#and that's been ok for the last year bc i've just been at home

[taevbears]

Magic Shop - 12

Home is the place where, when you have to go there, they have to take you in.

⤑ pairing: OT7 x witch!reader, Namjoon focused ⤑ genre: magic au, romance, angst, hurt/comfort, found family, domestic/slice of life, action/adventure ⤑ rating: 18+ ⤑ word count: 11.2k ⤑ warnings: lol idk what it is about namjoon that makes me so feral but explicit & implied smut (penetrative, 34+35, face-riding, daddy kink), description of body horror, mentions of death & past traumas, pet names (baby). ⤑ note: lmao bc the way i've been working on this chapter since the end of last year, and it's FINALLY being posted. i've been in this weird slump with my writing, so i hope that this is ok lol. enjoy, and i'd love to hear your thoughts on the chapter! :)

Chapters: Series Masterlist | 09 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13

“You’re so annoying,” you complain, shutting the door behind you. Your next lecture is in half an hour, but Hoseok will be looking for you soon.

The two of you have about fifteen minutes.

“I’ll be fast,” Namjoon promises, already pulling off his top. His roommates aren’t in. They’re most-likely hanging out in the common rooms and won’t be back for a while.

It’s just you and him.

And the paramour secret that hangs between you two.

Your back is pressed against the door as you eye him. In just his slacks, he looks like sin. Tall and muscular, sun-kissed skin, broad shoulders and long arms. Blessed with the perfect body proportions. The hunger in your eyes grows the longer you stare.

“We shouldn’t keep doing this.”

It’s what you tell him every time, but you lift your skirt. His gaze automatically locks onto your thighs as he unbuckles his belt, and his cock twitches with interest when he catches a peek of your panties.

His voice is husky when he asks, “Should we stop?”

He already knows the answer. It’s the same as it always is.

“No,” you reply, tilting your head slightly. A daring gesture as a coy smile dances on your lips. You slowly loosen the buttons of your blouse one by one. His gaze lifts to your face as you whisper, “Want you, daddy.”

Namjoon wants you more.

Without another second to waste, his long strides close the distance between you two. Strong hands impatiently yanking at the fabric of your clothes as he leans down to kiss you at last.

Namjoon wakes, sticky with sweat.

The bed he’s on is bigger and more comfortable than the cheap bunk at his dorm. The white duvet – kicked to the floor at some point of the night – is thick and weighted; a godsend compared to the thin, itchy blanket he was given when assigned to his room. The bedroom itself, curated to his taste, is woodsy, minimalistic, and bold: favorite art pieces hang on the walls and decorate the space that reflect his current moods, a private library with books that frequently changes to new titles whenever he finishes reading some, and bonsais that he’s been taking care of are starting to bloom flowers.

It takes him a moment, but he realizes he’s no longer a student nor an enchanter at Blackstone Castle.

A sigh falls from his lips as he runs his fingers through his damp hair.

Another dream about you.

He’s been doing that a lot lately. Dreaming of you.

You, sneaking into his bed after lights out and everyone else is asleep. You, taking his hand and leading him into secluded places between classes and when things at the shop are slow. You, climbing over his lap with your hands steady on his shoulders as he holds your waist, loving the way you look on top of him.

Once upon a time, when all this initially started, Namjoon thought it’d never go beyond a physical affair. The two of you were clearly attracted to each other. When the stress of exams, a looming Harrowing, and the competitive streaks between you two became too much, you often sought each other out.

But at some point, Namjoon realized it was starting to mean something more to him.

At some point, Namjoon realized it was because he was falling in love with you.

And somehow, at some point, you started to fall in love with him too.

You, dedicated and hardworking, quiet and serious with your studies, and burning with a hunger for knowledge and an eagerness to test your limits. You, also kind and caring, loyal and protective of the people you love deeply, and who’ve dreamed of opening this shop of comfort to help people. You, who carries the warmth and radiance of the sun, beautiful in the way that starlights compliment the night sky, and yet look to the shadows of the moon at him.

Love to Namjoon is still… a new concept. 

There are days where he isn’t entirely sure what he’s doing or what the future holds with you. There are days where he questions why you even love someone like him when the others could be much better lovers.

It’s like fire. Pretty to admire, comforting to feel its warmth; a guidance of light through a dark and harsh world, but never to touch. Never his to claim and hold as the shadows of loneliness and insecurity grow around him. Love burns as fire does, leaving nothing but scalding embers and ash as its remains.

He loved his family, but they had easily given him up after he awakened his magical powers, even though he desperately ran away from towers and fortresses to beg for their forgiveness. He loved his hometown in the countryside, but he still remembers the look of hatred on the villagers’ faces once they found out what he was and deemed him a monster. He loved his friend, Ignis, and his untimely death by the cruel hands of hunters is still a burden Namjoon is forced to carry with him.

But there are days where love just feels… nice. 

Where, in the early morning, when he’s getting ready for a run by the river, you’d stumble down the stairs shortly after him with your hair still a bit messy from sleep and your eyes barely open, and simply ask if he wants coffee and breakfast with you now or when he comes back. 

Where, more often than he’d like to admit, a spell backfires and instead of changing the temperature of the shop, he ends up casting a sleeping spell on all the patrons, and you end up fighting your drowsiness to set things right, never once berating him or making him feel bad for any harmless accidents.

Where, after a long day, the two of you wind down together, sprawled in his library nook downstairs, not really talking to each other – too caught up in your own readings for conversation – but finding each other’s presence comforting nonetheless as he uses your thighs as a pillow while you absently run your fingers through his hair, or when you’d prop your legs over his lap as he gently massages your calves.

If Namjoon could write a million poems to describe how he feels around you, it still wouldn’t be enough. With you, he feels safe. With you, he feels comfortable. With you, he feels accepted, despite all his flaws and mistakes.

Namjoon loves you more than anyone he’s ever loved before. From the days you two were just students in Blackstone Castle to now. He loves the shop, the family it has brought together, the freedom of being himself – an ordinary man who likes books, nature, and art – without being condemned for his affinity to magic.

But like his family, his hometown, and even Ignis, he’s afraid that one day, you, the home you built with him, and the family you both found will all disappear.

And it’ll be his fault.

With a deep, frustrated sigh, Namjoon forces himself to sit up.

Before, he used to dream a lot about all the things he’s loved and lost. He recalls every detail of it: the day of his awakening, the fires that destroyed his home, how often he ran away to apologize to his parents, the screams of agony when he had to leave his only friend behind.

Now, Namjoon dreams about you.

You’re everything he loves.

You’re everything he’s afraid to lose.

“I’m heading out now!” Seokjin calls out, putting on his shoes by the front door.

“Okay, be safe,” you tell him, coming to the entryway to see him out. Seokjin promises he will and pulls you in for a kiss.

Behind the counter, Namjoon finds himself looking away.

Recently, Seokjin started his own guild with his friends from the Freelancers. After a mission involving mages went awry, they left their old organizations and started calling themselves the Oathkeepers. As a newly-established guild, most of their work comes from notices placed on the town’s community board, or word-by-mouth from people who’ve hired them before.

Things have slowed down a lot compared to how busy they were in their former guild. Seokjin was hardly home, and when he was, he was exhausted. While it’s nice to see the former warden around the shop these days, Namjoon can tell that the thrill of excitement and adventures are sorely missed, as well as the amount of coins he was able to collect after each successful quest they’ve completed.

“Can we go too?” Jungkook asks, already slipping a rucksack over his shoulder.

“Please,” Taehyung tacks on, honey-colored eyes wide and pleading as he stares directly at you.

Your lips part with an almost-spoken answer until you catch yourself, and helplessly look toward Namjoon with a face that’s just about ready to give anything the raven familiar desires.

Namjoon sighs. He can’t blame the two youngest for wanting to go with Seokjin. Whatever adventures he has planned today are far more appealing than being stuck in the shop all day. Even though, at the shop, Taehyung normally follows Hoseok around, and Jungkook quietly admires Namjoon doing mundane work.

“Sure, why not?” He decides with a shrug. “Be careful and listen to Jin-hyung, though.”

“Yes!” Taehyung and Jungkook cheer and high-five each other.

“Okay, okay. Let’s go. The others are waiting for us,” Seokjin urges before turning to you again. He kisses you one more time and adds, “We’ll be back before dinner.”

“Bye, hyung. Bye, kids. Look out for each other,” Hoseok reminds them, standing beside you with Yoongi in his arms. The black cat looks comfortable in Hoseok’s hold, pointed ears twitching as he turns his head to look at the others.

“We will,” Jungkook promises, nearly bouncing on his feet with excitement. A sheepish smile spreads on his face as he caresses your cheek and kisses you sweetly. “We’ll be going now.”

“Don’t miss us too much, darling,” Taehyung teases when it’s his turn, tilting your chin up and diving in for a goodbye kiss as well. He smirks at the flustered look on your face as Seokjin calls for them to hurry up.

As you watch them leave, Hoseok nudges you. There’s a knowing look on his face when he comments, “You look tempted to join them.”

“It does seem fun,” you acknowledge with a small sigh. Seokjin makes his quests sound so thrilling and perilous, even if you know he exaggerates a bit just to impress you most of the time.

Namjoon frowns and speaks up. “I’d rather you stay here.”

You turn to him, a bit defiant, and place a hand on your hip. “Why? Think I can’t do it?”

“Ooh,” Hoseok utters with a smile. He and Yoongi look between you and Namjoon with mild amusement.

“It’s not that,” he retorts, nearly rolling his eyes. He knows that you’re perfectly capable of becoming an adventurer and would be a great asset to the Oathkeepers. “What Jin-hyung and the others do is dangerous.”

“I can handle danger,” you tell him. Hoseok nods his head and agrees you can. Without looking away from Namjoon, you give your best friend a high-five.

“Here is safe,” Namjoon argues with a finality in his voice. He frowns when he looks at you. “And I don’t want you to get hurt.”

It occurs to you and Hoseok that Namjoon is being very serious.

“Namjoon, we’re just kidding,” Hoseok quickly assures him. “Neither of us are going anywhere. The shop is our responsibility.”

“Yeah. And even if I did go on a quest with Jin, you don’t need to worry about me.” You walk up to Namjoon and take his hands in yours. “I can handle myself, Namjoon.”

Words you’ve told him repeatedly, even before the night of your Harrowing back in Blackstone Castle. In the library where he’d always run into you.

“I know you can, baby.” He brings your hands to his lips and kisses your knuckles. “If it comes to that, just promise you’ll come back to me, okay?”

Before Jungkook was turned into a toad by an evil witch, he was an adventurer. He joined a guild with some same-age friends, traveled far from home, saw rare sights, fought challenging beasts, and visited beautiful places. Excitement and wonder were at every corner.

But this…

“Your grand task today,” Seokjin informs as he unceremoniously hands a stack of fliers each to Taehyung and Jungkook, “is to pass these out and put them around town.”

This isn’t it.

Jungkook glances down at the posters. Since the Oathkeepers are still new, Seokjin and the others have been trying to promote their guild and ask around for work. The neat calligraphy and the print of their symbol is a way to do just that.

“Actually, I think Hoseok-hyung might need my help at the shop after all,” Taehyung tries to back out. This isn’t the kind of quest he had in mind either.

“You’re already here. Just help out a little,” Seokjin pushes, holding out a flier from his own stack and handing it to someone who curiously grabs it. “This will help attract people to our shop too.”

Taehyung pouts, but relents. “Fine. But I want to go on a real adventure next time.”

“Hyung, I think I can finish my stack faster than you,” Jungkook suddenly challenges. 

Taehyung’s golden eyes light up with a competitive streak. “You’re on.”

“Wait,” Seokjin begins, suddenly feeling left out. He starts to shove his fliers in the arms of people passing by. “This isn’t a contest. You guys…”

Without waiting for Seokjin to finish, both Taehyung and Jungkook dart off to opposite directions. His hands work quickly as he slides the fliers under doors, sticks them on the walls, and hands them out to whoever he sees.

“Please come to our shop,” Jungkook says, handing one of the last ones to a guy in a cloak. Most of the people he had passed them to merely glance at them without another thought, but this stranger stops and reads through it.

“Kim Seokjin?” he reads out loud, as if the name is familiar to him.

Jungkook pauses and looks at the mysterious stranger. The cloak covers most of his face and body, but he meets his eyes with a look of curiosity. With a tilt of his head, Jungkook asks, “You know my hyung?”

The stranger nods. “Hey kid. Do you happen to know a guy named Kim Namjoon?”

When Seokjin and the others return to the shop, they aren’t alone.

“Well, well,” a familiar voice says as he steps inside. He pulls down the hood of his cloak, revealing his handsome face. “I knew you’d be together, but I never thought I’d find you all here.”

“Jackson?!” Namjoon’s mouth drops, knocking over the chair he was sitting on as he rushes to greet his friend. The two clasps hands and pull each other into a quick hug.

Hoseok laughs in disbelief, welcoming him as well in a similar manner. “Hey, man! It’s good to see you!”

“Likewise,” Jackson replies with a big smile. He looks around the shop, in awe as he takes it in all. “So, this is where you guys have been hiding.”

The walls are painted bright, vivid colors. There’s a mix-mash of furniture, from old antiques and oddities to more modern pieces. The cozy entrance where you all stand divides the parlor and the tavern, and upstairs are the private rooms of the residents.

Perhaps to regular humans, it’s just a quirky shop. But for a mage like Jackson, he can feel the magical energy: the warmth of it on his fingertips, the whimsical lightness that eases his worries away, the safety from the protection spells cast in every room.

A kind of place that’s easy to overlook, yet brings in a strange sense of comfort that he hadn’t felt in quite some time.

“Like it?” you ask with a bright smile, shoulders rising with pride. “This is our home.”

“It’s incredible,” he tells you, thoroughly impressed. His voice softens as he adds, “I didn’t think I’d ever run into a place like this.”

“Who is he, babe?” Jimin asks you, curious of the newcomer. Taehyung and Jungkook share the same wonder, coming to stand next to you and Yoongi. All four of them are new faces to Jackson, even though he had already met Yoongi in his cat form.

“He’s a friend,” you explain as Jackson politely introduces himself to them. “We all went to the same school.”

Some time has passed since you’ve all escaped Blackstone Castle and found your place in this town. A lot of things have changed since you last saw Jackson as well. After that night, you haven’t seen or heard from any of the other mages.

Until now.

Jackson stands before you all, travel-worn and exhausted. His face is thinner and more sunken. Dark circles are beneath his tired eyes, as if he hadn’t properly slept in days. There’s a scar on his cheek that hadn’t been there before.

“We ran into him in town,” Seokjin informs, coming to greet you with a quick kiss. Jackson arches an eyebrow when he sees a former warden kiss a mage. “He said he needs to talk to Namjoon.”

“Me?” the man in question asks, surprised.

“That’s right. Although…” Jackson trails off as he turns his attention to you and Hoseok. “Maybe this is something you guys could help with too.”

You and Hoseok exchange glances with each other. Then, curiously, you ask, “What do you mean?”

But Jackson hesitates. His eyes flicker to the others, suggesting that the news he’s about to share must be spoken in private. That its details require the use of magic, and Jackson doesn’t know who among your group already knows the truth about you, Hoseok, and Namjoon.

“Have you eaten yet, Jackson?” Hoseok suddenly asks, easing into a bright smile. “Stay for a while. We have a lot to catch up on.”

It feels like old times.

Jackson and Namjoon share a drink. Their glasses clink together before they chug down the golden liquor.

Hoseok’s loud laughter is carried throughout the room, more amused by Yoongi’s reaction to Seokjin’s joke than the punchline itself. Despite that, Seokjin attempts to make another. His face burns red from the tips of his ears down to his neck as he desperately tries to refrain from laughing at his own joke. And when he fails at the delivery, he smacks Yoongi in the arm as if it’s his fault. Hoseok, somehow, laughs even harder.

Jimin pours another shot, cheeks flushed a rosy pink and barely able to see straight. The clear liquor misses the glass entirely and spills mostly on the table. Some of it drips to Jungkook’s pants, who barely registers it. Instead, his round eyes are locked on you, lovestruck as he watches you and Taehyung drunkenly slow dance together.

Taehyung spins you beneath his arm and catches you when you stumble forward. The both of you are clinging onto each other’s arms, in fits of giggles as he presses his forehead against yours. It’s like no one else is in the room except you two. Not even any of your other lovers, who seamlessly take turns drinking with you and passing you around from one to another throughout the night.

Seeing everyone around him relaxed and having fun reminds Namjoon of the parties back at Blackstone Castle. It isn’t unusual for apprentices to sneak away at night to hook up, drink with friends, and celebrate small achievements and occasions. With the wardens constantly watching them, the heavy burdens of exams and Harrowings on their shoulders, and a strict system followed by the staff to keep magic restricted, it’s sometimes the only way the students could let loose.

Jackson was fond of going to these parties. He’d go to as many as he could, and made lots of friends with his outgoing and funny personality. Your old roommates were too, and they’d drag you along with the promise of Hoseok attending a party as well. And Namjoon – who’d patiently wait and catch your eye when you’re alone – would sneak you out before anyone would notice you’re both gone.

“I knew she’d end up with you or Hoseok,” Jackson comments, drawing Namjoon out of his thoughts. They watch as you end your dance with Taehyung with a curtsy before he guides you to Hoseok, who easily gathers you in his arms. “But it looks like she got both of you and more.”

“She’s our girl,” Namjoon agrees with a fond smile. 

Namjoon used to be a little jealous of Hoseok. After all, Hoseok loved you first. He still loves you now. 

But when you feel Namjoon’s gaze on you from across the room, you meet his eyes and smile. With the same sincerity you had back then, when you had first said those words to him during your birthday, you mouth the words, “I love you.”

It’s not words you often say to each other – even though you clearly do, and he loves you just the same – but it still takes his breath every time. You love him. Someone as precious and beautiful as you chooses to love a guy like him.

“Who would’ve thought?” Jackson muses, sipping on his drink.

It feels like old times, but things have changed. 

Namjoon certainly has. Without the vigilant gaze of the wardens and the suffocating confinements of the fortresses, he is a free man in this town. He can run along the river every morning, read books beneath the shade of a tree at the park, and go out with you and the other guys when the shop is closed. No one knows that he’s a mage here; no one looks at him like an abomination or something Wicked.

Here, he is just Namjoon. And as himself, he’s learned to enjoy his life a bit more. He’s learned to cherish those he holds so dearly, and savor those precious moments with gratitude. He’s learned to love, even when sometimes, he wonders if he deserves it.

For Jackson, however, his experiences after Blackstone are entirely different.

Since that night, he’s been on the run. He barely had time to grieve and process what had happened for a while, running before the nightmares caught up to him. He never stays in a town too long, never reveals too much about what he is or where he came from. In Blackstone, the threats were contained within the castle: power-hungry wardens, missued spells, Harrowings, and the nightmarish realm of the Veil. Out here, anything could happen. Anyone could become a potential threat.

“You’re always welcome to stay here, Jackson,” Namjoon offers after a few more drinks, just as Taehyung and Jungkook help carry a drunk Jimin upstairs into the spare bedroom. He grimaces, unable to take back what he said.

The eighth room doesn’t belong to Jackson anyway.

“I appreciate it, but it looks like you have a full house,” Jackson replies as he looks around the shop again. 

Everyone seemed to have passed their limit. Hoseok is zoning out, sitting quietly with a blank expression on his face. Yoongi was the opposite, cheering loudly and running around when he won a card game you were all playing, but now his energy has died down as he patiently waits for you to go to bed with him. Seokjin is sober enough to clean up, putting away the empty bottles and picking up the cards that were thrown on the floor. Neither Taehyung nor Jungkook have come back down after they took Jimin upstairs, so they must have fallen asleep as well. No one is paying attention to them.

Now is as good a time as any to reveal why he’s here.

“What’s that?” Namjoon asks, seeing Jackson pull out a couple fliers. One of them is one he received from Jungkook earlier that day. The other one has a bit more wear and tear, creases showing that it’s been folded and re-opened over and over.

“I think I might have a job you and your friends would be interested in,” he tells him, showing the flier that the Oathkeepers were passing out. “I ran into a couple mages you guys helped out a few towns over. It’s rare to run into others like us, let alone a group of mages and humans who are willing to help each other out. When they described you guys, I had a feeling I knew exactly who they were talking about. Turns out, I was right.”

Namjoon remembers them. Seokjin’s former guild wanted to bring in mages to the frontlines of their quests, but at the expense of abusive power and enslavement to control them. It was a controversial stance that eventually divided the guild and led to Seokjin and his friends separating from them altogether after all of you helped the captured mages escape.

“That’s why you were looking for me?” Namjoon asks, remembering Seokjin had mentioned that Jackson wanted to speak with him.

“I was looking for everybody. You. Hoseok. Your girl. My old roommates. Any of our old friends,” he lists with a frown. It doesn’t seem like he had much luck finding anyone else. Jackson then pushes the second paper – the worn and torn one – toward him. “While looking around, I found this.”

Without reading it, Namjoon asks, “What is it?”

“It’s the job,” Jackson reminds him, carefully watching as Namjoon picks it up and unfolds the paper.

“Help wanted,” Namjoon reads out loud. “Every night, the undead wakes from their eternal slumber and attacks our small village. No one knows why or where they are coming from, but our farmers suspect a necromancer is to blame.”

Necromancy?

Magic, as beautiful and wonderful as it could be, is also dangerous and deadly. Certain magic is forbidden for a reason. Messing with the afterlife is considered one of them.

“Keep going,” Jackson urges.

“Each night, our numbers dwindle as the undead grows. Soon, there will be nothing left of our village,” Namjoon continues with a frown. “In a desperate plea for help, we are sending our notices far and wide in hopes to find anyone brave enough to take this urgent quest. We will do whatever it takes to save our home. Please, to anyone who finds this, help us.”

Namjoon doesn’t get it. Dark magic is explicitly banned from the fortresses. It’s why they’ve been built and why they contain mages in the first place. Jackson knows this. He’s lived in these towers too.

“Check the location,” Jackson quietly presses before Namjoon could turn it down.

He does, glancing down at the paper again. He nearly drops it when he sees where the quest is coming from.

Hawthorn Village. His hometown.

He’s tried and failed several times to return to that place ever since he was sent away on the day of his magical awakening. Ignis died helping Namjoon on his last attempt to return, and Namjoon swore he would never try again after that haunting day.

Suddenly, it feels like it’s hard for him to breathe. To swallow. He blinks back the sting of tears as he looks at his friend. “That place…”

“We can come with you,” Seokjin suddenly offers, holding some empty bottles and glasses that he is taking to the sink. “The Oathkeepers and I. We have the documents that prove that we’re a legitimate guild.”

