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#and the only person who agree w me is my cousin

hollyhomburg · 7 months

Text

Before I Leave You (Pt.60)

(Omegaverse au, Mafia au, Bts x Reader)

Summary: Life changes come in many many forms; courting gifts, leaving jobs, and...Murder

Tags: Slow burn getting warmer, Angst, fluff, hurt/comfort, Trans! Tae, Transphobia, gender thoughts, workplace discrimination, flashbacks, murder, the word 'r*pe' is used to describe what Geumjae did to her but there are no graphic depictions of it, allusions to physical abuse, graphic violence, there is a brief moment where someone not in the pack touches the m/c's ass without her consent, blood, briefly implied suicidal actions- but it's nothing like what you haven't seen before.

W/c: 12.6k

A/n: i'll be attending my cousin's wedding at the time this is posted so! give me lots of love when you read it cuz i'm so nervous~ i've never been around so many fancy people before <3

Previous part ~ Masterlist

You dab at the skin under your eyes carefully. You know they must look red and puffy. Tae’s careful instruction to treat your skin well as all good baby pups should has somehow stuck.

Even here. Even now.

“Do people like always loose it with you? Like when they walk in, do they all cry?”

Your therapist (yes, your therapist) across the narrow room is the opposite of threatening; soft face, pulled back hair, neutral clothing that might just as well be out of a country living catalog.

You don’t know where Jin found her, what little medical booklet he perused like a take-out menu, or how much her services cost per hour. Those kinds of details were not for delicate little pups like yourself to worry over in his opinion.

Most of the time, you're glad not to have to worry about things like this. But right now you're chomping at the bit. Weighting your odds. The other unknowns hover before you. One sticks out. One you're most concerned about.

Is she trustworthy?

Nothing about Dr. Rima seems outwardly threatening, yet you curl in on yourself. She smiles, scrawling something on the top of her notepad before she answers, and something taught in you ticks tighter.

“You’re correct in assuming that most people I meet cry in the first few minutes when they meet me, but you are the first person to cry on my threshold. Most of the time people wait until they’re at least in the chair.”

That has a smile tugging at your lips, albeit unwillingly. Your smile is like a leashed wild animal, with too many teeth when you feel threatened. Contained for now.

If you got up and walked out right now, would she call someone to restrain you? Will you be committed if you tell the truth? Or are you just misinterpreting the stakes?

You are here of your own volition. Even if it was a condition that Jin and Namjoon weren't willing to budge on after the events of last week. It's not like the pack is having you put in a mental institution or something, although they did come with you today. For moral support.

The waiting room was stuffy and yellow, one of those little waterfall mirrors in the corner that you’d watched in a fog sat between Yoongi and Jimin while Jin filled out the necessary paperwork. His pen hovering over the small boxes every few seconds. He'd taken the afternoon off of work to make sure he was there, just to fill out paperwork.

Are you on any medications? Do you have a history with substance abuse disorders? Do you have any intent to harm yourself or others?

Sending glares to anyone who dared to come too close, Jimin had looked and smelled threatening. You're not sure he’d have let you go into an isolated location with her if she’d been an alpha. Jin too had looked close to snapping.

yoongi was the only one who looked somewhat calm, althoug his hand was tightly laced with yours (and a little sweaty)

It’s a wonder that the rest of your pack had agreed to stay home for this. This was just one of several concessions you’d made after what the pack has politely begun referring to as 'sad pup time' during your more vulnerable moments, and blatantly 'your breakdown' during less fragile ones.

But sweet words or not. The facts remain; You are here in this chair after a nearly tearful departure.

You’d met the therapist in the doorway, shaking in your boots, and upon being separated from your pack with the promise that they’d be just downstairs in the lobby, you’d followed her inside.

Yoongi had made a noise in his throat, making you turn back. Dr.Rima turned to watch as he’d pulled you in for a last-minute hug, ducking down to your level. “One hour, okay? We’ll be just downstairs. Text me if you need me.”

His eyes were heavy-looking at the stranger. Unwilling to let you go just yet. A little stalwart, a little standoffish.

“Take good care of her please. She’s very precious to us.”

Precious.

That much was evident by the nearly three-page document that both your pack alpha and omega sent through once Namjoon and Jin had selected Dr. Rima as your therapist. Dr. Rima has quite a bit of experience dealing with overprotective pack alphas and pack omegas. Let alone a pack alpha and pack omega who have such a clinical background.

Yes, you must be well taken care of. At least on paper.

She’s already itching a little, to get her hands on all the others. Packmates and their names are written out, as a part of all intake files. Large packs aren't so common anymore. Her eyes fix on one name; Min Yoongi (beta, mate) unemployed.

The big windows help it feel not so small, on the second floor, the trees block out most of the view of the park below. A small voice that sounds like Hobi whispers that it’s a shame she doesn’t have any plants in here, they'd do so well with all of this natural light.

Your knees clack together a little, moving listlessly, the anxiety in your body begging to be released somewhere.

“I don’t know where to start.”

“Why don’t we start with why you wanted to come in today.”

You avoid her eye contact, looking instead at the tops of the trees, you don’t know why they haven’t changed color yet, all of the trees on your street are half bare already. She has a smooth inoffensive scent, but you’re mated to a beta so you know what to expect when it comes to the relaxing effects, the subtle haze at the edge of your vision. It must come in handy, having the biological upper hand, when it comes to patients in distress.

If therapists are rare, beta therapists must be even rarer.

You can practically hear Jin, “Nothing but the best for my pup.” There is a part of your brain that won’t ever turn off, appraising everything around you. The designer pumps that she wears. The knickknacks on her desks, there are no photos of any packs that she might call her own, just a pink calendar in the corner.

Your breath goes just a little bit rapid, just a little, hitching when you think of it.

“Did Jin tell you anything?”

“He didn’t. Although my secretary did inform me that he filled out the paperwork for you.” The air in the therapist’s office is cold. Cold enough that it has you wrapping your sweater sleeves over your knuckles.

Your cheeks heat “My pack they- get a bit- protective.” Your fingers circle your wrist. You’re glad that Hobi convinced you to take one of his sweatshirts. He'd had a strange look on his face while he zipped it up, and you'd had to worry and wonder about it the whole morning. You'd worried more once he texted, just after he must have gotten to work.

“I have kind of a history of self-destructive behavior and I- I kind fell into bad habits a few days ago and blew up. It was all kind of triggered by this like- thing that happened with me and my other packmate.” It’s surprisingly easy to tell the truth.

You’re a right side better than you have been the last few weeks, now. A little bit more present, less foggy. The doctor just looks at her screen and not at you. What is it with her asking questions that make you not want to lie? Why does it feel like you should anyway?

Dr. Rima reads between the lines, what you're trying to say without saying it. “Is there a possibility of you hurting yourself again?” She clicks at the screen a little rapidly.

“No.”

The truth is you have no idea. It seems best to lie in this situation. But you consider it; one of your packmates making the call that you are too much to handle, that you need more help than they can offer. You imagine what it would be like to be in inpatient care. Grippy socks and group therapy and probably observed mealtimes. Maybe Iv's and feeding tubes if it came to that. Away from the pack and away from Yoongi.

He’s just downstairs, but that feels too far. There was no way that he was going to let you do this alone, you wouldn't be surprised if he never left the waiting room.

It’s just a therapy session. The very thing that you once refused. But now that you're here you might as well heal, you might as well work to stop this endless train of brief highs and endless lows. you'll give it a go, why not? What do you have to lose?

And yet, the texts from Hobi remain unanswered:

Ho-🐝 (9:48): Hey, I’m really proud of you.

Ho-🐝 (9:48): I’m really happy I get to be your packmate. In case you ever worry.

Ho-🐝 (9:49): And your best friend too <3

Ho-🐝 (9:51): Just so you knowwww

The pack has kept you substantially plied with little solutions since your breakdown last week. They haven’t let you rot like usual. They’ve kept your days full of little activities; nothing too extravagant or tiring. Letting you rest when you need to and encouraging you to get outside of your comfort zone when it’s clear you’re giving in.

It comes down to that more often than not; giving in or not giving in.

Not giving in looks like trips back to the beach with Hobi. Like going to the salon with Tae and shopping with Jimin. Or another workout class with Jungkook where you’d spent more of the time lounging on the yoga mat than actually moving your body. But you'd still tenuously agreed to sign up for more classes under the encouragement of Wonho and Jungkook.

And now twice a week, you’ve got a mat to call your own during any classes, in the back, if you decide you want it. Your callender hasn't felt so full in years, it feels strange, to have something to do during the weeks that isn't just scraping the bottom of the barrel and doing house chores. Strange in a good way.

Not all of the pack's solutions aren’t silly but sometimes, silly is a good way to push out the dark.

The morning after your breakdown; you'd watched your pack work, fighting back a flush. Sitting at the kitchen bar stool while Yoongi applied painter’s tape to the floor, not intent on keeping back paint this time, but marking it off for you.

You’re a little bit more determined this morning although your first night without nightmares in a little over a month had kept you in higher spirits. You feel more well-rested than you have in ages.

“You don’t need to- I promise- I’m not going-“ but your requests had fallen on deaf ears. Worry building until Jungkook stood up fast grinning up at you, pupils wide brown pools from getting scented stupid this morning.

(Scented stupid, you'd been scented by the pack too, had struggled a little against it, too shy as Namjoon dragged his throat along yours, squirming until yoongi held you down a little, checking with you each few seconds that you wanted that, that your squirming was really just needing to feel a firm touch, a dominant one.

You will go nowhere until your pack have had their right to you, scenting you up, making your scent gland tender and swollen under their teeths and tongues.

It felt so much better to be made to handle it, each of the pack, even hobi, hovering over you to scent you with their wrists and throats. until you smelled so claimed by them that you couldn't breathe without smelling it- Pack.

Jungkook had pouted until he'd gotten the same treatment, although the omegaspace haze had lasted longer on him than it had on you.

He stands up so fast that his hair fluffs. Catching himself on your leg with a giggle before he topples over. grinning up at you before pressing a sleepy sloppy kiss to your knee and then another to your lips,

“No pup zone!" Omega Space Jungkook can get a little bit ridiculous even at the best of times. He's got a case of the morning omegaspace zoomies as he giggles and nips at your nose. You playfully push at his chest. He doesn't budge.

"Your whole face is a no-pup zone." The dissatisfied pur-chirp he'd let out had sounded half hurt, half encouraged.

Namjoon had eased your discomfort. Pulling you from the stool to lean back against his chest, fingers drumming out a rhythm on your legs as Jungkook huffes into your throat.

Having this failsafe- this rule, does not mean that they think you’re going to fail, these are guard rails to keep you on track. Namjoon looks down at you, his full bottom lip tucked a little, not a pout but close. “This is the easiest solution, if you don’t go near it then maybe, maybe it helps.”

His fingers drum against your skin again, and you lean back into him. Uneasy but willing to let him soothe you.

So yes, you’ve been banned from the kitchen, banned from crossing that line that runs from the edge of the coffee stand and just in front of Tae's library room, to the island and over to the fridge. Unless there is someone else close by. You are not allowed here without supervision.

It’s a simple solution, limiting you from the place that you use to hurt yourself. Never mind the fact that there are dozens if not hundreds of other possible avenues you could use. Your creativity knows no bounds when it comes to pain, but you quiet that part of yourself when the desire for hurt gets loud.

You can’t say it hasn’t helped. But then again, the pack has kept you so busy since your breakdown that you haven't had any time to think of hurting yourself let alone put any plans into action.

Across from you, Dr. Rima waits expectantly.

"It was kind of triggered by this thing that happened."

The tip of her pen bobs a little as she writes. “Could you describe the event to me? Or is that something you're not ready to talk about?" You nod and she waits patiently. It takes you a breath to answer.

“A little less than a month ago one of my packmates and I found a dead body."

You feel a little vindicated at her inhale of breath. Wide eyes that say yes- that is something traumatic, yes, it's fair that it kinda triggered you into a more fragile state.

"It dredged up a lot of feelings about my past. Before that, I was kind of starting to feel s-safe which I haven't like, ever been able to feel."

“And your packmate?"

There is new treacherous wetness balancing on your waterline. “Hobi’s a lot stronger than me, his past and mine are really similar but he just- handles his better. A lot of the time it feels like I learn from him even though he’d tell you the opposite is true. He’s my best friend." Your voice goes quiet, "I love my mate more than I love anyone else, but sometimes- Hobi just- gets me you know?" You go a little misty-eyed. Hands tightening on Hobi's sweatshirt.

“Yet he’s not the one sitting in my chair right now.”

You close your eyes, "he's not."

“For what it’s worth- you can have more than one best friend.” Dr. Rima writes as quickly as she can, taking it down. “How long have you been romantically involved with him? Who came first, your mate or him?”

You jolt forward, “Oh no- we’re not- Hobi and I aren't-" You take a deep breath to clarify. "Everyone else in the pack is together but Hobi and I are just friends. We all have our like… little units?”

"Primary partners." Dr. Rima offers.

"Yeah, that." But even that doesn't really cover it, because while Jin and Namjoon are JinandNamjoon and Jimin and Tae are JiminandTae. Jungkook is everyone's problem (in the best of ways) and you and Tae are something else too. The pack's girls the rest of them would say.

(You and Hobi are, well, YouandHobi.)

It sounds weird to say it once it comes out of your mouth. It makes an odd choked feeling lodge in your throat. Too much hope and too much shame for hoping blooming in your chest.

“I don’t know if I want to talk about him.”

She folds her hands over her knees, setting her pen down. Dr. Rima has chubby hands, disproportionate to her body. They look like they'd be soft.

She reminds you of your mom a little bit.

“That’s okay, we can talk about whatever you want. What you want and need is going to be the focus of our sessions. You’re the pilot here. I’m just here to help you interpret your thoughts and feelings.”

She folds her hands over themselves, setting her pen aside, “Why don’t we talk about the last time you remember feeling safe.”

"Physically or mentally?"

"Either, you can choose."

The rest of the session passes frightfully quickly. You can’t say that you don’t cry again. When you finally talk about Geumjae, her smile quickly dissipates. You talk and talk and talk until your throat is raw. Until you’ve depleted the whole box of her tissues. She shows you she's got more hidden under her desk when you apologize, her secret stash gets a laugh out of you.

“The fact that your pack omega filled out your paperwork isn’t the most unusual, but his preference for daily meetings or every other day is a little bit on the nose for a pack omega, I’m wondering if you share his preference.”

“He’s just overprotective.” She eyes you like Jin has good reason to be. You don’t blush this time, a little more comfortable with Dr. Rima than you were at the beginning of this. “I think maybe more than once a week but not every day.”

“How does Monday- Friday sound?”

~-~

When you walk to the door with Dr. Rima Yoongi stands abruptly from his chair.

You can tell by the shiny edge to his to his scent that he doesn't want to stay here any longer than necessary. He gets the information about your next appointment and then tugs you out the door.

Jins got his legs crossed, fancy leather shoes glinting in the sunlight by the windows. The lobby is buzzing with people coming and going. This building isn't just a therapy office but a collection of other businesses with a few shops and restaurants on the ground floor as well. He looks up and double-takes when he spots you, not standing from his chair, but he opens his arms and you fold yourself along his side, conscious of the other eyes but this.

This you need.

You press your face along the column of Jin's neck, breathing his cream scent in deep.

“Oh pup.”

Your red-rimmed eyes are too obvious and you sniffle wetly, “It was okay, I like Dr. Rima.” He laces your hands together and resists the urge to pester you with questions. Yoongi's hand is still tangled in the hood of your (Hobi's) sweatshirt. Your therapy sessions should be yours and only yours. Yoongi and Jin do not have Dr. patient confidentiality.

And yet the need to know if that helped burns through them. They won't have to wonder for long.

By the coffee stand, Jimin waves and he returns to you when the barista hands over a bag of sweets and a quad of cups. Jin continues scrawling something out for another second before he’s standing and pulling you in for another chaste scent mark.

“Let’s go home.” It's somewhere between an order and a request. But no one disobeys.

On the drive back (37 minutes total) you're a little quiet. You let the sounds of the others be your buffer. You look down at your phone and stare at Hobi’s texts. You respond with just a little heart emoji when you finally still can’t figure out a good response and you're close to home.

Home is its usual conflagration of moving bits and pieces. Each of your packmates is like a shiny cog in a pretty clock, tick tick tick tocking along. Tae and Namjoon are at the table looking through some of the pack’s bills, the pastries and coffee cups litter the table with little piles of powdered sugar and cinnamon. jimin bought enough for the whole pack.

You look at them a little too long, although not because you don't want to eat them. It’s been a while, a few weeks since you’ve made something like that, but every single one of the pastries is something you know how to make. You don’t know why you keep looking at them.

Tae smiles at you, still in the doorway. and it makes you feel a little less like you want to burst into tears. Her voice speaks of the quiet time you have in the library (the tenderness of having someone else do your makeup, another person combing your hair). You hope you'll get some dedicated one-on-one time with her soon.

"Hey little lovely, How was it?"

"She put me through the wringer but I think she got some suds out."

She and Namjoon giggle and you smile small. and you can tell that Namjoon wants to ask you more but he doesn't after a pointed look from your mate. There are footsteps in the hall and before you can move to take off your shoes Hobi is standing in the archway.

Yoongi efficiently strips you of Hobi's sweatshirt with a frustrated huff. It's Kind of like he’s trying to peel away the sadness (your clothes are soaked with your sour scent, rainy and unhappy. Regardless of Jin’s scent mark, you kind of stink).

You might have overheard their words just before you got into the car. Jin's hissed admonishment. “A lot of people cry during therapy Minnie, she’s not in trouble, can’t you smell it?”

Your scent is mellow underneath the memory of your distress, going sweeter by the second. Yoongi wants all memories of your sad scent banished from the house. Hobi stands at the door to the hallway, shifting back and forth, his eyes a little warmer than usual, hands shaking a little bit.

You’ve caught him looking at you a lot since the night he ran away, in the quiet moments when he thinks you’re not noticing. Eyes a shade warmer than usual, a sweetened franticness to his scent. Nervousness and happiness mix like blueberries and whipped cream.

When he pulls up beside you during movie nights and sits thigh to thigh with you. When his hands intertwine with yours over his knee or sometimes or when he pulls your legs sideways across his lap. He looks at you like that when he's doing the small things and he's looking at you like that right now.

You know how love starts, that it starts with the small things.

Hobi resists the urge to open his arms. would you come to him? Would you fold your body along his front so that he could feel your heartbeat? Pressing again and again to the opposite side of his chest with every thump?

He doesn’t say hey, but he does step a little closer. Fingers reaching out. The pad of his index finger slides down the meat of your pinky till it reaches the ball of your wrist. His own special hello.

Your breath hitches, just barely, almost imperceptible if it wasn’t for how close he stands.

A look behind you says Yoongi hasn’t made himself scarce, instead fussing with the pack's coats. Now that it’s getting colder, they don’t all fit by the door. You look behind Hobi and find Namjoon watching the three of you, he raises a singular eyebrow.

“How was it? Bad?” Hobi asks, breaking the silence and the tension, drawing your attention back to him. The next breath you let out is a lot less heavy, and your eyelashes flutter as he steps closer. Hobi smells good, a little earthy, mellowing out his usual sweetness. Sweet for an alpha.

“It was kind of hard, I kinda wanted to run away for a bit at the beginning." You can't keep meeting his eyes with how intensely he's looking at you and they flutter down to his hands. "I almost did.”

"I'm glad you didn't pup." Jin comments, full of reproach, the mirror to you and Hobi as he leans down to press a kiss to Namjoon's forehead. Shucking off his lapelled jacket and rolling up the sleeves of his button-down shirt.

“If you’d have called me, I’d have picked you up. We could still like- run away, if you're down.”

But the house is starting to heat up, and Jin and Yoongi are starting to cook. The light is still honey-yellow happy. And you tip your cheek into his arm. He finally- finally lets his arms settle around your waist.

