll ever need is in your eyes (4.2k)

Louis has known he's going to marry Harry Styles since he was eighteen years old. Five years later, he has the perfect proposal planned. Too bad he can't help blurting it out while they're detained at the mall.

hi hater, kiss kiss (3.8k)

Nick has had a crush on Louis Tomlinson ever since he first saw him perform on the x-factor. Almost four years later, he's finally accepted that their ongoing, unstoppable feud is the only thing the two of them will ever share. One game of Call or Delete with Niall Horan, however, starts to shake this belief.

your bones illuminate (5.4k)

High School AU Snapshots of Harry and Louis' relationship through their last year of sixth form. Warning: There is no plot. Only fluff.

the last people standing (at the end of the night) (7.4k)

Sequel to the greatest pretenders (in the cold morning light)

A year after his undercover assignment ended, Louis should finally feel at peace. With Cowell & Co finally dead or behind bars, his life is more simple than ever. It's too bad his feelings can't be buried as deep as the people he's lost.

An undercover cops AU

you think fashion is your friend, my friend (fashion is danger) (27k)

"Louis has one rule, and one rule only, that he simply refuses to break. He forbids himself to be attracted to anyone he might work with. No wanking to models who might wear his clothes! It’s hardly fair, considering he spends 95% of his time working with the most attractive men on the planet, but his career is more important. Besides, in Louis’ experience, it always leads to disaster. Harry Styles makes respecting the rule really damn hard though and Louis is not quite sure why."

the one where Louis is a famous British designer and Harry is the clumsy, most likely straight model that makes his heart race.

the greatest pretenders (in the cold morning light) (41.5k)

undercover cops/the departed au

Louis and Nick are on two different sides of the law and mobster Simon Cowell is not the only person they have in common. The one where Louis is an undercover cop and Harry is the court-ordered shrink who refuses to prescribe him Valium.

#writer appreciation week #1dsource #hljournal #fics #author rec

[shadowsong26fic]

Coming Attractions!

A day late, but ah well...

As usual, we’ll go ahead and do an Open Question Night. Which basically means that, while my ask box is always open, tonight I’ll be keeping an eye on it and answering things as they come in. Any fandom or work I’ve talked about here (or posted on AO3) is fair game, as are general questions about writing, etc. I do accept prompts, but I am. Not very good at filling them in a timely manner unless they Immediately spark something, lol.

So, yeah, what’s on your mind?

Also, since I don’t think I have for a couple months, plug for my Discord server! It’s pretty quiet, mostly intended to be a slightly more interactive extension of this space, but you’re welcome to check it out!

Anyway, the usual Coming Attractions details are behind the cut!

PodTogether 2021:

I participated in this challenge for the first time this year, and it was a whole lot of fun! Of Other Suns is a SW/AtLA crossover, and I think it turned out pretty well! My reader/podficcer and I worked pretty closely together during the initial brainstorming process, working out what we wanted to do, and also bounced off one another during the whole editing/finalizing process. There’s a lot that I didn’t end up putting into the fic (because time and length; I am a. Uh. Very wordy writer; the aim was for 6-12k words, we ended up with nearly 15k as it is...), so I might poke more at this specific AU, or crossovers linking up at a different time (either a different point in the SW canon, or in the AtLA canon, or both). I...definitely have extensive headcanons for SW characters as benders of various elements (or nonbenders), and there are at least two Force-sensitive AtLA characters who were outside the scope of the crossover.

Anyway, if you want to check it out...click this link XD (and definitely listen to the podfic too!!! It’s really great)

Precipice:

So, between the final push on PodTogether and some origfic stuff I got done, I...did not get anything finished and posted for this, alas. But! I am saying it here in the hopes that doing so publicly will for once get me to actually stick to a deadline, which is that I will get either the first Protectors chapter or the next Preludes one-shot (or both!) up by this Sunday, September 12. The Protectors chapter will be mostly scene-setting, establishing where various characters are when we open, six years after we last saw our heroes. The Preludes segment will involved Hondo contacting Obi-Wan (and Anakin, who’s with him when he gets the call) about something Relevant To Their Interests.

I will for sure get that Prelude out this month, and hopefully at least two Protectors chapters, but we’ll see how things go at work and how much brain that takes, which is always a factor...anyway, with any luck, I’ll start establishing a Rhythm. I don’t think I’ll be doing weekly updates, the way I did for the first few arcs of Precipice (in part because there are some other longform projects I intend to start putting out and if I am going to do Weekly Fic Posts, I’ll probably alternate), but we’ll see how things go.

AtLA Fic:

Again, I didn’t finish what I wanted to (other than the aforementioned crossover for PodTogether), but I have been working on stuff in the background and, while I’m not going to commit to a Specific Deadline like I am for Precipice, I do plan to post at least the opening chapter of the still-untitled Avatar Zuko AU I’ve been working on this month, so watch this space!

Other Fic Projects:

I’m poking around at what to do for next years SWBB (if only because my wordcounts have been Steadily Increasing and I’d like to get a head start in anticipation of that happening again this year, lol). Still considering exactly what to do, whether I pour all my focus into OFLAM, like I consider every year, or see if I can work up Bail Unfucks the Timeline or another half-plotted AU I have in the back of my head, or go with a different prompt/storyline that occurs to me at some point between now and then, but I’m starting to Actively Ponder things.

I do have that BSG1 crossover outline in the works, I swear XD I’ve got...uh...maybe half to two thirds of the first third of the overall storyline written up? XD It’s a. Uh. Long one. I might go ahead and release it in three parts, just for length/convenience, and because it does more or less have three distinct sections (the initial contact/New Caprica fallout and establishment of the Haven settlement which makes sense in context; the second contact/algae planet; and then an adventure on a resurrection ship to retrieve a Specific Boxed Five and possibly walk away with Ellen because that would just ruin Cavil’s day and I do so love to ruin Cavil’s day, lol). ...I’m going to go ahead and post a preview snippet at the bottom of this post, as Motivation XD

I think that’s all the fanfic stuff I have specific updates for. There’s generally always stuff noodling around in my brain (lately, for Star Wars, AtLA, BSG, or some combination of the three), it’s just how much of it materializes, lol.

At some point, I plan to revisit some BSG epics I had going on (Serenissima; rewriting For Sorrow Sung or doing a slightly different storlyine with the same concept; The Other Battlestar; a few others), but no concrete plans as of yet.

I also kind of want to explore a far-past AtLA setting I designed for a challenge community way back? But I’m not sure if that would work better as an original work with the serial numbers filed off, if I could figure out how I wanted to do that (I have done it before, as I’ll talk about below, but this concept, while not directly involving any characters from Avatar canon as it’s set 2000 years prior to Sozin’s reign, does to an extent lean on the Avatar specifically as a concept, in a way that the other fic I did this with did not).

Original Fic:

Due to a challenge on rainbowfic, I actually got. Quite a bit written? Most of it was not super plot-relevant, but I dropped some Hints about a character in Lux and I got to play in some heads I don’t very often. I might go back to the Regency AU at some point, and there’s a specific reveal I want to write up for a secondary character in The Farglass Cycle, but I haven’t quite figured out how to structure that one, so we’ll see how it goes.

Had an interesting discussion the other day about the way original fiction sometimes starts as fanfic with the serial  numbers filed off and...well, a lot of my original stuff starts that way? Or has some roots there, anyway.

Lux doesn’t quite as much, but I definitely ported in at least two characters who started as fanfic characters (leaving aside that this is, y’know, The Apocalypse IN SPACE so, like. Various fandoms that deal with that probably influenced things, plus several key players are Public Domain Characters sooooo), plus some of the way the world is constructed draws on the Native Tongue trilogy and I flat-out stole a concept from Queen of the Damned, though the way it works in this world is different (also, to be fair, I think I’ve seen it in other places, too; but I personally got the idea from there).

The Farglass Cycle and Untitled Intrigues Story, however, straight-up started as fanfic concepts. And I don’t think it’s obvious unless I point out what the source materials were? Farglass, in particular (it’s the AtLA fic I mentioned earlier), because it started as an alternate future and then the map and magic system got reworked, plus the Avatar themself wasn’t even super involved in the original fic context, and while certain characters are very loosely based on AtLA characters, by now they’ve been so altered by the setting that it’s...I used the same archetypes, if that makes sense?

And then Untitled Intrigues Story started as a fusion between two wildly different fandoms, and while one character is a pretty clear expy if you know where he comes from, and another character kept the same actress in my head, I don’t think it’s very clear other than that.

...anyway, not sure where I’m going with that, other than it’s been in my head lately, lol.

...I think that about covers it! What about you guys? What are you all working on? Slash any questions, etc.?

Teaser for BSG1 AU outline, as promised:

So, anyway, SG-1 is prepared for rain and mud and a survivable-but-kinda-unpleasant environment. They’re also prepared for the usual shenanigans--Goa’uld, cranky local politics, weird alien tech that Daniel really should know better than to touch but sends him into another dimension anyway...

Just. Y’know. A normal mission.

They’re...not quite prepared for what they actually find when they step through.

Which is a very tense and now slightly Confused crowd of people, and a firing squad made up of very large killer robots, with a teenage girl as their target.