No one would question them on the road. Some would be more willing to help and provide information when they see they’re a group on a mission and not just ordinary travelers as well.

“What do you say?” Jackson asks, sounding hopeful. “I won’t be able to do this on my own. They’ll need us, Namjoon. We can help them. All of us can.”

And Namjoon realizes why Jackson mentioned you and Hoseok could help with this quest as well.

His gaze immediately turns to you.

Your arm is around Yoongi’s neck as he helps you stand. You look flushed, cheeks hot and limbs loose from the alcohol. A bashful giggle escapes your lips at your own predicament, and how you feel like a fawn learning to walk as you use Yoongi to keep your balance. And you only laugh harder when you catch a glimpse of Hoseok’s face as he blinks slowly at you, and his mouth lifts into a slight chuckle of his own.

After everything you’ve all been through at Blackstone Castle, Namjoon swore he’d do whatever it takes to protect you.

“She’ll get hurt,” Namjoon points out.

“She’s the best spellcaster we know,” Jackson counters. “And Hoseok makes the best potions. You all have familiars too, and a formidable guild that will have our backs if anyone questions what we are.”

“He has a point, Namjoon,” Seokjin agrees, but in a way that lets Namjoon know that it’s his call. Whatever he decides, Seokjin will support him.

“Jin, last time I… Last time…”

“It’ll be different this time,” he assures him with a small but confident smile. “You’ll have us.”

“What do you say, Namjoon?” Jackson asks, pouring both of them another glass.

Namjoon lets out a shaky breath. He looks over at you again: your pretty smile and the way it reaches your eyes, how the sound of your laughter reminds Namjoon of how precious you are to him, and the endeared look from those around you as how affectionate you are when you’re tipsy.

It feels like old times, as Namjoon admires you from afar.

He knows you. Even if he had no connection to the village, you’d still want to help. Because that’s the kind of person you are. Namjoon is the same way.

But things have changed. Namjoon has changed.

Before, he would stop at nothing to return to his village and see his parents again. Before, he would take on this mission in a heartbeat, no matter what the risks are. But now, doubt starts to fill his mind.

This could be dangerous. Impossible, even.

But this is his home. His family might still be there. He has to try. Right?

“Okay,” he decides as he takes the glass Jackson pours him. The sudden burden in his heart makes it harder to swallow this time.

Namjoon can’t sleep.

He lies back on his bed, staring up at the ceiling. His mind restlessly jumps back and forth between a few things.

First, his hometown. What will it be like, stepping into that place for the first time in years? How much has changed? Would anyone recognize him? Are his parents still there? Are they doing well?

Then, there’s the necromancer. He knows very little about necromancy, and he doubts that you and Hoseok know more than he does about it. Where did they come from? What is their goal? What do they want with his hometown? Would he and the others be able to face them? Or are they dealing with something far too dark and dangerous?

Then, of course, there’s you and the others. He knows you’ve braved dangers before: in your Harrowing, the night Blackstone Castle fell, and even recently when you’ve helped Seokjin against his former guild. He knows you and the others are perfectly capable and skilled individuals, and as a team, you’d be an unstoppable force.

But Namjoon still worries. His mind starts to think about the worst. What if something goes wrong? What if you get hurt? He’ll have no one to blame but himself. Maybe this is too risky. Maybe he should tell Jackson and Seokjin he’s changed his mind.

The door to his room slowly opens. “Joon?”

Startled, he shoots up and faces the door. His heart calms a bit when he sees that it’s you. “What is it, baby?”

You shut the door behind you.

It’s just you and Namjoon. Like old times.

“I just wanted to check on you,” you tell him, sobered up after drinking earlier. Even in your drunken stupor, you can tell something has been bothering him. Your voice is a gentle whisper, calm and comforting. It’s a stark difference to the whirlwind of thoughts storming in his head.

He reaches out to you as you step closer, until you’re right in front of him.

When he dreams of you, he always wakes up just when he has you in his grasp. Just when you’re his to hold. As your fingers delicately wrap around his, he’s almost afraid he’d wake up and you’d be gone again.

“I could be better,” he replies to you honestly. His gaze is still on your hand as his thumb brushes against the top of your knuckles. “I have a lot in my mind.”

“Wanna talk about it?” you ask, tilting your head.

He shakes his head. “Not tonight.”

“Is there anything I can do to help?”

He meant to ask you to stay. To let him hold you for tonight, and keep the fears of potentially losing you at bay as you fall asleep in his arms.

“I love you.”

The words that fall from his lips instead surprises both of you. He sees your eyes widen, the way you catch your breath, the uncertainty on your face, as if you aren’t sure if you heard him right.

But his hand tightens around yours, pulling you closer.

Namjoon loves you. Truly, he does. He sees you in his dreams all the time.

Everything he loves. Everything he’s afraid to lose.

You’re on his bed now, your eyes falling on his broad shoulders and his bare chest. There’s a look in your eyes that he’s become all too familiar with.

He doesn’t know who makes the first move, but suddenly, you’re all over each other. He kisses you with everything he’s got, meeting your lips and tongue with his, as if tonight could be his last time to hold you, to make you his. He grunts when he feels you gently tug on his bottom lip with your teeth. And you whimper when his hand yanks the white fabric of your nightdress, thumb brushing against your nipple.

The second you’re out of your torn clothes, his mouth latches onto your other breast, tongue flicking the hardened bud. “F-Fuck, Joon.”

“Are you going to be good for me, baby?”

Your breath hitches as his fingers slowly trail down your abdomen and slot between your legs. You close your eyes, rolling your hips slightly as his long fingers slip past your wet folds. “Yes, daddy.”

“Good girl,” Namjoon praises, his voice so deep and low, it makes you shiver. “Come here. Wanna taste you.”

You obey, following his lead as he lies back on the bed again and makes himself situated. He guides you over him, and you’re careful of your weight on him as he holds your waist and thighs and eats you out.

He feels your muscles tensing and your hips bucking as the pleasure builds. But he keeps a tight hold on you, preventing you from squirming away as he works you open with his tongue. Your grip tightens around the headboard and your other hand tugs on his hair as his thumb rubs against your clit. “J-Joon, I’m s-so—”

Even without your warning, he knows. He gets you there, drinking you in, reaping his spoils as you start to come down from your high.

But it isn’t over.

Once his grip around you loosens, you turn over. Namjoon props himself up slightly, watching what you’re doing and groaning when he feels your hands and mouth on his cock. His fingers easily tease your entrance before slipping into you again, stretching you out, feeling you clench around them, before he decides to pull your hips closer for another taste.

It starts to feel like a competition. Like you’re trying to get him off first before he makes you climax a second time.

But Namjoon knows your body well, and you feel his tongue and fingers prodding, teasing, and hitting your sweet spot mercilessly. Your muffled moans with your mouth against him are driving him insane, and he barely edges you out – your legs quivering slightly from the intense pleasure – before he shoots his release in your throat.

Namjoon catches his breath as you roll onto your back, breathing just as hard as he is. He sits up to look at you, his mouth and chest wet with your arousal, and as you peer up at him with lust-filled eyes, he thinks you’re the most beautiful thing in the world.

More than what he deserves.

He caresses your thigh and smiles gently. “Tired?”

You scoff, breathless, but stubborn. As if admitting that you are means defeat. “I’m just getting started.”

Namjoon chuckles and then grabs your leg, pulling you closer. He aligns himself to enter you, moving slowly so you could adjust to his size. Your back arches slightly, face contorting at the pressure as your nails dig into his arms. You feel so good to him, he could never get enough of you.

He leans over to kiss you once he’s fully inside of you. “That’s my girl.”

“I’ll always be your girl,” you tell him softly, kissing his cheek.

Namjoon laughs, almost bashful with the way his heart flutters at that moment. You smile back at him, wrapping your arm around his neck as he begins to move.

His lips are on your throat, hands squeezing your breast and hips, whispered curses and grunts against your skin. It feels like wildfire every time. Heated, passionate, all consuming, like every touch and kiss sears his skin. Like every little moan and whine he hears from you compels him to make that fire grow. Then, only in the afterglow, he realizes it’s not the embers and ashes that remain. It’s warmth that fills his chest when he’s around you. It’s light that makes his heart glow with love. And he wants nothing more but to bask in it.

When he dreams, it’s always of you. Seductive, enticing, and tempting. But nothing compares to the real thing. Not even close.

Namjoon’s fingers absently trace patterns along your bare back. Your labored breaths have calmed down, slowly and evenly. Your lashes touch the top of your cheeks as you rest your eyes, and your tongue darts briefly to wet your pretty lips. 

He can’t stop looking at you.

“You always do this,” you comment softly without opening your eyes.

His hand stills. “Do what?”

“You always watch over me,” you answer, opening one eye to peek at him. There’s a small, playful smile on our lips. “Even when we first started seeing each other, you always look at me so endearingly.”

Namjoon laughs, a bit embarrassed. He never thought you’d notice the tender, forlorn look on his face after spending a night together. “Stay with me tonight?”

“If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you’re falling in love with me, Kim Namjoon.”

He smiles at that, dimples appearing deep in his cheeks. “I already love you, baby.”

You snuggle a little closer to him, the teasing in your voice replaced with sincerity as you tell him, “I love you too.”

It isn’t often that you two say those words to each other, but it still makes him catch his breath every time you do. His arm wraps around you protectively as he kisses your hairline, and he sighs happily as you tuck yourself under his chin.

“I’m glad you’re here,” he murmurs quietly, closing his eyes. It feels nice to have you in his arms. It feels nice to have you so close. He feels like he can relax like this.

Then, you ask, “What did Jackson say to you?”

His eyes snap open, and he sees the concern on your face. You hold his gaze, curious, but also as if you’re not certain if you want to push for the answers.

“He showed me a quest, and asked if we can help him,” he explains, his grip tightening around you a little. “It’s in my hometown.”

You’re quiet as Namjoon tells you everything. From all the details pertaining to the mission to Jackson heavily implying he won’t be able to do it without you. If there really is a necromancer terrorizing the village, you have the best chance of stopping them. Your skill at spell-casting is unmatched compared to the others.

Part of him hopes you’d refuse it – that you’d realize the odds are against you with this type of Wicked magic, and how stupid and dangerous this could be.

But he knows you won’t.

You know that Namjoon couldn’t pass up on it. This mission is too important to him. He could lose his parents and his hometown for good.

And Namjoon knows, if nothing else, you’d want to do it for him. You’d do anything for him. He’d do the same for you.

When he’s done, he feels you wrap your arms around him in a gentle embrace. “It’s okay, Namjoon. I know you want to help. I’ll do my best to keep your village safe, too.”

Namjoon frowns. His heart doesn’t feel any lighter as he holds you close. He feels so vulnerable as he softly confesses, “I’m afraid to lose you.”

“Lucky for you, I’m not an easy person to take down,” you quip confidently. You push yourself up to look at him, and your hand cups his face. Your thumb gently wipes away the frown on his lips. “I can handle myself, Joon. You know I can.”

Namjoon wants to believe you. But his heart still feels heavy with worry.

The next morning, Namjoon gathers the residents of the shop and tells them the news. As expected, there’s a mixed reaction.

“A necromancer?” Yoongi repeats, eyebrows shooting up in surprise.

“Sounds fun!” Taehyung exclaims, eyes brightening with the promise of adventure.

“Sounds dangerous,” Hoseok corrects with a frown and crosses his arms. “We don’t really know anything about dark magic or necromancy. How would we know what we’re truly up against?”

“We won’t know until we try,” you reason, glancing over at Namjoon. “As far as we know, there’s only one necromancer, and there are several of us. The people in that village need our help, and we might be their last hope.”

“If we’re not already too late,” Hoseok grimly states.

Taehyung suddenly stands. “What are we waiting for? We need to start packing now!”

“Taehyung, calm down. We should think this through first,” Yoongi points out, but the raven familiar is already taking flight. He transforms into a raven and goes straight to his loft above the library nook.

“I’ll need to start brewing some potions and antidotes,” Hoseok mutters, also standing and walking straight to the kitchen. Over his shoulder, he asks, “Do you think we can stop by the market for ingredients?”

“Can we get snacks too?” Jungkook timidly asks.

You laugh and rub his back. “We can’t have you hungry on our trip.”

“I’ll talk to the others and tell them about the quest.” Seokjin informs, heading upstairs to change out of his pajamas.

“Then, I’ll wake up Jimin. He’s still sleeping in the spare room,” you tell the ones left in the parlor. You glance over at Yoongi, who is already standing up to follow you. “Wanna help me bother him, Yoongi?”

He nods his head, a twitch of a smile on the corner of his lip, as he walks with you up the stairs.

That just leaves Namjoon and Jungkook. The mage sighs and runs his hand through his hair. Everyone took the news better than he thought.

Your party will consist of Jackson, the Oathkeepers, and the shop’s residents. There’s safety in numbers when traveling in such a large group. All of you are diligently preparing to face whatever dangers the roads and this necromancer can throw at you. And Namjoon is certain that you’ll all look out for each other, as you always do.

The only glaring thing is the necromancer. Hoseok is right when he said none of you know what you’re going to be up against. And that makes Namjoon nervous.

“Where are you going?” Jungkook asks when he sees Namjoon start to head to the other side of the parlor.

“I’m going to see if the library will have anything about necromancy,” he answers, though he doubts he’ll find anything useful. Even his magical nook of books might not hold what he’s seeking for. “We’ve never had to deal with this kind of magic before. I want us to be prepared.”

More importantly, he needs to know how he can protect you. It’s inevitable that you’ll have to face a powerful mage that controls the dead, but if he can find something – anything – to give you an upper-hand…

Jungkook is quiet for a long moment. His dark eyes stare at Namjoon in an almost penetrating gaze that starts to make him nervous. Then, quietly, he mentions, “You have to take their bells.”

“What?”

“They use bells to summon the dead and have them do their bidding,” he explains, just when he hears Hoseok calling for him in the kitchen. “Take their bells, and they can’t control the dead.”

With that said, he stands and heads to the kitchen, leaving Namjoon to stare after him. 

He knows that Jungkook was previously with a mage that specializes in dark magic. He also knows that Jungkook doesn't talk much about that part of his past, if at all.

But as Jungkook disappears from the parlor, Namjoon can’t help but wonder if he knows more about dark magic than he lets on.

At dawn, you and the other shop residents meet up with Jackson and the Oathkeepers. It’s a long way to Namjoon’s hometown in Hawthorn Village, and Jimin agreed to keep an eye on the shop until you return.

“I’m sorry I can’t go with you this time.” Jimin holds you and peppers kisses all over your face. He wishes he could, but he has his own duties tying him to New Haven this time. “Take care and come home soon, okay?”

“I’ll miss you,” you reply sincerely, wishing he could come as well. Due to the nature of this quest, however, you couldn’t tell him the real reason you’re leaving town.

Instead, you simply tell him that you’re all visiting Namjoon’s family, and that Seokjin and his friends are escorting you all there while they have a job nearby.

It’s not a complete lie, but it’s not the truth either.

Taehyung and Jungkook are excited about going on a real adventure this time. They both look eager to get started, rucksacks on their backs and anticipation in their eyes. It doesn’t matter to either of them what they’re facing, as going on a quest with their hyungs sounds more fun than anything.

Hoseok looks like he’s seconds away from a mental breakdown. He’s constantly checking and rechecking that you guys have everything you’ll need for this adventure. His wand is ready, tucked within reach. His rucksack is full of potions and ingredients. He checks with Yoongi to make sure they aren’t forgetting anything, and Yoongi shrugs and drawls that if it’s something they’ve forgotten, it probably wasn’t that important to bring along anyway.

Namjoon and Jackson stand apart from the others, seeming to be in a deep discussion about something. Since Jackson requested his help, Namjoon has been nervous about returning to Hawthorn Village, even if he tries not to show it. You often feel his worried gaze on you when he thinks you don’t notice.

Seokjin is with his friends, going over the map and figuring out the best routes to take. You see a side of Seokjin where he’s more serious than you’re used to, and perhaps on the surface, this is just another quest for him. But when you see him glance over at Namjoon, you know he’s in it for the same reason you all are.

You’re doing this for Namjoon.

Your heart feels conflicted when you catch Jimin staring at the others. It’s hard to keep things hidden from him – to keep him in the dark about everything – and you have a sinking feeling that he knows that you aren’t being completely honest with him. That you’re leaving him behind with purpose, and that you’re shutting him out from such an important part of yourself. 

Maybe he doesn’t even believe your half-truth about simply visiting Namjoon’s family.

You wish you could tell him. You wish you could confide about your own worries about the mission. You wish you could’ve told him stories about Blackstone Castle when you had introduced him to Jackson.

Jimin turns his attention to you, and his eyes lingers on your face, seeing past the neutral mask you’re trying to keep on. “Is everything okay?”

You wish you could tell him the truth about you.

“There’s something I should tell you, Jimin…”

At that moment, Namjoon calls out to you. He has your pack over his shoulder, and a sheepish smile on his face when he realizes he’s interrupting you and Jimin. “We need to get going.”

“What did you want to tell me?” Jimin asks, curious now.

There’s so much you want to say. One day, you’ll tell him about how you and the others aren’t ordinary humans, that the building you all live in isn’t an ordinary shop.

But that day isn’t today.

“I’ll tell you when I come back,” you decide, touching his cheek. You kiss his lips and murmur, “I love you.”

A small, sad smile tugs on his lips before he kisses you again. “I’ll miss you.”

Reluctantly, you part ways with him and join the others. There is a lot of ground to cover between New Haven and Hawthorn Village, and each passing night will just make things harder for the surviving villagers.

“Ready to go?” Seokjin asks, looking at everyone. A unanimous sound of agreement is answered back. The party gathers into the horse-drawn wagons, and thus, the journey officially begins.

Your hand reaches for Yoongi’s – who automatically intertwines his fingers with yours – and you look over at Jimin one more time. He leans against a fence, watching as Yoongi helps you get onboard. When he sees you looking at him, he straightens up and mouths to come home soon before he waves goodbye.

“What were you and Jimin talking about?” Yoongi asks you, still holding your hand.

“I think I’m going to tell him about what I am,” you confess, a little nervous of what he might say. That he might convince you that this is a bad idea.

“You should,” Namjoon agrees, sitting on your other side. He rests his arm behind you, squeezing in so that everyone can fit. “It’s about time he knows about all of us, no?”

Yoongi glances at you with uncertainty, but mumbles, “If that’s what you want.”

A weight lifts off your shoulders as you smile. “Yeah, it’s been hard to keep things hidden from him all the time, you know?”

Namjoon nods and then, lowering his voice and leaning closer to you, he slowly asks, “Was it hard to keep us a secret? Back when we were at the castle?”

“A little,” you admit just as quietly. “Hoseok already knew. He said we were too obvious. My roommates were starting to get suspicious too, and I’m sure Jackson and our other friends would’ve figured out something was going on between us. I think it would’ve all come out eventually.”

“Would you have been mad if it did?”

“Not at all. It would’ve made things less confusing for me if we had been honest with each other from the start.”

In hindsight, neither of you had anything to hide. You both liked each other a lot, and even then, none of the guys were put off with the idea of sharing you. But magic comes with so much secrecy, it seemed natural to keep things hidden. To expect that your enamored feelings won’t be accepted because love is taboo for mages.

“I’m sorry,” he apologizes, frowning at the things he could’ve done differently.

“I’m not blaming you, Joon,” you assure him, using your free hand to touch his cheek. “What matters is where we are now. Not all the things we could’ve changed.”

His lips quirks into a small grin as he takes in your words. “You’re right.”

The two of you share a brief kiss as the horses continue to pull the wagon you’re all on. It’ll take you as far as the roads will lead, but there’s a shortcut through the forest that will cut your traveling in half. That route, however, will have to be on foot.

Conversations between the others overlap as the excitement of the journey is still high. But to your surprise, you see one person is quiet and lost in his thoughts.

Jackson doesn’t say a word during the whole ride.

Traveling down the familiar roads that lead to his hometown in Hawthorn Village brings Namjoon back to unpleasant memories.

He remembers the terror the night promises, as if it’s still fresh in his mind. The low, warning growl of predators and their glowing eyes in the shadows. The way his body shivers from the cold, and how his feet ache from walking. The exhaustion that tolls his small body, but he can’t afford to stop and rest or the wardens will catch up to him, as they always seem to do.

It felt like a hopeless task then. But Namjoon was stubborn. 

He wanted to return home no matter what.

And now, years later, he finally will.

Seokjin is right about how things are different this time. Now, he has all of you beside him, instead of having to trek these roads alone. And that makes Namjoon worry.

“Watch out,” Namjoon warns, pulling you away from a green plant growing along the trunk of a tree. “Those plants are poisonous.”

“He’s right,” Hoseok agrees, examining them a little closer. You would’ve had an awful, itchy rash if you had accidentally touched them. He rummages through his pack and happily adds, “Luckily, I have an ointment for this kind of thing!”

“Careful, baby,” Namjoon says with caution a little later on. He holds onto you as he helps you down a slippery slope. “You might fall.”

Nearby, Jungkook is giggling when he sees Seokjin slip on the mud, staining his clothes with the wet dirt.

“Yah, Jungkook!” Seokjin snaps as he grabs the younger male by the ankle and drags him into the mud with him.

All day, Namjoon has been overly protective of you. Whether it’s a branch of a tree that’s hanging too low and blocking your path, a hole on the ground that you could easily trip over, or a mama bear and her cubs just passing through, Namjoon is there to guard you. Even if it means hurting himself.

“Joon, you don’t need to be so worried about me,” you assure him, sitting him down on a log and examining the cut on his arm. It’s bleeding, but it doesn’t look too deep.

“I don’t want you to get hurt,” Namjoon answers, wincing as you apply a bit of healing magic on the wound. Warmth spreads from your fingertips as it starts to close.

“I’m not the one with the cut,” you counter, gesturing at his arm. Thankfully, it just looks like a scratch now.

Being on the road isn’t too bad. After getting dropped off at the starting point of the forest, the excited chatter between you and the others lasts a good while, making the morale stay up. You all take breaks when you need to, make sure food and water is passed around, and keep an eye out for bandits, wild animals, and other dangers like low branches, poisonous plants, and pit holes.

After a while, the conversations die down to a mutual, tired silence. Everyone’s paces slow down significantly, and the breaks become more and more frequent. Jungkook quietly mentions that he’s getting hungry – the small snacks between stops aren’t enough for a meal – and Namjoon is certain he isn’t the only one.

No one protests when Namjoon suggests making camp at a clearing he finds. There’s unanimous relief as everyone begins to pitch their tents, make a campfire, and gather resources and ingredients to make supper.