“Nah, not yet.” You drag out the syllable all playful, and something forbidden stirs in Hobi’s gut. “Jin’s making my favorite tonight. not until later?”

Hobi goes silent, pulls back, biting his lips, eyes flickering from your eyes down. and-

You laugh and Hobi blushes. “Just spit it out.”

Everyone’s been a little bit touchier with you since that night (a little more overbearing too). You won’t immediately chalk Hobi's touchyness up to what you're all thinking. But the affection makes your scent gland feel tender. Zinging when Yoongi steps up behind you and nuzzles into it, huffing again.

Friends can hug each other after therapy right? Hobi swallows thickly and you feel it against your collar bone as he pulls back and steps away from you. “I ugh- got you a present?”

You brighten up instantly, and Hobi's anxiety increases tenfold. A bit of casual mischievousness on the edge of your lips that always have Hobi feeling like he’s being teased even though he knows he isn’t.

“Oh? A present? You’ve never gotten me a present before!”

He kicks at imaginary dust bunnies, fighting back what he knows is a noticeable flush. “I ugh- still owe you, from the car you know and honestly it's not even like a big gift it's like- so small in comparison and-”

Yoongi huffs and continues to disrobe you. Pulling your sweater over your head when he’s not satisfied that your unhappy scent has dissipated. Muttering something like. “hopeless alpha” under his breath. Your tank top pulls up, inches of your hip and skin on display. It's nothing that Hobi hasn't seen before and yet the blush reignites. The sunshine to your morning glory.

“I guess you're right.” But it doesn’t feel like it. Hobi doesn’t owe you anything for that, not when it was so easy to give. Not when you’ve gotten so many late-night drives from that gift.

Hoseok got the idea for your courting gift, one morning while watching you say goodbye to Namjoon:

The pack alpha has always been a fan of goodbye kisses, good morning, and goodnight kisses too. The particular kiss that morning had ‘I’ll miss you’ written all over it. It was so pretty in the way that you lingered, arms around Namjoon’s neck. His hand is underneath your shirt on the small of your back. Such a small touch and yet so gently possessive that it had Hobi aching to see it.

Hobi is unfortunately prone to jealousy and it turns the back of his neck hot. Makes his hands feel oddly tender. He's distracted by the visual, the task of packing up his work bag forgotten. Hoseok’s shift at the flower shop doesn’t start for another few hours, and he’s waiting, watching, an unhappy voyeur.

You and Namjoon have quite the height difference, if he was in between the two of you he’d be the perfect middle ground. That’s just another stupid thought, another stupid thought in the countless number of stupid thoughts that he’s had. (I like my alphas a little pathetic, and nothing's more pathetic than an alpha pining after an omega.)

He grumbles.

Yoongi prattles on, more awake than all of them as he outlines what you have to do today to make progress on the house- which is to go find a place that sells cheaper tile than the ones you first thought of using in the bathroom on the first floor. And maybe change it up a little.

The bathrooms escaped the renovations somehow, and a few nights ago- Jimin had admitted how much they actually use it even though it’s not the pack's primary bathroom anymore. Now that it’s not in use, they’re more willing to part with it for a few days for some very necessary re-styling. it toes the line from vintage to old a little too hard. The yellow is a little…yellow.

Yoongi wants to go light and airy with the color scheme, like he did with the upstairs bathroom and it's seafoam and brown tones. But like with most of the house, your vote is for colorful. “How about a light blue-” Yoongi continues to argue while you kiss Namjoon a little senseless in the doorway, at least Namjoon seems properly dazed, chasing your lips when you pull apart.

“No- we don’t have a room that’s magenta yet!”

This starts the same argument as always; “We can’t make every room in this house pink for Tae.”

But goodbyes take precedence, and when you turn back and smile at Hobi he flushes, shy to be caught looking. He moves, stepping around you and Namjoon to put his water bottle into his bag when you shout, “Stop, Seokie!”

Seokie is a new nickname, one that Jin only uses in the quietest of moments that you've somehow adopted when you don't want to call him Hobi. Hobi always thought that if you’d use any other nickname with him- you’d use daisy (he might want you and yoongi to share that pet name). But he’s a good pup and stops what he’s doing. Every atom in his body every electron no longer circulates neutrons but circulates you instead. Pulled in by your gravity.

You’ve moved so suddenly that you’ve spilled a bit of your coffee onto the floor. Maybe kissing Namjoon has left you feeling a little dizzy too. Yoongi just sighs fondly and wipes it up. Jimin looks up from his phone, smiling when he sees.

“You’ve got a rainbow on your cheek.”

It’s a trick of the light, early morning sunshine refracted through the mottled window just right to cast a single rainbow on the wall and on Hobi when he steps in front of it.

You cup his cheek, finger skimming across where the rainbow sits.

"Pretty."

Hobi feels hot all over.

At Tae’s call of, “If I have to do my eyeliner one more time I’m going to scream!” You giggle and dart away from him. Going to tend to Tae with a soft reply of "I've got you baby."

Hoseok is left, blushing in the morning light. Staying still like you might come by and cup his cheek again, Like a flower staying still in the hope of pollination.

Hobi is left, wanting to scream and somehow demand you back, both would be fair. His plight isn't missed by his packmates, who lean in like a set of jackals, grinning ear to ear at hobi's flustered predicament.

She's going to send him into rut if she's not careful Jin thinks, but doesn't say. instead he teases, “You’ve got to leave in the next ten-minute Hobi.”

Only then does Hoseok move- released from his spell and finally losing the rainbow on his cheeks though they might as well have stayed with how happy and warm he feels. How absolutely incandescent the love is glowing in his chest. A full spectrum of feelings, longing for you to come back.

He almost trips over noodle, darting after you with his tail raised high, catching himself on the edge of the couch at the last second, one shoe on and one off, his water bottle falling and spilling in the process.

yoongi sighs, and stoops to wipe it up. Jimin giggles and pulls Hobi up by his hips, the alpha's fingers feel hot where they've touched him, scalding. “What’s wrong, omega got your tongue?” yoongi returns to his breakfast, throwing the wad of soggy paper towels into the trash.

Jungkook laughs, “It’s more like he wants an omega to have his tongue in her-“

“You guys are gross,” He pushes at Jimin’s shoulder finally moving right. Yoongi hides his smile in a mouthful of Captain Crunch.

Hobi doesn’t think about the rainbows again until his next afternoon shift. When the low angle of the autumn sun cuts through the windows and catches the suncatchers that they hang in the doorway of the flower shop and cast more rainbows- dozens of them really across him and the flower.

He remembers when you came to visit, how you'd lingered over them, looked at them a second longer than you looked at the plants.

It’s a bit of a kitschy display. Other polished stones and nick nacks sitting on the deep shelf along with some smaller potted plants. A little tray of rose-quartz stones falsely advertises themselves as ‘heat reducers.’

The colors start to blend, and the rainbows sway softly in the light, gentle and pretty. He snaps a photo and thinks about sending it to you, but doesn’t.

The store is blissfully empty of Hobi's coworkers when he selects three of them. It's quiet when he packages them in tissue paper, one with a huge pink stained-glass moon at the top, another with three tiers. Each of them is delicate and pretty in their own right. No one’s bought a single one of them in the last three months anyway. They'll hardly be missed. Hobi gives himself a fat employee discount.

Hobi is unfortunately bad at hiding things, especially when he's nervous. Luckily the pack alpha doesn’t have it in him to tease. Namjoon had in fact been only too encouraging and given him a pep talk just this morning about courting and courting presents.

“The worst that can happen is that she doesn’t like it- and then you just have to try again which you were already planning on doing anyway.” Namjoon is quite simply the best at courting. It doesn't matter which subgender; alphas, beta’s, and omegas have all fallen under his touch. At least Hoseok has the opportunity to learn from a professional. Somehow the thought that you'd compare him to namjoon doesn't cross his mind.

Hoseok isn’t good at the romantic gestures that courting necessitates. He’s more of the ‘there when you need him’ kind of lover. Ready to make the small changes to make his loved ones' lives more manageable. Ready with his car keys for adventures. Those parts are easy, this is out of his depth.

Especially when it comes to you. Even After the love confessions, (are confessions still confessions if they’re so internal?) Hobi feels mostly unmoored. About to shatter upon unknown shores.

God, crushes are so frustrating (in the best kind of way, the way that keeps you sighing and daydreaming, the kind of way that makes you look in the mirror a little longer).

Tae helped him half an hour before she started on the pack's paperwork. They'd spent an hour deciding which places were best to hang them to get the greatest number of rainbows. She had even fussed with his hair a little to make it lie right. Having him hop up on the couch so she could see Hobi's face from your angle.

Hobi wanted to make sure there were at least one or two rainbows when he shows you. But when he leads you to the sunroom, his hands over your eyes (the same position you found yourself in when Namjoon surprised you with the nesting pod) there are more of them than there were when he set them up, whole constellations swaying softly.

The suncatchers are pretty and twinkly sparkly in the golden hour light, and your lips part in a simple show of awe when Hobi tells you you can open your eyes. It's so bright, they send dozens of little rainbows across the walls and your nesting pod. Over the white couch and the fig in the corner.

It’s very very pretty. and when you turn back to look a thim, Hobi once again has a rainbow on his cheek.

Your eyes twinkle, but you don't say anything. you stay quiet for long enough that Hobi gets nervous. his anxiety makes him talk fast. “I hung them here- but you can put them wherever you want- in the kitchen or upstairs or I can get you more for any places you want to put them- or- or- ”

You just about tackle him, arms looping around his neck resting your weight in his arms that instinctively grip around your waist. Hobi teeters, unsteady with such a heavy heart, toppling both of you onto the couch as you cry. "I love it!"

You’re sprawled not lying across him but his hand goes out to support the way you cling and rub your face into his chest, a happy little chirp slipping past your lips.

The wild thing in Hobi’s chest settles, settles, and curls around you. Tight and protective like a vice. You pull back, and your smile is just as bright.

Hobi sags, and rests his neck back against the couch, "Good- thank fucking god- I was so fucking nervous-" You fiddle with the buttons on his flannel, it's one of Yoongi's. It seems fitting that you steal his clothes and he steals Yoongi's.

"What brought all this on?"

Hobi doesn't have a good answer, in the quiet with the rainbows, or at least an answer he's ready for. He doesn't say that this is a courting present, and he doesn't need to because instead of answering your question- he replies with one of his own.

“Wanna go for a drive later?” he asks, voice tremulous like he thinks you might refuse him. You’ve never said no to him before, never said not tonight only not right now. Do you treasure our little talks the same way I do?

“Sure, after dinner? like I said? Just-" You lean back against his chest, and Hobi’s hands go tight tight tight around your waist. Holding you close. Clingy. He does not slip his hand under your shirt to cup the side of your hip the way that Namjoon might, but the thought crosses his mind.

Hobi is a good alpha, he won't cross that line until you tell him it's okay. Until then a thin layer of fabric separates his skin from yours. You're still warm to the couch.

“Sit and watch them with me?” You ask quietly. Almost shy, like you think he’d refuse you. He nods and the two of you sit on the couch to look at the rainbows together.

Eventually, Noodle finds the two of you, meowing and hopping up to stretch out along your thighs. Worming his way between the two of you.

The rainbows don't last forever, but Hobi sits with you until they fade.

~-~

Tae’s library is just like every public library:

Tall windows, wide quiet shelves with room for the stories to breathe. A colorful young adult section and an even more colorful kid’s section. A bit aways from the tables and computers so that any over-excited pups don’t disturb the adults. Big deep beanbags for small children to cuddle up to while they ponder fairy tales and adventures only a plastic-covered book away.

Tae’s long plaid skirt barely makes a whisper along the ground. The colder weather has allowed her to live all of her cottage core fantasies, her dark academia aesthetic truly flourishing. Her shirt is a little translucent today, and the fading summer tan of her skin pokes through it in spots where her tank top doesn't hide. Pretty long earrings dangle and clink in the quiet while she works on her shelving.

Wearing her chosen clothing items at work has been a bit of a work in progress.

Most of Tae’s coworkers approve of her transition in that overly willing-to-be-an-ally way that middle-aged women who generally consider themselves progressive outside of closed doors all do. And the ones that don’t approve have swallowed their words with lingering sour eyes and raised upper lips after the general receptiveness to Tae’s social transition.

It's hard to know who's genuine with it, who just doesn't want to cause a fuss, and who just doesn't give a shit. But most of the time her outfits get one or two compliments and thats it. Tae would rather them say nothing than anything negitive.

Tae likes the quiet of the library at this time of day, the silence gives her enough room to let her imagination wander. Tae likes to file away books in mid-morning, when there are fewer people around and her humming is less likely to disturb any of the library’s patrons. She sings to the stories and they sing back, tempting her with every well-worded title and delicately chaste summary.

But she doesn’t just think about stories or the book she's writing (her book is currently giving her hell on the 30th chapter) No. Today- there is a much more interesting love story blooming in her head, in the pack's den too.

She’s been thinking about you all morning (Tae thinks about you almost every morning) there are even little poems scrawled on the edge of her newspaper. Lines that are you and a bit of Hobi too.

I wished that I might be your hair clip / to know what it feels like / to be pressed against the nape of your neck/ To be your suntan/ perched on the edge/ of what you show everyone and what you show no one/ To be the bearer of every freckle/ like the sky holds the stars/ To hold and never let go/ Like birds hold sunshine / and flowers hold songs.

Everyone had noticed of course, how much time you and Hobi have been spending together.

The pack had even talked about it during a quiet moment without you and Hobi. Yoongi’s lack of communication regarding you and Hobi. “I don’t know anything” he’d unsuccessfully lied, and nearly been heaved up and wrestled to the couch as a result. But Jungkook’s puppy eyes had unsuccessfully endeared him.

Yoongi has kept Hobi's secret, but it's kind of hard not to notice. Tae isn't a fool. Tae is a much better liar than Yoongi is- because when you'd come to her after your late-night drive to gush with her about Hobi and the rainbows over makeup. She hadn't said anything about what she knows.

Tae couldn’t tell you how many times she’d noticed little touches, Hobi’s hand lingering on the small of your back, grabbing your waist when he moved behind you in the bathroom. When he take the greatest care to set out his sweatshirts in the morning and even asks Jungkook to make sure they’re clean. They’re practically not even his sweatshirts anymore with the amount you’ve been wearing them.

Tae isn’t an idiot, she knows that Hobi’s finally realized it. While she doesn’t trust herself to play matchmaker given how poorly the first time she pointed out Hobi’s attraction went. that doesn’t mean she’s not going to park herself firmly on the edge of her fantasy land with a box of popcorn.

If they were gonna get married, would Hobi wear a red tux or black or grey? Her brain is already thinking of wedding dresses. One of these days she’s really going to have to make a Pinterest board. Hobi would probably want to do sunflowers, and that might clash with the red unless it was a fall wedding- ooh, and what about pearl details and daisies? a beach wedding might be a little too on the nose for you.

Tae is so absorbed with her shelving and her daydreaming that she doesn’t notice the sound of small shoes on the carpeted floor. Nor does she notice the light-up flash of tiny iorn man sneakers. Her musings are easily interrupted by a small tug on her skirt, shy almost. She startles a little, looking down at the sudden touch.

The little pup's thumb is wet from where it was clearly placed behind their bucked teeth. He's got wide brown eyes and soft-looking hair, Tae can't stop the smile that comes to her lips.

“I wanted to read a book but I couldn’t reach, can you help me? Please?”

Tae’s heart swells as she leans down to the pup's level. “Of course, I can! Why don’t you show me what one you wanted,” diligently Tae follows the little one a few isles over, tugged along by their insistent pulling as he tells her about the pretty cover.

The little pup turns back, furrowing his bushy brows up at Tae, “are you a princess?” he asks. Tae almost has to laugh, a bright happy gender euphoric feeling filling her chest, that feeling of I could be filling her.

She makes her whisper just a little more hushed, playing along, “Don’t tell anyone okay? It's a secret.” The little pup nods, eyes darting around like there are dragons that would threaten her.

“What gave me away?”

“Princesses wear long skirts!” the pup says cheerfully, like it makes the most sense in the world. He's a little too loud and Tae winces. He finally finds the shelve with the story. The spine glimmers pink and gold and Tae is unsurprised to find the illustrated copy of Cinderella. Not the Disney or PJ version, but the Brothers Grimm version.

Tae cringes at the pair of doves on the cover.

Tae doesn’t say that the little pup is too small to read a book so big, or that there is one with more pictures much more appropriate away from the young adult section. The child can’t be more than 6 years old.

But still, Tae retrieves it and delivers it to their waiting arms. The little one clutches it to his chest, thanks Tae, and then promptly plops themselves onto the carpeted floor right there.

He opens the first page, huffs, and then looks up at her imploringly.

“I just realized I can’t read.”

He pouts and Tae melts. Tae wonders where the pup's mother is, but really, there certainly can't be much harm in this. This isn't the first time Tae has been guilted into reading a story to a pup while their parents work or make use of the library's computers.

"Just the first page.” She intones, caution for the child’s hopes in her voice, she presses her skirt under her knees and sits on the scratchy carpet. The pup curls close to see the pictures. Resting his tiny chubby cheek in the billow of Tae’s big puffy sleeve.

Tae's chest is all tight as she reads. The pup is very well-behaved, he pauses, and asks questions in a soft voice only when Tae gives him space to respond. Tae easily ommits the parts that aren't appropriate. but tae finds herself watching the pup a little bit more as the minutes stretch.

In a few years with your own little ones around, will Tae become the defacto bedtime story reader? Will she do this with the pack's pups one day? Will she be the one to take that bright little light in their eyes that imagines things as greater and more and cultivate it? Her cheeks feel warm at the prospect, heart beating like a hummingbird's wings in excitement.

Your pups and Jin's pups too- they're gonna be so loved. Tae's gonna be the best mom to them, The best alpha too.

One page turns into two and then three. In this quiet corner with only Tae’s voice as ruler and god, the little pup hinges on every word. Until there’s another voice close by. An adult not wishing to be loud, a whispered name.

“Jae?”

Tae smiles up at the woman at the end of the aisle of books. Her smile turns sweeter when Jae hops up and runs to press his face into her jeaned thighs. Tae remembers how that felt, how every scent besides Tae’s own omega mother felt overwhelming and icky.

Tae stands with a crack of her knees and makes to hand over the book, “This makes a great bedtime story until about chapter 8, that one you might want to skip until he’s a little older.”

The woman makes to smile, but it only goes so far. Tae watches in perfect detail, everything in slow motion, as her eyes flicker down to Tae’s Addams apple.

She drags her child close by their wrist quicker than Tae can blink. Tae sees the moment that the child realizes this touch isn’t gentle, wide eyes going fear-stricken as he's tugged behind her back. And then it's all downhill from there.

I'll spare you the more vile bits.

But the saddest moment of the argument that follows (Which involves not one but three of Tae's co-workers to calm down the hysterical woman whose screeches echo around the quiet library) is when the pup tries to get his mother's attention. "Mom, I liked that she was reading to me."

"He" the certified Karen hisses, moving in a way that makes the pup flinch back. "-should know better than to corrupt a pup with such- such-" her eyes dart down and up, and Tae's skin burns. "Disgusting behavior."

The misgendering doesn't even sting. What does hurt is the eyes peering in. She isn't being quiet and it's causing many of the library's patrons' attention is diverted. Tae's coworkers have put themselves between Tae and the woman. But there still aren't enough people (enough packmates) in between her and the verbal tirade.

An hour later, after the woman has left after threatening to call the police, Tae talks with his boss and his boss’s boss. The room behind the front desk is glass, and he knows that the door doesn’t keep the sound of their raised voice out.

“I wasn’t harassing her child; I was just helping him find a book for Christ sake!”

The worst part is that this isn’t the first time that this has happened. No- since Tae came out there have been two other complaints leveled against her from bigoted patrons. Both right at the beginning before she got the hang of presenting how she wanted to.

At least those confrontations weren’t face-to-face. At least those complaints didn’t end with someone threatening to call the police and a pup cowering, tugged along too roughly out the door.