(One of the large killer robots is. Uh. Well. Half a large killer robot now; that particular Centurion was in the wrong place at the wrong time and got kawooshed in the face. As one does.)

(Said Centurion absolutely wins the ‘Weirdest Death’ pool for the week in Download City, because that is clearly a thing that exists because it entertains me)

There’s a beat where everyone just stares at everyone else, trying to figure out what the hell is going on.

The wormhole disengages.

Daniel takes half a step forward, opens his mouth to start the ‘we are peaceful explorers from Earth and y’all seem to be having a Moment here, sorry for interrupting, but, uh...’

And then the moment end and absolute chaos erupts.

#coming attractions #open question night #shadowsong writes star wars #shadowsong writes atla #shadowsong writes crossovers #shadowsong writes original fic #feedback greatly appreciated

[astoldbygingersnaps]

Harper’s 2020 Fic Wrap-Up

my very good friend and incredibly talented felow writer @sagemoderocklee came up with the idea of doing an end of the year fic wrapup in an attempt to polish the turd known as 2020, and since i actually managed to get some writing done this year i figured, why not jump on the bandwagon? 

a lot of super duper fucking shitty things happened in 2020, but i will always be proud that in this incredibly chaotic, stressful, and challenging year i managed to produce almost 180k of content (and that’s not even counting the writing i started in 2020 but haven’t published yet). so, to celebrate what’s been a pretty big achievement for me, i wanted to go through the various projects i’ve spent the last twelve months working on and give a preview of my plans for 2021.

let’s jump in!

projects i worked on/completed in 2020:

first off, let’s start with the beast to end all beasts, my personal baby, and honestly probably the reason most people follow me -- star trek au:

something bigger than the sky (shiita; 44,163 words; completed): 

i’ve said this before, but the whole idea for star trek au was literally just a joke between me and my-then girlfriend, now-fiancee, and eternal shiita enabler alexa aka @durintrash (by the way, if you follow me for my fics and you DON’T follow alexa for her corresponding art WHAT, exactly, are you doing with your life????) where i sat in a space-themed diner and said ‘haha imagine itachi as a vulcan.’ but then i blinked and suddenly somehow i’d written the prologue and the first chapter of SBTTS in the span of a week. it’s like i was possessed by a fanfic demon.

it sounds super cheesy but i honestly can’t say enough how important this fic has been to me and how much it’s pushed me to be a more productive and more dedicated writer. previously i spent a lot of time Thinking about writing and occasionally i’d put a few words on the page and then i’d go... do... something... else. but star trek au was the first idea i loved enough that it actually pushed me to write and keep writing and not give up even when i was confronted with things like writer’s block and worry over the quality of my writing. so thank you, star trek au, for being the light in a very dark year for me. 

by the end of SBTTS, i felt like i accomplished everything i wanted to do with the story’s beginning installment: i introduced all the characters and set the groundwork for their development; i showed what life on the corvus was like and how starfleet, the federation, and the universe functioned; and, more than anything, i was able to sketch out both the main protagonists -- itachi and shisui -- with all their strengths and flaws, show their relationship to one another, and hint at how that relationship would progress. 

all the stars are closer (shiita; 75,195 words; completed)

considering how slow i used to be at writing, i thought it would be, like, twelve years before i managed to get to the second part in the series. BUT then covid happened and i half-lost, half-quit my job, and like a lot of people this year i ended up with a lot of free time on my hands. and so, like a fucking demon, i finished this part in two and a half months. 

when i originally planned this part out, i really thought it would be a lot shorter and a lot lighter atmosphere-wise than it turned out. instead, this second section of the story ended up being pretty meaty in terms of length and in subject.

that said, overall, i’m really happy with how ATSAC turned out. i loved the way the characters progressed, how the relationships deepened, and how we were able to see this universe grow bigger and more complicated. and i’m very satisifed with how it set the stage for part three, which takes us to...

lovers alone wear sunlight (shiita; 41,518 words; in progress)

there’s... a lot about this part that i just can’t talk about yet, a) because it isn’t finished and b) because it contains some of the biggest plot points in the entire series thus far. if you’ve been keeping up with the stardates thus far (which i encourage you to do!) you know what part three is leading up to: itachi leaving the corvus and the dissolution of shisui and itachi’s growing relationship. 

with that in mind, i’m... more than a little terrified about writing part three, which is why the third chapter has been languishing in my google drive for months now. (and also why i started not one, but TWO new fics to cope with my writer’s block. whoops.) chapter three is where all the parts come together and shit hits the fan, and i can only hope that everyone will be as excited to read it as i am to publish it. 

next up, the two other projects i began this year:

salvation comes only in our dreams (shiita; canon divergence; 16,835 words; in progress)

for a long time, i’ve wanted to write something that’s actually set in the naruto universe and works to correct a lot of the flaws that i see in the series. there are a lot of things that bother me about naruto, but i think one of the things that frustrates me the most is the really messy and in some ways offensive resolution to the uchiha coup plot thread, and i wanted to write a story that dealt with the complicated themes of the series--imperialism, oppression, genocide, child soldiers--but, like, didn’t suck and completely drop the ball. thus, the massacre au was born. 

my main goal was to tell a story that showed a lot of these characters in ways we’ve never seen them before, specifically itachi. i didn’t want to write itachi as just an idealist who suffers and Suffers AND SUFFERS for konoha yet still remains loyal to the village for some unfathomable reason like he is in the series. i wanted to write an itachi that was sharper, more jaded, and more suspicious of the world around him, but overall was still a good person with a kind heart. and for shisui, well... obviously there’s a lot going on there, too. 

this is easily the darkest story i’ve ever written, and as the plot thickens it will certainly get darker with relationship dynamics that are complicated and unhealthy At Best. i hope that as the story goes on it’s a ride people continue to enjoy, as i was super pleasantly surprised at how popular this fic became (compared to my usual stats, at least) 

oceans between us (shiita; alternate universe; 15,039 words; in progress)

it’s good to know that i continue to be the most ridiculously niche version of myself as yes, i wrote a fucking shiita atonement au. 

with each fic i write i try to have a very specific voice that suits the particular piece and distinguishes it from other stories that include the same characters. for example, star trek au chapters tend to be more fun and light-hearted (especially shisui POV chapters) and lean more into the action movie and sci-fi adventure feel of the star trek universe, while the massacre au is written in a way that’s much heavier and guided by itachi’s emotions and experiences. my main goal with this story was to give it the same romantic, operatic, almost hazy quality that the movie has, which reflects the period setting and also the nature of this grand tragic love story. 

i knew from the beginning that there were going to be a lot of things that i cut from the film in my retelling, like the lola subplot and obviously the setting of pre-wwii england. i also knew i wanted to explore some of the aspects of the film that were implied more than outright stated, like the themes of classism and upper-class privileges. and more than anything i wanted to structure this piece around this idea of tension building and building until it finally snaps and there’s just a world of mess and hurt and loss that affects these two characters in two very different ways. 

also, the sex scene. i haven’t written a sex scene for anything in, like, a decade, so that was a lot of pressure. but i’m happy with how it came out and i think it ended up being an aspect of the story that felt like both a natural progression and necessary to show the affection these two people have for one another.

originally i was just going to end the story with shisui going to jail, but when i told alexa this i genuinely thought she was going to kill me. so, that didn’t happen lmao. but the more i tried to imagine what a second chapter would look like, the more i realized she was right, and it would have been a terrible idea to end the fic there. as for whether or not the final chapter will keep That Ending... who can say?

goals i have for 2021:

finishing lovers alone wear sunlight and, if i’m very lucky, beginning the fourth and second to last part of star trek au (yes, as it currently stands this 160k+ word series is only halfway finished. sorry not sorry)

publishing the next chapter of salvation comes only in our dreams (i don’t know when it will drop. i don’t know anything about this fic. please do not @ me) 

completing oceans between us (the second and final chapter is currently sitting at about 4k words and will probably end up at about 15k in total)

completing and publishing a new fic i’ve started at the very end of 2020, which is the shiita jurassic world au nobody but me and alexa knew they wanted. it’s essentially a 90s romcom with dinosaurs and i cannot Wait to share it. (it’s at about 9k right now and will probably end up being around 20k to 23k in total... maybe...)

FINALLY starting my dream project: the shiita olympics au i’ve been planning for years, where itachi is a figure skater and shisui is a hockey player (i’d like to keep this under 150k but at this point trying to keep my stories at a managable word count is a losing battle)

anyway, that’s it! if you managed to get this far in this very self-indulgent and shameless bit of self promotion, congrats! also, a very big thank you to everyone who’s read my fics, left me kudos and comments, and spent their time on my work, because it really does mean the world to me. 

here’s hoping 2021 is a much healthier and happier year for us all! 

#my fic #shiita #this was so much fun to write so kudos to eeri for coming up with this idea

[echo-bleu]

Writing Thoughts: July 2020

First, I am ridiculously late in replying to comments, and I’m sorry.

This isn’t going to be a regular report, because I took a (longer than planned) break from writing, so I have essentially nothing to report. I meant to take a week off at the end of June because I wasn’t feeling it anymore and needed a break. It’s been five weeks, and I’ve written a whooping 10k words since, most of which is entirely unusable.