Which leads to you and Namjoon, sitting together as you check the wound he gave himself when trying to protect you. He sighs and thanks you for treating him, barely feeling the sting of pain anymore. Part of him expects you to leave, but you still sit with him, watching as some of the guys play rock-paper-scissors to decide the order of night shifts.

Although you don’t admit it, you’ve been worrying about Namjoon too.

“I’m sorry, baby. I know you can handle yourself. It’s just…” Namjoon begins, rubbing his neck. “After everything that happened in Blackstone, I’m afraid to lose you. To lose everything again. Even now, I’m worried that you guys are putting your lives in danger because of me.”

“We’re here because we want to be, Namjoon,” you tell him with a small smile. “If it was Seokjin’s hometown under attack, or Jungkook’s, or anyone else’s at the shop, I know you’d want to do all you can to help too.”

“You’re right,” he says with another sigh. Maybe he’s worrying over nothing.

Your smile widens as you nudge him. “Are you nervous about going home?”

He chuckles dryly. That, certainly, is an understatement.

“I don’t think I know what to expect anymore. It’s been so long…” He lets himself trail off as his gaze turns to everyone else in camp. Taehyung is demanding a rematch as Hoseok throws his fist in the air and shouts in victory. Their rowdiness catches the attention of the others, who grin a bit at them as they decide to do another round. “My parents might still be in Hawthorn. If we have the chance, I’d like to talk to them. Tell them I’m sorry for burning down our old house, and that I miss them.”

“You could,” you assure him, giving him a comforting smile. “I don’t think the others would mind since we’re already there.”

He smiles a bit at that. Then, his heart flutters nervously as he proposes, “Would you come with me? When I go see them, I mean.”

You look a bit surprised. “I could if you want me to.”

“I do,” he quickly replies, a bit flustered. “It would be easier, I think. If you’re by my side at the time.”

“Then, of course I will.”

His smile widens and relief lifts from his shoulders, grateful you’ll accompany him. “Do you think they’ll forgive me? After all these years? It wouldn’t be too weird if I just showed up, would it? What would I even say to them?”

You laugh, and the sound makes his heart stutter. “I can’t imagine why they wouldn’t love you, Kim Namjoon.”

“Thank you,” he tells you softly, dimples popping at the shy grin. “For everything.”

Suddenly, the guys shout in disbelief and burst into laughter at the results of their game. You and Namjoon smile fondly at them. 

“I don’t remember where I was born,” you confide to Namjoon. “I don’t know who my parents are, or if I have family that knows about me. So, when Blackstone fell, I felt like I lost the only place I knew was home as well.”

“Oh…” Namjoon frowns. He never considered any of the fortresses a home. It always felt more like a prison. But perhaps, to mages like you and Hoseok, who’ve been locked away in those towers all your lives, it’s different.

“But you know,” you continue. “I can’t say I’d ever want to go back to it. If we hadn’t run away – if we hadn’t made it to the shop – we wouldn’t have met Jimin, Taehyung, and Jungkook. Seokjin wouldn’t be happy as a warden. And I might’ve never even had the courage to tell you and Hoseok that I love you.”

“Really?”

“Blackstone was my home. It was the only world I’ve ever known,” you say, your eyes still fixed on the others before you. “But I don’t ever regret leaving that place behind to be where I am now. With you and the others.”

In his dreams, Namjoon sees you again.

Your hand is in his, leading him away from camp while the others are asleep. Taking him to a secluded place in the woods.

It’s just you and him. Like old times.

Your back is pressed against the trunk of a tree. A seductive smile touches your lips as you wrap your arm around his neck. You pull him in for a kiss, and his hands glide up your body in a lustful hunger. He hears you panting as his hand slips between your legs, your lip biting back a needy moan, and your flirty eyes glancing up at him beneath your lashes.

His trousers fall down to his ankles, and he lifts one of your legs. You lean against the side of the tree, shifting your weight against the trunk, and look over your shoulder at him with a tiny nod.

A whistle of an arrow flies toward him, but it hits you. Right in the heart.

The flirty gaze turns to a look of horror and accusation. This is his fault.

You slump on the ground, cold and unmoving. Hunters gather around, pointing their weapons at him. Wearing similar faces of anger, disgust, and terror like the villagers from his hometown the night of his awakening.

Among them are the rest of the guys: Seokjin, Yoongi, Hoseok, Taehyung, Jungkook, and even Jimin. There’s disappointment and sadness in their eyes when they see your body. It turns to looks of hatred and distrust when they look at Namjoon.

It’s his fault you got hurt. It’s his fault things ended up like this.

Everything is his fault.

Namjoon feels so small again, like he’s a kid. Everyone gathers around him, wanting an explanation. Why is he born with magic? What wickedness has he done to be cursed with that power?

Your eyes are lifeless. Your skin is cold.

But with a distant twinkle of a bell, your head snaps toward him. Your jaw falls open too widely as an agonizing scream comes from your throat.

Namjoon wakes with a start.

Another dream about you, but this one is different. This one is a nightmare.

His heart races when he finds himself somewhere he doesn’t recognize. And it takes him a moment to place himself in a tent he’s sharing with you and the others.

Seokjin is at the far end, lying on his back with his face turned toward you. One arm is curled out beside him as his other hand rests on his stomach where Yoongi, in his cat form, has chosen to sleep. Hoseok has his arms wrapped around you and is curled up against your back. Taehyung has stolen his pillow, using it as a nest, as he tucks his head beneath his black feathers. Namjoon doesn’t see Jungkook right away, but he hears his low, steady croaks by his head, settled on the opposite end.

All of you are sleeping safe and sound, huddled together like a pile of puppies.

Namjoon smiles fondly at the sight, relieved to see that you’re unharmed. But the nightmare is still too fresh in his mind. Quietly, he decides to sneak out and get some fresh air.

A couple of the Oathkeepers and Jackson are keeping watch this time. His old friend looks surprised to see him, but doesn’t send him away when Namjoon takes a seat next to him by the fire.

“Aren’t you tired?” Jackson asks.

“I’ll go back in a bit,” he promises, frowning up at the sky. The night feels too long. Dawn doesn’t seem like it’ll break through soon.

For a while, the two sit together quietly by the campfire, lost in their own thoughts. Suddenly, Jackson asks, “Do you still think about that night? At Blackstone?”

The night of the rebellion. When Adriel summoned something Wicked from the depths of the Veil and made a contract with it. Power in exchange for his physical form.

“It’s not really Blackstone I think about,” Namjoon admits. The burdens he carries are longer and heavier than what happened the night you all escaped.

“I think about it all the time. Everything that went wrong. Everything that I could’ve done differently,” he sighs as he stares at the burning fire before him. “Adriel was my friend. I should’ve stopped him. I should’ve realized what he was doing was wrong.”

“Adriel just wanted us to be free,” Namjoon reminds him. There isn’t anything wrong with wanting that.

“And look where that got us,” Jackson bitterly retorts. “Adriel is dead. Most of us have probably been recaptured and sent back to a fortress somewhere. The rest of us are on the run, hiding our magic so we don’t get caught.”

Namjoon frowns. Jackson has a point. Even outside the castle walls, freedom still has its limits. 

“None of us could’ve known what would’ve happened,” Namjoon reasons. “I don’t think Adriel even knew when he made contact with that Wicked.”

“But we could’ve done better!” Jackson snaps. There’s an anger in his eyes that Namjoon is all-too familiar with. A spiteful resentment that he, himself, has carried for years. “We were his friends. We could’ve checked up on him. We could’ve talked him out of doing something so goddamn dangerous. We could’ve saved him too.”

His voice shakes, eyes wild with accusation and guilt. You were all at the tower. You’ve all seen what Adriel had become. You’ve seen how Jackson desperately pleaded to his friend to recognize him, and how the Warden Commander ran a sword through Adriel when he did. It’s a scene that’s been haunting Jackson ever since he left the tower.

“Jackson…” he begins, but honestly, he isn’t sure what to say. Namjoon feels pity. He understands how Jackson feels. He’s been in his place, burdening shame and guilt over things he couldn’t control.

Namjoon is lucky to have you and the others to be there for him when the shadows of doubt and resentment become too much.

But Jackson… he doesn’t have anyone to rely on.

“What if that necromancer in Hawthorn is one of us?” Jackson asks, his gaze now steady at the fire again. “What if they’re someone from Blackstone? What if they’re just another Adriel that lost their way, and dipped into forbidden magic they’re no longer in control of?”

Namjoon hadn’t thought of that possibility. He always saw the necromancer as a vague, hooded figure in his mind. Someone that summons the dead and commands them to attack his hometown.

What if that person under the hood was a friend? An apprentice he had a class with? Someone he recognizes from the halls of Blackstone Castle?

“Then we stop them,” Namjoon answers, placing his hand on Jackson’s shoulder. “And we try to do better this time.”

“I hope we can, Namjoon. I can’t have another mage fall like Adriel did.”

Thank you for reading ♡ Comments & reblogs are greatly appreciated!

Previous | Series Masterlist | Next

#magic shop series #namjoon x you #namjoon x reader #bts namjoon x you #bts namjoon x reader #namjoon smut #bts fantasy au #bts magic au #bts witch au #bts fanfic #bts au #bts smut

[liebelesbe]

idk if visiting my old school was good or bad for my mental health :/

#what I definitely know was bad is that. #um. in 11th/12th grade everyone who has art class has to draw a very big painting. and usually you get to take it home like right before you #graduate #BUT. I graduated 2020. schools were closed. we didn't get our paintings. #and today me & my friend were brave enough to ask an art teacher if we could look for ours #and she said they don't throw the big ones away so it should still be there!! #AND WE LOOKED AT LITERALLY ALL OF THE ONES THAT WERE THERE AND OURS WEREN'T THERE #I JUST WANT MY FUCKING PAINTING 😭 #the worst thing was that another art teacher was like 'ummm it's been so long you should've just come earlier 🙄' #BITCH. WHEN. There were no fucking Schulfeste before this one bc of Covid!!!!!! #ok there was one last year but this year they auctioned some paintings off which reminded us #(& we looked at all the paintings of the auction and ours weren't there) #I don't even need the painting that badly but I can't remember what the painting I mimicked was called!! #I've been trying to find it for years but I can't fucking remember what it was called!!! I can't find it!! #doddie redet

[kaciidubs]

Hiii i’m new here so let me guide you through my chan brain rot so you can decide if this request is worth it or not☝️🤓

Ok so i’ve been thinking about bff Chan picking up fem swimmer!reader from late night practice and getting there a bit early so she’s still in the pool. He gets horny seeing her legs (i’m a simp for swimmers’ legs IM SO SOREY) and soaking wet and they fuck in the dressing room (just bc i think pool sex is too messy but this part is wtv for me).

Honestly i just think Chan is such a but/legs guy, i imagine him going insane between them and fucking the mc so hard to fulfill his horny and sentimental needs towards her.

- 🎃 (pumpkin anon if i may??)

Swim Practice

Oh lovely, I've got Chan brain rot 24/7 so let's get into it!!! And of course you can be pumpkin nonie! Sorry it took me so long! 💕

❣ Summary: Chris, your best friend who picks you up after late night swim practices. Chris, your best friend who might just have a thing for your legs. ❣  ❣ Word Count: 1.2k ❣ Warnings: Smut, fluff, slight humor, unprotected sex, slight public sex [locker room], slight leg kink [Chris], Reader knows how to swim, Reader is also kinda sassy, Chris being a slightly annoying best friend [lovingly] ❣  ❣ Female! Reader [No use of Y/N] | You/Your pronouns ❣  ❣ Additional Tags: Chan is referred to as Chanstopher, Channie, and Chris, Reader is referred to as Littlest Mermaid and Baby, Chris' dad is mentioned once ❣ Stray Kids Masterlist ❣ General Masterlist

Littlest Mermaid 🪸: Channie! You’re still free to pick me up after practice, yeah? Chanstopher🐺: Yeah, I’ve got you Chanstopher🐺: What time do you get out again? Littlest Mermaid 🪸: I’ve got the place booked till 10 Chanstopher🐺: Late practice again? Littlest Mermaid 🪸: Mhm- Mr. Bahng told me I could since all the little kiddos are in their summer lessons Littlest Mermaid 🪸: I owe you big time I swear!! Chanstopher🐺: Yeah yeah, I’ll see you later!

Chris checked the text chat one last time as he pulled open the door to the community center, checking the time at the top of the screen - 9:34 PM, sure he was a bit early, but there was no way you were actually using the whole reservation time.

You and Chris had been best friends since he accidentally pushed you into the pool during your beginner swim lessons, and when he tried to help you out, you’d used all your 9-year-old strength to pull him in instead - from then on, you both have been attached to the hip. Where he was taking swimming lessons to compete in the local swim meets, you were taking swimming lessons because it was either that or gymnastics, according to your parents.

Still, despite your differing reasons for being in the swim classes - proudly led by his parents - you two managed to turn an unfortunate meeting into a friendship that would stand the test of time; from supporting him in his swim meets to supporting him in award shows, you remained a constant in his life.

Of course, he did his best to reciprocate the same support through sending you a wall of text when he learned you’d be taking up swim meets casually in your own division, and staying up late to watch the recordings of said swim meets that his mom and sister sent on your behalf. 

It was only when he went home one time two years ago that the tradition of him picking you up from late practices began; one surprise pop-up turning into him being your designated ride for as long as he was in Australia.

Walking down the all-too-familiar halls, the smell of chlorine slowly seeped into the air before he reached the double doors of the pool room, various warnings and rule lists plastered across the front. He pushed through the doors, the sound of splashing water proving him wrong as he spotted your form floating in the shallow end - eyes closed and limbs splayed out like a starfish, most likely relaxing after a few laps.

Smirking to himself, Chris snuck toward the edge of the pool you were closest to before bending down, putting his hand in the slightly cold water, and splashing water in your direction - laughing as you slipped back into wading.

“What the actual-?!” Wiping your face free of the droplets - ironically making your face even wetter in the process - your fiery glare landed on a familiar face, “Christopher! What the hell was that for?!”

“You looked too peaceful,” he taunted, tongue peaking out of the side of his mouth before a cheeky grin brightened his features.

You rolled your eyes, dipping your hand in the water before flicking some water back in his direction, “Oh whatever - what’re you doing in here anyways? You usually wait outside.”

He shrugged, “I didn’t think you’d still be in the pool - figured I’d just come in and wait this time, haven’t been inside since last year, you know?”

Puffing your cheeks, you waded your way over to the edge before resting your arms on the tiles, “I guess.. Give me one final lap then we can head out, okay?”

“Knock yourself out - we’re still on for Hungry Jacks after, yeah?”

“Of course! There’s no way I’d pass up food after a practice - or food in general.”

With that, he watched as you shuffled your way through the deep end before swimming toward the other half of the pool where they kept laned off for swim meets.

He had to admit, part of him missed competing and the rush of adrenaline when the buzzer went off and all he had to think about was ‘go’, but watching you set up for a lap made that bitterness just a bit sweeter - knowing that you were able to grow from a kid who claimed swimming like a frog was the best form, to earning a few medals in the breaststroke and butterfly stroke category.

The sound of splashing broke him from his reverie, his eyes locking onto your form as you broke into a breaststroke - simple, effective, a good choice to leave off with after hours of practicing with almost perfect technique.

By the time you had turned to finish out your lap, he was already walking toward the pool chair that had your towel draped over your bag, snatching the cloth in preparation for your grand exit.

Oh, how grand it was.

What he wouldn’t give to be the beads of water dripping down the curve of your hips and thighs, skin glistening under the fluorescent lights of the pool room as you pulled yourself out of the pool with hard-earned strength.

Now that you were up close, he could finally notice how your bathing suit was snugly hugging your shape, each bead of water acting like glitter to catch his eye effortlessly - well, almost effortlessly, as he thrusted the towel in your direction without a moment’s notice.

“Uh- Here!”

You took the towel gratefully, shooting him an earnest smile as you took the time to wipe down your arms and chest, “Thanks - just give me a second to rinse off and change, then we can head out.”

Chris meant to answer you, truly he did, but all thoughts of a reply fizzled out into nothing as his eyes began the exciting trail down your body once more - god, he never noticed how wonderfully shaped you were until now, especially your legs.

Curvy, sculpted, from your thighs to your calves, he could only imagine how strong they were - how they’d feel wrapped around his head.

He was a simple man, if he found someone attractive, it was because of a multitude of things, but those legs - your legs, were making him feel like he was a teenager going through puberty again.

“Channie?”

His eyes snapped up to yours, immediately clocking the sparkle of humor mixing with something unfamiliar - it made his stomach flip.

“I could use some help getting out of my bathing suit, if you don’t mind?”

Of course, as a great best friend, who was he to deny you help when you asked?

He could only assume that he was an even greater best friend from the way you were quivering underneath him, your hands holding onto the edge of the towel-covered bench for stability as he fucked you into next week.

“Fuck, look at you,” he groaned, one hand keeping your right leg pressed against his chest while the other gripped your hip, bathing suit laid in a wet heap somewhere along with his sweats and underwear. “You’ve got no clue how many times I’ve dreamt of this.”

Your cunt clenched around him, a shuddering moan falling from your lips as you nodded, “S-Same- fuck, wanted you so bad, Chris- E-Every time you visit.”

“You-” An incredulous scoff escaped him, lips pulling into a cocky smirk, “You waited until now to make a move? Baby, I could’ve been fucking this sweet pussy ages ago?”

You wanted to reply, maybe offer him an apology of some sorts, but his thrusts didn’t let up and the sight of him ducking his head down to press a fleeting kiss to your ankle made your brain evaporate.“It’s fine - we can make up for lost time, yeah?” Dropping his hand to the back of your knee, he pushed your leg up to your torso, mirroring the act with his other hand and your other leg, “After here, after Hungry Jacks, I’m spending the rest of the night with you, between these gorgeous legs of yours.”

#✧. ┊ kacii answers #✧. ┊ 🎃 nonie #skz smut #stray kids smut #bang chan smut #bang chan x reader #bangchan x reader #bangchan smut

[oneforthemunny]

i'm not entirely sure what prompted this. to be utterly honest, the holidays are rough sometimes, and i've been kind of struggling so here's this bc this is how i cope now :)

tw: mentions of loss, grief, depression.

“...at the tone, please record your message.” 

Beep.

“Uh, hey. It’s-It’s Eddie. I, uh, I was just calling to, uh- I was just wanting to check on ya. I haven’t heard from you in a couple of days, sweetheart, and I know you’ve been busy. I just… Yeah, gimme a call back when you can, alright? I still got those VHS’s. Rentals not due for a couple of days. I’d-I’d really like to see you. Just… call me back when you get this. Even if it’s late. Love you.” 

The lights on your tree started to blur, water-stained with blinding, swirling tears of guilt. Settled on your couch, in the same crumpled position that you fell into as soon as you got off work, waves of exhaustion consuming you, but sleep never came easily. 

The most wonderful time of the year was a stretch, a mockery of a term that felt poisoned and back handed. With every happy, glowy commercial, all smiling families and sing-songy laugh; it made you feel sick at the falseness of it all. 

It had been four days since you last spoke to Eddie, nearing two weeks since you saw him in person. Not out of spite, or a fight like it had been in the past. This time, it was you- all you. 

The message on the receiver played on a loop, you jammed your finger on the button, letting it sound off its automated message before his voice filled the silent space in the room. You missed the sound of his voice, the warmth behind it so comforting in this frigid winter. It might be better to call him, actually hear him and talk to him, but every time you reached for the phone, you couldn’t dial his number. That would mean you’d have to talk, have to say something, tell him why you’d been so MIA, and that required a strength you didn’t have yet. 

Somewhere between the late night talk show coming on, but not before your neighbor’s lights turned off, there was a knock at your door. You figured it was your neighbor across from you, Mrs. Jennings, always bringing you baked treats in festive sweaters, leaving with a hearty “Merry Christmas!” that always had you crumbling inside. 

“Baby?” Your body stilled, breath caught in your lungs at the sound, like he might be able to see you through the door. 

“Hey, I-I know you’re in there.” Eddie’s voice was soft, muffled by the heavy wood of your door. “Not to sound like a total fuckin’ stalker or anything. I just… I wanna make sure you’re ok?” 

Your mind screamed at you to move, to go answer the door, to reply, to do anything. 

The lock jiggled, a squeak and a creak before the door was opening softly- hesitantly, like he was scared of what he might find on the other side. “Babe?” Eddie’s eyes scanned the small kitchen area, your purse slung on the table, shoes kicked off by the door into a pile. 

“You alright? I-I called you a coupla times, actually, and I just wanted to make sure you were ok.” His voice was tight, heavy soled steps on the carpet. 

You knew he saw you by the way he stopped. Halted behind the couch, hovering over a collapsed you on the couch. Tear stained sweatshirt sleeves under your head, an array of photo albums you always kept tucked in the top of the storage closet down the hall, memories sprawled out on the coffee table, creased on the edges from your shaky grasp. 

The one closest to you had his stomach dropping. He’d seen her before, the solemn looks and shaky breaths that you and your family gave when you’d pass the outdated family portrait in your home. Plastered on the wall with matching bright smiles, but looming with a haunting, sickening feeling. Eddie knew the feeling, a little too well. 

“Oh.” Eddie breathed before he could help himself. 

You wanted to sob, felt the burn of it in your throat, curling into yourself. 

“No, no, no, I-I didn’t-” Eddie’s eyes darted frantically, reaching out towards you, but never touching you. He knew what this felt like, knew the embarrassment and vulnerability, the shame and dread. 

He knew what it felt like. 

Silently, he sank next to you on the couch, careful of the delicate photos, placing them out of the way with a gentleness that had you sniffling, swallowing down a whimpering cry. A hand on your back, pulling your body into his, letting the weight of you settle onto his chest. 

Your face moved into the soft cotton of his tee. He’d smoked on the way over here, though it was comforting. Nose rubbing against his chest, clinging to the fabric next to you in a fisted clutch. Eddie’s arms around your frame, holding you firmly yet so softly at the same time. 

Your neighbor’s lights were off by the time you finally spoke. 

“I was in line at Melvald’s getting wrapping paper,” You croaked, voice raspy with emotions, cheek still pressed to Eddie’s chest. You could hear his heartbeat. “And they started playing this song. The Christmas one by The Partridge Family?” 

Eddie nodded slowly, hand still gliding soothingly up and down your spine. He could feel your shaky breath through his fingertips. “She, uh,” You swallowed around the words. “She used to love that song. Would always sing it when we’d put the trimmings on the tree. My mom would have that hanging tinsel you know?” 