The little pup had glanced back at Tae, mouth in pout, eyes swimming with tears.

Even if the woman felt righteous in her anger, the least she could have done was not yell in front of the pup. Tae promises herself right then and there, that she'll never raise her voice in front of the pack's pups, not in anger.

The book has stayed on the counter at the front. Pink and gold and treacherous. Tae hopes that if anything, the pup finds it and reads the ending one day. Stories have a way of finding us, even when the world makes us let them go.

Now in the back room behind the check-out counter. Tae’s boss levels her with an expectant look, the kind that people give when they don’t want to be transphobic not really- it’s just so hard for them not to, so learned. Tae is the nail that sticks up. It’s bullshit really. Tae can tell it's bullshit before she opens her mouth.

“Really? He asked for Cinderella?”

“Yes.” Tae’s biting tone is an alpha’s tone, not a man’s, and yet she knows how it sounds.

“I find that hard to believe.”

“I’m not lying.” Is Tae supposed to only help some children find the books they want? Is she supposed to look at them and make her best guess if they’ve got homophobic parents and skip them over? It’s not her fault that the sweet sweet pup’s parent was a bigot.

“I can’t help but feel like- you’ve got a personal agenda-“

"Charlie-" the district manager cautions.

Tae can’t stop herself from snapping, alpha anger sparking with the intent to burn. “Little boys should be allowed to read Cinderella if they want to” Rats and all. Her hands are shaking, and it isn’t missed by them. The room smells thick with Tae’s spicy cinnamon anger.

The district manager sets her hand on Tae's shoulder, and her anger ebbs just a little. “I think maybe you should go home a little early today, just to cool off. We can talk about it more tomorrow.”

Tae doesn’t want to go home early, Tae doesn’t want to go home at all as she packs up her books. Her bag lighter than usual, absent of the stories that she wants to take home. For once there aren’t any that she wants to read.

She walks to the train station because Jimin won’t be off work for another 2 hours and that’s when he’d usually pick her up, the last three days he’s gotten her flowers too; white roses the first day, pink the second, and red the third. She sends him a text.

Tae <3 (1:48): I left work early today, you don’t have to pick me up, I’ll get an Uber home.

Mini-alpha (1:49):!!!!!

Mini-alpha (1:49): What happened? Are you sure you don’t want me to pick you up? I can leave now.

Tae sighs, looking down at her phone while she waits for the crosswalk light to come on. Red still, green in a few seconds, she only has to wait. She can practically feel Jimin's nervous energy through the phone. it's a wonder he doesn't immediately call her.

It makes her soft. It isn't in Jimin's nature to give any of his lovers any space but he always makes an effort when it comes to her.

Tae <3 (1:53): No. It’s fine. I’ll talk to you when you get home.

Tae doesn’t want to talk to Jimin about transphobia again. At least not yet. It’s too much energy. It’s not that Tae doesn’t want to make what happened during Namjoon’s rut better. It’s not that she doesn’t want to talk about it- it’s just that there’s nothing to talk about, the explanation of his actions are such a burden for Tae to bear. And Tae trusts that Jimin’s heart is in the right place even if he makes mistakes. And even telling Jimin off, yelling at him, wouldn’t change it.

Either one day Tae will not have to deal with bigoted parents, either one day she’ll pass and won’t have to worry, or she'll always be in this awkward middle ground.

Trans people are like toupees, you only notice them when there’s something off, something a little misplaced about them. Tae fears that most of all. Femininity, as much as she wants it, as much as it's hers to take, what if it won't ever fit right? What if she never passes?

Tae loves her job at the library, it’s the perfect mix of boring and safe and easy even if it doesn’t pay enough. But even as she's gained things like skirts and puffy sleeves, she's exchanged them for days like today. Really, the library was her favorite place before today and now, every step away from it makes her feel a little lighter. She's not even angry anymore, just exhausted mentally.

Tae decides to walk home at least she’s in her most conservative channel flats, they could use a little bit more wear and love and Tae’s thoughts are still too sharp. She dulls them to a palatable edge that all falls apart when she gets home.

You’re there, thank fucking god you’re always there when she gets home. You’ll always be Tae’s comfort person.

Tae opens the door with a creek and push of cold air, you're saying something to Yoongi turning with a toss of your hair, eyes brightening when you see her before you've even said her name.

You look a little healthier today, with a little bit more of a rosy glow to your cheeks and a healthy brightness to your eyes, not all glassy.

"Tae! You're home early!"

Tae will never stop being proud of how hard you try, and will never stop being a bit envious either because Tae-

Tae looks at you and wilts, bag flopping onto the floor, and predictably burst into tears.

"Oh- oh Tae."

"Baby girl-"

You and Yoongi are just about the best security blanket a packmate could ask for. You're so good as you pull her down to your level so you can kiss away her tears, maneuvering her like a perfect team onto the couch. Yoongi's strong hands slide off her shoes. Yoongi's fingers digging into her sore heel as you kiss away her every tear.

A substantial amount of babying and a Sos packmate in distress text later, and Tae is reclining across a freshly fluffed nest, the muscles in her body relaxed. The blisters on the back of her feet are bandaged and kissed. Every inch of her body is too.

You don't talk about it until after the pack's facemasks are finished, and hobi's clear coat has dried over the tiny nail sticker that you left. a small bumblebee.

Your skin smells sweet after a long long bath full of fancy bath bombs. Jinnie had also rubbed oil onto her freshly shaven legs. You helped, dragging it along oh so carefully to not nick her skin. Ending each pass with a kiss to her ankle and then upper thigh.

Tae’s head is in your lap now, cheek pressed against your (slightly chubbier) thighs. Her sniffles the background music as Tae gives her final recap of what happened.

Your nose gets a wrinkle in it when you go cross. "There's so much meanness to the world, I hate how people have to add to it."

Jimin’s anger leaves an undercurrent in the air, dragging the other alphas along, Hobi’s hands are strong where they dig into Tae’s shoulders, belly down in the nest while you play with her hair, braiding it back and forth. The attention makes her feel a little tingly.

“Do you know what her name was? Did you get a look at her car-“ Jimin asks, nearly barking. The library has cameras. Jimin knows it does.

Jin sets a hand on the back of his neck, a scruff threatening. “Down pup. Tae doesn’t need you to track them down.” Jimin’s teeth look particularly sharp in the light. For a face so soft he has quite the mouth on him.

“They made her sad,” he growls, but it's softer, more pointed as he crouches over her.

Namjoon’s quiet voice unlocks the whole world's worries, massaging gently down the column of Tae’s delicate neck, rough hands, worn tender touching her regardless. Namjoon is rarely ever so pointed, but it's logical, from an alpha's perspective, Tae knows what he hints.

"I think that if your bosses aren't going to protect you from people like that, then I want you to leave your job." Jin gives him a look like, 'Now you know where I'm coming from' but Tae's the important packmate right now.

Tae rolls Namjoon's words around her tongue, her hand loosely twined with his. Namjoon has the steadiest hands out of everyone in the pack and a few minutes ago he repurposed his surgery skills to do her nails. Took off the chipped red and re-did them because Namjoon knows she feels best when her claws are polished. He checks them now. Tapping them lightly to not smudge them.

It's a girl's night, the first girl's night you've ever had with the whole pack. Tae's face is still glossy from the face mask.

“I don’t think I want to quit; I don’t think that would help at all that’s not going to like- solve the world and all its issues.”

“No, but- if it’s making you more sad than happy. Then maybe it’s worth considering.”

Tae knows Namjoon’s not saying that she doesn’t make enough to affect the pack's finances, but that's still the truth. Hobi pulls himself along her other side and you watch him with heavy-lidded eyes.

Hobi presses a kiss to Tae's temple, “All you want to do is write every day anyways, and we just want you to be happy,” 6 heads nod their agreement.

Hobi isn't wrong; The last four weekends in a row Tae has woken up several hours earlier than the pack would usually stir from morning cuddles, just to get a few hours of uninterrupted writing done. She’s also spent nearly every night in her library room, staying up late after the pack has retired upstairs until one of you comes down and wrangles her upstairs. The pack's prettiest alpha needs her beauty sleep.

But is it enough to count on? Is it worth quitting her job over?

You duck down low, kissing the same spot Hobi did, your lips touching just a Tae away. a heavy breath wooshes out of her chest. "Yeah why wouldn't we want you to quit? If you're always here then I can always do this."

Your kiss is gentle, and it tastes like belonging more than Tae would ever be able to write, to describe. A love that makes you feel like you belong is a rare thing. And Tae's hand goes up to tangle in your hair, keeping you there for just a shared breath longer.

The next breath tastes a bit like freedom. It's scary to be free.

(But Tae leaves her 2 weeks' notice on her boss’s desk before the end of the next work day, and she doesn't feel bad about it one bit).

~-~

(1 year prior)

Maybe the truth is that the reason why you don’t feel you deserve agency is because you know what your agency looks like. The choices you’re willing to make when it comes down to it.

The secrets you tell and the lies you have buried deep in your pocket like one of Hobi’s found things. Something you can’t get rid of and cast back into the ocean. No matter how hard you try. There is something about murder that sticks, that stays no matter how many times you try to wash your hands of it.

It's not guilt, because you don't feel guilty for what you had to do.

Being backed into a corner can make someone do a whole hell of alot of monstrous things. And back then Life was monotonous. Back then there was Anguish without change.

Your life went like this: Go home. Get beaten. Get hurt. Get Raped. Wake up. Meet up with Hyejin. Make poison. Make pastries. Go to the Don’s house. Feed it to them. Listen to Moonbyul tell you to wait. Go home. Get beaten again and again. Get raped every night. On and on and on.

Clean up your blood from the tiles. Clean it from the carpet. Hydrogen peroxide and not bleach. Cover the bruises up with color corrector first before you put concealer over them.

Smile and tell everyone that your husband and you are perfectly happy. There will be a pup on the way soon enough, I'm so lucky to have someone who supports me, and I'm so lucky to have a love like this.

Go home. Get beaten. Get hurt. Get Raped. Go to sleep and don't cry because then he'll beat you for keeping him awake.

In the darkness that curls around you. Blood going tacky between your legs, you start to dream of wicked sweet things.

What you've been through would be enough to make anyone go crazy, Enough to make anyone consider drastic action. Enough to make anyone consider murder.

Enough for you to slide a pair of small syringes off of Moonbyul’s night desk and a small packet of arsenic too. You know how to make a simple syrup. You know how to mix in arsenic to it, how to make it liquid soluble without breathing it in.

You make it in the fine china and break it after so that you can throw it out without worrying. You get a beating for it but you hardly feel it when Geumjae drags you across the floor by your hair. It hardly breaks your heart when he steps on your ribcage with the intent to break bones because you know what you have to do.

After, with your own blood on your teeth, you make sure to leave it in the bottom of the trash, and ask the cleaning staff not to take it out yet. They're supposed to find it.

You don't care if you die, you just want to make sure the necessary villains are punished. When it comes to blame the person who is most to blame is you anyway. You are simply numb to pain, numb to your own anguish. Numb to the idea of your own death too. Geumjae's already killed you in every way that matters.

Cut off a wolf's head and it still has the power to bite; give a girl an enemy and she'll do dangerous things.

Your meetings with the Don and beta always go the same; gossip, and greetings. Sometimes when you come bearing bruises, they tell you to wait just a little longer.

Go home. Get beaten. Get hurt. Get Raped. Wake up. Just give it time for his temper to settle. Once you're mated it will get better.

Even Moonbyul and Hyejin tell you that planning the perfect crime takes time. That you'll be saved if you only wait. Help is coming.

Bullshit.

You’re tired of waiting for him to kill you, you're tired of waiting to die. You're smarter than all of them because you know exactly how to get everything you want and you're willing to do anything to get it.

The next time Moonbyul and Hyejin take you to the Don and Beta’s house under the guise of afternoon tea, you are prepared for war and dressed with revenge in mind. Your white dress knotted at the shoulders falling in a heavenly sheet, like an avenging angel, neither pious nor sinful.

You are a force of nature and nature does not ask when it takes lives.

What’s worse; the people that enable the abusers or the abusers themselves? Who is more to blame for the pain caused?

You are no longer hiding and you won't let them hide this time. The bruise on your cheek is purple and mottled, the rings of bruises on your wrists from his hands while he held you down.

When you smiled at Geumjae over breakfast this morning, there was only one thought in your mind.

You’re next.

Your agency looks like this; elegantly done hair your skirt a little short for fall. A basket of arsenic-backed goods in a basket as is usual. Fluffy pink cupcakes with the perfect Swiss meringue buttercream in little spirals.

A gentle smile at the beta when she opens her doors for you, letting the monster in, because you’ve been over enough times that she trusts you. You suppose that's your doing too, you've fooled her into thinking you're just another idiot girl who decided to marry rich and didn't bother to consider the strings attached. A wolf in sheep’s clothing, you bare your teeth when you smile.

Hyejin has helped on that front; over the past few months, she has taught you exactly the kind of conversation that the beta likes- the useless conversations about family drama, the small little bits that you let through about your husband’s opinion on which pup is marrying whom, which alpha is good or bad for the packs near dozen omega pups that aren’t mated yet. Which alphas are likely to be a liability? This kind of gossip is all information and strategy.

You might have lied in your call to her and told her you were fearful of one of the younger ones- and a conversation you’d happened to witness on a street corner, a shadowy figure that looked a little too severe not to be the authorities. Of course, these kinds of things have to be handled with discretion and ginseng tea.

The Don does not bother to turn down the TV when you walk in, sitting vulnerable in his recliner with his feet up. It doesn’t appear that he has any sort of inclination or plans to interact with you when you sit here at his kitchen table and talk. Instead, he lounges and watches his sports, loud because his hearing is so bad, nearly deafening.

It’s good. hopefully anyone nearby will not overhear.

You hope that if this goes south before you have a chance to confess that they find the letter you wrote at home; the one that says your husband is the one that put you up to this.

You know that the pack’s retribution will be swift, that any sort of alibi he has will be null and void with the evidence you’ve been leaving. A little trail of breadcrumbs that leads right into a pretty little grave for your husband. Even if you won't be around to see it.

You're already a friend of pain. You already find comfort in it. If they kill you (which they will) then at least it will finally be over.

You wait until the moment you know is coming, when the Don looks over his shoulder at you and comands “Be a dear and bring me one.”

You put one of your artfully created confections on a pretty gold-rimed plate and walk to his side, you lean over to put it in his lap as he indicates. the same way he does every time you come over with sweets.

The lingering hand on your ass is hardly abnormal. behind you the beta's tea cup clinks as she sets her tea down and says nothing. even though you know she notices.

He’s so busy coping a feel he doesn’t notice your other hand, going to the syringe duck taped to your thigh.

It happens quicker than the Don can blink. The most powerful man in the underworld can't be bothered to protect his life for a pretty little piece of ass. You smile down at him, and his hand squeezes the round apple of your behind.

His hand is still on your ass when you whip your arm around with as much force as you can and drive the syringe and plunger into his neck.

You must have hit something in his neck because he barely has a second to splutter before he’s going still and quiet. Mouth falling horrifyingly slack. His breath rattles and his eyes dart as his whole body is paralyzed near instantly, in the time it takes for his blood to circulate.

Two paces, swing, plunge.

The beta barely has a second to scream or stand to attack you. You are so much younger than they are. Your body might be fragile and frail but It’s still stronger than hers. Her brief scream is easily drowned out by the scratch of the TV.

She ends up on the floor, the icing on the cupcakes sticky as she falls into half of them, tossed onto the floor by your brief tussle as you straddle her struggling form. Her pushing gets weaker and weaker and she sobs.

It doesn’t surprise you when you see the black tracery of a dying mating mark itching up her skin.

One thing that the family had always been oh so careful of was to talk only in their mother tongue around you. Secrets are best kept when they’re spoken in foreign tongues. It was a way to isolate you. To make them speak English for you to understand felt like a beholden request. At one point It was a point of insecurity for you, always left out of the loop, always relying on your husband to keep you in the know.

You bend over her as her pushing gets weaker and weaker, the arsenic doing its job, causing numbness and the tingling of extremities before it causes paralysis and then coma and death. Your hair falls in a sheet over the beta’s face.

You’ve studied much over the last few months. Enough that you lean in close over her and speak your words in perfect Korean.

“You look so angry,” you croon softly, dragging a finger down her cheek. Spittle froths at her mouth as she breathes heavily. “You shouldn’t- if you want someone to blame you only need to look in the mirror.”

You lean in close until your lips brush her ear, “it's your fault you see- you're the one who lied" you mimic her voice, making it scratchy, "'just wait a little longer, it will be better for the family if you stay quiet." you laugh, "as if that where true, the only person it benefits is you. You where ready to let him hurt me and kill me if i just stayed quiet."

You wipe away a bit of spit from her lower lip, "You always told me how it was your duty to protect the family- but you only serve yourself. If you'd have done something, if you'd have helped me I wouldn't have had to do this. You just wanted me to shut up and die quietly.”

You switch back to English, “Well now it’s your turn.”

You watch her tongue go numb, paralyzed, but the poison hasn’t advanced far enough for her not to speak.

“Fucking- worthless bitch.”

You laugh and stand brushing some crumbs from your skirt. She’s already too weak to move, to shout, or fight you. You watch the light start to leave her eyes, winking out so slowly, like a dying star. But she still looks so pissed.

“You don’t have a right to be angry, you killed me first. You can’t blame me for fighting back.”

She gives her last breath and the TV plays on. Your shoe ticks her hand, her fingers twitching weakly. You watch as she gasps her last breath, a small smile on your face.

You sit at the table and turn the TV down. You wait a few minutes, but it quickly becomes an hour. You have yourself a nice little treat while you watch, turning the channel to a food network while you eat.

You really are a fantastic cook. The crumb on this batch is so nice you don’t even taste the metallic tang of poison. You eat through one, and then another, until the whole basket is empty.

Before you know it there is a concerned knock at the door. The lock clicks and turns when you answer it.

When Moonbyul opens the door, you laugh at the expression on her face. Licking the frosting from your lips. Even that is delicious.

She takes in their bodies, crumpled on the floor the frosting on your cheeks. The evidence. Both of them dying. A violence you cannot undo.

Her voice is somber. “Oh Pup, what have you done?”

~-~

Please Like, Comment, and Reblog <3 every word helps motivate me to write the next chapter!

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Come tell me what you liked about this chapter!

~-~

Notes:

this chapter is a very classic bily chapter, in the fact that there is a fuck ton of fluff and then bang the mafia bits just take you out. we needed to get back into the mafia bits of the story sooner rather than later though 💀

i felt like i was going a little too over the top with certain bits of puptalk in this chapter, but i really wanted to use it to show that like yeah- the pack has been treating her alot more gently since her breakdown, they've been babbying the fuck out of her, even if we don't get to see it :(

Hobi's texts are so???? Fucking cute?? He's so hopeless my god he wants to make her feel loved without actually saying it and i hope you read them and just go "oh, you're an idiot."

I have this whole elaborate backstory to how wonho's gym works with monthly subscriptions to classes where people can decide how many classes they want to take a week, ie gym dues for facilities and then discounted classes on top if they pay for it before hand, with several tiers.

this chapter almost feels clerical- this is definitely more of a set up chapter- where i needed to check off a lot of boxes, like hobi's courting present- before we go any further into the story. things are going to start amping up in terms of stakes pretty quickly.

That one part, where hobi is kinda malfunctioning after the m/c touches his cheek and everyone teases him feels the most representative of the pack as a whole. like that part where they're all replying- feels very real. i struggle a little to capture a sense of domesticity in concise ways, but i think this part is very tidy.