So I’ll try to use this post to remind myself of why (and what) I want to write.

I kinda joined a new fandom. Historically I’ve been pretty much unable to be in multiple fandoms at the same time when they’re hyperfixations (and I don’t write if it’s not a fixation), but I also don’t want to leave my fics unfinished. Right now, I have very little interest left for RNM. This may change, it might just be the first phase of a new SpIn, or it might now, I don’t know. But what I should really say is that I have no interest for RNM canon. I still love my AUs. I’m not reading RNM fics at the moment, but I have about a dozen tabs open on new chapters or fics I want to read eventually, and I’ll get there.

The new fandom is Shadowhunters, by the way. I fell in love with Alec Lightwood and with Malec years after everybody and joined the fandom late as is my habit. I’m not sure how long it’s going to last, but the fandom is very active and I’ve started writing (those 10k words) so we’ll see. It does have one thing that I was missing in my last two fandoms (and especially RNM) which is a character that I can properly headcanon as autistic so I can write for my own neurotype, which is frankly a breath of fresh air sometimes. For the most part, I don’t even like the other characters or the worldbuilding of that show though, so it may end up being a short SpIn.

That said, I really don’t want to abandon my fics (and I’m aware that I said that before and still ended up abandoning fics, but es is probably the only one who remembers so...well.) I want to remind myself of what I love in the fics I’m writing.

Easiest and shortest first, down to breathing needs two more chapters that are planned out and aren’t going to be very long and I’m pretty sure I’ll get there. I just need to figure out if my brain will do better with trying to finish this so it’s out of the way, or going back to one of the longer (and AU) ones to get immersed again.

still, there were mornings may end up being the hardest one to go back to. It’s not fully planned out, and it kind of requires for me to go back to the season 2 plot to try to untangle what I can keep from that, something I don’t particularly want to do. I did have fun writing the first few chapters though, so maybe I can get back in. I like Rosa in this one, a lot. I planned on getting Greg in there pretty early, that should be nice. Plus plenty of whump and h/c, which is always what’s easiest and nicest for me to write. Yes. I need to remember that. Less plot, more h/c lol.

our hands clasped so tight is still my baby. I love it so much, I love writing it even when it doesn’t come easily. I think a big part of the reason I ended up needing a break was that I was stuck on this one, and had little interest in writing anything else. I have autistic Michael (not as easy to write as I’d hoped because I still struggle with Michael in general, esp since s2, but still nice), I really love Alex in this fic for a number of reasons, there’s a flashback chapter at some point with a LOT of angst... fluff and angst and h/c in the main plot, plus some nice surprises coming up. Plus, it’s a plot with low stakes, so I can play around. It reminds me a lot of the Underground (my long Gifted fic that I did end up abandoning 😭 I still have a fool’s hope of going back to it someday) in that regard, so hopefully it won’t meet the same fate.

The sequel to setting fire to our insides (for fun). Ouch. I really want to write it, but it sometimes hits a little too close to home. It’s the one that is dangerous for me to write when I’m not doing well, but too hard when I’m well, so it’s a difficult balance. So many people were enthusiastic about the sequel in the comments, and I also feel like I can’t do it justice, but I felt like that about the first part for months. So I don’t know. I guess I’ll see if I can get into that particular mood again.

Complicated Truths is the one AU that I honestly feel the least good about. I was excited at first, I still am in theory I guess, but I struggled too much with giving it a coherent plot, and what I do have is way too long for me to keep up interest. Maybe I need to talk it out with someone, come up with something shorter and easier if I want to keep going. I do love writing blind Alex, and I enjoy the Malex dynamic of it. And the spy setting, even though I feel a little out of my depth.

Power Through. I really want to get back to it. I love it so much. It’s all plotted out, even if now I kinda want to include Rosa more and get Gregory in. I don’t know why I haven’t managed to write more, I think I got lost in the one-shots and shorter fics that I enjoy writing less but give me more instant gratification I suppose... Plus season 2 threw me for a loop. But this and our hands are the two fics that I’d really want to write to the end, if I have to choose.

I also still have the Big Bang I signed up to. Eh. I planned on doing one of the AUs I outlined but never wrote, but it would be long, and the truth is that I don’t think I can handle another long AU. So my plan is shifting a bit toward a shorter fic (maybe 15k or so) with a lot less plot and more feels. I’m not allowed to say more :D

The thing I started writing for Shadowhunters is a series of short fics, not a full WIP, I’m not committing to something like that just yet. Not sure whether I’ll post anything at all. We’ll see.

This was ridiculously long as usual, so thank you if you’ve read to the end! It was really more a note for myself than meant for any of you tbh, but if you really want to see one of these fics to completion, feel free to tell me, I need the encouragement 💙

#echo's writing thoughts #our hands clasped so tight #power through #complicated truths #still there were mornings #setting fire #untitled big bang fic

[ooachilliaoo]

Love Yourself Challenge

I was tagged by two amazing lovelies @rpgwarrior4824 and @pip-n-flinx – Thanks for thinking of me you guys!

Rules: It’s time to love yourselves! Choose your 5 favourite works you created in the past year (fics, art, edits, etc. ) and link them below  to reflect on the amazing things you brought into the world. Tag as many writers/artists/etc. as you want (fan or original) so we can spread the love and link each other to awesome works!

Because of my weird non-chronological way of writing I haven’t actually posted 5 things this year (even if you take ‘this year’ to mean since April 19) so I’m going to include some WIP’s here if that’s ok.  

1.       Time Effect Coda Fandom: Mass Effect/ Dr Who Pairings: Shepard/Kaidan Alenko & Rose/Ten.

So, this went up yesterday and damn I have been dying to share it. Don’t get me wrong I love ‘Time Effect’ and when I started, Time Effect was just going to be a happy little adventure where Commander Shepard met the Tenth Doctor and chaos happened. (If anyone is interested, I chose Ten because I personally found his particular cadence easier to write). Then my brain went ‘hey hold up just ….HOLD UP a minute. What if we made it PAINFUL?’ and ‘Coda’ was born (though credit for the title should rightfully go to my amazing editor @faith-less-one).

This one has a lot of my personal headcannons for events that happened after the Reaper war wrapped up in it which I loved laying down on paper. The Rannoch section came to me really easily, so that was joy to write. In contrast the scene on Tuchanka took so damn long and had so many iterations I honestly lost count of how many times I started over but when it was done I was SO HAPPY with the result.

2.       Promises

Fandom: Dragon Age Origins.   Pairings: Alistiar Theirin / Elissa Cousland. 

I honestly can’t remember how long I had chapter one and two of this laid down. It was definitely years maybe something as long as like…3 years? I always knew ultimately where it was going but then like DAI happened and all my Dragon Age energy went into DAI fic for a time. 

I think I actually rediscovered it when I was moving files onto my new laptop and it had been long enough that my brain was like ‘this is good’ rather than seeing like…all the mistakes? So I knuckled down. I remember though I was writing the end and I knew I’d planned to do the wedding a-la Elizabeth Swan and Will Turner but somehow when I got there the tone didn’t feel quite right. So I messaged my wonderful editor and best of friends @faith-less-one like ‘you’ve read chapters one and two of this? Should I include a Pirates of the Caribbean wedding at the end?’ and she dead ass responded, ‘honey if the opportunity for a Pirates of the Caribbean wedding presents itself you put in a Pirates of the Caribbean wedding’. So I did, because I had to, clearly.

3.       Memories Fandom: Mass Effect Characters: Liara T’Soni

Look, I’m never going to write anything better for N7 day than ‘Tough Kid’ it’s just not going to happen and I can accept that. But this? This came pretty close. Once again this contains some more of my long-held post war headcannons and it was nice to write from Liara’s perspective for once. I think this one was inspired by a post or a tweet or something that pointed out that due to the lifespan differences and ages eventually Liara and Grunt would be the only surviving members of the Normandy crew. So, I took a shot at what that might look like. 

4.       Untitled Mass Effect Longfic – hit 160K 

Fandom: Mass Effect Pairings: Shepard/Kaidan Alenko

This thing. This thing doesn’t even have an official title. But I’ll tell you what it does have - over 160K words making it the longest thing I’ve ever written.  I’ve been working on it for years - no I am not going to say how many, and it’s probably not even half way done. It’s basically a re-telling of the main storyline with a little post-war fix it tacked onto the end. It might one day be finished and see the light of day or I might end up working on it and reworking it forever.

It’s big. It’s messy and because I don’t write chronologically I need a whole ass indexed excel sheet to track what parts I’d coved already. It definitely contains some of my best writing and probably some of my worst. 160K leaves room for a lot. But hitting 160K felt good. 

5.       Untitled Robin Hood DAO AU. 

Fandom: Dragon Age Origins.   Pairings: Alistair Theirin / Elissa Cousland.

So, this was an idea I’d had for I don’t know how long. I know it happened because the BBC Robin Hood series starring Jonas Armstrong was on Amazon Prime at the same time as I was replaying DAO and my brain just went ‘what the hell’. But god knows how long it sat on the shelf as a vague idea before I even started it. The basic idea was that this would be an AU where Alistair grew up as landed nobility (still the kings’ bastard but a titled bastard). Then when he returns from an exalted march to a Ferelden ruled by Logain he basically …becomes Robin Hood.