“Yeah.” 

“And,” Your tone fell at the thought, at the mention of her again. “She’d always play this song on a loop. Would throw it around, all over the branches just to piss my mom off.” Your lips curled at the memory. You always laughed when she did that. Now you couldn’t because you knew she’d never do it again. 

There was a moment, a beat of silence in the still room. “Anyways, I…I was going to get wrapping paper because I’m so fucking behind on wrapping and-and buying, because I’ve been working-” 

“-You’ve been working a lot.” Eddie’s eyes cut down to you, carefully. 

You sighed, a shudder of a breath in. “Yeah. I know.” It was soft, an apology. You didn’t need to, but Eddie was glad to hear it. Selfishly, he was relieved that his fears that this was somehow his fault, that he’d done something to upset you, weren’t true. 

“I just… I don’t know. I guess I just wanted to be busy? I felt like if I stayed busy, I wouldn’t really get to think about it. Get this holiday over with and then I wouldn’t feel so…” You didn’t really know what to say, how to describe the feeling. 

“No, I… I get it.” Eddie nodded slowly, staring off in the colorful strands of lights glimmering from the tree in the far corner of the room. “My mom used to wear that, uh, that Pond's stuff to bed. The face stuff with the green lid?” You nodded slowly, cheek still smushed against his chest. 

“And right after she passed, I-I was in middle school, right? Seventh grade. And we had a sub and… fuck, she smelled just like that cream.” Eddie shook his head softly at the memory. “She just walked past me to make sure we were reading, and I smelled it and… I just ran out of the classroom because I didn’t want to cry in front of everyone. But, like, running out wasn’t much better.” 

You snorted softly, light enough to have Eddie’s gaze peering back down to you, heart skipping in his chest. “Yeah, I would say that might make it worse.” 

“Wasn’t very smooth.” Eddie nodded. “Just running out of the classroom seemed better than crying.” 

You paused for a moment, lips puckered in a pout. “It’s weird.” You muttered, still looking ahead. “How you’re just out and the smallest things just… send you over the edge.” 

“Yeah.” Eddie sighed. “Grief’s a weird thing.” 

“Really weird.” You mumbled. 

Eddie ducked his chin down, let his nose press into your scalp, breathing in your scent, pressing a kiss to your hair. “I’m here for you, you know?” He muttered, the vibrations from his words tickling your scalp. “For when it gets weird. You don’t… this sounds really fuckin’ cheesy and I’m sorry, but you don’t have to do it by yourself. Don’t have to be alone.” 

You weren’t sure what to say. Not sure you could even speak if you did know what to say, the growing lump in your throat strangling you. Instead, you clung tighter to his shirt, pressed yourself further into the warm, inviting hold that felt familiar and calming. 

Eddie would go and get the wrapping paper for you tomorrow, even help you wrap a few gifts. He’d help you carefully put up the photos with a gentleness that would have your heart fluttering. But for now, he held you, fingers moving down your spine, chin pressed to the top of your head, pulling you closer to him on the tiny couch.

#oneforthemunny #munnytalks #eddie munson #eddie x fem!reader #eddie stranger things #eddie my love <3 #eddie x reader #eddie munson x you #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson x fem!reader angst #eddie munson x reader angst #eddie munson angst #stranger things 4 #stranger things #eddie munson fic #oneforthemunny blurbs #eddie munson blurb #munny’s merriest #munny's merriest #eddie munson fanfic #eddie munson christmas #eddie munson x female reader #eddie munson x fem!reader

[meshlasolus]

Your Beauty Never Ever Scared Me

Dbf!Joel Miller x College!Reader

A/n: Listen… I don’t have any excuse for ditching my other three active series except for tiktok made me do it… That, and the CLM series by @macfrog has ascended me to a new level of crazy and I just needed an outlet for it somewhere. Another shoutout to @theatrelove3000 who keeps putting up with my dbf joel shenanigans, they are indeed insane.

Warnings: girl this whole concept should be a warning but anyways… age gap, some fluff, light smut, uncomfortable situations with readers father… probably some editing mistakes bc ya girl is tired ok its 2am

Please be kind to this chapter, I actually like it, despite the horrors.

Decided on the song ‘Mary On A Cross‘ by Ghost for this one bc it fits ig.

MASTERLIST

Age gap is approximately 15 years or so, reader is over 21 and joel is about 37

"I think I'd probably only slow'ya down," you chuckled, looking to Sarah who seemed to read the displeasure off your face from your dad's offer. "I'm studyin' to be an archeologist, dad. I don't know nothin' about framin' and all that house buildin'..."

Maybe it had been your dad's idea, but he wasn't the one who planted it into his own head. Joel subtly turned to you and cooly uttered a response.

"You could work on interior stuff with me."

It had been almost three days.

You looked out the window to the front of your house repeatedly to try and remember it clearly. The drive home, the kiss, and how abruptly it ended with a promise to see each other around. You thought about it so often you almost wondered if it happened the way you perceived it, if any details had been skewed in your mind simply because you wanted to keep it there, fresh, untouched. Maybe he thought of it differently... but maybe he didn't.

"Did you bring home the stuff I asked ya?" Your dad came into the kitchen with a smile, embracing you with a side hug and turning to help you unpack the groceries.

"Course' I did, Pa," you handed him the bag with the six-pack of bud and the other one full of snacks.

It was the first Rangers game night, and as per tradition, that meant the company of the next-door neighbors. It had been a while since you'd been around to enjoy it, but now that you were back, there were quite a few more reasons why you were on edge to now participate. It would look weird if you came up with an excuse not to be there, and you knew that. You also knrw that you'd gotten into a rather complicated entanglement with your father's closest friend, and weren't sure what the outcome really was.

Had that driveway light not spooked you both apart, and had that little black stray cat not made an appearance, how far would it have gone? Things were pretty heated, but even still. Would he have said something? Maybe along the lines of 'I've known you since you were sixteen, and this isn't appropriate at all.'

You didn't have time to think about it, you were set to work on helping your dad cook dinner for the soon-arriving neighbors. Dinner and a baseball game, once a relaxing and enjoyable time to bond with your dad, now turned into an anxiety fest where you were convinced you'd have to walk on pins and needles around every topic.

"So," your dad piped up from his silence at the stove, stirring the pot of chili he'd been prepping. "Joel told me he gave you a ride 'few nights back."

You knew it was harmless, and that he wasn't asking for any reason, other than that he was probably curious. You hadn't seen Joel in a while, not since two Christmases ago. Your dad had driven up to Dallas to spend both Thanksgiving and Christmas with you last year, and you didn't come home for summer break given an internship opportunity. You must have seemed different to the man in some way. All grown up.

"Yeah, gave me a ride n' saved me at the bar," you chuckled, trying to seem playful and unsuspicious about the encounter.

He seemed to be confused, his brows furrowed and a funny look on his face.

"Whad'ya mean he saved ya?" he of course was continuing to speak all the while dumping his favorite spices into the pot of chili, looking across here and now to keep engaged.

"Just scared off some weirdo who couldn't take no for an answer," you let a sweet and genuine smile fall across your features, but didn't let it get out of hand. Your relationship with your father was airtight, and he could read you pretty damn well. You weren't going to give anything away, not with what was potentially on the line.

"Glad he was there," he replied with a chuckle, sending you a soft glance. "Never thought you'd have grown up so fast, now I gotta carry a shotgun whenever we go places. Fend off the wild beasts."

His jokes were only so funny now, because in this situation, you knew he wouldn't hesitate to shoot Joel if he found out what had happened. All in the nature of protecting you, but it made you sad to think of the situation that way. Joel wasn't just another weirdo following you around at a bar.

"It's only because I'm so pretty," you did your best to respond lightheartedly, making a quip that would soothe the silence. "And I believe that's yours and Mama's fault, givin' me the genes and what not."

You'd finished chopping a nice garden salad by the time the doorbell rang. You ran upstairs to change your shirt to the Jersey your dad bought you for your birthday, claiming it was good luck for the team. Truth be told, you didn't wanna be downstairs when Joel and Sarah got here.

Sarah was here, too. Her, you could easily handle. You were almost hoping that she would be in a rather talkative mood, that way the attention could be swayed to her inconspicuously. You doubted Joel would even try to talk to you, anyway.

"Lovebug, come on down, Millers are here!" Your dad shouted up, even though he saw you run upstairs right when the doorbell rang to change your shirt.

"I'm comin', hold on," you replied sassily while heading for the staircase.

You got to the bottom and had to take a breath before turning the corner into the entryway. Joel stood there with a sweet smile to you, and you tried your best to hold back the one you wore. It was too bright, too happy to see him. All despite your nerves.

You were quickly embraced by Sarah, whom you paid immediate attention to.

"My lordy, girl," you held up your hand by your shoulder to show the height difference, "last time I saw you, you must've been this tall."

"Dad tells me I'm growing like a weed," she tossed a finger over her shoulder to where he was standing, and you gave him a small glance and a smile.

"Us daughters do have a tendency to grow up," you laughed, slinging an arm around Sarah and pulling her along to the kitchen as your dad and Joel did the same behind you.

Why had you been so anxious? Joel is happy to see you. He makes causal conversation with your dad, but he catches your eye every chance he gets. His expression doesn't change, except for the tug of his lips in a smile that's barely there. Joel doesn't smile too often, except apparently when you and Sarah are around.

It doesn't take long for everyone to get situated with their food at the table, playful banter between Joel and your father filling the air as you made less rambunctious chatter with Sarah.

She's doing pretty well since last you saw her. She was always a bright girl, but as she grew it became more apparent that she would probably excel further than anyone in her graduating class. You were sitting across from a future valedictorian, you were sure.

You'd tried to ask her about her out of school interests before your dad interrupted with a question.

"How about you, lovebug?" He watched your eyes flick over to him with a turn of your head. He added context, given you hadn't been listening to them earlier. "Are you gonna look for a summer job?"

You really should, if you're being honest. There's not much work in your aspiring profession located here, but you weren't as lucrative as you used to be, given your educational expenses.

"I've thought about it," you tilted your head back and forth, and your dad seemed to need more from your answer. "I need to earn some cash before I get back to Dallas, but I'm not really sure where to apply."

Sarah seemed to know where this was going before you did. She'd been around the last time your dad was begging Joel to find some help for the contracting team they worked with. But surely your dad doesn't expect you to build houses, does he? Your dream job is to dig holes in the ground, not fill them in and put homes on top.

"We got some spaces to fill, you should come work with us 'few months. The pay's good and you don't have to stay on long, probably just till the end of July."

You gave him a look, and he instantly knew you weren't interested, but you figured you'd try and justify your reasoning. It was an argument either way.

"I think I'd probably only slow'ya down," you chuckled, looking to Sarah who seemed to read the displeasure off your face from your dad's offer. "I'm studyin' to be an archeologist, dad. I don't know nothin' about framin' and all that house buildin'..."

Maybe it had been your dad's idea, but he wasn't the one who planted it into his own head. Joel subtly turned to you and cooly uttered a response.

"You could work on interior stuff with me."

Did he just-?

"S'not much more fun than what your dad's been doin,' but at least it's out of the sun, and easier to learn."

You were almost dumbfounded. Your dad offering you a job that potentially could give you heat stroke with your lack of experience seemed like the worst idea in the world... but working on interior projects? With Joel of all people? Well, that didn't sound so bad.

You didn't want your dad to catch on, of course. Being so protestant of his suggestion, but then falling right into it as soon as Joel was the one to offer would be a dead giveaway to some sort of favoritism to his best buddy. It simply wouldn't look right.

"What kinda interior stuff?"

He smirked. The motherfucker was smirking. He knew you'd changed your mind, but couldn't exactly just come out with it. He understood, but it was still slightly amusing to him.

"Flooring, cabinets, countertops... 's things like that," he explained, knowing you really didn't care what all it entailed. He was still happy to play along. "S'not as fun as archeology, but it pays alright."

You nodded, acting as though you were turning the thoughts over in your head.

"Well, if you're sure I won't mess it up, I'd be happy to try it out," was your final response. You figured it left some leeway in case your father became suspicious, but gave a good enough answer to end the conversation on.

"That's my girl," your dad clapped a hand on your shoulder in excitement. Truth be told he would very much enjoy your presence on a work site. "I'll go ahead and call Eddie in the morning, let 'im know I found someone to replace Charlie for interiors."

It was said more to Joel, you figured, because you didn't really know who either of those people were. He'd nodded to your dad, taking a sip of his beer and then looking back to you. You smiled sweetly, nobody catching it but the one it was meant for.

"Game's gonna start soon," Joel spoke aloud, drawing everyone's eye to the clock over the stove.

Sarah cleared her throat before jumping in on the conversation.

"About that," she looked to her dad with the same puppy dog eyes she used to use against you. He was just as poor at saying no to her when she pulled those bad boys out. "Sammy texted me to ask if it's okay to stay over at her place tonight?"

Joel sighed. He knew that no matter the attempts he made for her to like baseball, it wasn't her thing. It was summer vacation, and he had no reason to say no, so he didn't.

"Is she coming to pick you up?" He began, fishing his keys out of his pocket to drive her if need be. The girl lived five minutes away, he'd be back only a few minutes after the game started, but he didn't really want to leave.

"I can ask her," she pulled her phone back out of her jeans, opened her screen, and checked her messages.

"No need, I can take you," your voice rang out, standing from the table and taking your bowl to the sink. It was a genuine offer, but it was also to get out of the house and process what just happened with the job situation.

Joel was the first one to stand up with you.

"You don't have to-"

"It's fine," you cut him off, leaving no room for discussion. It was lucky he liked you, otherwise, Joel Miller might have put up quite the argument for such a small dilemma. As was his way, of course. He huffed, but accepted he had been overruled.

"Thanks, then." It was mumbled, but there was gratitude in it.

"We gotta hop over to ours real quick and grab my stuff," Sarah told you, waiting for you to return from the kitchen before beginning to head out through the front door. You'd grabbed your keys off where they hung on the wall before going behind her.

"I'll be back soon," you called over your shoulder into the house, and got a chirped 'alright' reply from your dad.

You walked out passed your driveway, seeing the light flicker on as you both went passed the censor on the ground.

"Y'know, I didn't think you'd have caved so fast on that job thing." She had piped up once you were almost to her porch. You found it only slightly funny that she chose the exact topic which had been swirling in your mind since it happened.

"Not sure I really wanna do it, but your dad made it sound better than every time my dad's talked about it, guess he just convinced me," you chuckled, playing it off in a way that she absolutely was about to use against you.

"That's another thing," she turned to you as she backed into the house through the door, only turning once she was inside. "Since when are you friends with my dad?"

She said it in a joking tone, but having known a few things she didn't about interactions that occurred between you and her father, you felt constricted to answer seriously. Probably with a lie if need be.

"I've always gotten along with your dad," you gave her a confused look, accompanied after by a playful smile.

She grabbed her backpack and opened it, checking to make sure she'd taken all the school stuff out before starting to shove things in, her charger, headphones, etc.

"Yeah but... you're just all young and cool and stuff," she shrugged, turning around to walk towards the staircase. "My dad is all old and boring and only talks about baseball."

"Thirty-seven isn't old, babe. My dad is two years from fifty, and I don't even think he's old, yet. Boring? Maybe..." you reasoned, hearing her laugh before she sprinted up the stairs, giving you time to think of some answers before she asked any more questions. Had she really caught onto you that fast? You didn't think you'd acted noticeably. If Sarah was able to see it, then maybe your dad did, too. You needed to be more careful, in that case.

Sarah returned a few minutes later, her backpack now stuffed and her pillow under her arm. You nodded out the door and headed back to your driveway to open the door for her, seeing as though her hands were full.

-

The drive after Sarah had been dropped off felt so much longer. Maybe it was just your thoughts, or maybe you consciously drove slower to avoid getting home too quickly. Your dad was waiting, but above that, Joel was there, too. Probably sitting back on the leather couch, relaxing with his feet kicked out on the floor. He usually leaned onto the armrest with his elbow, and held his face against the hand it supported. You'd noticed it years ago. He only ever spoke up when your dad did, usually in reply to him.

He was content simply watching the game in the presence of a friend. It was endearing.

When you pulled into the driveway, you had come up with an excuse to not remain downstairs for the duration of the game. It was too risky, and you weren't apparently as good with self-control as you'd thought you were.

You went inside and hung up your keys on the hook, immediately passing the living room on the way to the stairs.

"Hey, lovebug, you missed the top of the first," your dad called. He knew you liked baseball, so if you were to lie and say you didn't want to watch, he'd know something was up.

"Y'know, pa, I think I'm just gonna watch it upstairs, I forgot I still got some stuff to unpack," you peaked your head into the room to respond, and saw that Joel, just as you had pictured, was sitting in his most usual position on the couch, feet out on the floor, arm up with a hand holding the side of his face.

"Can't you do it later?" Your dad pleaded, but you knew, seeing as how your father occupied the recliner, you would have no where else to sit but on the floor or next to Joel. You didn't trust yourself with that.

"I could, but I might fall asleep if I wait too long."

He sighed, throwing an arm in your direction and shooing you away. He wasn't annoyed, but he'd admit he missed watching these games with you. It had been like a tradition, but if Sarah wasn't here either, he wasn't gonna make you stick around.

"Sure you don't wanna stick around? We could use your lucky jersey down here," Joel piped up, lifting his face from his hand and giving you a pair of soft eyes. That was exactly the reason you would not be staying. He didn't even realize how much he affected you, but you'd make sure he did at some point. Maybe you could just tease him a little.

"You're right, it would be a shame to take the lucky jersey with me."

You walked behind your dad's chair, out of his sight, and tauntingly stripped the jersey over your head, revealing the tight black tank top beneath it, just like that night at the bar. Joel's jaw clenched and his eyes turned darker, even under the bright light of the flatscreen in the living room. You never took your eyes away from his as you slung him the jersey.

"Hey pa, can I get you anything from the kitchen before I go upstairs?" You leaned over the back of his recliner, looking at him upside down. He chuckled and shook his head, trying to move your hair from obstructing his vision.

"We're all good, lovebug," he spoke in addition to his physical response, his laughter dying down as you stood back up. "Come on down if you change your mind."

"I'll probably be down later," you spewed a half-lie. You weren't sure if you would be or not, especially if Joel was still lurking in the living room.

You gave those brown eyes one last look before heading straight upstairs.

You grabbed your remote and flicked on the TV. It was already on the right channel, so you tossed the remote aside onto your bed and flopped back into it. You didn’t actually have anything left to unpack, but they would never have known.

Your phone buzzed beside you, and you lifted the screen to your face to see a text from an unsaved number:

Missin you down here…

You’d never put Joel in your contacts, because in highschool, your friends thought it was weird to even text or call him regularly, but you had his number for years, always just as a backup. You’d known it by heart, now, and nearly had it memorized back then, too, for the times you needed his help.

I’d come back if there was an open seat.

A bit sassy of a response, maybe, but you were hoping he’d understand the hidden meaning behind it… Although, Joel didn’t usually pick up on those things very easily.

Open seat right next to me

Yeah, that’s why I’m up here…

You huffed, realizing it wouldn’t be that easy. The three little dots indicating his next response was on the way slightly nerved you. Maybe he took the last text you sent the wrong way. You didn’t mean it to sound badly.

What’s that supposed to mean?

Means that I can’t keep my hands to myself.

You quickly rectified the situation, although you might have gone too far. He was taking far too long to answer, now. The little dots that before nerved you would now be your saving grace if it meant he would just fucking respond, already. You dropped the phone on your chest, raising up and down in a scattered rhythm while you wiped your hands over your face. Your phone vibrated over your shirt and you immediately opened it.

I can’t either. Stay up there.

You breathed out a sigh of relief. He was thinking the same things you were, and likely was under more stress for it, given he sat right across from your dad, responding to his comments about the game here and there. Your dad had no idea what was happening right under his nose.

Wasn’t thinking about leavin.

This little back and forth went on, the majority of the game, in fact. It was more-so about the plays then on, because you didn’t have anyone to talk to up here.

Joel thought it a bit funny, your dad would say something oddly specific about one of the players, and then you’d text him right after saying the exact same thing. You’d been a product of watching baseball with your old man for just about ever.

“I’m thinking about gettin’ some tickets over the summer for a game or two. They’re always cheaper in them group packages, you n’ Sarah should come along,” your dad was barely paying any attention to the words he spoke, but they came flowing out anyway, clear and cool. “Could be fun.”

Joel knew that there was only so much group interaction he could handle with you, and you with him. It stands to why you’re upstairs, an he’s down here, fist wrapped tightly around your lucky jersey. All out of your father’s sight, of course.

“It could be. Don’t think Sarah’s much for baseball anymore, though.”

He’d hoped that your dad would drop it. Halfway through his third beer, he hoped the man was a little more than tipsy, and maybe didn’t even mean the words he was saying.

“Doesn’t mean you can’t still tag along,” your dad was definitely still sober enough to keep it up, although the way he spoke became slower. Maybe he was getting sleepy.

“I’ll think about it.”

His response was followed by a hum, then a lull of silence that endured the rest of the game. He sat all the while and thought about his predicament a bit more.

He couldn’t stop thinking about you. It was insane… like you’d leeched yourself to the inner workings of his mind and he wouldn’t be able to pull you off without hurting himself, too. You were just upstairs, and had been texting him. You were within his vicinity, and yet… so unreachable.

He’d wished for you to be down here, or for him to be up there with you. Obviously, that wouldn’t go too well with the man sitting next to him, but he’d be asleep soon. If he could just touch you again, just kiss you one more time, maybe his cravings would be satisfied and he could go about his days… but what would happen if he kept feeling the addictive urge to do more? What if he was never satiated enough to quit you?

The game was called, and you’d texted him a small ‘victory’ at seeing the Rangers had won.

It was wrong, and the presence of his friend beside him was a constant reminder that you were his kid, and he would have a final say. Even though you were an adult, he understood this was completely taboo, and you should be off with guys your own age... but he’s made up his mind about the thoughts spinning in his head.

He didn’t respond, though. Your dad stood up out of his chair, his arms stretching outwards with a loud yawn as he took a few steps forwards, clapping his hand down on Joel’s shoulder.

“I hate to kick you out…” your father joked, a low and tired chuckle under his words.

“It’s alright, I got some stuff to sort out anyway.”

They started making their way towards the door when light but fast footsteps could be heard coming down the stairs.

Joel turned quickly, a smile on his lips and in his eyes when he saw you trying to catch your breath after sprinting down here.

“Leavin’ already?”

They both laughed heartily. As if Joel hadn’t been here almost three hours, most of which you spent upstairs. Your heart was beating far too fast for your liking, but there didn’t seem to be a way to stop it. Now that you were present again, in the room with him, you didn’t know what else to do.