That little touch with hobi- where he touches her wrist and her finger, that touch has so much weight to it, i personally think the whole pack was tasting the sexual tension on the air, can you guys feel it too or is it all in my head?

idk why yoongi calling tae babygirl makes me so flustered but it does 🥵

i really wanted to work calling tae mommy into the chapter someway but tbh this chapter felt complex enough without it.

there is like- one plot hole in this whole story, and that is in the first chapter of the story when yoongi gets a call the person on the other line says "grandfather is dying." implying that his death wasn't instantaneous like this is shown to be. however, in my mind- the injections don't actually kill the don and beta but plunge them into a coma that they never wake up from- is this an actual possibility with arsenic poisoning- NO IT ISN'T lol, you're just going to have to suspend your disbelief for me.

the m/c has always been the person who killed the don and the beta- i've known this since like...maybe the 4th chapter? it wasn't in the og og plan for the story but almost everything in bily has been hammered out since then. and tbh you already knew she killed them just not that it was this violent! does this count as a secret???? idk! maybe!!!

she's a little murder baby just like minnie <3

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dangermousie · 9 months

Text

How to do character studies in a scene that is ostensibly about nothing much

The weiqi game between FL, cousin and 17 is my favorite scene in these two eps because it so brilliantly illuminates all three characters (and shows why cousin would be such a bad fit for FL while 17 is a good one.)

Basically, Cousin wants to play weiqi with 17, who is apparently known as a weiqi genius. But FL is grumpy because she’s the one who wanted to play against cousin (who is not interested because she’s terrible.)

For cousin, of course he wants to play against the best; it’s insane for him to play against someone who is useless (he can’t hone his skills or learn against a bad player.) It’s sort of a parallel of him only being interested in people in this village if they are useful to him. But 17 has no interest in that. He wants whatever would make FL happy.

The thing is, this does not come across as weak or codependent or pathetic in the least. This is a man who is secure in his priorities - and for him playing a game is immaterial in the grand scheme of things, but making FL happy is important. That does not impinge on his dignity or his will or his masculinity. He just someone who cares about the wellbeing of his loved one and making her happy is way more important than some random game. He has no particular ego interest in showing off how good he is or beating some other dude or w/e, not even in a “if I show off how smart I am, she will dig me” way - because he assumes the utterly sane but so rarely practiced position that you know what would make my loved one happy? They know that better than I do so why don’t I listen to what they say will make them happy. Quite different from cousin who is very much “I know what’s best for you” type.

What sticks out here is twofold - FL’s dedicated attempts to deny she cares (her very denial confirms she does) and the teeth 17 shows to Cousin as compared to his meting look at FL. This is very much a dog thing to me - he may be loyal as hell to his owner but anyone else he can certainly bite!

Heeee, they agree on her playing cousin but 17 advising and I love the positioning with FL and 17 a team against cousin.

This is honestly so brilliant! 17 advises her but when she wants to go a different way, he doesn’t even demur, he is fine with it and easily agrees. The utter indignant shock on cousin’s face is glorious. But that’s the thing, I can’t see cousin ever acting like this even if he knew FL was his long lost XY. (Or if he did, he’d make a show of it - he’d act this way because he wanted to consciously demonstrate his caring - as opposed to 17, where it’s not showing off or demonstration, he’s genuinely not sacrificing anything because the point of this game to him is making FL happy and nothing else.) Even cousin’s question highlights that he does not understand 17 at all - 17 does not “let” FL do anything because “letting” would imply a degree of control or desire for same and 17 never feels that, he just wants to love her and make her happy and if there is any ownership thoughts it’s his wanting to be owned by her not the other way around.

The above is your future life cousin ahahahha (he’s a great, complex character who reminds me a lot of LCY from Goodbye My Princess but I do NOT like him as a person.)

And once again she ignores his advice and he Does. Not. Care. His priorities in this game are so different from cousin’s that they might as well be playing two different games. He knows what move is better (and it’s his) but he is fine with her picking her own move or agreeing with his - what matters is that she gets her choice, whatever that choice is.

Cousin keeps trying to center it back on him and 17 just refuses.

The moves were hers but he is the one who takes the responsibility for losing and I love that so much. The whole calm acceptance of losing, the whole taking responsibility on himself tho he didn’t have to - I just love the man.

And then we get the below little coda:

This man, with his good heart and utter lack of ego is a total keeper.

I’ve said this before, but it bears repeating. I am so impressed by the screenplay, the directing and Deng Wei’s acting because it’s so hard to make unalleviated goodness interesting but 17 is so layered and complex and fascinating and real and yet utterly good at the same time.

#cdrama #deng wei #yang zi #zhang wanyi #lost you forever

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parkerslatte · 5 months

Text

Below The Stars

Christopher Lightwood x Fem!Vampire!Reader

Word Count: 1.7k

Warnings: none

Summary: Christopher has been acting strangely for the past few months and the rest of the Merry Thieves want to find out why.

The Shadowhunter Chronicles Masterlist

•••

The sun was setting and Christopher immediately shot to his feet, surprising his friends around him. The small black book he always carried around with him fell to the floor and the Lightwood made no move to pick it up. Thomas, who was sitting beside Christopher, raised his eyebrows at his cousin.

“Where are you off to?” Thomas questioned as Christopher shrugged on his tattered jacket, stains from his many experiments still visible in the dim light of the room.

“I promised my mother I would help with something,” Christopher so obviously lied. It was rare for the Lightwood boy to lie but he didn’t want anyone to know where he was going. “I shall see you all tomorrow.”

Christopher left the room rather quickly after that, leaving Thomas, James and Matthew in stunned silence.

“He was clearly lying, wasn’t he?” Matthew spoke, eyes glancing down to the notebook that never left Christopher’s side.

“Clearly,” James replied. “He never leaves this lying around.”

Thomas shrugged. “If he didn’t want to tell us, then we should stay out–”

“Thomas, don’t tell me that we should stay out of this,” Matthew cut him off. “You want to know what is going on with him just as much as I do. All three of us have clearly noticed a shift in his behaviour.”

“But we still shouldn’t pry,” Thomas reasoned with the blonde.

“But don’t you want to know how he has been spending his time? He always leaves late in the day and the following morning he looks exhausted.” Matthew suddenly gasped. “What if he is seeing someone?”

James looked at Matthew, a hint of amusement on his face. “You like to jump to conclusions, Math.”

“Think about it,” Matthew began, “he always leaves us with some obvious excuse. Whenever you two bring up your relationships, Christopher has that small smile on his face that indicates that he is clearly thinking about someone!”

“Matthew, we can’t know for certain,” Thomas reasoned.

“Then we find out,” The blonde said, rising to his feet. “Don’t you want to see who has captured the heart of our Kit.”

Thomas looked conflicted before rising to his feet. “This is a bad idea.”

Matthew smiled. “You are still agreeing.”

“Let’s go before I change my mind.”

***

Christopher waited at the usual meeting point. The sun was set and the sky was dark. The stars were barely visible under the thick smog of the London air. He had already planned on a trip to the countryside to view the stars more clearly. There was a slight chill in the air and Christopher shivered, looking around the area. It was empty and void of any life. The only light shone from a flat above him, casting onto the cobblestone street below.

As Christopher shivered once more, two arms wrapped around him from behind and he smiled, immediately recognising the bracelet on the wrist. The person was cold yet Christopher only felt warmth as he gently caressed the soft skin of their hands.

“I missed you,” the person muttered, voice muffled by his jacket.

Christopher spun around to face the woman he had fallen in love with over the past few months. The smile was bright on his face as he wrapped his arms around her, pulling her body flush with his. “I missed you too.”

Y/N smiled and leaned up to press a soft kiss against his lips. Christopher responded by cupping her cheeks and kept her in the position, deepening the kiss. Y/N unwrapped her arms from around his torso to wrap around his neck, pressing her body even closer to his. She savoured his warmth.

It had only been three months since Christopher had met Y/N, and it was completely by chance. One night when he was walking back from James and Cordelia’s house after a dinner, he stumbled across Y/N injured in an alleyway. The burn on her arm was a very clear indicator to what she was. Y/N was only turned a year ago and before that she was simply a maid for a wealthy family but once the family had figured out what she was, they kicked her out of the house with nothing but the clothes on her back. Even though Y/N did heal faster than normal, the burn on her arm still needed to be attended to, so Christopher brought her back to his house and helped her out.

Only after that night would Christopher go out of his way to seek her out and Y/N did just the same thing, they both simply couldn’t stay away from one another. Christopher would show Y/N his experiments. And he even tried coming up with solutions to combine science and shadowhunter technology to create something that would mimic sunlight. However, despite his many conversations with Henry and his many failed experiments, Christopher still hadn’t found a way.

Y/N was the first to pull away from the kiss as she smiled up at Christopher. “Follow me.”

Christopher laced his fingers with hers and let himself be pulled along by Y/N. His heart fluttered every time she looked at him with that adoring look in her eyes that only he would witness. He never expected to fall in love but he enjoyed the feeling.

“It’s just through here,” Y/N said, leading him through a park.

Of course there was no one else here at this time of night, the only movement in the park was the shuffling of the squirrels and possibly other small creatures.

“Ta-da,” Y/N said as she presented a picnic blanket with a basket in the centre.

Christopher felt his heart beat increase as he looked down at the loving gesture. His arms were immediately around Y/N’s waist as he pulled her into a hug.

Y/N giggled. “Do you like it?”

“I love it,” Christopher replied. “Thank you.”

Y/N smiled at him as they both took a seat on the blanket. “There is a bakery that is open a long way into the night so I bought you your favourite food.”

Y/N reached into the basket and pulled out two lemon tarts and handed them over to Christopher. He took them gratefully and offered his thanks to Y/N.

Christopher shuffled on the blanket so he could pull Y/N to his side, wanting physical contact with her as they enjoyed the picnic in the moonlight. Y/N had a small mug of a thick liquid that Christopher already knew was blood. Y/N always tried to hide it whenever she fed in his presence but Christopher didn’t care in the slightest, he wanted her for her and he didn’t want her to hide herself from him.

As she drank, Christopher took note of the slightly saddened expression on her face as she stared down at the liquid in the mug. His arms tightened around her the smallest amount.

“I know that you would probably prefer this in the daylight where you could actually see everything,” Y/N began, her voice small. “But with my condition, this is the best I could do.”

Christopher’s eyebrows furrowed. “I don’t care about that, the only thing I care about is being here with you.”

“But don’t you want someone you can take walks in the sun with, bring to family dinners, have a normal life with,” Y/N said, insecurity lacing her tone.

“Where is this coming from?” Christopher asked.

Y/N shrugged. “I’ve just been thinking over the past few days that you will never be able to have a normal life with me. I can’t have children. I can’t eat or drink anything that isn’t the blood of an animal. I can’t walk in the sun. I am doomed to a lifetime of darkness and I don’t want to force you to join me in it.”

Christopher placed down the tart and took Y/N’s hands in his. “Y/N, I do not care about any of that. You are who I have fallen in love with. You are not forcing me to do anything I don’t wish to do. I want to stay awake all night to spend time with you, I don’t care what anyone says. I love you for you, every single part of you.”

Tears welled in Y/N’s eyes as she flung herself at Christopher, sending them both down onto the blanket. “I love you too.” Christopher pressed a kiss to her forehead, fingers tangling in her hair.

“Sorry for being emotional,” Y/N mumbled. “It’s coming up to a year since I was turned.”

Christopher tightened his grip on her, the only form of comfort he knew she would need in that moment.

“I am just missing the sun a little more today,” Y/N confessed. “Even the stars would be nice to see.”

Christopher’s fingertips brushed across her arm as he spoke. “I have been planning a trip for us to take to the countryside. Out there you will see as many stars as you wish and we can get away, just the two of us. I have a carriage prepared with blackout curtains so we can travel during the day and have the whole night to explore.”

Y/N pressed a kiss to his cheek. “I would love that.”

Christopher smiled as Y/N buried her head in the crook of his neck and closed her eyes. “I was thinking of leaving in a few days' time.”

“We can leave whenever you wish,” Y/N replied, her lips brushing against his neck. “The sooner we leave, the sooner I get to spend every moment with you.”

“Then we will leave tomorrow,” Christopher said. “We can leave just before the sun rises.”

Y/N smiled. “That sounds absolutely perfect.”

“I love you,” Christopher muttered against her forehead.

“I love you too, Christopher,” Y/N replied. “And thank you for everything you have done for me.”

“I will continue for as long as I shall live,” Christopher replied and pressed his lips against hers. This time, neither of them broke away for a while. They simply enjoyed being wrapped in each other's embrace.

***

Thomas, James and Matthew quietly left the park and headed for James’s house, each one shocked by what they had just witnessed.

Matthew stepped ahead of the Herondale and the Lightwood, a smirk toying on his lips. “I told you so.”

#christopher lightwood x fem!reader #christopher lightwood x reader #christopher lightwood #shadowhunters #shadowhunters x reader #the shadowhunter chronicles #the last hours

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rontra · 10 months

Note

holding your hand looking into your eyes is the exact energy I intended thank you for picking up on it

🤝

typeoneninja asked: Maybe though do say who powergirl is because I have actually less than zero idea

oh my god i get to talk about my blorbo...okay well you MUST understand i'm still a comics newbie and laser focus on only the stuff i directly care about so it's not like i've read everything about her or anything (and things do vary--sometimes A LOT depending on the character lol--from comic to comic as is DC's dark design). so take everything here as kinda loosy-goosy from someone who's Casually Acquainted. however (LONG POST)

^me.

you know Supergirl right. heard of her. kara zor-el (spelling may wary) she's superman's cousin (usually) and has the same power set. it's me supergirl and i have all your powers

power girl is Also kara zor-el (spelling may vary) from a Different Dimension. two of them.

the details about her backstory vary a little but the agreed upon IDEA for her is that her home dimension has like collapsed somehow or the earth in it is torn to shreds or whatever. she's either like the only survivor of a dimension that went poof or she's been isekai'd here from an earth that was getting blown up by demons or whatever.

and now there's two karas and theyre forced to coexist on the same earth and they can't both show up dressed like supergirl so now power girl has to do her own thing.

that's like generally the gist of whats going on w her conceptually. she got vooped over here and now she's stranded on an earth that isn't hers with castmates that aren't the same people she knew

like i said the specifics of her backstory vary but on top of being Dimension Displaced she usually shares Supergirl's whole "after their home planet exploded she arrived to earth much later than Superman did, due to Space Shenanigans" thing. she's usually older than supergirl. and she DOES have bigger boobs also. NOT sure why that's a dimensional difference between them but i'll take it (what were they feeding her on earth 2?)

sometimes they're drawn basically looking identical. i can understand the impulse (they are both kara zor-el after all.) but i think it's kind of a shame when power girl doesn't look Older than her because i like it when she's older than her. i guess sometimes they either ditch that part or just don't feel like it. F.

anyway when they look identical you can usually tell them apart by identifying which one DC has bequeathed the Boob Window upon and that one will be power girl. works every time

to me i became enamored with her when i was reading some green lantern comic (it was my first comic, they had launched a guy's coffin into the sun and had to go get it back it was wack) and i noticed a boob window girl (my beloved) had BEEN INVITED but didnt get to DO anything. she spent all her time standing in crowd shots while other people did the main stuff. and i thought "wow. now there's a character i need to put in my purse". and the rest is history

it was like this

i felt like bad for her i was like oh honey...you're coming with me... my girl in the ensemble

she kind of struggles in general because she doesn't get a lot of content coming her way. (and when she does it's not usually stuff that i love.) she shares this with supergirl too 🥰

anyway i hope that helps a little. she's supergirl from a different dimension and she's stuck here now. is the gist of it.

for a bonus side-elaboration on what IM doing over here in my AU, my main basis for CTDE power girl is her shenanigans in the n52 where she gets stuck here WITH another extremely normal girl (they get isekai'd together during like a big dumb demon war on their home earth). that's helena wayne she's batman's daughter in the other dimension and no such person exists on this earth. they're both stuck (together) (the only 2 people on earth who know and understand each other) (it's romance) (superbat for girls)

in that story power girl becomes like mildly obsessed for a bit with devising a way to get HOME to her own dimension and earth which is (as far as she knows) still under siege by Planet Fucking Hellmouth. shes building machines. shes using technology

(while helena believes there's nothing to go home to anymore and they should try to make a new life in this new dimension)

what gets me about it is that its SO FUNNY that this specific power girl's setup is basically a supervillain origin story that they just don't lean into because her name is on the book (obviously). (hey why do so many villains build a DimensionFucking Machine that's gonna Fuck Up the Dimensions because theyre obsessed with something on the other side anyway)

but i feel no such restraint obviously!!!!

so anyway my CTDE "Arc 1" is about Power Girl (now almost two decades deep in her desperate fixation) finishing building the ultimate DimensionFucker 9000 to get home. shes been working on this for years. she doesn't care very much about this earth and she needs to go back to her own one NOW

Helena is realizing with horror she's way too late to talk her babygirl out of this one because PG just isn't listening to her anymore (and as a human she would struggle to snap PG out of it by force). she feels she has no other recourse but to betray her most specialest girl and sell her out to supergirl, who's investigating the Weird Dimension Rift Shit that's been going on (and is strong enough to actually fight her)

And Supergirl has to stop PG because what that thing is doing to HER universe is NOT GOOD!!!!!

(Supergirl was like a teenager when her home planet krypton went kaboom--she Remembers it and feels detached from everything because she doesn't Have a home anymore + oh my god the trauma + also no one on earth even really needs her that much. but that doesn't mean PG can DESTROY THE DIMENSION!!!!)

(also in my AU the other earth is actually lost for good, so it's not only a Grief Quest but a FUTILE Grief Quest because there's no one alive and nothing to salvage on the other side of the portal anyway)

It's the "Power Girl As Villain In A Supergirl Book" arc. because i think women should have cute obsessions that endanger other people and i LOVE when the karas interact

this is why i drew pictures of them being very not nice to each other 😔

like it all works out. it's fine. they do some crying and screaming at each other, some kicking and punching, helena gets her piece in, and PG's brain fungus finally calms down enough for her to take the "Protagonist Kara" seat for Arc 2 (when Supergirl has her own issues to deal with)

theres just a lot of "kara zor el screaming At Herself that she can't go home because there is no such place anymore and she has to live with that forever in a place she doesn't belong". you know. girl talk

anyway that's like roughly power girl + what im doing with her in my first arc (helena is here too dont worry) hope that helps. shes my comic blorbo. hope she gets the main stage in a good comic someday. MDGHBJFGM

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cult-of-the-placeholder · 6 months

Text

Uhhhh so. I can't draw, so please don't throw rocks at me 😅 is anyone gonna see this? DUNNO. But I'm throwing it into the void anyway

Behold: 4 cute babies for me to traumatize with my War on the Lamb AU

This AU wouldn't exist without @heketsbroodau and their amazing fics. Go read them! Literally right now! All of them! Every single one!!!!!!!

The general idea this WotL AU works with goes as follows:

- The demigod children of the bishops (cousins), quailing and listless in the wake of their parents' slaughter, decide to counter attack and wage war on the lamb for ruining their lives and killing the family they loved so dearly

- In each brood, one was voted amongst the siblings to take up the Crowns to use their power to lead the vengeance quest (because the crowns are at least partially sentient, I imagine that they vanished when their bearers died to keep themselves from being ceased)

- The children have mostly been raising themselves since the lamb destroyed... literally everything

- They're planning to essentially use one of themselves as a sacrifice: taking up the Red Crown and agreeing to be locked away in eternal banishment to prevent it from ever causing trouble and strife again

Though their ages when each Bishop died varies, they are in order: Adami, Ylindri, Phereo, and finally No Name. When Shamura dies, their ages go as follows: 19 (Adami), 14 (Ylindri), 12 (Phereo), No Name (9). When the story kicks off they'll all likely be in their 20s but I haven't decided fully yet.