I actually started it during NaNo. To be clear I hadn’t planned to write it during NaNo. I have a few ‘longfic WIP’s’ as a I call them and rarely the attention span to write just one of them every day for a month so usually I flip between them  (yes, I know this makes me a NaNo rebel but in my defence …shhhh). In September I work at getting all my longfics to a level word count (to make tracking the 1,667 per day easier) so I had 2 ME longfics and 2 DA longfics at precise word counts at the start of NaNo.

Then what did I do?

I started this AU instead. 15K of this AU laid down in NaNo and it’s just a joy to write. It’s got limitless capacity for banter and snark and I love writing banter and snark. I also like crafting an Alistair that’s not a million miles from DAO Alistair but changed slightly by growing up with responsibility and family.

So yeah that’s some of the stuff I’m proud of from this year.

I’ll Tag: @faith-less-one @poweredbycoffeeandwine @ljandersen @hawkeykirsah @alyssalenko @natsora & anyone else who wants to! (No obligation of course and also sorry if any of you have already done this and i missed it!)

#this is so sweet #love this idea #writer things #show me all the stuffs

[loxxxlay]

Official note about Dark Thor Grandthorki fic and Semi-Hiatus

The Situation My Dumb Ambitious Ass Has Landed Itself In

Unfortunately, my big bang date has arrived a lot quicker than I expected it to. >.> On Friday, I’m expected to post the fic I’ve been working on since June. Don’t get me wrong, I have very much been working on it this whole time; unfortunately, I have also been doing quite a lot of exhausting things, including treatment for mental health and college classes. I’m suffocating in the stress of my last semester, which isn’t great for fanfic writing. T_T woe is meeee~

Because of ^, my dark-Thor grandthorki fic (god it needs a title too, huh) is incomplete and, no matter what, will not be completed by Friday (especially considering that all but one of my classes has something due this Friday, too, ugh). Luckily I did sign up for a solo track for big bang so no artist has been ill-used! Unluckily I have robbed some actually prepared & hard-working individual of a very lenient&late posting date. T_T Thus, I want to at least post something on Friday because it would be super inconsiderate and irresponsible of me otherwise, no matter how unprepared I am D:

So, here is what I have decided for my Big Bang/Dark Thor Grandthorki fic:

I am going to post the beginning chunk (about 10-15k words) of the fic! It will be posted as a WIP but as the spirit of the big bang is only to post a completed fic, the part I post will not end on any rudely patience-challenging cliffhanger.  (Those who are still waiting for OoT and Figment of Choice to be complete, I am so so sorry lmfao, and this will not be anything like those cliffhangers.) In fact, I’m trying to make this chunk end on a note that is as complete as possible, while still being a WIP.

As for the quality of this beginning chunk... sigh... It’s definitely not my best writing ever since the only times I could work on it were unfortunately times where my writing skill was rusty and atrophied. >.> However, it’s definitely not my worst writing either lmao, so hopefully it will still be enjoyable! @veliseraptor will be betaing the part most recent and most clunky (I didn’t ask her to beta all of it because that would be super unfair in such a short time frame lmao), and until Friday I will be doing my best to polish the rest!

However! As the entire fic isn’t quite written/outlined, I’m nervous about posting this beginning chunk because of how future writing might require changes to be made. Therefore, the part I post is potentially gonna be subject to extreme changes once I start working on it again months from now. In other words, after I graduate, I’m gonna edit it, possibly change things that happen in it, depending on future scenes, and hopefully do it better justice.

Why am I telling you all of this?

Well, because I don’t want y'all to read this Dark Thor Grandthorki fic with high expectations! T____T I know a lot of you have been super excited and eager to read it after all the excerpts I’ve shown you and all the meta I’ve posted about it. I remember receiving a ton of asks about it back in the pique of me working on it. And.. like.. I know I say this a lot, but I genuinely mean it this time: This is not going to be my usual expected brand of (allegedly) good fic. This is gonna be at least a little disappointing. This is not to criticize myself. It’s just a fact based on how I’ve been writing it and how little I can edit it right now.

And I’m honestly super sad because this project has been so so so important and fun for me that I don’t want you to go in without knowing that it won’t be as good as I want it to be.

In fact, my biggest reason for telling you all this is to give everyone an OPTION to actually NOT read it on Friday. If you want to see it in its final form and its final form only, you can instead wait until I’ve actually had a chance to complete the entire fic, edit what needs editing, get it beta-ed, and feel prepared enough to stick to a regular posting schedule. Obviously I don’t care one way or another when you choose to read it--have at it if you don’t care about it being sub-par! ^_^ I just want you all to know where I’m coming from and be able to decide one way or another. So yeah. Feel free to decide whether you want to read the shittier version on Friday or whether you wanna save yourself for the less shitty version later!

Semi-Hiatus Info:

Initial Note: I’m not really going on any kind of hiatus. I’m changing nothing about what I’m doing recently. I’m just... officially acknowledging that I’ve got one foot in fandom right now and one foot out. And that it will continue to be like this until I graduate in December.

And sighhh, I know I say “ohhhh I will be so much more free and able to work on fandom stuff when this date arrives” again and again and again and nothing ever changes lmfao. But when I say I’ll be more free to work on stuff after December, I actually mean it lmfao because that is when I’ll be graduated from college. I’ve never been graduated from college my entire time in fandom, so you can trust that I’m not kidding around this time.

So yeah, in light of my recent silences/etc, please don’t think I’m disappearing. T_T I’m just really stressed and ... even though I try to lie to myself about it ... realistically ... it’s just not possible for me to do all the fandom stuff that I want to be doing right now. :( Especially as this final semester starts ramping up and finals week starts approaching. :/

Obviously, I’ll still be busy after I graduate. I’ll be looking for full-time work and be starting the process of moving out (I’m super excited!) But the mental energy I’ll need for writing won’t be used up by essays and papers and original creative writing classes! (Assuming I get a seat-warming job, crosses fingers lol.) So basically I’m just letting you all know that, despite my behavior, I haven’t forgotten anything! I just really don’t have time (yet).

For sake of knowing when you can expect things, here’s a list of the things I want to work on (starting December) in order of importance:

(honestly this is as much for my reference as yours lmao)

Commenting and reblogging this year’s Grandthorki Day fics! Very top priority, and if I get a free two seconds in my life, I’ll try to do some of this before semester ends too

Putting Grandthorki Rimworld streams into shorter view-able highlights instead of the full-streaming chunks that they currently are in (especially that 3-hour unwatchable one)

Finishing OoT

Commenting on the rest of the grandthorki fics that have been neglected in recent months

Finishing Moment of Peace

Finishing Figment of Choice

Completing the Big Bang/Dark Thor Grandthorki Fic

Going through my drafts to answer all the asks and recommend all the fic I’ve put there

Finishing that Whumptober Collection and/or Re-Doing Whumptober (because lets be real by the time all of this is done, it will probably be October haha)

Updating Happily Ever After

If I’m forgetting anything that you guys really have been wanting me to do, please let me know!

#sorry i just felt like i needed to say S o m e t h i n g because this has been weighing on me quite a bit the last several months #long post #blog maintenance #grandthorki for ts #dark thor #lox talks personal

[aaeoluss]

Nano Closing Thoughts: 2019 vs 2018

+ November 29 WC: 2,179 // November 30 WC: 5,562

WIP blog: @thesecondmoonwip // Previous nano updates: week one two three four

If you’re interested at all about the details of these graphs, I keep all my nano stats in this spreadsheet

Total WC: 2019: 50,198 (2018: 50,051) 

Average daily WC: 2019: 1,673 (2018: 2,176 [avg not counting the obvious outlier of day 23: 1,880]) 

Average daily WC not counting days with WC of 0: 2019: 2,092 (2018: 2,275 [not counting day 23: 1,969])  

Most words written in a day: 6,027 Nov 27 (2018: 8,700 Nov 23)

Least words written in a day not counting 0: 347 Nov 22 (1,000 Nov 16)

General Thoughts 

Nano is really interesting because I think it’s a really fast way to learn things about yourself. When you set a goal, do you mean it? Are you good at making plans and schedules that work for you? And when you make a plan, do you stick to it? Do you procrastinate, are you always writing furiously right before bed or trying to write 15k on the last day? I’ve noticed that when I answer these questions, they don’t apply only to nano, but to writing and actually lots of things in my life. 

You can tell by taking a quick peek at my graphs up above, but my nano this year was a little more chaotic than last year’s. Last year, I sat down and wrote the same amount every day, but this year I tried to be fancy and set different daily goals based on my work and school schedule. It... sort of worked. It worked really well the first week, but what ended up was I never got in the habit of doing it, and I ended up getting behind. At the start of the month, I was like, “oh, I know I couldn’t write 1,667 words every day, I’m too busy on Thursday, and I have so much more time on Wednesday” and etc, but by the end of the month? Writing  1,667 words seems really easy and I was cursing myself for not just sitting down and doing it every day. 