“Your dad’s half asleep as it is, if I stay any longer I’ll send ‘im into hibernation,” Joel’s response made you giggle softly, although you withheld most of the laughter, because in all honestly, it wasn’t that funny, and you needed to learn to control yourself.

“He’ll be over next week, we’ll talk about gettin’ you into that job.”

You nodded, turning back to Joel as your dad opened the front door. What were you supposed to do? You couldn’t hug him, could you? That’s too much… maybe just wave, or maybe-

He held his hand out… for you to shake it. A hand-shake. Yeah, sure, fine.

You shook it, but he pulled you in half way, tapping your back once and then letting go.

He just bro hugged you. This man just-

He turned and did the same to your dad, giving you one last glimpse as he stepped out the door. Your dad closed it behind him and you were almost clean out of words to say. That had to have been the strangest interaction you’ve had.

“I’m beat, love-bug. I’m gonna head to bed,” he slung an arm around your neck and kissed the top of your head before turning and going down the hall to the stairs. “Don’t be up too late.”

“I won’t, just got a few things to do.”

You waited approximately ten more seconds before running to the garage door, going as quickly and as quietly as you could through to your front yard. Joel was still on his porch when you got out there, but was about to go inside.

You ran out to the sidewalk in font of his house and called out to him, all the while still barefoot.

“Hey Miller,” you crossed your arms, watching him turn around and lean in one direction. “Did you just bro-hug me? Or did I imagine that?”

He stepped closer to the edge of the porch, leaning against one of the wooden beams closest to him.

You slowly walked up to him, tilting your head to side as you observed his stance. he looked rather good. Hair tousled, body adorning a black t-shirt and some dark jeans. He was a sight, even in the dark light of the neighborhood.

“I reckon I oughta’ try again?”

"Seems like the fair thing to do."

“You’re takin’ your sweet time, baby,” he irked, grabbing gently under your elbow and pulling you up onto to porch once you were close enough.

You smiled to him, and wrapped your arms round his neck, over his broad shoulders. He pulled you close, tucking a head into your shoulder. The anxiousness you felt before fell apart, the rapid beating of your heart slowed, because you were comfortable. You felt immense peace in his arms like you’ve never felt before.

He backed away too soon, but still kept you relatively close to him.

“Was that better?”

“Yeah, I’d say so.”

There was a moment of silence, of contemplation, but it wasn’t stiff, and it wasn’t awkward. It was just there, a nice and pleasant quiet, and you standing still with Joel Miller on his porch.

“You wanna come inside a while?”

Sarah wasn’t home, and wouldn’t be till morning. Your dad was probably passed out in bed by now, leaving the opportunity completely open. You had nothing to lose, no risk to be had.

“Yeah, I think I will.”

He didn’t let you go, he just walked you both backwards until he was able to reach the door, reaching with one hand to open it before stepping slightly to the side to allow you entrance first.

“Ever the gentlemen,” you smiled, walking inside before he followed you in.

“Gotta make up for all that nonsense earlier,” he closed the door, taking your hand and walking to the kitchen. He pulled out a stool at his counter and let your hand fall to your side as he made his way to the fridge.

He pulled out two beers and uncapped them with the tool hanging on the side of his fridge. You think you remember your dad buying it for his birthday one year. You can remember sitting in this exact seat many times before, actually. Never alone, though. Never just you and Joel, and nobody else near.

He slid you one beer an you smiled at him in thanks, taking a sip.

“Last time you had one of these, I didn’t know if you liked it or not,” he gestured to his own bottle, drinking some and setting it down on the counter.

“I don’t know, I think it’s growing on me.”

He looked straight to you, leaning both hands on the edge of the counter. You leaned forward, mimicking his more stern face of features before he said anything else.

“I didn’t wanna say so with your dad around, but you look awful pretty tonight,” he spoke the compliment smoothly, but he had to drop his head after he said it. Seemed that giving you compliments alone in the night was something of a struggle for him, since he was blushing still even when he looked back to you.

“I seem to be feelin’ a lot prettier as of late whenever I’m around you. Think you’re just good for my self esteem,” you paused, leaning back onto the stool to take a drink of your beer. “That, or it's just nice to be complimented by a handsome guy like yourself.”

He didn’t seem to believe you. His scoff was loud and heard immediately after your compliment returned to him.

“You think I’m handsome?”

He’d always thought he was average. Maybe even slightly below. As he got older, that notion grew until he felt that maybe he was beyond trying for a woman on behalf of his looks. Perhaps there were women from time to time that would agree to a date, but there were none since Sarah’s mom who actually stuck around, not until you… but you were different as far as relationships go, because technically, you shouldn’t even be considering one with him.

“Absolutely, I do. Why wouldn’t I?” You were curious, because he was clearly attractive. Maybe you’d spent too much time around the more traditionally preferred young men in dallas, but something about Joel intrigued you that never did with anyone else. Maybe it was the forbidden aspect of what you two were doing, but before that, it was something else. He was rough and rugged, and good looking in a mature way that the boys your age couldn’t mimic if they tried. Those dark brown eyes with little crows feet at the edges every time he smiled were a dead give away to his age, but it was so appealing somehow.

“Don’t know. Guess I’m just old,” he spoke, trying to hide the insecurities that phrasing brought about. He was too old for you, he shouldn’t be sitting here with you you alone and calling you pretty, and yet…

“Maybe that’s a good thing. Too many boys my age are still very immature these days.” And it was very much true. Too young, too immature, and too stupid to see what’s in front of them and really appreciate it. Older men have a tendency to take care of the things they have, because they know that with time they can lose them.

“That so?”

“Mhm.”

“They don’t even realize what their missin’ out on, do they?”

You shook your head in reply. Nope. Not a single one of the younger guys you’ve dated has treated you with the care you know he could. He’s always treated you with care, before… why would that change now?

“They probably figure there’s a million girls linin’ up after me that they can take a shot at,” you raised your eyebrows and drank some more. Maybe it was just a thought of some past experiences, but this beer was tasting better and better to you.

“I pity them,” he said nonchalantly, without really thinking about it.

“Who, the girls? I mean, I kinda feel bad, but other times, I think we all know what we’re getting ourselves into n’ we just try to ignore the red flags.”

It was meant as a joke, but he was being genuinely serious.

“No, the guys. I pity ‘em.”

“Oh, do you?”

“I do,” he nodded, thinking of the right words to say. “They lost you, didn’t they? Biggest mistake of their lives and they didn’t even know. Pity ‘em just for that.”

You didn’t know what to say. You figured the wide smile you wore was doing a fine enough job, but he wasn’t looking like he had anything else to voice yet.

“You think I’m somethin’ special, Joel Miller?”

He set his bottle down on the counter and walked around it to stand right in front of your barstool. He took both your hands and pulled them to his chest, just holding them there and looking to you with the sweetest expression you’ve ever seen from him. He’s so different than what you remember in your earlier years. He used to be so stoic and serious. Sometimes even a little grumpy. Guess time changes things.

“I wouldn’t be gettin’ myself into sum’ this crazy if I thought anything else,” he mumbled it almost, but he definitely meant it. His words rang true in every aspect of the implications they made. This was crazy, it was very unlikely in the first place, but even still, it was happening. Neither of you backed down, neither of you said no.

“If it helps, I happen to think you’re pretty damn special, too.”

He didn’t respond, just leaned closer towards you, nudging his nose against yours, before letting your lips meet in a kiss. it washed rushed and hazy like the last time. It wasn’t forceful or fast or anything of that sort. It was gentle, and it was meaningful. All the years he’d known you, but never like this. You knew this attraction was new, but it was still real. You wondered how many women pined after him over the years, only for you to now gage his attention when clearly no one else did. The man’s been single since Sarah’s mom left, and otherwise, you didn’t know him to be much of a ‘dating around’ kinda guy. Standing here with him, now, you felt such excitement in knowing he’d pursue you, the off limits woman, over anyone else. It was a true victory, or at least you thought so, sitting on a stool in his kitchen while he kissed you softly, his thumbs going over the backs of your hands that still lingered in his.

When the kiss broke, you inhaled deeply, the scent of him so close to you, surrounding you. He was like a warm blanket you just pulled out of the dryer. He was comforting, and soft, and his skin was currently hot to the touch. You could only hope that you had something to do with that.

“Baby,” he breathed, hands letting go of yours and finding a new home at your waist. You left your hands on his chest, feeling his heart rate fluctuating. “Gotta know something before this goes any further…”

You hummed in response, still trying to even your breath intake. He backed away a few inches to be able to look you in the eyes correctly. He’d spent enough time with you in the past to know if you were telling the truth, and he was going to use it just this once to his advantage.

“What we’re doin’, you sure you’re okay with it?” He knew better than to jump into this without clarification. “Don’t want you feelin’ pressured if you’re not.”

“I want this,” you spoke softly, just loud enough that he could hear. “Promise.”

You had thought you’d been the instigator to this, if memory serves you correctly. Even still, you know now that whatever happens, he won’t take it somewhere you don’t want it to go. This show of good faith was something you could put trust in him over. He’s a good one, you always knew that.

And again his lips were on yours, differently this time. It was a bit more hasty and fervent like the first time, but there was still something different from then that you couldn’t quite decipher.

You absent-mindedly opened your legs and he instantly came between them, letting your bodies become flush with one another. His hands ran up and down your sides, every once and a while dipping to your hips and somewhere below on your thighs.

There was a heat between them that you didn’t realize was there until he came so close to touching it. He never actually did, though, and you were both endeared by and upset about it. He was the one making that heat spread, he can’t just leave it there… but he’s testing his limits, and you think it’s respectful that he is.

He doesn’t want to cross any lines… as if this entire entanglement has not already done that. This situation in every sense of the definition, has crossed the line. Him hugging you that tightly on his porch, him inviting you in after dark when it’s only you and him alone, having a beer with some very personal conversation, and now making out with you in his kitchen. They all crossed the line of what should happen between a man and his best friend’s daughter.

“Tell me to stop,” he mumbled against your mouth, almost as if reading your mind. His hand on your thigh drifted between your legs, just barely caressing the heated pool sitting there, waiting for him. It was still very reserved, and you had to buck against his hand for more friction, but at least it was something.

The taste of him somehow made it worse, the feeling growing inside you without an end in sight. The arousal was evident, but you weren’t sure he would be able to do anything about it, yet. You could tell it was weighing on his mind, what was okay for him to do, and what wasn’t. You would beg him if you had to, you just needed more.

He had an idea, one that could allow both of you to explore this dynamic easier, and one that could potentially keep him from overstepping like he was afraid to.

He removed his hands only for a minute, bringing yours up and over his shoulders before he settled his back down below your ass.

“Hold on,” he told you, lifting you from the seat and walking until he got to the living room. From there, he let the space guide him until the back of his knees hit the edge of the couch. He sat almost abruptly, and when you relaxed your weight onto him, you felt the stirring between his legs as well. You moaned into his mouth at the mere size and feeling of it, beginning to slowly grind down onto him. He encouraged your movements, and used his hands to guide your hips as you went, back and forth, getting into a rhythm.

“That’s it, baby,” he praised, tearing himself away for a moment to expel his breath from his lungs at the new feeling. Your head fell against his, and suddenly it was the movement of your lower half taking you over.

He let his hands move over your body a bit more freely, now, but still careful not to make any harsh movements, or grab in places he felt he shouldn’t linger too long. He knew you wanted this, but something inside him questioned how comfortable you really felt… that was until you started doing the same, roaming his body with your delicate touch, making him feel like the most important man in the world. You could have sworn you marked the exact moment he snapped, rolling his hips upwards into yours shamelessly. It was so deliciously addicting, the feeling of his body pleasing yours, and vice versa. His rough and sturdy hands, though still gentle, ravished any part of you available to him.

The air between you was hot and thick, and you could swear that by breathing it in, you were drawing even more arousal into your body.

The motions kept going until there was a quickening of pace brought on by you both simultaneously. You couldn’t mark a distinction of when it increased, you just knew that the speed you were going wasn’t where you started. All you could think of was that your spend was fast approaching, and you wondered if his was, too.

“Gettin’ close,” you murmured, barely able to get the words out for the moans that slipped passed your lips. “M’gonna…”

He heard you, and understood. Truth be told, he’d started getting hard since that moment on the porch, so this was just nothing but sweet relief to him. He kept on, trying to meet you at your finish.

“Let go , baby.”

You had no qualms about being told twice when it came to him. You gave it up easily, the muscles in your body contracting when you felt the wash of utter ease through every inch of you. He tensed beneath you, but relaxed with a groan of relief right after, and you could feel his length twitch in his jeans.

You just dry-humped Joel Miller on his couch. Like a horny teenager. What the fuck.

The dawn of realization was cut short by his hand softly coercing the back of your neck, bring your lips back for him to claim as he did earlier. Soft, and gentle, no rush, no heat. Just that feeling between you both that started this mess.… and it was indeed a mess.

“You wanna stay over?”

-

Tags (open):

@justanothersadperson93 @moonchild-warrior @hopplessilse @brittmd115 @michilandcof @untamedheart81 @just-someone-broken @joelalorian @xybil @yvonneeeee

If i tagged you wrong, or you want to be taken off at any time, just lmk!!

#joel miller x reader #joel miller smut #joel x reader #joel the last of us #dbf!joel miller x reader #dbf! joel miller #joel miller age gap #pedro pascal fluff #pedro pascal smut #pedro pascal x reader #pedro pascal

[laguezze]

PAC: Summer Predictions

it's almost June and I feel like summer tends to be an exciting time for a lot of people! In case you are wondering what are some things summer will bring to you here's a Mamma Mia! Themed PAC for ya.

Minors DNI as one of the piles is a little PG. Please don't. Listen to me. Don't interact!

Here are the piles!

Pile I

Pile II

Pile III

Pile IV

Ready? Let's go!

Pile I

Song channeled: Waterloo

"I was defeated you won the war." "Finally facing my Waterloo."

There's an energy of waiting and release. I'll explain. You've been waiting for something to happen, you've been making moves in the past and nothing came out of it. So now I'm sensing you're just defeated and decided to let go of it. You have learned you can live without this thing happening. And it's when you let go that it happens. Or for some of you, something better comes out of it.

Letting go is a powerful thing, it can bring new things, it gives you peace of mind. And although it's painful sometimes, the sense of release is better than anything else.

So basically, this summer I see you becoming more chill with others and with yourself. You're done waiting and expecting things from people and opportunities, you're done. So you're letting go, learning how to breathe and that will be rewarded.

Things I'm seeing could happen: meeting a promising connection, learning a new skill, getting a job offer, learning how to love yourself.

Hope it resonates! 💕

Pile II

Song channeled: Dancing Queen

"you are the dancing queen, young and sweet"

"you're a teaser you turn em on"

I'm seeing you wanna have fun this summer. I mean, you chose this dancing pile, so it makes sense.

And I'm not here to blow your fun away. But i am.

So you want to go out and meet new people, get into that hot girl summer mindset. Maybe you've had a boring year or your experiences with summer have always been dull and not special.

I'm seeing someone scrolling on social media, looking at all the fun things people are doing on vacation, wishing that was them.

Well, I'm here to tell you that may not be you. And that's ok.

You're not at that point yet and that's fine. You can't expect to go out and meet people in a place where you know everyone. And if you can't afford to leave that place then it's going to be very difficult doing that.

It's alright to have a chill moment at home, you don't need to be out and about everyday in order for your summer to be exciting. You can meet people other ways, and you can get to know the people you already know better. Deepen some existing connections. Your deep desire of getting everything new is putting you back. You need to appreciate the things in your life before you get new ones. Including people.

Things I'm seeing could happen: finding a good friend, shadow work, journaling, exploring and finding new places in your city, picnic dates, taking care of animals.

Hope it resonates! 💕

Pile III

Song I channeled: I've been waiting for you.

"You're something I'd been pleading for"

"And finally it seems to me, my lonely days are through"

Great energy here, pile 3. A lot of you have done the work and been introspective and learned how to love yourselves. I'm so proud of that. Some of you spent hours wondering why your FS wasn't here yet and used that to solve some issues within you. Some of you wondered why you didn't seem good enough for this new position, and you did the work and got where you needed to be.

Whatever this thing you wanted was, you've done the work in order to get it. So you will get it. This summer it seems like the universe is giving you a break and granting you a wish. I'm so happy for you guys!

Things I see could happen: meeting a soulmate, getting a new job, getting a pet, buying a new house, leaving home, traveling somewhere you were dreaming of.

Hope it resonates! 💕

Pile IV

Song I channeled: Our last summer

"Walk around the Seine, laughing in the rain"

"Memories that remain"

You guys will probably travel somewhere small, like a town no one has ever heard of. This might be home for some of you and you'll be going back after a while. I'm seeing this summer will be quite transformative. I'm seeing it will be peaceful and quiet, but that's exactly what you need. Although not uneventful. I'm seeing some drama might happen with old friends. But nothing major. Maybe you'll get a crush on someone or see your old crush again and remember.

This summer is full of nostalgia and old memories. You'll rethink a lot of your goals and values and discover yourself a little more.

Things I'm seeing could happen: meeting a new crush, making a song, fighting with friends, rekindling a romance, losing the v (iykyk), lots of firsts... (Iykyk), flower picking, reading, writing a novel.

If you're a minor reading this why would you do this to me, i told you to leave at the beginning like get off the internet and live your life.

Hope it resonates! 💕

The End

#tarot readings #free readings #tarot #tarot blog #free tarot reading #pick a card #tarot pick a card #tarot pick a pile #pick a pile #pick a gif #pick an image #pick a picture

[rat-cannibal]

i have no idea if you write for adam, but here i am

i am the ultimate angst asker, if you're okay with that

adam or lute(ilovewomenbumpersticker) x reader who does in the extermination without them knowing.

- FEED ME A BONE,

carcass

aaaa thank you so much for the request!! i am a fellow lover of women, so I will do Lute at a later date. i wasnt too sure about what you meant by 'does in'. i did give you a sad ending though, so hopefully that makes up for it!

how would adam or lute react to the reader finding out about the exterminations? Part 1

- Adam -

you and adam started dating before he started the exterminations

you're an amazing person - kind, sweet, innocent, everything an angel should be. and also everything Adam isn't.

adam is already so insecure about anything that has to do with hell bc lucifer stole his wives (cue pussy eating hand gesture)

so he doesn't even mention it when he starts thinking about the exterminations

you're suspicious, obviously, because he's going off on so many meetings and is becoming more distant

but you dont say anything because you love adam, and he would never lie to you.. would he?

when adam finally gets his extermination team approved, he's overjoyed

he comes home and immediately kisses the shit out of you

You whine as he pulls away from you, your lips swollen and your face flushed. You try to catch your breath. "Not that I'm complaining, but, uh, what exactly was that about?"

Adam grins widely, squeezing your hands. "What, am I not allowed to kiss my beautiful partner hello?" You sense a hint of deceit in his voice, but choose not to question him about it.

you and adam always sleep in the same bed at nights. you have practically since you started dating.

so when one night he doesn't come home, alarm bells immediately go off in your head

is he cheating on you? maybe he found someone else, someone better

no, you reason, surely he's just held up at work

your suspicions only intensify when he returns the following morning, hair tousled and clothing ruffled

he looks exhausted, like he didn't get any sleep. usually this would indicate a long day at work, but theres a smile on his face that paperwork could never cause

dread grows in your stomach

he greets you happily, like nothing's wrong, and you play along, not wanting to fight with your boyfriend about something that could very well have been a misunderstanding

next year, though, when he disappears again and comes back looking thoroughly satisfied, your suspicions are confirmed.

adam is cheating on you.

you're a very conflict-averse person, so these yearly meetings go on for nearly two decades (time works different in heaven ok just roll with it. 1 year = a month to them basically)

eventually, though, you come home from a hard day of work and Adam isn't there.

that pushes you over the edge. you pack a bag and store it in the closet before going back to your room.

you would look for an apartment in the morning. for now, you just want to sleep.

you wake up and join adam in the kitchen for breakfast. he looks like he always does after these meetings - ruffled, yet satisfied.

"Adam," you say simply, "we need to talk."

"Uh-oh," teases Adam, "am I in trouble?"

"Where were you last night?"

Adam swallows thickly. "What?"

You glare at him. "Where were you last night?"

"I was busy with a work thing - you know how it is, babe, they work me to the bone. It's ridiculous."

"Why do you look so happy, then, so fulfilled?" You sigh. "Look, Adam, I know you're cheating on me. I've known for years now. I guess I just hoped you'd have the balls to admit it."

adam tries to frantically explain that he's not cheating on you, that he's been leading a yearly extermination

he would never cheat on you, he loves you

you demand to know what an extermination is, and he tells you in more detail than you ever would have wanted

you listen in silence as he describes the joy he gets from killing demons - from killing human souls

you retrieve your bag and leave your shared apartment for good

adam begs you to stay, says he'll change, that he'll do anything

but you can't be with a murderer

#hazbin fanfic #hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel adam #adam x reader #gn reader #x reader #reader #reader insert #angst #heavy angst #sad ending #no happy ending

[tbhimnoteasyonmyself]

TAN IS NEW

Hello, fellow associates, I, local deranged man, bring you (by request of @ayansbff who said I should "go make a post and patent it fr." thank you, Naga <3) once again a theory as insane as whatever has been going on in the ASOIAF fandom in the last 10 years (but no, I'm not here to tell you Tan is a horse or New is a faceless man).

For this week's episode: Tan is New (but with some spice).

Pls beware, this will require a certain level of "bear with me", ok? Ok.

Also: long ass post, guys. Be prepared.

So, 1st things 1st: New is obviously studying abroad.

This would mean that, in all the episodes we've seen of the flashback, we wouldn't have seen New. Because he's literally in a different country (cue theory: New is Mhok working as a cook in Hawaii ksksksk /j).

Nevertheless, in the latest events of the past storyline, Non has just gone M.I.A. Which is definitely something you'd tell the kid's brother about. I'd be pretty pissed if I was New and no one fucking told me about my brother vanishing.

(I think it could definitely be argued that their parents might try to hide the whole getting involved with money laundry and even the pedophilic child revenge porn sex tape on Twitter thing, especially their mother. bc, considering their treatment of Non this episode, it would definitely cross my mind that they'd think something along the lines of "New shouldn't be worried about what his fuck up of a brother is involved with, he should just focus on his study". And idk if Thailand's national news would arrive to New in the US just like that (maybe, maybe not, I won't try to speculate too much, I think it's too much of a wild card). YET, I still think, regardless, they'd have their limits even if the rest was true and they'd tell him about his brother being literally MISSING. So yeah...)