Adami:

As the oldest amongst the cousins, she feels it is the duty of her and her siblings to look after the younger ones. She loves them all very much, every, single, one. She and her dad were really close, and though she didn't have his aptitude for magic she was a born scientist at heart. She was always tucked away in the temple labs, fussing with bacteria cultures and scribbling in her notebooks. Thoroughly enjoyed Kallamar's genetics hobby, and still has the the very first genome they ever wrote together memorized

When he died, she and her siblings all felt it. They heard the commotion and tried so, so hard to get to him, but Kallamar had cast a magic ward on the temple's inner sanctum, preventing his children from entering or even coming near, not trusting that Narinder's appetite for destruction wouldn't extend to his little ones. He was right, and only after he'd been dead for several hours did the barrier fade

Adami wrote her own speech for his funeral but was crying too hard to deliver it, so it fell to her older sibling to speak on her behalf. She was very much a daddy's girl, and prays at his shrine almost every day, wishing for a peaceful afterlife for him, begging her uncle to be kind (though she knows he won't be)

She splits the Blue Crown with one of her siblings: she's the best scientific mind they've got and is therefore excellent for inflicting biowarfare, but she's got -3 magical ability and so whenever there's need for mass healing or protective magic, it goes to her sibling

Would've probably become a very sweet, bubbly person if not for losing Kallamar. She's a lot more reserved these days, but is still generally pretty peppy when excited about something

Ylindri:

As mentioned above she's the most unbalanced of Shamura's children: meaning, while their domain is wisdom and war, she skewed heavily toward the first one. The majority of the spiderlings (eleven of them in total) are right in the middle, wielding their brains and brawn as one. There's only one other severe skew like Ylindri: her older sister, who's very skewed toward war

A scholar first and foremost, she spent countless days studying medicine and old divine texts trying to find a way to help her Lifegiver's brain damage. She regularly helped change their bandages

Worried they might forget them all, Ylindri wove her Lifegiver a special band of spider silk, which each of their names and a prayer for health delicately woven in. Her hope was that their love would stay with Shamura easier, and might help them feel better. Shamura wears it on their 4th wrist

In public Ylindri calls Shamura her Lifegiver, in private they are Ama

Very softspoken, and thoroughly heartbroken by Shamura's death. Tried to stop them from going to meet the lamb in the sanctum, but their mind had slipped again and Shamura didn't truly recognize her in that moment

Phereo:

Leshy's thirdborn child and second daughter. Is the only girl to have wings but has sworn off flying after Leshy's death

They were really close, and Leshy actually died while the children were in their first chrysallis (they're demigodlings. They undergo multiple metamorphoses in their lives), so when she emerged she and her siblings were greeted by the sorrowful Witness and the earth-shattering news that they had been orphaned

They preserved Leshy's remains so that his childreb could attend the funeral, but Phereo didn't go. She couldn't bear the thought. She was so terrified to make her chrysallis because everyone knows that girls don't have wings, and the only thing that got her to start spinning was her father's promise to be ready to recieve her when she'd emerged, and the whispered secret of, "You're just as I was. You'll be fine." After that, she doesn't want to appear in public, doesn't want anyone to see her, and spends all her time locked in her room mourning the loss of Leshy

She's got hardcore depression in wake of her dad's death. Everything is unstable and scary and she feels so lost and out of sorts. Years pass and her mental health stabilizes but doesn't improve: when the cousins start planning their war and how to defeat the Red Crown for good, she offers her body to the cause. She'll hsve to be banished and locked away, for all eternity. If it will avenge Leshy's death and let her go to a place where she can forget that she exists, then she's happy to do it

Someone get this worm therapy smh

No Name:

Someone seriously help me name him I've gone through like 5 names and none feel right 😭

The smallest, height wise and age wise. He hates it

This froggy is a MAMA'S BOY. He was very, very close with Heket, and loved her more than life itself. She was his mother, after all--there was no one in the world he loved more. The whole gaggle of froglets found Heket's still cooling corpse in the Temple sanctum, and just. Basically did Simba and mufasa. Just kinda snuggled against her and begged her to get up, to heal, to be ok

I don't have a whooole lot of development for him but he's generally pretty quiet and brooding. Very angy. Late teenage angst when thebwar starts but also his mom was murdered by the guy they're waging war on so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Regardless. He's not having a good time. Eats his feelings a lot and is quietly hoping the war kills him

Was voted among his siblings to bear the Yellow Crown and he despises it. It feels so wrong, like the desecration of his mother's memory, to have him stand in her place and wear that which rightfully belongs to her and no one else. Prays to the crown every morning before he puts it on, asking his mother's forgiveness and hoping to serve her memory well

#cult of the lamb #war on the lamb au #gonna make an effort to post some of the development here. i hsve Ideas™#sorry if this kinda sucks lmao im really high

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jimblejamblewritings · 2 years

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let us help you | part 4.

Summary: The team is absolutely in love with one of the SHIELD recruits and hopes she joins the team considering she already lives with them. No one knows that she has several eating problems not even the two super-soldiers who seem to hang onto her even more than the rest of the team

Warnings for the Series: self-esteem issues, eating disorder, angsty, smut

Pairing: Stucky x black!reader

Word Count: 6.2k

Previous Part | (Series Masterlist)

Morgan’s apartment was nice. She lived alone in a one-bedroom, not too cramped. Her personal style of sophistication was clear to see as not a thing seemed out of place and looked like it had purpose occupying the space. Training ended up having a practice mission over the weekend so it wasn’t until the next week you guys could have wine night, but Morgan was determined to have you all over.

You had given in and accepted the wine— wine being the only alcohol you would consume in your moments of clarity. Beer and others still felt like they would give you a beer belly overnight. Morgan was very liberal with what she considered a small glass. It was clear her intentions were to get everyone drunk, not that you minded since it was just the four of you. If any other recruits were there you wouldn’t dare risk loose lips or doing something embarrassing but these guys weren’t just potential teammates but, dare you say, actual work friends.

“Are they really different from training when they’re all relaxed at home?” Clark asked you.

They were intrigued with yours and the Avengers’ domestic life. While you weren’t going to invade the others’ privacy too much, like saying Nat owned several pink items of clothing or Tony and Bruce had matching Science Bros boxers, you did share funny moments and innocent stories. You almost choked on your wine at Courtney’s next question.

“Who’s the better kisser, (Y/N)? Cap or Sarge?”

“W-what makes you think I would know?” You stuttered through the question.

“Wait, you’ve kissed them?” Clark asked, this information being new to him and Morgan.

“She’s dating them,” Courtney said like it was fact and you wanted to know how the hell she knew anything.

“I’m not da—”

“My cousin’s Madeline Washington, told me you were beaming about it at the reunion. She just had to ask if it was true, not that she didn’t believe you but you know. And she knew I was with S.H.I.E.L.D.”

You sat back, knowing there was no getting around it now. You didn’t think about any of your classmates being related to other recruits. At least it was Courtney who found out, you were sure you would’ve died if it was Ryan or Lisa. She put a hand on your knee.

“Don’t worry, stays between us. No way we’re giving those dicks more ammunition.”

Morgan and Clark agreed with her and then leaned forward expectantly, wanting you to answer Courtney’s original question.

“It’s too different to compare. Buck’s a little more demanding, leaves me breathless every time. Stevie’s gentle usually. But he does this thing where he pulls my bottom lip between his teeth and I don’t know where he learned that but woo, chile,” you giggled, alcohol already going to your head.

The night continued with the alcohol, lots of gossiping about significant others, and mock fighting as you tried not to be too loud and disturb Morgan’s neighbors when you pinned each other to the floor. You were thankful it was supposed to be a sophisticated wine night— even if it didn’t end up that way— because Morgan only had charcuterie boards for food and you felt fine eating the bits of meat, fruit, and crackers.

Your phone started ringing and Clark was the one who brought it to you guys’ attention because he was practically screaming as he held it up. Bucky’s name and picture was up on your screen.

“Answer it on speaker!” He threw the phone to you. You shook your head but did as he said, the others trying to be quiet as you did.

“Angel?”

Courtney pretended to faint at the pet name.

“Yes?”

“You want to elaborate on that video you just sent us?”

You had already forgotten about Morgan saying you all should send sexy videos to your partners. In a tipsy haze, naturally, you all agreed and helped each other make them. You were in charge of Clark’s, making him look as buff and attractive as possible with the perfect lower angle as he danced to Courtney’s playlist of songs to start the mood. Courtney had way too much fun with a can of whipped cream per Morgan’s suggestion. Morgan was suddenly an expert at dancing on a table top, you guys almost ruined her video when the camera was almost dropped as she started stripping and you saw her in a lace number that was so different from the plain sports bra and boy shorts during training.

Courtney, who was in charge of your video, was over the moon that you were wearing fancy underwear as well as she suggested— demanded— you strip and pose on Morgan’s armchair. You suggestively ate a popsicle and sent it off to Steve and Bucky without much more thought, putting your clothes on and going back to talking.

“What video?” you asked in the most innocent voice.

“Oh you’ve got jokes now? She thinks this is funny, Stevie.”

You and your friends’ eyes went wide, not expecting Steve to be there too. Morgan had to grab a pillow to keep herself from running around the room. The line seemed to go dead and you were about to say something when Bucky’s voice came back sounding two tones darker than normal.

“Remember last week, angel?”

You bit your lip at the thought of your first time with both of them just last week. Muting the phone, you quickly confirmed what your friends were thinking.

“What about it?” There was an air of defiance with your tone.

“Thought we said you were such a good girl for us. That video’s far from being a good girl and while we’re on a mission.”

Courtney hit you in the arm and muted the call.

“Call him, Sarge. See what it does. Do it, do it.”

Everyone needed a second to squeal it out before you unmuted the phone.

“And what are you going to do about it, Sarge?”

You guys were giddy with the sharp intake of breath that came from Bucky. This time it was Steve that answered.

“What do we normally do when you guys act up, (Y/N)?” Steve was using his captain’s voice. “I expect an answer, recruit?”

“Punishment,” you answered.

“What do you think it should be for that little stunt?”

The others were encouraging you to do the same thing you did to Bucky to Steve. It was sort of a rush having your friends there as they all pooled ideas to try and work up your boyfriends as much as possible. You had to admit you were also curious about where and how far exactly the two of them would go.

“Whatever you think I deserve, Captain,” you whispered into the phone.

He had the same sharp intake of breath that Bucky did. You would’ve been satisfied by both of their reactions alone, thinking they might not keep going. You guys heard on the phone as Steve talked to Bucky, purposely loud enough that you could hear but also acting as if you weren’t even there.

Morgan poured everyone another glass, technically only the second but again her liberal glasses made it hard to judge how much it actually was. Courtney and Clark were pretending to fan themselves as they heard Steve and Bucky talking about what they might do— hearing their mentors talk like this was such a foreign sound. Your friends’ attention turned from the phone and to you with Bucky’s next words.

“Weren’t you struggling so hard to take us, angel? What do I remember you saying, felt like you were being split in half?”

Morgan looked away, tipping her glass to her face, feeling like she was going to blush hearing words not directed towards her.

“How do you think a punishment will feel? You really want that?”

There was a softness in his voice. He and Steve were giving you an out from the more rough side of their sex life. Secretly they hoped this wasn’t just for show and you wanted it like them, or were at least willing to try it.

“I can handle it,” you assured them and even though you couldn’t see it, they both had dark smiles on their face.

“What happened to the formality and respect?”

“I can handle it, Sarge.”

“Oh don’t get shy now. You started it with that video and those pictures. Can you give us a word, (Y/N)? Sarge needs a word before we hang up the phone with you.”

You couldn’t believe you were doing this in the presence of your friends but they just kept grinning and encouraging the debauchery right in front of them. You looked at them for help in coming up with something. Morgan, who did this with her partner, informed you it should be something you are never likely to say during sex but also memorable so you don’t forget.

“Angel?” Bucky asked after the long bout of silence.

“I’m thinking, Sarge. Gemstones.”

“You really love your eyes, don’t you, doll.”

“Hard not to when Captain says they’re an abyss, you two always gettin’ lost in ‘em.”

“You’re getting a little bratty, angel. Watch yourself. Gemstones, that’s our word.”

“When we get back from our mission, be prepared, angel. Couldn’t walk the next day, how long you think it’ll take you this time to stop walking funny. Our pretty doll’s gonna be a little broken doll.” Steve dropped his voice even more.

You gasped and shoved your face into a pillow while the others’ jaws dropped in silence. Steve and Bucky chuckled.

“You liked that, didn’t you?” Bucky asked.

You nodded and then realized they couldn’t see you. “Yes, Sarge. Yes, Captain.”

“There’s a good girl,” Steve’s voice returned to normal. “We’ve got to go, see you when we’re done. Okay, pretty doll? Love you, bye.”

“See you soon, angel. I love you,” Bucky added.

“Bye, Stevie, Buck. Love you both.”

The minute the phone cut off, you found yourself at the bottom of a dogpile as your friends jumped on top of you. They were making all sorts of noises, some indiscernible. Only when you complained about being able to breathe did they get off.

“Who knew Cap had such a dirty mouth?” Morgan exclaimed.

Clark nodded, almost dropping his glass. “Expected that from Sarge but… you get both of them, how do you handle it?”

“You heard Sarge, she doesn’t,” Courtney laughed. She laughed even as you hit her in the arm with the pillow.

It was a pleasant surprise when Sam knocked on the door to Morgan’s apartment. Between the video, phone call, and the giggles that they could clearly hear because you seemed to forget they were enhanced, Steve and Bucky had called Sam and asked if he would take you back to the compound instead of you driving. So he had Happy drop him off and would just drive your car back. You practically pulled Sam into the apartment.

He could tell why they had asked. You and the others were giggling like crazy over the stupidest shit and there seemed to be no end in sight. While he refused the wine since he was the designated driver, Sam did eat off the charcuterie board. It was nice seeing you with recruits from your department that you actually got along with. Sure you had the team and other people in S.H.I.E.L.D., for instance in the IT Department, but it was important to have colleagues in your division that you could get along with. Especially because even though the Avengers were a special team, sometimes they went on missions with field agents.

Steve was two steps into the room when he saw you sprawled across their bed, taking full advantage of the fact that neither of them were there. You knew they were coming back around a couple of tentative dates so since two days ago you had started sleeping in their bed, aside from the time you crashed in their room when Sam took you home. It had been about six days since the wine night.

Since he was up as one of the trainers that week, despite having just come back from a mission, he stripped out of the suit and put on some gym clothes. He laid down on the bed next to you, centimeters away from your face, seeing if you would wake. It was maybe only two seconds after he started staring that your eyes popped open.

“Steve, you ruined my sleep. I had…” you reached over to check the time on your phone. “Forty minutes left, dick.”

“I’m sorry.”

“No you’re not.”

He laughed because you were right. “Just missed you, angel.”

You weren’t going to be able to fall back asleep so you crawled onto him, laying down on his chest. Steve thought you looked adorable as you looked at him with sleepy eyes. You scrunched your nose after he poked it.

“Me and Buck’s mission got split up so he’s not coming back till the end of the week. I was thinking we could on a small date tonight, pretty doll. Live show and dinner… your face, (Y/N).” Steve gently traced the area under your eye.

“What?”

He grabbed your phone and opened it for you to see the area was littered in red freckles. You looked in confusion and brought the phone closer to your face and then pulled it back as if that would change it. Steve noticed the way even you seemed surprised.

“That wasn’t there yesterday, I don’t think.”

“What did you do yesterday?”

“Ate breakfast with Sam, got my ass whooped in training cause Ryan’s a piece of shit, took lunch in the lab with Tony and Bruce. I went down to the simulation room, got my ass whooped again by bots. Team dinner… I ate the rest of you and Buck’s ice cream, not sorry about that.”

“You were fighting in training and then went to the simulation room?”

“Yesterday was not my day Stevie, glad Sharon was training us. I don’t think Nat would let me live down getting my head slammed against a mat multiple times. Took him down once with the thigh move though so little victory.”

“This time I think you actually pushed yourself too far.”

“Hmm?” You gave him a head tilt.

“I know last time it was…” Steve hesitated to say anything.

“Throwing up, bulimia. You can say it Steve, the word isn’t going to trigger me. Out of anything, it’s the medical term.”

“Well, last time it was that. But you’ve been doing fine, remember Dr. Cho said it could happen from overexertion. Yesterday seems to count.”

“I’ve gotten my ass beat before, Stevie.”

“Just telling you what I think.”

You sighed. “Okay… you’re not benching me today.”

“(Y/N).”

“We can’t just take breaks because we’re tired, bad guys don’t rest. Is there any blood in my eye?”

“No, just the capillaries underneath.”

“So I’m fine.”

“You were slammed into the floor by bots.”

“If I can flip you will you let me go to training, Stevie? I think that’s fair enough to show I’m not over worked.”

Steve thought it over and agreed. You had only ever been able to flip him twice before and that was at your peak fitness in the middle of the day on a good day. Right now it was early in the morning and you were tired. He felt that if you could do it now then maybe you were right, you might’ve pushed yourself too much yesterday but you’d be fine for training. You both stood up, you shivering as you left the warmth of the comforter. Steve had to refrain from teasing as you held up a hand to stop him because you had to yawn first.

“Okay, I’m ready.”

He came at you and you grabbed his wrist with one hand and shoved the other one into his shoulder. There was a bit of struggle as you lifted him but his back was on the bedroom floor in no time. You stood over him, smiling, clearly proud of yourself.

“So, I’m off the bench. Right, Captain?”

He stuck a hand out and when you went to help him, he pulled you down making you laugh.

“Just don’t work yourself too much. You can still get sick from pushing too hard.”

“I’ll be careful, Stevie. Just don’t let anyone give me punishment today.”

Steve leaned into your ear. “Oh no, pretty doll. Your punishment is waiting for when Sarge gets back.”

You shivered. Steve pecked your lips and then kissed your cheek. The two of you got off the floor, Steve mentioning you still had twenty-five minutes left before the alarm but you had given up all hopes of going back to sleep. So the two of you decided to go downstairs for breakfast and look at the restaurants near the live show to pick where to go.

He didn’t make it obvious but Steve was watching you intently as you scrolled through the phone while eating the omelette and toast he fixed. You absentmindedly nodded after a particularly good bite and then held the phone out for Steve, who had ducked his head down before you had a chance to cast your eyes up.

“This place looks nice. It’s supposed to be traditional and authentic Italian, the pictures of the pasta look good.”

Steve relaxed. You had eaten almost all of the breakfast he made and suggested a place with hearty food. And he made note of what you had said you ate yesterday, lots of his and Buck’s video calls with you were over meals.

“Doesn’t look bad, doll. You think we’ll need reservations?”

“Nah, seems mom and pop. I bet their kids made the website for them but I don’t think it’s a place with a long waiting list.”

“Then it’s a date. Buck said you busted out a real pretty dress last time.”

“Would you like me to put on a fancy dress for you as well?” you asked with a bit of sass but entirely good natured.

“Please?”

You smiled and gave him a peck on the lips. “One pretty, rose number coming up.”

The two of you finished breakfast and Steve left to prep the training room while you put on gym clothes. You took Steve’s plate along with yours and threw away the little bit left over. When you heard the elevator doors close, you hung your head over the sink and aggressively shoved two fingers down your throat until you gagged. Looking at the mess in the sink as the water washed it down the drain, you kicked the bottom cabinet in anger. You had been doing so well. And now you had to go around hiding and ending video calls early with Bucky and Steve so you could throw up the little they saw you eat and throw the rest away when no one else was watching.

You gripped the edge of the counter to refrain from doing it again when you thought of how upset they’d be if they found out. Pulling yourself together, you got ready so you could go downstairs and start working out with everybody else. It was going to be a long day, the first half starting in the training room and then moving to counterintelligence training before being done.

You elbowed Courtney and Morgan as they, along with Clark, were trying their hardest to not laugh as Steve entered the room again and you all stood in a line. You saw the slight smile on his face before he became stoic and realized he and Bucky knew exactly what had happened and that your friends knew. You were just trying to figure out did you reveal it or did Sam? Considering Sam was more your ride or die than he was theirs, you assumed your silly drunkenness exposed you.

Today was technically a free day on the training schedule, so Steve figured he would prep all the stations and let the recruits decide what they wanted to do or even if they wanted to stay in the gym. He was getting suggestions from everyone, including the mock HYDRA base at the very back of the compound which sounded pretty enjoyable. The mock base was new, S.H.I.E.L.D. had finished it only last weekend. The thought was the floorplan could be rearranged to mimic a different building layout every single time and the trainer could type in whatever setting for the bots, constantly changing the simulation.