I’m a better writer than I was last year. I’m better at writing itself, and I have more stamina, I can sit down and write faster and I can write for longer without getting tired. However, I’ve realized that nano isn’t really about that. Last year I went in after finishing my first book, and I was used to writing 400 words a night. I still walked out victorious, and it was because nano can be easy if you just sit down and write 1,667 words every night. That’s really not that many words when it comes down to it, and that’s the fun of it. Anyone can win nano (some people have really really busy lives and literally do not have the time to do it, but I’m not talking about that). It’s just about dedication.

Last year my takeaway was that you can write a lot more than you think you can if you set your mind to it. My takeaway this year is that the most important thing really is sitting down and writing every. single. day. That’s something I used to know, I used to hold it dear to my heart, but The Second Moon is my fifth book, and I think sometimes I get too caught up in trying to be cool and write a lot in one day and stuff like that and I forget about the basics. 

What next?

Although I hit 50k, and I’m counting that as a win in terms of nano, the book actually is not finished. There are only 40 scenes in TSM, and some of them used to be two scenes but now they’re one long scene, or they’re important so they’re longer etc, but as a general rule, my scene comfort zone used to be about 1k, so that’s what I planned for. Most of the scenes in TSM are longer, though, so I hit 50k without actually finishing all the scenes. I’m not far off, I’ve only got one scene left, but I’m a little bummed, I didn’t really want this issue to run into December. I think if I can get it on my shelf before winter break starts (Dec 14) I’ll be alright with that, though. 

Once I format it and design a cover, I’m going to use Amazon’s Kindle Direct Publishing to get my book printed. If you haven’t heard of it before, I’d highly recommend it, it’s super cool. I used it to print out all my books, and they all sit proudly on my shelf.

I know it’s bad practice to write a first draft and call it done, but I see nano as more of an exercise than anything. It would take an immense amount of time and effort to turn this draft into something I’m really proud of, and I’m honestly just not passionate about the project to do that. 

I’ll be jumping back to my main project, Pseudonyms! I haven’t worked on it for a hot second and I am so excited to get back to it. I finished the first draft around six months ago (?), and it’s time for a complete rewrite! I have a lot of ideas, and I’ve grown as a writer a lot since then, and I’m really excited. 

As for doing nano in the future, I’m unsure. Now that I’m done, it’s easy to look back and say, “hey, that was easy, and we got to get a book out of the WIP queue.” (because I have a lot of books I want to write, and when I can take a month and get one out of my head, that’s always great). However, I vividly remember a lot of times over the month where I told myself I would never do nano again. It’s difficult to say. 

However, if I do end up doing nano again, I think I’ll set a higher goal for myself than 50k. Nano really lacked spice for me this year, I went into it feeling very complacent that I would hit 50k and I was rarely too stressed about it. Idk. I just feel like it’s not nano if you’re panicked for the whole month, + I don’t feel nearly as accomplished as I would if I had set a higher goal. 

And that’s all I have to say on that! I hope everyone who participated in nano had a good month! 

#writing #writeblr #nano #nanowrimo

[porchwood]

Hi just so I understand cause i keep waiting for it and it doesnt seem likely to happen have you kind of fallen out of love with wtm? and everlark in general tbh? cause ive been following you for a while now and you always had lil quotes and pictures and things that reminded you inspired you whatever it was about katniss and wtm and now alllll it is is gadge i followed you because personally i love what you did with everlark and im just wondering if thats gone and not foreseeable any time soon?

I’ve been thinking a lot about how to answer this… It’s afair question - to a point. If you’re more of a drop-in person (like me) thanlive-on-the-dash, coming back to find my blog awash in Gadge might have beenquite upsetting. There are several reasons for the current state of things:

1. Life has been driving me into the ground since December26, 2013. (Yes, going on six straight years.) If you were a WtM reader from thebeginning, you may recall that I was pretty energetic and prolific in 2012-2013.Oh, there were tough times, but nothing like what started on the aforementioneddate (a car accident where I was in the “bystander” vehicle and it still got totaled)and has continued relentlessly ever since. Sometimes adversity leads to greatcreativity and sometimes it turns you into a depressed, exhausted, reclusivelump, and the past 5+ years have seen periods of both from me. These past 18months have been exceptionally awful (and expensive), resulting in very littlewriting at all, about any pairing.

2. Writing WtM takes a lot out of me. I don’t know whether thisis common knowledge or not, but it’s the gospel truth. I love that world, Ilove that version of Everlark, but every chapter requires so much hard work, itmakes me tired just to think of it. Not to mention, over the past couple of chaptersEverlark have been pushing for more intimacy than the plot/timeline allows, andso I’ve been struggling with how I want to handle that. Do I fight them andstick to the plan? (I can’t advance the timeline for several reasons.) Do I tryto figure out a cheat for them? They’ve got minds of their own and have changedmy plans multiple times, but this is something they genuinely can’t have, and Ihave to fight them on it. ☹ Which is sad, frustrating, and exhausting.

3. I’m a multi-pairing shipper, and have been from about 3chapters into WtM. Which means that my Everlark fics almost always feature asecondary pairing (or more than one), and sometimes I’ll get a plot bunny for afic about a pairing other than Everlark. Most writers in the THG fandom exclusivelywrite their OTP, whatever the plot bunny, but I find that some plot bunnies don’tfit Everlark as well as they do another pairing. (This is why I’ll never write aBeauty and the Beast Everlark fic unless Katniss is the “Beast,” if you will.)

4. The Everlark fandom is…tricky. I’ve never fit in there. Idon’t write Everlark the way the majority of fans see them (except for Peetabeing “sweet,” I guess), I hated the movies (I refuse to see MJ 1 or 2), and I’vemanaged to really rub some people the wrong way over the years –unintentionally, and for a variety of reasons – all of which leaves me feeling kinda down about Everlark in general. Don’t misunderstand me: I love Everlarkand WtM, but it’s really isolating to be this sad little island of unpopularopinions and unwelcome side-ships. That’s the part I really wish I could makeyou understand. For six years I’ve had Christopher Plummer in my head saying, “You’llnever be one of them,” and he’s so, cruelly, right. I want to cry every time Ithink of Embracing the Season (my E-rated Everlark modern AU oneshot for Lovein Panem - lots of daring for me!) because I poured heart and soul into that andit still wasn’t the Everlark that people wanted.

5. About a year and a half ago (when Strawberry Time reallytook off of its own accord) I participated in Gadge Day 2017, working my buttoff to find and schedule (and tag) over 100 carefully chosen Gale/Madge/Gadge aestheticposts, and for lack of a better way to say it: it turned on my Gadge-dar. After that, thosekinds of posts just leapt out at me whenever I had a chance to scroll, and forseveral months I wasn’t sure what to do with that. With a little encouragementfrom @ghtlovesthg, I came up with #march madgeness – wherein I turned my Tumblrinto Madge/Gadge-land for one month, and it was a blast. (Side-stepping Gadgefor a moment: Madge is a highly underappreciated and underused character,especially in fic/on Tumblr and I love splashing the dash with Madge-love.) Thenext month I launched a run of pent-up Everlark posts (i.e., regularprogramming), but I missed my Madge, so I instituted #madge monday – one day aweek when I could splash the dash with Madge/Gadge. At every juncture I gavepeople tags to block if they didn’t want to see this content (though I stillget unfollows every time I post, alas). I participated in last summer’s THG Reread– on the fringe of it, but my posts (reblogs and meta) were strongly Everlark-focusedagain during that time. So there’s definitely still been Everlark on my blog,but if you’re just dropping in (or for that matter, glancing at my archive), you’regoing to see a majority of Madge/Gadge.

6. Frankly, Gadge is fun. It’s a completely different dynamicthan Everlark, with less pressure to create something transcendent, and whenthe chips are down, I’m more likely to work on something that isn’t my six-years-runningopus. This spring, in the midst of lots of awfulness, I finally wrote a piecethat I’ve had in my head for years – The Best Part of Waking Up – with a differentpairing featured in each drabble “chapter,” including Gadge, Luka/Johanna (whoI’ve been wanting to put out there for AGES) and Jack/Raisa. I haven’t beenable to write quickly in years, and I think I finished those three “chapters”in about two days, maybe three. I completed the Raisa drabble in a couple ofhours and I consider it one of the best things I’ve ever written. (Honestly, ifa pairing was going to topple Everlark in my heart, it would be Jack/Raisa, i.e.,Mr. Everdeen/Mrs. Mellark. I love them to distraction.) Once upon a time I could drabble/sprint Everlark too – notoften, but I could manage it. Maybe it’ll happen again someday, but for thetime being, when I write in quick eager bursts, it’s usually about aside-pairing.

7. Because I just need to say it: about a year ago, I set up a secondary Tumblr for almost all my side-interests and ships outside of THG. When I first joined Tumblr, porchwood was just a fun page where I posted whatever struck my fancy (pretty things, funny things, whatever I liked), and over the next few years, I honed it into a pretty “writer’s notebook” for WtM and my other THG fics (related quotes, aesthetic posts, writing check-ins, etc.). When Star Wars: The Force Awakens came out, I shared a handful of posts pertaining to a new ship (not a new direction for my blog or writing, just sharing my excitement) and it was made very clear to me that people didn’t want to see that content on my page. So when I started watching Voltron: Legendary Defender, I had a sneaking suspicion people wouldn’t want to hear about those ships either. So I started an entirely new Tumblr for that content, and every so often I accidentally post something to the wrong page, which I immediately correct in horror, but people still unfollow. Point being: this blog is THG (and a few personal life updates) ONLY, with a pretty consistent aesthetic. I hide literally everything else that I’m interested in so you don’t have to be bothered by it. Is it really so unacceptable for me to have side-ships (complementary to the main pairing, not threatening to them) in the same universe??