So back on track: sure, the police "think" Non has run away with Keng

Or, was convinced by Tee's uncle to accept that storyline

but Non's parents don't believe that shit

("They're TRYING to make our son LOOK LIKE" not "They think our son HAS")

And I think the same feeling could've been passed to New by his parents or just by New himself. But even if not, I think it's pretty reasonable to assume he'd come back to Thailand after that news. Like, if my brother was missing, I'd feel pretty bad, my parents would feel pretty bad and I'd want to go back home and be with them a bit, follow things up close, at the very least.

So, assuming that's true, it's not weird to presume New could be back in Thailand by the time The Hidden Character (the film Non wrote, not the BOC reality show thing) airs. Which would lead us to:

Now, I've seen people say it's Tan, I've seen people say it's White, I've seen people say it's Bible (?)... To me, that's Tan. The voice that calls "Phee" seems to me that's Mio's voice and the person we see in the door, albeit he does resemble Bible, reads to me as him as well.

Besides, we see him being introduced to the class in the ep.9 preview so, yeah, it could be to throw us off, but I genuinely think it's just bc it's Tan.

Regardless, even if not, Tan will appear next episode. So... There's that. Question is: why?

We see both Tan and Phee moving to the gang's class next episode, which the gang points out as "weird". Now, idk why it would be weird to see people change schools in 12th grade but fine, I'm not gonna argue, maybe they know something I don't. Ig you could argue it's bc it's the last year but I'd say people have issues all the time (being the last year of school doesn't change that) and people also move houses all the time. So I wouldn't question it but ok. Moving on.

We know Phee has a connection to Non (as his ex-boyfriend) but we don't know why Tan would be there too. Sure, we can argue Phee has to have friends. But, ngl, if my friend asked me to move schools bc he wants to find out what happened to his bf who mysteriously disappeared, I'd politely decline. I'd support him in his endeavours, of course, but I wouldn't change my entire life for it. I could even go as much as to help him befriend them and hang out with the fuckers but I wouldn't move schools, I think.

So Tan must have a bigger motive, right? And what bigger motive than being the brother of Non, am I right?

Furthermore, we have to consider legal matters. They're all minors. Phee's father, of course, knows about Phee being, at least, friends with Non. And, even if he told him to stay out of trouble and that he himself would not go around poking in the business for Phee's own safety, I think he'd be okay with Phee moving schools for grief reasons (a.k.a being close to Non because that was his school) or even bc he knew Phee was trying to talk to his friends (I don't think he suspects the kids too much and honestly that's a terrible lack of sight on his behalf but, I mean, they're kids, I think it's fair to assume they're innocent).

But what about Tan? Assuming Tan is not Non's brother, would his parents let him move schools to the school where all those nasty kids who keep appearing on the news study??? I don't think so. Sounds dangerous. Things change, of course, if Tan is not actually Tan but New.

Non's parents, despite their obvious lack of parenting skills, care about him. He's their son. They'd want to know what happened. And, sure, New getting involved would be terrible for them (bc he's their son and clearly the favourite child and god forbid he wastes his potential studying there bc of Non's failures AGAIN), but if New specifically requested that, would they go against it? Would they go against their talented son and his show of altruism and love for his brother?? Especially when the police are not doing anything and it's just trying to close the damn case??? I don't think so.

Thus: Tan is New.

"But what about his legal name???", I hear you say. "If they're siblings they'll have the same last name!!" And yeah. That's true. Especially in Thailand where most surnames are exclusive to a singular family. But I thin- "What about the age gap??? New is older than Non!! His mom even refers to him as Non's phi!!!" Yes. I know. That's where the spice comes in:

NEW IS ADOPTED.

There, I dropped the bomb. This would mean that, maybe, his legal name wasn't changed from what it originally was. Sure, it could've, since he's now part of a different family but they also could've kept the original surname. Which is likely if New wasn't adopted in a normal fashion.

We have to consider how poor Non's family seems to be. Whether that's a new situation or it has always been like this we don't know. But that's something. Now, I'm not Thai nor do I live in Thailand but from what I read, income does factor a lot into whether or not a family can adopt a child (at least in theory). So I'd assume a poor family would struggle with it. Nevertheless, it seems Thai law puts a lot of value into family ties with the child so, maybe New was someone else's child originally like of a brother or a sister of one of Non's parents. Or maybe something else entirely, I don't know. I don't think it matters that much.

"That still doesn't explain the age gap though. Tan is only 2 months older than Non!!"

Well, that's still older. Would that qualify him as "phi", idk? Both Pimpa (Non and New's mother) and Non refer to him that way. But maybe that's just another way for the series to tell us there's a ver clear hierarchy between these brothers and Non comes second. Idk. (if you're Thai or know Thai culture well and would like to add input here, pls do)

"WHAT ABOUT THE PICTURES, DANTE???"

Ok, yeah, I know. They make a compelling case.

(I took the liberty to brighten them bc OMG WHY IS THIS SHOW SO DARK????)

And yes, in the picture further to the left it does seem like they have a huge age gap but also, in the picture right next to it, it doesn't seem so (in fact the kid in blue seems about the same age in both pics, only the other one doesn't). So maybe the kid in pic one is not Non, it's some other kid (could be, especially considering he's wearing blue and, as the fandom's most dear colour theorist @shannankle has pointed out on a lot of posts but most especially this one: Non's colour is red). Or maybe it is one of them and they just grew up at different paces, idk. It happens, man.

TBH I'm not greatly concerned about the pics. What I am concerned about is the narrative implications of this. That his parents's (and, as previously established, especially his mother's [who is the most present parent in his life, as stated by the parents themselves in ep.8])

favourite kid is the one who isn't even theirs by blood. That their favourite son is the one that is not actually their son (I obviously do believe adopted kids are as much people's kids as biological ones, family is made not inherited, but I mean this as strictly talking about the blood relations of these people)! That no one ever loves Non enough to actually save him from doom (bc, like a fairytale princess, the thing that could prevent Non's demise was love).

If his peers had loved him enough he wouldn't have felt the need to cling to that awful gang. If Jin had loved him enough he would've helped him get away from Tee in this episode, at the very least. If his parents had loved him enough, they would've prevented him from falling prey to so many people or, at least, would've been trustworthy for him to talk to and helped him get out of the situations he was getting himself into.

This would also play well with the character's names:

Non. That which/whom isn't.

Who isn't seen, who isn't heard, who isn't loved, who isn't perfect, who isn't who people expected him to be, who isn't the gang's friend, who isn't his parent's perfect son (not blaming him but that's how they see it), who isn't the boyfriend Phee hoped he would be (not blaming him for the sexual assault he suffered, just seeing it through Phee's eyes, pls don't misinterpret).

New. That which/whom is fresh, original. That which just arrived.

Who is a prodigy, a talent, one of a kind. Who is so different from Non and his "crooked ways". Who arrived at the family later. Who just arrived in Thailand, who just arrived in Non's school. Who is a new person, who has a new identity, who has a new life goal.

So, yeah, it is a bit crazy and depends on a lot of circumstantial and potential facts that have not been hinted towards AT ALL by the show. And I recognize that. But I think this is what is fun about theories and speculation and, even if this is not true (likely), I still had fun crafting this and showing it to you guys. At the very least it's entertaining and keeps us thinking.

Pls feel free to add stuff or question stuff in this post, I'd love for us to work together as a community for our little murder gays show. Hehe.

Also, I'll leave you a question myself: if this is true, does it mean Phee and Tan are working together as the killers, only one of them is killing or neither is committing murder? 🤔

#dff #dff the series #dead friend forever #dead friend forever the series #dff theory #dff the series theory #dead friend forever theory #dead friend forever the series theory #dff ep 8 #dff the series ep 8 #dead friend forever the series ep 8 #dead friend forever ep 8

[hallofharmony]

ok i've been meaning to make this post for a while bc i haven't seen anyone else do this but

sky: cotl terminology!

sky fandom has a lot of terminology that could be confusing if you're a new player or just don't interact with the fandom that much. below is a list of words you might see around and what they mean. let me know if i missed anything ^-^

Sky kid/skid: the little guy you're playing as.

Moth: New players in sky. usually rock the default look. they're called this because the brown cape kinda makes them look like real moths :3

Butterfly: An advanced moth. usually wear base game cosmetics like plain capes and masks. have figured out the general mechanics but not enough to be considered an advanced player.

Veteran: Someone who's been playing for a while. you "officially" become a vet if a spirit from your first season comes back as a TS.

Chibi: player who wears the base game mask that makes them small, known as the "chibi mask".

Ikemen: players that are subjectively considered "handsome". Usually vets that wear rhythm or fire prohet pants, any of the elders' hair and owl hair, among other things. ikejou is the female equivalent.

Ts/traveling spirit: a spirit from a past season returning after a lengthy period of time (at least a year) where you're able to buy their cosmetics for regular candles while they're at home for 4 days.

Sc/season candles: orange candles that are strictly used to buy seasonal cosmetics from current season spirits. you obtain them from doing dailies during season, as well as getting them from candles scattered around the realm

Cr/candle run: refers to an activity where you go around collecting candles

wl/winged light: The little glowy guys that give you wings, increasing your stars

wl run/winged light run: refers to an activity where you go around collecting winged light

wedges/stars: the pattern on your cape that indicates how many winged lights you have

Owl hair: hair that has 2 tuffs that resemble an owl. like the season of rhythm ult hair or the season of performance ult hair

Ult/Ultimate reward: Cosmetics you receive from the season guide when you buy the season pass. Ults are the only cosmetics that don't return after a season ends.

Chibi fall: A glitch utilizing chibi mask. here's how to do it.

Oob/out of bounds: referring to going outside the wind walls and outside the borders. oobing is a big part of sky culture :)

Piggy rocket: a glitch utilizing the piggyback friendship emote, where when 2 players press the piggyback icon on each other at the same time they shoot in the sky, never seeming to stop.

Wind walls: invisible walls made of wind that prevent players from going outside the level to places they shouldn't be.

Krills: fan given name for the big scary dark creatures that roam in wasteland. As far as im aware, they're only ever strictly referred to as "dark dragons" in game and never as "krill" officially

Tgc/thatgamecompany: the developers behind sky.

sky: The Light Awaits: The beta of sky (before the current beta) where tgc allowed a handful of people on to test the game. thought to include this one as i was confused to what it was when i started playing :)

Elder names: again including these because i was also hella confused about them as a new player. but you might see some people use these names to refer to the elders, all of them being from concept art

Daleth: Isle elder

Ayin: Prarie elder

Teth: Forest elder

Sahmekh: Valley elders (sah being the spiky haired twin and mekh being the other one)

Tsadi: Wasteland elder

Lamed: Vault elder

Alef/Resh: Eden Elder/ The king

that last few are spoilers for the end game.

Ac/ ascended candles: candles you obtain after giving winged light to statues in eden. for every 4 statues you get 1 AC

Orbit: the place you end up in after you die in eden, where you go to be reborn.

Megabird: Giant star swirl thing you see at the end credits and hinted at throughout the game. called "megabird" in concept art and made out to be a god. more info

#long post #sky children of the light #sky cotl #thatskygame #that post i reblogged reminded me of this hajjs

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for not wanting to hang with my childhood friend?

Ok so a little backstory to give context.

I (35F) had a friend (35F) growing up that I have always been close to, since we were in middle school (11yo) up to when I moved away (10 years ago) from my home country (in Europe) to another country (also in Europe). We have been best friends but had other friends too, it was never just us against the world. Anyhoo, I moved away for personal reasons (unrelated) about 10years ago and basically made myself a new life in my new country, with new friends and so on. I don't really like going back to my home country so I haven't done so in basically 10 years. I've kept in touch with this friend but basically only through social media.

Now to the present day. I now have 2children (3M, 1F) and I've gone back on holiday to the homeland for them to spend time with their grandma (my mother). We've (my husband, the children and myself) been here a while so I've told my friend that I'm here (we live basically in the same town) and she's very insisting about us meeting, like asking me every day or so. She has also children (6F, 1M)

I've met her a couple of times (first time basically the day after we had arrived), the first time w my husband and then just the two of us with iust children (luke playdates). Now to the asshole part. The first week she was VERY insistent on meeting, asking several times a day and wanting to make all kind of plans on what to do and so on and after a couple of excuses I told her that I had just arrived in [homeland] and just wanted to chill and spend time w my husband and children. She said she understood. She keeps asking for meetings (less frequently but still a couple of times a week) and tbh I don't want to meet up.

The problem being that my husband (30M) doesn't want to hang w my friend bc he said that she just ignores him completely to just talk to me and only me; moreover she basically doesn't speak English (I obvs speak our common language w my husband and my mother tongue w my friend. My husband knows a bit if my mother tongue but is not fluent. We are both very fluent in English and could use it as a common language) so communication is very stumped, with me always having to act as interpreter (that is, if she has any interest in talking someone else than me).

Me myself could hang w just her/her and the kids (mine or ours) but tbh I don't really want to spend time without my husband for her. He has no problem with me being away nor am I jealous of him or anything it's just that we like each other and want to spend time together. We both worked very much last year and our relationship has taken some strain. We looked forward to the holidays to be able to spend time together & with the children.

Tl;dr childhood friend is very insisting on hanging out and I don't really feel like it so I ditch her. AITA?

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole

[disastercit]

ok, sex episode commentary, lets go

(camp camp s5 episode 3 spoilers)

-the magazine????

-something does feel distinctly different about the writing and characterizations this season (especially with david), is it a new writing team or just a product of it having been 4 or 5 years since they wrote the last season?

-cj.

-FLOWER SCOUTS!!! but not really :( damn I was hoping to fill out my bingo slot but I don't think this counts

-even the cobwebs have hearts in them 😭

-the three genders: woodscouts, flower scouts, and the delightful jesters at camp campbell

-DAVID WHY ARE YOU USING THE BDSM SKYDIVING MAGAZINE FOR THE SEX ED

-hes suffering so much free him :(

-fucking gen alphas god damnit. this hit so close to home bc my younger cousin is in the 6th grade and this is exactly how she sounds to me 😭

-"they're" just like nerris? nerris nonbinary self discovery arc for realsies???

-nah they're just being gay

-maybe I'm wrong about ereds age? it almost seems like she doesnt even have periods yet, I mean it's possible she does and just has the bare minimum understanding of it but it doesn't really seem that way.

-and then she pretty much immediately gives a huge clue to her age lol. if she's a freshman in high school then she's 14 or 15, which is pretty much what I had guessed.

-david getting called a Beta Cuck in an actual camp camp episode is something I did not see coming

-junior counselor ered???

-gwen you are a modern 21st century woman why are you still reading porno mags 😭 I knew it didn't belong to a camper but I'm surprised I didn't guess it was gwen's just from how freaky the cover was

-also David flipped through that entire magazine and looked at every image in it to place those stickers. I know he has questions

-quartermaster please I'm so tired of adding trees to your bingo square I can't do it anymore

-the preview looks interesting but I really hope it's good, considering how it's probably the last episode of camp camp that will ever be made 😕

bingo squares I've managed to fill from this episode: Mom-Gwen, Qm is a FREAK (AGAIN)

#camp camp #camp camp spoilers #cc spoilers #cc season 5 spoilers #camp camp season 5 spoilers

[heymeowmao]

2023.12.17 - https://weibo.com/l/wblive/p/show/1022:2321324979512155701380

Carnation Music Festival 3.0!!

LYN: Hallo everybody, good evening. We are the Modern Brothers! There are so many people here, right? LYN: Can you hear the laugh track, though? That's the most important thing. Very important. // You can? Ok. LYN: Welcome to our 3rd Carnation Music Festival~ It's been a long time since our last one, so many friends were missing it. The reason why I decided to hold it today was in order to thank you for all of your support/protection.

C: Where are the carnations? LYN: WE are the carnations!

C: Sit down! LYN: No. Let me tell you- I'm going to spend this whole thing standing. Today's proceedings will be like a true music festival. We've done this twice already, so this time we need to upgrade. I'll do this whole stream standing. LYN: All the other ones I was sitting and singing, so this time I have to be standing. So I can show you something new. But somehow it seems like I'm about to hit the ceiling. I'm about to make a slam dunk. /looks up/ Oh? Why are the top lights on? Those make me look ugly... Well, it's okay. I'm ugly enough. It doesn't make a difference.

LYN: Today is nice. It'll be fun. This is Da Fei, our keyboardist. A lot of people ask me why I'm called "Modern Brothers" Liu Yuning. Where are my brothers? Did they run away? No. This is my keyboardist, Da Fei. He is a member of the Modern Brothers. And this is my guitarist, Ah Zuo. We used to be a small band; we were working our butts off every night singing in the bar. Then one day we finally made it- we debuted. LYN: But lately because I've entered the acting industry, their work became less. Now it's hard for us to meet up. But YNGS is about to finish airing, so I figured we could get together again after such a long time away. It's a small reunion. C: Da Fei-ge got rounder. LYN: Yeah, but Ah Zuo is not any better off. He's standing further back so it looks like he's thinner, but he actually gained a lot. LYN: Anyway, today we're just going to be singing. I hope you can spend a relaxing and wonderful night with us. The equipment is a little lacking, because we're just in my house. The camera broke, so we're making do with what we have- the quality might not be as good. But we're just going to have fun, so don't expect too much from me and consider this a concert. I want to say, though- my concert definitely won't look like this. If you're expecting to come to my concert next year, please don't let this lower your expectations.

C: I need to go to class! LYN: Many of you are busy. If you're busy you can do your thing. There's always the playback. You can watch it then.

LYN: Let's start this off with a song! And let me also warm up my voice! Friends- it's like this. I wrapped up at 12a last night and I came back home and we were rehearsing until 5a. You thought we just moved the instruments and were ready to go, but no- we were rehearsing until 5a. We are offering this concert up to you. It was made for you. My voice is so fricking tired; it's hoarse. So please be magnanimous if the results are not too good. Let me sing a small song first and we'll test out the sound. Earlier, before we started the stream, the computer just died. We were all flustered.

LYN: Let's do a small song first, and see how it goes. This is a benefit- a gift for all of you. This- I want to sing while standing, but it makes controlling the computer more complicated... LYN: Look at these- we prepared a lyrics book, too. We're being serious, today. Okay. Let's try it. - /Ah Zuo starts playing the first notes/ LYN: ! Wait! Ah Zuo hasn't been in a stream in so long he's anxious to start. He can't wait to get the song started. LYN: Don't panic. Don't panic. Because I am already panicking. - /tells Ah Zuo to stand more in the front bc he's gonna block him from where he's standing/ C: Ah Zuo's excited! LYN: No, he... he's just got a rushed personality.

春风十里

LYN: Thank you! Thanks for your support. C: I'm excited! LYN: You are? I am too. When I was singing I also started shaking a little. My hands started shaking, because it's been a really long time since I've properly sung a song in my stream and especially as the whole band. I'm a little flustered but it's okay. We have a long time for tonight. I'll spend a long time with you tonight, okay?

C: There's a glare on the mirror. LYN: The mirror? What mirror? Oh, you mean my glasses? That's the way it's supposed to be. A singer can't let you see their eyes clearly. That way you'll think they are mysterious and you'll desire to see into their inner heart. It's on purpose.

C: Why is Ah Zuo wearing slippers? LYN: They're my slippers, what's wrong with that? Do you want to steal them away?

C: How long do you usually stream for? LYN: I usually start with around two hours. I'm not like a lot of other artists out there who only stream for an hour at most. Here with me, I make sure you're full. That you've had enough. I start with two hours. To this day the longest I've streamed is around four + hours. My livestream is more like a security monitor- I leave it on for hours so you can come once in a while to look at me. I want to make sure you have enough. People in Dongbei have big portion sizes.

LYN: The next song is one of mine- it's called Fall in Love. When you heard I was going to do 3.0, did you buy light sticks home? Did you? No? LYN: I just saw a comment that read, "Ge, I have already put my makeup on and gotten my nails done. Now I'm ready to watch LYN's stream." You don't need to be so polite. You put on makeup at home, in order to watch my stream? That's a big honor. C: I bought snacks. LYN: Oh, you bought duck necks and snacks in preparation to watch my stream? C: I don't have light sticks, I have a small sun. LYN: Wow. That's warm. LYN: Anyway, this song- Fall in Love- if you're watching on your phone, then turn on the flashlight! When you're watching my stream, you can dance along. We want an online-offline experience. Okay? Sway along. C: I have Harbin sausages. (stick-shaped) LYN: Wow, amazing. C: A cat toy. LYN: Okay- I don't really care what type of "棒" (stick) you have, as long as you move along with me. This song is called "Fall in Love."

Fall in Love (remix)

LYN: How is it? C: He gave me a heart! LYN: Yes, I'm just that greasy.

C: Where are the people? LYN: You must be lagging.

LYN: This /gestures at DF/- yes, this is LYN. He's gotten fatter lately.

LYN: Hold on, let me make some adjustments. // We don't have such refined stage design like different angles or anything. I thought if I had the follow-effect it would bring the mood up. Right? It makes the room look much more lively. LYN: Let me introduce myself again. I am Modern Brothers Liu Yuning. If you like us, then please subscribe. Thank you to everyone who has come to watch my stream today. LYN: It's our Carnation Music Festival... ! Oh- we didn't set the logo up. Hold on a second. I need to advertise this. - /making the logo/ LYN: Red looks festive. How about that? Isn't it fashionable? I think this design is worth 200RMB, what do you think? C: Looks tacky. LYN: Let me tell you the origin of the Carnation Music Festival. Why is it called that? One day we were singing and streaming and it just so happened to be Mother's Day; so we named the music festival "carnation", because that's the flower you gift to mothers. LYN: Is it too tacky? When something is tacky to an extreme it becomes fashion. // Let me see if I can change the font. Which font do you want? - /taking audience input and changing the font/ LYN: This isn't any better! C: What about yellow? LYN: Yellow isn't eye-catching. /changes it/ This isn't any better! It doesn't matter. Then, let's make it smaller. I'll put it on DF's face. Isn't it suitable? // Let me find somewhere to put it... C: You don't have an artist on your team? LYN: What team do I have? My "team" is just a small studio- it's only a few people. LYN: Let's just leave it somewhere it won't get in the way. (bottom right) Here is fine. Let's not worry about it anymore. LYN: It may look tacky, but it's what's at the core that counts.

LYN: Is there anyone watching who is studying graphic design? You can come to my company to work. Your job will be to make the Carnation Music Festival logo. C: How much is the salary? LYN: 30k(RMB) a month. But the probation period is five years. In those five years you'll spend it "learning." After five years, your benefits will be one month's worth of salary. C: The probation period is three years? LYN: No. Five years. Even worse. That's a black-hearted boss right there.