“How about you, (Y/N)?”

“Hmm?” you asked, clearly not paying attention since you were still trying to shush your friends.

The rest of the class naturally gave looks and were readying themselves in case Steve asked one of them what the punishment should be. Steve was internally smirking, not thinking the opportunity to fluster you was going to happen so quickly.

“I asked if you had another suggestion otherwise we’re going to the mock base.”

You paused to think if there was anything else aside from the base that might be enjoyable for a relaxing training day just like Steve hoped you would.

“I expect an answer, recruit.”

Morgan had to turn her head into Courtney’s shoulder as she tried not to laugh. Courtney and Clark were biting the inside of their cheeks as hard as possible to not make a noise. You went wide-eyed and started to stutter. Should Steve probably let it go? Maybe, but he wasn’t going to as you stumbled through the beginning of an answer. He moved to stand in front of you. It took all his willpower to keep his hands clasped behind his back instead of taking one to lift your chin up so you would meet his gaze since when you looked straight ahead like everyone else it wasn’t eye level.

“Do you need to stay behind recruit while the rest of your team gets started until you can give us a proper answer… everyone clear out and meet Agent Wilson at the mock base to get started. Seems one recruit would rather have a lesson today.”

The others cleared out, you watched them all start to file out while Steve’s eyes never left you. Your friends filed out last. They gave you thumbs up and wagged eyebrows behind Steve’s back as they walked out.

“You think he’ll make her run at his speed?” you heard someone ask.

“Hope he has her do his workout.”

“That’s too brutal, he trains like a MAC truck, she might actually die.”

“Well then, I hope he at least keeps her the whole class.”

That was the last comment you heard before the heavy doors slammed shut. Steve finally moved as his hands found your waist. His kiss started off sweet before the signature dragging of your lip between his teeth. Your hands that were fisted in his shirt moved to wrap around the back of his neck in attempts to bring Steve closer to your height, tired of having to stretch up to meet him. Steve laughed against your lips.

“Jump,” he mumbled.

You tensed up, Steve thinking it was from the command.

“Steve, I’m t—” you started to panic before changing the answer. “If someone comes in.”

“Promise they won’t, doll.”

You gasped when he didn’t command again but just lifted you up. Your legs instinctively wrapped around his center. Steve’s lips pressed to your neck, not enough to leave a hickey but enough that you felt him, as he walked towards the door. Your back hit it and Steve began to grind on you.

Between the door and his left hand, Steve easily had you pinned so he moved his right one to rub circles over your cloth-covered sex. You bit your lip to stifle a moan. Steve removed his lips from your neck to watch. Your eyes snapped open and your head dropped to look at Steve when his movements suddenly stopped.

“Wha— what, I was…”

“Sarge’s idea for the first part of your punishment. You didn’t think you’d get to finish without both of us here. Did you, angel?”

“But, that’s— but—”

“Safeword?” Steve asked.

You shook your head. Steve stepped back and lowered you to the ground, opening the door so you guys could walk out and head to the mock base.

“Then take your punishment, doll. Maybe if you’re good, I’ll be able to convince Sarge to let you cum right away when he gets home.”

“Aren’t you Captain? Why do we have to ask, Sarge?”

The hallway was empty but you were aware it was still a risk if someone came around the corner as you put your hands on Steve’s chest. You reached up to try and kiss him, hoping you could convince him to agree and shove you back into the training room to finish getting you off. You thought it might have worked as Steve started to lean down. He grabbed your arms from his chest and held them away from him.

“You just made your punishment worse.”

“Wait, no,” you whimpered.

“Training. Let’s go, your team’ll probably halfway through the first simulation by the time we get down there,” Steve said.

You looked at him with a dropped jaw that he met with a sickly sweet smile that he usually gave at Tony’s parties to people that came up to him. You closed your mouth and stomped off.

“You’re being a brat, angel.”

“Don’t care. You and Sarge are mean.”

He laughed and followed you to the mock base. You wouldn’t look at him the whole time except once when only Sam was watching to poke your tongue out at him before running into the base with everyone else. Sam laughed, even though he sided with you on principle alone, when he heard why you were suddenly giving Steve a cold shoulder.

Of course you weren’t actually mad or very annoyed with Steve. That was confirmed when you finally shot him a smile as you all left the mock base for lunch. And then again when he winked at you across the cafeteria and you subtly blew him a kiss, Clark who sat right in front of you pretending it was for him to help throw anyone off. You mainly pushed around the salad, taking a bite every now and then because you knew Steve might be watching.

It was easy to pretend that you just hadn’t noticed you didn’t eat that much when you were talking with Courtney, Morgan, and Clark because people would just assume you were too engaged in conversation to remember to eat at the same time. You left to go to counterintelligence. Studying up on mental exercises was just as important as working out. There was no point in being a good field agent when it came to fighting if you had no smarts.

Like expected, classes ended with just enough time for you and Steve to get ready before having to head downtown for the show. The same way you thought it was cute if you and Bucky got dressed separately, you made Steve do the same. He didn’t really see how it made a difference but you insisted it added some specialness back into it since you guys lived together, so he went along with it and got dressed in his room while you went to yours.

The rose dress was a short number— not bodycon, somewhat frilly— that you had worn a few times but never on a date. Because of the zipper that allowed you to put it on from the bottom, you decided to do your hair and makeup first. The foundation easily covered up the broken capillaries and you were back to looking by before. You spritzed your favorite perfume and gave your head a once over to make sure everything was set before grabbing your dress.

Your breath caught in your throat as you pulled on the zipper. It wouldn’t go up. You pulled it down and tugged it up your side again but it got stuck again, a little higher than before. Your breathing got shallow as you muttered no and tried again, feeling tears threaten to spill from your eyes.

Steve was in the elevator headed to your floor to knock on the door and pick you up. He was a little more dressed up being in a suit but not fully formal like a tux would be. Steve heard the retching as he got close to the door and barged in without even bothering a knock. He reached your bathroom to see you hunched over the toilet, dress halfway zipped.

“(Y/N)?” he asked hesitantly and watched as your whole body froze.

“No” you said barely above a whisper, not moving from your spot.

He watched you snake a hand up to flush the toilet. Stepping from the doorway, Steve walked further in and you closed your eyes as the footsteps grew nearer. His touch felt burning hot on your shoulder and you shoved him off.

“Don’t touch me!”

You sunk back away from the toilet, staring at your dress. Steve stared at the hand that you still had dangling over the toilet, two fingers covered in evidence. It was the first time he had ever seen you do anything. You let the tears flow now, streaks of black from mascara and eyeliner already starting to run down your face.

“I fucked up.” Your clean hand picked at a piece of lint on your dress.

“I fucked up. Sam picked me up and we stopped at a diner so I wouldn’t be hungover. Then I felt like shit because it was past 10:30 when I ate, way past. And then you and Buck called and it was before run time but I ate breakfast early anyway and I’m not supposed to do that.”

“Doll, those rules are arbitrary.”

“No, no. They’re there so I don’t get fat and look what happens when I don’t follow them. I ate you and Buck’s ice cream for dinner and other things and none of it was good.”

“Is that what you consider bingeing?”

You nodded as you slowly got up to wash your hands and brush your teeth, still having not looked at Steve the whole time.

“We watched you eat over video, those were all normal size maybe even a little sm—”

“Too big. They were too big and I broke the rules and now I can’t fit in the dress,” you said with a mouthful of toothpaste.

You were growing irritated that Steve wouldn’t drop it. You wanted him to leave so you could just fall asleep and act like he didn’t witness any of it in the morning, you were probably going to sleep in your own room that night. Steve stood up from where he had bent down to initially check on you and walked over to where you were staring at yourself in the mirror. You were silent as his hands slowly placed themselves on you but you didn’t shake him off this time.

“This dress?”

He pulled the zipper up all the way and closed the little clasp. You looked down at it, shaking your head in disbelief. Steve’s hands left you. The zipper hadn’t been hard for him to close at all, considering the dress still had room once it was all the way on you.

“But it didn’t… I saw it wouldn’t zip.”

“The zipper must’ve hit a snag,” Steve said.

What he wouldn’t tell you was that it zipped with no problems. There were no snags or loose threads. You had convinced yourself it didn’t fit. Whatever you saw blocked you from seeing reality and you genuinely imagined it wasn’t closing.

“The red freckles, you’ve been throwing up since our first call.” It wasn’t a question.

“Yes.”

“Why didn’t you tell us?”

“I thought you two would— I didn’t want you guys mad at me. I said I would get better.”

“We would never be mad about it. It’s a real problem you’re going through, us yelling isn’t going to help you with anything… we asked you to let us help you. You have to mention a relapse for us to do that. We’ll never yell, no judgement.”

“Okay,” you mumbled.

“Will you take a walk with me?”

You took Steve’s arm, not noticing him grab the makeup bag on your counter. You looked in confusion when the walk was to their room, more specifically the bathroom. Steve asked if he could lift you up and you let him sit you on the counter. He pulled out your makeup wipes, riding your face of the black streaks down your cheeks and the smudged lipstick around the mouth.

“Your hair’s perfect, you really pulled out all the stops with it. I think a lip color closer to your lips would really emphasize it.”

Steve rummaged through your bag until he found a color slightly darker than the tone of your bottom lip. Applying it gently, he stepped back and admired his work. His hands danced up the sides of your dress again, playing with the zipper before gently pulling it down.

“I think maybe we should have our date at home. What if I drew you, is that a good date idea? Will you let me draw you, pretty doll? Capture how you are. That seems like a fun date night?”

“I’d like that.”

You followed Steve to the couch in their room. The dress fell off of you and he carefully peeled off your underwear, wanting you to trust him and not feel too vulnerable. You let him direct you in a pose as he set a soft, decorative pillow underneath your head. Steve grabbed one of your largest headscarves from the drawer of the nightstand on Bucky’s side. He draped it, rather artistically, over you.

“FRIDAY, please play classical music.”

You watched Steve flutter about for all his art supplies as the first note of the piano played. He taped up a decent sized cut of paper. He began to draw, eyes with a new air of focus. Since he wasn’t working on your lips till the very end, Steve asked for you to tell stories of your childhood. Things you remembered or whatever you used to enjoy.

It wasn’t hard to draw you, he honestly probably could do it from memory. Steve was intentional to draw you exactly as you were— not someone else’s idealized style and not in your warped perception either. He was sure to get every birthmark, mole, anything that made you, you.

You took a short break, Steve leaving to get you a smoothie, knowing it was the one thing you would eat. He was good at being a quick sketch artist, able to capture details in a short time. So while this drawing was taking a long time because he wanted it as right as possible, Steve was able to finish it and color it. He grabbed various copic markers and walked to the couch. You turned from the side pose you had been holding to lay flat on your back as Steve straddled you. He placed a scrap piece of paper on your stomach and began to play with the markers, blending the colors until the paper matched your skin.

“There we go. Why don’t you take a shower and get ready for bed, angel? Let me finish up the drawing.”

Steve blocked your view from the drawing as you walked into the bathroom. He got on the phone as he colored to let Bucky know what all had happened. You had voiced concern on wanting to tell him but not feeling like you could will yourself to say something again.

“Is she okay?”

“I think she’s fine now, Buck. But you never know.”

You came back out and Steve told you to sit on the bed because he wasn’t quite done yet. The headscarf he draped over your for the portrait was the one you used to tie your hair up. Steve finished up and informed you he was going to shower, finally revealing the drawing to you. You traced it with your fingers, admiring the work. You wiped at your eyes, not wanting tears to drop on his work. Steve came back and crawled into bed with you.

“That’s what we all see… well, Bucky and I are the lucky ones to see the whole thing.”

You chuckled. “I want to frame it. It’s beautiful, thank you Steve.”

“Of course, pretty doll.”

You set down the drawing and tangled yourself up with him. Steve petted your arm and traced gentle patterns on your skin. He pressed a kiss to your head. Steve watched you for a minute.

“Angel?”

“Yes?”

“I’m happy for your existence. That you’re here with us.”

(end)...

#stucky x reader #avengers fic #marvel fic

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ambreiiigns · 2 years

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wait i wanna like. for no reason but i wanna elaborate on the Squads Tags or people i mention in the tags sometimes. i wanna talk abt me friends :-) i'm taking this chance to talk abt me friends

notabili pinguini is perhaps . my main squad. top 3 main squads possibly ? . never met Any of them irl Yet but like they kinda feel like irls.... like. they're the /online/ squad i've had for the longest time (2017?!?!?!?! a little earlier but we made the gc in 2017 i think) and we're all italian and idk it feels like irls 🥰🥰 and two of them ARE irls now . so. 🥰 ya kno 🥰🥰🥰🥰 i do not know what person i would be without them fr. they shaped me. unfort they did. so Pinguini it's (me) karen mike & Nis

Nis is. ne tag is abt Nis 🥰 Nis is so special Nis is easily my bestest friend and easily one of the people i care the most in the universe ? like. right next to close family is where i'd place Nis i think. in terms of how much people matter to me . & ne is a word?pronoun? we made up to talk abt Ourselves. it's just me but we an n bc both our names start with N and this letter Bonds us and also it's a mix of me+noi(we/us). like. bit of a gollum/sméagol moment when we talk abt us tbh. bc we say we're like,, one person split into two idiots. my bitter half. plato's soulmate theory -esque UGH!! she's so special we agree that just saying we're Best Friends simply doesn't cut it so we always feel like we need to explain our dynamic to? convey? how special it is well enough ?!?! so this is why i get long-winded when talking abt Nis. sorry to anyone who's ever had to listen to me talking abt Nis. it's been a liddol messy a liddol complicated this year w ne but we're fine now. not as well as we used to but! can only get better from here. & i love her so much

then. if i ever mention I Porci. it means pigs. but i'm not using that to talk abt the cops for once in my life ‼ for some reason my actual irls decided to make that the name of the squad :^) and we're all like. we've all been friends since kindergarten. sometimes on and off y'know you kinda drift apart after high school starts cause most of us went to different places but for the most part we lichrally stuck together our whole lives so far. and i lov them so much! god!!!!! i grew up w those bastards i've known them so long!!! aaaaa!!! and we always fall back together and it just. it's good it's so good

le guglielmine is. a bit of a doxxing moment bc it's almost a last name to some of us? this doesn't make sense. i mean. not all of us use (a version of) that as a last name bc family tree but. it's our half of the family's last name kinda. i'm Not going to explain it any better so let's move on. it's just my three cousins sara serena & vanessa mostly. permanent girls night out w us whenever it is that we hang out which is Often as fuck esp when hot girl summer starts. this year looks like we're gonna be together 24/7 again yass we're planning to illegally camp on the beach Or get a motel like losers this year idk. anyway ANYWAY! occasionally the squad also includes my liddol brother (gioele) my other cousin (dennis which is sara & vanessa's younger brother) and serena's boyfriend (antonio) . the three Boys aren't permanent sometimes antonio simply cannot come over and most of the time gioele & dennis simply Do Not want to hang out w us so. >:( at the core it's Me Sara Serena & Vanessa and we ROCK sara & vanessa are sisters serena is Technically their aunt (their dad is her brother) and i'm simply a cousin but we were all born like. in the span of five years (serena first. then sara next year. then me next year. then vanessa two years later) we are Too Close in age and we spent Too Much Time together growing up so we all truly just grew up together like we were all batshit little sisters we have the most fun and three out of four of us are gonna move in together by the end of the year for uni reasons !!! and i could Not be more excited!!!!! i wish it could be all four of us but serena does not care to go back to school (queen) the dream Is to live all together at some point obviously but we'll get there. they're my best friends xx

honorable mention to Gioele my beloved brother he is Everything to me i would kill every person i mentioned so far in cold blood for him but also he has so many scars on his arms from my nails . i'm 20 years old and we're still on the floor beating each other up like kids almost every day after dinner and it's Fine it's Ok i love him so much. nicknames for him include Jeremy Fisher (like the salad finger puppet guy. no reason i just liked to say that name out loud at the time so i stuck it on him i still have his phone number saved as Jeremy Fisher) or lately it's mostly been Gioia (which does mean Joy and it is because he does bring me so much joy but also just bc his name sounds similar lmao)

i got tags for some of my discord server squads such as the cliche (not a typo. not one WE made at least we just decided to call ourselves that to spite our biggest enemy) and i THINK i have sort of a tag for the taxers and i KNOW i have a triumvirate tag which is abt. me and two specific taxers (mud & anna who also have their own solo tags as a treat <3) unfort i'm Shit at keeping up too many conversations and i lost track of discord a long time ago but they??? they mean so much to me! all of them! ahhhh

in the same spirit i wish i had either a squad tag or individual tags for like. dee emi sin lucy & enj and. maybe i will have those tags. i plan to have some version of those tags but... gotta work on it i dream of it at night

#oh nay #just 🥰🥰🥰 friends time #don't mind me. or do mind me if you wanna know my business #if you've ever wondered what the fuck is up w that penguin tag this is your chance ig

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llycaons · 8 months

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ep31 (1/2): things are not so bad yet

tw: eye horror

I had to watch this on my mobile hotspot because my apt's wifi sucks in the living room :( anyway this is one of the most fucked up episodes in the show

but first: a happy boy planting lotuses. bare legs look. he's so handsome I love him

wq watching fondly 🥰 you know I love a lesbian wq reading but there's subtext in this episode that points readily to her having a thing for wwx

there's also subtext that she has a thing for jyl so pick your tragedy ig. the one sibling she definitely isn't into is jc

I love this face it's so cute!!

like here. she sees the invite and pauses heavily on lwj's name. wq isn't a selfish person by any means, but it's easy to see her settling into their lives here, content, with wwx, only to be reminded that the outside world - and someone wwx shares a deep connection with - is still out there

but when she hands over the invite, she only mentions jyl. so who can say

previously, wwx tried to keep wq from discovering the visit from his siblings because he didn't want to make her feel guilty, I think. but she doesn't seem guilty now, she just seems...taken aback. a little reluctant, if still perfectly pleasant. it's easy to read as self-denial. I think in her life, whatever she's wanted, wq has practice in self-denial for the sake of the group. that's something that lends itself rly well to a wlw reading

I thought it was three month/100 days this entire time....we went to my cousin's three-month, they rented out the whole upstairs of a restaurant and we had like eight courses. she's like, nine? now

I always feel bad for this baby in this scene. wonderful symbolism and all, it comes back really well later on. but this poor child is clearly not having a great time at the shoot

STOP this hurts so bad. wwx loved jl so much already and worked so hard and wanted to give this gift to him!!! and he never will know!!!

okay this is one of the things that was much better done in the book. in the novel wen ning attacked jzx BECAUSE of wwx's animosity towards jzx, long-held since childhood. obviously wwx didn't want to kill jzx in that moment, but he really did lose control of wn and wn acted on what he perceived wwx's feelings to be

in the show it was su she taking control of him and directing him to kill jzx, which despite my bias even I can agree is a weaker dramatic narrative

what a way to start this fight. wwx was almost DEAD dead

LEGEND. zixun has had altercations w wwx in the past and is a prominent member of the jin family, so the fact that wwx didn't remember him is genuinely so funny

YESSSS tell him

THIS EXPRESSION IS SO FUNNY. the doubt.jpg. like 'you really think you can do that? YOU? kill ME?

well he can still hurt wwx with his words I guess 😭

oh he tried so hard. he had such good intentions. he would have been a good dad

I find this aside neat bc we barely see jyl with other jins. jzx has accepted her into his family but is willing to go over her head for revenge and apologize later. and he's clearly panicked and afraid about this curse, which is really nasty

BUT jzx is loyal to his wife!

zixun talking about wwx like any association with him is a stain that will affect everyone he comes into contact with is so representative of how the cultivation world sees wwx and he knows it. they're talking feet away from him

FUCKED UP!!!!!!