8. Believe it or not, I’ve been working on WtM all along,just not making any massive strides. I tried to chip away at the current chapterduring Camp Nanowrimo last July, and it was a disaster. I thought joining awriting group would be helpful, but I didn’t realize that Camp Nano is basicallya lot of writing sprints in which you try to churn out as many words aspossible, which you then report to your “cabin” – and that’s the onlyinteraction with your fellow writers. I can’t write like that anymore (seeabove) and especially not when it comes to WtM, so I got discouraged veryquickly and sort of drifted away. I reattempted Nano on my own in April and wrotealmost 15K words, but in that instance I was really just using the Nano platform toset and reach a goal (which I didn’t ☹ ); I wasn’t in a cabin and didn’t interact with anyother writers, except my friend @ghtlovesthg, who read the finished portion.

9. I want to finish this dang chapter so much, and frankly, theonly way that’s going to happen is if life gets a little better and I holemyself up with my laptop for hours on end for weeks at a time – and somemagical being comes to support/cheer/comfort me while I do so. It’s currentlysitting at about 25K and I anticipate it will need to be at least double that,which is beyond ridiculous, but that’s the nature of WtM. The chapters are asmany words as it takes.

TL, DR: I still love Everlark and I’m still working on WtM, but my life has been extremely difficult for a very long time and I don’t have a great Everlark lifeline. Gadge and all my other ships are fun, and most of the Gadge you see on my Tumblr is aesthetic stuff for themed days/months/occasions. Anything non-THG goes on my sideblog.

#queued #i'm sorry to be snappy #i understand the confusion #and i'm not happy that i'm not finishing wtm either #ask #gade #side-ships #anon

[sqbr]

Dreamwidth update: Remember when I used to write short gen?

My fics just keep getting longer and longer and it takes SO LONG TO FINISH THEM. The one I'm working on right now is currently at 72K and 18 chapters, with the next chapter basically written and 6K long, and at least another two chapters to come after that. I've been working on it since DECEMBER LAST YEAR. And in some ways it's good! I'm able to explore more complex character dynamics and narrative arcs! (Though remind me to never write an ot6 again, it's like solving a multidimensional algebra problem) I like reading 50K+ fic quite a lot, and it's nice to have my own to go back to. And I like this fic and what it's doing! But GOD I also want it to be DONE so I can WRITE ABOUT SOMETHING OTHER THAN THIS ONE GROUP OF TEENAGERS ANGSTING ABOUT THEIR LOVE LIVES. I mean noone's stopping me from writing something else but I am a very one-foot-in-front-of-the-other sort of writer and this is the path I'm on right now. Hmm, I think I already made a post about this. Probably because I've been feeling this way for SEVEN MONTHS. And God knows how long the next fic will be. I feel like drawing a graph. Like, I don't choose how long my stories will be, I just start them and keep going until they're done, and that length just keeps growing and I don't know when it's going to stop. You know what, I AM drawing a graph. Look at this! It's ridiculous! NINE YEARS of mostly writing 300-2000 word stories with the odd 15K, and suddenly from the end of 2017 it's 30K, 50K, 80K. WHERE WILL IT END.

(Disclaimer: I removed a 50K outlier from 2016 since it was a combination of multiple existing stories, and took me 8 years to write)

And yes, moonvoice, I know your fics are like A MILLION WORDS LONG, but you write faster than me :P Wait, we started dating at the end of 2017. IT'S CONTAGIOUS.

It was interesting looking back on my old fics. While I've been writing the odd 10K+ fic since like 2010, I used to write a lot of much shorter fic, and anything over 1000 words felt substantial. But I haven't written anything under 1000 words since the middle of 2016. I kind of miss writing little drabble-y fic! Maybe I should force myself to get back in the habit.

Also this fic is pretty niche, so I'd complain about it limiting how much feedback I get, except (a) I've still managed to be behind on replying to my comments as it is, and (b) The other ideas I've been getting have been like "Secondary character from a popular 19th century novel shipped with the main character of one nobody has heard of"(*), so.

Ahh, I'll feel better when remixrevival opens in a week and a bit. My art host has been being flaky so I'm a bit worried it'll fall over, but don't really have a better option so I'm just biting my nails. Plus of course my brain is convinced EVERYONE WILL HATE IT even though my art's always at least moderately well received. Once that's crossed off I'll feel more free to sketch silly little ideas. Though the way things are going, I'll be inspired to draw a multi-page comic epic...

...huuh via a misaimed spellcheck I just realised that 'relieved' and 'received' swap their i and e. Nice work, English.

(*)Lucy from Dracula and Daisy from Daisy Miller. THEY'D BE SO GOOD TOGETHER. AND SMOOCH CUTE DUDES AND EACH OTHER AND NOT DIE.

comments

Comment at dreamwidth

#dreamwidth crosspost

[ciucalata]

sptember ‘18 writing progress

total words written: 2,162 most words written in a day: 707 least words written in a day: 0

projects worked on:

- royal klace au

-original wips

-a new romellura roommates fic

-a klance ficlet

september goals:

-write everyday

-continue working on my unpublished wips

-finish the second chapter for Suddenly I See You

-write more ficlets

october goals:

-write 10-15k words

-finish the hunay fic

-start the werewolf lance fic

notes: i am disappointed that my word count for the past two months has been low, but there’s nothing i can do about it but move on so i decided that this month i’ll just keep things more simple compared to my other months’ goals. i just started uni and while someone would think that that might give me less time for writing, i think being out of the house every day and having all the free time between one lesson and another gives me more motivation to actually write. like i’ve written more in these past 3 days, than in weeks. and i am happy with what i wrote which i haven’t felt like this since july or maybe even before that

#monthly writing progress

[canonicallyanxious]

This isn’t the time or the place for it probably, but some conversations and things I’ve been reflecting on in the last few days [mostly wrt my mental/personal health this last year] have gotten me thinking and now i have something i want to get off my chest, which is that i am genuinely very very tired as a fic writer of the way people treat multichap wips

I highly doubt anyone’s really been keeping track, but i haven’t written pretty much any fic for the past two or three months. This is actually incredibly unusual for me, because since i first seriously started writing fic about two years ago the longest gap from working on fic in some capacity, whether that be planning or writing or editing, i’ve taken was maybe a few weeks at most. Obviously most of this recent hiatus has been due to personal mental health issues that i don’t particularly want to get into in this post, but i can’t deny that a significant part of it has also been due to the fact that the last time i worked on a multichapter i burned myself out so badly i had to actually force myself to take a month long break, and THAT was because of all the comments and messages - many of them not directly to me, even - wondering when i was next going to update, if i was ever going to finish the fic, wanting more and more even when i dropped a 15k word update…

you can imagine, probably, that if you’re already someone who’s prone to anxiety, and if these people who express impatience about your work don’t give you feedback when you do post an update, that this might take a toll on you eventually. Might leave you wondering, even, if it’s worth all the sleepless nights and stress and countless hours editing when you end up hating the process of writing rather than loving it, when you want desperately to finish something just so you can finally be done rather than because you want to give the story an ending it deserves, when you never know if what you’ve accomplished is good enough. And because of this, despite the fact that I’m already planning another multichap and a few other fairly substantial au’s, I find myself quite hesitant to put myself through that pressure again.

Now yes, i realize i am not at all entitled to audience response and people can respond to a fic however they want, and i realize we all have pretty painful experiences of a wip we liked being abandoned, and i realize i can’t expect my audience to give me the benefit of the doubt when they know nothing about me. I understand this. However, if you look at my ao3, you can see that in the 2 and a half years I’ve been properly writing fic, every single fic is marked as complete. In my ao3 career i have abandoned exactly two fics. one of them, i posted the rest of the outline on tumblr; the other i still have hopes of returning to one day, and i made sure it stands on its own before i posted it. If i start posting a fic, it’s actually pretty damn unlikely I’m not going to finish it. i have faced all sorts of problems trying to get fic done - writer’s block, time, stress, mental health issues, waning interest in the idea, you name it - but despite all that, my track record for finishing something eventually is pretty good.

You know what is the biggest threat to my ability to finish something, though? More than the time constraints, more than the stress, more than my own anxieties and doubts, more than any of that? The last time i wrote a multichapter, i fully almost quit writing it, like i was genuinely uncertain that i would be able to finish it, twice. Two times, and both times it was because of the immense pressure it takes to push out updates fast enough to keep your audience from wondering where the next update is, why you aren’t being fast enough, and are you even going to update at all?