LYN: These few days- because everyone knows I was going to hold the festival- so I looked up songs that you all requested. There are some I always sing, but since you keep requesting them I figured we would try to reminisce back on those times. So now I have a bunch of songs I used to sing before. I even made lyrics sheets for today- how professional is that? LYN: These music stands- I bought them yesterday. I tried to buy them and couldn't find a single one in all of Hengdian. In the end we found an instrument store- you'd think a place that sells musical instruments has music stands, right? They didn't. So I asked them if they could sell me any second-hand. But the owner said, "If I sell these stands to you, what about my students??" I told him, "I don't care!" XD In the end we bought each for 50rmb. 150rmb for three. But the owner said, "I'll sell you two, and let you borrow the third. Return one to me and I'll return you 50rmb." Deal. So we bought these at the last minute and they're a little rough.

LYN: Let me introduce myself again, because there could be a lot of new friends here. You might have seen my drama, and I hope that through this stream you can get to know me better. People always ask why I am called "Modern Brothers" Liu Yuning. It's because we used to be a group- a small band, even though we weren't very famous. We were called the Modern Brothers, so I always say I am Modern Brothers' Liu Yuning. This is Modern Brothers' Da Fei. This is Modern Brothers' Ah Zuo. They are my keyboardist and guitarist- very cool. Now because most of the time I'm shooting dramas, so they are out of work. They're at home just idling.

C: Are there any benefits for new fans? LYN: You mean how if you buy an iQIYI membership for the first time you get a bit of a discount? Is that what you mean? Are there any benefits for new fans...? Yes. This next song is just for you. You don't have to think about the meaning behind this song. I am just forcefully saying that this is your gift. This next song is for all the new friends who have just "won" (learned about) LYN. If you haven't subscribed to my weibo yet, please do so.

男孩别哭

LYN: Okay. We've sung some faster songs, now let's move on to something more gentle. There were a lot of songs people really liked, but we never could find the accompaniment for them. But now I have my band, so now they can help me play the song. Now I can sing all the songs you want to hear and I want to sing. Don't worry- I have a lot of fun things planned. We were rehearsing until 5a! So I want to thank all of you who come to watch my stream on time. Thank you all.

C: I want to hear 赤. LYN: Ok. If I'm in a good condition, we'll try it. Don't rush.

C: Can you take th logo away? LYN: How much do you hate our Carnation Music Festival logo?? This is! The soul of our music festival. Without this logo, this whole thing would lost its strength/meaning. Don't hate it.

LYN: This next song is something a lot of you requested, and I did sing some of. But I didn't do a good job then, because the accompaniment was for a woman's key.

问风

LYN: I want to remind you again- if you're watching my stream it would be best to do so with headphones. We're all wearing earbuds, so what we hear is pretty much what you hear. If you're just playing through phone speakers it might lack a little.

C: There are no lyrics... LYN: You want to sing along with me? We don't really have the complete equipment. Because the accompaniment is live, so there are no lyrics. I'm sorry. But later there are some songs for which I will play a track and those WILL have lyrics. I can't turn the lyrics on. C: You can't remember the lyrics? LYN: ... LYN: There's nothing we can do, because the track is live.

C: I'm broadcasting it to my tv. LYN: Nice. If you're watching my stream and your equipment allows, watch with headphones. We want surround sound- Dolby sound effects.

C: The volume of the music is a little low. LYN: Are you serious? It's low? Is it because you're not wearing headphones? LYN: It probably is a little low. When we first started, the computer froze a bit. So now it's... It's not low? Ok! Try to wear headphones if you can, though. This stream is a little rougher because we didn't have a lot of time to test the equipment.

C: Ning-ge, do you have a lottery today? I want soybean oil. LYN: /sigh/ It's been so long since I streamed, and you bring that up? But thanks for mentioning it, because it IS a shame. I should have prepared some real benefits- gone to the market to buy ten jugs of soybean oil to raffle off. I'll admit it- that was my lack of oversight. I really should have made this stream full of benefits. The grand prize would be ten bottles of oil. Ten jugs. Bottles are a little small. LYN: Many of you may not know. If you check in to my Super Topic- it's called Modern Brothers- when you check in for 300 days you can win a jug of soybean oil. 1000 days and you can take away a bag of rice. We'll send it to your house. No eggs, though. Those things are too easily breakable. C: Ning-ge, I've checked in for more than 500 days now. LYN: Let us owe you. It's like this- one day if you see me on the street you can say, "Liu Yuning! Give me my soybean oil! You owe me soybean oil!!" How incredible would that be? You've chased stars to the extend that the stars now owe you. That's impressive. LYN: Our main theme is "owing each other".

C: Ning-ge, can you sit closer? I can't see. LYN: Send me your address, I'll go to your house. Send me your address, I'll grab a plane ticket. No matter where you are, I'll go to your house. I'll send the goods straight to your door. If you can't see me clearly, send my studio your address. I'll go to your house. I'll let you see me clearly.

LYN: The next song is another slow one. /to AZ & DF/ Is everything okay? I've been talking for five minutes, waiting for you. Did you forget the sound? It's okay. You can take your time to look for it. Based on my skills, I can hold out another five minutes for you. business abilities have degenerated so quickly. Let's leave him some face and allow this mistake today, alright? I won't dock his pay for this. We'll look for it together. LYN: /sighs/ ... /snores/ - /lets them figure it out while he preps more coffee/

C: Why don't they have chairs? LYN: I'm bullying them. No- they have chairs, look. I'll be standing later when I'm singing, too! I was planning on giving them chairs to sit on while I stood, but then I thought that if I were standing and they sitting, it would look like the didn't have anything to do with me. Look- Ah Zuo has a long seat he could sit on. I'm sitting now but later I'll also stand. It's all to make the mood. You think their legs aren't numb??

C: What are you drinking? LYN: Coffee. So I can maintain my levels of excitement. C: If you drink too much you'll need to use the restroom. LYN: At concerts they even give me five minutes to change outfits! You're really not planning on letting me stop?? It's like you're afraid. "Ning-ge, don't drink water or you'll need to use the restroom." I get five minutes to change my outfit during my concerts. This is just a small livestream.

LYN: Hold on, I'm not ready. YOU are, but I'm not. What key is it? LYN: See? I gave them time and now they're turning it around and rushing me. LYN: It's alright. I'm joking.

LYN: Isn't it amazing? This keyboard can even play the sound of a pipa. Our musicians are so professional~ It makes Da Fei look a lot more handsome. Play it again. I haven't heard enough.

落了白

LYN: Ok. Let's move straight into the next song. What did you think of it? It's a song I wanted to sing a long time ago and it's something you really like. So this time I asked them to make an accompaniment so I can sing it. Just listen for entertainment.

C: I don't dare go to the restroom. LYN: You can take your phone in there with you, okay? It doesn't matter. Don't think that if you take me into the restroom it would be an insult to me. I'm not afraid of being insulted, at the moment.

LYN: Anyway- this next song has unexpectedly become hot again. Wait- it's always been hot. Excuse me. But! You've heard my cover of it and thought it sounded nice, so... I'll use the Carnation Music Festival 3.0 to sing it again. It's a song I sang many years ago, but it seems like my audio has been circulating around the short video platforms. It's called 等我先说. - /AZ revs up/ LYN: /who just took a sip of coffee/ !! Wait a minute. Don't rush. Let me recover a bit. These two... once they're familiar with the song they're ready to go with it. 等我先说. It's a song I did a cover of before. - /warms up his voice/ LYN: My throat hurts a little.... /sigh/ Let's do it.

等我先说

LYN: It's been a long time since I sang this. But I was going through it when we were rehearsing and I found out I still remember how to sing it. So... we can use it to reminisce. I know that you've requested a lot of songs, but I can't sing them all. This one, I felt, was more meaningful. So I decided to sing this one.

LYN: The next one is called 乌兰巴托的夜 (Nights in UlaanBaatar). It'll be a little difficult for me, since my voice condition is not very stable. But I hope- you don't have to use your light sticks. For this song you can close your eyes, and listen quietly.

C: You even rehearsed? LYN: Of course! I wrapped at 12a, we came back to eat a little, and it wasn't until we rehearsed until 5a that I let them go. THEN I was removing my drama makeup and washing up. It was all for presenting to all of you a good condition and relatively more complete performance. It's my first time singing this song, so... you all can just listen for fun.

- /promptly drops his lyrics sheets/ LYN: Look at this- a 50RMB music stand is just basic. It doesn't even have a sheet clip. We need a bottle of water to hold the papers.

C: I'm lagging. LYN: Is it lagging? There's nothing I can do about it, since my stream today is a little more popular than usual. Many of you might be watching me in YNGS, and came to check out my stream. I want to thank everyone who is supporting YNGS and hope you continue to do so. Thank you. If you haven't subscribed to my weibo yet, you can do that too.

乌兰巴托的夜

LYN: The next song is 茶底世界. It's something you've always been requesting. I don't think I've sung this song since my debut. But it's also a very nice sounding song. I saw you requesting it again, so I decided I would sing this rock n' roll style song for you. - /warming up/ C: That scared me! LYN: Oh, did I scare you? Sorry.

茶底世界

LYN: Thank you. Oh- I suddenly thought of a song. 花房姑娘. We haven't sung it in a while. It's not in our song list, but it's okay. I just remembered that you liked when I sang it, before. LYN: /to DF/ Give me a key. Let's see if I can still sing it. - /tries to sing 恋语1910 instead/ LYN: No, that's not it right? - /gets the right one/ LYN: Ok. I can try it. Let's go. LYN: Hold on... I want to fake-play my guitar. I just want to make myself busy. - /the strap is not on, so he asks DF is he can squeeze it on there/ LYN: ? I think I have another strap there?? You can take it first, see if you can get it on.

C: Ka-ka. LYN: /grabs his kazoobie (kazobo??)/ Kaka will always be here. Kaka will never lose an opportunity to present itself. If I don't show it off, then I bought it for nothing. - /starts playing Offer (奉上) & Don't Dream of Cold (别梦寒) on it; then My Heart Will Go On/ LYN: I can play anything. It's unbeatable.

- /DF comes back/ LYN: Does it work? It's a little unstable? Ok. Even if this hundreds of dollars guitar gets smashed today, this stream would be worth it. LYN: For the sake of this stream- - /tries to put the guitar on but the strap is too short/ LYN: Can we make this longer? I'm too tall. - /makes it longer/ LYN: Now it's too long. Whatever. I'm fake playing anyway. LYN: ! Where's my phone? I need to look up the lyrics. LYN: I'm so busy. I feel like I'm going to die. But it's okay- every good performance comes with some sacrifice. C: You look pretty rock and roll. LYN: Do I? Great- that's the look we're going for. You don't have to think about what sound it's making- it's just for looks. Now, where should I put this (kaka)? /laughs/ As if I weren't busy enough! Should I hang it off my belt/pants? I'll just put it here (on the music stand). I can just grab it and start playing. Okay. LYN: You go first. ! Wait- my lyrics!! How do I make the screen stay on for longer??

花房姑娘

LYN: I almost busied myself to death. The main theme of my stream is to be busy and bustling. But it's alright. LYN: Do you like this type of mood, friends? If you do, we can... do another. LYN: How does 一块红布 go? // Hmm. I won't sing this one. Let's sing something gentle. We got a little hyped up, and we'll still be later but I want to be gentle and warm right now.

LYN: This next one is a song I really really like. And- /confirming the key/. Sometimes when I'm emo I'll listen to this song and it will make me happier. Or rather, it will make me even more emo. XD But I really like this song. C: What song? LYN: You'll know when I sing it. I'll have to sooner or later. I don't think we did this one well in rehearsal, so I've forgotten how it goes.

給你給我

C: I'm sleepy now. LYN: Then go to sleep! If you can't stay up, then go to sleep. Thank you. Friends, if you're sleepy, you can go. I'll never force you to stay. If you're sleepy you can go rest. If you're not, then keep me a little company while I stream. LYN: I was planning to sing this one next- 熬夜 (Stay Up All Night). But now you're telling me you're sleepy?! I was planning to sing this song next, but now I don't really want to. Will it seem like I'm forcing you? LYN: I'll let everyone rest. DF & AZ can go out and play. I'll sing Stay Up All Night for you. Hold on- let me find the track. ~ 我熬了一整 YEAH! (夜)~ LYN: Now it's a happy song. For all the friends who like to stay up at night. C: It's just past 6p and you're sleepy?? LYN: It's good- sleeping early is good for your health. // Young people nowadays... start getting sleepy at 6p? /smh/ Alright then. What are you doing in the morning?? Are you going to climb a mountain? Go jogging? If you really have such good habits, then it's okay.

熬夜

LYN: This song is called Stay Up All Night- its one of my singles, I guess. If you like it, you can go give it a listen. C: You really can stay up all night... LYN: Right?

LYN: Anyway, this stream is to thank everyone who might have come to know me through a drama. I'm very happy and honored to become your friend. Today is our very amazing Carnation Music Festival, version 3.0. I took a look the other day and the last one was in 2021! We took two years to get this even up and running again. What we're aiming for is... longevity. Since 2021 was so long ago. LYN: Our stream today is to give back to my family, all my good friends and fans, to the people who like LYN- or even if you don't like me, those of you who came to check me out. This stream is for you. I hope this stream lets you have a relaxing, happy, and wonderful night. Okay?

LYN: This next song is a relaxing one- it's called 撞地球 (Earth Collision). There are some lyrics in it that I really like. ~ Sometimes I don't want to live anymore, but then I think that there are others more deserving of death. ~ LYN: I started liking this song just because of one lyric. I think the mentality of this song is really great. LYN: Oh, this song- am I worthy of picking up the guitar for this one? But is it really that rock? If it's not, then I won't hold it. As long as it's a little bit rock, I can hold it. But then, does this (kaka) go to waste? I can't use it, right? - /setting up/ LYN: You know- we make all these adjustments as an excuse to stall for time. Because I feel like we're running out of songs! So I need to rely on these tactics to stall. XD - /starts but then stops, bc he feels like he's singing too low of a key/ LYN: Sorry, friends. You got hyped up a little too early. We made a mistake. You've already started dancing, but then suddenly we stopped.

撞地球

LYN: Thank you. Oh hey- is my speaker all charged up? That speaker? Friends, let me go use the restroom. And then... do you want to sing DF? He doesn't want to. Then, Zuo-ge...? XD LYN: We'll do a 3 minute intermission and I'll play a video. We have all sorts of tips and tricks, here. How about this- Zuo-ge can solo a little. - /gets distracted by staff/ LYN: Wait a minute, hold on. I need to go to the bathroom. I need to pee, what am I holding on to this (the mic) for?? LYN: Let Zuo-ge, my guitarist, do a solo while I use the restroom. They were going to bring the speaker over to me!! I'll go and come back. Wait for me a sec. It's a straightforward stream today, I'm not going to give excuses.

LYN: Wait, friends- there are a couple customers down here who are fighting. They're throwing water bottles. I need to go take a look. // Oh? The lights reflecting on my glasses is so interesting. I look like a robot. :) // There are customers fighting off stage. Let me go take a look.

AZ Guitar Solo!

- /LYN comes back advertising for collecting old washing machines with his speaker/ LYN: Why is the sound so low?? - /tests it and there's feedback. LYN: 😨!/ LYN: Now the sound is too loud. Then- we'll also just use it as a prop. I won't turn it on. But my computer can imitate the sound. :)

LYN: ~ Walk on, walk by, but don't miss out. Everything here is 10yuan, friends. 10yuan.~ C: Are you 10 yuan, too? LYN: Wait a minute! Wait- let me take a breather. // Don't you all say that I am your "baby"? How can you take me home for just 10 dollars?? You all say that I am the most precious to you, but apparently "most precious" is only worth 10 dollars. /sigh/

开到荼蘼

動情祭

LYN: /is tired/ Let me... sit a while.

LYN: Once again I want to thank all of you who have come to watch my stream today. If it's your first time watching, please subscribe to my weibo, okay? Thank you, thank you. It's not shameful to follow me. Thank you. You can follow my small/lowly weibo. I'm just a... a small singer, who is trying out acting. I hope you can support me. LYN: Thank you!

C: Watching your stream makes the rice go down! LYN: Am I a savory dish? Am I shredded pork with garlic sauce (yu xiang rou si)?

LYN: Right now.. YNGS should have already been uploaded. It's 7p now. It should be up. I was planning to stream from 5-7p- a two hour music festival. Self-proclaimed music festival. I thought it would be enough time, but it looks like we've messed up the timing.

C: Watching you stream makes me do my homework faster. LYN: You're not just writing nonsense are you? You're watching my stream while doing your homework, and you end up writing down the lyrics to the songs I'm singing as the answers?? It's asking you- "what's the principle behind the atomic bomb?" and you write "Because... Offer. I'm willing to take a thousand difficulties and dangers on my soul."

LYN: Normally I'll stream at least once month. I used to stream a lot more but lately I haven't had the time so... if you really like to see me then you can subscribe to my weibo. Sincerely. That way when I stream next, it will notify you. LYN: I really want to thank everyone who is in my stream and spent such a long time with me. Really, thank you. I especially want to thank those of you who are watching me in YNGS and have now come to my stream. Thank you for your support. I'm very brave, and I'm also very strong (minded). Thanks for your support and I hope we continue to head the same direction.

LYN: I have one last song. It's one that I absolutely must sing. No matter how tired I am, I have to sing it.

奉上

LYN: Thank you! LYN: It's about time. Again, thanks to everyone who has spent the night with us in this stream. Of it's your first time watching the Modern Brothers you can subscribe to our weibo. I hope in the days to come we can meet again. Thanks for watching and participating by leaving me comments. Thank you to the fans who always protect me, and those of you who are watching the drama and protecting me there, too. I don't want to say too much. In any case, I am grateful for your support and protection. LYN: I hope you had a relaxing, happy, and wonderful night. It was great to have you, and I hope you enjoyed yourself. Let's meet again at the next music festival, friends! Good night everyone!

LYN: YNGS has new episodes out, now. Go watch the drama! Check in to iQIYI and search for YNGS. You can check out our drama. Thanks for your support. Bye bye!

#Liu Yuning #lyn livestream #(2:19:10) #everyone should know this alr but he's such a great singer

[gordonzola-ramen]

My mutual @alectricblue tagged me in this game tag! I normally dont do these, but I thought it'd be nice to get to know me more (and also meet y'all if you wish to participate)!

It will be long though. Sorry

1. Were you named after anyone?

Was originally gonna be named Andrea after a ballerina my grandma liked! Sadly no one remembered her well, not even grandma, so I don't know much about her.

My deadname was simply just chosen bc it was easy to pronounce, as well as my chosen name Diego (it's what I would've been called had I been male), although when I chose it for myself I liked the JoJo character Diego Brando so there was some correlation there.

Funnily enough, people think I'm nicknamed Lio after the Promare character, but I hadn't met them yet.

2. When was the last time you cried?

Yesterday. At 11pm. Watching OR3O's One Piece song. It was nostalgic ok

3. Do you have kids?

Nope. There's an absurd amount of reasons I don't want them, although not a single one is because I dislike them. I've had to babysit many kids and they've all been very sweet.

4. What sports do you play/have you played?

Oof, my recent sports is taking my dog for a walk. But I used to like volleyball and kickball! And reluctantly played soccer and did swimming! Sports give me a lot of anxiety and i'm not sure why.

5. Do you use sarcasm?

I do a lot of teasing and lighthearted banter that can sometimes be considered sarcasm?

6. What's the first thing you notice about people?

Their eyes! Or anything outstanding like cool hairstyles or visible tattoos.

With online people, I mostly recognize them by pfp or a vague mental pronunciation of their username.

7. What's your eye color?

Dark brown?? Or black??

8. Scary movies or happy endings?

Honestly, whatever makes me think more. Unhappy endings tend to do that more though, so I guess scary movies! But of course it depends on the mood, sometimes I just want a nice story to cheer me up.

9. Any talents?

I've been told I am talented at the piano! And music in general, although most of my skills feel less like talent and more like just studying the thing.

10. Where were you born?

So I was born in the US, in Florida, but my entire family is from Costa Rica and I just happened to be born while my parents were studying abroad. I don't remember much from the US though, I came back to CR with my grandma in my first months because she was less busy than my parents, and then they came to live here again. So in my eyes I've been a true Costa Rican since always hehe

11. What are your hobbies?

Playing the piano! Also drawing sometimes (I like to color more than draw, but unless I get my hands on a coloring book I can't do that unless I draw), playing videogames (mostly RPGs and visual novels), and doomscrolling.

12. Do you have any pets?

YESSSS my beloved dog Mia!!!!!!!!!!! I love her so much, she escaped her abusive home and we found her while walking around a plaza, said hi, and she followed us home. She's been with us for 8 years now and I adore her. Reference below because how can I not show her off:

13. How tall are you?

Excellent question. I forgot but I'm average if that helps!

14. Favorite subject in school?

It changed over the years, in senior year it was English because we had my favorite teacher! I knew him for years because he has a literature club I partook in, so I was very happy to have classes with him. Plus, we saw the Oresteia, which goes tremendously hard especially when your teacher geeks out about all the symbolisms.

Apart from that, computer class! We barely ever had it, and almost had it cut out entirely in senior year, but the few times we did I really enjoyed programming and practicing typing! And when we didn't do anything we could play so.

15. Dream job?

I want to make my own videogame! So I'd say a game developer, although being a part of any videogame, especially RPGs, would be a dream come true.

Well thank you for reading, I hope that was some insight, it was very fun to reply!

Tagging section (no pressure to do it at all, you can also do it if you're not tagged who cares)

@skyllion-uwu @thefrogswhospoke @gorgeousuare @chronologicalimplosion @fishy-lilic @smoothedsmoothie @mx-mind @montied @aspirationatwork @jhofoyitchg @derkhue @mellomaia @federalfazbear @mcfinnigan @mutantsgurls @foxounderscorecube @sweetnessfollowsmp3 @mildredtefoneck @oh-my-stars1969 @unfullbucket @fluffnfuzzxoxo @electriceel69 @scottigyn @stressedsilverware @sapphicrobotenjoer @antjellies @milk1non-tolarantes @ovalbrain @chocokhaos @markdiegamer @astralix13 @atheist-xmas @blktomekurata @monstar-dreams @glass-duke @c--eam @laooneart

#ask game #tag game #gordonzola's corner #image described in alt

[dinoshimaaa]

woah (i think?) first genshin written piece on this blog hmmm

so i've been obsessing over sagau lately but make it that not everyone worships the character + kazuha being one of them!!!!!!!!! bc taking kazuha's character into account he just doesn't seem like one to devote all his life to some random god that "supposedly" created him so!!!!! contribution to kazuha kissers and sagau eaters ig

story is also based on how FUCKING spiteful i am mthat kazuboy didnt come home and sent one (1) heizou instead. who needs kazuha when you have heizou (delusional but also actually starting to like heizou)

she/her pronouns for reader/The Creator, @foxic sorry if you didn't want to be pinged (please let me know if its ok with you) but i wrote something finally hehehhe

ty @souglias for screaming over what i wrote, lots and lots of emotional support <3333

-

There is one thing that not everyone knows about Kazuha, and it is that he does not like The Creator.