IT'S NOT PARANOIA IF THEY'RE REALLY OUT TO GET YOU

if wwx had agreed to stand down, I don't think jzx would have tried to kill him. but who can say what zixun or the panicked archers would have done. and once they get to koi tower, I don't see any way out for them

dang, fucked up

and then-

you can see the instant he goes FUCKKKKK

DROPPING HIS SWORD HE DROPPED HIS SWORD

#cql re-rewatch

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thedaughtersofaewora · 2 years

Text

“Baby, you're all that I want, when you're lying here in my arms

I'm finding it hard to believe we’re in Heaven.” (Heaven - DJ Sammy)

Grief-stricken and traumatized, my father suddenly found himself King. The crown was supposed to go to my uncle, Prince Cedric, but he had died a few years before.

There was no choice. His twin wasn’t fit to be king, as he had a wild side to him. And the youngest was grandmother’s favourite — never did she want to lay down more problems at his feet. My father did know he had to be king, but the attacks on Hyocheon were so sudden, he did not even imagine he was going to receive the crown so soon.

They kept the news away from my very pregnant mother at the time, fearful of the stress that would be put on her if she knew.

On August 1st, 1999, my cousin, Princess Ami Jade Miracle of Aewora was born. Royal name Miyeon. She was born in the Castle.

The next day, the pain was unbearable for my mother. She desperately wanted the baby out now.

She thought it’d be much easier and less agonizing after giving birth to three other children. She thought she’d be used to it. How wrong she was.

Mother was sweating profoundly, her red curls stuck onto the sides of her lovely face. She hardly cared that she was about to break her own mother’s hands.

“Remember to keep taking deep breaths,” her mother reminded her.

“Yes, I know!”

“Do you need water, dear?” asked father, who had stayed up all night with her the night before and possibly will do again the upcoming night.

“No!”

Mother sat back on the hospital bed.

“Lucky Freya.” She thought.

Night came and night turned to morning. Mother had only slept for an hour.

And it was time.

Push, take a deep breath, and push.

Mother was about to scream at the doctor to grab the baby’s head and pull her out, and then she felt most of the pain fade.

The baby girl slid out, and relief flooded the young mother.

That relief was short lived as she realized she heard no cry. Mother’s heart pounded and she panicked. “Why isn’t she crying? W-“ She attempted to sit up but was stopped by her mother, who softly pushed her back onto the bed.

Moments later, a cry rang out.

The doctor cut the baby’s cord and cleaned up the squirmy, crying little person.

My mother could see the top of the baby’s head peeking out from the pink blanket she was wrapped in as the smiling Japanese nurse handed her over. “There you go, she’s a pretty one.”

She closely examined the baby girl. The baby had a head full of red hair, surprising mama. She had created this picture of their first daughter having glossy raven hair, like our father.

“Wow, she looks just like you. An exact copy. Both of my beauties.” said my happy father.

“I agree, it feels like I’m in the delivery room holding you all over again. That’s how you looked like! Like a baby angel.” exclaimed my grandmother.

My mother laughed softly.

“And for a tiny angel, she absolutely kicked hard and without mercy.” She turned to look at my father.

“Thank you.” she whispered to her husband.

“Huh? I’m confused as to why you are thanking me.”

“Because you gave me her.” Mama smiled. “This little beauty... my first daughter. She’s a gift. I love her so much. I know her big brothers will protect her, always.”

Father said nothing, instead nodding and returning the smile.

“Have you guys chosen a name?” asked grandmother.

My parents looked at each other and then at grandmother. “No..” they replied in unison.

“You guys had nine whole months to pick out a name!”

Mama and father couldn’t stop staring at their baby’s sweet face. When the unnamed baby girl opened her eyes, both parents were in awe. The baby had exquisite golden eyes. It was not hazel, nor a common brown. It was a glowing, yellowish-orangeish colour.

The baby girl smiled at her adoring parents. She was absolutely beautiful. Our father said, “her eyes are just as gold as the flag of Aewora.” And then he began to call her his “golden girl.”

The baby, it was clear now, had Harlings disease.

I know I’ve mentioned this disease when talking about my relatives. But this is where you’ll find more about it. This particular disease was not dangerous or life-threatening, not one that was to be worried about.

It’s rare, and only seen in people with Aeworan or First Nations ancestry; proven again that both people are undeniably closer and similar to each other.

People with the disease are born with light yellowish-orangish eyes, and remains that colour throughout their life. However, the colour changes in certain lighting. Sometimes, my sister’s eyes would even turn green in a darker lighting and then it will go back to her normal colour in a regular lighting. In the sunlight, it turns to a complete dark brown, almost black, and then it returns to nornal when not in the sunlight. The sufferers’ eyesight is not affected by this strange disease in any way, although, their skintone may look yellowish, and their urine, during some long periods, turns dark yellow. These also does not harm the sufferers.

Legends say those who have this disease are closer to the Creator than people who do not have the disease, and that they have a purer spirit.

Grandmother Jules sat down with the baby girl in her arms in the other side of the room as my father scooted closer to my mother.

“I’m sorry to rain on this joyful event.. but Annika, dear, there’s something big I have to desperately tell you. And I didn’t want to, neither of us, wanted to tell you while you were pregnant with her.”

My mother couldn’t mistake the stricken expression on his face. She knew it must have been serious to break it in the middle of this happy moment. Her heart plummeted.

“W-what is it?” My mother asked, her voice shook as she did so.

“Annika, dear. Such terrible, grievous news-“

“Just tell me already! Don’t beat around the bush!”

“Hyocheon was attacked this July by Japanese imperialists. My father was murdered in the attacks, and so many other people died along with him,” father paused to take a deep breath. A sudden chill of horror froze my mother. “And now I am going to be king, and you will be queen.”

Mother sank back into her bed. Paralyzed by grief by what happened and worry for the future.

The new baby girl’s royal name was Areum, a name our late grandfather chose before he was murdered. For three days, every landmark in the kingdom were turned pink to celebrate the births of the new princesses despite the gloomy period of mourning.

Since balloons and gun salutes were made illegal in the kingdom long ago, the citizens captured butterflies and set them free into the direction to Japan, Heaven’s birthplace. It was an act of reconciliation and a celebration of the mixed Japanese-Aeworan princess, thus the media giving her the title of The Reconciliation Baby. The media believed the birth of this baby will further reunite Japanese-Aeworan relations. Japanese-Aeworan living in the kingdom were more than happy to hear of her birth. They considered her “their little girl.” So they called her, “Our Areum.”

Our parents did not officially name her yet. Our parents and our grandparents had a discussion. Suggestions were: Anna, Belle, Sophia, Emma, Ella, and Mary. Our dowager queen grandmother remarked, “I detest such ugly names.”

Finally a nice suggestion came, one that our dowager queen grandmother approved of.

The baby girl was going to be named Heaven-Leigh. For only a moment, she was the only girl in Aewora with that unique name. Then all the expectant Aeworan mothers in late 1999 and early 2000 named their baby girls Heaven-Leigh.

But our family called her Heaven instead. Simply Heaven, without the Leigh. Our family had their own reasons to call baby Heaven-Leigh “Heaven”.

My mother called her Heaven because she was “heavenly.” My father called her Heaven because that’s where “she came down from.” My dowager queen grandmother called her Heaven because “it’s a name fit for a lovely, irresistible little angel.”

My sister was thought to be the prettiest of all Aeworan babies. Even the Japanese midwives in the Nagoya hospital she was born in constantly looked at the baby with delight and amazement. Our father said she was indeed a healthy, chubby baby as one proud father could hope for. Our dowager queen grandmother, who thought of almost all infants as ugly creatures, was in awe of how “ethereal” my sister was when she first came to the kingdom from Nagoya. My grandmothers would endlessly fawn over the baby girl’s long feathery eyelashes, the red hairs on her perfectly round head, chubby cheeks “as pink as a camellia” and those delicate, porcelain fingers she had. Were they going to dance over the floral white keys of the piano? Had she inherited our late grandfather’s talent? Our dowager queen grandmother saw her own father in those eyes. David Baxter, our great grandfather. She knew he had passed it on to Heaven.

My grandmother had rambled on about how the weirdest-looking child she ever had, created the most gorgeous grandchild. She almost couldn’t believe this little girl was her grandchild, that precious girl was part of her. A dream come true, in the middle of nightmares.

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meloniave · 2 years

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"You think he hates you?" (Part 1)

This is my first time writing and I'm still learning so I'm sorry if I made any mistakes 😭

Camilo x fem reader

Characters are aged up, Camilo is 20. Takes place 5 years after the rebuild of Casita.

For those who don't know, M/N means mother's name.

Part 2

Past:

"Here, let me help you!" You said as you approached a girl with green glasses, Maybe your age. "Thank you." She said. The both of you bought the planks.

Your body ached, but you were just so excited to help the Madrigals rebuild their home. You wanted to find a way to repay them for all their hard work. "Gracias for helping us, err—" The girl thanked you.

"It's Y/N. And your welcome, this is the only way I can repay the Madrigals." You answered. "My name is Mirabel." You two sat down and got to know eachother, until Mirabel was called back.

She stood up to say, "My hermana needs me, see you later Y/N! You should bring these buckets to Abuela." "See you!" You responded and headed to the buckets.

You were going to Mirabel's Abuela when you bumped into who you recognized as Camilo Madrigal. The two of you had met in town and occasionally talked with eachother. "I'm sorry! I'm so so sorry." Your hand brushed against his.

"It's fine mi vida. Watch where you're going next time." The boy avertes his eyes from you and went back to working.

"Mi vida?" You asked yourself.

You felt your little brother Lucas' hand on your left shoulder. "Come down for dinner."

"Y/N, do you remember the engagement we talked about?" Your mother asked as she gave you your food. "Yes.. Have you and señora Madrigal arranged the marriage?" She smiled at you, "We decided you will be married to Camilo Madrigal in 6 weeks."

You and Camilo have been very good friends with him over the past five years. And ever since your mother and his abuela decided to arrange a marriage for the two of you, he started ignoring you wouldn't even look at your eyes if he did talk to you.

Now you and your brother are up in your room. You closed your eyes. "Maybe he hates me..."

"Well he could just love somebody else right? Why did we even get arranged to this stupid marriage that destroyed our friendship?" Lucas mocks you, saying it dramatically as he poses as if he was crying. "Shut uuppp" You were going to go out when you brother grabbed your wrist.

"If you love him so much why are you even against this marriage?" He asked. "Well, you know Camilo. He's a person of freedom and he definitely didn't agree to this arranged marriage."

"And if you're gonna point out the fact that he calls me mi vida sometimes, you can go back to remembering that he does that to some other girls as well." You added. Lucas only shaked his head. "Did you ever even hear him say that to anybody else?"

Then, you went silent. "W-well.. No?" "Exactly. So be happy and stop worrying." Lucas exited your room and closed the door.

"Ughhh"

You and your mother knocked the doors of casita, because today was the day Camilo was supposed to propose. "Oh Y/N, there you are." Pepa greeted you. "Hola seno— mama." The lady had insisted you call her mama, because you were going to be wed to her son sooner or later.

"We are soo excited to have the two of you here. My hijo is up in his room getting ready." There was no sight of clouds on her head, meaning that she was truly happy for you to be here. Pepa went back to the kitchen to help her sister.

Your mother nudged your shoulder, "Go on dear. I will meet you later at the dinner table." So you went to find Mirabel, your best friend.

"Y/NNN! You're finally here." Mirabel said as she hugged you. "Hola Y/N." Dolores said. "Hola Mirabel, Dolores."

You and Mirabel talked about sewing materials as Dolores tried to hold her laugh.

Mirabel got a bit annoyed. "What's so funny?" She asked her cousin. The older one whispered something, and the both of them squealed in excitement. "What is it?" You wanted to know as well.

"Oh Y/N, I can hear Milo talking to my papa."

In the other room,

"But what if it goes wrong? What if she's literally hates this marriage." Camilo said pacing around nervously. "Cami you and Y/N have been very close over the years. I doubt she doesn't like you. Just treat her good and she'll love you for sure." Felix tried to calm him down. "Ughhhh just hurry up. The rats said Y/N's already here." Complained Antonio.

"Y/N'S ALREADY HERE?"

"That's what he said?" You asked. "Yep. Exactly what I heard." Dolores replied. "That's what he really really said?" You asked once again, this time blush all around your face. "Oh come on, you think he hates you? He's has had a crush on you for years and this was Abuela and Tia M/N plan to set you two up— oh.. I wasn't supposed to say that."

And that was it. You were freaking out. "HE HAS A WHAT ON ME?" Now that you think about it, before the marriage was announced Camilo had already started acting weird around you.

Sometimes he stared, mesmerized by your beauty, or he would shapeshift randomly when you complimented him. You also realized that the flirting was all real, and he really meant it when he called you mi vida. "Oh boy, tonight is going to be fun." Mirabel said to her cousin.

#camilo x y/n #camilo x reader #encanto #camilo madrigal #camilo fanfic #female reader

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bellesowl · 3 years

Text

kiss and make up

- multiple characters

⤷ atsumu, sakusa

genre: (an attempt at) angst to fluff ; established relationship, timeskip

synopsis: in which you have an almost relationship-ending argument

word count: 2.1k total - about 1k each

warnings: fighting (obv), being called a burden, the boys are kinda mean but they make up for it i swear

- a/n: tbh i was kinda getting sick of writing just fluff so i wanted to spice it up a lil! if this sucks i’m probably going to stick to fluff fics but i think it should be fine? this one also only has 2 characs cause idk how i would be at writing angst LMAO if this does well enough i’ll post the one i have written w kuroo and iwa <3 but i feel like this kinda sucks so oh well

- thank u @kybabi for beta-ing <3

- miya atsumu

you n atsumu have been together since high school which is why you’ve always been inseparable

you went to the same college & moved in together right after, but once he got his job with the jackals, he insisted that you didn’t work and focused on getting your master’s degree

you reluctantly agreed, if only to be able finish & earn your phd soon after

because atsumu is always busy, it’s kinda become commonplace for you to do the chores around the house- like doing the laundry or washing the dishes or cooking dinner for him

but it’s gotten to the point where he expects it

atsumu sighs, unlocking the door to your shared apartment. today’s practice was rough, it was a day of hard conditioning and bad sets and he wanted nothing more than a good meal and to cuddle. the first thing he noticed when he walked in was the mess. instant ramen bowls were scattered everywhere, empty coke cans and dirty napkins were all over the floor, and there you were, in the eye of the hurricane. the second thing he noticed was that there was no homecooked meal.

surprised, he walks into the dining room to see you, furiously typing away at your laptop with four different books surrounding you. you hear his footsteps and look up.

“hey baby! how was practice?” you ask with a smile

atsumu grunts in reply and gestures toward the kitchen, “so.. what’s for dinner babe?”

your eyes widen, “oh shoot! i’m sorry, i was so busy studying for this final that i forgot to cook. do you mind-“ you stop when you see him roll his eyes and head out.

“um, where are you going? you just got home?” you ask, following him.

“out. i have to get food somehow” he replies, “especially because my useless s/o can’t cook a goddamn meal for me” he mutters under his breath

you stop in shock because did he really just say that?

“i’m sorry, i don’t think i heard you right.” you start but he interrupts you

“i said, i have to go get food because someone is too busy to cook a goddamn meal. what do you even do anyways- well, besides spend my money? the least you can do is cook for me, god.” he finally turns to look at you but he feels his heart stop at the look on your face.

not wanting to escalate the situation any further, you try to calm him down, “tsum, hey, i’m sorry i forgot to cook okay? this is my last final before the year ends and i just can’t afford to fail it, so i’ve been studying all day. if you come back to the kitchen, i’ll make you something, okay?”

“i don’t want to eat your half assed attempt at a meal, y/n. the whole point is that you couldn’t get off your ass for an hour to cook when i make the money, i paid for the apartment, hell, i’m even paying for your school! is it really too much to ask for you to stop being such a burden and cook and clean everyday?” he fumed.

you gape at him, shocked that he would even say that. to hell with not escalating things

“at least i want to do something more with my life than hit balls around and retire at 35” you hiss, “and i do everything in this house! i do the laundry, i clean the bathroom, i cook - i do all the things you refuse to. and do i complain? no. i offered to get a job but you refused.”

you turn around to grab your laptop and your textbooks, “just- just do whatever the hell you want to, atsumu.” and with that you walk out the door.

atsumu’s heart drops when he realizes that you actually left. sure, you’ve had arguments here and there, but you’ve never left. he pulls out his phone to call you when he sees you’ve left yours on the counter. knowing there’s nothing to do but wait at this point, he begins to clean up and calls osamu over.

it’s already 3 am when you walk back into your apartment, and you blink multiple times when you open the door. it’s ... clean? you’re sure it was a mess when you left, so how would it be clean? you sigh, too tired to think about it more and walk into the kitchen. your eyes widen at the sight. not only is your favorite food on the stove, but there your boyfriend is, asleep on the dining table. you smile slightly, well that explains things.

“ ‘’mu, hey, wake up babe.” you kiss him lightly and shake him.

he grunts and sits up, “baby! i’m so so sorry for what i said. you are in no way, shape, or form a burden, i have no clue why i said that. today’s practice was just really tiring, but i know i shouldn’t have taken it out on you. just please-” he sighs, “just please don’t leave me again.”

your heart breaks your teary eyed boyfriend. “shh, of course baby. i’ll never leave you again okay?” you say, tugging on his arm, “cmon babe, let’s go to bed, okay?”

“mm okay my love.” he replies and practically pulls you into bed. “i love you, okay?”

“i love you too baby.” you reply

“to the moon and back?” he asks

“yeah, and to infinity and beyond.” you reply, your lack of sleep hitting you hard

“oh, i didn’t know i was dating buzz lightyear”

you let out a loud laugh and just like that you both fall into the same routine, love radiating off both of you in waves.

- sakusa kiyoomi

dating sakusa was,, challenging

it definitely took him a while to get comfortable with you

so you guys have been dating for a couple years now, and at this point he’s def clingy

however there still moments when he reverts to his old self

this just happened to be one of those times

“OUT! AND JUST LIKE THAT, EJP RAIJIN TAKES THE WIN AGAINST THE BLACK JACKALS!”

the stadium is silent before the ejp cheering section erupts in cheers. you stay silent, watching your team below. you watch as sakusa stills, still in disbelief. you make your way down, practically sprinting to your boyfriend.

he sees you on the sideline and makes his way over to you. you put on your biggest smile and attempt to make him feel better.

“you did great, kiyo! you’ll get them next time, yeah?” you beam, knowing how hard he’s been training to beat his cousin

he eyes you warily, not knowing what to say.

usually, sakusa gets pretty clingy after games, so you you move to give him a hug.

“don’t touch me” he barked, jerking away from you. “if you hadn’t been distracting me, we would’ve won.”

you stare at him, refusing to let the tears flow. you both turn when you hear a certain setter yelling at the opposing middle and you sigh.

“um, okay then. i’ll see you at home, yeah?” you ask

sakusa merely nods and makes his way over to his teammates. you look around to see if anyone saw what just happened and you lock eyes with your boyfriend’s cousin, who walks over.

“congrats on the win komori! you guys did so well!” you cheered

“thanks, y/n! and i’m sorry about kiyoomi. i’m sure you know he gets that way sometimes.” he explains

you smile and shake your head, saying that you’re used to it and you both bid your farewells. as you walk out of the stadium, you think back to how your boyfriend, the one person you loved with everything you had in you, utterly embarrassed you in front of his whole team. before you know it, silent tears start streaming down your face.

you enter your home and immediately rush to the bathroom. you draw yourself a bath and make some dinner while waiting. you assume that kiyoomi wouldn’t be home to have dinner with you anyways- and now that you think about it, you can’t remember the last time you had dinner together. after you finish your bath and eat your dinner, you decide to wait up for boyfriend and watch a couple episodes of your favorite show to pass the time.

kiyoomi walks into his apartment at around 1 am, completely and utterly exhausted. he kicks his shoes off and drops his bag on the floor. The rustling rouses you from sleep and you sit up.