Here’s the thing. Yeah, there’s never going to be a guarantee that someone will finish a multichapter fic. And i really feel for those who can’t, because it is extremely difficult to write for an audience to begin with, but it is exponentially harder when you aren’t getting paid for it, when you have school and work and a shitton of other life responsibilities and the only way you can fit in fic writing time is by staying up until four in the morning multiple nights in a row, when really the only reward you get for writing and sharing your work aside from the intrinsic motivation is the response people give to your work and sometimes you get no response at all.

i can tell you, though, from personal experience and from talking to many other fic writers, that if an experienced fic writer posts a wip, they are probably reasonably certain they’ll be able to finish it one day. It might take a few weeks; it might take a few years. But if i thought i couldn’t finish a fic, i wouldn’t post it at all [see: the dozens of unfinished drafts i have in my files that never got past the first few paragraphs lol rip]. If you’ve done this fic writing thing enough times, chances are you’ve seen it all. You know your own limitations; you know what it takes to get to the end. And honestly, it’s really disheartening when it feels like your readers don’t have the same faith in you. It really is. Almost makes you believe them, if you hear it for long enough.

And listen, I’m not asking you to respond to a fic if you don’t feel like it. That really is up to you; obviously i encourage you to respond when you can, but again, just as a reader isn’t entitled to a writer’s work, a writer isn’t entitled to a reader’s feedback. What i am asking for is a little bit of empathy. Fic writers aren’t writing fic for profit, for any sort of material benefit other than the pleasure of writing fic about characters they love; it would really help them if you could recognize that, and the incredible accomplishment it is to produce the work they do despite everything that is working against them.

#this is stupid lol #sorry for how long and dumb this is I’m just tired #sarah.txt

[comin-up-for-air]

(I haven’t done this in years but I felt like doing it so here we go) The end of 2017 is near and I decided to rec my favourite fics of the year (which doesn’t necessarily mean that they were written in 2017 but that I’ve read them in this year). Under the cut there are 12 recs, one for each month, I hope you’ll like them as much as I did.

IF GREATER WANT OF SKILL by Emjayelle Rating: Explicit Details: 5k, one-shot, modern!AU, Merlin/Arthur, PWP Summary: Merlin's Friday isn't going to plan, to say the least. Especially when he takes the wrong late-night bus and ends up in Frat Row where he meets Arthur, the annoying frat boy that sits behind him in poetry class, who, by the way, is entirely to blame for the drunkenness, betting, sex, and poetry reciting that follows. Comments: If you think that reading poetry is boring you should definitely read this one. I never knew that Keats could be THIS sexy.

BRINGING ON THE GREAT by Detochkina Rating: Mature Details: 18k, one-shot, modern!AU, Merlin/Arthur, 2016 Summer Olympics Summary: Arthur Pendragon has been on the fast track to Olympic success since childhood, fellow teammate and rival Merlin Emrys keeping Arthur on his toes. Between dueling fathers, doting mothers, and a media frenzy—there’s no room for error in Rio, let alone a romantic relationship. But when Merlin tries to confide to Arthur a secret, one linked to their shared pasts, Arthur needs to decide if his history with Merlin is worth more than gold. Comments: I have a thing for fics where Arthur is an athlete, but those where both Arthur and Merlin are sportsmen are my weakness. Even more when there’s angst (A LOT), repressed feelings and an emotionally constipated Arthur who needs to get his head out of his arse (I’m sorry, I like my Arthur this way). Oh and I was almost forgetting the bonus: there’s also a beautifully jealous Arthur.

PERMANENCE by bevinkathryn Rating: Explicit Details: 3k, one-shot, modern!AU, Merlin/Arthur, PWP Summary: Merlin's inspired, Arthur's sleepy, and on a lazy morning, Arthur's skin becomes Merlin's canvas. Comments: What’s with me and the PWPs this year? I don’t know, anyway this is very short and I can’t actually tell you anything because I might spoil this beauty for you. But it’s worth it, trust me.

PUNK ROCK BOY by silver_etoile Rating: Explicit Details: 31k, one-shot, modern!AU, Merlin/Arthur, highschool!AU, punk!Merlin Summary: There's so much pressure on Arthur to choose the right university (Oxford) and date the right girls (Mithian), but a relationship with the weird punk kid was never in Arthur's plan. When Arthur finds himself in the unfamiliar territory of keeping secrets, he begins to wonder how much of what he thinks is right actually is. Comments: It’s probably because of whimsycatcher’s stunning art, but I’ve come to adore punk!Merlin. Oh and our perfectly posh Arthur can’t possibly be seen hanging out with a punk, right? That’s why this fic is worth a read! But beware, at the end you might not be able to stop imagining Merlin with a silver lip ring.

THINKING THEIR OWN KISSES SIN by helloheartlings Rating: Teen and up audiences Details: 29k, 2 chapters, dystopic!AU, Merlin/Arthur Summary: Love, Arthur had been taught from a very young age, was nothing more than pain and suffering, and the world was much better off without it. Comments: First of all it’s a fic from helloheartlings and that’s already a guarantee of great quality. (It looks like I’m advertising knives and pans on the telly, QVC should hire me). And then it’s an innovative take on the dystopic universe theme. Basically, if you thought that Uther banning magic from Camelot was a shitty way of dealing with the death of his wife, imagine him eliminating emotions so that nobody will have to feel anything anymore. (And once again the award for the worst dad of the year goes to… Uther Pendragon!!!)

LOVE, MERLIN by goodluckgettingtosleep Rating: Mature Details: 66k, one-shot, modern!AU, Merlin/Arthur, slow burn Summary: Merlin and Arthur have been best friends since they were kids, but even though they’re inseparable, life always seems to be getting in their way, separating them against their will. Timing, fate, and life itself seem to have conspired against them and when it comes to love, there always seems to be someone else. Will they ever get their timing right and both realize that they were meant to be together since the beginning of time (quite literally), and that even across time and space, the bond they share can never be severed? A tale of magic, friendship, family, and a love that outlasts centuries. Comments: I should have read the name of the author before I started reading this fic, because it’s long and I had the ill-advised idea of starting it at 10pm. Needless to say I stayed awake to finish it even if I had to wake up at 7am. It’s the kind of fic that gets extra gripping because those two bloody idiots spend 66k words pining for each other and are so oblivious it’s maddening (in their defense I must say that they were downright unlucky). Bonus: Merlin’s the ADORABLE daddy of a fantastic little girl.

WHEN I CLOSE MY EYES by samyazaz Rating: Explicit Details: 11k, one-shot, modern!AU, Merlin/Arthur Summary: Gwaine's parties are the stuff of legend, if his own bragging is to be believed. He holds them every month or so, and he's been trying since freshman year to get Merlin to come to one of them. "C'mon," he always says, wheedling. "You don't know what you're missing. It's not like you're going to be doing anything, anyway." Gwaine thinks anything less than full-blown partying is "not doing anything", and Merlin long ago gave up the fight to convince him that an evening spent in his room with a challenging essay or a good book is actually an enjoyable way to pass the time for him, and not grounds for pity. Merlin's never going to win that battle, and he knows it. Usually, he shrugs Gwaine off. He's heard rumors about what goes on at Gwaine's parties, and mostly, it sounds like what goes on is orgies. Definitely not Merlin's scene. Comments: Reading the first part of this fic gave me the most terrible wave of second-hand embarrassment, Merlin was so out of place at Gwaine’s party. But then our favourite knight in shining armour (also known as Arthur) rescues him and, honestly? One of the best smut fics I ever laid my eyes on. AND the ending was so sweet I couldn’t stop giggling for hours.

SEASONS by wangler Rating: Explicit Details: 40k, 4 chapters, modern!AU, Merlin/Arthur, underage sex Summary: Arthur and Merlin meet in high school. When they're separated after a magic duel gone wrong, hearts are broken, lots emails are written and a few cupcakes are set on fire. Sometimes it takes a while to figure destiny out. Comments: This is kind of a classic? I don’t know, I remember reading it a chapter a couple of years ago and thinking that it was pure gold but then, somehow, I couldn’t find the remaining chapters until last summer. It’s a modern!au with magic, it’s jam packed with angst, Merlin’s too powerful for his own good and I spent the whole time wishing I could give Arthur (who, if I remember correctly, is younger than Merlin in this one) the biggest hug because he really goes through hell. KEPT AWAKE WITH WOLVES TEETH by InkandOwl Rating: Explicit Details: 13k, one-shot, modern!AU, Merlin/Arthur Summary: Merlin and Arthur have one of those friendships where they're just so comfortable with each other they see no problem in sleeping in the same bed together Comments: At this point you already know that I love angst (don’t you say?), but this one is the PERFECT mix of angst and fluff (flangst?). Arthur’s truly a jerk, you might feel the urge to punch him at some point, but he’ll get his head out of his arse at some point, I promise. THE GOOD TIMES ARE KILLING ME by minor_hue Rating: Explicit Details: 15k, modern!AU, Merlin/Arthur, pretend relationship Summary: In which the boys pretend to still be together for Christmas (and there is more than one kind of charade) Comments: This is truly a classic. If the summary sounds familiar to you it means that you’ve already read it (I’m probably the only idiot who’s found it only a couple of months ago), if it doesn’t READ IT. NOW. It’s a masterpiece. The essence of angst with the sweetest ending. I could write poems on this fic, I re-read it once in a while and it never ceases to amaze me.