It is not that he hates her, but he does not idolise her like the rest of Teyvat. Kaedehara Kazuha has never been one to bind himself to religion and worship — he is a leaf in the wind, a sailboat out at sea, constantly wandering to where his surroundings take him. Kaedehara Kazuha does not anchor himself to one place or one person because it is just not something he would do.

However, Kazuha has heard the multiple times The Creator has tried reaching out to him with affectionate words and actions that clearly spoke of her devotion to him. Words after words of her admiration and hope that he would be a property of hers filled Kazuha’s mind everyday. And while it made Kazuha feel slightly guilty that he did not return The Creator’s feelings, it still did not change the fact that he would not come home to her to be controlled by her.

So when The Creator had tried to use her hard earned Intertwined Fates to wish for him, he expertly dodged them, refusing to let an outside force take control of his own body and use him to her will. Just like he expected, he got weird looks from the characters waiting to drop down from the skies above into the arms of their beloved creator.

It didn’t mean that he didn’t feel bad when The Creator groaned when the zombie child from Liyue, Qiqi, dropped down instead of him though. His friend Shikanoin Heizou, who had yet to come home to The Creator, also noticed his hesitance and reluctance.

“Why don’t you just go home to her?” Heizou raised an eyebrow, noting the way Kazuha’s ones furrowed as he looked down at The Creator. “She’s been hoping you would come to her since last year. It’s not everyone that catches The Creator’s eye. Sure, I understand why you aren’t worshipping her like everyone else does, but since you feel bad, why don’t you just… well, go?”

Kazuha does not say a word.

Heizou sighs and scratches his head as a divine light shines down upon him, indicating his time to drop down to The Creator. “Oh well, you do you, friend. I’m also not religious, but I don’t think it would hurt to humour The Creator for a while.” He pats Kazuha’s back with a sympathetic smile before jumping from the skies into The Creator’s world.

Kazuha watches as his friend becomes The Creator’s newest vessel, who was still upset that the red samurai did not return home. His mind was in turmoil, a big contrast to how it would usually be clear and free after the Vision Hunt Decree ended. He knew that The Creator would inevitably use his body as a vessel once he came home, which was exactly what he was dreading, but a part of him wondered if he was being far too mean to someone who had been relentlessly hoping for him— only him— to come home to her.

Do you hate me that much? Kazuha hears The Creator’s soft voice in his head.

I do not know, he replies in his head, in hopes that The Creator will accept his sincere apology that does not hold any promise of relieving her distress.

-

Kazuha thinks he’s dreaming when he sees the divine Creator strolling around in Inazuma in all her glory.

As surreal as it might have seemed, there was no doubting the identity of the divine entity walking around Inazuma City with the Shogun. Even if he convinced himself otherwise, the constant chattering of the admiring and curious onlookers would continue to deny him. Even your striking appearance could wash away all doubts of a non-believer. Naturally, everyone would be curious of The Creator’s sudden appearance in Teyvat, because she was believed to have controlled the world from another dimension and never step foot in her own creation, but also because you were so dazzling and divine that even Kazuha’s breath was taken away when he caught a glimpse of you.

What was truly a sight to behold, however, was that the Shogun, one of your (self-proclaimed) most devoted acolytes, was following you around like an affectionate puppy. The Shogun. The Raiden Shogun, the Electro Archon, User of the Musou no Hitotachi, Her Excellency The Almighty Narukami Ogosho, was following you around like a lovesick fool, bidding to every demand (or rather, polite request) you gave her. Tomo would’ve loved to see this.

A part of Kazuha knew that he would eventually need to meet you at least once, since one: he already knew that you were inclined towards him slightly more than the other vision holders in Inazuma, and two: you seemed pretty adamant about meeting all the vision holders in Inazuma. And even if they wanted to refuse meeting you (not like any of them, apart from Kazuha, were against meeting your excellency), who in their right mind would reject seeing their very own creator?

Kazuha, that’s who. He’s sure you already know he isn’t as fond of you as Teyvat is, so he’s been dragging his inevitable meeting with you. Even when you look around in hopes of meeting a certain white haired samurai, even when Thoma and Ayaka convince him to just say hi to you, even when Ayato and Yae Miko try threatening him into meeting with your divine self, Kazuha always finds a way out to not see you.

But when he hears from the citizens that you’ve been walking around Narukami Island with Detective Heizou, one of his closest friends, he already knows today may as well be the day that you finally see the man who has been rejecting you from a different world.

(Despite him convincing himself that he does not like you, a sick, egoistic part of him wants to see you run up to him and profess your love for him.)

Kazuha curls his hands in fists and gulps when he sees you and Heizou approaching. When Heizou spots him, he excitedly tugs at your sleeve and pulls you over to a smiling Kazuha.

“I suppose you already know who Kazuha is, Your Grace,” Heizou winks, and you laugh lightly, not meeting Kazuha’s eyes. “After all, he’s the man who has been playing hard to get, constantly refusing to be your vessel before you entered this world.”

Yikes, Kazuha groans internally, but keeps his smiling facade on. Way to go, Heizou.

(Kazuha wonders what you will do when his eyes meet yours. He wonders if you would blush or stutter over your words cutely. He wonders if you would shyly tug on his clothes and ask if you could spend more time with him. He wonders how he would respond to that question.)

When his eyes really meet yours, he expects to see some emotion. All you do is stare wordlessly for a second before smiling and turning back to Heizou, greatly surprising Kazuha.

“Is he your friend?” You try asking the detective, who is in a similar state of shock as he is. Seems like he wasn’t the only one expecting you to swoon over the samurai on first meeting (but really, who with dignity would do that in public, let alone The Creator?)

“Uh… yeah! He just returned from a trip with Captain Beidou from Liyue, so you’ve chosen the right time to visit Inazuma if you want to meet the one and only Kaedehara Kazuha,” Heizou replies awkwardly, desperate eyes searching Kazuha’s in a silent request for answers. “Um, Your Grace, is there anywhere you’d like to visit? Perhaps Kazuha would like to accompany you— Kazuha, hey, say hi to Her Grace—”

“Ah, it’s fine,” you interject, to Kazuha’s and Heizou’s surprise again. “I’m sure Kazuha’s tired from journeying around with Captain Beidou, so we should spare him the trouble and give him time to rest.” With that said, you give a curt respectful bow to Kazuha before walking off towards Tenshukaku, Heizou following behind dazed and confused.

Not as confused as Kazuha, though. The samurai’s face twists in shock when you walk by him nonchalantly. No longing looks, no flustered face, no hopeful words, nothing he had expected you to give him. Just a polite but distant attitude and would’ve fooled him into thinking that you never cared about him in the first place.

But that can’t be, because way before you arrived in Teyvat, he had heard your constant pleas for him to come home to you, to finally be yours so you could use him as one of your favourite vessels. He was not oblivious to your desire for him, so why…?

(How odd. He should be enjoying the fact that you aren’t clinging to him, but the strange ache in his heart suggests otherwise.)

Before he can stop himself, he turns around and loudly calls out, “Wait…!” successfully gaining your attention. Kazuha didn’t know what overcame him when he decided to call for you without reason, and now you’re staring at him curiously. Heizou, on the other hand, had a slightly amused look on his face, since he was not expecting Kazuha, the Kazuha who had always rejected your advances, to call for your attention after you nearly ignored him.

That makes two of us, then. Kazuha gulps and puts on an apologetic, reassuring smile. “Sorry about that, I was mistaken about something. Please enjoy your stay in Inazuma, Your Grace.”

(Kazuha somehow dislikes the way you nod politely at him again before turning away, never once looking back at him.)

-

Kaedehara Kazuha has not been feeling well since you arrived.

Ironically enough, it wasn’t because of your presence, but the opposite. There was no effort needed in order to avoid you, because you just never seemed to look for him. He did try to take his mind off this, and it did work for a while— until he walked out of Komore Teahouse and saw you and Heizou giggling while walking out of Inazuma City together.

You and Heizou. Heizou and you.

You and Heizou.

Heizou and you.

Kazuha doesn’t deny the envy that comes when he sees his own friend hanging around the divine Creator so freely. (And perhaps it wasn’t just simple envy.)

That wasn’t the only time that made him wish he had been nicer in his attitude towards you. The other time when he was in the teahouse, he walked across a private room that so happened to house you and Heizou that day, and let’s just say that Kamisato Ayato should’ve made the walls more soundproof.

“I’m not sure, Heizou,” you laugh, but anyone can hear the small dejected feeling in your voice. “I get the feeling that he doesn’t like me very much.”

It doesn’t take a genius to figure out who that “he” refers to. “Your Grace, please don’t say that,” Kazuha hears the frown in Heizou’s voice, “He is just unable to adhere to your desires because of… certain reasons, but I promise you he doesn’t dislike you as much as you think.”

“Well that clearly wasn’t the case when I tried wishing for him, only for him to reject me twice,” you’re clearly joking when you say that. A part of Kazuha wonders just how much sadness you were masking when you said that. “I’m afraid I’ve unknowingly done something to upset him.”

Through the thin translucent walls of the teahouse, Kazuha sees Heizou’s silhouette put his hand on top of yours. He doesn’t bother to watch the conversation unfold any further and walks away.

By now, he had come to a devastating conclusion that perhaps he was more fond of you than he thought. He had been constantly trying to convince himself with his own morals, thinking his strong personal ideals could overpower the small part of him that admired you. Perhaps that small part of him, too, wanted to be yours, belong to you, and only you, contrasting his belief in leading his own life completely. Perhaps that small part of him, too, did accept you as his Creator and wished to be able to show the love that he had hidden for you all along.

And perhaps that small part of you, he might daresay, was jealous of Heizou for spending time with you.

The thought alone makes Kazuha want to pull all his hair out. It felt impossible for Kazuha, possibly the only vision holder to reject being The Creator’s vessel, to be jealous of someone who had every right to be loved by The Creator because he came home to her when he asked her to. This was retribution. It was his fault for rejecting you in the first place, and now he reaps what he sows.

His migraine is not at all relieved by more intruding thoughts of you and Heizou being together. Images flash in his head at random times with no apparent reason, all of which include you and Heizou being affectionate together. Laughing together, holding hands, feeding fried food to each other, going on strolls together, maybe even sharing an intimate kiss—

Kazuha’s cheeks flush in a dark red at the mere thought of it. What an unpleasant feeling. Forget you, what would anyone think of him imagining obscene images of The Creator in his head?

“Oh, Kazuha— Hey, you’re unusually red, are you alright?” Fortunately (or unfortunately), you rush over and break Kazuha’s train of thoughts. He only flushes more when you lean in to measure his forehead temperature with your hand, pure concern written all over your face.

“Goodness,” you pull back and bite your bottom lip — bless your caring self — “Kazuha, your body temperature is a bit high… do you need to rest somewhere? I can help you over—”

“Your Grace,” Kazuha interrupts you and wraps a hand around your wrist, using it to pull you towards him. It does nothing to stop the raging blush on his face, but said blush appears to have spread a little bit to you.

This time, he forces you to look him in the eyes for real. You don’t look away or ignore him or leave him hanging with a curt bow. He asks for your attention, all of it for a short while, through eye contact. You let him do so through silent consent.

“I…” Kazuha gulps, like he did many times during your first meeting, “I apologise for my rash behaviour, Your Grace. Please forgive me for this, and forgive me for my doubts towards you.”

You don’t speak, so he continues. The expression on his face is no longer flustered, but ashamed and regretful. “I wasn’t too keen on meeting you because a part of me didn’t want to acknowledge you as my Creator, my ruler, my god, and perhaps… I might’ve liked you more than I gave you credit for. I understand if you’re upset that I rejected you when you asked me to come home many times before—”

“No, no!” You interject nervously. “I- well, I didn’t want to force you home if you didn’t want to, so you don’t have to blame yourself over that.”

You’re not quite sure why the Kazuha before you is greatly different from the Kazuha in Teyvat when you were wishing for him. What caused his change of heart?

“...Your Grace, I must admit…”

Threats?

“I’ve been feeling a little peculiar lately…”

Influence?

“I was wondering if you would know about it. It only happens on certain occasions…”

Guilt?

“Like when you and… Detective Heizou were walking around together.”

Jea— oh.

Oh.

Oh!

“Don’t tell me you suddenly fell in love with me because Heizou was being friendly to me,” You teased him, “Goodness, just what must I do to gain your attention for once?”

“Huh?”

“I…” You awkwardly tuck your hair behind your ear, admitting, “I didn’t want to bother you in this world because I thought you would continue to dislike me.”

Kazuha stills, his expression morphing into one of regret and love. “My sincerest apologies, Your Grace. I never intended to make you feel unloved by me. I was earlier doubtful of my devotion to you, but it seems that the winds have brought me my answer.”

There is one thing that no one knows about Kazuha except you, and it is that he does not love you, he does not worship you, and he does not wish to be at your every beck and call because you are his god.

Or so he says, because if anyone saw how softly he was caressing and looking at you under the sakura trees of Inazuma City, they would think otherwise, artists would start painting a portrait of the two of you, and poets would immediately begin writing about how The Creator had finally chosen her favourite acolyte.

#dinowrites #genshin #genshin impact #genshin impact x reader #genshin x reader #heizou #shikanoin heizou #kazuha #kaedehara kazuha #kazuha x reader #kaedehara kazuha x reader #sagau #sagau genshin #sagau x reader

[transboysokka]

This is a big ask so don't feel like you have to, but would you be interested in pitching some summaries of the fics you have up on Ao3? I know there are summaries up there, but I like the casual way you have with words and you say fuck a lot and I dunno yeah

omg this is so funny bc i know the exact way with words you're talking about and of course im not gonna pass up a chance to promote my own work hehe YOU GOT IT!

i have 20 atla fics so I'm going to recommend them in order of... least to most kudos??? to try to trick people into reading more of my stuff? lol idk

I'm 99% sure all of these are Zukka fics...

The Last Five Years - ok actually this is a bad place to start bc i don't think im gonna finish it. it just really didn't take off but um its a The Last Five Years AU with really fucking sad Divorced Zukka

Do Not Stand At My Grave and Cry - this is i think my newest one, it has trans zukka and it's a bit angsty with a fake death but i also think it's kind of fun. it's the idea trans people have of ''who's going to care if my family puts the wrong name on my gravestone?" but there IS a happy ending

A Problem Halved is a Problem Shared - im gonna be honest i dont fucking remember writing this one lol but it says dialogue-only and it WILL be angsty bc it is about zuko and sokka dealing with different issues they have

One Last Time (and its sequel The End of All Things) - Actually OLT is definitely one of my faves I ever wrote. It's my canon-compliant take on um... *cough* Sokka's death, referenced in Korra. It's SO angsty but it has one of the most visceral scenes I've ever written and I DID cry writing this. TEoAT is the happy ending Divorced Zukka deserved with bonus Iroh but you WILL cry reading that too. BUT i cant fucking recommend these ones enough!!!!

If I fade away (the awful things we do to make the head go quiet) - VERY dead dove. trans zuko needs to pay a MASSIVE price to get home to the Fire Nation after Ba Sing Se, and it's not his choice at all. I love this but READ WITH CAUTION

In Which Sokka is Supportive Ally Boyfriend Goals - I am dead serious i like dont remember this one at all but i know it has trans zuko!

Nourishing the Flame Within - not the best written tbhtbh BUT it does have two very important Zukos in it that I hold to be universally true: trans zuko and eating disorder zuko

bad idea right? - okay this is DEF one of my faves lol its about divorced zukka but they just cant stop messing things up and sleeping with each other even though theyre not together anymore lolol

Keeping it in the Family - lmao OKAY SO this is the ONE version of zukka that im like 'ok all u z*tara folks, maybe zuko WAS with her and it obvs didnt work' and then he hooks up with sokka instead and its GREAT but oops now we have Family Drama

Scars of Trust - bro im not gonna like i barely remember writing this one but i remember I LOVE IT and it's about sokka who has been dating zuko a while but he finally learns that zuko is trans? its great

Playing the Long Game - eh, i don't love it, but I'd say it's worth a read. it was my first longer fic in the fandom. it DOES have a great Zukki evolution though if you're into that, and a nice mystery!! Also some whump and angst bc of course

Keeping Score - I liked this one! It's just little snippets of times Sokka has survived assassination attempts, because we always hear about it happening to Zuko, but Sokka gets them too. Angst obviously

It Was Cruel and It Was Wrong - wow, a dead dove fic, yes. It's basically like "If I'm Joo Lee and you're Joo Lee, then who's flying the bison?" Yeah so Sokka and Zuko are both brainwashed by the Dai Lee and Suffering but be careful because this gets DARK

Mother - Izumi has two dads but she feels bad she doesn't have a mom. But guess what, her dads don't have moms either!! She's very happy to find that out! Wow Izumi, way to have some sympathy.

Impact - It's about Zuko taking a longer time to recover from an assassination attempt than he'd want, and Sokka being loving and patient with him! I wrote this when I had a bad concussion for like three weeks and so it's pretty like. Medically accurate lol

Scratchy - Short and sweet. I don't remember this one much but I know that it is fluffy and involves turtle ducks!

Hidden Pain, Shared Love - Another short and fluffy one. It's about the first time Zuko sees that Sokka has problems with his leg sometimes?

Zuko and Sokka Get Engaged in the Most Zukka Way Possible - okay i actually really love this one because it's on brand and cute and also i made it fucking angsty because oF COURSE

Zuko Amongst the Dragons - yes so what if zuko was raised by dragons and met the gaang but he was super feral? and what if shenanigans ensued? AND what if sokka and zuko fell in love anyway????

#quesTian #Anonymous #fic #fic recs #atla #zukka #divorced zukka #trans zuko #trans zukka

[wannab-urs]

The Spreadsheet Digest - Vol 14

Howdy folks <3

Just a few recs this week and several I read a while ago. I read a shit ton this week, but it was all WIPs I've already recommended, so you're only getting a few new ones. I found some really interesting fics this week, though, and I'm very excited to share them with y'all!!

As always The Spreadsheet can be found here and all my other fic recs can be found here. Feel free to tag me in your fics!!

Recs below the Pedro <3

Says It Feels Like Heaven To Him - a Joel one shot by @proxima-writes

Just a really fucking good PWP. Joel comes home from poker night and he's horny and it's really fucking hot.

That Should Be Me - a Din one shot by @beskarandblasters

Reader is an idiot who hasn't told Din her feelings and gets jelly over Bo Katan and Din is an idiot who also hasn't told reader his feelings and then they bang. Oh and the razor crest is there bc AS IT FUCKING SHOULD BE. Miss her sm. Love an idiots to lovers story <333

Honeyed - a Joel series by @softlyspector

he touch averse reader concept is so so cool, I really like it. I love this cozy little slow burn so much. Watching her build trust with him and the way you hold true to the one step forward two steps back thing you introduce early on ahhhh. I like that she can handle his touch but it still makes her uneasy because it wouldn't feel as significant if he was just the special chosen one she can touch with absolutely no qualms about it. Anyway I hope there's more coming after part 2. I adore this <3

Be good - a Joel one shot by @hier--soir

motherfuckin submissive joel but like you can tell he's not the most submissive person on the planet he just really wants to make you happy and it also obviously gets him off. This is so fucking hot. I love every word of this UGH

The old college try - a Joel one shot by @proxima-writes

OH MY GOD. Slutty frat dad joel!!!! His slutty lil basketball shorts. The beer pong! The keg stand! THE SMUT!!!! This was so fucking hot. I... have no words. Gimme gimme.

With Cherries on Top - a Max Phillips series by @ithinkhesgaybutwesavedmufasa

Ok so I adore The Proposal. Great Rom Com. I'm such a slut for fake dating. (Someone should go back and see all things I've said I'm a slut for. It's a lot) Anyway... I really fucking like this. The way the vampire lore is adjusted to fit the story and woven in is excellent. I fucking love the bickering. I'm a banter ass bitch. Max is so good in this. Perfect amount of total douchebag with a heart of gold. Also I want him to bite me...

Decoherence - a Jack (Whiskey) series by @prolix-yuy

I hadn't seen Westworld when I read the first fic in this universe and I still haven't and I still don't care... This is such an insanely good fic. The world building and characterization is just absolutely mindblowing. I adored getting to see reader adjust to life post-Cognitive Dissonance. I'm hoping we get a pretty good insight into what Jack has been doing for the last year. I fucking love that they reunite exactly one year after their previous meeting ugh. I'm so fucking excited for this series, LJ, you fucking genius <3

Sunshine - a Din series by @zialltops (AO3)

This is such a sweet soft tooth rotting ass din fic. It's adorable and I love it <3

----------- oldies but goodies ----------

Soaked - a Javi P one shot by @joelscruff

say it again - a Dieter one shot by @ezrasbirdie

Dieter Bravo x Roommates AU - a Dieter one shot by @fuckyeahdindjarin

The Plan (and all its iterations) - a Dieter one shot by @prolix-yuy

No One Else - a Din one shot by @beskarandblasters

I'm Coming Back for You, Baby - a Dieter one shot by @jazzelsaur (AO3)

In a perfect world, you love me - a Din Series by @theidiotwhowritesthings

Carry out - a Javi P one shot by @soullumii

The Saint, the sinner, and the devil - a Joel/Javi P Series by @joelsgirl

Pretty When You Cry - a Joel one shot by @violentdelightsandviolentends

Wrap Party - a Dieter one shot by @write-and-buried

You Make Loving Fun - a Frankie Series by @redahlia-writes

---------------------

P.S. If you like Andor... @beskarandblasters has been writing excellent Cassian fics recently!!

And to my mutuals who have written new stuff this week that I didn't read I am so sorry... I'll get there eventually!!

---------------------

Happy Reading!

#fic recs #the spreadsheet digest #fanfiction recommendations #pedro pascal #pedro pascal fanfiction #pedro fics #pedro pascal character fanfiction #joel miller #frankie morales #din djarin #max phillips #dave york #dieter bravo #javi peña #jack daniels #agent whiskey #the mandalorian