“hey kiyo” you say with a yawn, “where’ve you been all night?”

sakusa ignores you in favor of getting ready for bed and you frown when he brushes past you.

“kiyo, babe, what’s wrong? you’ve been ignoring me all night and i-” you start but he interrupts you before you can finish.

“god, just shut up, y/n. can’t you tell i don’t want to talk to you right now? i’ve already had the worst day, i don’t need you making it any worse.” he snaps

"kiyoomi, look, i understand you’re upset but you shouldn’t take it out on me.” you reason, reaching out towards him, “listen, i’m here if you wanna-”

“i said, do not touch me.” he seethes. “you are so fucking clingy y/n, lord, let me breathe a little.”

with those words, you explode. “you know what, sakusa,” he flinches when he hears his last name come out of your mouth, “i think i have the right to want to spend some time with my boyfriend! i haven’t seen you in god knows how long- you leave before i wake up and i fall asleep in an empty bed. i’ve been working my ass off to get some time off to watch your stupid volleyball game and what do you do? you embarrass me in front of your whole team!”

you sigh, wiping away the tears that continue that continue to fall. “listen, i don’t want to fight right now. i’m going to go stay at a friend’s house for the night, alright? i’ll see you tomorrow” you say, grabbing your purse. “if you’re even home tomorrow,” you add under your breath.

sakusa is in shock. the moment he saw your tears start to spill, he felt an undeniable and unrelenting ache in his chest that only seemed to grow with every work that came out of your mouth. and when the door shut? sakusa fell on his knees, his heart dropping. he truly couldn’t believe he said that to you. now all he had to do was wait till you got home.

2:38 pm - you check the time on your phone before pulling out your keys. you hope you made the right move, choosing to come back home while kiyoomi was still at practice. you open the door and the sight causes your eyes to widen.

there, on the couch with your favorite flowers in hand, is your boyfriend. he hears the door open and stands up abruptly.

“y/n, my love, i am so sorry. i truly cannot express how horrible i feel, and i cannot begin to understand how you feel.” he takes a deep breath, seemingly holding back tears. “i- i do love you. i love you more than i’ve ever loved anyone in my entire life. i know i’m not the best at expressing it, but you mean the world to me- no, you are my world. without you, i don’t know what i would do. so please-” his voice cracks, “just, please give me another chance?”

you run towards your boyfriend, practically tackling him. “kiyo, baby, of course. i love you too, you know? you just can’t do that anymore, yeah? you shouldn’t feel like you have the right to embarrass me just because you had a bad day. and please, don’t call me clingy? i know i do stick to you like glue sometimes, but that’s just because i never see you anymore.” you reply.

“that will all change, darling.” he answers sincerely, “i’ll make more time for you, i swear. in fact, i’ll take the week off, how does that sound?” at the sight of your smile, he relaxes.

“that sounds wonderful, yoomi.” you answer

sakusa feels the weight that’s been dragging him down lift and he realizes the effect you have on him- you’re his breath of fresh air. he also realizes how utterly idiotic it was to push away the one person who could make him feel better.

it’s fine, he reasons, he’ll just never make that mistake again. he swears it.

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tommyspeakycap · 3 years

Note

hi could you do an imagine/ one shot where it’s a snow day and ur w his family and it’s just all cute w whoever u want :)

snow days and haribo rings

jack grealish x reader

Jack was thankful for having a big car when he woke up this morning. It became apparent most people would have their close to Christmas family get together deterred or even completely cancelled by the amount of snow that had fallen over the course of the evening and continued when you woke in the morning.

The best part was seeing you light up like a child, eyes wide and bright as you all but jumped up and down. Jack had laughed, his smile stretched wide as you stood out the back catching snowflakes on your hands and throwing toys for the puppy who kept launching himself into the thick snow. Jack admired you from the kitchen window, conjoined dining room sliding glass door still wide open so he can hear your giggles bouncing through the house as he constructed one of the only meals he could. His toast and cheese was immaculate though, bloody amazing.

“The little ‘uns are dying to see you.” Jack announces in the car as he pulls down his parents street. His little cousins do just adore you and he can’t blame them one bit. Seeing you play with them, giggling when they pile on top of you for hugs and kisses always awakens something in him he hadn’t noticed before. It made him very broody, especially at this time of year. “Really?” you beam, eyes lighting up once again as you turn to look at him for the first time since getting into the car. He was well aware of your eyes stuck on the little snow shapes that flutter into the front window and the snowmen that line the streets. Pointing out bigger ones and getting excited when you see kids out. “Look!” You squeal, pointing your finger against the window. “Snow angels!”

“You’re my snow angel.” He retorted, flirting shamelessly with a huge cheesey beam. You let out a loud laugh as you screw up your face. “You’re awful,” you snort, shaking your head. Jack laughs with you, pulling the car into park in the drive so he can lean over and press his lips onto your cheek, warmed by the heaters of the large range rover.

Jack helps you jump out of the car so you don’t slip, because despite the fact his dad has claimed to have shovelled the drive, it was covered again in a thick layer of powdery snow. Your boyfriend wraps you up in him immediately, tucking you into his side so close you practically become one person. Touch has always been Jack’s love language. He almost always has to be touching you and it’s usually a subconscious act. An arm that’ll find its way around your waist or his hand that slips into yours. He’s very tactile and he just loves to have you there in his arms.

Karen is at the door ushering you into the warm house before either or you have the chance to raise a cold hand to knock it and before you have the chance to enjoy the heat, Jack’s little cousins - who call him uncle Jack just for easiness sake - have threw themselves at you both. Jack catches them a lot easier than you do with bellowing laughter so happy you can imagine the sound in a few years time when he gets home from training or game trips and it’s yours and his kids that get to barrel through the house and greet him like this. It makes your heart sing in a mixture of excitement and joy.

“Come on come on come on!” They chant, tugging your arm quickly through the house as you call your greetings along the way. Jack is left standing in by the coat rack with a stupid grin watching his little cousins drag you through the house until you reach the back door.

Jack can’t seem to keep his focus on the conversation with his mum as they sit at the dining room table next to the window that looks out to into the garden. He keeps looking out to you, exaggeratedly falling over when you get hit by snowballs thrown by the small kids, yelling out as they bound over to leap on top of you with hysterically laughing, wrapped up in warm winter coats, hats and scarfs. You’ve only got a jacket on though and Jack worries as he always does that you’re not warm enough.

“She needs an extra layer,” Jack mumbles, making his mother beam as she looks at him with a warm mug of hot chocolate between her hands. She’s so proud of the man that her boy has become. The kind who worried about his girlfriend being too cold even in the summer. Jack stands at the back door uneasily waiting for you to reach him. “You’re going to end up sick.” He states with a frown as he hurriedly moves to wrap a thick scarf around you neck. “That’s a myth, can’t get the cold from being cold.” You shiver, allowing him to offer you a sip of hot chocolate from his mug to warm you up and you accept it happily.

“Can get hypothermia though, Mrs Degree.” He retorts teasingly, his eyes created with a smile. “Not a medical degree, J. And that’s Miss degree thank you very much.” You snip as you trudge back off the snow with him following you, setting the mug down before he stepped out the door. Jack immediately notices the excitement on his little cousins faces when you both appear for the the snowball fight where you split into separate teams. The snowball fight where you end up pinned down on the snow by Jack, his face inches from yours as his lips just about brush yours. Even chapped and slightly cracked from the cold, Jack would kiss those lips happily forever. He can’t fight the smile that plays on his lips at the sight of your nose and cheeks tinted red from the cold.

“I could change that, you know.” He hums softly, eyes getting lost in yours. You simply gaze up at him puzzled with slightly furrowed brows. “The miss thing i mean,” he backtracks, his words something like a nervous stutter, “Cause you’re my missus, could make you a missus- mine. My missus. Like, with my name an’ all that.”

You giggle at his broken up stammering sentences, your lips stretching wide into a grin.

“Are you asking me to marry you, Jack?” You lull, a teasing tone hiding clearly behind your words as he shakes his head, moderately embarrassed by his poor attempt. Jack clears his throat, rolling off you to lay beside you on the thick snow cushioning your back before he squished you. “Suppose so,” he whips his head to face you, “Depends on what your answer would be?” he adds quickly with a smile yet worried eyes.

“Charming.” You jest sarcastically, shooting him an playfully incredulous look. “But i’d say yeah.” You add, staring up at the darkening sky with snow flakes still falling into your faces, getting stuck in Jack’s beard and landing in his hair.

“Mhm, that’s good.” He smiles softly, “Mrs Grealish. (y/n) Grealish.” Jack turns back to you, a soft smile on his lips and love shining in his eyes. “Sounds pretty good to me.”

You giggle in agreement, letting him tug you in closer to him to kiss a snowflake off the tip of your nose before pressing his lips onto yours next. “Yeah, it does.” You agree with one of those wistfully love struck grins as you look at the man you love with all your heart. “I’ll get you a ring, i promise.” He says sweetly, brushing his warm hands over your cold knuckles after he tugs you up to your feet out of the snow.

“I have a ring, Uncle Jack!” You hear from behind you, the two little kids standing there with a mini party bsd or haribos each. They beam up at you, the eldest holding out the red and yellow candy ring that Jack takes with a thank you and a tenacity as if it were a real, very expensive ring that you wouldn’t eat within the next ten minutes. Yet, the brown haired brummie still takes a knee in the snow, holding your hand and looking up at you. “I promise i’ll get you a proper ring, nice one too. All the best for you. Get you a nice big ring a s a nice big family an’ i’ll spoil you, spoil you all. I’ll spoil you forever. Promise. Will you marry me?”

Tears appear in your eyes involuntarily, a giggle breaking past your lips as you nod your head virtually. “Yeah, yeah of course i’ll marry you. Now up her and kiss me before you get a chill.”

Jack stands up eagerly, pressing his lips against yours as he pushes that ring onto your ring finger for you to hold out in front of you to admire. As Jack kisses you once again before he starts leading you inside holding onto your hand, you can only think about how happy you are with him. You’d be happy to marry him in a tracksuit or pyjamas, you didn’t care. You just wanted to spend the rest of your life with him and he felt the same way. Fancy rings wasn’t a big deal for you, but you knew he’d get you one anyway because he’s Jack. He has the money and he would be dammed if he didn’t spoil his girl.

“You didn’t,” Karen gawps, shaking her head with a teasing roll of her eyes. “You better get that girl a real one.” She tells Jack as he sits there on the couch later with you tucked under his arm, “you make sure he does.” She says to you before she went off to the kitchen. You turn to Jack, the fingers of your right hand laced into his as you raise the left one still with that ring on it.

“Sweet tooth?” You chime with a smile, Jack chuckles. “Always.” He responds easily. You lift your hand up to his mouth and just barely feel his teeth against your finger as he takes a bite off of that ring. You pop the rest of it in your mouth with a giggle.

“We are my ring.” You say through giggles, feeling his press his lips against the side of your head. “I’m sorry baby.” Jack responds, pulling you even closer to him under the warm fluffy blanket as you curl into his chest.

“Don’t be,” you mutter softly, “i’m happy to marry you with nothing but candy rings we’ll eat before the days out.”

“Good,” Jack says firmly, tightening his arms around you, “Because i’ll get you all the haribo rings you like, forever and always baby.”

The ghost of a smile dances over your lips as fatigue catches up with you, echoing his words adoringly. “Yeah….forever and always.”

#jack grealish #jack grealish imagines #jack grealish imagine #jack grealish x reader #footie fics #football fics #footballer fics #football imagines

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phoenixyfriend · 3 years

Note

ok. karin vs anakin's genome being 50% the Force. go

Jesus fuck, okay. Uh, fair warning, I know very little about this subject, so it’s 90% bullshit. I am in no way qualified to talk about biology past the high school level.

Anakin's sixteen. He's part of a set of Jedi assigned to a weird mission regarding making contact with an isolated planet of near-humans with superpowers but no space travel. He doesn’t really have a Job here and now, he’s just there as Obi-Wan’s plus-one. There's an underlying plot about Sidious trying to acquire people from Ninja Land, but none of the Jedi are fully aware of it. Mostly they're distracted by all the ninjas and their bitching.

They call it the Shinobi Planet, because nobody can agree on a name for the planet when they ask and the last major international alliance was named after the shinobi profession, right? Good enough, you can change it later when you idiots can agree on literally anything, oh my god. The Samurai are very offended and it's a whole thing.

Anakin wanders a lot. He runs into various strange people and is mostly polite because, listen, half his friends are distinctly not human. When your immediate circle includes nautolans and besalisks and twi’leks and whatever the fuck Yoda is, you’re not gonna blink at a Hoshigaki or... uh... okay that kid just turned into a giant fox, is anybody gonna--no? That’s normal? Just him? Cool, cool, cool.

There’s a kage summit involved in the negotiations going on. IDK what’s being negotiated, probably something to get the ninjas to set up a singular spaceport so there’s somewhere to land WITHOUT ships being regularly shot down by village defense systems powered by that massive flaming purple skeleton warrior or the girl who punched down a mountain or the.. the literal desert? There’s a guy that can control the desert? Is there any way of keeping him away from Anakin?

(Gaara’s tickled pink that the reason someone wants to stay away from him has nothing to do with fear or respect for authority, and everything to do with ‘he is also from the desert and fucking hates it, so he’s staying away from the sand powers,’ because it’s very novel and kind of funny.)

ANYWAY where was I. Uh. Right, kage summit, lots of villages, they invite smaller villages to pitch in, but nobody ever ever ever wants Orochimaru anywhere near this situation, for hopefully obvious reasons, so Otogakure sends Karin.

Really, who else was it gonna be? Suigetsu? You want Suigetsu representing you on an interstellar political field? You want Juugo before he’s stabilized? You want Sasuke, master of ruining kage summits? You want these idiots representing you at the big kids’ table?

They send Karin. She’s a bitch with a temper, but at least she’s not as big of a political risk as... literally anyone else from the snakepit.

Anyway, Anakin wanders around, meeting people, trying foods, showing off when asked for demonstrations. He doesn’t have an Entire Protocol Droid, but he did cobble together a little floating helper that can do translations for him. Assume all translations are accurate and being done by the little helper bot. Bot’s name is G1-0T. Anakin calls it Glot.

He runs into Karin at one point, who’s not super into the whole situation, but at least Anakin’s interesting. She’s not interested in him, because he’s sixteen and she’s like... mid-twenties. And his hair is stupid. But! All these force-sensitive people feel weird to her, because sensor stuff, and it’s not chakra but it’s... something. Anakin is, of course, the weirdest.

(There are non-sensitives in the envoy, so she knows it’s not just a space thing.)

She strikes up a conversation about it, because hey, she hasn’t made it this far to not lean into... you know, being the kind of person who barges ahead with Weird Questions that might lead into fun science stuff.

Anakin is like. Well. This woman’s very strange, but it’s not like there’s anything against talking about midichlorians to random people. It’s easy enough to look up in the core. Not everyone knows about them, but it’s not a secret or anything.

“Wow,” Karin says, though not in so many words, “that sounds incredibly strange, and actually a lot like it functions completely differently from chakra, though maybe it intersects with nature chakra somehow. Can I take a blood sample?”

Anakin doesn’t want to give a blood sample to a stranger. Karin isn’t stupid enough to try to steal one. She’s seen what this Force Stuff can do, and this kid’s got a lot of it. She hasn’t got enough information on hand about it to know if he’d notice.

“How about I let you look at the blood of a guy that can turn into water?” Karin asks, because she’s not going to let him look at her blood. “I’ve got it with me.”

“...why?” Anakin asks, reasonably disturbed.

“He owes me,” she says, and does not elaborate.

“What, there’s nothing weird about your blood to share?” Anakin demands, like the ornery little bastard he is.

“People took my blood against my will for over a decade,” Karin says, with the kind of smile that threatens a stabbing. This is not secret information. Her healing factor is in the bingo book. Plenty of people still want her dead. “Nobody gets my blood except me.”

Anakin has no idea what to do with that answer. Most people wouldn’t know what to do with that answer. It’s not exactly a standard answer.

“So there is something weird about your--e chu ta what the fuck are those scars?”

Karin looks at her arm. She looks back at him. She raises an eyebrow.

“What do you think they are?”

He stares a little longer, and then very carefully does not say anything as she pushes her sleeve back down.

“So can I look at your blood?” she asks again.

“Uh--”

“You can look at mine under a microscope,” she wheedles. “You can’t take any, though.”

Anakin... does eventually agree. Eventually.

-----------

There is a very angry redhead yelling at a machine, and Anakin does not know what to do.

“Is something wr--”

“What the fuck is your blood?” she demands. “It’s glowing in ultraviolet. It burned the dye up. I tried to sequence your genome--”

“Woah, I did not agree to that.”

“--and look at this. Look at this!”

“I don’t know how to read your graphs. None of this is a language I know.”

“It’s garbage,” she hisses at him. Glot takes a few moments to process it. “Look at this. This is supposed to--fuck, where’s the Jiraiya file, he’s standard--this is what it’s supposed to look like for most humans with chakra. And this is a civilian, and a few bloodline users--”

“Do you just carry these around with you?”

“Shut up, you don’t exist. You have--you have more in common with summons than people. I ran a blood test on one of your human diplomats, the ones that aren’t monks--”

“When did they agree to that?”

“They didn’t, I’m just sneaky.”

“I should tell Obi-W--”

“STAY THERE, I’M NOT DONE YELLING YET. Do you see this? Do you see this shit? This is the one and only time I’ve managed to perform any kind of analysis on a bijuu. They don’t usually have blood. Shukaku is sand. Matatabi is literally just fire. This was almost impossible to make happen, but I did it because I’m a dedicated biomedical resea--”

“Because you’re unhinged.”

“--rcher, and you know what? You know what I’ve found?”

“What?”

“Your blood looks like you’re half demon,” she says, grabbing him by the shoulders and shaking, a little wild-eyed and clearly pissed at him. “Half of it’s human! Half of it looks like the non-physical chakra manifestations that were torn-apart remnants of a godlike demon. The fuckers can’t die. They also can’t breed. They don’t have reproductive organs! This isn’t just demon-tainted like a jinchuuriki, I’ve got that analyzed--”

“Why?”

“Because my cousin’s a moron, don’t change the subject. You--you shouldn’t exist. Your blood is stupid. Fuck, is this what I’d find if I analyzed the Sage of the Six Paths?”

“The what?”

She ignores him, frowning at papers. “Is--I need to call Haruno, she might still have some of Kaguya’s blood dried on her old gloves from the war, I know she kept those as a souvenir from the whole ‘punched a god’ thing.”

“I’m sorry, the what?”

“There was a thing a few years back, godlike alien demon princess who got sealed into a moon by her sons a thousand years ago, but her immortal sentient goo child brought her back with a giant tree that consumed all the tailed beasts-the flaming fox you saw earlier is one of them--and then used a giant eyeball to reflect off the moon to put everyone in a hallucination at the same time so she could eat our life-forces,” Karin dismisses. “It’s not important.”

“There is--what?”

Jedi see many things. Many of those things are very strange.

This is a little much even for Anakin.

“It’s over, if you want the actual details, talk to my idiot cousin,” she huffs. “But now I need to run comparisons between the actual nonsense that is your entire existence and the actual nonsense that is my cousin’s existence, and maybe Sasuke’s... fuck this is going to be a mess, I’m going to have to cross-reference all the clans with bloodlines we know are derived from Kaguya, she’s the only angle we have on gods like that, unless... maybe there’s still some black Zetsu goo somewhere... Orochimaru must have kept a sample...”

“Uh, can I--can I go? I’m not comfortable here.”

“I need to find Naruto so he can call the Sage of the Six Paths out of the afterlife so I can see if I can get blood from a ghost to compare to yours.”

#Anakin Skywalker #Uzumaki Karin #Karin #Karin Uzumaki #Naruto #star wars #mini fic #Phoenix Posts #Phoenix Answers Asks #this is so stupid and I have no idea what I'm talking about #bijuu don't even have blood but Anakin's has more in common with THEM than with humans

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