THE DREAMS INSIDE by winterstorrm Rating: Mature Details: 10k, modern!AU, Merlin/Arthur, Merlin/Morgana Summary: Arthur had always held back, not trusting himself. After all, he'd been in love with Merlin since he was eighteen years old—and Merlin had been with his sister. Now that Morgana was off the scene, could Arthur be blamed for taking his chance with Merlin? Comments: This time it’s Arthur who pines and we get to see it from his point of view. Uther’s a shitty dad with a penchant for blackmailing Arthur and Morgana’s loved ones but, unfortunately for him, Merlin ends up being romantically involved with both.

YOU ONLY LIVE TWICE by storyforsomeone Rating: Explicit Details: 160k, 13 chapters for now (IT’S A WIP), modern!AU, Merlin/Arthur, JamesBond!AU, slow burn Summary: Agent Arthur Pendragon is the best double 0 the agency has seen in decades, trained and honed to be MI6’s finest weapon. He does not need a voice in his ear telling him how to do his job. He does not listen to stubborn geniuses who apparently had no sense of self-preservation and enjoyed baiting professional killers. He certainly does not fall in love with quartermasters with haunting blue-gold eyes and an irritating habit of saving his life. (Or the one where Arthur is 007, Merlin is Q, and they’re both still idiots.) Comments: It’s a WIP so if you don’t read WIPs stay away, but no, please don’t. I never rec WIPs which should speak volumes about how much I love this fic. Arthur is 007, Merlin is Q (no, I’ve never watched James Bond so no previous knowledge is necessary) and they’re both BAMF. The other spies (the knights) are equally awesome. There’s action, humour, incredibly well-potrayed characters, an intriguing plot and, I repeat it, they’re spies, do you need anything else? No, you don’t. Go read this fic.

Every fic is available on AO3 or LiveJournal. I hope the links work, in case they don’t send me a message.

#merlin fic rec #merthur fic rec #merlin fic recs #merthur fic recs

[shadowsong26fic]

Coming Attractions!

First Monday of the month (and year!!), which means it’s time for a Coming Attractions post!

(This has been crossposted to my new Dreamwidth fic archive here.)

So, overall analysis--I didn’t get as much done as I would’ve liked, either over the past month or the year as a whole, but I think I did produce some decent content, so there’s that!

Precipice:

Yep, I’m super behind where I wanted to be, lol…Arc Six took me almost the whole year, damn. Uh. I think what I’ve learned from this experience is next time I plan out an arc, however plot-necessary, that is going to be 99% fluff, I need to re-evaluate my life choices and not do that because this is really super not in my wheelhouse. Not on that kind of sustained level, at least. Saw is also not particularly easy for me to write, so hiding in the other half of the plotline wasn’t really an option either. It probably didn’t help that I changed where I was going with that half partway through (in my original version, he was actually behind the bombing/kidnapping attempt, but then I realized that that made absolutely no sense while he still has custody of Jyn…). Ah, well. At some point, I should probably sit down and reread the entire arc because maybe the finished product, with some distance from the uber-frustrating process, won’t feel as forced/not-good as it does to me now…

Anyway. Now that my whining is out of the way...there’s one more chapter in this arc! It should go up sometime in the next couple days. Featuring the Jedi reuniting and comparing notes; and Padme finally reading her parents and sister in on a few important details. And then we get to Arc Seven, which has had like five working titles over the past month, and I still haven’t settled on one, lol…This arc will pick up roughly three years after Arc Six, and involve more Infernalis, a key turning point with Luke and Lavinia, and Anakin and Leia probably going to Jedha to achieve a specific milestone. (Because I decided to stick closer to canon than Legends on this particular topic and I don’t want to straight-up invent a planet…should be fun!)

As I think I’ve mentioned before, after Arc Seven, (which I’m guessing will be roughly 15 chapters; as amusing as it would be to end these first seven arcs on Chapter 75, there’s way more to cover than I can fit in nine chapters), I’m going to split the fic into another document. Partly for length/convenience--this thing is going to be over 200k by the time I’m done with Arc Seven, I’m 99% sure--and partly because there’s something of a tone/focus shift for arcs 8-14. Also, there’s a longer timeskip than usual--six years between Arcs Seven and Eight. (Which, if you’re counting, you can probably guess what’s behind the shift… :D )

Also, as per usual, I’ll probably do a couple bonus fics this year--not sure when, exactly, or under what context, but I like bonus content.

Other Fanfic Projects:

I’m hoping to actually get back to Distaff and/or Auxiliaries and/or Phoenix!Verse this year. And put out some more Valdemar AU, probably--I do still need to write, at minimum, Hera, Obi-Wan, and Ezra getting Chosen--maybe some more Handler AU, too. Plus an AU outline or two--finishing Let’s Go Steal a Crossover; adding more to Ventress and Her Tiny Time-Travelling Conscience; a few other concepts kicking around in my head...

In terms of other long-form/fulltext projects, I am participating in SWBB again this year, but I’m now finding myself without a plot. I was going to do either our faces like a mirror or the Untitled ObiAniDala AU Epic, but over the past few days I’ve come to the conclusion that these are both massive undertakings and I am vanishingly unlikely to finish even a rough draft of either by the time said rough drafts are due. So, as much as I’d like an extra Incentive to finish OFLAM before the new Clone Wars episodes air and potentially Joss significant chunks of it, this is not going to be it.

The reason for this is that, for OFLAM, I have to do a lot of buildup if I want the ending to pay off. Plus, I have a whole bunch of white space to fill in during the eight years between when Bo comes back to Sundari after the civil war ends and when she leaves to join Death Watch. …most of which would involve that buildup. I mean, I could probably finish the first chunk, which covers Bo-Katan’s experiences while she’s on the run/actually during the civil war, but that doesn’t feel like a complete story to me? (Also, 95% of it would basically be Bo-Katan and miscellaneous OCs, with a brief appearance by Pre Viszla and maybe Jango Fett will turn up? Anyway, I’m not sure that kind of setup is appropriate for challenge purposes.) So I’m reluctant to do that.

(The title for this project, for anyone who’s curious, comes from Vienna Teng’s “Antebellum.” The first verse doesn’t entirely fit, but all the rest…)

As for the Untitled ObiAniDala AU Epic, it, uh. Look, the timeline diverges 25+ years before AOTC. I actually have a lot more of the plot worked out for this one, but it involves a) a crapload of worldbuilding and b) a primary-focus courtship narrative, which is also not super in my wheelhouse. I can do it, I just don’t think I can do it in the couple of months I have, you know? Especially since about half of what I’ve written so far deals with the backstory around the breakpoint, mostly focusing on Bail. The other half does deal with the main plotline, but…yeah.

So, yeah. I’m working to come up with a new concept that is simple enough for me to finish in time but engaging enough to keep me Invested without wandering off into too many recursive AUs, lol. One possibility would be to turn my Bail Unfucks the Timeline AU outline into a fulltext fic, but it doesn’t really have an ending, even in my head…ah, well. I’ll pick something, hopefully soon, and get it done. I do pretty well when I’m working to an externally-imposed deadline, at least…?

Anyway. As a bonus, some teasers for OFLAM and the Untitled AU Epic!

Satine wasn’t in the main audience hall, or our father’s old study. She was, as it turned out, in the little cramped closet of a room she’d always liked, when she was doing homework or writing letters or whatever she decided she needed privacy for.

I took a breath, wondering exactly what I’d find--if she’d changed as much as I had, if she’d…

I shook it off, raised my hand, and tapped on the door four times quickly, then twice slow, just like I always had. To let her know it was me.

I didn’t wait for her to answer, because I couldn’t bear the suspense anymore. (Also, I had never really waited for her to answer, why start now?)

Satine had half risen behind her desk, even paler than usual, and--stars above, her face was a little leaner, her eyes a little darker, but that was my sister. Still my sister, my beautiful, charismatic, powerful older sister.

My Duchess.  -- our faces like a mirror

“Look, you need someone to break into places, I’m your guy. And Ahsoka fits into ventilation shafts,” [Anakin] went on, before Obi-Wan could actually object. “I may not have tried anything as complicated as an Imperial prison, but I can do this. And you’re gonna need all the help you can get.”

“Face it, Obi-Wan,” Ahsoka said. “You don’t get to do the noble lone-wolf Tragic Hero thing on this one. You’re stuck with us.” -- Untitled ObiAniDala AU Epic [based on this prompt from @obianidalasuggestion]

Original Fiction:

Definitely hoping to do more in 2019 than I did in 2018. Starting with writing stuff outside of the big Summer Challenge on rainbowfic…

Goals:

Last year, my goals/New Year’s Resolutions were:

1. Keep up with Precipice updates, complete Arc Seven by the end of September. …yeah, this one, uh. Didn’t happen. 2. Write at least 15k of original fiction Closer to 2k…Lux and Farglass Cycle archives. …nnnnope.

And here are my 2019 goals:

1. Finish Precipice and at least one full arc of Protectors/Precipice II. 2. Write at least 7.5k of origfic content. 3. Start posting OFLAM and/or Untitled ObiAniDala Epic AU. 4. Revive a semi-hiatused fic (Distaff or Auxiliaries or Phoenix!Verse) 5. Update Lux and Farglass Cycle archives, and transfer tumblr archive to DW. 6. At least for AU outline installments of some kind. 7. Complete BB submission, and keep an eye out for other challenges/exchanges/whatever.

#miscellania #coming attractions #shadowsong26fic